All language subtitles for 5rFF-lastletyourlover.eng

Everything's going
to be fine, darling.

Madam, it's so wonderful to see you.

Welcome home from the hospital.

Jenny, this is Mrs. Cordoza.

Yes. Thank you.

I'll show you to your room, madam.

Everything is just
as you like it.

I'm so happy to have you back home.

Good night, dear Jenny.

Good night, Lawrence.

Larry.

You call me Larry.

Larry.

Hey.

Hey.

Oh hey! Um…

Fancy seeing you here.

Uh…

I actually…

I have to sort of
start getting ready for work, so…

I might have to ask you to, um…

-to, uh…
-Um.

-If you don't mind.
-This is actually my flat. So…

Oh shit. Um…

Well, in that case, at ease, monsieur.

No problemo.

Love to see you again.

As in, um…

I had a really great time last night.

Um, well, the thing is, Rob, I'm just--

My name's not Rob.

Um…

-Andrew.
-Andrew.

Um…

I actually… I just sort of came out
of quite a straight-up soul-destroying…

So, thank you.

-I'm just saying I can give you my number.
-Or you could not.

And we could avoid the whole me
feeling guilty and never calling you back.

You feeling dejected,
never hearing from me again.

I feel so used.

Well, you know what, Rob?
Welcome to my world.

-Name's not Rob.
-Andrew.

Fuck, sorry.

Well, Andrew,

it's been very nice meeting you,
and you have a lovely day.

- Ellie?
- Yes.

♪ Tried to withdraw a guilty plea ♪

♪ Damn!
You ain't gonna pin this one on me ♪

♪ One thing's for sure
I'm not sleeping here tonight ♪

♪ And I'm not interested
In what you think is bad ♪

♪ But I get so lonely
I can't relate to anyone ♪

♪ And my heart is crying out
I'm on my knees ♪

♪ I'm begging you please… ♪

How's it going?

Staff meeting in five.

Nick?

Nick!

I'm not talking to you, Ellie, because
that only involves me losing my shit.

What did I do?

I get it. You've had a shit year, Ellie,

but it is just not cool
to so flagrantly disrespect us.

- What are you talking about?
- You abandoned us last night.

We heard you went off with a random guy!
How do you think that'd make us feel?

- All right. I'm sorry.
- And on my birthday.

I'm… I'm really sorry. Nick.

I'm serious.

Are you stressed? You seem stressed.

Mary Ellen died,
and Janet wants a feature.

There are not enough hours in the day.

-When?
-Sunday's edition.

No, when did she die?

-A couple of days ago.
-That's so sad.

-How?
-Yeah, old age.

-Yeah?
-You know, I really wanna die that way.

Why don't I take this one?

I've got two hours left on this polish,
and then my schedule is wide open.

Okay?

Okay. Okay.

Consider your load
officially lightened, my friend.

- Morning, everyone.
- Morning.

How are we all?

- Good.
- Great.

- Hi.
- Hi.

How you doing?

Good. Thanks.

Uh, I'm writing a feature on the paper's
longest-serving women's editor.

-She just died.
-Yeah? Oh no.

Yeah, no.

It's my understanding she donated

her collection of writings
to the Archives.

What time was…
What's your appointment, sorry?

Oh, no, sorry. I… um… I work here.

Yeah, no, the thing is you…
you still need to make an appointment.

-We can't--
-Even for staff?

We don't just let people into the archive.

Even though I work here.

Yeah, no, sorry. Um…

So if you… if you go online, um,
you can find our online catalog

and then decide, uh,
whatever it is you wanna view.

But I've done it a million times before--

Yeah, um, and then either myself
or someone from the Archive team

readies your documents.

In which case, I would love
to make an appointment, please.

Appointments have to be made
online through our…

Seriously?

…online portal.

Online portal.

You know what?

Thanks so much
for all your help today, and

I will see you again sometime soon.

I wish I could lose my memory.

I'd run off into the sunset and forget
I ever married Francis in the first place.

Do you know how it happened?
Where I was going?

Larry says you were out running errands.

Beyond that, I'm sorry. I don't.

-So you really don't remember anything?
-I remember in gaps.

I don't know
how I'm meant to behave. I don't know….

I don't know
how I felt about my life.

I don't…

All right, darling. I'll fill you in.

You were lovely and funny
and full of joie de vivre.

You have the perfect life,
the cleverest best friend.

The rich, handsome husband who adores you.

Do you know why we don't have children?

He's away an awful lot, your husband.

It's one of the reasons
I've always been horribly envious of you.

Oh, you'll be fine, darling.

In the meantime, try to have fun tonight.

Yeah.

I don't believe it!

Harold Wilson?

The Harold Wilson?

The very same.

Please tell me
he took you somewhere scrumptious.

- Lockets.
- Oh!

His favorite place
to holiday is the Scilly Isles…

…party now has a chance
of getting a larger majority.

Gentlemen, this is all well
and good, but what we really want to know

is what does
the prime minister like for dessert?

Darling, I think that's enough.

-But it's just my second--
-Doctor's orders.

Just water.

Speaking of which,
you really don't remember anything?

- Anne!
- What?

How about some coffee? Anyone?

Yes, please.

Hi.

-Hi.
-How you doing?

Uh-huh.

-You?
-Phenomenal.

Um, everything's ready for you
in the reading room.

Hmm.

Spectacular.

And sorry, we don't allow food and drink.

Oh.

Hmm.

Right this way.

So, this is everything
from about '65 up until around '86, '87.

These are her actual notebooks?

Yep, they should be. Yeah.

Thanks.

Um, I just wanted to say quickly, uh,
I really enjoyed your, uh, feature on

starter marriages
and all the, like, online dating stuff.

-Oh yeah?
-Yeah, yeah.

The bit about, you know, the difference
between passionate and companionate love.

Yeah, I never really thought of it
like that before.

Thanks.

It gives me a warm, gooey feeling

knowing my unadulterated misery
has finally been put to good use.

So, um, how does someone like you end up
making their living as an archivist?

I studied art history actually.

And went on to do
a postgrad in Records Management, but…

…um, you know,
at that point, I sort of realized,

um, I sort of enjoy
categorizing stuff, oddly enough.

And, you know,
people think it's a bit odd…

My dearest and only love,

I know you're frightened,

but believe me when I say
I've known nothing like this before

and can assure that I never will again.

I know I will never be satisfied
with just a part of you.

And for that reason,
I'm going to take the job in New York.

I'll be on platform two,
Marylebone, Friday, 7:15 p.m.

Come with me, darling. Spare him a life
half-lived, a marriage of convenience.

More importantly, spare yourself.

Seize this thing
that is true and real and infinite.

Yes, it is scary,
but I believe living a lie is worse.

We could be happy.

So happy.

Know that you hold my heart,
my hopes in your hands.

Your Boot.

…historical materials.

-I… I… I think it's actually--
-Look at this!

Huh?

Um, what is it?

It's a letter.

Hmm. Jeez.

Yeah, sad thing is if you're gonna elope
now, you'll probably just send a text.

WhatsApp.

Yeah, it'd be like, "Hey, babes, meet me
at the station if you're interested."

#ComeWithIfYouWannaChangeYourLifeForever,

smiley face, aubergine,
road sign, sausage.

The worst thing is when you can see
they've read the message you've sent,

and the little blue tick appears, and…

-That's the worst.
-"Hello, I sent a message five days ago."

Five hours ago!

-I mean.
-Did I say days?

I think so, yeah.

-Can I see the envelope, please?
-Yeah.

-"J.S." Must be in here by mistake.
-What do you think you will do with it?

Burn it.

No, I'm kidding. Probably make sure
it gets properly cataloged.

Don't, what about returning it?

Hmm.

Or trying to track down whoever sent it.

"Dearest J, I know what
the situation cost you, darling Jenny."

"But I also know
that you and I could no more

not love each other than the Earth
could stop circling the Sun."

"You were upset the last time we parted,
and I cursed myself for it."

"My frustration overwhelms me."

"There is never enough time,
never enough of you."

"Let's meet tomorrow. B."

"My darling J,

I'm still lost somewhere between our time
dancing the night away at Alberto's

and being together on the Riviera."

B?

"Felipe told me I was like a drunken fool

as I remembered
those summer days together."

"If all we are allowed
are hours and minutes,

I will etch them on to my memory
so I can recall them in the same way

that when I close my eyes,
I see your heavenly face."

"You are never far
from my thoughts. Your Boot."

♪ Strawberries, cherries
And an angel's kiss in spring ♪

♪ My summer wine is really made
From all these things ♪

♪ Take off your silver spurs
And help me pass the time ♪

♪ And I will give to you
Summer wine ♪

♪ Oh, summer wine ♪

♪ My eyes grew heavy
And my lips they could not speak ♪

♪ I tried to get up
But I couldn't find my feet ♪

♪ She reassured me
With an unfamiliar line ♪

♪ And then she gave to me
More summer wine… ♪

Good evening.

Darling, don't forget
we have breakfast in the morning.

I have a journalist
coming tomorrow, first thing.

I'll change it to lunch then.

Dinner, darling. We have dinner.

Larry.

Let's not fuss.

Can I help?

Yes.

I certainly am hoping so.

Am I at all familiar to you?

Don't ring any bells, I'm afraid.

And what if I were to say the name Felipe?

Would that mean anything to you?

- Are you with the police?
- No.

So why are you asking me about Felipe?

Um…

I believe we may have a mutual friend.

Perhaps you might be able to tell me
where I could find him?

I don't think you understand.

Felipe was, uh, in an accident.

He never woke up.

Hey, um, just so you know, we usually have
to close the reading rooms around 5:00.

What time is it now?

Coming up to 20 past.

Shit. Okay. Um…

I'll be two secs.

So, uh, did you find everything all right?

Yeah. Yeah, I guess so.

I mean, if I want to request more stuff,
then I have to go on the, um…

-Via the online. Yeah, same process.
-Via the online.

-The…
-Online portal.

-Process.
-Yeah.

- Where you headed?
- Basement.

Um, what if I wanted to see if there were

any more of those letters?
Could be a story in it.

If you wanted to,
you could just send me an email, actually.

-If you wanted to speed things up a bit.
-Oh.

Thanks.

Turning into a real rebel.

Have a good one.

Have a good week.

Anthony O'Hare.

Oh, yes.

You're here to write marvelous things
about my husband, I believe.

Is that right?

"Beacon of sound commercial practice,
turnover increasing year after year."

-Are you asking me or telling me?
-I'm his wife. I can hardly be impartial.

In my experience, there's no one
more brutally impartial than a wife.

Indeed.

I'm afraid Larry is running a little late.

Perhaps not so marvelous after all.

Um, may we offer you
a drink in the meantime?

No, thank you.

Mr. O'Hare.

Mr. Stirling.

-Please accept my apologies.
-Not a problem.

-Shall we start?
-Ah, yeah. I'm ready whenever you are.

I don't know how
I didn't end up in the most awful trouble.

What about you, Mr. O'Hare?
You're a financial journalist.

- Foreign correspondent.
- Where have you been recently?

Well, Léopoldville, mainly. Brazzaville.

Godawful place if you ask me.

And where this evening's exemplary
host has a great deal of business.

Well, I think that--

I felt the Belgians
were doing a perfectly good job

of running the place themselves.

With respect, I was there
in '59, '60, and again in '62--

So you of all people should understand

that mutiny and rebellion
are an inferior and foolhardy response--

To centuries of oppression?

I would suggest that taking back control

politically, geographically
is an entirely appropriate--

Would one be correct in assuming
that you are a supporter of Mr. Mobutu's?

Larry, Mobutu's a dictator.
I doubt very much--

Yes, darling, I am aware.
Thank you.

Enough, enough. This is all
far too depressing for the dinner table.

My wife considers
anything not in the pages of Vogue

unworthy of her time and attention.

I'll get out and meet
as many people as possible,

travel the world because people like that,

they make me want to stick a revolver
in my mouth and pull the trigger.

And the women, Jesus!

Spoiled little tai-tais

with barely an original thought
to string together between them--

I'm sorry we were such a disappointment.

Christ, I'm, uh… I'm drunk.

Evidently.

Perhaps, the next time you find yourself
in the company of such bores,

you'd do well to leave early.

I just ask that whatever your views
of me and my spoiled life,

you won't attack Larry in print.

Please excuse me.

Goodness, I have
the most splitting headache. Last night.

Did you really drink that much?

I have a fine feeling I did.

-Mr. O'Hare.
-Mrs. Stirling.

What are you doing?

Uh.

I wanted to give you…

this.

What is it?

It's an apology.

Well, please.

- Read it.
- Jennifer.

Mr. O'Hare has written it. I'm sure he's
perfectly capable of reading it aloud.

"Mrs. Stirling…

I am an ungracious pig."

"I'd like to be able to blame exhaustion

or some uncharacteristic reaction
to shellfish,

but I am afraid
it was the combination of the alcohol,

which I shouldn't take, and the
choleric temper of the socially inept."

"There is little you could say
about me that I have not already deduced

about myself in my more sober hours."

"Please allow me to apologize."

"Yours shamefacedly, Anthony O'Hare."

If at all possible, I'd love
to take you and your husband to lunch.

Hmm. How very kind of you.

I'll think on it.

In the meantime,
I must return you to your hotel.

I won't be responsible
for you contracting sunstroke.

Not to mention alcohol poisoning.

Yes.

Please.

Thank you.

Larry.

-Mr. O'Hare.
-Mr. Stirling. How are you?

-Very well. Thank you.
-Mrs. Stirling.

Hi.

How are you?

I'm fine. Thank you.

Tell me, Mr. O'Hare.
Is there a Mrs. O'Hare?

Yes, there was.
Uh, Mrs. O'Hare and I divorced.

Well, you have my condolences.

It's a ghastly business.

- Children?
- Larry, for goodness sake.

No, no, no, it's quite all right.
Yes, I have one son, Peter.

I was at Gordonstoun
with a terrific chap by the name of Peter.

English.

Where are you off to next?

After I finish the piece,
back home to London.

- Excuse me.
- Of course.

I apologize.

It's okay.

Aren't you drinking?

Um, no, I'm not meant to.

A headache?

Doctor's orders.

So you really found
last night that unbearable?

I admit it. I find armed conflict
a less daunting prospect.

You're William Boot from Scoop.

-Evelyn Waugh?
-I know who William Boot is.

Is everything all right?

Duty calls.

Tell me, Mr. O'Hare.
How are your sea legs?

Thank you.

What do you think?

Big.

Of the view.

Hmm.

See that over there?

It's Corsica.

You travel a lot?

I don't, actually.

We come here every summer, but I haven't
been back overseas since we married,

not even to see family.

Larry does all the traveling now.

How'd you two meet?

We were seated next to one another
at a company dinner in New York.

Our fathers used to work together.
He asked me out, and that was that.

That simple?

It was. A few months later,
he asked me to marry him, and I said yes.

My parents were delighted.

How so?

Good family. Good job.

Those things are important
to you, are they?

Aren't they to everyone?

I guess so.

I want you to tell me about your son.

-My son?
-Hmm.

Lives with my ex-wife who does her best
to make sure I don't corrupt him.

And why would she think
you would corrupt him?

Because I was unfaithful.

You must miss him.

I do.

Sometimes I wonder whether if I'd've done
what I did if I'd've known quite how much.

Is that why you drink?

Don't try to fix me, Mrs. Stirling.

Who said I was trying--

Oh, you have that charitable air
about you. It makes me feel nervous.

Well, I'm guessing
I wouldn't be the first.

You'd make a very good journalist.

Did you love her? Your wife?

I thought I did before, but we were young,
and I'm not sure I knew what love was.

-Have you ever loved anyone?
-My son. Have you ever loved anyone?

I'm married.

You are.

For the record,
Larry and I are perfectly content.

I'm glad to hear it.

Features.

Yeah, hi, I was wondering
if I could speak to Ellie Haworth, please?

Speaking.

Oh, hi. Yeah, it's…
it's Rory from Archive.

I think I might have maybe found something
you might want to come and take a look at.

Hi, hi. Is, oh--

-Uh, is that gum?
-Uh-huh.

Yeah, we don't… we don't love gum
in the reading rooms.

-Swallowed it.
-Great.

Okay. Um…

I found another letter.

"It's 4:00 a.m.,
and I can't sleep."

"It's like The Road to Madness,

but I lie here imagining him next to you,

his license to touch you, to hold you,

and I would do anything
to make that freedom mine."

"For as long as I can't have you,
I'll conjure you here instead."

"Your scent, your hair,

that slow sideways smile
when something I say amuses you."

"Darling J, I've never wished harder
for the dawn. Your Boot."

Mmm. It's definitely…

Definitely the same.

Yeah, it's the same kind
of envelope, same handwriting.

Now I'm going
to have to know how it ends,

which means not only is the rest of my day
fucked, but, guess what, so is yours.

How fucked are we talking?

Well, I have to know
if there are more of these.

Uh, yes, um…

The only problem is, at this stage, um,
if we're gonna find out if there are more,

it's probably gonna require
going down to the actual archive.

Great! Oh my God! Let's do it!

Yeah, but to do that,
we need a special permission.

Um…

How do we do that?

Well, there's a form, and then after that
is probably, well, another form, actually.

Sounds… sounds easy enough.

Let me… let me see what I can do.

Thank you.

-Cool.
-Cool.

♪ There's a little bird
That somebody sends ♪

♪ Down to the earth to live on the wind ♪

♪ Born on the wind
And he sleeps on the wind ♪

♪ This little bird that somebody sends ♪

♪ He's light and fragile
And feathered sky blue ♪

♪ So thin and graceful
The sun shines through… ♪

Dear Mr. O'Hare,
or shall I call you Boot?

Larry called away overseas last minute.

It would appear we are both
marooned here until he returns.

And you without proper beach attire,
how embarrassing.

Care to pass the time
together this afternoon?

I know a darling little shop where
you could find your next seaside tome.

Yours, J.

♪ Borne on the wind ♪

Dear Mrs. Stirling,
or may I call you J?

Thank you for the offer
and frankly, for the rescue.

I'm indebted to you for persuading me
out of my room yesterday.

I would love to return the favor.

I know nowhere, of course,
but if you can suggest a place,

I can keep you laughing
with my terrible schoolboy French.

Dear Boot, I'm delighted
I managed to propel you,

blinking, into the sunlight.

I would be happy
to take you up on your invitation.

Perhaps we can spend a few hours
in town commiserating over our mutual

inadequacies with the local language.
Are you free on Thursday?

I'm free Thursday, but
I'm also free tomorrow and the day after

and the day after that as well.

By the time Mr. Stirling returns,

we could very well cover
the entire coastline.

Let me know what time suits you. Boot.

♪ Out of reach of human eye♪

♪ And the only time
That he touches the ground ♪

♪ Is when that little bird ♪

♪ Is when that little bird ♪

♪ Is when that little bird dies ♪

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Any ideas?

How about a picnic?

It's a children's game that I used to play
with my son. Do you know it?

You need to close your eyes.

Come on, close them.

Pick a favorite spot.

Real or imagined?

Either.

Imagine that we have everything we need,
the perfect blanket, plenty of cheese.

-Bread?
-Bread, and there's a river nearby.

Oh, a river.

And my son, he loves to, uh, fish.

So I hope you don't mind, um,
we try our hand at a little fishing.

I'm afraid
I know next to nothing about fishing.

Which is why I'm going to teach you.

How am I doing, Mr. Boot?

You're a natural, as it goes.

Of course I am.

And you catch a trout.

Shark.

Shark. Excellent work.

And afterwards…

out of the leftover teeth,
I fashion you a necklace.

A souvenir.

A talisman.

Let's try again. Shall we?

Thank you
for an immensely agreeable afternoon.

Until next time.

♪ Your love is like a drug ♪

♪ That’s why I can’t get enough ♪

♪ I’m lonesome for your touch ♪

♪ That’s why I can’t get enough ♪

Mary Ellen piece
proofed and attached.

Oh, and another thing,
while I was researching,

I came across some mysterious
old love letters among her things.

Not sure how or why they ended up there,
but digging into it for my next feature,

1965, illicit love affair.

They're so rich in feeling.
I've never read anything quite like it.

Have it to you by Friday.

Mr. O'Hare
isn't quite ready yet.

He suggests either you are very welcome
to wait down here or head upstairs.

Room 302.

What a lovely surprise.

Sorry. I'm a little early.
Would you rather I waited downstairs?

No. Don't be silly. Come in.

I won't be long.

I was just about to have a shave.

-Oh.
-Do I have time?

Of course, go ahead.

♪ Take me for granted ♪

♪ Leaving love unsure ♪

♪ Makes willpower weak ♪

Is everything all right?

Yes, yes. Fine.

♪ And temptation strong ♪

♪ A woman's only human ♪

♪ You should understand ♪

♪ She's not just a plaything… ♪

I've received a wire.

Larry's back this evening.

He is to return to London immediately.

I see.

And what do you want?

♪ You've got to be
A do-right-all-night man ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah
They say that it's a man's world ♪

♪ But you can't prove that by me ♪

♪ And as long as we're together, baby ♪

♪ Show some respect for me ♪

I'm sorry.

♪ If you want a do-right-all-day woman… ♪

Oh God.

Jennifer.

Jennifer.

Mrs. Stirling,
this just came for you.

Thank you.

Dearest J, please know
that I was not rejecting you.

I have never wanted
to kiss someone so badly,

but when you looked up at me,
something changed.

And in that moment,
I feared our desires would destroy us.

You're an honest, remarkable creature,

and I did not want to be responsible
for making you someone less than you are.

For that reason,
I've spent the last week hating myself

for the one decent thing I've ever done.

So consider this. Spontaneity is
at the heart of many wonderful things,

but it is also
at the root of much discontent.

And if we are to embark upon something,

I ask only that we
make this decision as one.

I write these words with you in mind,
and my heart swells.

So whatever the outcome,
let us survive together.

You'll find me
at Postman's Park on Friday at 6:00 p.m.

I'll be there waiting.

Yours, respectfully, Boot.

Boot.

♪ Our love, yeah ♪

♪ Is slowly going on the rocks now
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Tell me
Tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Our love, yeah ♪

♪ Is in double jeopardy… ♪

Felipe!

-How are you?
-Good.

-This is Jennifer. My friend Felipe.
-Nice to meet you.

How's it going? Good?

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it… ♪

Enjoy!

-Thank you.
-Thanks.

-Cheers.
-Cheers.

♪ And if you keep on doin'
Doin' what you're doin' ♪

♪ You know our love will surely end… ♪

Same again.

Come, Mr. Boot. Dance with me.

Have fun, my friend.

♪ Is slowly going on the rocks now ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Tell me
Tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Oh, tell me
Tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it… ♪

♪ Do you need me like I need you ♪

♪ Look at me
I'm crying from holding you ♪

♪ Make me forget the pain that you cause ♪

♪ Understanding is a great thing ♪

♪ If it comes from the heart ♪

♪ If time would stand still
While I'm thinking of you ♪

♪ I think of all the pain
That I wanted of you ♪

♪ To make me forget
The pain that you cause ♪

♪ Understanding is a great thing ♪

♪ If it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Picking up the pieces ♪

♪ Of my broken heart♪

♪ It was real hard ♪

♪ A fragile thing like life ♪

♪ It just don't last so long ♪

♪ It could be for a minute or an hour… ♪

"Seize this thing
that is true, and real, and infinite."

"Yes, it's scary,
but I believe that living a lie is worse."

"We could be happy. So happy."

Hey.

-You beat me to it.
-Yeah, I'm pretty excited.

Yeah. Um, look, I can't make
any promises, though.

Well, thanks for doing this.

Um, before we go in,
you're gonna have to remove your shoes.

-Seriously?
-Kidding.

You're a funny guy.

So this is everything
that's non-cataloged.

Holy moly.

And…

this should be
all of the stuff from 1964 to 1965.

Feel free to get that.

Not important.

Oh, um. I… I…

-Could you give me a hand?
-Yeah, sure.

Careful.

- Not this stuff?
- Yeah, no, not those.

Um…

Um…

-Help you down?
-Great.

-So, um…
-Right, should we…

-Should we get started?
-Yeah. Yeah.

Let's get started.

♪ Made up my mind
Not to quit trying… ♪

My dearest J, there is no sound
sweeter than your knock on the door.

It's like there's always
a part of me waiting for it.

I struggle to focus at work because
my thoughts veer irrevocably back to you.

What do global warfare
and politics matter to me now?

If this carries on,
they'll put me on the gardening pages.

♪ Give you all the love I got ♪

♪ Make you mine, baby ♪

♪ I'll spend all my time… ♪

Close your eyes.

The shadow's
at the foot of the bed, Mr. Boot.

What terrible thing will happen
if you stayed beyond five o'clock?

I'll stay
until it reaches my knees.

-Waist.
-Knees.

Deal.

Eyes.

Close them.

Close them.

Canvas tent
in the middle of the wilderness.

If you insist.

We sleep on a bed of leaves,
bathe in a nearby river.

And when the sun goes down…

…we build a fire.

Hmm.

Thank goodness because I'm ravenous.

-What are we having?
-Wild fruit.

Namely?

Elderberries. Blackberries.

Maybe some dandelion.

Perfect.

Mmm.

Good night, dear Boot.

What?

What is it?

I don't want you to go.

What if we ran away together?

To where?

-How about New York?
-Hmm.

I love New York.

I've been offered a post there.

And I want you to come with me.

Hmm.

Move to New York with me.

-You know I can't.
-Yes, you can.

Yes, you can. We can.

You're just asking me to run away,
to just give up my life?

Well, in order to start a new one, yes.

- And when you grow tired of me?
- That won't happen.

-It has before. What makes this different?
-What makes-- Everything.

Everything about this is different.

If you think that this is even close
to anything that I've ever felt before,

ever known,
then you couldn't be more wrong.

Jennifer, I love you.

I'm in love with you,
and I want to share my life with you.

You're in love with the idea of it all
and you're being impulsive.

- And I don't like it.
- I'm being instinctive!

Do you have any idea
what you're asking of me?

My family, my friends,
they would disown me.

All the more reason to leave them behind.

- So easy for you.
- Easy?

Watching you return home
every night to a man who--

A man who what?

I think it's entirely possible that
you might be wasted in the life you're in.

Boot, it's true. I was brought up
to do what is expected of me

rather than what might make me happy.

I'm afraid to love you.

I'm afraid that if I let myself go,
I'd love you so much it would consume me.

And I fear that once I cease to be
a novelty, you might tire of me.

You have to understand
that if I were to leave with you,

it's not just my family
and my security I would lose.

It's my very peace of mind.

And it's a risk I don't think
I'm strong enough to take.

I hope you understand. Yours always, J.

My dearest and only love,

I know you're frightened,

but believe me when I say
I've known nothing like this before

and can assure you
that I never will again.

It's with that certainty that
I've decided to make a bold decision.

I'm going to take the job in New York.

I'll be on platform two,
Marylebone, Friday at 7:15 p.m.

Come with me, darling.

Spare him a life half-lived,
a marriage of convenience.

More importantly, spare yourself.

Seize this thing
that is true and real and infinite.

Yes, it is scary,
but I believe living a lie is worse.

A call from Mr. Stirling's
office. He says to go ahead without him.

We could be happy. So happy.

Know that you hold my hopes,
my heart in your hands. Your Boot.

Taxi!

Make way!

-Felipe, you think we'll make it in time?
-I think so.

Just barely.

Coming through!

Felipe, please hurry.

All aboard!

"Our famous heavyweight
corduroy trousers,

rubber shirt-grip waistband,
elastic side straps,

three roomy pockets…"

- It's cool if you wanna get that.
- No.

"Uh, available in brown,
fawn, bottle green, and gray."

"Authentic detailing
and rugged tailoring."

Very fine indeed.

Ah. "Mega-Mash."

- "Smashingly smooth, fluffy, flavorsome."
- Ellie.

-I think I found one.
-Oh my God!

Read it out!

"Dearest J,

I've spent my life avoiding complication,
especially the romantic kind."

"Having met you, I now realize that what
I was doing wasn't really living at all."

"I know it's hard for you to hear that
I love you, but I have to say the words."

"They're in my head from the moment
I wake until I fall asleep again,

and if I can't say them,
I'll write them to you again and again."

"I love you, dear Jenny. Your B."

Shit.

We should just check out the PO box
the other letters were sent to

and see if it still exists.

Yes!

What are you doing?

Rory's phone. Ellie speaking.

Uh… we work together.
I'm afraid I made him stay late.

Uh…

No. No, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm… I'm sorry.

Okay. Okay. See you.

Why didn't you tell me it's your birthday?

I… I would rather be doing this.

Right. Get your stuff together.

So why would you invite
your ex to your birthday party?

I didn't. I had no idea
she was gonna be here.

Well, who invited her, then?

She's my sister's friend, and
I'm not talking to any of them tonight.

- So what happened with you guys?
- She was religious.

But I guess when we met,
she was only a bit religious.

And as the relationship
went on, she was like,

"Actually, the fact you don't believe
in God is a deal breaker for me."

But, in the end, she married this guy.

You know. You win some, you lose some.

What about you?

-You don't wanna know about me.
-You couldn't be more wrong.

Well, I was with someone for a while.

Define a while.

Eight years.
And he really wanted kids, but I didn't.

So… so we broke up.

I'm sorry.

That isn't even the end. Then we got
back together and then broke up again.

Then there was this whole awful
smorgasbord of haphazard shagging.

And then finally, he proposed.

Uh, we were on holiday with about
a dozen of our nearest and dearest.

Oh gosh.

Yep.

I mean, it wasn't even
that I didn't love him. I just…

I just wasn't sure
that I loved him enough.

Maybe I do want kids. I don't know.

But pretty much knew for sure
I didn't want them with him.

Well, that sounds like
a really shit breakup. I'm sorry.

And that is why people shouldn't talk
about themselves, 'cause it's depressing.

Yeah, it's really depressing.

I think it might be time
for your birthday dance.

My birthday dance?

Yes. Your birthday dance.

♪ And I'm gonna tell each and every one
Of you to give me some assistance now ♪

♪ Ain't love good
Ain't love proud ♪

♪ Ain't love good
Ain't love proud ♪

♪ Let me hear the music ♪

♪ All right
All right ♪

♪ Well, listen, child ♪

♪ Don't ya know it's a big, bright world
When a guy meets a girl ♪

♪ Don't ya know if the girl is real
Well then it's got to be so sweet ♪

♪ Don't ya know it's a good, good feeling
That sends your heart a-reelin' ♪

♪ Everybody now clap your hands, children
Stomp them feet ♪

Oh, cool flat.

Yeah, this is, uh… this is me.

It's nice! Oh your cat!

Diesel.

Hi, Diesel.

Refreshment?

Yeah. Uh…
maybe, actually, water.

Yeah.

Thanks.

So many records.

It's kinda hobby of mine.

Hello.

♪ Hello Marc
Long time no see ♪

♪ I bet you don't remember me… ♪

So these, um…

these ladies…

they're all your sisters, right?

Uh, no, uh,
I'm a serial bigamist, actually.

Oh.

Yeah. Shucks, I thought so.

♪ By the way, have you seen him lately? ♪

♪ Could you tell me how is he? ♪

♪ I haven't seen him for so long ♪

♪ Don't think of him when I'm alone ♪

♪ Time flies so fast doing this alone ♪

♪ It was two years the other night
And I forgot ♪

Oh shit.

Hi. Um…

-I was wondering--
-Sorry, you're gonna have to speak up.

Oh, um, how do I find out
who owns one of these PO boxes?

You want to open a PO box?

No, no, I want to find out
who owns one of them.

Are you the owner of the box?

No, I… I want to find out who owns
one of them so I can write to them.

I mean, I want to find out
if they still own it,

if you, uh… if you see what I'm saying.

You've obviously not heard of that
little thing called "data protection."

You know what, um?

Don't worry about it.
I will, uh… I'll figure something out.

Dear J,

this might sound strange, but I found
some letters that may belong to you,

addressed to JS, postmark 1965.

They appear to be of sentimental value.

If you could bare to tell me,
I'd love to know the story

behind them and Mr. Boot.

With all best wishes, Ellie Haworth.

"Dear Miss Haworth, I do not wish
to speak to you regarding the events

of the period
outlined to me in your letter,

and as such will be unable to assist you
any further with your investigation."

"Sincerely, Jennifer Stirling."

Okay, I'll see you.

-Bye.
-Bye.

Hello?

Is that… is that Mrs. Stirling?

Speaking.

Hello, hi. I'm, um… I'm Ellie Haworth
from The London Chronicle.

I… I wrote to you regarding a series
of letters that myself and my colleague--

Yes, yes, and I have responded
via the enclosed address.

Yes, um…

I… I just…

Look, um, if now is inconvenient,
I'm… I'm more than happy--

I'm sorry,
but as I said in my letter,

what happened between myself
and Mr. O'Hare is a private matter.

Yes, of course,
and I'm… I'm very sorry for intruding.

Um. I just wanted
at the very least to return--

Hello?

Hello?

Shit.

Mrs. Stirling, lovely to see you again.
We've missed you.

Yes, it's… it's lovely to see you too.

I wouldn't suppose you have a spare key?
I seemed to have left mine at home.

Certainly, ma'am,
but PO box 13 is no longer in service.

I'm sorry?

As per Mr. Stirling's request,
it's been closed for the last month.

Well, reopen it now. Please.

Certainly, ma'am.

Mrs. Cordoza, I need the keys
to my husband's study.

I'm afraid this is an instruction
and not a request.

Of course.

Thank you.

My dearest and only love,

I know you're frightened,

but believe me when I say
I've known nothing like this before

and can assure you I never will again.

I'll be on platform two, Marylebone, 7:15.

Seize this thing
that is true and real and infinite.

More importantly, spare yourself.

Living a lie is worse.

I'll never be satisfied
with just a part of you.

- It's my very peace of mind.
- Come with me, darling.

- We could be happy. So happy.
- I would love you so much.

Know that you hold my hopes,
my heart in your hands.

- Yours always, J.
- Your Boot.

What are you doing with this?

Larry, why have you been tampering
with my mail?

They, um…

They found it on you…
the day of the accident.

I'm guessing you know who wrote it.

Yes.

Yes, his name is Anthony O'Hare.

Was.

A journalist.

I introduced you.

The two of you, it seems,
were engaged in some kind of…

Jenny, he was killed.

Wait.

- He was beside you in the car.
- No.

No.

The man beside me
in the car was named Felipe.

The driver was Felipe, but the man in the
passenger seat was a Mr. Anthony O'Hare.

And when you woke
from your accident, I made a decision.

I was trying to protect you.

-From what?
-The truth.

I didn't want you
to have to bear the guilt.

Holy shit.

Anthony worked at The Chronicle.

Yes.

- Hello?
- Ellie Haworth?

- Uh-huh.
- This is Anthony O'Hare.

Oh. Um. Hi!

Um.

I believe you
wish to speak with me.

Yes.

Uh, hello, Mr. O'Hare.

So, how did you stumble on my story?

Well, initially, I was just…

I was just following an instinct, and…

well, then I thought
there might be a feature in it.

And then the more I read,

the more I started to feel…

I just… I found them incredibly moving.

So, did she meet you?

D-- Did you go to New York together?

No.

Mrs. Stirling
did not accompany me to New York.

And was that the last-- I… I mean…

Did you…

Did you ever see each other again?

♪ Christmas is here
Bringing good cheer ♪

♪ To young and old
Meek and the bold ♪

♪ Ding-dong, ding-dong
That is the song ♪

♪ With joyful ring
All caroling ♪

♪ One seems to hear
Words of good cheer ♪

♪ From everywhere
Filling the air ♪

♪ Oh, how they pound
Raising their sound ♪

♪ O'er hill and dale
Telling their tale ♪

♪ Gaily they ring
While people sing songs of good cheer ♪

♪ Christmas is here
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas ♪

♪ Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas ♪

♪ On, on they send
On without end ♪

♪ Their joyful tone
To every home… ♪

Jennifer.

♪ Throw cares away
Christmas is here ♪

Jennifer.

♪ To young and old
Meek and the bold ♪

♪ Ding-dong, ding-dong
That is the song ♪

Am I really that much
of a fright after all these years?

♪ Words of good cheer
From everywhere ♪

♪ Filling the air
Oh, how they pound… ♪

- Can we go somewhere?
- Of course.

♪ Gaily they ring
While people sing songs of good cheer ♪

♪ Christmas is here
Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas ♪

♪ Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas ♪

♪ On, on they send
On without end ♪

♪ Their joyful tone
To every home ♪

What must you have thought of me?

Well, I assumed you to be a loyal wife.

And I returned to my work.

New York?

It's been my home for the past

four years.

I was on my way…

to meet you.

There was a crash.

I was left unconscious.

I couldn't remember anything.

Until I saw you tonight.

I had found your letters,
but I was told you…

I was misled. I thought that I'd lost you.

Misplaced, perhaps.

But certainly not lost.

Boot?

Yes, dear Jennifer.

Would you kiss me, please?

Come back with me.

I can't lose you again.

Too many things have changed.

I'm still in love with you.

Can you please help me?

I have a daughter.

What's her name?

Esme.

She's two.

Bring her.

Hmm?

I can't.

Forgive me.

I'll wait.

Tell me to wait for you, and I will.

I love you.

I always have.

I'm so sorry.

So that was the last
you saw of each other?

No more letters?

No more letters.

Do you have them with you?

Yes. The… the letters, yes.

Here.

What if I could put
the two of you in touch?

No.

I chose to respect
Jennifer's decision all those years ago.

It seems only right to me
I continue to do so.

I wonder if these ought
to be returned to Mrs. Sterling.

I already tried.

Well, you're a journalist.

Try again.

Can I help you?

Um.

Mrs. Stirling?

Yes.

Well, I'm, um… I'm Ellie.
Ellie Haworth from the, uh…

Um, look, I'm… I'm… I'm just…
I'm not trying to… I just…

I met with Mr. O'Hare, with Anthony,

and, um, he wanted me to give you these.

He wants you to have them,
and it is his express wish.

What did you two discuss?

Well, uh, you.

Mostly.

He… he told me what happened.

In the end, you… you chose your family.

♪ Johnny boy, my friend
Stop them again ♪

♪ For a lonely girl
In the world ♪

♪ Of the stone buildings
That would turn brown ♪

♪ If they were born ♪

♪ In the town
Where the trees are grown ♪

♪ Johnny boy
I'm alone ♪

♪ Please take me home ♪

What's all this, then?

♪ Johnny boy, my friend
Please hold my hand ♪

♪ In the middle of the--♪

You lied to me.

You told me he was dead.

Why?

For the sake of our marriage.

By allowing me to believe
that I'd killed him?

I know that I betrayed you, Lawrence.

I live with it every day.

And I have spent
the last four years of my life…

trying to be a better wife for you.

But I remember, Larry,
I remember everything.

And the truth is, you and I were broken
long before Anthony came into my life.

- Jennifer.
- Don't touch me.

- Jenny, listen--
-No, you listen to me now!

The only reason I am still here
is because of our daughter.

From this day forward,
I am your wife in name only.

And if you so much as attempt
to treat me otherwise,

I will take our daughter,
and I will leave.

Now if you think the courts will side with
an adulteress, then you're delusional.

And if you try to leave,
if you try to take my child,

I will destroy you,

and you'll never see her again.
Do you understand?

Hi, darling.

Hi, baby.

We're gonna go on an adventure, okay?

Hello, I'm looking for Mr. Anthony O'Hare.
He's in room 268.

Mr. O'Hare
is no longer staying with us here.

When did he leave?

Yesterday.

Thank you.

Ma'am? Stop for a second.

- Anthony?
- Excuse me. Ma'am?

What's going on in here?

I've been trying to explain.

- Mary Ellen?
- Anthony?

I'm… I'm looking for Anthony O'Hare.
I need to know where he is, please.

I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this,
but Anthony handed in his notice.

He resigned this morning.

-Did he leave a forwarding address?
-I'm sorry to say he did not.

Perhaps you could see to it
that he gets these.

If you hear from Anthony again,
please tell him I was looking for him.

So then you…
you went back to your husband?

I just couldn't risk losing her.

And I did eventually leave him,

when I knew for certain
that the law would support my decision.

What about Mr. O'Hare?

Did you try getting in touch
with him once… once you'd left?

I would scour the papers
every day looking for his name.

Nothing. And eventually,
I stopped buying the paper.

It felt to me
as though he didn't want to be found.

But what about now?

You know, he doesn't know that
you tried to go after him. He has no idea.

Probably for the best. We had our chance.

Yes, but what…
what if you could have another chance?

Our heart can only take so much,

and I fear, at my age,
I've reached my limit.

The past can be intoxicating.
It can draw you in,

create the illusion
that things were better, you were happier,

or experiences were richer back then.

It can also debilitate you,

leaving you stuck in your memories
of pain, heartbreak, and disappointment,

holding you back from even attempting
another shot at happiness.

They say if we don't learn from past
mistakes, we're bound to repeat them.

But can we also learn
to let go of the past,

learn to forge ahead,
keeping the knowledge close

but not letting it overtake
our ability to try again, to feel again?

Ellie, it's fantastic.

Okay. Um…

Really good work here.

Well, that's great.
I… I appreciate that.

I'll be back later.

- Hello?
- Hi, it's, uh… it's Ellie.

Um, how's it going?

Yeah, I'm fine. You?

Uh, pretty good.

No, that's… that's…
that's not actually true.

I don't know why I left
without saying goodbye,

and I don't know why I didn't reply
to any of your messages. That's, uh…

That's a really shitty thing, and, I mean,
if you wanted to message me again,

you have my word you'll get a reply.

But I get there might be a ton of reasons
why you don't wanna speak to me

or write to me or hang out with me.

And, in truth, I'm kinda worried you might
think I'm a pretty heinous individual

if you get to know me, but…

But at this point,

I don't think being afraid to try
is a good enough reason for anything.

And I…

I think you're fucking tip-top, Rory.

And I'd…

I'd really love to see you again.

I hope you don't mind
me saying that.

Look, where… where are you?

I'm… I'm… I'm outside.

Sorry?

I'm outside your flat.

Oh my God. That's so creepy.

Yeah, well, I was aiming for industrious
but I… um, I take your point.

Okay, okay, wait there. Just keep talking.

I'm gonna come down. Keep talking.

I'm so sor--

I found them. Both of them.

I went to see them.

-You're kidding.
-No.

Shit. What did they say?

-She tried everything.
-He still doesn't know she went after him?

-No, he's got no idea.
-So you have to tell him.

I know! I want to,
but they don't wanna see each other.

If that was true, then why keep
the PO box open the whole time?

That doesn't make any sense.

That is a really good point.

She really came after me?

She said that to you?

Dear J,

please forgive this brief intrusion, but

as I'm sure you are aware,

our very separate lives have thankfully,

at least for this old man,

once again intercepted.

In the intervening years,

I've thought of you
with a constancy I hesitate to now admit.

Missing you.

So I shall venture one last time,

with some trepidation.

Postman's Park,

Friday,

2:00 p.m.

Yours respectfully,

B.

Oh, she's not coming.

At least we tried.

I'll go and get him.

How about we close our eyes?

A letter.

An invitation…

to come away.

To start again.

Marylebone.

Waiting.

I am starting to worry now.

But there's really no need.

Because I'm right here.

Right on time.

♪ Our love, yeah ♪

♪ Is slowly going on the rocks now ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Tell me, tell me, baby
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
Our love, yeah ♪

♪ Is in double jeopardy
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Show me, show me, sugar pie
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ You know I try to keep you satisfied ♪

♪ But you just won't comprehend ♪

♪ And if you keep on doin'
Doin' what you're doin '♪

♪ You know our love will surely end ♪

♪ Don't you know that our love, yeah ♪

♪ Is slowly going on the rocks now ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Tell me, tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Oh, tell me
Tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Oh, tell me
Tell me, baby ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Oh, tell me
Come on and show me ♪

♪ What'cha gonna do 'bout it
What'cha gonna do 'bout it ♪

♪ Tried to withdraw a guilty plea ♪

♪ Damn!
You ain't gonna pin this one on me ♪

♪ One thing's for sure
I'm not sleeping here tonight ♪

♪ And I'm not interested
In what you think is bad ♪

♪ But I get so lonely
I can't relate to anyone ♪

♪ And my heart is crying out
I'm on my knees ♪

♪ I'm begging you please
Have mercy on me ♪

♪ I'm not gonna see you anymore♪

♪ 'Cause you're not strong enough ♪

♪ And you're not smart enough
You're not cool enough ♪

♪ Looking out the window of the cafe
There's a boy with cherry-colored lips ♪

♪ More like
A cherry-flavored stomachache ♪

♪ Like it's only a character in my mind ♪

♪ And my heart is crying out
I'm on my knees ♪

♪ I'm begging you please
Have mercy on me ♪