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Love,
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exciting and new
3
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come aboard,
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we're expecting you.
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Love,
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life's sweetest reward.
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Let it flow,
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it floats back to you.
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Love boat
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soon will be making another run.
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The love boat
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promises something for everyone.
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Set a course for adventure,
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00:01:01,436 --> 00:01:07,976
your mind on a new romance.
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Love
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won't hurt anymore.
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It's an open smile
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on a friendly shore.
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Yes, love
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welcome aboard,
21
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it's love.
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Somehow, eighty-six degrees,
23
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bright sunshine and a smog alert
24
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don't say Christmas to me.
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What's missing is snow.
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Of course it's missing.
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It's eighty six-degrees.
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Oh, I sure wish I was up
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in Oregon with my folks.
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You know, this is the first
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Christmas I've ever spent
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without my family.
33
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How do you think I feel?
34
00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:03,084
I never spent Christmas with
35
00:02:03,164 --> 00:02:05,084
your family.
36
00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:05,706
But, I know what you mean,
37
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Julie.
38
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:08,795
I mean, Christmas time should be
39
00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:09,878
family time.
40
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:12,553
I would've been in Las Vegas.
41
00:02:12,632 --> 00:02:13,632
Nothing more traditional than
42
00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:15,586
Christmas at a crap table.
43
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:17,387
But it is traditional.
44
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Every year my ex-wives get
45
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together and treat me to a big
46
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Turkey dinner.
47
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Sort of their way of saying
48
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thanks.
49
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,687
We always spend Christmas
50
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at my uncle delmer's farm.
51
00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:28,944
We arrive at nine o'clock on
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Christmas morning and by ten
53
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we're sitting down to a big
54
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pancake breakfast and syrup.
55
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At eleven o'clock we open the
56
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Christmas presents, and then at
57
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one-thirty we all go out for a
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walk.
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00:02:38,449 --> 00:02:39,079
By two-thirty everybody's ready
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for a nap.
61
00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,365
Sounds like fun.
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00:02:42,453 --> 00:02:43,413
Good morning.
63
00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:45,206
Oh, good morning, sir.
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Well, we nap for about an hour
or so,
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and then at three-thirty, Bob,
66
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that's my brother,
67
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he takes the kids to
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visit the neighbors.
69
00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:52,552
Then at six-fifteen, my aunt
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Lillian brings out a big
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Christmas goose and we eat
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ourselves right into oblivion.
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Then at eight, we drag ourselves
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00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:02,716
away from the table and...
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00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:03,727
Go to bed?
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00:03:03,808 --> 00:03:04,638
No, then we go caroling
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door to door.
78
00:03:05,226 --> 00:03:06,476
Then you go to bed.
79
00:03:06,561 --> 00:03:08,771
No, then we burn the tradi..
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00:03:08,855 --> 00:03:10,765
You see, sir, we're all feeling
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00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:11,567
a little homesick about
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00:03:11,649 --> 00:03:13,229
having to spend Christmas
aboard.
83
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:14,568
Really?
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I've never done anything else.
85
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:17,782
Oh, but, sir, wouldn't you
86
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:18,624
rather spend Christmas with
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00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:20,328
your family than at sea?
88
00:03:20,408 --> 00:03:21,988
Miss McCoy, as you know,
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00:03:22,076 --> 00:03:23,116
I'm divorced.
90
00:03:23,202 --> 00:03:25,122
My family consists of my father
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00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:26,794
and his new wife, and they live
92
00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:27,923
in Florida.
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00:03:27,999 --> 00:03:30,079
So, as far as I'm concerned --
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Christmas is just another
95
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working day.
96
00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:36,629
-- And speaking of work...
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00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:37,676
All: Right.
98
00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:38,799
Yes, sir.
99
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:39,885
Sure.
100
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:40,969
Right.
101
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:44,524
Sir -- I know that we
102
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:45,519
don't normally exchange
103
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,980
presents, but I was thinking
104
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,310
that seeing as how we're gonna
105
00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:50,154
be at sea on Christmas day...
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00:03:50,229 --> 00:03:51,809
Mr. Smith,
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00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,938
a rule is a rule.
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00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:55,935
No presents.
109
00:03:56,027 --> 00:03:58,947
Aye-aye, sir.
110
00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:00,910
-- Scrooge lives.
111
00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:09,955
Good morning,ladies and
gentlemen
112
00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:12,001
and welcome to our annual
three-day
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00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,535
Christmas voyage to Ensenada.
114
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:18,838
Bon voyage and merry Christmas!
115
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:22,258
Hello.
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00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:26,135
Welcome aboard.
117
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:27,184
Hey, Julie.
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00:04:27,266 --> 00:04:28,636
Look at those two.
119
00:04:28,726 --> 00:04:29,596
Five bucks says they're not
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00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:30,686
married.
121
00:04:30,770 --> 00:04:31,150
Oh, no way.
122
00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:32,189
They're newlyweds.
123
00:04:32,271 --> 00:04:33,271
Oh please.
124
00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:34,066
They're lovers.
125
00:04:34,148 --> 00:04:35,068
Bet?
126
00:04:35,149 --> 00:04:36,189
Bet.
127
00:04:36,275 --> 00:04:38,695
Oh, darling, this is wonderful.
128
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,568
I'm so glad you brought me on
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00:04:40,655 --> 00:04:41,695
this cruise.
130
00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,701
I'm glad I brought you,too.
131
00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:44,413
(In his mind)If I didn't bring
you,
132
00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:47,752
i would have to kiss you
goodbye.
133
00:04:47,829 --> 00:04:49,369
It'll be fun.
134
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,535
Just the two of us at sea.
135
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:53,544
Oh, yes it will.
136
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:54,536
Audrey's voice: I'd rather be in
137
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:59,297
a swamp with idi amin.
138
00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:00,382
Newlyweds.
139
00:05:00,466 --> 00:05:01,426
Lovers.
140
00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:02,389
Five big ones.
141
00:05:02,468 --> 00:05:05,218
Hi.
142
00:05:05,304 --> 00:05:06,684
We're mr.And Mrs. Baynes.
143
00:05:06,764 --> 00:05:07,724
Well, hi, how are you? Hi.
144
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:09,517
The check's in the mail.
145
00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:10,850
Welcome aboard.
146
00:05:10,935 --> 00:05:11,725
This is assistant purser Smith
147
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:13,231
and I'm Julie McCoy, your cruise
148
00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:13,902
director.
149
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:14,520
How do you do? Welcome aboard.
150
00:05:14,605 --> 00:05:14,975
I'm sure you'll enjoy our
151
00:05:15,064 --> 00:05:16,734
Christmas cruise.
152
00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:18,186
Paul's voice: A Christmas cruise
153
00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:19,436
with her.
154
00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:21,237
(Sings) 'Tis the season to be
155
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:22,570
seasick.'
156
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:22,985
Audrey's voice: And after
157
00:05:23,072 --> 00:05:24,032
Christmas what?
158
00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:25,615
New year's Eve.
159
00:05:25,700 --> 00:05:26,740
Oh my god!
160
00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:27,906
I'm gonna have to kiss him
161
00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,624
again.
162
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:33,713
And we hope you both
163
00:05:33,791 --> 00:05:35,081
have a wonderful time.
164
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:35,538
Huh?
165
00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:35,876
What?
166
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:36,960
I'm sorry.
167
00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:38,755
I guess I was daydreaming.
168
00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:39,298
You were saying?
169
00:05:39,380 --> 00:05:40,630
Yes, sir.
170
00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:41,215
I was saying that you're in
171
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:41,969
cabin three-forty-four,
172
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,300
promenade deck.
173
00:05:44,385 --> 00:05:45,885
You'll have to forgive Paul.
174
00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:47,890
He's just so thrilled, he's a
175
00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:49,472
little out of it.
176
00:05:49,557 --> 00:05:51,267
Paul's voice: Out of it?
177
00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:52,440
That's what I want.
178
00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:54,148
Out of it!
179
00:05:54,228 --> 00:05:55,608
And don't forget, our gift shop
180
00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:56,268
will be open if you need
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00:05:56,355 --> 00:05:58,265
to buy any last minute presents.
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00:05:58,357 --> 00:05:59,607
Thanks.
183
00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:01,442
Audrey's voice: Oooo, I hope he
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00:06:01,527 --> 00:06:02,027
gives me what I want this
185
00:06:02,111 --> 00:06:04,611
Christmas -- a divorce.
186
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:06,317
And I promise I won't exchange
187
00:06:06,407 --> 00:06:08,947
it.
188
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:09,235
Goodbye.
189
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:10,577
Bye-bye.
190
00:06:10,661 --> 00:06:12,461
Well now, that's what I
191
00:06:12,538 --> 00:06:14,248
call a happily married couple.
192
00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:16,292
I can spot 'em like that.
193
00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:20,955
I don't wanna talk about it.
194
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:21,457
Honey?
195
00:06:21,547 --> 00:06:22,547
Uh?
196
00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:25,472
Relax.
197
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:26,261
I can't help it.
198
00:06:26,344 --> 00:06:28,144
I think everyone's staring at
me.
199
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:29,511
I feel like I'm wearing a sign
200
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:30,637
that says 'ex-con.'
201
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:31,643
you've gotta get that out
202
00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:32,774
of your head.
203
00:06:32,850 --> 00:06:33,640
You're not a criminal.
204
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:34,686
You never were.
205
00:06:34,769 --> 00:06:35,809
You were innocent.
206
00:06:35,895 --> 00:06:38,395
I know that and you know that.
207
00:06:38,481 --> 00:06:40,321
Too bad the jury didn't know
that.
208
00:06:40,399 --> 00:06:42,149
Honey,i can't erase the last
three years.
209
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,235
You got a raw deal.
210
00:06:43,319 --> 00:06:44,989
But that's behind you now.
211
00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,321
Let's make a brand new start on
212
00:06:47,406 --> 00:06:48,316
our future, huh?
213
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:51,117
Okay.
214
00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,162
Oh, purser.
215
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,285
Yes, ma'am.
216
00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,251
We're mr.And Mrs. Barton.
217
00:06:55,331 --> 00:06:56,501
Ah,welcome aboard.
218
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:57,132
Now, let's see.
219
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:58,668
Barton...uh -- aloha deck,
220
00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:00,341
cabin three-fifty-three.
221
00:07:00,419 --> 00:07:00,999
Right through there.
222
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:02,087
Thank you.
223
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,341
Gee, mr.Barton,
224
00:07:03,422 --> 00:07:04,172
you look like you could
225
00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:05,627
use a little sunshine.
226
00:07:05,716 --> 00:07:10,466
Probably working too hard, huh?
227
00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:11,255
Okay, guys.
228
00:07:11,347 --> 00:07:11,847
Now, settle down.
229
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:12,891
Settle down.
230
00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:14,024
Hi, Julie.
231
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,060
Oh, hi!
232
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,693
Welcome aboard, father Mike.
233
00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:17,979
It's good to see you again.
234
00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:20,022
Tony, get off that rail.
235
00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,516
I ain't on the rail.
236
00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:22,647
No, but you were
237
00:07:22,733 --> 00:07:24,653
thinking about it.
238
00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:26,645
Julie, I'd like you to meet
239
00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:28,527
Mario, Artie, Ben, Mitch,
240
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:29,244
peanut...
241
00:07:29,323 --> 00:07:30,373
Hi.
242
00:07:30,449 --> 00:07:31,449
And Tony.
243
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:32,544
Hello.
244
00:07:32,618 --> 00:07:33,578
All: Hi.
245
00:07:33,661 --> 00:07:34,831
The first one of 'em
246
00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:36,212
that gives you any lip,
247
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:37,829
throw 'em over the side.
248
00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:39,665
Well, you guys have fun.
249
00:07:39,750 --> 00:07:40,380
Okay, guys, let's get
250
00:07:40,459 --> 00:07:41,209
going, huh?
251
00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,554
Now -- no running, and no
252
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:43,628
pushing, no shoving.
253
00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:44,673
And no fighting.
254
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:46,755
Can we breathe?
255
00:07:46,841 --> 00:07:49,891
Let me think about it.
256
00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:53,096
Was that father Mike?
257
00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:53,721
Yes, sir.
258
00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:54,596
He brought six kids with him
259
00:07:54,682 --> 00:07:55,732
this year.
260
00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:56,518
Oh well, I hope they
261
00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:57,561
behave themselves.
262
00:07:57,643 --> 00:07:59,233
Well, sir, they're kids.
263
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:01,022
They're supposed to have fun.
264
00:08:01,105 --> 00:08:01,645
That's the whole idea of
265
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:02,691
bringing these orphans on a
266
00:08:02,773 --> 00:08:04,033
holiday.
267
00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:05,398
Just keep them off the bridge.
268
00:08:05,484 --> 00:08:06,444
Yes, sir.
269
00:08:06,527 --> 00:08:08,777
Oh, did you know that some guy
270
00:08:08,863 --> 00:08:10,163
pays for a bunch of these kids
271
00:08:10,239 --> 00:08:11,409
every year and nobody knows who
272
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:12,530
it is?
273
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:13,577
Swell.
274
00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:14,949
Well, sir, did you ever ask
275
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:17,746
father Mike who puts up the
money?
276
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:18,750
Obviously, somebody
277
00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:21,751
with more dollars than sense.
278
00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:23,424
Well, merry Christmas to you,
279
00:08:23,502 --> 00:08:25,552
too, sir.
280
00:08:59,538 --> 00:09:00,578
Honey?
281
00:09:00,665 --> 00:09:01,915
Huh?
282
00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:02,879
Would you like to have
283
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,089
dinner in the cabin tonight?
284
00:09:04,168 --> 00:09:05,918
It's a lot -- cozier than the
285
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:08,633
dining room.
286
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:09,974
It's okay.
287
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:13,009
I'm ready to be with people.
288
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:15,054
Right now I'm the only people
289
00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:19,677
I want you to be with.
290
00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:21,517
I never deserved you, Lila
291
00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:27,982
-- now even less than before.
292
00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:30,437
Honey, everything's gonna
293
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:31,488
be all right.
294
00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:33,280
When we get back home, you can
295
00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:35,534
make a brand new start.
296
00:09:35,616 --> 00:09:37,486
Sure.
297
00:09:37,576 --> 00:09:38,616
What'll I do?
298
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:40,003
I'm a lawyer, Lila.
299
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,369
A lawyer who can't practice law.
300
00:09:42,456 --> 00:09:47,666
You'll find something.
301
00:09:47,753 --> 00:09:49,053
Yeah, maybe I'll just --
302
00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,170
answer every ad I see for a
303
00:09:51,257 --> 00:09:53,797
convicted embezzler.
304
00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:04,809
Hi, merrill.
305
00:10:04,895 --> 00:10:06,805
Oh, hi, father Mike.
306
00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:08,357
How're the kids?
307
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:09,191
Oh, they're getting
308
00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:10,225
ready for dinner.
309
00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,898
I only had to break up one water
310
00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:14,697
fight and one soap fight.
311
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:15,070
Well, at least they'll come to
312
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:17,696
dinner clean.
313
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:19,453
You're good with kids.
314
00:10:19,535 --> 00:10:21,865
They're just short people.
315
00:10:21,954 --> 00:10:23,374
Maybe that's why you're a priest
and
316
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:27,036
-- I'm a captain.
317
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:30,546
I understand the sea...
318
00:10:30,629 --> 00:10:31,759
People...
319
00:10:34,091 --> 00:10:34,881
Something on your mind?
320
00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:35,507
Me?
321
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:39,063
No.
322
00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:42,558
Nothing.
323
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:44,231
"Nothing" can weigh a ton,
324
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:47,360
can't it?
325
00:10:47,438 --> 00:10:49,268
Well, it's just so silly.
326
00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:50,397
Here I am on a
327
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:54,203
ship full of people and...
328
00:10:54,278 --> 00:10:57,068
And you're lonely.
329
00:10:57,156 --> 00:10:58,906
Yeah.
330
00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:00,411
And it's Christmas and
331
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:01,913
-- that's blowing it all outta
332
00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:03,584
proportion.
333
00:11:03,662 --> 00:11:06,792
I told you it was silly.
334
00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:07,924
Y'know, that's what
335
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,380
steams me about Christmas.
336
00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:10,750
It's supposed to bring people
337
00:11:10,836 --> 00:11:13,586
closer,
338
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:17,013
so often it,isolates them.
339
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:20,851
Look, merrill, you must have
340
00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:23,220
friends on the crew.
341
00:11:23,307 --> 00:11:24,887
At best,
342
00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:28,305
they tolerate me.
343
00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:29,896
You're not only lonely,
344
00:11:29,980 --> 00:11:31,270
you're -- feeling sorry for
345
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,397
yourself, too.
346
00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:33,783
Hey, you don't
347
00:11:33,859 --> 00:11:36,279
pussyfoot around, do you?
348
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:37,492
It's part of my charm.
349
00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:40,951
Mike, I wanna be friendly with
the crew
350
00:11:41,033 --> 00:11:43,123
but I'm the captain.
351
00:11:43,202 --> 00:11:44,292
I mean, I -- I can't be their
352
00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:46,460
friend and lead them, too.
353
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:49,459
Really?
354
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:50,132
Well, I don't know.
355
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:52,669
I -- I heard of this leader once
356
00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:56,133
who was a friend to everyone.
357
00:11:56,215 --> 00:11:58,005
Well, he had this technique, he
358
00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:00,592
used,
359
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:01,548
that really helped him
360
00:12:01,637 --> 00:12:05,977
to get close to his 'crew'.
361
00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:09,648
-- As I remember, it was
something like,
362
00:12:09,728 --> 00:12:12,108
'love thy neighbor as thyself.'
363
00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,356
worked so well for him,
364
00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:16,033
they celebrate his
365
00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:18,200
birthday every year.
366
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:21,659
Right about now.
367
00:12:21,740 --> 00:12:22,990
Yeah.
368
00:12:23,075 --> 00:12:24,655
But how do I make that work for
369
00:12:24,743 --> 00:12:25,703
me?
370
00:12:25,786 --> 00:12:27,366
Merrill, your crew does more
371
00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:29,495
than just run this ship.
372
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:31,042
They have all sorts of
interests.
373
00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:35,795
Find out about them.
374
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:36,840
Get involved, and do you know
375
00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,632
what the result will be?
376
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:39,966
They'll celebrate my
377
00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:42,180
birthday every year?
378
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:45,641
Right about now?
379
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:47,733
Only if you were born in
December.
380
00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:05,660
Are you sure you wouldn't
381
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:07,203
like a little wine,dear?
382
00:13:07,286 --> 00:13:08,196
Are you silly?
383
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:09,367
You know I can't stand the taste
384
00:13:09,455 --> 00:13:10,495
of alcohol.
385
00:13:10,581 --> 00:13:13,541
I'll just stick with my iced
tea.
386
00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:15,706
Well, here's to us.
387
00:13:15,794 --> 00:13:16,754
To us.
388
00:13:21,091 --> 00:13:21,591
Paul's voice: How can I ask the
389
00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:25,215
poor woman for a divorce?
390
00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:26,934
It would break her heart.
391
00:13:27,014 --> 00:13:29,104
She's so much in love with me.
392
00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:30,103
Audrey's voice: Look how he's
393
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:31,234
looking at me.
394
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:35,360
Like a lovesick puppy.
395
00:13:35,439 --> 00:13:36,269
How can I tell a guy like that
396
00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:39,027
to kiss off?
397
00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:39,529
Paul's voice: If I could only
398
00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:42,780
get her to hate me.
399
00:13:42,863 --> 00:13:45,373
Naw -- that's impossible.
400
00:13:45,449 --> 00:13:47,869
I'm too perfect.
401
00:13:47,952 --> 00:13:49,412
Audrey's voice: It's my own
fault.
402
00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:51,405
I've made life too pleasant for
403
00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:58,247
him.
404
00:13:58,337 --> 00:13:59,957
What're you looking for?
405
00:14:00,047 --> 00:14:01,257
Oh -- nothing.
406
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:03,130
Nothing.
407
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:03,837
Honey, you know someone
408
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:04,886
you oughta call when we get back
409
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:05,929
home?
410
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:09,271
Walter Perry.
411
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:10,308
Look, darling, let's --
412
00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:13,101
let's just forget about all
that.
413
00:14:13,185 --> 00:14:13,765
Why, he was more than just
414
00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:14,902
your law partner, he was your
415
00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:15,559
friend.
416
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:16,976
He never asked for a cent when
417
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,114
he defended you.
418
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:19,860
Oh, I know that.
419
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:21,032
And he was very good to me
420
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:21,740
while you were away.
421
00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:23,449
He used to call all the time --
422
00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:24,779
see if I needed any money or
423
00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:25,913
anything.
424
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:27,910
Believe me, Walter Perry is a
425
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:31,082
good friend of yours.
426
00:14:31,161 --> 00:14:31,951
I've gotta get some air.
427
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:32,707
I'll go with you.
428
00:14:32,788 --> 00:14:33,788
No!
429
00:14:33,872 --> 00:14:34,872
I -- I have some things to think
430
00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:36,417
about.
431
00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:37,460
I understand.
432
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:41,303
I'll,
433
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:44,970
be back in five minutes.
434
00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:47,180
Take ten.
435
00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:53,141
Hey, man,
436
00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:54,935
what's happening?
437
00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:55,599
Excuse me, sir.
438
00:14:55,686 --> 00:14:56,556
I was just on my way up to the
439
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:56,975
lounge.
440
00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:57,482
Oh well, well.
441
00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:59,323
I -- I can dig that.
442
00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:00,318
You have to split.
443
00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:01,359
That's cool.
444
00:15:01,442 --> 00:15:02,072
That's cool.
445
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:04,191
Uh -- well, I'll lay some words
446
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:06,778
on you later.Give me five.
447
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:13,947
Sir, is your malaria
448
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:15,288
acting up again?
449
00:15:15,372 --> 00:15:16,792
Listen, I'll go to your quarters
450
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:18,004
and get your pills for you.
451
00:15:21,962 --> 00:15:24,802
Being a pal isn't gonna be easy.
452
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:35,393
Excuse me.
453
00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:36,806
I wonder if it's possible for me
454
00:15:36,894 --> 00:15:37,854
to cash a traveler's check?
455
00:15:37,936 --> 00:15:38,686
Oh yeah, sure.
456
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:39,521
I see you didn't leave home
457
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:42,685
without them.
458
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,315
-- Uh, Walter Perry.
459
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:46,201
Okay.
460
00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:47,358
Fifty dollar bill okay?
461
00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:48,486
It's fine.
462
00:15:48,572 --> 00:15:49,202
There you go.
463
00:15:49,281 --> 00:16:00,041
Thank you.
464
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:01,125
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!
465
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:02,210
Don't shake your Christmas
466
00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:03,344
present.
467
00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:05,010
I don't want you to spoil the
468
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:06,049
surprise.
469
00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:07,171
Paul's voice: Surprise?
470
00:16:07,257 --> 00:16:08,377
I'll bet it's gonna be another
471
00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:10,387
one of those blue ties.
472
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:11,719
What can it be this year,
473
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:12,724
darling?
474
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:15,595
Oh no, I'm not telling.
475
00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:16,603
Audrey's voice: I was gonna get
476
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:18,234
you a monogrammed shirt, but I
477
00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:20,980
forgot your name.
478
00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:22,063
Don't peek at your present
479
00:16:22,147 --> 00:16:23,187
while I'm in there, okay?
480
00:16:23,273 --> 00:16:24,653
Oh no.
481
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:30,735
Audrey's voice: Another bottle
482
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,203
of that cheap perfume --
483
00:16:32,282 --> 00:16:34,412
oriental wind.
484
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,413
The only perfume that comes with
485
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:39,705
a bowl a rice.
486
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:42,380
Well -- here it comes.
487
00:16:42,459 --> 00:16:47,549
(Sound of Paul gargling)
488
00:16:47,631 --> 00:16:48,591
And now.
489
00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:56,774
(More gargling)
490
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,729
A little louder, they'd abandon
ship.
491
00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:06,232
It's all yours, darling.
492
00:17:06,316 --> 00:17:09,236
Thanks, sweetheart.
493
00:17:11,488 --> 00:17:12,108
Paul's voice: But please, just
494
00:17:12,197 --> 00:17:14,617
this once, don't sing.
495
00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:16,620
Audrey's voice: Mi, mi, mi, mi,
496
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:17,752
mi, mi!
497
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:22,328
Mi, mi, mi, mi, mi, mi!
498
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:23,376
Paul's voice: If we weren't at
sea,
499
00:17:23,459 --> 00:17:27,299
a moose would answer.
500
00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:28,419
Don't look.
501
00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:29,505
You know what she's gonna look
502
00:17:29,590 --> 00:17:30,760
like.
503
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:38,772
-- I told ya not to look.
504
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:40,809
I can't take anymore of this.
505
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,313
But she's got to be the one to
506
00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:43,484
ask for the divorce.
507
00:17:43,562 --> 00:17:47,652
Why should I be the heavy?
508
00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:48,613
Audrey's voice: I've got to do
509
00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:50,072
something so terrible he'll beg
510
00:17:50,152 --> 00:17:52,152
me for a divorce.
511
00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:53,237
But what?
512
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,992
I mean -- he even likes my
513
00:17:55,073 --> 00:17:56,873
singing.
514
00:18:01,872 --> 00:18:02,832
Goodnight, sweetheart.
515
00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:05,125
Goodnight, darling.
516
00:18:17,387 --> 00:18:18,557
Oh, captain!
517
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:19,639
Well, you see, I just had a few
518
00:18:19,723 --> 00:18:20,683
minutes and I thought I'd do a
519
00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:21,976
little needlepoint, but -- well,
520
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:23,189
I can see my two minutes are up
521
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:24,348
and I'd better go!
522
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:27,226
It's very pretty.
523
00:18:27,314 --> 00:18:31,194
Well -- thank you.
524
00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:32,356
You know, a lot of men
525
00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:33,494
do needlepoint.
526
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:34,530
Even football players.
527
00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,373
Do you think that maybe you
could,
528
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:39,578
teach me how to do it?
529
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:43,370
Ah -- sure, sir.
530
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,495
Some other time.
531
00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:47,501
Well, what about now?
532
00:18:47,584 --> 00:18:48,544
Okay.
533
00:18:48,627 --> 00:18:51,917
Uh -- well, you see, you take
534
00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:55,554
the needle and you put it in
535
00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:58,474
this hole and then bring it down
536
00:19:00,722 --> 00:19:03,682
-- through here -- and down like
537
00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:04,057
that.
538
00:19:04,143 --> 00:19:05,523
I see.
539
00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:06,272
And that's a stitch.
540
00:19:06,353 --> 00:19:07,903
Well, thank you.
541
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,113
-- Like this?
542
00:19:15,195 --> 00:19:18,235
Perfect.
543
00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:19,623
Well look, why don't I
544
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:21,990
-- get a kit and -- maybe you
545
00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:25,747
and I could work on it together.
546
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,121
Here, take mine.
547
00:19:27,207 --> 00:19:28,877
You know, to tell you the truth,
548
00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:31,379
needlepoint bores me stiff.
549
00:19:31,461 --> 00:19:33,301
I got to go.
550
00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:40,635
Merrill, you're supposed
551
00:19:40,721 --> 00:19:42,761
to get involved with your crew.
552
00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:44,308
Not stand around doing
553
00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:46,941
needlepoint.
554
00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,626
Oh, I already have a drink.
555
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:14,499
Well, you can't have too many.
556
00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:15,918
That looks delicious.
557
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:17,296
Can I have some more of it?
558
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:19,432
As many as you like.
559
00:20:19,509 --> 00:20:21,469
As long as you promise not to
560
00:20:21,553 --> 00:20:22,643
drive back to your cabin.
561
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,431
We'll take a cab.
562
00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:27,604
Thanks.
563
00:20:27,684 --> 00:20:28,814
Here you go, sir --
564
00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:31,944
guaranteed to bring on a smile.
565
00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:32,482
Thanks.
566
00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:33,324
Keep the change.
567
00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:33,978
See?
568
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,986
I told you it was guaranteed.
569
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:39,319
Sure you won't have one?
570
00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:45,453
Hello, Walt.
571
00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:48,002
Dan!
572
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:52,330
I -- I...
573
00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:53,167
At a loss for words,
574
00:20:53,251 --> 00:20:55,001
counselor?
575
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,377
I never thought I'd see the day.
576
00:20:57,464 --> 00:20:57,844
Well, no.
577
00:20:57,923 --> 00:21:00,013
It's just that I,
578
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:02,472
i thought that you were still
in...
579
00:21:02,552 --> 00:21:05,392
In prison.
580
00:21:05,472 --> 00:21:06,852
No, you see, I was paroled last
581
00:21:06,932 --> 00:21:08,182
week.
582
00:21:08,266 --> 00:21:10,186
You know, good behavior and that
583
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:11,269
sort a thing.
584
00:21:11,353 --> 00:21:12,353
Walt!
585
00:21:12,437 --> 00:21:13,437
Lila!
586
00:21:13,522 --> 00:21:15,402
We were just talking about
587
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:15,692
you last night!
588
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:16,984
Really?
589
00:21:20,237 --> 00:21:21,527
-- Well, I just can't get over
590
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:22,573
this.
591
00:21:22,656 --> 00:21:23,696
It's great.
592
00:21:23,782 --> 00:21:24,782
It's just great.
593
00:21:24,866 --> 00:21:26,866
Yes, it's great.
594
00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:30,540
Well, we're gonna have a
595
00:21:30,622 --> 00:21:32,672
lot to talk about, huh?
596
00:21:32,749 --> 00:21:34,039
Unfortunately, I made an
597
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:35,536
appointment with the barber --
598
00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:37,047
and you know how they are if you
599
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,419
keep them waiting,
600
00:21:38,505 --> 00:21:40,715
no sideburns.
601
00:21:40,799 --> 00:21:41,879
But look -- promise me that
602
00:21:41,967 --> 00:21:43,217
we'll get together later, okay?
603
00:21:43,301 --> 00:21:43,721
Promise?
604
00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:48,722
Huh?
605
00:21:48,807 --> 00:21:50,227
-- Gee, this is really a
606
00:21:50,308 --> 00:21:51,268
surprise.
607
00:21:51,351 --> 00:21:53,021
Fantastic!
608
00:21:59,317 --> 00:22:00,067
He acted a little strange,
609
00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:01,742
didn't he?
610
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:05,910
Well, dear, he's a strange guy.
611
00:22:05,991 --> 00:22:06,581
It's not everybody that would
612
00:22:06,658 --> 00:22:08,538
let his supposed best friend go
613
00:22:08,618 --> 00:22:11,578
to jail for a crime he commited.
614
00:22:11,663 --> 00:22:13,423
Walt?!
615
00:22:13,498 --> 00:22:13,868
Yes, Walt.
616
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:14,917
Oh no.
617
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,630
Lila, I had three years to
618
00:22:16,710 --> 00:22:17,750
think about it.
619
00:22:17,836 --> 00:22:20,256
I went over every detail of that
620
00:22:20,338 --> 00:22:21,628
trial, night after night.
621
00:22:21,715 --> 00:22:23,755
I memorized the transcript.
622
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:26,262
It always ended up to just one
name,
623
00:22:26,344 --> 00:22:30,184
good, old Walt Perry.
624
00:22:30,265 --> 00:22:31,515
Dan, you can't be sure.
625
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,730
I wasn't.
626
00:22:34,811 --> 00:22:35,401
Until now.
627
00:22:35,479 --> 00:22:36,689
I had to see him face to face.
628
00:22:36,772 --> 00:22:39,442
I had to see it in his eyes.
629
00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:42,904
Now I know.
630
00:22:42,986 --> 00:22:47,116
And he knows I know.
631
00:22:47,199 --> 00:22:48,579
How much is this one?
632
00:22:48,658 --> 00:22:49,948
Forty-eight dollars.
633
00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:51,655
Oh, way too expensive.
634
00:22:51,745 --> 00:22:53,455
Thanks anyway.
635
00:22:53,538 --> 00:22:54,618
Now, you're the kinda woman
636
00:22:54,706 --> 00:22:57,916
I shoulda married.
637
00:22:58,001 --> 00:22:58,791
I beg your pardon?
638
00:22:58,877 --> 00:23:00,297
Well, my last wife never
639
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:02,088
asked the price of anything.
640
00:23:02,172 --> 00:23:04,342
Is that why you divorced her?
641
00:23:04,424 --> 00:23:05,474
It was either the divorce courts
642
00:23:05,550 --> 00:23:07,970
or the bankruptcy courts.
643
00:23:08,053 --> 00:23:09,973
Oh, so she spent you
644
00:23:10,055 --> 00:23:11,095
into divorce.
645
00:23:11,181 --> 00:23:12,141
Let me put it this way.
646
00:23:12,224 --> 00:23:12,814
If she didn't show up at
647
00:23:12,891 --> 00:23:14,311
Tiffany's once a week, they'd
648
00:23:14,392 --> 00:23:16,352
send her a get well card.
649
00:23:16,436 --> 00:23:20,976
Oh -- well, thanks for the tip.
650
00:23:21,066 --> 00:23:23,026
I mean, the warning.
651
00:23:23,110 --> 00:23:24,690
-- Miss, do you sell jewelry?
652
00:23:24,778 --> 00:23:26,818
What kind?
653
00:23:26,905 --> 00:23:28,815
Expensive!
654
00:23:31,785 --> 00:23:32,865
I just can't get over it,
655
00:23:32,953 --> 00:23:34,833
Claire, you look fantastic.
656
00:23:34,913 --> 00:23:36,503
Well, I should.
657
00:23:36,581 --> 00:23:37,541
I just lost a hundred and sixty
658
00:23:37,624 --> 00:23:38,674
pounds.
659
00:23:38,750 --> 00:23:41,670
I divorced George.
660
00:23:41,753 --> 00:23:43,343
You divorced George?
661
00:23:43,421 --> 00:23:45,011
Why?
662
00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:47,180
The things he did.
663
00:23:47,259 --> 00:23:48,639
I don't wanna talk about it.
664
00:23:48,718 --> 00:23:50,678
Oh, you can tell me.
665
00:23:50,762 --> 00:23:52,062
No, I can't.
666
00:23:52,139 --> 00:23:52,719
Paul's voice: For Pete's sake,
667
00:23:52,806 --> 00:23:53,846
tell her.
668
00:23:53,932 --> 00:23:55,392
All right, I'll tell you.
669
00:23:55,475 --> 00:23:57,935
Thanks.
670
00:23:58,019 --> 00:23:59,149
Every time we went out
671
00:23:59,229 --> 00:24:00,729
he would embarrass me.
672
00:24:00,814 --> 00:24:01,984
He'd have a couple of drinks and
673
00:24:02,065 --> 00:24:03,015
he thought he was the life of
674
00:24:03,108 --> 00:24:04,068
the party.
675
00:24:04,151 --> 00:24:05,651
It was like being married to the
676
00:24:05,735 --> 00:24:06,695
gong show.
677
00:24:06,778 --> 00:24:08,818
Did George drink too much?
678
00:24:08,905 --> 00:24:10,195
Judge for yourself.
679
00:24:10,282 --> 00:24:12,532
At my uncle's funeral, he wore a
680
00:24:12,617 --> 00:24:16,197
black lampshade.
681
00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:17,538
Honey, don't ever marry a man
682
00:24:17,622 --> 00:24:20,922
who drinks.
683
00:24:21,001 --> 00:24:22,041
Say pal, could you tell me
684
00:24:22,127 --> 00:24:24,167
the way to the nearest bar?
685
00:24:24,254 --> 00:24:27,014
Thanks.
686
00:24:27,090 --> 00:24:28,840
Oh no, doc, up a little higher.
687
00:24:28,925 --> 00:24:30,635
A little higher, yeah.
688
00:24:30,719 --> 00:24:32,389
Now to the right.
689
00:24:32,471 --> 00:24:33,101
Up here?
690
00:24:33,180 --> 00:24:34,890
No, more to the right.
691
00:24:34,973 --> 00:24:36,393
Down two needles.
692
00:24:36,474 --> 00:24:39,194
To the left.
693
00:24:39,269 --> 00:24:41,189
No, no, more to the left, doc.
694
00:24:41,271 --> 00:24:42,361
I don't know.
695
00:24:42,439 --> 00:24:43,399
Something's off-center.
696
00:24:43,481 --> 00:24:44,731
You're off-center.
697
00:24:44,816 --> 00:24:46,026
I know what it is.
698
00:24:46,109 --> 00:24:47,359
We forgot to hang an angel on
699
00:24:47,444 --> 00:24:47,864
the tree.
700
00:24:47,944 --> 00:24:51,034
How about a purser?
701
00:24:51,114 --> 00:24:53,744
Man does not appreciate art.
702
00:24:53,825 --> 00:24:55,905
Father, you know a lot of jokes.
703
00:24:55,994 --> 00:24:57,584
Well, I don't think Vegas is
704
00:24:57,662 --> 00:24:58,462
ready for me, merrill.
705
00:24:58,538 --> 00:24:59,578
No, no, no.
706
00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:00,874
You know, my crew is always
707
00:25:00,957 --> 00:25:02,877
telling jokes and I thought that
708
00:25:02,959 --> 00:25:04,089
if there was a joke that I could
709
00:25:04,169 --> 00:25:06,299
come up with...
710
00:25:06,379 --> 00:25:08,419
Oh, I get it.
711
00:25:08,506 --> 00:25:09,466
Well, let's see.
712
00:25:09,549 --> 00:25:11,639
Oh, well, the bishop told me a
713
00:25:11,718 --> 00:25:13,798
couple a great ones.
714
00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:14,637
But I don't think your
715
00:25:14,721 --> 00:25:17,931
crew speaks Latin.
716
00:25:18,016 --> 00:25:19,226
How about this?
717
00:25:19,309 --> 00:25:21,769
This martian comes down from
718
00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:24,063
space and he lands right in the
719
00:25:24,147 --> 00:25:25,607
middle of the desert, next to
720
00:25:25,690 --> 00:25:27,820
this beat up old saloon.
721
00:25:27,901 --> 00:25:30,151
Well, he goes in and the first
722
00:25:30,237 --> 00:25:32,157
thing he sees is the pinball
723
00:25:32,239 --> 00:25:33,279
machine.
724
00:25:33,365 --> 00:25:34,945
Well, the lights are flashing
725
00:25:35,033 --> 00:25:35,953
and the bells are ringing like
726
00:25:36,034 --> 00:25:37,294
crazy.
727
00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:39,499
So,the martian goes over to
728
00:25:39,579 --> 00:25:42,829
it and he says, 'hey,sweeheart,
729
00:25:42,916 --> 00:25:44,076
what's a pretty girl like you
730
00:25:44,167 --> 00:25:46,497
doing in a place like this?'
731
00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:52,758
Funny.
732
00:25:52,842 --> 00:25:54,472
Well, it is even funnier
733
00:25:54,552 --> 00:25:56,892
in Latin.
734
00:25:56,972 --> 00:25:59,682
All right, I'll try it.
735
00:25:59,766 --> 00:26:00,806
Okay, guys.
736
00:26:00,892 --> 00:26:01,852
Time to get down to some serious
737
00:26:01,935 --> 00:26:02,975
business here.
738
00:26:03,061 --> 00:26:03,521
Who's gonna be Santa claus
739
00:26:03,603 --> 00:26:04,853
tonight?
740
00:26:04,938 --> 00:26:05,478
Oh, well, I don't think
741
00:26:05,563 --> 00:26:06,613
there's anything to decide.
742
00:26:06,690 --> 00:26:08,190
It is my turn.
743
00:26:08,275 --> 00:26:09,315
You?
744
00:26:09,401 --> 00:26:11,361
A woman can't be Santa claus.
745
00:26:11,444 --> 00:26:12,034
Well, why not?
746
00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:13,152
I thought this was supposed to
747
00:26:13,238 --> 00:26:14,658
be an equal opportunity holiday.
748
00:26:14,739 --> 00:26:15,989
Okay.
749
00:26:16,074 --> 00:26:17,494
Lay a 'ho-ho-ho' on us.
750
00:26:17,575 --> 00:26:19,695
Ok.
751
00:26:19,786 --> 00:26:23,496
'Ho-ho-ho'.
752
00:26:23,581 --> 00:26:25,461
No, the world's not ready
753
00:26:25,542 --> 00:26:27,172
for a soprano Santa claus.
754
00:26:27,252 --> 00:26:28,672
Well,it's coming
755
00:26:28,753 --> 00:26:31,173
along very well, guys.
756
00:26:31,256 --> 00:26:32,916
Which reminds me of this great
757
00:26:33,008 --> 00:26:34,008
joke.
758
00:26:34,092 --> 00:26:36,012
It's Christmas time one year and
759
00:26:36,094 --> 00:26:37,354
this martian lands in the
760
00:26:37,429 --> 00:26:39,349
desert, and he goes up to this
761
00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:40,471
old bar.
762
00:26:40,557 --> 00:26:42,517
It's really beat up, you know?
763
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,390
And the first thing he sees is a
764
00:26:44,477 --> 00:26:46,057
pinball machine and he goes over
765
00:26:46,146 --> 00:26:47,856
and well, the lights were
766
00:26:47,939 --> 00:26:49,359
flashing, the bells were going
767
00:26:49,441 --> 00:26:50,861
and everything and well he says
to it,
768
00:26:50,942 --> 00:26:53,492
he says,now get this.
769
00:26:53,570 --> 00:26:56,410
He says, 'hiya, sweetheart,
770
00:26:56,489 --> 00:26:57,869
what's a pinball machine doing
771
00:26:57,949 --> 00:27:00,039
in a nice place like this?
772
00:27:10,170 --> 00:27:13,550
It was even funnier in Latin.
773
00:27:13,631 --> 00:27:14,551
Okay, let's get back to
774
00:27:14,632 --> 00:27:15,592
reality.
775
00:27:15,675 --> 00:27:17,175
Who's gonna play Santa claus?
776
00:27:17,260 --> 00:27:18,220
Me.
777
00:27:18,303 --> 00:27:19,893
I'm the perfect Santa.
778
00:27:19,971 --> 00:27:21,721
I own the Santa suit.
779
00:27:21,806 --> 00:27:26,346
So -- I'm Santa.
780
00:27:26,436 --> 00:27:30,396
Good luck, sir.
781
00:27:30,482 --> 00:27:33,232
Well -- how am I doing?
782
00:27:33,318 --> 00:27:34,738
Merrill, there are ways
783
00:27:34,819 --> 00:27:37,069
of joining in,
784
00:27:37,155 --> 00:27:41,865
and ways of joining in.
785
00:27:41,951 --> 00:27:43,581
That bad, huh?
786
00:27:43,661 --> 00:27:45,121
Worse.
787
00:28:06,309 --> 00:28:07,889
Hey well, merry Christmas, crew.
788
00:28:07,977 --> 00:28:09,057
Merry Christmas.
789
00:28:13,316 --> 00:28:14,896
Uhh,isaac,what's in this?
790
00:28:14,984 --> 00:28:18,784
Fruit juice and rum. Made from
an old secret recipe.
791
00:28:18,863 --> 00:28:21,373
What's the secret?
792
00:28:27,372 --> 00:28:30,462
I'll have a re-fill.
793
00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:33,342
Oh sure golpher.
794
00:28:42,846 --> 00:28:43,846
Fruit juice.
795
00:28:43,930 --> 00:28:45,470
Back to the drawing board.
796
00:28:51,771 --> 00:28:52,611
Dan?
797
00:28:52,689 --> 00:28:54,649
Uh?
798
00:28:54,732 --> 00:28:56,192
Honey is Christmas Eve.
799
00:28:56,276 --> 00:29:00,816
Just for tonight, let's forget
about Walter Perry,
800
00:29:00,905 --> 00:29:02,485
and the world and everything.
801
00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:06,954
Let's make this the best
Christmas Eve ever.
802
00:29:07,036 --> 00:29:09,576
All right.
803
00:29:16,588 --> 00:29:21,888
This sure beats an electric
train.
804
00:29:21,968 --> 00:29:24,548
Hey, do you want to exchange
gifts now?
805
00:29:24,637 --> 00:29:28,017
We do, we'll never make that
party.
806
00:29:28,099 --> 00:29:31,019
Oh, come on.
807
00:29:31,102 --> 00:29:34,482
Ok, let's go.
808
00:29:34,564 --> 00:29:36,694
Uh, I get you a handkerchief for
your..
809
00:29:36,774 --> 00:29:37,154
Oh, I'll get it.
810
00:29:37,233 --> 00:29:38,943
This all right.
811
00:29:42,947 --> 00:29:44,277
Dan!
812
00:29:47,285 --> 00:29:48,235
Oh my god.
813
00:29:48,328 --> 00:29:49,158
No.
814
00:29:49,245 --> 00:29:52,245
Dan,
815
00:29:52,332 --> 00:29:57,382
you knew Walter Perry was going
to be on board, didn't you?
816
00:29:57,462 --> 00:30:00,382
You came here for revenge.
817
00:30:04,385 --> 00:30:05,675
Look Lily,
818
00:30:07,931 --> 00:30:10,271
this is my business.
819
00:30:10,350 --> 00:30:11,890
Your business?
820
00:30:11,976 --> 00:30:13,726
Whay about me?
821
00:30:13,811 --> 00:30:15,611
You weren't the only one in jail
for three years.
822
00:30:15,688 --> 00:30:19,528
I was in a prison of my own.
823
00:30:19,609 --> 00:30:23,239
What do you think was like
without you?
824
00:30:23,321 --> 00:30:25,531
Dan,
825
00:30:25,615 --> 00:30:29,695
if you love me, don't do this.
826
00:30:29,786 --> 00:30:31,366
You know I love you.
827
00:30:31,454 --> 00:30:36,084
You kill him, you kill us.
828
00:30:36,167 --> 00:30:38,797
Please,dan.
829
00:31:02,986 --> 00:31:05,316
Issac,
830
00:31:05,405 --> 00:31:07,115
removed the dead soldier and
open me a new
831
00:31:07,198 --> 00:31:08,948
recruit.
832
00:31:09,033 --> 00:31:10,953
Sure.
833
00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:12,285
Mr.baynes.
834
00:31:12,370 --> 00:31:13,000
I thought you said you
835
00:31:13,079 --> 00:31:13,829
were a teetotaler.
836
00:31:13,913 --> 00:31:15,673
Me?
837
00:31:15,748 --> 00:31:19,378
I musta been drunk when I said
it.
838
00:31:19,460 --> 00:31:22,460
Isaac, what color lampshade goes
839
00:31:22,547 --> 00:31:23,967
with this outfit I'm wearing?
840
00:31:24,048 --> 00:31:24,758
I don't know.
841
00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:26,381
What color are your socks?
842
00:31:36,436 --> 00:31:38,476
Audrey, is -- is that you?
843
00:31:38,563 --> 00:31:39,023
Never mind me.
844
00:31:39,105 --> 00:31:40,315
Since when did you start
845
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:41,938
drinking?
846
00:31:42,025 --> 00:31:43,315
I can't remember.
847
00:31:43,401 --> 00:31:45,451
I'm drinking to forget.
848
00:31:45,528 --> 00:31:46,648
How much have you had?
849
00:31:46,738 --> 00:31:48,698
Plenty!
850
00:31:51,701 --> 00:31:53,331
Say what's all this gonna cost?
851
00:31:53,411 --> 00:31:54,751
Plenty!
852
00:31:57,749 --> 00:32:01,499
Boy, I hope I'm seeing double.
853
00:32:01,586 --> 00:32:02,876
You're going to be seeing triple
854
00:32:02,962 --> 00:32:03,502
when we get to the room,
855
00:32:03,588 --> 00:32:04,668
because I have a whole lotta
856
00:32:04,756 --> 00:32:05,836
new stuff down there.
857
00:32:05,923 --> 00:32:09,263
You expect me to pay for this?
858
00:32:09,344 --> 00:32:12,314
You got it, ace.
859
00:32:12,388 --> 00:32:15,348
Uh -- dear, isn't there
860
00:32:15,433 --> 00:32:17,143
something you forgot to ask me
861
00:32:17,226 --> 00:32:18,346
for?
862
00:32:18,436 --> 00:32:20,896
It starts with a 'd'.
863
00:32:23,900 --> 00:32:33,870
Yeah, you wanna dance.
864
00:32:33,951 --> 00:32:44,341
Yeah, you wanna dance.
865
00:32:44,420 --> 00:32:45,840
Something you wanna ask me?
866
00:32:45,922 --> 00:32:47,172
Yes.
867
00:32:47,256 --> 00:32:48,506
Get off my foot!
868
00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,232
More punch?
869
00:32:59,310 --> 00:33:00,560
Yeah.
870
00:33:00,645 --> 00:33:01,895
But this time -- tell him to put
871
00:33:01,979 --> 00:33:04,019
a little fruit juice in it.
872
00:33:04,107 --> 00:33:06,897
Okay.
873
00:33:06,984 --> 00:33:07,784
You're complaining to me
874
00:33:07,860 --> 00:33:10,240
about a bad bridge partner?
875
00:33:10,321 --> 00:33:11,571
You're lucky.
876
00:33:11,656 --> 00:33:13,526
You know, I once had a law
partner.
877
00:33:13,616 --> 00:33:16,406
He stole every penny the firm
had.
878
00:33:16,494 --> 00:33:17,414
Of course, he went to prison.
879
00:33:17,495 --> 00:33:18,445
Well, at least, he had to
880
00:33:18,538 --> 00:33:19,748
pay for it.
881
00:33:19,831 --> 00:33:21,001
Yeah, he paid.
882
00:33:30,341 --> 00:33:31,631
So, where's Santa?
883
00:33:31,718 --> 00:33:33,088
He's supposed to be here by now.
884
00:33:33,177 --> 00:33:33,967
Well, maybe his reindeers
885
00:33:34,053 --> 00:33:34,513
are having a little trouble with
886
00:33:34,595 --> 00:33:35,755
their radar equipment.
887
00:33:35,847 --> 00:33:36,427
Yeah, that blitzen is a
888
00:33:36,514 --> 00:33:37,894
lousy navigator.
889
00:33:49,986 --> 00:33:50,946
Ho!
890
00:33:51,028 --> 00:33:52,068
Ho!
891
00:33:52,155 --> 00:33:53,605
Ho!
892
00:33:53,698 --> 00:33:54,738
No.
893
00:33:54,824 --> 00:33:55,914
No.
894
00:33:55,992 --> 00:33:58,452
No.
895
00:33:58,536 --> 00:33:59,496
Ho!
896
00:33:59,579 --> 00:34:00,619
Ho!
897
00:34:00,705 --> 00:34:02,455
Ho!
898
00:34:02,540 --> 00:34:04,330
Merry Christmas, everybody!
899
00:34:07,336 --> 00:34:08,296
Ho!
900
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:09,629
Ho!
901
00:34:09,714 --> 00:34:10,674
Ho!...
902
00:34:10,757 --> 00:34:11,377
I've never seen the captain
903
00:34:11,466 --> 00:34:12,466
look better.
904
00:34:12,550 --> 00:34:15,340
Who writes his dialogue?
905
00:34:15,428 --> 00:34:17,308
Well now, let's see
906
00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:19,018
what Santa has in his bag
907
00:34:19,098 --> 00:34:20,138
tonight.
908
00:34:20,224 --> 00:34:22,104
Let's see...
909
00:34:22,185 --> 00:34:23,135
Well, yes.
910
00:34:23,227 --> 00:34:24,437
There's something for Mario.
911
00:34:28,524 --> 00:34:31,534
Something for Artie, yes.
912
00:34:34,530 --> 00:34:35,490
Let's see.
913
00:34:35,573 --> 00:34:38,993
And...and Ben.
914
00:34:40,953 --> 00:34:43,833
Let's see what we have here.
915
00:34:43,915 --> 00:34:44,955
Oh, yes.
916
00:34:45,041 --> 00:34:46,671
For Mitch.
917
00:34:46,751 --> 00:34:50,881
And for peanut.
918
00:34:50,963 --> 00:34:52,473
What's your real name peanut?
919
00:34:52,548 --> 00:34:53,508
Shorty.
920
00:34:53,591 --> 00:34:54,381
Right!
921
00:34:54,467 --> 00:34:59,347
I'll bet it's a baseball mitt.
922
00:34:59,430 --> 00:35:01,470
What about me?
923
00:35:01,557 --> 00:35:02,517
Oh.
924
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,560
Uh -- you're...?
925
00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:06,194
Tony.
926
00:35:06,270 --> 00:35:07,520
Tony, that's right.
927
00:35:07,605 --> 00:35:08,055
Yes.
928
00:35:08,147 --> 00:35:11,227
Well now -- let's see.
929
00:35:11,317 --> 00:35:12,357
Tony...
930
00:35:12,443 --> 00:35:16,283
Oh -- oh,
931
00:35:19,534 --> 00:35:24,164
Tony it seems that Santa is
932
00:35:24,247 --> 00:35:27,707
short one present.
933
00:35:27,792 --> 00:35:28,882
It's back at the north pole.
934
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:30,210
That's where your present is.
935
00:35:30,294 --> 00:35:31,384
Now look, I'll run back.
936
00:35:31,462 --> 00:35:32,712
I'll get it.
937
00:35:32,797 --> 00:35:34,047
And -- I'll have it in your
938
00:35:34,132 --> 00:35:35,382
cabin first thing in the
939
00:35:35,466 --> 00:35:39,176
morning.
940
00:35:39,262 --> 00:35:40,932
Tony...
941
00:35:46,936 --> 00:35:47,896
Oh, no.
942
00:35:47,979 --> 00:35:51,649
Poor captain stubing.
943
00:36:14,881 --> 00:36:19,761
San Quentin never had a view
like that one.
944
00:36:19,844 --> 00:36:21,224
Dan, my boy!
945
00:36:21,304 --> 00:36:22,684
Well, I've been lookin' all over
946
00:36:22,763 --> 00:36:23,763
for you.
947
00:36:23,848 --> 00:36:24,808
Really?
948
00:36:24,891 --> 00:36:27,771
Out in the ocean?
949
00:36:27,852 --> 00:36:28,692
Hey, you always were a
950
00:36:28,769 --> 00:36:33,269
great kidder.
951
00:36:33,357 --> 00:36:36,277
I'm not kidding now, Walt.
952
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:40,240
Hey, wait a minute.
953
00:36:40,323 --> 00:36:43,203
Hey, don't do anything foolish.
954
00:36:43,284 --> 00:36:44,164
I've already done something
955
00:36:44,243 --> 00:36:45,493
foolish.
956
00:36:45,578 --> 00:36:47,498
I served three years in prison
957
00:36:47,580 --> 00:36:52,290
for something you did, buddy.
958
00:36:52,376 --> 00:36:53,586
Dan, you-you've gotta believe
me.
959
00:36:53,669 --> 00:36:55,959
I didn't want it to happen.
960
00:36:56,047 --> 00:36:58,167
It wasn't my fault.
961
00:36:58,257 --> 00:37:00,637
I took the money, I admit it.
962
00:37:00,718 --> 00:37:01,338
I was in trouble in the market.
963
00:37:01,427 --> 00:37:02,007
It was serious trouble.
964
00:37:02,094 --> 00:37:03,474
And I really needed that money
965
00:37:03,554 --> 00:37:05,514
desperately.
966
00:37:05,598 --> 00:37:06,808
You set me up.
967
00:37:06,891 --> 00:37:09,691
No, I swear I didn't.
968
00:37:09,769 --> 00:37:10,649
Oh look, Dan, I never thought
969
00:37:10,728 --> 00:37:12,098
that you'd be convicted.
970
00:37:12,188 --> 00:37:12,768
I always thought I could win you
971
00:37:12,855 --> 00:37:13,725
an acquittal, and that way no
972
00:37:13,814 --> 00:37:17,154
one would be hurt.
973
00:37:17,234 --> 00:37:20,154
Somebody was hurt, Walt.
974
00:37:20,237 --> 00:37:22,197
Dan,please...
975
00:37:26,410 --> 00:37:27,750
Please?
976
00:37:57,942 --> 00:37:59,612
Merry Christmas.
977
00:38:01,696 --> 00:38:12,496
Dan?
978
00:38:12,581 --> 00:38:13,541
Goodnight, everybody.
979
00:38:13,624 --> 00:38:17,344
Merry Christmas.
980
00:38:17,420 --> 00:38:20,090
Bye.
981
00:38:20,172 --> 00:38:21,722
Father, did you find Tony yet?
982
00:38:21,799 --> 00:38:22,549
Not yet.
983
00:38:22,633 --> 00:38:23,343
Oh.
984
00:38:23,426 --> 00:38:23,926
Well, we'll help you look for
him.
985
00:38:24,010 --> 00:38:24,590
Okay?
986
00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:25,387
Thanks.
987
00:38:25,469 --> 00:38:26,969
Yeah.
988
00:38:37,648 --> 00:38:39,358
Tony?
989
00:38:45,322 --> 00:38:47,372
Where are you?
990
00:39:02,506 --> 00:39:03,546
Tony?
991
00:39:03,632 --> 00:39:04,592
Go away!
992
00:39:04,675 --> 00:39:06,925
You blew it!
993
00:39:07,011 --> 00:39:07,971
Yes.
994
00:39:08,054 --> 00:39:10,514
Yes, I did.
995
00:39:10,598 --> 00:39:13,558
I apologize.
996
00:39:13,642 --> 00:39:14,852
Come here.
997
00:39:18,856 --> 00:39:21,316
This is for you.
998
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:22,440
Honest?
999
00:39:22,526 --> 00:39:22,776
Uh-huh.
1000
00:39:22,860 --> 00:39:26,160
Gee, thanks!
1001
00:39:26,238 --> 00:39:27,068
It's the football I asked
1002
00:39:27,156 --> 00:39:28,946
for, isn't it?
1003
00:39:29,033 --> 00:39:30,083
No.
1004
00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:31,789
No, I'm sorry, it's not.
1005
00:39:31,869 --> 00:39:34,119
Uh,
1006
00:39:34,205 --> 00:39:34,995
it's a sextant.
1007
00:39:35,081 --> 00:39:37,831
It's an instrument they use to
1008
00:39:37,917 --> 00:39:40,627
navigate the ship.
1009
00:39:40,711 --> 00:39:42,631
It belonged to the captain and
1010
00:39:42,713 --> 00:39:46,133
his father before him.
1011
00:39:46,217 --> 00:39:47,177
See?
1012
00:39:47,259 --> 00:39:51,599
You put in there.
1013
00:39:51,680 --> 00:39:54,980
By holding it up to the stars,
1014
00:39:55,059 --> 00:39:56,639
they could always tell where
1015
00:39:56,727 --> 00:40:00,147
they were going.
1016
00:40:00,231 --> 00:40:01,481
The captain used it in the
1017
00:40:01,565 --> 00:40:05,105
second world war.
1018
00:40:05,194 --> 00:40:08,034
I know it's kinda beat up but,
1019
00:40:08,114 --> 00:40:11,874
this sextant means a lot to him.
1020
00:40:11,951 --> 00:40:16,711
He wants you to have it.
1021
00:40:16,789 --> 00:40:17,499
I'm sorry it's not what you
1022
00:40:17,581 --> 00:40:21,461
asked for.
1023
00:40:21,544 --> 00:40:22,844
Sometimes we don't get what we
1024
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:24,840
want for Christmas.
1025
00:40:24,922 --> 00:40:26,172
No.
1026
00:40:26,257 --> 00:40:27,507
I used to ask for parents, but I
1027
00:40:27,591 --> 00:40:30,801
never got 'em.
1028
00:40:30,886 --> 00:40:32,466
Well, that's,2
1029
00:40:32,555 --> 00:40:35,675
a big order, for Santa to fill.
1030
00:40:35,766 --> 00:40:36,846
It don't matter.
1031
00:40:36,934 --> 00:40:38,854
I don't need a family.
1032
00:40:38,936 --> 00:40:41,516
I got a real big one with father
1033
00:40:41,605 --> 00:40:44,275
Mike and the guys.
1034
00:40:46,527 --> 00:40:49,197
Yeah.
1035
00:40:49,280 --> 00:40:50,320
It's neat.
1036
00:40:50,406 --> 00:40:54,696
Wait'll I show the guys!
1037
00:40:54,785 --> 00:40:55,735
Thanks, captain.
1038
00:40:55,828 --> 00:40:58,458
I mean, Santa.
1039
00:41:13,471 --> 00:41:14,431
We're home.
1040
00:41:14,513 --> 00:41:15,183
You can take off your lampshade
1041
00:41:15,264 --> 00:41:17,894
now.
1042
00:41:17,975 --> 00:41:19,225
Is that all you bought?
1043
00:41:19,310 --> 00:41:20,060
Why didn't you fill the whole
1044
00:41:20,144 --> 00:41:20,734
room?
1045
00:41:20,811 --> 00:41:21,851
I couldn't.
1046
00:41:21,937 --> 00:41:23,017
Your credit card broke.
1047
00:41:23,105 --> 00:41:24,395
That means I'll have to
1048
00:41:24,481 --> 00:41:27,111
pay cash for my lampshades.
1049
00:41:27,193 --> 00:41:28,403
This is just the start.
1050
00:41:28,485 --> 00:41:29,565
Because I'm gonna buy all new
1051
00:41:29,653 --> 00:41:30,863
furniture for the living room.
1052
00:41:30,946 --> 00:41:32,236
Then I'll buy matching
1053
00:41:32,323 --> 00:41:33,573
whoopie cushions.
1054
00:41:33,657 --> 00:41:35,197
And a brand new rolls Royce.
1055
00:41:35,284 --> 00:41:36,914
Okay, then every morning
1056
00:41:36,994 --> 00:41:37,624
I'll go down to the office in a
1057
00:41:37,703 --> 00:41:41,753
clown suit.
1058
00:41:41,832 --> 00:41:42,922
You know something?
1059
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:44,040
No, what?
1060
00:41:44,126 --> 00:41:45,286
You're funny.
1061
00:41:45,377 --> 00:41:46,747
You know something?
1062
00:41:46,837 --> 00:41:49,917
You're very beautiful.
1063
00:41:50,007 --> 00:41:51,877
Aw, put on your lampshade
1064
00:41:51,967 --> 00:41:55,677
and give me a kiss.
1065
00:42:15,908 --> 00:42:17,868
All: Merry Christmas, captain.
1066
00:42:19,870 --> 00:42:20,450
What?
1067
00:42:20,538 --> 00:42:22,708
What is this?
1068
00:42:22,790 --> 00:42:24,380
Well, frankly, captain, we
1069
00:42:24,458 --> 00:42:25,788
were feeling kind of sorry for
1070
00:42:25,876 --> 00:42:26,836
ourselves.
1071
00:42:26,919 --> 00:42:28,629
Oh, you know, sir.
1072
00:42:28,712 --> 00:42:29,302
I mean, it's fun to spend
1073
00:42:29,380 --> 00:42:30,630
Christmas with the passengers,
1074
00:42:30,714 --> 00:42:32,804
but -- it's not the same as
1075
00:42:32,883 --> 00:42:36,183
spending it with your family.
1076
00:42:36,262 --> 00:42:37,972
And then we got to thinking,
1077
00:42:38,055 --> 00:42:38,635
well we don't just
1078
00:42:38,722 --> 00:42:42,812
have one family, we've got two.
1079
00:42:42,893 --> 00:42:44,443
And -- well, you're not
1080
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:46,480
just the captain to us, sir.
1081
00:42:46,563 --> 00:42:48,823
You're the head of the family.
1082
00:42:48,899 --> 00:42:49,859
Our family.
1083
00:42:49,942 --> 00:42:51,322
And why shouldn't our
1084
00:42:51,402 --> 00:42:54,612
family spend Christmas together?
1085
00:42:58,867 --> 00:43:01,157
You see,
1086
00:43:01,245 --> 00:43:04,495
sometimes we try too hard to,
1087
00:43:04,581 --> 00:43:07,381
get what,we've had all along.
1088
00:43:16,385 --> 00:43:19,045
I,i think that i'm
1089
00:43:19,138 --> 00:43:22,518
allergic to this beard.
1090
00:43:25,769 --> 00:43:27,559
I want to say something to all
1091
00:43:27,646 --> 00:43:29,686
of you.
1092
00:43:29,773 --> 00:43:31,823
I'm proud to have you on my
1093
00:43:31,900 --> 00:43:34,990
crew.
1094
00:43:35,070 --> 00:43:37,870
I'm even prouder,
1095
00:43:37,948 --> 00:43:41,868
to count you among my friends.
1096
00:43:41,952 --> 00:43:43,582
Oh, this darn beard.
1097
00:43:43,662 --> 00:43:46,372
Sir,this is for you.
1098
00:43:46,457 --> 00:43:49,537
It's from all of us.
1099
00:43:49,626 --> 00:43:52,046
I -- I thought we had a
1100
00:43:52,129 --> 00:43:53,089
rule that we'd never exchange
1101
00:43:53,172 --> 00:43:54,212
Christmas presents.
1102
00:43:54,298 --> 00:43:55,008
Oh, sir, we thought just
1103
00:43:55,090 --> 00:43:56,050
this once.
1104
00:43:56,133 --> 00:44:01,183
A rule is a rule, Mr. Smith.
1105
00:44:01,263 --> 00:44:05,643
But sometimes rules were made
1106
00:44:05,726 --> 00:44:10,106
to be broken.
1107
00:44:10,189 --> 00:44:12,069
Merry Christmas!
1108
00:44:12,149 --> 00:44:13,569
Why, thank you, sir.
1109
00:44:13,650 --> 00:44:14,030
Merry Christmas.
1110
00:44:14,109 --> 00:44:17,699
Thank you, sir.
1111
00:44:47,684 --> 00:44:49,064
Come on, everybody.
1112
00:44:49,144 --> 00:45:01,454
(Passengers sing 'Noel.')
1113
00:45:07,413 --> 00:45:08,503
Very beautiful, mrs.Baynes.
1114
00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:10,750
Thank you very much.
1115
00:45:10,833 --> 00:45:12,793
Oh boy, I can taste that
1116
00:45:12,876 --> 00:45:13,836
Turkey already.
1117
00:45:13,919 --> 00:45:15,629
Didn't you tell him?
1118
00:45:15,712 --> 00:45:17,632
Oh, the captain said there might
1119
00:45:17,714 --> 00:45:18,264
be some rain and he wondered if
1120
00:45:18,340 --> 00:45:20,010
you'd mind going topside and
1121
00:45:20,092 --> 00:45:20,972
changing the regular flags for
1122
00:45:21,051 --> 00:45:22,931
the rubber flags.
1123
00:45:27,182 --> 00:45:28,732
Rubber flags?
1124
00:45:34,815 --> 00:45:38,315
Good evening.
1125
00:45:38,402 --> 00:45:39,362
There's the captain's table,
1126
00:45:39,445 --> 00:45:41,815
over there.
1127
00:45:41,905 --> 00:45:44,315
Dan!
1128
00:45:44,408 --> 00:45:45,778
Get lost, Perry.
1129
00:45:45,868 --> 00:45:46,578
I've gotta talk to you.
1130
00:45:46,660 --> 00:45:47,830
Honey...
1131
00:45:47,911 --> 00:45:49,371
It's all right, sweetheart.
1132
00:45:49,455 --> 00:45:50,405
Now look, you've done everything
1133
00:45:50,497 --> 00:45:51,497
you can do.
1134
00:45:51,582 --> 00:45:53,542
And just stay away from me.
1135
00:45:53,625 --> 00:45:55,165
Keep outta my life.
1136
00:45:55,252 --> 00:45:56,802
Dan listen, you gave me a
1137
00:45:56,879 --> 00:45:59,469
gift last night,my life.
1138
00:45:59,548 --> 00:46:00,048
Now, I wanna give you something
1139
00:46:00,132 --> 00:46:04,222
in return.
1140
00:46:04,303 --> 00:46:05,853
I,I've contacted the
1141
00:46:05,929 --> 00:46:08,679
police in Los Angeles.
1142
00:46:08,765 --> 00:46:09,475
When we get back I'm gonna turn
1143
00:46:09,558 --> 00:46:11,188
myself in,
1144
00:46:11,268 --> 00:46:14,018
make a full confession.
1145
00:46:14,104 --> 00:46:17,194
And -- I also wrote to the state
1146
00:46:17,274 --> 00:46:19,404
bar commission.
1147
00:46:19,485 --> 00:46:20,065
You'll be practicing law again
1148
00:46:20,152 --> 00:46:21,322
very soon.
1149
00:46:25,282 --> 00:46:29,412
Walt, thank you.
1150
00:46:29,495 --> 00:46:31,655
Merry Christmas, Dan.
1151
00:46:34,917 --> 00:46:36,877
Merry Christmas.
1152
00:46:42,132 --> 00:46:43,092
Good evening.
1153
00:46:43,175 --> 00:46:44,215
Good evening.
1154
00:46:44,301 --> 00:46:44,891
Merry Christmas.
1155
00:46:44,968 --> 00:46:45,388
Good evening.
1156
00:46:45,469 --> 00:46:46,469
Hi.
1157
00:46:46,553 --> 00:46:47,553
Beautiful dress.
1158
00:46:47,638 --> 00:46:49,808
Thank you.
1159
00:46:52,059 --> 00:46:54,899
It's a beautiful table.
1160
00:46:54,978 --> 00:46:57,018
It's a beautiful life.
1161
00:46:57,105 --> 00:46:58,225
Father lewicki, some of the
1162
00:46:58,315 --> 00:46:59,935
guys collected some stuff you
1163
00:47:00,025 --> 00:47:01,735
might like at the orphanage.
1164
00:47:01,818 --> 00:47:02,778
Sports equipment, books, stuff
1165
00:47:02,861 --> 00:47:03,901
like that...
1166
00:47:03,987 --> 00:47:04,947
All right!
1167
00:47:05,030 --> 00:47:06,070
Wow!
1168
00:47:06,156 --> 00:47:07,566
We'd love it...
1169
00:47:07,658 --> 00:47:08,698
Thanks.
1170
00:47:08,784 --> 00:47:09,794
Well, where do we send it,
father.
1171
00:47:09,868 --> 00:47:11,078
Give it to the captain.
1172
00:47:11,161 --> 00:47:12,081
He can bring it when he comes
1173
00:47:12,162 --> 00:47:14,002
next time.
1174
00:47:14,081 --> 00:47:15,081
Captain stubing?
1175
00:47:15,165 --> 00:47:16,035
Yes.
1176
00:47:16,124 --> 00:47:17,214
He comes every month.
1177
00:47:17,292 --> 00:47:19,212
No, he-he must have me confused
1178
00:47:19,294 --> 00:47:21,634
with some other captain.
1179
00:47:21,713 --> 00:47:22,763
You're crazy.
1180
00:47:22,839 --> 00:47:23,589
He took us to the ballgame last
1181
00:47:23,674 --> 00:47:26,434
month.
1182
00:47:26,510 --> 00:47:27,760
Captain, you wouldn't
1183
00:47:27,844 --> 00:47:28,764
have anything to do with that
1184
00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:30,256
mysterious man who's been
1185
00:47:30,347 --> 00:47:31,557
sending these kids on a cruise
1186
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,770
every year, would you?
1187
00:47:33,850 --> 00:47:34,770
You know, the one with 'more
1188
00:47:34,851 --> 00:47:38,611
dollars than sense'?
1189
00:47:38,689 --> 00:47:39,729
Bah!
1190
00:47:39,815 --> 00:47:41,065
Humbug!
1191
00:47:41,149 --> 00:47:42,359
Come on, let's eat ourselves a
1192
00:47:42,442 --> 00:47:44,702
Turkey.
1193
00:47:59,376 --> 00:48:00,206
Hey, thank you for a
1194
00:48:00,294 --> 00:48:00,754
wonderful trip.
1195
00:48:00,836 --> 00:48:01,296
Oh.
1196
00:48:01,378 --> 00:48:02,958
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
1197
00:48:03,046 --> 00:48:03,506
I'll say one thing for you,
1198
00:48:03,589 --> 00:48:04,459
mr.barton
1199
00:48:04,548 --> 00:48:05,628
you sure seem a lot happier than
1200
00:48:05,716 --> 00:48:06,796
when you came aboard.
1201
00:48:06,884 --> 00:48:08,804
You bet I am.
1202
00:48:08,885 --> 00:48:09,635
You know what today is?
1203
00:48:09,720 --> 00:48:10,300
Yes, sir.
1204
00:48:10,387 --> 00:48:10,927
Monday.
1205
00:48:11,013 --> 00:48:11,973
Nope.
1206
00:48:12,055 --> 00:48:15,555
Today is the first day,
1207
00:48:15,642 --> 00:48:16,692
of the rest of my life.
1208
00:48:16,768 --> 00:48:17,598
'Bye.
1209
00:48:17,686 --> 00:48:18,436
Bye-bye.
1210
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:19,770
Bye-bye.
1211
00:48:19,855 --> 00:48:21,475
Oh, darling, I'm so happy.
1212
00:48:21,565 --> 00:48:22,815
Me, too.
1213
00:48:22,899 --> 00:48:24,859
I've got a confession to make.
1214
00:48:24,943 --> 00:48:26,073
When I came on this cruise I --
1215
00:48:26,153 --> 00:48:26,993
I was hoping you'd ask me for a
1216
00:48:27,070 --> 00:48:28,030
divorce.
1217
00:48:28,113 --> 00:48:29,993
Really?
1218
00:48:30,073 --> 00:48:31,033
Well, I has hoping the same
1219
00:48:31,116 --> 00:48:32,326
thing.
1220
00:48:32,409 --> 00:48:33,449
You're kidding?
1221
00:48:33,535 --> 00:48:34,995
This cruise really changed us.
1222
00:48:35,078 --> 00:48:36,038
Yes.
1223
00:48:36,121 --> 00:48:37,621
We're two completely different
1224
00:48:37,706 --> 00:48:38,666
people now.
1225
00:48:38,749 --> 00:48:50,839
(Singing scales)
1226
00:48:50,927 --> 00:48:51,637
Thanks for everything,
1227
00:48:51,720 --> 00:48:52,680
captain.
1228
00:48:52,763 --> 00:48:53,853
We had a good time.
1229
00:48:53,930 --> 00:48:54,970
Here.
1230
00:48:55,057 --> 00:48:56,017
From us kids.
1231
00:48:56,099 --> 00:48:58,479
Thanks for uh -- the trip.
1232
00:48:58,560 --> 00:49:00,810
Champagne?
1233
00:49:00,896 --> 00:49:01,856
Now, how did you kids get your
1234
00:49:01,938 --> 00:49:02,518
hands on this bottle of
1235
00:49:02,606 --> 00:49:03,856
champagne?
1236
00:49:03,940 --> 00:49:04,650
Where there's a will,
1237
00:49:04,733 --> 00:49:09,863
there's a way.
1238
00:49:09,946 --> 00:49:16,906
Let's go, you guys.
1239
00:49:16,995 --> 00:49:17,825
I guess that's will on the
1240
00:49:17,913 --> 00:49:20,923
bottom and way on top.
1241
00:49:20,973 --> 00:49:25,523
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