Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:10,377
♪ ♪
2
00:00:12,111 --> 00:00:13,751
Arliss (narrating):
For most of us,
3
00:00:13,813 --> 00:00:15,983
the dream of
becoming a champion,
4
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:18,349
remains a fantasy,
5
00:00:18,418 --> 00:00:20,488
but for a special few,
6
00:00:20,553 --> 00:00:23,023
it is very much a reality.
7
00:00:23,089 --> 00:00:24,419
We cheer them,
8
00:00:24,491 --> 00:00:26,361
we live through them.
9
00:00:26,426 --> 00:00:29,426
Athletes are our last warriors.
10
00:00:29,496 --> 00:00:32,726
My job is to make
their dreams come true.
11
00:00:32,799 --> 00:00:34,229
(water splashing)
12
00:00:34,300 --> 00:00:36,270
My name is Arliss Michaels,
13
00:00:36,336 --> 00:00:38,706
I represent athletes,
14
00:00:38,771 --> 00:00:39,971
these are my stories.
15
00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:43,009
♪ Don't know what it is
that makes me love you so ♪
16
00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:47,006
♪ I only know I never
wanna let you go ♪
17
00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:50,680
♪ 'Cause you started
something oh, can't you see ♪
18
00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:54,290
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
19
00:00:54,354 --> 00:00:57,894
♪ It happens to be true ♪
20
00:00:57,957 --> 00:01:01,457
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
21
00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:05,198
♪ I just wanna be
beside you everywhere ♪
22
00:01:05,265 --> 00:01:08,665
♪ As long as we're
together, honey, I don't care ♪
23
00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:12,335
♪ 'Cause you started
something oh, can't you see ♪
24
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:15,805
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
25
00:01:15,875 --> 00:01:19,975
♪ No matter what you do ♪
26
00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:23,546
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
27
00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:31,321
Theirs are the best
cherry popovers in the city.
28
00:01:31,391 --> 00:01:33,061
Remember back in New Haven?
29
00:01:33,126 --> 00:01:34,986
Oh, the old waistline
30
00:01:35,061 --> 00:01:37,161
has expanded quite a
bit since New Haven.
31
00:01:37,230 --> 00:01:38,570
Too rich for my blood.
32
00:01:38,631 --> 00:01:41,101
Shall I procure for us a
bottle of champagne, Stanley,
33
00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:43,067
perhaps Dom '85?
34
00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:44,496
With breakfast?
35
00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:46,571
Well, it is my ardent hope
36
00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:49,339
that you and I will have
something to celebrate this morning.
37
00:01:49,409 --> 00:01:52,849
Well, I thought about
your job offer, Alvin,
38
00:01:52,912 --> 00:01:54,912
- I thought about it a lot.
- And?
39
00:01:56,115 --> 00:01:58,915
And I wrote a
letter of resignation
40
00:01:58,985 --> 00:02:00,485
to Arliss.
41
00:02:00,553 --> 00:02:02,893
That's splendid!
42
00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:05,886
I never gave it to him, though.
43
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:07,529
I see.
44
00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:11,196
Please understand.
45
00:02:11,264 --> 00:02:13,204
I'm flattered, you
have a terrific agency.
46
00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,226
You represent a
lot of great athletes.
47
00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:16,771
Great black athletes.
48
00:02:16,836 --> 00:02:19,566
But Arliss has been
very good to me.
49
00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:21,109
Arliss Michaels
50
00:02:21,174 --> 00:02:22,984
reaps millions of
dollars in commissions
51
00:02:23,042 --> 00:02:24,482
from the sweat of our brothers,
52
00:02:24,544 --> 00:02:28,214
magnificent black
warriors of sport.
53
00:02:28,281 --> 00:02:30,521
But when it comes time
to share these spoils
54
00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:32,753
with the brother who works
for him day in, day out...
55
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:34,189
Alvin, please,
56
00:02:34,253 --> 00:02:36,193
this is me, not "Nightline."
57
00:02:38,157 --> 00:02:39,527
(chuckling)
58
00:02:39,592 --> 00:02:41,162
Okay.
59
00:02:41,227 --> 00:02:43,257
All I'm saying, Stanley,
60
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:45,399
is you've got to go
where you're appreciated.
61
00:02:45,465 --> 00:02:47,795
Arliss takes you for granted.
62
00:02:47,867 --> 00:02:50,297
He doesn't really listen to you
63
00:02:50,370 --> 00:02:51,940
when you talk, the way I would.
64
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:55,105
Arliss appreciates
me in his own way.
65
00:02:55,174 --> 00:02:58,654
So, I can assume he's
offered you stock options,
66
00:02:58,711 --> 00:03:02,751
increased your areas of
responsibility and autonomy,
67
00:03:02,815 --> 00:03:06,285
promised to make you
a partner in 24 months.
68
00:03:06,352 --> 00:03:09,592
All the things
I've offered to do?
69
00:03:11,457 --> 00:03:13,327
Well, as they used to say
70
00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:15,833
on "Monday Night Football":
71
00:03:15,895 --> 00:03:18,025
"You make the call."
72
00:03:19,465 --> 00:03:21,825
Arliss (narrating): I'm always
asked, what is it about me
73
00:03:21,901 --> 00:03:23,741
that inspires loyalty
among my people?
74
00:03:23,803 --> 00:03:25,843
Coffee?
75
00:03:25,905 --> 00:03:29,005
Two things:
Communication and patience.
76
00:03:29,075 --> 00:03:30,835
I'll get you to the airport
77
00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:33,010
in 12 minutes
flat, Mr. Michaels.
78
00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:34,509
Unless you're anal
about red lights.
79
00:03:34,580 --> 00:03:36,280
I just gotta get my
briefcase upstairs
80
00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:37,549
and we're outta here!
81
00:03:37,617 --> 00:03:38,757
Arliss, I've been
looking for you.
82
00:03:38,785 --> 00:03:40,145
It's Skip, Skip Lewis!
83
00:03:40,219 --> 00:03:41,659
Oh, yeah, yeah! How
you doing, buddy?
84
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:43,088
- Got a second?
- Actually, I don't.
85
00:03:43,122 --> 00:03:45,632
Great! The thing is I was hoping
you can get me Wayne Gretzky
86
00:03:45,692 --> 00:03:48,742
to sit on the dais for this black-tie
thing I'm throwing for tourette's research.
87
00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:50,961
You know, "shit, piss,
fuck!" Those guys?
88
00:03:51,030 --> 00:03:53,710
Wonderful cause! Wonderful! Let
me get back to you on that, okay, Skip?
89
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:56,073
I also do fundraising
for Deaf Children USA.
90
00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:57,935
I've written a fundraising song.
91
00:03:58,004 --> 00:03:59,424
Sort of a "We Are
the World" type thing.
92
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,549
We're cutting it next week,
everybody's gonna be there.
93
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:02,914
Great!
94
00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:04,240
Lainie Kazan, Jack Jones.
95
00:04:04,310 --> 00:04:05,330
He's good.
96
00:04:05,329 --> 00:04:06,349
The Beach Boys.
97
00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:09,022
Arliss (narrating): I'm only too
happy to listen to every idea,
98
00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:10,582
big and small.
99
00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:12,150
Cassidy, Sinatra.
100
00:04:12,218 --> 00:04:13,948
Well, not senior, God bless him,
101
00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:15,860
but junior who I
think's even better.
102
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,362
You name it, they're
gonna be there...
103
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,634
Arliss (narrating): Because
for every 100 bad ideas,
104
00:04:20,693 --> 00:04:22,863
there might be one good one.
105
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:28,031
♪ They're the kids who hear
bad but they don't feel sad ♪
106
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,801
That's very catchy. Very catchy.
107
00:04:29,869 --> 00:04:32,639
♪ They're the kids who hear
bad but they don't feel sad ♪
108
00:04:32,705 --> 00:04:34,805
♪ They cannot hear,
but they can listen ♪
109
00:04:34,874 --> 00:04:37,124
Skip, it is good seeing you,
Good seeing you. God bless you.
110
00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:39,413
God, this place is awesome!
111
00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:41,179
Didn't think you were
gonna be here today.
112
00:04:41,247 --> 00:04:43,317
Who's here? I am not here.
113
00:04:43,382 --> 00:04:46,322
What you see... hologram.
This is a hologram.
114
00:04:46,385 --> 00:04:48,185
By the way, give a
picture of Skip Lewis
115
00:04:48,254 --> 00:04:49,524
to the guard desk downstairs.
116
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:54,328
Kirby: Yo, Brett Favre,
yeah, we're all set.
117
00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:58,896
Why don't you meet
me in Arliss' office
118
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:00,125
in about an hour?
119
00:05:00,199 --> 00:05:01,199
I'm confused, Kirby,
120
00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:03,244
is this your thing or does
Arliss want me to do it?
121
00:05:03,302 --> 00:05:06,042
No, Brett! No, no,
this is his whole thing.
122
00:05:06,105 --> 00:05:08,835
It's just that he's delegated
complete autonomy to me.
123
00:05:08,908 --> 00:05:09,908
Right.
124
00:05:09,942 --> 00:05:11,112
Bye!
125
00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:13,147
Hi, boss, I was
just cleaning up.
126
00:05:13,212 --> 00:05:14,512
I didn't expect to see you.
127
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:16,350
- Obviously not.
- Your trip off?
128
00:05:16,415 --> 00:05:18,045
Trip is a go.
129
00:05:18,117 --> 00:05:19,687
I just spoke to Captain Scott.
130
00:05:19,752 --> 00:05:21,692
Wheels are up in...
131
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:23,664
77 minutes.
132
00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:26,033
Great, great, 'cause
you deserve it!
133
00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:27,392
Later.
134
00:05:29,695 --> 00:05:31,855
So what's this secret
trip you're taking?
135
00:05:31,931 --> 00:05:33,571
Can I trust you?
136
00:05:33,633 --> 00:05:34,873
Of course you can.
137
00:05:34,934 --> 00:05:37,004
Okay, it's a trip,
and it's secret!
138
00:05:37,069 --> 00:05:38,939
Get outta here!
139
00:05:41,908 --> 00:05:43,608
(phone dialing)
140
00:05:45,344 --> 00:05:46,854
Hi, it's Arliss Michaels.
141
00:05:46,913 --> 00:05:48,923
Is "Operation:
Closure" still a go?
142
00:05:50,783 --> 00:05:52,553
Good, good, I'm on my way.
143
00:05:52,618 --> 00:05:54,898
Arliss (narrating): I'm as open
and honest with my employees
144
00:05:54,921 --> 00:05:56,121
as they are with me.
145
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,319
Uh, messages.
146
00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:59,430
Your Aunt Rosie
called wanting to know
147
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,532
- how she can get in touch with you.
- Nice try.
148
00:06:01,594 --> 00:06:03,364
- Arliss...
- Arliss is not here!
149
00:06:03,429 --> 00:06:04,899
Do you think you can get Shaq
150
00:06:04,964 --> 00:06:06,604
to do a Pips type thing
in the background?
151
00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:07,972
You know, doo wop, doo wop.
152
00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,404
- Arliss!
- Hologram!
153
00:06:09,468 --> 00:06:11,268
Psycho-gram, it's Sammy Stilton.
154
00:06:11,337 --> 00:06:12,667
I'll call him from the car.
155
00:06:12,738 --> 00:06:14,968
No, he's ranting Code Red!
156
00:06:16,442 --> 00:06:17,442
Shit!
157
00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:18,980
Yes, Sammy, he's right here.
158
00:06:20,179 --> 00:06:22,879
Sammy Stilton, how's the
Svengali of center field?
159
00:06:22,949 --> 00:06:25,419
I'm pissed, Arliss!
Why I gotta call you?
160
00:06:25,484 --> 00:06:27,864
You should be calling me this
morning about all this bullshit!
161
00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:30,657
- What bullshit?
- You're supposed to be my agent, man!
162
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,363
"What bullshit?" Shit!
163
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:34,255
USA Today, fast. Fast, fast!
164
00:06:34,327 --> 00:06:36,457
No, no, no, I said
"What bullshit!"
165
00:06:36,529 --> 00:06:39,039
And it was! In fact, I've never
seen such bullshit in all my life!
166
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,695
What you gonna
do about it, man?!
167
00:06:40,766 --> 00:06:43,046
What am I gonna do about
it? I am on it right as we speak!
168
00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:44,602
They're not gonna
get away with this!
169
00:06:44,670 --> 00:06:45,810
And you can quote me!
170
00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:48,042
My wife watched the tape on
the news this morning, man!
171
00:06:48,107 --> 00:06:49,907
She says it's bullshit too!
172
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:51,276
Huh, baby?
173
00:06:51,344 --> 00:06:52,954
Donna here agrees with her!
174
00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:55,622
Well, they're both right! It
makes me so goddamn mad!
175
00:06:55,681 --> 00:06:58,281
Although, I must say you are
handling it with great dignity!
176
00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:00,521
Aw, man, they're
showing it again on ESPN!
177
00:07:00,586 --> 00:07:02,956
Call me back, Airport Suites!
178
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:04,322
ESPN, quick.
179
00:07:08,227 --> 00:07:11,797
It began innocently enough,
when Sammy "Rumpel" Stilton
180
00:07:11,864 --> 00:07:13,774
appeared to make
a game saving catch
181
00:07:13,833 --> 00:07:15,333
in the bottom of the 16th.
182
00:07:15,401 --> 00:07:18,241
But second base umpire,
Paul Reston begged to differ,
183
00:07:18,304 --> 00:07:19,544
ruling it a "trap."
184
00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,905
He's robbed, he's robbed!
185
00:07:24,310 --> 00:07:26,010
News anchor: That
started fireworks...
186
00:07:28,481 --> 00:07:31,181
Okay, so Sammy got screwed.
But I got 46 baseball clients
187
00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:33,690
who are getting screwed all the
time. What's the big deal here?
188
00:07:34,820 --> 00:07:36,460
(crowd groans)
189
00:07:36,522 --> 00:07:38,362
Umm...
190
00:07:38,424 --> 00:07:39,964
That's probably the big deal.
191
00:07:40,026 --> 00:07:41,936
News Anchor: By the looks
of it, Stilton is getting himself
192
00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:44,431
into a very sticky situation.
193
00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:46,827
And I think we'll see
the biggest suspension
194
00:07:46,899 --> 00:07:50,199
this side of the
Varrazano Narrows bridge.
195
00:07:50,269 --> 00:07:51,669
Ohh.
196
00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:54,942
Oh, shit!
197
00:07:55,007 --> 00:07:57,207
You ready to rock
and roll, Mr. Michaels?
198
00:07:57,276 --> 00:07:59,246
- I'll be with you in just a minute, okay?
- You got it.
199
00:07:59,278 --> 00:08:00,678
You want me to
get the A/C going?
200
00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,546
I can have the back
seat at 72 degrees
201
00:08:02,615 --> 00:08:04,715
- in four minutes flat.
- Yeah, great, whatever.
202
00:08:04,784 --> 00:08:07,494
Look, tell Stanley to come in
with Sammy's latest contract.
203
00:08:07,553 --> 00:08:09,123
Stanley's not here.
204
00:08:09,188 --> 00:08:10,788
Stanley's here.
205
00:08:10,856 --> 00:08:12,656
Great, I need you.
206
00:08:12,725 --> 00:08:14,625
You got me, what's up?
207
00:08:14,694 --> 00:08:16,104
Grab Sammy Stilton's contract.
208
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:18,932
Call me in my car in 30
seconds and read it to me.
209
00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:21,798
That's it? Just read it to you.
210
00:08:21,867 --> 00:08:24,137
That's it, simple stuff.
211
00:08:24,203 --> 00:08:25,503
Thanks.
212
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:26,971
Arliss.
213
00:08:27,039 --> 00:08:28,609
What?
214
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:33,107
This is for you.
215
00:08:36,282 --> 00:08:37,922
What is it?
216
00:08:37,984 --> 00:08:39,824
Nothing, just...
217
00:08:39,885 --> 00:08:41,285
when you get a moment.
218
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:42,394
Sure.
219
00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:45,223
(exhales deeply)
220
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,799
What?!
221
00:08:56,002 --> 00:08:57,342
Quitting?
222
00:08:57,403 --> 00:09:00,113
Did you get to the stuff about how
much I respect and admire you?
223
00:09:00,172 --> 00:09:03,382
How I will always be
grateful to you for your wise...
224
00:09:03,442 --> 00:09:05,542
How could you just stab
me in the back like this?
225
00:09:05,611 --> 00:09:07,851
I've always thought
of us as brothers.
226
00:09:07,913 --> 00:09:10,323
Well, brothers can work
at different companies.
227
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,553
And where's brother
Stanley going to work?
228
00:09:12,618 --> 00:09:14,148
The Alvin Epps Agency.
229
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,220
Epps?!
230
00:09:15,287 --> 00:09:18,417
You're leaving me for Epps?
231
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,231
So this is a
black-white thing, huh?
232
00:09:20,292 --> 00:09:22,802
No! It's a "You don't
listen to me" thing!
233
00:09:22,862 --> 00:09:24,062
I don't listen?!
234
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:25,170
- Well...
- I don't listen!
235
00:09:25,197 --> 00:09:26,897
You think I don't
listen to you?!
236
00:09:26,966 --> 00:09:28,896
Me, Arliss Michaels,
Mr. Attentive!
237
00:09:28,968 --> 00:09:30,768
You hear that? I don't listen!
238
00:09:30,836 --> 00:09:32,166
- Rita: Arliss...
- Later!
239
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:34,408
Stanley, I want
to listen to you.
240
00:09:36,575 --> 00:09:37,685
Right now.
241
00:09:37,694 --> 00:09:38,814
You're making fun of me.
242
00:09:38,878 --> 00:09:40,008
No, I am not.
243
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:41,959
We will order in lunch,
we will order in dinner.
244
00:09:42,014 --> 00:09:44,584
You'll talk, I'll listen.
I'm not going anywhere.
245
00:09:44,650 --> 00:09:46,120
You're going out of town!
246
00:09:46,185 --> 00:09:48,145
That's right, okay.
247
00:09:48,220 --> 00:09:51,140
So, we'll start talking now and then
we'll continue when I come back, okay?
248
00:09:53,025 --> 00:09:55,485
So, tell me all about
Stanley Babson.
249
00:09:55,561 --> 00:09:57,961
His hopes, his dreams,
his goals for the future.
250
00:09:58,030 --> 00:09:59,070
Really?
251
00:09:59,131 --> 00:10:00,571
Really.
252
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:03,843
Well, if you're serious...
253
00:10:06,205 --> 00:10:08,005
Let's begin with
my responsibilities.
254
00:10:08,074 --> 00:10:09,514
I wanna be a part of a place
255
00:10:09,575 --> 00:10:11,305
where I can get a
real opportunity...
256
00:10:11,377 --> 00:10:13,877
Sammy Stilton on two
and he's breathing fire.
257
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,776
I'll call back.
258
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:18,148
Stanley's talking now.
259
00:10:18,217 --> 00:10:20,787
And that's priority number one.
260
00:10:20,853 --> 00:10:23,623
Well, Sammy says if you
don't listen to him right now,
261
00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:25,189
he's gonna find
an agent who will.
262
00:10:32,331 --> 00:10:33,331
Thank you.
263
00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:34,469
I'll be right back.
264
00:10:36,669 --> 00:10:38,399
I think we're off to a
real good start here.
265
00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,471
Mmm...
266
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,140
I know what it is,
Scottsdale, a golf thing.
267
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,709
- You guessed it!
- Fuck you.
268
00:10:48,447 --> 00:10:49,947
Hey, buddy, it's Kirby.
269
00:10:50,015 --> 00:10:51,315
Hey, Kirby.
270
00:10:51,383 --> 00:10:52,853
Just about to head over.
271
00:10:52,918 --> 00:10:55,488
Great, but listen,
a change of plans.
272
00:10:55,554 --> 00:10:57,364
Okay? Yeah. Don't
come to the office.
273
00:10:57,423 --> 00:10:59,933
Arliss is still... just...
274
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:02,232
Just don't come here, okay?
275
00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:04,004
Just meet me there.
276
00:11:04,063 --> 00:11:05,063
Okay, bye.
277
00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:20,682
Lisa Leslie.
278
00:11:20,746 --> 00:11:21,876
Hey, Kirby.
279
00:11:21,947 --> 00:11:24,917
Just the person I
wanted to talk to.
280
00:11:26,418 --> 00:11:28,888
Sammy, I tried to call you
back but the line went dead!
281
00:11:28,954 --> 00:11:30,174
It's been happening
all morning here!
282
00:11:30,189 --> 00:11:32,359
If you ask me, it's
that damn deregulation!
283
00:11:32,424 --> 00:11:33,994
Alright, Arliss,
284
00:11:34,059 --> 00:11:35,699
you've seen the tapes,
what you gonna do about it?
285
00:11:35,728 --> 00:11:38,038
Oh, Sammy, I'll tell you exactly
what I'm gonna do about it.
286
00:11:38,063 --> 00:11:40,373
Arliss?! Hello!
287
00:11:40,432 --> 00:11:41,702
You hung up on him?
288
00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:43,937
No, no, no, we
were disconnected.
289
00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:46,313
Don't worry I'll call him back
in 30 seconds from the car.
290
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:48,212
But I have got
to get out of here.
291
00:11:48,274 --> 00:11:49,584
What's happening with Stanley?
292
00:11:51,477 --> 00:11:52,817
Stanley (on intercom):
Stanley Babson.
293
00:11:52,845 --> 00:11:54,085
Stanley, meet with
me at the elevator.
294
00:11:54,113 --> 00:11:55,993
We'll ride down together,
we'll talk in the car.
295
00:11:56,015 --> 00:11:57,275
Look, if you're too busy...
296
00:11:57,349 --> 00:11:59,149
No, no, no, I'm never
too busy for you!
297
00:11:59,218 --> 00:12:00,428
That's the perfect
place, the car.
298
00:12:00,452 --> 00:12:02,922
No distractions! I'm be able
to focus on Stanley Babson!
299
00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:07,028
Okay, the elevator,
I'll be right there.
300
00:12:07,092 --> 00:12:08,842
What is this all about?
Is he getting a raise?
301
00:12:08,861 --> 00:12:10,471
Cause if he gets a
raise, I should get a raise.
302
00:12:10,496 --> 00:12:12,606
- I worked here two years longer than him.
- Not now! Not now!
303
00:12:12,631 --> 00:12:14,701
Not only that, you never
took me to "Riverdance"!
304
00:12:14,767 --> 00:12:17,667
♪ Deaf kids USA, all the way ♪
305
00:12:17,736 --> 00:12:19,666
Hey! Great, great.
306
00:12:19,738 --> 00:12:22,008
The kids are gonna be thrilled.
307
00:12:22,074 --> 00:12:23,244
Arliss...
308
00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:24,439
Lisa Leslie,
309
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:26,110
how's the first lady of lay-ups?
310
00:12:26,178 --> 00:12:28,218
I have a problem with this
Nike commercial Saturday.
311
00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:29,480
Problem, what problem?
312
00:12:29,548 --> 00:12:31,748
NBC wants me to do
the Laker playoff game
313
00:12:31,817 --> 00:12:32,947
on the same day.
314
00:12:33,018 --> 00:12:34,548
We have to talk now.
315
00:12:34,620 --> 00:12:35,920
Sure, sure.
316
00:12:35,988 --> 00:12:37,628
Why don't you come
with me to the airport.
317
00:12:37,656 --> 00:12:39,386
I'll bring Stanley,
we'll solve this thing.
318
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:41,928
And what's this kid's clinic
Kirby has me doing next week?
319
00:12:41,994 --> 00:12:42,994
Kid's clinic?
320
00:12:43,028 --> 00:12:44,828
Rita: Arliss, a fax
just came in for you!
321
00:12:44,897 --> 00:12:46,097
Arliss doesn't exist!
322
00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:48,995
No, no, no, it's urgent, it's
from the American League.
323
00:12:53,005 --> 00:12:55,535
Get me the Player's Association.
324
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:57,508
Lisa, I'll meet
you at the elevator
325
00:12:57,576 --> 00:12:59,676
in two shakes of a lamb's tail.
326
00:13:01,513 --> 00:13:04,953
So, Brett, don't really ask him
for a beer or anything like that,
327
00:13:05,017 --> 00:13:07,247
'cause they're like Saudi
Arabian, you know, royalty,
328
00:13:07,319 --> 00:13:08,469
or something like that.
329
00:13:08,472 --> 00:13:09,622
Saudi Arabia?
330
00:13:09,688 --> 00:13:11,088
What's going on, Kirby?
331
00:13:11,156 --> 00:13:13,026
I thought you told me
I was donating my time
332
00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:14,432
for a kid's clinic.
333
00:13:14,493 --> 00:13:17,203
No, "kid" clinic, kid clinic.
334
00:13:17,263 --> 00:13:18,803
And there's the kid, hey!
335
00:13:18,864 --> 00:13:20,574
Hello!
336
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,573
Hey!
337
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,235
Let's go meet him.
338
00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:25,503
Six weeks?!
339
00:13:25,571 --> 00:13:27,611
Donald, you're the head
of the Player's Association.
340
00:13:27,673 --> 00:13:30,413
This is the most unfair
suspension of all time!
341
00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:32,716
I mean, we haven't even heard
Sammy's side of the story yet!
342
00:13:32,745 --> 00:13:34,775
I hear you, Arliss,
but this is a tough one.
343
00:13:34,847 --> 00:13:36,977
Well, that's your job is
to deal with tough ones!
344
00:13:37,049 --> 00:13:39,489
I know it, but just relax,
have the player call me.
345
00:13:40,753 --> 00:13:43,293
Donald: Arliss, are
you there? Arliss?
346
00:13:43,355 --> 00:13:44,915
I spent ten minutes
at the elevator.
347
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,690
Didn't run into you.
348
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:48,229
- Donald: Arliss?
- Donald, hold on.
349
00:13:48,294 --> 00:13:50,004
Stanley, I am so sorry.
350
00:13:50,062 --> 00:13:51,232
This will just take a minute.
351
00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:52,727
I did run into Lisa Leslie.
352
00:13:52,798 --> 00:13:55,368
Solved her schedule conflict
with a phone call to Nike,
353
00:13:55,434 --> 00:13:57,214
which I know exceeds
my authority around here,
354
00:13:57,236 --> 00:13:58,596
but what doesn't?
355
00:13:58,671 --> 00:13:59,711
- Stanley, don't...
- Look.
356
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:02,542
Let's just do this cleanly.
357
00:14:02,608 --> 00:14:04,008
No need to blow smoke up my ass.
358
00:14:04,076 --> 00:14:07,046
Things end, people
move on, no big deal.
359
00:14:07,112 --> 00:14:08,892
- Donald: I'm hanging up now!
- Donald, I'll call you back.
360
00:14:08,914 --> 00:14:10,954
Stanley, Stanley, we'll
talk now. We'll talk now.
361
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,016
Listen to me,
362
00:14:12,051 --> 00:14:14,251
I would never blow
smoke up your ass.
363
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:15,450
You know why?
364
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:18,061
Because you're
too valuable to me.
365
00:14:18,123 --> 00:14:19,933
Who else would you
tell to wait at the elevator
366
00:14:19,958 --> 00:14:21,168
and then forget all about them?
367
00:14:21,193 --> 00:14:22,283
Lisa Leslie.
368
00:14:22,279 --> 00:14:23,359
Okay, bad example.
369
00:14:23,429 --> 00:14:25,369
Who else would still be
doing the same job for you
370
00:14:25,397 --> 00:14:27,267
with no increase
in responsibility
371
00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,073
five years after you hired them?
372
00:14:29,134 --> 00:14:30,574
Rita and Kirby!
373
00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:33,006
Look, I don't take
you for granted!
374
00:14:33,072 --> 00:14:34,512
And to prove it,
375
00:14:34,573 --> 00:14:38,243
I'm gonna make your
paycheck a little bit fatter.
376
00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:39,810
I knew it!
377
00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:42,408
Excuse me, this is a
private conversation.
378
00:14:42,481 --> 00:14:44,221
Oh, fine, and when
you're through,
379
00:14:44,283 --> 00:14:47,523
you and I will have a
private conversation.
380
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:53,560
What the hell are
my bags doing here?
381
00:14:53,625 --> 00:14:55,135
The limo driver left
them at Reception.
382
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:56,860
He said he waited
as long as he could
383
00:14:56,929 --> 00:14:58,239
but he had another
airport run to do.
384
00:14:58,263 --> 00:15:00,133
- What?!
- Don't worry.
385
00:15:00,199 --> 00:15:01,239
They're sending another car.
386
00:15:01,266 --> 00:15:02,736
It should be here any minute.
387
00:15:02,801 --> 00:15:03,981
I don't have time
for another car.
388
00:15:04,002 --> 00:15:05,852
Look, tell Kirby he's gotta
take me to the airport.
389
00:15:05,871 --> 00:15:07,011
Kirby's not here.
390
00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:08,412
Okay, then, you'll take me.
391
00:15:08,474 --> 00:15:11,314
Oh, sorry, I'm taking
allergy medication.
392
00:15:11,377 --> 00:15:13,377
Can't operate heavy machinery.
393
00:15:13,445 --> 00:15:15,205
Especially what you pay me.
394
00:15:18,384 --> 00:15:20,424
Oh, I guess you
want me to take you.
395
00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:22,416
Sort of a "Driving
Mr. Daisy" thing?
396
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,188
Furthest thing from my mind.
397
00:15:24,256 --> 00:15:25,916
I'll get a cab downstairs.
398
00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:27,991
Because you have
important work to do here,
399
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:29,330
fulfilling autonomous work.
400
00:15:29,395 --> 00:15:30,995
Do me a favor, grab this thing.
401
00:15:31,063 --> 00:15:32,473
Arliss, I changed the
ending of the song.
402
00:15:32,498 --> 00:15:33,968
How about "oh" in harmony?
403
00:15:34,032 --> 00:15:35,672
Not now! Not now! Stanley, look.
404
00:15:35,734 --> 00:15:37,074
I'll call you from the plane.
405
00:15:37,136 --> 00:15:38,496
We will talk as
long as you want.
406
00:15:38,570 --> 00:15:41,220
If we're still talking by the time
the plane lands, I won't let it land.
407
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,590
I'll make 'em head out to sea and
fly until the plane runs out of fuel.
408
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:45,239
But I have got
to get out of here.
409
00:15:45,310 --> 00:15:48,250
Look, tell Sammy Stilton I will talk
to him as soon as I get to League.
410
00:15:48,313 --> 00:15:49,483
- Yo, Arliss!
- Sammy!
411
00:15:49,548 --> 00:15:51,148
Look, no more phone calls, man.
412
00:15:51,216 --> 00:15:53,186
We gotta talk face to face
right now! So, come on!
413
00:15:53,252 --> 00:15:55,462
Yeah, yeah. I was just saying
"Where's Sammy?" Wasn't I saying that?
414
00:15:55,487 --> 00:15:57,087
I was saying, "Where's
my friend Sammy?"
415
00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:00,664
Listen Brett, why don't
you show Fahad there
416
00:16:00,726 --> 00:16:04,326
that Brett Favre Super Bowl
special and I'll catch 'em?
417
00:16:06,298 --> 00:16:08,728
See here, grab
the laces right here.
418
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,171
That's what makes it spiral.
419
00:16:11,236 --> 00:16:13,336
Robert Brooks into the stands!
420
00:16:15,574 --> 00:16:17,584
Your son is gonna
remember this moment
421
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,313
the rest of his life.
422
00:16:19,378 --> 00:16:21,608
Worth every penny.
423
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,050
So, what did we say, $50,000?
424
00:16:23,115 --> 00:16:24,645
That is correct.
425
00:16:24,716 --> 00:16:27,986
The same as my golf lesson
with that fuzzy gentleman.
426
00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:29,963
Hey listen,
427
00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:31,862
how would you like
to have Lisa Leslie
428
00:16:31,924 --> 00:16:33,664
teach that pretty
daughter of yours
429
00:16:33,725 --> 00:16:35,625
that pretty jump shot of hers?
430
00:16:35,694 --> 00:16:37,904
- Ah.
- That would be excellent.
431
00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:40,033
Show me, like,
your fastest pass.
432
00:16:40,098 --> 00:16:41,798
Hey, good idea.
433
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:45,167
So, the totals for today and
the basketball lady would be...
434
00:16:45,237 --> 00:16:46,837
No, no, not here, not here!!
435
00:16:46,905 --> 00:16:48,265
(groans)
436
00:16:50,442 --> 00:16:51,642
Six week suspension?!
437
00:16:51,710 --> 00:16:53,810
No, man, they can't do that!
438
00:16:53,879 --> 00:16:55,779
Unfortunately they can.
439
00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:57,148
Now, I'll fight it,
440
00:16:57,216 --> 00:16:58,846
but after this
Alamar spitting thing.
441
00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:00,927
I mean, the Umpire's
Association, they're on the warpath.
442
00:17:00,953 --> 00:17:04,393
"You dumb monkey,
go eat a banana."
443
00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:06,956
- Excuse me?
- That's what the dude said to me, man!
444
00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:08,925
The umpire! He
called me a monkey
445
00:17:08,994 --> 00:17:10,734
and he told me to
go eat a banana!
446
00:17:10,796 --> 00:17:12,796
That's what I've been
trying to tell you, Arliss!
447
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,565
He really said that?
448
00:17:14,633 --> 00:17:15,973
Fuck yeah, man!
449
00:17:16,034 --> 00:17:18,474
I'm telling you! Umpires, they're
going psycho these days, man.
450
00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:19,814
That's a complete breakdown
451
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,182
of moral fucking
authority, right?
452
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:23,076
Did anyone else hear him say it?
453
00:17:23,141 --> 00:17:26,451
No, He leaned in real
close and he said it.
454
00:17:26,512 --> 00:17:28,382
So it's your word against his.
455
00:17:28,447 --> 00:17:29,877
He said it, Arliss!
456
00:17:29,948 --> 00:17:32,348
Look, make him
take a lie detector test!
457
00:17:32,417 --> 00:17:34,047
Just prove he's talking shit!
458
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:36,319
Otherwise I'm gonna
look like a national piss-pot!
459
00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:37,668
Shit!
460
00:17:37,674 --> 00:17:38,964
Look, I believe ya!
461
00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:41,294
But I just gotta find
a way to prove this!
462
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,100
Skip: ♪ But they
don't feel sad ♪
463
00:17:43,161 --> 00:17:45,131
♪ They're the kids
who hear bad ♪
464
00:17:45,197 --> 00:17:47,227
♪ But they don't feel sad ♪
465
00:17:47,299 --> 00:17:49,699
♪ They can't hear,
but they can listen ♪
466
00:17:49,768 --> 00:17:53,508
Stanley, I need your help
with the Sammy Stilton thing.
467
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:55,672
Fine, what file do you need?
468
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,911
Not files, I need you
469
00:17:57,976 --> 00:18:00,176
to meet with me,
Sammy, and Skip Lewis.
470
00:18:00,245 --> 00:18:01,545
Skip Lewis,
471
00:18:01,613 --> 00:18:03,253
that annoying charity guy?
472
00:18:03,315 --> 00:18:04,315
Why?
473
00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:08,419
Last night's game.
474
00:18:08,487 --> 00:18:10,917
Maddy, you ready
to give this a try?
475
00:18:10,989 --> 00:18:12,089
She's great, Arliss.
476
00:18:12,157 --> 00:18:13,527
Of all the deaf
kids I work with,
477
00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:14,962
she's the best lip reader.
478
00:18:15,027 --> 00:18:17,227
We're gonna test it out.
Okay, Shaq, cover your ears.
479
00:18:17,296 --> 00:18:18,396
Cover your ears.
480
00:18:21,466 --> 00:18:22,936
Tell me what I'm saying now
481
00:18:23,001 --> 00:18:24,571
with all the precision
you can manage.
482
00:18:29,908 --> 00:18:30,978
"Tell me what I'm saying
483
00:18:31,043 --> 00:18:34,053
with all the precision
you can manage."
484
00:18:34,112 --> 00:18:35,312
Cool!
485
00:18:35,315 --> 00:18:36,515
(Skip laughs)
486
00:18:36,582 --> 00:18:37,852
Okay, you ready?
487
00:18:39,217 --> 00:18:40,287
Let's do it.
488
00:18:51,863 --> 00:18:53,533
The umpire said,
489
00:18:53,599 --> 00:18:55,899
"Please sit down, you're
being unreasonable."
490
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,438
What?!
491
00:18:59,605 --> 00:19:01,665
Oh, no. She's kidding.
492
00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:03,440
Maddy's little joke.
493
00:19:03,508 --> 00:19:04,938
(Arliss chuckles)
494
00:19:05,010 --> 00:19:07,480
Arliss: Very funny,
very cute, very funny.
495
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,018
The umpire said...
496
00:19:12,017 --> 00:19:14,987
"You dumb monkey,
go eat a banana."
497
00:19:15,053 --> 00:19:16,893
I told you Arliss, I told you!
498
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:19,555
This kid's got it
going on! (whoops)
499
00:19:19,625 --> 00:19:23,195
Maddy, how would you
like to meet the president
500
00:19:23,261 --> 00:19:24,931
of the American League?
501
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:26,427
Go to a game, get a ball.
502
00:19:26,498 --> 00:19:28,368
Yeah, okay, good.
Stanley's gonna take you.
503
00:19:28,433 --> 00:19:29,673
Me?
504
00:19:29,735 --> 00:19:31,565
Yeah.
505
00:19:32,871 --> 00:19:33,911
This is important.
506
00:19:33,972 --> 00:19:36,042
I need somebody I can count on.
507
00:19:36,108 --> 00:19:37,718
Wait a minute, Arliss,
you're not gonna go?
508
00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,083
No, Stanley's gonna go with ya.
509
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:42,005
He's the best man
I've got working here.
510
00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:44,520
You still work here, right?
511
00:19:46,718 --> 00:19:48,248
- Right.
- Good.
512
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:51,490
Let me listen to
what you gotta say.
513
00:19:51,556 --> 00:19:53,786
Well, Sammy...
514
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:55,759
you still face a suspension.
515
00:19:55,827 --> 00:19:58,527
Touching an umpire, no
way to un-ring that bell.
516
00:19:58,597 --> 00:20:00,567
But, long after you're
back at center field
517
00:20:00,632 --> 00:20:02,572
that umpire's still gonna
be watching ball games
518
00:20:02,634 --> 00:20:04,704
from a barstool and you
can quote me on that.
519
00:20:04,770 --> 00:20:06,640
Sammy: Okay, I'm down with that.
520
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:08,905
Stanley: Well, here's
how I see the meeting,
521
00:20:08,974 --> 00:20:11,814
I'll open with the
tape and then segue...
522
00:20:14,579 --> 00:20:15,709
(whistling)
523
00:20:15,781 --> 00:20:17,081
Betty Ford.
524
00:20:21,787 --> 00:20:24,787
Arliss (narrating): Every meeting
I attend is my most important.
525
00:20:24,856 --> 00:20:26,856
Enthusiasm is contagious.
526
00:20:26,925 --> 00:20:29,625
What excites me, excites others.
527
00:20:29,695 --> 00:20:31,255
(sighs heavily)
528
00:20:31,329 --> 00:20:33,669
Please, forgive me, I got
here as soon as I could.
529
00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:34,732
Thanks for waiting.
530
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:35,734
You got 30 seconds.
531
00:20:36,968 --> 00:20:38,068
Okay.
532
00:20:38,136 --> 00:20:40,466
A collection of stories
about my exploits
533
00:20:40,539 --> 00:20:42,609
as a sports super agent
is about to be published.
534
00:20:42,674 --> 00:20:44,044
And I wanted to
come to you first
535
00:20:44,109 --> 00:20:47,709
because I think it would
make one hell of a TV series.
536
00:20:47,779 --> 00:20:50,249
It's funny, it's sexy,
it's sports, it's America.
537
00:20:50,315 --> 00:20:52,575
And the only place
for it is on HBO.
538
00:20:52,651 --> 00:20:54,451
It has Ted Turner
written all over it!
539
00:20:54,519 --> 00:20:56,189
So what do you
think? Do you love it?
540
00:20:56,254 --> 00:20:59,394
Hate it. Who'd watch
dumb-ass stories like that?
541
00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:00,888
No, no, you're wrong!
542
00:21:00,959 --> 00:21:04,029
This is a home run, a
slam dunk, a no-brainer!
543
00:21:04,096 --> 00:21:05,456
Pass, I gotta go.
544
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:09,072
Ted, listen to me!
545
00:21:09,134 --> 00:21:10,344
You're making a mistake here.
546
00:21:10,402 --> 00:21:11,942
Don't make me
give this to Rupert!
547
00:21:13,438 --> 00:21:15,008
(humming)
548
00:21:17,709 --> 00:21:20,149
Ted, you're not listening to me!
549
00:21:20,212 --> 00:21:23,012
We're gonna pack this
show full of sports cameos.
550
00:21:23,081 --> 00:21:25,221
We begin and end
every episode with...
551
00:21:25,283 --> 00:21:26,923
My name is Arliss Michaels.
552
00:21:26,985 --> 00:21:28,845
I represent athletes.
553
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:31,360
These are my dumb-ass stories.
554
00:21:31,423 --> 00:21:33,023
(Ted humming)
555
00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:39,925
♪ ♪
556
00:21:39,975 --> 00:21:44,525
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
40292
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
