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1
00:00:00,583 --> 00:00:04,963
[Theme music]
2
00:00:10,969 --> 00:00:18,639
Love, exciting and new.
3
00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:19,477
Come aboard.
4
00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:26,784
We're expecting you.
5
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:34,780
And love, life's
sweetest reward.
6
00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:38,658
Let it flow.
7
00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:42,127
It floats back to you.
8
00:00:42,208 --> 00:00:51,798
The love boat, soon we'll
be making another run.
9
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:58,305
The love boat promises
something for everyone.
10
00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:03,271
Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.
11
00:01:06,816 --> 00:01:14,986
And love won't hurt anymore.
12
00:01:15,074 --> 00:01:23,374
It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.
13
00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:24,418
It's love.
14
00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:28,586
Welcome aboard.
15
00:01:28,671 --> 00:01:30,341
It's love.
16
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:01,957
Hi, I'm George boggs.
17
00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:05,038
This is my partner, irwin budge.
18
00:02:05,124 --> 00:02:06,084
And, um?
19
00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:08,337
Oh, this is Ms. Peterson.
20
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:09,419
Gopher: Welcome aboard.
21
00:02:09,504 --> 00:02:11,554
Ah, Mr. Boggs and Ms.
Peterson, you're in fiesta
22
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:12,841
cabin 130.
23
00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:15,554
And Mr. Budge, aloha
deck, cabin 340.
24
00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:15,965
I hope you enjoy our cruise.
25
00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:17,432
Thank you.
26
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:18,562
George, I really
think I should
27
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:20,598
stay home and watch the office.
28
00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:23,062
Forget the office
for a while, will you?
29
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:26,443
We worked very hard to make
that big $200,000 commission.
30
00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:28,731
And I'm not going to celebrate
it without my partner.
31
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,395
You're a good friend, George.
32
00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:32,073
Ah.
33
00:02:32,151 --> 00:02:33,571
Go change your clothes.
34
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,243
See you later in the bar.
35
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:37,201
Ok.
36
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:38,072
George, that was really nice.
37
00:02:38,157 --> 00:02:40,117
I've been your
bookkeeper over a year,
38
00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:41,911
and I never realized you
felt that way about him.
39
00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,705
Hey, inside I'm a marshmallow.
40
00:02:44,789 --> 00:02:47,749
As a matter of fact, I'm doing
something even nicer for him.
41
00:02:47,834 --> 00:02:48,754
You can help.
- Sure.
42
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:50,245
How?
43
00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:52,256
George: Well, there's a tax
man coming to the office today.
44
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:53,508
I'm going to duck back
and handle a meeting.
45
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:56,930
It's nothing, but I don't
want to bother irwin with it.
46
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:59,430
You mean I'm going to be on
the love boat all by myself?
47
00:02:59,512 --> 00:03:01,432
We've got to keep irwin happy.
48
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:03,524
He's had a big offer to go
to the Phillips company.
49
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:06,390
I'll catch a plane, get back
on the ship at the mazatl n.
50
00:03:06,477 --> 00:03:12,277
And remember, not a word to
anyone that I'm not on board.
51
00:03:12,358 --> 00:03:14,318
Put that in my cabin,
will you, babe?
52
00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:16,282
[Music playing]
53
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:19,282
Excuse me, Ms. Peterson,
did you lose something?
54
00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:22,785
Boy, I sure did.
55
00:03:22,869 --> 00:03:24,789
Hi, I'm Pam rhodes.
56
00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:25,621
Well, hi.
57
00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:26,915
Welcome aboard.
58
00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:28,498
Uh, I'm Dorothy may.
59
00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:29,673
We're with the sunrise club.
60
00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:31,631
Gee, I hope they'll be
some interesting men board.
61
00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:35,301
Well, there's usually
one, sometimes even two.
62
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,131
Pam, Dorothy!
63
00:03:37,216 --> 00:03:38,426
Ahoy.
64
00:03:38,509 --> 00:03:41,639
Doug: Hey, this ought to
be a, uh, swell cruise.
65
00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:43,811
Uh, I hear there's even
going to be a pool party
66
00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:44,640
right after we leave port.
67
00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:46,814
Let's-- we better
get unpacked.
68
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:48,563
Come on.
69
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:50,935
[Music playing]
70
00:03:51,022 --> 00:03:52,232
Hi, I'm Doug Bridges.
71
00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:56,025
Uh, that Pam is really
something, isn't she?
72
00:03:56,110 --> 00:03:58,490
She's the whole reason I
joined the sunrise club.
73
00:03:58,571 --> 00:04:00,821
You know, I'm counting on
the old love boat magic
74
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:01,817
to win her over.
75
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,278
[Scoffs]
76
00:04:03,368 --> 00:04:05,828
If it doesn't happen, I guess
I'll just jump overboard.
77
00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:07,332
[Laughing]
78
00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:07,913
I hope the magic works.
79
00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:10,247
I hope he can swim.
80
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,633
[Laughing]
81
00:04:11,709 --> 00:04:13,539
Are you sure Ms.
Bradley's suite is ready?
82
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:14,748
It's perfect, captain.
83
00:04:14,837 --> 00:04:16,507
There's fresh fruit everywhere,
and there's more plants
84
00:04:16,589 --> 00:04:18,009
and flowers than jungle land.
85
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,591
Still, I think you
better double check.
86
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,177
[Music playing]
87
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,182
There she is!
88
00:04:23,262 --> 00:04:23,892
Linda!
89
00:04:23,972 --> 00:04:25,012
Hi, Vicki.
90
00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:27,348
Oh, I'm so glad to see you.
91
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,143
So good to see you.
92
00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:30,807
I missed you.
93
00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:32,975
It's good to see you
again, Ms. Bradley.
94
00:04:33,064 --> 00:04:34,154
Hi, Isaac.
95
00:04:34,232 --> 00:04:35,652
Uh, listen, Vicki, we've
done a lot of work to do.
96
00:04:35,733 --> 00:04:36,073
Come on.
97
00:04:36,150 --> 00:04:37,610
What work?
98
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:39,324
Oh, right.
99
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:40,284
See you later, Linda.
100
00:04:40,363 --> 00:04:43,123
Ok.
101
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:43,699
Hi.
102
00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:46,873
Hi.
103
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:47,913
Oh!
104
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:53,246
I missed you so much.
105
00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:56,924
I want to cram a whole lifetime
into the next few days.
106
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:59,665
I'll devote myself to it.
107
00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:02,337
Who's going to steer the ship?
108
00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:05,637
What ship?
109
00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:07,352
[Music playing]
110
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,310
[Ship's horn blaring]
111
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:17,440
[Music playing]
112
00:05:17,525 --> 00:05:18,275
Line to port.
113
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:24,240
[Music playing]
114
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:44,090
Hi, Pam.
115
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:46,677
Oh, hi.
116
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,933
Hey, this is a
great party, isn't it?
117
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,846
Mm-hmm.
118
00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:56,105
Uh, listen, uh, if
you're not busy tonight,
119
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,859
maybe you and I could,
uh, go to the dance--
120
00:05:58,941 --> 00:05:59,941
I'm kind of tied up.
121
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:01,646
Excuse me.
122
00:06:01,736 --> 00:06:05,026
[Sighs]
123
00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:12,538
[Music playing]
124
00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:16,462
Who's that guy Pam's with?
125
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:19,632
I've never seen him at
any of the club meetings.
126
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:20,842
Oh, no, he's not a member.
127
00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:23,382
That's Paul Murphy--
the Paul Murphy.
128
00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:24,796
No, I've never heard of him.
129
00:06:24,884 --> 00:06:25,894
You must have.
130
00:06:25,968 --> 00:06:27,218
His name is always
in the columns
131
00:06:27,303 --> 00:06:28,643
dating models and actresses.
132
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:30,521
Huh.
133
00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:32,558
He doesn't look like
anything special.
134
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,482
What's he got that
I haven't got?
135
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,270
Publicity.
136
00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:43,494
Hey, listen, are you
ready for a great idea?
137
00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,319
As long as you're
having a lousy time
138
00:06:45,404 --> 00:06:47,664
and I'm having a lousy
time, why don't we
139
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:48,990
plan the rest of the
afternoon together,
140
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:49,825
and make it a total loss?
141
00:06:49,909 --> 00:06:51,869
[Scoffs]
142
00:06:51,953 --> 00:06:54,333
No, I'm really not in
much of a party mood.
143
00:06:54,413 --> 00:06:57,833
Hey, Doug, don't
let it bother you.
144
00:06:57,917 --> 00:06:58,997
A lot of nice guys
get along just great
145
00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:01,585
without phony-baloney notoriety.
146
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:05,881
Yeah, but, you know, it
does seem to help, doesn't it?
147
00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:09,677
[Music playing]
148
00:07:11,848 --> 00:07:14,728
[Water splashing]
149
00:07:14,809 --> 00:07:18,099
[Music playing]
150
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,016
Hi.
151
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:21,727
Oh, hi.
152
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:22,976
Have a seat.
153
00:07:23,067 --> 00:07:24,687
Isaac, oh, we're ready.
154
00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:27,027
Just like you ordered,
irwin, a special
155
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:29,953
drink for a very special lady.
156
00:07:30,032 --> 00:07:33,542
Is that what you said,
for a very special lady?
157
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:34,039
Well, you are.
158
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,960
That's funny.
159
00:07:36,038 --> 00:07:37,668
I don't think you
ever noticed before.
160
00:07:37,748 --> 00:07:38,538
Oh, I have.
161
00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:40,294
I-- I do.
162
00:07:40,376 --> 00:07:43,046
I look at you all the
time in the office.
163
00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:45,669
Well, not that way.
164
00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:46,506
Well, that's ok.
165
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:47,931
After all, you are a bachelor.
166
00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:50,389
How did you know that?
167
00:07:50,469 --> 00:07:51,469
Well, remember me?
168
00:07:51,554 --> 00:07:53,604
I'm the one that fills
out the w-2 tax forms.
169
00:07:53,681 --> 00:07:55,891
Irwin budge, no dependents.
170
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,595
That's right.
171
00:07:57,685 --> 00:07:59,435
Irwin budge, no dependents.
172
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:05,070
That's what I've always
wanted, a dependent.
173
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:06,151
I really would like
to put something
174
00:08:06,235 --> 00:08:07,735
besides a zero on that form.
175
00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:13,241
There sure are a
lot of things to do
176
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:15,236
here, shuffleboard and movies.
177
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:15,908
And there's a big dance tonight.
178
00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:17,615
Dance?
179
00:08:17,705 --> 00:08:18,205
Mm-hmm.
180
00:08:18,289 --> 00:08:19,709
I do love to dance.
181
00:08:19,790 --> 00:08:21,790
Do you?
182
00:08:21,876 --> 00:08:23,246
Uh-huh.
183
00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:26,916
Well, then maybe you and i--
184
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:32,086
ugh, do you think George will
be up on his feet by tonight?
185
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:34,008
Not a chance.
186
00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:34,846
That's too bad.
187
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:40,101
No, I mean, it
really is too bad.
188
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:43,056
[Music playing]
189
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:52,951
[Knocking]
190
00:08:53,032 --> 00:08:53,742
Yes?
191
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,203
Message for captain stubing.
192
00:08:58,287 --> 00:09:00,707
That's captain stubing sir.
193
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,040
Oh, sir, yes, sir.
194
00:09:02,124 --> 00:09:03,504
[Laughing]
195
00:09:03,584 --> 00:09:06,214
Gopher knew I was coming up,
so he asked me to deliver it--
196
00:09:06,295 --> 00:09:09,625
obviously, a passionate
cable from a lovesick lady.
197
00:09:09,715 --> 00:09:11,045
[Laughing]
198
00:09:11,133 --> 00:09:12,513
Oh, it's from the commodore.
199
00:09:12,593 --> 00:09:14,053
I'm surprised he remembered.
200
00:09:14,136 --> 00:09:17,306
I'm celebrating my 10th
anniversary with the company.
201
00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:19,600
Well, congratulations!
202
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:20,984
An anniversary, huh?
203
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,650
That's nice.
204
00:09:22,728 --> 00:09:30,648
There are other anniversaries
that are much nicer.
205
00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:32,356
I've cleared the entire day.
206
00:09:32,446 --> 00:09:34,406
What would you like to do?
207
00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:36,990
Just be with you.
208
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:39,946
That you can be for
a long, long time.
209
00:09:40,037 --> 00:09:42,417
[Laughing]
210
00:09:42,498 --> 00:09:44,578
I've got to write
up some reports.
211
00:09:44,667 --> 00:09:45,497
See you later.
212
00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:47,634
Ok.
213
00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:48,502
Whoa!
Whoa!
214
00:09:48,587 --> 00:09:49,707
Wait a minute.
What happened to you?
215
00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:50,877
This wild, crazy person.
216
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:52,005
- Oh no.
- I never had a chance.
217
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:52,931
Don't talk.
Go easy now.
218
00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:56,349
Hey, doc!
219
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,179
Doc, get in here fast!
220
00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,564
Doc, this guy has been mugged.
221
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:00,730
See if you can
stop the bleeding.
222
00:10:00,808 --> 00:10:02,348
Ju-- that's not blood.
223
00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:03,265
It's lipstick.
224
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:04,102
Lipstick!
225
00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:05,266
The guy who did
it wore lipstick.
226
00:10:05,354 --> 00:10:06,694
He shouldn't be
that hard to spot.
227
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:09,112
It-- it wasn't a man.
228
00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:10,281
It was a girl.
229
00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:11,319
A girl?
230
00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,492
How could a girl mug you?
231
00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:16,531
Well, she didn't
exactly mug me.
232
00:10:16,615 --> 00:10:20,365
She-- boy, this is embarrassing.
233
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,123
All right, just
tell us what happened.
234
00:10:22,204 --> 00:10:23,164
Yeah.
235
00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:26,077
And don't leave anything out.
236
00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:29,627
I-- I was walking
down the passageway.
237
00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:30,882
And she grabbed me from behind.
238
00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:31,553
Wait a minute.
239
00:10:31,630 --> 00:10:33,220
He do you know it was a she?
240
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:36,049
Gopher, let him
tell his story.
241
00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:38,295
She pushed me in
the closet and started
242
00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:41,557
hugging me and kissing me.
243
00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:42,560
But you're ok?
244
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:43,391
Well, of course he's ok, doc.
He's fine.
245
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,346
Now look, could
you identify her?
246
00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:46,596
Did she say anything?
247
00:10:46,687 --> 00:10:47,307
What?
248
00:10:47,396 --> 00:10:49,226
What did she say?
249
00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:50,225
Do I have to tell you?
250
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:51,226
- Well, not unless--
- stay out of this!
251
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,067
What did she say?
She had to say something.
252
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:53,572
Come on.
253
00:10:53,652 --> 00:10:57,912
Feel so cheap.
254
00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:00,450
She just kept whispering,
[Breathing heavily]
255
00:11:00,534 --> 00:11:03,004
You're irresistible.
256
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:05,919
I can't keep my
hands off of you.
257
00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:12,918
Whoa, doc-- sex-starved female
loose on the ship attacking
258
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:15,665
men in broad daylight.
259
00:11:15,758 --> 00:11:19,138
Has anything like this
ever happened to you before?
260
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,390
No, never.
261
00:11:20,471 --> 00:11:21,101
Me neither.
262
00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,970
[Music playing]
263
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:31,105
Ok.
264
00:11:31,190 --> 00:11:34,030
If this report is accurate,
just sign right there.
265
00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:35,780
Oh, sir.
266
00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:36,111
I was just going
to look for you.
267
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:37,985
Yes?
268
00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:40,282
Uh, sir, one of our
passengers has been attacked.
269
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:41,526
Attacked?
270
00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:42,867
Uh, well, maybe that's
too strong a word, sir.
271
00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:46,462
I guess you might call it
more of an emotional mugging.
272
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,619
[Phone ringing in background]
273
00:11:48,707 --> 00:11:50,787
Here's the young man
involved, sir, Mr. Bridges.
274
00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:52,746
Good work, gopher.
275
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:53,547
I want you to know, sir,
we will prosecute this
276
00:11:53,629 --> 00:11:55,459
to the full extent of the law.
277
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:56,508
Sir, no, no, no, no, no.
278
00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:57,800
You got it all wrong.
279
00:11:57,883 --> 00:11:59,143
A girl did it.
280
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:00,638
Mr. Bridges is the victim.
281
00:12:00,719 --> 00:12:02,469
The victim?
282
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:06,345
Yeah, you might say, uh, he's
the violatee not the violator.
283
00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:12,154
A girl threw you in a closet
and called you irresistible.
284
00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:13,611
[Scoffs]
285
00:12:13,691 --> 00:12:16,281
Yes, well, um, I must make
sure this doesn't happen again.
286
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,610
No chance.
287
00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:18,565
You've got 20 crewmen
patrolling that corridor.
288
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:20,244
Well, why did
you assign so many?
289
00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:21,912
I didn't.
290
00:12:21,991 --> 00:12:22,951
They volunteered.
291
00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:24,953
Oh, this is embarrassing.
292
00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:28,285
Look, I'm going to hole up in
my cabin for a little while.
293
00:12:31,333 --> 00:12:32,043
Curious, hm.
294
00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:32,326
Gopher.
295
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,038
Hm?
296
00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,338
When you apprehend the
young lady who did this,
297
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,261
I want to see her.
298
00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:37,839
Well, you'll have
to take a number.
299
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:39,473
So does everyone else.
300
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:41,010
Ah, right away, sir.
301
00:12:41,093 --> 00:12:42,263
You'll be number one.
302
00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:44,054
I mean, you'll be the
first to know, uh--
303
00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:49,975
[music playing]
304
00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:53,149
[Knocking]
305
00:12:53,230 --> 00:12:55,110
Yes?
306
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:56,191
Hi, Vicki.
307
00:12:56,275 --> 00:12:57,895
Come on in.
308
00:12:57,985 --> 00:12:59,195
Let me see you.
309
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,568
Ah, don't you look nice.
310
00:13:01,655 --> 00:13:03,155
Oh, so do you.
311
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:04,330
I can see why the captain--
312
00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:06,618
[laughing]
313
00:13:06,702 --> 00:13:09,042
I have a feeling you
know something I don't.
314
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:10,081
But I can't tell you.
315
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:11,044
It's a secret.
316
00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,213
Oh.
317
00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:14,381
Well, if, uh-- if I
guess it, then it won't
318
00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:17,050
be a secret anymore, right?
319
00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:18,759
Will you tell me
if I guess right?
320
00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:20,089
Well, sure, but
you'll never guess.
321
00:13:20,174 --> 00:13:21,764
Ok.
322
00:13:21,842 --> 00:13:24,472
Is it about somebody I know?
323
00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:25,553
You?
324
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:26,258
No.
325
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,387
Oh, your dad?
326
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:31,104
Ah, something special?
327
00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:32,805
Mm-hmm.
328
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:34,305
I think I know what it is.
329
00:13:34,396 --> 00:13:35,356
You do?
330
00:13:35,439 --> 00:13:37,569
Well, I had a
little hint earlier.
331
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:40,240
Oh, then you know
he's going to propose.
332
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:44,529
[Music playing]
333
00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:46,865
Wasn't that your guess?
334
00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:50,831
Uh, oh, I thought it was a--
335
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:53,583
a surprise something
for his anniversary.
336
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:54,536
Oh, well, you would have
guessed it next anyway.
337
00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,995
Isn't it the greatest?
338
00:13:57,086 --> 00:13:59,256
Yeah.
339
00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:01,628
Vicki, sweetheart, would
you do me a big favor?
340
00:14:01,715 --> 00:14:03,295
I have a lot of
things to do now, ok?
341
00:14:03,384 --> 00:14:04,434
Do you mind?
342
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:05,220
Hm, sure.
343
00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:06,352
See you later then.
[Kissing]
344
00:14:06,428 --> 00:14:07,348
Bye, sweetheart.
345
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:08,139
Bye.
346
00:14:10,808 --> 00:14:11,768
Oh, and don't worry.
347
00:14:11,850 --> 00:14:14,650
I won't let dad
know that you know.
348
00:14:14,728 --> 00:14:17,688
[Music playing]
349
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,080
Three hours.
350
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:36,916
The news should have
gotten around by now.
351
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:47,797
Hi, Doug.
352
00:14:47,886 --> 00:14:49,006
Is everything ok?
353
00:14:49,096 --> 00:14:50,136
Yeah, not too bad.
354
00:14:50,222 --> 00:14:52,892
Uh, Doug, we had to
inform the security people.
355
00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:55,135
So word may have
leaked out about you
356
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,937
being dragged into that closet.
357
00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:58,151
I'm sorry, but--
358
00:14:58,230 --> 00:14:59,860
well, I guess the story was
bound to get around anyway.
359
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:02,570
Gopher: Still, I don't
think the passengers will
360
00:15:02,651 --> 00:15:03,111
make much of a fuss over it.
361
00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:17,878
The story must
be true, all right.
362
00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:19,418
He was with the doctor?
363
00:15:19,501 --> 00:15:21,301
Poor guy.
364
00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:24,378
There must be something
about him I missed.
365
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:27,175
I always thought he
was kind of special.
366
00:15:27,259 --> 00:15:28,339
I'll let you know
if you're right.
367
00:15:32,431 --> 00:15:34,771
I'm sure they'll forget
about it soon enough.
368
00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:36,190
Don't worry about it, doc.
369
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:38,398
Everything's working
out just fine.
370
00:15:38,479 --> 00:15:38,809
Pam: Doug?
371
00:15:38,896 --> 00:15:40,056
Hi, Doug.
372
00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:43,687
Gosh, I haven't seen much
of your around tonight.
373
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,986
Well, I have
been kind of busy.
374
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:47,240
So I hear.
375
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:50,491
Say, there's a moonlight party
up on the lido deck tonight.
376
00:15:50,574 --> 00:15:52,414
Would you be interested?
377
00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:53,453
Sure.
378
00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:56,745
Oh, good, so would I. Come on.
379
00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:59,790
[Music playing]
380
00:16:35,202 --> 00:16:38,502
[Applause]
381
00:16:43,043 --> 00:16:45,093
Ladies and
gentlemen, the judges
382
00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:47,130
have unanimously
agree that the winners
383
00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:49,764
of the pacific
Princess dance contest
384
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,342
are Marge petersen
and irwin budge.
385
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,177
Congratulations!
386
00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:53,722
[Applause]
- Thank you.
387
00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:55,434
Congratulations.
388
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,314
What-- what?
Did you hear?
389
00:16:56,390 --> 00:16:56,640
We won.
390
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,524
Yes!
391
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,100
I've never won anything in
my life, all thanks to you.
392
00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:02,436
[Scoffs]
393
00:17:02,521 --> 00:17:06,441
[Kissing]
394
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:09,025
I'm sorry.
395
00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:10,451
Please, forgive me.
396
00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:11,239
I didn't mean--
397
00:17:11,321 --> 00:17:13,871
[scoffs]
398
00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:14,449
I'm sorry.
399
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:18,253
[Music playing]
400
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:28,379
Irwin?
401
00:17:28,464 --> 00:17:29,884
What's the matter?
402
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:33,135
I know what you
must think of me.
403
00:17:33,218 --> 00:17:34,548
I don't think you do.
404
00:17:34,636 --> 00:17:35,796
I don't know
what came over me.
405
00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,058
I'm-- I must have gone crazy.
406
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:39,770
Well, I don't
think it's so crazy.
407
00:17:39,850 --> 00:17:40,640
It won't happen
again, Marge, I swear.
408
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,556
I won't touch you.
409
00:17:42,644 --> 00:17:43,984
I won't even come near you.
410
00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,819
[Music playing]
411
00:17:50,652 --> 00:17:52,362
[Laughing]
412
00:17:52,446 --> 00:17:53,816
Well, I want to
thank all of you.
413
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:57,986
Because of people like you,
I've had a wonderful life
414
00:17:58,076 --> 00:17:59,076
for the past 10 years.
415
00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:03,081
And it just keeps getting
better all the time.
416
00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,915
Now is the time to
hit into for the raise.
417
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:05,670
[Laughter]
418
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:06,381
All right.
419
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:07,840
Julie, handle this, will you?
420
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:08,750
Uh, be sure to save
a slice for Vicki.
421
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:11,377
Oh, sir, sir, sir.
422
00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:12,545
All these telegrams
came for you--
423
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:13,013
what?
424
00:18:13,091 --> 00:18:14,471
--And Linda.
425
00:18:14,551 --> 00:18:14,801
There's one for you.
426
00:18:14,885 --> 00:18:15,215
For me?
427
00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:21,810
Oh, it's from sven laarson,
captain of the venture.
428
00:18:21,892 --> 00:18:23,642
We'll be passing you tonight.
429
00:18:23,727 --> 00:18:27,147
Don't celebrate too
much and bump into me.
430
00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:29,981
[Laughing]
431
00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,107
Is something wrong?
432
00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:34,953
No, no, nothing, just a
belated bon voyage from some
433
00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:35,860
envious friends.
434
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,698
[Laughing]
435
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,033
Well, we can handle this later.
436
00:18:39,117 --> 00:18:40,197
There's a full moon out.
437
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:40,735
[Applause in background]
438
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:43,158
Let's inspect it.
439
00:18:43,247 --> 00:18:46,667
Um, that music sounded great.
440
00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:49,210
Why don't we dance?
441
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:50,884
Dancing it shall be.
442
00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:51,633
Excuse us.
443
00:18:51,713 --> 00:18:54,473
Mm-hmm.
444
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:58,010
[Music playing]
445
00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:01,353
Did, uh, she seem
a little upset?
446
00:19:01,431 --> 00:19:05,981
Well, there must have been
something on that cablegram.
447
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:09,061
[Music playing]
448
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,444
Hi.
449
00:19:14,528 --> 00:19:18,948
Isaac, what's the
strongest drink you've got?
450
00:19:19,032 --> 00:19:19,992
Well, I make a
special Martini,
451
00:19:20,075 --> 00:19:22,575
but it's by prescription only.
452
00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:25,041
If it will help me
forget, give me one.
453
00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:25,712
Mm.
454
00:19:25,789 --> 00:19:28,249
Things that bad, huh?
455
00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:31,253
You're looking at a
no-good, double-crossing heel.
456
00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:32,706
I've been on the ship one day.
457
00:19:32,796 --> 00:19:34,756
And already, I've tried to steal
my best friend's girl while he
458
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,630
lies sick and helpless in bed.
459
00:19:36,717 --> 00:19:38,427
What do you think of that?
460
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:39,720
Well, um, not much.
461
00:19:39,803 --> 00:19:42,603
But it's a start.
462
00:19:42,681 --> 00:19:44,931
Here you go, a Texas Martini.
463
00:19:45,017 --> 00:19:47,897
Can you give me some advice?
464
00:19:47,978 --> 00:19:48,308
Yeah, don't drink it.
465
00:19:51,940 --> 00:19:55,530
Irwin, nobody can tell
someone what to do.
466
00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,781
But why don't you try
being honest with him,
467
00:19:57,863 --> 00:20:00,283
and tell them how things are?
468
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:02,485
I can't go near him.
469
00:20:02,576 --> 00:20:04,696
He's got the flu.
470
00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,786
Use the phone.
471
00:20:06,872 --> 00:20:09,212
[Phone ringing]
472
00:20:11,543 --> 00:20:12,463
Hello?
473
00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:12,924
This is irwin.
474
00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:14,803
Oh, hi, irwin.
475
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,800
Irwin (oh phone): Uh,
let me talk to George.
476
00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:18,132
Oh, well, i--
477
00:20:18,216 --> 00:20:18,796
I can't.
478
00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:19,974
He's sleeping.
479
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:20,802
This is important.
480
00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:23,306
Wake him up.
481
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:24,768
All right, but he
is going to be groggy.
482
00:20:31,396 --> 00:20:32,306
(Deeply) Yeah?
483
00:20:32,397 --> 00:20:34,777
George, this is irwin.
484
00:20:34,858 --> 00:20:36,818
I know you're sick, so you
don't have to say anything.
485
00:20:36,902 --> 00:20:40,782
I-- I have to get this
off my conscience.
486
00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:42,574
I've been seeing a
lot of Marge lately.
487
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:43,828
It wasn't her idea.
488
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:45,119
It was mine.
489
00:20:45,202 --> 00:20:48,042
Because I fell in love with her.
490
00:20:48,121 --> 00:20:48,961
I'm sorry, George.
491
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:50,209
I just couldn't
help myself, but I
492
00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:54,880
promise you that I'll stay away
from her from-- from now on.
493
00:20:54,962 --> 00:21:00,262
But that won't be easy,
because she is so wonderful.
494
00:21:00,342 --> 00:21:02,092
Well, I hope you feel better.
495
00:21:02,177 --> 00:21:05,057
[Receiver clicks]
496
00:21:05,138 --> 00:21:07,518
[Sighs]
497
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:09,889
[Music playing]
498
00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:17,784
Gopher (over loudspeaker):
Ladies and gentleman,
499
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:19,819
welcome to mazatl n.
500
00:21:19,903 --> 00:21:22,913
Land tours will be
leaving in one half hour.
501
00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:25,950
[Music playing]
502
00:21:34,042 --> 00:21:37,842
Mazatl n, it's a great place.
503
00:21:37,921 --> 00:21:40,881
Yeah, I remember.
504
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,966
I was here a while
back with some sailor.
505
00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:44,301
Oh, was that you?
506
00:21:44,386 --> 00:21:45,006
Mm.
507
00:21:45,095 --> 00:21:46,425
It had better have been me.
508
00:21:49,641 --> 00:21:51,891
I wonder if that guitarist
is still at that little place
509
00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:53,057
near the beach.
510
00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:56,815
It might be
worth looking into.
511
00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:58,608
Give me a minute.
512
00:21:58,692 --> 00:21:59,742
I'll check with the bridge.
513
00:21:59,818 --> 00:22:05,118
Merrill, I'm sorry I was
so out of it last night.
514
00:22:05,198 --> 00:22:05,948
[Scoffs]
515
00:22:06,033 --> 00:22:08,293
I guess it was all
the excitement.
516
00:22:08,368 --> 00:22:09,658
You're feeling
better today, huh?
517
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:11,365
Oh, much.
518
00:22:11,455 --> 00:22:13,575
All I need now is a--
519
00:22:13,665 --> 00:22:19,795
is a little quiet and a handsome
sea captain very, very close.
520
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,470
[Music playing]
521
00:22:27,471 --> 00:22:28,641
[Sighs]
522
00:22:28,722 --> 00:22:33,562
Well, the anniversary cruise
is starting to look promising.
523
00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:39,819
I'll meet you on the gangway.
524
00:22:47,324 --> 00:22:50,204
[Kissing]
525
00:22:54,706 --> 00:22:57,036
[Birds squawking]
526
00:22:57,709 --> 00:22:59,459
Did he propose just now?
527
00:22:59,544 --> 00:23:00,304
Huh?
528
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:01,958
Oh-- oh, of course not.
529
00:23:02,047 --> 00:23:04,467
Well, it never happens
in broad daylight.
530
00:23:04,549 --> 00:23:07,049
Don't you read all
those trashy novels?
531
00:23:07,135 --> 00:23:08,675
I can't wait.
532
00:23:08,762 --> 00:23:11,102
It's going to be so
neat having you here.
533
00:23:11,181 --> 00:23:13,561
I couldn't wish
for anything more.
534
00:23:13,642 --> 00:23:16,942
Oh, sweetheart, don't let
your wishes run away with you.
535
00:23:17,020 --> 00:23:18,980
What do you mean?
536
00:23:19,064 --> 00:23:22,234
Well, some of the
things we wish for
537
00:23:22,317 --> 00:23:22,527
aren't the things that happen.
538
00:23:26,905 --> 00:23:31,575
I mean, sometimes,
all they can be
539
00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:37,830
or really should be are wishes.
540
00:23:37,916 --> 00:23:41,546
[Music playing]
541
00:23:43,755 --> 00:23:45,625
[Water splashing]
542
00:23:47,634 --> 00:23:49,934
[Music playing]
543
00:23:56,309 --> 00:23:58,019
What's the matter with irwin?
544
00:23:58,103 --> 00:23:58,693
Well, a hangover,
among other things.
545
00:23:58,770 --> 00:24:00,360
Oh.
546
00:24:00,438 --> 00:24:01,358
Well, I'll take that to him.
547
00:24:01,439 --> 00:24:02,859
Uh, forgive me,
Ms. Peterson, but I
548
00:24:02,941 --> 00:24:04,441
don't think that's a good idea.
549
00:24:04,526 --> 00:24:05,686
Let me check with
irwin first, ok?
550
00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:06,437
Ok.
551
00:24:09,698 --> 00:24:12,158
Julie (over loudspeaker):
Attention, please.
552
00:24:12,242 --> 00:24:13,202
The buses to the
mazatl n tour will be
553
00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:17,655
leaving the dock in 15 minutes.
554
00:24:17,747 --> 00:24:19,037
Irwin, here's the
coffee that you ordered.
555
00:24:19,124 --> 00:24:21,004
Oh, thank you.
556
00:24:21,084 --> 00:24:22,924
Uh, listen, there
is a very special lady
557
00:24:23,003 --> 00:24:24,253
that'd like to see you.
558
00:24:28,175 --> 00:24:31,505
[Music playing]
559
00:24:56,953 --> 00:24:57,663
Marge?
560
00:24:59,915 --> 00:25:00,615
Marge?
561
00:25:13,094 --> 00:25:16,854
[Music playing]
562
00:25:33,782 --> 00:25:36,622
Boy, mazatl n was sure
a lot of fun, wasn't it?
563
00:25:36,701 --> 00:25:37,541
Uh-huh.
564
00:25:37,619 --> 00:25:40,079
You know, I've been thinking.
565
00:25:40,163 --> 00:25:42,123
When you get back home, you
should try to sell your story
566
00:25:42,207 --> 00:25:42,787
to one of the magazines.
567
00:25:42,874 --> 00:25:44,924
Oh, no.
568
00:25:45,001 --> 00:25:50,091
I don't want to embarrass
the girl wherever she is.
569
00:25:50,173 --> 00:25:51,343
I'll get us some drinks.
570
00:25:51,424 --> 00:25:53,094
The first round's on me.
571
00:25:55,887 --> 00:25:58,307
[Chatter]
572
00:25:58,390 --> 00:25:59,180
Yeah.
573
00:25:59,266 --> 00:26:00,306
Uh, two margaritas, please.
574
00:26:00,392 --> 00:26:00,852
Sure, coming right up.
575
00:26:00,934 --> 00:26:02,694
Hi, guys.
576
00:26:02,769 --> 00:26:03,439
Hi.
577
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:04,650
Hey.
578
00:26:04,729 --> 00:26:05,399
What's with you?
579
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:06,230
You look terrible.
580
00:26:06,314 --> 00:26:08,194
Ah, I've been up
all night trying
581
00:26:08,275 --> 00:26:10,065
to catch the lady love bug.
582
00:26:10,151 --> 00:26:11,321
I don't know, doc.
583
00:26:11,403 --> 00:26:13,493
I gave her every chance
in the world, hung
584
00:26:13,571 --> 00:26:14,911
around all the dark corners.
585
00:26:14,990 --> 00:26:16,620
She never even laid
a finger on me.
586
00:26:16,700 --> 00:26:19,910
It makes you lose your
faith in human nature.
587
00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:21,745
You may be losing
your sleep over nothing.
588
00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:23,330
That's what I said.
589
00:26:23,415 --> 00:26:24,205
Oh, no, what do you mean?
590
00:26:24,291 --> 00:26:26,291
Well, things don't
just fit right.
591
00:26:26,376 --> 00:26:27,336
Doug's story doesn't
quite ring true.
592
00:26:27,419 --> 00:26:30,009
Yeah, but why
would he make it up?
593
00:26:30,088 --> 00:26:31,668
Who knows, maybe
a pathological
594
00:26:31,756 --> 00:26:33,166
need for attention.
595
00:26:33,258 --> 00:26:35,678
But my guess is it's a put-on.
596
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:37,390
It never really happened.
597
00:26:37,470 --> 00:26:39,970
No female on the prowl, huh?
598
00:26:40,056 --> 00:26:41,676
So much for equal rights.
599
00:26:41,766 --> 00:26:42,676
There you go.
600
00:26:42,767 --> 00:26:44,847
Forget it.
601
00:26:44,936 --> 00:26:48,016
[Music playing]
602
00:26:48,106 --> 00:26:49,266
Where are the margaritas?
603
00:26:49,357 --> 00:26:52,027
Get them yourself, you phony!
604
00:26:52,110 --> 00:26:56,280
[Music playing]
605
00:26:57,449 --> 00:26:58,119
[Door shuts]
606
00:26:58,199 --> 00:26:59,369
Marge: Hi, George.
607
00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:02,791
Hey, what kind of a greeting
is that for someone you're
608
00:27:02,871 --> 00:27:04,001
crazy about?
609
00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:05,460
[Laughing]
610
00:27:05,540 --> 00:27:08,170
What's the matter with you?
611
00:27:08,251 --> 00:27:10,301
We're going to
have to have a talk.
612
00:27:10,378 --> 00:27:14,338
All this time apart
and you want to talk?
613
00:27:14,424 --> 00:27:17,894
I think I'm in
love with irwin.
614
00:27:17,969 --> 00:27:18,719
Ir-- irwin?
615
00:27:18,803 --> 00:27:19,473
[Laughing]
616
00:27:19,554 --> 00:27:21,394
That loser?
617
00:27:21,473 --> 00:27:22,853
He is not a loser!
618
00:27:22,932 --> 00:27:24,062
He's honest and kind--
619
00:27:24,142 --> 00:27:26,312
and broke.
620
00:27:26,394 --> 00:27:27,274
What do you mean broke?
621
00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:29,064
The company just made
a big commission.
622
00:27:29,147 --> 00:27:31,607
George: And guess what?
623
00:27:31,691 --> 00:27:33,281
Last night, the
office was robbed.
624
00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:37,240
The dough's all gone.
625
00:27:37,322 --> 00:27:39,162
So that's what
this is all about.
626
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,950
You went back and
stole $200,000.
627
00:27:42,035 --> 00:27:43,945
I did not.
628
00:27:44,037 --> 00:27:45,537
Half of that money was mine.
629
00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:48,882
I only stole $100,000.
630
00:27:48,958 --> 00:27:50,418
I'm telling irwin.
631
00:27:50,502 --> 00:27:52,552
Ok, if you want
to go to prison.
632
00:27:52,629 --> 00:27:53,249
What do you mean?
633
00:27:53,338 --> 00:27:54,588
I didn't do anything.
634
00:27:54,672 --> 00:27:56,012
That's your story.
635
00:27:56,091 --> 00:27:58,431
You convinced irwin
that I was on board ship
636
00:27:58,510 --> 00:28:00,600
while that safe
was being robbed.
637
00:28:00,678 --> 00:28:03,218
That makes you an accomplice.
638
00:28:03,306 --> 00:28:05,766
Baby, you're as guilty as I am.
639
00:28:05,850 --> 00:28:07,600
[Music playing]
640
00:28:07,685 --> 00:28:08,595
Oh, come on.
641
00:28:08,686 --> 00:28:11,766
This thing with irwin,
it's just the moonlight.
642
00:28:11,856 --> 00:28:13,566
Besides, he's not
going to want to have
643
00:28:13,650 --> 00:28:16,400
anything to do with
you when he finds
644
00:28:16,486 --> 00:28:17,776
out you helped clean him out.
645
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:20,700
Come on.
646
00:28:20,782 --> 00:28:23,452
Forget the dummy.
647
00:28:23,535 --> 00:28:25,285
Stick with a winner.
648
00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:26,410
[Kissing]
649
00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:28,036
I guess I don't
have a choice, do I?
650
00:28:33,753 --> 00:28:35,463
Wh-- wh-- what are you doing?
651
00:28:35,547 --> 00:28:38,087
Well, I won this with irwin.
652
00:28:38,174 --> 00:28:39,634
Since I have to get rid
of him, I might as well
653
00:28:39,717 --> 00:28:40,387
get rid of the doll, too.
654
00:28:40,468 --> 00:28:43,178
Uh-- uh, leave it.
655
00:28:43,263 --> 00:28:45,473
You know, I kind of like it.
656
00:28:45,557 --> 00:28:46,717
I'll keep it.
657
00:28:46,808 --> 00:28:49,638
I'm going down to the ship store
and get a brand-new tuxedo.
658
00:28:49,727 --> 00:28:53,517
We've got a lot of
celebrating to do tonight.
659
00:28:53,606 --> 00:28:55,686
[Growls]
660
00:28:55,775 --> 00:28:58,065
[Music playing]
661
00:28:59,904 --> 00:29:01,494
Gopher (over loudspeaker):
Attention, please.
662
00:29:01,573 --> 00:29:04,953
We will depart
mazatl n in 20 minutes.
663
00:29:05,034 --> 00:29:07,454
Quick, guys, get something
long and cold for the lady.
664
00:29:07,537 --> 00:29:09,077
Oh, forget the long and cold.
665
00:29:09,164 --> 00:29:10,834
Just bring me two new feet.
666
00:29:10,915 --> 00:29:13,455
We must have walked to
the border and back.
667
00:29:13,543 --> 00:29:14,883
The regular for me, please.
668
00:29:14,961 --> 00:29:15,711
Right.
669
00:29:15,795 --> 00:29:17,165
One iced coffee
and two new feet.
670
00:29:17,255 --> 00:29:18,375
[Laughing]
671
00:29:18,465 --> 00:29:19,625
Listen, captain, you've
got more cablegrams.
672
00:29:19,716 --> 00:29:20,876
Uh, congratulations, I suppose.
673
00:29:20,967 --> 00:29:22,507
Uh, well, listen, will
you open them, and leave
674
00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:24,854
them on my desk for me, please?
675
00:29:24,929 --> 00:29:26,679
Certainly.
676
00:29:26,764 --> 00:29:27,474
Hey, doc.
677
00:29:27,557 --> 00:29:28,347
Hm?
678
00:29:28,433 --> 00:29:30,103
You know the
captain and the lady?
679
00:29:30,185 --> 00:29:32,805
She's, uh, really
doing great today.
680
00:29:32,896 --> 00:29:33,226
That is, from the ankles up.
681
00:29:33,313 --> 00:29:34,863
[Laughing]
682
00:29:34,939 --> 00:29:36,319
I'm glad to hear it.
683
00:29:36,399 --> 00:29:37,319
Yeah.
684
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:38,110
Well.
685
00:29:40,945 --> 00:29:43,195
Oh, no.
686
00:29:43,281 --> 00:29:44,871
What is it?
687
00:29:44,949 --> 00:29:47,699
Doc, you know I'm not
the kind of person to read
688
00:29:47,785 --> 00:29:49,285
other people's messages, right?
689
00:29:49,370 --> 00:29:50,540
But I just couldn't help myself.
690
00:29:50,622 --> 00:29:53,172
I mean, this word just jumped
right off the page at me.
691
00:29:53,249 --> 00:29:55,039
What word?
692
00:29:55,126 --> 00:29:56,286
It's in a message to her.
693
00:29:56,377 --> 00:29:59,417
It must've got mixed in with
the captain's by mistake.
694
00:29:59,506 --> 00:30:02,086
I don't want to see it.
695
00:30:02,175 --> 00:30:03,585
Doc.
696
00:30:03,676 --> 00:30:07,386
Well, one little
word won't hurt.
697
00:30:07,472 --> 00:30:09,222
Husband.
698
00:30:09,307 --> 00:30:11,477
It hurts.
699
00:30:11,559 --> 00:30:14,479
(Whispering) She's married.
700
00:30:14,562 --> 00:30:16,402
[Laughing]
701
00:30:16,481 --> 00:30:21,401
But the question
is, do we tell him?
702
00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:24,446
[Music playing]
703
00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:33,040
Marge!
704
00:30:39,462 --> 00:30:41,012
Marge?
705
00:30:41,089 --> 00:30:43,049
[Knocking]
706
00:30:48,012 --> 00:30:50,012
[Music playing]
707
00:30:58,398 --> 00:30:59,358
Hi, Doug.
708
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:01,940
Hi, Dorothy.
709
00:31:02,026 --> 00:31:04,316
I spoke to Pam.
710
00:31:04,404 --> 00:31:09,334
Yeah, I guess I really blew
it with her this time, didn't I?
711
00:31:09,409 --> 00:31:11,079
What really made
her mad is that she
712
00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:12,040
fell for your little trick.
713
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:16,830
You, uh, made her take
a look at herself.
714
00:31:16,916 --> 00:31:20,626
And I don't think she
likes what she saw.
715
00:31:20,712 --> 00:31:24,802
Yeah, now I'll probably
never get another chance.
716
00:31:24,882 --> 00:31:28,262
Are you sure you really
want another chance?
717
00:31:28,344 --> 00:31:31,184
Dorothy, of course I do!
718
00:31:31,264 --> 00:31:32,774
You know the way
I feel about Pam.
719
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:37,900
All right, buster.
720
00:31:37,979 --> 00:31:39,399
I'll get you your chance.
721
00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:42,650
You will?
722
00:31:42,734 --> 00:31:46,154
Hey, Dorothy,
that-- that's great.
723
00:31:46,237 --> 00:31:48,447
You don't know how
much this means to me.
724
00:31:48,531 --> 00:31:49,451
Thank you.
725
00:31:49,532 --> 00:31:51,032
Forget it!
726
00:31:51,117 --> 00:31:53,947
I'm beginning to think you
two deserve each other.
727
00:31:57,206 --> 00:31:58,996
Irwin?
728
00:31:59,083 --> 00:32:00,343
Oh, George.
729
00:32:00,418 --> 00:32:01,338
Feeling better?
730
00:32:01,419 --> 00:32:02,299
Where is she?
731
00:32:02,378 --> 00:32:03,418
Did she come running to you?
732
00:32:03,504 --> 00:32:03,964
Who?
733
00:32:04,047 --> 00:32:05,547
Marge, you dummy!
734
00:32:05,632 --> 00:32:06,092
Where is she?
735
00:32:06,174 --> 00:32:08,384
Have you seen her?
736
00:32:08,468 --> 00:32:11,138
No, not since we
docked at mazatl n.
737
00:32:11,220 --> 00:32:13,640
What a stupid broad.
738
00:32:13,723 --> 00:32:15,933
George, you can't talk
about Marge like that.
739
00:32:16,017 --> 00:32:17,847
Oh, shut up, you meat head!
740
00:32:17,935 --> 00:32:20,515
You're a perfect match.
741
00:32:20,605 --> 00:32:22,265
When she told me she
was in love with you,
742
00:32:22,357 --> 00:32:26,777
I should have tossed her
tail out of the cabin myself.
743
00:32:26,861 --> 00:32:29,611
She's-- Marge--
744
00:32:29,697 --> 00:32:32,617
you make me sick.
745
00:32:32,700 --> 00:32:36,040
You've been making
me sick for 10 years.
746
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:37,160
At least that's over!
747
00:32:41,668 --> 00:32:42,628
She loves me.
748
00:32:42,710 --> 00:32:43,380
[Scoffs]
749
00:32:43,461 --> 00:32:48,971
She told me that she loves me.
750
00:32:49,050 --> 00:32:50,470
If she loves me,
why did she leave?
751
00:32:55,598 --> 00:32:59,728
[Music playing]
752
00:32:59,811 --> 00:33:01,981
Pam, I've been
waiting for you.
753
00:33:02,063 --> 00:33:03,113
Bug off, Charlie.
754
00:33:03,189 --> 00:33:04,569
Didn't Dorothy talk to you?
755
00:33:04,649 --> 00:33:05,729
Gopher: Hey, hey!
756
00:33:05,817 --> 00:33:06,977
Great news!
757
00:33:07,068 --> 00:33:08,398
We caught the lady love bandit,
the one who attacked you.
758
00:33:08,486 --> 00:33:10,406
You caught her?
759
00:33:10,488 --> 00:33:11,778
Well, not exactly.
760
00:33:11,864 --> 00:33:14,414
Um, she came in and
confessed-- same thing.
761
00:33:14,492 --> 00:33:16,662
Kind of makes a guy believe
in Santa claus again.
762
00:33:16,744 --> 00:33:17,584
Listen.
763
00:33:17,662 --> 00:33:18,582
She's up in the
captain's office now.
764
00:33:18,663 --> 00:33:20,373
I thought you might like
to go up, and see what
765
00:33:20,456 --> 00:33:23,416
she looks like in the light.
766
00:33:23,501 --> 00:33:26,381
So it did happen.
767
00:33:26,462 --> 00:33:29,092
I apologize, Doug.
768
00:33:29,173 --> 00:33:30,303
You go ahead.
769
00:33:30,383 --> 00:33:33,013
And when you finish, I'll be
waiting for you in the bar.
770
00:33:36,097 --> 00:33:40,437
Uh, Doug, we've
got to-- come on.
771
00:33:40,518 --> 00:33:42,018
[Music playing]
772
00:33:44,689 --> 00:33:45,609
Ok.
773
00:33:45,690 --> 00:33:46,650
Now be prepared to
defend yourself.
774
00:33:46,733 --> 00:33:51,783
Remember, she finds you
totally irresistible.
775
00:33:51,863 --> 00:33:53,743
Dorothy?
776
00:33:53,823 --> 00:33:55,123
You know her?
777
00:33:55,199 --> 00:33:55,949
I'm sorry, Doug.
778
00:33:56,033 --> 00:33:57,163
I tried.
779
00:33:57,243 --> 00:33:59,293
But I couldn't help myself.
780
00:33:59,370 --> 00:34:01,290
I lost all control.
781
00:34:01,372 --> 00:34:02,922
The animal took over.
782
00:34:02,999 --> 00:34:03,749
What?
783
00:34:03,833 --> 00:34:05,083
She says she's
sorry she tried--
784
00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:08,298
I heard what she said.
785
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:09,669
Dorothy, why did you do this?
786
00:34:09,756 --> 00:34:12,376
I can't talk about it.
787
00:34:12,467 --> 00:34:15,467
It's, uh--
788
00:34:15,553 --> 00:34:16,223
Dorothy.
789
00:34:19,766 --> 00:34:21,976
Would you stop all this, and
tell me what you're doing?
790
00:34:22,059 --> 00:34:23,769
Look, you wanted
another chance with Pam.
791
00:34:23,853 --> 00:34:25,773
You got another chance.
792
00:34:25,855 --> 00:34:27,975
And it serves you right!
793
00:34:28,065 --> 00:34:30,855
You actually went and
told the captain that you--
794
00:34:30,943 --> 00:34:32,903
that must have been humiliating.
795
00:34:32,987 --> 00:34:34,447
Mm, not too bad.
796
00:34:34,530 --> 00:34:35,950
And they're not going
to do anything about it.
797
00:34:36,032 --> 00:34:38,492
They just think i'm
some kind of kook.
798
00:34:38,576 --> 00:34:40,366
Dorothy.
799
00:34:40,453 --> 00:34:42,413
Look.
800
00:34:42,497 --> 00:34:44,497
Aren't you wasting
your time here?
801
00:34:44,582 --> 00:34:46,672
You got the killer
reputation you wanted--
802
00:34:46,751 --> 00:34:47,501
go knock her dead.
803
00:34:47,585 --> 00:34:50,415
[Music playing]
804
00:34:51,589 --> 00:34:54,799
[Knocking]
805
00:34:56,344 --> 00:34:57,144
Doc.
806
00:34:57,220 --> 00:34:59,510
Linda, uh, may I come in?
807
00:34:59,597 --> 00:35:00,517
Oh, yeah, sure.
808
00:35:00,598 --> 00:35:03,848
Thank you.
809
00:35:03,935 --> 00:35:06,305
What's wrong?
810
00:35:06,395 --> 00:35:07,265
Is it the captain?
811
00:35:07,355 --> 00:35:09,685
No, no, he's fine--
812
00:35:09,774 --> 00:35:11,694
or maybe he isn't.
813
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:13,686
What do you mean?
814
00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:17,108
Well, a message
came for you, and, uh,
815
00:35:17,198 --> 00:35:18,568
Isaac opened it accidentally.
816
00:35:18,658 --> 00:35:19,658
Now please believe me.
817
00:35:19,742 --> 00:35:21,452
It was totally by mistake.
818
00:35:21,536 --> 00:35:23,446
It was with some other
things that the captain
819
00:35:23,538 --> 00:35:25,408
asked him to open.
820
00:35:25,498 --> 00:35:26,498
Um--
821
00:35:26,582 --> 00:35:29,542
go on.
822
00:35:29,627 --> 00:35:32,587
Well, I don't know
quite how to say this.
823
00:35:32,672 --> 00:35:35,422
Then let me say it for you.
824
00:35:35,508 --> 00:35:37,588
It probably mentioned
a husband, didn't it?
825
00:35:43,683 --> 00:35:46,443
I have no wish to pry.
826
00:35:49,981 --> 00:35:53,321
Well, then why did you?
827
00:35:53,401 --> 00:35:56,321
It's because you're shocked
thinking a married woman is
828
00:35:56,404 --> 00:35:59,124
having an affair.
829
00:35:59,198 --> 00:36:00,318
If it was a married
man, you'd be
830
00:36:00,408 --> 00:36:03,038
laughing and buying him drinks.
831
00:36:03,119 --> 00:36:05,079
We think an awful
lot of the captain.
832
00:36:05,163 --> 00:36:08,503
And don't want to
see him get hurt.
833
00:36:08,583 --> 00:36:09,883
Why are you all so protective?
834
00:36:09,959 --> 00:36:11,629
Why shouldn't he get hurt?
835
00:36:11,711 --> 00:36:14,091
Why should he be immune?
836
00:36:14,172 --> 00:36:17,342
What is he, some tin
god in a sailor suit?
837
00:36:17,425 --> 00:36:20,425
Can't he take his chances
in the deep end of the pool
838
00:36:20,511 --> 00:36:21,851
like the rest of us?
839
00:36:21,929 --> 00:36:23,259
Now, I only wanted to--
840
00:36:23,347 --> 00:36:26,347
oh, to you, I suppose,
only a vestal virgin would
841
00:36:26,434 --> 00:36:28,354
be good enough for his majesty.
842
00:36:28,436 --> 00:36:30,186
Linda, it wasn't
easy coming here.
843
00:36:30,271 --> 00:36:31,981
Linda: Oh, but you
sure did, didn't you?
844
00:36:32,064 --> 00:36:35,234
Because you wanted
to hear it from me.
845
00:36:35,318 --> 00:36:37,948
Well, it's not exactly
what you think.
846
00:36:38,029 --> 00:36:40,949
[Gasps]
847
00:36:41,949 --> 00:36:44,449
[Sighs]
848
00:36:44,535 --> 00:36:47,195
[Music playing]
849
00:36:48,873 --> 00:36:49,503
[Knocking]
850
00:36:49,582 --> 00:36:52,792
Captain: Linda, are you ready?
851
00:36:52,877 --> 00:36:58,167
Here he is, the man
I'm hurting so terribly.
852
00:36:58,257 --> 00:37:02,797
Well, tell him if it will
make you feel any better.
853
00:37:02,887 --> 00:37:03,797
Go on.
854
00:37:03,888 --> 00:37:04,758
Tell him!
855
00:37:04,847 --> 00:37:05,677
Sorry, I'm late.
856
00:37:09,894 --> 00:37:11,564
What is this?
857
00:37:21,030 --> 00:37:22,700
The latest news.
858
00:37:22,782 --> 00:37:26,332
Here, read all about it.
859
00:37:26,410 --> 00:37:29,330
[Slams door]
860
00:37:29,413 --> 00:37:31,333
[Music playing]
861
00:37:40,174 --> 00:37:42,394
Don't tell me
you blew it again.
862
00:37:42,468 --> 00:37:42,508
Well, I hope not.
863
00:37:45,930 --> 00:37:47,680
So do I. I'd
hate to waste that
864
00:37:47,765 --> 00:37:50,345
four-star performance I gave
him in the captain's office.
865
00:37:50,434 --> 00:37:52,234
Well, I'm afraid
it was wasted.
866
00:37:52,311 --> 00:37:54,271
I already went back and
explained to him exactly
867
00:37:54,355 --> 00:37:56,015
what happened in that closet--
868
00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:57,067
nothing.
869
00:37:57,149 --> 00:38:00,149
And I also told him what
you had to do with it,
870
00:38:00,236 --> 00:38:02,816
which was also nothing.
871
00:38:02,905 --> 00:38:04,815
I'm beginning to
wonder what's going on in
872
00:38:04,907 --> 00:38:05,907
that tiny little head of yours.
873
00:38:05,992 --> 00:38:07,582
Well, isn't it obvious?
874
00:38:12,707 --> 00:38:15,787
Look, i-- I started
all this trying
875
00:38:15,876 --> 00:38:16,496
to be the irresistible man.
876
00:38:19,338 --> 00:38:23,928
And instead, I
ended up discovering
877
00:38:24,010 --> 00:38:26,300
the irresistible woman.
878
00:38:28,389 --> 00:38:30,849
You know, Dorothy, it may
not be big enough news
879
00:38:30,933 --> 00:38:31,853
to make the papers.
880
00:38:31,934 --> 00:38:36,984
But the fact is, i--
881
00:38:37,064 --> 00:38:38,574
I've found that
it's you that I care
882
00:38:38,649 --> 00:38:46,199
for very much with all
my heart and with all
883
00:38:46,282 --> 00:38:48,122
my tiny little head.
884
00:38:50,995 --> 00:38:52,075
Wow.
885
00:38:52,163 --> 00:38:55,253
Is that all you're
going to say, wow?
886
00:38:55,332 --> 00:38:58,212
I think so.
887
00:38:58,294 --> 00:38:59,254
Except for this.
888
00:39:08,012 --> 00:39:12,022
Hey, I have a great idea.
889
00:39:12,099 --> 00:39:13,599
Let's go back to the closet.
890
00:39:13,684 --> 00:39:14,604
[Laughing]
891
00:39:14,685 --> 00:39:16,845
Only this time, let's
not tell the captain.
892
00:39:16,937 --> 00:39:19,647
He's confused enough already.
893
00:39:19,732 --> 00:39:22,442
[Music playing]
894
00:39:32,161 --> 00:39:35,751
Marge: Don't turn on the lights.
895
00:39:35,831 --> 00:39:36,871
Margie?
896
00:39:36,957 --> 00:39:38,207
Marge: I have
something to tell you.
897
00:39:38,292 --> 00:39:40,632
And I don't want to see
your face when I do.
898
00:39:40,711 --> 00:39:42,341
I have something
to tell you, too.
899
00:39:42,421 --> 00:39:44,971
And I want to see
your face when I do.
900
00:39:50,721 --> 00:39:50,761
I love you, Margie.
901
00:39:55,309 --> 00:40:00,269
I told George about it
last night on the phone.
902
00:40:00,356 --> 00:40:01,566
Now I'm telling you.
903
00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:02,819
Irwin, don't.
904
00:40:02,900 --> 00:40:03,480
It doesn't matter.
905
00:40:06,487 --> 00:40:09,317
Because I know you love me, too.
906
00:40:09,406 --> 00:40:10,776
George told me.
907
00:40:10,866 --> 00:40:14,196
But he thought you left
the boat at mazatl n.
908
00:40:14,286 --> 00:40:15,406
Well, I was going to.
909
00:40:15,496 --> 00:40:18,996
But I had to see
you and tell you.
910
00:40:19,083 --> 00:40:20,463
You're going to hate me.
911
00:40:20,543 --> 00:40:20,883
[Scoffs]
912
00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:24,460
What is it?
913
00:40:24,547 --> 00:40:25,707
Irwin, you don't have a dime.
914
00:40:29,051 --> 00:40:32,681
George robbed the office safe.
915
00:40:32,763 --> 00:40:34,723
Well, he couldn't
if he was here.
916
00:40:34,807 --> 00:40:37,017
No, only I was here, except
I was supposed to convince
917
00:40:37,101 --> 00:40:39,521
you that he was, too.
918
00:40:39,603 --> 00:40:42,063
Well, he told me he
had to leave the ship
919
00:40:42,148 --> 00:40:43,568
to talk to some tax man.
920
00:40:43,649 --> 00:40:48,069
But instead, he-- and
I'm an accomplice.
921
00:40:48,154 --> 00:40:49,534
Easy.
922
00:40:49,613 --> 00:40:51,373
Easy.
923
00:40:51,448 --> 00:40:52,528
You didn't know.
924
00:40:52,616 --> 00:40:53,866
He won't get away with it.
925
00:40:53,951 --> 00:40:55,121
I'm going to tell the
police everything,
926
00:40:55,202 --> 00:40:56,542
so you can get your money back.
927
00:40:56,620 --> 00:40:58,580
Forget about the money.
928
00:40:58,664 --> 00:41:00,424
But it's $100,000!
929
00:41:00,499 --> 00:41:04,209
I don't care if it's
a billion zillion.
930
00:41:04,295 --> 00:41:07,205
If having you with me means
being broke and starting
931
00:41:07,298 --> 00:41:10,218
all over again, so be it.
932
00:41:10,301 --> 00:41:14,011
Let George have the dough.
933
00:41:14,096 --> 00:41:14,846
I don't regret a penny.
934
00:41:21,604 --> 00:41:26,324
Why'd it take me so long
to fall in love with you?
935
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:29,320
[Music playing]
936
00:41:42,124 --> 00:41:43,634
[Knocking]
937
00:41:46,503 --> 00:41:48,513
Merrill, may I see
you for a minute?
938
00:41:55,638 --> 00:41:56,718
There's really no point.
939
00:41:56,805 --> 00:41:57,505
Please.
940
00:42:12,947 --> 00:42:15,617
I'm sorry I made such
a scene with the doc.
941
00:42:15,699 --> 00:42:18,369
But these last couple of weeks,
I've been under such a strain.
942
00:42:18,452 --> 00:42:19,792
I guess something had to pop.
943
00:42:19,870 --> 00:42:22,250
Is it true you
do have a husband?
944
00:42:22,331 --> 00:42:27,961
An ex-husband, an ex-husband.
945
00:42:28,045 --> 00:42:29,505
I started to explain to doc.
946
00:42:29,588 --> 00:42:31,798
But there really
wasn't any point.
947
00:42:31,882 --> 00:42:34,802
Because merrill, in effect,
I am committed to him.
948
00:42:34,885 --> 00:42:35,885
I don't understand.
949
00:42:35,970 --> 00:42:40,060
About a month
ago, he came back.
950
00:42:40,140 --> 00:42:45,400
He's very sick, an alcoholic.
951
00:42:45,479 --> 00:42:47,819
He's fighting it desperately.
952
00:42:47,898 --> 00:42:51,648
Well, you can understand that.
953
00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:55,405
An old enemy I well remember.
954
00:42:55,489 --> 00:42:57,829
Oh, I couldn't refuse him.
955
00:42:57,908 --> 00:43:03,458
He had no place else to
go, nobody else to turn to.
956
00:43:03,539 --> 00:43:07,499
And we had been
married for 12 years.
957
00:43:07,585 --> 00:43:09,875
I mean, some of those years
were pretty good ones.
958
00:43:09,962 --> 00:43:13,632
But what about our good years,
the ones I want to give to you?
959
00:43:13,716 --> 00:43:17,676
Oh, please don't try to
make me change my mind,
960
00:43:17,761 --> 00:43:20,061
because you can.
961
00:43:20,139 --> 00:43:23,479
But I wouldn't like
myself much if I did.
962
00:43:23,559 --> 00:43:24,519
[Sighs]
963
00:43:24,601 --> 00:43:26,601
I was going to tell you
all this before I left.
964
00:43:26,687 --> 00:43:27,807
Will you please believe that?
965
00:43:27,896 --> 00:43:28,936
I do.
966
00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:30,863
I do.
967
00:43:30,941 --> 00:43:32,691
But I just--
968
00:43:32,776 --> 00:43:35,696
I wanted to desperately
to be with you.
969
00:43:35,779 --> 00:43:37,529
I really needed you.
970
00:43:37,614 --> 00:43:39,744
(Crying) And I wanted to--
971
00:43:39,825 --> 00:43:43,865
I wanted this one last
moment in time to together.
972
00:43:43,954 --> 00:43:51,384
And I know that's so
selfish, because i--
973
00:43:51,462 --> 00:43:58,392
I didn't realize that you needed
a deeper commitment, marriage.
974
00:43:58,469 --> 00:44:02,849
I-- I mean, if that's what
you have to have, then--
975
00:44:02,931 --> 00:44:05,981
then we don't have anything.
976
00:44:06,060 --> 00:44:11,070
Linda, maybe, in time,
you'll change your mind.
977
00:44:11,148 --> 00:44:13,398
It's a no-win situation
for the two of us.
978
00:44:13,484 --> 00:44:15,574
Don't you see that?
979
00:44:15,652 --> 00:44:19,242
You know, before he
came back, I hoped to be
980
00:44:19,323 --> 00:44:23,793
the captain's lady for life.
981
00:44:23,869 --> 00:44:28,539
But now I can only be his
love for-- for an evening.
982
00:44:31,710 --> 00:44:33,000
So it's up to you.
983
00:44:35,964 --> 00:44:41,604
It's not everything,
but it's all I have.
984
00:44:41,678 --> 00:44:44,638
[Music playing]
985
00:44:50,687 --> 00:44:53,977
Oh, I know you have to check
with the bridge, right?
986
00:44:54,066 --> 00:44:57,486
Well, couldn't you
call from my cabin?
987
00:44:57,569 --> 00:44:58,359
Linda.
988
00:44:58,445 --> 00:44:59,275
What?
989
00:44:59,363 --> 00:45:03,743
First, indulge me.
990
00:45:03,826 --> 00:45:06,946
I've been practicing
this question so long,
991
00:45:07,037 --> 00:45:10,747
I just have to ask it.
992
00:45:10,833 --> 00:45:12,043
I love you.
993
00:45:16,046 --> 00:45:16,916
Will you marry me?
994
00:45:20,551 --> 00:45:23,971
No, I won't.
995
00:45:24,054 --> 00:45:26,064
But I love you, too.
996
00:45:31,603 --> 00:45:34,523
[Music playing]
997
00:45:54,209 --> 00:45:55,749
George!
998
00:45:55,836 --> 00:45:57,246
George?
999
00:45:57,337 --> 00:45:58,917
Oh, you're still on board.
1000
00:45:59,006 --> 00:45:59,586
Ha ha.
1001
00:45:59,673 --> 00:46:00,843
Couldn't give me up, huh?
1002
00:46:00,924 --> 00:46:01,634
I'm with irwin.
1003
00:46:01,717 --> 00:46:03,637
I told him everything.
1004
00:46:03,719 --> 00:46:04,509
Irwin: Relax, George.
1005
00:46:04,595 --> 00:46:05,465
You can keep the
money wherever it is.
1006
00:46:05,554 --> 00:46:08,274
I came out better anyway.
1007
00:46:08,348 --> 00:46:10,058
Oh, yeah, well, good luck.
1008
00:46:10,142 --> 00:46:13,692
But I have decided to keep
the doll for sentimental reasons
1009
00:46:13,770 --> 00:46:15,610
since we won it together.
1010
00:46:15,689 --> 00:46:17,189
We thought we'd take
the stuffing out of it
1011
00:46:17,274 --> 00:46:18,364
and make it into a lamp.
1012
00:46:18,442 --> 00:46:20,742
St-- stuffing?
1013
00:46:20,819 --> 00:46:21,569
Bye bye, George.
1014
00:46:25,282 --> 00:46:29,042
Mr. Boggs, did you
enjoy your cruise?
1015
00:46:29,119 --> 00:46:30,659
If you weren't a dame, i'd--
1016
00:46:30,746 --> 00:46:33,536
I'd punch you in the mouth.
1017
00:46:33,624 --> 00:46:35,634
Stuffing?
1018
00:46:35,709 --> 00:46:40,709
$100,000.
1019
00:46:40,797 --> 00:46:42,717
I don't know what
you see in that guy.
1020
00:46:42,799 --> 00:46:44,219
He's a perfect flake.
1021
00:46:44,301 --> 00:46:46,181
Oh, I wouldn't say perfect.
1022
00:46:46,261 --> 00:46:48,971
But he does have possibilities.
1023
00:46:49,056 --> 00:46:50,926
Gopher: Well, Doug, I
hope you come cruising
1024
00:46:51,016 --> 00:46:51,726
again with us real soon.
1025
00:46:51,808 --> 00:46:52,768
Thank you.
1026
00:46:52,851 --> 00:46:54,851
And next time, try to
stay out of the closet.
1027
00:46:54,937 --> 00:46:55,727
[Laughing]
1028
00:46:55,812 --> 00:46:56,522
Bye bye.
1029
00:46:56,605 --> 00:46:57,265
Bye bye.
1030
00:46:57,356 --> 00:46:58,516
Bye.
1031
00:46:58,607 --> 00:47:01,187
I'm certainly glad there
isn't any truth to that story.
1032
00:47:01,276 --> 00:47:03,776
What kind of a world would
it be with aggressive women
1033
00:47:03,862 --> 00:47:05,532
going around grabbing men?
1034
00:47:05,614 --> 00:47:06,954
It would be terrible, doc.
1035
00:47:07,032 --> 00:47:07,072
It would be just terrible.
1036
00:47:12,329 --> 00:47:15,579
You'll say my goodbyes to the
others, will you, and to Vicki?
1037
00:47:15,666 --> 00:47:16,206
[Sighs]
1038
00:47:16,291 --> 00:47:18,091
I'm going to miss her.
1039
00:47:18,168 --> 00:47:24,798
I still hope you'll come
back maybe in a few months.
1040
00:47:24,883 --> 00:47:25,633
It is possible.
1041
00:47:27,511 --> 00:47:30,681
You know how I feel about you.
1042
00:47:30,764 --> 00:47:31,854
It wouldn't be fair.
1043
00:47:36,228 --> 00:47:37,898
I gotta get out
of here right now.
1044
00:47:37,980 --> 00:47:38,690
Linda.
1045
00:47:42,067 --> 00:47:46,987
You're a very
[Sighs] wise woman.
1046
00:47:47,072 --> 00:47:49,532
One thing you're
dead wrong about--
1047
00:47:49,616 --> 00:47:51,116
you said you could never
be the captain's lady.
1048
00:47:53,787 --> 00:47:57,457
But that's how I'll
always remember you.
1049
00:47:57,541 --> 00:47:58,251
Oh, merrill.
1050
00:48:09,469 --> 00:48:12,929
[Music playing]
1051
00:48:12,979 --> 00:48:17,529
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