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By some effing miracle, we are
in this wildcard match, and if we win this wildcard match,
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then we go to the playoffs, and
normally I don't really care about winning,
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but today, I have not one, but
two exes out on that field, so, I came to
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["Play the Field" by Partner]
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The sayings are true, no wife,
all the strife.
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You know today is my last game
with the Brovaries, because tomorrow,
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-F.I.R.
-E agent Beck is deporting me back to Dinkelsbuhl.
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That's not how the system works,
but I'm glad she understands there are repercussions in the
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Yeah, the Toronto Blue Gays did
not play their absolute sharpest this season,
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but that is due to a generous
helping of having our heads not in the game, but in the laps of
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I'm a generous lover. Ann used
to call me lapdog daddy.
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Okay team listen up, listen up
here,
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we got one chance, to make
Joanne's dream come true.
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I mean Sasha is probably gonna
leave her.
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So I'd like us all to work
together on this one.
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I made a victory playlist in
anticipation.
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Yeah, I'm only going to have
five pre-game beer, so that I can really focus on the sport.
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[Ann] Okay, gimme a Brovaries on
three!
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Here we go. One, two, three,
[Everyone] Brovaries!
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- [Ann] Hey,
- Sup dog?
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That's so nice.
Cut up some orange slices team.
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Let's kill those Blue Gays!
[Team cheers]
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Yeah let's win this game, so I
can get back to being a better wife to be.
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Let's go!
[team chants] Brovaries, Brovaries, Brovaries!
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[Ann] Run, run, yes!
[team cheers]
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- Yes! You are out Beck! You are
out, out, out! - [Ann] Nice one Zari!
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[team cheers]
[Boris] That's a baby!
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[team cheers]
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[Parker] Okay look alive Blue
Gays, we've got one more out and we are going to the playoffs!
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[Sound of ball hitting Ann's
face]
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[Ann] Ow, fuck!
Oh my god I'm bleeding.
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[Boris] Ann are you alright?
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Are you okay? Can we get some
help over here?
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- Fuck me.
- Just hold it back, okay-
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- Holy fuck.
- [Eva] Maybe some ice?
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Blood rule.
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A player who is bleeding or has
blood on the uniform shall be considered an injured player.
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Such players may not return to
the game until the bleeding has stopped,
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and the soiled cloth has been
treated with a bleach disinfectant.
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Okay, it's gonna stop, just,
just give her a second!
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[Beck] Tick tock pubic ass, it's
been five minutes.
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It's only dribbling!
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Yeah but none of that matters if
we can't treat the soiled cloth with a bleach disinfectant.
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Zari!
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It'll stop.
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[together] It won't stop.
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- That girl's a bleeder.
- I still used to go down on her quite a bit.
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Like a lot.
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No it's fine. Take that.
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Oh god. Oh...
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Short hand rule: If a player
must leave the game and there is no substitute available,
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when it's that player's turn to
bat, an out is declared.
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As presiding league assistant-
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- Oh boy.
- I've determined that a ten minute nosebleed
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is dangerous, and Ann, I'm gonna
have to ask you to leave the field.
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Suck it Brovaries.
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Are you fucking kidding me?
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No way, I can bat and bleed!
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This is bullshit.
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Rules is rules pubes.
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And seeing as you have no one
else to bat for her, looks like you bushfarts have lost.
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Again.
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Not on my watch ya bully.
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["Play the Field" by Partner]
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00:04:09,481 --> 00:04:14,031
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