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1
00:02:04,788 --> 00:02:06,818
Hey, Dad.
Shit!
2
00:02:08,357 --> 00:02:10,487
You owe me a pack of smokes.
3
00:02:10,492 --> 00:02:12,162
Come on, it was one cigarette.
4
00:02:12,163 --> 00:02:13,590
Punitive damages.
5
00:02:14,761 --> 00:02:16,431
Here's a whole carton.
6
00:02:22,668 --> 00:02:23,728
So?
7
00:02:24,669 --> 00:02:25,729
Nothing.
8
00:02:27,537 --> 00:02:28,767
How's your mother?
9
00:02:29,605 --> 00:02:30,735
She's fine.
10
00:02:31,439 --> 00:02:33,739
You could call her Mary
every once in a while.
11
00:02:33,741 --> 00:02:34,871
Close that gap up a little bit.
12
00:02:34,875 --> 00:02:36,305
Don't start on me.
13
00:02:38,878 --> 00:02:40,778
Is Sherry okay?
She ain't been in.
14
00:02:43,181 --> 00:02:44,711
Everything good with her?
15
00:02:44,715 --> 00:02:47,245
A squabble.
She's back home.
16
00:02:48,484 --> 00:02:50,484
Oh, hey, Mark.
Hi.
17
00:02:51,920 --> 00:02:53,220
Well...
18
00:02:55,423 --> 00:02:57,163
Mark?
Yeah?
19
00:02:58,192 --> 00:02:59,362
You still doing it?
20
00:02:59,692 --> 00:03:00,892
No, I stopped.
21
00:03:02,794 --> 00:03:05,464
Pop, they only give me an
hour for lunch, so I gotta...
22
00:03:05,763 --> 00:03:07,233
I'll see you next time.
23
00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:14,740
Hey, he's a vet, okay. What do you
say you keep an eye on him for me?
24
00:03:15,304 --> 00:03:16,641
Oh, no, you don't have to.
25
00:03:16,642 --> 00:03:18,638
Just take it. In case
he needs anything.
26
00:03:18,640 --> 00:03:20,910
Hey, I got him, my man.
I got him.
27
00:03:20,911 --> 00:03:22,238
I appreciate it.
28
00:03:26,813 --> 00:03:27,883
Sports Facts.
29
00:03:27,884 --> 00:03:29,880
Yeah, 54012, Princess Leia.
30
00:03:29,882 --> 00:03:31,782
Go 54012.
31
00:03:32,350 --> 00:03:33,650
I want Marshall for five dimes.
32
00:03:33,651 --> 00:03:34,621
The line is down to 10.
33
00:03:34,622 --> 00:03:38,518
I don't care if it's down to seven.
Marshall plus the points is a gift.
34
00:03:38,521 --> 00:03:40,851
One play on this call?
Yeah.
35
00:03:42,591 --> 00:03:43,721
Yeah.
36
00:04:04,679 --> 00:04:06,249
The Thundering Herd.
37
00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:08,748
Go Marshall.
38
00:04:10,317 --> 00:04:11,447
Please.
39
00:04:12,351 --> 00:04:13,481
Please.
40
00:04:26,431 --> 00:04:28,431
Me, I'd forget
the one with the scanner.
41
00:04:28,433 --> 00:04:29,703
Everything you need is
on the net anyway.
42
00:04:29,704 --> 00:04:33,769
Like you're actually going to check out
a library book and scan it, right?
43
00:04:33,770 --> 00:04:34,500
Right.
44
00:04:34,504 --> 00:04:37,442
You're gonna print, you know.
Maybe make the odd copies.
45
00:04:37,443 --> 00:04:39,310
Doesn't hurt to have
the fax function.
46
00:04:39,408 --> 00:04:40,708
Just the fax, ma'am.
47
00:04:42,877 --> 00:04:45,977
You know what, I'm gonna
show you something.
48
00:04:47,414 --> 00:04:48,454
Forget that other merch, okay?
49
00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:52,648
It's their ticket to a pure profit stream,
overcharge you on the replacement cartridges.
50
00:04:52,652 --> 00:04:56,752
This one is cheaper out the door, and
you can refill the ink yourself.
51
00:04:57,356 --> 00:04:58,516
Thanks.
Yeah.
52
00:04:59,023 --> 00:05:00,923
We don't make
anything off that one.
53
00:05:00,924 --> 00:05:03,424
Take a microscopic margin.
54
00:05:03,426 --> 00:05:04,556
Okay.
55
00:05:09,264 --> 00:05:10,504
Wait.
56
00:05:12,867 --> 00:05:15,427
I want to get you my
employee discount.
57
00:05:15,436 --> 00:05:16,936
20% is 20%, right?
58
00:05:16,937 --> 00:05:18,567
Yeah.
59
00:05:18,571 --> 00:05:20,971
♪ Way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah
60
00:05:20,973 --> 00:05:24,573
♪ My way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah
61
00:05:24,576 --> 00:05:27,476
♪ Way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, my
62
00:05:27,478 --> 00:05:29,878
♪ Way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah
63
00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:32,848
♪ Which way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah
64
00:05:32,849 --> 00:05:35,049
♪ My way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
65
00:05:35,051 --> 00:05:38,351
What the hell's
going on here, huh?
66
00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:41,022
Yeah.
67
00:05:41,456 --> 00:05:43,656
Sorry, Stan, we were just...
Goofing off
68
00:05:43,658 --> 00:05:45,318
and costing me money.
You think I can't see that?
69
00:05:45,326 --> 00:05:48,486
Well, not to put too fine a point on it,
but wouldn't it be Pete Coors' money?
70
00:05:48,495 --> 00:05:51,455
If that truck isn't cross-checked
and rolling in five minutes,
71
00:05:51,464 --> 00:05:53,504
you don't work here anymore.
72
00:05:53,599 --> 00:05:54,329
Roger that.
73
00:05:54,333 --> 00:05:57,573
And Juan Valdez
is, you know, up in the hills going,
74
00:05:57,574 --> 00:06:00,369
"Don't sue me,
if you burn yourself."
75
00:06:00,971 --> 00:06:01,671
Right?
76
00:06:01,672 --> 00:06:06,441
But, you know, the thing that kills me is
that they invented a whole new business.
77
00:06:06,442 --> 00:06:08,342
You know,
$3 for a cup of coffee.
78
00:06:08,343 --> 00:06:10,713
I don't remember anybody saying,
"Hey, this coffee sure tastes great,
79
00:06:10,714 --> 00:06:13,952
"but I'd rather say grande
and pay $3 for it."
80
00:06:14,982 --> 00:06:16,382
You talk a lot.
81
00:06:17,851 --> 00:06:19,521
But you're cute.
82
00:06:30,429 --> 00:06:32,399
Got two more
hang-ups today.
83
00:06:32,964 --> 00:06:35,404
It's starting to give me the creeps.
I'm on it.
84
00:06:36,867 --> 00:06:39,567
What are you doing there? Stuff.
85
00:06:39,569 --> 00:06:41,669
Need help?
I'm good. I got it.
86
00:06:43,039 --> 00:06:44,939
Are you gonna tuck Hayden in?
87
00:06:50,946 --> 00:06:53,546
Hey, buddy, what's up?
88
00:06:54,549 --> 00:06:55,779
Good.
89
00:06:56,817 --> 00:06:58,517
Doesn't sound like it.
90
00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:00,121
Hey, uh...
91
00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:02,820
I thought we were partners.
92
00:07:02,821 --> 00:07:04,051
We are.
93
00:07:04,055 --> 00:07:06,585
So, we share Intel, right?
94
00:07:06,590 --> 00:07:08,090
Right.
Well?
95
00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:09,788
Mommy's worried.
96
00:07:09,792 --> 00:07:12,862
Of course,
she's worried. Mommies worry.
97
00:07:14,028 --> 00:07:15,758
What do you mean,
Mommy's worried?
98
00:07:15,763 --> 00:07:17,930
About the football games.
99
00:07:17,931 --> 00:07:19,731
Well, Mommy's a fan.
100
00:07:20,099 --> 00:07:24,499
Mommy doesn't care who wins
but she knows you do.
101
00:07:31,109 --> 00:07:32,739
I won't be late.
102
00:07:36,913 --> 00:07:40,682
I just keep getting better. You wouldn't
think it was possible, but there it is.
103
00:07:40,683 --> 00:07:43,683
Did he foot fault? I don't
need to cheat with you clowns.
104
00:07:43,686 --> 00:07:45,586
I don't know, gonna want
to check the video.
105
00:07:45,587 --> 00:07:47,817
Oh, do I detect a hint
of athletic envy?
106
00:07:47,822 --> 00:07:50,592
Of you? Not
in this lifetime, baby.
107
00:07:50,593 --> 00:07:54,491
Face it. You guys cannot stand the
fact that there's finally a sport
108
00:07:54,494 --> 00:07:55,694
that I'm better than you at.
109
00:07:55,695 --> 00:07:57,625
Hold it.
Darts is not a sport.
110
00:07:57,630 --> 00:07:59,800
Of course it's a sport,
numb-nuts, it's on ESPN.
111
00:07:59,801 --> 00:08:01,528
So is poker, big deal.
112
00:08:01,533 --> 00:08:02,903
Darts is an activity.
113
00:08:02,904 --> 00:08:04,131
A game, at best.
114
00:08:04,135 --> 00:08:05,165
A game, huh?
How do you figure?
115
00:08:05,169 --> 00:08:10,469
Simple, anything you can drink beer and get
better at, by definition isn't a sport.
116
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:13,941
Football, hockey,
baseball, sports.
117
00:08:13,943 --> 00:08:17,011
Bowling, pool,
darts, activities.
118
00:08:17,012 --> 00:08:18,879
What about golf?
Activity.
119
00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:19,880
Waste of time.
It's a sport.
120
00:08:19,881 --> 00:08:23,850
No. If they made them carry their
own bag and run to the ball, maybe.
121
00:08:23,851 --> 00:08:25,651
But it's strictly a game.
122
00:08:26,653 --> 00:08:28,053
Talking about
the Championship Bowl?
123
00:08:28,054 --> 00:08:29,554
Yeah.
Who do you like?
124
00:08:29,555 --> 00:08:31,085
The dog, Marshall.
The underdog, really?
125
00:08:31,089 --> 00:08:33,889
Yeah, whenever you don't know you
take the dog and the points.
126
00:08:33,891 --> 00:08:34,891
No kidding.
Absolutely.
127
00:08:34,892 --> 00:08:36,730
There's four possible
outcomes in any contest.
128
00:08:36,731 --> 00:08:38,857
Favorite wins a blowout.
Favorite wins in a squeaker.
129
00:08:38,862 --> 00:08:40,602
Dog wins a blowout.
Dog wins in a squeaker.
130
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:43,557
Three out of four scenarios you win
if you take the dog and the points.
131
00:08:43,566 --> 00:08:44,726
Spend any time
thinking about this?
132
00:08:44,733 --> 00:08:47,771
Big game is Saturday, who do
we like, Texas or Marshall?
133
00:08:47,772 --> 00:08:50,699
Texas is a walk. The game is
over by halftime I'd say...
134
00:08:50,705 --> 00:08:54,905
Ah, I'd hate to agree with the Spider-Man,
but this one is a mismatch for the ages.
135
00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:58,179
All right, Dibs, we haven't heard from you.
I don't like football.
136
00:08:58,180 --> 00:08:59,678
You gotta pick, Dibs.
137
00:08:59,679 --> 00:09:03,648
All right, if I have to, Texas. You
don't need to be a brain surgeon.
138
00:09:03,649 --> 00:09:05,149
Goliath is gonna win
this one going away.
139
00:09:05,150 --> 00:09:07,520
Anybody who picks
Marshall is nuts.
140
00:09:07,521 --> 00:09:09,788
All right, it's unanimous.
Texas blows them out.
141
00:09:09,789 --> 00:09:11,517
Those guys don't know anything.
142
00:09:12,789 --> 00:09:15,789
Charlie starts building
prow ends for the pontoons,
143
00:09:15,792 --> 00:09:18,160
when he discovers another use...
144
00:09:18,161 --> 00:09:19,931
Hey, babe.
Hi.
145
00:09:22,698 --> 00:09:23,828
Ta-da!
146
00:09:26,167 --> 00:09:27,927
Very thoughtful.
147
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:32,571
You smell like smoke.
148
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,172
That's 'cause I'm smokin'!
149
00:09:37,343 --> 00:09:39,977
Who is this jerkoff?
He's always on.
150
00:09:39,978 --> 00:09:41,238
He fixes things.
151
00:09:42,112 --> 00:09:43,981
I can fix stuff too, you know.
152
00:09:43,982 --> 00:09:45,780
Yeah, I know you can, honey.
153
00:09:47,716 --> 00:09:50,276
Do you have anything
needing repair, ma'am?
154
00:09:50,285 --> 00:09:52,015
I'm all tuned up.
Thank you very much.
155
00:09:52,020 --> 00:09:54,020
Maybe I should start
under the hood.
156
00:09:59,126 --> 00:10:02,586
♪ Beer, beer, beer
Get your humble hydrate here
157
00:10:02,596 --> 00:10:06,726
♪ Da, da
Uh, uh, uh
158
00:10:09,669 --> 00:10:10,929
♪ Uh, uh
159
00:10:10,936 --> 00:10:14,296
♪ Beer, beer, beer
You know that's why I'm here
160
00:10:14,306 --> 00:10:17,206
♪ Beer, beer, beer... ♪
161
00:10:21,811 --> 00:10:25,681
Gentlemen, puts your
hands together for Tiffany!
162
00:10:40,695 --> 00:10:41,825
New move?
163
00:10:42,196 --> 00:10:45,256
If she's got another
concussion, she's fired.
164
00:10:45,265 --> 00:10:48,925
Somebody clean that up.
Pick up the chairs.
165
00:10:48,935 --> 00:10:51,695
Don't worry about her.
Get the chairs first.
166
00:10:52,805 --> 00:10:54,935
Hey, Billy.
Scarlet.
167
00:10:55,674 --> 00:10:59,677
You work too hard. Says
the princess of the pole.
168
00:10:59,678 --> 00:11:01,278
What is that supposed to mean?
169
00:11:01,279 --> 00:11:05,109
Well, do you not fling yourself
through the air like a sexy gazelle?
170
00:11:06,884 --> 00:11:08,824
How come you never let
me dance for you?
171
00:11:08,825 --> 00:11:10,119
'Cause I'm married.
172
00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:11,150
Married guys are my specialty.
173
00:11:11,154 --> 00:11:15,164
I did one right thing in my life, Scarlet,
and the price, no snacks on the side.
174
00:11:15,165 --> 00:11:18,828
Snack, my butt.
You'd never eat at home again.
175
00:11:19,728 --> 00:11:21,088
Maybe so.
176
00:11:21,796 --> 00:11:22,996
Suit yourself.
177
00:11:24,098 --> 00:11:25,798
Swing by if you
change your mind.
178
00:11:30,970 --> 00:11:32,840
See you next week, Scarlet.
179
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:37,340
Okay, when everyone's
quiet, we can do this.
180
00:11:37,341 --> 00:11:40,011
- Watch me win this raffle.
- These tickets are mine.
181
00:11:41,011 --> 00:11:42,380
Funny, if you're five.
182
00:11:42,381 --> 00:11:45,909
Is it just tickets to the Championship
Bowl or do you get some parties too?
183
00:11:45,915 --> 00:11:48,715
Yeah, there's a party in your
mouth and everybody's coming.
184
00:11:48,717 --> 00:11:51,317
It's nice to have
so many first-graders here.
185
00:11:51,319 --> 00:11:52,749
And the winner is...
186
00:11:53,153 --> 00:11:54,419
Jason Klein.
187
00:11:54,420 --> 00:11:55,720
Ugh!
188
00:11:56,254 --> 00:11:58,824
Wow. I never
win anything.
189
00:12:01,425 --> 00:12:02,755
Have fun.
190
00:12:03,860 --> 00:12:05,930
Thanks.
191
00:12:05,931 --> 00:12:09,328
Wow, this is great.
Um, I want to thank...
192
00:12:09,698 --> 00:12:10,828
You suck.
193
00:12:26,848 --> 00:12:27,348
Florida? No.
194
00:12:27,349 --> 00:12:30,717
Look, you're a nice enough guy and all,
but that's it. Go to Florida with you?
195
00:12:30,718 --> 00:12:34,087
We were so good together at coffee. We
both like two sugars and a NutraSweet...
196
00:12:34,088 --> 00:12:37,757
For Christ's sake, Jade, I've got
a full waiting room. Let's go.
197
00:12:37,758 --> 00:12:38,888
Yes, Doctor.
198
00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:40,222
Does anyone work here?
199
00:12:40,226 --> 00:12:42,856
This is what I get for
having a latte with a loser.
200
00:12:42,861 --> 00:12:44,461
So you gonna think about it?
201
00:12:44,462 --> 00:12:45,962
I said no, are you deaf?
202
00:12:45,963 --> 00:12:48,833
Take your tickets and your
NutraSweet and get out of here.
203
00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:50,002
This is my job.
204
00:12:55,336 --> 00:12:56,866
So you understand why I'm here.
205
00:12:56,870 --> 00:13:00,470
Daddy had the Jets. That's right.
And the Jets lost.
206
00:13:00,473 --> 00:13:01,840
I know.
207
00:13:01,841 --> 00:13:03,411
And that wasn't the only one.
208
00:13:04,510 --> 00:13:05,810
Daddy.
209
00:13:05,811 --> 00:13:07,011
Hello, Mark.
210
00:13:07,212 --> 00:13:08,112
What are you doing here?
211
00:13:08,113 --> 00:13:12,451
How is it that this little man understands
so much more clearly than his deadbeat dad?
212
00:13:12,452 --> 00:13:14,149
Hayden, get in the kitchen.
213
00:13:14,450 --> 00:13:15,520
Now!
214
00:13:19,854 --> 00:13:21,394
You've got some nerve.
215
00:13:21,395 --> 00:13:23,088
Just doing my job.
216
00:13:23,089 --> 00:13:23,519
Now pay up.
217
00:13:23,522 --> 00:13:27,060
You come into my house. You scare my wife.
You touch my kid.
218
00:13:27,061 --> 00:13:28,158
I'm not paying for that.
219
00:13:28,159 --> 00:13:31,459
I go where I'm sent and I get what I'm
sent for. Now what do you have for me?
220
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:32,792
I'll show you what I got.
221
00:13:32,796 --> 00:13:34,096
We can do this either way.
222
00:13:34,831 --> 00:13:36,061
You got some balls.
223
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:38,325
True, but enough about me.
224
00:13:38,333 --> 00:13:40,067
Mark.
Not now.
225
00:13:40,068 --> 00:13:42,498
You will come across. You
know I don't leave otherwise.
226
00:13:42,503 --> 00:13:43,843
- Oh, yeah?
- Mark.
227
00:13:43,844 --> 00:13:45,867
What?
Your dad died.
228
00:13:50,543 --> 00:13:51,843
Hmm.
229
00:13:58,817 --> 00:14:00,017
Be seeing you.
230
00:14:15,298 --> 00:14:16,558
Hey, Jason.
231
00:14:16,565 --> 00:14:18,195
Hey. Hi. Come on in.
232
00:14:21,869 --> 00:14:25,338
Thirty-seven years
I knew him. He was a good man.
233
00:14:25,339 --> 00:14:28,239
112, high average, not bad.
234
00:14:28,241 --> 00:14:29,410
Well he did love to bowl.
235
00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:34,808
What the hell happened to you, kid? We all
expected you to be doing big things by now.
236
00:14:35,313 --> 00:14:36,946
Was it the divorce?
237
00:14:36,947 --> 00:14:40,347
Your old man always blamed himself
for knocking you off track...
238
00:14:40,350 --> 00:14:44,150
Hey, thanks for coming, Mr. Dean.
It really means a lot.
239
00:14:44,153 --> 00:14:45,887
Let's top you off there.
240
00:14:45,888 --> 00:14:47,388
Is there any wine?
For sure.
241
00:14:50,125 --> 00:14:51,485
That's appropriate.
242
00:14:51,493 --> 00:14:52,926
What?
243
00:14:52,927 --> 00:14:55,927
Well you're the one who decided
to wear your ass as an outfit.
244
00:14:57,297 --> 00:14:58,827
Whatever.
245
00:15:03,834 --> 00:15:05,604
Yeah, I'm here to clean
out my dad's locker.
246
00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:07,572
Sure, kid.
Number 64.
247
00:15:24,086 --> 00:15:27,446
Sorry to hear about your pop, kid.
Straight shooter.
248
00:16:01,590 --> 00:16:03,190
Oh, Dad.
249
00:16:28,148 --> 00:16:30,048
Hey, Sherry, what's this?
250
00:16:30,049 --> 00:16:31,649
We're going to my mom's again.
251
00:16:32,517 --> 00:16:34,277
Don't call for a few days, okay?
252
00:16:34,285 --> 00:16:36,385
No, of course it's not okay.
253
00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:37,650
What are you doing?
254
00:16:37,654 --> 00:16:40,194
Don't act surprised.
You did this.
255
00:16:42,524 --> 00:16:43,664
Look,
256
00:16:44,558 --> 00:16:48,158
I don't like the timing,
but you put us at risk.
257
00:16:48,161 --> 00:16:49,031
He's my son.
258
00:16:49,032 --> 00:16:51,258
I'm not going to keep
your son from you.
259
00:16:51,630 --> 00:16:53,060
Bye, Daddy.
260
00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:55,661
This was the last straw.
261
00:17:06,476 --> 00:17:10,006
I'm just saying it takes time to lug five
pallets of empties down two flights.
262
00:17:10,012 --> 00:17:12,450
No, McGriff,
you are not getting off early.
263
00:17:12,451 --> 00:17:15,407
I need you back here at base.
Truck 18 is loaded ass-backwards,
264
00:17:15,416 --> 00:17:18,016
all the long-necks are in front.
Get back here.
265
00:17:18,018 --> 00:17:19,618
It's not my bad, Donnie.
266
00:17:19,619 --> 00:17:22,289
I'm knocking off early today.
267
00:17:24,156 --> 00:17:26,556
Big plans.
268
00:17:42,470 --> 00:17:44,000
Jesus!
269
00:17:49,075 --> 00:17:51,035
How did I get here?
270
00:17:52,244 --> 00:17:53,714
Hiding out in my own house.
271
00:17:55,647 --> 00:17:59,647
You remember, coming out of
high school, we were stars.
272
00:18:00,485 --> 00:18:02,275
Well, you were.
273
00:18:03,120 --> 00:18:04,550
You gotta be kidding me.
274
00:18:05,288 --> 00:18:07,148
You were fast-tracked,
275
00:18:07,156 --> 00:18:08,656
4.0 pre-law at Penn.
276
00:18:08,657 --> 00:18:12,227
I had my football ride,
granted it was Division ♪.
277
00:18:12,994 --> 00:18:15,534
How many guys even
get to play college ball?
278
00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:17,596
Not many.
279
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:19,404
And not quarterback.
280
00:18:20,533 --> 00:18:21,633
Yeah.
281
00:18:43,221 --> 00:18:44,491
Hey, baby.
282
00:18:47,624 --> 00:18:48,694
No way.
283
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:52,859
Aren't you Billy McGriff
of the McGriffters?
284
00:18:53,294 --> 00:18:55,161
Oh, you guys were awesome.
285
00:18:55,162 --> 00:18:58,500
I was there at Toad's Hole that night
that Joe Strummer jumped up on stage
286
00:18:58,501 --> 00:19:00,558
and started cranking out
that song.
287
00:19:02,601 --> 00:19:04,631
♪ Which way, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah
288
00:19:04,636 --> 00:19:07,596
♪ My way, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
289
00:19:07,605 --> 00:19:11,465
Yeah, man, that was the one.
You had it going on.
290
00:19:11,741 --> 00:19:14,711
You're such a fan. Shouldn't
I be banging your wife?
291
00:19:14,910 --> 00:19:16,440
She's your wife?
292
00:19:17,745 --> 00:19:20,745
Geez, I had no idea.
293
00:19:35,896 --> 00:19:38,856
Give me a triple kamikaze,
with two beers back.
294
00:19:38,865 --> 00:19:40,295
And whatever they're having.
295
00:19:42,834 --> 00:19:44,834
So I'm guessing
you're off the wagon.
296
00:19:46,536 --> 00:19:49,436
Of all the guys in the world,
she chooses that nitwit.
297
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:52,368
I mean, come on. You're gonna cheat,
pick somebody better than that.
298
00:19:52,374 --> 00:19:54,942
Till death do us part, period.
Fact.
299
00:19:54,943 --> 00:19:57,477
Well, I'd like to
make a suggestion.
300
00:19:57,478 --> 00:19:59,538
What do you say to
a little adventure?
301
00:19:59,546 --> 00:20:02,876
Shed some layers.
Fun, sun... Anyone?
302
00:20:02,882 --> 00:20:03,582
Pass.
303
00:20:03,583 --> 00:20:05,882
It'd be good to get away for a while.
Therapeutic.
304
00:20:05,884 --> 00:20:07,618
I'm not running.
I am.
305
00:20:07,619 --> 00:20:09,586
Where are you thinking?
306
00:20:09,587 --> 00:20:13,387
Into every rain,
a little sun must fall.
307
00:20:13,390 --> 00:20:15,760
Championship Bowl,
how'd you get these?
308
00:20:15,761 --> 00:20:19,289
The one and only OfficeMax
Christmas drawing extravaganza.
309
00:20:19,295 --> 00:20:20,755
What do you know?
310
00:20:20,763 --> 00:20:21,933
I got five...
311
00:20:22,764 --> 00:20:26,700
I made a little bet.
You know, on Marshall.
312
00:20:26,701 --> 00:20:29,401
You know, just so I can watch the
game and have a rooting interest.
313
00:20:29,403 --> 00:20:32,843
What did you bet? Just a
friendly wager, you know.
314
00:20:32,844 --> 00:20:34,739
Thundering Herd, 50 bones.
315
00:20:34,906 --> 00:20:37,706
Hmm, these are tremendous.
316
00:20:37,708 --> 00:20:40,708
Okay, don't get any ideas. I am
definitely sitting in one of those seats.
317
00:20:40,711 --> 00:20:44,246
You'll be very comfortable in the car.
Game's better on the radio.
318
00:20:44,247 --> 00:20:45,247
Yeah, you get Keith Jackson.
319
00:20:45,248 --> 00:20:47,648
"As another lovely Florida day
drifts into the gloaming..."
320
00:20:47,650 --> 00:20:50,250
Keith Jackson's on TV.
Sometimes he does the radio.
321
00:20:50,252 --> 00:20:51,722
Or you get Marv Albert.
Yes!
322
00:20:51,723 --> 00:20:54,288
No. No, I'm no dummy.
323
00:20:54,289 --> 00:20:55,389
Nobody said you were.
324
00:20:55,390 --> 00:20:57,320
You may recall, I graduated
first in our class.
325
00:20:57,325 --> 00:20:59,585
I remember. You put the
"dick" in valedictorian.
326
00:20:59,593 --> 00:21:03,233
This game is on Saturday. If we're
going, we better get underway.
327
00:21:03,329 --> 00:21:04,589
Pronto.
328
00:21:06,230 --> 00:21:07,360
Cheers.
329
00:21:07,897 --> 00:21:09,257
Florida.
330
00:21:09,798 --> 00:21:12,828
I want to be clear on this.
I get to use one of those tickets.
331
00:21:12,834 --> 00:21:14,603
I won them,
and I get to use one.
332
00:21:14,604 --> 00:21:16,502
You two can figure out
who sits with me,
333
00:21:16,503 --> 00:21:19,803
and we'll scalp another
single for whoever loses.
334
00:21:19,806 --> 00:21:23,236
Why should you be automatic? It
was a random draw, was it not?
335
00:21:23,242 --> 00:21:24,542
Yeah, come on. It's not
like you earned them.
336
00:21:24,543 --> 00:21:26,012
Just let me get my guitar.
337
00:21:26,013 --> 00:21:27,880
We got the radio.
We got CDs.
338
00:21:27,881 --> 00:21:30,349
There's always
room for live tunes.
339
00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:35,853
No way I can stomach
1,000 miles of his light FM.
340
00:21:35,854 --> 00:21:37,319
What happened to him, anyway?
341
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:38,520
Why did he go all
sensitive-acoustic?
342
00:21:38,521 --> 00:21:40,751
I don't know. Maybe he can
play his way out of it.
343
00:21:40,756 --> 00:21:43,556
These tunes
he's singing now, yuck.
344
00:21:43,558 --> 00:21:45,718
It's like he's got
Music-Heimer's or something.
345
00:21:45,726 --> 00:21:47,456
He's trying to stretch.
Have a range.
346
00:21:47,461 --> 00:21:49,891
Well, I like it
electric and loud.
347
00:21:49,896 --> 00:21:53,556
Whatever was rock and roll
about him is long gone.
348
00:21:54,266 --> 00:21:55,296
Museum gone.
349
00:22:12,950 --> 00:22:15,750
I should've banged your
sister when I had the chance.
350
00:22:24,494 --> 00:22:26,694
We are not gonna make Florida
on one case of beer.
351
00:22:26,696 --> 00:22:27,956
I can tell you that right now.
352
00:22:29,431 --> 00:22:30,931
Here we go.
353
00:22:31,432 --> 00:22:34,767
27, 28, 29, and one is 30.
354
00:22:34,768 --> 00:22:37,468
Give me a scratch ticket,
and make it a winner.
355
00:22:37,470 --> 00:22:38,740
We're going to Florida.
356
00:22:39,070 --> 00:22:39,900
$1.
357
00:22:39,904 --> 00:22:41,744
Have you got any halva,
for the trip?
358
00:22:41,839 --> 00:22:43,706
Halva?
When in Rome.
359
00:22:43,707 --> 00:22:44,907
This is Pennsylvania.
360
00:22:44,908 --> 00:22:46,308
85 cents.
361
00:22:47,076 --> 00:22:49,836
Hey, guys. I won.
362
00:22:49,845 --> 00:22:51,405
5 bucks, it only cost
me a buck. I'm up 4.
363
00:22:51,413 --> 00:22:54,353
That ought to cover a couple of tolls.
That a boy.
364
00:22:55,683 --> 00:22:56,453
Give me six numbers.
365
00:22:56,454 --> 00:22:59,920
Let me do it. I'm on a roll.
I'm seeing...
366
00:23:01,054 --> 00:23:02,454
Quick pick.
367
00:23:02,455 --> 00:23:04,315
Okay, that's a loser.
What do you got?
368
00:23:04,323 --> 00:23:08,592
6, 11 and 56. June 11, 1956,
Joe Montana's birthday.
369
00:23:08,593 --> 00:23:11,793
Pennsylvania boy and the greatest
quarterback in history for a little yin
370
00:23:11,796 --> 00:23:15,626
and if you want to go ultimate yang,
we're going with the Boston Red Sox:
371
00:23:15,633 --> 00:23:18,501
10, 25, 86, October 25, 1986.
372
00:23:18,502 --> 00:23:21,402
Billy Buckner's grounder
Game 6, World Series.
373
00:23:21,404 --> 00:23:22,674
You're thinking the whole
yin-yang package.
374
00:23:22,675 --> 00:23:24,340
You're feeling me,
aren't you, Billy?
375
00:23:24,341 --> 00:23:26,369
86 is too high.
It's gotta be 60 or less.
376
00:23:26,374 --> 00:23:30,344
That's okay. We go 10, 25,
and let's say... - 57.
377
00:23:31,745 --> 00:23:32,675
Heinz 57.
378
00:23:32,679 --> 00:23:35,879
You just went from Joe
Montana to steak sauce.
379
00:23:35,882 --> 00:23:38,052
Yeah.
No, no, no. I like it.
380
00:23:38,350 --> 00:23:39,416
Run it, Abdul.
381
00:23:39,417 --> 00:23:40,777
My name is not Abdul.
382
00:23:51,093 --> 00:23:52,626
What if we get a flat?
383
00:23:52,627 --> 00:23:53,987
That's defeatist.
384
00:23:58,099 --> 00:24:01,629
Come on, guys. Just let me
hold them till we get to Florida.
385
00:24:01,635 --> 00:24:02,895
You can be shotgun.
386
00:24:02,902 --> 00:24:03,872
I'm already shotgun.
387
00:24:03,873 --> 00:24:05,969
And I'd like to hold my tickets.
388
00:24:06,071 --> 00:24:07,101
Relax, you will.
389
00:24:07,105 --> 00:24:10,105
That's right. We are still waiting for the
food to show up for the Labor Day picnic.
390
00:24:10,108 --> 00:24:11,368
That wasn't my fault.
391
00:24:11,375 --> 00:24:12,435
But it was your responsibility.
392
00:24:12,442 --> 00:24:15,542
That's great. Focus.
Shotgun is no joke.
393
00:24:15,545 --> 00:24:17,575
Keep this map safe
and dry at all times.
394
00:24:17,580 --> 00:24:20,710
And no snoozing. There is nothing
worse than shotgun sawing wood.
395
00:24:20,716 --> 00:24:23,376
What about the radio? Doesn't
shotgun handle music?
396
00:24:23,385 --> 00:24:24,545
We'll see how it goes.
397
00:24:24,552 --> 00:24:25,522
You gotta earn those stripes.
398
00:24:25,523 --> 00:24:29,688
Okay, ship's going down, Titanic, whatever.
You got one life ring.
399
00:24:29,689 --> 00:24:31,858
Who are you throwing it to,
your wife or your kid?
400
00:24:31,859 --> 00:24:34,087
She won't like it,
but it's gotta be the kid.
401
00:24:34,092 --> 00:24:35,622
Gotta be the kid.
402
00:24:36,927 --> 00:24:38,157
Okay, I got one.
403
00:24:39,729 --> 00:24:44,869
What would you rather lose,
your eyesight or your penis?
404
00:24:48,871 --> 00:24:50,601
Is this my cock or your cock?
405
00:24:50,606 --> 00:24:51,496
Here we go.
406
00:24:51,506 --> 00:24:52,606
'Cause my cock,
that's one thing...
407
00:24:52,607 --> 00:24:55,407
I'm not comfortable with that
kind of talk in the Fury.
408
00:24:56,009 --> 00:24:59,039
My mother insisted on
giving me a bath till I was 12.
409
00:24:59,045 --> 00:25:01,605
- Scrubbed my ears, the whole deal.
- Twelve?
410
00:25:01,614 --> 00:25:02,952
That's sick, why did
you stand for it?
411
00:25:02,953 --> 00:25:05,193
I didn't know any better. She
was the only mother around.
412
00:25:06,417 --> 00:25:08,447
Drew the line
when pubes sprouted.
413
00:25:08,452 --> 00:25:08,882
Okay, uncle.
414
00:25:08,885 --> 00:25:11,915
No disrespect, but I always thought
your mother was a whack job.
415
00:25:11,921 --> 00:25:13,988
Ditto.
Hey, that's my mother.
416
00:25:13,989 --> 00:25:15,589
You can't talk that way
about somebody's mother.
417
00:25:15,590 --> 00:25:16,890
If I knew you a week less,
I'd have to hit you.
418
00:25:16,891 --> 00:25:19,561
You brought her up. Yeah,
we're just trying to be supportive
419
00:25:19,562 --> 00:25:21,727
like good friends are supposed to be.
Oh, thank you.
420
00:25:21,728 --> 00:25:24,658
By the way, just let me hold the tickets.
I'm not comfortable with this setup.
421
00:25:24,664 --> 00:25:27,904
I don't know. You two never
give me any responsibility.
422
00:25:27,905 --> 00:25:29,030
Two words...
423
00:25:29,034 --> 00:25:30,634
Labor Day party.
424
00:25:30,635 --> 00:25:32,695
That was 14 years ago.
425
00:25:32,703 --> 00:25:34,837
We suffered the whole day.
Oh!
426
00:25:34,838 --> 00:25:37,738
All right, I tell you what.
We'll go Switzerland.
427
00:25:37,740 --> 00:25:38,610
What?
428
00:25:38,611 --> 00:25:41,167
Switzerland, neutral spot.
429
00:25:41,176 --> 00:25:44,136
Put them in the glove compartment.
We'll sort it out later.
430
00:25:44,945 --> 00:25:46,605
Okay. So, we have
an understanding.
431
00:25:46,613 --> 00:25:49,153
I get a say in who
ultimately gets to use these.
432
00:25:49,154 --> 00:25:50,608
Agreed?
433
00:25:52,585 --> 00:25:55,615
Oh, oh! Turn this up.
Dire Straits. Awesome.
434
00:25:55,621 --> 00:25:57,890
Man, back in the day
these guys were the kings.
435
00:25:57,891 --> 00:26:00,259
Hundred million albums,
you heard them everywhere.
436
00:26:00,260 --> 00:26:03,058
You turn on the radio now, it's
all boy bands and Britney.
437
00:26:03,060 --> 00:26:03,960
I'd throw one in her.
438
00:26:03,961 --> 00:26:07,030
Nice of you. The point is,
they went from the top,
439
00:26:07,031 --> 00:26:09,897
the very top, to nowhere or...
440
00:26:09,898 --> 00:26:12,098
I don't know, back to some
castle in England.
441
00:26:12,100 --> 00:26:13,300
They're not clipping
any coupons.
442
00:26:13,301 --> 00:26:15,001
Yeah, or carrying
their own luggage.
443
00:26:15,002 --> 00:26:17,572
Except for the bags
that are filled with cash.
444
00:26:18,071 --> 00:26:21,041
I guess their time has passed.
445
00:26:21,042 --> 00:26:22,640
It's Scrudge. Skip it.
Wait a second.
446
00:26:22,641 --> 00:26:25,011
- Turn it down. Scrudge.
- Scrunge?
447
00:26:25,012 --> 00:26:26,010
No. Scrudge.
448
00:26:26,011 --> 00:26:28,711
That song is not Scrudge.
It's a change of mood.
449
00:26:28,713 --> 00:26:29,879
The funkiest of Scrudge.
450
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:30,710
What is Scrudge?
451
00:26:30,714 --> 00:26:32,748
Scrudge, a song
that follows a great song.
452
00:26:32,749 --> 00:26:34,219
Doomed from the first time
you hear it on the CD.
453
00:26:34,220 --> 00:26:37,617
We're talking about Dire Straits here.
They're incapable of Scrudge.
454
00:26:37,620 --> 00:26:38,750
Dead in the recording studio.
455
00:26:38,754 --> 00:26:41,861
You see, every group knows immediately
when they got a great song.
456
00:26:41,862 --> 00:26:45,187
And they don't want to burn a perfectly
decent one by putting it after that.
457
00:26:45,193 --> 00:26:46,830
So they pick a shit
song for that slot.
458
00:26:46,831 --> 00:26:49,687
You know, to fall on the
grenade, take one for the team.
459
00:26:49,696 --> 00:26:50,856
A Scrudge song.
460
00:26:50,863 --> 00:26:51,703
Give me an example.
461
00:26:51,704 --> 00:26:56,027
Okay. Do you remember the song
that followed, uh... Free-bird?
462
00:26:56,034 --> 00:26:57,100
Um, no.
463
00:26:57,101 --> 00:26:58,631
Exactly.
464
00:26:58,635 --> 00:27:00,295
Brown Sugar?
I don't know.
465
00:27:00,303 --> 00:27:02,341
Born to Run?
Hey, back off Bruce.
466
00:27:02,342 --> 00:27:05,638
Oh, so you can cap Knopfler
but Springsteen's off-limits?
467
00:27:05,641 --> 00:27:07,111
Good Christ, She's the One.
468
00:27:07,112 --> 00:27:08,609
Talk about Scrudge.
469
00:27:08,876 --> 00:27:10,706
- Stairway?
- Uh...
470
00:27:10,711 --> 00:27:11,841
Where the Streets Have No Name?
471
00:27:11,845 --> 00:27:14,205
Bullet the Blue Sky
is not Scrudge. It's sonic.
472
00:27:14,214 --> 00:27:17,924
Any reasonable debate, by
definition, means non-Scrudge.
473
00:27:17,925 --> 00:27:19,717
Flip it back to three.
474
00:27:24,188 --> 00:27:25,648
Sing it, Jase!
475
00:27:35,398 --> 00:27:36,998
I could do this all night!
476
00:28:01,185 --> 00:28:03,285
Watch out!
Jesus!
477
00:28:03,287 --> 00:28:05,287
Oh! Watch the road!
478
00:28:05,289 --> 00:28:07,419
I was out like a light.
479
00:28:07,424 --> 00:28:08,824
Who farted?
480
00:28:08,825 --> 00:28:10,115
My bad.
481
00:28:10,126 --> 00:28:13,026
Oh, God, that's vile.
482
00:28:16,398 --> 00:28:18,258
Grab it.
The map!
483
00:28:25,306 --> 00:28:27,866
It's a long way down.
484
00:28:28,675 --> 00:28:30,235
Man, that would have hurt.
485
00:28:30,243 --> 00:28:31,843
Watch where you're going.
486
00:28:31,844 --> 00:28:34,814
Can't help it. It's the open road.
It gets me all fired up.
487
00:28:34,815 --> 00:28:35,879
Always has.
488
00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:37,947
Hey, you smoking now?
Yep.
489
00:28:37,948 --> 00:28:40,278
I never went on a road
trip with my parents.
490
00:28:40,683 --> 00:28:41,423
Never.
491
00:28:41,424 --> 00:28:46,147
We went to the Poconos, and my Aunt
Mickey's house in Long Island. Lindenhurst.
492
00:28:46,155 --> 00:28:48,015
You missed out.
We went all the time.
493
00:28:48,023 --> 00:28:49,857
From sea to shining sea.
494
00:28:49,858 --> 00:28:53,888
Hey, your old man was a
road warrior, huh? Nah.
495
00:28:54,128 --> 00:28:55,758
He just wanted to get there.
496
00:28:55,762 --> 00:28:58,100
He wasn't a stop-and-smell-the-roses
kind of a guy.
497
00:28:58,101 --> 00:29:01,027
I mean, me and Ma, we'd be
looking at something amazing and
498
00:29:01,033 --> 00:29:05,803
he'd just be standing there, smoking
a heater, facing the highway.
499
00:29:06,271 --> 00:29:11,008
And he'd click his fingers, "Let's
go." And we'd be on our way.
500
00:29:11,009 --> 00:29:13,939
Man, they don't make
them like that anymore.
501
00:29:13,945 --> 00:29:16,375
Billy, I'm bagged.
You take them.
502
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,250
I'm still shotgun,
right, Crime Dog?
503
00:29:19,251 --> 00:29:21,278
But I handle the music.
504
00:29:21,283 --> 00:29:23,017
Okay, fair enough.
505
00:29:41,769 --> 00:29:42,929
Guess who?
506
00:29:56,182 --> 00:29:57,312
Christ.
507
00:29:59,284 --> 00:30:00,484
What am I doing?
508
00:30:01,352 --> 00:30:04,752
Quality time, bro.
Beats a shrink.
509
00:30:05,122 --> 00:30:06,322
No, not this.
510
00:30:08,325 --> 00:30:10,855
I just always thought having
a kid would grow me up.
511
00:30:13,162 --> 00:30:17,432
Instead, it's a bill, due
every day, every minute.
512
00:30:18,533 --> 00:30:20,033
At least you got one.
513
00:30:20,034 --> 00:30:21,434
I'm not griping.
514
00:30:21,435 --> 00:30:23,195
I just thought it would
make a man out of me.
515
00:30:23,403 --> 00:30:26,973
My dad always seemed like a man
and he had me when he was a kid.
516
00:30:29,508 --> 00:30:31,038
Hey, want to order
some room service?
517
00:30:31,042 --> 00:30:33,442
Room service?
What, in a dump like this?
518
00:30:33,444 --> 00:30:35,311
Here we go, Chinese.
519
00:30:35,312 --> 00:30:37,246
Alligators, cool.
520
00:30:37,247 --> 00:30:40,247
Let's see. What goes
good with 42 beers?
521
00:30:40,250 --> 00:30:42,820
Okay, wait. Let's get something
straight here, fellas.
522
00:30:42,821 --> 00:30:45,349
I definitely get one
of these beds.
523
00:30:45,354 --> 00:30:47,824
How do you figure? It was my
Championship Bowl tickets
524
00:30:47,825 --> 00:30:51,192
that started this whole trip, so
eventually the perks have to kick in.
525
00:30:51,193 --> 00:30:53,360
Nice try there, Billy.
526
00:30:53,361 --> 00:30:57,200
But my chariot got us here, which
means bed number B comes my way.
527
00:30:57,201 --> 00:30:58,228
Not from this angle.
528
00:30:58,232 --> 00:30:59,832
Then you leave me no choice.
529
00:30:59,999 --> 00:31:01,999
Smack-down.
Oh, yeah.
530
00:31:02,001 --> 00:31:03,470
WWF, this is going to be good.
531
00:31:03,471 --> 00:31:05,269
You too, liver lips,
on your feet.
532
00:31:05,270 --> 00:31:07,440
Both beds will be earned
out here on the mat.
533
00:31:09,105 --> 00:31:10,195
Oh!
534
00:31:10,806 --> 00:31:12,836
My balls!
That's dirty, Mark.
535
00:31:12,841 --> 00:31:14,271
What can I tell you?
536
00:31:14,275 --> 00:31:15,405
Next battle.
537
00:31:16,109 --> 00:31:17,939
Fine, let's go.
538
00:31:27,118 --> 00:31:28,278
I give up!
539
00:31:28,585 --> 00:31:30,815
You want it that bad,
you can have it.
540
00:31:30,820 --> 00:31:31,990
Just like that, huh?
541
00:31:31,991 --> 00:31:33,017
Just like that.
542
00:31:33,021 --> 00:31:34,421
I'm tired and I don't care.
543
00:31:36,023 --> 00:31:38,423
To the victor come his spoils.
544
00:31:41,494 --> 00:31:42,594
Ugh!
545
00:31:43,329 --> 00:31:46,229
Aw, it figures, I get
Heidi Fleiss' cot.
546
00:31:47,432 --> 00:31:48,832
This is gross.
547
00:31:48,833 --> 00:31:51,033
I guess you get
what you pay for.
548
00:31:53,437 --> 00:31:57,037
See, never bet
against the Crime Dog.
549
00:32:01,244 --> 00:32:04,314
Hey, guys, I'm
glad we're doing this.
550
00:32:04,579 --> 00:32:05,909
Me too.
551
00:32:06,413 --> 00:32:10,182
Ever notice if you scratch halfway
between your balls and your asshole
552
00:32:10,183 --> 00:32:11,583
it smells like pussy?
553
00:32:12,585 --> 00:32:14,245
No, it doesn't.
554
00:32:14,253 --> 00:32:16,323
Get a little
closer to your bung.
555
00:32:19,022 --> 00:32:20,522
Hmm?
556
00:32:20,523 --> 00:32:22,193
I just wanted to say goodnight.
557
00:32:24,026 --> 00:32:25,286
You guys are sick.
558
00:32:31,965 --> 00:32:33,255
Excuse me, miss.
559
00:32:33,266 --> 00:32:34,096
Yeah.
560
00:32:34,100 --> 00:32:36,870
I ordered sunny-side up.
These are over easy.
561
00:32:36,871 --> 00:32:38,939
Okay, I'll get them
to redo them.
562
00:32:39,170 --> 00:32:40,600
Why do they always
foul up my order?
563
00:32:40,604 --> 00:32:43,574
'Cause you always ask for
side orders and confuse them.
564
00:32:43,575 --> 00:32:45,573
Why not just make it easy?
Order number three.
565
00:32:45,575 --> 00:32:47,335
I don't like the way
everything gets hash browns.
566
00:32:47,343 --> 00:32:51,913
Hash browns are a filler. I want eggs
and meat, period. Like the Duke.
567
00:32:52,214 --> 00:32:56,183
John Wayne? I happen to know
John Wayne hated hash browns.
568
00:32:56,184 --> 00:32:57,350
You're out of your mind.
569
00:32:57,351 --> 00:32:59,121
When am I gonna learn?
Stick with the cereal.
570
00:32:59,122 --> 00:33:02,449
You get your own little self-contained
meal. Nobody has had their mitts on it.
571
00:33:02,455 --> 00:33:06,055
Special K, Frosted Flakes.
It's impossible to screw up.
572
00:33:07,059 --> 00:33:08,359
I asked for dry.
573
00:33:09,627 --> 00:33:11,357
Hey, Miss Allison, how are you?
574
00:33:11,362 --> 00:33:12,492
Sher, sure hope you get
this message.
575
00:33:12,496 --> 00:33:17,096
We're just down here in South Carolina,
making our way to the Championship Bowl.
576
00:33:17,100 --> 00:33:20,100
I was thinking about you. We
stopped and got something to eat.
577
00:33:20,103 --> 00:33:23,071
How's, uh...
How's Hayden doing?
578
00:33:23,072 --> 00:33:24,602
God almighty,
I miss him so much.
579
00:33:24,606 --> 00:33:30,306
Hey, Sher, I gotta tell you. I didn't like the
way that you decided to throw him in the,
580
00:33:30,311 --> 00:33:31,641
in the car and split.
581
00:33:32,078 --> 00:33:33,608
I know I screwed up and all.
582
00:33:33,612 --> 00:33:36,082
But you can't just take
somebody's kid like that.
583
00:33:36,083 --> 00:33:37,911
You're not perfect either,
for the record.
584
00:33:37,916 --> 00:33:41,116
I mean, how many times did you come visit
my father when he was in the hospital?
585
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:42,750
The man's sick and you
can't pop in and see him once?
586
00:33:42,754 --> 00:33:47,394
When your mother was sick I was like a
frickin' delivery service three times a week.
587
00:33:47,657 --> 00:33:52,027
Just put the shoe on the other foot.
That's all I'm saying, you know.
588
00:33:52,028 --> 00:33:55,358
It's a two-way street
and I know, I know...
589
00:33:55,564 --> 00:33:57,704
Your, like, 11 hours
of labor and diapers
590
00:33:57,705 --> 00:34:01,099
and I'm under a lot
of pressure too, okay?
591
00:34:01,102 --> 00:34:02,802
I mean, you find a way to pay
the freight for three people,
592
00:34:02,803 --> 00:34:07,273
start a college fund and somehow figure
out how to stay ahead of the various...
593
00:34:08,074 --> 00:34:09,507
Bills, you may have.
594
00:34:09,508 --> 00:34:12,738
So I frickin' gambled.
So what?
595
00:34:12,744 --> 00:34:15,814
I made a few picks. They didn't come in.
Nobody's perfect.
596
00:34:15,815 --> 00:34:18,613
All I can tell you is
that I never quit on you.
597
00:34:18,615 --> 00:34:21,245
I never quit on you,
you selfish...
598
00:34:26,288 --> 00:34:28,488
I'm sorry. This is my mess.
599
00:34:29,591 --> 00:34:31,058
Sorry, Sherry.
600
00:34:52,813 --> 00:34:54,146
How's the wife?
601
00:34:54,147 --> 00:34:55,107
Line was busy.
602
00:34:55,114 --> 00:34:55,814
Awfully long busy signal.
603
00:34:55,815 --> 00:34:58,214
Who are you, the time keeper?
I said the line was busy.
604
00:34:58,216 --> 00:35:00,176
Just a concerned citizen.
605
00:35:00,551 --> 00:35:04,451
Hey, Mark, want to get some fireworks for
old time's sake? It's legal in the South.
606
00:35:04,454 --> 00:35:06,588
It's legal all the way up
the Delaware Water Gap.
607
00:35:06,589 --> 00:35:08,289
You shouldn't know that. You
can get whatever you want
608
00:35:08,290 --> 00:35:11,490
the minute you leave Jersey.
Sparklers, the mortars, floral shells,
609
00:35:12,193 --> 00:35:14,433
re-loadable black powder rockets.
610
00:35:14,594 --> 00:35:15,860
Anything you want.
611
00:35:15,861 --> 00:35:17,761
I'm worried about you.
612
00:35:17,762 --> 00:35:20,396
Look, Vanna White.
613
00:35:20,397 --> 00:35:23,197
Vanna.
I used to love her.
614
00:35:23,199 --> 00:35:24,429
Me too. She's a babe.
615
00:35:24,433 --> 00:35:26,300
I wonder if she ever
did that Chuck Woolery.
616
00:35:26,301 --> 00:35:28,531
She did Chuck Woolery's Love Connection.
Think she did?
617
00:35:28,536 --> 00:35:30,866
No, might have taken
a run at Bob Barker though.
618
00:35:30,871 --> 00:35:33,341
Down at the commissary. He's
been known to tap the help.
619
00:35:33,342 --> 00:35:35,210
If the price was right.
620
00:35:37,376 --> 00:35:39,676
Okay, quick quiz.
621
00:35:39,678 --> 00:35:41,738
Dead or alive, Monty Hall?
622
00:35:41,746 --> 00:35:42,776
Dead.
Alive.
623
00:35:43,413 --> 00:35:44,413
He's alive.
624
00:35:44,414 --> 00:35:45,684
- Gene Rayburn?
- Dead.
625
00:35:46,248 --> 00:35:47,648
Richard Dawson?
Who?
626
00:35:47,649 --> 00:35:49,579
The Hogan's Hero guy.
Or Family Feud.
627
00:35:49,584 --> 00:35:52,352
The fat dude? Nah. You're
thinking Louie Anderson.
628
00:35:52,353 --> 00:35:53,593
Dawson was the original.
Dead or alive?
629
00:35:53,594 --> 00:35:56,187
He's gotta be dust or he'd still
be doing the show, right?
630
00:35:56,556 --> 00:35:59,516
Look at us.
We're officially white trash.
631
00:35:59,525 --> 00:36:01,725
Yeah, pretty much.
632
00:36:01,727 --> 00:36:02,687
A Vanna museum.
633
00:36:02,694 --> 00:36:05,464
My mother always said I'd
make it to the White House.
634
00:36:05,465 --> 00:36:09,802
You know Vanna was on a soap
for like two months? Edge of Night.
635
00:36:09,803 --> 00:36:12,800
Some folks said she had a
shot as a serious actress.
636
00:36:13,537 --> 00:36:14,837
Then she got the Wheel.
637
00:36:15,405 --> 00:36:17,135
Add that to the list of
useless information.
638
00:36:17,140 --> 00:36:21,309
How many people do you know have the first
100 episodes of Wheel of Fortune on VHS?
639
00:36:21,310 --> 00:36:24,540
Might want to keep that
autobiographical tidbit to yourself.
640
00:36:24,546 --> 00:36:26,406
I want to get them
transferred to DVD.
641
00:36:26,414 --> 00:36:29,484
I just don't like the loss
of quality in the digitizing.
642
00:36:30,717 --> 00:36:32,777
Billy, what are you doing?
643
00:36:32,785 --> 00:36:34,315
Sniffing Vanna White's bush.
644
00:36:35,653 --> 00:36:37,493
16, 17...
645
00:36:38,255 --> 00:36:39,445
Is that 21?
Yep,
646
00:36:39,456 --> 00:36:40,886
21 rocket salute.
647
00:36:41,624 --> 00:36:43,494
22, Vanna White.
648
00:36:45,427 --> 00:36:47,627
To the greatest
letter turner of all time.
649
00:36:47,629 --> 00:36:50,397
To the only letter
turner of all time.
650
00:36:50,398 --> 00:36:51,658
Which makes her the greatest.
651
00:37:09,180 --> 00:37:10,310
Oh, no.
652
00:37:11,581 --> 00:37:12,911
What do we do?
653
00:37:13,382 --> 00:37:16,252
I'm pretty sure we just
lit Vanna's house on fire.
654
00:37:18,219 --> 00:37:20,186
Oh, shit!
655
00:37:20,187 --> 00:37:23,717
Come on, guys. We gotta do something.
We gotta put it out.
656
00:37:24,590 --> 00:37:26,590
This is a piece of history here.
657
00:37:28,627 --> 00:37:29,827
Cheers, Billy.
658
00:37:31,529 --> 00:37:33,659
How could Vanna not have a hose?
659
00:37:34,731 --> 00:37:36,231
That wood's dry.
660
00:37:36,232 --> 00:37:37,332
Yep.
661
00:37:37,333 --> 00:37:39,833
Get a blanket. Check the Fury.
Get something.
662
00:37:39,835 --> 00:37:42,865
I'd like to buy a vowel
and solve the puzzle.
663
00:37:42,871 --> 00:37:43,971
You may.
664
00:37:43,972 --> 00:37:45,942
"Smoldering rubble."
665
00:37:51,210 --> 00:37:53,910
Remember when Vanna stopped
actually turning the letters?
666
00:37:53,912 --> 00:37:57,712
She did? Yeah. Now she just touches them.
Special effect.
667
00:37:57,715 --> 00:37:59,605
Out of the blue,
she just went electric.
668
00:37:59,616 --> 00:38:03,246
Like Dylan. Way worse. I'm
dead-ended right there.
669
00:38:03,252 --> 00:38:05,452
Uh-oh.
Fire guys are rolling.
670
00:38:35,684 --> 00:38:38,894
Okay, Medal of Honor
or Super Bowl MVP?
671
00:38:39,387 --> 00:38:40,287
Medal of Honor.
672
00:38:40,288 --> 00:38:42,287
Nobody is shooting at you in the stadium.
Fact.
673
00:38:42,289 --> 00:38:43,689
Ooh, 3 o'clock.
674
00:38:43,690 --> 00:38:45,320
Nice.
675
00:38:45,490 --> 00:38:47,720
Anybody want a taco?
676
00:38:48,625 --> 00:38:51,985
So the doctor says, "If this
is my rectal thermometer,
677
00:38:51,995 --> 00:38:53,625
"what the hell did I do
with my pen?"
678
00:38:54,029 --> 00:38:55,259
Is that funny?
679
00:38:55,263 --> 00:38:56,403
I think it would be.
680
00:38:56,404 --> 00:38:57,957
Yeah, definitely.
681
00:38:57,965 --> 00:38:58,855
It would be if what?
682
00:38:58,865 --> 00:39:02,395
If we weren't shroomed out of our tits.
Uh-huh, yes.
683
00:39:02,401 --> 00:39:03,401
Absolutely.
684
00:39:04,903 --> 00:39:06,303
Mushrooms?
685
00:39:06,304 --> 00:39:07,441
It's a hallucinogenic.
686
00:39:07,442 --> 00:39:09,768
I know what it is. Where
are you guys from?
687
00:39:09,773 --> 00:39:10,773
Nashville.
688
00:39:12,776 --> 00:39:13,906
Cool.
689
00:39:15,544 --> 00:39:18,479
♪ Give me a job
Give me security
690
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:20,848
♪ Give me a chance
to survive
691
00:39:20,849 --> 00:39:24,979
♪ I'm just a poor soul
in the unemployment line
692
00:39:24,986 --> 00:39:28,646
♪ I swear I'm barely alive
693
00:39:28,656 --> 00:39:31,686
♪ My mother and father,
wife and my friends
694
00:39:31,692 --> 00:39:33,792
♪ I've seen them
laugh in my face
695
00:39:33,794 --> 00:39:37,296
♪ But I got the power
and I got the will
696
00:39:37,297 --> 00:39:39,797
♪ I'm not a charity case
697
00:39:39,799 --> 00:39:42,529
♪ I tell you long nights
698
00:39:42,535 --> 00:39:44,365
♪ Impossible odds
699
00:39:44,370 --> 00:39:46,938
♪ Keeping my eye
on the keyhole
700
00:39:46,939 --> 00:39:49,339
We have to go. Now.
701
00:39:49,341 --> 00:39:51,971
♪ Well I'm gonna be
a blue collar man ♪
702
00:39:51,976 --> 00:39:53,706
You shouldn't do that.
703
00:39:54,545 --> 00:39:55,735
Ever.
704
00:39:56,012 --> 00:39:58,612
Come on. Let's get going.
Now that's funny.
705
00:39:58,614 --> 00:40:00,654
You're pathetic.
706
00:40:03,818 --> 00:40:05,048
Nice ho tag.
707
00:40:06,953 --> 00:40:08,023
What?
708
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:09,586
Ho tag?
709
00:40:09,587 --> 00:40:10,317
Let me guess.
710
00:40:10,321 --> 00:40:13,661
That tattoo is to remind your boyfriend
that your ass is not your face.
711
00:40:15,925 --> 00:40:17,055
Jerk.
712
00:40:17,959 --> 00:40:19,789
- Skank.
- Come on.
713
00:40:19,794 --> 00:40:21,060
Geez.
714
00:40:21,061 --> 00:40:23,561
And here I thought
Styx was bulletproof.
715
00:40:23,696 --> 00:40:26,626
That was Styx? Oh.
716
00:40:27,599 --> 00:40:28,929
I'm gonna take a leak.
717
00:40:32,069 --> 00:40:34,338
Why don't we leave that
in the trunk for a while?
718
00:40:34,339 --> 00:40:36,837
In the trunk? Yeah, you
can give it a rest.
719
00:40:36,839 --> 00:40:38,369
I'll ride in the trunk
before that happens.
720
00:40:38,373 --> 00:40:43,943
This baby is a work of art, worth at least 7
grand. No way she's sleeping in the dark.
721
00:40:55,089 --> 00:40:57,719
I'm not kidding. He just came
up from the field house and he says
722
00:40:57,724 --> 00:41:00,524
half the basketball team just got
suspended by the NCAA. - No way.
723
00:41:00,526 --> 00:41:01,886
They got free clothes
from a store.
724
00:41:01,894 --> 00:41:04,762
Some big booster was hooking them up
with all this swag, totally illegal.
725
00:41:04,763 --> 00:41:05,903
They gonna miss
the game tonight?
726
00:41:05,904 --> 00:41:07,597
Four starters and the Russian.
727
00:41:07,598 --> 00:41:08,828
They're gonna get smoked.
728
00:41:08,833 --> 00:41:11,568
Virginia is like
a 22-point underdog.
729
00:41:11,569 --> 00:41:14,939
I bet you they'll cover the
spread tonight. No doubt.
730
00:41:15,673 --> 00:41:19,473
This is the surest thing
in the history of sure things.
731
00:41:19,476 --> 00:41:22,876
If you could just let me put
down $1,000 on Virginia, I'll...
732
00:41:25,947 --> 00:41:27,147
I hate you.
733
00:41:27,148 --> 00:41:29,648
All right, I need you
guys to concentrate here.
734
00:41:29,650 --> 00:41:33,150
Do you know anyone who lives in
or near Atlantic City or Vegas
735
00:41:33,153 --> 00:41:35,753
with access to
large sums of cash?
736
00:41:35,921 --> 00:41:37,051
Not that I can think of.
737
00:41:37,055 --> 00:41:37,885
You cannot be serious.
738
00:41:37,889 --> 00:41:40,219
I haven't been more serious in my life.
Think harder.
739
00:41:40,224 --> 00:41:41,794
You'll be doing them a favor.
All they gotta do
740
00:41:41,795 --> 00:41:45,261
is walk into the casino, put down a
bet for me and I'll give 'em 50%.
741
00:41:45,262 --> 00:41:46,662
I don't know anybody.
742
00:41:46,663 --> 00:41:47,601
80%.
743
00:41:47,602 --> 00:41:48,157
We just don't know.
744
00:41:48,164 --> 00:41:52,203
An Indian casino, Foxwoods. You must
know somebody who lives in Connecticut.
745
00:41:52,204 --> 00:41:53,831
Mark, calm down.
This is my lock.
746
00:41:53,835 --> 00:41:57,665
This is my bulletproof, no two ways
about it, once in a lifetime lock.
747
00:41:57,672 --> 00:42:00,540
It's like I can see
tomorrow's sports pages today
748
00:42:00,541 --> 00:42:02,641
and word is gonna get out, it's
gonna spread like wildfire
749
00:42:02,643 --> 00:42:05,183
and then they're gonna take this thing
right off the board. Now think!
750
00:42:05,184 --> 00:42:08,508
We don't know anyone who can bet.
I am going to miss this!
751
00:42:08,514 --> 00:42:10,548
I am going to miss this!
Get a hold...
752
00:42:10,549 --> 00:42:11,979
Mark, get a hold of yourself.
Come on!
753
00:42:11,983 --> 00:42:12,953
Here, medicine.
754
00:42:12,954 --> 00:42:15,550
What it that? Mushrooms,
the redhead dropped them.
755
00:42:18,621 --> 00:42:23,257
I walked right into a taco stand.
I can't believe it would...
756
00:42:23,258 --> 00:42:27,628
I thought it would be on a train.
A metro-liner rolling down to DC
757
00:42:27,629 --> 00:42:32,799
for a Redskins game when a senator
comes in and sits next to me and
758
00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:36,030
tells me he's gonna have the Secret
Service shove the guy into a dumpster.
759
00:42:36,036 --> 00:42:40,296
Give me those. If I've gotta listen to
him, I've gotta be on the same planet.
760
00:42:42,941 --> 00:42:45,311
Just don't let
him push you around.
761
00:42:45,312 --> 00:42:47,710
Do you even know where
he's staying?
762
00:42:47,712 --> 00:42:50,550
I got the seat locations
from Jason's mom.
763
00:42:50,551 --> 00:42:51,648
Sure you want to do this?
764
00:42:51,649 --> 00:42:54,749
Mom, he sounded terrible on the phone.
I need to go to him.
765
00:42:55,819 --> 00:42:57,789
Here, Mommy, for luck.
766
00:42:59,121 --> 00:43:00,291
I love you.
767
00:43:01,022 --> 00:43:04,222
- Can you see from back there?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
768
00:43:04,825 --> 00:43:07,055
Got chasers?
A little bit.
769
00:43:07,060 --> 00:43:08,590
You've done this before?
770
00:43:08,594 --> 00:43:09,760
Not in a while.
771
00:43:09,761 --> 00:43:12,896
I had a phase.
I tried most everything.
772
00:43:12,897 --> 00:43:15,827
Gourmet reefer, crystal meth,
773
00:43:15,833 --> 00:43:17,333
shrooms the odd Friday.
774
00:43:17,334 --> 00:43:18,204
Crystal meth?
775
00:43:18,205 --> 00:43:22,841
Nobody's paying much attention to me
so it's pretty easy to hide the buzz.
776
00:43:23,672 --> 00:43:25,042
What if I just jumped?
777
00:43:25,043 --> 00:43:26,070
Whoa, whoa.
778
00:43:26,074 --> 00:43:27,111
Hey, don't screw around.
779
00:43:27,112 --> 00:43:31,138
What would I be thinking when I hit?
You know, the last thing
780
00:43:31,145 --> 00:43:32,805
going through my mind?
781
00:43:33,013 --> 00:43:34,183
Your ass.
782
00:43:37,749 --> 00:43:40,179
38 years old and I got squat.
783
00:43:41,318 --> 00:43:42,348
You too, Billy.
784
00:43:42,352 --> 00:43:44,590
Back there was
a stinking disaster.
785
00:43:44,591 --> 00:43:46,587
You know, wasn't long ago
you were gigging clubs
786
00:43:46,589 --> 00:43:48,989
and knocking chicks off
your dick with your guitar.
787
00:43:48,991 --> 00:43:50,991
Ancient history, bro.
Dead and buried.
788
00:43:50,993 --> 00:43:54,963
No, no. I used to love
watching you on stage.
789
00:43:55,330 --> 00:43:56,697
You had the walk.
790
00:43:56,698 --> 00:44:01,028
Then some Tuesday, you woke up a roll-over
pussy just taking shit from everybody.
791
00:44:01,035 --> 00:44:03,295
Your wife, people at work.
792
00:44:03,303 --> 00:44:05,203
Dog chases every car he sees.
793
00:44:05,204 --> 00:44:06,674
First one he lets go...
794
00:44:07,773 --> 00:44:10,641
It's not just me.
I mean, all three of us.
795
00:44:10,642 --> 00:44:14,111
I don't know if it's bad
luck or age or laziness.
796
00:44:14,112 --> 00:44:17,652
One day you realize you're
not going to be president.
797
00:44:17,948 --> 00:44:19,148
You don't get it.
798
00:44:19,782 --> 00:44:21,852
I mean no offense, fellas,
799
00:44:22,684 --> 00:44:24,184
but I was gonna be president.
800
00:44:24,985 --> 00:44:27,785
Or governor, CEO...
801
00:44:29,188 --> 00:44:30,348
An astronaut.
802
00:44:31,155 --> 00:44:32,985
I don't know.
You know...
803
00:44:33,790 --> 00:44:35,360
Somebody instead...
804
00:44:42,765 --> 00:44:44,255
Mark, you got a kid.
805
00:44:44,266 --> 00:44:48,096
Who collects a half million dollars if I
should happen to fall off this bridge.
806
00:44:48,770 --> 00:44:50,000
Hey, that's crazy talk.
807
00:44:50,004 --> 00:44:55,014
Yeah, well, I'm running out of illusions. And
I'm not going into the New Year a loser.
808
00:44:55,743 --> 00:44:58,983
Wow, we got nothing
going for us.
809
00:45:00,046 --> 00:45:01,276
We got beer left.
810
00:45:17,328 --> 00:45:18,858
Hey, Billy.
811
00:45:20,363 --> 00:45:22,963
You taking a pee or just
standing and touching yourself?
812
00:45:22,965 --> 00:45:25,295
You know how it is,
once you break the seal.
813
00:45:25,300 --> 00:45:29,369
Hey, where's the best place
you guys ever took a leak?
814
00:45:29,370 --> 00:45:32,440
No such thing as a bad
leak as far as I'm concerned.
815
00:45:32,441 --> 00:45:33,969
Agreed.
816
00:45:33,973 --> 00:45:35,306
Grand Canyon.
817
00:45:35,307 --> 00:45:36,007
Really?
818
00:45:36,008 --> 00:45:39,267
Yep. Right over the friggin' edge.
A gust of wind,
819
00:45:39,276 --> 00:45:43,276
I would have fallen a quarter-mile
and pancaked a pack mule.
820
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:45,948
I took a leak between
subway cars.
821
00:45:45,949 --> 00:45:51,049
Elevated 7 train, rolling through
Queens on the way to Shea Stadium.
822
00:45:51,054 --> 00:45:53,124
Fourth of July, doubleheader.
823
00:45:54,189 --> 00:45:55,049
Nice.
824
00:45:55,056 --> 00:45:58,716
You?
Nancy Golotta's back.
825
00:45:59,259 --> 00:46:02,159
Her back? I didn't want to.
She asked me.
826
00:46:02,361 --> 00:46:04,829
She's dirty.
Ya think?
827
00:46:04,830 --> 00:46:07,130
You could've said no.
Hold it.
828
00:46:07,465 --> 00:46:11,865
You had sex with Nancy Golotta?
You demon!
829
00:46:11,869 --> 00:46:15,969
The last girl I was with
before my wife. My wife...
830
00:46:15,973 --> 00:46:18,407
Ha!
Who's coming off?
831
00:46:18,408 --> 00:46:20,308
Look at those stars!
832
00:46:20,309 --> 00:46:23,878
Drink that on the horizon.
Twinkle, twinkle, Twinkie.
833
00:46:23,879 --> 00:46:27,009
The trees in front of you
are 30 feet high, genius.
834
00:46:27,015 --> 00:46:28,275
You can't see the horizon.
835
00:46:28,282 --> 00:46:30,052
Come on, what's taking you...
836
00:46:30,150 --> 00:46:31,316
Good Lord!
837
00:46:31,317 --> 00:46:33,777
I'm blocked!
What should I do?
838
00:46:33,786 --> 00:46:35,786
Okay, I know what
to do. I know what to do.
839
00:46:35,788 --> 00:46:38,888
Hold your balls, fetal position. Play dead.
840
00:46:38,891 --> 00:46:42,161
Play dead? MARK: No, that's bears!
Run, dumb-ass.
841
00:46:42,162 --> 00:46:46,300
Come on, come on, come on!
842
00:46:49,866 --> 00:46:52,796
- Easy...
- Cover my balls...
843
00:47:04,846 --> 00:47:08,176
Whoa, hey, pull over.
844
00:47:16,456 --> 00:47:21,456
How you feeling? BILLY: We found
a carnival on shrooms, you tell me.
845
00:47:29,969 --> 00:47:31,229
Hey.
846
00:47:31,536 --> 00:47:34,136
Step off of that thing,
young man.
847
00:47:35,272 --> 00:47:38,812
If you break that, somebody's
gonna have to fix it. Sorry.
848
00:47:39,175 --> 00:47:42,375
No harm done,
just can't add work
849
00:47:42,378 --> 00:47:44,538
when there's plenty
to do already.
850
00:47:45,446 --> 00:47:49,076
I knew these things were rigged.
You can call me Melville.
851
00:47:49,082 --> 00:47:51,522
Bill McGriff, Chalfont, PA.
852
00:47:52,451 --> 00:47:55,081
Hour west of Philly,
I know it well.
853
00:47:55,086 --> 00:47:58,386
Worked the northern circuit with
the Clyde Beatty outfit for years.
854
00:48:00,090 --> 00:48:02,290
Hey, wait.
That's the circus, right?
855
00:48:02,292 --> 00:48:05,362
The real circus, where you
smell the elephant dung.
856
00:48:05,363 --> 00:48:07,991
Not like that tutti-frutti
French affair.
857
00:48:07,996 --> 00:48:10,226
Cirque Du Soleil?
Yeah, that'd be the one.
858
00:48:10,231 --> 00:48:14,431
I'm Jason, and I love the circus.
Yeah, me too, Jason.
859
00:48:14,435 --> 00:48:16,495
Till they forced me out.
860
00:48:16,503 --> 00:48:18,873
Come on, boys,
have a drink with me.
861
00:48:19,105 --> 00:48:20,195
Come on, guys.
862
00:48:20,206 --> 00:48:21,306
Right behind you.
863
00:48:21,307 --> 00:48:22,567
They forced you out?
864
00:48:22,574 --> 00:48:24,007
Yes, they did.
865
00:48:24,008 --> 00:48:25,508
Big cats.
866
00:48:25,509 --> 00:48:27,376
Must've hurt.
867
00:48:27,377 --> 00:48:30,407
A lion and a tiger
have a fight. Who wins?
868
00:48:30,413 --> 00:48:34,352
Give you a hint. A female lion looks
enough like a female tiger that
869
00:48:34,353 --> 00:48:37,880
the horny striped male thinks
he might take a shot at her.
870
00:48:37,886 --> 00:48:41,186
King of the jungle doesn't like
the competition. Fight's on.
871
00:48:41,189 --> 00:48:45,519
So the lion wins. He's got right
on his side. You see, a tiger
872
00:48:45,526 --> 00:48:50,326
stands on three paws.
Swings with his fourth.
873
00:48:50,330 --> 00:48:54,030
Lion gets up on his haunches,
fires back, two-hand volley.
874
00:48:55,004 --> 00:49:00,470
Outgunned, tiger flips onto his back,
tries to fight up from the bottom.
875
00:49:00,905 --> 00:49:01,565
Fatal mistake.
876
00:49:01,572 --> 00:49:03,012
Is that what happened to you?
877
00:49:03,013 --> 00:49:05,437
You got between
a lion and a tiger?
878
00:49:05,442 --> 00:49:09,482
Nah, I rolled my pickup
shitfaced outside of Albany.
879
00:49:11,047 --> 00:49:13,347
Can't drive a stick no more,
880
00:49:13,349 --> 00:49:16,379
but I get by all right.
881
00:49:17,018 --> 00:49:20,448
Hey, fella. MELVILLE: St.
Nicholas, where you been?
882
00:49:20,454 --> 00:49:24,264
Got some lungs on him. Yeah,
well he's got a lot to say.
883
00:49:24,265 --> 00:49:26,587
St. Nicholas...
Like Santa Claus?
884
00:49:26,592 --> 00:49:28,426
Come here, buddy. Hey.
885
00:49:28,427 --> 00:49:35,497
Yeah, he brings me presents all year.
Birds, mice... Deader than yesterday.
886
00:49:48,278 --> 00:49:50,338
A gift's a gift.
887
00:49:55,718 --> 00:50:00,318
Penny-feathers. I figure you
Pennsylvania boys are heading south.
888
00:50:00,322 --> 00:50:02,622
- Florida, hmm?
- That's right.
889
00:50:02,624 --> 00:50:04,764
Best damn bar in the state.
890
00:50:06,193 --> 00:50:08,327
Penny-feathers?
891
00:50:08,328 --> 00:50:10,528
What you seek,
892
00:50:11,697 --> 00:50:13,627
you may find there.
893
00:50:24,774 --> 00:50:27,574
One arm, lives in
a dirty old trailer...
894
00:50:27,576 --> 00:50:29,206
Didn't seem to bother him much.
895
00:50:29,210 --> 00:50:32,340
Big talk, little cat, creepy bastard.
Deluded.
896
00:50:32,346 --> 00:50:34,446
- Senile.
- We won!
897
00:50:34,448 --> 00:50:38,048
We won, we won!
I don't believe it!
898
00:50:38,051 --> 00:50:43,721
We're rich! Whoo! We won, we won!
I gotta tell 'em.
899
00:50:43,723 --> 00:50:47,593
Jason, Jason, what...
900
00:50:49,328 --> 00:50:51,458
Tell who?
Come on.
901
00:50:53,164 --> 00:50:57,300
We won! Did you take my
sports section, chief?
902
00:50:57,301 --> 00:50:58,570
The answer to all our prayers.
903
00:50:58,571 --> 00:51:00,498
Hand me the toilet roll,
will ya?
904
00:51:00,503 --> 00:51:03,638
Oh, sure, Elmo.
You need to wipe up? Here.
905
00:51:03,639 --> 00:51:06,739
Wipe up, Elmo. Use that.
Oh, that's stinky, Elmo.
906
00:51:06,742 --> 00:51:09,542
Use this, that'll make you...
907
00:51:09,544 --> 00:51:11,081
Get out of here!
908
00:51:11,082 --> 00:51:13,608
What's the matter with you, huh?
909
00:51:13,613 --> 00:51:18,149
What the hell are you doing? Can
you say, "Mega Mad Millions"?
910
00:51:18,150 --> 00:51:20,580
Can you say $26 million?
911
00:51:20,585 --> 00:51:24,085
Million, as in
ma, ma, ma, million!
912
00:51:24,088 --> 00:51:29,058
0, 6, 10, 11, 25, 56, 57. God
damn, he's right.
913
00:51:29,059 --> 00:51:30,259
It's a match!
914
00:51:30,260 --> 00:51:31,290
We won!
915
00:51:31,294 --> 00:51:32,761
We won!
We won!
916
00:51:32,762 --> 00:51:34,796
We won! We won! We won!
917
00:51:38,132 --> 00:51:39,802
I can't believe it.
918
00:51:41,635 --> 00:51:44,395
Wait a minute.
919
00:51:44,737 --> 00:51:46,137
There's a problem.
920
00:51:46,138 --> 00:51:47,568
See, we split equal shares.
921
00:51:47,572 --> 00:51:49,539
No problems at all!
922
00:51:49,540 --> 00:51:51,470
Last week's newspaper.
923
00:51:54,077 --> 00:51:56,437
Never thought my last
meal would be a corn dog.
924
00:51:56,446 --> 00:52:00,276
I wonder if you can actually
hear your back snap when you hit.
925
00:52:00,283 --> 00:52:04,352
Hey, I got an idea.
What if only you guys jump.
926
00:52:04,353 --> 00:52:07,553
I tried to save you.
You know, I go back home,
927
00:52:07,556 --> 00:52:10,516
say great things about you,
work your legacy.
928
00:52:10,525 --> 00:52:13,285
You exist forever,
like dead heroes.
929
00:52:13,294 --> 00:52:15,161
Heroes who offed themselves?
930
00:52:15,162 --> 00:52:19,332
Oh, I know, I could write a
ballad about you guys. - No.
931
00:52:21,167 --> 00:52:22,597
Now you can jump last,
932
00:52:22,734 --> 00:52:25,204
but then, of course,
you'll be bridge Scrudge.
933
00:52:25,205 --> 00:52:28,338
No way.
We go, we go together.
934
00:52:28,339 --> 00:52:29,769
All right then.
935
00:52:30,673 --> 00:52:31,713
One.
936
00:52:32,207 --> 00:52:33,307
Two.
937
00:52:33,474 --> 00:52:34,614
Three.
938
00:52:38,311 --> 00:52:42,151
Last time I was happy. Well, Mom
and Dad, I guess this is it.
939
00:52:42,152 --> 00:52:47,578
I had a dog once.
Wouldn't poop till I looked away.
940
00:52:47,586 --> 00:52:50,316
We had a picture of my wife
and my kid in the car.
941
00:52:51,256 --> 00:52:52,656
It's going with me.
942
00:53:09,373 --> 00:53:12,673
I just wanna say,
if we're gonna do this...
943
00:53:12,842 --> 00:53:15,910
You're my best friend... Pal.
944
00:53:15,911 --> 00:53:19,911
Thanks, buddy. That means a lot.
Ah, you don't give a fuck.
945
00:53:19,915 --> 00:53:24,645
No sense going alone.
Here, I brought your wife too.
946
00:53:29,391 --> 00:53:31,691
Speak up, dear.
Ahhh!
947
00:53:33,494 --> 00:53:36,334
Sweet Jesus, we killed him.
Help me, you idiots!
948
00:53:36,335 --> 00:53:39,430
Come on, grab my wrists!
949
00:53:39,433 --> 00:53:41,367
We got you!
950
00:53:41,368 --> 00:53:43,468
I got you, I got you.
951
00:53:43,470 --> 00:53:46,700
I got you, I got you.
952
00:53:53,510 --> 00:53:55,710
- Oh, my back!
- My balls!
953
00:53:55,712 --> 00:53:56,682
Swim!
954
00:53:56,683 --> 00:53:58,179
So much for that buzz.
955
00:53:58,180 --> 00:54:01,280
Oh, shit.
956
00:54:05,553 --> 00:54:08,693
A midget couldn't kill
himself off of that bridge.
957
00:54:21,667 --> 00:54:24,767
Isn't this the part where the
hillbilly bangs me in the ass?
958
00:54:24,770 --> 00:54:26,900
Oh, you guys wear me out.
959
00:54:26,905 --> 00:54:31,405
You know what? I don't wanna be dead.
No way.
960
00:54:31,976 --> 00:54:33,536
Me neither.
961
00:54:34,978 --> 00:54:36,538
What if you could...
962
00:54:37,380 --> 00:54:40,610
What if you could be dead
and not be dead?
963
00:54:40,616 --> 00:54:41,816
Dead and... Huh?
964
00:54:41,817 --> 00:54:42,947
Yeah.
965
00:54:43,318 --> 00:54:47,248
No responsibilities.
No obligations.
966
00:54:47,588 --> 00:54:49,248
And no debt.
967
00:54:49,956 --> 00:54:51,786
You just get a fresh start.
968
00:55:07,706 --> 00:55:10,236
Uh, I wanna get an order
of wings, to go, please.
969
00:55:10,241 --> 00:55:11,471
Sure, hon, what size?
970
00:55:11,475 --> 00:55:13,975
Medium bucket. I'd like
a big bucket, myself.
971
00:55:13,977 --> 00:55:16,007
But I'm gonna make an
exception in your case.
972
00:55:16,012 --> 00:55:20,312
That's a sweet little turd cutter
you got there. First-rate.
973
00:55:23,319 --> 00:55:24,749
How would you like 'em?
974
00:55:24,753 --> 00:55:26,520
Hot, baby, real hot.
975
00:55:26,521 --> 00:55:28,351
Buddy...
976
00:55:28,356 --> 00:55:32,986
Uh, not the spiciest, but you know...
Good. Be right back.
977
00:55:37,330 --> 00:55:38,830
They got great wings here, huh?
978
00:55:38,831 --> 00:55:40,900
Best goddamn wings in the world.
979
00:55:40,901 --> 00:55:42,768
Any place else, I won't eat 'em.
980
00:55:42,769 --> 00:55:45,467
They make 'em with
too much lard, no butter.
981
00:55:45,469 --> 00:55:50,369
Makes me crap like I got a can of snakes
coming out of my ass.
982
00:55:50,773 --> 00:55:52,513
That's good to know.
983
00:55:54,443 --> 00:55:59,313
You like that? I'm not a
swordfish no sauce guy.
984
00:55:59,314 --> 00:56:01,384
If it's on the menu,
I'm eatin' it.
985
00:56:01,385 --> 00:56:04,282
That so? You bet
your ass, tough guy.
986
00:56:09,589 --> 00:56:10,849
Mark?
Yeah.
987
00:56:10,856 --> 00:56:14,416
If I get married,
I want you to be my best man.
988
00:56:14,426 --> 00:56:16,856
Sure, just let me know when
you meet somebody.
989
00:56:16,961 --> 00:56:19,661
No, seriously.
Yeah, I know it's
990
00:56:19,663 --> 00:56:23,032
not a time to bring it up, but
I've been thinking about it.
991
00:56:23,033 --> 00:56:25,473
And I consider you to be
my best friend.
992
00:56:25,474 --> 00:56:27,668
All right, buddy.
I'm honored.
993
00:56:27,670 --> 00:56:29,970
Ah, you don't give a fuck.
994
00:56:33,942 --> 00:56:34,912
Anything else?
995
00:56:34,913 --> 00:56:38,339
No, that's it. How about
a kiss for old Daddy-o?
996
00:56:38,778 --> 00:56:40,038
No touching!
997
00:56:40,045 --> 00:56:42,975
Mmm, still got
that new car smell.
998
00:56:42,981 --> 00:56:45,011
You ought to be careful.
Sometimes they have boyfriends.
999
00:56:45,016 --> 00:56:46,816
You're liable to get
yourself popped.
1000
00:56:46,817 --> 00:56:49,047
What the hell do
you know about it?
1001
00:56:49,786 --> 00:56:51,346
What?
You heard me.
1002
00:56:51,354 --> 00:56:52,794
Look, there's two kinds of
guys in the world, right?
1003
00:56:52,795 --> 00:56:56,918
I mean, look at you. You've never
been in a scrap in your whole life,
1004
00:56:56,925 --> 00:56:59,385
have you? Am I right?
1005
00:56:59,394 --> 00:57:02,464
It's not a big deal. I mean,
a lot of guys missed it.
1006
00:57:02,465 --> 00:57:04,000
It starts in kindergarten.
1007
00:57:04,001 --> 00:57:07,927
You pretend that the bully didn't knock you
down. Then, in grade school, you pretend
1008
00:57:07,934 --> 00:57:11,102
they didn't take your lunch
money away from you.
1009
00:57:11,103 --> 00:57:12,443
You're always
duckin' and dodgin'.
1010
00:57:12,444 --> 00:57:17,567
You get to high school, you pretend you
didn't hear the teasing and the catcalls.
1011
00:57:17,575 --> 00:57:20,705
And all the time, you're
running from the danger.
1012
00:57:20,711 --> 00:57:24,711
You skip enough chances, before
you know it, you're 30, 35,
1013
00:57:24,715 --> 00:57:27,115
and you've never been in a beef.
1014
00:57:27,117 --> 00:57:29,717
I guess you
know everything. Nah,
1015
00:57:29,719 --> 00:57:33,089
just a guy who's lookin' for
answers in a bottle.
1016
00:57:34,757 --> 00:57:39,827
Nope, not in that one.
1017
00:57:43,930 --> 00:57:48,500
So let me get this straight, you fake your
demise, your wife and kids get the money,
1018
00:57:48,501 --> 00:57:49,670
and you slip the bookie.
1019
00:57:49,671 --> 00:57:51,068
And the 27 G's I owe him.
1020
00:57:51,602 --> 00:57:54,772
And then what happens, you go into
the Loser Protection Program?
1021
00:57:55,806 --> 00:57:57,636
Give me the chum.
1022
00:57:59,042 --> 00:58:00,142
It's where you
were pissin', right?
1023
00:58:00,143 --> 00:58:04,513
Hey, hold on. Don't you think this is a
little rash? I mean, sure, you got problems,
1024
00:58:04,514 --> 00:58:07,152
big ones, but who doesn't? Sure
wish I'd paid more attention to
1025
00:58:07,153 --> 00:58:10,019
the Discovery Channel. I'd know
what these lizards like to eat.
1026
00:58:10,020 --> 00:58:11,978
Odds are it's not Hooters.
1027
00:58:11,986 --> 00:58:16,956
They're like sharks, they're opportunistic.
They'll eat whatever they can get.
1028
00:58:17,757 --> 00:58:19,487
Except chicken
wings, apparently.
1029
00:58:19,692 --> 00:58:21,161
The Discovery Channel
is awesome.
1030
00:58:21,162 --> 00:58:23,129
I remember watchin'
this one about panda bears.
1031
00:58:23,130 --> 00:58:27,228
Apparently panda bears have very low
libidos, so these poor Japanese bastards...
1032
00:58:27,232 --> 00:58:29,199
- Chinese.
- Huh?
1033
00:58:29,200 --> 00:58:30,670
Pandas are in China.
1034
00:58:31,802 --> 00:58:34,202
Chinese, Japanese, Charlie is Charlie.
The point is,
1035
00:58:34,204 --> 00:58:38,244
is that they spend all day showing 'em
movies of other pandas getting busy.
1036
00:58:39,041 --> 00:58:39,811
Panda porn.
1037
00:58:39,812 --> 00:58:43,038
Panda porn? That's the stupidest
thing I've ever heard of.
1038
00:58:43,844 --> 00:58:45,010
Till this.
1039
00:58:45,011 --> 00:58:46,681
So where you gonna go?
1040
00:58:47,079 --> 00:58:49,609
I dunno. Exile.
1041
00:58:49,947 --> 00:58:52,277
Where's that? In Mexico?
1042
00:58:53,082 --> 00:58:56,152
What about us? Are we ever
gonna see each other again?
1043
00:58:56,818 --> 00:58:58,178
Guess not.
1044
00:58:58,186 --> 00:58:59,616
Ever?
1045
00:59:00,187 --> 00:59:01,587
I don't see how.
1046
00:59:04,591 --> 00:59:07,761
Well that settles it.
We go, we go together.
1047
00:59:09,595 --> 00:59:11,655
- To exile.
- Exile.
1048
00:59:12,030 --> 00:59:15,130
All right, gentlemen,
we are officially in business.
1049
00:59:18,002 --> 00:59:20,272
Okay, here's the play.
1050
00:59:20,637 --> 00:59:22,267
I wind it up to 120 RPMs.
1051
00:59:22,271 --> 00:59:24,771
Kick it back down into second,
lock her up in the gravel.
1052
00:59:24,773 --> 00:59:27,843
She stops in a power slide
10 feet shy of the swamp.
1053
00:59:28,142 --> 00:59:29,542
We push her in from there.
1054
00:59:29,543 --> 00:59:30,313
That's pretty fast.
1055
00:59:30,314 --> 00:59:32,780
We gotta make it look
like an accident, right?
1056
00:59:32,781 --> 00:59:35,749
You sure you can stop in time?
It's a Fury.
1057
00:59:35,750 --> 00:59:37,848
I can stop this baby on a dime.
1058
00:59:37,850 --> 00:59:40,680
I'm thinking we should
salvage some things.
1059
00:59:41,153 --> 00:59:43,191
Definitely get some cash
for these rims.
1060
00:59:43,192 --> 00:59:45,088
Sure, maybe there's
a swap meet Saturday.
1061
00:59:45,089 --> 00:59:46,149
This is the South, man.
1062
00:59:46,156 --> 00:59:50,016
Rims are like currency down here. They pass
'em down from generation to generation,
1063
00:59:50,026 --> 00:59:50,916
like heirlooms.
1064
00:59:50,926 --> 00:59:53,286
Mark... We should
yank the stereo too.
1065
00:59:53,295 --> 00:59:55,725
It's no Sanyo box, Blaupunkt.
1066
00:59:55,730 --> 00:59:58,160
Like Mercedes.
German gear keeps its value.
1067
00:59:58,165 --> 00:59:59,825
Wait a second.
For this to work,
1068
00:59:59,833 --> 01:00:03,068
the car has to go in as-is,
end of discussion.
1069
01:00:03,069 --> 01:00:06,299
Fine, I lose my car,
guitar gets wet too.
1070
01:00:06,305 --> 01:00:09,805
Leave her out of it. No way,
if Fury goes, guitar goes.
1071
01:00:09,808 --> 01:00:11,008
Why, 'cause you're a bad loser?
1072
01:00:11,009 --> 01:00:13,979
Well now, you show me a good loser,
and I'll show you a loser, loser.
1073
01:00:13,980 --> 01:00:19,108
It is only fair, we are supposed to
be dead. Think of the forensics.
1074
01:00:20,183 --> 01:00:21,716
Fine, she goes.
1075
01:00:21,717 --> 01:00:23,017
That's it?
1076
01:00:23,018 --> 01:00:26,118
Good for you. Way to stick
up for yourself.
1077
01:00:26,121 --> 01:00:28,961
Save some for the reptiles...
Please.
1078
01:00:29,357 --> 01:00:32,087
You know, I'm thinkin'? I should do it.
Do what?
1079
01:00:32,093 --> 01:00:35,193
I'm a professional driver. I drive
for a living. Give me the keys.
1080
01:00:35,196 --> 01:00:38,896
No way. There's only one
Joe who flies this bird.
1081
01:01:03,889 --> 01:01:05,219
Whoa.
1082
01:01:07,825 --> 01:01:09,055
Mark?
1083
01:01:14,864 --> 01:01:18,374
Where the hell is he?
He's gone.
1084
01:01:19,034 --> 01:01:20,004
Mark?
1085
01:01:20,005 --> 01:01:21,231
In the water!
1086
01:01:30,344 --> 01:01:31,684
Mark!
1087
01:01:35,013 --> 01:01:36,713
Did you see that power roll?
1088
01:01:36,714 --> 01:01:37,747
Off the hook.
1089
01:01:37,748 --> 01:01:40,678
All right, guys, if you don't mind,
we're in Wally Gator's swimming pool.
1090
01:01:40,684 --> 01:01:44,294
You see any?
You gotta look for their eyes.
1091
01:01:44,654 --> 01:01:46,094
I don't see any.
1092
01:01:46,755 --> 01:01:50,285
There!
He's got the chicken wings!
1093
01:01:51,759 --> 01:01:54,889
One, two, three.
1094
01:02:19,218 --> 01:02:21,918
Your sister's ass.
What?
1095
01:02:21,920 --> 01:02:24,750
Tell me you got those tickets
out of the glove box.
1096
01:02:25,723 --> 01:02:28,223
Oh. There's two words...
1097
01:02:28,225 --> 01:02:31,855
Labor Day party.
Sorry, guys, I didn't think.
1098
01:02:31,861 --> 01:02:34,091
Damn right you didn't think.
I don't get it.
1099
01:02:34,096 --> 01:02:37,026
How do you manage to screw
up so many times in one day?
1100
01:02:38,967 --> 01:02:40,727
I get up early.
1101
01:02:41,202 --> 01:02:42,942
You know what this means?
1102
01:02:43,404 --> 01:02:45,044
Somebody's gotta go in.
1103
01:02:46,939 --> 01:02:48,369
I'll do it.
1104
01:02:55,045 --> 01:02:56,705
Pretty ballsy, huh?
1105
01:03:01,484 --> 01:03:04,052
Did you see that?
Oh, no.
1106
01:03:04,053 --> 01:03:05,493
Hey, this is bad.
1107
01:03:11,225 --> 01:03:13,755
Wow!
1108
01:03:13,926 --> 01:03:15,826
Oh, man!
1109
01:04:21,891 --> 01:04:25,131
Just a few minutes to go, and
Times Square is coming to a boil...
1110
01:04:25,132 --> 01:04:29,427
I know what we need.
How about it? To, uh...
1111
01:04:29,431 --> 01:04:30,798
The afterlife.
1112
01:04:30,799 --> 01:04:32,166
The afterlife, that's good.
1113
01:04:32,167 --> 01:04:33,867
You know they say the way you
spend your New Year's Eve
1114
01:04:33,868 --> 01:04:35,068
is the way your
whole year's gonna go.
1115
01:04:35,069 --> 01:04:37,399
Really? Is that what
they say? Because I...
1116
01:04:37,404 --> 01:04:41,511
I feel great. Honest to God, I'm feeling
liberated, I'm feeling renewed.
1117
01:04:41,512 --> 01:04:44,508
Like Butch and Sundance. Butch and
Sundance? Didn't they get shot?
1118
01:04:44,511 --> 01:04:48,311
Yeah, but with their boots on. Come
on, let's go, I'm thirsty. Today.
1119
01:04:48,314 --> 01:04:51,354
It's stuck.
Give me this.
1120
01:04:53,819 --> 01:04:54,519
Hey!
1121
01:04:54,520 --> 01:04:56,389
I wanna propose a toast.
1122
01:04:57,821 --> 01:04:59,590
New leaf, we got a clean slate.
1123
01:04:59,591 --> 01:05:02,289
I say we take advantage of it and
start living like philosophers.
1124
01:05:02,291 --> 01:05:08,496
No more mincin' words or dancin' around.
You see a thing, you name a thing.
1125
01:05:08,497 --> 01:05:10,357
What the hell are you
talking about?
1126
01:05:11,132 --> 01:05:13,332
Yeah, I'm gonna live
more true. More honest.
1127
01:05:13,867 --> 01:05:17,997
New me's gonna be a straight shooter.
Oh, okay then. Me too.
1128
01:05:18,004 --> 01:05:22,207
Straight shooter. Me too! You
gotta stop being a parrot, man.
1129
01:05:22,208 --> 01:05:25,078
You're always doin' that. You can't
do that. You just... You chime in,
1130
01:05:25,079 --> 01:05:28,507
you just agree with everybody right away.
All right, that's fair...
1131
01:05:28,513 --> 01:05:30,613
That's what I'm talking about.
1132
01:05:30,615 --> 01:05:32,245
Polly want a cracker?
1133
01:05:32,249 --> 01:05:36,418
Okay, now remember when you point that
finger, you got four pointed back at you.
1134
01:05:36,419 --> 01:05:38,089
Take Billy here,
he's the perfect example.
1135
01:05:38,090 --> 01:05:42,056
He backs down to everybody. He's got
more footprints on him than a treadmill.
1136
01:05:42,057 --> 01:05:44,887
All right, just give me some
bubbles. No therapy, please.
1137
01:05:44,893 --> 01:05:46,162
No therapy, just the truth.
1138
01:05:46,163 --> 01:05:51,130
You tell me right now. What is it gonna take
for you to finally stand up for yourself?
1139
01:05:52,332 --> 01:05:55,332
Thank you for that insightful
counsel, Dr. Freud.
1140
01:05:55,335 --> 01:05:57,865
Now what's it gonna take for you
to shut your know-it-all yap and
1141
01:05:57,870 --> 01:06:01,040
let me enjoy this outstanding beverage?
Pucker up and blow me.
1142
01:06:01,041 --> 01:06:04,939
I knew I should have killed myself
alone. Okay, guys, why don't we...
1143
01:06:04,942 --> 01:06:08,511
Wind it down a little bit, get some sleep.
We got a big game tomorrow.
1144
01:06:08,512 --> 01:06:13,052
Hey, Billy. Think that douche in the shitter
was the only one nailing your wife?
1145
01:06:18,254 --> 01:06:23,424
Okay, Captain Honest, you got
something to say? Finish the thought.
1146
01:06:23,658 --> 01:06:26,558
Let's just say there were other
passengers on that flight.
1147
01:06:27,060 --> 01:06:29,630
Fuck you. What are you saying?
You banged my wife?
1148
01:06:30,496 --> 01:06:32,996
Guys, why don't we just...
Shut up.
1149
01:06:33,431 --> 01:06:35,101
Did you bang my wife?
1150
01:06:35,999 --> 01:06:37,599
Tell me you're lying.
1151
01:06:37,600 --> 01:06:39,400
Or what, Billy?
1152
01:06:40,068 --> 01:06:44,938
Are you going to hit me? Tell me
you're lying, or tell me good-bye.
1153
01:06:46,440 --> 01:06:48,110
This is so wrong.
1154
01:07:11,498 --> 01:07:13,398
What the hell did you do...
1155
01:07:14,500 --> 01:07:16,200
All the women you could
get, why the hell...
1156
01:07:16,201 --> 01:07:19,071
Relax, I never touched his wife.
1157
01:07:28,679 --> 01:07:30,009
Then why did you...
1158
01:07:30,013 --> 01:07:31,380
He's pathetic.
1159
01:07:31,381 --> 01:07:35,450
I'm trying to get him to stand up for
himself. I'm trying to help him.
1160
01:07:35,451 --> 01:07:37,551
You're a mess.
Help yourself.
1161
01:07:37,554 --> 01:07:40,088
Oh, look, Dweezil, give me a break...
Yeah, I'm a clerk.
1162
01:07:40,089 --> 01:07:41,459
Sells whiteout
and envelopes, okay.
1163
01:07:41,460 --> 01:07:46,187
I can't get a girl, my mother's a bitch.
You got me, dead to rights.
1164
01:07:49,565 --> 01:07:53,825
And now that that's cleared up, why don't
you have a quick look at yourself.
1165
01:07:57,237 --> 01:08:01,437
You're the coolest guy
I ever met, hands down.
1166
01:08:01,441 --> 01:08:06,411
Could dunk a basketball flat-footed,
could talk a girl down to her Jockeys.
1167
01:08:06,412 --> 01:08:09,312
Make anybody think
his jokes are funny.
1168
01:08:11,549 --> 01:08:13,679
The man everybody wanted to be.
1169
01:08:20,590 --> 01:08:22,859
With all of that, you throw
your money away gambling,
1170
01:08:22,860 --> 01:08:26,488
you let your family slip through
your fingers, and now...
1171
01:08:27,094 --> 01:08:29,794
You run off the two best
friends you've ever had.
1172
01:08:31,297 --> 01:08:32,727
I'd ask why,
1173
01:08:33,364 --> 01:08:35,564
but then I'm kinda past caring.
1174
01:08:42,406 --> 01:08:43,836
Happy New Year.
1175
01:08:58,152 --> 01:09:00,752
Two sugars, no NutraSweet,
1176
01:09:00,754 --> 01:09:02,824
and that's the way
it's gonna be.
1177
01:09:06,692 --> 01:09:08,259
Hey!
1178
01:09:08,260 --> 01:09:09,730
Oops.
1179
01:09:10,695 --> 01:09:12,655
You stupid, little son of a bitch.
Sorry, sir.
1180
01:09:12,663 --> 01:09:14,663
Now get down here
and clean this up!
1181
01:09:15,499 --> 01:09:18,599
Hey, get down here
and clean this up!
1182
01:09:36,786 --> 01:09:38,316
Whoo!
1183
01:09:40,689 --> 01:09:43,219
What are you doing, huh?
1184
01:09:43,224 --> 01:09:47,334
Good catch, buddy.
Ready? Down one, hike!
1185
01:09:47,461 --> 01:09:48,591
Kid's got hands.
1186
01:09:48,595 --> 01:09:49,785
And he's got heart.
1187
01:09:49,796 --> 01:09:52,556
Loves the game. Who's
he rootin' for tonight?
1188
01:09:52,565 --> 01:09:57,365
Ah, we don't have tickets. He just
loves to soak up the atmosphere.
1189
01:09:57,369 --> 01:09:59,639
Says he's gonna play
in this stadium someday.
1190
01:10:00,337 --> 01:10:01,497
I hope he gets to.
1191
01:10:09,545 --> 01:10:12,445
Yo, who's got tickets? I
need some tickets over here.
1192
01:10:12,447 --> 01:10:16,477
- Who's selling? Who's selling?
- Yo, need two!
1193
01:10:16,717 --> 01:10:18,747
Who's got two?
1194
01:10:18,752 --> 01:10:19,782
Oh, my God.
1195
01:10:19,786 --> 01:10:22,946
I'll give you $500 a piece,
right now.
1196
01:10:23,588 --> 01:10:25,888
$1,500, you gotta make a move.
1197
01:10:29,193 --> 01:10:31,327
Why don't you paint that thing?
1198
01:10:31,328 --> 01:10:33,458
It's earth tone, one of a kind.
1199
01:10:33,463 --> 01:10:35,563
Well, you better wear a
helmet, they'll write you.
1200
01:10:35,565 --> 01:10:36,925
I got a hard head.
1201
01:10:43,372 --> 01:10:44,572
We can't afford these.
1202
01:10:44,573 --> 01:10:46,213
Sure you can, they're on me.
1203
01:10:46,807 --> 01:10:49,867
Just leave me one when he comes
back and suits up some day.
1204
01:10:52,745 --> 01:10:53,875
Hey,
1205
01:10:54,713 --> 01:10:56,353
what's your name?
1206
01:10:56,613 --> 01:10:59,448
For the tickets someday.
1207
01:11:14,863 --> 01:11:17,431
Did you see that?
Nothing but cork.
1208
01:11:17,432 --> 01:11:20,932
Two triples and a bull.
This girl is unbelievable.
1209
01:11:20,935 --> 01:11:22,395
Talk to her.
1210
01:11:27,408 --> 01:11:30,908
Classic Tudor with a high finish.
You do that beautifully.
1211
01:11:30,911 --> 01:11:34,651
I like to think that it's Creole, tutored
by way of Lake Charles, Louisiana.
1212
01:11:34,652 --> 01:11:35,848
Hi, I'm Jason.
1213
01:11:35,849 --> 01:11:37,249
Janice.
1214
01:11:37,783 --> 01:11:40,451
May I have the honor of a match?
1215
01:11:40,452 --> 01:11:43,692
I yield the lane to the challenger.
Hmm.
1216
01:11:44,021 --> 01:11:45,851
I accept the courtesy.
1217
01:11:48,959 --> 01:11:53,589
Tungsten Devastators with the
spinning Hammer Head flights.
1218
01:11:54,430 --> 01:11:55,596
Sweet!
1219
01:11:55,597 --> 01:11:57,027
They're not for everyone.
1220
01:11:57,031 --> 01:11:59,461
I could do some
damage with these.
1221
01:12:02,735 --> 01:12:04,365
Nice balance.
1222
01:12:04,802 --> 01:12:06,332
The R-182 shafts.
1223
01:12:06,336 --> 01:12:07,736
I'm thirsty.
1224
01:12:07,737 --> 01:12:09,037
Want a cold one?
1225
01:12:11,540 --> 01:12:13,570
Getting me a beer?
1226
01:12:18,845 --> 01:12:22,645
Can't find your seat? I'm looking for my
husband, he's supposed to be right here
1227
01:12:22,648 --> 01:12:24,008
in these seats.
1228
01:12:24,016 --> 01:12:25,446
Is his name Mark?
1229
01:12:25,450 --> 01:12:29,050
And now, America,
Miss Vanna White!
1230
01:12:37,026 --> 01:12:41,396
♪ Oh, say can you see
1231
01:12:41,397 --> 01:12:44,497
♪ By the dawn's
early light... ♪
1232
01:12:49,338 --> 01:12:51,398
The spectacular
wreckage of an ancient Plymouth Fury
1233
01:12:51,406 --> 01:12:54,036
was pulled from the swamp on
Country Road 61, near Beecham...
1234
01:12:54,041 --> 01:12:55,941
No sign of survivors...
1235
01:12:55,942 --> 01:12:57,642
I knew those guys.
1236
01:12:59,544 --> 01:13:00,944
Best friends I ever had.
1237
01:13:01,578 --> 01:13:02,838
Cold ones.
1238
01:13:02,845 --> 01:13:04,705
I'll take a beer.
1239
01:13:05,680 --> 01:13:06,950
Keep it.
1240
01:13:07,580 --> 01:13:08,880
Thanks.
1241
01:13:11,917 --> 01:13:14,717
Big cats. Melville.
1242
01:13:35,506 --> 01:13:37,566
Hey, more guitar.
Up.
1243
01:13:38,374 --> 01:13:41,014
One, two, three!
1244
01:13:42,343 --> 01:13:43,843
One triple away.
1245
01:13:45,478 --> 01:13:46,538
Well struck, grasshopper.
1246
01:13:46,545 --> 01:13:51,545
Oh, well I've spent much time snatching
the pebble from the serpent's maw.
1247
01:13:53,018 --> 01:13:56,818
Hey, look at that guy over there. He's got
a hearing aid the size of a lawn mower
1248
01:13:56,821 --> 01:13:57,851
stuck to his head.
1249
01:13:57,855 --> 01:13:59,785
And he has it on high.
1250
01:14:01,057 --> 01:14:02,557
Oh, shit.
1251
01:14:04,660 --> 01:14:06,560
You again.
1252
01:14:06,561 --> 01:14:09,431
You know what it cost me
to detail that car?
1253
01:14:09,432 --> 01:14:10,560
It was an accident.
1254
01:14:10,564 --> 01:14:11,664
Uh-huh.
1255
01:14:11,665 --> 01:14:14,065
It looks like we're up next.
Well, uh...
1256
01:14:14,067 --> 01:14:16,827
Please go ahead, because
we were just messing around.
1257
01:14:16,836 --> 01:14:18,796
You can have it.
We want a match with you.
1258
01:14:18,804 --> 01:14:21,404
We accept. What do you
want to play for?
1259
01:14:21,406 --> 01:14:22,736
How about $10 cricket?
1260
01:14:22,740 --> 01:14:23,770
Cricket?
1261
01:14:23,774 --> 01:14:27,384
Do I look like I want to spend time with
you? All I want to do is take your money.
1262
01:14:27,385 --> 01:14:29,377
First bull's-eye,
50 bucks.
1263
01:14:29,746 --> 01:14:31,576
Okay, I'll lead off.
1264
01:14:32,048 --> 01:14:33,608
- I'll call you when I need you.
- Hey.
1265
01:14:33,616 --> 01:14:36,976
I got a score to settle with your
little comedian friend here.
1266
01:14:36,986 --> 01:14:39,686
I wanna see him shoot. Yeah,
shit or get off the pot.
1267
01:14:44,758 --> 01:14:48,427
Bet you 100 bucks he can hit
a dime on my forehead.
1268
01:14:48,428 --> 01:14:49,028
Are you nuts?
1269
01:14:49,029 --> 01:14:51,658
I've seen you shoot. It's like
throwing a rock in the ocean.
1270
01:14:51,663 --> 01:14:56,003
I'll take that bet. Oh, no, uh...
We're not doing this.
1271
01:14:56,767 --> 01:14:59,867
What's the matter,
chuckles? Chicken?
1272
01:15:00,904 --> 01:15:03,104
Pedro, where's the ice?
1273
01:15:03,106 --> 01:15:04,406
Jason...
1274
01:15:06,509 --> 01:15:08,079
I trust you.
1275
01:15:11,046 --> 01:15:12,746
Move.
1276
01:15:27,194 --> 01:15:31,434
No cheating. I don't
need to cheat, you clowns.
1277
01:15:32,031 --> 01:15:33,831
Lock and fire on it.
1278
01:16:12,035 --> 01:16:13,195
Good shot.
1279
01:16:13,636 --> 01:16:15,866
Pay the man his hundy.
1280
01:16:15,971 --> 01:16:18,201
Two out of three.
1281
01:16:18,206 --> 01:16:19,706
That's funny.
1282
01:16:19,707 --> 01:16:23,776
You know, there's three ways
that I can tell a jerkoff.
1283
01:16:23,777 --> 01:16:27,247
One, was O.J. guilty?
Two, Coke or Pepsi?
1284
01:16:27,580 --> 01:16:29,080
And I forgot the third one.
1285
01:16:30,015 --> 01:16:32,215
Bull's-eye.
1286
01:16:32,217 --> 01:16:34,117
- That went well.
- Leave him alone!
1287
01:16:34,118 --> 01:16:35,318
Zip it.
1288
01:16:35,319 --> 01:16:37,787
Okay, come on if you're comin'.
1289
01:16:37,788 --> 01:16:39,218
There's five of us
and one of you.
1290
01:16:39,222 --> 01:16:40,752
Two...
1291
01:16:40,756 --> 01:16:44,116
Of us. And I don't
like your chances.
1292
01:16:44,126 --> 01:16:45,886
We're gonna kill you guys.
1293
01:16:45,894 --> 01:16:49,196
Too late, we've already
been dead 11 hours.
1294
01:16:49,197 --> 01:16:51,827
Welcome back to the male species.
Nice to have you back.
1295
01:16:51,832 --> 01:16:54,332
What are you talking about? You think
I'm doing this because of you?
1296
01:16:54,334 --> 01:16:56,734
Fight!
1297
01:16:56,736 --> 01:16:58,336
Come on, bring it.
Come, on.
1298
01:16:58,337 --> 01:17:00,067
Yeah? Billy!
1299
01:17:00,238 --> 01:17:01,638
Huh?
1300
01:17:01,639 --> 01:17:04,939
Hit him!
Billy, hit him!
1301
01:17:06,143 --> 01:17:07,743
Go!
1302
01:17:12,647 --> 01:17:13,947
Come on...
1303
01:17:15,149 --> 01:17:17,819
Let go! Bastards!
1304
01:17:19,953 --> 01:17:22,993
Wow, I think it kicks ass.
1305
01:17:23,656 --> 01:17:24,956
Headin' out tonight.
1306
01:17:24,957 --> 01:17:26,357
As fast as you can.
1307
01:17:26,358 --> 01:17:27,858
Don't start with me.
1308
01:17:27,859 --> 01:17:29,059
Far be it for me...
1309
01:17:29,060 --> 01:17:32,760
You never stop, do you? Okay,
come on, guys. Enough already.
1310
01:17:33,330 --> 01:17:36,300
Come on, Billy, we got the motel room
for one more night. Let's just...
1311
01:17:36,301 --> 01:17:40,669
Go out on a good note. No.
I'm gonna get rolling north.
1312
01:17:40,670 --> 01:17:42,100
Back home.
1313
01:17:42,704 --> 01:17:44,104
All right.
1314
01:17:48,409 --> 01:17:50,879
I'm gonna go for a nightcap.
You wanna come?
1315
01:17:50,880 --> 01:17:52,978
No, I'm done.
I'll go home.
1316
01:17:52,980 --> 01:17:54,110
Okay.
1317
01:17:57,415 --> 01:17:59,145
Hey, I was wondering...
1318
01:18:00,317 --> 01:18:03,817
What's it gonna take, huh?
1319
01:18:23,872 --> 01:18:25,972
I'll show you what
it's gonna take.
1320
01:18:40,989 --> 01:18:43,757
Mark! Hey, Mark! Me!
1321
01:18:43,758 --> 01:18:45,088
Congratulations, you win.
1322
01:18:45,092 --> 01:18:49,462
You're making me do something I thought
I'd never do, raise my hand to a friend!
1323
01:18:50,130 --> 01:18:52,900
Well, come on out!
Dick!
1324
01:18:55,434 --> 01:18:58,474
You know not everybody has the same
definition about what it takes to make a man,
1325
01:18:58,475 --> 01:19:01,040
I mean, sometimes
it takes more guts to...
1326
01:19:01,706 --> 01:19:04,366
Maybe there'd be a little more
peace in the world if...
1327
01:19:06,176 --> 01:19:08,036
But not tonight.
1328
01:19:08,044 --> 01:19:11,484
You get your know-it-all, control freak,
make-your-friends-Mike-Tyson ass
1329
01:19:11,485 --> 01:19:14,350
out here now!
Let's do what we gotta do!
1330
01:19:14,716 --> 01:19:18,416
I am so sick and tired
of this macho bullshit!
1331
01:19:19,353 --> 01:19:20,753
Come on!
1332
01:19:23,490 --> 01:19:25,990
All right, we'll do it in there.
1333
01:20:31,455 --> 01:20:35,155
He's testing every
time you give in. I know.
1334
01:20:35,158 --> 01:20:38,528
Try taking away a toy, and if
he doesn't stop, it's time out.
1335
01:20:40,897 --> 01:20:44,027
I know he's headstrong.
But you have to be firm.
1336
01:20:49,938 --> 01:20:51,338
Here you go, Jason.
1337
01:20:53,974 --> 01:20:57,014
I... I forgot
the NutraSweet.
1338
01:20:57,543 --> 01:21:00,413
That's over.
I don't use it anymore.
1339
01:21:01,312 --> 01:21:02,912
Where's mine?
1340
01:21:04,848 --> 01:21:06,148
You were sleeping.
1341
01:21:07,517 --> 01:21:09,377
Weren't sleepin', I'd say.
1342
01:21:12,488 --> 01:21:17,888
It's like... It's like you took
a bullet that was meant for me.
1343
01:21:21,463 --> 01:21:23,063
I'm so sorry, Billy.
1344
01:21:25,266 --> 01:21:26,496
How's that?
1345
01:21:26,500 --> 01:21:28,170
Enough with the pillows.
1346
01:21:28,835 --> 01:21:29,925
Please.
1347
01:21:37,910 --> 01:21:39,610
I never touched Kate.
1348
01:21:40,445 --> 01:21:42,075
I would never do that.
1349
01:21:43,180 --> 01:21:45,410
But this is so wrong.
1350
01:21:45,415 --> 01:21:48,415
I'm in a whole 'nother
universe of wrong here.
1351
01:21:49,051 --> 01:21:53,051
And I gotta tell you, I gotta...
And you too, Jason...
1352
01:21:55,490 --> 01:21:57,920
I failed you guys so completely.
1353
01:21:59,259 --> 01:22:00,589
I failed myself.
1354
01:22:01,894 --> 01:22:04,528
I have been a total
horse's ass, and
1355
01:22:04,529 --> 01:22:07,159
all you guys do is stick by me.
1356
01:22:07,397 --> 01:22:10,297
They used to think I was
so good under pressure.
1357
01:22:11,166 --> 01:22:15,566
And it turns out that I'm the
one who folds it every time.
1358
01:22:16,237 --> 01:22:17,897
Like a coward.
1359
01:22:20,908 --> 01:22:23,608
Never wanted anybody's help,
God forbid.
1360
01:22:25,545 --> 01:22:27,235
But I was wrong.
1361
01:22:29,514 --> 01:22:31,054
I need you.
1362
01:22:32,582 --> 01:22:34,416
I need you, Jason.
1363
01:22:34,417 --> 01:22:38,217
I need you to help me to stop
blaming everybody else for my...
1364
01:22:41,122 --> 01:22:44,962
Disappointments. And all I
can tell you is thank you.
1365
01:22:46,293 --> 01:22:48,993
Thank you for helping me
realize what's important.
1366
01:22:50,396 --> 01:22:52,156
Being one of you guys,
1367
01:22:53,131 --> 01:22:54,401
being a good husband to Sher.
1368
01:22:55,932 --> 01:22:57,462
And a good father to Hayden.
1369
01:23:00,101 --> 01:23:02,371
I am so sorry.
1370
01:23:09,075 --> 01:23:10,465
Hey.
1371
01:24:07,098 --> 01:24:09,968
Sherry, it's completely over.
1372
01:24:10,200 --> 01:24:14,300
I set up a payment schedule,
and it's done.
1373
01:24:14,470 --> 01:24:16,970
You two are
the center of my life.
1374
01:24:16,972 --> 01:24:23,142
Please give me a chance to prove
that I can change. Please.
1375
01:24:25,446 --> 01:24:29,346
You think she'll listen to me?
Yes, Daddy, I think she will.
1376
01:24:30,149 --> 01:24:34,479
Hey, get in here, you two.
1377
01:24:36,521 --> 01:24:38,191
Let's go.
1378
01:24:53,437 --> 01:24:55,567
Hey, Billy.
Scarlet.
1379
01:24:56,272 --> 01:24:57,772
New bike, huh?
1380
01:24:57,773 --> 01:25:00,040
Yeah, makin' some changes.
1381
01:25:00,041 --> 01:25:02,341
Traded in 18 wheels for two.
1382
01:25:02,343 --> 01:25:04,613
Changes... Huh.
1383
01:25:06,679 --> 01:25:08,346
Got some miles on it.
1384
01:25:08,347 --> 01:25:09,777
Who doesn't?
1385
01:25:13,751 --> 01:25:15,181
Cold?
1386
01:25:19,556 --> 01:25:21,086
Take 'em.
1387
01:25:25,194 --> 01:25:26,561
What happened here?
1388
01:25:26,562 --> 01:25:28,232
It's a long story.
1389
01:25:34,035 --> 01:25:35,395
Get on.
1390
01:25:35,403 --> 01:25:37,070
I've got work.
1391
01:25:37,071 --> 01:25:39,371
Uh-uh. Your shift's over.
1392
01:25:40,340 --> 01:25:41,470
You mean it?
1393
01:25:41,474 --> 01:25:42,774
You bet I do.
104934
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