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1
00:00:49,660 --> 00:00:52,580
I need some support...
2
00:00:53,180 --> 00:00:56,300
...so that I don't slip.
3
00:01:09,380 --> 00:01:12,220
Hey, What happened?
4
00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:20,440
You got so scared as if you
haven't seen cleavage before?
5
00:01:21,380 --> 00:01:23,980
No, no. Nothing like that.
6
00:01:26,980 --> 00:01:30,260
That means you have seen it.
7
00:01:35,740 --> 00:01:37,300
Are you coming to have tea?
8
00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:39,100
Yes.
9
00:01:49,340 --> 00:01:52,220
I'm going to play our favourite song.
10
00:01:52,340 --> 00:01:53,540
You guys know it.
11
00:01:53,940 --> 00:02:02,620
'Jeans, booze, fag, and love.'
12
00:02:02,900 --> 00:02:05,260
'Jeans, booze, fag, and love.'
13
00:02:05,340 --> 00:02:07,820
'Canteen, booze, fag, and love.'
14
00:02:07,900 --> 00:02:12,100
'Friend, booze, fag, and love.'
15
00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:16,910
'And moment.'
16
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:26,660
- Please sing 'moment' once again.
- Hey, am I stupid or what?
17
00:02:26,740 --> 00:02:29,380
- What nonsense is this?
- She always talks nonsense.
18
00:02:29,460 --> 00:02:30,190
What is her problem?
19
00:02:30,210 --> 00:02:32,170
Dude, sing 'Gulabi
Aankhein' (pink eyes) for me.
20
00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:33,460
How about a pink dick?
21
00:02:34,250 --> 00:02:35,520
Get that bastard out of here.
22
00:02:35,620 --> 00:02:36,930
Listen dude, Please sing 'Sun Raha Hai
tu, Ro Raha Hu Main'
23
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:37,610
'Wonderwall, Wonderwall.'
24
00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:39,140
- 'Paani Da Rang.'
- Please sing 'Wonderwall.'
25
00:02:39,220 --> 00:02:41,700
How about 'Musu Musu Haasi' song?
26
00:02:42,100 --> 00:02:44,420
May I know which is song is this?
27
00:02:44,780 --> 00:02:50,100
There's this song 'Musu
Musu Haasi deu malai lai'
28
00:02:50,180 --> 00:02:52,740
No, no, no.
29
00:02:52,820 --> 00:02:54,540
You guys hear me every day.
30
00:02:54,620 --> 00:02:56,740
But this guy is from another hostel.
So let's do it for him.
31
00:02:56,820 --> 00:03:00,500
- Okay.
- Guys, I'm from this hostel.
32
00:03:01,860 --> 00:03:04,540
Leo, remember last night you came
over to Chirag's room.
33
00:03:05,020 --> 00:03:08,500
To collect notes.
I'm his roomie. Ankit Pandey.
34
00:03:08,780 --> 00:03:10,180
But you are Chirag's roommate, right?
35
00:03:10,260 --> 00:03:12,460
He's talking about Chirag
from Computer Science.
36
00:03:12,570 --> 00:03:14,130
But his roommate is Jaat.
37
00:03:14,220 --> 00:03:16,620
- Yeah.
- God knows where do these guys come from?
38
00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:18,360
I've never seen him before.
39
00:03:20,980 --> 00:03:22,590
'Musu'
40
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:25,340
'Musu'
41
00:03:26,110 --> 00:03:27,850
'Haasi'
42
00:03:28,580 --> 00:03:30,390
'Deu'
43
00:03:30,740 --> 00:03:33,020
'Malai Lai'
44
00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:35,450
Come on, freshers. Clear the place.
45
00:03:35,540 --> 00:03:37,220
We're going to have a
meeting to discuss Hostel Day's theme.
46
00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:38,260
Come on.
47
00:03:38,580 --> 00:03:39,980
- Bravo.
- What are you staring at?
48
00:03:40,060 --> 00:03:41,100
- Get lost.
- Not you, Leo. You need to be here.
49
00:03:41,180 --> 00:03:42,580
He'll make us strip again.
50
00:03:43,470 --> 00:03:44,140
Leo?
51
00:03:44,220 --> 00:03:45,580
Let's get out of here.
52
00:03:45,660 --> 00:03:46,900
He's a creative guy.
53
00:03:46,980 --> 00:03:48,860
He dances really well,
and is also a musician.
54
00:03:49,100 --> 00:03:51,190
The song 'Keywords' was sung by him.
55
00:03:53,140 --> 00:03:54,980
'Jeans, booze, fag, and love.'
You wrote this.
56
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,220
'And moment.'
57
00:03:56,740 --> 00:03:58,380
Fuck! Nice.
58
00:03:58,460 --> 00:03:59,540
Thank you, sir.
59
00:04:00,460 --> 00:04:01,820
I hope you won't leak the theme, will you?
60
00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:03,260
Not at all, sir.
61
00:04:04,020 --> 00:04:05,540
- Nice.
- Join the quorum.
62
00:04:05,620 --> 00:04:06,820
Nice.
63
00:04:06,900 --> 00:04:09,140
Now, they will learn a lesson.
64
00:04:09,220 --> 00:04:10,460
Thanks.
65
00:04:20,980 --> 00:04:22,500
Which hostel was he from?
66
00:04:26,980 --> 00:04:33,190
You got so scared as if you
haven't seen cleavage before?
67
00:04:33,860 --> 00:04:34,860
No, no.
68
00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:40,380
Watching films is a bad thing.
69
00:04:40,740 --> 00:04:42,060
You shouldn't.
70
00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:44,900
Even if it's a porn or scripted.
71
00:04:45,180 --> 00:04:47,380
Because both set wrong expectations.
72
00:04:47,700 --> 00:04:49,020
Like the way happened to him.
73
00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:51,730
Like every other kid,
after watching 'Rang De Basanti'
74
00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:53,840
even he thought he'll become
'DJ' once he enters college.
75
00:04:53,930 --> 00:04:57,050
But the truth is the chances
of becoming 'DJ' are as scarce...
76
00:04:57,140 --> 00:05:00,140
...as finding a MILF
aunty in your neighbourhood.
77
00:05:00,380 --> 00:05:02,700
Tending to 0.
78
00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:05,700
And it's not that no one can
become famous in college.
79
00:05:06,260 --> 00:05:08,700
Some of them have cult status.
80
00:05:08,980 --> 00:05:10,180
Like Rampuri.
81
00:05:10,260 --> 00:05:12,140
He don't shoot on counter strike.
82
00:05:12,220 --> 00:05:13,620
He always stab with knife.
83
00:05:13,700 --> 00:05:14,740
Or Jatayu.
84
00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:19,000
He is not a hostel's metal fan. It's him.
85
00:05:19,500 --> 00:05:22,020
And some get a fame
by social services.
86
00:05:22,220 --> 00:05:23,300
Like Dalle.
87
00:05:23,380 --> 00:05:26,500
He arrange the passes of
Sophia college fashion show.
88
00:05:26,740 --> 00:05:28,020
Or Mukhiya.
89
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:31,480
With the help of IAS uncle, he makes
people passports on immediate basis.
90
00:05:31,620 --> 00:05:33,460
But not everyone gets fame.
91
00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:37,490
Problem is that they're all similar
92
00:05:38,620 --> 00:05:41,020
And everyone wants to
make their own identity.
93
00:05:41,460 --> 00:05:42,700
But how's that possible?
94
00:05:43,250 --> 00:05:45,420
We have problems with engineers.
95
00:05:45,710 --> 00:05:50,110
Atleast they can prove their identity.
But can't create it.
96
00:05:54,580 --> 00:05:59,660
"I am on my way."
97
00:05:59,740 --> 00:06:06,020
"Yes, I am on my way."
98
00:06:14,140 --> 00:06:16,420
Everybody arrives here with a
roll number.
99
00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:19,180
But whoever leaves
with a nickname...
100
00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:23,340
...will be called as a master of his
destiny or whatever his nickname is.
101
00:06:23,860 --> 00:06:26,140
The matter is clear.
102
00:06:26,540 --> 00:06:29,700
Every boy of the
wing should be famous.
103
00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:32,540
Everyone should have
their own identity.
104
00:06:32,620 --> 00:06:34,140
Aura, personality.
105
00:06:34,250 --> 00:06:35,570
Only then your dream of seeing me...
106
00:06:35,620 --> 00:06:38,020
...as the hostel
President will be fulfilled.
107
00:06:38,300 --> 00:06:39,940
Our dream?
108
00:06:40,260 --> 00:06:43,020
But only the final year students
can become the President, right?
109
00:06:43,100 --> 00:06:45,260
- Correct.
- But there's still time for that.
110
00:06:45,340 --> 00:06:46,460
Why did you wake us up so early?
111
00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:48,430
- Let's go.
- Chirag.
112
00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:51,120
The guy for whom the strongest
team campaigns, in the
113
00:06:51,140 --> 00:06:52,830
fourth year
becomes the President.
114
00:06:52,940 --> 00:06:54,740
A strong team is made up of stud lads.
115
00:06:54,820 --> 00:06:56,460
Who're not only famous in the campus...
116
00:06:56,540 --> 00:06:57,780
but also influence voting.
117
00:06:57,860 --> 00:06:59,460
And you assholes!
118
00:06:59,930 --> 00:07:02,370
Even your batchmates are not aware
about your existence. Do they?
119
00:07:02,460 --> 00:07:04,820
Your Lordship! Do they know you?
120
00:07:06,140 --> 00:07:08,460
Of course, Jhantoo.
Everyone knows him.
121
00:07:08,550 --> 00:07:09,990
Everyone knows him.
122
00:07:10,060 --> 00:07:12,580
We'll campaign in such a way...
123
00:07:12,660 --> 00:07:14,340
...that even Chautala will feel shy.
124
00:07:14,920 --> 00:07:16,900
I'm not talking about you, my son.
125
00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:18,800
You're my Classic Milds.
126
00:07:19,180 --> 00:07:20,580
You guys should learn from him.
127
00:07:20,660 --> 00:07:22,460
This boy's already Mister Fresher.
128
00:07:22,540 --> 00:07:24,340
Through him I'll atleast get 55
votes from girls hostel.
129
00:07:24,420 --> 00:07:27,100
If he wanted,
he could have taken it lightly. But no.
130
00:07:27,660 --> 00:07:29,660
He's a part of all sports
teams except chess.
131
00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:32,420
And you guys are just jerking off.
132
00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:34,260
Who's jerking off? I don't know.
133
00:07:34,340 --> 00:07:36,370
Son, if you don't create your own
identity in college...
134
00:07:36,450 --> 00:07:38,610
...then you'll always be like
the third wheel, potato in pilaf...
135
00:07:38,700 --> 00:07:40,580
..a cameraman filming a threesome.
136
00:07:40,780 --> 00:07:44,020
Unsatisfied. Unknown. Disposable.
137
00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:48,900
So Jhantoo sir, you tell me
how should I make my place in this crowd.
138
00:07:49,220 --> 00:07:51,820
There's only one way to
be in the limelight.
139
00:07:54,540 --> 00:07:55,820
Clubs.
140
00:07:57,780 --> 00:07:58,750
Note it down.
141
00:07:59,460 --> 00:08:00,980
I have a soft copy as well.
142
00:08:08,820 --> 00:08:12,300
If you head any
of the clubs in your third year...
143
00:08:12,540 --> 00:08:14,900
...then all your juniors
will treat you like a stud.
144
00:08:14,980 --> 00:08:15,900
They'll revere you.
145
00:08:15,980 --> 00:08:18,700
Not only your posts,
they'll like your comments as well.
146
00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:20,460
This meeting was called...
147
00:08:20,540 --> 00:08:22,460
...because all the club
selections are starting from tomorrow.
148
00:08:22,490 --> 00:08:28,290
So go and join atleast one of them
and work hard for the next two years.
149
00:08:28,900 --> 00:08:30,020
Two years?
150
00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:32,180
But won't that affect
our studies, Jhantoo sir?
151
00:08:32,260 --> 00:08:33,940
As if you'll go to Stanford.
You asshole.
152
00:08:34,020 --> 00:08:37,820
Yes. MS from Stanford, Ph.D. from MIT
and Post-graduation from Princeton.
153
00:08:37,900 --> 00:08:39,740
Then I will go to ISRO
and work on 'Shukrayan.'
154
00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:41,700
It will be cheaper than 'Mangalyan.'
155
00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:43,060
Really?
156
00:08:43,260 --> 00:08:44,980
And what will you write in the
extracurricular section of your resume?
157
00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:47,060
That you scrub your ass with books? Huh?
158
00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:48,780
If you don't participate
in extra-curricular activities...
159
00:08:48,860 --> 00:08:50,520
then this boring personality's visa
will get rejected...
160
00:08:50,540 --> 00:08:52,090
...before scholarship.
161
00:08:52,260 --> 00:08:53,220
Okay.
162
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:55,260
Is it important for higher studies?
163
00:08:55,340 --> 00:08:57,500
Yes. So is everyone motivated?
164
00:08:57,580 --> 00:08:58,860
Did you have fun?
165
00:08:58,940 --> 00:09:01,300
So go screw yourselves.
166
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,340
And give me some good
news in the next two days.
167
00:09:03,420 --> 00:09:07,180
And listen, don't waste your
time in the dance or music club.
168
00:09:07,260 --> 00:09:08,260
All those who were eligible...
169
00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:11,220
...have already been selected
by the fourth year students.
170
00:09:11,500 --> 00:09:12,740
Disperse.
171
00:09:13,140 --> 00:09:18,180
Jhantoo sir, if it is so important
for my dreams, then I'll definitely do it.
172
00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:19,740
I'll do everything.
173
00:09:19,900 --> 00:09:24,700
Is there any way I can manage cult status,
social service and club altogether?
174
00:09:25,700 --> 00:09:28,340
There's no such thing.
175
00:09:28,500 --> 00:09:30,260
How come there is nothing?
176
00:09:30,290 --> 00:09:32,970
If a cultured woman like me
has an affair...
177
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:35,300
...then it would be with
a popular guy, right?
178
00:09:35,500 --> 00:09:37,700
Your uncle is anyway an ordinary guy.
179
00:09:38,020 --> 00:09:40,580
And an extra-marital
affair like this...
180
00:09:40,660 --> 00:09:42,580
...won't be accepted
by the society either.
181
00:09:43,300 --> 00:09:45,820
If this is the case, then I will
become popular for you.
182
00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:48,300
Just being popular will not suffice.
183
00:09:49,940 --> 00:09:52,620
You'd need to do more than that.
184
00:09:55,860 --> 00:09:58,020
Calling yourself 'cooldude69'
will neither make
185
00:09:58,100 --> 00:10:01,350
you a cool dude,
nor will it get you into 69.
186
00:10:02,300 --> 00:10:03,540
Shall we, aunty?
187
00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:06,020
You are such a moron.
188
00:10:06,340 --> 00:10:08,780
Aunty, please don't do it.
189
00:10:08,860 --> 00:10:10,700
You're not my love, you're my addiction.
190
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:13,780
You know I can't sleep
at night without seeing your face?
191
00:10:14,060 --> 00:10:14,940
If you agree...
192
00:10:15,020 --> 00:10:17,700
...then I swear I won't even look at any
aunty be it local or foreigner.
193
00:10:17,860 --> 00:10:19,540
I'll do as you say.
194
00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:20,980
I'll do it wherever you say.
195
00:10:21,060 --> 00:10:23,420
I will even become popular.
Just say yes once.
196
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:25,740
Please, aunty. Please. Please.
197
00:10:26,300 --> 00:10:27,260
Promise?
198
00:10:27,660 --> 00:10:30,100
Promise. Promise. Promise. Promise.
199
00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:34,540
Okay, then.
Put on your clothes and be ready.
200
00:10:34,820 --> 00:10:35,820
Clothes?
201
00:10:35,890 --> 00:10:38,690
Why? You don't want to go to the club?
202
00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:40,820
Club?
203
00:10:40,980 --> 00:10:43,140
Hey, Ankit, don't you
want to go to the club?
204
00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:45,740
Wake up. Or else you'll be late.
205
00:10:47,740 --> 00:10:49,980
I have to go. And become a popular too.
206
00:10:51,700 --> 00:10:55,140
Listen. You take the technical ones,
and I'll take the cultural ones.
207
00:10:55,940 --> 00:10:57,100
Okay.
208
00:11:03,780 --> 00:11:06,420
In order to get selected
in the debating society...
209
00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:09,180
...the only thing one needs to do is...
210
00:11:10,130 --> 00:11:11,500
- Debate.
- I disagree.
211
00:11:11,580 --> 00:11:13,100
I second that.
212
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:16,060
Hello, sir. I'm Chirag Bansal.
213
00:11:16,140 --> 00:11:17,300
Computer Science.
214
00:11:17,380 --> 00:11:20,300
I want to join the
hacking club because...
215
00:11:22,020 --> 00:11:25,140
Last financial year
Sudama Bank website was hacked.
216
00:11:25,220 --> 00:11:26,740
Do you know who did it?
217
00:11:27,060 --> 00:11:28,420
No, sir.
218
00:11:28,660 --> 00:11:30,100
Nobody knows.
219
00:11:36,460 --> 00:11:43,540
So Ankit? Your topic is, 'I must
be selected for the debating society.'
220
00:11:44,020 --> 00:11:47,140
And you'll be speaking against the motion.
221
00:11:47,660 --> 00:11:49,900
Your time starts now.
222
00:11:50,020 --> 00:11:53,580
Every hacker's most useful
weapon is his anonymity.
223
00:11:54,620 --> 00:11:57,300
And you revealed your identity
when you came in here, you asshole.
224
00:11:58,340 --> 00:11:59,660
Not a good start.
225
00:11:59,860 --> 00:12:02,780
So, in a nutshell,
I've conclusively proven that I'm shy.
226
00:12:02,860 --> 00:12:04,620
...under-confident,
and a pathetic loser...
227
00:12:04,700 --> 00:12:07,660
...and hence I should never ever
be selected in the debating society.
228
00:12:07,740 --> 00:12:08,820
Ever.
229
00:12:09,780 --> 00:12:11,660
In fact, I even stutt..er.
230
00:12:12,940 --> 00:12:13,940
Stutter.
231
00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:19,940
We both agree with you.
232
00:12:20,460 --> 00:12:21,500
Rejected.
233
00:12:22,030 --> 00:12:27,550
Sir, you mean, even if I hack something,
I won't be able to put it on my resume.
234
00:12:28,300 --> 00:12:32,300
Even if you hack Kangana's account
and send romantic e-mails to Hrithik.
235
00:12:32,580 --> 00:12:33,860
Not even then.
236
00:13:06,940 --> 00:13:08,460
Women are mothers.
237
00:13:08,860 --> 00:13:11,380
Women are sisters, Women are Goddess.
238
00:13:11,940 --> 00:13:15,180
Who the hell are we to stop the women?
239
00:13:15,820 --> 00:13:18,940
Women have the talent...
240
00:13:19,680 --> 00:13:21,620
Stand only when
I give you the cue..
241
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:24,260
Not now. You stupid woman.
242
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:27,180
All the smart women have
joined the dance club.
243
00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:29,660
Women...
244
00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,860
Fast learner.
245
00:13:41,940 --> 00:13:43,860
You'll make a drone by
the end of the semester.
246
00:13:43,940 --> 00:13:45,900
You can even participate
in Robo Wars.
247
00:13:45,980 --> 00:13:48,780
Robo Wars? Sounds Unique.
248
00:13:49,460 --> 00:13:51,860
Bro, it's the biggest
robotics event in Asia.
249
00:13:51,940 --> 00:13:54,740
There are only 1300 participants
from India.
250
00:13:54,820 --> 00:13:57,580
And they all write
it on their CV proudly.
251
00:13:58,500 --> 00:14:00,420
- Everybody?
- Yes.
252
00:14:00,500 --> 00:14:02,300
Then what's unique about it.
253
00:14:11,300 --> 00:14:12,900
Is this the Nature's Club meet?
254
00:14:13,860 --> 00:14:15,140
Aren't you...
255
00:14:16,860 --> 00:14:19,260
Welcome to the All-team
meet of Nature's Club.
256
00:14:19,820 --> 00:14:20,900
I am not just it's President...
257
00:14:20,980 --> 00:14:22,060
...but the entire Nature Club in itself.
258
00:14:22,140 --> 00:14:23,260
And now, even you're a part of it.
259
00:14:24,180 --> 00:14:25,220
Shall we start the session?
260
00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:27,540
Yes. From where?
261
00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:29,140
From here.
262
00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:37,060
I got into all the atheletic clubs.
263
00:14:37,140 --> 00:14:39,980
Short put, long jump, all of them.
264
00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:41,660
- And you?
- Fine Arts.
265
00:14:41,740 --> 00:14:42,780
Very good.
266
00:14:42,940 --> 00:14:44,780
- Photography club.
- Amazing.
267
00:14:45,100 --> 00:14:47,420
No club. I am not in any of the clubs.
268
00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:50,700
I repeat I am not in any of the clubs.
269
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:57,740
And you?
270
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:01,540
Which club?
271
00:15:02,060 --> 00:15:03,260
Nature's club?
272
00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:04,840
Nature's club?
273
00:15:05,180 --> 00:15:08,900
Are you going to segregate waste
and keep them in different bins?
274
00:15:09,140 --> 00:15:11,220
Or build a biogas plant?
275
00:15:11,500 --> 00:15:15,020
You should've rather grown a ponytail
and joined Iskcon instead.
276
00:15:15,100 --> 00:15:17,860
You could've chanted Lord's
name all day and cleansed your sins.
277
00:15:17,940 --> 00:15:19,980
Plus you would've
got free food as well.
278
00:15:20,060 --> 00:15:21,980
You're completely useless.
279
00:15:22,060 --> 00:15:24,380
Nobody is useless,
at least he is trying.
280
00:15:24,460 --> 00:15:28,420
At least he doesn't have
bad habits like cooldude69.
281
00:15:29,300 --> 00:15:30,780
Do you know that cool dude?
282
00:15:30,860 --> 00:15:34,180
Had I known the bugger,
I would've gotten him rusticated.
283
00:15:35,940 --> 00:15:38,220
I just saw a nick on DC++
284
00:15:38,300 --> 00:15:40,140
- But everyone has seen that.
- No.
285
00:15:40,740 --> 00:15:44,260
I mean I've never
seen anything like that.
286
00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:47,620
Yes. I mean just heard it
from you for the first time.
287
00:15:47,700 --> 00:15:49,900
I mean what is it? 'Coolbird69?'
288
00:15:49,980 --> 00:15:52,300
'Cooldude69.'
289
00:15:52,620 --> 00:15:57,500
It's a nick on DC++
where you'll get lots of porn.
290
00:15:57,580 --> 00:15:58,780
How do you know?
291
00:15:58,860 --> 00:16:00,620
That's where everyone
downloads it from.
292
00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:02,220
Fuck.
293
00:16:02,460 --> 00:16:04,060
Yes, Ankit. Yes.
294
00:16:04,140 --> 00:16:06,720
Welcome to the dark
side of engineering.
295
00:16:09,340 --> 00:16:13,660
There are some porn dealers
amongst us like cooldude69...
296
00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:18,060
...who supply porn to innocent
students and mislead them.
297
00:16:18,130 --> 00:16:22,090
Innocent students watch
porn and some of them...
298
00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:24,700
...even get into premarital
masturbation.
299
00:16:24,780 --> 00:16:26,660
Yuck. Yuck.
300
00:16:26,740 --> 00:16:27,980
What yuck?
301
00:16:28,060 --> 00:16:31,220
This 'cooldude69' is the savior of LAN.
302
00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:33,780
- Have you seen 'Kavita aunty?'
- No.
303
00:16:34,220 --> 00:16:35,540
You should.
304
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,260
The entire campus is watching.
305
00:16:37,340 --> 00:16:38,820
Entire campus?
306
00:16:38,900 --> 00:16:41,660
Yes. This boy is a genius.
307
00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:44,100
He also puts a remark
in the file name.
308
00:16:44,180 --> 00:16:47,060
First Five minutes of this.
Boring story.
309
00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:49,700
The best scene at
15 minutes 20 seconds.
310
00:16:49,780 --> 00:16:52,300
This girl looks like Prachi from 11B.
311
00:16:52,380 --> 00:16:56,060
This guy has even given
a title to one of the movies.
312
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:59,660
Girl looks like Angelina Jolie.
Boy looks like Ravi Teja.
313
00:17:00,820 --> 00:17:02,580
- Yeah.
- What yeah?
314
00:17:02,660 --> 00:17:04,180
I don't look like him at all.
315
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:07,800
And I'll never let
any female to do that with me.
316
00:17:07,820 --> 00:17:09,820
That means you've also seen it.
317
00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:11,180
You saw it. Didn't you?
318
00:17:11,540 --> 00:17:13,780
Bro, what was that nick again?
319
00:17:13,860 --> 00:17:16,820
- 'cooldude69.' All in small letters.
- What? Are you crazy?
320
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:18,340
How can you say such things
publicly?
321
00:17:18,420 --> 00:17:20,580
Yes, he's right.
Don't encourage him like that.
322
00:17:20,660 --> 00:17:22,900
He's a bloody psychopath, rascal, idiot.
323
00:17:22,980 --> 00:17:26,700
At this age, they should make
us hold a pen in our hands... He is...
324
00:17:28,420 --> 00:17:30,940
I tell you, this is a genetic problem.
325
00:17:31,020 --> 00:17:33,140
His parents must be
bigger perverts than him.
326
00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:37,100
And I tell you I'll pray to
Lord Balaji that his parents...
327
00:17:37,180 --> 00:17:40,460
Wait a second, bro.
Wait a second. Wait a second.
328
00:17:41,090 --> 00:17:44,220
Maybe we're misunderstanding him.
329
00:17:44,570 --> 00:17:45,220
Right?
330
00:17:45,660 --> 00:17:48,060
Maybe he downloads it for himself.
331
00:17:48,140 --> 00:17:50,940
And also writes remarks for
his own reference. Who knows?
332
00:17:51,020 --> 00:17:52,980
Then he would've kept his folder private.
333
00:17:53,060 --> 00:17:54,460
Why is it public?
334
00:17:55,300 --> 00:18:01,900
Maybe he doesn't know.
I mean he's new.
335
00:18:02,140 --> 00:18:04,450
No one's that useless, okay.
336
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:10,500
I'll go get something to eat.
337
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:37,180
I heard you got into Nature's Club,
so I brought ice-cream!
338
00:18:37,300 --> 00:18:39,460
You're such a bad actor.
339
00:18:40,100 --> 00:18:44,500
I heard you got into Nature's Club,
so I brought ice-cream.
340
00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:50,820
Ankit. Don't worry
about the clubs so much.
341
00:18:51,630 --> 00:18:53,510
The selections will
continue tomorrow as well.
342
00:18:53,580 --> 00:18:56,340
I am not worried about
getting selected in clubs,
343
00:18:56,660 --> 00:19:00,660
But a sense of belonging.
344
00:19:01,580 --> 00:19:03,300
If I get selected in any
of the random clubs...
345
00:19:03,380 --> 00:19:05,140
...that won't make
me a part of this hostel.
346
00:19:05,220 --> 00:19:06,660
What are you talking about?
347
00:19:06,740 --> 00:19:08,300
Even I am not in any of the clubs.
348
00:19:08,380 --> 00:19:10,260
But that doesn't mean I'm
not a part of the hostel?
349
00:19:10,340 --> 00:19:12,780
You are. You're definitely
are a part of it.
350
00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:14,780
And that's the point.
351
00:19:15,580 --> 00:19:19,100
You, Jaat, Jhantoo,
Leo and that Ravi Teja...
352
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:21,940
In fact, they know Rakhi as well.
353
00:19:23,620 --> 00:19:27,020
And even if I manage to become a part of
any club, I'll still remain unknown.
354
00:19:28,180 --> 00:19:30,580
If I were to take my bags and leave...
355
00:19:32,060 --> 00:19:34,090
...nobody will even notice.
356
00:19:35,420 --> 00:19:39,300
Even a pregnant lady's baby
bump is seen in the fourth month.
357
00:19:39,380 --> 00:19:41,340
And it's not even been 2
months since you've joined.
358
00:19:41,420 --> 00:19:44,940
- Soon everyone will know you.
- How?
359
00:19:46,660 --> 00:19:48,840
This is not a classroom of 40 kids.
360
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,420
It's a campus of 1500 students.
361
00:19:56,540 --> 00:20:00,300
I'll raise my kid to be
a really cool person.
362
00:20:00,380 --> 00:20:02,340
I'll even teach him to play guitar.
363
00:20:04,420 --> 00:20:06,730
I'm an ordinary
person like him.
364
00:20:08,260 --> 00:20:10,380
But my child won't be.
365
00:20:11,380 --> 00:20:13,260
Who is he?
366
00:20:14,620 --> 00:20:17,100
This is my photograph from 7th grade.
367
00:20:17,180 --> 00:20:18,980
I found it on FB.
368
00:20:19,820 --> 00:20:22,860
And nobody tagged this poor kid.
369
00:20:23,860 --> 00:20:27,020
I mean even the grumpy principal
was tagged, but not this boy.
370
00:20:27,900 --> 00:20:29,860
I thought I'll tag him.
371
00:20:31,620 --> 00:20:34,100
But I couldn't remember his name.
372
00:20:39,220 --> 00:20:41,820
That's going to be my fate as well.
373
00:20:43,300 --> 00:20:46,340
I'll only leave this college with a degree.
374
00:20:47,860 --> 00:20:49,420
Not memories.
375
00:20:58,340 --> 00:21:03,700
Gymkhana President, 2003.
Manoj Mishra, aka Bhosad.
376
00:21:03,900 --> 00:21:05,020
He used to say...
377
00:21:05,340 --> 00:21:09,460
...those who don't have an identity
in college, always feel lonely.
378
00:21:09,540 --> 00:21:11,620
'Adopted Child Syndrome.'
379
00:21:12,140 --> 00:21:16,140
Years after graduating from college,
when these students chat on whatsapp groups
380
00:21:16,380 --> 00:21:20,220
...others wonder
'who's this asshole?'
381
00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:23,700
And so...be it good or bad...
382
00:21:24,580 --> 00:21:28,580
...you need to have
an identity in college.
383
00:21:30,420 --> 00:21:32,500
Hey, man! Make an entry first.
384
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:39,980
So, for every epsilon...
385
00:21:40,060 --> 00:21:41,260
This epsilon.
386
00:21:41,340 --> 00:21:43,060
For every epsilon,
you've to find an N.
387
00:21:43,140 --> 00:21:44,660
Once you find it...
388
00:21:44,740 --> 00:21:46,260
...for every epsilon...
the problem is solved.
389
00:21:46,340 --> 00:21:49,620
I mean to say..take
the epsilon and find the N.
390
00:21:49,700 --> 00:21:51,980
And your question will be solved.
I promise you.
391
00:21:53,460 --> 00:21:54,700
What is this?
392
00:21:55,220 --> 00:21:57,900
Good that you finally asked, sir.
393
00:21:59,980 --> 00:22:02,220
Hi, I am Chirag Bansal.
394
00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:08,380
Founder, CEO, CTO,
CFO and everything C of Wiki Lectures.
395
00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:10,980
- What lecture?
- Wiki Lecture, sir.
396
00:22:11,060 --> 00:22:12,860
It's a non-profit organization...
397
00:22:12,940 --> 00:22:15,180
...whose sole aim is
to make videos of lectures...
398
00:22:15,260 --> 00:22:18,020
...and help those students...
399
00:22:18,100 --> 00:22:20,380
...who aren't able to attend lectures.
400
00:22:20,460 --> 00:22:23,700
Wait a second.
This is very distracting.
401
00:22:23,780 --> 00:22:26,140
Imagine, sir.
402
00:22:26,340 --> 00:22:29,740
When these videos will be seen
in every corner of the world...
403
00:22:29,820 --> 00:22:33,100
...you'll become famous like Salman Khan.
404
00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:37,620
From Khan Academy.
Not the one from Being Human.
405
00:22:37,980 --> 00:22:42,380
And finally, you'll get
million dollar aide from Bill Gates.
406
00:22:42,460 --> 00:22:44,700
The Padmashree and a shawl
from the Indian Government.
407
00:22:44,780 --> 00:22:47,460
And maybe gain respect from every student.
408
00:22:47,730 --> 00:22:49,570
I promise you, sir.
409
00:22:56,940 --> 00:22:59,060
19.3 boules.
410
00:22:59,140 --> 00:23:01,020
It's maths class.
411
00:23:01,220 --> 00:23:04,540
Oh! Maths class.
412
00:23:07,180 --> 00:23:08,460
You're doing the right thing.
413
00:23:08,700 --> 00:23:10,860
You're doing the right thing.
Look at him, great fellow.
414
00:23:11,660 --> 00:23:14,340
- Keep it up. Do it. Yes.
- Come on, sir.
415
00:23:14,740 --> 00:23:16,460
For every epsilon greater than 0...
416
00:23:16,540 --> 00:23:18,500
Sir, towards left.
417
00:23:18,580 --> 00:23:19,220
Yes.
418
00:23:19,300 --> 00:23:21,780
- For every epsilon and find the 0...
- Sir, show the right profile.
419
00:23:22,460 --> 00:23:23,820
Catch the light.
420
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:25,290
Perfect.
421
00:23:25,620 --> 00:23:28,020
- So for every epsilon and find the 0..
- Smile.
422
00:23:28,100 --> 00:23:30,060
A bit more. Bit more.
423
00:23:30,940 --> 00:23:32,220
Now continue.
424
00:23:32,300 --> 00:23:34,900
For every epsilon,
you've to find an N.
425
00:23:34,980 --> 00:23:37,020
Can you see that?
I am sure you can see this.
426
00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:40,260
There is N. And once you find N,
your problem will be solved.
427
00:23:40,340 --> 00:23:43,060
That is how we prove that
the sequence is converting.
428
00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:44,580
This difference has
to be lesser than epsilon.
429
00:23:44,660 --> 00:23:46,980
Bro, you cracked it.
430
00:23:48,300 --> 00:23:50,460
I mean you've become the
coordinator in the very first year.
431
00:23:51,860 --> 00:23:52,900
- Listen!
- Yes.
432
00:23:53,300 --> 00:23:55,140
Make me your secretary.
433
00:23:55,220 --> 00:23:57,940
- Please.
- What are you saying?
434
00:23:58,020 --> 00:24:00,700
- Apply with a proper resume?
- What?
435
00:24:00,780 --> 00:24:03,660
And don't forget to
add your extra-curriculars.
436
00:24:03,740 --> 00:24:05,820
We need a multi-faceted personality.
437
00:24:05,900 --> 00:24:08,500
Chirag, my yellow bear.
438
00:24:08,580 --> 00:24:10,740
Heard you've created quite a stir, huh!
439
00:24:10,820 --> 00:24:13,180
Bro, not just from this batch...
440
00:24:13,260 --> 00:24:15,740
..but kids from all the upcomimg
batches will worship him.
441
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:16,700
Hmm.
442
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,700
I'll go to Stanford not to seek admission,
but to give a Tedtalk.
443
00:24:20,980 --> 00:24:23,940
I'll make you the head
of the advisory council.
444
00:24:24,020 --> 00:24:26,510
You've solved all
the student's problems.
445
00:24:26,540 --> 00:24:27,370
Yes.
446
00:24:27,420 --> 00:24:29,140
Nobody is going to
miss a single lecture henceforth.
447
00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:31,340
You fool no one is going
to attend any.
448
00:24:32,100 --> 00:24:33,100
And, Ankit! Listen.
449
00:24:33,500 --> 00:24:36,180
Whenever you get a free time,
learn something from him.
450
00:24:36,700 --> 00:24:38,780
I honestly tried.
451
00:24:38,860 --> 00:24:41,780
I am joking. I know you tried.
452
00:24:41,860 --> 00:24:43,260
You are an asshole.
453
00:24:43,540 --> 00:24:44,740
Hey, asshole.
454
00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:53,100
Sir, what are you doing here?
455
00:24:53,900 --> 00:24:55,260
Is something wrong?
456
00:24:55,460 --> 00:24:56,820
Whose room is this?
457
00:25:01,340 --> 00:25:04,820
I mean you're right, sir.
It's completely their fault.
458
00:25:04,900 --> 00:25:05,980
But please forgive these naive kids.
459
00:25:06,060 --> 00:25:07,900
- Apologise...
- Shut up, Jhantoo.
460
00:25:07,980 --> 00:25:09,980
Sir, you know me? How come?
461
00:25:12,100 --> 00:25:13,820
Is this the only laptop in this room?
462
00:25:14,740 --> 00:25:16,980
IP address 108.13. Right?
463
00:25:17,060 --> 00:25:18,820
Yes, right.
464
00:25:19,020 --> 00:25:20,820
So you are 'cooldude69.'
465
00:25:21,260 --> 00:25:23,780
Sorry, we thought you are an asshole.
466
00:25:23,860 --> 00:25:24,820
'Cooldude?' Me?
467
00:25:24,900 --> 00:25:26,700
No. I'm 'Steve Gates.'
468
00:25:27,220 --> 00:25:28,500
- Really?
- Yes.
469
00:25:28,580 --> 00:25:30,820
- Show ?
- Yes, see.
470
00:25:38,100 --> 00:25:39,740
It's him.
471
00:25:42,940 --> 00:25:44,300
Are you ashamed to tell us?
472
00:25:44,380 --> 00:25:47,660
No. This is Ankit's ID, not mine.
473
00:25:48,700 --> 00:25:49,820
Yes.
474
00:25:51,060 --> 00:25:52,540
Sorry, sir.
475
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,020
Pleasure meeting you, 'cooldude69.'
476
00:26:01,020 --> 00:26:03,780
aka Ankit Pandey.
477
00:26:04,900 --> 00:26:06,020
Very talented.
478
00:26:06,100 --> 00:26:07,900
Sir, you're wrong.
479
00:26:07,980 --> 00:26:09,340
Finger on your lips.
480
00:26:09,980 --> 00:26:11,420
Do you know who he is?
481
00:26:12,020 --> 00:26:15,380
After DPS MMS,
'Savita Bhabhi' and 'Sunny Leone...'
482
00:26:15,460 --> 00:26:17,980
...the Indian porn industry's fourth
evolution is 'Kavita Aunty.'
483
00:26:18,980 --> 00:26:20,380
For the first time in four years...
484
00:26:20,460 --> 00:26:23,540
I've shared porn with my friends
at IIT and not the other way around.
485
00:26:23,820 --> 00:26:26,380
Those guys have whitewashed
the walls of thier rooms.
486
00:26:27,140 --> 00:26:30,460
And he is the one who seeded
the porn in the campus.
487
00:26:31,060 --> 00:26:33,300
You brought Kavita Aunty here.
488
00:26:34,780 --> 00:26:35,980
- Respect.
- Yes.
489
00:26:36,060 --> 00:26:39,500
Learn to respect the talent.
490
00:26:41,140 --> 00:26:44,380
Bro, I am in the fourth year.
491
00:26:44,980 --> 00:26:47,620
And I've had sex, twice.
492
00:26:48,220 --> 00:26:52,140
I never thought I will find
my college zest back at this age.
493
00:26:52,780 --> 00:26:54,820
But the material you post...
494
00:26:55,900 --> 00:26:57,740
...it makes us feel fucking young!
495
00:26:58,370 --> 00:27:00,260
But why's the folder private?
496
00:27:00,700 --> 00:27:02,860
He was in the middle of jerking off.
497
00:27:03,060 --> 00:27:06,540
- I thought someone might complain...
- We'll screw him over.
498
00:27:07,220 --> 00:27:08,740
Share without a fear.
499
00:27:09,540 --> 00:27:12,020
How did you find Kavita Aunty?
500
00:27:12,220 --> 00:27:14,260
Even we visit xvideos and Pornhub.
501
00:27:14,340 --> 00:27:15,740
We never found it.
502
00:27:16,460 --> 00:27:18,780
Tell them. Why are you feeling so shy?
503
00:27:18,900 --> 00:27:20,900
Sir, he's not used to so much respect.
504
00:27:20,980 --> 00:27:21,980
Come on, tell them.
505
00:27:22,290 --> 00:27:26,410
Sometimes when you go to
15-16th pages of search results...
506
00:27:26,500 --> 00:27:31,580
...You find mind-blowing clips
from hours of repetitive videos.
507
00:27:31,660 --> 00:27:34,340
How do you know that you'll
find the right clip from this video?
508
00:27:34,420 --> 00:27:38,980
When there are acclaimed
porn directors like Brad Armstrong...
509
00:27:39,060 --> 00:27:40,780
...Greg Lansky, and Axel Braun...
510
00:27:41,260 --> 00:27:43,540
...then somewhere you'll
find good scenes.
511
00:27:43,620 --> 00:27:46,060
You even know the names
of the directors of porn films?
512
00:27:46,140 --> 00:27:47,300
Yes.
513
00:27:47,900 --> 00:27:52,380
I mean only those who've won an AVN
Award or are on the XCRO Hall of fame...
514
00:27:52,460 --> 00:27:56,620
...or may be those who get great
reviews on IAFD or Xcritic.
515
00:27:56,700 --> 00:27:58,220
Porn film reviews.
516
00:27:58,300 --> 00:28:00,380
Directors. Hall of Fame.
517
00:28:01,860 --> 00:28:03,340
Genius.
518
00:28:03,660 --> 00:28:05,300
If this is your performance
in the first year...
519
00:28:05,380 --> 00:28:06,980
...then I'm sure you'll
do wonders in the future.
520
00:28:07,780 --> 00:28:09,900
Tell them your mission, if you have any.
521
00:28:10,900 --> 00:28:14,660
Nothing, sir. I was thinking
about getting Deepfakes porn.
522
00:28:14,740 --> 00:28:16,700
One with 3D virtual reality.
523
00:28:19,380 --> 00:28:20,620
You are Dopa.
524
00:28:20,900 --> 00:28:21,740
Do...pa.
525
00:28:21,820 --> 00:28:23,260
Do...pa. You are Dopa.
526
00:28:23,340 --> 00:28:24,700
Hello.
527
00:28:25,660 --> 00:28:28,380
You should fold your hands to Dopa,
and not shake them.
528
00:28:31,060 --> 00:28:33,340
I've made your folder public again.
Come on. Get to work.
529
00:28:33,420 --> 00:28:36,300
And listen, if you need anything.
530
00:28:36,500 --> 00:28:38,780
Just say it in front of
any laptop or phone on a campus.
531
00:28:39,340 --> 00:28:40,500
We'll hear it.
532
00:28:42,730 --> 00:28:43,900
We're leaving now.
533
00:28:44,900 --> 00:28:45,940
We've got some work to do.
534
00:28:47,820 --> 00:28:48,860
Move.
535
00:28:52,660 --> 00:28:54,020
Fsociety.
536
00:28:55,020 --> 00:28:58,180
Great! You are a Dopa now.
537
00:28:58,780 --> 00:29:00,340
Great.
538
00:29:00,620 --> 00:29:02,260
Who were they, Jhantoo?
539
00:29:02,340 --> 00:29:03,380
These guys are very famous.
540
00:29:03,460 --> 00:29:05,780
They hacked the Sudama Bank's website.
541
00:29:05,860 --> 00:29:07,660
Every student on the campus knows about it.
542
00:29:07,740 --> 00:29:09,980
What? Everyone?
543
00:29:10,300 --> 00:29:13,540
Then I should've
joined the hacking club.
544
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:15,720
I can't believe it.
545
00:29:15,740 --> 00:29:18,620
They came into your
room and made you Dopa.
546
00:29:18,980 --> 00:29:22,580
Jhantoo, what is Dopa?
547
00:29:24,020 --> 00:29:28,260
D-O-P-A. Dopa.
548
00:29:28,660 --> 00:29:32,180
It means, 'Dean of Pondy Affairs.'
549
00:29:32,820 --> 00:29:35,220
I'm sure you're wonderig what Pondy is.
550
00:29:35,740 --> 00:29:37,820
It's the nickname for pornography.
551
00:29:38,180 --> 00:29:39,420
You're right.
552
00:29:39,500 --> 00:29:42,500
In engineering colleges,
there's a nickname even for pornography.
553
00:29:42,740 --> 00:29:43,900
Pondy!
554
00:29:44,140 --> 00:29:45,880
At hostels, you can earn
555
00:29:46,220 --> 00:29:51,640
cult status, social service and
responsibility through Pondy,
556
00:29:52,060 --> 00:29:53,220
and make you 'the Dopa.'
557
00:29:54,020 --> 00:29:57,740
Selfish people collect coins,
stamps and souvenirs for themselves.
558
00:29:58,140 --> 00:30:02,300
But Dopa collects porn for everyone.
559
00:30:03,450 --> 00:30:05,890
"The world is my family."
560
00:30:09,940 --> 00:30:13,620
An ideal Dopa keeps
everyone's preference in mind.
561
00:30:14,140 --> 00:30:15,060
His.
562
00:30:15,660 --> 00:30:16,700
His.
563
00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:17,940
His.
564
00:30:18,020 --> 00:30:19,940
And his.
565
00:30:20,740 --> 00:30:27,300
Only he knows what's being downloaded
in which corner of the girl's hostel.
566
00:30:28,900 --> 00:30:31,500
But Dopa never reveals.
567
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:33,740
What?
568
00:30:33,860 --> 00:30:35,020
Nothing.
569
00:30:36,060 --> 00:30:37,900
There are times when
not a single person from
570
00:30:37,930 --> 00:30:39,770
the entire batch knows
about Dopa's identity.
571
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:44,060
But the batches that don't have a Dopa,
know how it feels to not have one.
572
00:30:44,740 --> 00:30:47,780
Dopa cannot write his
achievements on his resume...
573
00:30:48,140 --> 00:30:50,220
...nor he can say it on any interview.
574
00:30:50,740 --> 00:30:53,540
But he still works all night.
575
00:30:56,700 --> 00:30:58,180
'Musu Musu Haasi...'
576
00:31:00,140 --> 00:31:01,500
'Deo Malai Lai'
577
00:31:01,700 --> 00:31:02,820
Again.
578
00:31:03,300 --> 00:31:05,700
Play it.
579
00:31:06,740 --> 00:31:12,740
'Musu Musu Haasi'
580
00:31:13,060 --> 00:31:16,340
Because feeding
a hungry soul his favourite food...
581
00:31:16,420 --> 00:31:21,500
...and watching him sleep comfortably
is a blissful feeling.
582
00:31:38,700 --> 00:31:40,420
You're back!
40680
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