All language subtitles for Arliss s01e06 The Company You Keep.eng

(dramatic music plays)

Arliss: For most of us,

the dream of becoming a champion

remains a fantasy.

But for a special few,

it is very much a reality.

We cheer them.

We live through them.

Athletes are our last warriors.

My job is to make
their dreams come true.

♪ ♪

My name is Arliss Michaels.

I represent athletes.

These are my stories.

♪ Don't know what it is
that makes me love you so ♪

♪ I only know I never
wanna let you go ♪

♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh, can't you see ♪

♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me? ♪

♪ It happens to be true ♪

♪ I only wanna be with you ♪

♪ I just wanna be
beside you everywhere ♪

♪ As long as we're
together, honey, I don't care ♪

♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh, can't you see ♪

♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me? ♪

♪ No matter what you do ♪

♪ I only wanna be with you ♪♪

- (Arliss narrates) In the
ultracompetitive world - (bat cracks)

Of representing
athletes, I hold my own

against the monolithic agencies

that try to hoard
our greatest stars.

Barry Bonds: Only
from the killer bee!

(classical score plays)

(bat cracking)

I'm coming to penthouse!

Ooh! Boy, I gotta pat myself.

(Arliss narrates) I can compete
with the giants of my industry

because of the rapport
I have with athletes.

I'm not a sycophant who tells
'em only what they want to hear.

Ooh! Touch 'em all.

- (bat cracking)
- I treat athletes as men,

Not demigods.

You are the greatest
ballplayer alive today.

Maybe the greatest of all time,

with apologies
to your godfather.

You came all the way up
here to blow smoke up my ass?

It's not that far.

I think you're opening
your hips a little too fast.

Ha. You're tripping.

Come on, Arliss, you
know why you're here.

You want me to leave
CPM and sign with you.

That's not exactly untrue,

although I do think there
are players of lesser talent

who are getting more
endorsement play than you are.

Do you know why?

I'm too nice a guy?

Not just that. It's that you're
with too big an agency.

CPM is so big, you're
competing with other CPM clients.

There are deals when
Mike Armstrong has to say,

"Hmm, do I give the Nike
spot to Barry or to Griffey?

Let's see. What did Junior get
me for my birthday this year?"

You know, that kinda shit. Whereas
I would wake up every day and think,

"What can I do for
Barry Bonds today?"

I like a big agency, Arliss.

When there's a problem,
they throw their weight around.

(bat cracks)

Let me ask you a question:

Do you have Mike Armstrong's
home phone number?

No.

Ho! Here's mine.

Call me any time, day or night.

(bat cracks)

One thing does piss me off:

How come Ken Griffey Jr. gets
to run for president and not me?

I don't know. I'd vote for you.

(chuckles) Oh!

Oh! Oh, gee, sorry.

I just... I had a little...
Little too much Vaseline.

You got Barry Bonds?

Just a matter of closing him.

Wow. Mike Armstrong
is gonna be pissed.

Well, no more pissed than we were
when that prick stole Agassi from us.

This is a counterstrike
against the evil empire!

- (phone rings)
- What did you tell Bonds?

The truth: That we're
a boutique agency,

that I'll always
be there for him,

and not just through the good
times, through the bad too.

Michael Irvin on line four.

I'm not here.

Uh, he's in a meeting right now.

- We got Bonds. We got Bonds.
- Bonds!

- Whoo-hoo!
- Arliss Michaels' office.

Guys: Bonds! Bonds! Bonds!

Uh, yeah, just one
second, please.

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

(Rita clears throat)

Mr. Armstrong.

Really?

Oh, boss, you gotta do one of them
sack dances over his prone body.

Take the 15 for taunting, you
know? Just so what? He deserves it.

Michael. How is the dean
of the Five-Percenters?

Yes, yes, I agree it
has gotten out of hand.

Sure. Fine. See you there.

(phone clatters)

He wants to meet me at his club.

(jazz music playing)

Cohiba Esplendido. From
Castro's private stash,

$100 a stick.

A hundred dollars? With
apologies to George Burns,

I don't know whether
to smoke it or fuck it.

(both laugh)

So, you and Barry had
a little chat yesterday.

Hey, Mike, you're the one
who started this with Agassi.

Arliss, we probably lose
one client a week, all told.

Of course, for every one client
stolen from us, we sign three of theirs.

That sounds like a threat.

(coughs) No thanks,
I've got my own.

(chuckles) Arliss, relax.

I'm not here to threaten you.

In fact, I've always admired that
little mom-and-pop shop you run.

I've had an eye
on it for a long time.

An eye on it?

I wanna buy your company.

You wanna buy Arliss
Michaels Management?

I wanna make you a
member of the CPM family.

I'm not gonna even
entertain that idea.

AMM is not for sale.

I cherish my independence.

Besides, last year, you
laid off 125 of your family.

Oh, you're wrong about
that. I didn't lay off anyone.

I simply reduced the
number of positions.

Oh.

You generate seven
million a year in commissions

with a net of 4.5 million.

The going rate is usually
multiples of earnings times 12,

so I figure a fair price for
your company is 54 million.

(coughs) 54 million.

I will entertain that idea.

Of course you will.
You're not brain dead.

(Arliss narrates) On occasion I've
been approached to sell my company,

but you can't put a price on what Arliss
Michaels Management means to me.

Fifty-four million.

Fifty-four.

(lively music plays)

Arliss: I don't see myself
as a corporate president,

but as the captain
of a winning team.

In fact, if you put
"T-E" in front of AMM,

it spells "teamm."

Arliss! I got him.

Here he is. This is Fabian.

(whimpers)

Fabian?

He's a champion sled dog.

He's the co-leader of the last
three winning teams of the Iditarod.

He's a gold mine.

Oh, and this is Carl.

He... he's a musher.
He, you know, mushes.

And he's completely willing.

To what?

To let us represent Fabian.

Kirby, come here.

(whispers) Do you think I run some
kind of mom-and-pop operation here?

You know what CPM would do if you ever
brought in a dog as a prospective client?

They'd probably
put him to sleep.

Hell, they'd probably
put me to sleep!

But we're not CPM.

Who wants to be? That's
not what we're about.

It's never what
we've been about.

(Arliss narrates) I first met Kirby
Carlisle, the dean of my staff,

in college in the 70's where
we shared similar interests.

(both snorting)

Thanks a lot,
Arliss. Am I clean?

Wait a second. Go like this.

- Good. Good, good.
- ("Star-Spangled Banner" plays)

Oh, game's starting. I gotta go.

Okay, look, I'll
meet you afterwards

- I've lined up some entertainment.
- (both laugh)

Take care. Have
a... Have a good one.

(Arliss narrates) When Kirby was selected
as the number-one pick in the NFL draft,

it was only natural that he
asked me to represent him.

He knew I'd have his
best interests at heart.

Well, gentlemen, Kirby Carlisle is
going to join the million-dollar club,

five years at 200,000 per. Done.

No, not... not done.

The 200,000, that's
just the base salary,

that's just if he shows up.

In addition, he is to receive
double the usual per diem

and private deluxe
accommodations on the road.

- Don't forget Tull.
- Oh, and 15 tickets to Jethro Tull.

Uh, excuse me, who's Mr. Tull?

No, no, no, no. Not Mr. Tull.
Jethro Tull. It's a rock band.

You know, "Aqualung."

(vocalizing "Aqualung")

Man: Excuse me. Whoa. Young man.

We're going to offer
your client a contract

to play football, that's all.

And if you were an
experienced representative,

you wouldn't embarrass
yourself or your client any further.

Sir, I may be inexperienced,
but I am not naive.

I know if it wasn't
for this young man,

you wouldn't be
having me in this room,

so why don't we just
cut through the bullshit?

I've got what you want,

and he wants
Jethro Tull tickets.

Both: ♪ Snot running down
his nose ♪ (vocalizing music)

♪ Greasy fingers... ♪♪

(Arliss narrates) From that
moment on, I had a career.

Unfortunately, after breaking
his throwing arm in 13 places,

Kirby's career was short-lived.

He became an associate at AMM

and continues to bring
interesting clients into the office.

I'm telling you boss...
Milk-bones, chew toys, stud fees.

Fabian's a hero to other dogs.

They'll look up to
him as a role model!

Kirby. (whispers)
Dogs don't shop.

Nice to meet you.
Have a good mush.

(Arliss narrates) Being independent
means no corporate politics.

I'm always upfront
with my colleagues.

Stanley. Hypothetical.

Shoot.

An owner friend of mine has
capital gains of about $50 million.

What kind of taxes
is he looking at?

Capital gains rate is 28%,

Yeah, but how could he avoid,
you know, paying those taxes?

Well, he could move the
money into an offshore operation

- on the Cayman Islands...
- Good.

But the money would
have to stay there.

- No good.
- Or... and this is a personal favorite...

He could swap for stock and pay
no taxes until he sells his shares.

(Arliss narrates) I pride myself
on discovering new talent.

For example, Stanley Babson, my
crackerjack head of business affairs.

I first encountered Stanley when
he was a lowly studio accountant.

I don't understand.
Over the past few years,

my client has made a series
of hit films for your studio.

"Four into Six Won't
Go," "The Haymakers"...

"Wheels of Heat,"
"Big, Bad, Broken."

And my own personal favorite,
"The Return of Biff Kluger."

- Thank you.
- Now, together, this multi-pic pack

Has grossed over $50 million,
they only cost nine to make.

So, explain to me why my
client hasn't seen a nickel of profit!

Mr. Michaels, I assure you,

No one here is taking
advantage in any way.

This is standard accounting
practice for our industry.

- (sighs)
- I was hoping for some payoff.

If I had known this, I would've
asked for cash in front.

Let me explain. These films
took in $50 million in rentals.

The theater owners keep half,

which brings us
down to 25 million.

Of that 25, seven goes
into distribution fees,

the films cost nine,
interest brings that to 12.

You have to double that cost
for prints and advertising...

(calculator clicking)

lot fees, studio
service rentals,

which leaves you with...

$14.3 million...

in the red.

What a bunch of shit.

Hey, come here for a second.

(whispering) Just between me and
you, how do you get away with this?

Oh, this is nothing. You
should see what we have

on the books for
Aladdin's entourage.

- (sighs)
- (knocks on door.)

Mr. Babson, I think you've spent
ample time explaining to these gentlemen.

Might I suggest you get back
to work on our money makers?

Oh, we're working here
through the weekend.

Uh, this weekend?

(sighs) This Saturday is my
parents' 40th wedding anniversary.

Happy anniversary, but if
you can't be here Saturday,

Don't bother coming in Sunday.

- Understood?
- (mouths)

Understood, Mr. Dalrymple.

We're reorganizing.
(sighs) I don't like it.

If Walt was still here, this
wouldn't be happening.

(mutters) If Walt was still
here, I wouldn't be happening.

Sweet guy.

Hey, he's the nicest guy here.

You ever think of leaving?

Every second of the day.

I don't doubt it. Look at you.

I mean, you're a young man
and you're already losing your hair.

I guarantee you that won't
happen if you come to work for me.

And so... short form...

Your friend might wait
until after the election

and just hope that they
lower the capital gains rate

they way they're
always promising.

But what if he wanted the
money is his hands, now.

Then he'd pay
$14 million in taxes.

Fourteen million! Since when
is Uncle Sam a partner with...

He's a very close
friend. Excuse me.

Oh, I hate to rain
on whatever parade

you've been on for
the past two hours,

but Rodney Hampton
called, he's leaving us.

What? I don't believe this.

After I engineered
that bidding war

between New York
and San Francisco,

I made him rich! Where
the hell is he going?

CPM.

Well, CPM is very good.

What? You're not
gonna fight to keep him?

Fight? Little boys fight.

Well, you... you're just
gonna let him go to CPM?

Since when is it necessary to
impugn the integrity of my competitors?

You're acting strange.
What happened last night?

Listen, I've gotta go see
Bernie Orenstein now.

Your lawyer? Now? No, no, no, no

I've got you with
Dave Justice at 5:00,

which means I have to
bump your stress test,

which you desperately
need, to 6:00.

- Now you have cocktails at...
- (Arliss narrates) If there was a Franklin Day Planner event

In the Olympics, Rita
Wu would take the gold.

Remember your cholesterol level.
No meat, no fish, have a salad.

Non-fat dressing.

(Arliss narrates) Recognizing
her unique talents,

I try to ensure that Rita does
not stay chained to her desk.

Oh, listen, while
I'm at Orenstein's,

could you swing by
and pick up my laundry?

I'm all out of clean shirts.

Sure! And on your way out,

do you mind stopping by the
grocery store and picking me up

some Thai, tampons,
milk, and cat food?

I take it that's a "no."

(pencil sharpener whirs)

No, not the singer
Fabian. The dog.

The Iditarod champion.

Where have you been? On Mars?

("Ride of the
Valkyries" playing)

Is this an office or a
13-year-old's bedroom?

(man laughs)

Uh, I'll call you back.

- (indistinct chatter)
- Umm...

Um, excu... can I help you?

No.

Who the hell are they?

CPM foot soldiers.

What are they doing?

Kicking the tires.

The nerve of that guy, saying my office
looks like the bedroom of a 16-year-old.

Stanley thinks that Arliss
is gonna sell AMM to CPM.

No way! Arliss isn't
gonna sell to CPM.

- They're the enemy.
- Huh! Everything has its price.

They don't have executive
assistants at CPM.

They don't have paper.
They just have email.

Holy shit. Dress code.

You two can worry about
emails and dress codes,

but you're missing
the big picture.

Downsizing.

Both: Downsizing?

Look, when they come,
I'll do all the negotiating.

I figure if they'll pay
54 million, they'll pay 60.

Wait a minute, wait a
minute. I'm your lawyer.

When a proctologist
goes for a physical,

does he stick his
own finger up his ass?

You're too close
to this, Arliss!

Let me run point.

(knocks)

(chuckles)

Boss, I got some possible
deals I wanted to run by you.

- Court date?
- Hmm?

I thought that lawsuit from the
Hooters waitress was thrown out.

It was.

Oh, what? Only you and
Stanley can wear ties?

- (knocks on door)
- (door opens)

Arliss! I stayed all night,
figuring a way to save

your friend an additional
four million in taxes.

You stayed all night?

Well, where I was
trained, we had a saying:

"If you can't come
in on Saturday,

don't bother coming
in on Sunday."

(knocks) Good morning, Arliss.

Here are your shirts,
lightly starched.

Okay, okay, what's going on?

Why don't you tell us?

Are you selling AMM to CPM?

So we'll all be
"O-U-T" on our "A-S-S."

CPM, their minority-hiring
practices are abysmal!

They won't appreciate my
skills the way you do, boss.

Okay, enough,
enough, enough. Listen.

There's nothing to worry about.

Bernie, tell them.

Arliss, your magnanimous boss, is
gonna give each of you a 15% raise.

That was CPM will have to pay your
increased salary as part of the deal.

So nobody worry. If they
wanna lay off one person,

there's no deal.

- Huh! (laughs)
- That's kind of good, actually.

- Stanley: Whoo!
- Arliss: You know what?

Y'all just got raises.

Stanley: People what did I say?
Did I tell you he wouldn't sell us out?

(marching music plays)

There he is. Good morning.

Fabian?

(yawns)

We've been trying to sign that
four-legged bastard for months.

You landed Fabian?

Oh, well, yeah.

So, what do you think
he's gonna do for you?

I mean us. Hmm?

Are you kidding?

Milk-bones, chew
toys, stud fees.

I see Fabian as a
role-model for other dogs.

Brilliant. You are brilliant.

Well, time is money. Shall we?

Armstrong: Thank you.

Please. Let's go.

♪ ♪

(indistinct chatter)

Okay, let's make a deal.

The number on the
table's 54 million.

You have too much square
footage for a company this size.

We want to fold you
into the Armstrong tower.

Not a chance! AMM is
gonna stay under this roof.

All right, you can stay here, but
only if you re-engineer your staff.

Some of your people
overlap with ours.

Fine, so re-engineer your staff.

- (scoffs)
- You know what? I don't think we're too far apart

On this fellas.
Anybody got a pen?

Also, I want complete autonomy.

I wanna report only to
CPM's board of directors.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Total
autonomy is out of the question.

Now here's a contract.
Are you gonna sign it or not?

- Look at this. I found a pen.
- I'm not signing until we've gone over every point.

Then I guess we have
nothing more to talk about.

(sighs)

Oh, I love this. I love this.

They're putting the
contracts away...

A metaphor for "the
deal is off the table."

Now, close the briefcases
with a dramatic snap.

- (briefcases snap)
- See? That...

I can't do that with
my little Ghurka bag.

The little belt
buckles are so quiet.

You can't do that.

Okay, enough of the theatrics.

Do we wanna make a deal or not?

Of course we do... if you're
prepared to be reasonable.

Reasonable? This is Arliss
Michaels, the working man's friend.

Please.

Thank you.

Now then...

Shall we continue? Hmm?

Okay, let's talk
golden parachutes.

Now, redecorating allowance,

travel and
entertainment expenses,

uh, air miles for me
and my entire staff.

How's it going?

I can't tell.

You know, I like
everything the way it is.

Starbucks right downstairs.

Long-distance phone
calls. Postage meter.

Petty cash.

I'm joking. It's a joke.

Let's talk stock.

I want 500,000 shares,

options on another
half a million.

Against the 54 million.

No-ho-ho. On top of.

Don't be so greedy.

Just shut up and sign.

Agreed.

Not bad.

Point 13: Auto lease.

Boy, I really love that
S600 V12, don't you?

Wow, wow, wow!

(cell phone ringing)

- (beeps)
- Yes?

Mm-hmm.

One moment, please.

Oh. Hello.

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Ooh, interesting.

Oh, I like that
better, I guess. Yeah.

Okay. Bye.

- How do you like that? We're in the jerky.
- (beeps)

(men laugh)

What's that?

Oh, we've decided to buy
this little jerky company...

Ultra Jerky, Circle Jerky...

It's a division of Frito-Lay,

so I'm sorry, Arliss,
the deal is off.

(men laugh)

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

You're saying you bought
a division of Frito-Lay

instead of me? Us?

Look, I wanted to
buy your company,

because we needed to
write off $54 million today.

That's why I put
up with all this crap.

And along came
Frito-Lay. (laughs)

It's a crazy business, huh?

Yeah, yeah, okay,
I'll tell you what.

I won't lay off anyone,

but I will reduce the
number of positions.

Stock? I don't need stock.

- Who needs stock? Stock's overrated.
- (laughs)

Oh, by the way,

if you even speak
to Barry Bonds again,

this space'll be a travel
agency by the end of the year.

Peace, huh?

- (laughing)
- Wait, wait, wait, but we had a deal!

Didn't we, Bernie?

Hey, you're the doctor.

What happened? Is the deal over?

There is no deal.

- No deal?
- No deal.

- But... wait.
- That's good.

54 million.

Way to go, boss!

- You did the right thing.
- What made you change your mind?

Well, they wanted me to
downsize, and I said, "No way!"

Nobody gets me to sell out the
people who are most important.

Ahh, you!

Of course, there is the
matter of those raises.

Because the merger
didn't go through,

I'm afraid your salaries are
gonna have to remain the same.

I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

Actually, Arliss, since you
negotiated the raises beforehand,

you're still liable
to pay 'em. (laughs)

- ♪ ♪
- (Stanley laughs)

- Kirby: Ah, give it up.
- What a sweetheart.

Way to go. Thanks, man.

(indistinct chatter)

(Arliss narrates) I
remain firmly committed

to keeping my
company independent,

and no amount of money could
ever make me want to change that.

- (phone rings)
- Stanley: What did I say?

♪ ♪

Arliss Michaels'
office. Uh, hold on.

It's Barry Bonds on line four.

You wanna take it?

Yeah.

Barry?

Wonderful. Welcome
to the AMM family.

- (laughter)
- Stanley: You dirty dog, you.

Arliss: My name
is Arliss Michaels.

I represent athletes.

These are my stories.

♪ ♪

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