All language subtitles for The More The Merrier (1943) Orig. -engl-

Our vagabond camera takes us
to beautiful Washington D.C.,

the national capital
of our United States,

situated on the broad banks
of the Potomac River.

Living is pleasant
and leisurely.

For it is a city of
formality and custom.

Manners and courtesy

are responsible for
the well-ordered conduct

of its daily affairs.

The many fine restaurants
of Washington

are the delight of
the epicurean and the gourmet,

where one may enjoy to the full

the rare dishes
of the old South.

Washington's beautiful homes

have the quiet dignity
of another day.

Our trip would be incomplete

if we neglected to visit
the quiet, staid,

and dignified
residential section.

It is with pride that we view
hospitable Washington,

friendly Washington,

welcoming us to her doorstep,

eagerly throwing wide her doors.

I'm sorry,
there are no vacancies.

Positively no vacancies.

I have a reservation.

Oh, well, pardon me.
Uh, what was the name, sir?

Benjamin Dingle.

Senator Noonan
made the reservation.

Well, just a moment,
Mr. Dingle.

Oh, yes, we have
the reservation.

Good.

Senator Noonan engaged
a suite beginning the 24th.

This is only the 22nd.
You're two days early.

Anything wrong with
being two days early?

Why no, sir.

Everybody ought
to be two days early.

When this nation gets two days
early, we'll be getting somewhere.

Yes, sir, but unfortunately,

this suite won't be vacated
until day after tomorrow.

Can you connect me
with Senator Noonan?

The senator is out of town.

When will he be back?

Well, he was due back, uh,

day before yesterday,

but he's... He's, uh...

Two days late.

Yes, sir.

Well, when Senator Noonan
gets back late,

tell him I was here early.

Yes, sir.

Are all you people here
in answer to the ad

in the paper
about the apartment?

Sure, I am, sir.

I'll take it.

I'm sorry, but the apartment
is all rented.

What do you mean, rented?

Why, it isn't 5:00 yet.

I'm very sorry,

but the apartment is all rented.

If there should be another
vacancy, there'll be another ad.

May I ask

why you put us to the bother
of coming here?

No, you may not.

Well, good day.

You know what
Admiral Farragut said:

"Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead.

"Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead.

"Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead."

How do you do?
How do you do?

I'm Benjamin Dingle.

You certainly are.
I'm about the apartment.

I'm sorry,
I've already rented it.

Just a moment, young lady.
Do you think you know me

well enough to lie to me?
Yes.

Even so, you shouldn't
do it. Do you realize

that practically most of
the trouble in the world

comes from people
lying to people.

Just take Hitler
for instance. He's the...

I'm sorry, mister,
but I'd prefer...

Mr. Dingle.

Mr. Dingle, I'd prefer sharing
my apartment with a lady.

That's fine, so would I.
Um,

I'm sure you'll be happier
some place else.

I've been there.

Now look, please, we've...

Think of my position.
I can't go around

just renting my apartment
to anybody.

I'm not just anybody.
Besides, I'm only doing it

due to the housing
congestion in Washington.

You said it.

I... I think it's my patriotic
duty to take somebody in,

because everything is
so overcrowded.

I'm overcrowded.

Why don't you go to the YMCA?

I'm too old.

- Or the... The veteran's home.
- Too young.

Well, I don't know
what to sugg...

Sooner or later, I'm gonna
rent half of this apartment.

Suppose I have a look at it, eh?

Say, you're pretty sure
of yourself, aren't you?

Once upon a time.

I... Really, you wouldn't
be happy here at all.

Home is where you hang your hat.

This way?

Now, listen...
Just looking,

just looking.

It's no use, your looking,

because I've made up my mind
to rent to nobody but a woman.

Let me ask you something.

Would I ever want to
wear your stockings?

No.

All right.

Would I ever want
to borrow your girdle

or your red and yellow
dancing slippers?

Of course not.

Any woman, no matter who,
would insist upon borrowing

that dress you've got on
right now. You know why?

Because it's so pretty.

I made it myself.

Then how would you like it if she
spilled a cocktail all over it

at a party you couldn't go
with her to,

because she'd borrowed it
to go to it in?

She might have something
that I could wear.

Not her.
Why not?

Because she's so dumpy looking.

Never has anything clean.

That's why she's always
borrowing your dresses.

How do I know
you'd be any better?

Well, look at me.

I'm neat, like a pin.

Ah, let me stay.

Well, look, I can't...
I'll tell you what.

We'll try it out for a week.

End of the week comes,
if you're not happy,

we'll flip a coin
to see who moves out.

Who is it?
Me, of course.

Come in, of course.

Here's your copy of the...

Here's a copy of
the morning schedule.

Huh?
The morning schedule.

Oh, the morning schedule.

Yes, it's a matter
of efficiency.

You just follow this, and
we won't have any trouble.

Here, I'll show you.

You see this is the floor plan
of the apartment.

Here's, uh, my room,
here's your room,

here's the bathroom,
and here's the kitchen.

Now, my alarm goes off
at 7:00, and we both get up.

And at 7:01,
I enter the bathroom.

Then you go down to get the milk

and, by 7:05,
you've started the coffee.

One minute later,
I leave the bathroom,

and a minute after that,
you enter the bathroom.

Now, that's when
I'm starting to dress.

Three minutes later,
I am having my coffee

and, a minute
after that, at 7:12,

you leave the bathroom.

At 7:13, I put on my eggs,

and I leave to finish dressing.

Then, you put on your shoes
and take off my eggs at 7:16.

At 7:17, you start to shave.

At 7:18, I eat my eggs

and, at 7:21, I'm in the
bathroom, fixing my hair

and, at 7:24, you're in the
kitchen, putting on your eggs.

At 7:25, you make your bed.

7:26, I make my bed.

Then, while you're
eating your eggs,

I take out the papers and cans.

At 7:29,
you're washing the dishes

and, at 7:30,
we're all finished.

You see?

It's really very simple.

Do we do all this railroad
time or eastern war time?

When you hear my alarm go
off, you'll know it's 7:00.

You're a very systematic
girl, aren't you?

I used to work in the Office
of Facts and Figures.

Good night.

Miss Milligan.
By the way,

why aren't you married,
Miss Milligan?

Well, really!

Some high type, clean-cut,
nice, young fellow.

If you don't mind,
Mr. Dingle.

Of course, there's not
many men about nowadays,

but there's always one
if you're out to get one.

Maybe I don't want
to get married.

Well, don't you?

Well...
Or maybe you do.

Well...
Come, come, Miss Milligan.

Make up your mind.
Make up my mind?

You know, "Damn the
torpedoes, full steam ahead!"

That's what
Admiral Farragut said.

Of all times, Miss Milligan,

this is no time
to be indecisive, in.

If you expect to get along here, Mr.
Dingle,

you'll have to learn to
mind your own business.

In these days, Miss Milligan, everybody's
business is everybody's business.

War brings people
closer together, you know.

Not you and me,
Mr. Dingle. Good night.

Mind your own business.

Who was in his own room minding
his own business when who else

but you, of course, came in?
One more thing.

Uh, we'd better not leave the
apartment together in the morning.

You mean, because
people might think?

Well, not exactly.
But people are so...

Me?
Of course.

Thank you, Miss Milligan.

I thank you indeed.

Good night.
Good night.

♪ Jimmy Doolittle
flew over the seas

♪ He wanted a nip
at the Nipponese

♪ Cleared a cloud
and looked below

♪ Said, by golly,
there's Tok-y-o

♪ Oh, Jimmy Doolittle

♪ He understood

♪ He do-ed his duty

♪ And he do-ed it good ♪ Somewhere
Jimmy had heard it said

♪ Somewhere Jimmy
had heard it said

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full steam ahead

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full steam ahead

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full steam ahead

Mr. Dingle?

Mr. Dingle?

Yes, Miss Milligan?

Do you smoke in bed?

No, I sleep in bed.

Do I smell smoke?

Only the smoke of burning
memories, Miss Milligan,

rising from the smoldering
embers of my romantic youth.

Do you keep a diary,
Miss Milligan?

No, I don't.
Of course not.

Why do you ask?

There are two kinds of people.

Those who don't do
what they want to do,

so they write down in a diary
about what they haven't done.

And those who are too busy to write
about it because they're out doing it.

♪ Full steam ahead

Hello?

Hello, oh.

Good morning.

You've got a terrible disposition
in the morning, haven't you?

Good morning.

No.

No, what?

Bring in the milk.

Good morning.

What are you doing
out there? Come in.

The paper!
Oh, the paper.

Oh, my mistake.
The paper.

Miss Milligan.

Miss Milligan.

Miss Milligan.

It's me, Mr. Dingle.
You locked me out.

Paper.

Coffee.

All right. Mr. Dingle.

Mr. Dingle,
do you have the coffee?

Oh, the coffee.
Yes, yes, coming. Coffee.

Right along.
Coming right along.

"Damn the torpedoes,
full steam ahead."

Coffee, coffee. Coffee.

There we are.
Merci.

There's a war going on,
Miss Milligan.

Get dressed, Mr. Dingle.
Stick to the schedule.

Oh, yes get dressed,
Mr. Dingle.

Get dressed, Mr. Dingle.

Get dressed.

Mr. Dingle?

Yes, Miss Milligan?

Don't forget to make your bed.

Oh, yes. Make the bed,
make the bed.

Make the bed, make the bed.

Make the bed, oh, yes.

Make the bed.

Make the bed.

Where are the pants?

Where are my pants?

Where are those pants?

Um, Mr. Dingle,

it's 7:30.

Bathroom.

If you're going downtown
this morning,

meet me downstairs
at 7:32.

I share a ride with
Miss Hopkins at 7:32.

We mustn't keep her waiting,

because at 7:34,
we pick up Miss Ledbetter.

Then at 7:37, we pick up Miss
Taylor and Miss Johannes.

Oh, my lunch.

Mr. Dingle.

Yes, Miss Milligan.

Do you care to ride?

Well, I have plenty of time.

If you don't mind,

I think I'll just roll downtown.

Well, have it your own way.

Good morning.

♪ He scooped out a turnip
to make him a one

Are you here
about the apartment?

You look like a high type,
clean-cut, nice, young fella.

No, it's not rented, come in.

It's really only half
of half of an apartment,

but it's not rented.
Good.

What's your name?

Carter.

Bill Carter?
Joe Carter.

I used to know a fellow
named Bill Carter.

It wasn't me.

Don't you suppose I know that?

What did you ask for, then?

I guess I know what
Bill Carter looked like.

Not like me.

Oh, then you know Bill Carter?

No, I don't,

but he sounds like a great guy.

In here.

Hmm, who's in here with me?

Me.

How much?
Well,

half of mine.
Six dollars a week.

I'll take it.

About time
you made up your mind.

Five, six.

How long you going
to be in town?

Only a week.

That's too bad.
Why?

Eight girls to every fella.

So they say.
So it is.

How long you been here?
Hmm, not long.

What do you do?

I'm a well-to-do
retired millionaire.

How about you?
Same.

Say, what's that?
A part of an airplane?

A new type of garden bench.

It looks like a propeller.

It does?

What brought you here,
Mr. Carter?

- Railroad.
- No, I mean, what's your job?

I'm a mechanic.
I work in a baby carriage factory.

Where?

California.
San Francisco?

Burbank.

Baby carriage factory, eh?

Yep.

Tokyo baby carriage corporation.

Plain and fancy baby carriages
for carrying babies to Tokyo.

Maybe you think this is
none of my business.

Maybe I do.

Probably your name
isn't even Bill Carter.

Probably not.
It's probably Joe Carter.

Well, I'll take this one.

Have you
an alarm clock?

Yeah, how about a key?
Key?

Thanks.

Good night, kids.

Hello, Milligan.

I'm Dingle.

Hello, excuse me.

Come in.

Only one "L" in Dingle.

You must have been shopping.

Let me help you.

Thank you.

There you are, Miss Milligan.

Miss Milligan, I've got
something to tell you.

Mr. Dingle, I've been thinking
about it a great deal today.

And I don't know
how you'll take it.

It just won't work, that's all.

You'll have to give up
your half of the apartment.

What's that?
I can't have a man here.

Well, as a matter of fact...
Now, I'm sorry,

but I've made up my mind.
Now, listen to me.

You have to leave,
first thing in the morning.

Say, what's the matter
with you, anyway?

Nothing. I... I guess I'm
just a bit jumpy, that's all.

Well, just calm down.
You're making me jumpy, too.

It's all right.
It's nothing at all.

Sorry.

Hey.

Come here a minute.

What's the matter, Milligan?

Dingle.

Now listen, Bill...
Joe.

Listen, Joe.
Yeah?

I've got something
I've got to ask you.

What?

Well, you might think it
a bit personal.

Well, that's all right.

Never mind. I'll tell you
later, it's all right.

It's all right.
I'll tell you later.

Mr. Dingle?

Yes?

Did I leave my comb in there?

No.

Oh! Never mind.

Hey, did you say something?

Water.

Yes?

Oh, I thought you'd finished.

Be through in a minute.
No hurry.

Just a minute.

That's all right.
No hurry.

All right?
All right.

How did they get here?

Bill.

Bill.

You, uh,

looking for someone?

Who are you?

How did you get in here?

Well, I live here.

Since when?

Since this morning.

You don't by any chance
happen to know a gentleman

by the name of Mr.
Benjamin Dingle, do you?

Meaning me, Miss Milligan?

Yes, I mean you.

What do you have
to say for yourself?

Have you met my friend,
Joe Carter?

I just met Joe Carter.

Oh, fine fella.

Mr. Dingle, answer me this,

who was it located and
leased this apartment?

Who was it made the... The
landlord repaper and repaint it?

Who was it bought
furniture and drapes,

and made rag rugs, and who
considers this apartment her home?

You. All right then,
answer me this,

who was it allowed you to
sublet half of her apartment

against her better judgment?
You.

Then why do you go
behind my back

and rent my apartment
to this... This... Him?

But I only rented
half of my half.

Otherwise, my friend Joe here would
have had to sleep in the park.

Otherwise, your friend Joe here is gonna
woulda have to sleep in the park anyway.

And you, too. Now out.
Out. Both of you.

Wait a minute. I'm paid up for the week.
I gave him six bucks.

Well, give him
back his six bucks!

Well, I had to send
some telegrams, and...

And I'm not going to move
till I get my six bucks.

Give him a check.

No checks.

Now, look here. I don't
owe you the six bucks.

He owes you the six bucks.

Now, listen, Miss Milligan.

I paid you $12
for a week's rent,

and I've only been here
one night.

Now you give me
back the difference,

and I'll have the money
to pay him with.

That solves it.

Yes.

Only,

well, I bought a hat.

You bought a hat.
Where's my money?

In her hat.

It is not. It's in his pocket,
only he hasn't got it.

Say, what do you
think you're doing?

Just looking at the hat.

It's pretty, isn't it?
You've got a nerve.

It looks pretty on her,
too, doesn't it?

Oh, it does not. That isn't
even the way it goes on.

Now, where were we?

Looking for my six bucks.

Well, I told you that I...

Now, look. You don't
think that I'm gonna...

All right. Stay.

But just one week.
Remember.

Come on, I'll show
you the schedule.

What schedule?

For the steeplechase
in the morning.

Bill. Bill.

Huh? Oh. Joe.

7:00, Joe.

Get up, get up.

Oh! Thanks. Hello, Milligan.
Dingle.

Oh, Dingle.
Get the schedule, Joe.

Schedule, schedule,
schedule, where is it?

Here it is.
Schedule.

Ah, we're right on time.

One, two, three, go.

Good morning.

Good morning.

What's for breakfast?

You've had your breakfast.

When?
7:07 a.m.

I guess we're
kinda off schedule.

What are you gawking at?

You. You look nice.

I hope I haven't upset
your routine here.

Just stick to the schedule.
That's all I ask.

It's rather nice having
a high type, clean-cut,

nice, young fellow at the table.

Better than nobody.

I'm used to nobody.

You ought to have
some high times here, Joe.

Young fellows don't come a
dime a dozen in Washington.

Eight girls to every fella.

Yeah, only I haven't
got time for that.

I'm only gonna be in
Washington only a week.

Where're you going to?
Where you came from?

Where they send me.

Who's they?

The Government.

Too bad you're not going
to be here regular.

One less fella for the
girls to look at.

Like I told you, eight girls...

Yeah, well, you're wasting
your conversation.

I'm not interested.

Yes, but the girls are,
eh, Miss Milligan?

Those that haven't any
men friends are, I suppose,

but in the case of a girl
who's engaged to be married...

Engaged? You?

Mr. Pendergast and I expect to be
married in the very near future.

Pendergast?

Charles J. Pendergast.

Who's he?

Hasn't he got something to
do with the housing plan?

He most certainly has.
He just happens to be

the Assistant Regional Coordinator
of O.P.L., that's all.

Is that good or bad?

Eighty-six hundred
dollars a year.

That's good.

Furthermore,
he's the youngest man ever

to occupy the position of
Regional Coordinator of O.P.L.

How old is he?

Only 42.

Forty-two?
Only 42.

Forty-two is a very safe,
sane age.

When a man has reached 42,
he knows something.

Like Mr. Pendergast.
He's an important man.

How long you been engaged?

Two years, I bet.

Twenty-two months.

That's a long time for
a girl to stick to one guy.

That depends on whether

she's engaged to be
married or just engaged.

Why'd you wait so long?

Mr. Pendergast and I felt it
would be an unwise step to take

in these times, with world
conditions so unsettled.

World conditions are so
unsettled, Miss Milligan,

because people
won't settle on things.

They ought to stop
pondering and push ahead.

"Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead."

That's what
Admiral Farragut said.

Yeah, that was in mobile bay.

You said that yesterday,
Mr. Dingle.

And I meant it yesterday,
Miss Milligan.

Mr. Pendergast and I
don't need your advice.

What'd you say
his first name was?

Charles J.

Well, don't you ever
call him by it?

Like Charlie or Chuck
or something?

Call Mr. Pendergast
"Charlie"?

Sure, why not?

Of course, you don't realize that Mr.
Pendergast is the type man

who has twice been to the
White House to dinner.

Worst food in Washington.

With the President?

Yes.

I'll bet the President's wife calls
him by his first name sometimes.

You...

...look messy.

Don't you ever brush your hair?

I suppose Mr. Pendergast combs
his hair every hour on the hour.

Mr. Pendergast has no hair.

This project
illustrates my point.

If the employees are housed near
the plants in which they work,

a full working day
can be saved each week.

Yes, he's right.

Time is the one thing
we cannot manufacture,

but we can make speed.

That's true.

And if this committee
will cut all the red tape

and give me permission
to go ahead,

I'll get things done.

That's the spirit.

That's the spirit.

Senator Noonan.

What is it?

What Mr. Dingle proposes
is impossible.

There are
contractual obligations

that have to be cleared up.

Then let whoever has to clear
them up, clear them up

while we're clearing up the ground around
those defense plants for buildings.

We must do away with
all forms and obligations.

Cut out all the red tape!
"Full speed ahead!"

That's the spirit.

I'd like to call to
Mr. Dingle's attention,

that article 847532

states that the laws
of a community

must regulate the construction
in that community.

Now, that's a fact in
Pennsylvania and New Jersey.

You said you represent
the O.P.L., didn't you?

Precisely.

I didn't catch your name.

Pendergast.

Not Charles J. Pendergast?

That's correct.

By golly,
I should have known it.

"I'm out to get the leopard
lady single-handed."

"Bang!
The door opens."

"Face to face with
the leopard lady, herself."

"You have arrived as I expected, Mr.
Tracy.

"Now, I will make
a bargain with you."

"What fiendish plan
have you now?"

"With the death ray ours,

"we can conquer
and rule the world.

"You and I, Dick Tracy."

"Count me out of your plan,
leopard lady,

"for I mean
to bring you to justice."

"Have you forgotten that
I have the death ray?"

"But without my help,
it is powerless."

"Perhaps some boiling oil
on your back

"will persuade you
to help me."

Gosh! That Dick Tracy is
sure playing with dynamite.

Sure is.

Is that the best you
can do with your time?

Gotta keep up
with what's going on.

I missed two Sundays
with Superman once,

and I've never felt right since.

It seems to me you might read
something more beneficial.

Like what?

Like the editorials, for
instance, or the columns.

All well-informed people
read the columnists.

Such as Mr. Pendergast,
I suppose.

You're right, I suppose.

Mr. Pendergast always
reads the columnists.

Are they funny?

Sometimes, but no pictures.

Oh, darn!

Hand me that section, will you?

I want to see if anyone I
know is being born today.

Hey, listen to this.

Born, today, to Mr. and Mrs.
Charles J. Pendergast, a son.

Mrs. Pendergast, the
former Constance Milligan,

is doing nicely.

Mr. Pendergast
is doing all right, too.

He gets $8,600 a year.

The baby arrived three minutes
ahead of schedule,

so Mr. Pendergast
refused delivery.

Funny.

Very, very funny.

Here, I'll help you.

This conversation
is much too witty for me,

so, if you don't mind, I'll
just leave you two up here

to laugh at each other's jokes.

What did I say?

Any minute now, you might
say something so funny

I might laugh myself to death.

Well, I never said a thing.

Maybe I said something.

If you aren't too weak
from laughing,

you might bring these things
with you when you come down.

What's she mad about?

Because you and the man
she's engaged to

are not anything alike,
and he oughta be.

You were right, Mr. Dingle.

A diary.

Hey, I wouldn't fool
with that if I were you.

Say, she's not mad with you.

She likes you.

You're nuts.

Says you're dumb, but cute.

She's no bargain herself.

Well, smart enough
to get you going.

I don't even know she's alive.

How come, then,

last night you said her name
in your sleep?

I did not.

I did?

Take my word.

Well, a guy's apt
to say anything in his sleep.

Maybe I was hollering at her.

No, you were cooing.
Like this.

Connie!

Ah, you make me sick.

Connie!

All right, all right.

Hey, she says you're good company
and nice to have around.

No fooling, boy. I'd put
that away if I were you.

She says you've turned out to be

a high type, clean-cut,
nice, young fella.

She does?

She says that...

Found your diary kicking about.

You ought to be careful,
Miss Milligan.

You never know what kind of
people are hanging around.

I told you, you shouldn't
have done that.

Now what're you going to do?

Going to find out
what she's going to do.

You'd better go in
and square yourself.

Go ahead. You remember that
stuff about the torpedoes.

Miss Milligan.

Connie!

Connie.

I brought your things down.

That was
a miserable thing to do.

If there's anything
that's cheap and... And...

Contemptible.

And contemptible,

it's being caught reading
somebody else's diary.

If I caught anyone reading my...

And you had to read it
in front of him.

Connie, I was hardly listening.

There are some things that are private, Mr.
Dingle, and...

And when people
go poking their nose in,

it's just too much, that's all.

And you have a very
long nose, Mr. Dingle.

I've tried to put up with you,
but you've been nothing...

Doing nothing but pry and meddle
ever since you've been here.

So, you just better go
pack up your things,

and when I get home
from work tomorrow night,

you'd better be moved
out, once and for all.

The both of you!

Oh, it's you.

I thought the arrangements
were that you...

Yeah, yeah, well, I didn't have
time to pack this morning.

I had to go get my orders,
so I came back to pack now.

As long as I'm here,

I might as well give you this.

"Miss Milligan,
I have moved out,

"but I wish to exonerate
Joseph Carter,

"my former roommate
in the south-half of 2B,

"of all implications
of responsibility

"in being caught
reading your diary.

"The fault is entirely mine,

"and Joseph Carter even
protested my disgraceful action

"as follows: 'Oh I would not
do that if I were you.'

"And wouldn't, either, because he's
such a high type, clean-cut, nice..."

Yeah, yeah, well,
you can skip all that.

"I am, etc., etc.,

"Benjamin Dingle."

I'd like that for my files.

What's the fixed-up
a... alibi for?

What, are you kidding? Does
this sound like me or Dingle?

Well, how do I know
you didn't write it?

You don't.

Well, if he wrote it, how
do I know it's the truth?

You don't.
Only, it's the truth.

Well, I don't know
what to believe.

Yeah, well,
I'm moving out anyway, so...

Just to show you
there's no hard feelings,

I'd like to give you this.

But why?

Peace offering.

Oh, you didn't have to do that.

Oh, it's nothing much,
just a sort of

genuine top-grain,
cowhide traveling bag

with all accessories.

This gadget drops down.

Oh, isn't that lovely?

Yeah, all these things
that fit it in here.

Here you have...

A mask.

I guess you'd know.

Well, I don't know
what that's for.

Oh, look.

Then it has the, uh,
double locks.

Here.

Oh, it smells so good.

Oh, be careful.

No, no. No, no,
you can't hurt.

Are you sure?

Sure. It has the special 18 inch
hinge, the man said, built in.

Here's all the different things
here you can do with it.

Double lock.

This is for magazines
and things, you see.

Yeah.
Oh.

Smell!

Isn't that lovely?

Oh, I... I couldn't take it.

Mr. Pendergast would object.

And he'd have
a perfect right to.

Just call it a wedding present

and take it on your honeymoon.

Oh, I... I couldn't take

one man's bag
on another man's honeymoon.

Well, just keep it at home then.

Look I got your initial put on it.
"C" for Constance.

You shouldn't have done that.

Well, I didn't. "C"
stands for "Carter," too.

I really bought it for myself,

but the Government won't let
me take it where I'm going,

so you might as well keep it.

Silly!

Look, Connie,

I want to give it to you.

Will it kill you to do me
a favor and keep it?

All I'm asking is that you
accept, as a gift,

no strings attached,

one genuine cowhide
traveling bag.

Will you, please?

Well, I'm so embarrassed, I...

Please.

All right.

Oh, it's really beautiful.

No strings attached.

Now, I've got to go.

Oh, here are the keys.

Where are you going?
Back to California?

No, Africa.

Ask me no questions.
It's a military secret.

Certain Government regulations,

and they just won't let you
tell people things like that.

I know there are a lot of things
that ought to be explained,

but I'll write you about it.

When are you leaving?

In a couple of days.

For Africa in two days?

Sure.

You can't go
with that on your face.

Where are you going now?

Oh, I'll look for another place.

For just two days?

Sure. Can't sleep
in the park.

Don't you think it's kinda silly

to move just for two days?

You mean?

Oh, boy!
Yeah, that's swell.

Because, you know,
when I get there,

they're liable to ask me where
I spent my last two days and,

if I said I'd spent my last
two days looking for a place,

they're liable
to think I'm a dope.

Yes, I guess they would.

You know, guys like that, they're
liable to expect a fella

to spend his last two days going
places and seeing the town.

Sure.

Well, thanks for the bag.

I mean, with somebody.

Oh, yeah. Well,

thanks for the bag.

Thanks for the bag. Say, do you think we could
go out together and have dinner tonight?

Say, do you think we could go out
together and have dinner tonight?

You forget I'm engaged and, uh,
I don't think he'd like it.

No, he wouldn't.

Furthermore, I think I have
a date with him tonight.

Well, that fixes that.

Uh, Mr. Carter,

what time have you?

7:30.

Well, he's supposed
to call at 8:00, you see,

and sometimes he gets into a conference,
and he can't even telephone,

so if that happens,
naturally the date is off.

So I'll wait for him till
8:00 and, if he doesn't call,

well, then I guess
it would be all right,

because, well, you're going to be
here such a short time, and...

And you're working
for the Government,

and it's everyone's
patriotic duty to do...

Maybe it's the wrong number.

Hello.

Oh, it's you.

Oh, well, what's the
matter with you?

I've got a cold.

Oh, that's too bad.

Oh, you really ought to do
something about that.

Yeah, take care of yourself.
Do something.

Oh, just a minute.

It's, uh, for you.
Mr. Dingle.

Hello.
Bill?

No, Joe.

Yes, well, you sound awful.

You better
take something for that.

How about going out
to dinner with me tonight?

I don't know
whether I can or not.

I won't know till 8:00.

I think I have a date.

Yeah, well, if I don't,
I'll meet you there.

Okay, Mill... Dingle.

Well, I think
I'd better get dressed.

Okay.

Excuse me.

Boy, you look lovely.

Oh, thank you.

It's 8:00.

Is it?

And our friend
hasn't phoned, has he?

No.

Well, in that case...

Well, in that case, I think
it might be all right.

That can't be
Mr. Pendergast,

he always phones
from downstairs.

He does?
Yes.

Hello, Miss Milligan.

Could I see you, please,
for a few minutes?

It's very important.

It's about a decision
I have to make.

Could I see you for
a few minutes, alone, please?

Couldn't it wait until tomorrow?

Oh, no, it can't wait till tomorrow.
It's important.

Who's this?

This is my fellow.
He lives downstairs.

How do you do,
Mr. Pendergast.

My name's Morton Rodakiewicz.

I gotta see you alone.

Excuse me.
I'll just be a minute.

Now, what is it
you want to tell me,

because I'm in a terrible hurry.

Do I want to join the
boy scouts, or don't I?

Well, of course you do.

But I'm not
the camp-craft type.

So should I join because I
don't like hunting and fishing

and hiking and camp-craft,
and ought to?

Or should I not join
because I don't like hunting

and fishing and hiking,
a... and camp-craft.

Well, yes, definitely.

It's some problem.

A person should know
if he's the camp-craft type.

Morton, I'll be
terribly disappointed

if you don't go and join the
boy scouts tonight, right now.

I'll do it.

Only I can't do it tonight
because it's too late,

but tomorrow I'll do it.

Oh, your phone is off the hook.

Here, I'll fix it.

There, there's my
good deed for today.

Already I'm a boy scout.

Will you be disappointed in
me if I wait until tomorrow?

No, Morton.

Oh, that's good.

Oh, your phone's ringing.
It's ringing there.

Thank you, Morton.

So long.

Hello.

Yes, Charles.

How are you feeling?

Why, I feel wonderful.

Oh, you do.

Well, um, I'll be right down.

That's my date.
I'm so sorry.

Have a good time.

Thank you. You have
a good time, too.

Have a good time.

Thank you, Morton.

Hey, what're you looking at?

At Capitol dome.

You ought not to be looking
out of those spy glasses.

Scram.

You can get in awful serious
trouble doing that.

Knock off, will you?

Everybody is giving their
spy glasses to the navy.

I read it in a paper.

Why don't you give your spy
glasses to the navy, too?

Because I'm a Jap.

Two.

It'll be a couple of moments before
I have a table for you, gentlemen.

There's plenty of room
at the bar.

I've come to the conclusion that we
ought to get married right away.

You have?

Yes, I have.

We've put it off long enough.

From now on it's
"Full steam ahead."

That is, with reservations.

What did I tell you?
Eight to every fella.

What did I tell you?
I'm not interested.

Cheer up, Joe.
We're out for a good time.

Well, I thought
you said something

about world conditions
being so unsettled and...

Exactly, there's no reason
for us to be unsettled, too.

How about
this Saturday afternoon?

We have half a holiday.

I'll apply for
the license tomorrow.

Why... Why, we can be
back at work

bright and early,
Monday morning.

Gentlemen, I have
your table for you now.

Oh, good. Thanks.
Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Pendergast.

How do you do,
Mr. Dingle?

Well, well, well,
this is a happy coincidence.

Joe! Joe,
come here, come here.

Meet my friend, Joe Carter.

Joe, this is
Charles J. Pendergast.

How do you do?
How do you do?

This is my fiancee, Miss Milligan.
Mr. Dingle, Mr. Carter.

Delighted, Miss Milligan.

Hello.

Why I, uh...
How do you do?

Mr. Carter.

Won't you sit down?

Yeah, sit down, Joe.

Here, have this chair.

I seem to feel we've met
somewhere before, Miss Milligan.

No, I guess not.

I guess not, too.

Mr. Dingle is in Washington
to discuss the housing plan.

Oh, indeed.

I suppose you're crowded like
everyone else in Washington?

Yes, I'm crowded
like nobody else.

Then you realize what a
problem we're up against.

Yes, Joe.

There are cases on record
where two and three people

have practically been forced
to live in the same room.

No.
Yes.

I tell you the condition
is deplorable.

Kind of cozy, though,
don't you think?

Mr. Carter,

I lie awake nights just
worrying about the situation.

No.

Little do you know how much
you've got to worry about.

Oh, yes, I do!

Oh, no, you don't.

Oh, yes, I do.

Oh, no, you don't.

Why, at the present time,

at least 30,0004-party units
could be absorbed

just by the incoming
populace alone.

I wonder how many single-party
units it would take

to relieve
the present situation.

Can you guess?

I don't have to guess.
I know. 187,683.

Have you facts and figures
to substantiate...

I certainly have.

Well, well.

Say, why don't you two
young people go and dance

while Charlie and I
talk this thing over?

Oh, but I don't think...
Charles?

I suppose it's all right.

Can you figure the same way
on a 3-party unit plan?

That music, it, uh, disturbs me.

I can't concentrate.

My boy, you don't know
how you've simplified

this whole problem
for everyone concerned.

Come up to my suite
where you can concentrate.

We'll have this thing all ready to
present to the board tomorrow morning.

Come on. We'll roll up our
sleeves and get busy.

Take good care of Miss Milligan.

Don't worry.

I'll be back, Constance. I...

Who taught you to rumba?

Some girl, I'll bet.

Was she nice?

Not half as nice as you.

Why, Connie, hello.

Oh, hello.

How are you?

Oh, I'm fine, I guess.

Miss Allen, Miss Bilby,
Mr. Carter.

How do you do,
Mr. Carter?

Have you been in Washington long, Mr.
Carter?

Well, as a matter of fact...

Where you from,
Mr. Carter?

I'm from...

Mr. Carter
is from California.

Oh, Hollywood?
Burbank.

Oh, you couldn't be in the P-38
Interceptor Business, could you?

No. Potatoes,
that's my line.

Mr. Carter
is only going to be...

You're a farmer.

Burbank potatoes.

Hello, Betty.

Oh, hello.

Uh, Miss Milligan,
Mr. Carter, Miss Hopper...

How do you do?

...Miss Chasen, Miss Bilby,
Miss Ewing, Miss Dalton.

How do you do?

This is Miss finch, Miss Dalton, Miss
Goesekin, Miss Harper, Mr. Carter.

How do you do?

Miss Allen, Miss Goesekin,
Miss Finch, Mr. Carter.

How do you do?

I'm Miss Milligan.

Oh! Well.

Miss Milligan?
Yes.

You're wanted on the telephone.

Oh, thank you.

Excuse me.

Could you show me where
the telephone is, please?

Oh, it's, uh,
right this way, miss.

Oh, thank you.

Over here.

Yes, I think so.

Oh, well, won't you sit down?

Oh, yes, thank you.

Move over, Casey.

You mean you're not
coming back at all?

Mr. Dingle says that Mr. Carter
will be glad to take you home.

Mr. Dingle says that you won't be taking
Mr. Carter very much out of his way.

Oh, it isn't
out of his way at all.

You know your eyes are blue like the
color of your necktie, aren't they?

Oh, they are not. They're
gray like his shirt.

Let's see, oh, no,
I think they're hazel.

Oh, honey, they're blue!

I say they're gray.

They're blue.

Mr. Pendergast phoned and said he
would like you to take me home.

Well, you don't have to if you
don't want to because I...

I couldn't let you go alone.

Well, look, you could
always come back later,

you know, if you want to.

Oh, no!

Who's "we"?

Oh, my mother and father
and my sister.

Then, on Sundays, we generally
go down to the beach.

What beach?

Pacific Ocean beach.

Oh, who goes?

Whole gang.

Like who?

Oh, like Bob Rowe,
Bill Weidemeyer,

and Jeff York.

Well, don't you ever
go with any girls?

Of course.

Well, who?
Helen Tuttle.

Is she your girl?

I just go with her.

Long time?

No, just...
Just a girl I know.

Is she your girl?
No, I just go with her.

Is she attractive?

I guess so.

Well, who did you go
with before that?

Oh. Elsie.

How long?
A couple months.

What happened?

She wanted to get married.

Well, what happened?
She got married.

Who did you go with before that?

Martha and Adele, I think.

What happened to them?

I still go with them.

Are you afraid to get
married or something?

No.

But, well, I...

I don't want to get involved.

Well,

uh, they say

that's what happens to a
man when he gets married.

Yeah, well,

marriage is okay,
if you want to be.

I expect to be very happy.

You do?
Yes.

I consider myself
a very lucky little lady.

How's that?

Being engaged to
Mr. Pendergast.

Oh, yeah.
$8,600 a year.

Oh, that's a lot of money.

It sure is.

Especially if, uh,

people are highly intelligent like Mr.
Pen... Pendergast

and know how to budget
and... and plan.

Sure.
Uh,

we're planning very carefully.

Yeah, that's the way
to do it, all right.

Take my engagement ring.

Don't you think it's nice?

Not gaudy, I mean.

You bet.

Well, we...

We thought, Mr. Pendergast and
I, that it would be better

to get a conservative ring

and put that extra money
into our home, you see.

That's the way
to do it, all right.

We found a... A lovely
little house in Georgetown.

For after the emergency,
of course.

Sure.

Mr. Pendergast is so busy now

that he just doesn't have time

to think of it even.

I can understand that.

Why, just last week,

one evening, he had

a dinner conference with Leon M.

Henderson and Donald

M. Nelson.

Leon Henderson and Donald...

M. Nelson.

Must be an important man.

Yes, and so considerate,
you know.

Why,

when my cousin had
a stamp collection, he...

He used to save all
his foreign stamps

from his office

for it and gave them
to me for her, my cousin.

Is that so?

Don't you think that's
wonderful, a man in his

position to do
a thing like that?

You bet.

Well, you see, that's the
way with those older men

like Mr. Pendergast.

A girl gets to

appreciate their more mature...

Viewpoint.

I'd better go.

Good night,
Mr. Carter.

Good night, Miss Milligan.

I almost forgot where I lived.

Good night.

Where you headin' for?
We have to work for a living.

Can't you see

we're all bedded down here,
peaceful like?

Well, I declare,

why don't you go to bed at a reasonable
hour and let somebody sleep.

Must be one of them
new Republicans,

just got into office.

Here, I have my...

Dingle's key.

Connie?

Yes?

Are you asleep?

No.

Me, neither.

I've been thinking.

I've been thinking, too.

What about?

Mr. Dingle.

It's all right
for Dingle to talk.

He hasn't any decisions to make.

But for a person like me... Huh?

Well, we have to

think things out
very, very carefully

and be sure we're going
in the right direction.

For instance,

Mr. Pendergast wants us
to be married right away.

You know, our engagement?

Yeah, I know.

Well, you take my case, too.

I have to go across
on special duty,

I'm not supposed
to talk about it,

but I guess under these
circumstances, it would be all right.

I may never come back.

And under these circumstances a
fellow has to figure on that.

Yes, he certainly has.

Connie?

Yes?

Are you asleep?

No.

Have you got an aspirin?

No, but I got a headache.

Me, too.

I can't sleep.

You can't?

No.

Why can't you?

I love you, Connie.

Did you hear what I said?

Yes.

Well,

if you feel the same way,
would you tell me?

Would you stay
right where you are?

Yes.

I love you more than
anything in the world.

You promised.

Connie.

Connie.

Yes?

You asked me if I was afraid
to get married.

I'm not afraid.

I mean, will you marry me?

I want to marry you, Connie.

Thank you. I'd...
I'd love to.

How? When?

You said you'd be gone
in a couple of days.

Yeah.

Well, then you'd go away,

and we might never
see each other again.

Yeah, but...

Well, don't you see?

Yeah, I guess you're right.

Oh, it's an
awful problem, isn't it,

darling?

It sure is,

dear.

I'd be away over there,

and you'd be over here.

And I'd be worrying about you,

and you'd be worrying about me.

Yeah, that's no good at all.

I guess not, huh?

I guess you'd better
go to sleep,

darling.

Good night, dear.

Good night, Mr...

Darling.

What's your name?

Joe Carter.

My name's Evans.
This is Mr. Pike.

Federal Bureau of Investigation.

FBI, huh?

Yeah. Want to talk to you.

What's going on here?

Don't be alarmed.

We're just having a look around, Mrs.
Carter.

I'm not Mrs. Carter,
I'm Miss Milligan.

He's just a friend of mine.

A very good friend.

Look, he lives in here
and I live in here.

As a matter of fact,
she's my landlady.

What do you fellas
want here, anyhow?

We got a report that you've been
having a peek at Washington.

Yeah? Well,
what's wrong with that?

Depends on how you see it,
Mr. Carter.

Nice view from here.

Right into the Government
Printing Office

with a pair of binoculars.

The binoculars. They think I've
been looking at Government stuff.

Your friend, Morton Rodakiewicz.

What's this?

My uniform.

Why don't you wear it?

Well, I always sleep
in my pajamas.

I mean earlier in the evening.
Why didn't you wear it

when you were looking out
with those binoculars?

Well, I can see
all right without it on.

Well, you got a mouth full of
funny answers, haven't you?

You'd better get dressed.
Both of you.

Why do I have to get dressed?

Because, uh, traffic's jammed
up enough the way it is.

All right, let's get going.

Oh, uh...
You stay here.

Say,

I think they made a mistake
down at headquarters.

This fella don't
look like a Jap.

Well, your papers
seem to be in order.

But we did have reason
to suspicion you.

The only thing
we're concerned about

is the report over the phone

that there was a Japanese
at your address,

studying the Government
Printing Office

through binoculars.
Well, it wasn't me.

There's never been
a Japanese near the place.

Can you think of anyone
besides yourself and Carter

that might have been seen
around the apartment?

Well, Mr. Dingle,
I told you before.

Oh, yes. Now,
how about Dingle, Pike?

Well, I...
I phoned him, sir.

He said he'd be right over.

He wanted to know if
he could bring a friend.

Does he think we're serving tea?

I don't know, sir.

It was nice of you to come
traipsing over here

with me at this time of night.

Well, you must know me
well enough by this time,

Mr. Dingle, to realize that

when things have to be done,
I don't procrastinate.

I don't know what
this is all about,

and there's no telling
how long I'll be here.

Now, tut, tut, tut.
Everyone over here knows me.

I'm sure my presence
will speed things up.

Then we can get
back to our work.

That's the spirit.
The average man would say,

"Let it go until tomorrow."
Not you, Charlie.

You're a go-getter,
my boy, a go-getter!

Why, uh, hello, uh, uh... Pike.

I'm Pendergast.

This is my good friend,
Benjamin Dingle.

Oh, yes, Mr. Dingle.

Who's on duty?
Harding.

Harding?

Why, I know Harding well.

Come on, Mr. Dingle.

We'll get to the bottom
of this in record time.

Hello.
Hello, come in.

Harding, old man, how are you?
Haven't seen you in weeks.

I want to ask you
a little favor, Harding.

I'm a very busy man, so if
you'll just postpone

what you're doing
and give me a few minutes.

I'd like to...
I knew you'd understand.

A very good friend of mine was
requested to appear here tonight.

In fact, he's working with
me, and we're very busy,

so, if you could...
I forgot to introduce him.

This is Mr. Dingle.

How do you do?
How do you do?

Mr. Dingle is...

Constance.

What... What are you
doing here?

What is it?
What's the trouble?

What's the matter?
Speak to me.

Hello.

It's nothing to get alarmed about, Mr.
Pendergast, merely a routine investigation.

We received a wild report
over the phone. Yes?

We receive hundreds of them.
Usually mean nothing.

Well, I should hope so.

I've known Miss Milligan
for six years.

As a matter of fact, she's in
my department and we're...

Carter!

How've you been?

Really, Constance, I'm
afraid I don't understand.

Look, the whole thing could be explained
if you'd just let Mr. Dingle speak.

Please, Miss Milligan.

Excuse me.

Now then, Carter.

Present.

Present.
Uh, step over here, please.

Uh, step over here, please.

Did... Did you say that
Mr. Dingle could explain?

You, Pendergast!
Yes?

You can talk after
I'm through with Carter.

What has Carter
got to do with it?

Sit down!

Carter was in Miss Milligan's
apartment when we arrived,

and he was in possession
of these binoculars.

What was he doing with his
binoculars in your apartment?

Now then, your address,
Miss Milligan?

1708 D Street, apartment 2B.

I beg your pardon.
I meant Carter.

Burbank.

It's, uh, 651 Sunnycrest,

the house on the corner.

No, here in Washington.

Well, that's, uh,
6310 munitions building.

I mean your
Washington address,

where you sleep.

Where I sleep?

On D Street.
I think it's 1708.

1708 D Street, apartment what?

Apartment?
Apartment number.

2, uh,

B.

I, uh, told you
I thought you wouldn't

understand, Charles.

But how could it be?

I only introduced you
to him tonight!

Well, I... I forgot to tell you.
We met before.

It can all be explained.

You see, I sublet
half my apartment

to help relieve
the housing shortage.

To Carter?
No! To Mr. Dingle,

and Mr. Dingle sublet half
his half to Mr. Carter.

I'd like to believe you,
Constance.

You'd believe Dingle,
wouldn't you?

Yes, just ask Mr. Dingle.

Mr. Dingle.

I beg your pardon.

Uh, you've got to help us out.

Yes, Ben.

Of course, certainly.

What can I do?

Well, Mr. Pendergast
thinks that Joe and I...

Really, Constance, I... I don't
know what you expect to prove now.

That Dingle was in the apartment all
the time and rented half to me.

Yes.

What apartment?

Miss Milligan's apartment.

Has Miss Milligan
got an apartment?

Are you kidding?

You know I have.
You lived there.

I'm sorry, but I live
at the Winton James Hotel,

don't I, Charlie?
Of course.

You were over there with me
this evening, weren't you?

Yes, of course.
They know I was.

Mr. Dingle, how could you?

I'm very sorry, I'd like to
help out you young folks,

but after all,
there's no use lying

when the truth is
staring you in the face.

There certainly isn't.

If you were a younger man,
I'd punch you in the nose.

And if you were a smarter man,
you'd use your brains

instead of your fists.

Come in.

I'm sorry I thought
I was in my own office.

Uh, Major Denton
to identify Carter.

Oh, yes.
Come in, Major.

Are you Mr. Harding?
That's right, how do you do?

Hello, Sergeant. Uh,
what's the trouble?

I, uh, they think I was looking

at the Government Printing
Office through those binoculars.

Well, were you?
No, sir.

We've already discovered
that, Major.

Now, if you're willing to
vouch for Carter...

Certainly, he's here
on special duty.

Oh, thank you very much.
Is that all?

That's all and thanks
for your trouble.

It's no trouble at all.

Good night.
Good night.

You have your orders, Sergeant?

Yes, sir.

Well, I guess that about clears
everything up, Inspector.

That's right.
Show him out, Evans.

I'm sorry if this has caused
any of you embarrassment.

Embarrassment?

Mr. Dingle. Mr. Dingle!
I beg your pardon?

Did you or did you not live at
1708 D Street, apartment 2B?

Shh!
Talk!

Tell him.
Tell what?

That you lived in my apartment.

Is that true? You lived
in that apartment?

Hasn't anybody brains enough
to push this little button?

Joe.

You!

What?

What?
Our friend here

has finally broken down
and told the truth.

Oh, he has, huh?

If that's true, why
didn't you say so inside?

Yes.
Scandal, my boy, scandal.

A thing like this
gets around... Shh.

Of all the mean,
contemptible, low, low...

Down.

Down.
Down, yeah.

Take me to the Washington
Sun Building. Let's go.

You'll have to wait.
I've got to get a full load.

Taxi.

Mr. Dingle,
Mr. Dingle,

surely you don't really think
there'll be a scandal?

I don't dare think, Charles.

But the FBI has
a reputation for secrecy.

I know, but many people
saw them yanked out

of her apartment in the
wee hours of the morning.

A thing like that
could ruin a man.

Ruin a man?
What about a lady?

Yes, it won't do her any good.

As far as I'm concerned, my boy,

it's every man for himself.

Winton James hotel.
I've got to get a full load.

No, you don't.
Now, you wait for me!

I want to have a talk with you.

Go ahead.
I've got to get a full load.

All right, I'm a full load.
Taxi.

1708 D Street.

Now, see here, Mr. Dingle,

if there's a scandal,
you're responsible.

You've put us all
in a bad light.

I know. It was cowardly of
me, but I can't afford to...

You can't afford? You're going to Michigan.
I have to stay here.

Our engagement is widely known.
You get off scot free by lying,

and I'm in the middle of things.

But you're young, Charlie.

I am a young man, yes, with a
career that's just beginning.

Yes, by all means
let's protect your career.

I don't matter.
My position doesn't make

any difference at all. It's only Charles J.
Pendergast...

Don't you shush me.

You've been shushing me
for 22 months now,

you've shushed your last shush.

For 22 months, I've been engaged
to a career, not a man.

Here, perhaps this will relieve you
of this embarrassing situation.

Now take your career
and go run for cover.

Constance, maybe I was hasty.

You certainly were.

Then, I apologize. Now, will
you take back the ring?

No!

I'd think twice if I
were you, Miss Milligan.

About what?

In your position, you can't afford
to burn your bridges behind you.

You mean by being engaged
to Mr. Smug here,

I can keep my respectability?

Not only by being engaged, but a quick
marriage before the story gets out.

Then let it get out!

Look here, Ben, you're making

a 5-alarm fire
out of this thing.

Nobody's going to hear
of this story unless you...

You shoot off your big mouth.

Me?

Joe, you're doing me
a great injustice.

Hey, mister.

- Hey, mister.
- You in the corner pocket.

You in the corner pocket.

Yeah?

You wanted the Washington Sun
Building, didn't you?

Yeah.
Well, there it is.

All right, pardon me, please.

Oh, me,
it's been a dull night,

but I finally got a good story,

thanks to you, Mr...
Mr. Pendergast, isn't it?

Yeah, Pendergast,
Charles J., O.P.L.

All right, thanks.

There you are, driver.

Got a deadline to make.

Good morning.
Good morning.

A newspaperman!

Your friend just stole 3rd base.

A million people in this
town, and it had to be

a newspaperman in
the corner pocket.

That's bad.

Well, I'm sorry about this,
Connie, but don't cry.

Who's crying?
She is.

She's got a perfect right to.
Why not?

Her name will be mud by morning.

Well, can't we... Oh, don't
bother about me, gentlemen.

Every man for himself.

I warned her about burning
Charlie behind her.

Look, just don't bother
about me, because I'll...

I'll give up hope,
I'll get out of town,

I'll go back home
and be miserable.

You started all this, Ben.

I know, I know.
It was cowardly of me.

If I didn't have to
leave in the morning,

I'd do something
about it myself.

What would you do?

Don't be stupid,
what could he do?

Telephone Charlie, get the
ring, and use it himself.

Me be engaged to Joe
Carter, while he's away?

No, married.
Kill the scandal.

Well, that's preposterous.

Now, wait a minute.
I only mean

one of these in-name-only propositions.
That's all.

Well,

I'd be willing to cooperate.

Cooperate. He...
He wouldn't, would he?

Well, that's mighty big of him.

Well, what's she got
to be so huffy about?

What're you getting
so huffy about?

I guess... I guess he wouldn't
even be happy that way, would he?

Would you?

Well, if it's that way,

what's being happy
got to do with it?

What's being happy
got to do with it?

Nothing.

Right.

All it needs is
a little teamwork.

You two cooperate on a quick
ceremony for the sake of all of us.

Then, an annulment is a simple matter
if you don't cooperate any further.

Miss Milligan stays right here on
her war job, with her head high,

Joe goes overseas with
not a thing on his mind.

Well,

well, if he'd do it,

I'd be willing to
cooperate that far.

Well, we'd have
to do it quickly,

because I have to leave in
exactly 26 hours, hot or cold.

Oh, well, then it can't be done.

It takes three days
to get married.

It could be right now in
South Carolina, hot or cold.

South Carolina? That's
hundreds of miles from here.

By plane, it's right next door.

I've got a little schedule here.

Here, take this down.

A schedule is a mighty handy
thing at times, Miss Milligan.

Now, let me see.
It is now 4:21 a.m.

You could be at
the airport by 4:50.

Your plane leaves at 5:42,
hot or cold.

Cold.

I could be back at my
hotel by 6:00 or 6:22,

telephoning Charleston
and making all arrangements.

You arrive at Charleston
at 8:43, hot or cold.

At 9:35, you get your license.

At 10:15, you're standing
in front of the minister.

At 10:30, you're married
and, at 12:00, hot or cold,

lunch.

Here's your
50 cent blue plate.

What kind of fish is this?

Catfish.

Here's your nice boiled rice.

What's the matter, honey?

I never thought when
they threw rice at me,

it would be boiled.

Look, we'd better hurry up

and eat our lunch
and get out of here.

Let's go.

Is there something
wrong, mister?

No, everything's just dandy.

Well, then why is
the young lady crying?

Because she's so happy.

Oh, for goodness sake.

Newlyweds.

What's wrong with newlyweds?

Oh. I, uh,

I'd better give you
this license,

'cause then if anybody asks you if you're
married, you can just show them that.

Oh, thanks.

And thanks for marrying me, Joe.

Mmm, it was a pleasure.

Well, I...

Guess I'd better go up
and pack my things,

so you can get an annulment,

and I can go to Africa
with nothing on my mind.

Yeah.

Uh, where do you think
you'll stay tonight?

Oh, I'll just

roam around town, I guess.

I haven't seen much of
Washington and, anyway,

I probably wouldn't sleep
very much.

Well, that, uh,

seems kind of silly.

I mean your...
Your room is still vacant,

and you're... You're paid
up until tomorrow.

Do you think
it would be all right?

Well, if the FBI come,

we'll just show them this.

♪ Don't try to steal
the sweetheart

♪ Of a soldier

♪ It's up to you
to play a manly part

♪ Though he's over there

♪ And she's over here

♪ Still she's always
in his heart

♪ They may not meet again

♪ To love each other

♪ Still he prays
that he'll come back

♪ Some day, some day

You'll write to me
and let me know

where you are, won't you?

Sure, when I know where I am.

When I know where you are,

I'll write to you

to let you know where I am.

Yeah,

because I'm gonna
worry about you.

Oh, you mustn't do that,

you have to go with
nothing on your mind.

I know, but I can't help
worrying about you.

Good night.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

♪ To love each other

♪ Still he prays
that he'll come back someday

♪ Someday

♪ While he fights for you and me

♪ To protect our liberty

♪ Don't try to steal

What is it, Connie?

I forgot to take it.

To take what?

I forgot to take my bag
on my honeymoon.

Well, maybe you can take it
on another honeymoon sometime

with somebody else.

I don't want to
with somebody else!

Oh, and another thing,

don't take in any more roomers.

Why?

Why?

Because you pick up a lot of
riffraff that way, that's why.

Well, I was only trying
to be patriotic.

Well, you're sending
a husband to Africa.

That's patriotic enough. Don't
take in any more roomers.

But, Joe...

Now look, you know
what happened last time.

It ought to be a lesson to you.

What happened?

Nothing!

I'm not the kind of a person
anything happens to.

I should think you'd know that.

Yeah, well, as long as you're
married to me, no more roomers.

Now, you're talking
like a real husband.

You're only supposed to
cooperate so far, you know.

I know, well, I am
a real husband,

until it's annulled.

Oh, annulled, annulled.
That's all you talk about.

Oh, for gosh sakes.
All I said was no more roomers.

But, Joe,

supposing I don't
get a job right away?

How'll I pay the rent?
At least a roomer would help.

Yeah. Well, I'm gonna have
my pay signed over to you.

You don't need a job.

I don't want your pay.
Well, you're gonna get it.

And I've saved some dough, and
you're gonna get that, too.

I'm gonna sign my insurance
over to you,

then if anything happens to
me, you're gonna get $10,000.

If anything happened to you,
I wouldn't want that money!

Well, I'd rather have you take the
money than to take in roomers.

Oh, just promise me
you'll take care of yourself.

Now, don't cry, baby!

♪ In love or war,
with people like us

♪ We've got to work fast

♪ Or we'll miss the bus

♪ If you straddle a fence,
and you sit and wait

♪ You get too little,
and you get it too late

♪ So what do you say
we see it thru?

♪ You stick by me,
and I'll stick by you

♪ And our 18 children
will be glad we said

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!

♪ And our 18 children
will be glad we said

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!

♪ Damn the torpedoes,
full speed ahead!