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1
00:00:01,045 --> 00:00:04,118
I don't know about you, but I'm
the kind of person that can get
2
00:00:04,151 --> 00:00:07,492
99 positive comments and
then 40,000 negative ones
3
00:00:07,526 --> 00:00:09,061
and only focus on those.
4
00:00:10,532 --> 00:00:12,234
Why are we like that?
5
00:00:12,268 --> 00:00:14,506
[music]
6
00:00:17,311 --> 00:00:18,581
This is The Premise.
7
00:00:18,614 --> 00:00:23,023
I hope you enjoy it and if not,
I'm sure you'll know what to do.
8
00:00:23,791 --> 00:00:26,229
This is, "The Commenter."
9
00:00:26,664 --> 00:00:29,101
[music]
10
00:00:42,428 --> 00:00:44,633
[birds chirping]
11
00:00:44,866 --> 00:00:47,438
You're exactly where
you're supposed to be.
12
00:00:55,688 --> 00:00:57,291
Keep your eyes closed...
13
00:00:58,326 --> 00:01:00,598
and focus on your breath.
14
00:01:02,167 --> 00:01:03,838
No other thoughts
enter your mind.
15
00:01:03,871 --> 00:01:05,140
[dog barking]
16
00:01:06,242 --> 00:01:10,050
The only sound you hear is
the sound of your breath.
17
00:01:11,319 --> 00:01:12,388
Breathe‐‐
18
00:01:14,626 --> 00:01:16,262
in for four,
19
00:01:16,296 --> 00:01:17,532
[wind chimes]
20
00:01:21,439 --> 00:01:23,678
out for four,
21
00:01:24,345 --> 00:01:26,282
and that's all you have to do.
22
00:01:27,752 --> 00:01:30,725
That's all you ever have to do.
23
00:01:31,527 --> 00:01:33,063
Now take your time.
24
00:01:33,798 --> 00:01:36,604
And when you're
ready, open your eyes.
25
00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:43,618
Congratulate yourself on a
meaningful practice today.
26
00:01:44,218 --> 00:01:45,354
Namaste.
27
00:01:47,391 --> 00:01:50,364
If you enjoyed your practice
please follow me on Instagram
28
00:01:50,397 --> 00:01:54,171
at craft your morning
with a sip of yoga.
29
00:01:54,205 --> 00:01:55,205
[camera sound]
30
00:01:55,340 --> 00:01:56,510
Bang bang.
31
00:01:56,543 --> 00:01:57,812
[laughs]
32
00:01:58,246 --> 00:01:59,549
Hey, what are you doing?
33
00:01:59,583 --> 00:02:01,452
I'm teaching Bear to play dead.
34
00:02:01,486 --> 00:02:02,486
Bang, bang.
35
00:02:06,229 --> 00:02:08,567
Yay. Good Bear!
36
00:02:08,601 --> 00:02:09,903
With bang bang, Bear.
37
00:02:09,936 --> 00:02:11,105
[laughs]
38
00:02:12,241 --> 00:02:13,310
Seriously?
39
00:02:14,378 --> 00:02:18,654
Why are steel‐cut oats
healthier than other oats?
40
00:02:18,921 --> 00:02:20,658
I mean, how do
the oats even know
41
00:02:20,692 --> 00:02:21,927
what they're being cut with?
42
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:23,564
I don't know, but I
think you're funny.
43
00:02:23,597 --> 00:02:24,465
[chuckles]
44
00:02:24,499 --> 00:02:26,469
But for real, what
is the difference?
45
00:02:26,503 --> 00:02:27,503
Mm‐hmm.
46
00:02:30,678 --> 00:02:32,481
What's this?
47
00:02:32,882 --> 00:02:34,285
[chuckles]
48
00:02:34,318 --> 00:02:35,722
Steel‐cut toast.
49
00:02:35,755 --> 00:02:38,159
Because you are‐‐
50
00:02:38,460 --> 00:02:41,734
Miss Generational Inspiration
and you deserve to be
51
00:02:41,967 --> 00:02:43,771
celebrating yourself
and who you are.
52
00:02:43,804 --> 00:02:45,307
‐ No, no, no. ‐ Absolutely...
53
00:02:45,340 --> 00:02:47,579
‐ Every single day. ‐ I'm
so gross and sweaty now.
54
00:02:47,612 --> 00:02:49,248
Oh, it's not even a real award.
55
00:02:49,281 --> 00:02:51,185
They just gave it to
me for fundraising.
56
00:02:51,219 --> 00:02:51,820
Shhh...
57
00:02:51,854 --> 00:02:53,657
Can't I just love you?
58
00:02:53,691 --> 00:02:59,368
Just listen to your toast,
you are the fucking best.
59
00:02:59,402 --> 00:03:00,437
[laughs]
60
00:03:01,874 --> 00:03:03,911
I will see you tonight
with the girls, okay?
61
00:03:03,944 --> 00:03:04,746
Okay.
62
00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:07,752
You go change some lives.
63
00:03:08,253 --> 00:03:09,355
Have a good day.
64
00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:11,927
Bye. I love you.
65
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,229
Je t'aime...
66
00:03:14,331 --> 00:03:15,902
All right, listen up ladies.
67
00:03:16,870 --> 00:03:20,210
I want you to close
your eyes because
68
00:03:20,678 --> 00:03:22,347
I'm about to blow your minds.
69
00:03:23,551 --> 00:03:26,189
Now keep your eyes closed...
70
00:03:26,389 --> 00:03:27,389
[laughs]
71
00:03:28,126 --> 00:03:31,365
and I want you to try
and scare yourself.
72
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:33,938
Come on try.
73
00:03:34,539 --> 00:03:35,575
[chuckles]
74
00:03:36,543 --> 00:03:39,448
See, being scared of
yourself makes no sense.
75
00:03:39,482 --> 00:03:42,555
You just have to listen
to your inner voice.
76
00:03:42,989 --> 00:03:45,394
Now, when you write
this week's exercise,
77
00:03:45,427 --> 00:03:46,930
I want you to remember that
78
00:03:46,964 --> 00:03:49,301
there is no such
thing as perfect.
79
00:03:50,003 --> 00:03:52,274
There is only perfectly you.
80
00:03:52,474 --> 00:03:54,513
Let's show our appreciation.
81
00:03:54,546 --> 00:03:55,581
Huh?!
82
00:03:55,615 --> 00:03:58,721
We show! (clap) our!
(clap) great appreciation!
83
00:03:58,754 --> 00:04:02,327
For the heroes! (clap) who
help! Our strength in education!
84
00:04:02,361 --> 00:04:02,996
[camera sound]
85
00:04:03,029 --> 00:04:04,031
[applause]
86
00:04:04,064 --> 00:04:06,369
[music]
87
00:04:09,008 --> 00:04:11,613
[notification sounds]
88
00:04:28,848 --> 00:04:29,649
To Cleo.
89
00:04:29,850 --> 00:04:31,486
[applause]
90
00:04:32,087 --> 00:04:34,291
Also, to Naomi for
getting into her
91
00:04:34,325 --> 00:04:36,429
first choice medical school.
92
00:04:36,462 --> 00:04:37,632
‐ Come on. ‐ Killing it!
93
00:04:37,665 --> 00:04:38,968
[applause]
94
00:04:39,870 --> 00:04:42,775
To Beth who spent all last
weekend giving checkups
95
00:04:42,809 --> 00:04:44,779
to rescue dogs, pro bono.
96
00:04:45,380 --> 00:04:46,984
[laughter]
97
00:04:47,451 --> 00:04:51,459
But, most importantly to my
beautiful girlfriend Allegra or
98
00:04:51,493 --> 00:04:54,766
shall I say, "Miss
Generational Inspiration."
99
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:56,570
[applause]
100
00:04:57,539 --> 00:04:59,976
Also, I got us a table at
the Arts Alliance gala,
101
00:05:00,010 --> 00:05:03,316
so we could go watch
Allegra accept her award.
102
00:05:04,418 --> 00:05:06,455
Who would I be without you guys?
103
00:05:06,489 --> 00:05:07,592
[laughter]
104
00:05:07,625 --> 00:05:08,494
Right.
105
00:05:08,527 --> 00:05:09,529
Okay, hang on.
106
00:05:09,563 --> 00:05:10,865
Smile like you mean it.
107
00:05:12,836 --> 00:05:13,771
[camera sound]
108
00:05:13,804 --> 00:05:15,006
[laughter]
109
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:16,677
Oh, I look terrible.
110
00:05:16,877 --> 00:05:17,912
You look great.
111
00:05:17,946 --> 00:05:19,014
[chuckles]
112
00:05:19,048 --> 00:05:20,551
I really want to go to the‐‐
113
00:05:20,585 --> 00:05:22,989
So, it's at the New
Orleans Jazz Museum.
114
00:05:23,022 --> 00:05:25,795
It's like creative
black tie or whatever,
115
00:05:25,828 --> 00:05:29,636
so no need to dress,
you know, any fancier.
116
00:05:29,669 --> 00:05:30,671
Okay, cool.
117
00:05:31,439 --> 00:05:34,411
[music]
118
00:05:39,956 --> 00:05:41,693
Hello.
119
00:05:42,996 --> 00:05:43,998
Ah, I'm so sorry.
120
00:05:44,031 --> 00:05:44,799
What?
121
00:05:44,833 --> 00:05:45,935
Oh, what.
122
00:05:46,570 --> 00:05:48,406
[crosstalk]
123
00:05:48,674 --> 00:05:50,678
We need to go...
124
00:05:50,711 --> 00:05:51,547
Avec toi?
125
00:05:51,580 --> 00:05:52,715
Where?
126
00:05:53,416 --> 00:05:55,821
[speaking French]
127
00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:57,133
[television] Take
it easy man, okay?
128
00:05:57,157 --> 00:06:01,600
What are you doing, that is not
his blood, that's so obvious.
129
00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:03,904
You're going to have to go
back to detective school
130
00:06:03,938 --> 00:06:05,575
young man.
131
00:06:05,608 --> 00:06:06,877
It's so dumb.
132
00:06:07,144 --> 00:06:08,479
Come on.
133
00:06:08,514 --> 00:06:09,716
What's happening?
134
00:06:09,749 --> 00:06:12,120
She's going to get it but her
partner is slowing her down,
135
00:06:12,154 --> 00:06:14,124
that's really annoying.
136
00:06:14,626 --> 00:06:16,663
What are you doing?
137
00:06:16,997 --> 00:06:18,801
Oh, no, come on.
138
00:06:19,502 --> 00:06:20,470
So, you saw it?
139
00:06:20,504 --> 00:06:21,138
Yes.
140
00:06:21,172 --> 00:06:23,009
Who do you think it is?
141
00:06:23,042 --> 00:06:24,144
Who cares, just block them.
142
00:06:24,178 --> 00:06:25,624
No, you're not
supposed to block them,
143
00:06:25,648 --> 00:06:27,685
that just stirs them up.
144
00:06:27,719 --> 00:06:29,589
Just ignore it then.
145
00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:33,497
You have the best smile.
146
00:06:34,699 --> 00:06:36,670
Sometimes I worry it's
like a grownup version
147
00:06:36,703 --> 00:06:38,473
of a school photo.
148
00:06:39,074 --> 00:06:40,043
[chuckles]
149
00:06:40,076 --> 00:06:41,647
It's perfect.
150
00:06:41,947 --> 00:06:44,018
I love that it's
a little crooked.
151
00:06:44,051 --> 00:06:45,487
It's my favorite.
152
00:06:45,521 --> 00:06:48,627
I hate that there are
these faceless weirdos on
153
00:06:48,661 --> 00:06:51,500
the internet that try to
ruin people's happiness.
154
00:06:52,969 --> 00:06:56,877
It's crazy, you have like 99
beautiful, positive comments
155
00:06:56,910 --> 00:07:00,818
and you choose to focus
on the one negative one.
156
00:07:01,118 --> 00:07:03,757
The one that's like,
stupid baloney.
157
00:07:04,593 --> 00:07:05,593
Don't do it.
158
00:07:06,462 --> 00:07:07,064
Thank you.
159
00:07:07,097 --> 00:07:08,634
I will protect you.
160
00:07:12,007 --> 00:07:13,176
Check my email.
161
00:07:13,209 --> 00:07:16,917
You have 22 unread
messages from Dermstore.
162
00:07:16,950 --> 00:07:18,954
Who gave you permission
to be this beautiful?
163
00:07:18,988 --> 00:07:19,889
Delete.
164
00:07:19,923 --> 00:07:23,664
From Ayanna M., I
love all these ideas.
165
00:07:24,499 --> 00:07:25,835
Mark as unread.
166
00:07:27,805 --> 00:07:29,475
Open those new messages for me.
167
00:07:29,709 --> 00:07:31,078
New text from Sarah,
168
00:07:31,112 --> 00:07:33,917
meeting Tinder girl
after dinner, eyes emoji.
169
00:07:34,118 --> 00:07:36,690
Sarah has changed the
name of the group to,
170
00:07:36,723 --> 00:07:39,094
excuse me, ma'am,
this is a Whataburger.
171
00:07:39,128 --> 00:07:40,130
[chuckles]
172
00:07:43,236 --> 00:07:44,873
Check those new comments.
173
00:07:45,206 --> 00:07:49,749
New comment from C101011,
posing with little black kids
174
00:07:49,783 --> 00:07:51,118
so everyone knows I'm a good‐‐
175
00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:52,655
Am I doing this right?
176
00:07:54,926 --> 00:07:58,099
These hashtags, is she
teaching them to write,
177
00:07:58,132 --> 00:07:59,536
or are they teaching her?
178
00:07:59,903 --> 00:08:01,740
[music]
179
00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:10,591
Hi.
180
00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:13,573
Excuse me, we have an
open‐door policy in this house.
181
00:08:13,597 --> 00:08:15,066
I just need one second, sorry.
182
00:08:15,100 --> 00:08:16,636
[music]
183
00:08:19,074 --> 00:08:20,110
[chuckles]
184
00:08:30,163 --> 00:08:31,700
That's a beautiful smile.
185
00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:34,271
You have a beautiful smile,
plus the light, oops...
186
00:08:34,939 --> 00:08:36,710
I like that one
from your account.
187
00:08:36,743 --> 00:08:38,814
‐ How do I unlike it? ‐
Oh, just tap it again.
188
00:08:40,350 --> 00:08:43,056
Isn't this supposed to be how
I feel about the comments,
189
00:08:43,089 --> 00:08:44,726
not whether you
think the comments
190
00:08:44,759 --> 00:08:45,795
are objectively right?
191
00:08:46,128 --> 00:08:47,999
How do you feel
about the comments?
192
00:08:48,199 --> 00:08:49,836
That they are objectively right.
193
00:08:49,869 --> 00:08:50,538
[chuckles]
194
00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:52,174
That's a thought, not a feeling.
195
00:08:52,207 --> 00:08:54,044
I feel...
196
00:08:54,078 --> 00:08:55,078
Um...
197
00:08:57,317 --> 00:08:58,317
seen‐‐
198
00:08:59,188 --> 00:09:00,290
and respected.
199
00:09:01,425 --> 00:09:04,599
You feel respected by these
comments, these comments?
200
00:09:04,833 --> 00:09:06,837
I feel like I'm being
taken seriously, yes.
201
00:09:08,239 --> 00:09:10,043
You have a loving partner.
202
00:09:10,076 --> 00:09:13,049
You have an incredible
supportive group of friends.
203
00:09:13,082 --> 00:09:16,188
You have all these students
that love and adore you,
204
00:09:16,656 --> 00:09:19,228
yet you feel that a random
stranger on the internet
205
00:09:19,261 --> 00:09:22,735
is the one person telling
you the truth about yourself?
206
00:09:23,637 --> 00:09:24,637
Yeah.
207
00:09:25,373 --> 00:09:28,146
Do you think you might be
too close to all of this?
208
00:09:28,179 --> 00:09:29,549
Sure, of course.
209
00:09:31,753 --> 00:09:32,822
But they're not.
210
00:09:34,391 --> 00:09:35,761
They're far from it, right?
211
00:09:35,795 --> 00:09:36,162
If they don't know me?
212
00:09:36,630 --> 00:09:37,698
Exactly.
213
00:09:37,732 --> 00:09:43,109
So, I'm too close to it and
they're too far from it.
214
00:09:43,142 --> 00:09:44,142
Correct.
215
00:09:44,913 --> 00:09:47,150
So, who am I supposed
to listen to?
216
00:09:47,184 --> 00:09:49,354
You listen to your heart.
217
00:09:49,823 --> 00:09:51,927
I am listening to my
heart but when I tell you
218
00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:53,129
what my heart is saying,
219
00:09:53,162 --> 00:09:54,732
you're telling me
that I'm wrong.
220
00:09:54,766 --> 00:09:55,768
[laughs]
221
00:09:55,801 --> 00:09:58,306
You don't know the
intentions of this source.
222
00:09:58,339 --> 00:09:59,809
Well, what if they're good?
223
00:09:59,843 --> 00:10:01,980
What if they're bad and
they're still right?
224
00:10:02,013 --> 00:10:04,051
People listen to
all kinds of things.
225
00:10:04,084 --> 00:10:06,723
Religion, horoscopes,
tarot cards.
226
00:10:06,756 --> 00:10:08,025
Nobody judges them.
227
00:10:08,059 --> 00:10:09,161
This speaks to me.
228
00:10:09,194 --> 00:10:10,764
Why can't I listen to it?
229
00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:14,171
I know you feel
you're struggling
230
00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:17,144
but you're doing
wonderful work here.
231
00:10:17,377 --> 00:10:19,716
And you're exactly
where you should be.
232
00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:24,759
Can I have my
phone back, please?
233
00:10:24,793 --> 00:10:27,164
[music]
234
00:11:08,379 --> 00:11:09,379
Hey!
235
00:11:09,816 --> 00:11:11,452
Ooh, wow, hello.
236
00:11:11,485 --> 00:11:14,024
Look at this runway model.
237
00:11:14,224 --> 00:11:15,360
It's not too much?
238
00:11:15,393 --> 00:11:16,930
No, we love.
239
00:11:16,963 --> 00:11:18,032
No, no, never.
240
00:11:18,065 --> 00:11:19,065
You look good.
241
00:11:20,470 --> 00:11:22,407
What would I do
without you guys?
242
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:23,242
Hi.
243
00:11:23,276 --> 00:11:24,278
Ah, girl.
244
00:11:25,313 --> 00:11:26,783
Do you really like it?
245
00:11:27,985 --> 00:11:31,192
Listen, you were perfect and
now, you're just perfecter.
246
00:11:31,793 --> 00:11:32,260
Look at her.
247
00:11:32,294 --> 00:11:33,797
Allegra 2.0.
248
00:11:33,830 --> 00:11:35,200
That's my girl.
249
00:11:35,433 --> 00:11:36,433
Look at her.
250
00:11:37,003 --> 00:11:38,005
That's mine.
251
00:11:40,878 --> 00:11:41,878
Oh, Okay.
252
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:56,941
What?
253
00:11:57,410 --> 00:11:58,410
This...
254
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:00,116
This sleaze tilt.
255
00:12:00,483 --> 00:12:02,822
If you want private
phone time, no problem.
256
00:12:02,855 --> 00:12:04,224
You just go like this.
257
00:12:04,258 --> 00:12:05,426
This is legit.
258
00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:06,930
This is sleazy.
259
00:12:08,099 --> 00:12:09,434
Oh, great.
260
00:12:09,468 --> 00:12:11,272
Legit. Valid.
261
00:12:13,476 --> 00:12:14,478
[chuckles].
262
00:12:17,417 --> 00:12:21,258
Hey, I really want to do this
thing together that I read.
263
00:12:21,292 --> 00:12:22,427
On Goop?
264
00:12:22,460 --> 00:12:23,797
Not on Goop.
265
00:12:24,231 --> 00:12:25,466
Something like Goop.
266
00:12:26,335 --> 00:12:29,408
It's called a burn ceremony
where you write down
267
00:12:29,441 --> 00:12:32,180
all your fears and everything
you want to let go of and
268
00:12:32,213 --> 00:12:34,484
then you burn it in
a fire together and
269
00:12:34,519 --> 00:12:35,988
let go of everything.
270
00:12:36,856 --> 00:12:38,459
What if I don't want
to burn my fears?
271
00:12:39,161 --> 00:12:40,161
Why?
272
00:12:41,866 --> 00:12:42,802
Did I only choose my job
273
00:12:42,835 --> 00:12:45,006
because I want to seem
like a good person?
274
00:12:46,408 --> 00:12:48,814
Where is this coming from?
275
00:12:49,147 --> 00:12:50,183
I don't know.
276
00:12:51,285 --> 00:12:53,022
Is this that troll talking?
277
00:12:53,055 --> 00:12:54,859
Are you still reading that shit?
278
00:12:55,594 --> 00:13:00,303
Allegra, you're literally
about to get an award.
279
00:13:00,537 --> 00:13:02,073
Miss Generational Inspiration.
280
00:13:02,107 --> 00:13:03,107
Yeah‐‐
281
00:13:04,177 --> 00:13:05,848
What is that even?
282
00:13:05,881 --> 00:13:07,283
Were there other nominees?
283
00:13:07,317 --> 00:13:08,820
Did I lose it last year?
284
00:13:08,854 --> 00:13:11,258
Why do you let this
voice get into your head?
285
00:13:12,327 --> 00:13:14,899
Your life is amazing.
286
00:13:14,932 --> 00:13:16,503
Everything is going so great.
287
00:13:16,536 --> 00:13:18,306
They're obviously just jealous.
288
00:13:20,376 --> 00:13:21,376
I know.
289
00:13:22,515 --> 00:13:23,449
I know.
290
00:13:23,482 --> 00:13:25,821
[music]
291
00:13:38,245 --> 00:13:41,218
Hey, I don't know who you are
and why you're writing to me but
292
00:13:41,251 --> 00:13:44,291
I wanted to reach out and say,
you're clearly in pain and
293
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:45,360
contrary to your beliefs,
294
00:13:45,393 --> 00:13:48,332
I am a very happy person
with a very fulfilling and
295
00:13:48,366 --> 00:13:53,042
satisfying life and I hope
whatever you're looking for,
296
00:13:53,075 --> 00:13:54,344
you find it.
297
00:13:57,651 --> 00:13:59,922
[background music]
298
00:14:43,109 --> 00:14:44,912
I truly feel sorry for you.
299
00:14:46,081 --> 00:14:49,121
You feel sorry for
yourself, as you should.
300
00:14:52,595 --> 00:14:54,398
Why are you obsessed with me?
301
00:14:57,203 --> 00:14:59,040
Why are you obsessed with me?
302
00:15:02,046 --> 00:15:04,886
You want me to seriously
engage with that question?
303
00:15:07,157 --> 00:15:09,060
I doubt you're capable of it.
304
00:15:10,363 --> 00:15:13,670
Obviously, it's because
I'm seeking validation.
305
00:15:15,507 --> 00:15:17,511
You get validation everywhere.
306
00:15:17,545 --> 00:15:19,314
You're not seeking that from me.
307
00:15:19,615 --> 00:15:24,257
Think harder, if you can do it,
which I don't know if you can.
308
00:15:30,604 --> 00:15:34,377
Okay, I'm seeking an escape
from mindless validation.
309
00:15:35,581 --> 00:15:37,217
Oh, all right.
310
00:15:37,250 --> 00:15:39,922
That's the intelligent
Allegra I wanted to talk to.
311
00:15:41,659 --> 00:15:43,262
Your life still sucks though.
312
00:15:45,466 --> 00:15:47,370
You're all doing perfect.
313
00:15:48,305 --> 00:15:50,042
You can do better than that.
314
00:15:50,577 --> 00:15:54,986
Breathe and release anything
that does not serve you.
315
00:15:55,587 --> 00:15:58,225
I'm trying to see if I
actually exist underneath
316
00:15:58,259 --> 00:15:59,394
all this validation.
317
00:15:59,427 --> 00:16:01,599
You're out of mind, by yourself.
318
00:16:01,633 --> 00:16:02,735
Oh, see?
319
00:16:02,768 --> 00:16:05,741
You're so much smarter when
you're actually challenged.
320
00:16:05,774 --> 00:16:08,379
Self‐love isn't
selfish, it's important.
321
00:16:08,412 --> 00:16:09,447
You know what?
322
00:16:09,481 --> 00:16:11,351
Validation isn't a bad thing.
323
00:16:11,385 --> 00:16:14,090
No one would ever be able
to do anything worthwhile
324
00:16:14,124 --> 00:16:16,228
without encouragement
and support.
325
00:16:17,297 --> 00:16:19,367
People would kill for
friends like these,
326
00:16:19,401 --> 00:16:23,142
for a partner like this, for
a support system like this.
327
00:16:24,512 --> 00:16:26,448
Sit, sit, sit.
328
00:16:26,481 --> 00:16:28,219
Why do you care about me?
329
00:16:28,252 --> 00:16:29,722
Are you someone I know?
330
00:16:29,755 --> 00:16:31,024
I don't care.
331
00:16:31,058 --> 00:16:32,495
It's easy to be honest when
332
00:16:32,528 --> 00:16:34,130
you don't care about somebody.
333
00:16:34,164 --> 00:16:37,170
And you know, unless you abandon
your need for validation,
334
00:16:37,203 --> 00:16:39,675
you will never become who
you're supposed to become.
335
00:16:39,709 --> 00:16:42,280
Allegra, we have a
little trick for you.
336
00:16:42,313 --> 00:16:45,019
You will never be free
to be who you want to be,
337
00:16:45,052 --> 00:16:46,154
who you could be.
338
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,593
You could be saying
this to anyone.
339
00:16:49,294 --> 00:16:52,367
I was bored and went
back on all your posts,
340
00:16:52,568 --> 00:16:54,672
way back when you
wanted to be a writer.
341
00:16:55,172 --> 00:16:56,743
What happened to that, Allegra?
342
00:16:57,243 --> 00:16:59,314
Before you just wrote, "#Goals"
343
00:16:59,347 --> 00:17:02,120
you actually had goals and
wrote in full sentences.
344
00:17:02,387 --> 00:17:03,222
Okay.
345
00:17:03,255 --> 00:17:05,059
Every word you
write, ask yourself,
346
00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:05,961
"Am I full of shit?
347
00:17:05,994 --> 00:17:08,232
Do I even have an inner
voice or am I just
348
00:17:08,265 --> 00:17:10,571
an echo chamber for
other empty people?"
349
00:17:10,604 --> 00:17:13,777
all of us looking for as many
people as possible to say
350
00:17:13,810 --> 00:17:15,781
something nice about
us before we die.
351
00:17:20,624 --> 00:17:23,496
Who are you posting for
anyway, before I came along?
352
00:17:24,532 --> 00:17:26,235
I wasn't posting for anyone.
353
00:17:27,237 --> 00:17:29,040
Everybody posts for somebody,
354
00:17:29,341 --> 00:17:31,078
consciously or unconsciously.
355
00:17:31,278 --> 00:17:32,748
There's someone
you hope sees it.
356
00:17:34,484 --> 00:17:36,488
You can't post without
picturing someone.
357
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,526
It's like coming.
358
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,431
[background music]
359
00:17:48,212 --> 00:17:50,316
You know, what's
fucked up is that
360
00:17:50,349 --> 00:17:52,086
I read all these
self‐help books.
361
00:17:52,120 --> 00:17:52,888
That is fucked up.
362
00:17:52,922 --> 00:17:54,424
That's wonderful,
you're searching.
363
00:17:54,457 --> 00:17:56,596
No, what's fucked up is
even they'll tell you
364
00:17:56,629 --> 00:17:57,641
that you're already great.
365
00:17:57,665 --> 00:18:01,104
Believing in yourself
is an essential part‐‐
366
00:18:01,338 --> 00:18:04,110
Shouldn't there be two sections
in the bookstore, like,
367
00:18:04,545 --> 00:18:06,649
"How To Be A Badass
Bitch" and the sequel is‐‐
368
00:18:06,683 --> 00:18:08,252
"You Are A Badass Bitch".
369
00:18:08,285 --> 00:18:09,522
You're funny.
370
00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:11,291
Anyone ever tell
you you're funny?
371
00:18:11,325 --> 00:18:12,695
[chuckles]
372
00:18:12,728 --> 00:18:14,464
Everyone tells me everything.
373
00:18:15,801 --> 00:18:18,740
Sometimes you caption your
photos like you're deathly
374
00:18:18,773 --> 00:18:21,111
afraid someone's going
to tell you're pathetic.
375
00:18:21,144 --> 00:18:23,449
Did you realize you're not
fooling anyone when you
376
00:18:23,482 --> 00:18:25,252
pose in yoga gear,
full makeup, and‐‐
377
00:18:25,286 --> 00:18:27,123
The fact that you
captioned a selfie,
378
00:18:27,156 --> 00:18:29,427
"I stand with my AAPI
brothers and sisters,"
379
00:18:29,461 --> 00:18:30,840
kind of makes me
think you don't have
380
00:18:30,864 --> 00:18:31,942
any AAPI brothers and sisters.
381
00:18:31,966 --> 00:18:33,746
Everyone's doing that
above angle that's supposed
382
00:18:33,770 --> 00:18:34,905
to be flattering‐‐
383
00:18:34,939 --> 00:18:38,145
And, every time you talk about
destroying capitalism you
384
00:18:38,178 --> 00:18:39,891
usually buy something
online later that day.
385
00:18:39,915 --> 00:18:42,220
Why were you a better
writer on LiveJournal at 16
386
00:18:42,253 --> 00:18:43,253
than you are now?
387
00:18:44,925 --> 00:18:46,562
See you Monday, Ms. Allegra.
388
00:18:51,572 --> 00:18:53,777
You made me ask questions
I'd never asked,
389
00:18:53,810 --> 00:18:55,847
pointed out things
no one had told me.
390
00:18:55,881 --> 00:18:58,620
How come no one told me
any of these things before,
391
00:18:58,653 --> 00:19:00,323
because they
couldn't see them or
392
00:19:00,356 --> 00:19:01,693
because they couldn't say them?
393
00:19:01,726 --> 00:19:02,695
Which is worse?
394
00:19:02,728 --> 00:19:05,333
Hey, Meredith just
texted and said you quit.
395
00:19:05,366 --> 00:19:07,938
It's so weird that it's
you who's doing this to me.
396
00:19:07,971 --> 00:19:11,311
Everyone would think I'm crazy
listening to some hater online.
397
00:19:11,579 --> 00:19:14,351
I don't think you'd be listening
to me unless you had to.
398
00:19:14,384 --> 00:19:15,353
What do you mean?
399
00:19:15,386 --> 00:19:17,624
You see someone rooting
around in the trash,
400
00:19:17,658 --> 00:19:19,595
you don't ask, "What
are you looking for?"
401
00:19:19,628 --> 00:19:21,365
You ask, "What did you lose?"
402
00:19:23,536 --> 00:19:24,538
Mmm‐‐ toss.
403
00:19:27,276 --> 00:19:28,276
Toss.
404
00:19:33,489 --> 00:19:34,525
Donate?
405
00:19:35,594 --> 00:19:37,430
So someone else
can throw it out?
406
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:44,945
Oh, I actually like
that transparent bag.
407
00:19:44,979 --> 00:19:46,214
Yeah, that's legit.
408
00:19:46,448 --> 00:19:47,651
I have the same one.
409
00:19:57,303 --> 00:19:59,441
[music]
410
00:20:10,797 --> 00:20:13,703
My love, the first
time I met you,
411
00:20:13,737 --> 00:20:14,737
the first‐‐
412
00:20:18,412 --> 00:20:20,382
the first time I
heard you speak,
413
00:20:20,951 --> 00:20:23,489
I felt like I was hearing
music for the first time.
414
00:20:23,523 --> 00:20:26,228
Like the way it feels
when you're 12 and
415
00:20:26,729 --> 00:20:30,269
you hear a song that instantly
makes you into an adult.
416
00:20:30,504 --> 00:20:32,975
Have we been watching
Garden State?
417
00:20:33,008 --> 00:20:35,714
That cuts straight
through everything else
418
00:20:36,281 --> 00:20:37,450
right to your heart.
419
00:20:37,818 --> 00:20:40,524
That one song that shows
you who you are and
420
00:20:40,557 --> 00:20:41,626
what you want.
421
00:20:45,366 --> 00:20:46,569
You know what's funny?
422
00:20:48,573 --> 00:20:49,842
You know what's funny?
423
00:20:50,977 --> 00:20:52,981
Hey, you know what's funny?
424
00:20:55,854 --> 00:20:57,423
You know what's funny?
425
00:20:59,662 --> 00:21:00,964
You know what's funny?
426
00:21:06,709 --> 00:21:08,913
[music]
427
00:21:23,342 --> 00:21:24,545
It's a loser.
428
00:21:24,845 --> 00:21:25,845
Who?
429
00:21:26,949 --> 00:21:28,285
You know who?
430
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,893
It's some 300‐pound
loser, sorry to fat shame,
431
00:21:31,926 --> 00:21:33,328
in their mother's basement.
432
00:21:33,362 --> 00:21:34,698
Sorry to income shame.
433
00:21:34,732 --> 00:21:36,502
Gross, ugly, random, like‐‐
434
00:21:37,436 --> 00:21:38,573
No, she isn't.
435
00:21:39,842 --> 00:21:41,311
Male loser.
436
00:21:41,344 --> 00:21:42,514
What the fuck?
437
00:21:42,948 --> 00:21:45,554
Who do you think is
sick in the head enough
438
00:21:45,587 --> 00:21:47,089
to do something like this?
439
00:21:47,123 --> 00:21:48,693
Don't insult her.
440
00:21:50,664 --> 00:21:51,664
What?
441
00:21:53,770 --> 00:21:54,839
So what?
442
00:21:54,872 --> 00:21:58,680
You think it's some super
hot, cool, sexy, awesome,
443
00:21:58,713 --> 00:22:00,517
smart lesbian, and then what?
444
00:22:00,550 --> 00:22:02,821
You're going to move in
together and have babies?
445
00:22:04,558 --> 00:22:05,558
Seriously?
446
00:22:07,865 --> 00:22:08,900
What if she's straight?
447
00:22:08,933 --> 00:22:10,002
It's not about that.
448
00:22:10,035 --> 00:22:11,739
It's about being
taken seriously.
449
00:22:11,772 --> 00:22:13,108
It's about being challenged.
450
00:22:13,141 --> 00:22:14,612
It's about being understood.
451
00:22:14,645 --> 00:22:16,983
It's about being told
the truth, finally.
452
00:22:18,753 --> 00:22:19,822
By a stranger?
453
00:22:19,855 --> 00:22:20,855
Yes.
454
00:22:22,861 --> 00:22:23,963
That's fucked up.
455
00:22:23,997 --> 00:22:26,836
What's fucked up is that it
had to be a stranger, Beth.
456
00:22:27,838 --> 00:22:29,508
All you do is gas me up.
457
00:22:29,542 --> 00:22:31,378
You just tell me
how perfect I am.
458
00:22:31,411 --> 00:22:33,482
Is that all you're capable of,
459
00:22:33,516 --> 00:22:35,520
or is that how honest
you can be, which?
460
00:22:36,956 --> 00:22:38,726
There's a lot I
could say right now.
461
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:39,929
Oh, baby.
462
00:22:39,962 --> 00:22:41,464
Lay it on me.
463
00:22:41,666 --> 00:22:43,703
Tell me something mean and true.
464
00:22:43,736 --> 00:22:44,736
Try.
465
00:22:45,907 --> 00:22:48,680
You're not as smart
as you think you are.
466
00:22:48,713 --> 00:22:51,586
You have like this
intellectual style.
467
00:22:52,554 --> 00:22:53,488
Yeah, you're clever.
468
00:22:53,523 --> 00:22:55,426
You're just‐‐ What?
469
00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:56,862
So sorry.
470
00:22:56,896 --> 00:22:59,835
It's just like watching a
little girl play dress‐up.
471
00:23:02,741 --> 00:23:03,910
I love you so much.
472
00:23:05,045 --> 00:23:07,116
I love you so fucking much.
473
00:23:08,553 --> 00:23:11,157
I wish I could tell you what
was it like to make you happy,
474
00:23:11,191 --> 00:23:12,426
but it's not.
475
00:23:12,961 --> 00:23:14,063
I can't help it.
476
00:23:15,533 --> 00:23:17,103
I think you're the best.
477
00:23:17,136 --> 00:23:21,378
I think you're the smartest,
the most beautiful,
478
00:23:22,113 --> 00:23:24,618
the most exquisite person.
479
00:23:26,121 --> 00:23:27,958
You're one in a million.
480
00:23:27,991 --> 00:23:29,895
You're one in like 10 billion.
481
00:23:32,634 --> 00:23:34,805
You want to know how many
times I've played out
482
00:23:34,838 --> 00:23:36,809
you leaving me for
someone better than me?
483
00:23:37,143 --> 00:23:38,143
All the time.
484
00:23:38,478 --> 00:23:40,416
But for someone who hates you?
485
00:23:41,051 --> 00:23:42,186
That's fucked up.
486
00:23:42,921 --> 00:23:45,860
You can feel however
you want about me.
487
00:23:46,829 --> 00:23:50,670
Don't treat my love like
this because that's unfair.
488
00:23:51,505 --> 00:23:54,912
Please just stop punishing
me for loving you.
489
00:23:55,947 --> 00:23:57,651
I can't help it.
490
00:23:58,519 --> 00:23:59,588
What am I doing?
491
00:24:02,594 --> 00:24:04,565
Hey, hey, hey, come here.
492
00:24:07,638 --> 00:24:08,673
I'm sorry.
493
00:24:09,875 --> 00:24:10,944
I'm so sorry.
494
00:24:25,674 --> 00:24:27,844
Hey, you are the best.
495
00:24:35,092 --> 00:24:36,161
It's fine.
496
00:24:36,762 --> 00:24:37,998
No, it's a little burnt.
497
00:24:38,031 --> 00:24:41,772
I like it when it's more golden
and then it goes like this.
498
00:24:44,310 --> 00:24:48,720
Okay, I am letting go of my
guilt over the animals of
499
00:24:48,753 --> 00:24:51,859
Hurricane Laura that
I couldn't save.
500
00:24:53,128 --> 00:24:57,504
I am letting go of my
need for external‐‐
501
00:24:58,105 --> 00:24:59,173
validation.
502
00:25:05,252 --> 00:25:09,027
I am letting go of my
little OCD around the house,
503
00:25:09,060 --> 00:25:10,029
[laughter]
504
00:25:10,062 --> 00:25:12,801
no offense to anyone
who has OCD, of course.
505
00:25:13,870 --> 00:25:18,111
I am letting go of the fear...
506
00:25:18,913 --> 00:25:20,215
that there is...
507
00:25:21,051 --> 00:25:25,159
someone I should be or
something I should be doing
508
00:25:25,192 --> 00:25:29,535
that isn't in the here and now.
509
00:25:35,179 --> 00:25:36,114
Yes!
510
00:25:36,147 --> 00:25:37,283
[laughter]
511
00:25:38,886 --> 00:25:39,955
Um...
512
00:25:43,195 --> 00:25:45,867
[background music]
513
00:25:45,900 --> 00:25:47,571
I want to give you something.
514
00:25:55,653 --> 00:25:56,922
What is this?
515
00:26:02,768 --> 00:26:04,738
It's the commentor...
516
00:26:04,772 --> 00:26:05,305
Um...
517
00:26:05,339 --> 00:26:06,341
After I blocked them,
518
00:26:06,374 --> 00:26:09,748
I hired this shady hacker
to track them down and
519
00:26:09,782 --> 00:26:11,685
find where they were
logging in from.
520
00:26:11,719 --> 00:26:13,656
So, that's their location.
521
00:26:14,725 --> 00:26:17,964
Just a random person in
a random office building
522
00:26:17,998 --> 00:26:19,200
in Dallas.
523
00:26:21,070 --> 00:26:22,206
[chuckles]
524
00:26:24,277 --> 00:26:25,880
You got them blocked?
525
00:26:27,349 --> 00:26:28,349
Yeah.
526
00:26:31,424 --> 00:26:32,894
You did that for me?
527
00:26:32,928 --> 00:26:33,928
Of course.
528
00:26:34,665 --> 00:26:36,134
I'll do anything for you.
529
00:26:40,810 --> 00:26:42,346
[music]
530
00:26:46,856 --> 00:26:49,761
[notification sounds]
531
00:26:55,239 --> 00:26:57,042
Smart people make
you feel smart,
532
00:26:57,309 --> 00:26:59,648
crazy people make
you feel crazy.
533
00:27:00,382 --> 00:27:02,821
I need to know who you
are to know who I am.
534
00:27:03,890 --> 00:27:06,027
[background music]
535
00:27:41,765 --> 00:27:44,337
Her smile is as
fake as her life.
536
00:27:44,738 --> 00:27:47,142
Her smile is as
fake as her life.
537
00:27:51,284 --> 00:27:53,856
Her smile is as
fake as her life.
538
00:28:05,178 --> 00:28:07,918
[music ends]
539
00:28:12,226 --> 00:28:14,096
Hey, is there a bathroom?
540
00:28:25,319 --> 00:28:26,319
[screams]
541
00:28:26,454 --> 00:28:28,191
I knew it, I knew it.
542
00:28:28,225 --> 00:28:30,028
I knew it would be worth it.
543
00:28:30,062 --> 00:28:31,498
I knew I would find you here and
544
00:28:31,532 --> 00:28:34,270
I knew you weren't just
a loser in a basement.
545
00:28:36,474 --> 00:28:38,445
Did you ever think
this would happen?
546
00:28:40,950 --> 00:28:41,950
No.
547
00:28:48,833 --> 00:28:50,803
Can I ask you just one question?
548
00:28:51,371 --> 00:28:52,371
Okay.
549
00:28:54,878 --> 00:28:56,481
What should I do with my life?
550
00:28:59,153 --> 00:29:02,192
You want me, a stranger you
just met in the bathroom
551
00:29:02,226 --> 00:29:04,096
to tell you what to
do with your life?
552
00:29:05,098 --> 00:29:06,098
Yeah.
553
00:29:08,138 --> 00:29:09,908
Are you listening to yourself?
554
00:29:14,851 --> 00:29:17,524
That's a great question.
555
00:29:19,427 --> 00:29:20,462
I just feel‐‐
556
00:29:20,496 --> 00:29:23,468
I don't care what you
meant, I care what I heard.
557
00:29:23,970 --> 00:29:25,405
Let me just look at you.
558
00:29:25,439 --> 00:29:26,439
What?
559
00:29:31,184 --> 00:29:32,186
What?
560
00:29:34,925 --> 00:29:36,327
You look like a troll,
561
00:29:36,895 --> 00:29:38,231
like a pretty little troll.
562
00:29:38,264 --> 00:29:40,503
But whatever else you
think you are you're not.
563
00:29:40,536 --> 00:29:43,375
Your whole life is just a sad
reflection of the people you
564
00:29:43,408 --> 00:29:45,913
choose to obsess over.
565
00:29:45,947 --> 00:29:47,216
Thank you.
566
00:29:47,617 --> 00:29:49,286
I needed to hear that.
567
00:29:56,067 --> 00:29:57,236
I'm going to go now.
568
00:29:57,269 --> 00:29:57,937
Okay.
569
00:29:57,971 --> 00:29:59,808
I'll never forget you and um‐‐
570
00:30:01,277 --> 00:30:02,279
thank you.
571
00:30:03,883 --> 00:30:04,951
Fuck you.
572
00:30:06,354 --> 00:30:07,423
I love you.
573
00:30:10,429 --> 00:30:11,498
I love you.
574
00:30:14,036 --> 00:30:16,040
[music]
575
00:30:21,919 --> 00:30:23,254
I'm ready for a new job.
576
00:30:23,488 --> 00:30:25,125
I don't really like kids.
577
00:30:25,493 --> 00:30:27,998
I want to be a writer but
I'm not that good at it.
578
00:30:28,198 --> 00:30:30,168
I think I'll start
a vintage store.
579
00:30:30,202 --> 00:30:31,905
It's lame, but I don't care.
580
00:30:31,939 --> 00:30:35,445
Beth is beautiful and
sexy, but I'm sick of her.
581
00:30:35,646 --> 00:30:36,481
I'm hungry.
582
00:30:36,515 --> 00:30:38,619
Maybe there's a Sonic
on the way back.
583
00:30:38,652 --> 00:30:41,024
I love fast food on the highway,
It always tastes better.
584
00:30:41,057 --> 00:30:42,927
I wonder why? Huh.
585
00:30:43,596 --> 00:30:45,465
That's what my inner
voice sounds like.
586
00:30:45,500 --> 00:30:47,436
It's a little boring.
587
00:30:48,471 --> 00:30:50,409
[music]
39846
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