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Previously on Californication...
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00:00:03,211 --> 00:00:06,130
Most recently, I gave man-birth
to a weighty tome
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00:00:06,214 --> 00:00:08,590
called God Hates Us All,
which was turned into a movie called...
4
00:00:08,633 --> 00:00:11,927
A Crazy Little Thing Called Love.
5
00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:13,846
You started when you cheated on me.
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Cheating isn't just about fucking someone.
7
00:00:15,765 --> 00:00:17,474
Are you trying to make me throw up now?
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00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:19,852
Happy endings may get a bad rep,
but they do happen.
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00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:22,896
It is possible maybe one day you
and Mom could get back together?
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00:00:22,939 --> 00:00:24,064
Anything's possible.
11
00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:26,442
Get on with your life
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00:00:26,484 --> 00:00:29,737
and forget about the woman
you didn't want to marry.
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Moody.
14
00:01:43,186 --> 00:01:45,562
Oh, hey, sis. What's up?
15
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The white zone
is for the immediate loading
16
00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:57,825
and unloading of passengers only.
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00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,577
Please do not leave
your vehicle unattended.
18
00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:10,546
- Pop.
- Hey, kiddo. On time, as always.
19
00:02:10,588 --> 00:02:14,675
Sorry, I had a late shoot last night.
How was the flight?
20
00:02:14,717 --> 00:02:17,553
Bumpy as fuck, but the cocktails helped.
21
00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:19,972
So did business class,
thank you very much.
22
00:02:20,014 --> 00:02:22,182
- A guy could get used to that kind of thing.
- You're welcome.
23
00:02:22,225 --> 00:02:25,978
Not only is it a better meal,
it's a better class of stewardess.
24
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:29,940
You should have seen the one I had.
Sweet Jesus, guide me.
25
00:02:30,024 --> 00:02:32,484
I think they call them
flight attendants now, Pop.
26
00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:34,820
She had tits out to here, legs for days,
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00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,905
an ass like a ten-year-old boy.
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00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:41,201
Goddamn. That's pretty.
What kind of flower is that?
29
00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:44,663
That's a purple... purple flower.
30
00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:46,582
Nobody likes a smartass.
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00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:49,626
I don't have a fucking clue,
which never seems to stop you
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00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:52,379
from asking me every other goddamn time.
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00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:53,839
Watch your mouth.
34
00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:57,009
I don't know if you've noticed,
but it's kind of crazy for me lately.
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00:02:57,051 --> 00:02:58,969
I don't really have time
to stop and smell the flowers
36
00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:01,388
and then look up their proper names online.
37
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,266
You find any time to get married?
38
00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:07,561
- No. Still living in sin.
- Ah, your poor mother.
39
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:09,688
- She's dead, Pop.
- I know.
40
00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:13,692
She's probably doing somersaults
in her grave right now.
41
00:03:13,735 --> 00:03:15,569
Aw, shit.
42
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:17,321
What do you think?
43
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:20,157
It's pretty fancy, kid.
44
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,742
- Yeah.
- Sure you can afford it?
45
00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:23,535
Don't sweat it. I'll be fine.
46
00:03:23,578 --> 00:03:25,704
If you say so.
47
00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:29,708
OK, who do I have to fuck
to get a cocktail around here?
48
00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:36,340
So, what are your thoughts on rehab?
49
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:40,219
Rehab is for quitters.
50
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,973
Come on. Come on!
51
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:48,060
- How come I don't know your name?
- You haven't asked.
52
00:03:48,102 --> 00:03:53,106
- Well, let's not stand on ceremony.
- Trixie.
53
00:03:53,149 --> 00:03:54,733
Trixie?
54
00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:57,861
That is a terrific name...
If you're a hooker.
55
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:03,742
What makes you think I'm not a hooker?
56
00:04:03,826 --> 00:04:07,663
Well, for one, you're far too beautiful.
57
00:04:07,705 --> 00:04:12,584
And secondly, even if you
were a street-walkin' cheetah,
58
00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,628
I would get you to give it to me gratis.
59
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,756
- Oh, you think so, huh?
- I have never paid for sex in my life.
60
00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:19,716
I doubt that.
61
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,010
Oh, speak of the she-devil.
62
00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:23,720
- Hey.
- Hey.
63
00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:26,556
- Karen, Trixie. Trixie, Karen.
- Nice to meet you.
64
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:30,394
We're trying to determine
if she is a professional sex worker.
65
00:04:31,062 --> 00:04:34,398
Oh. How nice for you both.
66
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:37,943
- I need you to come with me.
- And I need to use the restroom.
67
00:04:37,986 --> 00:04:41,196
You do that.
Chicks with small bladders are hot.
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00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:42,948
- Thanks.
- To be continued.
69
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:46,660
- So, your sister called.
- Well, I figured she would.
70
00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:49,246
Hank, I'm so sorry.
71
00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:54,334
Well, I don't know
what to do with that exactly,
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00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:57,921
but thank you, I guess.
73
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:02,718
- Do you want to get out of here?
- Yeah. Where?
74
00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:05,178
- Home.
- Oh, home.
75
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:07,222
That sounds nice.
76
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:09,599
But where is that exactly... home?
77
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:12,519
Your home? My home? Our home?
78
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,896
Hank, I got you a ticket.
79
00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:17,733
I hope that's fully refundable
because I ain't going.
80
00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:20,485
You're not going to your dad's funeral?
81
00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:23,822
- He was a fucking asshole.
- Come on, Hank, you don't mean that.
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00:05:23,865 --> 00:05:26,616
Don't tell me what I mean.
Don't try to mother me.
83
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,660
Half the time you act
like you don't give a shit.
84
00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:31,246
- Now you care?
- I've always cared.
85
00:05:32,081 --> 00:05:34,082
It's easy to say.
86
00:05:34,792 --> 00:05:36,668
Hi.
87
00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:39,338
Sir Trix-a-lot.
88
00:05:39,380 --> 00:05:40,464
Want to get out of here?
89
00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:42,424
Sure. Meter's running.
90
00:05:42,467 --> 00:05:44,259
The meter's running.
91
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:48,180
- What should we name him?
- I know... let's call him Love.
92
00:05:49,223 --> 00:05:51,266
A crazy little thing called love.
93
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:58,690
And... Cut! That was fucking cash!
94
00:05:58,733 --> 00:06:01,318
- Carr, what the fuck?
- What the fuck, what?
95
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,278
I'm not sure, but I think
my rectum just prolapsed.
96
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:06,698
- What's with the fucking dialogue?
- They rewrote it themselves in the trailer.
97
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:09,326
- He thought we could end on the kiss.
- What do you think?
98
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:13,413
I think the man is money and we should
listen to whatever the fuck he says.
99
00:06:13,456 --> 00:06:15,957
If he wants to tuck his magical
movie-star cock between his legs
100
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,418
and do the pee-pee dance,
I'm putting that on film, too.
101
00:06:18,461 --> 00:06:19,878
And I would wait on line to see it.
102
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:22,756
Meanwhile, you're turning
my movie into a piece of shit.
103
00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:25,175
Your book, my movie.
104
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:27,344
Don't be a backseat director, Moody.
105
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,971
All due respect, sir,
but your boy is exhausting.
106
00:06:30,014 --> 00:06:33,141
Tell me about it.
Drove us all batshit growing up.
107
00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:36,812
That was fantastic, guys.
108
00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:39,564
I hate that runty little motherfucker.
109
00:06:39,607 --> 00:06:43,068
I don't know, seemed like a nice enough
guy to me. Very charismatic.
110
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:47,155
I liked him in that Vietnam movie.
He played a good cripple.
111
00:06:47,198 --> 00:06:50,492
Pop, when there's no more room in hell
and the devil himself walks the earth,
112
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:54,496
don't you think he'll be playing cripples and
charming his way into the pants of many?
113
00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:56,289
I'm proud of you, kid.
114
00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:57,916
- Why?
- Why?
115
00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,626
This is the American dream, right here.
116
00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:02,045
Your name is going to be up
on the silver screen.
117
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:04,339
- You'll be immortal.
- I've written a couple books, too.
118
00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,383
They'll be around long after I'm gone.
119
00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:08,969
- That's not the same.
- You haven't read them.
120
00:07:09,011 --> 00:07:12,013
Your mother filled me in.
It's too many words for me.
121
00:07:12,056 --> 00:07:14,015
You know who's a good writer?
James Patterson.
122
00:07:14,058 --> 00:07:15,976
I read one of his books on the plane.
123
00:07:16,018 --> 00:07:20,021
- Hank Moody.
- Amber, hi. How are you?
124
00:07:20,064 --> 00:07:23,358
- Good.
- This is Amber. She's in the film.
125
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:27,112
- Amber, this is my old man, Al.
- So nice to meet you.
126
00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,864
The moodiest of the Moodys.
127
00:07:28,906 --> 00:07:31,491
I see the apple doesn't fall
far from the tree.
128
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:33,994
Come see me? I've got some thoughts.
129
00:07:34,036 --> 00:07:36,413
OK, couple minutes? Cool.
130
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:38,248
Oh, I've got some thoughts, too...
131
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:42,127
Some thoughts that are making it
just a little bit crowded in my pants.
132
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:43,837
What's the story, morning glory?
133
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:47,382
Whoa. Settle down.
I'm a happily non-married man.
134
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,640
Aahh!
135
00:07:55,683 --> 00:07:57,642
I always wanted to do that.
136
00:07:57,685 --> 00:07:59,519
Fuck, that's good. Funny.
137
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,355
Good for you.
138
00:08:02,398 --> 00:08:04,900
Who says America
isn't the land of opportunity?
139
00:08:04,942 --> 00:08:07,903
Yep, another $10 dream come true.
140
00:08:07,945 --> 00:08:10,906
- It's gonna cost you a little more than that.
- Stop that!
141
00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:12,991
Maybe I should do one off your rib cage.
142
00:08:13,034 --> 00:08:15,202
As you wish.
143
00:08:15,244 --> 00:08:18,330
So, what are you running from?
144
00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:20,415
Oh, please. No one holes up
in a hotel room
145
00:08:20,458 --> 00:08:23,877
with a hooker and a pile of blow
without being on the run from something.
146
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:25,754
Stop joking about the hooker stuff.
147
00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:28,882
You're making me paranoid.
148
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:30,884
Maybe it's the blow.
149
00:08:35,097 --> 00:08:37,140
- I'm not joking.
- Yes, you are.
150
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,351
- No.
- Oh, come on.
151
00:08:39,393 --> 00:08:41,228
Really? Let me get this straight...
152
00:08:41,270 --> 00:08:46,483
Your name is Trixie
and you are in fact a whore?
153
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:47,776
My name is Beatrice.
154
00:08:47,818 --> 00:08:50,237
My parents thought it would be
cute to call me Trixie.
155
00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:53,740
Oh. Wow. They still think it's cute?
156
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:54,824
They're dead.
157
00:08:56,452 --> 00:08:59,329
Well, here's a thought.
158
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:01,957
Why don't...
159
00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:04,918
I do you this time,
and then we call it even?
160
00:09:05,002 --> 00:09:07,087
Well, we can do whatever you want,
161
00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:10,131
but you're still gonna get
a bill for services rendered.
162
00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:12,884
What about the blow?
I paid for the blow and you partook.
163
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:15,762
- Doesn't that get me a discount?
- Sorry, sweetie.
164
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:16,972
What about the sex itself?
165
00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:20,308
Was that... I mean, how... how...
166
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:22,018
Well, I would be lying if I didn't say
167
00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:24,187
that there were moments
that I thought to myself,
168
00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:27,190
"Whore, this isn't such
a bad way to earn a living".
169
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:31,987
OK, why don't we just call it casual sex
between consenting adults?
170
00:09:32,029 --> 00:09:34,573
Why don't you just pay me,
and I'll be on my way?
171
00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:36,700
Because then I'd miss you.
172
00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:38,618
You can't snort a line of coke
off a woman's ass
173
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,704
and not wonder
about her hopes and dreams.
174
00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:41,830
It's not gentlemanly.
175
00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:45,333
If you want to keep me on the clock, I'll tell
you what I wanted to be when I grew up.
176
00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:46,835
OK.
177
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,970
Oh.
178
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:00,974
You take Diner's Club?
179
00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:06,146
I'm not kidding.
I don't... I don't have any cash.
180
00:10:06,188 --> 00:10:08,106
You don't have any cash?
181
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:11,359
- I got the one.
- Oh.
182
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:15,071
How's the world's sexiest architect doing?
183
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,531
Grandpa!
184
00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:20,327
Your mother happens to be
a world-class beauty.
185
00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:22,245
Too good for this mutt father of yours.
186
00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:24,414
I'm remodelling a place in Venice.
187
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,792
- The client wants it all green.
- Painted green?
188
00:10:27,835 --> 00:10:30,045
Who is he... the Jolly Green Giant?
189
00:10:30,087 --> 00:10:32,839
You have no idea
how close you are to the truth.
190
00:10:32,882 --> 00:10:36,509
You should meet this guy.
He's a total dial tone.
191
00:10:36,552 --> 00:10:38,928
Just a...
192
00:10:40,931 --> 00:10:42,390
He's paying me very well.
193
00:10:42,433 --> 00:10:45,852
He's got great taste,
and he's not an earth-hater.
194
00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:47,270
What's not to like?
195
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,731
Maybe the fact that he seems
to have a huge crush on you.
196
00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:53,360
- Oh, please. He does not.
- Becca agrees with me.
197
00:10:53,402 --> 00:10:56,112
He does get a little goofy around you, Mom.
198
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:57,989
See? He gets goofy around you.
199
00:10:58,032 --> 00:11:02,285
What about all those actresses
on your set?
200
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,204
Oh, come on.
201
00:11:04,246 --> 00:11:06,331
Yeah, I think I met one of those today.
202
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,876
You better be careful, Karen.
This one was sex on a stick.
203
00:11:09,919 --> 00:11:12,170
No, no, I didn't think
she was that attractive.
204
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:14,464
I thought she was more
of an eyesore, really.
205
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:18,802
Are you kidding... the way she hugged you?
It almost triggered my angina.
206
00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:22,263
Well-played, Pop.
Come again soon... please.
207
00:11:22,306 --> 00:11:26,267
What's an angina?
Do I have one of those?
208
00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:28,812
No, sweetie.
209
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:32,023
Do you want to come to the zoo
with us tomorrow, Grandpa?
210
00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:35,068
Would that I could, my love,
but I have to go down to San Diego
211
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:36,861
to see an old friend.
212
00:11:36,904 --> 00:11:38,905
Do you want to come with us, Dad?
213
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:41,700
I'm sorry, baby. I've got to work. I can't.
214
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,619
That's why you're here?
215
00:11:44,662 --> 00:11:47,497
Come on, don't be
such a whiny little bitch, Hank.
216
00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:49,791
Once again, my apologies, miss.
217
00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:53,128
He is sometimes... a whiny little bitch.
218
00:11:53,170 --> 00:11:55,380
- Hey!
- Rebecca, that's not funny.
219
00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,756
That's really not funny.
220
00:11:57,883 --> 00:11:59,926
That little fuzz coming
from your bottom lip...
221
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,971
Are you gonna be
a trumpet player or something?
222
00:12:03,013 --> 00:12:05,598
Yeah, I'm gonna be a trumpet player.
223
00:12:12,356 --> 00:12:15,024
- Breathe. Count to ten.
- It just pisses me off.
224
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:17,485
Becca actually wants
to spend time with the guy,
225
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:20,029
and he's got to go run off
and visit some old cooze
226
00:12:20,072 --> 00:12:22,157
he was banging on the side 30 years ago.
227
00:12:22,199 --> 00:12:23,950
- Shh.
- What?
228
00:12:24,034 --> 00:12:25,869
Why do you even care any more?
229
00:12:25,911 --> 00:12:27,912
Because that's exactly the type of shit
230
00:12:27,955 --> 00:12:30,206
that put my mother
into an early grave, that's why.
231
00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:33,251
Hank, he's an old man.
Give the guy a break.
232
00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:36,296
Whatever wrongs he's committed,
just put them to one side.
233
00:12:36,338 --> 00:12:38,089
You're not gonna change it now.
234
00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:40,300
Anyway, the guy probably has
three erections left.
235
00:12:40,342 --> 00:12:41,634
You should let him enjoy them.
236
00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:44,179
That fucker is the horniest man
I have ever met.
237
00:12:44,221 --> 00:12:46,181
He'll be pitching a tent on his deathbed.
238
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:51,895
I don't know why you're so pissed at him
for not spending time with his family.
239
00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:52,979
You never do.
240
00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:56,441
Oh, do not... do not turn this around on me.
241
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:58,985
Hank, I know you're busy.
It comes with the territory.
242
00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:02,739
But I have not had a conversation with you
for, like, three months.
243
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,824
You just don't give a shit any more.
244
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:08,995
Your head is so far up your own ass,
and you don't even know it.
245
00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,916
- Really?
- Yeah, really.
246
00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:19,047
I think you're right.
247
00:13:19,089 --> 00:13:21,925
You're only saying that
cos you feel sorry for me.
248
00:13:25,721 --> 00:13:27,722
OK, here's the plan.
249
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,058
As soon as I finish the movie,
250
00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:33,269
we pack up the car
and go back to New York City.
251
00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:37,607
- Hank, how can you be so self-absorbed?
- What?
252
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:40,401
We came here for you, right?
I had nothing here.
253
00:13:40,444 --> 00:13:42,779
And now that I've started
to make things work for me
254
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:46,741
and I'm earning a living,
it just means nothing to you.
255
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,868
You're redesigning houses for assholes.
256
00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,871
How is that any different
from redesigning scripts for assholes?
257
00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:53,122
It's not. That's my point.
258
00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,959
We got to get out of here before
the city destroys us both.
259
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:58,378
You know, it's really not the city.
260
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:04,926
Come on, Tiny Dancer.
Is that the best you got?
261
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:07,220
Oh, not the face. He's too cute.
262
00:14:07,263 --> 00:14:09,806
Thank...
263
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,559
Fuck!
264
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,103
Your pimp hand is strong.
265
00:14:15,145 --> 00:14:17,397
Well-played, son.
266
00:14:18,190 --> 00:14:20,108
That's not funny.
267
00:14:21,235 --> 00:14:22,318
You OK?
268
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:24,487
All right, what are we talking about here?
What does he owe?
269
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:27,198
You make me an offer,
I will counter the shit out of it.
270
00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:30,368
We will handle this like the proud,
beautiful black men we are.
271
00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:35,790
- I need something for the valet.
- Both our pimps are here.
272
00:14:35,833 --> 00:14:37,876
Mine gets 10%. What does yours get?
273
00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:39,669
10% of what exactly?
274
00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:42,088
- See you later, sweetie.
- Bye.
275
00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:48,136
- A veterinarian.
- Huh? What?
276
00:14:48,178 --> 00:14:50,847
I always wanted to be
a veterinarian when I grew up.
277
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,892
Oh. Well, you know, it's never too late.
278
00:14:53,934 --> 00:14:56,060
Good night.
279
00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:01,608
OK, big boy.
280
00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:04,611
Here we go. You just cry it out.
281
00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:07,405
- It hurts.
- I know it hurts.
282
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:10,116
No, you're fucking hurting me.
283
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:11,743
- I'm sorry.
- You're hurting my ears.
284
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:16,039
Why are you crying?
285
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,541
I'm sorry about your old man.
He was a good guy.
286
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:21,419
He was not. He used to say
you looked like a walking penis.
287
00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:25,506
- Well, that's not very nice.
- It's not.
288
00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:29,761
All right, come on.
We got to get you on a plane.
289
00:15:29,803 --> 00:15:32,138
- Fuck that.
- No, fuck you.
290
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:35,767
You're going on a plane to JFK tonight.
You're gonna be with your sisters.
291
00:15:35,809 --> 00:15:38,061
You deal with this shit.
You don't run from it.
292
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,687
Don't tell me what to feel.
293
00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:43,066
All my fucking life, people have been
telling me I do things wrong.
294
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:44,359
I'm always the fucking asshole.
295
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:48,196
And I look around and I see everybody else
is infinitely more fucked up than I am.
296
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,114
I don't know those people.
297
00:15:50,824 --> 00:15:52,450
It could be the blow.
298
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,788
Yum.
299
00:16:02,544 --> 00:16:04,504
Married or not,
300
00:16:04,546 --> 00:16:07,548
that's a hell of a family you got there, kiddo.
301
00:16:07,591 --> 00:16:09,133
I like to think so.
302
00:16:09,176 --> 00:16:12,804
- Can I give you a bit of advice?
- Do I have a choice?
303
00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:16,140
I know things are crazy for you right now...
304
00:16:16,183 --> 00:16:18,685
I've been there, in my own way.
305
00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:21,854
Just don't go so far
that you cannot find your way back.
306
00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:24,190
That's all I'm saying. Keep 'em close.
307
00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:25,984
Family comes first.
308
00:16:26,026 --> 00:16:29,112
That borders on hysterical,
coming from you and all.
309
00:16:29,154 --> 00:16:32,740
What, I was so bad? Your mother
and I were together till the bitter end.
310
00:16:32,783 --> 00:16:35,493
Bitter, it was.
I can't believe you're gonna sit there
311
00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:37,328
and pretend to be all noble about this shit.
312
00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:40,164
If you've got something
on your mind, out with it.
313
00:16:40,207 --> 00:16:42,875
You were always fucking someone else.
314
00:16:42,918 --> 00:16:46,254
Your mother and I had a lot of problems.
315
00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:50,008
We were married young,
and we were not compatible in that way.
316
00:16:50,050 --> 00:16:53,261
- You know what I mean?
- I think I do, and I'd like somebody
317
00:16:53,303 --> 00:16:57,557
to fuckin' smack me over the head
with a shovel right now... anyone.
318
00:16:57,599 --> 00:17:00,852
I'm not proud of some of the things I do,
but if I had to do it all over again,
319
00:17:00,894 --> 00:17:04,439
- I'm not sure I would go at it any differently.
- Why do you say that?
320
00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:07,108
Because there's not a woman
that I've crossed paths with
321
00:17:07,151 --> 00:17:08,985
that I haven't fallen in love with,
322
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:11,154
whether it was for ten minutes or ten years.
323
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:14,282
What would have been better...
a lifetime of denying that?
324
00:17:14,324 --> 00:17:17,827
Your mother was into all that
Catholic guilt shit, not me.
325
00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:20,455
Life's too short to dance with fat chicks.
326
00:17:20,497 --> 00:17:21,914
Let me get this straight...
327
00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:24,709
The lesson here is keep the family together
328
00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:28,212
and fuck around on the side if your wife
doesn't want to blow you any more.
329
00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:32,341
You watch it. I'm not so old
that I won't kick the shit out of you.
330
00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:35,011
- I remember that shit, too.
- So now I beat you?
331
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,888
You know what the problem
with your generation is?
332
00:17:36,930 --> 00:17:39,891
You think raising a hand to a kid
is the same as child abuse.
333
00:17:39,933 --> 00:17:43,978
I don't have it right in front of me,
but I think that's the textbook definition.
334
00:17:44,021 --> 00:17:48,733
Always the smartass. Hey, it's your life...
yours to screw up if you want to.
335
00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,447
I was here a year ago.
336
00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:58,993
You were much happier then...
and even happier the year before that.
337
00:18:00,454 --> 00:18:03,790
You're not going in the right direction.
That's all I'm saying.
338
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,112
I swear to fucking God, Karen,
339
00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:36,447
I am not sleeping with anyone else.
340
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:39,200
Well, you're certainly
not sleeping with me.
341
00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:43,371
How is that my fault? Every time I get
even remotely close to you,
342
00:18:43,413 --> 00:18:45,123
you run halfway across the room.
343
00:18:45,165 --> 00:18:47,667
No, I don't. Anyway,
that didn't use to stop you.
344
00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:49,418
You know what the weirdest thing is?
345
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:51,462
I actually wish you were having an affair
346
00:18:51,505 --> 00:18:54,048
because then I would stop
looking for clues everywhere.
347
00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:57,385
- I would never do that to you.
- You say that.
348
00:18:57,427 --> 00:19:00,930
That's just cos that's
your fucking romantic ideal,
349
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,890
but the truth is, you think about it.
350
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:06,894
- Yes, I think about it. Who doesn't?
- Well, I never did.
351
00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:09,063
Never did?
352
00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:11,649
Past tense... that's a little unsettling.
353
00:19:11,692 --> 00:19:14,110
Hank, you should try and live with someone
354
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,737
who every day reminds you how
fucking lucky you are to be with them!
355
00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:20,408
- God damn it, that is not how I feel.
- That is how you act.
356
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:24,328
Well, fuck, Karen. It's life, then.
I guess it's hard sometimes.
357
00:19:24,371 --> 00:19:27,748
- You're gonna have to deal with it.
- I am trying to deal with it!
358
00:19:27,791 --> 00:19:30,293
That's why I'm having
this conversation with you.
359
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,336
Hank, we need to go see someone.
360
00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:34,589
I am not going to a fucking shrink!
361
00:19:34,631 --> 00:19:37,216
I'm a writer! I don't give that shit away.
362
00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:39,635
- We're better than that!
- We're better than that?
363
00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:42,930
Because it feels to me like
we're fucking dying here, Hank.
364
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:45,892
We are not talking. We are not fucking.
365
00:19:45,934 --> 00:19:47,685
Nothing is happening.
366
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:49,770
And?
367
00:19:49,813 --> 00:19:54,066
And I find myself wanting
to talk to other people.
368
00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:55,902
Like Bill?
369
00:19:56,820 --> 00:20:00,198
You fucking talking to Bill?
The Jolly Green Giant?
370
00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:04,076
- I'm kidding, Karen.
- I don't even want to go down that road.
371
00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:07,413
Have you fucked him?
372
00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:10,708
It's so fucking typical.
373
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:13,252
You go straight to the fucking.
374
00:20:13,295 --> 00:20:16,005
You don't even care if I'm talking to him,
if I'm telling him things...
375
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:18,007
Just answer the fucking question!
376
00:20:19,259 --> 00:20:21,469
You didn't answer me.
377
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:24,639
Yes, I did.
378
00:20:24,681 --> 00:20:26,349
You know me.
379
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:29,894
The talking and the fucking
go hand in hand, Hank.
380
00:20:36,068 --> 00:20:39,111
- I got to get the fuck out of here.
- No, no. You know what?
381
00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:41,113
- Allow me to do that.
- Come here.
382
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:42,740
No.
383
00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:50,915
Hank, this isn't gonna work.
OK? It's not gonna...
384
00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:53,459
- Stop!
- Let me go!
385
00:21:02,719 --> 00:21:04,845
- Is it safe?
- I don't know, honey.
386
00:21:04,888 --> 00:21:06,555
You might want to grab a helmet.
387
00:21:06,598 --> 00:21:09,183
There could be some shrapnel
flying around.
388
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:11,060
Are you guys going to get a divorce?
389
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:14,313
I think that's the good thing
about never being married...
390
00:21:14,356 --> 00:21:16,315
it's impossible to get a divorce.
391
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:18,442
You know what I mean.
392
00:21:18,485 --> 00:21:23,155
I know what you mean,
and I'm doing the best I can.
393
00:22:33,018 --> 00:22:34,352
Hey.
394
00:22:44,905 --> 00:22:46,155
Yeah.
395
00:22:57,751 --> 00:23:00,461
"To my son, the writer.
396
00:23:00,504 --> 00:23:04,548
"Something I never said
too much... I love you.
397
00:23:05,425 --> 00:23:07,802
"My father
never said it much, either.
398
00:23:07,844 --> 00:23:10,888
"And I thought I'd be different,
but I guess I'm not.
399
00:23:10,931 --> 00:23:14,225
"I tried, but somewhere along the line,
you slip back into what you know,
400
00:23:14,309 --> 00:23:16,435
"and I'm sorry about that.
401
00:23:16,478 --> 00:23:20,147
"And I'm sorry we haven't talked
in a while because I miss you.
402
00:23:20,190 --> 00:23:23,109
"You're a good kid and a funny kid.
403
00:23:23,151 --> 00:23:25,694
"And you're my only son.
404
00:23:25,779 --> 00:23:29,323
"I said I never read your books, but I lied.
405
00:23:29,366 --> 00:23:30,825
"I read 'em all.
406
00:23:30,867 --> 00:23:33,244
"I just didn't know how
to talk about them with you.
407
00:23:33,912 --> 00:23:36,622
"I didn't like the fathers in them.
408
00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,624
"I know you writers take liberties,
409
00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:42,128
"but I was afraid that maybe
you didn't take any at all.
410
00:23:42,170 --> 00:23:43,754
"But that's the thing...
411
00:23:43,797 --> 00:23:47,299
"Boys become men, and men
become husbands and fathers.
412
00:23:47,342 --> 00:23:50,302
"And we do the best we can.
413
00:23:50,345 --> 00:23:52,930
"You're doing the best you can.
414
00:23:52,973 --> 00:23:54,390
"You've done good.
415
00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:57,560
"Your books will be in libraries
long after we're both gone,
416
00:23:57,602 --> 00:23:58,853
"and this is important.
417
00:24:00,063 --> 00:24:02,982
"More important
is how you treat your family.
418
00:24:03,024 --> 00:24:06,819
"I wasn't a perfect husband,
but I loved your mother,
419
00:24:06,862 --> 00:24:09,864
"and I'm glad we spent our lives together.
420
00:24:09,906 --> 00:24:11,949
"And I'm here if you need me.
421
00:24:11,992 --> 00:24:14,994
"That's all I wanted to say.
422
00:24:15,036 --> 00:24:17,288
"Love, your old man".
423
00:24:19,374 --> 00:24:23,836
Oh, "PS... I saw a preview
of your movie the other night.
424
00:24:25,005 --> 00:24:27,006
"It looks like a piece of shit.
425
00:24:27,549 --> 00:24:29,717
"Maybe you were right".
426
00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:10,859
The white zone
is for the immediate loading
427
00:26:10,902 --> 00:26:13,487
and unloading of passengers only.
428
00:26:18,076 --> 00:26:20,327
So, we'll be right behind you.
429
00:26:21,413 --> 00:26:24,081
The moment Becca gets out of school,
we'll get a flight.
430
00:26:39,889 --> 00:26:42,057
I love you.
431
00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:44,518
Hank...
432
00:26:44,561 --> 00:26:48,564
I didn't say it to hear it back.
433
00:26:56,865 --> 00:26:59,575
Thanks for helping me...
434
00:26:59,618 --> 00:27:02,786
get my head out of my ass.
435
00:27:02,829 --> 00:27:04,622
It's what I do.
436
00:27:22,849 --> 00:27:27,144
Hey, Karen, do you know
what this is called?
437
00:27:27,187 --> 00:27:29,605
Yeah, it's a jacaranda tree.
33018
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