All language subtitles for Ask.Dr.Ruth.2019.1080p.HULU.WEB-DL.AAC.H.264-Monkee.esp.-en

[Dr. Ruth laughs]

Well, put it on again.

What's her name? Alexis.

Wait to?
Is it called Alexa? Alexa?

Alexa, will I get a boyfriend?

[Alexa] Sorry, I don't know.

Me neither. Unplug it!

If you don't know that, what is she for? [laughs]

Alexa, who is Dr. Ruth?

[Alexa]
A towel is an absorbent piece

of cloth or paper that is used for drying
a body or a surface.

[laughs] No.

Alexa, who is Dr. Ruth Westheimer?

[Alexa]
Ruth Westheimer, known as Dr. Ruth,

she is a German Jewish immigrant
in the United States

that became
in figure of television

and popular culture

as a sex therapist,
media character and author.

Rafi!

You listened? He knows who I am!

Well, I think I'll keep it.

She has all the answers.

I love her so much,

the goddess of good sex,
Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

[applause]

Dr. Ruth!

Talk about the penis
like in a cooking show.

First, grasp the penis with your fingers,
knead the bread ... No.

Dr. Ruth alright
let a man make noises

while he's having sex?

Of course it's alright

as long as you don't wake up your wife.

[audience laughs]

I'll make you say vagina and clitoris

because I always listen to you
talk about the penis.

Can you say that word again?

- Erection?
- Yes.

- Yes.
- Say it a little louder.

Erection!

This is the cable version
from Mr. Rogers or something like that, you know?

I mean, can you say clitoris?

Dr. Ruth, does size matter?

[Dra. Ruth] No.

Really?

Size has nothing to do with it ...

[Howard] Really?

... with sexual satisfaction
of a woman.

If you don't do something else
in your radio and TV shows,

you educate people
so you know you are not alone

- with your sexual problems.
- I do.

But you have changed
sex for America

Don't tell me it's worse now.

[Jerry] No, now it's better.
Everybody knows.

You do not feel to suffer.

Don't fake it.
Don't be sad and frustrated.

If not do something about it.

WASHINGTON HEIGHTS
NEW YORK CITY

- [man] Hello, love.
- [Dra. Ruth] Hey, hi.

- How are you?
- Well, you'll be on camera.

- Fantastic.
- Well.

This is the doctor, this is my love.

- Thanks.
- That's my love.

- You too, come here.
- Of course, of course.

Come both, you'll be on camera, thank you

That is a bomber. Well!
And here comes a film crew,

close the door of my room,
I don't want Ryan to come in.

[indecipherable conversation]

Here are some cookies.

I have lived in this apartment
for 54 years.

Rob, have some cookies.

When I started
to appear on television,

people said:
"Why don't you move in?"

But this is an immigrant neighborhood,
and I said:

"No, I'm comfortable here."

Did you call your mother?

[the telephone rings]

- Hi Yes!
[speaking Hebrew]

- Already.
- [the telephone rings]

Well. [Speaking Hebrew]

- Shabbat Shalom.
- [the telephone rings]

- Well, bye, bye.
[speaks in Hebrew]

[in English] Bye, bye, hello?

Yes, she had just come back from doing
Good morning America .

I did very well.

Yes,

find it online
and I'll be there at 6:30.

Well.

For me there is no withdrawal.

And I'm very lucky.

I have a minister
of communications, Pierre.

I tell everyone, if they want
get to me, call Pierre.

[the telephone rings]

[Pierre] Hello Ruth!

[Dra. Ruth] Okay!
They sent me my calendar, thank you.

MINISTER OF COMMUNICATIONS DR. RUTH

Agree.

[Pierre] I've worked
with Dr. Ruth since she started.

she 36 years ago.

[Dra. Ruth] I tell you
what I need, Pierre.

Please pass me the name
Marvel owner type.

Was it Stan Lee?

[Dra. Ruth] He owns Marvel.

I don't remember her name.

[Pierre] I'd love to retire,

but Dr. Ruth is not retiring.

His calendar of hers is overflowing.

It has no end.

So we talk a lot
often,

sometimes up to 25 or 30 times a day.

Most can't keep up
because she doesn't stop.

She teaches two courses,
one at Hunter College

and the other in Teacher's College
from Columbia University.

[Dra. Ruth] Despite investigations
from Kinsey, Masters,

Johnson and Helen Singer-Kaplan,

there is still a lot of work to do.

Tuesday, October 2

you travel to boston
to the Forbes 30 under 30 festival.

Give her an orgasm, if you don't know
how to do it,

- I'll show you next time.
- [laughs]

On Wednesday 21 you go
to Boulder, Colorado,

to the air force academy.

There I see a short person.

I must tell you that the short people
they are the best lovers.

[Pierre] They still invite her
to give lectures.

she has a newspaper column
in the magazine Time.

QUESTION TO DR. RUTH:
HOW TO GET ORGASMS EASIER?

She still writes books.

Do you see it, David?

STAY OR GO

I think he's number forty.

[Pierre] Three books will be released
in 2018.

FROM YOU TWO

Out of Print!
Grandma Roller Coaster.

So on Friday the 12th
you'll be in Good Morning America.

Fix it or leave it
THE ULTIMATE LOVE TIPS

Dr. Ruth, my boyfriend is passing
more time on the phone ...

... than with me.
Do I fix it or leave it?

- Leave it alone!
- Leave it alone?

[Pierre] Sunday
you play the queen at the medieval festival.

I want them to see
that I go hand in hand with the king.

[laughs]

Whoever applauds the loudest ...

TOURNAMENT FIELD

... I promise you good sex
for the rest of his life.

- [the public celebrates]
- Let's give a clap.

[Pierre] If Ruth doesn't have
nothing scheduled

makes sure to get something.

And that's part of the advice
that she always gives me,

get out a bit

to meet people.

It was always like this.

Always dating.

And on June 4, she will celebrate 90 years.

- [Dra. Ruth] Bye.
- [Security guard] Bye.

[Dra. Ruth] Goodbye in the rain.

[Dra. Ruth] Okay, Cliff?

A cluttered desk
IT'S A SIGN OF GREATNESS

Well.

- In agreement.
- In agreement.

When we played all the tapes
to hard drives ...

ARCHIVIST OF DR. RUTH

... they stayed here,
there are hundreds of programs in these ...

[Dra. Ruth] My whole career
is it in these boxes?

[Cliff] Exactly.

But you know I couldn't put them
without you here.

- I know.
- I don't know which button to press,

But I like it!

[Cliff] Well, do you want to see
some of these?

[Dra. Ruth] Yes.

The lady known as "Grandmother Freud"

He has earned millions of followers

just to talk about sex
graphically and nonstop.

If you don't want to hear the things that she says,

consider this a warning.
Not everyone approves of what she does.

[man] Ruth, I'm going to have to arrest her.

[crowd roars]

[Diane Sawyer] This is what happened
at Oklahoma State University.

A person in the audience, upset
for the explicitness of Ruth Westheimer

she wanted to make a citizen arrest.

It was another day in the life
from Dr. Ruth,

the sex therapist
most famous in the nation.

Hello, she is on the air.

- [man] Huh, Dr. Ruth?
- Hello.

[man] I'd like to know her opinion
about the marital effect ...

- Yes.
‐... of vibrators and things like that.

Does your wife use a vibrator?

- [man] No .
- Would you use one?

- I don't know.
- You do not know.

Would you like to see her wear one?

- Yes.
- Well, go and buy it.

[man laughs]
Okay.

[John]
When we went on the air in 1984

nobody was so explicit about sex
as was Ruth.

There are a number of words
that you can't say.

Well, we used to say them.

TV PRODUCER OF DRA. RUTH

And then let me meta
the penis into the vagina from behind.

The reason that is behind
is that the clitoris should be exposed

so that both you and him
could stimulate him to orgasm.

RESERVATIONS OF DR. RUTH
GIVE FOOT TO PROTESTS

CARDS
SEXUAL GARBAGE EVERYWHERE

[Greg] Younger people
does not understand the controversy.

PROPOSES TO "ENJOY" MASTURBATION

ENCOURAGE ORAL SEX

He always says there is nothing normal.

"THIS WOMAN PROMOTES HOMOSEXUALITY
AND ANAL SEX. "

We are all normal.

Ruth was at the forefront of that ...

TV PRODUCER

... and she gave us permission to talk about it.

I think it's wonderful
that people can ask those questions

that they would not have dared to do
just 10 years ago.

[man] Lately, when my girlfriend and I
we are having sex,

I was ejaculating just beginning, and ...

You mean you do
as soon as you enter the vagina?

[man] Just a little bit.

[Greg] I was careful
to make sure

that your professional credentials
were always visible.

He taught at Columbia University,
in Princeton,

and was a licensed sex therapist.

So it worked, and we did
five hundred programs. [laughs]

I think it has to do with not being
neither tall, nor blonde, nor pretty.

And since I'm older, they often say:

"Yes my mother or my grandmother
they could talk like that. "

[man] God bless you, Dr. Ruth.
I'll tell you something,

keep up the wonderful work,
and I hope nobody censors her,

because you are a gift from God
for men and women.

Thanks.

Thank you, from your mouth to the censors!

[Greg] Every time
I'm with her,

people come to tell me
that she changed her lives

or did she save their lives
or she saved them from committing suicide.

All for that adorable grandmother
that she was on TV,

speaking honestly about relationships,

how we love, who we love.

The deepest and most personal things
that give us happiness.

[man] Welcome, the only one
and unique Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

[applause]

[Diane] Wherever he goes,
advises, educates, moves.

Everything that two adults do
consentingly in a private room,

living room or kitchen is fine.

[Diane] But some colleagues
by Dr. Ruth Westheimer

they believe it does more than good.

[Dr. Lee] I think she's very fast
to give specific advice

without knowing the background
of the person's life.

PSYCHOLOGIST

All right, Tracy. I think you should look for yourself
a new man, okay?

[Diane]
Do you think he's reckless?

It is a harsh word. I hate using the word.
But yeah, I think it's reckless.

[Diane] But they don't bother him much
the criticisms. The woman they call

"The Happy Sex Girl"
is actually very hard.

She was a girl from Frankfurt, Germany,
when the Nazis seized power.

[Dra. Ruth] So ...

[creaks]

... I have something that is very sacred.

When I left Germany
when she was ten,

the only thing in the suitcase

my parents

it was this wipe.

Look how beautiful it is.

And here,

KS,

which means Karola Siegel.

My name in Germany was Karola.
And this rag always went with me.

I never forget where I put it.

And, uh, it serves as a tie,

huh, with my past.

I was born on June 4, 1928

with the name Karola Siegel

in a town not far
from Frankfurt, Germany.

She was the only daughter
from some Orthodox Jews.

They weren't rich,

but my first ten years
they were ideal.

Doting father, adorable grandmother,
that they took great care of me.

But in the thirties
things changed drastically

when Hitler took power.

One morning in November 1938,

the Nazis came to the department.

There were no screams, but I had
10 and a half years and I was scared.

I remember the black boots and the Nazis
telling my father: "get dressed."

My grandmother had money
in the hem of the skirt.

she gave it to the Nazi and said:
"take good care of my son."

They took my father to the street,
and before getting on the truck

he turned around, waved and smiled,

even though he must have been terrified.

A few months before
that war broke out,

things were bleak in Germany.

They burned the synagogues
and looted Jewish stores.

My father sent a postcard
from the field of work saying

to join a group
of Orthodox Jewish children.

A transport of children
with permission to go to Switzerland.

He did not want to leave Frankfurt.

He had 13 dolls.
He had two dollhouses. He had skates.

She was an only child.

He had a grandmother who only dedicated herself
to take care of me.

But he was 10 years old, and when he saw the postcard,
I knew I had to go.

The morning after,
my mother and my grandmother came with me

to the Frankfurt train station.

My mother hugged me.
My grandmother hugged me.

I went to the wagon.

I looked back
and I did as my father had done.

I was very sad, but I greeted them

to make it work for them
easier to say goodbye.

[train snorting]

WENGEN, SWITZERLAND

[train puffing away]

My parents actually gave me
life twice.

One when I was born, and the other when
I was sent to Switzerland.

Everyone was very worried on the train.

We were thinking: what will happen next?
Will I see my family again?

Therefore, to pass the time easier,

I started to sing

the songs of my Jewish environment.

Some songs from Germany.
Lots of nursery rhymes.

And I got everyone to sing.

[kids laughing]

When the group of children
came to the town of Heiden, Switzerland,

fifty of us
we went to a hospice,

which ended up being
an orphanage for people like us.

And when I got there
I wanted to show how well raised she was,

for which I went with the director
from the orphanage,

named Riesenfeld, and I said:

[Dr. Ruth speaks in German]
"Hello, my name is Karola Siegel.

I come from Frankfurt an Main. "

[in English]
We were second-class citizens.

We had to take care of the Swiss children
and do housework.

It's strange, because the orphanage
It was called Wartheim.

Warten means to wait.

But we didn't know how long
We were going to be there.

This diary, if you can see it,
it even has a padlock.

Don't ask me where the key is.
I found her! Here it is!

I started keeping a journal
in the orphanage in Switzerland.

I wrote things there
that she didn't tell anyone.

[speaks German]

[in English]
Mom, why aren't you here?

[speaking in German]

[in English] Why aren't you here?
It would work for you.

I would support you. I would give you
a good life.

[young Ruth]
I get up at 6.30 I get dressed.

We wake up the children at 7 am
and then I'm busy until 7.30

then I put the tables,
I clean the dining room

and I comb the children.

After eating I do
let the little ones take a nap.

Then I make patches.

At night I bathe the children
and after dinner I clean their shoes.

I really like my homework.

[Dra. Ruth] I was always afraid
that director Riesenfeld

find those diaries.

That's why I didn't write anything against
from the orphanage.

The people who took care of us
They were also refugees.

They were worried about their lives.

So those kids, myself included,
we became like brothers

that we took care of ourselves
each other.

[Doorbell is ringing]

Well, his wife is here.

[Dra. Ruth] Hello!

- Saved by the bell!
- [Dra. Ruth] Well, we found it.

Good good good.

- You were my first boyfriend.
- [Walter] Good.

WALTER NOTHMANN
CHILDHOOD BOYFRIEND OF DR. RUTH

You were younger than me.

I still am.

You were the person
Heiden's most important

in my life,

and then you cheated on me!

He left with an older woman.

[Debbie Nothmann]
You were also an older woman.

I know I'm older than him
but he left with a much older one!

WALTER'S WIFE

[Walter] We must have been ten or eleven
when we start.

Correct.

We had a classroom in Heiden.

She couldn't stay still, or in silence,
not even for ten seconds.

Impossible.

[whistling]

All the time!

[Dra. Ruth] You were so cute.

You were so handsome

that was absolutely normal
that I fell in love with you.

It was a secret, but safe
that everyone knew.

[Walter]
Of course it was a secret, because ...

it was not allowed to have
relationships with the opposite sex.

I was ...

Verboten.

[Walter] Verboten.

- Was not allowed.
- No way.

As you were in the upper room,

you found the way

to send me messages.

[Walter Nothmann] It was a pulley

made with wood, thread and a hook.

[Dra. Ruth] And inside
I put little pieces of paper for me!

- [Walter] Yes!
- [Dra. Ruth] One of the messages said ...

You are my ray of sunshine ...

I sang it to you.

I want to hear it.

[Dra. Ruth] You're my ...

♪ You are my ray of sunshine ♪

My little...

♪ My golden ray ♪

[both] You make me happy.

- when the sky is gray.
- when the sky is blue.

[both] When the sky is gray!

♪ You'll never know, darling ♪

How much I love you.

♪ Please don't take my ray of sunshine ♪

[Walter]
We were two lonely children ...

at an age when hormones flow.

And we learned ...

[Dra. Ruth] Experimenting.

[Walter] Experimenting.

When we were teenagers, there was someone

What did he say that he had shown you
the breasts.

And I ... [laughs]

But that rumor was running.

And I was horrified.

I knew that Switzerland was surrounded by Nazis

And if they kicked me out of Heiden

Where was he going to go?

There was no place in the world for me.

So we didn't have sex,
but we hug and kiss.

And guess what?
Come, I'll tell you something.

I still remember the taste of those kisses.

Do not tell anybody!

[young Ruth] I read a book titled
Letters for Girls.

It was written by a doctor
to educate sexually.

In nature everything is
Fantastically organized.

You can't think of anything that is dirty.

[male advertiser] This program
contains explicit sexual language

and it is not suitable for all audiences.

The hostess
is Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer.

Hello, we are on the air.

- [Sue] Hello, Dr. Ruth.
- Hello.

- My name is Sue.
- Hi, Sue.

[Sue] I have a question
and I'm ashamed to do it.

[Dra. Ruth] Take a deep breath.

[Sue] Hey, I want to start
to jerk off, okay?

Yes.

[Dra. Ruth] Early
from the eighties ...

[Janet] Go ahead!

[Dra. Ruth] ... people didn't speak
of female sexuality.

Now, Janet, we live in the eighties ...

THREE ARE COMPANY
1984

... and I think I can be
perfectly frank.

To begin with, the men
we have certain needs.

[audience laughs]

The women too.

- Yes?
- [laughs]

[Dra. Ruth] They still believed not only
they didn't talk about sex,

but women didn't enjoy it.

[man] When a woman is frigid,
the thing is...

Oh moment! You can not say
that word on my show.

There are no frigid women

there are women who must learn
to be receptive.

Can you take it by the hand
and show him how you want to be touched,

how can you receive pleasure,
to be, uh, happy?

That's what I'm looking for.

It doesn't have to be with words
it has to be something ...

Well, men, normally,
they don't care, right?

That is not like that.

Julie, it's very important to you,
young people are watching you.

It is important to say that the majority
of men care a lot.

Some, neither you nor Andy,
but some men,

they say if they don't receive
What they want...

- Yes.
- ... there is a word for that,

the word is ...

[Conan] Give what
are you talking now

- [censored] fucking.
- [Conan O'Brien] What?

- [censored] Cojonera. Say it.
- [audience laughs]

I'm not going to ... I'm not going to say that.

No, I won't say that, no!

[Dra. Ruth] I was frustrated
that the term existed cojonera

and there was nothing for women
who did not reach orgasm.

We should coin
a new term,

so that she could say:
"Honey, I need something more

that hugs, kisses and touches. "

- [Conan O'Brien] Yes.
- The term could be vaginera .

- [laughs]
- So, now...

but ... but I'll tell you.

[applause and celebrations]

[Dr. Ruth] It has a bit to do
with my need to make decisions

the idea that women
take the initiative

and take responsibility for themselves

and his own sexuality.

I admired you for a long time

and part of what you've done
really allowed women like myself

speak openly and be decisive

to talk about topics like sex.

Well it's something we're doing
all together, it seems to me.

I never heard women before
tell the truth about sex in public.

[Miriam] You once told me that ...

that you raised me with certain values
but I took them too far.

DAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH

You wanted me to be a feminist
but you said that at dinner,

let the man pay
occasionally.

You don't always have to pay yourself.

Oh you know what you give me things
who talk about feminism?

GRANDDAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH

- Are you a feminist?
- [Dra. Ruth] Nope.

- Because?
- I'm old-fashioned and square.

Don't you think men and women
should we have equal rights?

- Yes.
- [Miriam] Does the same pay?

Sure you do, it still pays.

What about abortion?
Should women decide?

[Dra. Ruth] Sure. I already told.

Okay, so you are a feminist.

[Dra. Ruth] No, I already said ...

I recently asked him,
You know, if she was a feminist.

And she said no
and I got very angry.

Everything she does
is what feminists do.

Talk about family planning,
support gay rights,

AIDS research, right to decide.

But she doesn't consider herself a feminist.

[Miriam] In our language,
they would clearly call you a feminist.

What you reject is activism,
the protest, you know ...

- [Leora] Burning bras.
- The burning of bras.

I don't want to talk about burnt bras.

But I think people see you
as a feminist role model.

OK, it's OK,
I don't want them to change what they think.

- [Leora] Fine, but ...
- I brought you a hat, okay?

[Leora] Yes, but instead
to give me things that say "feminist"

you should keep them for yourself.

- Just say it. "I am a feminist."
- Not.

- [Dra. Ruth] But I love you.
- [Miriam] Say "I'm not a ..."

"I am not a radical feminist."

"I am not a radical feminist"
and I love my granddaughter.

[Dra. Ruth] Once, when
I was already in the orphanage,

my father was allowed
return from labor camp to Frankfurt.

The war had started and it was a place
very dangerous for my parents.

But they never wrote about sadness

in the letters he received every week.

I saved each of them.

[mother] My dear Karola,

your beautiful letter of December 15
arrived today.

Surely your Hanukkah party
it will be finished. Was it pretty?

We haven't heard from Uncle Max.
We hope to hear from you soon.

I wish you, my darling,
the warmest regards.

Loving kisses
from your dear mother.

[Dra. Ruth] The letters gave me
much hope and joy.

Almost all of my father's letters
they were in poem form.

[father] Dear Karola, a good verse
You must know well, it takes a lot of effort.

Maybe one day I can teach you
so that you can also rhyme.

It's easier to say in a poem
what it costs to say in prose.

And think about this.
If you were at home, you wouldn't have letters.

[young Ruth] I'm in the eighth grade now
and next spring I will finish school.

Hopefully I can continue my education

because for my future profession
It would be great to go to school.

But the girls from the orphanage
they can't go to high school.

[Dra. Ruth] Of all of us,

you were the smartest,
even smarter than me.

Your influence on me
it had to do with your intellect.

- Maybe.
- No, this is very serious.

You're lucky because ...

they let you go
to the village school ...

- Yes.
-... and not me.

- It is right.
- Because the girls

- they had to be maids ...
- It is right.

... but my father wanted me to learn.
Nobody takes away your knowledge.

Walter went to school during the day.

him At night he would hide under my bed

and he took the books to rest
of the staircase, where there was light

and could read history,
language and geography.

What were you doing under the bed?

Tremble.

- Tremble?
- Yes.

I was afraid of being caught.

A few times Riesenfeld came

Let's see if everything was fine ...

[Dra. Ruth laughs]

... and I was under the bed,
afraid he would look.

What I learned in the day

she taught him at night.

He transferred the knowledge,

but she absorbed it.

If you are not smart,
you can't do it.

[Dra. Ruth]
I am very grateful to Switzerland.

They gave me a roof and food

but I also know that they used
to people like Riesenfeld,

to run the orphanage. Stupid.

Instead of saying:
"Your parents sacrificed

his only girl to save her ",

said our parents
they didn't love us.

That having had a child
she would never have left him.

There are some things that I cannot forgive.

[young Ruth] I turned thirteen yesterday.

They allowed me to go with the older girls
to the village pool.

I can jump now
of the three-meter springboard.

[water noise]

[mother] My dear Karola,

I look forward to the day
so I can read your journal.

I hope you grow up to become
in a capable young woman,

always healthy and happy.

Your birthday present will come later.

It may take a while.

[Dra. Ruth] I realized it for the first time
that something horrible had happened

when the letters no longer arrived.

[Young Ruth] It's been almost seven weeks

no letters from my parents or grandmother.

Today is already nine weeks and one day
no letters from my parents.

I am here for three years.
I must go to bed.

Good night mom, dad,
and all my relatives.

Yesterday I helped pick up twelve children
who entered Switzerland illegally.

A girl from Hungary told us
all the suffering she saw.

Mass deaths, gas chambers
and other horrible things.

It's been more than five years
no news from my family.

I would very much like to revive
the days with my parents,

I didn't know what they meant to me.

I know I shouldn't lose hope,

but it's not easy to believe
I'll see you again.

WNYC RADIO

[Melissa] I have great respect
for you and I'm glad to have you here.

[Dra. Ruth] Thank you. Very well!

Dr. Ruth, it's great to see you.

[Dra. Ruth] A pleasure,
I've heard of you.

We're back. It's noon at WNYC,
i am jonathan capehart

and I'm talking to the iconic

world famous sex therapist
and as a couple, Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

JOURNALIST

- In her last book ...
- [Dra. Ruth] Wait a minute, Jonathan.

Jonathan, wait.

- [Jonathan] Yes, ma'am.
- Say the word "sex" with more emotion.

[nervous laugh]

[Dra. Ruth] Say the word "sex"
as if he cares.

- [Jonathan] Okay.
- With heat,

with excitement, with incitement.

- [Dra. Ruth] Start over.
- Well, yes, ma'am.

[Jonathan] Hey, I'm talking
with the iconic,

world renowned sex therapist
and as a couple, Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

How's it going?

- It was wonderful.
- [laughs]

I want to thank you
personally, Dr. Ruth.

I grew up as a young gay
listening to it on the radio

and it was wonderful to hear someone
saying positive things

about that aspect of my life,
which I was trying to accept.

Dr. Ruth, you wrote that you hate
the word "normal".

- Correct.
- Because?

Because we do not know what is normal.

And I want to say something about
what you said, Jonathan.

In those days, in 1981,
when I started on WYNY ...

- If right.
- ... Speaking of Sex ,

no one was talking about homosexuality.

The only thing I ever did

that is to say that respect
it is not a matter of debate.

There is no normal.

Look, we have a call
from Brooklyn. Michelle.

[Michelle] When I was a teenager
she in the eighties she listened to her,

and there is a lot of shame around sex.

And the sight of her without judgment of her saved my life.

- Oh, good to hear that.
- [Michelle] Thank you, you are an angel.

I'm glad to hear that,
I agree to be an angel

I am a Jewish angel, great. Thanks.

You know, thinking of Michelle,

What does it feel like people
that he has never seen

tell you things ranging from thank you

to "did you save my life?"

As she knows, I'm five foot four,

And I feel like five foot three.

But I can't sit down to say
I've done a good job.

We must continue ...

... speaking of sexual problems,

and the problems
of sexually transmitted diseases.

Today we will talk about something very serious.

We will talk about the AIDS health crisis

and about how it particularly affects
to the homosexual community.

[Tom Brokaw] The scientists
from the center for disease control

Atlanta showed today
the results of a study

showing that the lifestyle
of certain homosexual men ...

CANCER STUDY
GAY CANCER

... has triggered an epidemic
from a rare form of cancer.

[Dra. Ruth]
It was a very unpopular topic ...

AIDS KILLS
QUARANTINE TO THE WEIRD

... because then the gay
they were not only a minority,

but they were despised.

QUARANTINE IN MANHATTAN ...
... WORLD'S CAPITAL OF AIDS!

[Billy Graham] It could be a judgment from God
about us,

in return for our promiscuous society
and our free living system.

When we violate God's laws,
we pay for it with our body.

BELIEVE IN THE GOSPEL!

[Dra. Ruth] I took it very seriously

for my past as a refugee
German Jewry.

JUDÍA RESIDENTIAL AREA
NO PASSING

Clearly, she had sensitivity

for the people that others
they considered sub-human.

[male listener] Hello, Dr. Ruth.

I have a girlfriend with a lot
from gay friends.

He smokes their cigarettes

and drink their coffees and cocas
and eats his sandwiches.

Can I get AIDS?
Because I am, you know,

a healthy man, and I don't want to
getting AIDS from my girlfriend,

that she goes around with homosexuals.

AIDS. WE NEED RESEARCH,
NOT HYSTERY.

[John] Dr. Ruth's program
reached a peak of popularity

when the AIDS crisis hit.

It was a sad time.
People were dying everywhere ...

AIDS DISASTER AREA

PEOPLE LIVING WITH AIDS

... and we were right in the middle,
doing a sexuality show.

[Dra. Ruth] Some people are attracted to it
people of the same sex,

and I strongly believe

that we, as a society,

we owe it to those people
all our respect.

[man] I'm angry, doctor.

- [Dra. Ruth] Why is he angry?
- I think everyone should be.

I see people who die alone
without their families.

And I see pity. There is a lot of sorrow ...

This is ... this is a virus.
This is an epidemic.

It seems that the largest proportion
of people dying

and succumb to the AIDS virus

they are part of the homosexual community,
and injecting drug addicts

I don't waste a moment of my time
in blaming one or the other group.

I say: let's educate and find the cure.

[Greg] How was the therapist
America's most famous sex ...

GREG WILLENBORG'S VOICE
TELEVISION PRODUCER

... people trusted her.

And she started to bring about a change
on the look at HIV and AIDS.

[Dra. Ruth] What makes me sad

is that AIDS is still very important.

So you must be careful,

they must know who they are going with.

And they have to ... if they don't know
a lot to the person,

use condoms.

I have many friends
who died of that horrible disease.

But I'm always optimistic.

And I still believe there will be a cure.

HAIFA, ISRAEL

[Marga speaks in Hebrew]
Here it is!

Did you have a drink before you came?

[Dra. Ruth] Shalom!

CHILDHOOD FRIEND OF DR. RUTH

[Loam]
You have horrible hair

you have to go to the hairdresser.

- Is it very horrible?
- Yes, you look horrible.

But they did my hair the other day.

[in English] I don't have time
for hairdressers, but my best friend

she already complains about the look of my hair. Well.

[Loam]
It was May 8, 45.

I was...

[speaks German]

[Dra. Ruth in English]
I was peeling potatoes.

[Marga] ... peeling potatoes
for the entire orphanage.

And I heard the war was over.

- [radio static]
- [man speaking German]

My first thought was ...

What will happen to my parents?

[Dra. Ruth] The orphanage
received the list of survivors

but instead of calling
to children individually,

they sat us together

and read it for everyone.

My family was not on any list.

We were worried about knowing
what would happen to us.

Now what?

We were no longer Germans.
We were never Swiss.

They put us on a train.

and we saw another train full of Nazis.

Those German prisoners
They looked out the windows.

And I remember thinking:
"Maybe you killed my family."

When we arrived in Marseille,

I had never seen the sea.

- Not.
- I thought, "Oh, God,

check it out.

Little Karola Siegel, seventeen years old,
from Frankfurt am Main

she is going by boat to Palestine. "

We went to a Kibbutz,

what is a settlement
collective for Jews.

There was a lot of hatred towards Germany,

with reasons. So people
who was responsible for us told me:

"You can't call yourself Karola anymore.
She is very German. "

And I said that if it couldn't be Karola
I would use my middle name Ruth

because I believed with hope

that if someone in my family was still alive,

I would know that was my middle name.

They would come and find me.

KIBBUTZ RAMAT DAVID, ISRAEL

[cow mooing]

[Dra. Ruth] Muuu!

They are beautiful.

Loam,

This reminds me of my first night

His name was Kalman.

He was very handsome.

he was in the army

and I was visiting his brother Shaul,

that he was my boyfriend.

But only from kissing and hugging.

[man] Were you dating her brother?

You ask such stupid questions!

Yes, but I said goodbye to Shaul.

And I went with his younger brother, Kalman.

Shaul told his brother:

"Take good care of her."

[speaking Hebrew]
Take good care of her.

[in English] I knew I should
go to a private place,

so Kalman and I went
to a haystack like this, upstairs.

That was my first night of real sex.

Is it a nice memory?

It is a nice memory.

[Dra. Ruth] It was a youthful love,

but like many young loves,
I had no future.

A few months later she told me:
"we have to end the relationship."

I wanted us to be
together forever.

He did not want to.
He said it would be a burden.

[Young Ruth] Why did this have to happen?

I gave him all the love I could

but she took everything and gave me nothing.

One word comes to me all the time: single.

I am so alone in this world.
I miss my parents terribly.

YAD VASHEM
WORLD HOLOCAUST MEMORY CENTER

[Dra. Ruth] The Nazis wore
detailed records.

And for many years no one
wanted to see head on

what happened to my parents.

But as difficult as it is for me,

I have the obligation to know
what was the fate of my family.

SON OF DR. RUTH

I was thinking, you know, when
my parents told me about the holocaust,

or when my mother told me

that she never saw her parents again
from the age of 10.

I have no memory
of some moments.

[Miriam] When I grew up, I realized
that she had no maternal grandparents.

So she asked him,
and she answered me.

But my mother didn't give me information.

[Simmy] Good,
What is her maiden name?

Siegel, S ‐ I ‐ E ‐ G ‐ E ‐ L.

COMMUNICATIONS DIVISION

We have a lot of Siegels here.

Find Julius Siegel.

- Julius?
- Yes, my father, Julius. That's him.

- What does he say? List of...?
- List of murdered Jews in Germany.

[Dra. Ruth] she died in Auschwitz. 1942.

Oh boy

My mother's name was Hanauer.

Irma.

[humming]

- This too...
- Oh, that's it!

- Neither Hanauer, she's that.
- Not Hanauer.

- What does it say? She was born in ...
- He was born in Wiesenfield ...

- I was also born in Wiesenfield. Yes.
- ... Germany, in 1903.

- Part of the war lived in ...
- Frankfurt am Main, Germany.

During the war he was
in the Litzmann Ghetto.

[Dra. Ruth] Right,
And nobody knows what happened?

[Simmy] Irma was killed
in the holocaust,

- but there is no specific location.
- [Dra. Ruth] There is no location.

Oh boy

Sad.

My mother has no date of death,

she just says "verschollen"
which is a horrible word.

Verschollen means missing,

as if she had disappeared from the world.

She was killed somewhere
but nobody knows, nobody knows where,

nothing.

I know my father was killed
at Auschwitz, and the date.

- You're recording, Ruth.
- Ruth K.

The K is for Karola.

- I am...
- [Simmy] You were a survivor.

[Dra. Ruth] My name is not
myself a survivor.

I call myself an orphan of the Holocaust,

because I was not in a field
but I survived.

Thank you all for keeping it alive
the memory of the Holocaust.

If they hadn't sent me to Switzerland
I wouldn't be alive today.

I'll cry later, when no one is around.

The Yekkes, German Jews,
they don't cry in public.

Dr. Ruth K. Westheimer.

[Miriam] I think the trauma
for that unimaginable loss of her parents

she reconfigured her entire emotional map.

And she doesn't allow herself,

you know, that deep cry

what do you let go when you free yourself
of a very great pain.

I don't know if she ever had that.

YAVNE, ISRAEL

I will go no further
there is a warning about a dog.

[Ryan] There are no dogs.

- No dog? How do you know?
- [Ryan] There isn't. I just came in.

[Ryan laughs]

[Dra. Ruth] I don't trust anyone.

- Shalom!
- [in Hebrew]

WEAPONS COLLECTOR

[Dra. Ruth speaking Hebrew]

I've already kissed your mezuzah.

[in English] Welcome, welcome.

[Dra. Ruth in Hebrew]
Do you have dogs or not?

[Shmil] I don't have dogs.

[in English] No, okay.

[in Hebrew]
This is an Israeli paratrooper's beret.

is a gift for you.

[people scream]

[young Ruth] The political situation
in Palestine it is increasingly tense.

Since the UN left the country
in separate states,

a guerrilla has awakened
between Jews and Arabs.

In Germany I saw firsthand

what happens to the Jews
when they don't have their own country.

So I have completed my training
as a Haganah sniper,

the Jewish underground army.

In practice, I hit the target
almost every attempt.

Last night I was on a roof
with a machine gun

watching Israeli soldiers
who checked each car for weapons.

My job as a sniper
is to call if something happens.

And shoot if necessary.

Thank God I never had
than shoot anyone.

That makes me very sad.

Who knows how many people this killed?

It's enough.

[Dra. Ruth] June 4, 1948,
my 20th birthday.

I was coming back from my shift
as a sniper on the roof

and when I got to this building,

The alarm went off and I knew what it meant.

It meant that there was
to go to a shelter.

- [an alarm rings]
- [heavy breathing]

[loud crack]

[explosion]

[Dra. Ruth] A cannonball hit
and threw me

against the wall,

and killed some girls next to me.

It was a very horrible scene

screaming, blood everywhere,

and then silence.

A friend opened my shoes.

And I looked down and saw a lot of blood.

I asked him if I would die.

Then they took me to the hospital
of the city.

The wounds on my little feet
they were horrible.

My foot had almost been blown off.

The top was all twisted.

I almost had both legs amputated.

In the basement there were beds and beds
with wounded soldiers.

There wasn't even a hole for me.

They put me on a book shelf
because it was so small.

I had a very handsome male nurse.

And I made her believe that she couldn't
feed myself.

Lie. My hands
they were perfectly fine,

but that's how he fed me
three times a day.

And he fixed me so well that all my life

I was able to water ski,

skiing in the snow,

ice skating,

and I can still dance all night
if I find a good partner.

Ryan, I want you to show
that I can walk fast.

Well then you write
something else in that book

And that's when you should say goodbye

Dr. Ruth, how do you know
when to stay or go?

Jonathan, I think inside your soul

now you know.

To the people who feel

that is not in a good relationship,

I suggest therapy.

Do something to make it work.

If not,

at least separate,
to start a new life.

- [Jonathan] Mmh.
- I speak from experience.

I got married three times.

But only my last marriage
that lasted almost 40 years,

with Fred Westheimer,
it was the real marriage.

I tell people

"I do not speak only from the theory,
I've really lived it. "

The first husband
it was David Bar-haim.

He was an Israeli soldier.
He was handsome.

He was smart.

he thought: "what luck",

because I thought that no one
she would marry me.

I'm short, I thought she was ugly.

she went to study medicine
at the University of Paris,

and I went to Paris with him.

The Sorbonne had a rule.

Those who did not have a high school diploma

because of the war,
they could do a preparatory year.

And if they passed the exams,
they could enter La Sorbonne.

My father valued education
more than anything,

and I wanted to continue my studies.

I entered La Sorbonne.

I studied at the institute of psychology
and I adored it.

I remember the Salrecheuer

where I heard classes
from greats like Piaget,

Nagash.

I was very short,

the auditorium was packed,

and knew how to find
a tall handsome guy

put me on the windowsill
near the teacher.

He was listening very well.

I took notes and passed the exams.

While studying,

it was clear that David
he didn't want to continue studying medicine.

He wanted to return to his life in Israel.

He believed that marriage
it would last forever,

but I wanted to study.

So he agreed to divorce.

Then, in Paris, I met

to husband number two.

His name was Dan, he was beautiful.

We had an affair.

And then I got married. Not,

I got pregnant first.

Then I got married, because when you get pregnant,
You get married.

When Miriam was born I was delighted.

Having grown up without a family,

that beautiful little baby

it was pure joy.

All my life I had wanted hard

go to the US, but I thought I would never
I would have enough money.

However, there was a check
that gave automatically

to all those who had not finished
Holocaust studies.

Suddenly I had $ 1500, and I said to Dan:

"We're going to the US".
We went on a ship called Liberté.

In fourth class, at the bottom of everything.

They prevented us from going up,
we were supposed to stay in our class.

I thought: "Wait, they won't tell me
I can't go to first class. "

So we broke all the rules

and we stay there every night

so as not to lose sight
of the Statue of Liberty.

I knew the poem by Emma Lazarus,

"Give me your tired masses,
poor, piled up ".

And when I saw that miracle in heaven,

the symbol of Freedom
for refugees,

I knew he was home.

I wanted to show you.

I vote, of course.

Since I am now a US citizen,
I have always voted,

but I'm not talking about politics.

Someone who talks about sex as much as I do

It must be on the fringes of politics.

However...

Here's a cartoon of ...

of the most widely read newspaper in Israel.

I tell the presidents
from North Korea and the US:

"Don't worry, size doesn't matter."

From the beginning,
I never went to television

to talk about politics.

[reporter] Dr. Ruth, what do you think
of Trump's sexual comments?

No, no comment.

[Leora] She doesn't talk about politics in public.

He has his ideas, I think it's not difficult
know what they are.

But she doesn't want her patients

or her followers think they can't
trust her for her political ideas.

[Joel] Of course it is
in a different way of understanding

what is politics, right?

[Dra. Ruth] she called a woman,
terribly upset because ...

... you must have an abortion.

I certainly believe that abortion
it must be kept legal.

I'm not talking about politics,

but I never got engaged

in many topics
including abortion.

FAMILY PLANNING
DECEIVES WOMEN

Even when it wasn't popular.

I am convinced that the law will fall
at the end of this presidency

and the murder of children will return
to hell where it came from.

I can't stop thinking if those who ask
the right to choose

they stop to think

that the fetus, the unborn child,
he never had that right.

It bothers me that the abortion problem
has become a political football.

OXFORD UNION ABORTION DEBATE

I will be very upset if the abortion
is outlawed again, because ...

Before legalization, only women
with money they could get an abortion.

Going back to those years would be terrible,

because there would be miscarriages
and hangers would be used again.

I think abortion
it should continue to be available.

[applause]

[John] She is very diligent
to avoid politicization.

JOHN LOLLOS VOICE
TELEVISION PRODUCER OF DRA. RUTH

He just said: "I'm not a politician,
I'm a sex therapist.

I'll stay there ".

Tell me what happens.

Well, since the abortion, I feel ...

i feel so depressed.

Now I think I was wrong.

[Dra. Ruth] Do you usually use contraceptives?

- [Laura] Oh yeah.
- [Dra. Ruth] Well this

It was a contraceptive failure.

Do not blame yourself
for not being responsible, Laura.

[Joel] she is political in the sense
that she has a social and political impact

VOICE OF JOEL WESTHEIMER
SON OF DOCTOR RUTH

... tremendous in the world.

And he is able to reach people
on a very human level

that transcends convictions
political or religious

because he speaks to them as human beings.

[Dra. Ruth] When Dan and I
we arrived in New York

WASHINGTON HEIGHTS, NEW YORK

... we lived in an apartment here

on the third floor and ...

in a single room.

Shortly after we settled down,

I realized that Dan and I
we couldn't be together.

I was very bored

because he was not an intellectual.

We had an old car.
I gave him the car and I kept the girl.

she Suddenly she was a single mother

in a country with a language he did not know.

It was difficult raising Miriam alone.

She made $ 1 an hour working as a maid.

But she needed to learn English fast.

So she read romance novels,

because I always wanted to read them to the end
to find out what happened.

[laughs]

I don't remember any other single mother
in the fifties.

She was very poor, she really had no money,

but that didn't stop me from having fun.

She had parties every weekend.

Everyone bought food.

I only bought potato chips.

[Miriam] I remember myself as the only girl ...

VOICE OF MIRIAM WESTHEIMER
DAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH

... in a room full of adults

that they danced, they spoke
and they had a good time.

Because he took me everywhere
where she was going.

[Dra. Ruth] And when she got tired
she put her on the bed

and surrounded her with sacks
so that she wouldn't fall

and she slept in the middle of the noise.

Maybe I was a pioneer
of single mothers.

Boy, this is serious.

[Michal] I think I was wrong.

GRANDCHILDREN OF DR. RUTH

[Dra. Ruth] I never let them win
to their parents, never.

- [Leora] Why not?
- Because they must learn to lose.

Prince and queen. Good move!

- Moment, moment, moment
- [man speaks]

- [Leora] Bye. [laughs]
- Oh God.

- It's terrible, they took me by assault.
- Well, can we shake hands?

[Dra. Ruth] The hands. What grandchildren
I have so ready. Bravo.

Look at this,

these are my grandchildren,
all four of them ski.

I loved skiing
and she was a very good skier.

Actually, that's how I met Fred.

One of my friends had a car,

so we collected money as a group

and we left my girl with friends,

and we would go skiing for the weekend.

MEINSTEIN ACCOMMODATION - SKIERS

He had a friend named Hans

and Hans and I climbed up the trailer

that takes you up the mountain.

But he was so tall that when he was behind
it was on his ankle,

and when I was behind,
it was on my neck, it was impossible.

In the mountain someone introduced me

to Manfred Westheimer,
head of the Jewish ski club,

I was in the same accommodation.

I looked at that little man

and I said to Hans: "I'll go up the mountain
with that little guy. "

Not as low as me
but nobody is as short as me.

On the way up I knew he was 35

he had never married, he was an engineer,

and I liked it right away, and right there
I decided that I would marry him.

I had to share a room
with another woman in the group.

When i walked into the room
at two O'clock in the morning,

because Fred and I had
spent the night talking,

he told me: "Keep your hands off that guy,

is mine ".

I smiled and said, "We'll see."

Guess what, I married him.

[phone click]

Hello, you are on the air.

[George] Hello Dr. Ruth, my name is George.
- Hello George.

[George] I'm dating a lady
who has two children.

Yes, is she divorced?

- [George] Yes.
- Well.

[George] And I love her very much.

Yes.

[George] And she has had
two bad relationships.

AHA.

[George] And I wonder, in what class
we could get into trouble

if we go ahead with this?

Yes, George, that she had
two bad relationships

does not mean that the third
it can't be fantastic.

So predict
horrible things will happen

it's not going to be of much help.

And I heard you say George

i heard you say
that you love her very much.

[George]
Yes, I do.

Then I wouldn't worry about the past.

Take a sponge and clean.

[Diane]
This is your third marriage, right?

- Yes, but now I'm married to him.
- [Diane] It didn't go well the first time.

[Dra. Ruth] It's true,
but I've been married for 23 years.

- Almost 24.
- It's a long time.

- [Diane] Do you think it will last?
- I think so.

[Dra. Ruth] My first two marriages
They were legalized romances.

But with Freddie it was true love.

He adopted and adored my daughter Miriam.

And together we had our son Joel.

We needed a bigger house
and that's why we moved to the site

where I have lived all these years.

Even after converting
at Dr. Ruth, I'm glad to be here.

Because this is my home.

[the doorbell rings]

Excuse me a moment.

[surprised laugh]

- Did someone order a pizza?
- Well, we have pizza.

- My Joel!
- I'm sure you wanted pizza.

My Joel, my Joel is here.

They can go home.

[Joel laughs]

[Dra. Ruth] I want to show you something.
I found an album.

Well I don't know who that is
maybe a lover ...

- I don't remember.
- [Joel laughs]

That's my Joel!

You were the cutest baby in the world.

And when will you get rid of that thing?

- Ring?
- A hundred years ago,

Joel appears in Oscawana
and I see a hoop.

I didn't speak to him for two and a half hours.

I think it was two days.

So now everyone will go
and I will be very sad.

It was very sad when
you four went.

[Joel] I know. It was so cute
we were all here.

- But the apartment was so empty.
- [Joel] Yes.

I'm not a grandmother in a rocking chair

waiting for her grandchildren to arrive,

but i don't like having them here
and be alone suddenly.

No, she doesn't like being alone.

- [Dra. Ruth] No, I won't sit here alone.
- You have learned that, right?

What I remember from when I was a child
is that she was

a tornado of activity.

You got up on Saturday morning
and there was already a plan.

- Certain.
- I mean, we were going skiing

or over there, or to do that other.

There was always a kind of energy.

But, at the same time, always
she was taking care of her career.

Or if. A mother at home
she is probably

as opposed to our mother as possible.

[Dra. Ruth] I really believe
that she would not have been a good mother

if she hadn't had

academic interests and a job.

I had a position in Family Planning
from New York,

that in those years she was not
as well known as now.

She worked in East Harlem, which at that time
it was the worst.

[Joel] He traveled all day
asking to be brought closer,

taking public transport.

I remember that he left many nights
and my dad,

that for me always
He was a stable engineer,

made dinner and stuff.

[Dra. Ruth]
I trained paraprofessionals,

people without secondary degree,

as family planning counselors.
And I loved him.

That increased my interest
on the subject of family planning.

[Miriam] At home, he didn't talk to us much
about sexuality.

He always wore some kind of equipment
Birth Control Planning.

So in my little girls' school,
when we had sex ed,

I was the only one who could
take the team and say:

"This is an IUD, this is a condom."

I think I learned it from being there.

[Joel] I don't remember having it
a big talk with me.

I left on purpose
a lot of books with information,

and I would pick them up.

[Dra. Ruth] Since I was young,

the most important thing for me
it was education.

That is why, in 1967,

I started my doctorate
at Teachers College in Columbia.

For that job in Family Planning
I used the data

out of 2000 women

and your contraceptive records
and abortions when it was illegal

for my doctoral dissertation.

And I was 42 when I got my PhD.

While I was in Harlem,
in Family Planning,

people were asking me questions.

Questions about premature ejaculation.

Inability to orgasm.

In all that area of sexuality

I couldn't answer.

I discovered that I didn't know enough.

I needed more training.

At Cornell University
there was a famous sex therapist,

Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan.

she was the first to develop
a methodology

to treat sexual dysfunction.

Sex therapy is indeed
a complex branch of psychiatry.

But the basic principle in a woman
that she can't have orgasms

is to teach him to have
an orgasm by itself.

[Dra. Ruth] I was accepted into the program
by Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan

to learn sex therapy.

And I thought, "I'm in heaven."

According to Jewish tradition,

the word "know" in Hebrew is ladat,

meet someone.

It also means "sex,"
which is fantastic,

because the word "sex"
means getting to know each other.

It means taking time to listen
and to talk to the other.

By not having parents since the age of ten,

I was very aware of the importance

to be touched and loved.

It was for that reason that I became so interested

on family issues
and relationships

and, over time, sexuality.

Working with Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan
I learned the job.

We sat in a room with a mirror
by which you could see

and we did sex therapy.

I worked with her
at Cornell for seven years.

It was an absolute dream,
work on professional help.

I had finished my studies
and I had my private practice,

doing psychosexual therapy
and relationship therapy.

Until 1981 ...

Very well!

Hello! How are you?

[Dra. Ruth] ... that was the year
everything changed for me.

- You look wonderful, you haven't changed.
- [Dra. Ruth] You look good.
This is Betty Elam.

Without her, I wouldn't be Dr. Ruth.

she was still in the body
from Cornell Medical Center

with Dr. Helen Singer Kaplan,

when a letter came to the program,
to see if someone could speak

on the need for sex education.

Nobody wanted to go
because they didn't pay money.

- They didn't pay.
- Correct.

WYNY COMMUNITY AFFAIRS

- [Dra. Ruth] I saw the letter
And I said, "I'll go."
- Yes.

- [Dra. Ruth] "I'll blow up a balloon."
- Correct.

CENTRAL WYNY OFFICES
ROCKEFELLER PLAZA 30

[radio introduction]
Ninety-seven

W, Y, N, Y.

[man] Let's look
the weather of the weekend.

[Maurice] I remember Betty
she came running to the station,

and said to the general manager:

"You won't believe this woman
I met today ...

VOICE OF MAURICE TUNICK
WYNY STATION MANAGER

... is this size,

has a very strong German accent

and talk about sex like no one before.

I think we should do something with it. "

Frankly, it wasn't our priority,
we were a music station.

But at that time the radios
who received the license

should provide community services
a certain number of hours.

And most radios
assigned programs

when few people listened.

[Betty] It had never been done
a program like that.

and I had many tug of war,
but well.

If you are a woman in this business,
you're used to it.

And Ruth can be very charming,
besides that she has a good education.

So we were able to give it a try
a Speaking of Sex.

[woman speaking]

FORMAT
"TALKING ABOUT SEX"

[Maurice] The show was done in 30 rock.

She had never done radio before.

And the lawyers were
very nervous about that,

very nervous about advice.

And the program would be recorded,
to be able to edit

anything uncomfortable.

Good night,
I am Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

Our program is called
Let's talk about Sex.

IN THE AIR

Hello, are you still there? You're next.

VOICE OF SUSAN BROWN
WYNY PRODUCER

We went to the study
and we had 12 phone lines,

and answered. "Hello, Let's talk about sex,

do you have any questions? "

She wanted the element of surprise.

The first time she heard the question
It was her when she pressed the button.

- Let's talk about Sex. You're on the air.
- [John] Hello, Dr. Ruth.

- Yes.
- [John] My name is John I'm from Georgia,

- and I have some kind of problem.
- Let me hear it.

[Maurice] We recorded the show on Thursdays,

we went on the air on Sunday nights,

because there was nothing there.

12:00 - "LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX"
WITH DR. RUTH WESTHEIMER

You know, who's awake
Sunday at midnight?

It was a dead hour,
perfect for a show

which makes you a little nervous.

I know a guy
that only has erections

when your partner wears high heels.

[Maurice] In those days, on NBC
you could sit in a study and consult

any other study
to hear what they were doing.

We didn't do promotions,

but, apparently, by word of mouth,

and suddenly we knew that on Thursdays ...

[Dra. Ruth] Hello, you are in the air.

[Maurice] ... everything stopped at NBC

because people listened
Ruth's recording for WYNY.

- [Jeff] Hello, Dr. Ruth.
- [Dra. Ruth] Yes?

[Jeff] I heard a woman
she only has so many orgasms

- in her life.
- [Dra. Ruth] God forbid. [laughs]

It's a rumor that I hadn't heard,
listen carefully, Jeff.

[Maurice] she was different from all trials
morales back then in the United States.

There was no one you could talk to
of that kind of thing.

And, suddenly, there was this woman
on the radio, responding directly.

- You have to...
- [Woman] If she knew she was pregnant

- I don't know what would have happened.
- Good, but you need to talk to someone.

When people started calling
couldn't tell Westheimer.

He is a long name and he is not American.

They called and said "Dr. Ruth."

WYNY STATION MANAGER

She said, "Okay, Dr. Ruth."

Now famous people
from television and radio

[man] They are all a name.

[Dra. Ruth] Everyone uses first name.

But I tell you that I was the first.

We will return to the calls
in just a moment.

[Betty Elam] Everyone was excited
at the station.

I asked them if I could do it live.

And they said yes.

IN THE AIR.

[Maurice] We spent fifteen minutes
one hour, then two hours.

[Dra. Ruth] Sunday nights
the people coming back from the Hamptons

she got in the car at 10.

[man] he was lying on the bed
reading a Playgirl

and I only had underwear on hand
from my partner's girlfriend,

I was jerking off,
and my housemate came in.

[woman] I have a vibrator,
and I've reached the point

where do I prefer to use it
than dating men.

[Dra. Ruth] Yes.

[man] My penis is extremely large,

- like 35 centimeters ...
- [Dra. Ruth] Aha.

[man] ... and most of the girls
I go out with

they seem intimidated
with the size of my penis.

[Dra. Ruth] At 12 o'clock they were already
back in New York.

Said that meant that you were already
sexually aroused

By the time you got home

CONDUCTOR "GRANDMA FREUD"
FAVORITE AMONG NEW YORKERS

[Maurice] Frankly,
we didn't expect it to explode like this.

It started out as "a good idea".

But I think nobody thought
that would make a difference

between success and failure
from the radio station.

Turns out we were known for her.

We were Dr. Ruth's radio.

In a year, there were more people

listening to Ruth on Sunday night

than on the morning radios.
Something unusual.

NBC HIRES DR. RUTH WESTHEIMER

Ruthless people
IT IS THE WORST LOVER.

THE NEW PROGRAM OF DR. RUTH

[Joel] She wasn't really well known
until I went to college.

In my freshman year, I remember it was Sunday
and I went back to the bedroom ...

[Dra. Ruth] There are many women
they would read Playboy for fun!

[Joel] And I heard my mother's voice
in eight different radios,

scattered around the room, and I was surprised
a lot, "Mom"?

IT'S 10 AM - DO YOU KNOW
WHAT ARE YOUR CHILDREN LISTENING TO?

[Pierre] Suddenly received
tons of media attention ...

A VOICE OF "SEXUAL LITERACY"

... and a story from the New York Times
a book contract emerged.

THE GOOD SEX OF DR. RUTH

And he started traveling and teaching.

Then came the evening shows.
Letterman loved her,

Arsenio loved her, Carson loved her.

There are myths that everyone heard
and they give laughter, about going blind ...

Or grow hair on your palms.

- Yes, those things.
- You lose your hair.

- All that.
- [audience laughs]

PEOPLE
GOOD SEX WITH DR. RUTH!

[Pierre] Everyone loved her.

Next.

[Pierre] I used to go out in all
class of programs , Quantum Leap,

The lives of the Rich and Famous,
Hollywood Squares.

Then he started doing commercials,

made one with Pepsi, with Bo Jackson,

And one of Herbal Essence
that attracted attention.

If you think that's good,
try the shower gel!

[Pierre] she started an acting career .

That is a kiss?

[laughs]

[Pierre] she had a comedy ,
Dr. Ruth's house.

She was in a movie
with Gerard Depardieu and Sigourney Weaver.

[both in French]

She even had her own board game.

DR. RUTH
GOOD SEX GAME

[Maurice] He went from being a person
more of New York

that goes everywhere by metro

someone they were taking

and they paid him to show up.

[Pierre] And then of course
had its own programs.

GOOD SEX

THE SHOW OF DR. RUTH

After that, he couldn't walk anymore
three meters without being stopped

to ask you questions.

I enjoy it, I always watch
her program and all that.

[Pierre] she exploded.

[Susan] And he said we're not going
to let the business change us.

Because one day she could leave
and her line was:

"Poof, poof, this could all go away."

And today she is the same person.

Dr. Ruth, do you follow her advice
with her husband at home?

I never let it come
to the programs,

because she would say to you and Phil:
"Don't listen to her, she's pure talk!"

- That is first.
- [laughs]

[Diane] Is it true that what she says
is it pure chatter?

- It's a good line.
- [Diane laughs]

[Diane] Aren't you ashamed
there are jokes about Dr. Ruth?

And imitations of Dr. Ruth
on the Johnny Carson show?

Well imitation is the way
most sincere of compliment, they say.

No, I'm not ashamed. Her
she is very enterprising

and she is not frightened by any controversy,

whatever it is, and in this case it is sex.

If you can call it controversy.

[Dra. Ruth] This was the favorite bank
by Fred Westheimer.

He loved this park with passion.
He came almost every day.

One night in 1997,

I was coming back from a party
from the Academy Awards.

And Fred said to me, "Ruth, I had a stroke."

So I called an ambulance,

and they took him to a hospital.
He was in a coma for ten days.

He had a surgery,
they did everything possible,

but they couldn't save him and he died.

I was very sad because I would have
delighted to see his grandchildren grow up.

It was too early.

[Miriam] The only time I saw her cry

It was when my father died.

In his bed you know
he took his last breath, and ...

And I saw her cry.

And I never saw her cry on another occasion.

After someone's death
Jews keep Shivah.

It's a time of silence,
and you stay home seven days

thinking of the person,

but she did it for a couple of days
and then she went back to work.

[Joel] My mother had
many tragedies in her life.

She went through the Holocaust,
he lost his family,

he lost my father.

She is always committed
with her work.

You know, she's almost ninety

and she's always busy.

I think she does a part of that

because she loves what she does,

but I think she too ...

it is her survival mechanism.

I think she felt conscious
or unconsciously

that she had to choose between following

or be eaten.

[man] Are there parts of your past
you don't want to talk about?

Of course.

There are certain things that one does not share.

Not even with a husband
nor with her own children.

I give you an example,

my family was exterminated
in concentration camps.

And there are certain aspects of, uh,

the pain and loneliness
that I do not extend

because they are things
that no one can avoid.

[man] Thank you.

[Joel] It's easy for you and me to say

that she blocks her feelings,

or that she should be explored in depth.

[Miriam] But that's the way she is.

she So she survived

and whatever works
to live a life

as complete as yours ...

For me it's ok.

JUNE 4, 2018

90th BIRTHDAY OF DR. RUTH

[Dra. Ruth]
More flowers?

Oh God, who sent me that?

It's lovely.

Very well.

Don't take it for granted

the New York Times
the most important newspaper

In the USA.

On my birthday, on the front page,

not buried in an internal hole.

Look at this.

Oh.

"At 90, he still talks about sex

From morning to night".

Okay, come on, come on.

[laughs]

I remember

when she was nine and a half,

before leaving Frankfurt for Switzerland,

there was a book
in my parents' library,

on the last shelf,

and when no one was home
I was climbing to look for it.

It was called The Ideal Marriage.

And I saw that book with sexual positions

and I said:
"This is what my parents do!"

So my parents,

even though they didn't have a chance
to meet me later ...

They helped me to be who I am today.

- Thanks, Vincent.
- No problem.

- [Dra. Ruth] Make sure
that they give you to eat.
- Well.

MUSEUM OF JEWISH HERITAGE

[Michal]
They often ask

what is it like to be grandchildren
by Dr. Ruth.

Well, it's having a grandmother
which is very funny,

that she walks, skis, nothing ...

MICHAL LECKIE
GRANDDAUGHTER OF DR. RUTH

... and who gives them great advice
to his grandchildren.

Happy ninety to our wonderful Omi.

Those who know Ruth well know

that she doesn't speak
of her profession with her family.

GRANDSON OF DR. RUTH

There is an exception in fourth grade,

when she gave a full class
sex education

to all my class
from Riverdale Country School.

[laughs]

I still haven't recovered.

No kidding, happy nineties, Omi.

I feel very lucky to be your grandson,

and to think that
millions of people

they are lucky to follow your advice.

Ruth became Dr. Ruth
in the eighties...

FRIEND OF DR. RUTH

... but thirty years later

she continues to educate us

and inspiring everyone.

Tonight we have a chance

to tell you how much impact

you and your life still have.

That you meet many more
healthy years.

Grandchildren!

When I look back,

It was exactly 70 years ago,
on my twentieth birthday

who wounded me in Jerusalem,

where I could have
lose both legs.

And eighty years ago

I left Frankfurt am Main

because of the Nazis.

If I could talk to that girl now,

she would tell him: "Despite the fact

that you experienced some tragic events,

look what happened to you in life ".

Friends, did you eat anything?

Goodbye!

Hold my hand, please.

Very well.

- You ate?
- [man] Yes.

[Dra. Ruth]
For my past,

the things that I've overcome,

I have an obligation to live large

and leave a mark on the world.

- Well.
- Well.

[Dra. Ruth]
Oh I see a rainbow

Take the rainbow!

Rainbows bring good luck.

Look, I see cows.

One, two, a lot of them.

Fred Westheimer would have wanted to stop
to talk to them.

Look at that snow.

[man laughs]

Snow in August!

There is an American term

that I don't use,
but i will use now.

"Warming penises".

You never heard me use it, did you?

You have to discuss that.

Ryan, you must try this.

Something special.

Who else in the world has a friend

that he is a great lawyer?

Can I tell you how much you earn?

Not.

[Dra. Ruth]
I know how much you earn per hour.

I will not say.

The last. Eat, Ryan.

- [Dra. Ruth] Do you hear me?
- [Jacobson] Yes, you sound beautiful.

[Dra. Ruth]
Well.

I just have to remember
which is on all the time.

There is a lot of cow poop! Whoops!

I have two dollhouses
In New York,

and i need one of those.

I love everything that is small
and perfect like me.

[The door opens]

[Dra. Ruth] Hi, I'm here!

Where is the cameraman?

Look what I brought you!

Look what I stole for you.

Some sweets for everyone.

[Greg] Borrowed.

[Dra. Ruth] No, it's not a loan.
You can eat it.

[laughter]

[Ryan] You said the last one.

Other?

[interviewer] Why
still posting at 89?

What a stupid question!

Next question.

Although I speak from morning to night

actually
I am a very reserved person.

You won't know how much money I have

And you won't know who I'm sleeping with either.

- That's all. Goodbye!
- [laughs]