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1
00:00:00,042 --> 00:00:03,132
(BUBBLING)
2
00:00:03,253 --> 00:00:04,843
-(SONG BEGINS)
-One, two, three, four
3
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:06,465
Who's that knocking at my door?
4
00:00:06,632 --> 00:00:08,092
Five, six, seven, eight
5
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:09,800
Hurry up and don't be late
6
00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:11,388
Nine, ten, eleven, twelve
7
00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:13,223
Got a secret I can't tell
8
00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:14,847
Flap your fins, flip your tail
9
00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:16,183
School's out, ring the bell!
10
00:00:16,391 --> 00:00:17,891
La, la, la, la
11
00:00:18,227 --> 00:00:19,767
Ooh
12
00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:21,438
La, la, la, la
13
00:00:21,605 --> 00:00:22,935
Ooh
14
00:00:23,148 --> 00:00:24,438
La, la, la, la
15
00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:26,243
Ooh
16
00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:28,195
La, la, la, la
17
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:29,740
Ooh
18
00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:31,281
One, two, three, four
19
00:00:31,490 --> 00:00:32,820
Who's that knocking at my door?
20
00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:34,536
Five, six, seven, eight
21
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:36,081
Hurry up and don't be late
22
00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:37,538
Nine, ten, eleven, twelve
23
00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:39,540
Got a secret I can't tell
24
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,166
Flap your fins, flip your tail!
25
00:00:41,333 --> 00:00:42,833
School's out, ring the bell!
26
00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:44,131
(SONG ENDS)
27
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:47,296
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
28
00:00:56,431 --> 00:00:58,231
(BICYCLE BELL RINGING)
29
00:00:58,809 --> 00:00:59,889
Whoa!
30
00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:04,362
-Hey, hon.
-Yeah, hon?
31
00:01:04,523 --> 00:01:07,283
-I love you.
-I love you more.
32
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,202
-I love you more, more.
-I love you more, more, more!
33
00:01:10,362 --> 00:01:13,912
-Hey, guess what?
-I love you more times infinity.
34
00:01:14,157 --> 00:01:15,197
Not possible, hon.
35
00:01:15,367 --> 00:01:17,907
I love you more than the moon
and the stars and the planets...
36
00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:19,535
BEA'S DAD: Not possible more!
37
00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:22,331
'Cause I love you more
than all the grilled cheese sandwiches...
38
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:23,956
I said, "Guess what!"
39
00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:26,456
I have an audition today.
40
00:01:28,046 --> 00:01:30,416
An audition for a commercial.
41
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,841
Aud... What? What's wrong?
42
00:01:33,051 --> 00:01:34,851
-Oh, Honey.
-Oh, Honey.
43
00:01:35,137 --> 00:01:36,217
-Oh!
-Oh!
44
00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:38,641
BOTH: Oh, honey, honey pie.
45
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:40,675
J... Just say what you need to say,
please.
46
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,557
It's just that acting
can be such a hard life,
47
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what with the rejection,
the broken dreams,
48
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the living off canned beans.
49
00:01:48,567 --> 00:01:52,107
Aw, what do you say we find you
a new hobby, like trivia?
50
00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:55,319
That's my hobby,
and it's never let me down.
51
00:01:55,490 --> 00:02:00,950
"Did you know that a cow gives at least
200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime?"
52
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:02,159
-(COW SCREAMS)
-(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
53
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:06,457
A hobby? Acting is not a hobby!
It is my life!
54
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:11,007
And this commercial at the Hokey Poke
is like a gateway to my career.
55
00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:14,890
It's gonna be on TV, Mom.
T! V!
56
00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:17,393
Oh, Bea, we're just looking out for you.
57
00:02:17,721 --> 00:02:19,771
Mother, if you want to look out for me,
58
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,773
you'd best turn on your television,
59
00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:23,312
because that's where you'll find me.
60
00:02:26,063 --> 00:02:27,443
-CHIEF: Next!
-Aw!
61
00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:29,442
-"Delicious!"
-"Deciduous."
62
00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:30,941
-"De..."
-"...lic..."
63
00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:34,449
-"...ious."
-Uh, is this the line for the bathroom?
64
00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:37,491
-I am a delicious burger.
-CHIEF: Next!
65
00:02:37,658 --> 00:02:38,698
(SOBS)
66
00:02:39,451 --> 00:02:41,951
Looks like the auditions
for the Chief's Hokey Poke commercials
67
00:02:42,079 --> 00:02:43,499
are going really well.
68
00:02:43,830 --> 00:02:47,420
And on an unrelated note,
I've discovered glue!
69
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,879
(EXCLAIMS)
It's sticky.
70
00:02:50,796 --> 00:02:53,666
So, Bea, are you nervous?
71
00:02:53,757 --> 00:02:55,507
Me? Nervous?
72
00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:58,678
(GASPS) Oh my gosh, yes!
73
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,510
This commercial could be my big chance
74
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,771
to show my parents
that acting is a valid career choice.
75
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,354
I've never worked so hard for a role.
76
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:10,356
Just to research the role,
I spent the last month
77
00:03:10,607 --> 00:03:12,147
working in the kitchen with Chief
78
00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:15,109
disguised as a busboy
name Bob Hirohito.
79
00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:16,360
(YELLS)
80
00:03:20,826 --> 00:03:22,406
I just hope I can pull it off.
81
00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:26,707
Bea, you just gotta go into that audition
and knock them on their tail fins.
82
00:03:26,832 --> 00:03:27,922
Milo's right.
83
00:03:28,083 --> 00:03:30,383
Once your parents see
how awesome you are in this commercial,
84
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:31,884
they'll totally support you.
85
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:34,415
You guys really think so?
You think I'm good enough?
86
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:39,465
To remind you of how great you really are,
I glued a motivational collage.
87
00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:42,055
See? It says "Good luck, Bea..."
88
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,217
somewhere off to the side there.
89
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:47,345
-Uh, thanks, Milo.
-Don't thank me, Bea.
90
00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:48,812
Thank glue!
91
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,400
-Next!
-I'm up!
92
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:52,645
Break a fin, Bea.
93
00:03:53,024 --> 00:03:54,034
Hello, Chief.
94
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,784
-I am here for my audit...
-Sit down!
95
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:59,527
All right, let's get this over with.
96
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:03,945
Hokey Poke food is delicious.
97
00:04:04,202 --> 00:04:06,582
-CHIEF: Audition's over.
-Do I get the part?
98
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:08,957
Bassy, how many more
we got waiting in line?
99
00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:11,634
-She's the last one.
-All right, kid, you got the part.
100
00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:14,343
-Oh, my gosh!
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
101
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,304
We'll have you up and riding
scorpions by tomorrow.
102
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:18,594
(LAUGHS)
103
00:04:18,759 --> 00:04:22,179
Yeah, riding scorpions! Whoa, whoa,
wait a minute. Scorpions?
104
00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:26,894
For the commercial. See? Scorpions,
diner food... it all makes sense.
105
00:04:27,184 --> 00:04:28,194
(GULPS)
106
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,768
You can ride a scorpion, can't you?
107
00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,024
Uh...
108
00:04:32,147 --> 00:04:33,147
Yes!
109
00:04:33,231 --> 00:04:36,321
I happen to not only be
a great actress,
110
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,986
but an expert scorpion rider as well.
111
00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,662
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
112
00:04:42,574 --> 00:04:43,584
Yeah.
113
00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:48,288
Bea, Bea, Bea, Bea, Bea.
114
00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:51,250
So you lied to the Chief
to be in the commercial?
115
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,213
I thought lying was something
you're not supposed to do,
116
00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:56,837
like sneezing and tooting
at the same time.
117
00:04:57,088 --> 00:04:58,878
It's not a lie.
118
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:02,389
I see this as a truth
that hasn't come true yet.
119
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:03,469
(SINGSONGS)
Diddly-doo!
120
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:05,715
But you always tell me not to lie.
121
00:05:05,889 --> 00:05:07,179
This is different
122
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:10,595
because I don't know
that I can't ride them yet, so...
123
00:05:10,685 --> 00:05:11,685
(SINGSONGS)
Diddly-doo!
124
00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:13,860
So you're saying it's okay to lie?
125
00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:16,189
(SINGSONGS) Diddly-doo!
Totally different situation!
126
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,436
This is not a problem
127
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:22,029
because I'm a smart girl,
and I do smart things.
128
00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:25,744
Now, let's go find some
dangerous scorpions and ride them.
129
00:05:25,909 --> 00:05:28,159
Hey, look! It's Bo Gregory!
130
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:30,463
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
131
00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:31,580
(GASP)
132
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,132
ALL: Ooh!
133
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:39,418
(SCORPION NEIGHS)
134
00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:41,423
(APPLAUSE)
135
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,928
That was amazing, Bo Gregory!
136
00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,721
Oh, 'tweren't nothing, Miss Bea.
137
00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:47,596
Lady Snugglesworth here
is our gentlest scorpion.
138
00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:49,434
(NEIGHS)
139
00:05:49,724 --> 00:05:51,024
Why don't y'all give her a whirl?
140
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:54,151
This doesn't seem so hard.
I can totally do this.
141
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,362
-Go, Bea!
-Yeah! Go, Bea! You can do it!
142
00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:57,769
It's easy, Miss Bea.
143
00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:01,861
All you gots to do is hunker down
and go like this.
144
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,028
(FARTS)
145
00:06:04,573 --> 00:06:07,623
Thanks, Bo Gregory,
but I am a trained actress
146
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,581
and I think I can take it from here.
147
00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:11,201
(GRUNTS)
148
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:12,834
All right. (GIGGLES)
149
00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,174
This doesn't seem so bad.
150
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:17,499
Now, all I have to do is say my line.
151
00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:19,842
Hokey Poke food is de...
152
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:20,921
(ROARS)
153
00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:23,836
(SCREAMING)
Make it stop! Make it stop!
154
00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:24,925
(GRUNTS)
155
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,258
This hurts so bad.
156
00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:29,723
-Oh, my gosh!
-Bea, are you okay?
157
00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:32,433
What? Oh, this? (LAUGHS)
158
00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:34,559
I meant to do this. (CHUCKLES)
159
00:06:34,644 --> 00:06:36,154
Diddly... (GROANS)
160
00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:38,234
Besides, you know what they say.
161
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,936
The best way to get over
falling off a scorpion
162
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:42,571
is to get back on it.
163
00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:44,028
Watch this.
164
00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:46,817
-Hokey Poke food is de...
-(SCORPION SCREECHES)
165
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,907
-(SCREAMS)
-(ALL GROAN)
166
00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:51,334
I'm okay. It's just dislocated.
167
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:53,621
-(JOINT POPS)
-I think I've got it now.
168
00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:56,629
-Hokey Poke food is...
-(SCORPION SCREECHES)
169
00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,208
(ALL GROAN)
170
00:06:58,293 --> 00:06:59,463
BEA: Ah! My nose.
171
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,920
(GRUNTS)
She's a feisty one, she is.
172
00:07:03,214 --> 00:07:07,894
But I've got her right where I want her.
173
00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:09,723
-Hokey... Oh, come on!
-(SCORPION SCREECHES)
174
00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:11,638
-(GROAN)
-Dang!
175
00:07:12,474 --> 00:07:13,484
(GROANS)
176
00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:14,888
What am I gonna do?
177
00:07:15,060 --> 00:07:17,270
Maybe my parents were right about trivia.
178
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,267
Maybe I'm not meant to be an actress.
179
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:23,068
MALE VOICE: (ON TV)
That is correct.
180
00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,611
Bananas are slightly radioactive.
181
00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:29,913
I knew that, Miss Pie. I know everything.
182
00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,953
(CATS MEOW)
183
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:35,867
-(CAT YOWLING)
-No, that cannot happen!
184
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:38,084
One way or another, I'll conquer this.
185
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:41,708
Scorpions, prepare to meet your master.
186
00:07:43,922 --> 00:07:46,512
(WAILS) Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.
187
00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:49,052
Bea's not here. Where is she, Milo?
188
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:51,679
Oscar! Chill out, bro!
189
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,678
-She'll be here.
-Hello, boys.
190
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:56,392
Mr. And Mrs. Goldfishberg,
have you seen Bea?
191
00:07:56,977 --> 00:07:58,187
Chill out, Oscar.
192
00:07:58,269 --> 00:07:59,939
We haven't seen her all morning.
193
00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:02,315
In fact, she told us to go on ahead.
194
00:08:02,565 --> 00:08:05,355
Said she had something
to take care of first.
195
00:08:05,610 --> 00:08:08,150
Well, whatever it is,
she... she's gonna be late.
196
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,372
-BEA: Chill out, Oscar.
-Bea?
197
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:13,453
Yeehaw!
198
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:14,825
-(GLASS SHATTERS)
-Let's do this.
199
00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:17,250
(ROARS)
200
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,580
-(ALL GASP)
-BEA'S DAD: Goodness!
201
00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:19,915
Whoop-de-doo.
202
00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:23,085
All right, take your places
and let's get cooking,
203
00:08:23,378 --> 00:08:24,418
not literally.
204
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,671
All right, Bea! You're riding a scorpion.
205
00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,716
You might say, I really "stuck" to it.
206
00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:33,295
(BOTH LAUGH) Yeah, "stuck."
207
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:35,562
What do you mean?
208
00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:41,064
What I mean is the audience won't be
the only ones "glued" to their seats.
209
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,561
-(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
-What?
210
00:08:42,731 --> 00:08:47,241
Ugh! I glued myself to the scorpion, okay?
With Milo's glue.
211
00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:51,704
Bea, that's crazy!
212
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:53,775
No, that's genius!
213
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:57,290
Oh man, oh man, what would we do
without glue?
214
00:08:57,454 --> 00:09:00,874
Not stick things together…
that's what we'd do.
215
00:09:01,166 --> 00:09:04,746
This was the only way to make sure
I don't fail in front of my parents.
216
00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:08,876
Now, if you'll excuse me,
a star is about to be born.
217
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:11,255
Okay, kid, it's very simple...
218
00:09:11,509 --> 00:09:16,429
Trot over to the table,
grab the food, say your line.
219
00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:18,599
-Got it?
-Got it!
220
00:09:18,933 --> 00:09:20,693
Scorpion, go now.
221
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,311
(SCORPION WHINNIES)
222
00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:25,687
Easy now. Easy, easy.
223
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:27,900
Achoo! (FARTS)
224
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,444
Oh no, the sneeze and toot.
225
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:30,527
Milo!
226
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:31,782
(ROARS)
227
00:09:31,863 --> 00:09:32,953
(ALL GASP)
228
00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:35,241
(SCREAMING)
229
00:09:37,535 --> 00:09:39,905
I thought scorpions
were supposed to be safe.
230
00:09:40,038 --> 00:09:41,458
Whoa... Whoa!
231
00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:43,923
This is awful! (SCREAMS)
232
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,290
Bea, honey, get off that scorpion!
233
00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:49,627
She can't, Mrs. G. She's glued to it.
234
00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:52,129
Oh, no! My baby!
235
00:09:52,467 --> 00:09:54,177
Whoa! (YELPS)
236
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:55,430
(GASPS)
What have I done?
237
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:58,560
I bet a trivia buff would never
be in a situation like this.
238
00:09:58,890 --> 00:10:02,480
Did you also know
that scorpions can be calmed down
239
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,480
by eating a Reuben sandwich?
240
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:07,944
Dad, I'm never going to need
to use that information, ever.
241
00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:12,150
Aha!
Milo, hand me a Reuben sandwich!
242
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:15,657
You got it.
One Reuben sandwich, pretty please.
243
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,781
Reuben on a rail.
244
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:19,535
Reuben up!
245
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,829
-Reuben.
-Thanks.
246
00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:23,615
One Reuben sandwich to go!
247
00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:28,710
(BURPS)
248
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,299
(SNORES)
249
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:34,091
(CHEERING)
250
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:38,595
Hey, punk, I am furious!
251
00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:43,307
Because you never told me
you could tame a wild scorpion.
252
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:45,693
This will make for
an even better commercial.
253
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:48,524
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Well, that's a relief.
254
00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:50,441
Good work, punk. (CHUCKLES)
255
00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:53,567
Oh, Bea, thank goodness you're okay!
256
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:55,818
I knew you could do it, kiddo.
257
00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:58,115
Remember, whatever you want to do in life,
258
00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:00,543
you know you always have our support.
259
00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:02,749
And that's not trivial!
260
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,542
(ALL LAUGH)
261
00:11:04,622 --> 00:11:05,622
(WESTERN MUSIC PLAYING)
262
00:11:05,707 --> 00:11:07,327
MALE VOICE: Is your hunger...
263
00:11:07,458 --> 00:11:09,248
out of control?
264
00:11:09,419 --> 00:11:11,209
Whoa! Whoa!
265
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:12,259
Whoa!
266
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:13,380
MALE VOICE: Tame it!
267
00:11:13,882 --> 00:11:15,802
With Hokey Poke Diner food.
268
00:11:16,467 --> 00:11:20,807
Hokey Poke Diner food is delicious!
269
00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:22,387
Eat my food!
270
00:11:22,473 --> 00:11:23,683
MALE VOICE: The Hokey Poke.
271
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,690
It's as easy as riding a scorpion.
272
00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:29,732
-Good job, honey.
-That's my Bea!
273
00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:31,108
Thanks, guys.
274
00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:33,234
Now, can anybody tell me
275
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:34,944
when does this glue wear off?
276
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,446
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
277
00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:49,921
(GRUNTS)
278
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:54,670
(ANGELIC MUSIC PLAYING)
279
00:11:56,507 --> 00:11:59,047
(SIGHS)
I can stand here all day
280
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:01,635
watching Steve Jackson pack that book bag.
281
00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:06,104
Girl, he is like a beautiful man painting.
282
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:09,437
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
283
00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,310
I wish I was one of those books.
284
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:13,480
(SNORTS)
285
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,106
-(SIGHS)
-MILO: Bea!
286
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,740
I have an amazing story.
287
00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:20,318
So, I was walking down the street,
minding my business,
288
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:21,526
when I found a quarter.
289
00:12:21,616 --> 00:12:22,986
And I said, "Hot dog!"
290
00:12:23,117 --> 00:12:26,367
And then I found a piece of bubblegum,
but the gum didn't taste good,
291
00:12:26,454 --> 00:12:28,374
so I stuck it under Oscar's pillow.
292
00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:31,078
-And then I went to the bathroom and...
-(BOTH GRUNT)
293
00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:32,962
-Bea!
-No, bro.
294
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:35,627
Bea and the girls are over there
watching Steve Jackson.
295
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:37,877
They do this, like, every morning.
296
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:41,426
I know because I watch Bea...
every morning.
297
00:12:41,511 --> 00:12:43,431
Oh, they just like
looking at Steve Jackson
298
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:45,603
'cause they think he's all perfect.
299
00:12:46,307 --> 00:12:47,347
They wrong.
300
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,018
Okay, today's lesson is easy.
301
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,729
Who knows how to say "hello" in French?
302
00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:55,775
Hola, mi amigos!
303
00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:59,318
No, doofus. It's bo... bo...
bo... bo... bo...
304
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:03,494
...bo... bo... bojour... bonjou...
bojour... bojou...
305
00:13:03,574 --> 00:13:06,704
What?
Can anyone help Oscar with his French?
306
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,826
I think what Oscar's trying to say is...
307
00:13:08,913 --> 00:13:10,963
-(BIRDS TWITTERING)
-Bonjour.
308
00:13:11,749 --> 00:13:13,669
-(ALL SIGH)
-Hot.
309
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:15,962
I think I just died.
310
00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:22,642
A+ for Steve Jackson. Yay!
311
00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:24,349
(CHEERING)
312
00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:26,429
(WHIMPERS)
313
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:27,723
(BLOWS WHISTLE)
314
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,227
(LAUGHS) Yah!
315
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:32,401
(ALL GASP)
316
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:36,023
-(OSCAR WHIMPERING)
-(GLASS SHATTERING)
317
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:37,147
(SCREAMS)
318
00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:44,945
Huh?
319
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:48,873
(GROANS)
320
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:51,872
(CHEERING)
321
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,166
BEA: I love you, Steve!
322
00:13:55,626 --> 00:13:57,126
I don't get it, Milo.
323
00:13:57,211 --> 00:14:00,551
Why does Steve Jackson get to be
the guy who's amazing at everything?
324
00:14:00,715 --> 00:14:02,925
How do ordinary guys like us
even stand a chance?
325
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:06,887
That is the question that all guys
are left pondering, Oscar...
326
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:09,596
What makes Steve Jackson
so perfect?
327
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,099
And how can we be more like him?
328
00:14:12,226 --> 00:14:14,896
(LAUGHS) We've done research.
329
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:20,111
After months of gathering data,
330
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,653
we believe the key to Steve's perfection
331
00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:24,530
lies within his hair.
332
00:14:24,614 --> 00:14:26,744
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
333
00:14:26,908 --> 00:14:29,368
JUMBO: Steve Jackson's golden locks
shine bright
334
00:14:29,452 --> 00:14:32,712
and move as though constantly caressed
by a gentle breeze.
335
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:35,081
(LAUGHS) That's me!
336
00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,416
Interesting.
337
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:38,212
But hair itself isn't perfect.
338
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,301
Steve Jackson must be applying
339
00:14:40,380 --> 00:14:42,670
some type of substance
to make this happen.
340
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,930
Like baloney.
341
00:14:46,177 --> 00:14:49,467
So what does a cool dude
put in his hair to make him perfect?
342
00:14:49,847 --> 00:14:51,017
Hey, guys.
343
00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:58,359
ALL: (GASP)
Steve's secret-recipe hair gel!
344
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:01,605
(LAUGHING)
345
00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:07,911
ANGELIC CHORUS: (SINGING)
Steve Jackson
346
00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:11,790
I guess we just apply some to our heads.
347
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:14,540
-Who wants to go first?
-Me!
348
00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:17,132
(LAUGHING)
349
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:18,708
-(ALL GASP)
-(ALBERT LAUGHS)
350
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,253
Wowie zowie!
351
00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:25,428
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
352
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:27,298
Milo, how do you feel?
353
00:15:27,385 --> 00:15:32,055
I feel... I feel kind of perfect.
354
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:33,983
We should put it to the test.
355
00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:37,807
FEMALE VOICE: (THROUGH HEADPHONES)
Bonjour. Souhaitez-vous un petit déjeuner?
356
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:38,979
Bonjour.
357
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:41,728
And then... a bunch of other words.
(SINGSONGS) Got it!
358
00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:44,567
(SCREECHES TO A HALT)
359
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:47,159
-Milo?
-Oh, what's up, Bea?
360
00:15:47,572 --> 00:15:49,782
Yeah, you know, I got
an amazing story to tell you.
361
00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:52,947
Ha. Yeah, some robots tried
to steal my lunch today,
362
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:54,745
so I had to fight them off.
363
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,621
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
364
00:15:56,706 --> 00:16:00,666
Wow, Milo, your stories
are so interesting!
365
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:03,798
It's like I could listen
to you talk all day.
366
00:16:04,046 --> 00:16:06,376
-Yeah, but I'm done now.
-Okay. See you later.
367
00:16:07,133 --> 00:16:08,183
Hot dawg!
368
00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:11,255
FEMALE VOICE:
Souhaitez-vous un petit déjeuner?
369
00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,719
It worked! It actually worked!
370
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:16,926
-(JUMBO LAUGHING)
-She liked the hair! (GIGGLES)
371
00:16:17,018 --> 00:16:19,188
-Guys!
-I can't believe it!
372
00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:21,693
-Bea liked my story!
-We heard!
373
00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:23,398
All right, let's gel up!
374
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:26,193
(ALL GIGGLING)
375
00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:30,067
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
376
00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:33,658
Fellas, it's time to be perfect.
377
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:36,580
Did you get extra credit for that?
'Cause I was really...
378
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:37,912
(ALL GASP)
379
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,287
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
380
00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,964
-Wow.
-(FINBERLEY GASPS)
381
00:16:49,592 --> 00:16:50,592
(CLATTERING)
382
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,969
Yeah, so, you know, like,
that's when the aliens
383
00:16:56,057 --> 00:16:57,387
jumped down out of the clouds...
384
00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:04,105
(LAUGHTER)
385
00:17:04,190 --> 00:17:05,480
...and then they grabbed me,
386
00:17:05,566 --> 00:17:08,396
and then magically a jet pack appeared
and I just flew away.
387
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:18,254
(LAUGHTER)
388
00:17:18,746 --> 00:17:22,666
I always wondered what being perfect
would feel like, and now I know!
389
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:23,957
It's awesome!
390
00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:26,956
It's like having seven birthdays in a row.
391
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:30,259
Uh, guys, I don't mean
to sound like a wet noodle,
392
00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:32,426
but at the rate we're using
Steve's hair gel,
393
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:34,598
we're gonna run out by tomorrow morning.
394
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,310
What? (GASPS)
395
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:37,719
Hair jelly!
396
00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:40,767
(SOBS) I can't go back to my old life.
397
00:17:40,851 --> 00:17:42,521
Okay, okay. Okay, listen.
398
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:45,935
We can make it last
if we begin to ration it.
399
00:17:47,650 --> 00:17:51,570
-Great idea, Oscar.
-Yes, sharing is important.
400
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:55,777
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)
401
00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:06,957
(MUSIC CRESCENDOS)
402
00:18:07,837 --> 00:18:09,587
Why are we all looking at each other?
403
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:13,589
-Yay, Oscar!
-All right, Oscar!
404
00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:14,796
Très bien, Oscar.
405
00:18:14,885 --> 00:18:17,005
Wow, Oscar, you're really
acing French lately.
406
00:18:17,179 --> 00:18:21,929
Oh, uh... Merci beaucoup, Bea. (LAUGHS)
407
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:24,979
Yeah. So, do you wanna get together
and study for the big test tomorrow?
408
00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:26,062
Oui!
409
00:18:26,147 --> 00:18:28,897
Uh, I mean, yeah, sure.
410
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:30,743
Sounds cool.
411
00:18:30,901 --> 00:18:33,451
Great. Bonjour, Oscar.
412
00:18:34,447 --> 00:18:38,117
Wow! First perfect grades,
and now a study date with Bea!
413
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:41,661
Oh, magical hair gel,
is there anything you can't do?
414
00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:46,916
(SCREAMS)
415
00:18:48,210 --> 00:18:49,460
The gel's losing its hold.
416
00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:51,594
But... but... but I've got
a study date tonight!
417
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,882
I... I guess I could use
a little more gel.
418
00:18:54,050 --> 00:18:55,340
The other guys'll never know.
419
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,510
Plus, this is an emergency.
420
00:18:57,970 --> 00:19:00,560
Plus... who am I even talking to?
421
00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,942
I thought you were talking to me.
422
00:19:06,896 --> 00:19:08,476
(GASPING)
423
00:19:10,024 --> 00:19:11,034
Huh?
424
00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:13,858
-Hurry up and open it!
-Thunder punch!
425
00:19:14,028 --> 00:19:15,358
(GRUNTS)
Ow.
426
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:17,486
(GASPS)
Jumbo Shrimp, Albert,
427
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:20,033
you guys are trying to break
into my locker to take the gel.
428
00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,241
I'm sorry, Oscar, but I have to.
429
00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:25,501
I have a pudding date
with the Freshwater cheer squad.
430
00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:28,325
That requires a substantial
amount of perfection,
431
00:19:28,501 --> 00:19:30,421
and I am less than perfect.
432
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:33,300
Coach Salmons offered me
a dodgeball scholarship,
433
00:19:33,464 --> 00:19:35,764
so I have to be perfect all season.
434
00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:38,045
Yeah well, I need it way more
than you guys do.
435
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:41,219
-(SCREAMS, GRUNTS)
-M... Milo?
436
00:19:41,472 --> 00:19:44,892
I need everyone
to keep listening to my stories!
437
00:19:45,101 --> 00:19:47,941
-I have to be perfect tonight!
-Well, I need it more.
438
00:19:48,104 --> 00:19:49,654
I need it more than more.
439
00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:51,730
Plus, I have more hair than you guys do.
440
00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:53,896
Oh yeah? (GRUNTS)
Now you don't.
441
00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:56,200
(GASPS) Not precious Righty!
442
00:19:57,488 --> 00:19:58,738
(ROARS)
443
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,202
-Hey!
-(GRUNTS)
444
00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:02,794
Ouch!
445
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,948
Perfect hair!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
446
00:20:05,037 --> 00:20:06,247
OSCAR: My gel!
447
00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,500
-(JUMBO LAUGHING)
-(MILO SCREAMING)
448
00:20:08,624 --> 00:20:10,334
Give us back our hair, Jumbo!
449
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:12,379
Hmm. Wish I would have thought of that.
450
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:13,881
(LAUGHS)
451
00:20:13,963 --> 00:20:16,223
-(GRUNTS)
-(OSCAR PANTING)
452
00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:17,718
-(LAUGHS)
-(MILO SCREECHES)
453
00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:22,851
Wow!
454
00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:24,723
Milo, stop!
455
00:20:26,183 --> 00:20:27,183
(ALL GASP)
456
00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:28,768
Great, I look like a boy.
457
00:20:31,522 --> 00:20:32,902
(GRUNTING AND ARGUING)
458
00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:34,782
OSCAR: It's mine. It's mine, Milo!
459
00:20:36,819 --> 00:20:38,279
Milo, Oscar!
460
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:39,609
Give it to me!
461
00:20:39,697 --> 00:20:41,657
Give me my locks, Jumbo!
462
00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:46,044
(LAUGHS)
463
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:49,290
What? It's... it's empty.
464
00:20:49,749 --> 00:20:51,959
-STEVE: Uh, guys?
-(ALL GASP)
465
00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:54,092
ALL: Steve Jackson!
466
00:20:54,295 --> 00:20:55,625
Is that my hair gel?
467
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:57,045
Uh... Um...
468
00:20:57,173 --> 00:20:59,133
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
469
00:20:59,216 --> 00:21:00,126
(NERVOUS LAUGH)
470
00:21:00,301 --> 00:21:02,091
-(CROWD CHEERING)
-(CAMERAS SNAPPING)
471
00:21:04,472 --> 00:21:05,812
Uh...
472
00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:07,483
All right, Steve!
473
00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:10,481
We just wanted to be perfect like you.
474
00:21:10,728 --> 00:21:12,648
So we took your hair gel.
475
00:21:12,772 --> 00:21:14,322
Then we used it all up.
476
00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:15,778
(WAILS)
477
00:21:15,858 --> 00:21:19,648
And now... we're sorry!
478
00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:22,322
Guys, hair product
doesn't make a guy perfect.
479
00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:24,155
Nobody's perfect.
480
00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:28,156
The important thing is that you believe
in yourself and try your best.
481
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,711
Whether it's doing your best in school...
482
00:21:31,582 --> 00:21:32,882
or at a sport...
483
00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:36,047
or... various other things,
484
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:39,259
Just work hard,
and good things will happen.
485
00:21:39,632 --> 00:21:41,382
Guys, Steve's right.
486
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:44,261
It wasn't awesome hair
making us do all that cool stuff.
487
00:21:44,595 --> 00:21:48,595
-It was us.
-Fellows, I'm ashamed of how I acted.
488
00:21:48,808 --> 00:21:50,678
-Me too!
-I'm sorry.
489
00:21:50,768 --> 00:21:53,938
-All is forgiven.
-Ah, I love you guys!
490
00:21:54,313 --> 00:21:56,443
All right, show's over, folks.
491
00:21:56,607 --> 00:21:58,647
-Move it along.
-Cool.
492
00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:01,028
Now who's up for a shake
at the Hokey Poke?
493
00:22:01,111 --> 00:22:02,821
-Whoo! (LAUGHS)
-I'm having chocolate!
494
00:22:02,947 --> 00:22:04,277
(JUMBO LAUGHS) Milk.
495
00:22:04,365 --> 00:22:07,025
Dudes, what's up?
496
00:22:07,618 --> 00:22:11,578
-(FLIES BUZZING)
-(BABY CRYING)
497
00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:13,544
-Whoa.
-Not working.
498
00:22:13,624 --> 00:22:15,134
Make it stop!
499
00:22:15,209 --> 00:22:17,249
-(ALBERT SCREAMS)
-My eyes!
500
00:22:18,212 --> 00:22:20,262
(SNAKE GASPS)
I wanna play a game, Mouse.
501
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,219
That's funny. I don't.
502
00:22:22,299 --> 00:22:24,929
Come on! Guess what I'm thinking.
503
00:22:25,219 --> 00:22:27,219
(GROANS) Fine!
504
00:22:27,471 --> 00:22:29,431
Let's see, what do we got here?
505
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:32,889
-(CLOCK TICKING)
-(MUSIC PLAYING)
506
00:22:43,070 --> 00:22:44,070
Cheese!
507
00:22:44,154 --> 00:22:45,874
(GASPS)
You're like a psychic!
35602
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