Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,969 --> 00:00:04,347
PREVIOUSLY ON...
2
00:00:04,371 --> 00:00:06,148
I WAS JUST THINKING...
I'M LEAVING...
3
00:00:06,172 --> 00:00:08,752
DO YOU WANT TO SPLIT A CAB?
4
00:00:08,776 --> 00:00:11,621
ACTUALLY, I THOUGHT
I'D TAKE A WALK.
5
00:00:11,645 --> 00:00:14,157
O.K. DO YOU WANT
TO SPLIT A WALK?
6
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:15,558
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?
7
00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:16,993
I DON'T KNOW.
8
00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:19,329
I REALLY WANTED TO GO WITH HER.
9
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:21,920
JAMIE AND I AREN'T DOING
SO GREAT RIGHT NOW.
10
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:29,839
WE HAVE TO TALK.
11
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:32,242
WE TOOK A WALK AROUND THE BLOCK.
12
00:00:32,266 --> 00:00:36,413
SHE GOT INTO A CAB,
AND I CAME HOME.
13
00:00:36,437 --> 00:00:38,181
BUT IT WASN'T JUST A WALK.
14
00:00:38,205 --> 00:00:40,484
I KISSED DOUG BERKUS.
15
00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:43,286
I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
16
00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:44,854
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
17
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:45,955
I DON'T KNOW.
18
00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:47,790
ARE YOU COMING
BACK? I DON'T KNOW.
19
00:00:47,814 --> 00:00:49,159
SHOULDN'T WE TALK ABOUT THIS?
20
00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:52,562
NO. I CAN'T TALK ABOUT
THIS NOW. I CAN'T... TALK.
21
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:54,064
O.K., WAIT, JUST WAIT.
22
00:00:54,088 --> 00:00:56,532
WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN
NOW? WHAT HAPPENS NOW?
23
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:58,876
I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW.
24
00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:00,900
I'M... I'M...
25
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:03,789
I DON'T KNOW.
26
00:01:14,275 --> 00:01:16,253
[WOMAN] OHH! [KNOCK ON DOOR]
27
00:01:16,277 --> 00:01:17,320
OH, NO.
28
00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:18,621
[IRA] WHO IS IT?
29
00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:20,824
[PAUL] IT'S ME,
SPLINKY. OPEN UP.
30
00:01:20,848 --> 00:01:24,361
PAULIE, YOU KNOW
WHAT TIME IT IS?
31
00:01:24,385 --> 00:01:26,851
IT'S TIME FOR YOU
TO OPEN THE DOOR.
32
00:01:28,722 --> 00:01:30,133
COME ON.
33
00:01:30,157 --> 00:01:31,468
WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING IN THERE?
34
00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:33,492
NOTHING. WHAT THE HELL
IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?
35
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:37,507
OH, NO.
36
00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:38,541
YEP.
37
00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:40,243
PAULIE, I TOLD YOU
NOT TO TELL HER.
38
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,412
I DIDN'T LISTEN TO YOU, AND...
39
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,848
I DIDN'T ACTUALLY
TELL HER. I TRIED.
40
00:01:45,872 --> 00:01:47,350
BEFORE I COULD TELL HER,
41
00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:50,587
SHE TELLS ME SHE KISSED
THIS GUY IN HER OFFICE.
42
00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:53,689
YOU KNOW THIS GUY
BERKUS? WELL, SHE KISSED HIM.
43
00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:55,725
SHE DIDN'T ACTUALLY KISS HIM.
44
00:01:55,749 --> 00:01:58,160
HE KISSED HER, BUT SHE
DIDN'T EXACTLY STOP IT.
45
00:01:58,184 --> 00:01:59,795
SO WELCOME TO MY LIFE.
46
00:01:59,819 --> 00:02:02,565
HEY! NAKED GIRL.
47
00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:04,400
DO YOU SEE WHAT'S GOING
ON BEHIND YOUR COUCH?
48
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:05,935
PAULIE, THIS IS JOYCE.
49
00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:07,737
JOYCE, THIS IS MY COUSIN PAUL.
50
00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:09,004
HI. HI, PAUL.
51
00:02:09,028 --> 00:02:10,507
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
52
00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:12,508
EXCUSE ME. SORRY.
53
00:02:12,532 --> 00:02:14,911
DO YOU STILL HAVE
THOSE FAT-FREE COOKIES?
54
00:02:14,935 --> 00:02:17,375
YEAH. ON THE SHELF,
NEXT TO THE CHIPS.
55
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:42,105
NO. STAY, STAY. JUST...
I CAN'T FIND THEM.
56
00:02:42,129 --> 00:02:45,408
THEY'RE UNDERNEATH THE GOOD
COOKIES... THE ONES WITH THE FAT.
57
00:02:45,432 --> 00:02:47,277
EVERYTHING'S SO DIFFERENT NOW.
58
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,579
THE AIR'S A DIFFERENT COLOR.
59
00:02:49,603 --> 00:02:51,381
I FEEL SO TOTALLY OFF.
60
00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:53,649
I WAS WALKING HERE... I
CAN'T CATCH MY BREATH.
61
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:56,653
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
62
00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:59,055
WE'RE GOING TO
FIGURE IT OUT. I PROMISE.
63
00:02:59,079 --> 00:03:01,958
WHAT GOOD COOKIES WITH THE FAT?
64
00:03:01,982 --> 00:03:04,222
JUST A SECOND. ALL RIGHT?
65
00:03:11,625 --> 00:03:13,069
YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY?
66
00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:14,426
I GAVE HIM THOSE SHEETS.
67
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:20,410
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
68
00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:21,967
COME IN! IT'S OPEN!
69
00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:26,249
HI, JAMIE. WANT TO PLAY TWISTER?
70
00:03:26,273 --> 00:03:29,019
TWISTER? NO, THANKS.
71
00:03:29,043 --> 00:03:32,422
HOW ABOUT A THREE-WAY
GAME OF CHUTES AND LADDERS?
72
00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:33,589
MAYBE LATER.
73
00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:35,313
I'LL GO SET IT UP.
74
00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:38,894
LISA... HELP.
75
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:39,929
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
76
00:03:39,953 --> 00:03:40,963
I'M IN TROUBLE.
77
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:42,132
WHAT'S UP?
78
00:03:42,156 --> 00:03:44,935
I KISSED DOUG BERKUS.
79
00:03:44,959 --> 00:03:49,105
THAT GUY FROM THE
OFFICE? HE'S SO CUTE!
80
00:03:49,129 --> 00:03:51,408
O.K., REALLY NOT THE POINT.
81
00:03:51,432 --> 00:03:52,775
I KNOW.
82
00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:55,111
I MAY HAVE JUST SCREWED UP
83
00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:57,681
WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN
A VERY NICE LITTLE LIFE.
84
00:03:57,705 --> 00:03:58,848
HE'LL GET OVER IT.
85
00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:00,716
MINE. MY LIFE.
86
00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:03,019
ALL RIGHT. IT'S NOT
THE END OF THE WORLD.
87
00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:04,323
COME ON.
88
00:04:05,613 --> 00:04:10,059
YOU DIDN'T, UH... NO.
GOD. OF COURSE NOT.
89
00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:12,361
YOU'LL FEEL BAD
FOR A LITTLE BIT.
90
00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:14,064
YOU'LL GET OVER
IT. LIFE GOES ON.
91
00:04:14,088 --> 00:04:16,432
PAUL LEFT.
92
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:17,500
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
93
00:04:17,524 --> 00:04:19,068
I TOLD HIM WHAT HAPPENED.
94
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:21,103
HE GOT UPSET AND LEFT.
95
00:04:21,127 --> 00:04:23,540
I COULDN'T STAY IN
THE HOUSE ALONE.
96
00:04:23,564 --> 00:04:26,409
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
TO DO. WHAT DO I DO?
97
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:27,743
YOU'RE ASKING ME?
98
00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:29,066
YES.
99
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:34,150
COOL.
100
00:04:34,174 --> 00:04:35,385
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
101
00:04:35,409 --> 00:04:36,619
YEAH?
102
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:37,820
IS HE THERE?
103
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:39,055
YEAH. IS SHE THERE?
104
00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:40,223
UH-HUH.
105
00:04:40,247 --> 00:04:42,359
NOPE. DO YOU BELIEVE THIS?
106
00:04:42,383 --> 00:04:44,516
YOU PUT HER ON. I'LL PUT HIM ON.
107
00:04:46,219 --> 00:04:48,064
SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO HIM.
108
00:04:48,088 --> 00:04:49,732
SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU.
109
00:04:49,756 --> 00:04:51,834
SHE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO ME?
110
00:04:51,858 --> 00:04:55,905
NO, NO. I DON'T
WANT TO TALK TO HER.
111
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:58,041
HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO HER.
112
00:04:58,065 --> 00:05:00,276
WHAT? VERY MATURE.
113
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:03,979
HE SAYS HE DOESN'T
WANT TO TALK TO YOU.
114
00:05:04,003 --> 00:05:05,047
VERY MATURE.
115
00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:06,115
TOLD YOU.
116
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:08,017
THEY SAID YOU'RE VERY MATURE.
117
00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:12,588
VERY MATURE SARCASTIC,
OR VERY MATURE SINCERE?
118
00:05:12,612 --> 00:05:14,613
I'D HAVE TO GUESS SARCASTIC.
119
00:05:17,684 --> 00:05:21,064
I DON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE
TALKING TO HIM RIGHT NOW.
120
00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:22,031
HUH?
121
00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:23,132
HUH? WHAT?
122
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,067
WHAT? NEVER MIND.
123
00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:24,934
I DON'T KNOW. NEVER MIND.
124
00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:25,901
SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
125
00:05:25,925 --> 00:05:26,936
SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
126
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,704
SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOPELESS,
127
00:05:28,728 --> 00:05:30,973
OR SHE DOESN'T KNOW,
LIKE, AMBIVALENT?
128
00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,475
GET ON THE PHONE.
129
00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:33,810
NO, NO.
130
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,144
WHAT DID HE SAY?
HOLD ON A SECOND.
131
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:35,978
HOLD ON A SECOND.
132
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,046
I GOT NOTHING TO SAY TO HER.
133
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:38,915
HE HAS NOTHING TO SAY TO HER.
134
00:05:38,939 --> 00:05:40,249
HE HAS NOTHING TO SAY TO YOU.
135
00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:41,751
HE HAS NOTHING TO SAY TO ME?
136
00:05:41,775 --> 00:05:43,619
WHAT IS THERE TO SAY?
WHAT IS THERE TO SAY?
137
00:05:43,643 --> 00:05:46,289
A... SHE SHOULDN'T BE
TALKING TO ANYBODY NOW.
138
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:48,724
SHE SHOULDN'T BE TALKING AT ALL.
139
00:05:48,748 --> 00:05:50,527
SHE SHOULD LOOK INSIDE HER SOUL
140
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:53,129
FOR SOME ANSWERS TO
VERY STICKY QUESTIONS
141
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:55,130
ABOUT THE DEFINITION OF MARRIAGE
142
00:05:55,154 --> 00:05:58,735
AND PROPRIETY AND THE
CONSEQUENCES OF ACTIONS
143
00:05:58,759 --> 00:06:00,403
AND THE RAMIFICATIONS THEREOF.
144
00:06:00,427 --> 00:06:02,572
ANSWERS TO ALL KINDS OF STUFF.
145
00:06:02,596 --> 00:06:06,142
AND 2... AND DEUX...
IN A LARGER SENSE...
146
00:06:06,166 --> 00:06:07,610
WHAT KIND OF PERSON IS SHE?
147
00:06:07,634 --> 00:06:08,811
WHAT KIND OF PERSON IS SHE?
148
00:06:08,835 --> 00:06:11,714
WHO IS THIS WOMAN
THAT I THOUGHT I KNEW,
149
00:06:11,738 --> 00:06:15,684
WHO HAS MADE A MOCKERY OF
EVERYTHING THAT I HELD SACRED?
150
00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:18,388
AND WHEN WE MADE OUR
SACRED MARRIAGE VOWS...
151
00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:20,156
FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE,
152
00:06:20,180 --> 00:06:22,758
FOR SICKNESS OR FOR POORER...
153
00:06:22,782 --> 00:06:25,261
I DON'T RECALL
ANYBODY MAKING MENTION
154
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:27,297
OF THE BRIDE KISSING
DOUGLAS BERKUS.
155
00:06:27,321 --> 00:06:28,965
ABOUT THE BRIDE KISSING
THIS CLOWN BERKUS.
156
00:06:28,989 --> 00:06:31,000
AND I'LL TELL YOU,
157
00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:33,269
THE NERVE, THE UNMITIGATED GALL
158
00:06:33,293 --> 00:06:35,004
OF HER TEARING APART THIS UNION
159
00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,272
OUT OF PERSONAL WEAKNESS
160
00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:39,074
LEAVES ANY THINKING,
FEELING HUMAN BEING
161
00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:40,765
WITH A PIT IN THEIR STOMACH.
162
00:06:42,002 --> 00:06:45,148
AND TELL HER I WANT MY DOG BACK.
163
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:48,051
TELL HIM PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN GLASS
HOUSES SHOULDN'T THROW STONES,
164
00:06:48,075 --> 00:06:50,953
THAT NONE OF US IS PERFECT,
165
00:06:50,977 --> 00:06:54,490
AND UNTIL HE'S WALKED A MILE
IN MY SHOES, HE HAS NOT WALKED.
166
00:06:54,514 --> 00:06:57,014
BOY, ARE YOU IN TROUBLE.
167
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,597
AND TELL HIM IF HE STOPS BY THE
APARTMENT TO WATER THE PLANTS.
168
00:07:01,621 --> 00:07:04,133
AND ALSO I LEFT A FROZEN
CHICKEN ON THE COUNTER.
169
00:07:04,157 --> 00:07:05,868
IF HE WANTS TO PICK UP MURRAY,
170
00:07:05,892 --> 00:07:07,637
HE CAN COME BY MY OFFICE
AND GET HIM TOMORROW
171
00:07:07,661 --> 00:07:09,105
BEFORE HIS JOB INTERVIEW.
172
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:12,308
AND TELL HIM GOODBYE.
173
00:07:12,332 --> 00:07:14,243
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
174
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:16,746
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
175
00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,547
JUST TELL HER GOODBYE.
176
00:07:18,571 --> 00:07:19,571
GOODBYE.
177
00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:26,455
HEY.
178
00:07:26,479 --> 00:07:28,323
LOOK WHO'S LATE INSTEAD OF ME.
179
00:07:28,347 --> 00:07:30,660
WE COULDN'T GET ON THE SUBWAY.
180
00:07:30,684 --> 00:07:32,428
MURRAY WOULDN'T SAY
HE'S A SEEING EYE DOG.
181
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,863
PICK A BUTTON.
182
00:07:33,887 --> 00:07:35,397
THE BUTTONS.
183
00:07:35,421 --> 00:07:37,399
THAT'S RIGHT. THE BUTTONS.
184
00:07:37,423 --> 00:07:39,102
"BROCKWELL FOR MAYOR."
WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO SAY?
185
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:40,625
SEE YOU TOMORROW.
186
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:45,141
SO THIS IS MURRAY.
187
00:07:45,165 --> 00:07:46,309
YES.
188
00:07:46,333 --> 00:07:48,144
MURRAY, DOUG.
189
00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:49,212
DOUG, MURRAY.
190
00:07:49,236 --> 00:07:50,179
HI, MURRAY.
191
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:51,948
[DING]
192
00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:54,550
LISTEN, JAMIE, I, UH...
193
00:07:54,574 --> 00:07:57,920
HEY, CAN WE WAIT FOR THE
NEXT ONE? IS THAT ALL RIGHT?
194
00:07:57,944 --> 00:07:59,310
FOURTH FLOOR, PLEASE. O.K.
195
00:08:01,415 --> 00:08:03,993
UM, ABOUT YESTERDAY... DOUG...
196
00:08:04,017 --> 00:08:06,762
I DIDN'T SLEEP AT
ALL LAST NIGHT.
197
00:08:06,786 --> 00:08:09,932
THAT MAKES 17 OF US.
198
00:08:09,956 --> 00:08:12,802
LOOK, THIS THING THAT
HAPPENED... DOUG...
199
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:16,138
CAN I... PLEASE...
LET ME SAY THIS, O.K.?
200
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:19,576
UH, I THOUGHT IN THE
BACK OF MY CRAZY HEAD
201
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,912
THAT YOU WANTED ME TO.
202
00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,713
NOW, OBVIOUSLY, YOU
DIDN'T, BUT I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
203
00:08:24,737 --> 00:08:26,916
AND IF I HAD NEVER TRIED,
204
00:08:26,940 --> 00:08:29,385
I WOULD NEVER HAVE
FORGIVEN MYSELF. DOUG...
205
00:08:29,409 --> 00:08:34,657
REALLY, I'M... I'M VERY
EMBARRASSED ABOUT THIS, BUT...
206
00:08:34,681 --> 00:08:37,192
PLEASE KNOW THAT THIS WILL
NEVER, EVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
207
00:08:37,216 --> 00:08:39,328
NO, I KNOW.
208
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:42,531
I'M REALLY... AWFULLY
FOND OF YOU, JAMIE.
209
00:08:42,555 --> 00:08:44,934
I KNOW THAT.
210
00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:47,992
AND MAYBE IN ANOTHER
LIFE, UM... [DING]
211
00:08:55,335 --> 00:08:57,413
IF I THOUGHT WE
COULDN'T BE FRIENDS,
212
00:08:57,437 --> 00:08:59,415
I WOULD REALLY HATE THAT.
213
00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:01,283
MAYBE WE COULD PRETEND
THIS NEVER HAPPENED...
214
00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:02,385
I ALREADY TOLD PAUL.
215
00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:03,986
WHAT?
216
00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:05,354
I TOLD PAUL ABOUT IT.
217
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:06,489
WHY?
218
00:09:06,513 --> 00:09:07,523
BECAUSE I DID.
219
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:08,958
OH, GREAT.
220
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:10,426
THE STAIRS ARE FASTER.
221
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:11,794
I BET HE WANTS TO KILL ME.
222
00:09:11,818 --> 00:09:12,962
NO, HE DOESN'T.
223
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,906
I HOPE YOU CAN TELL HIM...
224
00:09:17,624 --> 00:09:19,002
HI.
225
00:09:19,026 --> 00:09:20,358
HI.
226
00:09:24,164 --> 00:09:25,174
OH.
227
00:09:25,198 --> 00:09:26,843
HI.
228
00:09:26,867 --> 00:09:27,867
HI.
229
00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:35,317
WELL...
230
00:09:35,341 --> 00:09:38,120
CAN ANYBODY THINK OF
ANYTHING MORE AWKWARD?
231
00:09:38,144 --> 00:09:40,523
HONEY.
232
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:42,425
OH, ME?
233
00:09:42,449 --> 00:09:43,859
YES, YOU.
234
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:44,982
I WASN'T SURE.
235
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:50,633
LISTEN, I THINK IT'S...
[BRAKES SCREECH]
236
00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:52,868
I REALLY DON'T THINK
237
00:09:52,892 --> 00:09:54,369
YOU SHOULD SAY
ANYTHING JUST NOW.
238
00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:55,538
IF I...
239
00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:58,807
AND I'M REALLY, REALLY
SURE ABOUT THAT FOR YOU.
240
00:09:58,831 --> 00:10:01,276
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING
ON BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU.
241
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:02,979
THINK THAT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS.
242
00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:05,114
THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON.
243
00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:06,915
I REALLY WOULDN'T
CALL IT NOTHING.
244
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:09,552
I SWEAR TO YOU, THERE'S
NOTHING GOING ON.
245
00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:12,421
LOOK HOW NICE
YOU BOTH GET ALONG.
246
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:14,290
[ALARM BELL RINGS]
247
00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:17,393
HONEY, THE SECURITY GUYS
COME IF THE ELEVATOR ST...
248
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:18,583
[RINGING STOPS]
249
00:10:24,857 --> 00:10:25,923
[DING]
250
00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:31,941
DO YOU WANT TO COME
IN AND TALK FOR A MINUTE?
251
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:34,944
NO. I JUST WANT TO TALK
TO DOUG FOR A SECOND.
252
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,979
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
253
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:38,869
I'M JUST GOING TO TALK TO DOUG.
254
00:10:58,057 --> 00:10:59,068
YOU MARRIED?
255
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:00,636
NO.
256
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,539
EVER BEEN MARRIED? NO.
257
00:11:03,563 --> 00:11:05,140
HMM.
258
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:07,542
BUT I KNOW THAT
IT IS NOT EASY TO...
259
00:11:07,566 --> 00:11:08,899
REALLY?
260
00:11:11,971 --> 00:11:14,216
YES. AND I WANT TO
SAY, PAUL, THAT I'M...
261
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,952
[BRAKES SCREECH]
262
00:11:15,976 --> 00:11:19,455
LISTEN, I KNOW THAT
WHATEVER IS WRONG,
263
00:11:19,479 --> 00:11:21,357
WHATEVER'S GOING
ON WITH JAMIE AND ME,
264
00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:22,691
THAT IS OUR PROBLEM.
265
00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:26,262
WE WILL FIX IT. THAT'S GOT
NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
266
00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:30,032
IT WAS WRONG, AND I
APOLOGIZE TO BOTH OF YOU.
267
00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:31,066
THAT'S VERY SWEET.
268
00:11:31,090 --> 00:11:32,402
I MEAN THAT, PAUL.
269
00:11:32,426 --> 00:11:35,805
I UNDERSTAND. THAT'S
AWFULLY CIVILIZED.
270
00:11:35,829 --> 00:11:37,907
AT THE SAME TIME, I
HAVE TO SAY TO YOU...
271
00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:39,374
AND I MEAN THIS
272
00:11:39,398 --> 00:11:44,213
WITH NOTHING BUT RESPECT
FOR YOU AS A PROFESSIONAL...
273
00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:48,384
IF YOU EVER TOUCH
MY WIFE AGAIN... I WON'T.
274
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,608
[ALARM BELL STARTS] I PROMISE.
275
00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:57,348
[BELL STOPS]
276
00:12:04,690 --> 00:12:07,403
DID YOU THINK I WAS
GOING TO HIT YOU?
277
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:09,238
YEAH, I DID.
278
00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:10,428
[DING]
279
00:12:11,498 --> 00:12:12,696
GOOD.
280
00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:22,099
MURRAY, I TOLD YOU
TO GO BEFORE WE LEFT.
281
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,387
DON'T GIVE ME THAT LOOK.
282
00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:26,589
UM, MR. BUCHMAN.
283
00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:28,090
HI. YES. PAUL.
284
00:12:28,114 --> 00:12:29,225
HI, PAUL.
285
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:31,060
I'M JANE PAULEY'S ASSISTANT. HI.
286
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,861
I SEE YOU BROUGHT A
LITTLE FRIEND ALONG.
287
00:12:32,885 --> 00:12:35,431
I HAD A SCHEDULING CONFLICT.
288
00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:37,766
I DON'T USUALLY BRING
A DOG TO AN INTERVIEW,
289
00:12:37,790 --> 00:12:39,835
ESPECIALLY A JOB
THAT I REALLY WANT.
290
00:12:39,859 --> 00:12:41,937
I'M VERY EXCITED ABOUT THIS JOB.
291
00:12:41,961 --> 00:12:44,273
9 OUT OF 10 INTERVIEWS,
THERE'S NO DOG.
292
00:12:44,297 --> 00:12:45,675
I'M ENTIRELY DOGLESS
THROUGHOUT THE INTERVIEW,
293
00:12:45,699 --> 00:12:47,810
NOT EVEN, LIKE, A PUPPY.
294
00:12:47,834 --> 00:12:51,576
MR. BUCHMAN, I THINK
YOUR DOG... OOH. OOH.
295
00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:55,818
I BEGGED YOU TO GO
BEFORE WE GOT HERE.
296
00:12:55,842 --> 00:12:58,654
I DON'T KNOW WHY
YOU DO THIS TO ME.
297
00:12:58,678 --> 00:13:00,611
WHY MAURY POVICH?
298
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:06,918
WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
299
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,389
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THIS?
300
00:13:18,998 --> 00:13:20,798
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
301
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:35,424
[SINGING]
302
00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:37,292
COME ON. RIGHT ON THE CARPET?
303
00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:39,061
RIGHT BETWEEN DATE AND LINE.
304
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:41,997
YOU AIN'T GOING TO GET THAT JOB.
305
00:13:42,021 --> 00:13:44,800
WHAT DID WE HAVE
IN THAT LAST BAR?
306
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:45,868
THE SPORTS BAR?
307
00:13:45,892 --> 00:13:46,969
NO. BEFORE THAT.
308
00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:48,204
YES. THE STRIP CLUB?
309
00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:49,438
IT WAS A MAI TAI.
310
00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:50,605
OW. THAT WAS THE BIG MISTAKE.
311
00:13:50,629 --> 00:13:54,610
BEST THING FOR THAT... COLD
BEER AND SOME KARAOKE.
312
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:57,412
THIS GUY'S SLEEPING
ON MY COUCH...
313
00:13:57,436 --> 00:13:59,648
3:00 IN THE MORNING
314
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,117
WATCHING FLIPPER IN HIS
UNDERWEAR AND CRYING.
315
00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:04,887
EXCUSE ME FOR HAVING EMOTIONS.
316
00:14:04,911 --> 00:14:07,223
YOU GUYS EVER HAVE A
MARRIAGE THAT FELL TO CRAP?
317
00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:09,358
YES. YEAH.
318
00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:11,793
ALL RIGHT, THEN. SO SHUT UP.
319
00:14:11,817 --> 00:14:14,252
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE US TO
DO TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?
320
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:18,601
I WOULD REALLY LIKE
TO PUNCH SOMEBODY.
321
00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:19,668
WHO... BERKUS?
322
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,069
FOR STARTERS, YEAH.
323
00:14:21,093 --> 00:14:22,438
YOU SHOULD HAVE.
324
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:23,538
WANT TO HIT ME?
325
00:14:23,562 --> 00:14:25,474
WHY? WHAT DID YOU DO?
326
00:14:25,498 --> 00:14:27,542
NOTHING. IT'S JUST A
RELEASE. YOU'LL FEEL BETTER.
327
00:14:27,566 --> 00:14:30,613
YOU WOULD LET ME HIT YOU?
328
00:14:30,637 --> 00:14:32,381
SURE. IF IT HELPS YOU.
329
00:14:32,405 --> 00:14:33,382
THANK YOU.
330
00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:34,416
YOU WANT TO?
331
00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:35,550
NAH. MAYBE LATER.
332
00:14:35,574 --> 00:14:38,120
COME ON, NOW. DO IT NOW.
333
00:14:38,144 --> 00:14:39,889
REALLY?
334
00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:41,278
YEAH. GO AHEAD. GO AHEAD.
335
00:14:44,016 --> 00:14:45,961
COME ON. THAT'S NOT A HIT.
336
00:14:45,985 --> 00:14:47,028
PAULIE, THAT'S NOT A HIT.
337
00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:48,664
OW! THAT'S A HIT.
338
00:14:48,688 --> 00:14:50,132
THERE YOU GO.
339
00:14:50,156 --> 00:14:52,134
ME, ME. WHAT ABOUT ME?
340
00:14:52,158 --> 00:14:54,070
YEAH! O.K., THERE. NOW...
341
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:55,304
NOW WE FEEL BETTER?
342
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:57,306
NOT ONE OUNCE.
343
00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:59,308
I WANT TO BE LIKE JAMIE.
344
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:00,843
I'D LIKE TO KISS SOMEBODY.
345
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,678
WANT TO KISS ME?
346
00:15:02,702 --> 00:15:04,546
YOU WOULD LET ME KISS YOU?
347
00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:05,848
SURE.
348
00:15:05,872 --> 00:15:07,683
I DON'T WANT TO KISS YOU.
349
00:15:07,707 --> 00:15:08,884
YOU'LL FEEL BETTER.
350
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:10,719
THAT HAS ZERO APPEAL TO ME.
351
00:15:10,743 --> 00:15:11,721
I UNDERSTAND.
352
00:15:11,745 --> 00:15:12,754
MAYBE LATER?
353
00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:14,189
MAYBE LATER.
354
00:15:14,213 --> 00:15:16,358
O.K.
355
00:15:16,382 --> 00:15:18,927
RIGHT THERE. THAT'S A
PERFECT EXAMPLE OF SOMEBODY
356
00:15:18,951 --> 00:15:20,529
THAT I WOULD LIKE TO KISS.
357
00:15:20,553 --> 00:15:21,997
SO GO AHEAD.
358
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:23,131
YOU'D LET ME?
359
00:15:23,155 --> 00:15:24,767
SURE. IF IT'LL HELP YOU.
360
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:26,635
YOU'RE SO GOOD TO ME.
361
00:15:26,659 --> 00:15:29,304
WELL, YOU KNOW,
I HATE TO NITPICK,
362
00:15:29,328 --> 00:15:31,073
BUT KISSING SOMEBODY
WOULDN'T MAKE YOU EVEN.
363
00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:32,675
WHY NOT?
364
00:15:32,699 --> 00:15:34,076
BECAUSE JAMES
DIDN'T KISS SOMEBODY.
365
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,444
SOMEBODY KISSED HER.
366
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:38,013
THE MAN HAS A POINT.
367
00:15:38,037 --> 00:15:41,183
TECHNICALLY, SOMEBODY
WOULD HAVE TO KISS YOU.
368
00:15:41,207 --> 00:15:44,419
THEN I COULD TAKE HALF AN
HOUR TO PUSH THEM AWAY,
369
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,054
PRETEND I DIDN'T ENJOY IT.
370
00:15:46,078 --> 00:15:48,791
HEY, COME ON. LET'S
BE FAIR TO JAMIE.
371
00:15:48,815 --> 00:15:52,360
THIS WAS A ONE-TIME
THING, AN ISOLATED INCIDENT.
372
00:15:52,384 --> 00:15:54,964
IT WAS A MOMENTARY LAPSE
OF JUDGMENT, OF WEAKNESS.
373
00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:56,899
IT'S NOT A CAPITAL CRIME.
374
00:15:56,923 --> 00:15:59,283
IN EUROPE, THIS HAPPENS
ALL THE TIME. MM-HMM.
375
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:03,004
WHERE?
376
00:16:03,028 --> 00:16:04,206
IN EUROPE.
377
00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:05,541
WHERE IN EUROPE?
378
00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:08,877
WHEREVER YOU
WANT... ITALY, FRANCE.
379
00:16:08,901 --> 00:16:10,445
YOU DON'T THINK IN FRANCE
THIS HAPPENS EVERY DAY?
380
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:12,415
OH. THE FRENCH DON'T CARE.
381
00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:14,049
IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.
382
00:16:14,073 --> 00:16:16,185
EVERY DAY, EVERY MINUTE.
383
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,954
BINGO. JUST HAPPENED.
384
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:22,124
A GUY IN MARSEILLES JUST
GRABBED ANOTHER GUY'S WIFE
385
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:23,625
RIGHT IN THE CROISSANT.
386
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,961
WHY CAN'T I DO THAT?
387
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:27,796
BECAUSE THAT'S NOT YOU.
388
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,265
THESE PEOPLE ARE FRENCH.
DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
389
00:16:29,289 --> 00:16:30,999
ALL RIGHT.
390
00:16:31,023 --> 00:16:32,635
WHAT ABOUT HER?
391
00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,403
WHAT ABOUT HER?
392
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:37,606
WHAT IF SHE KISSED ME
OUT OF HER OWN GOODWILL?
393
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:40,175
YOU'D BE ONE LUCKY MAN.
394
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:42,077
HERE YOU GO.
395
00:16:42,101 --> 00:16:44,547
HERE YOU GO, SWEETHEART.
396
00:16:44,571 --> 00:16:45,881
WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
397
00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:47,082
SANDRA.
398
00:16:47,106 --> 00:16:49,752
SANDRA, DO YOU KNOW
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY TODAY?
399
00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:51,186
OH. IS IT REALLY?
400
00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:52,888
YEP.
401
00:16:52,912 --> 00:16:54,778
WELL, HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
402
00:16:58,484 --> 00:17:00,862
SO, I TOOK A SHOT THERE.
403
00:17:00,886 --> 00:17:03,165
DON'T MAKE US DRAG YOU OUT.
404
00:17:03,189 --> 00:17:05,768
THAT'S THE DIFFERENCE...
I STOP AT THE LINE.
405
00:17:05,792 --> 00:17:08,570
I DANCE UP TO IT, SKATE NEAR IT.
406
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:10,672
I DON'T GO OVER THE LINE.
407
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:13,175
MY WIFE CATAPULTS
CLEAR ACROSS THE LINE.
408
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:15,177
JAMIE DOESN'T CATAPULT.
409
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:18,313
IF I HAD KNOWN, I WOULD'VE
ENJOYED MYSELF BEFORE.
410
00:17:18,337 --> 00:17:21,317
YOU FEEL GUILTY JUST
LOOKING ACROSS THE LINE.
411
00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:24,019
I HAVE NOTHING TO
SHOW FOR MY GUILT.
412
00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:26,588
I'M IN A LOSE-LOSE SITUATION.
413
00:17:26,612 --> 00:17:29,091
YOU THINK YOU'RE THE FIRST
COUPLE TO GO THROUGH THIS?
414
00:17:29,115 --> 00:17:31,594
FRAN AND I WENT THROUGH HELL.
415
00:17:31,618 --> 00:17:34,696
TWO YEARS SEPARATED... YOU WORK
THROUGH IT, AND IT BECOMES BETTER.
416
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,231
IT'S LIKE A BROKEN BONE.
417
00:17:36,255 --> 00:17:38,500
YOU RESET IT, AND SOMETIMES
418
00:17:38,524 --> 00:17:41,025
IT'S STRONGER THAN
BEFORE YOU BROKE IT.
419
00:17:44,431 --> 00:17:47,076
I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING
THAT'LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.
420
00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,277
FRAN AND I WERE JUST MARRIED.
421
00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:51,146
THERE'S THIS GUY
IN FRAN'S OFFICE.
422
00:17:51,170 --> 00:17:53,281
HE KEEPS CALLING
HER AND CALLING...
423
00:17:53,305 --> 00:17:55,618
NO, I'M SORRY. NO,
THAT WASN'T FRAN.
424
00:17:55,642 --> 00:17:57,586
THAT WAS ANOTHER
COUPLE... THE KOPACKS.
425
00:17:57,610 --> 00:17:58,553
THEY'RE FRIENDS OF OURS.
426
00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:00,823
FRAN TOLD ME...
427
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:02,491
YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M SAYING?
428
00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,393
WORK THINGS THROUGH.
IT GETS BETTER.
429
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,762
MARK, YOU'RE GOING
TO DEPRESS THE BOY.
430
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,799
WHOEVER ORDERED HANK
WILLIAMS, YOUR SONG IS UP.
431
00:18:09,823 --> 00:18:11,566
HERE WE GO. IT'S OUR TURN.
432
00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,102
JUST WHAT YOU NEED.
433
00:18:13,126 --> 00:18:14,936
A RELEASE. WHAT DO I NEED?
434
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,204
I DON'T SING.
435
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:19,174
YOU DON'T HAVE TO. JUST BE LOUD.
436
00:18:19,198 --> 00:18:22,711
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HERE'S A
LITTLE SONG FROM THE BIRTHDAY BOY.
437
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:23,746
THE LYRICS.
438
00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:25,547
MAKE A FOOL OF YOURSELF.
439
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:27,316
NO, NO, NO.
440
00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:31,220
♪ YOUR CHEATIN' HEART ♪
441
00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:32,888
♪ WILL MAKE YOU WEEP ♪
442
00:18:32,912 --> 00:18:34,790
I DON'T KNOW THESE GUYS.
443
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:38,693
♪ YOU'LL CRY AND CRY ♪
444
00:18:38,717 --> 00:18:42,831
♪ AND TRY TO SLEEP ♪
445
00:18:42,855 --> 00:18:46,702
♪ BUT SLEEP WON'T COME ♪
446
00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:48,404
♪ THE WHOLE NIGHT THROUGH ♪
447
00:18:48,428 --> 00:18:50,672
SING IT, PAUL! SING IT!
448
00:18:50,696 --> 00:18:54,210
♪ YOUR CHEATING HEART ♪
449
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,078
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
450
00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:58,313
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
451
00:18:58,337 --> 00:19:00,082
♪ YOUR CHEATING HEART ♪
452
00:19:00,106 --> 00:19:02,251
CHEATING HEART,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
453
00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:03,719
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
454
00:19:03,743 --> 00:19:06,121
JUST LIKE YOUR LITTLE SISTER!
455
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,123
♪ YOU'LL CRY AND CRY ♪
456
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,892
SOBBING, SOBBING!
457
00:19:09,916 --> 00:19:11,060
♪ THE WHOLE NIGHT THROUGH ♪
458
00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:13,062
THE WHOLE NIGHT THROUGH!
459
00:19:13,086 --> 00:19:15,130
[STAMMERS]
460
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:16,866
SING IT LIKE HE DOES!
461
00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:18,868
♪ THE WAY I DO ♪
462
00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:20,736
CLOP, CLOP, CLOP, CLOP, CLOP!
463
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:22,905
♪ YOUR CHEATING HEART ♪
464
00:19:22,929 --> 00:19:24,840
CHEATING HEART!
465
00:19:24,864 --> 00:19:26,742
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
466
00:19:26,766 --> 00:19:28,244
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
467
00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:30,212
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪
468
00:19:30,236 --> 00:19:32,314
WILL TELL ON YOU.
469
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:38,354
[BARBERSHOP HARMONIES]
♪ WILL TELL ON YOU ♪♪
470
00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:39,187
OH! THANK YOU!
471
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:40,789
YES!
472
00:19:40,813 --> 00:19:42,825
THANK YOU! GOOD NIGHT!
473
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:45,461
THERE YOU GO!
474
00:19:45,485 --> 00:19:47,062
VERY NICE, PAULIE.
475
00:19:47,086 --> 00:19:49,197
OH, WOW!
476
00:19:49,221 --> 00:19:52,581
THAT WAS REALLY
GREAT. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
477
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:58,307
THERE YOU GO. YOU HAPPY NOW?
478
00:19:58,331 --> 00:20:00,811
NO. THAT'S NOT WHAT
I HAD PLANNED AT ALL.
479
00:20:06,005 --> 00:20:07,449
RRR.
480
00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:08,783
AAH-HA!
481
00:20:08,807 --> 00:20:11,719
OW! WOW, THAT HURTS.
482
00:20:11,743 --> 00:20:13,655
WELL, THAT'S IT. IT'S OVER.
483
00:20:13,679 --> 00:20:16,258
IT'S BEEN A NICE CAREER.
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
484
00:20:16,282 --> 00:20:17,692
WHAT DO YOU GOT... BUTTONS?
485
00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:18,794
YEAH. READ ONE.
486
00:20:18,818 --> 00:20:20,562
"BROCKWELL FOR MAYOR."
487
00:20:20,586 --> 00:20:21,930
READ IT AGAIN.
488
00:20:21,954 --> 00:20:22,931
"BROCKWELL FOR MAYOR."
489
00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:24,099
READ IT AGAIN.
490
00:20:24,123 --> 00:20:25,968
"BROCKWELL FOR MAYRO."
491
00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:28,070
YES.
492
00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:29,905
I'M THE LAUGHINGSTOCK
OF NEW YORK POLITICS.
493
00:20:29,929 --> 00:20:31,540
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
494
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:33,442
I THINK IT'S AN
ENDEARING MISTAKE.
495
00:20:33,466 --> 00:20:35,944
OH, LISTEN. IRA
HAD THE BEST IDEA.
496
00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:37,913
WE'RE GOING TO BURT AND SYLVIA'S
497
00:20:37,937 --> 00:20:39,548
AND IRON OUT THE
PARTY-CONFLICT THING.
498
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:41,015
WHO'S WE?
499
00:20:41,039 --> 00:20:44,486
WELL, THERE'S ME.
THERE'S SANFORD, O.K.?
500
00:20:44,510 --> 00:20:47,144
THERE'S BURT AND
SYLVIA. AND IRA.
501
00:20:48,314 --> 00:20:50,291
AND ZIGGY.
502
00:20:50,315 --> 00:20:52,494
AND YOU AND PAUL!
503
00:20:52,518 --> 00:20:54,162
LISA! DID YOU SAY ME AND PAUL?
504
00:20:54,186 --> 00:20:55,497
YEAH. KIND OF.
505
00:20:55,521 --> 00:20:58,233
NO. I'M SORRY. IT'S
NOT POSSIBLE. NOT NOW.
506
00:20:58,257 --> 00:20:59,568
DON'T YOU WANT TO SEE PAUL?
507
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:03,438
NO, I DON'T... I MEAN, I
DO WANT TO SEE HIM,
508
00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:06,541
BUT I AM NOT READY YET.
509
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:09,778
EVENTUALLY, YES, I WANT TO
SEE HIM. I MISS HIM VERY MUCH,
510
00:21:09,802 --> 00:21:12,180
BUT, NO, I AM NOT
READY RIGHT NOW.
511
00:21:12,204 --> 00:21:14,416
I'M SAYING NO.
ARE YOU LISTENING?
512
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:15,550
AAH!
513
00:21:15,574 --> 00:21:16,518
ALL RIGHT!
514
00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:17,875
THANKS.
515
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:22,157
[SYLVIA] WHERE'S JAMIE?
516
00:21:22,181 --> 00:21:23,225
WHY?
517
00:21:23,249 --> 00:21:24,826
IS THAT AN
UNREASONABLE QUESTION?
518
00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:25,961
YOU'RE MARRIED TO THAT WOMAN.
519
00:21:25,985 --> 00:21:28,029
YOU'RE HERE, SHE'S NOT.
520
00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:29,498
SHE HAD TO, UM...
521
00:21:29,522 --> 00:21:31,266
SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO, UH...
522
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,168
YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED?
523
00:21:33,192 --> 00:21:36,171
FORGET IT. I'M NOT THAT
INTERESTED. BELIEVE ME.
524
00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:37,639
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
525
00:21:37,663 --> 00:21:38,741
WHY? MAKING COFFEE.
526
00:21:38,765 --> 00:21:40,876
IF ZIGGY KLARIK IS COMING,
527
00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:42,745
I WANT TO GIVE HIM SOME COFFEE.
528
00:21:42,769 --> 00:21:45,314
YOU'RE GOING TO GIVE
ZIGGY KLARIK SOME COFFEE?
529
00:21:45,338 --> 00:21:47,416
NO, YOU'RE NOT.
530
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:49,784
ZIGGY KLARIK DOESN'T
DESERVE A CUP OF COFFEE!
531
00:21:49,808 --> 00:21:53,221
IT'S NOT THE GOOD COFFEE.
532
00:21:53,245 --> 00:21:55,390
WHAT'S WITH YOU
AND ZIGGY KLARIK?
533
00:21:55,414 --> 00:21:56,591
YEAH, WHAT HAPPENED?
534
00:21:56,615 --> 00:21:58,326
IT'S NOTHING. FORGET IT.
535
00:21:58,350 --> 00:21:59,961
IT'S A LONG TIME AGO.
536
00:21:59,985 --> 00:22:01,296
TELL THEM ALREADY.
537
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,632
1954, A SALESMAN
COMES INTO MY STORE
538
00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:05,534
WITH HIS NEW PRODUCT.
539
00:22:05,558 --> 00:22:07,869
HE SAYS IT'S GOING
TO SWEEP THE NATION.
540
00:22:07,893 --> 00:22:09,337
IT'S A CIRCULAR THING.
541
00:22:09,361 --> 00:22:11,540
IT'S TUBULAR, A CIRCULAR TUBE.
542
00:22:11,564 --> 00:22:14,442
HE SAYS, "BURT, THIS IS
GOING TO SWEEP THE NATION."
543
00:22:14,466 --> 00:22:17,178
SWEETIE, THE SHORT VERSION.
544
00:22:17,202 --> 00:22:20,716
HE PUTS THIS TUBE AROUND HIS
WAIST, AND HE STARTS TWIRLING.
545
00:22:20,740 --> 00:22:24,152
A HULA-HOOP? THIS GUY
BROUGHT YOU THE HULA-HOOP?
546
00:22:24,176 --> 00:22:27,322
THAT'S RIGHT. WE
MADE A DEAL FOR ME
547
00:22:27,346 --> 00:22:30,091
TO BE THE EXCLUSIVE HULA-HOOP
DISTRIBUTOR IN THE TRISTATE AREA.
548
00:22:30,115 --> 00:22:32,327
THE VERY NEXT DAY,
549
00:22:32,351 --> 00:22:34,996
I GET A CALL FROM THIS GUY.
550
00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,866
ZIGGY KLARIK OUTBID
ME. HE MAKES MILLIONS.
551
00:22:37,890 --> 00:22:40,636
AND ME, EVERY TIME
I SEE A HULA-HOOP,
552
00:22:40,660 --> 00:22:42,537
I GET A PAIN RIGHT HERE.
553
00:22:42,561 --> 00:22:45,640
DON'T EAT YOUR GUTS
OUT. IT WAS 40 YEARS AGO.
554
00:22:45,664 --> 00:22:47,909
MEANWHILE, HE'S
COMING INTO MY KITCHEN,
555
00:22:47,933 --> 00:22:49,243
AND YOU'RE MAKING HIM COFFEE.
556
00:22:49,267 --> 00:22:52,147
BECAUSE HIS SON IS
GOING TO MARRY LISA.
557
00:22:52,171 --> 00:22:54,783
FOR EVERYBODY'S SAKE,
COULD YOU AND ZIGGY
558
00:22:54,807 --> 00:22:56,585
TRY TO WORK OUT A SOLUTION?
559
00:22:56,609 --> 00:22:58,653
WELL, THERE IS A
SIMPLE SOLUTION.
560
00:22:58,677 --> 00:22:59,877
HE CAN DROP DEAD.
561
00:23:01,113 --> 00:23:02,290
[DOORBELL BUZZES]
562
00:23:02,314 --> 00:23:03,391
I THINK IT'S THEM.
563
00:23:03,415 --> 00:23:05,160
THEM WHO?
564
00:23:05,184 --> 00:23:08,296
WHOEVER'S COMING WHO ISN'T US.
565
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,854
I GOT IT. I'LL GO GET IT.
566
00:23:13,158 --> 00:23:14,302
HI.
567
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:16,071
HI.
568
00:23:16,095 --> 00:23:17,739
HI.
569
00:23:17,763 --> 00:23:19,941
I'M GOING TO GIVE
YOU TWO A MINUTE.
570
00:23:19,965 --> 00:23:22,543
I'M SURPRISED YOU CAME.
571
00:23:22,567 --> 00:23:24,346
I DIDN'T WANT TO. LISA ASKED...
572
00:23:24,370 --> 00:23:26,447
I WASN'T LOOKING
FORWARD TO THIS, EITHER.
573
00:23:26,471 --> 00:23:28,883
I KNOW.
574
00:23:28,907 --> 00:23:31,486
ALL RIGHT, AS LONG
AS WE'RE HERE...
575
00:23:31,510 --> 00:23:34,223
MY PARENTS DON'T KNOW
ANYTHING ABOUT THIS, SO...
576
00:23:34,247 --> 00:23:36,791
AND THEY DON'T
NEED TO KNOW, SO...
577
00:23:36,815 --> 00:23:38,660
COULD WE PRETEND FOR THE
AFTERNOON WE'RE STILL US?
578
00:23:38,684 --> 00:23:39,816
O.K.
579
00:23:45,291 --> 00:23:47,035
GET THIS INSURED. I KNOW A GUY.
580
00:23:47,059 --> 00:23:48,604
WHAT'S THE NAME OF THAT GUY?
581
00:23:48,628 --> 00:23:50,372
SHE'S MARRYING KLARIKS.
582
00:23:50,396 --> 00:23:51,306
YOU DON'T THINK THEY'RE INSURED?
583
00:23:51,330 --> 00:23:52,307
HOW DO I KNOW?
584
00:23:52,331 --> 00:23:53,742
HI.
585
00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:55,009
JAMES.
586
00:23:55,033 --> 00:23:56,077
LOOK WHO'S HERE.
587
00:23:56,101 --> 00:23:58,647
HOW IS EVERYBODY?
588
00:23:58,671 --> 00:24:02,083
WE HAVE AN ANNIVERSARY AND
ENGAGEMENT PARTY ON THE SAME DAY.
589
00:24:02,107 --> 00:24:03,518
OTHER THAN THAT,
WE'RE GETTING BY.
590
00:24:03,542 --> 00:24:05,654
[DOORBELL BUZZES]
591
00:24:05,678 --> 00:24:07,155
THAT'S SANFORD AND
HIS DADDY. I'LL GET THAT.
592
00:24:07,179 --> 00:24:09,558
BOY, THE RICH BUZZ LONG.
593
00:24:09,582 --> 00:24:12,226
ENOUGH ALREADY. WE HEAR YOU.
594
00:24:12,250 --> 00:24:15,697
BY THE WAY... YOU
LOOK VERY PRETTY.
595
00:24:15,721 --> 00:24:18,166
THANK YOU. YOU LOOK NICE, TOO.
596
00:24:18,190 --> 00:24:21,236
ALL RIGHT, SHALL WE?
597
00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:24,038
BECAUSE I'VE GOT 15 MINUTES.
598
00:24:24,062 --> 00:24:26,274
YOU EVER SEEN A WATCH LIKE THAT?
599
00:24:26,298 --> 00:24:29,010
NO, I WOULD IMAGINE NOT.
600
00:24:29,034 --> 00:24:31,145
HONEY, WE TOOK A CHECKER CAB.
601
00:24:31,169 --> 00:24:33,314
I SAT IN THE JUMP SEAT.
602
00:24:33,338 --> 00:24:36,251
COOL. ZIGGY KLARIK,
THIS IS MY SISTER JAMIE.
603
00:24:36,275 --> 00:24:37,319
HI. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
604
00:24:37,343 --> 00:24:38,787
JAMIE. JAMIE.
605
00:24:38,811 --> 00:24:40,455
HI, JAMIE. HI, SANFORD.
606
00:24:40,479 --> 00:24:42,257
WE TOOK A CHECKER CAB.
607
00:24:42,281 --> 00:24:44,092
I HEARD.
608
00:24:44,116 --> 00:24:45,627
THIS IS MY BROTHER-IN-LAW PAUL.
609
00:24:45,651 --> 00:24:46,594
HI.
610
00:24:46,618 --> 00:24:47,629
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
611
00:24:47,653 --> 00:24:48,931
PAUL. PAUL.
612
00:24:48,955 --> 00:24:50,432
HI, PAUL.
613
00:24:50,456 --> 00:24:52,176
TOOK A CAB? CHECKER.
614
00:24:54,627 --> 00:24:57,372
AND THIS IS, UH,
PAUL'S COUSIN IRA.
615
00:24:57,396 --> 00:24:59,140
WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
616
00:24:59,164 --> 00:25:00,808
IRA. IRA. IRA.
617
00:25:00,832 --> 00:25:04,245
AND THIS IS PAUL'S MOM SYLVIA.
618
00:25:04,269 --> 00:25:05,714
IMPOSSIBLE.
619
00:25:05,738 --> 00:25:07,315
WHAT?
620
00:25:07,339 --> 00:25:10,552
YOU CAN'T BE HIS
MOM. MAYBE HIS SISTER.
621
00:25:10,576 --> 00:25:12,921
OH, MR. KLARIK.
622
00:25:12,945 --> 00:25:15,357
HIS YOUNGER SISTER.
623
00:25:15,381 --> 00:25:17,692
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT,
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
624
00:25:17,716 --> 00:25:19,794
QUIET. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
625
00:25:19,818 --> 00:25:22,230
AND I BELIEVE YOU KNOW THIS MAN.
626
00:25:22,254 --> 00:25:24,098
HELLO, BURT. ZIGGY.
627
00:25:24,122 --> 00:25:25,433
BEEN A LONG TIME.
628
00:25:25,457 --> 00:25:27,502
UH-HUH.
629
00:25:27,526 --> 00:25:30,138
YOU STILL GOT THAT 12,000
SQUARE FEET ON 8th AVENUE?
630
00:25:30,162 --> 00:25:32,507
THAT'S RIGHT.
631
00:25:32,531 --> 00:25:33,808
SPORTING GOODS?
632
00:25:33,832 --> 00:25:35,343
YEP.
633
00:25:35,367 --> 00:25:38,013
WHAT DID YOU CLEAR LAST YEAR?
634
00:25:38,037 --> 00:25:39,914
WE DID ALL RIGHT.
635
00:25:39,938 --> 00:25:41,883
HA HA HA HA HA.
636
00:25:41,907 --> 00:25:43,318
I'M SURE YOU DID.
637
00:25:43,342 --> 00:25:47,221
UH, WHERE IS MRS. KLARIK TODAY?
638
00:25:47,245 --> 00:25:48,823
SHE COULDN'T BE HERE.
639
00:25:48,847 --> 00:25:50,992
SHE HAD TO GO TO
THE BEAUTY PARLOR...
640
00:25:51,016 --> 00:25:54,329
FOR AN ESTIMATE.
641
00:25:54,353 --> 00:25:56,464
SO, ZIGGY, LET ME
ASK YOU A QUESTION.
642
00:25:56,488 --> 00:25:58,033
OOH, DAD, LET'S NOT.
643
00:25:58,057 --> 00:25:59,268
HOW'S THE HULA-HOOP BUSINESS?
644
00:25:59,292 --> 00:26:00,735
OWWW.
645
00:26:00,759 --> 00:26:02,737
COME ON... 1954. WHAT ABOUT IT?
646
00:26:02,761 --> 00:26:04,272
DON'T PRETEND LIKE
YOU DON'T REMEMBER.
647
00:26:04,296 --> 00:26:05,440
YOU SCREWED ME, KLARIK.
648
00:26:05,464 --> 00:26:07,042
I SCREWED YOU? YEAH.
649
00:26:07,066 --> 00:26:08,509
YOU SHOULD'VE UPPED YOUR PRICE.
650
00:26:08,533 --> 00:26:10,245
I HAD A VERY FAIR PRICE.
651
00:26:10,269 --> 00:26:12,748
SO I WAS MORE FAIR.
652
00:26:12,772 --> 00:26:15,183
IS IT A CRIME TO BE MORE FAIR?
653
00:26:15,207 --> 00:26:17,152
I HAD A DEAL, YOU KNOW IT.
654
00:26:17,176 --> 00:26:18,853
I KNOW NOTHING.
655
00:26:18,877 --> 00:26:21,122
EXCUSE ME, GENTLEMEN. I'M SORRY.
656
00:26:21,146 --> 00:26:24,225
WE'RE HERE TO DISCUSS
THE FUTURE, NOT THE PAST,
657
00:26:24,249 --> 00:26:27,795
SPECIFICALLY, TWO WEEKS
FROM NEXT SUNDAY... THE 12th.
658
00:26:27,819 --> 00:26:31,700
SO, IF... IF WE COULD EITHER
MOVE THE ANNIVERSARY PARTY
659
00:26:31,724 --> 00:26:33,100
OR THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY...
660
00:26:33,124 --> 00:26:35,002
[RASPBERRY] ENGAGEMENT PARTY.
661
00:26:35,026 --> 00:26:36,938
THANK YOU, SWEETHEART.
662
00:26:36,962 --> 00:26:39,441
TRUTHFULLY, UP
UNTIL FIVE WEEKS AGO,
663
00:26:39,465 --> 00:26:42,544
I THOUGHT MY SON WAS GAY.
664
00:26:42,568 --> 00:26:44,779
DAD, DON'T START THIS AGAIN.
665
00:26:44,803 --> 00:26:47,783
WHAT AM I STARTING? WHO AM I?
666
00:26:47,807 --> 00:26:51,419
I'M AN OLD-FASHIONED
GUY. TO ME, YOU'RE GAY.
667
00:26:51,443 --> 00:26:54,489
ALL RIGHT. WHY DON'T
WE CUT TO THE CHASE?
668
00:26:54,513 --> 00:26:56,673
WHO'S GOING TO CHANGE
THEIR PARTY DATE?
669
00:27:01,153 --> 00:27:02,597
HOW MUCH?
670
00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:05,066
HOW MUCH? HOW MUCH? HOW MUCH?
671
00:27:05,090 --> 00:27:07,101
HOW MUCH? YEAH.
GIVE ME A NUMBER.
672
00:27:07,125 --> 00:27:08,870
A NUMBER?
673
00:27:08,894 --> 00:27:11,039
YEAH, A PRICE.
674
00:27:11,063 --> 00:27:13,374
I GIVE YOU MONEY, YOU TAKE
YOUR PARTY TO ANOTHER SUNDAY.
675
00:27:13,398 --> 00:27:14,476
DAD... ZIGGY!
676
00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:15,711
THAT'S ENOUGH.
677
00:27:15,735 --> 00:27:17,011
IT REALLY IS. JAMIE.
678
00:27:17,035 --> 00:27:19,013
SORRY, LISA, THERE
COMES A POINT.
679
00:27:19,037 --> 00:27:20,582
MY PARENTS DON'T NEED
YOUR DIRTY HULA-HOOP MONEY.
680
00:27:20,606 --> 00:27:24,486
YOU CAN'T WALK INTO THEIR
HOME, CRITICIZING AND DISPARAGING.
681
00:27:24,510 --> 00:27:26,688
THEY'RE NOT AN
APPLIANCE OR TOASTER.
682
00:27:26,712 --> 00:27:28,390
THESE ARE PEOPLE.
683
00:27:28,414 --> 00:27:30,258
YOU CAN'T PUT A PRICE
ON 45 YEARS OF MARRIAGE.
684
00:27:30,282 --> 00:27:31,715
YOU CAN'T JUST BUY THAT.
685
00:27:39,358 --> 00:27:41,069
I'LL GIVE YOU $10,000.
686
00:27:41,093 --> 00:27:42,093
[BOTH] SOLD.
687
00:27:59,478 --> 00:28:01,723
MAY I HAVE YOUR
ATTENTION, EVERYBODY?
688
00:28:01,747 --> 00:28:04,225
MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION?
689
00:28:04,249 --> 00:28:06,127
WHY AREN'T YOU STANDING
NEXT TO YOUR WIFE?
690
00:28:06,151 --> 00:28:07,895
BECAUSE I'M NOT.
691
00:28:07,919 --> 00:28:09,497
MAY I HAVE
EVERYBODY'S ATTENTION?
692
00:28:09,521 --> 00:28:11,500
I KNOW IT'S NONE OF MY BUSINESS.
693
00:28:11,524 --> 00:28:13,601
GO STAND NEXT TO YOUR WIFE.
694
00:28:13,625 --> 00:28:15,904
TABBOULEH?
695
00:28:15,928 --> 00:28:16,928
OHH!
696
00:28:18,029 --> 00:28:19,663
MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION?
697
00:28:20,933 --> 00:28:25,001
I'LL GIVE YOU EACH 60
BUCKS FOR YOUR ATTENTION.
698
00:28:28,474 --> 00:28:30,807
SUCKERS! I WOULD'VE GONE TO 80.
699
00:28:32,477 --> 00:28:35,390
FIRST, LET ME SAY I AM SURE
700
00:28:35,414 --> 00:28:37,826
THAT YOU ARE AS
SURPRISED AS I AM
701
00:28:37,850 --> 00:28:42,230
TO BE HERE TO TOAST
MY SON'S ENGAGEMENT.
702
00:28:42,254 --> 00:28:44,254
I THOUGHT FOR THE
SURE THE KID WAS GAY.
703
00:28:48,026 --> 00:28:52,874
MY SON SANFORD MET
A WONDERFUL GIRL...
704
00:28:52,898 --> 00:28:55,110
DUMPED HER...
705
00:28:55,134 --> 00:28:58,468
AND THEN MET
LISA, BUT I KID. I KID.
706
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:05,186
AND I LOOK FORWARD
TO THE NUTS AND BOLTS
707
00:29:05,210 --> 00:29:09,357
OF THE 218-PAGE PRE-NUP
BEING HAMMERED OUT,
708
00:29:09,381 --> 00:29:11,660
AND WE CAN ALL GATHER TOGETHER
709
00:29:11,684 --> 00:29:15,085
AT THE WEDDING
TO SAY, "GO FIGURE."
710
00:29:17,256 --> 00:29:19,868
AND SO NOW WE RAISE OUR GLASSES
711
00:29:19,892 --> 00:29:22,503
TO MY SON SANFORD...
712
00:29:22,527 --> 00:29:23,705
HEAR, HEAR. HEAR, HEAR.
713
00:29:23,729 --> 00:29:26,240
AND TO HIS FIANCéE LISA.
714
00:29:26,264 --> 00:29:27,341
ENJOY YOURSELVES!
715
00:29:27,365 --> 00:29:29,833
AND FOR GOD'S SAKE,
DON'T BREAK ANYTHING!
716
00:29:31,904 --> 00:29:33,581
AHH!
717
00:29:33,605 --> 00:29:36,885
YOU GOT TO COME TO
MY CLUB NEXT WEEKEND,
718
00:29:36,909 --> 00:29:41,556
AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU
ALL ABOUT DOOKIE BALL.
719
00:29:41,580 --> 00:29:43,325
"DOOKIE BALL"?
720
00:29:43,349 --> 00:29:45,593
YEAH. IT'S GOING TO
SWEEP THE NATION.
721
00:29:45,617 --> 00:29:48,363
HONEY, CONGRATULATIONS.
722
00:29:48,387 --> 00:29:50,198
OH, THANK YOU.
723
00:29:50,222 --> 00:29:52,266
I'M NOT FEELING
GREAT. I'M GOING TO GO.
724
00:29:52,290 --> 00:29:53,367
DID YOU TALK TO HIM?
725
00:29:53,391 --> 00:29:55,436
THIS ISN'T THE TIME OR PLACE.
726
00:29:55,460 --> 00:29:57,906
O.K., BUT AT LEAST COME
SAY GOODBYE TO SANFORD.
727
00:29:57,930 --> 00:29:59,774
THIS IS THE HAPPIEST
DAY OF MY LIFE.
728
00:29:59,798 --> 00:30:01,743
YOU GOT A GREAT GIRL THERE.
729
00:30:01,767 --> 00:30:02,810
DON'T I THOUGH?
730
00:30:02,834 --> 00:30:04,979
HEY, SANFORD, JAMIE
WANTS TO SAY GOODBYE.
731
00:30:05,003 --> 00:30:06,548
I WISH YOU EVERY HAPPINESS.
732
00:30:06,572 --> 00:30:07,516
THANKS.
733
00:30:07,540 --> 00:30:08,649
AMEN.
734
00:30:08,673 --> 00:30:10,051
THERE YOU ARE.
735
00:30:10,075 --> 00:30:12,620
I'M SO GLAD YOU MADE IT.
736
00:30:12,644 --> 00:30:14,356
WE WOULDN'T HAVE
MISSED IT FOR THE WORLD.
737
00:30:14,380 --> 00:30:16,091
I WANT TO TELL YOU...
738
00:30:16,115 --> 00:30:18,393
IN THE END, MONEY MEANS NOTHING.
739
00:30:18,417 --> 00:30:20,362
OH, I WOULDN'T SAY NOTHING.
740
00:30:20,386 --> 00:30:22,730
IT MEANS SOMETHING, BUT
VERY LITTLE COMPARED TO LOVE.
741
00:30:22,754 --> 00:30:24,365
DAD, THAT'S TRUE.
742
00:30:24,389 --> 00:30:27,168
BUT TRUST EVEN MORE
THAN LOVE, DON'T YOU THINK?
743
00:30:27,192 --> 00:30:29,303
WHAT'S LOVE IF THERE'S NO TRUST?
744
00:30:29,327 --> 00:30:32,140
HMM, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.
TRUST ABOVE EVERYTHING.
745
00:30:32,164 --> 00:30:36,310
YOU HEAR THAT, HONEY? APPARENTLY
TRUST ABOVE EVERYTHING ELSE.
746
00:30:36,334 --> 00:30:38,946
I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.
747
00:30:38,970 --> 00:30:41,082
WHERE YOU GOING? I
DIDN'T SAY... HE SAID IT.
748
00:30:41,106 --> 00:30:42,783
DID I SAY SOMETHING WRONG?
749
00:30:42,807 --> 00:30:44,887
NO, NO. SHE'S JUST...
750
00:30:50,249 --> 00:30:51,592
HEY, HEY.
751
00:30:51,616 --> 00:30:53,295
YOU ARE SUCH A JACKASS.
752
00:30:53,319 --> 00:30:54,462
I'M A JACKASS?
753
00:30:54,486 --> 00:30:56,131
YES.
754
00:30:56,155 --> 00:30:57,465
FINE, SO LEAVE ME
FOR ANOTHER GUY.
755
00:30:57,489 --> 00:30:59,700
I'M NOT LEAVING YOU. GOD!
756
00:30:59,724 --> 00:31:01,369
YOU'RE HITTING ME. INTERESTING.
757
00:31:01,393 --> 00:31:03,772
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
758
00:31:03,796 --> 00:31:05,373
I DON'T KNOW.
759
00:31:05,397 --> 00:31:07,041
LET'S GO HOME AND TALK.
760
00:31:07,065 --> 00:31:09,210
NO, I CAN'T. I DON'T
LIKE OUR HOME.
761
00:31:09,234 --> 00:31:11,445
DO YOU WANT TO GO
SOMEWHERE ELSE?
762
00:31:11,469 --> 00:31:12,346
NOT PARTICULARLY. O.K., FINE.
763
00:31:12,370 --> 00:31:13,648
WHERE YOU GOING?
764
00:31:13,672 --> 00:31:15,150
IF YOU DON'T WANT TO
TALK... WHO SAID THAT?
765
00:31:15,174 --> 00:31:16,751
YOU DID. I DID NOT.
766
00:31:16,775 --> 00:31:18,252
I JUST SAID, "DO
YOU WANT TO TALK?"
767
00:31:18,276 --> 00:31:21,789
I DIDN'T LIKE THE
WAY YOU SAID IT.
768
00:31:21,813 --> 00:31:25,126
I'M SO TIRED OF
NOT TALKING TO YOU.
769
00:31:25,150 --> 00:31:27,317
THEN TALK TO ME.
770
00:31:32,223 --> 00:31:33,368
HOW YOU DOING?
771
00:31:33,392 --> 00:31:34,424
I'M FINE.
772
00:31:37,362 --> 00:31:39,174
I DON'T TRUST YOU ANYMORE.
773
00:31:39,198 --> 00:31:41,642
IF YOU'RE NEVER GOING
TO TRUST ME AGAIN...
774
00:31:41,666 --> 00:31:43,611
DID I SAY THAT? NO, BUT...
775
00:31:43,635 --> 00:31:44,779
STOP PUTTING WORDS IN MY MOUTH.
776
00:31:44,803 --> 00:31:45,880
I'M SORRY. THANK YOU.
777
00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:48,416
GEEZ. ALL RIGHT...
778
00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:50,718
GO... GO AHEAD. GO AHEAD.
779
00:31:50,742 --> 00:31:55,023
YOU DON'T TRUST ME
ANYMORE... BECAUSE...
780
00:31:55,047 --> 00:31:56,512
BECAUSE?
781
00:31:57,782 --> 00:32:01,630
BECAUSE I... I KISSED
ANOTHER MAN?
782
00:32:01,654 --> 00:32:06,167
YEAH. THAT'S CERTAINLY
NOT A PLUS, YOU KNOW.
783
00:32:06,191 --> 00:32:09,031
THAT'S NOT SOMETHING THAT
ENDEARS YOU MORE TO ME.
784
00:32:10,929 --> 00:32:13,408
O.K., LISTEN TO ME.
785
00:32:13,432 --> 00:32:16,478
I AM SO SORRY.
786
00:32:16,502 --> 00:32:18,480
I COULD NOT BE MORE SORRY.
787
00:32:18,504 --> 00:32:20,749
IF I HAVE TO APOLOGIZE
788
00:32:20,773 --> 00:32:22,216
EVERY DAY FOR
THE REST OF MY LIFE,
789
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:24,741
THEN I WILL, O.K.?
I AM THAT SORRY.
790
00:32:44,997 --> 00:32:48,376
I THOUGHT YOU DID A VERY
NICE JOB AT THE PARTY.
791
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:49,533
THANKS.
792
00:32:52,370 --> 00:32:55,717
HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN
ALL OF A SUDDEN?
793
00:32:55,741 --> 00:32:58,207
IT'S NOT ALL OF A SUDDEN.
794
00:32:59,912 --> 00:33:03,190
WHY DO YOU THINK I KEPT
SAYING WE NEED TIME TOGETHER?
795
00:33:03,214 --> 00:33:06,427
WHY I KEPT PUSHING FOR
US TO GET AWAY TOGETHER?
796
00:33:06,451 --> 00:33:07,595
SOMETHING WAS GOING ON.
797
00:33:07,619 --> 00:33:08,963
WITH BERKUS?
798
00:33:08,987 --> 00:33:11,099
WITH US.
799
00:33:11,123 --> 00:33:14,201
THIS GUY IS NOT THE PROBLEM.
800
00:33:14,225 --> 00:33:16,971
YOU KISSED HIM.
801
00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:18,873
YOU KNOW?
802
00:33:18,897 --> 00:33:20,174
YOU KISSED HIM.
803
00:33:20,198 --> 00:33:23,211
DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT'S
LIKE FOR ME TO IMAGINE?
804
00:33:23,235 --> 00:33:26,402
THAT ANOTHER GUY'S
LIPS WERE ON YOUR LIPS.
805
00:33:28,373 --> 00:33:29,684
WHAT KIND OF KISS WAS THAT?
806
00:33:29,708 --> 00:33:31,252
YOU NEVER EVEN TOLD ME.
807
00:33:31,276 --> 00:33:35,156
LIKE WHERE... WERE HIS
HANDS? YOUR HANDS?
808
00:33:35,180 --> 00:33:37,659
STOP IT. STOP IT.
WHAT WERE YOU DOING?
809
00:33:37,683 --> 00:33:39,728
REALLY, STOP IT. PULLING
HIM CLOSE TO YOU.
810
00:33:39,752 --> 00:33:42,463
YOU REALLY WANT TO
KNOW? YOU'RE DOING WHAT?
811
00:33:42,487 --> 00:33:45,499
HE LEANED IN... I...
SHUT UP! SHUT UP NOW.
812
00:33:45,523 --> 00:33:47,134
STOP ASKING ME ABOUT IT.
813
00:33:47,158 --> 00:33:50,204
HOW DO I KNOW THAT THIS
NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE?
814
00:33:50,228 --> 00:33:51,439
BECAUSE I'M TELLING YOU.
815
00:33:51,463 --> 00:33:53,441
SO WHAT'S THAT?
816
00:33:53,465 --> 00:33:55,109
HONESTY'S YOUR STRONGEST
PERSONALITY TRAIT RIGHT NOW?
817
00:33:55,133 --> 00:33:57,111
ACTUALLY, YES.
818
00:33:57,135 --> 00:33:58,312
WHAT HAPPENED IN ALBANY?
819
00:33:58,336 --> 00:33:59,647
NOTHING HAPPENED IN ALBANY.
820
00:33:59,671 --> 00:34:01,082
O.K., SAYS YOU.
821
00:34:01,106 --> 00:34:03,284
I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO ALBANY.
822
00:34:03,308 --> 00:34:05,353
I TURNED AROUND AND CAME BACK
823
00:34:05,377 --> 00:34:08,423
BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU.
824
00:34:08,447 --> 00:34:10,458
WELL, I DON'T KNOW,
YOU KNOW. I JUST...
825
00:34:10,482 --> 00:34:11,482
I JUST...
826
00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,131
I JUST HATE THIS.
827
00:34:17,155 --> 00:34:18,833
WHAT?
828
00:34:18,857 --> 00:34:22,403
I'M GOING TO BE 40,
STANDING IN A PARK,
829
00:34:22,427 --> 00:34:24,538
ASKING YOU QUESTIONS LIKE,
"WHERE WERE THE GUY'S HANDS?"
830
00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:27,508
I MEAN, IT'S JUST SO...
831
00:34:27,532 --> 00:34:31,278
IT'S JUST SO PEDESTRIAN.
832
00:34:31,302 --> 00:34:34,048
WHO SAID WE'RE NOT PEDESTRIAN?
833
00:34:34,072 --> 00:34:35,549
I ALWAYS ASSUMED THAT YOU AND I
834
00:34:35,573 --> 00:34:38,486
WOULD BE IMMUNE TO THIS CRAP.
835
00:34:38,510 --> 00:34:39,943
WELL, WE'RE NOT.
836
00:34:42,180 --> 00:34:44,658
WHEN I STARTED WORKING
SO HARD THIS YEAR
837
00:34:44,682 --> 00:34:46,227
AND PUT IN LONGER HOURS...
838
00:34:46,251 --> 00:34:47,595
I ALWAYS SUPPORTED YOU.
839
00:34:47,619 --> 00:34:49,030
YES, YOU DID.
840
00:34:49,054 --> 00:34:51,132
I SAID GO DO WHAT
YOU HAVE TO DO.
841
00:34:51,156 --> 00:34:52,600
YES, YOU DID.
842
00:34:52,624 --> 00:34:54,201
WHY? I BELIEVED IN, TRUSTED...
843
00:34:54,225 --> 00:34:55,570
NO, BECAUSE YOU LIKED IT.
844
00:34:55,594 --> 00:34:57,805
I LIKED YOU WORKING
WITH THIS GUY?
845
00:34:57,829 --> 00:34:59,874
NO. ME NOT BEING AROUND.
846
00:34:59,898 --> 00:35:02,576
IT WAS O.K. FOR YOU
TO NOT BE AROUND.
847
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,145
EVERYTHING WAS EVEN.
NOTHING WOULD BE YOUR FAULT.
848
00:35:04,169 --> 00:35:05,713
WHAT WOULDN'T BE MY FAULT?
849
00:35:05,737 --> 00:35:07,481
WHATEVER IS WRONG WITH US...
850
00:35:07,505 --> 00:35:09,083
HOWEVER MUCH WE DRIFT APART,
851
00:35:09,107 --> 00:35:10,384
HOWEVER MUCH WE DON'T TALK.
852
00:35:10,408 --> 00:35:11,953
WHEN DON'T WE TALK?
853
00:35:11,977 --> 00:35:13,855
COME ON.
854
00:35:13,879 --> 00:35:16,323
IN THE LAST THREE
MONTHS HOW MANY TIMES
855
00:35:16,347 --> 00:35:17,625
HAVE WE EATEN DINNER TOGETHER?
856
00:35:17,649 --> 00:35:19,593
HOW MANY TIMES
857
00:35:19,617 --> 00:35:21,996
HAVE WE DONE SOMETHING
FUN ON A WEEKEND?
858
00:35:22,020 --> 00:35:24,565
WHEN DID WE LAST MAKE
LOVE BECAUSE WE WANTED TO,
859
00:35:24,589 --> 00:35:27,568
NOT BECAUSE IT WAS
GOOD CLINICAL TIMING?
860
00:35:27,592 --> 00:35:29,070
TELL ME. WHEN?
861
00:35:29,094 --> 00:35:31,306
I DON'T KNOW.
862
00:35:31,330 --> 00:35:34,041
IS THAT WHAT YOU
WANT OUT OF MARRIAGE?
863
00:35:34,065 --> 00:35:37,011
DON'T YOU THINK
WE DESERVE BETTER?
864
00:35:37,035 --> 00:35:38,546
FIRST, I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY
865
00:35:38,570 --> 00:35:41,982
WHO TALKS MORE THAN
WE DO. I WOULDN'T WANT TO.
866
00:35:42,006 --> 00:35:43,418
WE'RE TALKING, BUT
NOBODY IS SAYING
867
00:35:43,442 --> 00:35:45,920
THE NASTY, OLD, UGLY TRUTH.
868
00:35:45,944 --> 00:35:47,354
WHICH IS WHAT?
869
00:35:47,378 --> 00:35:48,678
THIS ISN'T WORKING.
870
00:35:50,482 --> 00:35:53,227
I REACH OUT FOR YOU,
YOU'RE NOT THERE.
871
00:35:53,251 --> 00:35:54,795
I'M CERTAINLY NOT THERE FOR YOU.
872
00:35:54,819 --> 00:35:56,331
YOU'VE BEEN WORKING...
873
00:35:56,355 --> 00:35:58,532
I'VE BEEN WORKING.
YOU'VE BEEN WORKING.
874
00:35:58,556 --> 00:36:00,134
WE'RE KILLING OURSELVES,
875
00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:01,735
SAVING AND PLANNING,
AND FOR WHAT?
876
00:36:01,759 --> 00:36:05,039
FOR THIS BABY THAT'S NOT COMING.
877
00:36:05,063 --> 00:36:07,008
WE'VE BEEN TRYING A
YEAR. IT'S NOT HAPPENING.
878
00:36:07,032 --> 00:36:09,610
IS THAT MY FAULT?
879
00:36:09,634 --> 00:36:12,112
NO, IT'S NOT. GOD, WHAT
IS WRONG WITH YOU?
880
00:36:12,136 --> 00:36:13,047
IT'S LIKE YOU'RE A CHILD.
881
00:36:13,071 --> 00:36:14,281
THANK YOU.
882
00:36:14,305 --> 00:36:17,184
IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK I SAID?
883
00:36:17,208 --> 00:36:19,253
I'M NOT SAYING THAT!
884
00:36:19,277 --> 00:36:21,855
FINE. ALL RIGHT.
885
00:36:21,879 --> 00:36:24,958
IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW,
IT'S NOT SOMETHING
886
00:36:24,982 --> 00:36:27,027
THAT MAKES ME FEEL
PARTICULARLY SWELL, YOU KNOW.
887
00:36:27,051 --> 00:36:29,597
I'M NOT EXACTLY DOING MY
JOB IN THAT DEPARTMENT.
888
00:36:29,621 --> 00:36:31,966
YOU WERE TESTED. YOU'RE FINE.
889
00:36:31,990 --> 00:36:33,234
SO WERE YOU.
890
00:36:33,258 --> 00:36:34,702
YEAH, BUT COME ON.
891
00:36:34,726 --> 00:36:36,570
WHAT?
892
00:36:36,594 --> 00:36:38,372
LET'S STOP KIDDING OURSELVES.
893
00:36:38,396 --> 00:36:39,840
IF THERE'S SOMETHING
WRONG, IT'S ME.
894
00:36:39,864 --> 00:36:42,109
NO. NO.
895
00:36:42,133 --> 00:36:44,879
LOOK, THE TRUTH IS, YOU
CAN ALWAYS HAVE KIDS,
896
00:36:44,903 --> 00:36:46,047
WHEREAS I...
897
00:36:46,071 --> 00:36:47,549
WHAT'S THAT MEAN? IT
MEANS WHAT IT MEANS.
898
00:36:47,573 --> 00:36:49,383
YOU CAN HAVE
KIDS, SO IF I CAN'T,
899
00:36:49,407 --> 00:36:50,718
THEN, FINE.
900
00:36:50,742 --> 00:36:52,653
ALL RIGHT, FINE. YOU'LL MOVE ON.
901
00:36:52,677 --> 00:36:55,122
MOVE ON? YES, YOU'LL LEAVE...
902
00:36:55,146 --> 00:36:56,190
LEAVE? YOU COULD.
903
00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:57,692
THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK?
904
00:36:57,716 --> 00:36:59,227
IF I WAS IN YOUR PLACE,
905
00:36:59,251 --> 00:37:02,029
AND IT'S MY ONE CHANCE
TO FATHER A CHILD...
906
00:37:02,053 --> 00:37:03,752
WELL, THEN SHAME ON YOU!
907
00:37:05,157 --> 00:37:07,869
SHAME ON YOU IF THAT'S
WHAT YOU THINK OF ME,
908
00:37:07,893 --> 00:37:10,939
THAT I WOULD LEAVE YOU?
909
00:37:10,963 --> 00:37:12,507
I'M NOT SAYING YOU WILL.
910
00:37:12,531 --> 00:37:14,542
NO, BUT IF I DO, IN CASE I DO,
911
00:37:14,566 --> 00:37:15,543
YOU GO FIND ANOTHER GUY,
912
00:37:15,567 --> 00:37:17,266
AND WHY DON'T
YOU LEAVE ME FIRST?
913
00:37:19,538 --> 00:37:20,804
MAYBE.
914
00:37:26,477 --> 00:37:28,744
HOW CAN YOU DOUBT
MY LOVE FOR YOU?
915
00:37:31,116 --> 00:37:32,276
BECAUSE I DO.
916
00:37:39,658 --> 00:37:42,303
WELL, THEN, YOU KNOW WHAT?
917
00:37:42,327 --> 00:37:44,271
YOU WILL NEVER GET IT.
918
00:37:44,295 --> 00:37:45,472
WHAT?
919
00:37:45,496 --> 00:37:46,662
YOU JUST...
920
00:37:49,134 --> 00:37:53,014
IF YOU CAN'T HAVE
KIDS, I CAN'T HAVE KIDS.
921
00:37:53,038 --> 00:37:55,871
WHATEVER HAPPENS
TO YOU HAPPENS TO ME.
922
00:37:57,108 --> 00:37:58,152
WHATEVER HAPPENS HAPPENS TO US.
923
00:37:58,176 --> 00:38:01,855
DO YOU NOT GET THAT BY NOW?
924
00:38:01,879 --> 00:38:04,280
I THOUGHT I DID.
925
00:38:07,652 --> 00:38:09,964
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO
BE A BETTER HUSBAND.
926
00:38:09,988 --> 00:38:11,832
I REALLY DON'T,
927
00:38:11,856 --> 00:38:15,169
AND I THINK I'M
PRETTY DAMN GOOD.
928
00:38:15,193 --> 00:38:16,237
YOU ARE.
929
00:38:16,261 --> 00:38:17,838
THANK YOU.
930
00:38:17,862 --> 00:38:20,174
AND... SO AM I.
931
00:38:20,198 --> 00:38:21,642
YES, YOU ARE. YES, OF COURSE.
932
00:38:21,666 --> 00:38:24,200
I THINK WE'RE BOTH
PRETTY DAMN GOOD.
933
00:38:28,506 --> 00:38:30,740
AND YET, NOBODY HERE IS HAPPY.
934
00:38:40,585 --> 00:38:41,851
I TOLD YOU.
935
00:38:45,490 --> 00:38:46,500
WHAT?
936
00:38:46,524 --> 00:38:49,570
I TOLD YOU WHEN I MET YOU.
937
00:38:49,594 --> 00:38:52,606
TWO PEOPLE...
TOGETHER FOREVER...
938
00:38:52,630 --> 00:38:54,708
IT'S NOT REALISTIC.
I THINK IT'S...
939
00:38:54,732 --> 00:38:56,532
I THINK IT'S TOO HARD.
940
00:38:58,169 --> 00:38:59,546
YES, IT IS.
941
00:38:59,570 --> 00:39:01,281
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
942
00:39:01,305 --> 00:39:03,351
YES, IT IS.
943
00:39:03,375 --> 00:39:05,653
SO MAYBE THIS IS IT.
944
00:39:05,677 --> 00:39:08,522
WE GAVE IT OUR BEST SHOT.
945
00:39:08,546 --> 00:39:12,559
THIS IS AS FAR AS WE GOT.
946
00:39:12,583 --> 00:39:14,684
IT'S A LOT FARTHER THAN
MOST PEOPLE GET, YOU KNOW.
947
00:39:17,555 --> 00:39:18,595
MAYBE.
948
00:39:23,495 --> 00:39:24,660
REALLY?
949
00:39:27,032 --> 00:39:30,472
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO
DO BETTER THAN THIS.
950
00:39:35,206 --> 00:39:36,739
SO...
951
00:39:40,111 --> 00:39:41,711
SEW BUTTONS.
952
00:39:50,021 --> 00:39:54,702
UM, WOULD YOU DO
ME A FAVOR, AND...
953
00:39:54,726 --> 00:39:56,737
WOULD YOU TELL YOUR
SISTER THAT I'M SORRY?
954
00:39:56,761 --> 00:39:58,762
I... I DON'T... O.K.
955
00:43:52,296 --> 00:43:53,863
AM I DREAMING?
956
00:44:03,007 --> 00:44:06,520
I'M SORRY. I'M REALLY
JUST SO SORRY.
957
00:44:06,544 --> 00:44:07,922
YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE SORRY.
958
00:44:07,946 --> 00:44:09,311
I'M THE ONE WHO HAS TO BE SORRY.
959
00:44:11,415 --> 00:44:13,594
I JUST WANT YOU.
960
00:44:13,618 --> 00:44:15,118
I LOVE YOU.
961
00:44:18,089 --> 00:44:19,822
I JUST LOVE YOU.
962
00:44:24,762 --> 00:44:26,840
I DON'T CARE HOW HARD IT IS.
963
00:44:26,864 --> 00:44:29,343
I DON'T, EITHER.
964
00:44:29,367 --> 00:44:30,378
I JUST REALLY... I LOVE YOU...
965
00:44:30,402 --> 00:44:32,668
IS THE THING.
966
00:45:16,380 --> 00:45:17,980
[TIMER TICKING]
967
00:45:24,254 --> 00:45:25,320
[DING]
64797
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.