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1
00:00:02,219 --> 00:00:05,219
[hip-hop playing loudly]
2
00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:17,372
Yo, sweetheart,
what is your name?
3
00:00:19,410 --> 00:00:22,020
What is your name?!
4
00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,975
[music continues playing loudly]
5
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,164
What's your name?
6
00:00:25,199 --> 00:00:27,419
Your name?
7
00:00:30,856 --> 00:00:33,116
[chuckles]
8
00:00:35,426 --> 00:00:37,246
[music continues playing loudly]
9
00:00:45,219 --> 00:00:46,519
[volume decreases,
Derwin laughs]
10
00:00:46,568 --> 00:00:48,828
You were saying?
11
00:00:48,874 --> 00:00:52,574
I was saying, what are you
doing for the next 24 hours?
12
00:00:53,618 --> 00:00:55,878
You tell me.
13
00:01:08,155 --> 00:01:11,325
Oh.Oh, right here.
14
00:01:11,375 --> 00:01:13,195
Whoo!
15
00:01:13,247 --> 00:01:15,287
Damn.
Nice.
16
00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:17,986
Girl, I been
with you all day. Yeah.
17
00:01:18,034 --> 00:01:21,264
We went to lunch,
I took you shopping,
18
00:01:21,298 --> 00:01:23,428
VIP at the club.
19
00:01:23,474 --> 00:01:24,874
Raq, you got this one.
20
00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:27,910
Nah, but I got you.
21
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:37,050
So, uh, what can
I get you guys?
22
00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:47,892
What's good?
23
00:02:01,251 --> 00:02:04,081
[high-pitched whirring]
24
00:02:09,607 --> 00:02:13,047
Melanie, what
are you doing?
25
00:02:13,089 --> 00:02:15,049
I'm shredding pictures
of Derwin.
26
00:02:15,091 --> 00:02:17,181
That is not Derwin.
27
00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:19,404
This is my brother.
28
00:02:19,443 --> 00:02:22,013
Yeah, well, too bad, okay?
29
00:02:22,054 --> 00:02:23,104
He looks like Derwin.
30
00:02:24,492 --> 00:02:28,412
Derwin came into the diner
tonight... with a girl.
31
00:02:28,452 --> 00:02:29,892
Do I look like I care?
32
00:02:29,932 --> 00:02:31,802
It is 3:00 in the morning.
33
00:02:31,847 --> 00:02:35,457
But you should have seen him
cheesing and grinning
34
00:02:35,503 --> 00:02:37,683
with his stupid ass.
35
00:02:37,722 --> 00:02:38,812
And they were
making out.
36
00:02:38,854 --> 00:02:39,814
[scoffs]
37
00:02:39,855 --> 00:02:42,415
Right there in public.
38
00:02:42,466 --> 00:02:45,946
Skanky hoochie ho and
stupid-ass Derwin.
39
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,951
What rock did he
find her under?
40
00:02:47,993 --> 00:02:50,743
If you care so much,
why don't you just ask him?
41
00:02:50,779 --> 00:02:53,039
And look pathetic?
42
00:02:53,085 --> 00:02:53,825
Now, go get your keys.
43
00:02:53,869 --> 00:02:55,349
We got to do a drive-by.
44
00:02:55,392 --> 00:02:57,002
Yeah.
45
00:02:57,046 --> 00:02:59,136
I knew I should have done
a background check on you.
46
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:01,919
Good night.
47
00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:06,615
Skanky hoochie ho.
48
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:09,154
Yo, man, it was so sad.
49
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,229
Yo, there I am
with my girl, right?
50
00:03:11,278 --> 00:03:12,888
And Melanie walks up
51
00:03:12,931 --> 00:03:14,981
with this greasy apron
and these busted-ass shoes
52
00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:17,280
asking us if we wanted
something to drink.
53
00:03:17,327 --> 00:03:18,937
And I know she was shook
54
00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:20,771
'cause she didn't even
tell us the specials.
55
00:03:20,809 --> 00:03:21,809
Okay, hold up.
56
00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:23,203
Your girl?
Mm-hmm.
57
00:03:23,246 --> 00:03:24,896
Okay, let me get
this straight.
58
00:03:24,943 --> 00:03:26,823
You meet a broad
in traffic,
59
00:03:26,858 --> 00:03:29,858
rub up against her,
maybe share some eggs,
60
00:03:29,905 --> 00:03:32,385
and all of a sudden
this chick is your girl?
61
00:03:32,429 --> 00:03:33,819
Have you not read
the Playa Handbook?
62
00:03:33,865 --> 00:03:36,735
Where do I pick that up,
Malik, huh-- Amazon.com?
63
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:39,781
No, I think you get it
at Unwritten.com, you 'tard.
64
00:03:39,828 --> 00:03:41,788
What now?
65
00:03:41,830 --> 00:03:43,310
We're trying to help you
live the life
66
00:03:43,353 --> 00:03:45,273
of a single
professional athlete.
67
00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:47,442
Which by your blank stare,
68
00:03:47,488 --> 00:03:50,398
I can tell you don't fully
realize that you are.
69
00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:51,967
No, I am living
the life, all right?
70
00:03:52,014 --> 00:03:54,934
My place is fly,
got a new whip, a new girl.
71
00:03:54,973 --> 00:03:57,453
Listen, man, all I'm saying
is seeing Melanie last night
72
00:03:57,498 --> 00:03:58,928
with them gravy stains...
73
00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:00,937
Okay, forget about her and
her gravy stains, all right?
74
00:04:00,979 --> 00:04:02,199
That chapter's over.
75
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,072
We're trying to school
you right now, boy.
76
00:04:04,113 --> 00:04:05,163
'Cause they obviously
didn't teach you this stuff
77
00:04:05,201 --> 00:04:07,071
in... Mayberry.
78
00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:09,896
Look, guys, I understand
what you're trying to say,
79
00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:10,895
but Raquel...
Oh!
80
00:04:10,946 --> 00:04:12,726
Ah-ah!
What now?
81
00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:16,344
Rule number one--
no names, okay?
82
00:04:16,386 --> 00:04:17,816
And if you've got to
call her something,
83
00:04:17,866 --> 00:04:18,996
give 'em
nicknames, like
84
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:22,221
Hottie, Buckwild,
Delicious,
85
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:24,922
Not So Delicious.
86
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:25,870
And to avoid the need
for names,
87
00:04:25,917 --> 00:04:27,177
we have rule number two--
88
00:04:27,223 --> 00:04:28,753
you never spend more
than four consecutive hours
89
00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:30,710
with the same chick.
Right.
90
00:04:30,748 --> 00:04:32,098
Which leads us
to rule number three...
91
00:04:32,141 --> 00:04:33,141
No sleepovers.
Thank you.
92
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:34,185
Hit it and quit it.
93
00:04:34,230 --> 00:04:35,540
In and out.
Bob and weave.
94
00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:37,409
Stick and move.
Thank you for the ass, honey.
95
00:04:37,451 --> 00:04:38,541
Deuces.
Deuces.
96
00:04:38,582 --> 00:04:40,982
[phone ringing]Hold up.
97
00:04:41,019 --> 00:04:42,629
Yo, it's Raq...
Ah!
98
00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:44,853
M-My girl...
Boy!
99
00:04:44,893 --> 00:04:47,073
All right,
I'll call her Eggs, man.
100
00:04:47,112 --> 00:04:49,592
I'll call her Eggs.
101
00:04:49,637 --> 00:04:53,077
What it do, Eggs?
102
00:04:53,118 --> 00:04:54,688
Uh-huh.
103
00:04:58,776 --> 00:05:00,126
Hey, Kelly.
104
00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:02,209
Sweetie, what are
you doing here?
105
00:05:02,258 --> 00:05:03,868
I'm about to start
my Sunbeam meeting.
106
00:05:03,912 --> 00:05:04,912
Um, I'm sorry,
Kelly, but look,
107
00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:06,476
I really need
to talk to you.
108
00:05:06,523 --> 00:05:08,663
Okay, um, I ran into Derwin
109
00:05:08,699 --> 00:05:10,349
and he was with this girl.
110
00:05:10,397 --> 00:05:11,567
Aw...
111
00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:12,565
Was she pretty?
112
00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:15,396
No.
113
00:05:15,445 --> 00:05:16,875
Yes.
[sighs]
114
00:05:18,230 --> 00:05:20,490
You haven't heard anything
about her, have you?
115
00:05:20,537 --> 00:05:21,967
No, sorry.
116
00:05:22,017 --> 00:05:23,497
But, you know, if you
want to hang around,
117
00:05:23,540 --> 00:05:24,890
maybe you'll hear something
from the Sunbeams.
118
00:05:24,933 --> 00:05:26,983
Okay, thanks, Kelly.
119
00:05:27,022 --> 00:05:28,942
Oh. No, no, no, no, no.
120
00:05:28,980 --> 00:05:30,370
Not out in the open, mm-mm.
121
00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:31,507
You're a civilian now.
122
00:05:31,548 --> 00:05:32,638
You got to hide.
123
00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,860
Um, just go busy
yourself in the kitchen.
124
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:38,860
Oh, in fact, why don't
you handle my, my oven?
125
00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:40,913
It's not self-cleaning.
126
00:05:42,124 --> 00:05:43,604
Hi, Kelly.
127
00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:44,607
Hey, ladies.
128
00:05:44,648 --> 00:05:46,218
Oh, my God, Mathis, look at you.
129
00:05:46,258 --> 00:05:47,478
You're huge.
130
00:05:47,521 --> 00:05:51,131
Okay, not the thing to say.
131
00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:54,476
Med School, what the hell
you doing here?
132
00:05:54,528 --> 00:05:56,358
Shh, shh. Just pretend
I'm not here.
133
00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:57,789
[whispering]:
Okay, will do.
134
00:05:57,835 --> 00:05:59,875
Red alert. Red alert.
135
00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,544
We got an intruder in our midst.
136
00:06:01,578 --> 00:06:02,878
Oh, come on, Tasha.
137
00:06:02,927 --> 00:06:04,317
Has it really come to this?
138
00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:05,674
Look, you started this dance
139
00:06:05,713 --> 00:06:07,853
when you cabbage-patched
your way into Malik's bed.
140
00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:10,109
So go on, moonwalk yourself
on out of here.
141
00:06:10,935 --> 00:06:13,155
Go on. Now get.
142
00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:14,978
[snapping fingers rhythmically]
143
00:06:15,026 --> 00:06:15,846
Kelly?
144
00:06:15,897 --> 00:06:17,377
Sorry.
145
00:06:17,420 --> 00:06:18,380
Kelly.
146
00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:20,861
Now get.
147
00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:30,782
Thanks for having my
back, Sergeant at Arms.
148
00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:33,775
God, these people think
they can just barge in here anytime they want.
149
00:06:33,828 --> 00:06:35,528
I'm thinking about
getting a gun.
150
00:06:35,569 --> 00:06:39,009
When you're serious,
I know a guy.
151
00:06:40,356 --> 00:06:41,876
Excuse me.
152
00:06:41,923 --> 00:06:44,233
Um, that girl-- the one
you called Med School?
153
00:06:44,273 --> 00:06:45,843
Why do you call
her Med School?
154
00:06:45,883 --> 00:06:48,713
Uh, 'cause she's
in med school, Ditzy.
155
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:50,926
Excuse me?
156
00:06:50,975 --> 00:06:53,715
Oh, girl, please, look,
I give everybody nicknames.
157
00:06:53,761 --> 00:06:56,021
Med School,
Ditzy, Drunky.
158
00:06:58,069 --> 00:06:59,899
Okay, okay, I get it.
159
00:06:59,941 --> 00:07:01,251
Bitchy.
160
00:07:02,334 --> 00:07:04,604
I got your "Bitchy"
in my trunk.
161
00:07:07,949 --> 00:07:10,129
[sighs]
162
00:07:16,958 --> 00:07:18,998
Derwin.
163
00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:21,347
What are you doing here?
164
00:07:22,354 --> 00:07:24,974
Uh, I live here.
165
00:07:25,009 --> 00:07:26,919
The question is:
what are you doing here?
166
00:07:26,968 --> 00:07:28,838
'Cause I vaguely remember
you moving out.
167
00:07:28,883 --> 00:07:32,233
Yeah, well, um,
I just wanted to, um...
168
00:07:34,845 --> 00:07:38,275
I forgot my thing.
169
00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:41,457
Your thing?
Yes, my thing.
170
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:45,904
I moved out in such a rush,
I forgot it.
171
00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:48,993
Okay.
172
00:07:49,033 --> 00:07:52,653
You're more than welcome
to come in and look for it.
173
00:07:56,388 --> 00:07:59,518
[scoffs]
Thank you.
174
00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:01,046
You're welcome.
175
00:08:07,922 --> 00:08:11,322
What happened
to the little black boy?
176
00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:15,543
Okay, in case
you haven't noticed,
177
00:08:15,582 --> 00:08:18,322
he's a grown-ass man now,
Melanie.
178
00:08:20,021 --> 00:08:23,111
No, the photograph
of the little black boy
179
00:08:23,154 --> 00:08:24,904
I gave you
after you got drafted.
180
00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:26,809
Oh, yeah.
181
00:08:26,854 --> 00:08:28,124
My decorator--
182
00:08:28,159 --> 00:08:30,119
he said it didn't go
with my new drapes.
183
00:08:30,161 --> 00:08:33,601
And these new joints right here
are Italian.
184
00:08:35,123 --> 00:08:37,303
What?
185
00:08:39,169 --> 00:08:40,959
Black and white photography
lends itself
186
00:08:40,998 --> 00:08:42,428
more to an Art Deco.
187
00:08:42,477 --> 00:08:44,037
[laughing]
188
00:08:44,087 --> 00:08:46,177
Wow.
189
00:08:46,221 --> 00:08:48,011
Nice, mm-hmm.
Okay.
190
00:08:48,049 --> 00:08:51,139
So now you're that guy?
191
00:08:51,182 --> 00:08:52,232
Okay, what's that
supposed to mean?
192
00:08:52,270 --> 00:08:55,800
Well, um, cheesy apartment,
193
00:08:55,839 --> 00:08:58,669
even cheesier girl.
194
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,283
Oh.
195
00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:06,464
Okay, so that's what
this is about, huh, my girl?
196
00:09:06,502 --> 00:09:07,632
Oh.
197
00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:09,067
Oh, so she isyour girl?
198
00:09:09,113 --> 00:09:11,943
What you care about Eggs?
199
00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:15,512
What?
200
00:09:17,121 --> 00:09:19,171
Look, the only thing I care
about is my photo, okay, Derwin?
201
00:09:19,210 --> 00:09:20,560
It was a gift.
202
00:09:20,603 --> 00:09:22,693
And you got rid of it
so you can make room
203
00:09:22,736 --> 00:09:24,606
for some stupid butt
picture yourself
204
00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:26,391
and some gaudy-ass
Italian drapes?
205
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:31,273
That picture is not stupid.
206
00:09:31,309 --> 00:09:33,439
You're stupid.
207
00:09:33,485 --> 00:09:34,965
No, you are.
208
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:36,399
Since when do you
209
00:09:36,445 --> 00:09:38,615
spend your money
on this kind of crap?
210
00:09:38,665 --> 00:09:41,095
Since I stopped having
to pay for medical school.
211
00:09:41,145 --> 00:09:42,795
Ah.
212
00:09:42,843 --> 00:09:45,893
Turns out I have a lot more
cheddar for cheesing.
213
00:09:45,933 --> 00:09:48,073
Jealous?
214
00:09:48,109 --> 00:09:49,719
Jealous?
215
00:09:49,763 --> 00:09:51,633
Ha!
216
00:09:51,678 --> 00:09:53,978
I'm ecstatic.
217
00:09:54,028 --> 00:09:56,768
Looks like I just dodged
a big old cheesy bullet.
218
00:09:56,813 --> 00:09:59,603
Oh, yeah, "ha" to you.
219
00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:03,212
Looks like I dodged
a big old slutty bullet,
220
00:10:03,254 --> 00:10:05,654
Little Miss "I Slept
With Trey Wiggs."
221
00:10:05,692 --> 00:10:08,832
Oh, okay, so now I'm a slut?
222
00:10:08,869 --> 00:10:12,389
Well, you know, I'd rather be
a slut than a... cornball.
223
00:10:13,438 --> 00:10:15,008
You corny mother...
224
00:10:15,049 --> 00:10:16,829
Oh, whatever, Slutnik!
225
00:10:16,877 --> 00:10:18,437
Yeah, well, whatever,
Malik wannabe.
226
00:10:18,487 --> 00:10:20,097
What'd you say?
227
00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:22,671
Oh, Malik's got a Porsche,
so you get a Porsche.
228
00:10:22,709 --> 00:10:23,669
So?
229
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:24,710
Malik's got a big TV,
230
00:10:24,754 --> 00:10:26,324
so you got to get a big TV.
231
00:10:26,364 --> 00:10:29,064
Malik's got a safari look;
you had to go Lion King.
232
00:10:31,065 --> 00:10:33,755
You ain't nothing but
a poor man's version of Malik.
233
00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:35,417
No, no, no, wait, wait.
234
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:38,030
You're Malik's bitch.
235
00:10:40,030 --> 00:10:42,210
You know what, Melanie,
get up out of my house!
236
00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:43,950
Bounce!
237
00:10:46,471 --> 00:10:49,651
Are you sure you don't want
to check with Malik first?
238
00:10:55,089 --> 00:10:56,569
Hey, babe.
239
00:10:56,612 --> 00:10:58,142
Hey.
240
00:10:58,179 --> 00:10:59,959
[clears throat]
241
00:11:00,007 --> 00:11:01,357
Can I get a little help here?
242
00:11:05,403 --> 00:11:06,973
Wait a minute.
243
00:11:07,971 --> 00:11:09,411
Wait a minute.
244
00:11:09,451 --> 00:11:10,971
These aren't
grocery bags.
245
00:11:14,021 --> 00:11:16,111
You...!
246
00:11:17,807 --> 00:11:21,027
There are clothes in here
with name brands on them.
247
00:11:21,071 --> 00:11:22,251
They'd better
be irregular.
248
00:11:22,290 --> 00:11:25,030
Hmm, they're irregular,
all right.
249
00:11:25,075 --> 00:11:26,765
Irregularly expensive.
250
00:11:26,816 --> 00:11:28,556
Oh, what's wrong?
251
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,210
Afraid it's going to cut
into your steroid budget?
252
00:11:30,254 --> 00:11:31,474
Oh, come on.
253
00:11:31,516 --> 00:11:32,906
Kel, I'm just saying,
you might want to go
254
00:11:32,953 --> 00:11:34,743
easy on the spending until
I get my new contract.
255
00:11:34,781 --> 00:11:37,481
Next time just... tell
me before you go crazy.
256
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,962
Oh, like you told me before
you started shooting up?
257
00:11:40,003 --> 00:11:41,703
Would you stop
with that, please?
258
00:11:41,744 --> 00:11:43,144
Uh-oh.
259
00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:45,750
Is this that 'roid rage
I've been hearing about?
260
00:11:45,792 --> 00:11:47,142
Ooh.
261
00:11:47,184 --> 00:11:49,534
Look at that vein just
popping out on your neck.
262
00:11:49,578 --> 00:11:50,968
Ew, is that a pimple?
263
00:11:51,014 --> 00:11:53,024
Damn, these side
effects are a bitch.
264
00:11:53,060 --> 00:11:55,110
I get it.
You're mad at me.
265
00:11:55,149 --> 00:11:57,239
Okay, you got to stop with the
passive-aggressive behavior.
266
00:11:57,281 --> 00:11:58,281
No, I don't.
Yes, you do.
267
00:11:58,326 --> 00:11:59,846
No, I don't.
268
00:11:59,893 --> 00:12:01,853
Okay, well, could
you stop, please?
269
00:12:01,895 --> 00:12:03,975
'Cause it's starting
to hurt my feelings.
270
00:12:04,027 --> 00:12:06,377
All right, fine.
271
00:12:06,421 --> 00:12:08,821
Can you at least help me
carry my bags upstairs?
272
00:12:10,251 --> 00:12:12,641
Seeing that you're all
pumped up on steroids.
273
00:12:12,688 --> 00:12:13,818
You know what?
274
00:12:27,224 --> 00:12:30,234
It's a beautiful day
at Tavern on the Grease.
275
00:12:30,271 --> 00:12:31,231
I'll be your server.
276
00:12:31,272 --> 00:12:33,012
Ask about our specials.
277
00:12:33,056 --> 00:12:35,056
[chuckling]:
That's funny-- she thinks we'd eat here.
278
00:12:36,451 --> 00:12:38,021
You're Med School,
aren't you?
279
00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:40,801
I'm sorry, do I know you?
280
00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:43,147
No, but, uh,
that's good.
281
00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:46,367
That way, we protect
the innocent.
282
00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:49,027
Look, seeing as you're in
medical school and all,
283
00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:51,212
we think that you can
help us with something.
284
00:12:51,248 --> 00:12:54,158
Oh, God, you're not in labor,
are you?
285
00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:56,948
I heard a rumor
about a woman who had
286
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:59,213
a baby by a
basketball player.
287
00:12:59,256 --> 00:13:02,126
Can't say who,
but let's just say
288
00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:05,442
his name rhymes with
Shabron Aames.
289
00:13:07,308 --> 00:13:09,048
You know how she did it?
290
00:13:10,093 --> 00:13:12,793
Inquiring minds want to know.
291
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:15,055
With a turkey baster.
292
00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:16,008
What?
293
00:13:16,056 --> 00:13:17,446
A turkey baster.
294
00:13:17,492 --> 00:13:20,062
It's not just
for basting turkeys.
295
00:13:20,103 --> 00:13:23,153
Well... there goes Thanksgiving.
296
00:13:23,193 --> 00:13:25,543
We're willing to pay you
297
00:13:25,587 --> 00:13:28,417
to help my girl get
pregnant the same way.
298
00:13:28,459 --> 00:13:31,419
I, uh, nabbed my man
the old-fashioned way.
299
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:33,422
Told him I was
on the pill.
300
00:13:33,464 --> 00:13:35,554
But my friend could
use a little help.
301
00:13:35,597 --> 00:13:37,597
How does $4,000 sound?
302
00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:41,172
Look, um, I can't imagine that
that would work.
303
00:13:41,211 --> 00:13:44,001
I mean, I guess
you'd have to freeze--
304
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,910
How much?
305
00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:49,605
Oh, she wants
to negotiate.
306
00:13:49,654 --> 00:13:51,924
Derwin Davis
is worth it.
307
00:13:51,961 --> 00:13:55,141
Are you sure you're not
talking about someone
308
00:13:55,182 --> 00:13:57,312
who rhymes with Derwin Davis?
309
00:13:57,358 --> 00:13:58,528
No.
310
00:13:59,795 --> 00:14:00,875
$4,250.
311
00:14:00,927 --> 00:14:02,147
You in?
312
00:14:05,018 --> 00:14:06,188
Hey, Ma,
313
00:14:06,236 --> 00:14:09,016
you like your sauce
mild or spicy?
314
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,935
Do you have to ask?
315
00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:14,770
[knocking at door]
316
00:14:14,810 --> 00:14:15,900
I'll get it.
317
00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:17,472
Can you keep
stirring that for me? Sure.
318
00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:19,158
No, no, no, no, no.
319
00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:20,556
I need you to do it sexy.
320
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,211
You've definitely
done this before.
321
00:14:30,173 --> 00:14:31,573
Hey.
Melanie?
322
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:33,049
Girl, what you doing here?
323
00:14:33,089 --> 00:14:34,999
I'm kind of in the
middle of something.
324
00:14:36,266 --> 00:14:38,086
What, did you forget to leave
this bitch a tip?
325
00:14:42,577 --> 00:14:44,187
You know what?
I need to talk to you.
326
00:14:44,231 --> 00:14:45,581
In private.
327
00:14:48,061 --> 00:14:50,671
Well, there's nothing
you can say to me
328
00:14:50,715 --> 00:14:53,755
that you can't say in
front of... my girl.
329
00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:55,895
Hmm.
330
00:14:55,938 --> 00:14:57,418
I have herpes.
331
00:14:57,461 --> 00:14:59,901
[clears throat]
332
00:15:03,685 --> 00:15:05,685
I'll be right back, Eggs.
333
00:15:06,731 --> 00:15:07,781
Bitch.
334
00:15:14,391 --> 00:15:15,921
Herpes, Melanie?
335
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:17,348
Really?
336
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:19,314
You really need to stop
this silliness and move on.
337
00:15:19,353 --> 00:15:21,223
'Cause it's obvious that I have.
338
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:22,658
You know what?
Forget it.
339
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:25,014
I came here to warn you,
340
00:15:25,054 --> 00:15:27,714
but you deserve whatever
"your girl" gives you.
341
00:15:27,752 --> 00:15:29,232
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
342
00:15:29,276 --> 00:15:32,316
So what you saying--
shehas herpes?
343
00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:35,196
No, Jethro.
344
00:15:35,238 --> 00:15:37,408
She's trying to trap you
with a turkey baster.
345
00:15:37,458 --> 00:15:40,678
A tu... a-a turkey baster?
346
00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:41,902
Yeah.
347
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,031
It ain't just
for basting turkeys.
348
00:15:44,073 --> 00:15:46,863
All right, Melanie, now you're
just making stuff up.
349
00:15:46,902 --> 00:15:49,862
Why the hell would
I start lying to you now?
350
00:15:51,515 --> 00:15:53,165
'Cause you want me back.
351
00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:57,479
Please, negro.
352
00:15:57,521 --> 00:15:59,001
Are you serious?
353
00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:00,565
I don't want
your cheating ass.
354
00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:01,701
You know what?
355
00:16:01,743 --> 00:16:03,703
Go back in there
with your turkey baster.
356
00:16:03,745 --> 00:16:06,005
I hope she takes you
for everything you're worth.
357
00:16:08,837 --> 00:16:10,877
Which ain't much.
358
00:16:10,926 --> 00:16:13,226
And you know, whatever
you're doing with your chest--
359
00:16:13,276 --> 00:16:14,316
very gay.
360
00:16:21,806 --> 00:16:25,326
[sultry R & B playing]
361
00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:29,732
Damn.
362
00:16:29,771 --> 00:16:31,901
Yo, you killing me, Eggs.
363
00:16:31,947 --> 00:16:33,947
Don't die on me now, baby.
364
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,783
Hold up, hold up.
365
00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:38,345
Bathroom break.
366
00:17:06,589 --> 00:17:08,679
Yeah, I just flushed it.
367
00:17:08,723 --> 00:17:10,463
What are you talking about?
368
00:17:10,507 --> 00:17:12,067
Oh, baby, come on, Eggs.
369
00:17:12,117 --> 00:17:14,077
Don't try and play stupid.
370
00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:16,299
Derwin, I was just...Shh.
371
00:17:16,339 --> 00:17:18,949
Don't say anything.
372
00:17:18,993 --> 00:17:23,093
'Cause I want to remember you
just as you were...
373
00:17:23,128 --> 00:17:25,128
sunny-side up.
374
00:17:25,174 --> 00:17:27,964
[music continues in background]
375
00:17:30,397 --> 00:17:32,007
What, you're not going
to let me get dressed?
376
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,271
Girl, you can do
whatever you want.
377
00:17:33,313 --> 00:17:34,973
You just can't do it here.
378
00:17:42,278 --> 00:17:43,848
So, what, that's it?
379
00:17:43,888 --> 00:17:45,798
Uh... yeah.
380
00:17:45,847 --> 00:17:48,627
Oh, thanks
for the ass.
381
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:50,156
Deuces.
382
00:18:01,602 --> 00:18:06,132
$38 for a whole
week's worth?
383
00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:08,002
How do you live
on this?
384
00:18:08,043 --> 00:18:09,833
You got two
choices, honey.
385
00:18:09,871 --> 00:18:12,611
Steal food or
sleep with Jorge.
386
00:18:12,656 --> 00:18:15,656
Between you and
me, Jorge's safer.
387
00:18:15,703 --> 00:18:18,143
Oh, and push the pie.
388
00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:21,234
It's starting
to mold.
389
00:18:37,725 --> 00:18:40,155
You know, if you're going
to take up a seat,
390
00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:41,556
you're going to have
to order something.
391
00:18:41,598 --> 00:18:43,818
Okay...
392
00:18:43,861 --> 00:18:45,251
What's good?
393
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:47,168
The pie.
394
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:49,613
How about a big, fat slice?
395
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:52,700
[chuckles]
396
00:18:52,740 --> 00:18:54,130
You know what, Mel?
397
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:56,786
Just, uh... I'll just
take some coffee.
398
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:59,091
Okay.
399
00:19:09,887 --> 00:19:11,887
What's this?
400
00:19:12,934 --> 00:19:15,504
It's a peace offering.
401
00:19:15,545 --> 00:19:17,195
Your little black boy.
402
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:18,553
I found it in storage.
403
00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:22,342
So I was right
about your girl?
404
00:19:22,378 --> 00:19:25,118
Look, Mel, I never said she
was my girl... Yes, you did.
405
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,434
You said that she...
Mel...
406
00:19:27,470 --> 00:19:29,600
Melanie, listen.
407
00:19:29,646 --> 00:19:31,646
I don't want to fight
with you anymore.
408
00:19:31,692 --> 00:19:33,432
Okay?
409
00:19:33,476 --> 00:19:35,826
I came down here
to say thank you
410
00:19:35,870 --> 00:19:38,660
for having my back.
411
00:19:38,699 --> 00:19:40,919
Appreciate that.
412
00:19:40,962 --> 00:19:43,092
I don't have change
for a hundred.
413
00:19:43,138 --> 00:19:45,878
It's a tip.
414
00:19:45,923 --> 00:19:47,803
You know, Derwin,
I can take care of myself.
415
00:19:47,838 --> 00:19:48,968
I know.
416
00:19:49,013 --> 00:19:50,103
I can.
417
00:19:50,145 --> 00:19:51,535
I heard you.
418
00:19:51,581 --> 00:19:53,581
Good.Good.
419
00:19:53,627 --> 00:19:55,147
I'm not taking this.
420
00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:56,804
Well, I'm not taking it back.
421
00:19:56,847 --> 00:19:58,277
Well, fine.
422
00:19:58,327 --> 00:19:59,287
Fine.
423
00:19:59,328 --> 00:20:01,938
Good.Good.
424
00:20:05,378 --> 00:20:08,248
Take it easy, Mel.
425
00:20:14,561 --> 00:20:17,261
Back off, Eunice.
426
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:20,483
I guess I'm gonna have me
a hot date with Jorge, huh?
427
00:20:22,569 --> 00:20:25,139
Yeah, well, at least
you got one.
428
00:20:25,189 --> 00:20:29,739
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