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1
00:00:01,126 --> 00:00:02,956
♪ Kick it down on Crash and Bern ♪
2
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[shouting]
3
00:00:10,468 --> 00:00:12,138
What are you clowns doing?
4
00:00:12,220 --> 00:00:14,220
Playing tether pickle.
5
00:00:14,305 --> 00:00:16,845
No, I mean, what are you clowns
doing after high school?
6
00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:18,733
Because it's obviously not college.
7
00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:23,732
Who needs college if you're
a highly paid tether pickler?
8
00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:25,817
What does the winner get?
9
00:00:25,900 --> 00:00:27,650
Nothing. We're just playing for fun.
10
00:00:27,736 --> 00:00:29,146
I played for fun once.
11
00:00:29,237 --> 00:00:30,567
It's a loser's game.
12
00:00:30,655 --> 00:00:32,065
You guys need a wager.
13
00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:36,117
You mean like if Bernstein
drinks all this pickle water,
14
00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:37,502
you'll give me your boots?
15
00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:39,119
Ha! You're on!
16
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:41,495
I know from experience
that the last four ounces
17
00:00:41,583 --> 00:00:43,713
don't go as smoothly as the first 28.
18
00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:45,917
Okay, wait, wait, wait.
19
00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:48,554
Why do I have to drink the pickle water
and then he gets the boots?
20
00:00:48,631 --> 00:00:50,511
I'm not getting anything out of this.
21
00:00:50,592 --> 00:00:52,222
Not with that attitude, you're not.
22
00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:56,096
[retching]
23
00:00:57,390 --> 00:01:00,020
Ah, the scent of victory.
24
00:01:00,101 --> 00:01:02,691
Funny how it smells
like old boots and vomit.
25
00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:05,228
I'm gonna need those boots back.
26
00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:06,685
I got a wedding next month.
27
00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:08,645
-Double or nothing?
-You're on.
28
00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:12,195
[grunting] A hundred eight.
29
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:15,370
A hundred nine.
30
00:01:15,450 --> 00:01:18,370
Aggh! 110!
31
00:01:18,453 --> 00:01:22,253
-Whoo!
-Whoo! I did it! 10 push-ups!
32
00:01:23,458 --> 00:01:26,418
It is more impressive
when you start counting at 100.
33
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,633
You stink at wagering.
34
00:01:28,713 --> 00:01:31,343
We won your diploma,
your Taffy collection
35
00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:34,054
and the right to make you rap on command.
36
00:01:34,135 --> 00:01:38,305
In fact... [beat-boxing]
37
00:01:38,390 --> 00:01:40,730
♪ My name is Marty PoulosAnd I'm here to say ♪
38
00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:43,439
♪ I dislike you both in a violent way! ♪
39
00:01:44,396 --> 00:01:45,476
[beat-boxing]
40
00:01:45,563 --> 00:01:47,023
Give me my stuff back!
41
00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,397
What do you have to offer?
42
00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:51,571
This book is my most prized possession.
43
00:01:51,653 --> 00:01:53,783
My mother read it to me
every night before bed.
44
00:01:55,573 --> 00:01:57,243
That's a book on motorcycle repair.
45
00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,367
A lot of motorcycles broke in my dreams!
46
00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:03,747
Grease monkey: The artof motorcycle maintenance.
47
00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:05,132
Let's do this.
48
00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:08,548
I bet Bernstein can put on all the clothes
in his closet in five minutes.
49
00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:09,418
You're on.
50
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:15,337
-Four minutes and 53 seconds.
-[Crash] Ha ha!
51
00:02:15,427 --> 00:02:16,507
Seriously?
52
00:02:16,594 --> 00:02:19,104
I've seen you take
20 minutes to tie a shoe.
53
00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:22,230
Ha ha! We win! Face slam!
54
00:02:22,308 --> 00:02:24,728
-[laughs]
-Ah, oh, ah!
55
00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,519
Careful with that book.
56
00:02:27,605 --> 00:02:29,725
All the secrets to being
a man are in there,
57
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:32,236
from changing oil
to changing spark plugs.
58
00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,654
Really doesn't take
that much to be a man.
59
00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:36,697
It looks good.
60
00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:39,870
You're eating my book!
61
00:02:39,951 --> 00:02:42,621
No, I'm eatingmy book.
62
00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:48,082
♪ Let me tell you about the Bernsteins ♪
63
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:50,208
♪ Yo, I'ma let you finish ♪
64
00:02:50,295 --> 00:02:51,955
-♪ But ding-dong ♪
-♪ Who's that? ♪
65
00:02:52,047 --> 00:02:53,127
♪ Yo, it's Crash at the door ♪
66
00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:55,804
♪ Don't wait for you to openKick it down hard core ♪
67
00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:58,094
♪ A purple with a 'tudeWhere your mom hide the food? ♪
68
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,888
-♪ In the fridge ♪
-♪ I'ma eat it then we tear it up, dude
69
00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:03,312
♪ No make-up or feelingsTea parties or dolls ♪
70
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:04,561
♪ Now it's ninjas and football ♪
71
00:03:04,642 --> 00:03:05,812
-♪ And face slams ♪
-♪ Good call ♪
72
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:07,194
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
73
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:08,440
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
74
00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:09,901
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
75
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:10,821
♪ What he said ♪
76
00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:12,229
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
77
00:03:12,317 --> 00:03:13,567
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
78
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:14,991
♪ Crash and Bernstein ♪
79
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,030
♪ What he said ♪
80
00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:18,282
♪ It's war against awesomeBut awesome's gotta soar ♪
81
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:20,985
-♪ I'll be grounded forever ♪
-♪ That's what friends are for ♪
82
00:03:21,076 --> 00:03:23,236
♪ Crash and BernsteinCrash and Bernstein ♪
83
00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,038
-♪ Crash and Bern... ♪
-♪ I said "Stein" ♪
84
00:03:25,121 --> 00:03:26,711
♪ What he said ♪
85
00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:29,084
[chuckles]
86
00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,919
♪ Let me here you say Crash ♪
87
00:03:32,003 --> 00:03:34,013
-You Pesto?
-Yeah.
88
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:36,549
But that's not a real police car.
89
00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:38,223
And Pesto's not a real name.
90
00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:41,762
This is my department-issued P.E.V.--
91
00:03:41,846 --> 00:03:43,346
personal electric vehicle.
92
00:03:44,182 --> 00:03:45,682
I signed up for a ride-along.
93
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,267
And instead you got chosen
for a run-behind. That's even better.
94
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:50,193
-No, it's not.
-Yes, it is.
95
00:03:50,271 --> 00:03:52,901
-No, it's really not.
-Yes, it really is.
96
00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:55,612
Oh, by the way, I will win this argument.
I'm a police officer.
97
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:59,163
And a Capricorn,
and that's why I'm moody in the summer.
98
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:02,236
-It's spring.
-Don't push me, all right?
99
00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:04,953
Here we go.
100
00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:07,656
Run behind. Here we go.
Hup! Two, three, four.
101
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:09,037
Hup, two-- where you at?
102
00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:12,128
[hooting]
103
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:14,211
Gunky carburetor!
104
00:04:15,130 --> 00:04:16,420
Gas line! Gunky clog!
105
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,626
Oh, boy! Take this off.
106
00:04:18,717 --> 00:04:21,087
Smack this, spin this.
107
00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:23,047
[hoots]
108
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:25,598
Okeydoke! All done!
109
00:04:25,682 --> 00:04:28,062
-Enjoy.
-[engine starts]
110
00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:31,563
-What do you think you're doing?
-I'm a grease monkey.
111
00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:34,976
I ate a motorcycle book
and now I can fix motorcycles.
112
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:36,026
[laughs] Yeah.
113
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,569
You can't make repairs without a license.
114
00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:42,657
-That just cost you a hundred bucks.
-Oh.
115
00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,490
Now it cost me nothing.
116
00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:48,158
Okay, all right.
117
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:49,826
All right, ripping up a ticket.
118
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:52,957
That's another 300 smackers.
119
00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:55,165
Three hundred smackers?
120
00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:57,053
Pesto, keep count.
121
00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:59,170
[grunting]
122
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:03,007
[Crash laughing]
123
00:05:03,094 --> 00:05:04,604
I think that was only seven, sir.
124
00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:06,770
You will pay for these tickets.
125
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:09,598
Okay, how much do I owe you?
126
00:05:10,226 --> 00:05:12,346
Oh, hey, I have a wallet just
like that, with a chain--
127
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:15,646
Give me that!
128
00:05:19,194 --> 00:05:22,074
[machine whirring]
129
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,195
Plugs changed!
130
00:05:23,907 --> 00:05:24,867
Suspension fixed!
131
00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:27,449
Next!
132
00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,205
Ooh, ripped seat.
133
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:33,538
Faulty wires, busted spokes, blown belts.
134
00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:34,825
Ooh, banana break.
135
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,963
Crash, what did you do to our hangout?
136
00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:40,377
Isn't it great? [hoots]
137
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,505
Best motorcycle shop ever!
138
00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:45,012
I'm gonna get money
to pay back my tickets.
139
00:05:45,095 --> 00:05:48,005
But you got those tickets
for fixing motorcycles without a license.
140
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:50,518
Yep, pretty smart, huh?
141
00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:55,023
-Where'd you get all these tools?
-Oh, I won them from Mr. Poulos.
142
00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:58,185
Never challenge a monkey
to a poop-throwing contest.
143
00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:02,275
That's really good advice.
I got that in a fortune cookie once.
144
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,532
And check it out, Bernstein,
145
00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:06,703
I have everything a guy
needs to fix motorcycles.
146
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,663
-Perspiration.
-Gross.
147
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,663
Inspiration. Hyah!
148
00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:15,785
Well, that's something I can't unsee.
149
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,130
And a place for meditation.
150
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,716
It's really a stinky bathroom.
151
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:23,758
We have to shut this place down...
152
00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,350
Tomorrow.
153
00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:31,427
Okay, single file, people,
154
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:33,056
and don't wander into the service area.
155
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:36,943
-Grease monkey is very territorial.
-[shrieking]
156
00:06:42,694 --> 00:06:43,824
Sorry, old friend.
157
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:46,663
This color TV fad
is lasting longer than I thought.
158
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:52,119
[imitating siren wailing]
159
00:06:52,203 --> 00:06:53,623
Darn it, Pesto!
160
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:55,915
The siren stops when the P.E.V. Stops.
161
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:58,079
[wails]
162
00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:05,219
Oh, now write this man up
for illegally dumping trash.
163
00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,720
That's not trash.
That's a working television.
164
00:07:07,802 --> 00:07:09,352
In that case, I'm confiscating it.
165
00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:11,469
Pesto, collect the evidence
166
00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:14,266
and make sure that it's transported
safely to my rumpus room.
167
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:16,941
Don't listen to this tricycle cop.
168
00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:17,980
He's riding that thing
169
00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:20,773
because he backed
his patrol car into my building!
170
00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:23,147
-And you turned me in!
-You broke my building!
171
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:24,824
So you guys know each other?
172
00:07:30,992 --> 00:07:33,122
Oh! Bernstein, it's coming on!
173
00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:38,581
Bring your bike, your chopper ,
174
00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,707
even your grand mammy's scooter
175
00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,174
down to grease monkey motorcycle repair.
176
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:46,054
We have the fastest mechanicin all of Portland.
177
00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:49,389
But don't take my word for it.
178
00:07:49,969 --> 00:07:55,519
Like you, I trust all my finemechanical work to monkeys.
179
00:07:56,601 --> 00:07:58,401
Grease monkey is honest,
180
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:01,188
courteous and he'll eatthe fleas off your back
181
00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:04,112
for no extra charge.
182
00:08:04,943 --> 00:08:09,663
When my hog blew a gasketfrom illegal street racing,
183
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:11,659
grease monkey fixed it
184
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:15,201
and gave me his recipefor banana bread.
185
00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:19,119
No one fixes motorcyclesfaster than grease monkey.
186
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:24,840
In fact, we'll fix your bike in one dayor refund your money.
187
00:08:24,921 --> 00:08:27,471
Plus, Bernstein will washyour cat's butt.
188
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:31,679
-What?
-But don't take my word for it.
189
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:34,221
Listen to this satisfied customer.
190
00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:38,265
[meows, purrs]
191
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:40,851
Wait. You said you were
gonna edit that part out.
192
00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:43,307
People really seem to like
my banana bread recipe.
193
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:44,568
Not that thing.
194
00:08:44,649 --> 00:08:46,439
The thing about washing cat butts.
195
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:49,106
Oh. I don't know what your secret is,
196
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,865
but that cat sure seemed happy.
197
00:08:57,912 --> 00:08:59,752
[cats meowing]
198
00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:01,001
That's a lot of customers.
199
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,132
Are you sure you're gonna
be able to fix all these?
200
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:06,419
Don't worry, Bernstein.
I am completely focused.
201
00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:08,674
Nothing can distract me.
202
00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:10,337
Ooh, bathroom's open!
203
00:09:12,886 --> 00:09:15,466
-[meows]
-Oh, good.
204
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,305
You brought your cat's butt.
205
00:09:18,516 --> 00:09:20,386
Yikes. What, is his tongue broken?
206
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:23,688
Good morning, young man.
207
00:09:23,772 --> 00:09:25,402
Any crime around these parts?
208
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:26,982
Whoa. Nice holster.
209
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,027
I can see you're packing nothing.
210
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:30,360
Not true.
211
00:09:30,445 --> 00:09:33,315
I'm carrying officer Plotkin's
non-dairy creamer.
212
00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:36,366
He's as intolerant of lactose
as he is of crime.
213
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,999
Eww! It stinks in there.
214
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:44,042
Who hung this thing? Yuck!
215
00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:47,205
Wait. What happened?
Why aren't you grease monkey?
216
00:09:48,672 --> 00:09:49,962
I have no idea.
217
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:54,427
Oh, no, you must have passed
the motorcycle book out of your system.
218
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,055
I do feel 327 pages lighter.
219
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:02,810
[screeches]
220
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,476
Please tell me you still know
how to fix motorcycles.
221
00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:08,323
Of course I still know
how to fix motorcycles.
222
00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:13,859
No, stop, stop.
223
00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:16,281
Man, I need to get that book back.
224
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:22,080
Okay, new plan.
225
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:29,665
All right, give me my stuff back.
226
00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:32,174
I have a date tonight,
and I wanna show her my diploma.
227
00:10:32,841 --> 00:10:34,551
Then all that's left
to do is convince her
228
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:37,104
that plumbers college is
a prestigious law school.
229
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:40,814
Hold on. I said I wanted to make a deal.
230
00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,680
What do you want me to do?
Roll around like a slug?
231
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:44,887
Paint a face on my chin
and talk upside down?
232
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,148
No-- you can do that?
233
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,066
For a price.
234
00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:52,738
Anyways, Crash doesn't know
how to fix motorcycles anymore,
235
00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:54,399
and Ireally need your help.
236
00:10:55,030 --> 00:10:56,610
I'll give you your tools back.
237
00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:58,368
I suppose I can help you.
238
00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:01,080
Good. I really don't
wanna wash cat butts.
239
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,501
You're offering to wash cat butts?
How do I get in on that?
240
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:05,791
You don't even have a cat.
241
00:11:05,874 --> 00:11:07,174
If it's free, I can get one.
242
00:11:12,464 --> 00:11:15,724
Okay, then I connect
the shiny metal thingy...
243
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:17,590
-[grinding]
-To the circle doodad.
244
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:20,177
Oops. Wrong tool.
245
00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:23,103
[grunting]
246
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:27,645
Oh! Oh, I see what the problem is.
247
00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:29,899
I don't know what I'm doing!
248
00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:33,614
That's right, Crash.
249
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:37,993
I don't know what we're doing either
with these low, low prices.
250
00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:39,413
Yeah.
251
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:44,617
You have to get me out of this.
That lady owns a cat shelter.
252
00:11:45,622 --> 00:11:47,582
[meowing]
253
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,665
Relax, I'm on it.
254
00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:51,421
Just keep Crash away from me.
255
00:11:51,503 --> 00:11:52,753
Crash, take a break.
256
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:54,667
Great, I'm starving.
257
00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:59,642
Oh, Modern Archery .
258
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:01,260
This looks good.
259
00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,603
-[yelps]
-What the...?
260
00:12:07,644 --> 00:12:09,944
I am Sir Crash of Locksley.
261
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:12,401
'Tis a lovely day for a fool hunt.
262
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:14,282
[gasps] Gob smack!
263
00:12:14,359 --> 00:12:16,069
There's a fool now.
264
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:17,821
[screams]
265
00:12:28,123 --> 00:12:29,873
Get away from me, you're making me angry.
266
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:34,500
Angry: exhibiting a characteristic
or creating a mood associated with anger.
267
00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:37,507
See... Mr. Poulos. I'll show you a mood.
268
00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:41,851
Mr. Poulos: a man
who hits like a baby bird.
269
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:43,678
Synonym: Weakling.
270
00:12:50,437 --> 00:12:51,517
Now what?
271
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:52,694
[sighs]
272
00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:56,281
I feel like a man whose hopes
have been destroyed,
273
00:12:56,359 --> 00:13:00,109
who dances beautifully, but always alone.
274
00:13:01,364 --> 00:13:02,284
What did you just say?
275
00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:05,867
Sorry, Mr. Poulos,
but Crash just ate your diary.
276
00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:08,709
[blubbers]
277
00:13:09,998 --> 00:13:11,538
[both wailing]
278
00:13:13,668 --> 00:13:17,048
You will get to Paris someday!
I just know it!
279
00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:22,587
[imitating siren wailing]
280
00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:25,309
Ow!
281
00:13:26,890 --> 00:13:28,600
What are you doing back there?
282
00:13:29,309 --> 00:13:30,269
Sorry, sir.
283
00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:33,692
This comic book's really good.
It's about a super cop.
284
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,112
Oh, is that so?
285
00:13:35,190 --> 00:13:36,820
And how does one become a super cop?
286
00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:39,904
In this case, he gets bitten
by a radioactive cop.
287
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:41,986
Oh, makes sense.
288
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:47,294
-[backfires]
-Come on! Come on, baby.
289
00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:49,539
Come on! Come on!
290
00:13:49,621 --> 00:13:52,621
Work it... No! Fiddlesticks!
291
00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:55,841
You should get this fixed.
292
00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:58,379
Oh, I can't bring it to the police garage.
293
00:13:58,421 --> 00:14:01,721
I've already totaled two cruisers,
one motorcycle and a horse.
294
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,722
One more busted vehicle,
I'm on mall duty.
295
00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:07,140
And you don't ever come back from that.
296
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:12,727
Maybe my friends can fix it.
They run the grease monkey garage.
297
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:15,150
The one with the cat butt guarantee?
298
00:14:15,814 --> 00:14:17,774
You think they'll do a dog
under seven pounds?
299
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:19,227
I can put in a word.
300
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,531
All right, that's the last one.
301
00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:28,406
I wish we could stay open longer.
302
00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:30,913
We're still a few hundred short
of paying Crash's tickets.
303
00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:31,905
Not my problem.
304
00:14:31,996 --> 00:14:34,706
Finding a diet cotton candy,
that's my problem.
305
00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:38,458
At ease, civilians.
306
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:41,125
We're here on official police business.
307
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:44,344
You have a pepper mill
and a cucumber in your utility belt.
308
00:14:44,426 --> 00:14:46,296
What are you gonna do? Make us a salad?
309
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:47,846
If I have to.
310
00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:51,099
You guys think you could fix this?
311
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:53,142
Wait a minute. He works here?
312
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,806
What's it to you, Plotkin?
313
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,944
You probably can't tell
from the tone of his voice,
314
00:14:57,022 --> 00:14:58,822
but he doesn't like you.
315
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:02,648
Oh, well, I guess I won't be
invited to his birthday party.
316
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:03,986
You're right. You won't.
317
00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:07,030
And it's at the roller rink,
so it stinks to be you.
318
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:10,831
Officer, Mr. Poulos is
an excellent mechanic.
319
00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:12,946
We'll fix your scooter.
320
00:15:13,038 --> 00:15:14,408
It's not a scooter.
321
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:16,037
Do I look like a man who scoots?
322
00:15:16,750 --> 00:15:17,580
Uh...
323
00:15:18,710 --> 00:15:19,540
Yes?
324
00:15:21,379 --> 00:15:22,709
I'll make you a deal.
325
00:15:22,797 --> 00:15:26,587
We'll fix your whatever-you-call-it
if you rip up Crash's tickets.
326
00:15:28,011 --> 00:15:30,431
Deal. And, Poulos,
327
00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:32,063
if anything happens to this baby,
328
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:34,100
I will make your life a living nightmare.
329
00:15:34,184 --> 00:15:35,394
Ha! Too late!
330
00:15:35,477 --> 00:15:37,517
It already is, sucka!
331
00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,364
-[laughs]
-Come on.
332
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:42,685
This should be easy.
Probably just the motor.
333
00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:44,400
Let's take a look.
334
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,155
Oh! I see the problem.
335
00:15:48,239 --> 00:15:50,779
There's a cashew wedged in the gearbox.
336
00:15:52,577 --> 00:15:53,447
Start 'er up.
337
00:15:54,371 --> 00:15:55,501
Yay! New thing!
338
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:57,870
-Crash, no!
-Giddyap, hondo.
339
00:15:57,957 --> 00:16:00,627
Wohoo!
340
00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:02,960
[crashes]
341
00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:06,717
Guys, we're gonna need a new new thing.
342
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:14,350
Hey, I stopped by the hangout and...
[high-pitched screaming]
343
00:16:14,432 --> 00:16:15,932
Oh my gosh!
344
00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,137
Is this the personal electric vehicle?
345
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:19,348
What have you done?
346
00:16:19,437 --> 00:16:21,107
Don't get your bloomers in a bunch.
347
00:16:21,189 --> 00:16:22,569
I got the instructions.
348
00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:33,240
Get if off me!
349
00:16:34,828 --> 00:16:36,538
You should read my comic book.
350
00:16:36,621 --> 00:16:38,461
The hero rides a vehicle like this,
351
00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:41,460
except it has a turbo button
and a self-destruct mechanism.
352
00:16:41,543 --> 00:16:43,383
You should have
a self-destruct mechanism.
353
00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:50,546
Mr. Poulos, did you finish?
354
00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:52,345
Don't eat my beard, you pirate!
355
00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:55,430
How much of that did you hear?
356
00:16:56,099 --> 00:16:56,929
Too much.
357
00:17:00,729 --> 00:17:03,019
It's not fixed! You said
you were gonna fix it.
358
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:05,316
I tried. Look at this.
359
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,610
The instructions are
all pictures and arrows.
360
00:17:08,319 --> 00:17:09,819
Hey, I can do this.
361
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:12,824
Kids my age read better
when there are no words.
362
00:17:12,907 --> 00:17:15,867
Ha! If you can fix this,
I'll pull out a tooth.
363
00:17:15,952 --> 00:17:18,912
-Thanks, but there's really no need--
-Ah! A bet's a bet.
364
00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:24,791
Ta-da!
365
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:26,168
Na-Na!
366
00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:28,878
Crash, what are you doing?
I already fixed it.
367
00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:31,175
And I re-fixed it, Bernstein.
368
00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:32,219
Give my compliments
369
00:17:32,302 --> 00:17:34,352
to the chef who wrote
that instruction manual.
370
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:36,309
[kisses] Magnifique!
371
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:39,429
A-ha! Technically you didn't fix it.
372
00:17:39,517 --> 00:17:40,557
So the bet's off.
373
00:17:40,643 --> 00:17:43,863
Although, I got a molar
that's been giving me the what-for.
374
00:17:43,938 --> 00:17:45,438
Here, do me a solid.
375
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,783
Yank this string.
376
00:17:46,858 --> 00:17:48,228
Ha, I'll pass.
377
00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:53,699
The instruction manual didn't fill me up,
so I ate Pesto's comic book, too.
378
00:17:53,782 --> 00:17:56,832
That's where I got the idea
to install the turbo button
379
00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,000
and a self-destruct mechanism.
380
00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:01,832
Wait, did you say self-destruct?
381
00:18:01,915 --> 00:18:05,085
Yeah, the button's here
on the key chain next to the alarm.
382
00:18:05,168 --> 00:18:07,958
-Why would you--
-I know what you're gonna say.
383
00:18:08,046 --> 00:18:11,716
Why install an alarm instead
of a second self-destruct button?
384
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,010
Live and learn.
385
00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:20,352
All right, my vehicle better be ready,
or I'm busting out the pepper spray.
386
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:21,773
-[Crash gasps]
-[laughs]
387
00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:24,271
Just kidding. They took
away my pepper spray.
388
00:18:24,354 --> 00:18:27,234
This is just olive oil.
It'll still sting your eyes.
389
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:28,355
It's infused with garlic.
390
00:18:28,983 --> 00:18:31,033
Don't mention the new stuff.
391
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:33,031
That red thing's a turbo button.
392
00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:34,323
Why do I even try?
393
00:18:35,365 --> 00:18:38,735
I'd didn't ask for a turbo button.
That doesn't sound safe.
394
00:18:38,827 --> 00:18:41,827
-Oh, it isn't.
-Then I don't want it.
395
00:18:41,913 --> 00:18:43,583
Deal's off. This isn't fixed.
396
00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:47,785
Wait, I'm sure it's fine.
Crash will test it.
397
00:18:47,877 --> 00:18:49,667
Huh. Okay.
398
00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:53,172
Ride down to 3rd and Baker
and grab me a froyo.
399
00:18:53,258 --> 00:18:55,888
Be back in five minutes or no deal.
400
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:58,349
What? That's impossible.
It's four miles away.
401
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,431
Yeah, wouldn't you rather just have
Bernstein wash your cats' butts?
402
00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:04,440
Time to test out that turbo button.
403
00:19:04,519 --> 00:19:08,729
W-Wait, wait-- [screaming]
404
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:13,190
Hey, Lenny, nice toupee!
405
00:19:13,278 --> 00:19:14,898
[screaming]
406
00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:20,162
Hey, Lenny, sorry about your toupee.
407
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:24,710
[tires screech]
408
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:26,789
-[clicks]
-Oh, impressive.
409
00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:29,035
I know. You can barely
tell that it's a wig.
410
00:19:30,754 --> 00:19:32,764
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
411
00:19:33,631 --> 00:19:35,261
Okay, give me the keys.
412
00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:36,932
First, there's something you should know
413
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:38,850
about the alarm button on the key chain.
414
00:19:38,928 --> 00:19:40,348
You're just a kid.
415
00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:41,772
What do you know about key chains?
416
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,848
I'll have you know I work
as a valet on weekends.
417
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:46,603
-But it's-- no, it'll go...
-[speaking gibberish]
418
00:19:46,686 --> 00:19:48,936
-[mimics explosion]
-The keys.
419
00:19:49,022 --> 00:19:51,152
Okay, in that case,
420
00:19:51,232 --> 00:19:53,572
will you please rip up
Crash's tickets first?
421
00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:02,622
It's not littering if a cop does it.
422
00:20:04,329 --> 00:20:05,289
All right.
423
00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:08,672
[car chirps]
424
00:20:10,085 --> 00:20:11,415
[sighs]
425
00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:14,093
-Hmm. What does this other button do?
-[all gasp]
426
00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:23,014
No!
427
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:26,516
It's not a total loss.
428
00:20:26,601 --> 00:20:28,401
At least your siren still works.
429
00:20:28,478 --> 00:20:30,438
Go ahead, Pesto. Cheer him up.
430
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:34,534
[imitating siren]
431
00:20:40,115 --> 00:20:43,785
Aghh! Who orders froyo
without gummy bears?
432
00:20:43,868 --> 00:20:45,328
I can't eat this.
433
00:20:45,412 --> 00:20:47,082
[chuckles] Who am I kidding?
434
00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:48,123
Down the hatch.
435
00:20:49,124 --> 00:20:50,964
[mumbles] Mmm, good.
436
00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:58,508
My name is Marty Poulos.
437
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:01,391
You might know me from Portland's
Hottest Plumber calendar.
438
00:21:01,469 --> 00:21:03,049
I was Mr. October.
439
00:21:03,722 --> 00:21:05,272
Maybe this will jog your memory.
440
00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:11,479
I'm the best plumber in town,but don't take my word for it.
441
00:21:12,188 --> 00:21:15,938
Mr. Poulos came to fix my bathtub
442
00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:18,946
and ate all the salami in my fridge.
443
00:21:19,029 --> 00:21:21,069
You said that salami was up for grabs!
444
00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:25,036
And you said plumbers collegewas a law school.
445
00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:29,498
And another thing,when I call you to fix my bathtub,
446
00:21:29,581 --> 00:21:31,421
it's not a date!
447
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,340
♪ Crash and Bern, hard core ♪
448
00:21:37,464 --> 00:21:38,764
♪ Bass, bass ♪
449
00:21:42,886 --> 00:21:43,756
♪ What ♪
450
00:21:47,557 --> 00:21:48,677
♪ That's what friends are for ♪
451
00:21:48,767 --> 00:21:49,887
♪ Crash and Bern ♪
452
00:21:49,976 --> 00:21:51,346
♪ Tear it up, dude ♪
453
00:21:52,729 --> 00:21:53,769
♪ Good call ♪
454
00:21:53,855 --> 00:21:55,725
♪ Crash and BernCrash and Bern ♪
455
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,775
-♪ I said, "Stein" ♪
-♪ What he said ♪
33629
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