All language subtitles for Rock.and.Rolls.Greatest.Failure.Otway.The.Movie.2013.1080p.WEBRip.x265-RARBG2_English

[guitar playing]

[crowd cheering]

♪ Look out, baby ♪

[crowd cheering]

♪ Look out, pal ♪

♪ Here's the kid
Who's going to get the blues ♪

♪ When you go away ♪

♪ I'm on fire ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm in love ♪

♪ With a girl who's not the girl she was ♪

♪ When I was out with her ♪

♪ I saw you in the garden baby
And you looked so debonair ♪

♪ But you were up the flowers ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm sure
They're gonna get you yet ♪

♪ I won't try to say goodbye ♪

♪ Maybe I'll just kick myself inside ♪

♪ I really wanted to go home ♪

♪ You might say that today ♪

♪ Was the very last time
You walked this way ♪

♪ You're gonna tell him on your own ♪

♪ Well I'd tell him where to go to baby
But you know I wouldn't dare ♪

♪ Beware of the flowers
'Cause I'm sure they're gonna get ♪

♪ You ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ She said it's hard for me
To explain to you ♪

♪ The brightness of the light ♪

♪ I can still remember
When my life was like that ♪

One thing I'm doing
this year which is nice

is I'm taking Deadly my roadie

back to my old school, The Grange County
Secondary School in Aylesbury.

And we're taking a group of sixth formers
on a course

on how you make a living
and a career in the music industry.

Deadly, throw.

I wish someone had done that
when I was at school.

I mean, no pop stars came to this school
when I was there.

I mean, I've had to make
it up as I've gone along.

-[whooping]
-Okay.

Okay, I'll give you a note.

♪ Ahhh ♪

-[Theremin trilling]
-[laughing]

[John]I guess what my students wanted
to know was how did I become successful?

[Theremin buzzing]

This is 1977, the big year of punk rock.

I wanted to be a pop star
since I was nine years old.

I was now 24, and this was my first
experience of national television.

Me and Wild Willy Barrett were booked
to play The Old Grey Whistle Test.

We were gonna make the most out of it.

Very simply, they're crazy.

Anyway, you'll see it all now
as we hear two numbers

from this latest chart bound recording,

John Otway and Wild Willy Barrett
in "Really Free".

Bye-bye, now.

♪ I go walking down to your house ♪

♪ Tell me baby is it good for me ♪

♪ Your ma and pa
They just wanna kick me ♪

♪ I say Cor baby that's really free ♪

♪ Really free, really free ♪

♪ Really, really, really, really free
Kick me ♪

[Bob] Yeah, I mean, there wasn't a lot
of music on TV in those days

it wasn't multi-channel like it is now.

I mean, we had BBC One, BBC Two, and ITV.

So at the point that John

appeared on the show in 1977

he would've been seen on that show

by about five and a half million people,
probably.

Yeah, so, and the impact of his
performance was incredible, as we know.

That moment in that performance

changed his life like forever.

♪ Just so damn sad ♪

[Bob] He crushed his testicles…

[Bob laughs] …on the amplifier.

♪ Oh you say-- ♪ Ow!

Who would've ever known?

One foot went one side of the amplifier,

the other foot went the other side
of the amplifier,

and the whole weight of my body

came piling down
on the most delicate parts of my anatomy.

And did it hurt.

[John]Well, it's still regarded
as a pretty impressive performance.

♪ Oh you say-- ♪ Ow!

[laughing]

First time I saw Otway and Barrett
was on the telly in 1977,

Top of the Pops,
The Old Grey Whistle Test,

absolutely stunning, Barrett,
stunning guitarist,

Otway, just this anarchistic,

brilliant freestyle rock singer, um…

And I think after those initial 1977
TV appearances,

all the kids at school
were as into Otway and Barrett

as they were as any other
serious fan at the time,

Motörhead, The Clash, Led Zeppelin,

we took Otway and Barrett
really seriously.

And because of that people started
flocking to the shows,

"Really Free" the single
went up into the charts,

and within a couple of weeks
we were back here on top of the pops.

Really is excellent music, isn't it?

His record is coming to the charts
this week on number 27,

making its debut on top of the pops,
for the chart scene, anyway.

So here's John Otway
and Wild Willy Barrett.

♪ Well I wake up in the morning ♪

♪ Tell me baby what do you see ♪

♪ I see my true love and she walks up
And she kisses me and I say ♪

♪ Cor baby that's really free ♪

I was signed to Polydor the same
time that The Jam was signed to Polydor.

It was fascinating because
we've had this hit

and because I'd done my top of the pops
in the whistle test.

Polydor gave me this huge advance worth…

About a quarter of a million pounds,
I think, the deal was worth to John, then.

And if you wanna put that in perspective,
we go six and a half grand to The Jam.

Um… yes.

One thing about being a pop star
and having all that money,

it meant I could start
living like a pop star.

I was able to move out
of my one bedroom flat in Fulham

and move into this lovely pop star's flat
in Maida Vale.

Les Gray lived next door,

Dave Edmunds and Dave Stewart
lived just round here.

But because I was now a pop star
and Polydor had given me this big advance

I was able to join them.

The other thing I was able to do

was buy a nice car.

I mean, I couldn't drive,
but I could buy a nice car.

John rang me one day and said,
"I want to get a car."

I said, "Okay, what sort of a car?"

He said, "A Bentley."

I said, "John, you don't drive."

He said, "Don't care, I want a Bentley."

So I was given the job
to go find him a Bentley, which I did.

And of course, after that,
either myself or Jeff Poulter,

otherwise known as "Jeff Spotter"
what he used to be,

had to drive it for him.

[John] Yeah, but when I got back home
on my bike every night,

it looked great parked outside the house.

They advanced him so much money,
I built a recording studio,

um, Otway bought a car,

he couldn't drive. [chuckles]

So I had a quick word with him, sort of.

Remind him that I could,
so what's the point of having a car?

I had my bank make these checks up
with my photo on them, right?

And the idea behind these checks was

I'd go down to my local shop
and buy my eggs and milk with them.

And the thing was, you knew, right,

that the shop keeper wasn't
gonna cash that check.

No, he was gonna frame it,

and hang it on the wall, saying,
"John Otway buys his eggs and milk here."

[sighs] It's great being a pop star.

I think Otway has made it really big
in his own mind and it affected him,

umm, terribly,

and he had this thing for a while where

he didn't go on the tube in case
nobody recognised him.

[John] So Polydor were eagerly awaiting
what the next hit was gonna be.

We did have one other good punk song.

♪ Beware of the flowers
'Cause I'm sure they're gonna get you ♪

But we'd used that on the B side.

I did have this rather lovely ballad
that I'd record go off on my own back,

and we recorded a 100 piece orchestra

to try and impress this girl
I really liked.

And I thought wouldn't it be nice,
you know,

if that was put out as a single

'cause it'd go up in the charts
and she didn't like me that much

but she was gonna be impressed,
wasn't she, with that song in the charts?

And it's a lovely version
with 100 piece orchestra,

and, yeah.

If you're a girl, I mean…
you'd like that, wouldn't you?

He had all this money and he always wanted
to do an orchestral version,

but it came out sounding
like a Walt Disney film track.

I mean, that was actually
the follow up single to "Really Free".

And I didn't know about it,

I was driving up the M1 to a gig,

in between worked on that second album.

And I heard Otway's new solo single
come on the radio.

"Geneve", yes, that was a record which had
strings on it, great big orchestra.

and I think the company as a whole
really liked John Otway

and they thought, here is the possibility.

Okay, punk's okay, but we don't really
like being flobbed at, you know,

and going into places
where there's a scrap every night.

Um, and it was fairly conservative
management,

in those days, myself included, you know,
that was running Polydor.

And we thought,
"Well, yes, we can cross this boy over.

"Really Free", "Beware of the Flowers",

fantastic TV appearances with Barrett.

What does Otway do?

He puts out "Geneve".

And we all go to the record shops,
we buy "Geneve".

Oh god, it's gonna be just like

"Beware of the Flowers" or "Really Free",
and it's not.

It's this awful over produced garbage.

[upbeat orchestral music]

There's Otway looking like
some sort of French folk guitarist on it,

Not the sort of anarchistic punk
that we all greatly loved.

God, what's wrong with the bloke?

When he had Cor Baby,I mean,
the company went bananas after that.

I mean, they went ballistic, they were
talking about John as being a huge star.

He's gonna be mega.

♪ Really, really, really free ♪

♪ Really, really, really, really free ♪

Then they came out with "Geneve",

which is a straight down the line,

almost middle of the road single

right smack dab in the middle
of the new wave thing.

♪ For sitting
Oh yeah ♪

♪ In my dreams ♪

♪ Well things are flying
For the screaming ladies of Los Angeles ♪

♪ And when I decided that would
Be my stage ♪

And he used to go to choir practise
on a Friday night,

well, he'd lose his voice.

Then he got scouts on a Thursday night,

and shouted out
and he'd lose his voice again,

he used to be always losing his voice.

So I can't really think why he took
to singing

because I thought, well,
if he's always gonna lose his voice

what a silly career to take.

It really was, because he used to
completely lose his voice with shouting.

I mean, he sings better in tune now
than he did,

but he can't really sing, can he?

[laughing] He hasn't got
a singing voice at all.

Don't know why they even
kept him in the choir.

♪ I was 30 ♪

♪ I remember
That was the end of times for me ♪

I think after "Geneve",
I'm pretty certain that…

there must've been a meeting somewhere
where everyone went,

"I wonder, what if we'd
done the right thing?"

[John]Not the sort of hit,
not what I had in mind.

It was the original floppy disc.

There was only one place
that record was going.

Willy threw a bit of a strap after that.

He started doing solo things.

Willy found my favourite
guitar in the studio

and used it to launch his solo career.

It was surprising, really,
'cause "Geneve" wasn't just a flop,

it was the start of a long series
of flops.

For my next solo single,
I'd written this song

about the worry of your girlfriend
getting pregnant.

It was called "Babies In The Club".

♪ Babies in the club ♪

♪ B, B, B, Babies in the club ♪

♪ Babies in the club ♪

[John] And that wasn't a hit, either.

We had to try and find a way
to make all the people

that were turning up to the shows
buy the records.

The first idea we came up with was this
idea of live in your living room, right?

Amongst all that records Polydor pressed,

three copies didn't have any vocals
on 'em, just the backing track, right?

and the idea was that the fans
would keep buying the record,

hoping that they get one of the ones
that had the singing on,

because if they got one of those,
then I would turn up to their house,

stand between their stereo speakers
and add the vocals live,

in their living room.

But I mean, god, I love the live show.

[shouting]

[crying]

[blabbering]

But you wouldn't want him in your house,

the last thing you'd want
is Otway in your house.

[shouting]

[John] Well, two out of the three people
who got those copies

actually had me around
their house singing.

And wouldn't that have made
a great piece of television?

So we went up to Scotland to East Kilbride

where someone had bought the single
without any vocal on

and wanted John to come
and sing in their living room,

and we went up there
and we were very excited because

the BBC News had said
they wanted to film it,

and we thought, great this is it,
this has really worked, this idea.

We're gonna be on the news,
this is gonna be a big hit.

And we get all the way up to Scotland
to find out that the BBC

had been stopped from filming John

because the Musician's Union wanted John
to rerecord the backing track,

so which we'll see was pointless,
it defeated the whole thing.

So we decided that if we weren't
gonna get into the charts by fair means,

we'd get into the charts by foul.

We'd cheat or we'd hype the charts.

Compared to today,
only a small amount in shops

contributed towards the charts.

Well, we knew where they were,

we had a 10-12 man strike force team
who could leave them in the stores, so…

Logistical nightmare, no.
Very easy to do, actually.

He worked how to make the people who were
coming to the live show buy the records.

The only way you can get into a venue

on the tour that we were going to do
was to buy the record,

so you got it for free,
as long as you have the single,

you could come through the door
to see a gig.

Turns out that a single at the time
was cheaper than a gig ticket,

so the whole idea was really popular.

They had no intention
at ever playing the damn thing.

But as long as they had it with them,
they come along, we fold it in half,

broken, stuffed in the back pocket,

most important thing
was they bought the record.

These are selling tickets for the people
who wanted to come to the shows.

And the idea was if we sold
enough of those gig ticket singles,

we get into bottom end of the charts.

If we got into bottom end of the charts
we'd probably get Top of the Pops,

and then we'd have a huge hit.

The reason why we came to it
was we suddenly realised,

we're gonna go on the road with this band
and John, and we have no income.

So the only way we could physically do it
was to actually not have hotels.

I actually mentioned it to Otway three
or four years before

that we should do a tent tour,
that it'd cut the cost down on touring.

It's just that…

Then, he didn't want to do it,
and at this particular time he did,

because we weren't
getting paid for the gigs.

So naturally we had two vehicles.

Right, we had a full transit van
with all the music equipment

and the gear we used
to head off to the gigs,

and the Volkswagen camper van

that headed off with all the camping gear

to the four star campsite.

There were six or eight of us
sleeping in a car tent

Mrs Otway provided for us.

We travelled around the country
from gig to gig to gig,

putting this thing up, pulling it down,
it was freezing cold,

raining most of the time,
it was a nightmare.

[John] This was a DK 50/80 tent tour.

And it worked fantastically well,
we crammed all these…

gigs into one week so with his sort of
few sales that we pick up anyway,

and then all these gigs we were doing,

we sold enough singles
to get into the top 40.

And, Top of the Pops, we knew
we were gonna get Top of the Pops.

Except…

the Musician's Union, again…

[chuckles] Unfortunately,
decided to go on strike,

And so the Top of the Pops
was taken off the air

the week that he would've had
that second hit.

So I had to try and find a way
to get on television despite the strike.

But when we went to do Fun Factory,
which was a TV thing,

there was a strike then as well,

I'm quite sure they were trying
to stop us.

We got in saying we were
a travelling theatre, I think.

'Cause it wasn't entirely music, was it?
It's quite theatrical, as well.

The band, most unusual,

not like ordinary bands going
posh around the country.

Oh, no, they live in tents.

They're on tour,
camping in tents in fields,

and having a good time.

and to get in the tour,
you don't pay money.

Now, you might think that's different.

You do pay, but what you do is
you buy the record

and take it in with you.

Who is it? It's Otway and Barrett.

♪ Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah ♪

♪ You've been more oh yeah yeah yeah
You've been more oh yeah yeah ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Start ♪

♪ Bad bad bad bad sucker sucker bad bad
Go go down down all all way way ♪

♪ My ♪

♪ Sing it sing it bad bad
Come on come on come on ♪

♪ He won't he won't go go ♪

♪ Say ♪

[John] I now gather that the idea
behind doing Saturday morning telly

is he had did this thing
got all these little kids watching go,

"Mum, mum, look at this. This is great.
Buy that record for me."

Ah, well, bad luck. Try again.

But god there must be a limit to what
Barrett can put up with Otway

and his attention seeking all the time.

You can see why Barrett wrote "Headbutt",

you know, it's just an opportunity
to hit Otway for all his stupidity

and get his own back.

[metal clanging]

It was vicious, yeah.
It was really vicious, yeah.

John would draw blood every night.

I don't know if
you've ever headbutted an SM58.

But if you do, they cut you,

especially when they've been batted around
the stage with the back of your guitar

frequently, because they tend to have
little wire bits poking out

that will stab you in the head,
so you bleed.

So we would put

cigarette butts that had been stamped on
on the floor,

with gaffer tape over the end of the SM58,

and silver gaffer tape
so it didn't show up quite so much

so that when John was forced to headbutt
it by Willy at the end of the night,

it wouldn't actually
cause too much damage.

Of course, he still bled because
Willy would usually find the one

we hadn't gaffered up.

Last place, last place.
Dum de de dum de de dum de de dum.

De de dum de de dum de de rum da da.

Got involved in a head on collision
with a tanker driver.

And I wondered what it is that went
through my windscreen.

Through his windscreen.

There might've been
another one in between.

And I give 'em a headbutt,
I'll give ya headbutts.

Then another, give it headbutts.

-[metal clanging]
-Give it headbutts.

I'll give it headbutts. Dum da da dum.

[both] Dum da da dum da da dum da da dum
da da dum da da dum da da dum dum.

Ow, ow.

Oh, another verse, another verse.

Met this fellow early in the sport
fifth and karate you know the sort.

-Cool, did you give him a headbutt?
-Yeah.

[metal banging]

Just like that. I give him headbutts.

Da da da da da. I give headbutts.

-Whistle. I give headbutts.
- Ow!

[audience laughing]

Da da da da. I'll give him headbutts.

I gave him. Come on.

-Headbutts.
-Headbutts.

[grunts]

-Goodnight!
-[audience cheering]

"Headbutts" has got to be
one of the best live pieces

of the Otway and Barrett sets.

Um, you know, watching Barrett beating
Otway about the head with a microphone,

the bleeding forehead,
it was very, very funny.

Of course that doesn't
translate at all to vinyl.

[John]Ow, ah.

[Barrett] Went downtown for a cup of tea,

and I saw two skinnies looking at me,
I'll give 'em headbutts.

Da da da da, I'll give 'em headbutts.
I'll give 'em headbutts,

[whistles] I'll give 'em headbutts.
Come on up, da da da.

And besides, the BBC certainly
aren't going to play it on radio.

[John] Then me and Willy split up.

But it wasn't because of the headbutts,

it was because of this solo album
I'd recorded, as I'd called it,

All Balls And No Willy.

I thought it was really funny.

Eventually, we actually
got dropped from Polydor.

Thing is, if you're a rock star,

I mean, you want to be on
a major label, don't you?

So I asked Chris France have you had
any ideas how we could, you know,

get back in with the big record companies.

John decides to record
a version of "Jerusalem".

So I sent a copy of it to Paul Conroy
who used to run Stiff Records,

and signed him then,
and was now running Warner Brothers.

To my surprise,
Paul rung me back and said,

"This would be great to put in
to the Christmas schedules."

So I rang John up and said,

"Hey, guess what? We've done it again.
We've pulled a major label."

And we went out and got drunk.

Then, for the next three weeks,

I tried to get hold of Paul Conroy
without success

because he'd obviously got into his
signing department,

the A&R department
of the record company, to his staff,

and said, "We're gonna do this
for Christmas."

And they'd all gone, "You must be mad."

So after that three weeks we decided

that it wasn't likely
that we were gonna be able to put it out.

So we decided,
"Let's put it out for them."

It turns out you can't get a factory
to make WEA records if you're not WEA.

But I found what you could do is you could
find a factory to press some white labels.

And it wasn't that difficult
to find a dodgy printer

that'd make some WEA stickers for you.

I thought it would be
a fun thing to do was

see if I could get my sixth formers
to make some WEA records.

And they're pretty good.

And if you actually look at one
of the records made by my sixth formers,

a lot of people would say,

"Yep, that does actually look
like a WEA record."

So we made up a press statement

and had one of John's personalised checks
drawn up to pay an advance of 200 pounds

'cause they'd had a bad year,

and they were very busy.

And we buy the package
around the press statement

and the white labels
with the Warner Brothers label on them

to Radio One and Capital.

And within an hour, Capital had played it,

within an hour and a half,
Radio One had played it,

and 20 minutes later,
Paul Conroy rang up and said,

"Okay, we give up, we'll put it out."

WEA didn't think it was quite as funny
as Capital Radio and Radio One did.

But they didn't want to be seen
as party poopers,

they wanted to keep in
with the radio station,

so they actually decided to lose money
on an Otway flop.

Problem with that is,

to be able to get on
a major label after that.

So the next few flops
were all on little labels.

Of course when Otway gets his head
around the fact that the career's

not going where he wants it to go to,

in fact, he's failed, um…

Otway is going to be
rock and roll's greatest failure.

You know, he's going to do anything,
he's going to do it the best.

And hats off to him,

he's certainly becoming rock and roll's
greatest failure, undoubtedly.

[John] So I wrote my autobiography.

Cor Baby, That's Really Me!
Rock and Roll's Greatest Failure.

It had been great for my course 'cause
I was happy to get Deadly the Roadie

to hand them out as the textbook.

So I decided to go sell myself
as rock and roll's greatest failure.

A lot of people say

it's not a good idea to sell yourself
as a failure or call yourself a failure.

I didn't have much opportunity
to do anything else.

He had basically just written a book
about what a prat he was,

But I thought it was great
'cause we would write press releases

about how rubbish he was,
send them to the papers,

instead of all the press releases
they're getting

saying how brilliant
a product or a person is.

I would say, well, you know, John Otway
steadfastly refused to learn

to play the guitar, sing, dance,

or display any talent whatsoever.

We started to get press again.

Tonight he'll be playing Glastonbury
Will you please welcome…

rock and roll's greatest failure,
this is John Otway.

From superstars to super flop,

one of pop's greatest failures,
John Otway.

Most spectacular failure in pop music.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome John Otway.

[audience cheering]

In fact when people came
to the merchandise stand,

they said, "Don't buy the records."

"They're terrible. Buy the book."

[John] Or buy the t-shirt.

"John Otway,
I can't believe it's not better."

[John] Around 1992, I was approaching 40.

Carol, my girlfriend and I,

had a daughter, Amy,
who is now two years old.

And everybody, myself included,

thought I should take my career
a little more seriously.

And be a bit more responsible.

[audience laughing]

So I stopped putting it out records
that weren't doing very well

and concentrated on making my live show
as professional as possible.

I also teamed up with Richard Holgarth.

A great guitarist,
probably the best in Harlow.

[audience laughing]

I've played in bands before
that take things very seriously,

and, you know, wanted to do all kinds
of strange things like

play in time,

same key, that sort of stuff,

and with John it's very easy because…

most of the audiences don't remember,
don't know at the end of the day

what key or what time
you're supposed to be in.

So as long as I'm doing something
which looks confident

and I know where I am, um…
it's really not a problem,

it's much easier than trying to do
anything sensible.

[shouting]

Almost every gig
has got some moment which…

catches me out.

♪ Love me ♪

The longer it catches me out,

the worse it gets
and the more memorable it gets.

Sometimes there are times where I'm just
sort of standing afraid he's gonna…

You know, what is happening?

♪ As the storm clouds gather
Hey look at Jim, I've made an umbrella ♪

Every single gig
has got something happening

which I know nothing about whatsoever.

♪ Hey Don
picture the three of us dancing ♪

♪ There's me and David
And that's a character ♪

♪ Our clothes are soaking
And they stick to our skin ♪

♪ We're laughing and laughing
And bouncing and singing ♪

♪ Going yeah yeah yeah dancing around ♪

♪ Whoa whoa ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Dancing in the rain ♪

♪ Dancing in the rain ♪

He ripped his shirt off and…

sang the song and ate the shirt.

One of the great things
about working with Richard

was he'd been in lots and lots of bands,
and knew some really great musicians,

and I thought we'd get together
a really good Otway band.

I can remember him talking about
getting a band together.

And was thinking,
you earn 250 quid a night,

and you're moaning about having
not enough money at the moment.

You must be a loony.
I said "Are you sure?"

Then I remember insisting

we took a camera crew
to actually film the occasion

when we actually got together.

'Cause I thought at some stage
in the future

a lot of people are gonna want to
see what it was like.

-Right.
-Right.

I just thought I'd quickly
introduce myself.

I'm John Otway.

I know you're probably a bit nervous

you know this being the first time we've
worked together and everything, but…

Um…

Just remember,
even though I'm the star of this outfit,

I'm almost as like
to make mistakes as you are.

Um, okay, but anything you want to work?
Anyone who's had a hit before?

[man] Yeah, I have, yeah.

Oh, great, well, you'll know
just how much more exciting it is

than just doing pub gigs.

[man] If you look at the list,
they are all pub gigs.

It's like exciting pub gigs.

Um, right, um…

Who's the drummer?

- I am.
-[John] Okay, well…

Okay, well, I thought you could do it.

So if you could sort of, like,
sort of keep the rhythm.

You're a bassist yeah?

If you could work together, maybe sort of
get some full groove going,

maybe it's a good way to start.

As ever with John, he was right.

Some idea that he comes up with
seems complete lunacy

turned out to be a stroke of genius,
absolutely.

The big band was really,
really significant

in helping him turn things around
and bring it back on course.

And of course, we just never
looked back after that.

You see him go up and up and up.

♪ You come over trip a pair ♪

♪ Acting like an introvert ♪

♪ You treat me like a jerk
You made me do all the work ♪

♪ You're just a bog flirt
A pretty girl in your skirt ♪

♪ Rub my face in the dirt
Why don't you? ♪

♪ Just give us a baby
Give us a baby ♪

♪ Rumpelstiltskin
Rumpelstiltskin ♪

♪ Give us a baby, give us a baby ♪

♪ Rumpelstiltskin
Rumpelstiltskin ♪

♪ Just give us the baby ♪

I said, "How many gigs have you done?"
He said, "About 2,000 gigs."

"Can you found out how many?", he said.
I said, "Well, we could do Gig 2000."

This was in the 1990s.

And the year 2000,
was still an emotive thing

and the number 2,000 still was.

He dug out his diaries
'cause he always keeps

a serious record of everything
he's ever done.

Uh, and we managed
to make a t-shirt with all the gigs on,

all 2,000 gigs he done leading up
to this big event of the Astoria.

I promote Otway's 2,000th gig
at the Astoria, uh…

trying crossroad.

[Richard C.] Otway wants
a hydraulic crane.

[Paul] That came from my partner,
this one.

She's running a construction company
that fitted sprinklers in buildings.

[Richard C.] The idea
of the hydraulic crane was, um…

It would lift him up

during Holgarth's guitar solo
in "Best Dream".

[rock music plays]

[Paul] A little bit of John went up high…

[chuckles] …above the crowd,
instead of enjoying Richard's guitar solo.

He wasn't allowed to unplug him
halfway through, for one.

Holgarth had put together
a fantastic band for Gig 2000,

and for the tour
immediately before it, uh…

with Murray, Seymour, and Adam.

And this band gave Otway
all his credibility back.

[Richard C.] In the end,
we got 2,483 people in the venue,

which was, at least,
843 over the file limit

and we broke all bar records there, um…

There was more beers on that night
than they'd ever saw.

[Paul] We really felt after Gig 2000

that Otway's career
was absolutely back on track.

They thought it was a big landmark.

I mean, filling a huge
London theatre like that?

I remember thinking afterwards…

You know, if we can fill
a big London theatre like that,

how much bigger is somewhere like…

The Royal Albert Hall.

[John] And it turns out,
it's only twice as big.

So, with a big promotional package,

I reckon we could actually do
The Royal Albert Hall.

[audience chanting, singing]

[John] And as soon as I decided that,
I thought…

you don't just wanna do
this gig with the band.

We're gonna do this gig like anybody else
would wanna do Albert Hall,

with a huge great orchestra.

Normally, the price is a bit prohibitive

to use a whole symphony orchestra
for just one gig.

But I was in the Aylesbury Youth Orchestra
when I was a kid,

and I take that,
and they were still going.

[John] And I thought to myself,
"Wow, I could actually introduce them."

Ladies and gentlemen,
they've gone through a few line of changes

but please welcome my first ever band,
the Aylesbury Youth Orchestra.

[classical orchestrated music plays]

There's a lot of people I'm meeting today.
First of all…

…Hugh, who's the conductor
of the youth orchestra and, um…

Basically runs
the Aylesbury Youth Orchestra.

He's meeting up with the guys
during the orchestration.

It's been an outrageous amount of time.

I'm basically all of a sudden
orchestrating the pieces for, um…

for the orchestra.

And it's the first time,
Hugh's the chance to…

will have a chance
to actually look at the score

or have any idea
what we're planning to do at all.

I think I can enjoy this.

They would enjoy it.

[sighs] I mean, it looks to me
as if it's just perfect

because there's enough interest
for everybody.

Yet, it's not so complicated.
It's going to freak the life out of them.

-Yeah.
-Yeah, I've been aware of that.

Great.

[Paul] So, Otway wants a full
50-piece orchestra

and three of his songs orchestrated.

He even wants flowers,

not that can be presented to Hugh
the conductor of the orchestra,

but flowers that can be presented to him.

He's organised his own flowers.

But worst of all,

he wants this black Thoroughbred stallion

that's supposed to come on stage
at the end of "The Highwayman" and…

and rear up.

And, then, gallop off again.

[man] Have you asked them
seriously about it?

Yeah, yeah, that's why it be great,
just got a circus.

'Cause you gotta know when to say that.
Get a circus.

-Get a circus horse.
-[man] Okay, brilliant.

Could easily, you know,
could easily manage those steps

-[man laughs]
-…and sort of gallop across.

I mean, despair.

But the Albert Hall said no horses.

[melodious acoustic music plays]

[John] It was great taking the band down
to Aylesbury to meet the orchestra,

and it sounded just like the record.

["Geneva" plays]

♪ Geneva, take her to yourself ♪

♪ And watch her while she rests ♪

♪ As she talks of you as home ♪

[Paul] "The Highwayman" was different,
though.

The bleak reality,

that Otway
has no musical ability whatsoever

becomes glaringly apparent.

[Paul] The orchestra is brilliant.
Otway hadn't got a clue.

He just couldn't sing with the orchestra.

[singing "The Highwayman"]
♪ And the highwayman comes in riding ♪

♪ Riding, riding, riding ♪

♪ Up the old inn-door ♪

[intense orchestrated music plays]

[John] I think it's the wrong verse.

[Hugh talking indistinctly]

Sounds great though, doesn't it?

-Do you know where you are in it?
-[John] No.

That probably explains
why you got it all wrong, then.

[John chuckles] Yeah, you're right.

I thought having these pieces written

for Otway and orchestra
was a really good idea.

I thought the fans would love it,
which they did.

Problem was, though, Otway and orchestra,
I wasn't very good at.

To hide the fact
that I was getting lost in the rehearsals

sort of by the humming or making notes.

'Cause I never had any idea,
I hadn't got a clue where I was.

Boy, I really didn't.

[intense orchestrated music plays]

And it was frightening.

I mean, even at the dress rehearsal

at The Royal Albert Hall,
I was getting it wrong.

[singing "The Highwayman"]

[orchestrated music plays]

All I basically had to do was get up
in front of 4,000 people.

And there are these beautiful arrangements

that John Paul has spent
six months working on.

And the orchestra, what are they gonna do?

They spent three months rehearsing them,

and they got it brilliantly right,
and they sounded great.

[classical orchestrated music plays]

And there was this huge danger

that the whole thing had come
to a crashing halt

because I started the wrong verse.

[audience cheering]

Right, the next one's an epic.
It's, uh, got loads and loads of verses.

And apart from the ones here tonight,

I've always got the verses
in the wrong order.

And an orchestra, they're like a tank.

You can't do what I do with the band.

-Like, "Shut up!"
-[audience laughs]

'Cause they follow the conductor, not me.

-Um…
-[audience laughs]

So, uh…
I'll just say a little prayer. [laughs]

-[audience laughs]
-Okay, let's go for it.

[intense orchestrated music plays]

[sings "The Highwayman"]
♪ The wind was a torrent of darkness ♪

♪ Among the gusty trees ♪

♪ The moon was a ghostly galleon ♪

♪ Tossed upon cloudy seas ♪

♪ The road was a ribbon of moonlight ♪

♪ Over the purple moor ♪

♪ And the highwayman come riding
Riding, riding, riding ♪

♪ Up to the old inn-door ♪

And you can't hold back
on your performance.

You're gonna go for it.

♪ And dark in the dark old inn-yard ♪

♪ A stable wicket creaked ♪

♪ Where Tim
The ostler listened ♪

♪ His face was white and weak ♪

♪ His eyes were hollows of madness ♪

♪ And his hair was like mouldy hay ♪

[John] I remember
at each verse I passed thinking,

"Yes!"

Yes, I… I've got over that one,
onto the next.

♪…he listened
As he heard the robber say ♪

[John] I started getting it right.

I can't believe my luck.

♪ There was death at every window ♪

♪ There was hell at one dark window ♪

♪ 'Cause best could see
Through the casement ♪

♪ The road that he would ride ♪

And I kept on getting it right,
and I remember during the last line…

♪ Then a highwayman comes riding
Riding, riding, riding ♪

♪ Up the old inn-door ♪

[John] I remember thinking
after doing that line…

"I've done it!
I actually got to the end of this piece."

-[music stops]
-[audience cheers]

[John] And, then,
the band came on to do "Geneva",

and I knew how to do that
'cause that was the same as the record.

[John] And then something
really sweet happened.

Amy, my daughter,
came on stage with some flowers

that some admirer got for me.

With the Youth Orchestra!

Oh, sweet…

It's Amy.

[audience cheering]

[John] The second half of The Albert Hall
was, basically, a band show.

[people chanting, singing]
♪ Otway, Otway ♪

[announcer] Here you go!
Otway and the Big Band!

And everybody really enjoyed that
'cause we were,

you know, up there,
doing what we knew how to do…

which mainly involved, posing.

["Baby, It's The Real Thing" plays]

[John] A great, great night.

♪ Baby, it's the real thing this time ♪

♪ Baby, it's the real thing ♪

♪ Baby, it's the real thing this time ♪

♪ I know where I'm going tonight ♪

[John] One of the scariest,
but probably best nights of my life.

♪ You've been carried away amazing ♪

♪ And let her know time to go ♪

♪ And if absence is making
Your heart grow fonder ♪

♪ So you can wait longer, you know? ♪

♪ If your thoughts keep flying
The planes of desire ♪

♪ So you can feel the heat ♪

♪ Now warm yourself
And turn to the fire ♪

♪ You know you got it right
And you can say ♪

♪ Baby, it's the real thing this time ♪

♪ Baby, it's the real thing ♪

♪ Baby, it's the real thing this time ♪

♪ It's got to be fine
But I know what I'm doing ♪

♪ I know where I'm going, baby ♪

♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Hey, baby
It's the real thing this time ♪

♪ I know where I'm going tonight ♪

Thank you!

-Big Band!
-[audience cheering]

Coming up the millennium, the internet
started having a big impact.

I already got an email address
and a webpage.

But the thing that made
the biggest difference was

a fan actually got me a news group,
which all the fans joined.

And it was great 'cause they can,
actually, start getting involved.

You know, help make me a bigger star.

It was about that time
that the BBC were doing,

had started this Nation's Favourite Lyric.

The, um, vote.

This is the campaign
going into the millennium,

where people were invited
to write in their, or…

or nominate the, you know, the…
the songs with the greatest lyrics.

It occurred to me that,
if you voted for The Beatles,

you can vote for "Let It Be",
or "Hey, Jude".

Lots and lots of different songs.

And it occurred to me with the internet
that if we could galvanise people

and get them to vote for one song,
and one song alone,

"Beware of the Flowers
'Cause I'm Sure They're Going to Get You",

we might have a chance of getting
somewhere in this chart.

Because John, of course, is a…
is a sort of lyric laureate, isn't he?

I mean, "Beware of the Flowers

'Cause I'm Sure
They're Going to Get You, Yeah." [laughs]

And it was also a phone-in poll.

So, they didn't have anybody
tracking the emails,

where they come from,
or what have you there.

Um…

So, we kinda got together,
and I went to that comment gig

with 50 bits of papers saying,

"Vote for Otway.
Vote for 'Beware Of The Flowers'."

And the fans, right, did this
absolutely brilliant job of voting.

And at the end of Poetry Week,
this was on television,

Let's begin the results with the lyric
voted the nation's most popular.

[woman host] At number ten,
"Stardust" by Hoagy Carmichael.

[male host] At number nine,
"Nights In White Satin" by Justin Hayward.

[woman host] At number eight,
"Sit Down" by James.

[man host] At number seven,
"Beware Of The Flowers" by John Otway.

[woman host] At number six,
"Yesterday" by Paul McCartney.

Yeah, just below Paul McCartney.

It's fantastic, what an…
what an amazing achievement.

Cuegot up and arms
about the whole thing, didn't they?

[Ali] They reckon we fixed this.

[John] Okay, let's make this
the big one thought way.

It was then that we realised
just how powerful this one group

and this internet presence could be.

It's an amazing thing,
but we won miles ahead of anybody.

Absolutely miles ahead of anybody,
pioneers.

It's people like Otway
that do these things that…

that really make you think,
"Yeah, come on. Let's do this."

You know?

Again, with John, with his fans,
I think people genuinely love him.

So, he can mobilise this fan base
to help him achieve stuff.

One really sweet thing
the fans did was they,

they clubbed together
and bought me a birthday present.

It was a really,
really good birthday present.

The initial thing with ONElist

is we started buying him
birthday presents.

Um…

And one of those,
possibly the second year that the list

come together and started to grow, um…

somebody, some foolish, foolish person
suggested we buy him the Theremin.

[Theremin plays]

But, I have to say,
Otway is a really good Theremin player.

He, actually, you know…

He, actually, can do it quite well.
Maybe, that's nature's way.

Fuddling all that musicality
into one thing.

[Theremin plays a melodious tune]

Over the years,
I've been watching John's music.

He's blossomed from like,
sort of, a kid playing with it

to a really quite a masterful musician.
[laughs]

-[Chris D.] He flounces around it.
-[Theremin playing a comedic tune]

[Ali laughing]
I think Otway looks like a twat.

A totally uncoordinated…
It's incredibly funny.

It's amazingly funny watching him do it.

I mean, he's just…

He's turned un-coordination
into a very, very fine and amusing art.

It's, um… It was a great present, yeah.

[Theremin plays]

[upbeat acoustic music plays]

[audience laughs, applauds]

By using the internet and the news group,

the fans sent a couple
of really, really good things.

And they bought me a really nice
birthday present,

and they t got me into this chart.

And it was Morris, my old manager,

that thought of something really clever.

He put those two things together,

and managed to have think of something
that I really, really, really wanted.

Maybe, you could get them all to buy you,
go out and buy your record

put out a single for your 50th birthday.

They'll go and buy the record
and make it a hit.

And John, of course, the word "hit" just
hit home as it would with Otway.

He got very excited.

As soon as you realise
you can have another hit,

you start planning a big party
to celebrate.

I thought of somewhere really good.

The London Palladium at that time
were running Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,

but just for Monday till Saturday.

They had Sundays free, and that was
the night the charts came out.

So you could book the London Palladium
block and we'll have a big party

to celebrate being back in the charts.

It's just so typically
Otway though, isn't it?

"Um, right, well,
I'm having a birthday so, um…

I'll have a hit single, um…

So Paul, you go and book the Palladium
to celebrate the hits in, right?"

I noticed, whenever you play
"House Of The Rising Sun",

people would heckle.

[bass riff plays]

Well, there is…

-[audience] What?
-A house.

-[audience] Where?
-Down in New Orleans.

-[in unison] What's it called?
-Well, they call it…

[sings] ♪ The rising sun ♪

[in unison] What's it been?

Well, it's been the ruin
of many a poor boy.

-[audience] How do you know?
-Ah! Well, God, I know.

-[audience] Who's a Prat?
-I'm one.

So, I had this idea.

I thought, why not book
a really big concert

and we'd record everybody's heckle
so they can all be on the B-side.

And then Paul came up with
an absolutely brilliant idea.

Instead of booking up
a huge great concert hall,

why not book a really good studio
like Abbey Road?

So, we actually booked Abbey Road Studios

'cause our fans would absolutely love
recording there.

And I go along with the studio with…
with Otway for a recce.

Iconic studio. Incredible history.

But all Otway's interested in
is which studio Benny Hill

has recorded
"Ernie, The Fastest Milkman in the West".

[John] And that got to number one.

Perhaps, Abbey Road weren't completely
in faith with what Otway was.

So to get the project
under the Abbey Road radar,

we told the studio, um…

that he was an artist who needed to record
a thousand piece choir.

So, we got in touched with the press,

and I put out this press release,
and told them,

"How are we able gonna get
thousands of hecklers

to come to Abbey Road Studios
to yell at me?"

He phoned-up and he said, "I think
I'm a bit in trouble with Abbey Road."

They sort of got wind of what we're doing,

and they're not really
very happy about it.

I mean, they're pretty sniffy, Abbey Road.
It's quite an iconic place.

I don't really want 900 new-borns
turning up

and turn the place to shreds, of course.

Um, and because, I think,

Paul hadn't quite been honest with them
about what was going on,

they were getting very,
very nervous about it.

I said come, "Come on, mate,
we need to smooth this out."

So, I had to put the suit on, and go down,

and be reassuring,
and smooth everything out.

[John] But no one needed to worry.
It was quite odd.

It was like you were in somewhere sacred.

["House Of The Rising Sun"
By John Otway playing]

[John] 'Cause as soon
as the red light went on,

here's all the fans are thinking

"Wow, we're recording
in Abbey Road Studios."

And it was really, really special.

[sings] ♪ In the house of the rising sun ♪

[John] One thing that struck me was,

this is really special
for the band as well.

And Richard, my guitarist,
why he loved it!

And he did this solo, right?

And I've never ever learned it,

but quite so many notes
into one short solo ever.

Where's your foot?

[choir sings]
♪ Well, I got one foot on the platform ♪

[John] And where's your other foot?

[choir sings]
♪ The other foot on the train ♪

Where are you going?

[choir sings]
♪ I'm goin' back to New Orleans ♪

[John] What're you gonna wear?

[choir sings]
♪ To wear that ball and chain ♪

♪ There is a house… ♪

[John] So, what we did was
when they came in to the studio,

we got them to sign
a proper recording contract.

So when the record came out,
they could be credited as artists.

All of them.

But if you're an Otway fan being credited,

on a big hit record,
you're gonna love that, aren't you?

♪ And God, I know ♪

[in unison] Who's the prat?

I'm one.

[rock music plays continuously]

[all cheering]

"I've decided to have a hit
for my 50th birthday."

And I thought, "Ah, you're a genius.
Brilliant. Yeah." It worked.

Because we got the fan club in shape.
They're enough of them.

Probably, to buy him a hit,
which we'd get him in the top 40.

[Richard C.]And he said, "Good,
you got some time in your hand."

I said, "Yeah." He said,
"Oh, you can help me with the hit, then."

[Richard C.] 'Cause I've already booked
the Palladium at Sunday night,

at the week my birthday to celebrate.

I went, "John, that's a hundred
thousand pound gig. Uh, what's the song?"

He went, "Oh, don't worry about that."
And put the phone down.

A lot of people were saying that.

They were saying to me, "Look,
you got your party, you got your B-side.

Now, what's the hit going to be?"

We decided, or rather John decided,
that the fans would pick the hit.

John said, "I spent 21 years picking hits
and they've all been flops."

"It's about time somebody else had a go
and they're buying it."

"Why don't we let them choose it?"

I thought, what a good idea.

The fans could actually pick
what the hit was gonna be.

Not only were they singing on the B-side,
they're also choosing the hit itself.

So, we produced a CD with 12 tracks on,

and the fans are gonna actually vote

for which one they thought
would be the biggest hit.

[rock music plays]

Most people in music
just thought it was absolutely crazy.

I mean, you can't let the fans
pick the hit, you can't.

The music industry
doesn't think like that.

And this was the whole point of,
of the campaign in some respects.

That everybody said,
"You're not supposed to do this.

"You're not supposed to do that."
But, why not?

The problem we had, well, my fans,
actually, knew quite a lot about voting.

And some of them thought
it might not be quite fair.

Because even when I said,
"No, I'm not gonna fix this."

I wish I'd-- Yeah, you sure. Yeah.

Of course, you're not rich.
Of course, you're not.

So I thought, "Well, like, you know,
it was not gonna be credible

everyone was gonna think it is a fix."

[Richard C.] So, we got the Electoral
Reform Society involved.

[John] And they can actually
count the votes for us.

So I couldn't throw in a flop,
neither could Courtney.

And because the fans were voting
for what they thought was the biggest hit,

it wasn't my responsibility.

And I can put on some punk rock stuff.

["Rumpelstiltskin" plays]

We put on some pop stuff.

["We Know What She's Doing
(She's In Love)" by John Otway playing]

I thought, "We could put on
the orchestral version of 'Geneve'."

In case the fans thought
that I deserved a second chance.

["Geneve" plays]

Richard Holgarth produced some tracks.

And an old mate Barry Upton got in touch

and offered to produce
some tracks as well.

It was obvious to me that the reason
for his one-hit-wonder status

was the lack of production value.

So, I called him after a gig on
the Isle of Wight and told him bluntly,

"Your records are crap.
Now, let me have a go."

It's impossible to exaggerate
the difference between the two producers.

[rock music plays]

[John] Now, here we have Richard Holgarth,
right?

A serious musician who's working
with Eddie and the Hot Rods.

And Barry Upton,
who's not very much a pop producer,

who's probably most famous for writing

and producing five,
six to seven, eight for Steps.

[laughs]

It's fair to say they were a little,
you know, incompatible, really.

John went down to do some demos
with Barry Upton,

and the first time he came back

I said, "Let's have a listen."
He sat in my office.

And I went,
"Well, that's it. That's the hit."

It was just obvious.

It was brilliant. The demos are fantastic.

I couldn't believe how fast this guy's
working and turn things out.

It was sheer genius.

Then, we had to sell it to the band.

[laughs]

Seymour threatened to leave the band
if "Beware of the Flowers" won it.

Now, this is a new version
that I'd done a bit, a disco version.

And the bass just goes…
[imitates upbeat bass tune]

Like this.
He said, "If that wins, I'm out."

"I'm not playing that
for the rest of my career with Otway."

♪ Beware of the flowers
Beware of the flowers ♪

♪ Beware of the flowers ♪

♪ They're coming' to get you ♪

♪ Look out, baby
Look out, pet ♪

♪ Here's the kid
Who's gonna get the blues ♪

♪ When you go away ♪

[John] We actually had this big party,
right?

For the night, we were going to announce
what the hit was actually going to be.

Well, we had the guy
from the Electoral Reform Society

come down,
and tell us what the results were,

and he would come on stage
after we played each song.

And if it had enough votes,
he would tell us that it was…

-A potential hit.
-[all cheering]

[John] And if it didn't have enough votes,

he would tell us how many votes it got.

-Thirteen votes.
-[crowd clamours]

[John]And we had two girls,
Miss Hit and Miss Miss.

Come, we couldn't call her
"Miss Flop", could we?[laughs]

[crowd cheering, clamouring]

[John] And after each announcement,

either Miss Hit or Miss Miss
would take the sign for the song

to the relevant side of the stage.

[host speaking indistinctly]

[John] But what started happening
throughout the evening was

all the stuff on the hit side
of the stage was all the pop stuff

produced by Barry Upton.

And on my flop side of the stage

was the big orchestra version of "Geneve",
and everything else.

Voting night was quite tense
for those of us that were involved in it

especially myself, I had a bit
of reputation to keep up as a producer.

So, I just hope that
I was gonna be on the hit side.

Luckily, four out of five
of my productions were on the hit side.

I was okay.

It was very worrying for Seymour.

You know, 'cause when we done the disco
version of "Beware of the Flowers",

off it went to the hit side of the stage.

[John] Then, Jamie Lee Grace came on
to announce the hit.

Thank you.

I'm absolutely honoured and privileged

to be able to be the person
to announce the hit.

-[audience clamours]
-[Jenny] Oh!

[John] It was scary

'cause if "Beware of The Flowers" had won,
Seymour will be leaving the band.

It could barely be the same, so…

-Number two!
-[firecracker explodes]

"Beware of The Flowers", with 345 points.

[all cheering]

I thought we go up the listings?
Are we ready?

-[all cheering]
-[shouts] Number one!

-[firecracker explodes]
-With 378 points…

-"Bunsen Burner"!
-[all cheering]

["Bunsen Burner" by John Otway playing]

♪ It's a molecular structure of new DNA ♪

♪ It's basic organic chemistry ♪

♪ I'm an Alchemist baby ♪

♪ I can turn heavy metal into gold ♪

♪ I can make unstable compounds
Of mercury explode ♪

♪ I can make you glow ♪

♪ I can make you phosphoresce ♪

♪ I can burst your bubble ♪

♪ I can make you effervesce ♪

♪ Science tells you love
A chemical reaction in the brain ♪

♪ So let me be your Bunsen burner, baby
Let me be your naked flame ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your Bunsen burner ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your naked flame ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your Bunsen burner ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your naked flame ♪

♪ You're going to turn bright red ♪

♪ When I do my litmus test on you ♪

♪ Acid it was, acid it is ♪

♪ And what acid was true ♪

I remember the time when
"Bunsen Burner" first came to be, uh…

We're also singing in the car and, um…

I was telling dad about this chemistry
homework

that we've been set by Miss Inbanafo.

Um, we had to write this piece
on a Bunsen burner.

And I remembered dad suddenly put on
this stupid Elvis Presley impression voice

and started going,
"Hey, hey, I'm a Bunsen burner."

And I told him, "Stop being silly."

And, um… [laughs]

When Barry Upton came around
to talk with dad about the hit, uh…

dad brought out this
Bunsen burner things he'd reckon.

Yeah, I went for the song-writing
brain-storming session in his kitchen.

He recited this poem down
for his daughter's homework

and I actually thought,
"Hey, this sounds like a hit."

Well, at that time, the Sugarbabes
had nicked a riff off of Gary Numan

and it as all over the radio.

I thought, "Maybe we could do
the same thing with a disco classic."

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your naked flame ♪

[John] We've got a hit,
so we're gonna get it into the charts.

Four thousand fans
went to Royal Albert Hall,

and I knew at least as twice
as many of them wanted to attend.

We were doing
three different versions of it.

At that time, you could do
three different mixes

and put different B-sides on.

So I thought, ten thousand fans
bought the three versions.

Thirty thousand sales, we should
be able to have a Top Ten new record.

The problem is,
if you wanna sell your 30,000 records,

you're gonna sell them all in one week

so you need to get
three times that amount in the shops.

Now, you gotta remember
this is pre-iTunes.

Downloads didn't count for the charts.

Amazon Online didn't count either.

So basically, it's gonna cost you
a hundred thousand pounds

to start with to get into the charts.

Most independent records,
actually fell on that hurdle

because that is a huge
amount of money to find.

No one would be able to do it.

Had it not been for two big fans
Andy Wood and Andy Paine

who came in and offered
to fund the whole project,

which meant all we needed then was
a distributor to get them into the shops.

I knew him, really.

A good one from my appalling old days,
a chap called Nigel Reveler.

Nigel Reveler. Great character.
Great distributor.

Great party animal.

Chris and Nigel, together,
had had a number one hit

with Prince's "The Most Beautiful Girl
In The World".

I go, "Well, they must know what they're
doing."

"You know, they're the ones to go in."

He basically said to John,

"Call Nigel, if he's got stomach for it,
then we might get a hit."

Well, I did have a stomach for it
and I enjoy working with John

and I like a good sense of humour.

And he got the backers.

So I said, "To hell, let's go.
Let's have a crack at it, you know."

I remember Nigel Reveler saying to me,

at one point, "Cor, you've got top 20.
What else do you want?"

And I thought, "Well, Top Ten." [laughs]

Yeah, I think I did fair,
might get you top 20, but top 10…

Unless we get Willy,
so Entertainment UK involved.

Before the internet, you had to get
your record into the supermarkets

because they had 62 percent of the charts.

There was a big company called EUK

who used to buy for Woolworths
and Asda, who were the other supermarkets.

So it was absolutely vital
to get them on board,

to get records stocked in their stores.

They wouldn't stock it at all

so it was half the music business
was really cut out.

But I think in John's case,
the weakness was…

that since "Cor Baby, That's Really Free"
and records from the late 70s,

um, there weren't many buyers
who were around in the '70s,

who are around in the '90s.

We setup a great campaign for John Otway

and you'd get the proverbial, "Who?"

Because they control the charts,

they were deciding whether or not
I could have a hit for my 50th birthday.

And they decided I couldn't.

And I thought, "That's not fair."

I mean, I hated that idea
and the fans hated it even more.

And I decided it was a battle.
I mean, it was war.

And retail was our enemy.

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your Bunsen burner ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your naked flame ♪

[Ali] The hit basically
came out of the one list.

And it, basically,
they split this into sort of groups,

squads, around the country.

And we all had to go out there
and promote, um, "Bunsen Burner".

And it was fantastic
because these Otway people,

I mean, the fairly normal, really nice
decent people, you know, um…

Not really up to causing a fuss
and what have you,

but suddenly we became the--
we were fighting the whole music industry.

So we started off a military campaign.

The idea was we had to get
the 30,000 records

through the shops that would sell it
in one week

so we could get our Top Ten hit.

[John] First day of release.
We did the show in Sheffield.

And the show finished at midnight.

And what we did when the show finished,

we took the whole audience
out of the venue,

down the road, down the corner
to the local HMV,

and got them to buy copies
of "Bunsen Burner".

Starting last night
with a shop opening at midnight,

which is very nice because it meant
that five to nine this morning

I was number one in the charts

because nobody has sold any records
up to that point.

Yes, hit. Hit. [laughs]

[John] Next stop, Aylesbury, my hometown,

where I was to do a Monday lunch time
record signing.

The great thing about record signings was

you could make sure
that the shops had enough stock

'cause you could take the stock with you
and fill up the shelves for them.

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[man] Could you sign both of your hits
for me, please?

-Oh, wow, the first…
-[man] Yes.

-A vintage copy.
-That's the first hit.

That's the second.

[laughs] This two… That's two hits.

[John] And because they thought
I was gonna have two hits,

the local railway company
actually gave me my own train,

The Otway Hit Express.

Yes. It's that word I like the best.

[John]I was so me and my fans
could travel to London in style.

[man] Ladies and gentlemen,
this is The John Otway Hit Express

to London, Marylebone.

[guitar playing]

-Well, there is.
-[all] Was!

-[John] A house.
-[all] Where?

[crowd cheering, applauding]

[John] And when we got there,
it was really sweet.

Because two of my fans,
Billy and Catherine got engaged

at Marylebone Station in front
of the television cameras, the TV news.

I said when Otway has a second hit,
we'll get married.

And I thought there wasn't a chance
in hell of it happening.

It's plainly obvious now
Otway gonna have the second hit.

-So Katherine, will you marry me?
-Yes, I will.

-[laughs]
-[all cheering]

[Richard] We then did Virgin Mega Store
in the afternoon

which was packed, and sold hundreds more.

So soon we were number one
at the beginning of the week.

After a long day,
we went down the pub to celebrate.

And I was talking with a guy
called Steve Barker, actually.

I remember looking up at the TV and seeing

the thing we done in London tonight
at seven o'clock.

Suddenly, appearing again, I said,

"They're showing the London tonight
piece again."

And Steve said to me,
"That's News at Ten."

And sure enough, there was Trevor
McDonald in the "And Finally".

And I thought, "Blimey, we made the News
at Ten on Monday night."

[John] But we had a big, big problem.

With only having that amount of, um,
coverages on the stores…

[John] In order to stay in the Top Ten,

we needed to sell pretty much every single
copy that was in every shop in the UK.

And Johnnie Walker was aware
of what was happening.

He'd said he would go on national radio

and back us up and say we were being
prevented from having a hit.

He was really on our side,
which was great.

Of all the worst,
wouldn't start the record.

And I remember going on air
doing a bit of number about that.

In those days, you couldn't just sell
5,000 records in one town

because it would be considered hyping
by the chart authorities.

And so gradually, over the years,
they increase the security of the chart.

[John] I remember chatting to the guy
from the chart company.

And he said that
this amazing piece of software

that show when people are trying
to cheat and hype the charts.

He said usually big sale of records
in one shop,

and then a few minutes later, a big sale
in another shop just down the road.

-And alarm bells rang.
-[alarm beeping]

But our record was completely different.

Our big sales were all over the place.

It was like election night.

You know, we're now going over
to Bradford East.

And it was kinda like
we're not going to Chelmsford HMV.

Three copies left in this shop, at the top
of Church Road or what have you.

And everybody was just scouring
every shop in town.

These messages just kept coming in on
the internet on this ONElist all the time.

Saying, "Look, there's four left
in Bromsgrove Central or something."

Um, "I bought 45 copies
of the bloody thing that sell it."

And everybody just bought into this.
And we were watching, saying,

"I just bought another ten in Chelmsford."
"I just bought five in Brighton."

"Six in East Sussex somewhere."

It was fantastic, it was like a wildfire
just out of control.

[John] I knew something really exciting
was happening.

'Cause the morning the chart came out,

there was a BBC van, you know,
parked outside of the house.

I was always avoiding, you know,
showing Amy the trappings of stardom

but that morning, I couldn't resist.

[John] There you are. Look.

So it's all inspired
by my chemistry homework.

[John] And Helen was saying lots and lots
of famous people have sat on there.

[Helen] Yeah, we've had lots of bums
on there.

-[gasps] Oh.
-[John] Yes, go on.

[Helen laughs]

[Paul] It's, I don't know,
6:30 outside the Palladium

and the fans are all listening
to the chart countdown.

And it's not in the top 30.

And you can just sense this whole kind
of atmosphere of concern and worry.

And then it's not in the top 20.

And Otway's gone outside
with the transistor radio.

[crowd cheering]

And it's not number 11.
And it's not number ten.

Straight in at number nine.
Outside the Palladium went berserk.

Nobody cared
what the rest of the chart was.

They all loaded into the Palladium.

And, hey, we had a brilliant gig
that night.

I remember that great night
at The London Palladium.

I mean, the last time
there was such excitement there

was when the Beatles were on

and John Lennon said, "I want all you
at the back to clap your hands,

and everybody down the front,
you just rattle your jewellery."

[John] What an incredible night.

I remember talking to somebody
from the chart company, and they told me,

"No fan base had ever managed
to get a record that high in charts

without the help
of the major record retail."

Unbelievably.

The fans had pretty much got their hands
on every single record that was out there.

Brilliant.

On number 12, never really did mind her.

[audience cheering]

Number 11-- I don't know who that is.

[audience cheering]

Number ten, another pile of rubbish.

[audience cheering]

-And…
-[audience cheering]

At number nine…

[audience cheering]

[man] John Otway!

And the song called "Bunsen Burner"!

[man] Here is our Top Ten…

[Nigel] He had the power to move
those fans into the shops.

which was great.

And he got a number nine record.
Amazing, really.

I wouldn't have put money on it,
but there you go. [laughs]

Now, has this bloke got fans or what?

They chose a single, they marketed it,

and they bought it enough to make it go
to number nine.

Twenty-five years after "Really Free",
welcome back to John Otway!

[audience cheering]

There's a rare isotope of hydrogen
that gets us into heavy water.

["Bunsen Burner" by John Otway playing]

♪ It's a molecular structure of new DNA ♪

♪ It's basic organic chemistry ♪

[John] Well, what about Woolworth refusing
to stock a Top Ten hit record?

If we hadn't have Willies, I think,
I mean, and if maybe they had…

As I said, that's normally worth
another ten places

so going at number nine,
we would've gone in at minus one.

And our group basically felt
that they had control of the charts.

And if they didn't have complete control
of the charts,

if you had managed to get a hit record
past them,

you wouldn't complain
to the media about it

because you want them
to take your next record.

But I was in a different situation.
I hadn't had a hit for 25 years.

And I was unlikely to have another hit
for another 25 years.

And I wanted all the publicity,
you know, I could get.

So I did complain to the media.

And, um, it was great. Look at this.

Earlier this week,

we reported on the return
of cult music hero John Otway

to the charts after 25 years
in the wilderness.

Well, today the success was sad when he
discovered that having a Top Ten record

doesn't necessarily mean
all shops will stock it.

They say he's not cool enough.
Here, Gordon reports.

♪ Let me be your Bunsen burner ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

♪ Let me be your naked flame ♪

♪ Burn, baby, burn ♪

[reporter] "Bunsen Burner" has shocked
the industry by reaching number nine.

But walk into Willies or WH Smiths or Asda
and it's not their number nine.

They refuse to stock a joke single
from a bald 50-year-old.

Our cool customers
are 11 and 12-year-old girls.

Love Gareth Gates.
They love Will, they love Robin Williams.

But I'm afraid, they don't have
a particular keenness for John's single.

And this is going on
past buying experience.

This is why Woolworths went bloody bust.

They wouldn't stock "Bunsen Burner".
It deserves a bloody rate.

And we suddenly reaping huge amounts
of publicity. It was amazing.

They were interviewing the buyer
at Woolworths about "ageism"

on the Channel 4 News.

It's broken through into the Top Ten.
It's in number nine.

Well, how it works is,
like all, um, retailers,

we could offer the singles
about two months

before they actually put
on January release

so we made a commercial decision about it
two months ago.

Because, of course, the Woolworths' chart
what was on the wall

was that they decided weeks and weeks
before it would be in the chart.

It has nothing to do with actual sales.
It was stitched up.

Um, but, that had to end.
They ended up supporting the Pepsi Chart.

Cost them one and a half million pounds.

They went bust about
three to four years later, I believe.

I remember playing "Bunsen Burner"
on radio 2 and then I think,

"What a brilliant record it was, you know.

Not only the great chorus of,
"Burn, baby, burn"…

And then I think there's some
dreadful fire with fatalities.

Typical Otway's luck.

So then the memo went on radio 2,
"You cannot play 'Bunsen Burner'"

with the chorus of "burn, baby, burn,"
you know.

And it's just like, you know,
the universe has conspired against John.

Which has been good
for his character building.

And it just means he's got to try that
little bit harder.

So with the Rage Against The Machine idea

that really stemmed from same what Otway
did with the "Bunsen Burner" campaign

and how successful that was.

Because to get a Top Ten hit, uh,

in the way-- in the fashion
that that was done was brilliant.

I thought it was a fantastic idea.

And, yeah, it was definitely part
inspiration for me getting my finger out

and trying to see if the
Rage Against Machine campaign will work.

And, um, I'm eternally thankful for it.

Now, what I want in my sixth formers
to understand was

if you get a bit of success like that,
don't let it go to your head.

Now, all people don't understand
what going into your head means.

But it doesn't mean that, you know,

you become a horrid person
or something like that.

It just means you sometimes get ideas
that are possibly a bit too ambitious.

John phone up and said,
"I've got an idea."

"I want you to come down to London."

And he wants to announce something to us.

[chuckles] We were indeed.
We were summoned.

All the way from Newcastle
I was summoned, yeah.

At Otway's behest.

We went down to a pub in Putney,
and he got out a rather small globe.

[John] I remember lying in bed one morning
and thinking , "Now I've cracked the UK."

"What's next?"

Then I had a brainwave.
The 2006 World Tour."

[rock music playing]

[John] I liked it,
wouldn't it be a good idea

that if we took our own plane?

'Cause I know when Led Zeppelin went
on tour they took their own plane.

I thought at that time I was as big

as Led Zeppelin or The Rolling Stones.

And I thought we could have our own jet

and we could fly around the world
with our fans in it.

So I asked Ali to find out
how much a jet would cost.

It was quite expensive.

You know, some 900,000 pounds.

[record screeches]

I know 900,000 pounds
sounds like a lot of money.

Which, I mean, it is.

But I thought if you take 300 pounds,
that's only 3,000 pounds each.

This was my main objection to it.

And to get 300 people paying 3,000 pounds
is a hell of an undertaking.

[Ali] But after a few drinks,
all those inhibitions just disappeared.

So I think by the time we had the fifth
or sixth pint, we were in Hawaii.

We were all onboard and it's just that
bloody Otway enthusiasm isn't it?

It gets the best of…

the most prudent minds, I guess it is.

Um, you do just get carried away.

Feverishly excited, grabbing this globe
and pointing to…

"We'll go here, we'll go here,
we'll go here."

[John] You could have
air-stewardesses in Ot Air uniforms.

And you get your own check-in desks.

So I started putting a tour together
in my head.

What a great tour it was.

[lively music playing]

[woman] Will any passengers
from Ot-Air Flight 2006.

♪ Please report at the check-in desk
We're going to be travelling west ♪

♪ Going across the north Atlantic
The USA, and the Pacific ♪

♪ Gonna fly across Eurasia
And back to Europe, via Asia ♪

♪ Make your way to the departure gate
We're gonna circumnavigate ♪

This magnificent trip around the world
involving playing Carnegie Hall,

playing Sydney Opera House,
playing Whiskey A Go-Go somewhere in LA.

And it just became
more and more fantastic.

Otway.

So I phoned up Sydney Opera House
and asked them

if any of their smaller theatres
were available for the tour.

And they weren't.

However, the big concert hall, you know,
the one that host ten jet-loads of people,

that was available.

Okay, so you pay the deposit
of 10,000 pounds

for this Sydney Opera House gig.

How much is the gig? I don't know.
I just paid the deposit.

[chuckles] I said, "But, is it 50,000
pounds? I mean, what are you doing?"

It was quite expensive.

But not in comparison
to price of a jet expensive.

So we could do that.

And hotels on the side,
but I remember checking out

the most luxurious hotel in the world.

[John]Normally,
if you're going on a tour,

you won't be able to stay
somewhere like that.

As I said,
compared to the price of the jet,

I mean, this seemed quite reasonable.

[Richard] I must've had to cringe
a little bit

and I thought, well, it's feasible, yes,
but it's a lot of money.

You're looking at a million quid,

and we haven't really done
anything that big. [laughs]

[John] And it turns out,
2006 we were going,

there's gonna be
a total eclipse of the sun.

And it was great.

And even if it was cloudy,
it didn't matter.

We could go to a pub back into the jet
right above the clouds

and, you know, catch the eclipse anyway.

[Paul] And the two of them,
Otway and Cotton embark on a pub tour

where they go around pubs with a little
plastic model of a jumbo jet

with Ot-Air written on it.

Um, and talked excitedly about
the world tour to the handful of fans

that come along to see the two twats.

It's interesting, you know.

When you get up on the stars
and you tell 'em you got your own jet,

and you're flying around the world,
you're doing Sydney Opera House,

yeah, they're pretty impressed.

I remember Glen Telvil was from Squeeze

and he offered to come along
on the tour and do some numbers.

[John] And so did Steve Harley,
and he got a number one hit record.

-[upbeat disco music play]
-And The Cheeky Girls.

Barry Upton was actually producing
the Cheeky Flamenco for the Cheeky Girls.

And they agreed to do
the Las Vegas Cabaret Show.

The Cheeky Girls.

Oh, I thought it'd be lovely was we could
actually finish the tour here in Geneva.

And that'd be great.

'Cause there's a boat that goes right
across the lake comes in from Montrose.

And I thought we could have
a string quartet on the boat,

and as we came in to Geneva harbour,

they could actually play the song
and I could sing.

That'd be lovely.

♪ Geneva ♪

We've got to about 150 people signed up.

But it didn't really go much further
from that.

Everything else John has ever done
was inclusive.

So all the fans, if they wanted to,
could join in.

For the world tour, financially, um,

prohibited most fans
from being able to play.

It was too expensive.

And I said, "John, look,
I really don't think we should carry on

because you're gonna have
to put a plane deposit down

very soon, for at least 50,000 pounds."

"And I haven't got the money,
and we can't use the client money."

"So, I don't see
how we can actually take this risk."

"Um, they're not gonna let us carry on
without putting deposit on the plane."

So I said I wanna quit
and I think we should wind it up.

Now, you've hired an air bus, an… an A34C…

-…quite a big plane.
-Yeah.

Uh, how many seats are being bought?

-Uh, we got just over half the jet load.
-Really?

-Yes. I'm confident enough--
-That's family. [laughs]

I'm confident enough to put, um,
put the deposit down on the jet today.

-So we definitely--
-You put the deposit down today?

-How much was that?
-60,000 pounds.

Good grief. You are bonkers.

But what happens
if you don't fill the plane?

You're gonna lose an awful lot of money.
It is a massive risk, isn't it?

No, there are, trust me, there are people

who have the same rock n' roll dreams
that do out there.

Right.

[John] Yes, right. The press loved
the idea of the world tour.

This is the word, "I'm Otway, fly me."

The Independent. The Daily Telegraph.

And The Sunday Independent magazine.

Five whole pages.

And the front cover.

Even Viz magazine
had something to say about it.

[Chris] Um, complete load of shite it was.

And the public recognise that
despite all the promotion we could do.

So basically, if something shit,

we can't help it by promoting it
in the coming.

It's a recipe for disaster.

You know it's not gonna work.

The world tour did not stand a chance.

♪ Dreams that perish by morning ♪

♪ Before they see the light of day ♪

♪ Great flashes of inspiration ♪

♪ When you just get carried away ♪

In hindsight,
I suppose I should've stopped

when Richard Cotton told me to stop,

but people love the idea
of the world tour.

I kept talking to fans at gigs
and telling them about it.

And they thought, "Wow,
what a great idea. What a great tour."

They can't come,
but they thought it was wonderful.

But they did seem, a limit to the amount
of people that could come.

And that seemed just under the amount
that made the tour viable.

But, um…

So I'm not quite sure
what I've got to say, um…

I'm not quite sure if I'm supposed to say.

There wasn't enough people
so the tour collapsed.

Or, we nearly made the world tour.

Um…

Or, it was so close but…

Close wasn't really good enough
for the investors.

And it wasn't good enough for the people
who were gonna get married on the tour.

And it wasn't close enough
to get my investment back or…

anybody else that invested
in the Ot-Air jet.

Their money back.

We tried to do our best
to salvage the tour.

We really salvaged the date
at The Cavern in Liverpool.

And, then, Glen Toblum did it.
It was sweet of him.

He came and sang "Leaving on A Jet Plane".

Might it seemed funny now,
but it was heart-breaking at that time.

-Alright, I won't, then.
-[laughter]

[John] One thing I hope my sixth formers
have learned from me is

you don't let a cock-up, not even
a really big cock-up, set you back.

You make the most of it.

So I phoned Paul Cerenhugh,

Chris France, Ali,
Nigel Reveler, and Richard Cotton.

I said, "Look, I got this
really great idea."

A bloody movie.

Well, it started off
as a simple enough idea.

I did end up the whole footage.

And I showed Adam the drummer.

And he said, "Tell you what,
why not book a cinema?"

Loads of fans would actually enjoy
watching that on the big screen.

So I went away and thought about it,
and I thought,

"Hang on, I've got lots of footage."

I mean, tons of it.

I mean, every time I've done something
I thought was quite clever,

I made sure somebody had a camera
following me.

So I thought, "Why not make
Otway: the Movie?"

For my 50th birthday.

And a hit for my 60th.

We could have a movie.

So I slept on it.

[laughs] It actually wasn't
a very good idea

because by the time I woke up,
I was thinking,

where do they premiere things like,

the big Harry Potter films
or the James Bond films?

And it turns out,
it's the Odeon Leicester Square,

the biggest cinema in the country.

So I went down to check it out.

The first thing I noticed
was this balcony.

I went up and looked down and I thought,

"I could wave to the fans
turning up to my premiere from here."

And I went downstairs to have a look
at where I would be waving from.

And then this great poster.

And I thought, you can't wave
in front of somebody else's poster,

and with Odeon.

Look, you can actually just change
the four letters to make it spell "Otway".

I know a lot of people are thinking a lot
of my ideas for Otway: The Movie

were getting a bit ambitious.

[laughs] They just kept coming.

I know over a couple pints
when my mates said,

"This movie's probably gonna be
the biggest thing in your career so far."

"So why not make that
the end of the film?"

"Just film yourself arriving on the red
carpet and all the fans,

and you're waving and things."

"And get the director to edit it up."

"And get him to tack it all
the end of the film

while the audience are watching the film!"

[chuckles] That would work, wouldn't it?

There I was, sat in the dark watching.

Soon it went all black.

And out of the darkness…

["We Rock" by John Otway plays]

♪ These are rights of passage ♪

♪ These ugly days ♪

♪ Everything's changing in so many ways ♪

♪ From the listed building
And from the tower of love ♪

[audience cheering]

♪ We hear the same two words ♪

♪ We are rock ♪

♪ We are rock ♪

♪ We are rock ♪

♪ We are rock ♪

♪ We are rock ♪

[crowd chanting]

[crowd continues chanting]

[John] All these people
are buying the tickets

so that we can actually make the movie.

They're not just cinema goers, are they?
They're producers.

And I thought it would be nice,

they're sort of sitting there
and at the end of the film,

up comes all their names as producers.

And if you're an Otway fan,

you'd love that, wouldn't you?

["Poetry And Jazz" by John Otway playing]

♪ She said it's hard for me
To explain to you ♪

♪ The brightness of the light ♪

♪ I can still remember
When my life was like that ♪

♪ A real and painless beauty
I remember as a kid ♪

♪ When I thought that I knew everything
And in a way I did ♪

♪ She was a virgin then
A child in a million ♪

♪ With deep round hazel eyes
Of blazing intuition ♪

♪ She called me over to her side
And said, Will you please listen ♪

♪ I wanna show you something
And it's something I've just written ♪

♪ And I'm calling it Poetry and Jazz ♪

♪ She watched her happy family turn
To a broken home ♪

♪ Her father left with someone else
Her mother on her own ♪

♪ Her fourteenth birthday
Her mother spent in tears ♪

♪ She celebrated on her own
Her adolescent years ♪

♪ It was hell then
Caught in the crossfire ♪

♪ Of an emotional triangle
She couldn't keep together ♪

♪ I heard her softly
A she sobbed upon my shoulder ♪

♪ Saying As you are the closest thing
I've got to a brother ♪

♪ Explain to me why is life so sad ♪

♪ Sixteen was better
'Cause sixteen was boys ♪

♪ Make-up parties alcohol and clothes ♪

♪ And saying to your boyfriend
Come on get out of bed ♪

♪ Look, its three o clock in the afternoon
And my mother's coming back ♪

♪ And she smiled then
Her eyes filled with laughter ♪

♪ She didn't know if it was love
But it didn't really matter ♪

♪ She called me on the phone and said
Hey, get this big brother ♪

♪ I just got rid of one boyfriend
And got myself another ♪

♪ And listen, this one drives a Jag ♪

[music fades]