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1
00:00:02,009 --> 00:00:02,220
[TV static drones]
2
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:05,219
[bright tone]
3
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:08,199
[soft upbeat music]
4
00:00:08,220 --> 00:00:11,220
- Come on, Green Dress!
- Ooh, thanks, Ally!
5
00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:13,070
- Come on, brand-new Red Shoes!
6
00:00:13,089 --> 00:00:14,210
- [chuckles]
Appreciate you, girl.
7
00:00:14,230 --> 00:00:15,220
Nordstrom's.
8
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:16,230
[tapping keyboard rapidly]
9
00:00:17,010 --> 00:00:18,179
- Jumpsuit!
Hello!
10
00:00:18,199 --> 00:00:20,149
Jumpsuit!
Let's go, Jumpsuit!
11
00:00:20,170 --> 00:00:22,170
- Yes!
You better romp!
12
00:00:22,190 --> 00:00:24,089
- Go on!
Connected top and bottom.
13
00:00:24,109 --> 00:00:25,140
[laughter]
14
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:26,210
- Come on, somebody!
15
00:00:26,230 --> 00:00:28,170
all: Amen!
16
00:00:28,190 --> 00:00:30,129
- No!
It's lit, it's lit!
17
00:00:30,149 --> 00:00:32,090
- Yeah, we are!
- We're lit!
18
00:00:32,109 --> 00:00:35,049
- Hey, Cute Sweater!
You on fire, girl.
19
00:00:35,070 --> 00:00:36,210
- Thank you.
20
00:00:36,229 --> 00:00:39,060
[dramatic music]
21
00:00:39,079 --> 00:00:41,140
- Let's go.
Come through, ladies!
22
00:00:41,159 --> 00:00:44,109
- Ally's right!
We look too cute to eat inside.
23
00:00:44,130 --> 00:00:45,189
Let's go out for lunch.
24
00:00:45,210 --> 00:00:46,229
- Ooh!
- Yes!
25
00:00:47,009 --> 00:00:48,229
Let's go to When Pigs Fry.
I love a lunchtime rib.
26
00:00:49,009 --> 00:00:49,229
- Ooh, yes!
27
00:00:50,009 --> 00:00:51,109
I'm a vegan, but
28
00:00:51,130 --> 00:00:52,149
I still be eatin' ribs.
29
00:00:52,170 --> 00:00:54,200
[laughter]
- You nasty, you nasty!
30
00:00:54,219 --> 00:00:56,229
[giddy laughter]
[tense music]
31
00:00:57,009 --> 00:00:58,119
[klaxon blaring]
- Oh, okay.
32
00:00:58,140 --> 00:01:00,039
[chuckles]
Come through, Fire Alarm.
33
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,229
I hear you giving me
better-late-than-never-
34
00:01:02,009 --> 00:01:03,140
let-me-make-sure-this-
is-a-real-fire-
35
00:01:03,159 --> 00:01:06,060
and-not-just-a-drill energy.
[chuckles]
36
00:01:06,079 --> 00:01:10,060
Fire Alarm, sis, I'ma head out,
but you keep doing you, okay?
37
00:01:10,079 --> 00:01:11,129
Telling us what's going on.
38
00:01:11,150 --> 00:01:13,069
It's a fire in here.
I hear you.
39
00:01:13,090 --> 00:01:14,069
I hear you said,
40
00:01:14,090 --> 00:01:15,200
"[imitates klaxon
rhythmically]"
41
00:01:15,219 --> 00:01:20,180
I was like, "[imitates
klaxon rhythmically]"
42
00:01:20,200 --> 00:01:23,060
[chuckles]
Okay. Bye, sis.
43
00:01:23,079 --> 00:01:26,069
This is the as-best-os fire
I ever seen.
44
00:01:26,090 --> 00:01:27,069
Look at this building.
45
00:01:27,090 --> 00:01:28,170
Talking 'bout
Smoke, Wind, and Fire.
46
00:01:28,189 --> 00:01:31,060
Y'all my favorite band.
[laughs]
47
00:01:33,020 --> 00:01:35,000
- ♪ Here's a little story
'bout a raw-ass bitch ♪
48
00:01:35,020 --> 00:01:37,069
♪ That'll take yo' man
like she take that dick ♪
49
00:01:37,090 --> 00:01:39,159
♪ She got 99 problems
but a bitch ain't one ♪
50
00:01:39,180 --> 00:01:40,200
♪ She like
strapped street niggas ♪
51
00:01:40,219 --> 00:01:42,009
♪ Who gon' run them funds ♪
52
00:01:42,030 --> 00:01:44,079
♪ I got a gang of bitches who
gon' see 'bout me ♪
53
00:01:44,099 --> 00:01:46,180
♪ Quick to run up in your
shit, ho, one, two, three ♪
54
00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,229
♪ Selling out 'bout me,
I still remain untouched ♪
55
00:01:49,009 --> 00:01:51,039
♪ I just walk through them hos
and drop my nuts ♪
56
00:01:51,060 --> 00:01:53,180
♪ Your baby daddy fell in
love, I just wanted to fuck ♪
57
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:56,000
♪ I just wanted the cash,
all he wanted was us ♪
58
00:01:56,020 --> 00:01:58,079
♪ Take a blunt to the face
while he rubbing my butt ♪
59
00:01:58,099 --> 00:01:59,150
♪ Countin' money
in my panties ♪
60
00:01:59,170 --> 00:02:00,180
♪ That shit give me rush ♪
61
00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:01,219
♪ And be like ♪
62
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,019
♪ Go, girl,
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
63
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:04,069
♪ Get a bag, make 'em mad ♪
64
00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:06,040
♪ Bitch, you bad
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
65
00:02:06,060 --> 00:02:07,180
♪ Go, girl,
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
66
00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:09,009
♪ Make a mess,
leave 'em pressed ♪
67
00:02:09,030 --> 00:02:10,219
♪ You the best
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
68
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,120
♪ Go, girl,
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
69
00:02:12,139 --> 00:02:13,180
♪ Get a bag, make 'em mad ♪
70
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,110
♪ Bitch, you bad
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
71
00:02:15,129 --> 00:02:17,050
♪ Go, girl,
wit' yo' fine ass ♪
72
00:02:17,069 --> 00:02:18,060
♪ Make a mess-- ♪
73
00:02:25,020 --> 00:02:27,009
♪ Dip wit' it
'cause you a truck wit' it ♪
74
00:02:27,030 --> 00:02:28,210
♪ Now do a half foot,
now put yo' hips in it ♪
75
00:02:28,229 --> 00:02:29,229
♪ Let me see you do it ♪
76
00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:33,219
- You know where
I'm president?
77
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,170
My fly-ass,
apocalypse-proof house.
78
00:02:36,189 --> 00:02:38,120
And I know you all
don't believe me,
79
00:02:38,139 --> 00:02:40,150
but it is real, okay?
80
00:02:40,170 --> 00:02:42,129
And guess who's going
back there?
81
00:02:42,150 --> 00:02:44,129
Me and only me!
[cackles]
82
00:02:44,150 --> 00:02:46,180
So good luck surviving
without the cool one!
83
00:02:48,079 --> 00:02:50,079
[quirky upbeat music]
84
00:02:52,050 --> 00:02:53,139
- Honestly?
Fine.
85
00:02:53,159 --> 00:02:55,050
I don't have to live like this.
86
00:02:55,069 --> 00:02:56,219
I can go create my own country
87
00:02:57,000 --> 00:03:00,039
and when you're all ready
to admit that I'm right,
88
00:03:00,060 --> 00:03:01,169
you can apply for visas.
89
00:03:01,189 --> 00:03:02,189
And guess what?
90
00:03:02,210 --> 00:03:06,030
The process is very long
and needlessly complicated.
91
00:03:06,050 --> 00:03:08,020
- Fine.
I'm out.
92
00:03:08,039 --> 00:03:10,000
Just like Beyoncé said:
93
00:03:10,020 --> 00:03:13,180
It's gon' be me, myself,
and I'ma be my own best friend.
94
00:03:13,199 --> 00:03:15,020
Hey!
95
00:03:15,039 --> 00:03:16,099
- Well, good idea.
96
00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:18,180
You all leave.
Let me work out in peace.
97
00:03:18,199 --> 00:03:20,170
- Can I stay?
I like to work out.
98
00:03:20,189 --> 00:03:22,199
I mean, I've never tried it,
but it sounds cool.
99
00:03:22,219 --> 00:03:23,180
- We start at 4:00 a.m. sharp.
100
00:03:23,199 --> 00:03:24,229
- I'll do whatever it takes.
101
00:03:25,009 --> 00:03:26,150
All I wanted was for us
to be together like a family.
102
00:03:26,170 --> 00:03:28,189
- Oh, cut the sister act,
Whoopi Goldberg.
103
00:03:28,210 --> 00:03:30,170
- I didn't want things to end
like this.
104
00:03:30,189 --> 00:03:32,069
- Everything ends like this.
105
00:03:32,090 --> 00:03:33,229
Xscape, the Beatles...
106
00:03:34,009 --> 00:03:35,139
[softly]
B2K.
107
00:03:35,159 --> 00:03:37,229
- I used to be the strategic
bandana placement officer
108
00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:40,050
for B2K and my--
- Oh, shut up!
109
00:03:40,069 --> 00:03:42,129
- Oh, now we screamin'
at people to shut up?
110
00:03:42,150 --> 00:03:44,030
What is this, my childhood?
111
00:03:44,050 --> 00:03:46,120
- Mm-mm, mm-mm, mm-mm,
mm-mm-mm.
112
00:03:46,139 --> 00:03:47,120
No.
113
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:49,150
We all should just pack
our shit.
114
00:03:49,170 --> 00:03:53,060
And yes, I came with nothing
and I'm leaving with something.
115
00:03:53,079 --> 00:03:55,060
You want a family, huh, huh?
116
00:03:55,079 --> 00:03:56,150
You want some family?
117
00:03:56,170 --> 00:03:58,159
Well, that's what it's like!
118
00:04:00,180 --> 00:04:02,180
[dramatic music]
journalists: Olivia! Olivia!
119
00:04:02,199 --> 00:04:04,139
[overlapping shouted questions]
120
00:04:04,159 --> 00:04:05,180
- How was the date?
121
00:04:05,199 --> 00:04:07,180
[shouting continues]
122
00:04:07,199 --> 00:04:08,210
- Yeah, look,
123
00:04:08,229 --> 00:04:10,069
things did not go according
to plan out there tonight,
124
00:04:10,090 --> 00:04:11,150
but I'll take some questions.
Go ahead.
125
00:04:11,169 --> 00:04:14,039
- Olivia, hi.
Laura James, "Skins Weekly."
126
00:04:14,060 --> 00:04:15,039
Tough date tonight.
127
00:04:15,060 --> 00:04:17,019
Can you tell us
what went wrong?
128
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,199
- Yeah. Everything.
I mean, you guys saw it.
129
00:04:18,220 --> 00:04:21,000
I was too focused on rebounding
and not enough on scoring.
130
00:04:21,019 --> 00:04:22,100
Next?
journalists: Olivia! Olivia!
131
00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:23,170
- Omega Bell, DTF Sports.
132
00:04:23,189 --> 00:04:26,040
This was your first time going
head-to-head with Team Terrell.
133
00:04:26,060 --> 00:04:27,060
Can you walk us though
your strategy?
134
00:04:27,079 --> 00:04:29,019
- Sure. My strategy was
to play hard-to-get.
135
00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:31,139
I waited a regulation three
days before returning his text,
136
00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:34,040
but obviously,
Terrell is a tough competitor
137
00:04:34,060 --> 00:04:36,000
and he really stuck
with his game plan.
138
00:04:36,019 --> 00:04:38,029
- Uh, Briana Payne,
"Ding-a-ling Digest."
139
00:04:38,050 --> 00:04:39,110
How would you say
140
00:04:39,129 --> 00:04:41,149
Terrell stacked up
against other players
141
00:04:41,170 --> 00:04:44,189
like Trent or Corey or Kevin
142
00:04:44,209 --> 00:04:46,199
or Steve or Mike
143
00:04:46,220 --> 00:04:48,230
or James or Tommy
144
00:04:49,009 --> 00:04:50,019
or Tom?
145
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,019
- Bubba?
- Bubba.
146
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,159
- Reggie, too.
- I mean, a lot of dates.
147
00:04:52,180 --> 00:04:53,220
- Oh, okay.
148
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,090
Well, Trent and Corey were both
above 6'3", you know?
149
00:04:55,110 --> 00:04:58,090
So with Terrell, I initially
felt undermatched.
150
00:04:58,110 --> 00:04:59,220
[overlapping shouted questions]
151
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,050
- Earlier in your career,
152
00:05:01,069 --> 00:05:02,100
you'd come right out and try
to smash your opponents.
153
00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:03,209
Tonight, you took it easy.
Why?
154
00:05:03,230 --> 00:05:05,100
- Look,
a-at the end of the day,
155
00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,170
I'm used to shooting my shot,
you know?
156
00:05:07,189 --> 00:05:10,050
But Terrell came out and he's
such a seasoned vet, you know?
157
00:05:10,069 --> 00:05:11,050
It just didn't seem smart
158
00:05:11,069 --> 00:05:12,170
to try to take it straight
to the hole.
159
00:05:12,189 --> 00:05:15,040
- Laura James, "Skins Weekly."
Let's talk stats.
160
00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:16,089
You had a few fouls tonight.
161
00:05:16,110 --> 00:05:18,000
Let's talk about
your reach-in foul
162
00:05:18,019 --> 00:05:19,160
where you pretended to go
for the check.
163
00:05:19,180 --> 00:05:21,160
- I think the ref made
a tough call there, okay?
164
00:05:21,180 --> 00:05:23,160
You know, it was clear that my
opponent came to pay tonight.
165
00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:25,060
[overlapping shouted questions]
166
00:05:25,079 --> 00:05:27,209
- Olivia, you were almost
ejected from the restaurant
167
00:05:27,230 --> 00:05:29,120
for yelling at a waiter.
168
00:05:29,139 --> 00:05:32,170
Do you think it was your temper
that cost you the date tonight?
169
00:05:32,189 --> 00:05:34,149
- I would say that Terrell's
negging put me on the defense.
170
00:05:34,170 --> 00:05:35,159
Talkin' 'bout some,
171
00:05:35,180 --> 00:05:37,029
"I usually date models,
but you cool."
172
00:05:37,050 --> 00:05:38,180
Look, fans know I play
with a lot of heart,
173
00:05:38,199 --> 00:05:40,110
and I'm not proud of what I did
out there tonight.
174
00:05:40,129 --> 00:05:42,090
♪ ♪
175
00:05:42,110 --> 00:05:43,129
But you know what?
176
00:05:43,149 --> 00:05:44,230
Nobody's talking about
the ref's bullshit calls, okay?
177
00:05:45,009 --> 00:05:47,120
My opponent clearly drooled
over his meal twice.
178
00:05:47,139 --> 00:05:48,149
That was double dribbling.
179
00:05:48,170 --> 00:05:50,110
[overlapping shouted questions]
180
00:05:50,129 --> 00:05:51,170
- With a loss like this--
181
00:05:51,189 --> 00:05:54,100
sorry.
Laura James, "Skins Weekly."
182
00:05:54,120 --> 00:05:56,230
What does this mean for
the rest of the cuffing season?
183
00:05:57,009 --> 00:05:57,230
- It doesn't look great,
184
00:05:58,009 --> 00:05:59,090
but I'm hoping I can turn
everything around
185
00:05:59,110 --> 00:06:01,050
and end the season with a ring.
186
00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,100
- With loss after loss,
187
00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:06,160
you still think marriage
is on the table
188
00:06:06,180 --> 00:06:07,199
for you?
189
00:06:07,220 --> 00:06:09,149
Personally?
190
00:06:09,170 --> 00:06:11,029
Oh, you--oh, you do?
[clears throat]
191
00:06:11,050 --> 00:06:12,100
- My sources are telling me
192
00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:15,050
that you've been considering
switching to another team.
193
00:06:15,069 --> 00:06:17,069
Are you thinking about
a crossover to women?
194
00:06:17,089 --> 00:06:19,029
- Look, I've taken a lot
of lickings in my career
195
00:06:19,050 --> 00:06:21,110
and I'm always open
to strapping on a new uniform.
196
00:06:21,129 --> 00:06:22,220
- Olivia--
197
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,160
who are these people?
198
00:06:24,180 --> 00:06:26,079
You told me you was going
to the bathroom.
199
00:06:26,100 --> 00:06:28,149
- Terrell! Terrell!
Who is your braider?
200
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:30,230
- Terrell! Hey!
It's me, Laura!
201
00:06:31,009 --> 00:06:33,069
Hey! Laura James!
[overlapping shouted questions]
202
00:06:33,090 --> 00:06:35,029
- Are you Tinder-headed,
Terrell?
203
00:06:35,050 --> 00:06:37,069
- Okay, let's go. Yeah.
Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead.
204
00:06:37,090 --> 00:06:39,139
- Terrell, you had turnover
after turnover tonight.
205
00:06:39,159 --> 00:06:40,139
Care to comment?
206
00:06:40,159 --> 00:06:41,180
- I mean,
what can I really say?
207
00:06:41,199 --> 00:06:43,220
I really just love pastries,
man. Next question.
208
00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,050
- Is that why you chose
the two braids?
209
00:06:46,069 --> 00:06:48,090
- You were called out
for being on your phone
210
00:06:48,110 --> 00:06:50,040
multiple times
throughout the night.
211
00:06:50,060 --> 00:06:51,180
Were you expressing interest
in other teams?
212
00:06:51,199 --> 00:06:53,069
- No, no, not at all.
213
00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:55,019
She kept using words
that I didn't know,
214
00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,110
so I was on Google.
It was nothing but net.
215
00:06:57,129 --> 00:07:00,040
- What does this game mean for
both your teams moving forward?
216
00:07:00,060 --> 00:07:01,040
- For me, personally,
217
00:07:01,060 --> 00:07:03,000
I was focusing on scoring
in the fourth quarter,
218
00:07:03,019 --> 00:07:05,040
but I definitely think
I can bring some more D
219
00:07:05,060 --> 00:07:06,199
in overtime, if you're down.
220
00:07:06,220 --> 00:07:07,220
- Yes.
221
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,079
Um, and I've been working
on my ballhandling, so.
222
00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:10,089
- Oh.
223
00:07:10,110 --> 00:07:11,129
- So it's not so rough anymore.
- Oh, oh.
224
00:07:11,149 --> 00:07:12,120
- Okay.
225
00:07:12,139 --> 00:07:13,139
- So it ain't gonna hurt?
226
00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:14,170
- Uh, it might.
[giggles]
227
00:07:14,189 --> 00:07:16,170
[overlapping shouted questions]
228
00:07:16,189 --> 00:07:18,120
- Olivia, Olivia!
How was your date?
229
00:07:18,139 --> 00:07:20,189
- Terrell, Terrell!
Are those your baby hairs?
230
00:07:20,209 --> 00:07:22,189
Were you inspired by Omarion?
231
00:07:24,209 --> 00:07:26,199
[soft upbeat music]
232
00:07:26,220 --> 00:07:28,110
[indistinct chatter]
233
00:07:28,129 --> 00:07:30,040
- Crystal!
234
00:07:30,060 --> 00:07:31,089
Are you wanted for murder,
girl?
235
00:07:31,110 --> 00:07:33,129
Because you killin' 'em
in that jumpsuit!
236
00:07:33,149 --> 00:07:34,129
- This jumpsuit?
- Yes, that jumpsuit!
237
00:07:34,149 --> 00:07:36,029
- This jumpsuit?
- Sex!
238
00:07:36,050 --> 00:07:38,000
[laughter]
239
00:07:38,019 --> 00:07:39,079
Where'd you get it?
240
00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:41,009
- Girl, it's vintage,
but thank you, Fantasia.
241
00:07:41,029 --> 00:07:42,220
- Oh!
Of course it is.
242
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,149
You always find
all the cute stuff.
243
00:07:44,170 --> 00:07:46,139
And you know how hard that is
in our size.
244
00:07:46,159 --> 00:07:47,129
- Don't I, though?
245
00:07:47,149 --> 00:07:48,170
Don't you hate
246
00:07:48,189 --> 00:07:49,209
when you find something
that would've been cute
247
00:07:49,230 --> 00:07:52,060
until they added
the leopard print, ruffles,
248
00:07:52,079 --> 00:07:53,110
or leopard print ruffles?
249
00:07:53,129 --> 00:07:55,090
I am not trying to dress like
my mama's couch.
250
00:07:55,110 --> 00:07:56,220
[laughter]
251
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,050
- Halle!
Oh, I'm so glad you made it.
252
00:07:59,069 --> 00:08:01,160
- Oh, you think I'd miss
my girl's first housewarming?
253
00:08:01,180 --> 00:08:03,199
You made it very clear
our presence was mandatory.
254
00:08:03,220 --> 00:08:05,089
- That's true.
[laughter]
255
00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:08,160
[tense orchestral music]
256
00:08:08,180 --> 00:08:11,040
- That's a--that's a
really cute jumpsuit, Halle.
257
00:08:11,060 --> 00:08:12,149
- Oh.
Thank you, girl.
258
00:08:12,170 --> 00:08:14,009
You know I love me some ASOS.
259
00:08:14,029 --> 00:08:16,220
Hey!
I guess I'm not the only one!
260
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,149
Twinsies!
- [laughing]
261
00:08:19,170 --> 00:08:21,089
Not really.
You know, hers is vintage.
262
00:08:21,110 --> 00:08:22,149
Right, Crystal?
263
00:08:22,170 --> 00:08:24,100
- Mm-hmm.
264
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:25,100
Vintage.
265
00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:26,100
♪ ♪
266
00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:29,019
- Well, vintage looks good
on you.
267
00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:31,100
[chuckles]
- Thank you, Halle.
268
00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:33,200
[clinking glass]
269
00:08:33,220 --> 00:08:35,019
First off,
270
00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:37,100
I just want to thank everyone
for coming to my housewarming.
271
00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:38,100
As you guys--
- So we just gonna
272
00:08:38,120 --> 00:08:39,190
act like y'all not wearing
the same jumpsuit?
273
00:08:39,210 --> 00:08:40,220
[dramatic orchestral flourish]
274
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,049
- Fantasia, chill.
So the jumpsuits look alike.
275
00:08:43,070 --> 00:08:44,090
So what?
276
00:08:44,110 --> 00:08:46,210
- They don't just look alike.
They're identical.
277
00:08:46,230 --> 00:08:49,139
I mean, y'all can switch
at summer camp.
278
00:08:49,159 --> 00:08:51,100
They're "Parent Trap"-ing
y'all.
279
00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:53,029
- Move on dot org.
280
00:08:53,049 --> 00:08:54,169
It's not the same jumpsuit.
281
00:08:54,190 --> 00:08:57,009
Anyway--[chuckles]
As I was saying.
282
00:08:57,029 --> 00:08:58,019
Now that I live alone,
283
00:08:58,039 --> 00:08:59,169
the thing that I'm looking
forward to most
284
00:08:59,190 --> 00:09:01,210
is getting to walk around
naked.
285
00:09:01,230 --> 00:09:03,100
- I've lived with her
and having a roommate
286
00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:05,100
has never stopped her
from walking around naked.
287
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:06,139
[laughter]
- [clears throat loudly]
288
00:09:06,159 --> 00:09:07,190
I wanna see the tag.
289
00:09:07,210 --> 00:09:09,000
[dramatic orchestral flourish]
290
00:09:09,019 --> 00:09:10,110
Well, if it's not
the same jumpsuit,
291
00:09:10,129 --> 00:09:12,200
then it won't have
the same tag.
292
00:09:12,220 --> 00:09:15,019
We wanna see the tag.
293
00:09:15,039 --> 00:09:17,049
- We don't, Fantasia.
294
00:09:17,070 --> 00:09:18,110
We just came here to judge
her throw pillows,
295
00:09:18,129 --> 00:09:19,200
be nice to her sister
for the Sephora discount,
296
00:09:19,220 --> 00:09:21,039
and get out of here.
It's not that serious.
297
00:09:21,059 --> 00:09:22,070
- What's wrong with
my throw pillows?
298
00:09:22,090 --> 00:09:23,110
They're vintage!
299
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:24,129
Like the jumpsuit.
300
00:09:24,149 --> 00:09:26,009
- Liar.
[dramatic orchestral flourish]
301
00:09:26,029 --> 00:09:29,000
- Okay, you know what?
Don't believe me?
302
00:09:29,019 --> 00:09:31,169
Here.
Check the tag.
303
00:09:31,190 --> 00:09:33,179
♪ ♪
304
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,120
- It's gone.
There is no tag.
305
00:09:36,139 --> 00:09:37,179
- Thank you, Tarni.
306
00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:40,220
And if there are no further
questions, Annalise Keating--
307
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:45,009
- No, she lied about where
she got the jumpsuit.
308
00:09:45,029 --> 00:09:47,159
Y'all didn't think that
she thought to cut the tag out?
309
00:09:47,179 --> 00:09:49,230
I mean, come on!
[exclaims breathlessly]
310
00:09:50,009 --> 00:09:52,139
Plus, ASOS hasn't even been
around long enough
311
00:09:52,159 --> 00:09:54,129
to be considered vintage.
312
00:09:54,149 --> 00:09:59,029
- According to Wikipedia, ASOS
was founded in June of 2000.
313
00:09:59,049 --> 00:10:01,070
[dramatic orchestral flourish]
- Really, Tasha? You, too?
314
00:10:01,090 --> 00:10:02,120
Hmm, okay.
315
00:10:02,139 --> 00:10:04,220
Uh, everybody stop being nice
to my sister.
316
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,110
Sephora let her go.
317
00:10:06,129 --> 00:10:08,139
- Also according to Wikipedia,
318
00:10:08,159 --> 00:10:14,070
an item starts being vintage
once it's been 20 years old.
319
00:10:14,090 --> 00:10:16,190
H-how long has it been?
320
00:10:19,110 --> 00:10:21,070
- It--it's been 21 years.
321
00:10:21,090 --> 00:10:23,169
Y'all should not need
calculators for that.
322
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:24,230
It's very disappointing.
323
00:10:25,009 --> 00:10:27,110
- If she bought it from ASOS,
324
00:10:27,129 --> 00:10:30,009
it would've come in one of
those composition-printed bags.
325
00:10:30,029 --> 00:10:31,190
[scoffs]
326
00:10:31,210 --> 00:10:33,049
Everybody check the trash.
327
00:10:33,070 --> 00:10:37,090
- No, hey! Stop it! Stop!
This is ridiculous!
328
00:10:37,110 --> 00:10:41,019
Hey, respect me!
I am a homeowner!
329
00:10:41,039 --> 00:10:42,210
Okay, you know what?
Here, fine.
330
00:10:42,230 --> 00:10:44,210
Here's the bag.
I lied, okay?
331
00:10:44,230 --> 00:10:46,049
Are you happy now?
332
00:10:46,070 --> 00:10:48,210
- I knew it.
- So what, Fantasia?
333
00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:51,200
You, of all people,
should know what it feels like
334
00:10:51,220 --> 00:10:54,000
to always end up at the party
335
00:10:54,019 --> 00:10:55,200
dressed like
the other big girl.
336
00:10:55,220 --> 00:10:57,169
And then here comes someone
talking about,
337
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:59,159
"Oh, y'all have to take
a picture"
338
00:10:59,179 --> 00:11:01,039
talkin' 'bout some twins.
339
00:11:01,059 --> 00:11:03,220
I am so tired
of going to the mall
340
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:06,139
and hovering over a table
of 8s and 10s
341
00:11:06,159 --> 00:11:09,129
hoping they'll magically merge
into an 18.
342
00:11:09,149 --> 00:11:11,149
Nobody makes cute clothes
for us!
343
00:11:11,169 --> 00:11:14,129
And when they do,
everybody jumps on it.
344
00:11:14,149 --> 00:11:16,059
Like Soya.
345
00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:17,059
- Ooh!
346
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:18,059
- Look at her!
347
00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:19,200
Trying to skinnily sneak out
of the party!
348
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:22,139
- We can see you.
You're not that skinny.
349
00:11:22,159 --> 00:11:24,080
Shop in your own section!
350
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,139
- It don't look cute baggy?
351
00:11:25,159 --> 00:11:27,179
- Way to ruin the party, Soya!
352
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,190
- [softly]
Okay. Lesson learned.
353
00:11:28,210 --> 00:11:29,210
- You know what?
354
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:33,049
I am tired of talking
about this damn jumpsuit.
355
00:11:33,070 --> 00:11:35,009
You want it so bad?
Here!
356
00:11:35,029 --> 00:11:38,019
- Girl!
I got the same one!
357
00:11:38,039 --> 00:11:40,059
- God damn it!
Anybody else got my shit on?
358
00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:43,039
Y'all wanna copy me so bad,
copy my bad oral hygiene!
359
00:11:43,059 --> 00:11:45,049
I need 13 root canals
right now.
360
00:11:45,070 --> 00:11:47,049
Copy my financial illiteracy!
361
00:11:47,070 --> 00:11:48,169
I've only been in this house
three weeks
362
00:11:48,190 --> 00:11:50,029
and I am already underwater.
363
00:11:50,049 --> 00:11:52,149
Who's trying to copy that shit,
huh?
364
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:54,070
Fuck!
[dramatic orchestral flourish]
365
00:11:55,169 --> 00:11:58,029
- All right, so okay.
- Yeah.
366
00:11:58,049 --> 00:12:00,110
- Okay.
That's for Kimmie and me.
367
00:12:00,129 --> 00:12:02,129
- And for my girl, of course.
- Yeah.
368
00:12:02,149 --> 00:12:04,190
- Happy birthday, Bernice!
[laughter]
369
00:12:04,210 --> 00:12:07,149
- Here's mine. All ones because
I had a good night at the club.
370
00:12:07,169 --> 00:12:08,230
[laughter]
371
00:12:09,009 --> 00:12:09,230
- Thanks, y'all!
372
00:12:10,009 --> 00:12:11,110
I know some of y'all
only half-employed,
373
00:12:11,129 --> 00:12:14,149
but I appreciate you
throwing me this dinner!
374
00:12:14,169 --> 00:12:16,059
- Uh-oh.
- What?
375
00:12:16,080 --> 00:12:18,139
- Did Tony use his
Terrence Howard math again?
376
00:12:18,159 --> 00:12:19,159
- Oh, this what we doin' now?
377
00:12:19,179 --> 00:12:22,029
- Actually, we're--we're good.
[chuckles]
378
00:12:22,049 --> 00:12:23,090
- You sure?
379
00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:24,179
'Cause I forgot to give my kids
they lunch money today,
380
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,179
so I can pitch in.
381
00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:27,070
- No, girl.
It's your birthday.
382
00:12:27,090 --> 00:12:31,029
And also, we are right on
the money, tip and everything.
383
00:12:31,049 --> 00:12:32,049
Huh.
384
00:12:32,070 --> 00:12:35,129
[slow mysterious music]
385
00:12:35,149 --> 00:12:36,120
[yelps]
386
00:12:36,139 --> 00:12:38,179
[all shouting]
387
00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:42,029
- Greetings, oh wise
and math-tastical ones!
388
00:12:42,049 --> 00:12:45,110
I am the get down
with the markdown,
389
00:12:45,129 --> 00:12:49,149
the get up with the pay up,
and the price is always right
390
00:12:49,169 --> 00:12:51,080
genie of the check.
391
00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:55,019
You may call me Sir Charge.
392
00:12:55,039 --> 00:12:56,230
- What the fuck was in
these drinks?
393
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,230
- Old Mello Yello
and a leftover Zima.
394
00:12:59,009 --> 00:13:00,009
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah. That makes sense.
395
00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:01,049
- Zima's weird.
- Yeah.
396
00:13:01,070 --> 00:13:03,070
- I'm sorry,
are we not gonna acknowledge
397
00:13:03,090 --> 00:13:05,149
that this blue nigga
just popped out of the check?
398
00:13:05,169 --> 00:13:07,090
- In the history of the world,
399
00:13:07,110 --> 00:13:09,049
there has never been
a group of Black people
400
00:13:09,070 --> 00:13:12,029
who have split a check
with such precision!
401
00:13:12,049 --> 00:13:13,039
- What?
402
00:13:13,059 --> 00:13:15,019
You mean never-ever?
403
00:13:15,039 --> 00:13:17,049
- Even the real women
from "Hidden Figures" couldn't
404
00:13:17,070 --> 00:13:20,169
calculate the correct
appetizer shared ratio.
405
00:13:20,190 --> 00:13:21,169
[chuckles]
406
00:13:21,190 --> 00:13:22,169
- Well, just call
me Bobby Brown,
407
00:13:22,190 --> 00:13:24,009
'cause I'm doing
that new addition.
408
00:13:24,029 --> 00:13:25,070
[laughter]
409
00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:28,090
- And due to your
numerical dexterity,
410
00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:32,049
I will grant ya one wish.
411
00:13:32,070 --> 00:13:34,009
- Wait.
Get the fuck outta here.
412
00:13:34,029 --> 00:13:35,190
- As you wish.
413
00:13:35,210 --> 00:13:36,200
all: No!
414
00:13:36,220 --> 00:13:37,230
- I'm sorry.
415
00:13:38,009 --> 00:13:40,080
That's not what I meant.
416
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:41,159
- Very well.
417
00:13:41,179 --> 00:13:43,230
Because you finally released me
from me prison,
418
00:13:44,009 --> 00:13:45,120
I'll let that one slide.
419
00:13:45,139 --> 00:13:47,169
But from now on, you must
choose your words wisely,
420
00:13:47,190 --> 00:13:51,000
because once your wish
is granted,
421
00:13:51,019 --> 00:13:52,129
you don't get another.
- Okay.
422
00:13:52,149 --> 00:13:55,139
- I'm sorry, there's a genie--
[scoffs]
423
00:13:55,159 --> 00:13:57,019
In Outback?
424
00:13:57,039 --> 00:13:58,029
Steakhouse.
425
00:13:58,049 --> 00:13:59,029
- I know, right?
426
00:13:59,049 --> 00:14:00,139
You'd think he'd be at Spago's.
427
00:14:00,159 --> 00:14:03,220
Anyway, how 'bout you guys
take one for the team
428
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,009
and we use the wish
to get me my dream man?
429
00:14:06,029 --> 00:14:08,059
- Okay, uh-uh.
You being selfish, okay?
430
00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:09,059
We need to wish for something
431
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:10,210
that's good for all of us,
okay?
432
00:14:10,230 --> 00:14:11,230
How 'bout...
433
00:14:12,009 --> 00:14:13,090
rain that doesn't mess up
our hair?
434
00:14:13,110 --> 00:14:15,000
- Oh, that's a good idea!
- I'm down. Bet.
435
00:14:15,019 --> 00:14:16,169
- That's not for all of us.
436
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:18,110
Precipitation
and my Boris Kodjoe
437
00:14:18,129 --> 00:14:21,169
get along just fine, so y'all
need to learn how to wish.
438
00:14:21,190 --> 00:14:23,090
See, that's what's wrong
with y'all females, man.
439
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:24,090
all: Females?
440
00:14:24,110 --> 00:14:26,169
- I wish a nigga would call us
females again!
441
00:14:26,190 --> 00:14:28,049
- No, no, no!
That's a wish!
442
00:14:28,070 --> 00:14:29,200
- Oh!
- Oh, you're good.
443
00:14:29,220 --> 00:14:32,210
I may be blue,
but I am a Black genie.
444
00:14:32,230 --> 00:14:35,049
So I'm very familiar
with the wish/would exception.
445
00:14:35,070 --> 00:14:36,059
[bell rings]
446
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:37,129
- We really gonna talk
about wishes,
447
00:14:37,149 --> 00:14:39,070
we should wish for
my favorite pair of Jays
448
00:14:39,090 --> 00:14:42,080
in every single colorway,
past and future,
449
00:14:42,100 --> 00:14:44,029
and for my album
to go platinum.
450
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,029
- What album?
451
00:14:45,049 --> 00:14:46,090
- Eh, every nigga got a album.
452
00:14:46,110 --> 00:14:47,200
- Every nigga got an album.
- Yeah.
453
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:49,169
- How 'bout we wish
for no kids?
454
00:14:49,190 --> 00:14:51,059
Don't tell my kids.
455
00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:52,070
- Well, it is
Bernice's birthday,
456
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:55,039
so if we're not gonna get me
Reginald VelJohnson,
457
00:14:55,059 --> 00:14:56,210
we might as well get her
her little wish.
458
00:14:56,230 --> 00:14:58,120
[laughter]
- That's fair.
459
00:14:58,139 --> 00:15:00,019
- Hey, no kids works for me.
460
00:15:00,039 --> 00:15:01,019
- Yes!
461
00:15:01,039 --> 00:15:02,019
- Very well.
462
00:15:02,039 --> 00:15:03,139
[neck cracks]
463
00:15:03,159 --> 00:15:04,139
- Wait!
464
00:15:04,159 --> 00:15:06,220
We didn't sing "Happy Birthday"
to our girl.
465
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:08,029
- Oh.
- Everybody?
466
00:15:08,049 --> 00:15:12,059
all: ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
467
00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:15,090
♪ Happy birthday-- ♪
- Oh!
468
00:15:15,110 --> 00:15:17,190
You don't sing
the Stevie version?
469
00:15:17,210 --> 00:15:19,100
[chuckling]
Oh...
470
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,139
Your wish is revoked!
471
00:15:21,159 --> 00:15:25,000
all: No!
[dramatic music]
472
00:15:25,019 --> 00:15:28,009
- No! This is your fault!
- Yeah. Good job, Tony.
473
00:15:28,029 --> 00:15:29,090
- You're the one
that made us start singing!
474
00:15:29,110 --> 00:15:31,090
- Now I have to keep my kids!
- Now she has to keep her kids!
475
00:15:31,110 --> 00:15:32,220
- Well, that's on you.
You shouldn't have had the kids.
476
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,009
- No, it's on you.
- No, it's on you.
477
00:15:34,029 --> 00:15:35,009
- Oh, it's on me?
- Yeah, it's on you.
478
00:15:35,029 --> 00:15:36,149
- I'm not the daddy
of them kids.
479
00:15:37,179 --> 00:15:39,179
[quirky upbeat music]
480
00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:42,110
- Man, this whole thing
fell apart.
481
00:15:42,129 --> 00:15:45,070
- I know.
I'm sad they're leaving, too.
482
00:15:45,090 --> 00:15:47,049
- I mean,
maybe we can fix this.
483
00:15:47,070 --> 00:15:49,019
- I don't think we can.
484
00:15:49,039 --> 00:15:52,019
Sometimes, you just gotta throw
the whole thing away.
485
00:15:52,039 --> 00:15:54,230
- You and I are
the reasonable ones.
486
00:15:55,009 --> 00:15:57,110
If you think about it,
Ashley's the one who created
487
00:15:57,129 --> 00:16:00,009
all this drama
with the whole president thing.
488
00:16:00,029 --> 00:16:02,220
♪ ♪
489
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,190
Ashley, you and I
are the reasonable ones.
490
00:16:05,210 --> 00:16:09,009
And really, Robin's the one
who created all this drama.
491
00:16:09,029 --> 00:16:10,190
You should do another one
of those smart speeches
492
00:16:10,210 --> 00:16:13,090
we all love
and get the crew back together.
493
00:16:13,110 --> 00:16:15,049
- [scoffs] I already tried
to educate these people.
494
00:16:15,070 --> 00:16:17,070
There's only such much
I can do.
495
00:16:17,090 --> 00:16:19,230
[sighs]
I didn't leave room for food.
496
00:16:20,009 --> 00:16:21,210
But I'm not leaving
Ta-Nehisi Coates behind.
497
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,149
The new world will have
critical race theory
498
00:16:23,169 --> 00:16:25,080
and beautiful prose.
499
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:28,090
- Girl, you can have books
and food if you stay.
500
00:16:28,110 --> 00:16:30,200
It'll be like one of those
cute, little cafés.
501
00:16:30,220 --> 00:16:32,049
Let's go talk to Gabrielle.
502
00:16:32,070 --> 00:16:34,080
You know she doesn't actually
want to be president.
503
00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:36,200
She's basically, like, allergic
to responsibility.
504
00:16:36,220 --> 00:16:37,210
Am I right?
505
00:16:37,230 --> 00:16:39,090
[soft dramatic music]
506
00:16:39,110 --> 00:16:42,230
Gabrielle, you're, like, the
most responsible person here.
507
00:16:43,009 --> 00:16:45,220
I mean, wine-based currency?
Genius.
508
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,230
You can totally be the one
to convince everyone
509
00:16:48,009 --> 00:16:50,169
that the smartest thing to do
is stay.
510
00:16:50,190 --> 00:16:51,179
- Huh.
511
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:52,179
I really should've learned
512
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:55,179
how to make wine
before the end of the world.
513
00:16:55,200 --> 00:17:00,059
Oh, well. I will just have
to carry as much as I can.
514
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,149
- Come on, do you really think
that's practical?
515
00:17:02,169 --> 00:17:04,190
You should absolutely just
stay here.
516
00:17:04,210 --> 00:17:07,180
- [chuckles]
Wow, wow.
517
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:10,089
I just keep having to save
y'all from y'all selves.
518
00:17:10,109 --> 00:17:11,190
[scoffs]
Her duplicitous ass
519
00:17:11,210 --> 00:17:13,190
has been doublespeaking
this whole time.
520
00:17:13,210 --> 00:17:16,140
Y'all don't hear that?
It's mad echoey in here.
521
00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:18,190
She lyin', lyin', lyin'.
522
00:17:18,210 --> 00:17:20,220
- Robin, just stop.
523
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:22,019
"Stop, stop, stop."
524
00:17:22,039 --> 00:17:23,180
- Ladies, enough!
525
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:27,069
It is far too early for us
to be losing our minds.
526
00:17:27,089 --> 00:17:29,210
We have to look out
for each other.
527
00:17:29,230 --> 00:17:32,109
We have to have
each other's backs.
528
00:17:32,130 --> 00:17:36,089
We're all we got.
It's just us.
529
00:17:36,109 --> 00:17:38,119
- Oh, word, Melania?
We stealing speeches now?
530
00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:41,190
I gave that exact,
same speech...
531
00:17:41,210 --> 00:17:43,230
in my dream.
532
00:17:44,009 --> 00:17:45,180
[quirky upbeat music]
533
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,009
[soft classical music]
534
00:17:48,029 --> 00:17:52,000
- Brandy sings first.
She brought the boy up.
535
00:17:52,019 --> 00:17:54,160
You don't do that
if you're the side chick.
536
00:17:54,180 --> 00:17:57,039
That's wifely positioning.
537
00:17:57,059 --> 00:17:58,220
The boy is indeed hers.
538
00:17:59,000 --> 00:17:59,230
[bell rings]
539
00:18:00,009 --> 00:18:02,140
- Brilliant final argument,
Phoebe.
540
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:04,029
Temi, your turn.
541
00:18:04,049 --> 00:18:08,130
- Monica also said,
"What we have, you can't take."
542
00:18:08,150 --> 00:18:11,009
Have, possession.
Nine-tenths of the law.
543
00:18:11,029 --> 00:18:12,009
It appears, then,
544
00:18:12,029 --> 00:18:14,160
that Monica was
in the possession of the boy
545
00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:16,089
at the time of recording.
546
00:18:16,109 --> 00:18:17,170
[bell rings]
- Mm!
547
00:18:17,190 --> 00:18:20,089
You've both made excellent
final arguments.
548
00:18:20,109 --> 00:18:24,130
But see, I'm still unsure
as to whom the boy belongs.
549
00:18:24,150 --> 00:18:26,190
And despite
my pending brunch plans,
550
00:18:26,210 --> 00:18:28,109
I also couldn't determine
a clear winner
551
00:18:28,130 --> 00:18:30,130
in our previous rounds, uh,
552
00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:32,170
sugar versus salt in grits,
553
00:18:32,190 --> 00:18:34,200
uh, Biggie versus Tupac,
554
00:18:34,220 --> 00:18:37,099
and Vicks Vapo-Rub versus
555
00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:39,059
all of Western medicine.
556
00:18:39,079 --> 00:18:43,190
So we're gonna move along
to the final tiebreaker round
557
00:18:43,210 --> 00:18:45,150
and you all will be taking on
558
00:18:45,170 --> 00:18:50,210
the greatest Black debate ever.
559
00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:53,009
- I've been waiting
my whole life for this.
560
00:18:53,029 --> 00:18:55,019
- We're coming for that W.
561
00:18:55,039 --> 00:18:56,130
- For this final round,
562
00:18:56,150 --> 00:18:59,130
there is only
one correct answer.
563
00:18:59,150 --> 00:19:02,000
And a reminder that my brunch
starts at 2:00.
564
00:19:02,019 --> 00:19:03,049
- That's just lunch.
565
00:19:03,069 --> 00:19:04,059
- Uh?
566
00:19:04,079 --> 00:19:05,210
Somebody don't want
a scholarship.
567
00:19:05,230 --> 00:19:07,190
[stifled laughter]
568
00:19:07,210 --> 00:19:09,000
Okay, ladies, please have
your representatives
569
00:19:09,019 --> 00:19:10,089
come to the podium.
570
00:19:10,109 --> 00:19:12,029
Okay, here we go.
571
00:19:12,049 --> 00:19:15,210
Actor Denzel Washington won an
Academy Award for Best Actor
572
00:19:15,230 --> 00:19:20,039
in 2001 for his role as
Detective Alonzo Harris
573
00:19:20,059 --> 00:19:22,220
in "Training Day," technically.
574
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:24,210
But we all know
that was an apology Oscar
575
00:19:24,230 --> 00:19:28,009
for all the times he didn't win
and he should have.
576
00:19:28,029 --> 00:19:32,130
Please make a case for the role
Denzel should've won for.
577
00:19:32,150 --> 00:19:33,130
- Oh, that's money!
578
00:19:33,150 --> 00:19:35,150
- And you can't say
"Malcolm X."
579
00:19:35,170 --> 00:19:36,220
- Wow.
580
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,069
My aunties just slap-boxed over
this very debate last week.
581
00:19:39,089 --> 00:19:42,019
- Miriam, you're first.
Go.
582
00:19:42,039 --> 00:19:43,019
- Cool.
583
00:19:43,039 --> 00:19:45,230
Y'all gonna love this.
Watch me work.
584
00:19:46,009 --> 00:19:47,190
Denzel Washington,
585
00:19:47,210 --> 00:19:50,109
legendary thespian
and king of Blacks,
586
00:19:50,130 --> 00:19:53,220
should've won the Oscar for...
[suspenseful energetic music]
587
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,130
Damn.
What's it called?
588
00:19:56,150 --> 00:19:57,140
Uh, you know it.
589
00:19:57,160 --> 00:19:59,019
What's the one where he's like,
really fine in?
590
00:19:59,039 --> 00:20:00,029
- All of them?
591
00:20:00,049 --> 00:20:02,049
- Yes, but he's fine
in the past in this one.
592
00:20:02,069 --> 00:20:03,089
You know, it's a period piece.
593
00:20:03,109 --> 00:20:04,220
He's serving that
mid-century drip.
594
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,049
- Oh, oh, "The Great Debaters."
- Hey!
595
00:20:07,069 --> 00:20:08,039
- She can't just call out.
596
00:20:08,059 --> 00:20:10,180
This is a debate,
not "Family Feud."
597
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:12,160
- If this is gonna get us
to a clear winner
598
00:20:12,180 --> 00:20:15,019
as soon as possible,
I'll allow it.
599
00:20:15,039 --> 00:20:16,190
- Okay, what's the one
with the racism?
600
00:20:16,210 --> 00:20:18,170
- Oh, um,
"Remember the Titans."
601
00:20:18,190 --> 00:20:21,029
- No, racism plus mustache.
602
00:20:21,049 --> 00:20:22,049
Come on.
You know it.
603
00:20:22,069 --> 00:20:23,069
Remember we watched it
at your house
604
00:20:23,089 --> 00:20:25,069
that time we had to babysit
your little cousin
605
00:20:25,089 --> 00:20:27,019
'cause her daddy was gonna
be home late from work
606
00:20:27,039 --> 00:20:28,119
and we was eating Bagel Bites
607
00:20:28,140 --> 00:20:30,150
and we was watching a movie and
I was watching and I was like,
608
00:20:30,170 --> 00:20:34,099
"Damn, Denzel look mad fine
in these post-war clothes."
609
00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:36,099
And you were like,
"Eh, I prefer modern."
610
00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:37,130
And I was like,
"[clicks tongue]
611
00:20:37,150 --> 00:20:39,099
He look fine no matter what."
Remember?
612
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:40,099
- You remember all that
613
00:20:40,119 --> 00:20:41,180
but you don't remember the name
of the movie?
614
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:43,230
- Oh!
"Devil in a Blue Dress!"
615
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:45,119
- "Devil in a Blue Dress."
616
00:20:45,140 --> 00:20:47,069
That's where I got
my suspenders fetish.
617
00:20:47,089 --> 00:20:48,140
[bell rings]
618
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,019
- [sighs]
Natalia, it's your turn.
619
00:20:50,039 --> 00:20:52,079
- It is of my opinion
that Mr. Denzel Washington,
620
00:20:52,099 --> 00:20:53,190
esteemed actor,
621
00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:54,230
should've won
for his performance
622
00:20:55,009 --> 00:20:56,230
in not "Malcolm X,"
but a different Spike Lee joint
623
00:20:57,009 --> 00:20:59,119
and it is called...
624
00:20:59,140 --> 00:21:01,099
[drumming on table]
Oh, my God.
625
00:21:01,119 --> 00:21:02,200
Damn, what is it called?
626
00:21:02,220 --> 00:21:04,000
- Uh, "Flight"?
627
00:21:04,019 --> 00:21:05,150
- No.
That's not it.
628
00:21:05,170 --> 00:21:08,000
- Uh, uh, "The Color Purple"?
- Hey, she's cheating!
629
00:21:08,019 --> 00:21:09,160
She has IMDb open!
630
00:21:09,180 --> 00:21:10,220
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
631
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,130
You have IMDb open
and you didn't even know
632
00:21:12,150 --> 00:21:14,190
Denzel is not in
"The Color Purple"?
633
00:21:14,210 --> 00:21:16,220
I should deduct a point
for that.
634
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:18,009
- [huffs]
635
00:21:18,029 --> 00:21:19,130
- Can we please move forward
636
00:21:19,150 --> 00:21:20,180
so I can give two of y'all
a scholarship
637
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:22,089
and get out of here?
638
00:21:22,109 --> 00:21:25,029
- Okay, Denzel Washington has
played many a character,
639
00:21:25,049 --> 00:21:27,079
but the role for which
he should've won an Oscar
640
00:21:27,099 --> 00:21:30,000
is one that we all
thoroughly enjoy.
641
00:21:30,019 --> 00:21:31,000
It is where he played
642
00:21:31,019 --> 00:21:33,140
a military man
who had immense rage
643
00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:36,140
and quiet sensitivity
all in one body!
644
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,130
- Ha!
645
00:21:38,150 --> 00:21:41,220
He already won
a supporting Oscar for "Glory."
646
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,099
Disqualified!
647
00:21:43,119 --> 00:21:45,079
- "The Equalizer."
648
00:21:45,099 --> 00:21:50,089
The Oscar should've gone
to Denzel for "The Equalizer."
649
00:21:50,109 --> 00:21:52,220
- An impressive argument,
650
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,029
and one with which
I can find no fault.
651
00:21:55,049 --> 00:21:56,029
- Ah!
652
00:21:56,049 --> 00:21:57,079
- Except for the fact that
653
00:21:57,099 --> 00:22:01,079
that film came out 13 years
after "Training Day."
654
00:22:01,099 --> 00:22:03,130
The correct answer
is the character
655
00:22:03,150 --> 00:22:09,039
of Detective John Hobbs
in the 1998 film, "Fallen."
656
00:22:09,059 --> 00:22:10,210
- Are you serious?
"Fallen"?
657
00:22:10,230 --> 00:22:12,000
- Aww.
658
00:22:12,019 --> 00:22:14,049
Oh, look at your fallen faces.
659
00:22:14,069 --> 00:22:16,099
That's what you get
for taking too long.
660
00:22:16,119 --> 00:22:18,059
I'm out!
661
00:22:18,079 --> 00:22:20,220
Only got paid $25 for this,
anyway.
662
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,069
Where's my mimosa?
663
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:28,099
[old-school hip-hop music]
664
00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:29,109
- Okay, see, see, look.
665
00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:31,019
I can pick any song
from my library
666
00:22:31,039 --> 00:22:32,190
and play it over
that wireless speaker system.
667
00:22:32,210 --> 00:22:35,170
- The government is using
Sonos speakers to spy on us!
668
00:22:35,190 --> 00:22:37,119
Look it up!
669
00:22:37,140 --> 00:22:39,059
[chuckles]
670
00:22:39,079 --> 00:22:40,119
♪ ♪
671
00:22:40,140 --> 00:22:42,019
- Ooh, girl!
672
00:22:42,039 --> 00:22:43,140
Why you look so tired?
You sick?
673
00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:45,039
What you got, that, uh,
global warming?
674
00:22:45,059 --> 00:22:46,210
- I'm not about to do this
with you today, Ma.
675
00:22:46,230 --> 00:22:49,170
- When you gonna stop playing
around with that natural stuff
676
00:22:49,190 --> 00:22:52,029
and get yourself a perm like
you've got some sense?
677
00:22:52,049 --> 00:22:55,029
- When you get some hair that
don't come with tags, Aunt Bev.
678
00:22:55,049 --> 00:22:56,220
- Ooh, you gain weight?
You look fat.
679
00:22:57,009 --> 00:22:59,039
- You're losing weight!
You're wasting away!
680
00:22:59,059 --> 00:23:00,150
- Well, I think
you look amazing, babe.
681
00:23:00,170 --> 00:23:01,230
- Who asked you?
682
00:23:02,009 --> 00:23:03,109
If she look so amazing,
why don't you marry her?
683
00:23:03,130 --> 00:23:06,089
You been shacking up with
my daughter for five years.
684
00:23:06,109 --> 00:23:09,079
[Bell Big DeVoe's "Poison"
starts playing]
685
00:23:09,099 --> 00:23:11,190
♪ ♪
686
00:23:12,019 --> 00:23:13,029
- Oh, I'm sorry, y'all.
687
00:23:13,049 --> 00:23:14,170
I'm still trying to work
this sound system.
688
00:23:14,190 --> 00:23:16,150
- Ooh, you know I love me
some "Poison."
689
00:23:16,170 --> 00:23:19,210
- Michael Bivins finger-popped
me at the Food Mart
690
00:23:19,230 --> 00:23:22,140
back in '89,
so you know I got to dance
691
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:24,039
whenever I hear "Poison."
692
00:23:24,059 --> 00:23:26,180
- Watch out now, Grandma Ruby!
Looking good!
693
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,150
- Are you still going
to that non-denominational,
694
00:23:29,170 --> 00:23:32,180
service-is-only-two-hours,
come-as-you-are church?
695
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:33,190
- No.
696
00:23:33,210 --> 00:23:34,200
- I can tell you weren't
covered by the blood.
697
00:23:34,220 --> 00:23:36,019
Didn't even cover your neck.
698
00:23:36,039 --> 00:23:38,089
Out here dressed like
the Devil's mistress.
699
00:23:38,109 --> 00:23:39,170
- [claps]
You know what--
700
00:23:39,190 --> 00:23:41,210
[Bell Big DeVoe's "Poison"
starts playing]
701
00:23:41,230 --> 00:23:44,000
♪ ♪
702
00:23:44,019 --> 00:23:47,200
- ♪ Girl, I must warn you ♪
703
00:23:47,220 --> 00:23:49,079
♪ I sense
something stra-- ♪
704
00:23:49,099 --> 00:23:50,200
- Whoo-hoo!
Y'all better stop it.
705
00:23:50,220 --> 00:23:52,039
Just stop it!
706
00:23:52,059 --> 00:23:55,190
This song got me out here
acting all worldly and whatnot.
707
00:23:55,210 --> 00:23:57,089
You know I'm celibate!
708
00:23:57,109 --> 00:23:59,000
Can't let the government
get my DNA.
709
00:23:59,019 --> 00:24:01,069
- Hey, yo, Detric!
Good to see you!
710
00:24:01,089 --> 00:24:02,059
- Oh, what's up?
711
00:24:02,079 --> 00:24:03,150
- I didn't think you was gonna
make it.
712
00:24:03,170 --> 00:24:04,150
- Oh, word?
- Yeah.
713
00:24:04,170 --> 00:24:05,190
- What you say that for?
714
00:24:05,210 --> 00:24:07,109
- 'Cause the last time
I seen him,
715
00:24:07,130 --> 00:24:08,200
he was with this bad shorty
716
00:24:08,220 --> 00:24:10,170
at PF Chang's happy hour
last week.
717
00:24:10,190 --> 00:24:13,019
I mean,
shorty was stacked like Legos!
718
00:24:13,039 --> 00:24:14,230
Shorty was thicker
than frozen grits!
719
00:24:15,009 --> 00:24:17,130
God damn, my nigga!
Yeah!
720
00:24:17,150 --> 00:24:20,230
- I'm sorry.
What shorty?
721
00:24:21,009 --> 00:24:23,000
[Bell Big DeVoe's "Poison"
starts playing]
722
00:24:23,019 --> 00:24:24,089
♪ ♪
723
00:24:24,109 --> 00:24:27,009
Stop, Detric!
What shorty?
724
00:24:27,029 --> 00:24:29,170
- Ooh, boy, you are in trouble.
725
00:24:29,190 --> 00:24:31,059
[Bell Big DeVoe's "Poison"
starts playing]
726
00:24:31,079 --> 00:24:34,019
[both grunting]
727
00:24:34,039 --> 00:24:36,099
♪ ♪
728
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,130
- Stop, boy.
- We know what you doin'!
729
00:24:38,150 --> 00:24:39,200
- Quit playing the beginning
of "Poison"
730
00:24:39,220 --> 00:24:42,000
and answer my question, negro!
- Fine.
731
00:24:42,019 --> 00:24:43,109
I'll answer your question
when you explain to me
732
00:24:43,130 --> 00:24:45,200
why I found a lease agreement
in your purse last week!
733
00:24:45,220 --> 00:24:47,230
When were you gonna tell me
you were moving out?
734
00:24:48,009 --> 00:24:49,039
- Huh?
What?
735
00:24:49,059 --> 00:24:51,109
[Bell Big DeVoe's "Poison"
starts playing]
736
00:24:51,130 --> 00:24:55,130
♪ ♪
737
00:24:55,150 --> 00:24:57,160
- Y'all play too much!
- I never liked him!
738
00:24:57,180 --> 00:25:00,000
- I'll whoop all
of y'all's asses!
739
00:25:00,019 --> 00:25:02,049
[Frankie Beverly & Maze's
"Before I Let Go"]
740
00:25:02,069 --> 00:25:03,150
[cheers]
741
00:25:03,170 --> 00:25:04,220
That's good, damn.
742
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:08,049
♪ ♪
743
00:25:08,069 --> 00:25:11,029
- That's right, y'all!
One, two! Whoo!
744
00:25:11,049 --> 00:25:12,029
- Whoo!
745
00:25:12,049 --> 00:25:13,150
♪ ♪
746
00:25:13,170 --> 00:25:14,150
- Whoo!
747
00:25:14,170 --> 00:25:16,220
♪ ♪
748
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,220
[cheering]
749
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:24,130
♪ ♪
750
00:25:24,150 --> 00:25:25,170
- Ha!
751
00:25:25,190 --> 00:25:27,180
You know, it used to be
called Uncle Wendell and Maze,
752
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:29,059
but I realized there
was more money
753
00:25:29,079 --> 00:25:32,059
in aluminum siding.
[chuckles]
754
00:25:32,079 --> 00:25:34,109
- ♪ You made me happy ♪
755
00:25:34,130 --> 00:25:36,150
[cheering]
756
00:25:36,170 --> 00:25:37,230
- That's it!
Yeah!
757
00:25:38,009 --> 00:25:39,119
- ♪ This you can bet ♪
758
00:25:39,140 --> 00:25:41,130
♪ ♪
759
00:25:41,150 --> 00:25:44,109
♪ You stood right beside me ♪
760
00:25:45,049 --> 00:25:47,190
- What the fuck, Skye?
How did you know I said that?
761
00:25:47,210 --> 00:25:49,180
- I didn't!
Those were my words.
762
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:50,230
My original words.
763
00:25:51,009 --> 00:25:52,069
- They were good words.
764
00:25:52,089 --> 00:25:54,170
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
This is nuts.
765
00:25:56,230 --> 00:25:59,039
- I can't let her go out there
by herself.
766
00:25:59,059 --> 00:26:01,190
Uh, I'll miss you all.
767
00:26:01,210 --> 00:26:04,200
- [groans]
I'll miss you guys, too.
768
00:26:04,220 --> 00:26:05,210
[clicks tongue]
769
00:26:05,230 --> 00:26:08,180
- Oh, man.
That sounds tough.
770
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,210
Is that tough for you guys?
771
00:26:10,230 --> 00:26:15,059
- Man, I'm so not ready
to lose y'all.
772
00:26:15,079 --> 00:26:17,230
- ♪ This song's dedicated ♪
773
00:26:18,009 --> 00:26:20,160
♪ To my homies ♪
774
00:26:20,180 --> 00:26:23,220
♪ In that gangsta lean ♪
775
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:27,130
all: ♪ Why'd you have to go ♪
776
00:26:27,150 --> 00:26:30,200
♪ So soon? ♪
777
00:26:30,220 --> 00:26:34,079
- ♪ It seems like yesterday ♪
778
00:26:34,099 --> 00:26:36,049
♪ We were hanging... ♪
779
00:26:36,069 --> 00:26:38,170
all: ♪ 'Round the hood ♪
780
00:26:38,190 --> 00:26:41,059
♪ Now I'm-- ♪
[laptop startup chime]
781
00:26:42,069 --> 00:26:44,160
- What the shit?
782
00:26:44,180 --> 00:26:46,160
[gasps]
783
00:26:46,180 --> 00:26:49,000
[ominous music]
784
00:26:49,019 --> 00:26:56,019
♪ ♪
785
00:26:58,049 --> 00:27:00,150
Oh, God!
786
00:27:00,170 --> 00:27:03,200
Somebody's fuckin' watching us!
787
00:27:05,019 --> 00:27:07,049
And why's Ashley
subject number one?
788
00:27:08,069 --> 00:27:11,049
[upbeat music]
789
00:27:11,069 --> 00:27:18,059
♪ ♪
790
00:28:08,059 --> 00:28:10,109
- I have thought about joining
OnlyFans, uh,
791
00:28:10,130 --> 00:28:11,089
but not to get naked.
792
00:28:11,109 --> 00:28:13,009
Just to read...scriptures.
793
00:28:13,029 --> 00:28:14,210
- Were you inspired by Omarion?
794
00:28:14,230 --> 00:28:16,069
Do you go,
"[inhales through teeth] Ahh!"
795
00:28:16,089 --> 00:28:17,130
when you get braided?
796
00:28:29,150 --> 00:28:31,150
[bright tone]
797
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:35,750
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