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Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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This film is based on a true salad.
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In respect to all survivors,
some ingredients have been changed.
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Please!
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Hey! The phone's ringing! Quiet!
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- Don't worry. We'll carry on in a second.
- No problem.
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Thank you.
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Answer, for Heaven's sake, please!
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9-1-1, what's your emergency, hello?
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Hello?!
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Hello?!
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Hello?!
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Don't be scared, I'm there! The police!
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Protecting and serving you!
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Hey, I can hear footsteps!
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Don't you want to talk?!
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Running away doesn't solve anything!
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I guess it wasn't that important.
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POTATO SALAD
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DON'T ASK!
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ONE WEEK BEFORE THE OUTBREAK
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Hang on there, son.
Gotta get big and strong.
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There's breakfast at school today!
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- There! That's taken care of.
- Mom!
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- Enjoy school.
- Don't screw up, or you cook this weekend.
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Good luck.
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00:04:15,917 --> 00:04:17,417
Good morning, Leo!
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00:04:20,042 --> 00:04:21,667
Hello, Leo!
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00:04:44,042 --> 00:04:45,042
Hello, Leo!
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00:05:01,292 --> 00:05:08,459
Dear students, the driver of
the private jet licensed HEIDE - HH 0815
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00:05:08,584 --> 00:05:12,376
please contact the valet
parking service immediately. Thank you!
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00:05:19,084 --> 00:05:20,167
A
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A...
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00:05:24,709 --> 00:05:28,501
- A-minus...
- Oh my God, oh my god, no!
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00:05:28,792 --> 00:05:32,709
- Oh man, if they did that bad...
- B
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00:05:32,792 --> 00:05:34,709
I think I screwed up badly this time.
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00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,751
You say that every time and
then end up with an A or B!
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00:05:38,042 --> 00:05:40,001
Meike, an A
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00:05:40,584 --> 00:05:42,459
- Leo, an A...
- What?!
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Leo Hinrichs!
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00:05:45,251 --> 00:05:49,584
You the A, and you the F.
Almost surprised me there.
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00:05:50,292 --> 00:05:54,251
Keep in mind, folks,
nobody remembers who comes second.
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00:05:54,459 --> 00:05:56,792
What's that in your face?
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- Yes, there.
- Oh, that's gotta be my mom.
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00:06:00,459 --> 00:06:05,042
So, we're now moving
on from “the evolution of mankind” to
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- sex education.
- We already had that in 7th grade!
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00:06:09,542 --> 00:06:16,251
Well, things have changed. When you were in
7th grade, only men and women could have
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00:06:16,917 --> 00:06:18,667
intercourse.
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00:06:18,792 --> 00:06:24,251
But nowadays it's legit for
women with women, men with men...
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- Penis.
- Two women with one man...
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- Penis.
- Three men with... one sheep...
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Penis.
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Whatever. Now I’m sure you're
wondering how that's supposed to work,
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if you've got just two trains and no
station, or two stations but no train.
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00:06:45,334 --> 00:06:49,834
- I'll explain it to you with an example.
- Penis.
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00:06:49,959 --> 00:06:54,042
Let's say this is a station,
and this is a train.
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That is a train.
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00:06:59,126 --> 00:07:03,126
If the train were to
enter the station with a rubber coat,
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00:07:03,251 --> 00:07:06,334
- theoretically no passengers could get out.
- Penis.
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00:07:06,459 --> 00:07:13,501
So let's say a whole swarm of people is
to be ejaculated... ejected at the station.
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00:07:13,626 --> 00:07:20,667
The train must carefully enter the
station, back and forth, forth and back,
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until all passengers have left the train.
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Then, after a little rest,
the train can go visit other stations.
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I don't get it.
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Penis!
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00:07:37,376 --> 00:07:38,417
Take your seats.
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No shit.
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00:07:48,834 --> 00:07:56,292
Uh, Mrs. Bauer won't make it to class today.
Unfortunately she choked on a gigantic...
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PENIS!
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Exactly.
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Leo, in my office.
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00:08:07,876 --> 00:08:10,209
- Thank you, Mrs. Stamm.
- You're welcome, sir.
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00:08:10,542 --> 00:08:15,834
Mrs. Knows, Mr. Knows,
I know we've met here often,
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and you know I've been running
this showpiece school for 17 years now.
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But such a non-showpiece student,
as your Leo clearly is, overwhelms me.
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00:08:26,459 --> 00:08:30,959
Our flag motto is that
“we get all students right”.
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Nobody just gets dropped from our school.
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And we take our pride in that.
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But a case like Leo
makes Einstein roll over in his grave.
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His grades clearly show
that Leo Knows... nothing!
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And his social behavior makes one blush.
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00:08:51,292 --> 00:08:56,292
I'd like to mention that Leo wasn't
the only one to say the P-word in class.
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00:08:56,417 --> 00:09:03,709
I know, Mrs. Knows, but last week Leo uttered
many F-words, H-words and even B-words!
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- B-words?
- Bagpipe-face.
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Oh, Lord.
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00:09:06,376 --> 00:09:11,042
Proper steps must be taken, Leo must
repeat 10th grade. In a new class he can...
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00:09:11,167 --> 00:09:15,751
That's no option! My son will graduate
in 3 years and become a chemist, like me.
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I know, Mrs. Knows, Mr. Knows,
at first it sounds like no good, again...
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No good?! No Gouda at all!
You know my son has ADD!
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ADHD in fact! That's even worse than ADD!
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Well, if that's the case,
I'm forced to convene a school conference.
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00:09:33,167 --> 00:09:35,792
Because my son shouted
the P-word in class?!
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00:09:35,917 --> 00:09:38,792
It's not about the stupid P-word!
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00:09:38,917 --> 00:09:42,084
Leo's a loser! A shame
to our lovely school!
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00:09:42,209 --> 00:09:47,042
But I'm not gonna be the one to kick
him out! That would destroy my image.
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00:09:48,459 --> 00:09:53,292
- Hey! Nobody insults my son but me, got it?
- Right, dude.
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00:09:53,417 --> 00:09:55,042
Walter, Leo, we're leaving.
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- Leo, you're changing schools.
- But...
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This decision is your fault alone.
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DRIVE AWAY
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Done.
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00:10:23,876 --> 00:10:27,334
Dear students, there's good news!
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00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:30,834
Leo Knows is leaving the school today!
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00:11:11,626 --> 00:11:14,334
May I... reach over a second... Thanks.
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00:11:15,334 --> 00:11:17,459
Wasn't it supposed to be pizza for dinner?
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00:11:17,584 --> 00:11:20,751
- Leo, I put you in the Hebbel School.
- OK.
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00:11:20,876 --> 00:11:22,501
And tomorrow's your first day.
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00:11:23,084 --> 00:11:23,751
Tomorrow?!
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00:11:23,834 --> 00:11:28,292
Leo, we're not doing this to spite you.
Try to look at it as a new start.
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00:11:28,417 --> 00:11:33,334
We never saw you bring friends home,
or go to a party at night.
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00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:35,584
Not to mention your grades.
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00:11:35,709 --> 00:11:40,667
And if they stay that way in the new
school, we're cutting you from acrobatics.
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00:11:40,792 --> 00:11:44,084
- What?!
- What are we to do, Leo? We tried everything!
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00:11:44,209 --> 00:11:47,292
Horseback therapy, swimming with dolphins,
elephant-hunting in South Africa,
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00:11:47,417 --> 00:11:51,751
whaling at the Japanese coast,
and none of all that helped!
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00:11:52,542 --> 00:11:54,142
You both think I'm a total loser, right?
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00:11:54,334 --> 00:11:56,501
Oh, Leo. We just want...
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00:11:56,626 --> 00:11:58,167
No, it's OK. I got it, thanks!
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00:11:58,709 --> 00:12:01,334
I mean, I knew that
Dad thought that of me, but now you...
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Did it ever cross your mind
that it could also be your fault?!
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00:12:04,626 --> 00:12:09,709
If you keep treating me like a loser,
what am I to learn but, “OK, I'm a loser”?!
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00:12:10,876 --> 00:12:14,126
Fuck it, I'll have the last laugh!
At the new school, I'm gonna be the hero!
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00:12:14,251 --> 00:12:18,001
The womanizer, the guy everybody likes!
And not the damn stumblebum!
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00:12:19,959 --> 00:12:21,501
OK, here we go.
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00:12:21,667 --> 00:12:23,459
Stay cool, Leo.
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00:12:24,792 --> 00:12:26,584
Dad, can you drive me to school?
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00:12:29,459 --> 00:12:34,084
Thanks, Dad. I'll sure make new friends
showing up here on my cool ladies' bike.
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00:12:34,209 --> 00:12:36,792
Well, I hope at least
the teachers are a bit nicer here.
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00:12:36,959 --> 00:12:38,376
Cool hunk of junk, dude!
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00:12:45,834 --> 00:12:49,709
Uh, dear students, a little announcement
personally from principal Roos:
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00:12:49,834 --> 00:12:54,709
“If you don't show up in class,
neither will I! Eat me!”
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00:12:55,084 --> 00:12:59,167
Oh man, I'm know not a soul.
If only I knew just one person here...
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00:12:59,876 --> 00:13:03,084
Forget it. Remember the mission.
Keep cool, don't screw up.
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00:13:03,209 --> 00:13:05,084
Don't stumble, don't say anything stupid.
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00:13:05,501 --> 00:13:08,334
If somebody talks to you, just be friendly.
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00:13:08,751 --> 00:13:09,334
Excuse me?
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00:13:09,459 --> 00:13:13,584
FUCK OFF!
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00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,542
Uh, sorry, I didn't mean that.
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00:13:15,667 --> 00:13:19,459
Today's my first day,
and I'm totally nervous. My name is Leo.
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00:13:19,584 --> 00:13:21,084
Katrin. Yeah.
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00:13:21,209 --> 00:13:24,667
Our spring ball's at Wednesday.
Charity event for the Catholic ice rink.
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00:13:28,626 --> 00:13:30,643
And by the way,
everybody has to bring a snack there.
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00:13:30,667 --> 00:13:34,334
Cool. Hey, wait. Can you tell me
where to find the secretary's office?
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00:13:34,459 --> 00:13:36,917
Go into the building,
down the hall, last door to the right.
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00:13:37,001 --> 00:13:38,917
And sorry, I really didn't mean that.
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00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:43,709
It's OK. By the way, ask for Mrs. Martens.
If Mrs. Wilkens is there... run!
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00:13:44,709 --> 00:13:45,709
MRS. WILKENS
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00:13:47,459 --> 00:13:48,876
Uh, I'm looking for Mrs. Martens.
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00:13:49,001 --> 00:13:51,282
Mrs. Martens is sick today.
You'll have to put up with me.
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00:13:51,626 --> 00:13:54,917
OK, I just wanted to know
which class to go to. I'm Leo Knows, the...
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00:13:55,042 --> 00:13:59,167
The kid who changed schools
hoping things will get better here. I know.
153
00:13:59,834 --> 00:14:03,542
First I'll need your ID
and criminal record.
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00:14:05,042 --> 00:14:06,876
I didn't know I'd have to bring that.
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00:14:07,084 --> 00:14:08,626
And how am I to know you're Leo Knows?
156
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,584
Well, maybe you're
someone who likes to drown kittens.
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00:14:12,709 --> 00:14:15,292
We don't want students
on this school who drown kittens.
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00:14:15,959 --> 00:14:17,667
Do you drown kittens, Leo?
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00:14:18,042 --> 00:14:21,251
Ah, good morning,
Mrs. Wilkens. How are you today?
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00:14:21,334 --> 00:14:23,042
Oh, thank you. Such lovely weather.
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00:14:23,167 --> 00:14:27,501
You must be Leo Knows, the kid who changed
schools hoping things will get better here.
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00:14:28,042 --> 00:14:34,084
Yes, my mother registered me yesterday, and
this lady wants my criminal record and ID.
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00:14:34,251 --> 00:14:37,876
Mrs. Wilkens, couldn't you
resist teasing our new student?
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00:14:38,001 --> 00:14:40,792
- You know me.
- Mrs. Wilkens, Mrs. Wilkens.
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00:14:40,917 --> 00:14:42,197
You don't drown kittens, do you?
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00:14:43,084 --> 00:14:44,834
New class for this one, please.
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00:14:45,251 --> 00:14:49,209
The bullies from Mr. Donau's class showed
once again where you don't want to end up...
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00:14:49,334 --> 00:14:50,459
In Mr. Donau's class.
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00:14:50,834 --> 00:14:52,667
He drowns kittens, Leo.
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00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:55,501
Bring him 10 a new class.
We'll clear his seat for someone else.
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00:14:56,084 --> 00:14:58,084
We could give it to Leo here, right?
172
00:14:58,501 --> 00:15:00,084
- Is that really necessary?
- No.
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00:15:00,209 --> 00:15:01,569
- Could I get another class?
- Yes.
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00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:02,935
- But you won't let me, right?
- No.
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00:15:02,959 --> 00:15:04,209
- Pity.
- Yes.
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00:15:07,542 --> 00:15:13,501
So, my motto of the day is:
“A good fart is better than bad music.”
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00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:19,459
You guys gotta remember that one,
it always comes in handy.
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00:15:19,667 --> 00:15:23,501
And now I have some super news for you.
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00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:26,667
And I'm gonna give you a little hint
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00:15:27,542 --> 00:15:30,251
Leonardo Not DiCaprio...
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00:15:30,584 --> 00:15:34,542
Leo-Nerdo Ladies' Bike!
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00:15:38,626 --> 00:15:46,501
I don't want to keep you in suspense
any longer. So pay attention now...
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00:15:48,417 --> 00:15:54,167
May I have a round
of applause for our new student?
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00:15:54,376 --> 00:15:59,292
The one and only Leo!
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00:16:14,084 --> 00:16:15,584
Here he is. The Leo.
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00:16:16,584 --> 00:16:18,917
Katrin! Hey, it's me!
The guy from the schoolyard!
187
00:16:19,501 --> 00:16:21,584
Katrin? Katrin, it's me!
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00:16:23,292 --> 00:16:27,001
Looks like somebody found his girl, huh?
189
00:16:27,126 --> 00:16:33,417
Leonardo Not DaVinci...
Leonardo There-Sits-She!
190
00:16:36,751 --> 00:16:40,292
Leo, how about
you introduce yourself to the class?
191
00:16:41,542 --> 00:16:45,876
Well, I'm Leo.
I used to go to Elite High School...
192
00:16:46,001 --> 00:16:51,876
And in the other school,
your peers were all mean to you, right?
193
00:16:52,001 --> 00:16:54,251
Well, yes, but
you don't have to say it like that...
194
00:16:54,376 --> 00:17:01,417
Who gives a fuck? But I don't want any of you
rubbing it in that they were so mean to Leo.
195
00:17:01,584 --> 00:17:09,584
No. I want you to receive Leo as kindly
as Andi, who came to our school last week.
196
00:17:11,167 --> 00:17:14,459
And now we just gotta
find a seat for you...
197
00:17:15,584 --> 00:17:17,459
Could I... Next to Katrin maybe...?
198
00:17:17,584 --> 00:17:21,626
Next to Katrin...?
Nah, nah, nah, go sit next to Andi.
199
00:17:21,876 --> 00:17:24,417
Next to Andi. Shake a leg.
200
00:17:24,501 --> 00:17:28,709
Of course this had to happen!
Now I have to sit next to the loser Andi.
201
00:17:28,834 --> 00:17:31,792
His loserliness will
automatically be transferred to me!
202
00:17:33,334 --> 00:17:34,626
Well, let's wait and see.
203
00:17:35,751 --> 00:17:42,417
To the spring ball,
you all must bring food and drinks.
204
00:17:42,542 --> 00:17:43,834
Hey. Andi.
205
00:17:44,001 --> 00:17:45,626
No, Leo. But never mind.
206
00:17:45,834 --> 00:17:47,459
So what's in the next period?
207
00:17:47,959 --> 00:17:49,084
Sports.
208
00:17:54,792 --> 00:18:01,792
So, all ladies who cannot participate due
to their periods, please go sit over there.
209
00:18:07,251 --> 00:18:08,459
What are periods?
210
00:18:09,126 --> 00:18:10,709
Math, physics, sports...
211
00:18:10,834 --> 00:18:13,126
And now we're gonna do some acrobatics.
212
00:18:13,459 --> 00:18:15,292
Aw, not acrobatics again!
213
00:18:15,542 --> 00:18:18,667
So lame. Acrobatics, so lame.
214
00:18:18,792 --> 00:18:20,376
Cool! Cool! I'm good at that! Cool!
215
00:18:20,501 --> 00:18:21,834
Chemistry, history...
216
00:18:21,959 --> 00:18:26,959
Kids, kids, back then in 2014
when I was European champion in acrobatics
217
00:18:27,084 --> 00:18:29,751
female hearts just kept flying my way.
218
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:34,417
So, everybody over to the mat, and
we'll start with a simple roll. Chop-chop!
219
00:18:34,959 --> 00:18:36,584
Lame, lame, lame...
220
00:18:37,126 --> 00:18:38,959
Whattaya mean,
Cheyenne Club's closed today?!
221
00:18:39,126 --> 00:18:41,334
Dude, you swore me we'd go there today!
222
00:18:41,459 --> 00:18:42,917
That guy's so goblin!
223
00:18:46,584 --> 00:18:47,584
He can't do it!
224
00:18:49,001 --> 00:18:53,667
Kids, kids, kids, what a bunch
of dummies! I can't watch any longer!
225
00:19:06,417 --> 00:19:09,251
You crossed the line, boy! It's over!
226
00:19:12,376 --> 00:19:14,542
What, you're proposing?!
227
00:19:14,834 --> 00:19:19,084
Omigod, girls! My boyfriend proposed to me!
228
00:19:25,792 --> 00:19:27,751
Kids, kids, isn't that romantic?
229
00:19:27,876 --> 00:19:31,626
Romance is one of the
most important things ever, I must say.
230
00:20:02,001 --> 00:20:03,001
Hi.
231
00:20:04,834 --> 00:20:06,001
That rocked, your
232
00:20:08,542 --> 00:20:09,709
I'm Torsten.
233
00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:12,626
- That's... Torben.
- Hi, I'm Torben.
234
00:20:12,751 --> 00:20:15,751
Hi. You're not like
the coolest dudes in this school, are you?
235
00:20:17,292 --> 00:20:18,292
Yes!
236
00:20:24,042 --> 00:20:25,667
We're anything but cool!
237
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:28,032
We don't smoke,
we don't drink, or listen to hip-hop, yo!
238
00:20:28,417 --> 00:20:30,435
We're called Torsten and Torben,
that says it all, doesn't it?
239
00:20:30,459 --> 00:20:32,334
Yeah, all names that start with "Tor" suck!
240
00:20:32,459 --> 00:20:33,542
Yes, that's true, uh...
241
00:20:34,417 --> 00:20:35,417
You're new here, right?
242
00:20:35,459 --> 00:20:38,209
Yeah. Sorry, what's
with the gas mask, dude?
243
00:20:38,334 --> 00:20:41,251
I'm an allergy sufferer.
I got pretty much every allergy there is.
244
00:20:41,376 --> 00:20:43,334
Torben's even allergic to his allergies.
245
00:20:43,459 --> 00:20:48,084
Yes. When I get hay fever and wet eyes,
my ears react and I get a soar throat.
246
00:20:48,251 --> 00:20:49,477
OK, what does the school doctor say?
247
00:20:49,501 --> 00:20:52,376
Fuck me, Torben!
Never seen anything like this!
248
00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:53,667
You just have it all!
249
00:20:53,959 --> 00:20:55,251
Can't even have sex!
250
00:20:55,417 --> 00:20:57,709
Your skin's allergic to women's juice!
251
00:20:58,167 --> 00:20:59,584
Your pecker would just...
252
00:21:02,251 --> 00:21:04,167
- So what should I do?
- If I were you
253
00:21:05,084 --> 00:21:06,209
I'd kill myself!
254
00:21:09,334 --> 00:21:12,001
Chicks love it. He has a new one every day!
255
00:21:12,167 --> 00:21:15,792
Of course nobody admits to
having sex with a loser, but it's true.
256
00:21:16,126 --> 00:21:19,751
One time I forgot, and during
fellatio I almost choked on my tongue!
257
00:21:19,917 --> 00:21:22,792
Yeah, OK but... Who's that girl Perle?
258
00:21:22,917 --> 00:21:24,917
Shouldn't you be in class?
259
00:21:25,251 --> 00:21:27,334
What, you sneak into the toilet?
260
00:21:27,459 --> 00:21:30,584
Aw, you're so cut! See you in the break!
261
00:21:30,792 --> 00:21:32,667
God. Don't tell me you got your eye on her.
262
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:34,751
No, no,
I just think there's something about her.
263
00:21:34,876 --> 00:21:35,626
There's something on you.
264
00:21:35,751 --> 00:21:37,834
Yeah. It's called loose screws.
265
00:21:38,209 --> 00:21:39,792
Trust me, she won't make you happy.
266
00:21:39,917 --> 00:21:43,334
So who thinks I banged
my boyfriend 3 times in a train?
267
00:21:43,459 --> 00:21:45,834
Uh, I think maybe 2 or 2.5 or so?
268
00:21:45,959 --> 00:21:48,292
No, man! Wrong, 5 times!
269
00:21:52,167 --> 00:21:54,042
That's what I call discipline!
270
00:21:54,292 --> 00:21:56,334
You should follow her example!
271
00:21:56,459 --> 00:21:59,019
She's such a role model!
I only had sex twice in the locker room.
272
00:21:59,126 --> 00:22:02,084
What?!
Locker room is so 2014! Go to the retros!
273
00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:10,042
TWO NIGHTS BEFORE THE OUTBREAK
274
00:22:44,792 --> 00:22:49,084
Dear students, for your information,
kittens are not meant for drowning.
275
00:22:49,209 --> 00:22:51,542
And now enjoy some Eko Fresh.
276
00:22:56,334 --> 00:22:59,334
- So, Leo a Nutella bun.
- Thanks.
277
00:22:59,459 --> 00:23:02,959
And Torben a bowl of dry rice
without additives or preservatives.
278
00:23:03,126 --> 00:23:04,126
Thank you.
279
00:23:04,251 --> 00:23:06,417
You know, I think I'll just go talk to her.
280
00:23:06,501 --> 00:23:09,251
- What? Who?
- Perle.
281
00:23:09,376 --> 00:23:12,667
I swear, I totally got
armpit terror, it's gotten so damn warm!
282
00:23:12,792 --> 00:23:14,501
Let's go get sunbed-toasted later, yeah?
283
00:23:14,626 --> 00:23:18,167
My doc said not to go
so often because of the dangerous TV rays.
284
00:23:19,834 --> 00:23:21,542
What, you wanna go with a bang?
285
00:23:24,334 --> 00:23:25,542
I don't know.
286
00:23:25,626 --> 00:23:29,751
Good. Because first,
this woman is insanely evil,
287
00:23:29,876 --> 00:23:30,584
She's a woman.
288
00:23:30,709 --> 00:23:35,209
And second, she just got proposed to
by the school's macho. Are you suicidal?!
289
00:23:35,334 --> 00:23:36,560
I just think she's interesting!
290
00:23:36,584 --> 00:23:39,345
Vaginal mycosis is interesting,
too, but that doesn't make me want it.
291
00:23:39,376 --> 00:23:41,001
Why do you know about vaginal mycosis?
292
00:23:41,209 --> 00:23:44,167
- My mom told me about it.
- And why do you talk with her about that?!
293
00:23:44,292 --> 00:23:46,560
- I have a good relationship with my mom.
- Yes, but not with her vagina!
294
00:23:46,584 --> 00:23:47,584
Boys!
295
00:23:47,792 --> 00:23:49,376
I'm going to talk to her now, OK?!
296
00:23:50,334 --> 00:23:52,167
Have some of this! It smells good!
297
00:23:52,292 --> 00:23:53,292
Thank you!
298
00:23:53,376 --> 00:23:54,376
Leo!
299
00:23:54,626 --> 00:23:57,906
When you're on the floor, don't defend
yourself, then they might think you're dead.
300
00:23:58,417 --> 00:23:59,417
Wish me luck.
301
00:24:00,209 --> 00:24:01,417
Uh, Leo, you got...
302
00:24:01,542 --> 00:24:03,501
Immortality status already, I know.
303
00:24:04,876 --> 00:24:05,876
Leo Knows!
304
00:24:06,042 --> 00:24:08,459
Dear students, it's beef today! 1.99!
305
00:24:08,792 --> 00:24:09,792
Hello!
306
00:24:11,917 --> 00:24:13,792
I'm Leo, and, uh
307
00:24:13,917 --> 00:24:16,084
I think you girls rock!
308
00:24:17,584 --> 00:24:19,334
Yo, Perle, did he just insult your mamma?!
309
00:24:23,001 --> 00:24:25,334
I... No, no, I just wanted to
310
00:24:26,167 --> 00:24:28,501
I think I'd rather go now.
311
00:24:30,417 --> 00:24:32,297
Now you're fucked,
my friend! Now you're fucked!
312
00:24:32,334 --> 00:24:33,602
Now you're gonna get fucked, my friend!
313
00:24:33,626 --> 00:24:34,376
Anally!
314
00:24:34,501 --> 00:24:35,501
Who the hell are you?
315
00:24:36,876 --> 00:24:38,316
Dear Lord, keep his suffering short!
316
00:24:38,376 --> 00:24:40,042
Leo. And you?
317
00:24:43,584 --> 00:24:44,626
Helmut.
318
00:24:45,792 --> 00:24:47,518
Could you repeat that
out loud for everyone?
319
00:24:47,542 --> 00:24:48,584
Helmut!
320
00:24:49,126 --> 00:24:51,227
Alright, he's as good as dead,
I'll delete him on Facebook.
321
00:24:51,251 --> 00:24:52,501
Did you just harass my girl?!
322
00:24:52,626 --> 00:24:54,626
No, no, really, I just said hello!
323
00:24:54,751 --> 00:24:55,876
You insulted her mamma?!
324
00:24:56,001 --> 00:24:57,201
What?! No, what's your guys'...
325
00:24:57,292 --> 00:24:59,042
Nobody... Listen up...
326
00:24:59,167 --> 00:25:02,667
Nobody insults my mamma's girlfriend!
327
00:25:02,834 --> 00:25:05,292
You mean your... girlfriend's mamma, right?
328
00:25:06,126 --> 00:25:07,667
I'm telling you! Hard!
329
00:25:07,834 --> 00:25:08,834
Dude! Man!
330
00:25:08,959 --> 00:25:10,126
Prepare to die!
331
00:25:16,126 --> 00:25:19,251
- What's he doing?!
- He's doing the nipple twister!
332
00:25:19,376 --> 00:25:22,251
Oh, no! His still just a child!
333
00:25:29,917 --> 00:25:31,042
OK! Defibrillator!
334
00:25:35,876 --> 00:25:37,156
Wonderful, thank you, thank you!
335
00:25:47,292 --> 00:25:51,209
THE NIGHT BEFORE THE OUTBREAK
336
00:25:58,876 --> 00:26:01,251
DRIVE AWAY
337
00:26:02,084 --> 00:26:06,167
THE SPRING BALL
338
00:26:18,667 --> 00:26:19,667
Great!
339
00:26:20,751 --> 00:26:22,917
I bailed on "Starcraft 2" for this!
340
00:26:40,334 --> 00:26:44,376
Seriously, dude,
your girlfriend's such a horse-face!
341
00:26:44,501 --> 00:26:46,876
That's enough! Cindy, we're leaving!
342
00:26:47,542 --> 00:26:49,584
That's so rude! So rude!
343
00:26:49,876 --> 00:26:53,834
Hey! Sorry, this pork
hedgehog took me ages!
344
00:26:53,959 --> 00:26:56,334
You bring a pork
hedgehog to a spring ball?!
345
00:27:02,417 --> 00:27:04,459
Torben, dead water?
346
00:27:04,584 --> 00:27:05,667
Yes, please.
347
00:27:07,876 --> 00:27:09,042
Is this yours?
348
00:27:09,167 --> 00:27:10,376
Oh, uh, thanks.
349
00:27:11,584 --> 00:27:13,792
You wanna stink? I mean, you wanna drink?
350
00:27:13,917 --> 00:27:15,459
Yeah, yeah, a Mamma-Babbel!
351
00:27:16,792 --> 00:27:18,751
- Here.
- Thanks. Cool here, isn't it?
352
00:27:18,876 --> 00:27:20,292
Yeah, uh... Really cool...
353
00:27:21,459 --> 00:27:23,001
Really jiggy!
354
00:27:24,251 --> 00:27:25,501
Don't you want anything?!
355
00:27:25,626 --> 00:27:28,084
Uh, yes, uh... I'll take...
356
00:27:28,209 --> 00:27:30,167
Omigod, that's not available in stores yet!
357
00:27:30,292 --> 00:27:32,626
- "Nerdcraft 3", dude!
- Limited edition!
358
00:27:32,751 --> 00:27:34,376
I'll have some of the punch.
359
00:27:39,876 --> 00:27:41,792
- Cool. Here's to us.
- Here's to me.
360
00:27:44,126 --> 00:27:47,792
You know, yesterday I went
tattoo studio, although my mom said no,
361
00:27:47,917 --> 00:27:50,917
but I said, "Fuck you,
mom, what do you want, I'm 151".
362
00:27:51,334 --> 00:27:54,667
I'm an adult woman, I got my
driver's license at Legoland when I was 9!
363
00:27:54,792 --> 00:27:56,626
Who cares? I was always premature!
364
00:27:56,751 --> 00:27:59,876
Anyway, I secretly go my tattoo
sketched out, you wanna see it?
365
00:28:00,001 --> 00:28:01,167
Yeah, yeah, sure!
366
00:28:01,792 --> 00:28:03,376
LEO IS A LOSER
367
00:28:04,959 --> 00:28:07,084
Ha, girls, check out his face!
368
00:28:09,376 --> 00:28:13,251
Hey, we gotta post that
on Facebook and Lovoo... #LeolsALoser.
369
00:28:31,209 --> 00:28:38,417
THE DAY OF THE OUTBREAK
370
00:28:39,709 --> 00:28:41,209
Uh... Dear students...
371
00:28:42,292 --> 00:28:43,876
What was I gonna say...?
372
00:28:44,626 --> 00:28:46,834
Whoa, I could so eat
chocolate pudding now...
373
00:28:49,626 --> 00:28:50,876
NATIONAL ASSHOLES
374
00:28:52,917 --> 00:28:54,459
NATIONAL MEGA-ASSHOLE-SHITHEADS
375
00:28:57,834 --> 00:28:58,834
OK.
376
00:28:59,459 --> 00:29:00,459
I'm done.
377
00:29:00,542 --> 00:29:02,751
THE WORLD'S
10 MOST SPECTACULAR ALLERGIES
378
00:29:03,001 --> 00:29:04,001
Me too.
379
00:29:07,084 --> 00:29:09,167
SHIT, MY ONLY FRIENDS ARE 2 NERDS
380
00:29:09,834 --> 00:29:11,459
Yeah, that should be all for me, too.
381
00:29:13,667 --> 00:29:15,209
Dude, what's going on?
382
00:29:22,292 --> 00:29:23,376
Dude!
383
00:29:24,084 --> 00:29:25,084
Dude!
384
00:29:25,834 --> 00:29:27,292
Let's scram, get your shit!
385
00:29:27,417 --> 00:29:28,417
Bro
386
00:29:31,626 --> 00:29:33,209
I feel so dizzy.
387
00:29:33,751 --> 00:29:35,751
Plus, I'm so damn hungry, and,
388
00:29:35,876 --> 00:29:37,876
and all I see is white.
389
00:29:38,501 --> 00:29:41,042
Yes, your eyes do look quite milky.
390
00:29:44,959 --> 00:29:47,959
Then let's open up
that cakehole and see your tongue.
391
00:29:52,709 --> 00:29:53,709
Fuck!
392
00:29:55,042 --> 00:29:56,042
Son
393
00:29:57,042 --> 00:29:59,751
I'll never get this out!
394
00:30:05,292 --> 00:30:08,001
I can't recall ever being
in school so long in the afternoon.
395
00:30:08,251 --> 00:30:12,376
Do you guys hear that Helmut pulled a
fifth-grader up the flagpole in the break?
396
00:30:12,792 --> 00:30:13,417
Really?
397
00:30:13,709 --> 00:30:15,167
Nah, I just made that up.
398
00:30:15,792 --> 00:30:19,001
That's not OK, Torben, just to
feel important by telling tall tales.
399
00:30:19,126 --> 00:30:22,251
Excuse me, I just noticed
things started to get boring, Torsten.
400
00:30:22,376 --> 00:30:24,001
So I figured I'd tell a story.
401
00:30:24,126 --> 00:30:26,126
A made-up story, Torben!
402
00:30:26,251 --> 00:30:28,810
Little Red Riding Hood is also a made-up
story, and still everybody loves it, Torsten!
403
00:30:28,834 --> 00:30:32,251
In Little Red Riding Hood, an innocent
old lady gets mauled by a predator!
404
00:30:32,459 --> 00:30:34,834
- I doubt that kind of story...
- Boys, boys, boys!
405
00:30:34,959 --> 00:30:35,959
Come here!
406
00:30:36,626 --> 00:30:38,292
Is this normal in your school?
407
00:30:41,167 --> 00:30:42,501
What's wrong with them?
408
00:30:42,917 --> 00:30:44,417
Maybe graduation pranks?
409
00:30:47,584 --> 00:30:48,667
Oh my God!
410
00:30:48,917 --> 00:30:52,292
Something terrible
has happened! It can't be stopped!
411
00:30:54,542 --> 00:30:56,126
Save yourselves while you can!
412
00:30:57,584 --> 00:30:59,834
My scrub! My scrub!
413
00:31:14,626 --> 00:31:18,917
OK boys, no matter what
happens now, let's not panic!
414
00:31:19,959 --> 00:31:21,667
He eats brooms! Run!
415
00:31:40,542 --> 00:31:41,542
Freeze!
416
00:31:42,042 --> 00:31:44,209
- I got a gun!
- What the hell are you doing?!
417
00:31:44,459 --> 00:31:46,751
We don't know if she's
infested like the others! Torben?
418
00:31:46,876 --> 00:31:47,334
Yes?
419
00:31:47,459 --> 00:31:49,459
Go to the door
and tell us when the coast is clear!
420
00:31:53,376 --> 00:31:54,167
OK.
421
00:31:54,251 --> 00:31:56,959
Good. Now you put down
that sandwich very slowly, OK?
422
00:31:57,834 --> 00:31:58,834
Very good.
423
00:31:59,251 --> 00:32:02,167
And now turn around slowly.
I'm going to put away my gun.
424
00:32:04,042 --> 00:32:06,042
Omigod, she's infested, too! Kill her!
425
00:32:07,501 --> 00:32:09,834
Leo, she's just not wearing make-up today!
426
00:32:09,959 --> 00:32:14,251
What's gotten into you to scare me like
that?! I thought you were running amok!
427
00:32:14,459 --> 00:32:17,167
- You won't prefer the truth!
- I can't wait to hear it!
428
00:32:17,334 --> 00:32:20,792
- Well, the students turned into...
- Don't say the Z-word!
429
00:32:21,126 --> 00:32:24,001
My father always told me
to just call things as they are. Katrin...
430
00:32:25,084 --> 00:32:26,709
The janitor ate his broom.
431
00:32:28,626 --> 00:32:34,001
OK boys, that sounds exciting, but my
essay is giving me a little more trouble.
432
00:32:34,084 --> 00:32:37,834
So if you don't mind, I'd appreciate
you just not talking to me now, OK?
433
00:32:38,292 --> 00:32:41,412
Good, then just stay there, keep away
from the door and just... hold your beak!
434
00:32:42,834 --> 00:32:44,501
Leo, we gotta get out of here!
435
00:32:44,709 --> 00:32:49,126
Did you forget?! The door's blocked by a
rabid crowd and a broom-eating janitor!
436
00:32:49,501 --> 00:32:51,292
Why are you speaking through your teeth?
437
00:32:51,417 --> 00:32:53,459
That's to emphasize the pickle we're in!
438
00:32:53,709 --> 00:32:54,751
Who's got a phone?
439
00:32:55,459 --> 00:32:56,459
Call the police!
440
00:33:20,209 --> 00:33:21,417
- Fuck!
- Fornicate!
441
00:33:21,542 --> 00:33:22,667
You're both right!
442
00:33:28,126 --> 00:33:29,126
Quiet.
443
00:33:30,459 --> 00:33:31,709
Things seem to be calming down.
444
00:33:36,584 --> 00:33:37,834
Where the hell are you?
445
00:33:38,084 --> 00:33:42,001
I'm calling the fourth time now,
and still nobody's come yet!
446
00:33:42,501 --> 00:33:44,917
Hello? Hello?!
447
00:33:53,667 --> 00:33:55,876
I'm going on strike today, lemme through!
448
00:33:57,126 --> 00:33:58,126
Strike!
449
00:34:00,542 --> 00:34:03,001
Come on, let's go! Past these corpses!
450
00:34:03,501 --> 00:34:04,792
This way!
451
00:34:08,709 --> 00:34:10,417
Omigod! I gotta get out!
452
00:34:11,292 --> 00:34:13,334
Hey people, just so you know
453
00:34:13,876 --> 00:34:16,001
Mrs. Wilkens is fired!
454
00:34:56,917 --> 00:35:00,834
Finally! You must shut down the school now!
455
00:35:01,042 --> 00:35:04,584
The kids all got some strange
disease and are acting like, like...
456
00:35:04,709 --> 00:35:09,001
Like zombies! With some
gastric flu! It's a total nightmare!
457
00:35:09,126 --> 00:35:11,727
Let's keep it short and painless.
How much dope have you been smoking?
458
00:35:11,751 --> 00:35:14,417
I haven't been smoking, for Heaven's sake!
459
00:35:14,542 --> 00:35:18,209
Get the healthy kids out,
and shut down that building!
460
00:35:18,334 --> 00:35:20,126
Why, I'm not liking that tone of yours!
461
00:35:20,251 --> 00:35:23,042
You can be happy we came
at all! Actually, this was our lunch break!
462
00:35:23,167 --> 00:35:26,709
Well, go in there, and convince yourself!
463
00:35:27,459 --> 00:35:28,459
Egon!
464
00:35:29,167 --> 00:35:29,792
Yes sir?
465
00:35:29,917 --> 00:35:32,917
Drug test for this potato-head here,
I'm gonna get my own picture of this!
466
00:35:33,251 --> 00:35:34,376
Yes, commissioner!
467
00:35:36,626 --> 00:35:39,042
Well, then. Whoa, strong biceps!
468
00:35:39,167 --> 00:35:40,626
Yes, I'm a Van Damme fan.
469
00:35:40,959 --> 00:35:44,119
All the better. You're just gonna feel
a little prick, nothing to worry about...
470
00:35:53,376 --> 00:35:56,459
Man! I could swear I
heard sirens out there!
471
00:35:56,876 --> 00:35:58,667
Thank God, then we'll be outta here soon.
472
00:36:04,876 --> 00:36:05,876
Do you mind?
473
00:36:06,376 --> 00:36:07,917
That's a long wiener you got there.
474
00:36:08,501 --> 00:36:09,501
Commissioner?
475
00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:13,667
Question. Just a question.
Shouldn't we have a look into the school?
476
00:36:13,792 --> 00:36:17,376
That's just some gastroenteritis
spooking around, it'll pass in a few days.
477
00:36:17,834 --> 00:36:19,209
Just wait.
478
00:36:19,334 --> 00:36:20,334
Sure.
479
00:36:26,209 --> 00:36:27,209
Leo.
480
00:36:27,917 --> 00:36:28,792
Hang in there.
481
00:36:28,917 --> 00:36:30,917
We've already been in here 15 minutes!
482
00:36:37,292 --> 00:36:40,084
Boys, I think we can try our luck.
483
00:36:40,376 --> 00:36:41,856
I think we scared the pants off them.
484
00:36:53,959 --> 00:36:56,084
Torsten, hand me back my phone.
485
00:36:56,209 --> 00:36:58,542
I wanna try calling 9-1-1 again.
486
00:36:59,626 --> 00:37:00,917
So where is it?
487
00:37:01,459 --> 00:37:02,459
Torsten?
488
00:37:07,959 --> 00:37:11,167
Where's the phone?
It was my grandma's birthday gift to me.
489
00:37:11,917 --> 00:37:12,917
But she's dead now.
490
00:37:13,792 --> 00:37:15,167
I'm gonna write this novel...
491
00:37:15,292 --> 00:37:16,959
Shit, man, I lost it!
492
00:37:17,084 --> 00:37:19,376
I'm dumb! OK?! Sorry!
493
00:37:27,667 --> 00:37:29,001
I say we don't wait any longer.
494
00:37:29,626 --> 00:37:30,876
We fight our way out!
495
00:37:31,209 --> 00:37:33,459
I mean, hello, they're just students!
496
00:37:33,584 --> 00:37:35,126
Ever thought about my allergies?
497
00:37:35,251 --> 00:37:38,251
We don't know anything about their
disease! What if they cause swells on me?
498
00:37:38,417 --> 00:37:40,102
Then I won't fit through
any doors, Torsten!
499
00:37:40,126 --> 00:37:42,417
You're a sissy, Torben, you know that?
500
00:37:42,584 --> 00:37:45,292
I've been through stuff
like this countless times on "Starcraft 2"!
501
00:37:45,417 --> 00:37:48,251
I seriously doubt
"Starcraft 2" has allergy mode, Torsten!
502
00:37:50,042 --> 00:37:50,834
For fuck's sake!
503
00:37:51,001 --> 00:37:54,459
Can you two babble
more quietly?! I can't concentrate!
504
00:37:56,501 --> 00:37:58,084
See, there you go.
505
00:37:58,334 --> 00:38:02,959
Boys, I don't mean to be rude, I just need
to finish here, then I can play along, OK?
506
00:38:03,417 --> 00:38:04,876
Uh, Katrin, keep still now, alright?
507
00:38:05,167 --> 00:38:09,126
Seriously, I got my period this morning,
and you boys are busting my ovaries!
508
00:38:09,251 --> 00:38:12,417
I mean it, Katrin! No sudden movements!
509
00:38:12,542 --> 00:38:13,542
Oh, then what's this?!
510
00:38:15,667 --> 00:38:17,251
Katrin, don't make any noise!
511
00:38:20,084 --> 00:38:21,292
You got a spider in your hair!
512
00:38:21,417 --> 00:38:22,501
Get rid of it!
513
00:38:22,959 --> 00:38:25,709
Look at that beast! Its teeth are foaming!
514
00:38:25,834 --> 00:38:26,709
Is it big?
515
00:38:26,834 --> 00:38:28,459
- Looks kinda like my cousin!
- What?!
516
00:38:28,584 --> 00:38:29,876
Why hasn't it attacked her yet?
517
00:38:30,042 --> 00:38:31,292
Maybe it already ate.
518
00:39:09,001 --> 00:39:10,167
HELENE FISCHER - BREATHLESS
519
00:39:12,542 --> 00:39:13,876
- What's going on here?
- Shut up!
520
00:39:41,292 --> 00:39:42,501
HOW TO FIGHT ZOMBIES
521
00:40:05,084 --> 00:40:06,834
What did you do to the closet?
522
00:40:08,251 --> 00:40:09,417
The spider's inside!
523
00:40:14,292 --> 00:40:16,751
Dude! What's taking the police so long?!
524
00:40:38,251 --> 00:40:40,209
There's gotta be another way out of here!
525
00:40:40,334 --> 00:40:42,876
And you idiot fed my phone to these beasts!
526
00:40:43,126 --> 00:40:45,501
Dear God! It's a telephone!
527
00:40:46,251 --> 00:40:47,334
How does it work?
528
00:40:47,459 --> 00:40:49,376
Must be a new Apple model in retro design.
529
00:40:49,501 --> 00:40:50,709
Ah, then it must have touch.
530
00:40:50,834 --> 00:40:51,667
Where's the "home" button?
531
00:40:51,792 --> 00:40:52,832
Wait, I think you gotta...
532
00:40:56,751 --> 00:40:58,292
It works! It works!
533
00:40:58,417 --> 00:41:00,376
Wow, technology gets crazier by the minute!
534
00:41:25,917 --> 00:41:28,542
Welcome to the police
emergency station, can I take your order?
535
00:41:28,709 --> 00:41:30,042
Thank God! Leo Knows here!
536
00:41:30,167 --> 00:41:33,709
Ah, the kid who switched schools
hoping things would get better there!
537
00:41:34,376 --> 00:41:35,126
I don't believe this.
538
00:41:35,251 --> 00:41:37,959
So, are things better
at the new school? Huh?
539
00:41:38,084 --> 00:41:41,444
Nothing's better here! There's some virus
spreading here! We're stuck in the library!
540
00:41:41,501 --> 00:41:44,876
- Please send...
- Hang on, hang on! Hang on, please!
541
00:41:45,792 --> 00:41:47,917
Is it better there or not? Tell me!
542
00:41:48,667 --> 00:41:52,126
Who gives a damn!
Please send someone to get us out now!
543
00:41:52,292 --> 00:41:55,834
OK, as you wish. I'll connect
you with the specialists at the scene.
544
00:41:56,792 --> 00:41:57,792
No! No!
545
00:42:00,709 --> 00:42:02,084
Commissioner Ronny speaking.
546
00:42:02,209 --> 00:42:05,685
Listen, there are still sane students in here!
We're in the library, up in the top floor!
547
00:42:05,709 --> 00:42:07,209
How dumb are you?! Come on out!
548
00:42:07,334 --> 00:42:10,167
We're trapped! There's zombies
at the door that want to eat us up!
549
00:42:10,292 --> 00:42:12,001
Don't say the Z-word, it's silly!
550
00:42:12,126 --> 00:42:14,959
We're not going in there!
You know how contageous a gastric flu is!
551
00:42:15,167 --> 00:42:17,917
Come to the exit, call me,
and I'll open up for you. End of order.
552
00:42:18,667 --> 00:42:20,334
Hello? Hello?!
553
00:42:20,751 --> 00:42:21,917
Shitfire!
554
00:42:22,084 --> 00:42:24,167
- So what did he say?
- "Shitfire"!
555
00:42:24,292 --> 00:42:25,542
Not him, the policeman!
556
00:42:25,834 --> 00:42:28,042
They're not coming,
they don't want to catch the flu!
557
00:42:30,126 --> 00:42:31,167
This isn't happening!
558
00:42:32,167 --> 00:42:34,376
Why didn't we just leave after school?
559
00:42:34,709 --> 00:42:38,209
We could have googled
the stuff for our essays at home! Fuck!
560
00:42:38,667 --> 00:42:41,667
- We're all gonna die!
- Don't speak of the devil, he'll show up!
561
00:42:42,042 --> 00:42:43,417
I ain't taking orders from you!
562
00:42:58,709 --> 00:43:01,917
Dima and Sascha still look pretty drunk.
563
00:43:04,959 --> 00:43:05,959
Guys
564
00:43:08,084 --> 00:43:09,167
I think I have it.
565
00:43:09,542 --> 00:43:10,709
My phone?!
566
00:43:11,501 --> 00:43:12,542
The punch!
567
00:43:13,376 --> 00:43:15,501
They all had some of that blue punch!
568
00:43:15,667 --> 00:43:18,001
There was something
wrong with it! I didn't have any!
569
00:43:18,126 --> 00:43:20,167
- Me neither.
- Me neither.
570
00:43:23,459 --> 00:43:24,584
Me neither.
571
00:43:27,042 --> 00:43:28,042
Jenny?
572
00:43:29,876 --> 00:43:31,236
What are y'all looking at me for?!
573
00:43:31,376 --> 00:43:33,042
I didn't drink any either!
574
00:43:33,542 --> 00:43:35,459
That's why we're still healthy.
575
00:43:35,626 --> 00:43:39,501
Someone must have put something in the
punch. That doesn't look normal out there.
576
00:43:39,626 --> 00:43:42,042
That's what I mean! They look like zom...
577
00:43:43,709 --> 00:43:44,542
Yes!
578
00:43:44,709 --> 00:43:45,709
Zombies!
579
00:43:49,584 --> 00:43:50,626
I slept with Tanja.
580
00:43:51,334 --> 00:43:55,334
Chill, boys. There must have been something
in the punch that attacks human brain cells.
581
00:43:55,667 --> 00:43:57,417
Provided there are any, of course.
582
00:43:57,542 --> 00:44:01,751
Some kind of
virus that... yeah, makes you stupid.
583
00:44:01,876 --> 00:44:04,292
Of course unless you were already stupid.
584
00:44:04,459 --> 00:44:07,667
Retarded. The virus
would have no effect on dummies.
585
00:44:07,917 --> 00:44:11,001
So everybody who's dumb is not infected.
586
00:44:13,542 --> 00:44:14,542
Shit!
587
00:44:15,292 --> 00:44:17,167
They figured out how to open doors!
588
00:44:17,292 --> 00:44:20,334
You removed the chair! The chair!
589
00:44:20,459 --> 00:44:21,667
Pull!
590
00:44:57,501 --> 00:44:58,751
Let's get out! Out, out, out!
591
00:45:04,959 --> 00:45:06,251
My cell phone!
592
00:45:32,459 --> 00:45:33,792
That's genius!
593
00:45:34,376 --> 00:45:35,876
Let's hope all zombies have Lovoo.
594
00:45:36,001 --> 00:45:38,709
Of course they have
it. Even if they deny it.
595
00:46:02,209 --> 00:46:03,209
Cool, moving on.
596
00:46:11,001 --> 00:46:12,876
Oh, no. Oh, no!
597
00:46:14,834 --> 00:46:15,834
Come.
598
00:46:31,834 --> 00:46:33,584
Almost made it. There's the entrance.
599
00:46:38,084 --> 00:46:39,626
We should have guessed!
600
00:46:50,334 --> 00:46:51,334
In here!
601
00:47:03,792 --> 00:47:06,001
I'm really sorry I didn't believe you.
602
00:47:06,501 --> 00:47:08,126
No sweat, I wouldn't have either.
603
00:47:08,834 --> 00:47:12,001
Good thing I came up
with the spider, or you might have been...
604
00:47:12,626 --> 00:47:13,626
What?
605
00:47:13,751 --> 00:47:15,209
You made that up?
606
00:47:16,292 --> 00:47:17,292
For me?
607
00:47:17,917 --> 00:47:19,792
Oh Leo, that's so romantic!
608
00:47:20,876 --> 00:47:21,876
I hate spiders!
609
00:47:22,042 --> 00:47:24,251
Oh, you two are so cute. Now let's get out!
610
00:47:24,376 --> 00:47:26,251
He's right! Get up fast, you fat bitch!
611
00:47:34,709 --> 00:47:39,126
You! Stay where you are
until the virus wears off! That's an order!
612
00:47:39,584 --> 00:47:43,251
She's no zombie!
She's just not wearing make-up today!
613
00:47:43,376 --> 00:47:45,251
And she's on her period!
614
00:47:45,459 --> 00:47:48,126
Alright, men! Then release the dogs!
615
00:47:57,251 --> 00:47:59,584
OK boys, bag this joint!
616
00:48:17,167 --> 00:48:18,959
Boys, we need some more Bruzzzler!
617
00:48:23,126 --> 00:48:24,376
What's going on now?!
618
00:48:27,626 --> 00:48:29,584
Tenting houses is so 90's!
619
00:48:31,042 --> 00:48:32,792
Not again quarantine!
620
00:48:32,959 --> 00:48:34,359
I gotta go through that every week!
621
00:48:34,584 --> 00:48:37,084
I can't take it any longer!
622
00:48:37,251 --> 00:48:38,251
Katrin!
623
00:48:38,292 --> 00:48:42,376
- Calm down! You have to calm down!
- Hey, let me take care of it.
624
00:48:42,709 --> 00:48:45,834
Calm down, Katrin! Relax!
625
00:49:01,667 --> 00:49:06,792
2 men to the main entrance, 4 men secure
the east and west wing, 2 men on the roof!
626
00:49:12,917 --> 00:49:14,251
Sorry, it's all Spanish to me!
627
00:49:14,376 --> 00:49:15,792
- That was Spanish.
- Yes sir!
628
00:49:16,292 --> 00:49:17,959
Commissioner Ronny here, what's up?
629
00:49:18,084 --> 00:49:21,459
The opposite
of "down". But that doesn't matter.
630
00:49:21,626 --> 00:49:25,792
We were assigned by the decontamination
squad to put a quarantine under the school.
631
00:49:25,917 --> 00:49:30,709
- Why the fuss, it's just gastro...
- Shut up, it's my jurisdiction now! So...
632
00:49:31,209 --> 00:49:34,084
Zip it, Zippy. Pack your shit and leave!
633
00:49:34,209 --> 00:49:36,667
We're done for the day, men! Party time!
634
00:49:36,792 --> 00:49:39,001
Thank God, I won't miss my series!
635
00:49:49,917 --> 00:49:52,959
Commissioner, what's
your official position?
636
00:49:53,084 --> 00:49:54,542
Commission position is as follows...
637
00:49:55,167 --> 00:49:58,334
A tenacious gastric flu has
spread in the Friedrich Hebbel School.
638
00:49:58,667 --> 00:50:00,852
So as a precaution,
the school was placed under quarantine.
639
00:50:00,876 --> 00:50:06,501
Commissioner, is it true that you were called
by trapped students, but refused to help?
640
00:50:08,376 --> 00:50:09,376
No.
641
00:50:10,417 --> 00:50:11,917
Commissioner, I have a question!
642
00:50:12,209 --> 00:50:16,876
What's the first thermodynamic law
considering Einstein's relativity theory?
643
00:50:18,209 --> 00:50:19,209
Just kidding.
644
00:50:19,292 --> 00:50:22,959
What's the second thermodynamic law
considering Einstein's relativity theory?
645
00:50:24,042 --> 00:50:25,042
OK...
646
00:50:25,084 --> 00:50:30,376
Is the rumor true that a cowboy is about
to be chased across the yard by an Indian?
647
00:50:30,584 --> 00:50:32,251
These rumors seem made up.
648
00:50:38,292 --> 00:50:40,084
Yes, but I don't understand the parents.
649
00:50:40,167 --> 00:50:41,167
Commissioner...
650
00:50:42,251 --> 00:50:45,792
A dairy cow delivers 4,500 liters a year.
651
00:50:46,042 --> 00:50:48,417
Farmer Muller has 19 dairy cows.
652
00:50:48,584 --> 00:50:53,542
He claims to have
delivered 100,000 liters of milk last year.
653
00:50:53,667 --> 00:50:56,251
Is this true? Please
explain in written form.
654
00:50:57,001 --> 00:51:01,042
You surely understand that the issue
is top secret and I cannot testify to it.
655
00:51:01,167 --> 00:51:02,376
Besides, I'm off duty now.
656
00:51:03,167 --> 00:51:04,542
Go ask the chancellor over there.
657
00:51:05,209 --> 00:51:06,449
The chancellor! The chancellor!
658
00:51:08,126 --> 00:51:11,959
Chancellor! Panic, discontent
and diarrhea are plaguing Wesselburen.
659
00:51:12,376 --> 00:51:15,792
Could you resolve this situation for us?
660
00:51:16,042 --> 00:51:16,792
What's going on here?!
661
00:51:16,917 --> 00:51:21,417
The SWAT team ensured me
that things are under total control.
662
00:51:21,667 --> 00:51:26,376
It is not necessary to
evacuate Wesselburen.
663
00:51:26,792 --> 00:51:31,334
We could prevent worse by acting quickly.
664
00:51:31,876 --> 00:51:39,876
Even the mayor and the decontamination
squad stated there is no reason to panic.
665
00:51:41,042 --> 00:51:45,376
Everything is running
as planned and has its order.
666
00:51:45,501 --> 00:51:46,751
Ice! Ice!
667
00:51:48,084 --> 00:51:49,084
Chocolate?!
668
00:51:51,251 --> 00:51:53,959
- And what if it doesn't work?
- It's gonna work, definitely.
669
00:51:54,667 --> 00:51:58,251
In every zombie movie they disguise
as zombies and sneak past the crowd.
670
00:51:58,376 --> 00:52:01,376
- You and your Z-word!
- And what can we disguise ourselves with?
671
00:52:01,501 --> 00:52:04,459
I dunno, we need some kind
of paint to make our faces look pale.
672
00:52:04,792 --> 00:52:05,792
THEATER ROOM
673
00:52:06,084 --> 00:52:07,524
Maybe we'll find something in there!
674
00:52:08,959 --> 00:52:12,126
Shit, it's locked.
I'll have to break it open then.
675
00:52:13,334 --> 00:52:16,209
Let me do that.
You know I'm stronger, don't you, Torben?
676
00:52:16,334 --> 00:52:18,251
So?! I can still try!
677
00:52:18,376 --> 00:52:21,459
Torben, now's not
the right time to "try" things!
678
00:52:21,917 --> 00:52:24,501
In exceptional situations
you always suppress me, Torsten!
679
00:52:24,626 --> 00:52:29,751
Really, Torben? Who gave you his last
Star Wars card? That was me, Torben!
680
00:52:29,876 --> 00:52:34,459
You just hoped I'd give you Yoda,
Leia Organa or Captain Panaka, Torsten!
681
00:52:38,292 --> 00:52:39,542
Fuck, boys!
682
00:52:41,917 --> 00:52:42,917
Shall we?
683
00:52:47,626 --> 00:52:49,792
Well, lookie here, we got company.
684
00:52:51,542 --> 00:52:52,542
Perle!
685
00:52:52,792 --> 00:52:56,334
Blow me, the dumbest
guy in this school is still healthy.
686
00:52:56,709 --> 00:52:59,042
Yeah, crazy. But good for you, Helmut.
687
00:52:59,792 --> 00:53:01,292
What are you up to in here?
688
00:53:01,417 --> 00:53:04,751
We were getting some cardboard for
philosophy class with Mr. Salamanda,
689
00:53:05,042 --> 00:53:08,917
but then we heard those mutant fuckers
coming into the teachers' room,
690
00:53:09,042 --> 00:53:10,643
and we couldn't leave through the window,
691
00:53:10,667 --> 00:53:14,251
then the mood was all fucked up,
so we came in here and locked up.
692
00:53:14,626 --> 00:53:15,792
Mr. Salamanda?
693
00:53:16,376 --> 00:53:17,917
- You OK?
- Who is that?
694
00:53:18,042 --> 00:53:19,959
Mr. Salamanda, our philosophy teacher.
695
00:53:20,209 --> 00:53:21,584
He can't talk.
696
00:53:21,876 --> 00:53:23,209
- He can't talk?
- Right.
697
00:53:23,334 --> 00:53:25,209
He's our philosophy teacher and can't talk?
698
00:53:25,334 --> 00:53:27,292
Right, he communicates with that bell.
699
00:53:27,417 --> 00:53:29,001
And he wants to tell us something.
700
00:53:29,126 --> 00:53:32,626
Mr. Salamanda, do you know
something about this virus?
701
00:53:34,917 --> 00:53:37,376
Do you know who's responsible for it?
702
00:53:39,751 --> 00:53:42,042
Tell us who did it!
703
00:53:42,751 --> 00:53:46,167
Perle! He can only answer yes or no!
704
00:53:46,751 --> 00:53:51,584
Mr. Salamanda,
is the responsible person... in this room?
705
00:53:53,792 --> 00:53:56,251
Who - is - it?
706
00:53:57,709 --> 00:53:58,709
Is it her?
707
00:53:59,417 --> 00:54:00,834
No, no, that was me!
708
00:54:01,376 --> 00:54:02,376
What?!
709
00:54:02,417 --> 00:54:03,959
No, the bell!
710
00:54:04,459 --> 00:54:05,584
Not the poison!
711
00:54:06,084 --> 00:54:07,084
Poison?!
712
00:54:07,126 --> 00:54:08,876
How'd you know it was poison?
713
00:54:09,334 --> 00:54:11,001
Mr. Salamanda, was it Helmut?
714
00:54:14,709 --> 00:54:16,459
May I, may I pass? Thanks, thanks.
715
00:54:18,626 --> 00:54:20,584
Was... was it Katrin?
716
00:54:23,042 --> 00:54:24,042
My cell phone!
717
00:54:24,126 --> 00:54:25,626
Forgot to hang up on the cops.
718
00:54:25,751 --> 00:54:26,751
Torben!
719
00:54:31,751 --> 00:54:32,751
Was it Torben?
720
00:54:35,292 --> 00:54:37,626
Ice cream! Yummy ice cream!
721
00:54:38,251 --> 00:54:39,667
The ice man is here!
722
00:54:42,251 --> 00:54:43,792
Did Leo poison the punch?
723
00:54:50,334 --> 00:54:52,917
Guys, we gotta hurry,
we gotta put on make-up and scram!
724
00:55:12,292 --> 00:55:13,292
Bring 'em on!
725
00:55:18,917 --> 00:55:20,209
Perle, come on, hurry!
726
00:55:20,417 --> 00:55:22,459
No, Leo, I'm not coming!
727
00:55:24,167 --> 00:55:25,167
What?
728
00:55:25,334 --> 00:55:27,417
My gal and I, we're staying here!
729
00:55:27,584 --> 00:55:28,584
No!
730
00:55:29,001 --> 00:55:30,126
I'm not going without you...
731
00:55:30,251 --> 00:55:31,959
OK, she's more into me, bye!
732
00:55:35,667 --> 00:55:40,959
A mysterious virus has spread
at the Friedrich Hebbel School.
733
00:55:42,876 --> 00:55:45,667
Nice to run the right school.
734
00:55:46,376 --> 00:55:48,876
Honey, do you know where the keys are?
735
00:55:49,001 --> 00:55:52,167
The gardener hasn't been fed for a week.
736
00:55:52,542 --> 00:55:54,834
I think I left it in the office.
737
00:55:55,542 --> 00:55:58,459
Heinke, get over here. You must see this.
738
00:56:02,001 --> 00:56:04,959
Dear Lord. That looks awful!
739
00:56:05,084 --> 00:56:06,084
I know.
740
00:56:06,542 --> 00:56:08,584
We need a new TV set.
741
00:56:55,417 --> 00:56:56,959
You gotta take a bite.
742
00:56:57,292 --> 00:56:58,917
You take a bite!
743
00:56:59,251 --> 00:57:02,376
I'm allergic to toilet brushes.
744
00:57:10,959 --> 00:57:11,959
Mint?
745
00:57:38,876 --> 00:57:40,792
- You idiot!
- I'm sorry!
746
00:57:50,459 --> 00:57:52,084
Helmut, open up!
747
00:57:52,501 --> 00:57:54,917
You insult our momma, you on your own!
748
00:57:55,709 --> 00:57:56,709
Come on, let's go!
749
00:57:58,292 --> 00:58:00,209
You stupid bitch!
750
00:58:03,292 --> 00:58:04,292
Wait!
751
00:58:05,126 --> 00:58:06,542
Fine. Use it or lose it.
752
00:58:34,084 --> 00:58:35,584
This way! Faster!
753
00:58:35,834 --> 00:58:37,626
Omigod, a banana peel!
754
00:58:49,709 --> 00:58:50,751
To the toilet! Fast!
755
00:58:50,876 --> 00:58:52,917
You can go pipi later, Torben! This way!
756
00:58:59,917 --> 00:59:00,917
Let's try the toilet.
757
00:59:01,167 --> 00:59:03,542
- Leo, hurry!
- Go without me! I can't make it!
758
00:59:03,709 --> 00:59:05,876
Leo, of course you
can! I'll help you, come!
759
00:59:06,001 --> 00:59:07,751
Go to the toilet, lock the door!
760
00:59:08,126 --> 00:59:10,667
- But the zombies are...
- Go without me!
761
00:59:14,167 --> 00:59:16,626
Bye, see you tomorrow!
762
00:59:16,751 --> 00:59:17,751
Come!
763
00:59:17,917 --> 00:59:18,917
Katrin!
764
00:59:22,917 --> 00:59:23,917
In the stalls!
765
00:59:37,042 --> 00:59:40,001
I tell you, don't count
your chickens before they're hatched.
766
00:59:48,751 --> 00:59:49,876
It's OK, Katrin.
767
00:59:50,584 --> 00:59:52,459
We gotta stay strong now, OK?
768
00:59:57,376 --> 00:59:59,542
Why?!
769
01:00:01,209 --> 01:00:02,584
Leo was a great person.
770
01:00:04,709 --> 01:00:07,126
Without him
we wouldn't have made it this far.
771
01:00:09,542 --> 01:00:11,542
I think he fell on purpose
772
01:00:12,001 --> 01:00:14,667
to stall the zombies and save our lives.
773
01:00:16,167 --> 01:00:17,376
He's our hero.
774
01:00:19,042 --> 01:00:20,917
You don't find many of those out there.
775
01:00:22,417 --> 01:00:24,001
He said
776
01:00:25,042 --> 01:00:26,917
I got a spider in my hair.
777
01:00:52,167 --> 01:00:53,334
You hear that?
778
01:01:02,376 --> 01:01:03,459
Torben!
779
01:01:33,959 --> 01:01:37,792
We're walking... heads... heads... and...
780
01:01:38,667 --> 01:01:42,042
You're doing great! Very good! Awesome!
781
01:01:42,417 --> 01:01:45,167
And we're shaking, shaking our hand...
782
01:01:45,292 --> 01:01:48,501
And we're waving, waving downwards...
783
01:01:49,001 --> 01:01:50,001
Hey!
784
01:01:50,459 --> 01:01:52,501
We're taking a break, everybody back.
785
01:01:52,626 --> 01:01:55,667
What did I teach you,
Doc, we don't eat our CD's!
786
01:01:55,792 --> 01:01:57,834
And no pop songs,
they'll get you nauseated.
787
01:01:58,126 --> 01:02:00,042
Thank God you're alright!
788
01:02:01,542 --> 01:02:02,917
What happened, Leo?
789
01:02:03,042 --> 01:02:04,792
The question is what didn't happen!
790
01:02:04,917 --> 01:02:07,417
They were never after us to eat us!
791
01:02:07,751 --> 01:02:11,042
They were just
damn hungry and not so bright anymore.
792
01:02:16,459 --> 01:02:18,209
But one of them wanted to eat his arm.
793
01:02:18,667 --> 01:02:21,876
I bet they thought
his anti-allergy-pills were dextrose candy.
794
01:02:22,292 --> 01:02:23,292
Great!
795
01:02:23,667 --> 01:02:24,876
And I ate toilet brush!
796
01:02:25,001 --> 01:02:28,084
OK, I get it,
but why the hell are you dancing with them.
797
01:02:28,251 --> 01:02:29,709
I had a little chat with them.
798
01:02:29,959 --> 01:02:34,917
And I figured out that when you teach them
shit, their brain cells reproduce again.
799
01:02:35,292 --> 01:02:37,876
If all you do is run away screaming,
what are they to learn but,
800
01:02:38,001 --> 01:02:39,667
"OK, I'm a zombie, so..."
801
01:02:41,084 --> 01:02:45,334
If that's the case, you gotta teach them
back everything important and they're healed?
802
01:02:45,459 --> 01:02:48,959
Well, speech worked fine.
Now we're doing motor skills.
803
01:02:49,334 --> 01:02:50,751
They can speak again?
804
01:02:51,167 --> 01:02:53,834
Well, not these ones yet, but... Mark?
805
01:02:54,251 --> 01:02:56,051
Wow, he's getting the
color back in his face.
806
01:02:56,167 --> 01:02:58,542
Mark, introduce yourself
to my friends, huh?
807
01:02:59,292 --> 01:03:00,917
Hi, I'm Mark.
808
01:03:01,167 --> 01:03:05,042
Sorry, I'm a bit confused
by this circus but
809
01:03:05,334 --> 01:03:09,292
when a cow
sitteth on the pasture, there's cake!
810
01:03:09,709 --> 01:03:11,209
We have a new pope, don't we?
811
01:03:11,876 --> 01:03:15,376
Some brains
need a bit longer to sort the words right.
812
01:03:15,667 --> 01:03:17,542
- Thank you, Mark!
- Potato salad!
813
01:03:20,917 --> 01:03:23,334
If we do this, we'll get back out.
814
01:03:23,459 --> 01:03:24,792
As national heroes!
815
01:03:24,917 --> 01:03:26,626
I say each of us gets a group,
816
01:03:26,751 --> 01:03:28,310
then we bring
these bastards back to life, OK?
817
01:03:28,334 --> 01:03:29,709
It all sounds so stupid!
818
01:03:29,876 --> 01:03:30,876
I know.
819
01:03:31,209 --> 01:03:33,209
But the movie's title
should have been clue enough.
820
01:03:33,959 --> 01:03:36,417
I used to be a little loser,
821
01:03:39,709 --> 01:03:41,834
They underestimated me.
822
01:03:43,334 --> 01:03:44,626
No eating.
823
01:03:44,751 --> 01:03:47,709
On YouTube I was bullied by users.
824
01:03:50,792 --> 01:03:52,834
Now I'll show what I've got in me.
825
01:03:56,542 --> 01:03:59,001
People, do you want to change things?
826
01:04:02,209 --> 01:04:04,501
Listen and do as / do.
827
01:04:07,751 --> 01:04:10,334
Inspite of all the odds against things,
828
01:04:13,334 --> 01:04:15,709
! have some good advice for you.
829
01:04:15,834 --> 01:04:18,667
Vitamins. Eat. Eat!
830
01:04:24,459 --> 01:04:26,001
Potato salad!
831
01:04:27,126 --> 01:04:28,667
Potato salad!
832
01:04:28,959 --> 01:04:30,709
Good job, you can read now!
833
01:04:45,001 --> 01:04:46,626
THE DAY AFTER THE OUTBREAK
834
01:04:46,751 --> 01:04:49,209
I blacked out, they were all fucked up,
835
01:04:49,334 --> 01:04:53,459
and this zombie invasion made me miss
seeing my doctor about my hail damage.
836
01:04:53,917 --> 01:04:56,126
The cellulite's fucking me up every day.
837
01:04:56,251 --> 01:04:59,209
I wanted to go fitness, too,
because of my annual rings,
838
01:04:59,334 --> 01:05:02,626
because my jug holder
won't always be able to carry the weight.
839
01:05:02,751 --> 01:05:04,334
Did you see my man?
840
01:05:04,459 --> 01:05:06,251
I don't wanna go to jail!
841
01:05:07,459 --> 01:05:09,042
Would someone hand him a tissue?
842
01:05:09,167 --> 01:05:11,542
I have nothing to do with all this!
843
01:05:11,751 --> 01:05:12,834
I regret nothing.
844
01:05:12,959 --> 01:05:17,251
My ass was on the line!
This was no pony lick!
845
01:05:17,417 --> 01:05:18,542
I wasn't drinking!
846
01:05:18,667 --> 01:05:20,626
The only instinct they had was hunger.
847
01:05:22,084 --> 01:05:23,709
Can I, can I go home?
848
01:05:23,834 --> 01:05:25,959
I need booze. Booze!
849
01:05:27,417 --> 01:05:28,917
You're nervous, right?
850
01:05:30,084 --> 01:05:32,501
No, I'm Torben. But it's OK.
851
01:05:32,626 --> 01:05:34,709
At first I didn't believe them...
852
01:05:35,667 --> 01:05:36,667
Fuck!
853
01:05:37,459 --> 01:05:39,334
I left my essay in the library!
854
01:05:39,667 --> 01:05:41,542
Ever seen "The Walking Dead"?
855
01:05:41,667 --> 01:05:43,084
That's the way it was!
856
01:05:43,209 --> 01:05:46,417
They just didn't
want our brains, but our sandwiches!
857
01:05:46,834 --> 01:05:47,834
Leo found that out.
858
01:05:47,917 --> 01:05:49,709
Well, well, together with me... Well...
859
01:05:50,292 --> 01:05:52,209
Me, uh... I found it out.
860
01:05:52,334 --> 01:05:55,167
Without Leo, we'd all be dead by now.
861
01:05:56,167 --> 01:05:58,792
Nah, maybe not dead,
but definitely still in that school,
862
01:05:58,917 --> 01:06:02,417
and more than 24 hours in school,
I'm telling you, you wish you were dead!
863
01:06:03,876 --> 01:06:06,751
Well, boy, you seem to be a real hero.
864
01:06:07,001 --> 01:06:07,626
Thanks.
865
01:06:07,751 --> 01:06:11,751
Hang on, are you the Leo Knows
who recently switched schools
866
01:06:11,876 --> 01:06:14,042
- hoping things would get better there?
- Yes.
867
01:06:14,167 --> 01:06:17,292
They should change the
school's name to "Leo Knows Much School".
868
01:06:23,417 --> 01:06:24,959
- Gum?
- Thanks, I quit.
869
01:06:25,209 --> 01:06:26,709
Yeah, much better that way.
870
01:06:26,834 --> 01:06:28,584
Now to you, Mr. Salamanda.
871
01:06:29,292 --> 01:06:30,417
Start talking.
872
01:06:30,751 --> 01:06:32,542
What did you observe that day?
873
01:06:36,209 --> 01:06:40,917
Mr. Salamanda, you're
preventing police work. If you please!
874
01:06:41,251 --> 01:06:42,917
Mr. Salamanda, we can get bad.
875
01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:44,917
Yeah...
876
01:06:45,834 --> 01:06:48,042
We could flashy-thing you.
877
01:06:49,876 --> 01:06:50,876
Alright.
878
01:06:50,917 --> 01:06:53,917
Make your pick.
Stretching bank? Waterboarding?
879
01:06:54,667 --> 01:06:56,501
Good. I'll get water and a rag.
880
01:06:57,001 --> 01:06:57,501
In a sec.
881
01:06:57,626 --> 01:06:58,626
Wait, wait, wait
882
01:07:00,251 --> 01:07:01,251
Mr. Salamanda...
883
01:07:01,917 --> 01:07:03,251
You can't speak, can you?
884
01:07:05,626 --> 01:07:08,751
You communicate just
with that little bell, right?
885
01:07:12,584 --> 01:07:13,584
Mr. Salamanda...
886
01:07:13,917 --> 01:07:17,959
Do you know how
this virus spread among the students?
887
01:07:19,292 --> 01:07:22,167
Do you know who poisoned the students?
888
01:07:26,751 --> 01:07:27,751
Mr. Salamanda...
889
01:07:27,792 --> 01:07:29,501
Who poisoned the students?
890
01:07:34,042 --> 01:07:35,459
He's giving us the finger!
891
01:07:35,917 --> 01:07:40,042
Bitching in his pants and shitting around,
that's all these seniors are good at!
892
01:07:40,167 --> 01:07:43,251
He can't even bitch around!
And we can give ourselves the finger!
893
01:07:43,376 --> 01:07:44,417
Mr. Salamanda, goodbye!
894
01:07:45,667 --> 01:07:49,292
Mr. Salamanda, enough! Your show's over!
895
01:07:49,376 --> 01:07:53,584
Your left eye is hanging out,
but it seems you can do without.
896
01:07:54,542 --> 01:07:55,959
Are you a zombie?
897
01:07:57,292 --> 01:08:01,667
Donating organs would be nuts
because inside you are no guts.
898
01:08:02,834 --> 01:08:03,959
Are you a zombie?
899
01:08:05,542 --> 01:08:09,626
The girls, they run away and shriek
because your eye has a leak.
900
01:08:10,626 --> 01:08:12,167
Are you a zombie?
901
01:08:14,292 --> 01:08:18,126
But your time will come in a few days.
902
01:08:18,376 --> 01:08:20,334
You're all gonna see.
903
01:08:21,751 --> 01:08:23,667
Please don't ask.
904
01:08:26,251 --> 01:08:31,334
Leonardus Blancus the first,
I hereby knight you today.
905
01:08:43,542 --> 01:08:45,334
Leo, you saved us all.
906
01:08:45,667 --> 01:08:47,709
Without you, we'd all be zombies by now.
907
01:08:49,792 --> 01:08:51,251
You're the hottest stud.
908
01:09:09,417 --> 01:09:10,417
Leo!
909
01:09:10,584 --> 01:09:12,251
Hey, what are they doing there?
910
01:09:12,542 --> 01:09:14,001
Well, you were knighted.
911
01:09:16,334 --> 01:09:19,542
Dear peer... Yes, I saved the school.
912
01:09:19,709 --> 01:09:23,084
And yes, the rumors are true,
I have slept with Helene Fischer.
913
01:09:23,584 --> 01:09:26,709
But please, just treat me like before.
914
01:09:28,001 --> 01:09:29,834
Maybe a little nicer, thank you.
915
01:09:31,417 --> 01:09:32,417
Maybe we should move on.
916
01:09:32,792 --> 01:09:34,209
My name is Torben!
917
01:09:34,334 --> 01:09:36,001
I'm counted as a loser in this school,
918
01:09:36,126 --> 01:09:41,042
although many girls have slept with me
because of my allergic reaction during sex.
919
01:09:41,751 --> 01:09:42,751
Today
920
01:09:42,876 --> 01:09:43,876
I too want to
921
01:09:45,126 --> 01:09:46,126
be cool.
922
01:09:46,751 --> 01:09:48,084
I'll begin alphabetically.
923
01:09:48,459 --> 01:09:49,459
They were
924
01:09:49,917 --> 01:09:53,917
Alena, Alia, Alicia, Alina, Amelie, Andrea,
925
01:09:54,042 --> 01:09:57,292
Anita, Anja, Anna, Anneke, Annika...
926
01:09:57,792 --> 01:09:59,834
It was the greatest day in my life.
927
01:09:59,959 --> 01:10:02,667
Finally I had what I had always wanted.
928
01:10:02,792 --> 01:10:03,792
Recognition.
929
01:10:05,376 --> 01:10:06,376
Respect.
930
01:10:06,626 --> 01:10:07,626
Cheese.
931
01:10:07,751 --> 01:10:08,751
Friends.
932
01:10:09,542 --> 01:10:10,542
Well..
933
01:10:10,917 --> 01:10:11,959
Almost everything.
934
01:10:30,709 --> 01:10:31,709
I'll go change.
935
01:10:32,167 --> 01:10:33,167
Good luck.
936
01:10:35,751 --> 01:10:37,459
- Hi.
- Hi.
937
01:10:38,042 --> 01:10:39,459
Hey.
938
01:10:40,376 --> 01:10:42,917
- Did you hear about Perle and Helmut?
- No, what?
939
01:10:43,042 --> 01:10:47,542
Well, Perle broke up 'cause Helmut traded
her engagement ring for a PS4 game.
940
01:10:47,959 --> 01:10:48,667
That's something.
941
01:10:48,792 --> 01:10:51,626
Yeah, and they're both
quite sorry they treated you so bad.
942
01:10:51,751 --> 01:10:52,917
It's OK, no big deal.
943
01:10:53,126 --> 01:10:55,709
Yeah. Well, what I wanted to ask you...
944
01:10:55,917 --> 01:10:59,292
Well, after the spring ball
comes the summer ball, and...
945
01:10:59,751 --> 01:11:01,709
Well, you go there in pairs...
946
01:11:02,251 --> 01:11:04,001
And I don't have anyone go go with yet...
947
01:11:04,626 --> 01:11:06,084
So I wanted to ask you...
948
01:11:06,751 --> 01:11:08,917
You think Helmut would go with me?
949
01:11:10,584 --> 01:11:13,376
Well, I mean,
Perle broke up with Helmut and...
950
01:11:13,584 --> 01:11:16,542
Well, he might just say yes.
You think he'll say yes?
951
01:11:16,959 --> 01:11:19,792
- Sure, absolutely! Yes!
- Really? Really?!
952
01:11:20,001 --> 01:11:25,959
Oh, you're the best! Come here!
953
01:11:28,001 --> 01:11:29,459
Best friends forever!
954
01:11:47,876 --> 01:11:50,751
Dear Leo, with this letter
I wish to apologize to you.
955
01:11:51,042 --> 01:11:54,876
Actually I symbolically wish to
apologize to all whom I've harmed.
956
01:11:55,251 --> 01:11:57,751
! made no friends with my heinous ways.
957
01:11:58,084 --> 01:12:02,709
To the contrary, I isolated myself
and thought that everyone respected me.
958
01:12:03,084 --> 01:12:05,792
All along,
I pretended to be something I'm not.
959
01:12:06,292 --> 01:12:11,917
You showed me how important it is
to be yourself, and not be ashamed of it.
960
01:12:12,542 --> 01:12:14,376
And that's what I will
do by this letter now.
961
01:12:14,709 --> 01:12:18,084
Which is why I ask you,
will you go to the summer ball with me?
962
01:12:18,209 --> 01:12:20,626
Yours, butterfly-stomachedly, Helmut.
963
01:12:22,001 --> 01:12:25,584
And that's how
everything turned out to be my perfect day.
964
01:12:26,084 --> 01:12:30,917
The day was like a hot chocolate
with crumbles on a warm, soft cookie.
965
01:12:31,626 --> 01:12:35,542
If I'd known the cream topping
was heading for my school this second,
966
01:12:36,167 --> 01:12:37,667
! would have cried for joy.
967
01:12:45,417 --> 01:12:48,042
This is one big catch. Are you ready?
968
01:12:48,167 --> 01:12:49,167
Course I'm ready.
969
01:12:53,042 --> 01:12:54,042
What's wrong with you?
970
01:13:00,501 --> 01:13:04,042
Barbara, Beate,
Beatrice, Berrit, Berta...
971
01:13:08,792 --> 01:13:11,167
LEO KNOWS EVERYTHING SCHOOL
972
01:13:26,501 --> 01:13:27,751
Good morning. Are you Heinke?
973
01:13:27,959 --> 01:13:28,959
Yes?
974
01:13:29,167 --> 01:13:30,334
Nice name. Keep it.
975
01:13:31,292 --> 01:13:33,751
Could you please explain what's going on?
976
01:13:34,126 --> 01:13:36,001
Oh, nothing, it's just that you're quite
977
01:13:36,292 --> 01:13:37,709
sexay!
978
01:13:38,001 --> 01:13:40,852
Uh, we're looking for the Elite High
School's principal, we have a warrant.
979
01:13:40,876 --> 01:13:41,917
We got a warrant.
980
01:13:42,042 --> 01:13:43,310
We reacted to an anonymous call and
981
01:13:43,334 --> 01:13:46,667
found the chemicals in his desk that
caused the virus at the Hebbel School.
982
01:13:46,792 --> 01:13:48,042
Desk caused.
983
01:13:48,167 --> 01:13:50,667
- Shut up, Willi. Enough stupidity here.
- Much stupidity.
984
01:13:50,792 --> 01:13:53,792
That's total bullshit.
My husband would never do such a thing.
985
01:13:54,626 --> 01:13:55,792
Oh yes, yes, yes.
986
01:13:56,042 --> 01:13:57,042
Where
987
01:13:57,959 --> 01:13:58,959
is your husband
988
01:13:59,251 --> 01:14:00,251
right now?
989
01:14:01,292 --> 01:14:02,334
Leo Knows!
990
01:14:02,959 --> 01:14:04,126
Professor Kraemer!
991
01:14:04,417 --> 01:14:05,917
I expected you here earlier.
992
01:14:06,042 --> 01:14:09,167
Your father's
a chemist! The virus is from you!
993
01:14:11,376 --> 01:14:13,417
What kind of game are you playing here?
994
01:14:13,542 --> 01:14:17,167
You know, always being told
you're nothing badly affects your charisma.
995
01:14:17,876 --> 01:14:19,584
Sooner or later you really are nothing.
996
01:14:19,917 --> 01:14:23,751
When I saw Perle, I finally
understood I have to stop being nothing.
997
01:14:23,876 --> 01:14:27,959
She wants to get a tattoo.
And guess whose name is on it?
998
01:14:28,876 --> 01:14:30,042
Leo is a loser!
999
01:14:33,876 --> 01:14:36,834
I tried several things.
But the solution was there all along.
1000
01:14:38,542 --> 01:14:41,917
A few tests proved
that the virus worked perfectly,
1001
01:14:42,042 --> 01:14:45,202
without damaging the human brain any
more than a full intoxication would anyway.
1002
01:14:45,917 --> 01:14:48,376
The incubation time was about 12 hours.
1003
01:14:48,501 --> 01:14:50,959
So the spring ball
was the perfect place for my plan.
1004
01:14:51,167 --> 01:14:54,334
I mixed the drops into my pork
and called it "Blue Mett"!
1005
01:14:54,792 --> 01:14:56,584
One bite was enough to get infested.
1006
01:14:56,917 --> 01:15:00,709
By the way, I had nothing
to do with vodka getting into the punch.
1007
01:15:02,917 --> 01:15:04,959
And the nice part is,
the virus is curable.
1008
01:15:05,084 --> 01:15:08,417
And it has no effect on the stupid, SO
you see, these students aren't that dumb.
1009
01:15:09,001 --> 01:15:13,126
And that's why you don't
put a real mole in a "mole cake", OK?
1010
01:15:15,126 --> 01:15:18,959
It's been proven that all the infested are
now smarter and more motivated than before.
1011
01:15:19,251 --> 01:15:23,334
You know, sometime you have to
trim the tips to make hair grow faster.
1012
01:15:23,751 --> 01:15:25,626
And now it's #LeolsAHero.
1013
01:15:25,751 --> 01:15:27,459
That sounded so recited.
1014
01:15:27,584 --> 01:15:28,334
POTATO SALAD - SCREENPLAY
1015
01:15:28,459 --> 01:15:30,126
It was. But what the hell.
1016
01:15:30,709 --> 01:15:32,792
Leo, stay here!
1017
01:15:32,959 --> 01:15:34,501
I'm telling this all to the police!
1018
01:15:34,626 --> 01:15:38,251
You're not getting away
with this, you maggot, you'll see!
1019
01:15:38,459 --> 01:15:42,417
Et 3, et 4, et 5, et 6,
1020
01:15:42,709 --> 01:15:45,667
et sex, uh..., et 8,
1021
01:15:46,126 --> 01:15:47,459
I gotta answer that!
1022
01:15:47,584 --> 01:15:50,667
Non, non, non, cheri,
we finish exercise first, capisce?
1023
01:15:50,792 --> 01:15:52,272
- But it could be an emergency!
- Non!
1024
01:15:52,917 --> 01:15:57,959
Et8, et9, et 10, et11, et 12...
1025
01:15:59,501 --> 01:16:00,501
Due to an
1026
01:16:00,626 --> 01:16:01,626
emergency
1027
01:16:01,751 --> 01:16:02,751
the emercency
1028
01:16:02,876 --> 01:16:03,667
station is
1029
01:16:03,876 --> 01:16:04,876
temporarily
1030
01:16:05,126 --> 01:16:06,126
not available.
1031
01:16:06,334 --> 01:16:07,334
We thank you,
1032
01:16:07,501 --> 01:16:08,042
for your
1033
01:16:08,459 --> 01:16:09,459
appreciation.
1034
01:16:11,959 --> 01:16:13,042
God dammit!
1035
01:16:13,167 --> 01:16:14,167
Yes! Great!
1036
01:16:14,626 --> 01:16:18,376
I'll tell them in person now!
You're gonna see what happens!
1037
01:16:18,501 --> 01:16:22,084
Yeah, who are they
gonna believe, the new mayor or
1038
01:16:22,667 --> 01:16:23,917
the bad guy?
1039
01:16:24,751 --> 01:16:26,667
Leo, you're changing schools!
1040
01:16:35,626 --> 01:16:37,001
You framed me!
1041
01:16:37,126 --> 01:16:40,334
Yeah... After all the years
you put me down and bullied me...
1042
01:16:40,459 --> 01:16:45,001
You're nothing! You're a shame to my
school, you'll never amount to anything!
1043
01:16:45,334 --> 01:16:49,751
You're a shame to humanity,
a shame to the word "shame"!
1044
01:16:50,584 --> 01:16:51,751
I framed you, yeah.
1045
01:16:52,167 --> 01:16:53,542
- Professor Kraemer?
- Yes?
1046
01:16:53,667 --> 01:16:55,251
- You're under arrest.
- What?!
1047
01:16:55,376 --> 01:16:59,209
You have the right to remain silent. Whatever
you say can and will be used against you.
1048
01:16:59,459 --> 01:17:02,739
We will prove that you've been adorning
yourself for quite a while with borrowed
1049
01:17:03,126 --> 01:17:04,167
laurels.
1050
01:17:04,667 --> 01:17:10,126
That you've been running a black list to
drive your weak students here and then
1051
01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:13,209
eliminate them with a virus.
1052
01:17:13,292 --> 01:17:16,751
You got neither hide
or hair of real evidence!
1053
01:17:16,876 --> 01:17:17,501
We do.
1054
01:17:17,626 --> 01:17:18,334
The hair.
1055
01:17:18,459 --> 01:17:20,334
Game over, professor!
1056
01:17:20,459 --> 01:17:21,792
I'm calling my lawyer!
1057
01:17:21,917 --> 01:17:23,334
That's among your rights.
1058
01:17:23,834 --> 01:17:25,459
I'm gonna gut you all!
1059
01:17:25,584 --> 01:17:28,292
That is not among your rights. And now...
1060
01:17:29,251 --> 01:17:31,042
Zip it, Zippy. Take him away.
1061
01:17:33,917 --> 01:17:36,584
- Bye!
- Dude, what was all that?
1062
01:17:37,042 --> 01:17:39,251
It's all cool.
I'm gonna get back to sports,
1063
01:17:39,376 --> 01:17:41,810
then I'll get in my car
and rise away, the camera will crane up,
1064
01:17:41,834 --> 01:17:44,542
an emotional conclusion will be
narrated and music will kick in.
1065
01:17:46,209 --> 01:17:47,626
Here we go!
1066
01:17:51,751 --> 01:17:52,751
Call me.
1067
01:17:56,667 --> 01:17:59,251
Frauke, Frida, Frederike, Gabi, Gerda,
1068
01:17:59,376 --> 01:18:02,001
Gertrud, Gesa, Gisela, Gritt, Hannah,
1069
01:18:02,126 --> 01:18:05,376
Heidi, Heike, Helena, Helene, Helga...
1070
01:18:07,876 --> 01:18:10,376
So if you have the same problem I had,
1071
01:18:10,501 --> 01:18:15,084
deal with it like I did. Poison your peers
with some... No wait, I can't say that.
1072
01:18:15,542 --> 01:18:16,084
Nah...
1073
01:18:16,209 --> 01:18:18,251
But what I can say is, believe in yourself,
1074
01:18:18,584 --> 01:18:21,542
be yourself, and most of all,
don't let anybody label you.
1075
01:18:22,126 --> 01:18:24,542
And don't label
others either. Goes without saying.
1076
01:19:03,959 --> 01:19:06,626
"I know who it was. It was..."
1077
01:19:06,751 --> 01:19:09,667
OK, Mr. Salamanda, let's carry on.
You already stole enough of our time.
1078
01:19:10,084 --> 01:19:18,084
A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, ♪, K, L...
1079
01:19:18,459 --> 01:19:20,792
Write that down. Write the I down. Today!
1080
01:19:21,292 --> 01:19:24,209
I already cracked the case,
this is a pure waste of time here.
1081
01:19:24,292 --> 01:19:27,917
A, B, C, D, E...
1082
01:19:28,042 --> 01:19:30,667
OK, an E. Write it. Write it. Moving on.
1083
01:19:30,834 --> 01:19:38,251
A.B, C, D, E, F, G,
H, I, ♪, K, I, M, ♪♪, O, P, Q...
1084
01:19:38,959 --> 01:19:41,626
OK, a P. "Lep".
1085
01:19:41,751 --> 01:19:44,292
What kind of name
is that?! He's fucking with us!
1086
01:19:44,834 --> 01:19:48,084
I've had it!
Are you all fucking retarded here?!
1087
01:19:51,126 --> 01:19:52,584
Oh, by the way, um
1088
01:19:53,792 --> 01:19:55,376
Mrs. Martens, I've heard of her.
1089
01:19:55,542 --> 01:19:56,667
She's said to be badass.
1090
01:19:59,626 --> 01:20:01,106
Could you say that loud for everyone?
1091
01:20:01,667 --> 01:20:03,292
Oh fuck, dude, sorry!
1092
01:20:04,376 --> 01:20:06,056
Perle broke up
because Helmut traded her...
1093
01:20:06,542 --> 01:20:08,334
Yes, Perle broke up
because helmet...
1094
01:20:09,792 --> 01:20:12,292
OK, extras back to 1, still rolling.
1095
01:20:16,126 --> 01:20:17,459
Listen up! Hey!
1096
01:20:17,792 --> 01:20:19,251
Get back down, listen to me!
1097
01:20:19,501 --> 01:20:22,209
Nobody - insults - the woman...
1098
01:20:22,334 --> 01:20:23,667
What is that?!
1099
01:20:27,709 --> 01:20:29,251
OK, cut! Abort!
1100
01:20:29,667 --> 01:20:32,001
Good morning! No mourning!
1101
01:20:35,542 --> 01:20:37,792
- Cut. Dude, Torge!
- Fuck!
1102
01:20:38,917 --> 01:20:44,792
Perle broke up because Helmut traded
her engagement ring for a PS4 game!
1103
01:20:46,084 --> 01:20:49,667
What?! Locker room's
so 2014! Go to the retros, OK?
1104
01:20:49,792 --> 01:20:51,042
Embarrassing, ey.
1105
01:20:52,376 --> 01:20:53,417
Cut, thank you.
1106
01:20:54,542 --> 01:20:57,209
You must be Leo Knows,
the kid who drowned the kit... Oh, sorry!
1107
01:20:57,334 --> 01:20:59,626
Who drowned the kittens?!
1108
01:21:01,417 --> 01:21:02,959
Just now in the schoolyard, I saw it!
1109
01:21:06,334 --> 01:21:07,751
I think I need some booze.
1110
01:21:11,042 --> 01:21:12,876
Good, cut. Thank you.
1111
01:21:15,001 --> 01:21:16,209
Dude!
1112
01:22:00,959 --> 01:22:04,959
Sabine, Sandrine, Sara, Sarah with an H,
1113
01:22:05,084 --> 01:22:06,084
Sandra,
1114
01:22:06,792 --> 01:22:08,126
and... Sascha.
1115
01:22:09,376 --> 01:22:10,834
THE END
80414
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