All language subtitles for The.Real.Housewives.Of.Beverly.Hills.S05E23.WEBRip.x264-ION10

[upbeat music]

(Andy voiceover)
Tonight, Housewives secrets
revealed.

I have a sex book.

- Sex tips?
- Just the tip.

[laughs]

- Did you do Playboy?
- Oh, Playboy.

Have you done Playboy?

Did you have breakfast
this morning?

[both shouting]

It's priced at 11 million,
950,000.

[laughing]

Wow, you look great.

[both humming]

This is freaking hard.

Acting is one of the easiest
jobs on the planet.

You're gonna make us all
a lot of money.

- Sháá. Oh.
- Whoo.

[laughter]

(Andy voiceover)
Plus, the Lisa Rinna/Kim
confrontation

you heard about but never saw.

Be very careful

or I'm going to fááá you up.

Somebody's gonna hold you
accountable, sooner or later,

Kim Richards.

I promise you.

[upbeat music]

Throw me to the wolves, and I
shall return leading the pack.

Character isn't what you have,
it's who you are.

You've heard a lot about me,
but it's only true

when it comes from my lips.

I'm not a bitch,
but I've played one on TV.

I've been rich,
and I've been famous,

but happiness beats them both.

I'd rather spend my life
kicking ass than kissing it.

Planes and yachts are nice,
but my happiness starts at home.

[hip hop music]

♪♪ ♪♪

Christie from Playa Vista,
California said,

"Have any of the other ladies
read Lisa Rinna's sex book,

The Big, Fun, Sexy Sex Book?"
You have a sex book?

- Big, Fun, Sexy Sexy Book?
- I have a sex book.

- What is... is it sex tips?
- It is, I...

- Just the tip.
- Just the tip.

I wrote it with a sex expert
who would come to the house

and teach us how to give
really good blowjobs.

- Oh, come on.
- You know Lou.

- No, I don't know Lou.
- It's true.

- That's where you met Lisa.
[laughter]

Listen, I don't need a lesson
in that, thank you very much.

I've got that covered.
How do you think

I got this jewelry? Thank you.

(Andy voiceover)
Lisa Rinna's sexy resume
doesn't only include

her femme fatale roles
in a sex book.

As the ladies learned,
after the Burbank Film Festival,

she shared even more of herself.

They're not aiming
their cameras at us.

Over here.

(photographer)
Is everyone together
right here ready?

[speaking French]

- Cheers. Thanks for coming.
- Cheers.

- You guys are the best.
- Happy to be here.

(Lisa V)
And I like an evening of calm,
and just laughter.

- Thank you very much for that.
- Thank you.

(Lisa R)
I'm happy about that actually.

Because I was almost thinking,
you know, I'm not sure

I want to take any heavy drama
tonight.

I swear to God,
I'll knock her teeth out.

(Kyle)
Get the fááá out of my face.

- No. Back up.
- You are disgusting.

This is not okay with me.

But I want to know, like,

I can't figure out
what could come at me.

You know all those shady things
you've done in your past.

- I do.
- They're all coming

- to the surface.
- They're coming.

I've no sex tape.

I have no nude pictures
on my telephone.

And I have no porn.

You know what?
You can open a magazine

and see my legs spread,
if you'd like.

- What?
- Showing the whole shebang?

The whole shebang.

I posed nude for Playboy.

And then, there's no need
to have any naked pictures

of yourself because
I got it out of my system.

Did you have your legs
open on the same page?

- Or was one...
- Like page 88 and 89.

One leg on this side
and one leg...

Did you do Playboy?

No, I didn't.
But I knew you did.

I like how she asked
like it's a normal thing.

"Have you been to Hawaii?
Have you done Playboy?"

Did you have breakfast
this morning?

You did Playboy
when you were pregnant.

- I did.
- No.

- It was a pregnant layout.
- I swear to God.

- Did you look pregnant?
- I was seven months pregnant.

Could they actually
see the baby?

No, they...

I do keep it classy...

even in my smut.

- You never did it not pregnant?
- I did it both.

I don't think there's any
magazine that would've paid

to see me naked,
seven months pregnant.

I was as wide as I was tall.

Like Humpty Dumpty
with a maternity dress.

How was Harry with all this?
He was okay?

Well, it's really interesting
because, you know,

Harry goes,
I know she's gonna do it

- no matter what...
- So I might as well

- just support her.
- I either have to support her

or get on board.

I did see Lisa's pictorial
when she was pregnant.

And I was at a train station,
and I saw the magazine,

and I went, "Oh, there's Lisa."

And then I went,
"Oh, there's Lisa!"

- Forget it.
- That's also the way,

if you guys look at it,
how your kids perceive it, too.

We had a really hilarious moment
the other day,

where Amelia comes in,
and she goes,

"Mom, my friends
have your Playboy."

- No!
- "And they think

- you're a MILF."
- Oh, my...

- That's weird.
- And she just went...

She walked out.

If they want to see it,
they're gonna just go see it.

But I think for me to go,
hey let's take a peek.

(Eileen)
I love you all,
but I have to go mingle.

- Okay - Bye.

Great job. I'm so proud of you.

Let's just take a little
journey down memory lane.

It's not gonna... it's not gonna
go over really well

with anybody.

- I'll speak to you tomorrow.
- Okay, bye, girls.

Try and behave yourself.
Just a little bit.

- I don't think so.
- Okay. Good.

I'm not going to.

[laughter]

(Kyle)
Oh, my gosh,
that's hilarious.

My, God.

- What a nutter. I love her.
- That was hilarious.

Okay, I'm gonna Google
Lisa Rinna.

Pregnant.

Lisa Rinna. Naked. Pregnant.

(Lisa V)
Let's see what comes up.

- [laughing]
- Oh, my God!

Well, there's definitely a bush.

So Harry must be pleased.

Because we all know that Harry
loves a flipping bush.

There's smoke coming out
of my iPad.

[laughter]

Is your house for sale,
by the way?

Yes, it is.

Why are you selling the house?

Because, you know,
Gigi and Bella are gone.

It's just David, Anwar, and I.

And it's this big,
huge responsibility,

this ship,
that I just don't have

the energy running anymore,
you know?

(Andy voiceover)
With her plans to downsize,
Yolanda knew just who to call.

It's Mauricio to the rescue,

helping to find her
next dream home.

- Hi, Yolanda.
- Mauricio.

- This is amazing.
- Thank you.

Mauricio and I had a connection
from the first time we met.

And, obviously,
there's thousands

of real estate brokers in L.A.

But why would I go to somebody
I don't know?

I'd rather go with somebody
that I love and respect.

What I'm looking for
is something a lot smaller.

[upbeat music]

♪♪ ♪♪

It doesn't even need
to be an acre.

- Like, no land.
- Right.

- Like, no gardeners...
- Right.

No blowers, no... you know.

Instead of 50 lemon trees,
I'm gonna want one lemon tree.

Right. Right.

The first house I'm gonna show
you is in Holmby Hills.

- On Monovale.
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.

It's actually right next door
to the house you built,

you know, on Carolwood.

The one that Michael Jackson
died in?

- Yes.
- Oh, my gosh.

- Yes.
- Well, I'm excited to go out

and check it out.

I haven't looked for a house in,
you know, ten years.

So I don't really know
what's on the market.

I really want to educate myself

and learn what is realistically
out there.

And not my crazy imagination
of what I think I want.

This is a beautiful
neighborhood.

Yeah. This street is beautiful.

I love it here.

(Yolanda)
Well, this is the perfect-sized
driveway.

- It's perfect, right?
- I love that.

Yeah. It's priced
at 11 million, 950,000.

[laughing]

I'm not 100% sure
if Yolanda has a budget in mind.

But today,
we're gonna look at some homes

that are ranged
from $12 to $15 million,

and hopefully one of them
fits her budget.

It's approximately
8,000 square feet.

- This the dining room?
- Dining room here.

These are all
your refrigeration systems.

(Yolanda) Yeah.

Certainly not your refrigerator.

- But...
- Yeah.

Oh, my God,
I'll stay beautiful forever.

Oh, my God, this is
the perfect-sized backyard.

This is the size
you're looking for.

- This is the size. Yeah.
- With a view.

- You need a view.
- Yeah. This is beautiful.

- It's stunning.
- It's stunning.

So this could be a nice
guest room for somebody.

This could be
a great teenage room.

- No. It's a great house.
- A great guest room.

Today is the first day
on the market.

I bet you you'll sell it
this week.

Oh, it'll sell this week,
probably.

You know, not to me,
but you'll sell it.

[symphonic music]

♪♪ ♪♪

- You ready?
- Cute. Yeah.

Well, the house was originally
built in 1936.

So it's got some history
and some panache to it.

And how many square feet is it?

About 4,800.

And how much are they asking?

$14.9 million.

- Wow.
- You want to see it?

- Yeah.
- Let's check it out.

So then, you know,
you go into the dining room.

- I like the size of this.
- Right.

- I mean, I like this size.
- Like, you're ready

- to live in a house this size.
- Yeah.

This is what you're looking for.

- Yeah.
- I think it's fun

taking Yolanda out
to go look at property

because she's creative.

So the house doesn't actually
have to be perfect.

She can actually change a home
and make it perfect for her,

which is probably what we'll
ultimately find for her.

Kitchen's a little bit small.

Kitchen is small
and it's not open.

So, ideally, you'd like it open
to the family room.

Something... yeah, just...

I always liked the one where
you're cooking

- and the kids sit around, and...
- Yeah.

But then, again,
two of the three kids are gone.

- So I got to get out...
- Right. So you knows, right?

I got to get that out
of my head.

Yeah, so you don't
really need that, right?

I'll be cooking for myself
and my husband soon.

Exactly.

(Yolanda)
All right. Most important
part of the house.

- The master.
- Master bedroom.

Let's check it out.

Wow. It's cute.

It's small, but I wanted to
show you something small

to see if it was something
that you were comfortable with.

And seems like you are, right?

Yeah, I mean,
I definitely don't mind

- the... I like feeling.
- The coziness.

(Yolanda)
I grew up in
300 square feet, so...

Right. Right. In a room.

You know what I mean?

With a whole family, so...

- Of course.
- Yes.

So check out the outdoors.

It's kind of cool.

You've got great land here.

I'd like to build a Jacuzzi
into the pool.

It's really cute,
but I... it's not for me.

- Right, I get that.
- You know?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

I just want a tiny little
sanctuary in the city.

Is it that difficult?

I mean, I hope not.

All right, well,
let's call it a day,

and we'll go see some more
houses next time.

Yeah.

(Andy voiceover) Coming up...

Be very careful,

or I'm going to fááá you up.

Are you ladies ready
to be grandparents?

- I am.
- I am.

- I can't wait!
- We talked about this.

I can't wait.
- I would like that.

(Kim)
I told Brooke,
if she doesn't hurry up,

I don't know what I'm gonna do.

She's like, "Mom,
we're not ready yet."

I said, "No, Brooke.
No, please."

- Make it happen.
- And then, my girlfriend said,

like, "Well, what do you want
to be called?

Like, you know,
she's naming all these..."

And I said, "I want to be called
Grandma."

(Andy voiceover)
Kim isn't the only Housewife
eager to add to her family.

Lisa wants
another mouth to feed also.

Okay, perfect.
Can you open that for me?

Yeah, put that there.

And then, this, we'll use
for the sangria.

- Okay.
- And then, um...

So Pan and Jason are just coming
over for, like a little snack.

- Mm-hmm.
- You haven't seen them

- for ages, have you?
- No.

I have to force them
to spend time with me now.

- I know.
- I swear, last time I was here,

one tried to attack me.

- Yeah. Look at these guys.
- It was that one, I know.

Pandora and Jason have been
incredibly busy

with their sangria business.

It was my recipe, my design,
my creation,

and it's been an enormous
amount of work.

Come on and let's, uh...

- Mum is outside.
- Where is she?

She's just having a snack.

- A bit windy tonight.
- How cute.

- I love you, but you're late.
- Come on, little pup.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'm sorry.
Came straight from a meeting.

- You did?
- How are you?

- Yeah.
- You're always coming

- from a meeting. Sit.
- Story of my life.

Thank goodness they're rooted
here in Los Angeles.

But they do have to travel
a lot.

So when I get them back here,
I want to spend time with them.

They probably would rather
be with their friends

if the truth be known,
but I'm not having it.

- You're always away.
- I live on a plane.

I know, and I wanted to talk
to you about that as well.

- Thanks. Oh, great.
- Go on, help yourself.

(Lisa)
What do you mean,
"oh, great"?

- What?
- Nothing good starts

with I wanted to talk to you
about that.

(Ken)
She's got a bone
to pick with you.

No. It's not a bone
to pick with you.

Well, let's cheers first.
Come on.

- No, no. It's nothing serious.
- Cheers.

We'll have a sip of sangria
before we get to that.

- Cheers. What's going on?
- No.

I was just saying to Daddy

that everything you're doing
is great.

- And I support it.
- That's great. Yeah.

But you're not here.

- And so what about...
- You might as well have gone

- to New York.
- Trust me,

living out of a suitcase
is no fun.

But it's necessary.

It's definitely wearing,
but we didn't...

None of us expected it
to take off like this, so...

(Lisa)
I know, but you're gone
from Villa Blanca.

You're gone from Pump.

I always hope that Pandora
and Jason

would take over a couple
of the restaurants.

But I don't think
that's the plan.

I think now they've got
their own thing going.

(Jason)
What would make you happy?

- Anyway, come on.
- We want you to be successful.

- But we also...
- Shall I tell you

- what would make me happy?
- Please, yeah.

(Ken) No, no, no. Don't.

[Jason laughs]
- Let me just say, I'm...

I'll tell what...
Okay, I'll tell you

what would make me happy.

Where's she going?

- She's gonna get you a puppy.
- Generally,

when she gets that excited,
it's about a puppy.

So this is what would
make me happy.

If you're asking.

I've had this
for about five years now.

- Right?
- A hat?

How's a hat gonna make
you happy?

That's got nothing
to do with it.

Uh-oh.

I've had this
for about five years now,

and I need you to fill it.

[laughter]

The kind of grandmother I'll be,

that child could do nothing
wrong at all.

I would ruin it.
Whatever she said,

I'd say the complete opposite.

I would just absolutely spoil
that little munchkin to death

and make no apologies for it.

Go on then. Why don't you
have it and give it to us?

- Because that sounds terrible.
- Yeah, we would never do that.

No, but just have it.

Don't give it to us,
but just leave it here.

- You see what he's like...
- Are you kidding?

When he gets his hand
on one of those puppies.

What would he be like
with a child?

I mean, I'm fine
if don't have a grandbaby soon.

Right, Giggy?

Trust me, he's ready.

He wants them.

- Do you?
- Oh, if we have a baby,

it's coming
to the meetings with us.

[dog barks]
- Oh, look, he's jealous.

(Jason) He's jealous.

(Lisa)
Somebody would be jealous,
actually.

(Andy voiceover)
At the reunion,
Kim revealed

that Lisa Rinna
sent her threatening texts

after Adrienne's party.

"Be very careful,
or I will fááá you up."

(Andy voiceover)
Here's the meeting
you didn't see.

Hi.

This is not good.

Before you say anything,
I just want to let you know

that I am here only
to discuss the texts.

These texts completely
concern me, Lisa.

"Be very careful
or I am going to fááá you up."

First of all,
what really frightens me

is that it didn't come,
like, in a heated moment.

Like, here's just somebody
sitting around

thinking, I'm angry,
and I'm gonna fááá you up.

That's scary to me.

The next morning, at 9:00,
you send me another one.

"You need to be stopped now."

And I'm here today
because I want to know

if, you know,
God forbid there's something

in some sort of situation,
that you're not

going to hurt me.

Well, you have to understand
what triggered me

and the injustice that I felt

when you went after my husband.

You just don't go threatening
people's lives, Lisa.

Well, I was fáááing
pissed off, man.

When I talked to you, she said,

"Yolanda, I've lost two
brother-in-laws.

My husband has only been sober
for three years."

Let's talk about the husband.

Excuse me, did you just say,

"let's talk about the husband"?

Let's not talk about
what you don't want out.

- Don't touch my husband, ever.
- Just saying. Just saying.

- Don't you fáááing ever touch...
- What you don't want out

for everybody to know.

I think any other girl
at that table,

if you had said the things that
you said about their husbands,

everyone would have been
across this table like that.

I said let's talk about them.

- Oh, you assumed...
- Let's talk.

- You said much more than that.
- I didn't say anything

other than let's talk.

You said much more than that.
You did.

- This is not about that.
- Yeah, it is.

No, it isn't.
Actually, you're going

way back and making...

- Kim, but it's where it starts.
- No.

- Yeah.
- This is dumb.

I'm not taking this
back to that, Lisa.

This is about threats.

- This is about...
- Okay. I already owned up

to that, and we're done.

- No.
- I owned up to it.

We're not done.
You just don't make threats

and come physically at somebody,
and say we're done.

Well, and you don't accuse
somebody's husband

of some horrible thing...

I didn't accuse him of anything.

- Yeah. Yes you did.
- Oh, I didn't.

I didn't say anything.

Why don't you just be honest?

Why don't you just be
straight up?

This is not... I'm not going...

This is exactly...
I'm not discussing this.

- Be straight up honest.
- Oh, honey.

This is not why I came here.

- Just own it.
- That's the truth.

I've already owned it.

I told you on the phone,
I own it.

But why are you trying to turn
this around on me?

'Cause, Kim, if it weren't
for what you said...

You're going backwards
when I only came, really,

- to find out if I'm safe.

- I get that.
- So I think we're good.

So I'm safe in an environment
with you?

You are safe in an environment
with me.

You're gonna keep your hands
to yourself

and not send me
threatening messages?

No, I won't.

But I was really pissed off...

- Okay, then we're good.
- And you need to know that.

[intense music]

♪♪ ♪♪

Being pissed off doesn't give
you the right

to hurt people, Lisa,
or threaten them.

Well, attacking
somebody's family

doesn't give you the right to be
not held accountable.

Somebody's gonna hold you
accountable

sooner or later, Kim Richards.

I promise you.

They will.

And I hope it's yourself.

I feel sorry for you.

(Andy voiceover) Coming up...

I want it to have
a Marilyn vibe,

but I don't want to look
like a Marilyn impersonator.

[laughter]

How have your fans,
from watching you on soaps,

reacted to seeing you here?

I've only seen really
positive things

- for the most part.
- Uh-huh.

I think they liked my work

and had a completely different
idea of who I am as a person.

And they've gotten to see,
you know,

kind of behind the screen.

(Andy voiceover)
In her career, Eileen has played
the bitch, the heroine,

and even a man.

On this day, she was crowned
soap opera royalty.

Are we doing, like,
a Marilyn eye?

Maybe a smoky eye, but, um,
with a real pale lip.

(George)
So what parties
are you going to, Davidson?

Well, there's the one
right after.

The CBS is party
at the pool, right?

Mm-hmm.

And then Days has a party
at Boa.

I'd feel a lot better
if I had, like, a driver,

- and a car.
- So get Uber.

- Get Uber.
- I'm not gonna be sitting

in my gown, waiting for Uber.

What?

I was nominated for an Emmy
in 1998,

for Kristen Blake DiMera
on Days of Our Lives.

That was my first nomination.

And then I was nominated
in 200, for Ashley Abbott

on The Young and the Restless.

Obviously, I didn't win
those times.

And then, I was just nominated
again for Kristen DiMera

on Days of Our Lives.

He was all over me.

He was everywhere.

Obviously, being crazy pays off.

The character, I mean.

I want it to have
a Marilyn vibe,

but I don't want to look like

a Marilyn impersonator.

[laughter]

I've always said I'm actually
more like Kristen,

without all the craziness.

Ashley's a little bit more,
you know,

uptight.

- Whoo.
- [gasps]

- Oh, my God. I love it.
- Oh, my God.

It's perfect.

- It looks good, huh?
- Do you like it?

- I love it.
- Are you happy?

- Eileen.

- I love it.
- Well, let's take a selfie

- before you go.
- Okay.

There's obviously similarities
I have with both characters,

but I'm not as rich
as either one of them.

I just play really rich people
on TV.

[knock at door] - Yeah, babe.

- Oh. Wow.
- What do you think?

My hair's kind of funky now,
but what do you think?

You did it. You look amazing.

- You look handsome.
- Honey.

Come here, let me look
at your tie.

Wow. You look great.

How you feeling?

It's so much fun to be able
to play these kind of roles

because, you know,
it's like when you're a kid,

and you're pretending.
It's just like that.

Only, with, you know,
special effects,

and more money.

(Sharon Osbourne)
And the Emmy goes to...

Eileen Davidson.

A lot of times, I have to
just really pinch myself,

and go, I can't believe
I ended up having this career.

And I think I realize
in looking back

that I'm one of the lucky few.

I snagged it.

Whoo!

[upbeat music]

♪♪ ♪♪

(Andy voiceover)
Eileen may need to guard
that Emmy

because there's another actress
on the rise, right across town.

Excuse me.

Why are you eating that brownie
right now?

Portia, can you go get a plate?

[Portia laughs]

How am I gonna do this?

If only your dad could do
these things for me.

It would be really great.

Tell me if this is a good spot,
Portia.

- Like this?
- Mm-hmm.

Is that even?
How am I gonna know?

Mom, it's crooked.

You were supposed to put that
on a plate.

I couldn't find one.

Oh, Portia...

[hammer banging]

That's a little better.

Okay.

- Mom?
- What?

Is that coach, um...
[inaudible] coming?

Is what coming?

Is the acting coach coming?

Is that something you
really want to do?

And why is it you
want to do that?

Because it's fun.

How do you know it's fun
if you haven't done it?

- 'Cause, I don't know.
- It can be a lot of fun.

But it can also be a lot of work

and you can also
get your feelings hurt.

Portia has been pushing me about
acting for a long time now.

And I've been scared
and skeptical.

But if she really wants that,
then I should, you know,

at least support her.

Not necessarily encourage her,
but support her.

Let me ask you a question.

You know how when sometimes
people have said to you,

"Oh what's your name?"
And then you say,

you tell them,
"I don't want to say it."

Mm-hmm.

Why do you say that?

'Cause I don't know
how to pronounce my name.

You do know how to pronounce
your name.

No, I don't.

You just have a little accent.

Anytime your child feels bad
about something,

or feeling insecure,
you feel it too.

So I hate that for her.

I don't want her to ever feel
self-conscious.

People don't understand me.

- They do understand you, honey.
- No.

One time I was at a place
and you weren't there,

and was going to ask this girl

for a Band-Aid
'cause I was bleeding.

And, um, she wanted
to know my name,

but I was telling her
but she didn't get it right.

Well, let me hear.

No.

Well, I don't want you to be shy
saying your own name.

You have a beautiful name.
Portia.

- You know? Just say it.
- Can I have a nickname?

What do you want
your nickname to be?

Sarah.

Now say "Portia."

No, I'm bad at saying it.

Honey, now listen to me.

If you want to act...
Let me scoot you closer to me,

I don't want you falling back.

If you want to act,
you can't be shy.

You can't... when they say,
"Hi, what's your name?"

Because you go into a room...
I'm telling you,

it's not just fun
like you think it is.

You have to go into a room,
you introduce yourself,

and they say,
"What's your name?"

And then you say?

Sarah.

Kim started doing commercials
at six months old,

and I was like three years old.

So I have a very clear
perspective on this,

obviously, because this is
what I did growing up.

But I didn't have a normal
upbringing.

And I want my kids
to have a very normal life.

Do you want me
to take you to somebody

that will help you learn
how to say your Rs better?

No, I want to act.

Well, if you want to act,

and you don't want to say
certain words

because you can't say your Rs,
that's not gonna be very good.

No, I don't want to do it.

Are those real tears,
or acting tears?

Acting.

(Kyle) Oh, my Lord, help me.

(Andy voiceover)
Another Beverly Hills actress
nearby needs some help.

And this time, the daughter
is helping the mother.

(Lisa) Hey, Delilah Belle?

- Yeah?
- Will you come for a sec?

Yeah.
I found this on the counter.

Oh, it's my script I think.

- Oh, cool. Okay.
- What's your script for?

Well, I'm doing this movie.

I got this little movie
called Bound and Babysitting.

I'm playing a businesswoman,
like an entrepreneur,

that's a hot little firecracker.

Interesting.

I just booked this cute
little Hallmark movie

called Bound For Babysitting,

which I still don't quite know
why it's called that.

But that's a whole other story.

It's three days work.
It's like a small, little...

- Cute little role.
- Is this for the thing?

Yeah.

My daughters are very
opinionated about styling me

and helping me with my wardrobe.

And guess what? FYI, they're
usually right on the money.

A pencil skirt with,
like, red...

What about a leopard...

- Oh, God.
- I love this, actually.

Like, you know when they wear,
like, the short-sleeve, like,

you know, is that not a thing?

No. It is. I have one. Hold on.

I rarely will make that list
of "What Was She Thinking?"

Rarely.
Not with Delilah and Amelia.

I'm gonna take these shoes off.

You know when you gave me
Louis Vuitt...

Louboutins, or whatever
they were?

- Yeah?
- They were in my closet,

and they're not there anymore.

- There was three...
- I sold them.

I took them and I sold them.

- What?
- Let me just set

the record straight.

The Louboutins sat there
and sat there and sat there,

and she was never gonna wear
those Louboutins.

I took them and I sold them.

That's so mean.

You weren't gonna wear them.

I told you I was gonna
wear one of the colors.

Never.

She had no respect
for those Louboutins.

I'm Jane.

You're gonna be Steve, Maggie,
and Alex.

- That's a lot of people.
- You have to be everybody else.

- Okay.
- Steve and I

are business partners,
and we have decided

to invest in their tech company.

"So Alex, what do you do?"

"I make custom furniture."

"He made all the furniture
in my office."

My daughters don't really want
to run lines with me.

But when forced to,
they're good.

They're great, actually.

"Jane nods in agreement."

That's me.

- As the wait...
- Where is your line?

As the waiter approaches
with four glasses of champagne.

See, this is my kind of job.

I get to eat and I get to drink
at the same time.

And you have no lines.
See, that's the thing.

I have two more coming.

Okay. I have more than you.

This is the easiest day
I've ever had working.

"Hey guys,
I know you liked my furniture,

but this is too much."

Your lines are boring.

I hate running lines with you.

(Andy voiceover) Coming up...

This is where I grew up.

- Cute.
- Should we ring the door?

(Lisa R) Yeah.

Ding-dong, it's Yolanda Foster.

(Kyle)
What is this in the backseat?

It's not an animal. It's fake.

Oh, my God!

- It's just in case.
- What is that?

I want to lay in the back.

- Go on. Get in there.
- Oh, this is so comfy.

- Who does this?
- Well, when you get...

Who has this in a car?

For when you're drunk,
and you're being...

Oh, my God, this is amazing.

When you're drunk
and you're going home.

This is so good.

Whatever you want.

This is like out of a movie.

This is, like...

ridiculous. [laughs]

But I love it.

Will you just get out?

Well, pretend you're...
Like, Driving Miss Daisy,

- and let me ride in the back.
- Oh, "Driving Miss Lazy."

- Now get in the front.
- I just want to lay back here

and roll around for a while.

I don't want to sit up front.

- Get in the front.
- Oh, fine.

For God's sake.

I like these doors that open
the wrong way.

Oh, my gosh, I like this car.

Let's trade.

(Lisa)
See, it's no easy being me.

You think it is, but it's not.

(Kyle) It's very hard being you.

(Lisa) Alrighty. Let's go.

I'm not the tallest kid
on the block.

I love Brandi.

Brandi and I,
I always say we've come so far.

We're honest with each other,
we have fun together,

we play together.

Yet, we can also be truthful
with each other.

Serious issue to talk
to you about.

Your fáááing emojis.

- They're driving me...
- Do you love my emojis?

- No. I don't.
- Do you love my emojis?

Your texts, the hearts,
and the balloons,

and the teddy bears,
I feel like I'm reading

heiro-fáááing-glyphics.

Like, okay, putting this story
together through pictures.

They're part of my expression.

When I talk, I use my hands.

When I write, I use my emojis.
That's just Kim.

Do you know that I don't even
have to write a word?

I know that! I know that.

I could just put
happy face, heart,

and you will know what I mean.

I love that she's just nutty

and she doesn't really care
what anyone thinks.

- They just make me happy.
- They make me mad.

I don't know why.

I hate emojis.

And if you're a dude,
and you send emojis,

we're definitely never
making out.

And you probably suck dick

and someone forgot to tell you.

(Kristi)
Are you guys ready to work out,
ladies, huh?

- Yeah.
- Ready, ready.

- All right.
- All right.

I haven't worked out
in two months,

and my back is bad
and my pooch is kicking.

Come on, let's make your body
for perfect.

The reason I do Pilates
is so you can lay down

- while your ex tries.
- Let's make you more perfect,

Brandi, come over here.

Bend your knees to come in.
Exhale.

Bend. Bring them in more.

Kim, you're looking good.
You really are.

- Thanks.
- This is freaking hard.

Brandi and exercise.

- I can't do this.
- Brandi's... what?

Here, I take her to my Pilates
class and I'm working.

And Brandi's like...

She makes my workout
look like a day

on a cover of a magazine.

20 seconds, ladies.

Drive your... you've got it.

(Brandi) This is hard work.

Mama's not in shape right now,
at all.

Let's go get a breakfast
sandwich.

- Really?
- Yeah.

[laughs]

[playful music]

(Andy voiceover)
Even through Amsterdam,

the Kim and Brandi bond
remains strong.

Luckily, no glassware
was broken on a visit

on a visit to Yolanda's
childhood home.

Yay. Home sweet home.

- This is where I grew up.
- Cute.

This is my little house.

(Yolanda)
Should we ring the door?

- Yeah!
- Is that weird?

- You know these people?
- No. I've never met

- these people.
- No!

[doorbell dings]

(Lisa V)
This is a bit weird.
Come on.

Isn't it?

- Hello.
- Hello?

[speaking native language]

Ding-dong, it's Yolanda Foster.

I'm here to go into my house.

It's amazing.

I don't think that people
just do that.

But it's Yo.

And she can do whatever
the fááá she wants.

[speaking Spanish]

- Hello.
- Hello.

Oh, my gosh.

Yeah, it changed so much.
My God.

Is it weird for you to be here?

Yeah. You know, I just...

I just posted a picture
this morning

of my mom and I sitting here,
kissing.

- Yeah.
- Same beam. Same top.

That's where I used to sit
with my mommy;

And because it's winter,
it's always freezing.

I love that we're all getting
to see Yolanda's house

that she grew up in
since she was a little girl.

But now I want to see where
the horses are.

In Holland,
we didn't have limos.

You just had mules?

We just had horses.

Can I go and see my bedroom?

- Of course.
- Sure.

[speaking native language]

Okay.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, this is crazy.

You know,
this is the bedroom my...

This is my bedroom.

This was my bedroom
I grew up in.

How fun is that?
Does that not make you feel

really weird?

Where was your bed? Here?

Yeah.

I want to see the bathroom.

That's really important.

So this is my old bathroom.

The whole family had to live out
of this bathroom.

Everybody had to shower
one at a time.

Isn't that funny?

Well, that's how we normally
do it at home, too.

I really think it's important
for my girlfriends

to see and understand
where I came from.

Wow. This is amaz...
That's my mom's room.

My mom grew up in this bedroom.

Do you remember going in,
and, "Mom?"

[speaking at once]

A lot of memories here, right?

Yolanda's come a long way, baby.

A long way.

[Yolanda speaking
native language]

- My name.
- This lady's very, very nice.

She's gonna give me a shot.

She's not giving you a shot.

She's gonna give me a shot.

Ever since Portia
started talking,

we noticed that she had a hard
time pronouncing her Rs.

And we all love it.

But for me to see her feeling
self-conscious,

I can't do that to her.

Having confidence is the most
important thing in the world

for anyone.

- Hello.
- Hi, guys.

- This is Odelia.
- How are you?

- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

- I'm Odelia.
- I'm Kyle.

- Nice to meet you, Kyle.
- Nice to meet you.

Hi, princess.

Can I shake your hand?

Can I get a high five?

All right, let's go.

I've never done something
like this before.

All I know
is that the practicing

our Rs at home, on our own,
is not working.

- Pull this out for you.
- Do I sit here?

Of course.
You get to sit right there.

What are those?

Those are flavored
tongue depressors.

So you know what?

Did you know as we grow up,

sometimes we don't say our
sounds correctly.

- Right?
- Mm-hmm.

When I was a kid,
I didn't say my Ss

- and my Zs correctly.
- Mm-hmm.

If I wanted to "sun,"
I would say "thun."

If I wanted to say "zebra,"
I would say "thebra."

And then I had to learn
how to say my sounds correctly.

Can I hear you say "rabbit"?

- Rabbit.
- I have a rabbit game.

- Say it again.
- Rabbit.

It's just knowing
where to put your tongue.

Where to put your lips.

And then you will be able
to say it correctly

like everybody else.

- Okay?
- Mm-hmm.

Do you want to start playing
some games?

Mm-hmm.

I'll give you one, two, three,
four, five, six, seven cards.

You have to match the pictures.

What is this?

- A rose.
- Good.

Pucker your lips. Bring them out

like you're about to kiss
somebody.

Go.

Go, "rrrose."

- Rose.
- High five.

- Rrr.
- Rrr.

Tongue up. Like for "rabbit."

Rabbit.

[rolling tongue]

Go, "eh."

Huh?

"Eh."

- "Eh."
- "Eh."

"Errr"

"Errr."

There's your R, honey.

I'm so proud of you.

I think that she really wants
to fix this

and she's really trying.

Pretend like you're gonna kiss
someone.

- Like me.
- And pretend

like you're a duck.
Like you have a beak of a duck.

There you go. You got it.

We know some people
who look like that.

[laughter]

My lips feel weird.

- They get a little numb?
- Mm-hmm.

That's because
they're getting stronger.

Go, "ah."

- Ah.
- Go, "eh."

- Eh.
- "Errr."

Errr.

(both) Errr.

Mm-hmm. Again.

(all) Ehhh.

- Errr.

- Ehhh.

- Ahhh.
- Por-tia.

Por-tia.

I heard that R. Again.

Portia.

So she just has to practice it.

She's already getting it.

She strength is there.

So it's just like going
to the gym.

The moment I hear Portia
say her name,

I feel like it's gonna be
like...

I'm happy for her,
but don't grow up.

[murmuring] You did good...

You did a good job, honey.

- You did, I'm so proud of you.
- A very good job.

Portia, say thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you for coming
and playing with me today.

I had a blast.

- Hi.
- Hello.

- How are you?
- I'm Justin.

- Hi, Justin. Lisa Rinna.
- Nice to meet you. Pleasure.

- Nice to meet you.
- Welcome to day one.

I'm sorry I'm a little late.

- I'm never later. Ever.
- It's fine, it happens.

This is a very small role.

It's three days of work.

It's working perfectly
in my schedule right now.

Let's see, on-set time is going
to be 11:30.

Oh, we got plenty of time.

Yeah, we're kind of
ahead of schedule now.

- So we're kind of...
- Are we?

- Yes.
- That's unheard of.

It is unheard of.

I haven't acted in a while.
So I welcome it.

Now are you the actor that was
on Pretty Little Liars?

Still. Yeah.

- You still are?
- Yeah.

Oh, 'cause I don't watch it,
but my kids are crazy about it.

Fourth season, I'm doing seven.

Okay, so just tell me...
I'm sorry I'm so naive...

- I play the blind girl.
- You play the blind girl.

That's all you need
to tell them.

That's all I need to tell them.

- Tell them I'm nice.
- Oh, they're gonna...

'Cause they're gonna be like...

'cause I'm like
a horrible person.

- They're gonna flip.
- Yeah.

Like, they could care less
what I do, really.

But if I get to work
with someone like you,

I'm gonna get to go home
and say,

"Oh, excuse me,
guess who I worked with today."

And they'll flip their lids.

That's what's so fun
about getting to act.

You know, you get
to meet cool people.

And it's just fun to go to work.

It's fun to act.
It's fun to just go and play.

I was James Mars... Marsd...
Marsden's mom.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Forget it.

Oh, but you, I think,
take the cake.

- Oh, that's cool.
- I'm gonna say.

[upbeat music]

- You met Savage, right?
- Savage from that...

- Savage! Oh, it's you.
- I'm so sorry.

- It's you.
- It's me.

You have so much patience
with those psychos.

I had no idea it was you.

When they said Savage,
I just didn't put the two...

Yeah, yeah.
That's why I was surprised

you took the job
when you heard it was me.

- I'm just kidding.
- Right?

Well, I did try to pass on it.

- Oh, I know.
- I did.

All right, let's wire me.

We have the technology.

Whoo.

So...

Roll sound. Rolling.

- Background.
- And, action.

Oh, funny, I thought you said
his name was Brent.

- I... I did say that.
- Can you sit down?

- Sit down, Alex.
- Thank you.

(man)
Come on, you two.
Pull up a chair.

- Oh, thank you so much.
- Great.

(Savage)
Cutting.
One more like that.

(man)
We'll cut and we'll go again
right away.

Acting is one of the easiest
jobs on the planet.

Are you fáááing me?

And I'm probably
gonna be the only one

that tells you that.

They cater to every need.

It is so easy.

There's nothing hard about it.

What, are you kidding me?

You're gonna make us all
a lot of money.

(woman) This is amazing.

And cut. Cutting. Good.

And that's a wrap on Lisa Rinna.

- Yay.
- Can we get one of these

- every night?
- Yeah. Every night.

- Thank you so much.
- Nice meeting you.

(Andy voiceover) Coming up...

- Whoo.
- Sháá. Ah.

[both shouting]

And the game is over.

(Andy voiceover)
Despite arguments and tears,

outrageous behavior,
and acrimonious accusations,

the women of Beverly Hills
still know

how to have a good time
with an old friend.

I've got a dress
that goes both ways,

so I can lounge around

or I could muster up
a game of tennis in it.

We're... nobody's playing tennis.

Let's not fool ourselves.

I like going to Camille's,
you know,

it's a neutral ground.

So it'll be a quite nice place
just to catch up, really.

And also, I really want
to see Camille

and see how she's doing.

(Camille)
What are we putting together
here?

It's a cocktail. This champagne

is made for going over ice.

And that's a raspberry ice cube.

Champagne goes over that,
then we have these lovely

raspberries, which I'm injecting
with Chambord, uh...

It looks beautiful.

God, remember when we left
that night?

We walked down this little path.

- Let me just say this, okay?
- Yeah.

It may like a stupid...
- The sprinklers are coming on.

- Oh sháá.

- Did she turn them on?
- The psychic turned them on.

[laughter]

- Gorgeous.
- Thank you.

How are you?

[playful music]

(Kyle)
How are you? Oh, I
like your tennis outfit, too.

- Hey. Oh, yeah.
- What?

- Hi.
- Hi, Camille.

Your house is so gorgeous.

- Oh, thank you.
- My first time.

- Hey.
- Hello.

- How are you?
- Where's your tennis gear?

(Lisa V)
Because I'm here to play
a little game of tennis.

- Here we go.
- Oh, my God.

- Whoo.
- Okay. Can you imagine?

(Lisa V)
What are you... now,
what are you doing?

Okay. Trying to brake it
with heels is impossible.

(Lisa R) Look at that pond.

That is so gorgeous.

Lemons, limes, grapefruits

What a piece of property.

I love it when people are so
rich that it's just easy.

Thank you, Kelsey.

I have my pomegranates
right there.

- Look at this.
- Look at that.

So if anybody wants
a pomegranate...

- Where's your pomegranate?
- Right there.

(Lisa V) Go on, go get one.

Get a couple.

I always ride around
in a golf cart,

picking fruit
and looking at Camille's melons.

(Kyle)
Don't want to grab
the low-hanging fruit.

(Lisa R)
Look at us, we're like...

What are we grabbing
pomegranates from trees?

We're here to play tennis,
not picking fruit.

Come on. Let's get on with it.

(Camille)
Now, be careful of these stairs
when walk down, 'cause...

- Those are rocks.
- I'm changing my shoes.

- They're dangerous.
- I'm putting my tennies on

- for this.
- Here we go.

(Kyle)
I don't have a tennis racquet.

- Okay.
- Come on.

- Come on, darling.
- I can't.

Here, I'll wait
for you so you're not alone.

(Kyle) Well, thank you.

(Lisa V) How good are you?

(Lisa R)
Well, you'll have to wait
and see, won't you?

We all knew we were coming
to a tennis party.

I don't know why I'm the only
one dressed for the occasion.

[upbeat music]

(Lisa R)
These skirts are so ridiculous.

(Kyle)
My skirt's so tight.
I can hardly...

No, it's not appropriate attire,
but I don't give a sháá.

- It's hard to run.
- Oh, look at you.

The aggression's coming out...
Ah!

This is your typical
Beverly Hills tennis wear.

- Nice.
- Good one.

- Nice.
- Here.

(Lisa V) Where's our ball boy?

I know.

I think we got enough balls.

- What?
- Do we got enough balls?

- Um...
- We'll see how it goes so far.

Okay. You've got places to store
all those balls in?

I got plenty of space.

[upbeat music]

(Camille) Nice.

Nice, Lisa.

- Whoo.
- Sháá.

- Whoo.
- Ah.

[laughter]

- Oh, my gosh.
- And the game is over.

I like this group
because I feel like

I now have a life-long
connection.

It's nice
'cause we can have fun.

It feels freeing.

(Kyle)
Couldn't do that again
if you tried.

To learn more about the
Housewives, go to bravotv.com