All language subtitles for The Munsters s02e06 Happy 100th Anniversary.eng

Now that's
what I call a body.

They sure knew how to put them
together in the old country.

The old family coach. You
know, that body was handmade.

What a fun car.

Oh, look,
isn't that Uncle Boris?

That's Uncle Boris,
all right.

He was a real swinger.

Look at this.

It must be some sort
of beauty contest.

Herman,
that's your wedding picture.

No wonder they're such
attractive people.

The date's right here
in the corner: 1865.

Eight...

Herman, doesn't that date
mean anything to you?

Let me see...

Oh, yeah, I've got it. That was
the beginning of the War of 1812.

No, 1865.

That means that this Saturday, you and
Lily will have been married 100 years!

Oh, boy!
Our anniversary.

And Lily hasn't mentioned
anything about it.

You know what I'm gonna do, Grandpa?
This Saturday, I'm gonna surprise her...

and buy her
a wonderful gift.

A gift. Good, Herman, good.
What kind of a gift?

Something that will
make her kiss me...

and throw her arms around me
and hug me to pieces.

Herman, okay, all right.
Herman, you're 150 years old.

Don't line up anything
you can't handle.

Just think, Aunt Lily...

this Saturday it will be 100 years since
you and Uncle Herman were married.

Oh, yes.

I'll never forget the reception
in the old family mausoleum.

I tell you, some people
got up and danced...

who hadn't danced in years.

What do you think Uncle Herman will
give you for your anniversary?

I don't know, but I'm going to
surprise him with a beautiful gift.

Do you think he's
forgotten your anniversary?

Of course he has. You know how things
keep flying in and out of his head.

Sometimes I think I should get
the doctor to put in screens.

Oh, looky what we've got
for dessert.

Cherries Jubilee.

Thank you, Marilyn.
You forgot to light it.

Here, Lily.

[clicking]

Allow me.

Heck, Grandpa,
I wanted to light my own.

[clearing throat]

Speaking of what each of us
is gonna do this Saturday...

I was wondering if you had
any particular plans, dear.

This Saturday?
Why do you ask, Herman?

Well, I just thought if you
didn't have any special plans...

I might finish up a little
work down at the parlor.

You're going to work
at the parlor Saturday?

We had a little explosion in the back room
and things are still kind of up in the air.

Did you have any plans?

Oh, no. No.

I'll go get some coffee.

Just a minute, Marilyn.
I'll help you.

I'm gonna give some of my dessert
to Spot, while it's still burning.

Come and get it, Spot.

You know what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna surprise Lily.

We have $1,200 in our bank account.
I'm going to draw out $1,000".

And buy he:
a super-meats present.

Something really
ring-a-ding-ding.

Aunt Lily, did you hear what Uncle
Herman said about working Saturday?

That means he's completely forgotten
your wedding anniversary.

I know he did.

But this gives me a chance
to really surprise him.

Marilyn, I'm going to take $1,000
out of our bank account...

and get him
a fantastic present.

You got a problem, Brenton?
Oh, yes, Mr. Hoglan.

These two checks just came in at the
same time, against the Munster account.

They're both for $1,000.

Well, how much is in the account?
Only $1,200.

There's nothing
we can do about it.

Just send them both back
marked "Insufficient Funds."

Oh, goody! I just love to
use that rubber stamp.

How do you like that?

Herman, will you stop waving
that thing in front of my face?

I've seen bum checks before.

Grandpa, how could they do
this to such a sweet fellow...

who just wants to buy his wife
a wedding present?

Now what am I gonna do?

Herman, there's only one
thing you can do: moonlight.

You get a part-time job at night to earn
enough money to buy Lily a present.

But Lily might get suspicious if I got
extra-curricular nocturnal employment.

Herman, then all you have to do is tell
Lily you're working late at the parlor.

Then when you've earned enough money
to buy her the present, you quit.

That's a good idea.

That's a good idea.

You know, Grandpa...

when the chips are down, it's nice to
have a no-good sneak like you to turn to.

"Insufficient funds."
It's a disgrace.

We Draculas have always had
a little something...

tucked away in the vault
for a rainy day.

I guess you'll just
have to get Uncle Herman...

a less expensive
anniversary present.

Oh, that's a shame.

Wait a minute.

Maybe I could take a part-time
job to earn the money?

Well, you could do that,
Aunt Lily.

What do you suppose
happened to the bank balance?

Well, you know, there's always such a
lot of expense when you raise a family.

Last year, Eddie's teeth
started coming in straight...

and we had to buy
a new pair of braces.

Of course, it was worth it.

I wouldn't want that boy going
through life with false fangs.

I'm gonna get down there
this morning.

Herman, let me give you
a piece of advice.

When you talk
to the interviewer...

you're a charming, good-looking fellow.
Don't spoil it by being aggressive.

Thank you, Grandpa.

"Don't spoil things
by being aggressive."

Herman,
what are you doing?

I'm writing it down
in my goody book.

Oh, boy.

Herman, I thought
you'd left for the parlor.

Just leaving, dear.

Lily, I won't be home
for dinner.

I'm working overtime
at the parlor tonight.

As a matter of fact, I'm working
late every night this week.

Well, Uncle Herman, you just keep
working hard for Mr. Gateman...

and maybe this Thanksgiving he'll
give us another beautiful turkey.

Yes. Remember
the one last year?

It looked so natural,
lying on the platter...

with its legs folded
across its chest.

Well, toodle-oo. Come on, Grandpa.
Walk me to the car.

That's a break, Aunt Lily.

With Uncle Herman
working every night...

you'll be able to take a
part-time job in the evenings.

Yes.

Marilyn, I'm going down for
an interview this morning.

The Cleaver Employment Agency.

[knock on door]

Come in.

I'm Mr. Munster.
They said I was next.

Yes, Munster.

I'll close the door. There
must be a draft in here.

You see, there?
You do have a chill.

You really must
keep out of these drafts.

I'll be all right in a minute.

Are you applying
for employment?

Yes, I was looking
for some night work.

Offhand, I'd say that your
chances are infinitely better...

of acquiring
the night position...

as opposed to going out
in the daylight.

I mean, I think you'd do fine.
Working at night.

Well, you see, I already do have a day job.
I work in a funeral parlor.

And, frankly,
I really dig it.

Excuse me.

Let me get that straight.

You say your previous employment
was as a nurse's aide.

That's right, Mr. Walpole,
with Florence Nightingale.

You say you'd like to take a
job under your maiden name.

What is your maiden name?
Dracula.

Dracula? I don't believe we've
ever had a Dracula in here before.

Oh, really?

It's a very common, down-to-earth
name in Transylvania.

Excuse me, I think I need
another drink of water.

Thirsty, Parker? Yes. I kind
of ran into a tough one.

Really? Well...

say, old buddy, how would you
like to trade interviews?

You got a rough one?

No. Mine's strictly routine.
Just thought I'd help you out.

Thank you, old man.

[both screaming]

It sure is a shame you had to go through
five different interviewers today...

down at the employment agency.

At least they finally
gave you a job.

That's right, Marilyn.

I'll be working every night
this week at the shipyards.

Don't you look chic
in your welding ensemble.

Thank you, dear.

You know, the man said the
job would not only pay me...

enough to buy
Herman a present...

but would keep me
off the streets at night.

Wonder what he could have
meant by that?

? Mama's little baby
loves shortnin', shortnin' ?

? Mama's little baby
loves shortnin' bread ?

? Mama's little N'

[shrieking]

What's the matter,
Grandpa?

Don't you recognize your own
son-in-law, the welder?

Herman, you gum-brain. What are you
doing in that ridiculous outfit?

Well, guy, Grandpa.
I got a job.

I'm working down
the shipyards every night.

And I'll be making
enough money...

so I can get a real neato
anniversary present for Lily.

Besides, on a job like this, you
meet some very interesting people.

Peek-a-boo.

Oh, boy, Marilyn. I've got a secret
to tell you that I just can't keep.

But I have a secret to tell you.
Now, let me tell mine first.

Wait a minute. I'll tell--
It's very important--

Wait a minute,
I've got it.

We'll both tell our secrets
at the same time.

I suppose we could.

Okay.
On your mark, get set, go.

Herman's working at the shipyards!
Lily's working at the shipyards!

That's funny, I thought you said Uncle
Herman's working at the shipyard.

And I thought I heard you say that
Lily's working at the shipyard.

Which, of course, is preposterous.
No, it isn't, Grandpa.

Aunt Lily is working at the shipyards.
The Crosby Shipyards.

But that's where Herman is working.
The Crosby Shipyards.

Isn't that touching?

Each one of them got a job to give
the other an anniversary present.

But, Marilyn,
wait a minute.

If they both find out that they're working
there, it'll spoil it for both of them.

We'll just make a promise not
to tell either one of them.

Okay, good.
And we'll swear it in blood.

We'll just shake hands.

I'm shaking hand,
but I'm thinking blood.

[machines whirring]

[hammering]

[metallic clanking]

Well, Herman, how did your first
night go on your new job?

Grandpa, I had a blast.

I met a welding partner who's
a very wonderful person.

What kind of a man is he?

Well, he isn't exactly a man.

Then he's a boy.

No, he isn't a boy, either.

Herman, if your welding
partner is not a man...

and he's not a boy,
what is he?

He's agirl.

[gasping]

Oh, you met someone
your first night on the job?

Yes, Marilyn,
working right next to me.

And we had such fun trying to
communicate through all that noise.

I guess they're taking on lots
of women again at the shipyards.

I suppose she's a typical
American housewife like you.

She's not exactly a housewife.

A little more rugged. You
mean, she's sort of a tomboy?

Well, no.

She's just sort of...

a plain, ordinary boy.

You mean your welding
partner is a man?

[gasping]

Aunt Lily.

Burn. Burn. Burn.

Another toasted marshmallow?

Thank you, Grandpa.

I don't like the idea of Aunt Lily
talking to some strange man on her job.

Especially with Uncle Herman
at the same shipyards.

Suppose he saw them?

Listen, Herman has his eye
on some cutie down there.

Suppose Lily saw them?

I guess there's
no chance of that.

There are thousands of people
working at that shipyard.

Yes.

[machines whirring]

[metallic clanging]

Herman,
I still don't think...

that you should be horsing
around with that lady welder.

There's no telling
who might find out.

It might even
get back to Lily.

Lily who?
Lily, your wife.

I think any woman who forgets her
husband's 100th wedding anniversary...

has no call to be jealous.

Anyway, that lady welder
and I are just friends.

Just because I'm a welder, you know, doesn't
mean I'm carrying the torch for her.

Fine. Okay, Herman, but
may I ask you something?

Why are you making
so many sandwiches?

I just thought if at work
my co-worker gets hungry...

she might like to dip into my lunch
pail as a gesture of friendship.

Aunt Lily, I hate to give you
advice, but if I were you...

I wouldn't encourage that welder
friend of yours at work tonight.

I'm not going to
encourage him, Marilyn.

I'm just going to share
my supper with him.

But, I think if Uncle Herman
found out he'd be very upset.

How could he find out? He's
working at the parlor nights.

Anyway, a husband who
forgets his anniversary...

doesn't deserve
too much consideration.

[sighing]

Hope my friend
likes bat milk yogurt.

[machines whirring]

[metallic clanking]

Badge number 13,
report to me at once.

Badge 13, report at once.

Boar's head knackwurst.

Bat's milk yogurt.

He must like
the same thing I do.

Heavens to Betsy!

Could this
provocative stranger...

be my husband, Herman?

The Admiral is making a little inspection trip.
So keep on your toes.

Aye, aye, sir.

[clanging]

Badge number seven,
report to me, please.

Badge number seven.

Boar's head
knackwurst sandwiches.

And bat's milk yogurt.

Just like Lily
makes me at home.

Isn't that a coinci...

Lily.

Gad-Looks.

I've been flirting
with my own wife.

The Admiral's making
an inspection trip.

Now he's a stickler
on workers' morale.

So let's be on the ball
when he gets here.

Everything will be
shipshape in my section, sir.

I hope.

This is Admiral Melford.

He's making a little inspection
to boost the workers' morale.

Take off your helmets
and say hello.

Come on,
take them off.

Flirt with a stranger
in the shipyards, will you?

Is that any way to
respect our marriage?

What are you talking about?

You were flirting with a big goon
and you didn't even know it was me.

Shame, shame, shame.

Herman Munster, I'll teach you.
Take that.

You two-timer.

Poyen this is the worst
morale I've ever seen.

These people are fired.

Aunt Lily, Uncle Herman, you're
acting like a couple of children.

Now, listen, you two. I've got
this whole thing figured out.

After you hear
what I have to say...

your marriage will be all
peaches and cream again.

I hate peaches.
I hate cream.

You both got jobs at the shipyard.
You worked side by side.

And you both wore welding masks, so
you weren't known to each other.

Herman didn't know
who I was...

so he thought he was
flirting with somebody else.

Flirt, flirt,
flirt, flirt, flirt.

Now wait a minute. You were unknown
to each other, but still attracted.

Underneath, there was still
that spark of romance.

Even under the masks, you knew
you were made for each other.

You two fell in love with each other
all over again. Sight unseen.

And do you know
what day it is?

Happy anniversary,
Lily.

Happy anniversary,
Hermie.

To think that you were working
down at those shipyards...

just to buy me a present.

And to think that you were working
down there to buy me one.

And now we both
got fired...

and we have nothing. Oh, yes, we do.
We have each other.

Isn't that neat?
Isn't that touching?

Isn't that romantic?

Isn't that sickening?

[sawing]

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