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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:11,080 It's been a month since Mum moved in, and it's not going great. 2 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:14,120 MUSIC: Sick of It by the Primitives 3 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,440 Oh! You have to do that to your face every morning? 4 00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:20,200 Do you have to start the day with a rollie behind your ear? 5 00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:22,400 And I need a bigger cup than that. 6 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:26,480 There's no fire in your sun... 7 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,640 They can't even get through breakfast together. 8 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,160 How many sugars have you put in that? Three. 9 00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:33,560 Well, I take five. 10 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:36,440 Tastes like dishwater. Not good for you, that. 11 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:38,680 Oh, what, are you the expert on health now? 12 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,920 I'm very healthy, I'll have you know. 13 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:42,840 My body's a pissing temple. 14 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:45,680 I'm sick of it all 15 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:51,120 I'm sick of it 16 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:54,960 Sick of it all. 17 00:00:56,240 --> 00:01:01,240 It was the strangest experience of my life and, then again, 18 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:02,600 weirdly erotic. 19 00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:05,360 Oh, God, not the alien abduction again! 20 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,640 If aliens were coming to Earth, why would they come to Bolton 21 00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:10,920 and abduct you, Grandma? 22 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:12,960 You tell me, Alma. You tell me. 23 00:01:12,960 --> 00:01:14,920 Hm, yeah, that's really interesting. 24 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:16,600 So, on Lin's progress... 25 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:19,360 They were stood in the corner of me bedroom, 26 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:22,280 in the middle of the night, just staring at me at first. 27 00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:24,160 What did they look like? 28 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:26,920 Erm, normalish-size heads. 29 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,520 Malevolent eyes. 30 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:33,000 And then they told me they needed to take me. Bloody hell! 31 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,240 Yeah, and I don't blame them. 32 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:38,880 You know, I am an extremely sexual being. 33 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:41,320 As were they. OK, shall we get off 34 00:01:41,320 --> 00:01:43,960 the topic of whether you did or didn't fuck an alien, Grandma? 35 00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:45,640 Yes, I'd like that too, actually. 36 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:48,920 Erm, I think it's important to say 37 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:53,520 I'm glad you all feel comfortable now, being so...honest with me, 38 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:57,240 but these weekly visits are actually about tracking Lin's progress. 39 00:01:57,240 --> 00:01:59,520 Yeah, well, I've got my own news, actually. 40 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,920 Right, well, it's not really a news-sharing forum. 41 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,560 Oh, what is it? Well... Sorry, I've got another visit after this 42 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:07,120 and then Pilates at five. Yeah. No, I understand that. Yeah. 43 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:10,160 So, I got in the theatre company and I'm off on tour. 44 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:14,120 Oh! Oh, that's fantastic, Alma! I know. 45 00:02:14,120 --> 00:02:15,800 I knew you'd be a star. 46 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,440 Didn't I always say that, Lin? 47 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:20,400 No, never. How long are you going for? 48 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,120 Six months. 49 00:02:22,120 --> 00:02:24,840 Right, fucking great. 50 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:26,000 LORRAINE SIGHS 51 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,360 What about me? 52 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:28,960 Oh, for God's sake! 53 00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:30,680 Well, you're doing really well now, Mum. 54 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:33,800 Am I now? I feel like a battery farm chicken here, 55 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:38,040 cooped up between these two clucking away with no break. 56 00:02:38,040 --> 00:02:39,320 Yes, it can be draining. 57 00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:42,160 Do you know the most exciting thing that's happened to me 58 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:44,480 this week is having a buttered crumpet? 59 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:48,440 It's not been easy for Mum, staying clean and getting back on the grid. 60 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:51,240 Take yesterday, for example. ALARM BEEPS 61 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:52,560 An abrupt 7:30 start. 62 00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,080 Cock-a-doodle-fuckin'-do. Time to go. 63 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,080 She had to get about a million buses, 64 00:02:57,080 --> 00:03:00,800 which stressed her right out... SHE GRUNTS 65 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,480 ..to get her injection. 66 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:04,200 Hurry up! Then back home 67 00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:06,160 for the daily character assassination. 68 00:03:06,160 --> 00:03:08,640 You slump like Granny Rose. 69 00:03:08,640 --> 00:03:10,720 She ended up with a hunchback. 70 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:13,640 Do you remember that big hump you used to hang your hats on? 71 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:15,560 And what's she got to relieve her? 72 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:16,720 Not any more. 73 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:18,680 No wonder she keeps having tantrums. 74 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:23,240 I suppose she'll just have to have another fucking crumpet. 75 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:25,320 Well, a crumpet sounds lovely to me. 76 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:27,360 I've not had a carb in six years. 77 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:31,360 No wonder she's always pissed off. 78 00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:33,560 Look, Lin, I know it's hard, 79 00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:37,560 but we can't be feeling sorry for ourselves, can we? OK? 80 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:39,400 The longer you keep a clean slate, 81 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:42,360 the more leverage we'll have to get you rehoused in the future. 82 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:44,920 Right, I best be off. 83 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,920 I'll be back next week. And, erm, 84 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,880 as interesting as it is to hear about everybody's colourful lives, 85 00:03:51,880 --> 00:03:56,240 I'd like to keep the focus on Lin, please, OK? 86 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:58,760 All right. Yeah. I'll see myself out. 87 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:02,480 Bye! Thank you. Thank you very much. Bye. Bye. 88 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:05,080 DOOR CLOSES 89 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,680 She needs to eat a fucking potato, her. 90 00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:11,200 SHE CHUCKLES Yeah. 91 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:17,520 I can't wait. 92 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:20,560 A national tour, Leanne. Woo! 93 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:25,040 Look out, Hull, Scunthorpe, Margate - here I come. 94 00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:27,960 Who the bloody hell do you think you are, Coyote Ugly? 95 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:32,400 Get down off me furniture! Eh, I bought a few bits. 96 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:34,760 Ooh, get your bits out. 97 00:04:34,760 --> 00:04:38,080 These are my "I'm a star" sunglasses. You know, 98 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,360 for when I'm dealing with the paparazzi. 99 00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:43,320 I think you need to manage your expectations, babe. 100 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:46,400 I've got some news of my own, actually. Oh, yeah? 101 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:50,880 Chris has asked me to move in with him. No way. 102 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:54,080 How are you going to shake that off? Well, I think I'm going to do it. 103 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:56,960 You're going to move in with him? You've only just met him. 104 00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,720 Well, I think it's serious. How could you do this to me, Leanne? 105 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,440 Well, I'm not doing this to you, am I? 106 00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:05,920 We're just ready to take the next step. Oh, my God! 107 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:09,720 You'll be picking furniture, talking about kitchens. 108 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:11,440 You'll be having a baby next! 109 00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,040 Oh, my God. You'll be inviting me to the baby shower! 110 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,760 Here we go. There'll be no gin. 111 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:18,440 I'll have to bring my own booze 112 00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:21,480 and talk to your new mum mates about the primal power of 113 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:26,360 water births and how they think their child is a genius. Oh, God. 114 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,200 I feel sick, I need to lie down. 115 00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:30,080 Oh! 116 00:05:31,760 --> 00:05:33,920 Goodbye, my wild friend, 117 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:36,040 I'll see you in your late-40s. 118 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:38,960 Don't be ridiculous, Alma! 119 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:42,280 I would never have a baby shower without booze. 120 00:05:42,280 --> 00:05:45,520 Anyway, you're the one leaving to pursue your dreams. 121 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:48,480 You're finally getting out of here. 122 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:55,320 That's true. I am, aren't I? Yes. 123 00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:57,400 I don't have time for self-pity, 124 00:05:57,400 --> 00:06:00,640 I'm too busy, becoming a star. 125 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:01,680 Woo! 126 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:03,960 Star or not, get off me floor! 127 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:06,320 Oh, shut up, Bill. Fuck you, Leanne. 128 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:11,120 How could you? How could you do it?! 129 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:16,360 How could you do such an evil thing?! You disgust me! 130 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,000 Now, that were beltin', wasn't it? 131 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:34,280 Me bloody top. You all right, Lesley? Look, it's all stretched. 132 00:06:34,280 --> 00:06:36,000 But she really felt it, didn't she? 133 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,560 I did! Yeah, so did my top. 134 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:41,560 That's why she got into t'theatre company and you lot didn't. 135 00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:44,200 Me mam got me this and everything, it was new. 136 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:47,080 Oh, shut up moaning, Lesley. It's a minging top, anyway. 137 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,560 DOOR BANGS OPEN 138 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,720 SLURRING: I'm looking for me daughter. 139 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:55,680 She's going to be a star! 140 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:57,600 Mum, what are you doing? 141 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:02,240 I've just come to tell you that I'm OK with you abandoning me. 142 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:07,320 I'll be fine. I'm glad you're following your dreams. 143 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,080 Yeah, no, that's all right. 144 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:12,000 That's great. I should've been... Yeah. ..a star meself, 145 00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:14,680 but it's not that easy for all of us. Let's not go into that. 146 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:16,800 Not when your mum tells the doctor... Oh, no. 147 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:19,480 ..you're a loony-tune just after you've given birth. 148 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:23,040 Don't need to go into that, I don't think. I had postpartum. Yeah. 149 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:25,040 That's all it was! Yeah, probably. Come on. 150 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,760 I thought Simon Le Bon 151 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:30,720 was talking to me through the television. Yeah. 152 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:34,320 But who didn't? It was the '90s! Yeah. 153 00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:37,040 I still think he might have been. I'm sure he was. 154 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,480 Have you taken anything, Mum? 155 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:44,120 No. No, I've just had a bit of gin. I just needed it, Alma, 156 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:45,920 I needed to take the edge off. 157 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,680 OK. Yeah. Right, well, just, you stay there. 158 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,320 Yeah. I'm going to get my stuff. 159 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:52,920 Yes. Just stay right there. Right. Yeah. 160 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,880 Simon...Simon Le-bloody-Bon, 161 00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:03,080 and his Boomtown Rat, Shakermaker. 162 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:04,120 Phew. 163 00:08:07,080 --> 00:08:08,840 She's not in. 164 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:11,920 Right. Great. She's not in. 165 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,400 OK. Ready? Mm. 166 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:23,480 SHE BLOWS A RASPBERRY 167 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:26,800 Oh, you're going the rogue route? Yeah. 168 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:29,920 Are you sure about that? Yeah. 169 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:31,840 Good, yeah. Very good. 170 00:08:33,560 --> 00:08:35,680 I'd probably roll at this point. 171 00:08:35,680 --> 00:08:38,000 Just give it a... Yeah. Yeah. 172 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,640 Sorry, Alma. 173 00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:40,960 It's all right, Mum. 174 00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:43,960 But you can't do this again. 175 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,720 We need to stay on track. 176 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:55,720 You will get rehoused eventually, Mum. 177 00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:57,480 But if you relapse 178 00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,200 and they find out, you'll be screwed. 179 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,600 Well, don't leave me, then. 180 00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:02,880 I can't do this without you, Alma. 181 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:10,040 I know, Mum. It's all right. 182 00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,120 You just get some rest. 183 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:16,640 Mm. Hm. 184 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:21,520 Given Mum's current situation, 185 00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:25,440 it's probably not the right time to go gallivanting on tour. 186 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,520 But I'm not the first Nuttall woman to put her dreams on hold. 187 00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:30,720 Grandma did it. Where the bloody hell do you think 188 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:33,040 you're going dressed like that, Joanie? Mind your own. 189 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:35,200 MUSIC: Don't Bring Me Down by the Pretty Things 190 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:38,160 I'm on my own Just wanna roam 191 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,480 I tell you, man 192 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,080 Don't want a home 193 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:44,400 I wander round... 194 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,800 We could hitchhike to Dover, get a ferry 195 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:50,280 and travel through France. I want to see the world. I want to 196 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:52,520 eat a croissant, ride a camel. 197 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:55,280 BABY SCREAMS AND CRIES 198 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:06,320 And so did my mum. 199 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:10,080 Oh, shut up! What do you know, eh? What do you know? 200 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,120 Get out...and good riddance! 201 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:13,600 MUSIC: Stand Strong by Vice Squad 202 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:17,720 They'll tell you now you're old enough... 203 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:19,480 Oh, for God's sake, 204 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,560 what ARE you wearing? Mind your own. 205 00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:25,960 Don't you talk to me like that, you little madam! 206 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:31,320 So you'll always face the ground... 207 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,920 A scholarship to art college, 208 00:10:35,920 --> 00:10:41,200 can you believe it? I'll be whizzing round London, doing me art. 209 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,960 You're not going to fucking art college! 210 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:47,280 You need a proper job, a proper career. 211 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,400 BABY SCREAMS AND CRIES 212 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,160 SCREAMING CONTINUES 213 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:05,800 Oh! 214 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,280 SHE SCOFFS 215 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:11,560 As if! 216 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:19,560 SHE MOANS 217 00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:23,320 I think I'm allergic to alcohol. 218 00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:24,760 It's the sulphates. 219 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:30,840 Sulphates? You had six fishbowls. 220 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,200 This is an allergic reaction, Anthony. 221 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:34,960 HE SNIGGERS 222 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,040 Oh! 223 00:11:40,760 --> 00:11:43,440 I've got the appetite of a truck driver 224 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:46,360 and the constitution of a Victorian child. 225 00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:47,960 SHE SIGHS 226 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:50,800 I think you should drink fishbowls more often, me. 227 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:54,160 You were a right little nympho. Was I? Mm. Oh! 228 00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:57,600 THEY CHUCKLE Fabulous! Oh, wow. 229 00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,440 HE MUTTERS 230 00:11:59,440 --> 00:12:01,040 My insides are vibrating - 231 00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:02,680 that's not normal, that, is it? 232 00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:04,800 Oh, will you just stop moaning? 233 00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:06,600 Don't swish me, I'll be sick. 234 00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:09,920 SHE MOANS AND CLEARS HER THROAT 235 00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:15,160 I think you're right not to go on this tour, though. 236 00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:17,440 It'd be dead tight on your mum, wouldn't it? 237 00:12:20,920 --> 00:12:23,000 You're a cheeky fuck, aren't you? 238 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:25,800 SCOFFING: What?! I see right through you. 239 00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:32,200 Nah, I just think it's time for us to give it another go. 240 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,240 I'm not with Rachel any more... 241 00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:38,680 ..and, well, you're not off gallivanting. 242 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:45,040 Hm. I want you back, Alma. I need you. 243 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,680 I don't ever want to not have you. 244 00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:57,480 Oh, God. 245 00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,360 Do you think you can die from a hangover? 246 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,320 Ooft! 247 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:05,560 TV: Now, the remaining chefs... 248 00:13:05,560 --> 00:13:08,920 Well, I'm glad you're back. Aw, ta, Trish! 249 00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:11,680 I never liked Rachel anyway. 250 00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:13,560 Yeah, you did, Mum. 251 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:15,880 You're full of shit, you. No, I didn't, 252 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:19,080 I'm just a very well-mannered person, me. 253 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,040 TRISH BURPS 254 00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,200 Oh, you're a beast, is what you are. 255 00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:28,400 How come you've never got your own cigs? 256 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:31,520 Cos I've quit. Fuck's sake. 257 00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:35,680 TV: One of the youngest chefs to ever receive two Michelin stars. 258 00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:37,200 TRISH BURPS 259 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:40,000 DANCE MUSIC PLAYS Six, seven and woo! 260 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,320 You went a bit fast there, didn't you? Woohoo! 261 00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:44,440 Watch Cheryl - I'm teacher, watch me. 262 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:46,480 Here we go. One, and two, and three. That's it. 263 00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:47,960 You should've seen her, Leanne. 264 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:50,440 Pissed out of her head, she was. So I've decided... 265 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:53,800 ..I'm not going to go on the tour. 266 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,800 Fuck! You've got to go! 267 00:13:56,800 --> 00:14:00,240 It's just...it's too much of a risk. Pay attention, girls! 268 00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:01,960 Have you seen her nostrils flare? 269 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:04,480 CHERYL CLEARS HER THROAT That's it. 270 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:06,600 That's what we are here for, isn't it? 271 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,720 Get those lovely tight, fit bodies, girls. 272 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:09,760 PHONE BEEPS Oh! 273 00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:14,400 Who you texting? 274 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:15,800 Erm, just smear results. 275 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,840 All clear, so, just... 276 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:18,880 Anthony? 277 00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:22,040 You've got to be fucking kidding me! 278 00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:23,560 He's not that bad. 279 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:25,480 He's a narcissistic predator. 280 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:27,520 That's not all he is. 281 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:30,320 He's actually very charismatic and charming. 282 00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:31,880 So was Ted Bundy. 283 00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:40,400 Have you got any oat milk? 284 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:41,520 Eh? 285 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,200 What's with the plastic cups? 286 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:46,600 He's not allowed to touch pottery now, only plastic things. 287 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,320 Right. Tea's ready. 288 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,960 OK, let's do this. 289 00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:53,920 BOTH: One, two, three 290 00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:56,000 and pass. 291 00:14:56,000 --> 00:15:00,640 Two, three. Fantastic, Jim. Well done. 292 00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:04,360 We find the counting really helps him keep a steady hand. 293 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:06,160 There you go. 294 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:14,320 So, how have you been? 295 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:17,520 Bored! I've done fuck all since the last time you came round. 296 00:15:17,520 --> 00:15:20,960 Have you done anything about me housing yet? 297 00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,240 As I've explained before, Lin, 298 00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:24,880 this will take time. 299 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,320 So, the board are really supportive of you being 300 00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,040 independent at some point. 301 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,320 SHE SCOFFS 302 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:32,320 They just need to monitor your wellbeing 303 00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:33,960 and your progress for a little longer. 304 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:36,320 What else do they need to fucking monitor? 305 00:15:36,320 --> 00:15:38,960 I'm poked, prodded and plucked every fucking day! 306 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:43,800 Oh, do you know, the melodrama of my daughter is fucking suffocating me! 307 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:47,960 Me? You! You've always been a drama queen! 308 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:51,760 H-How dare you! I'm a wallflower! 309 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:55,120 Oh, yeah, 'course you are. My mother, the wallflower. 310 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:58,520 I know what you're about to say, and don't you start! 311 00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:01,880 OK? I did the best I could with the hand I was dealt. 312 00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:05,400 Fuck this! I've had enough! Oh, God! 313 00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:08,880 Mum! Where are you going? 314 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,880 I need to get out of here for a bit, I feel hemmed in. 315 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,560 Everything OK over there? 316 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:15,360 Yes, fine, thank you, Sandra. 317 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,680 She's a nosy fucking bitch. 318 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:20,320 Excuse me? It's horrible round here. 319 00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:23,520 Fucking Sandra poking her nose in every five seconds. 320 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:28,000 And everybody with the same fucking flower beds, one after the other, 321 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,760 because heaven forbid you might mix it up a bit 322 00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:32,720 and try summat different. 323 00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:35,520 Like a bunch of fucking fascists, this lot. 324 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:38,400 And, yes, that includes you, Sandra! 325 00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:41,720 Same day, every day... 326 00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:43,640 BING-BING-BING. 327 00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:45,840 "Ooh, there's my little alarm again. 328 00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:48,600 "I better get me little socks on me little feet 329 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:51,280 "and go downstairs, AGAIN." 330 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:54,800 "Hello, Julie." "Oh, hello, Sandra. 331 00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:57,320 "Fancy a cup of tea, Sandra?" 332 00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:59,520 "Oh, go on then, Julie." 333 00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,440 "Hang the washing up, Sandra." 334 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,320 "Do the pots, Julie." 335 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:06,880 "Eh, it's 8pm." 336 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:10,520 "Nearly time for bed, Julie." 337 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:13,880 "Oh, thank fuck for that, Sandra." 338 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,120 "Yes, what a relief. 339 00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,880 "The day is nearly fucking over. 340 00:17:18,880 --> 00:17:21,080 "Only two hours 341 00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:24,680 "and 40 fucking years to go!" 342 00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:26,160 Oh! 343 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:28,560 Oh! 344 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:30,280 DOG BARKS 345 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,520 And you're telling me she's on the mend? 346 00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:34,920 Do I need to call the police, ladies? 347 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:36,680 BOTH: Fuck off, Sandra. 348 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,320 Sue. 349 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:46,720 Do you know where my mum is? 350 00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:49,000 Tea Towel Tracy's. Right. 351 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,360 Who's that? Tracy. 352 00:17:52,360 --> 00:17:53,760 One hand. 353 00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:55,520 Wears a tea towel over her stump. 354 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,440 Sells smack on the side. 355 00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:59,360 Lovely. 356 00:17:59,360 --> 00:18:01,040 This one. 357 00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:15,160 Hello, Tracy, can I speak to...? 358 00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,040 Charming. 359 00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,240 Mum, it's time to go. 360 00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:25,040 I'm not coming back, Alma. 361 00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:28,240 Please, Mum? 362 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:32,040 You've been doing really well recently. 363 00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:35,960 We're all here to support you. 364 00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,120 Don't give up now. 365 00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:43,440 Two days. Just give me two days, Alma. 366 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,280 If you don't come back now, they're going to report you. 367 00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:50,160 I'm...I'm just blowing off a bit of steam, Alma. 368 00:18:51,160 --> 00:18:53,400 You can't be doing drugs, Mum, you know that. 369 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,600 It's Friday night. 370 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:58,000 Everybody blows off a bit of steam on Friday night. 371 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,960 Crack and smack are not normal ways to blow off steam, Mum. 372 00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:03,040 We all have our vices, Alma. 373 00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:05,480 You drink too much red wine. 374 00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:07,480 I've never locked myself in a bathroom 375 00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,360 and screamed at the walls on red wine, Mum. 376 00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:10,800 Not yet. 377 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:14,680 I'll be back in a couple of days. 378 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,040 No, Mum. 379 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:21,240 Either you come back now... 380 00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:23,960 ..or me and Grandma are going home 381 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,880 and this whole attempt to get you better will have failed. 382 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:32,280 I'm not prepared to help at the expense of mine 383 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:34,400 and Grandma's safety and sanity. 384 00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:38,240 You've got to do your bit as well. 385 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,880 I'll give you five seconds. 386 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:51,000 Mum? 387 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:03,200 Come on, love. 388 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:06,520 Let's go home, eh? 389 00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:08,920 SHE WHIMPERS 390 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:15,520 Poetry is no place for a heart that's a whore 391 00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:21,840 And I'm young and I'm strong 392 00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,640 But I feel old and tired 393 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:25,960 Overfired 394 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:29,880 And I've been poked and stoked 395 00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:33,160 It's all smoke There's no more fire 396 00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:34,960 Only desire 397 00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:38,440 For you, whoever you are 398 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,480 For you, whoever you are... 399 00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,320 She's fucked it, hasn't she? 400 00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,240 Yeah. 401 00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:52,000 SHE SIGHS 402 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:53,120 We came so close. 403 00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,520 Everything was there. 404 00:20:56,520 --> 00:21:01,720 A whole team of professionals committed to getting her well. 405 00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:03,200 I know. 406 00:21:05,120 --> 00:21:06,440 It's exhausting. 407 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:09,680 Well, I've been telling you that for years. 408 00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:12,720 All right, Grandma. It's not an "I told you so" moment. 409 00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:19,920 As soon as she was born, I knew something was wrong with her. 410 00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:21,960 I had that dream just days before. Yes. 411 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:23,760 The one about the slug. The one where the... 412 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:26,600 Yeah. Yeah. You gave birth to a giant, evil slug. 413 00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:29,360 I know. It was a message, that dream, Alma. 414 00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,280 I just knew. 415 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:38,360 From...From the moment she arrived, 416 00:21:38,360 --> 00:21:40,640 I knew everything was going to be terrifying. 417 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:42,840 And it was. 418 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,320 Mm. 419 00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:49,440 Do you know, when someone dies, you can go and put flowers 420 00:21:49,440 --> 00:21:54,160 on their grave and cry and wail and everybody gets it. 421 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,280 You know, people send you commiseration cards and you have 422 00:21:58,280 --> 00:22:01,880 anniversaries and self-contained spaces for your grief. 423 00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,840 But with someone like Mum, nobody gets it. 424 00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:07,720 Not even me. 425 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,280 How do you grieve for the living dead? 426 00:22:14,360 --> 00:22:16,280 I never wanted to be a mother. 427 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,240 I never felt maternal. 428 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,440 I never liked babies. 429 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,080 I wasn't interested in children. 430 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,480 Motherhood just happened to me. 431 00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:36,800 I'd have suited being a man much better. 432 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,440 Think you're probably right. 433 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,080 I wish I could've been... 434 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:46,800 ..better at it. 435 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,560 Kinder... 436 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:53,160 ..to you both. 437 00:22:55,360 --> 00:22:57,800 If I'd been in a different place... 438 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,320 If I'd been able to love more... 439 00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:03,600 SHE SOBS 440 00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:05,240 If I'd have had... 441 00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,000 You did your best, Grandma. 442 00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,520 SHE SNIFFLES 443 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,360 I want you to get out of this horrible fucking nightmare. 444 00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:24,160 This hangover of poverty and trauma that's lingered through 445 00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:28,160 the generations of women in our family... 446 00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:30,200 ..and taken our dreams from us... 447 00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,600 ..I want you to be the one that breaks free, Alma. 448 00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:45,200 No fucking pressure then, eh? 449 00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,560 THEY CHUCKLE 450 00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:52,760 You bloody motherfucking asshole 451 00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:56,520 Oh, you bloody motherfucking asshole 452 00:23:56,520 --> 00:24:01,120 Oh, you bloody motherfucking asshole 453 00:24:01,120 --> 00:24:05,200 Oh, you bloody motherfucking asshole 454 00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,760 Oh, you bloody motherfucking asshole... 455 00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:10,640 KNOCK AT DOOR 456 00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:12,560 You ready? Yeah. 457 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:18,280 Hello, come in. 458 00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:22,920 Take a seat. 459 00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,440 Do you want a drink? Yeah, ta. 460 00:24:35,360 --> 00:24:36,720 Leanne. 461 00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:39,960 What, you got the day off? Yeah. 462 00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:44,160 Right. So, I've decided - 463 00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,760 I'm going to go on the tour, Anthony. 464 00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:48,200 You what? Why? 465 00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:50,000 I thought...I thought we spoke about this. 466 00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,640 You weren't going to go cos of your mum and stuff. Mm, yes, I know. 467 00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:54,600 You did put in quite a good campaign, 468 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,080 but then I was just thinking to myself, 469 00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:01,400 you know, this bargain-basement offer of love you proposed me... 470 00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:04,840 ..I've decided - I don't think it's good enough. 471 00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,160 Oh, right! 472 00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:08,560 You have, have you? Right, OK. Yeah, I have. 473 00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:10,920 I mean, I know you've really tried recently to be lovely, 474 00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:13,600 and you have been quite lovely. Hasn't he? 475 00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:15,280 Hm, maybe not. 476 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:19,160 And you did almost make me forget what a fucking cunt-bag you can be. 477 00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:23,720 Right. OK. Really? 478 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,960 Right. So what I decided to do, is just write down a list, didn't I, 479 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,440 of just a few examples? Yeah, she did. 480 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,040 This is her doing, is it? No, I can write for myself. 481 00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,480 Can you? Yeah. Yeah, right, so if... 482 00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:39,560 Can I...? This is...this is fucking baffling, this. 483 00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:42,200 I mean, lists, security on't door. 484 00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:46,040 If you want to dump me, Alma, just do it in a normal way. 485 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,000 I'm not normal, though, am I? 486 00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:51,760 Number one, you shagged my old best mate behind my back. 487 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,600 I was just being friendly. 488 00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:55,600 We got a bit carried away. 489 00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:57,040 A bit too friendly. 490 00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,960 Number two, you gave me chlamydia five times. 491 00:25:59,960 --> 00:26:02,400 I practically had a VIP pass to the clap clinic. 492 00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,920 Yeah, we spoke about that. I apologised. 493 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:06,640 Number three. 494 00:26:06,640 --> 00:26:09,000 When we first broke up, you posted naked pictures of me 495 00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:10,280 all over the internet. 496 00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:12,840 Come on, that were funny, though. It got a big woof, that. 497 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:16,360 No, it was humiliating, and it was abuse. 498 00:26:16,360 --> 00:26:18,000 That's a bit dramatic. 499 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,720 And then you sent a video of us having sex to Leanne's Mum. 500 00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:22,200 Yeah, I was pissed off at the time. 501 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:24,000 Come on, we've all acted out of anger. 502 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,000 My mum wants to rip your fucking cock off. 503 00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:27,800 Oh, right, ta. She sounds delightful. 504 00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:30,400 I mean, I can't believe I went back when I'm looking at this list, 505 00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:33,120 to be honest. What number am I on now? Fuck knows. 506 00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:37,600 You smashed up nearly every phone I've ever had. 507 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:39,480 You've pulled out my hair. 508 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,240 SIT THE FUCK DOWN! 509 00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:45,400 You dumped me and knocked up a teenage girl, 510 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,040 and then you dumped her. 511 00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:50,240 You've told me every single day, in one way or another, 512 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:53,200 that I'm mad, ugly and unlovable. 513 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:54,560 Do you know what? 514 00:26:55,840 --> 00:26:58,960 I don't want to get stuck here with you. Yeah, all right, fine. 515 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:02,000 You don't want to go out with me, fine. 516 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:03,480 Yeah, I know what I am. 517 00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:05,520 Right? I've tried. 518 00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:08,200 I-I've really tried not to be a cunt. 519 00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:11,760 But I am one. 520 00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:14,280 I know. 521 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:17,480 Can I go now? Yeah. 522 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:21,480 And I suggest you go back to the mother of your child 523 00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,760 and provide them with the love and support that they deserve. 524 00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:26,240 Noted. 525 00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:40,880 Yeah, and don't come back. 526 00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:42,280 DOOR SHUTS 527 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,200 Woo! I did it. 528 00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:46,960 I've done it. 529 00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:49,480 I did the whole list and he's gone. 530 00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:51,320 I'm free! You're free! 531 00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:53,560 Yes! 532 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:57,040 Uptight downtown 533 00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:02,040 All the blue lights fighting with the crowds 534 00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:05,600 And now I know the temperature is rising 535 00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:06,800 Is rising... 536 00:28:06,800 --> 00:28:08,600 I'm going on tour. 537 00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:12,240 Uptight downtown 538 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,800 All the blue lights fighting with the crowds 539 00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:21,280 And now I know the temperature is rising 540 00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:23,520 Is rising 541 00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:26,040 The streets are lined with people 542 00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:30,960 With nothing left to lose, lose, lose 543 00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:34,200 When did all these people 544 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:37,320 Decide to change their shoes, shoes, shoes...? 545 00:28:37,370 --> 00:28:41,920 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 40362

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