Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
Downloaded from
YTS.MX
2
00:00:02,583 --> 00:00:06,000
(light orchestral music)
3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000
Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
4
00:00:23,167 --> 00:00:26,583
(grand orchestral music)
5
00:00:43,208 --> 00:00:46,708
(upbeat orchestral music)
6
00:00:51,417 --> 00:00:55,124
♪ Not now, you keep saying ♪
7
00:00:55,125 --> 00:00:59,166
♪ You're not ready to fall ♪
8
00:00:59,167 --> 00:01:03,291
♪ But me, I keep praying ♪
9
00:01:03,292 --> 00:01:07,332
♪ My heart's to the wall ♪
10
00:01:07,333 --> 00:01:10,916
♪ It's all to exciting ♪
11
00:01:10,917 --> 00:01:13,957
♪ How can you resist ♪
12
00:01:13,958 --> 00:01:15,874
♪ I never seen eyes ♪
13
00:01:15,875 --> 00:01:17,457
♪ Nearly that size ♪
14
00:01:17,458 --> 00:01:22,458
♪ You gotta be Kissed ♪
15
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:27,207
♪ Not now, you're repeating ♪
16
00:01:27,208 --> 00:01:31,249
♪ For mercy I plead ♪
17
00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:35,416
♪ It's no way of treating ♪
18
00:01:35,417 --> 00:01:38,999
♪ A lover in need ♪
19
00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:42,416
♪ Although I keep trying ♪
20
00:01:42,417 --> 00:01:45,541
♪ The fruit's still on the bow ♪
21
00:01:45,542 --> 00:01:47,457
♪ It's meant to be picked ♪
22
00:01:47,458 --> 00:01:50,207
♪ But you got me licked ♪
23
00:01:50,208 --> 00:01:55,208
♪ And how ♪
24
00:01:55,292 --> 00:01:58,041
♪ How can you say ♪
25
00:01:58,042 --> 00:02:00,208
♪ Not now ♪
26
00:02:40,208 --> 00:02:42,249
- Come on Rose, let's have a smile.
27
00:02:42,250 --> 00:02:43,583
- Yeah, come on.
28
00:02:45,083 --> 00:02:47,582
Can you smile for me?
29
00:02:47,583 --> 00:02:51,250
(speaking foreign language)
30
00:02:53,083 --> 00:02:54,124
- Could we have one of
31
00:02:54,125 --> 00:02:55,582
Comrade Petrovyan on his own?
32
00:02:55,583 --> 00:02:59,250
(speaking foreign language)
33
00:03:01,625 --> 00:03:02,875
Lovely, lovely.
34
00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:18,457
- Oh!
35
00:03:18,458 --> 00:03:19,458
Lovely.
36
00:03:34,792 --> 00:03:39,792
(camera shutter clicking)
(light orchestral music)
37
00:04:31,042 --> 00:04:31,875
(whistles)
38
00:04:31,876 --> 00:04:33,291
- Oi, look at this, lads.
39
00:04:33,292 --> 00:04:35,958
(men whistling)
40
00:04:39,417 --> 00:04:42,833
(light orchestral music)
41
00:04:47,375 --> 00:04:50,042
(all clamouring)
42
00:05:01,292 --> 00:05:02,375
- Incredible.
43
00:05:05,875 --> 00:05:10,124
(laughing)
(shouting)
44
00:05:10,125 --> 00:05:13,792
(speaking foreign language)
45
00:05:26,250 --> 00:05:28,333
(grunts)
46
00:05:40,375 --> 00:05:41,375
- Hey!
47
00:05:42,792 --> 00:05:43,708
- [Man] What's she doing?
48
00:05:43,708 --> 00:05:44,542
- Yellow car boot!
49
00:05:44,542 --> 00:05:45,542
Hurry!
50
00:05:47,292 --> 00:05:48,625
Yellow car boot!
51
00:05:49,708 --> 00:05:51,291
Yellow car boot!
52
00:05:51,292 --> 00:05:52,125
Hurry!
53
00:05:52,126 --> 00:05:55,625
(upbeat orchestral music)
54
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:05,625
- Ah!
55
00:06:12,167 --> 00:06:13,167
- Rudi!
56
00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:18,667
(gasps)
57
00:06:28,917 --> 00:06:32,207
(all shouting)
58
00:06:32,208 --> 00:06:33,208
- Look out!
59
00:06:33,208 --> 00:06:34,208
Maniac!
60
00:06:38,875 --> 00:06:41,458
(all shouting)
61
00:06:42,667 --> 00:06:46,167
(upbeat orchestral music)
62
00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:50,042
(birds chirping)
63
00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:02,750
(sobbing)
64
00:08:07,042 --> 00:08:08,457
- Afternoon, Hoskins.
65
00:08:08,458 --> 00:08:09,417
- Afternoon, Commander.
66
00:08:09,418 --> 00:08:10,582
- All well?
67
00:08:10,583 --> 00:08:12,124
- Aye, aye, sir.
68
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,249
How's the car running?
69
00:08:13,250 --> 00:08:14,208
- Oh, not bad.
70
00:08:14,209 --> 00:08:16,041
Seems to have developed a slight bump
71
00:08:16,042 --> 00:08:18,042
in the rear end, though.
72
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,417
(light orchestral music)
73
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,000
- Psst!
74
00:09:02,958 --> 00:09:03,958
Psst!
75
00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,000
Psst!
76
00:09:09,125 --> 00:09:10,125
Excuse me!
77
00:09:11,500 --> 00:09:12,583
- Oh, my God.
78
00:09:27,375 --> 00:09:29,875
(opera music)
79
00:09:33,292 --> 00:09:37,125
(singing in foreign language)
80
00:09:39,500 --> 00:09:40,500
- Nancy!
81
00:09:42,958 --> 00:09:43,958
Nancy!
82
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,333
Nancy!
83
00:10:23,083 --> 00:10:24,624
- Oh!
84
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:25,458
Hello.
85
00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:27,457
- Hello, my darling.
86
00:10:27,458 --> 00:10:28,458
Is your mother in?
87
00:10:28,458 --> 00:10:29,458
- No, no, she's gone to London.
88
00:10:29,458 --> 00:10:30,458
Shopping.
89
00:10:30,459 --> 00:10:31,541
- That'll cost me something.
90
00:10:31,542 --> 00:10:32,542
(chuckles)
91
00:10:32,542 --> 00:10:33,375
Mm.
92
00:10:33,375 --> 00:10:34,333
Any important messages?
93
00:10:34,334 --> 00:10:35,791
- No, it hasn't rung all day.
94
00:10:35,792 --> 00:10:36,625
- Ah.
95
00:10:36,625 --> 00:10:37,625
- Maybe the Prime Minister
96
00:10:37,626 --> 00:10:39,582
doesn't love you anymore.
97
00:10:39,583 --> 00:10:41,041
- Nancy, please.
98
00:10:41,042 --> 00:10:42,624
That's how rumours start.
99
00:10:42,625 --> 00:10:44,916
- How was the Ministry of Defence today?
100
00:10:44,917 --> 00:10:46,707
- Absolute hell.
101
00:10:46,708 --> 00:10:48,249
- Oh, poor daddy.
102
00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:49,582
A cup of tea?
103
00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:50,624
- No thank you, my darling.
104
00:10:50,625 --> 00:10:53,582
A nice bath, and then I'm going fishing.
105
00:10:53,583 --> 00:10:54,832
- Fishing?
106
00:10:54,833 --> 00:10:55,833
You can't!
107
00:10:57,583 --> 00:10:58,583
- Why not?
108
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,999
- Gerry's coming down this afternoon.
109
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,207
Staying the weekend.
110
00:11:04,208 --> 00:11:05,249
- Gerry, huh?
111
00:11:05,250 --> 00:11:06,707
Who the devil is Gerry?
112
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:08,124
- Gerry Buss.
113
00:11:08,125 --> 00:11:09,000
I told you about him.
114
00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:11,166
He's my boyfriend.
115
00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:13,416
- Not another arty-crafty dropout.
116
00:11:13,417 --> 00:11:15,124
- He's a civil servant.
117
00:11:15,125 --> 00:11:16,457
- My God.
118
00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:17,832
They're the worst.
119
00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:20,832
- You should have a lot in common.
120
00:11:20,833 --> 00:11:23,957
He's a PA to the PPS to the PM.
121
00:11:23,958 --> 00:11:25,041
- Oh, never mind, darling.
122
00:11:25,042 --> 00:11:26,749
He'll get over it.
123
00:11:26,750 --> 00:11:28,166
I'll meet Gerry in the morning.
124
00:11:28,167 --> 00:11:29,167
I'm going fishing.
125
00:11:29,168 --> 00:11:30,749
- I hope you don't catch anything.
126
00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:31,583
- I will.
127
00:11:31,583 --> 00:11:32,417
I'm not like you
128
00:11:32,418 --> 00:11:34,041
and your young men, you know.
129
00:11:34,042 --> 00:11:36,332
When I get my hooks in some poor fish,
130
00:11:36,333 --> 00:11:37,750
I land him first time.
131
00:11:43,417 --> 00:11:45,583
(panting)
132
00:11:47,792 --> 00:11:50,625
(classical music)
133
00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:53,667
(panting)
134
00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:55,957
- All right, Hoskins.
135
00:11:55,958 --> 00:11:57,457
(wheezing)
136
00:11:57,458 --> 00:11:58,458
Take your time.
137
00:11:58,459 --> 00:12:00,708
(wheezing)
138
00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:03,957
Something's happened in the garden?
139
00:12:03,958 --> 00:12:06,291
(wheezing)
140
00:12:06,292 --> 00:12:08,541
You've got two big chrysanthemums?
141
00:12:08,542 --> 00:12:10,792
(wheezing)
142
00:12:11,917 --> 00:12:14,916
You want to rejoin the navy?
143
00:12:14,917 --> 00:12:16,624
- Commander!
144
00:12:16,625 --> 00:12:18,957
Defective in the car!
145
00:12:18,958 --> 00:12:20,457
- I'll get the garage to fix it.
146
00:12:20,458 --> 00:12:21,458
- No, no!
147
00:12:21,458 --> 00:12:22,292
Some Russian bloke.
148
00:12:22,293 --> 00:12:23,874
This sexy beast put him
149
00:12:23,875 --> 00:12:25,416
in your father's car.
150
00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:27,166
- It's been a long day, Hoskins.
151
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:28,874
- [Man] We interrupt this
programme to give you the
152
00:12:28,875 --> 00:12:31,916
latest news on the defective Russian.
153
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,541
Russian dancer who
defected in London today
154
00:12:34,542 --> 00:12:36,791
has been named as Rudi Petrovyan
155
00:12:36,792 --> 00:12:39,207
and the young British
girl who assisted him
156
00:12:39,208 --> 00:12:41,624
has been named as Barbara Wilcox,
157
00:12:41,625 --> 00:12:42,957
a strip tease artist
158
00:12:42,958 --> 00:12:44,207
working in a London nightclub.
159
00:12:44,208 --> 00:12:46,124
- I might have known it.
160
00:12:46,125 --> 00:12:48,374
- [Man] Eyewitnesses
described her as blonde,
161
00:12:48,375 --> 00:12:49,375
of medium height,
162
00:12:49,376 --> 00:12:51,749
wearing brown shoes, pink panties,
163
00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:53,083
and no brassier.
164
00:12:54,917 --> 00:12:57,291
- And he's in the boot of Father's car!
165
00:12:57,292 --> 00:12:59,207
- Your father didn't
know nothing about it.
166
00:12:59,208 --> 00:13:00,374
So this blonde bit says.
167
00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:01,208
- What, the one with the
168
00:13:01,209 --> 00:13:02,874
brown shoes, the pink and-
169
00:13:02,875 --> 00:13:04,166
- No, she's covered up now.
170
00:13:04,167 --> 00:13:05,416
- And she's here?
171
00:13:05,417 --> 00:13:06,791
- In the rhododendrons.
172
00:13:06,792 --> 00:13:07,792
- Oh!
173
00:13:09,125 --> 00:13:12,458
- I hope this doesn't affect my pension.
174
00:13:16,792 --> 00:13:18,791
- [Man] The defection
of Petrovyan comes at a
175
00:13:18,792 --> 00:13:20,582
particularly embarrassing moment
176
00:13:20,583 --> 00:13:21,874
for the government,
177
00:13:21,875 --> 00:13:22,957
with the visit of the Russian
178
00:13:22,958 --> 00:13:26,291
foreign minister less than a week away.
179
00:13:26,292 --> 00:13:29,041
(man shouts)
180
00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:30,999
- Father must have the key with him.
181
00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:32,374
- Mad, that's what you are, Miss Nancy.
182
00:13:32,375 --> 00:13:33,832
Aiding and abetting criminals.
183
00:13:33,833 --> 00:13:35,082
- Nonsense.
184
00:13:35,083 --> 00:13:35,917
You heard what the poor girl
185
00:13:35,918 --> 00:13:38,041
told us, it was love at first sight.
186
00:13:38,042 --> 00:13:39,082
- I heard what she told us, all right.
187
00:13:39,083 --> 00:13:40,791
This Russkie picked her up in some London
188
00:13:40,792 --> 00:13:42,291
club where she strips twice nightly.
189
00:13:42,292 --> 00:13:44,749
- You have no soul, Hoskins.
190
00:13:44,750 --> 00:13:45,750
(knocks)
191
00:13:45,751 --> 00:13:48,332
You'll have to wait till I get the key.
192
00:13:48,333 --> 00:13:50,666
(speaking foreign language)
193
00:13:50,667 --> 00:13:51,832
- Is he all right?
194
00:13:51,833 --> 00:13:53,207
- You keep out of the way.
195
00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:55,207
- I'll have to get the key from my father.
196
00:13:55,208 --> 00:13:56,042
- Oh.
197
00:13:56,042 --> 00:13:56,875
You're a darling-
198
00:13:56,876 --> 00:13:59,041
- Get back in the bleeding bushes!
199
00:13:59,042 --> 00:14:00,957
- Would you moderate
your language, Hoskins!
200
00:14:00,958 --> 00:14:02,124
- I'll give the pair of them language.
201
00:14:02,125 --> 00:14:03,457
(speaking foreign language)
202
00:14:03,458 --> 00:14:06,208
You can piss off-ski for a start.
203
00:14:11,167 --> 00:14:12,167
- Daddy?
204
00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:15,750
Daddy!
205
00:14:16,833 --> 00:14:17,667
Daddy!
206
00:14:17,668 --> 00:14:19,582
- What is it?
- Oh!
207
00:14:19,583 --> 00:14:22,166
Um, have you got the keys for the car?
208
00:14:22,167 --> 00:14:24,291
Um, I want to put it
in the garage for you.
209
00:14:24,292 --> 00:14:25,332
- That's okay, darling.
210
00:14:25,333 --> 00:14:26,167
I'm just off.
211
00:14:26,168 --> 00:14:27,416
- Off?
212
00:14:27,417 --> 00:14:28,417
- I told you.
213
00:14:28,418 --> 00:14:29,917
I'm going fishing.
214
00:14:30,750 --> 00:14:33,249
- Are you, are you
taking the car with you?
215
00:14:33,250 --> 00:14:35,082
- Yes.
- No!
216
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:37,124
Um, no, you must walk
217
00:14:37,125 --> 00:14:39,916
to the river, do you good.
218
00:14:39,917 --> 00:14:40,792
- 15 miles?
219
00:14:40,792 --> 00:14:41,625
- Oh, yes.
220
00:14:41,625 --> 00:14:42,458
Marvellous.
221
00:14:42,459 --> 00:14:44,291
- Don't be ridiculous.
222
00:14:44,292 --> 00:14:45,208
If you mother gets back
223
00:14:45,209 --> 00:14:47,457
before I do, tell her not to wait up.
224
00:14:47,458 --> 00:14:49,749
- Um, you need a fishing hat.
225
00:14:49,750 --> 00:14:51,207
It's in the study, I think.
226
00:14:51,208 --> 00:14:52,083
- I don't know whether I do.
227
00:14:52,084 --> 00:14:55,041
- No, you have got to have a fishing hat.
228
00:14:55,042 --> 00:14:56,042
- Must I?
229
00:14:56,042 --> 00:14:56,875
- Yes.
230
00:14:56,876 --> 00:14:59,874
- I don't need-
- I need your car keys.
231
00:14:59,875 --> 00:15:01,291
So I can start the engine
232
00:15:01,292 --> 00:15:03,291
and you can get away really quickly.
233
00:15:03,292 --> 00:15:05,082
- Have you been at Hoskins' homemade wine?
234
00:15:05,083 --> 00:15:06,124
- Find your hat.
235
00:15:06,125 --> 00:15:07,125
-Uh-
236
00:15:09,583 --> 00:15:11,333
- Is everything okay?
237
00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:17,874
- Get him out of Father's boot
238
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,999
and away as soon as possible.
239
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,207
There.
240
00:15:21,208 --> 00:15:22,457
Good luck.
241
00:15:22,458 --> 00:15:25,208
- Nancy, I, I can't find my, my-
242
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:29,124
Who's that?
243
00:15:29,125 --> 00:15:30,707
- Hoskins.
244
00:15:30,708 --> 00:15:31,583
- Hoskins?
245
00:15:31,584 --> 00:15:32,749
(sniffs)
246
00:15:32,750 --> 00:15:35,374
He's wearing a very expensive perfume.
247
00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:36,457
- Yes.
248
00:15:36,458 --> 00:15:37,499
(sniffs)
249
00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:38,791
Very nice.
250
00:15:38,792 --> 00:15:40,416
- He stayed with me for 20 years.
251
00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:41,874
I've never noticed it before.
252
00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:43,082
- Well, never mind about that.
253
00:15:43,083 --> 00:15:44,832
Now where is your hat?
254
00:15:44,833 --> 00:15:47,124
- I just remembered, I left it in the,
255
00:15:47,125 --> 00:15:48,375
in the kitchen.
256
00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:53,250
- That was close.
257
00:15:56,167 --> 00:15:57,750
- You're a darling.
258
00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:01,416
- Who was that?
259
00:16:01,417 --> 00:16:02,541
- What?
260
00:16:02,542 --> 00:16:03,666
- Oh.
261
00:16:03,667 --> 00:16:04,999
Hoskins again.
262
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,000
Well, I'm off.
263
00:16:06,001 --> 00:16:07,457
- Uh, Father.
264
00:16:07,458 --> 00:16:08,541
- What?
265
00:16:08,542 --> 00:16:10,999
- Have you got everything?
266
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:11,833
- Well, I did have-
267
00:16:11,834 --> 00:16:12,957
- Are you sure?
268
00:16:12,958 --> 00:16:13,833
- Yes.
269
00:16:13,833 --> 00:16:14,667
- Bait?
270
00:16:14,668 --> 00:16:15,957
- Yes, yes.
271
00:16:15,958 --> 00:16:16,958
- Flies?
272
00:16:16,959 --> 00:16:18,082
-Hm?
273
00:16:18,083 --> 00:16:19,291
Oh.
274
00:16:19,292 --> 00:16:20,416
Yes, flies.
275
00:16:20,417 --> 00:16:23,374
I've got-
- You need a scarf.
276
00:16:23,375 --> 00:16:24,541
- [Commander] No, it's all right.
277
00:16:24,542 --> 00:16:25,958
Really, I'm fine.
278
00:16:29,542 --> 00:16:30,666
- No.
279
00:16:30,667 --> 00:16:31,916
No.
280
00:16:31,917 --> 00:16:33,957
You've got to have a scarf.
281
00:16:33,958 --> 00:16:35,082
- Oh?
282
00:16:35,083 --> 00:16:36,250
I don't wanna-
283
00:16:37,667 --> 00:16:39,874
- Oh, my poor darling!
284
00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:40,999
Oh!
285
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:44,667
(speaking foreign language)
286
00:16:48,125 --> 00:16:50,791
- Bloody nightmare this is.
287
00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:51,750
- You need a pipe.
288
00:16:51,750 --> 00:16:52,583
-Do I?
289
00:16:52,583 --> 00:16:53,583
Oh.
290
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,916
- I've, uh, got to look after you.
291
00:16:57,917 --> 00:16:59,249
- Very nice.
292
00:16:59,250 --> 00:17:00,250
Hm.
293
00:17:01,208 --> 00:17:02,416
- Now, look, Miss Nancy.
294
00:17:02,417 --> 00:17:03,791
Oh, excuse me, sir.
295
00:17:03,792 --> 00:17:05,249
- What is it you want, Hoskins?
296
00:17:05,250 --> 00:17:07,416
- I want to see Miss Nancy.
297
00:17:07,417 --> 00:17:09,082
- Can I leave now?
298
00:17:09,083 --> 00:17:10,749
- Can he?
299
00:17:10,750 --> 00:17:11,750
- Yes.
300
00:17:12,750 --> 00:17:13,750
- Thank you.
301
00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:19,500
(sniffing)
302
00:17:26,250 --> 00:17:27,332
- Look, that blonde bit
303
00:17:27,333 --> 00:17:29,041
has taken the Russkie
down past my cottage.
304
00:17:29,042 --> 00:17:30,042
- It'll be all right.
305
00:17:30,043 --> 00:17:31,207
They'll be gone in a moment.
306
00:17:31,208 --> 00:17:32,332
- I don't care.
307
00:17:32,333 --> 00:17:33,167
I'm not having this place
308
00:17:33,168 --> 00:17:35,250
turned into a political asylum.
309
00:17:38,542 --> 00:17:41,582
(suspenseful orchestral music)
310
00:17:41,583 --> 00:17:45,250
(speaking foreign language)
311
00:17:48,958 --> 00:17:50,457
- Oh!
312
00:17:50,458 --> 00:17:51,458
Oh.
313
00:17:55,583 --> 00:17:57,416
(speaking foreign language)
314
00:17:57,417 --> 00:18:00,833
(light orchestral music)
315
00:19:03,917 --> 00:19:05,249
- Hello there.
316
00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:09,749
I'm looking for Commander
Rimmington's place.
317
00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:10,916
Rather short signed
318
00:19:10,917 --> 00:19:13,791
in the jolly old country.
319
00:19:13,792 --> 00:19:15,625
Are you local fellows?
320
00:19:16,708 --> 00:19:20,249
Does Commander Rimmington live here?
321
00:19:20,250 --> 00:19:21,791
I said, does Commander
322
00:19:21,792 --> 00:19:23,542
Rimmington live here?
323
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,750
Commander Rimmington?
324
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,000
Commander!
325
00:19:34,042 --> 00:19:35,042
All right.
326
00:19:36,667 --> 00:19:38,207
Happy muck spreading.
327
00:19:38,208 --> 00:19:41,624
(light orchestral music)
328
00:19:41,625 --> 00:19:44,207
- You must be out of
your mind, Miss Nancy.
329
00:19:44,208 --> 00:19:46,957
- Stop being difficult, Hoskins.
330
00:19:46,958 --> 00:19:47,875
They're staying here
331
00:19:47,876 --> 00:19:49,707
until we've decided what to do.
332
00:19:49,708 --> 00:19:50,583
- Oh, you're a darling.
333
00:19:50,584 --> 00:19:52,041
(speaking foreign language)
334
00:19:52,042 --> 00:19:53,541
Hardly speaks a word of English.
335
00:19:53,542 --> 00:19:54,542
Mind you, darling,
336
00:19:54,543 --> 00:19:55,916
he makes up for it in other ways.
337
00:19:55,917 --> 00:19:56,875
- Bloody Russian.
338
00:19:56,876 --> 00:19:57,958
- Here, safe.
339
00:19:59,333 --> 00:20:00,541
Safe.
340
00:20:00,542 --> 00:20:02,375
Miss Rimmington, safe.
341
00:20:05,833 --> 00:20:06,833
- Ah!
342
00:20:12,583 --> 00:20:13,749
- Oh, I say.
343
00:20:13,750 --> 00:20:15,124
I'm honoured.
344
00:20:15,125 --> 00:20:16,624
Absolutely honoured.
345
00:20:16,625 --> 00:20:18,041
(speaking foreign language)
346
00:20:18,042 --> 00:20:20,291
- He's a sweetie, isn't he?
347
00:20:20,292 --> 00:20:22,499
- Oh, no, don't stop.
348
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:24,874
(speaking foreign language)
349
00:20:24,875 --> 00:20:26,207
What did he say?
350
00:20:26,208 --> 00:20:29,916
- Sounded dead sexy, whatever it was.
351
00:20:29,917 --> 00:20:30,917
- Ah!
352
00:20:33,250 --> 00:20:35,582
- Get that twit down.
353
00:20:35,583 --> 00:20:36,832
- Quick.
354
00:20:36,833 --> 00:20:38,541
Take him up to the attic.
355
00:20:38,542 --> 00:20:41,166
I'll go and see who it is.
356
00:20:41,167 --> 00:20:42,582
Oh, no, not now.
357
00:20:42,583 --> 00:20:43,583
Later.
358
00:20:43,583 --> 00:20:44,417
Upstairs attic.
359
00:20:44,418 --> 00:20:45,957
(speaking foreign language)
360
00:20:45,958 --> 00:20:47,124
- Rudi!
361
00:20:47,125 --> 00:20:48,374
You upstairs.
362
00:20:48,375 --> 00:20:49,375
You and me.
363
00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:54,374
(speaking foreign language)
364
00:20:54,375 --> 00:20:55,292
- He's a blooming sex maniac.
365
00:20:55,293 --> 00:20:56,791
(knocking)
366
00:20:56,792 --> 00:20:58,166
I'm just, uh, gonna
367
00:20:58,167 --> 00:20:59,416
look after my compost heap.
368
00:20:59,417 --> 00:21:01,332
- What about me?
369
00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:04,666
- I think you're in it already.
370
00:21:04,667 --> 00:21:08,916
(speaking foreign language)
371
00:21:08,917 --> 00:21:10,207
- Calm down, Rudi.
372
00:21:10,208 --> 00:21:11,208
- Ah!
373
00:21:11,917 --> 00:21:15,124
(speaking foreign language)
374
00:21:15,125 --> 00:21:16,582
Okay, don't get your knickers in a twist.
375
00:21:16,583 --> 00:21:17,417
- What's happening?
376
00:21:17,418 --> 00:21:19,207
- He's have a tiny temperament, darling.
377
00:21:19,208 --> 00:21:20,958
He's a star, you see.
378
00:21:23,167 --> 00:21:24,666
(knocking)
379
00:21:24,667 --> 00:21:25,999
- Back upstairs!
380
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,291
(speaking foreign language)
381
00:21:28,292 --> 00:21:29,292
- Yes, all right.
382
00:21:29,293 --> 00:21:32,249
I think he's trying to
say the attic's too small.
383
00:21:32,250 --> 00:21:33,666
- What are you trying to do up there?
384
00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:34,832
- It's his practise time.
385
00:21:34,833 --> 00:21:36,832
He needs a lot of space.
386
00:21:36,833 --> 00:21:40,500
(speaking foreign language)
387
00:21:47,542 --> 00:21:48,582
Anybody at home?
388
00:21:48,583 --> 00:21:49,458
- Ha!
389
00:21:49,458 --> 00:21:50,292
Hm!
390
00:21:50,293 --> 00:21:53,958
(speaking foreign language)
391
00:21:56,625 --> 00:21:58,416
- How do you do?
392
00:21:58,417 --> 00:22:00,291
- How nice to see you, Gerry.
393
00:22:00,292 --> 00:22:01,707
- Yes, yes!
394
00:22:01,708 --> 00:22:02,542
-Yes?
395
00:22:02,542 --> 00:22:03,542
- Ah!
396
00:22:07,250 --> 00:22:09,499
- How do you do?
397
00:22:09,500 --> 00:22:10,749
Mr. Buss.
398
00:22:10,750 --> 00:22:11,791
- Is Mr. Buss one of us?
399
00:22:11,792 --> 00:22:13,166
- Oh, yes.
400
00:22:13,167 --> 00:22:14,916
- It's all right, he's a friend.
401
00:22:14,917 --> 00:22:17,874
Uh, him (speaking foreign language).
402
00:22:17,875 --> 00:22:18,792
(speaking foreign language)
403
00:22:18,792 --> 00:22:19,625
- Ah!
404
00:22:19,626 --> 00:22:23,292
(speaking foreign language)
405
00:22:24,833 --> 00:22:26,082
- Good heavens.
406
00:22:26,083 --> 00:22:27,624
(speaking foreign language)
407
00:22:27,625 --> 00:22:28,458
No, no!
408
00:22:28,458 --> 00:22:29,417
Not again.
409
00:22:29,418 --> 00:22:30,832
Nancy, he's speaking Russian.
410
00:22:30,833 --> 00:22:33,416
- Does the name Rudi
Petrovyan mean anything.
411
00:22:33,417 --> 00:22:34,250
- Ha!
412
00:22:34,251 --> 00:22:35,749
Petrovyan!
413
00:22:35,750 --> 00:22:36,750
- Again!
414
00:22:37,875 --> 00:22:40,916
(speaking foreign language)
415
00:22:40,917 --> 00:22:41,750
- No, no!
416
00:22:41,751 --> 00:22:42,957
You must not make
417
00:22:42,958 --> 00:22:44,082
a mealy mealy out of me.
418
00:22:44,083 --> 00:22:45,083
- Ah!
419
00:22:46,083 --> 00:22:49,583
- Nancy, he's not only speaking Russian...
420
00:22:56,667 --> 00:22:58,082
He flees.
421
00:22:58,083 --> 00:22:59,666
- Yes.
422
00:22:59,667 --> 00:23:01,416
- Barbara no-bra?
423
00:23:01,417 --> 00:23:02,417
- Yes.
424
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,041
- This is terrible.
425
00:23:07,042 --> 00:23:08,082
What are they doing here?
426
00:23:08,083 --> 00:23:09,332
- Never mind.
427
00:23:09,333 --> 00:23:11,332
The point is we're going to help them.
428
00:23:11,333 --> 00:23:13,374
- We most certainly are not.
429
00:23:13,375 --> 00:23:16,166
It'll be a serious
embarrassment to out government.
430
00:23:16,167 --> 00:23:18,791
The Russian foreign
minister's due here next week.
431
00:23:18,792 --> 00:23:19,916
You needn't think you're going
432
00:23:19,917 --> 00:23:21,832
to get political asylum here, you know.
433
00:23:21,833 --> 00:23:23,416
- Bravo, bravo!
434
00:23:23,417 --> 00:23:24,292
(smacks kiss)
435
00:23:24,292 --> 00:23:25,292
- Stop that.
436
00:23:26,458 --> 00:23:28,707
Everybody will be looking for them.
437
00:23:28,708 --> 00:23:29,749
Our special branch,
438
00:23:29,750 --> 00:23:30,583
Russian security officers.
439
00:23:30,583 --> 00:23:31,417
- They've already found us.
440
00:23:31,417 --> 00:23:32,250
They're waiting on the lane.
441
00:23:32,251 --> 00:23:34,499
- There you are, they're
waiting in the lane.
442
00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:36,999
I thought they were yokels.
443
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:38,041
They've seen me.
444
00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,582
Me, a PA to the PPS to the PM.
445
00:23:40,583 --> 00:23:41,791
We'll just have to hand him over.
446
00:23:41,792 --> 00:23:42,625
(speaking foreign language)
447
00:23:42,625 --> 00:23:43,458
Shut up!
448
00:23:43,458 --> 00:23:44,292
- Ah!
449
00:23:44,292 --> 00:23:45,167
Bravo, bravo!
450
00:23:45,168 --> 00:23:46,707
- Get rid of him while we discuss this.
451
00:23:46,708 --> 00:23:49,041
- Oh, I'm so pleased you're going to help.
452
00:23:49,042 --> 00:23:50,082
- I'm not helping!
453
00:23:50,083 --> 00:23:52,582
- You, upstairs, attic.
454
00:23:52,583 --> 00:23:55,499
(speaking foreign language)
455
00:23:55,500 --> 00:23:56,500
- I beg your pardon?
456
00:23:56,501 --> 00:23:57,541
(speaking foreign language)
457
00:23:57,542 --> 00:23:59,832
- I'll look it up in my
English-Russian dictionary.
458
00:23:59,833 --> 00:24:01,874
- You, clear off.
459
00:24:01,875 --> 00:24:03,791
(speaking foreign language)
460
00:24:03,792 --> 00:24:06,082
Never mind "Jackie pull the chain".
461
00:24:06,083 --> 00:24:07,250
You, upstairs.
462
00:24:08,667 --> 00:24:11,833
Miss Rimmington will take you upstairs
463
00:24:12,875 --> 00:24:14,124
for five minutes.
464
00:24:14,125 --> 00:24:15,125
- Ay-yi-yi!
465
00:24:16,542 --> 00:24:17,707
- Steady, steady.
466
00:24:17,708 --> 00:24:18,708
You upstairs.
467
00:24:18,708 --> 00:24:19,667
(speaking foreign language)
468
00:24:19,668 --> 00:24:20,707
- I think I've got it.
469
00:24:20,708 --> 00:24:22,291
- Ah!
470
00:24:22,292 --> 00:24:26,042
(speaking foreign language)
471
00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:30,250
- "Claus-trop-hobia!"
472
00:24:32,583 --> 00:24:33,583
- That's English?
473
00:24:33,584 --> 00:24:34,957
Claus-drop-hobia?
474
00:24:34,958 --> 00:24:36,624
- Claustrophobia.
475
00:24:36,625 --> 00:24:39,374
He's had it in the attic.
476
00:24:39,375 --> 00:24:40,999
- Too bad.
477
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,457
You, upstairs.
478
00:24:42,458 --> 00:24:43,666
- Claustrophobia.
479
00:24:43,667 --> 00:24:44,500
- You, Siberia.
480
00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:45,500
- No!
481
00:24:48,500 --> 00:24:49,333
- Right.
482
00:24:49,334 --> 00:24:51,041
Let's discuss this calmly and quietly.
483
00:24:51,042 --> 00:24:52,416
- Good idea.
484
00:24:52,417 --> 00:24:54,416
I'll put the kettle on.
485
00:24:54,417 --> 00:24:58,541
- And you come and tell
us how you like it.
486
00:24:58,542 --> 00:25:01,958
(light orchestral music)
487
00:25:28,167 --> 00:25:30,999
- I don't care how romantic
Petrovyan's story is.
488
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:32,207
- Can't you see,
489
00:25:32,208 --> 00:25:33,749
every night when he's supposed
490
00:25:33,750 --> 00:25:35,499
to be asleep in his hotel,
491
00:25:35,500 --> 00:25:37,041
Russian security guards
492
00:25:37,042 --> 00:25:38,999
out in the hall, there's Rudi
493
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,082
climbing down the drain pipe.
494
00:25:41,083 --> 00:25:42,124
- Wish he had broken his neck.
495
00:25:42,125 --> 00:25:43,166
- Just so that he can spend
496
00:25:43,167 --> 00:25:46,291
a few hours watching his beloved dance.
497
00:25:46,292 --> 00:25:48,291
- It was my specialty that got him.
498
00:25:48,292 --> 00:25:50,458
(humming)
499
00:25:51,500 --> 00:25:52,624
I can make one boob
500
00:25:52,625 --> 00:25:53,791
go one way, and one the other.
501
00:25:53,792 --> 00:25:54,708
Would you like to see?
502
00:25:54,709 --> 00:25:56,374
- Sounds absolutely, certainly not.
503
00:25:56,375 --> 00:25:58,999
(tea kettle whistles)
504
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,124
The only thing I want to see
505
00:26:00,125 --> 00:26:02,541
is the back of that fellow up there.
506
00:26:02,542 --> 00:26:04,249
- How do you like it, Barbara?
507
00:26:04,250 --> 00:26:05,666
- As it comes, please, Nancy.
508
00:26:05,667 --> 00:26:06,874
- What a pair.
509
00:26:06,875 --> 00:26:08,291
- Saucy, Mr. Buss.
510
00:26:08,292 --> 00:26:10,291
- Here we are then.
511
00:26:10,292 --> 00:26:11,374
- Nancy?
512
00:26:11,375 --> 00:26:12,208
-Hm?
513
00:26:12,209 --> 00:26:13,624
- You, sit there.
514
00:26:13,625 --> 00:26:15,249
- You are masterful.
515
00:26:15,250 --> 00:26:16,250
Thank you.
516
00:26:18,167 --> 00:26:19,541
- We can either hand Petrovyan
517
00:26:19,542 --> 00:26:21,957
over to those Russian embassy
officials, or we can telephone
518
00:26:21,958 --> 00:26:23,499
the local police.
519
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:24,582
- Do you realise you haven't
520
00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:26,624
even said hello properly, Gerry?
521
00:26:26,625 --> 00:26:27,625
- Hello, properly Gerry.
522
00:26:27,626 --> 00:26:28,749
Now-
- And my Kiss.
523
00:26:28,750 --> 00:26:29,874
- Here, Miss Nancy.
524
00:26:29,875 --> 00:26:31,499
No time for that now.
525
00:26:31,500 --> 00:26:32,874
There's a fellow just got out
526
00:26:32,875 --> 00:26:35,166
of a taxi, and he, who are you?
527
00:26:35,167 --> 00:26:36,374
- He's Mr. Buss.
528
00:26:36,375 --> 00:26:38,124
- He should have come by taxi too.
529
00:26:38,125 --> 00:26:39,332
- I'm a friend of Miss Rimmington's.
530
00:26:39,333 --> 00:26:40,250
- Oh, good.
531
00:26:40,251 --> 00:26:41,582
You're the accomplice now.
532
00:26:41,583 --> 00:26:42,417
- No!
533
00:26:42,418 --> 00:26:44,667
(knocking)
534
00:26:48,625 --> 00:26:51,582
- Oh, please, you will help us, Gerry.
535
00:26:51,583 --> 00:26:53,249
- What are you doing down here?
536
00:26:53,250 --> 00:26:56,332
(speaking foreign language)
537
00:26:56,333 --> 00:26:57,541
Get back upstairs!
538
00:26:57,542 --> 00:26:59,082
(knocking)
539
00:26:59,083 --> 00:27:00,374
(speaking foreign language)
540
00:27:00,375 --> 00:27:02,791
- Shut your great, big, Russian cakehole.
541
00:27:02,792 --> 00:27:04,582
- Whoever it is, get rid of them.
542
00:27:04,583 --> 00:27:05,417
- Me?
543
00:27:05,417 --> 00:27:06,417
- Yes, say everybody's out.
544
00:27:06,417 --> 00:27:07,292
Pretend you don't understand.
545
00:27:07,293 --> 00:27:08,332
Pretend you're daft and deaf.
546
00:27:08,333 --> 00:27:09,167
- Daft and what?
547
00:27:09,167 --> 00:27:10,000
- Deaf!
548
00:27:10,001 --> 00:27:12,166
Nancy, come help me.
549
00:27:12,167 --> 00:27:12,958
You, upstairs!
550
00:27:12,959 --> 00:27:14,666
We're gonna play lovely games with you.
551
00:27:14,667 --> 00:27:15,791
- What games?
552
00:27:15,792 --> 00:27:17,375
- Russian roulette.
553
00:27:23,917 --> 00:27:25,749
(knocking)
554
00:27:25,750 --> 00:27:26,750
- Oh, God.
555
00:27:31,542 --> 00:27:32,749
- I've been knocking forever.
556
00:27:32,750 --> 00:27:33,750
- That's no good.
557
00:27:33,751 --> 00:27:35,500
Ever don't live here.
558
00:27:36,875 --> 00:27:39,124
- Can I see Commander Rimmington?
559
00:27:39,125 --> 00:27:41,374
- I don't think so.
560
00:27:41,375 --> 00:27:43,249
- Commander Rimmington, where is he?
561
00:27:43,250 --> 00:27:44,624
- He's out.
562
00:27:44,625 --> 00:27:46,332
- Blast it!
563
00:27:46,333 --> 00:27:47,208
- I'll wait.
564
00:27:47,209 --> 00:27:48,291
- No, no.
565
00:27:48,292 --> 00:27:49,457
You can't do that.
566
00:27:49,458 --> 00:27:50,707
- I most certainly can.
567
00:27:50,708 --> 00:27:52,541
This is imperative.
568
00:27:52,542 --> 00:27:53,957
- "Go directly to jail, do not pass go,
569
00:27:53,958 --> 00:27:55,708
do not collect $200."
570
00:28:03,417 --> 00:28:04,582
Mivi?
571
00:28:04,583 --> 00:28:05,583
- MI6.
572
00:28:06,250 --> 00:28:09,249
- MI-
- Government security.
573
00:28:09,250 --> 00:28:11,082
How long will the commander be?
574
00:28:11,083 --> 00:28:12,207
- Oh, I don't know.
575
00:28:12,208 --> 00:28:14,708
I think, I think he might, he,
576
00:28:15,833 --> 00:28:16,833
oh, God.
577
00:28:25,667 --> 00:28:29,083
(light orchestral music)
578
00:28:57,625 --> 00:28:58,916
- No time for games.
579
00:28:58,917 --> 00:29:00,166
(laughs)
580
00:29:00,167 --> 00:29:01,125
- Madam.
581
00:29:01,125 --> 00:29:01,958
- Oh, dear.
582
00:29:01,958 --> 00:29:02,958
I'm sorry.
583
00:29:02,959 --> 00:29:04,999
I thought I recognised you.
584
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:09,874
- I've come urgently to
see Commander Rimmington.
585
00:29:09,875 --> 00:29:10,875
- Oh, dear.
586
00:29:10,876 --> 00:29:12,874
I mean, oh, dear, he's out at the moment.
587
00:29:12,875 --> 00:29:13,875
- So I gather.
588
00:29:13,876 --> 00:29:15,166
May I ask who you are?
589
00:29:15,167 --> 00:29:16,499
- Yes, of course, darling.
590
00:29:16,500 --> 00:29:17,874
Don't you know Mrs. Rimmington?
591
00:29:17,875 --> 00:29:19,499
- I know neither the
commander nor his wife.
592
00:29:19,500 --> 00:29:20,749
- I'm the commander's wife.
593
00:29:20,750 --> 00:29:21,583
Isn't it?
594
00:29:21,584 --> 00:29:23,124
I'll tell the commander you called.
595
00:29:23,125 --> 00:29:24,291
- Mrs. Rimmington, please,
596
00:29:24,292 --> 00:29:26,582
I'll wait till the commander returns.
597
00:29:26,583 --> 00:29:29,291
- Why not just leave a message, darling?
598
00:29:29,292 --> 00:29:30,292
- No, no.
599
00:29:31,500 --> 00:29:32,375
- Excuse me, sir.
600
00:29:32,375 --> 00:29:33,208
- Oh.
601
00:29:33,209 --> 00:29:35,999
- Are you definitely going
to insist on waiting here?
602
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,207
- Yes, definitely.
603
00:29:38,208 --> 00:29:39,999
- All right.
604
00:29:40,000 --> 00:29:41,916
- Much safer to leave a message.
605
00:29:41,917 --> 00:29:44,249
- No, it's far too big.
606
00:29:44,250 --> 00:29:45,417
Too important.
607
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:50,207
- Don't be difficult, Gerry!
608
00:29:50,208 --> 00:29:51,707
You look smashing!
609
00:29:51,708 --> 00:29:53,291
- He'll know I'm not the commander!
610
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:54,624
- He's never met him!
611
00:29:54,625 --> 00:29:56,291
Now get down there!
612
00:29:56,292 --> 00:29:57,457
- What I have to say is for
613
00:29:57,458 --> 00:30:00,124
the commander's ears alone.
614
00:30:00,125 --> 00:30:01,125
- Why me?
615
00:30:01,875 --> 00:30:02,999
- Love!
616
00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:05,582
Barbara and Rudi love each other.
617
00:30:05,583 --> 00:30:06,957
- What has that got to do with me?
618
00:30:06,958 --> 00:30:08,541
- Love then.
619
00:30:08,542 --> 00:30:10,041
You love me, don't you?
620
00:30:10,042 --> 00:30:11,416
And I love you.
621
00:30:11,417 --> 00:30:13,374
(grunts)
622
00:30:13,375 --> 00:30:14,499
- Do you really?
623
00:30:14,500 --> 00:30:16,041
- Oh, yes.
624
00:30:16,042 --> 00:30:17,082
- I love you too.
625
00:30:17,083 --> 00:30:18,667
Now get down there!
626
00:30:19,958 --> 00:30:24,875
(grunting)
(bell ringing)
627
00:30:29,458 --> 00:30:32,124
(grunting)
628
00:30:32,125 --> 00:30:34,708
(bell ringing)
629
00:30:39,750 --> 00:30:41,541
- Look out, Hoskins.
630
00:30:41,542 --> 00:30:45,457
- Aye, aye, Commander Rimmington, sir.
631
00:30:45,458 --> 00:30:47,707
It was the submarine.
632
00:30:47,708 --> 00:30:49,125
- Welcome aboard.
633
00:30:50,292 --> 00:30:51,542
Bit of a swell.
634
00:30:56,625 --> 00:30:58,666
- My name's Laver.
635
00:30:58,667 --> 00:30:59,874
- Security.
636
00:30:59,875 --> 00:31:01,207
Jolly good.
637
00:31:01,208 --> 00:31:02,832
- Can I see you alone, Commander?
638
00:31:02,833 --> 00:31:03,667
This, um,
639
00:31:03,668 --> 00:31:05,707
this isn't even for your wife's ears.
640
00:31:05,708 --> 00:31:07,249
- I understand.
641
00:31:07,250 --> 00:31:08,624
I don't understand.
642
00:31:08,625 --> 00:31:11,041
- I'll go, my dearest darling.
643
00:31:11,042 --> 00:31:12,457
- Why are you-
644
00:31:12,458 --> 00:31:14,124
- I'm your wife, you fool.
645
00:31:14,125 --> 00:31:15,666
- She's my wife, you fool.
646
00:31:15,667 --> 00:31:16,500
We've been apart so long
647
00:31:16,501 --> 00:31:18,082
it's bigger than both of us.
648
00:31:18,083 --> 00:31:20,874
- Is there anything I
can get you, darling?
649
00:31:20,875 --> 00:31:22,249
- No thank you.
650
00:31:22,250 --> 00:31:24,457
- Anything you fancy, Mr. Laver?
651
00:31:24,458 --> 00:31:25,832
- No, thank you.
652
00:31:25,833 --> 00:31:27,791
- How about some tea, my little Jack Tar?
653
00:31:27,792 --> 00:31:28,625
- Tea?
654
00:31:28,625 --> 00:31:29,458
Ta-ta.
655
00:31:29,458 --> 00:31:30,333
- I know how you like it.
656
00:31:30,334 --> 00:31:31,916
- Yes.
657
00:31:31,917 --> 00:31:33,791
She knows how I like it.
658
00:31:33,792 --> 00:31:35,832
- A nice cup of tea, Mr. Laver?
659
00:31:35,833 --> 00:31:37,291
- Very well, thank you.
660
00:31:37,292 --> 00:31:38,125
- Sugar?
661
00:31:38,126 --> 00:31:39,499
- Two lumps.
662
00:31:39,500 --> 00:31:40,333
- Milk?
663
00:31:40,333 --> 00:31:41,333
- No, no.
664
00:31:42,833 --> 00:31:45,249
(giggles)
665
00:31:45,250 --> 00:31:47,124
May we get down to business, Commander?
666
00:31:47,125 --> 00:31:48,000
- Of course.
667
00:31:48,001 --> 00:31:51,166
- There was a very nasty
stink in Whitehall today.
668
00:31:51,167 --> 00:31:52,874
Fortunately, there was
no suggestion that I
669
00:31:52,875 --> 00:31:53,875
was responsible for it.
670
00:31:53,875 --> 00:31:54,708
- I'm glad.
671
00:31:54,709 --> 00:31:55,832
- However, the minister spent
672
00:31:55,833 --> 00:31:57,207
a very unpleasant half hour
673
00:31:57,208 --> 00:31:58,249
with the Russian ambassador.
674
00:31:58,250 --> 00:31:59,083
(stammering)
675
00:31:59,084 --> 00:32:00,624
About this Petrovyan fellow.
676
00:32:00,625 --> 00:32:03,457
(stammering)
677
00:32:03,458 --> 00:32:04,499
The minister has sent you
678
00:32:04,500 --> 00:32:06,999
an information signal.
679
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,833
- Shouldn't have bothered, really.
680
00:32:10,917 --> 00:32:13,917
Just wait one tiny, nautical moment.
681
00:32:17,125 --> 00:32:20,208
Have that back, it may come in handy.
682
00:32:26,625 --> 00:32:28,874
Clearly, but this is ridiculous.
683
00:32:28,875 --> 00:32:31,874
(speaking gibberish)
684
00:32:31,875 --> 00:32:33,666
I can't make head nor tail of this.
685
00:32:33,667 --> 00:32:35,249
- You will when you've decoded it.
686
00:32:35,250 --> 00:32:37,124
- Decoded it?
687
00:32:37,125 --> 00:32:38,832
- As you can see, sir, it's 4ABF.
688
00:32:38,833 --> 00:32:40,249
- Language.
689
00:32:40,250 --> 00:32:42,666
- 4ABF coded, top secret.
690
00:32:42,667 --> 00:32:43,583
- Coded top secret?
691
00:32:43,583 --> 00:32:44,417
That's splendid.
692
00:32:44,418 --> 00:32:45,666
Have a pleasant journey back to town.
693
00:32:45,667 --> 00:32:46,791
- Really, Commander.
694
00:32:46,792 --> 00:32:49,124
Surely, you're conversant
with BF procedure?
695
00:32:49,125 --> 00:32:50,125
- Intimately.
696
00:32:50,125 --> 00:32:50,958
But until you've gone,
697
00:32:50,959 --> 00:32:52,166
I can't decode the BF message.
698
00:32:52,167 --> 00:32:53,000
Can I?
699
00:32:53,001 --> 00:32:54,249
- BF procedure, Commander.
700
00:32:54,250 --> 00:32:56,957
You decode the information
signal, study it, reply
701
00:32:56,958 --> 00:32:58,332
immediately, and then
702
00:32:58,333 --> 00:33:01,499
get rid of it in the usual way.
703
00:33:01,500 --> 00:33:03,166
- Yes.
704
00:33:03,167 --> 00:33:04,666
Tell you what, Laver.
705
00:33:04,667 --> 00:33:06,582
I'll get down to this decoding business,
706
00:33:06,583 --> 00:33:07,999
while you take a pleasant,
707
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:09,082
little stroll in the garden.
708
00:33:09,083 --> 00:33:09,917
- Very well, sir.
709
00:33:09,918 --> 00:33:11,457
But time is of the essence.
710
00:33:11,458 --> 00:33:12,292
- Don't worry.
711
00:33:12,293 --> 00:33:14,957
I'm the fastest BF
decoder in the business.
712
00:33:14,958 --> 00:33:16,958
Look out for the gnomes.
713
00:33:18,167 --> 00:33:19,707
Nancy!
714
00:33:19,708 --> 00:33:20,583
Miss Wilcox!
715
00:33:20,583 --> 00:33:21,417
- Kettle's clogging up.
716
00:33:21,417 --> 00:33:22,417
- Yes, so is everything else.
717
00:33:22,418 --> 00:33:24,000
- Well done, Gerry.
718
00:33:25,083 --> 00:33:25,917
Has he gone?
719
00:33:25,917 --> 00:33:26,708
- No, he hasn't.
720
00:33:26,709 --> 00:33:27,999
He's out there and he's
brought this coded message
721
00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:29,791
for your father all about him!
722
00:33:29,792 --> 00:33:31,999
You'll have to go!
723
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:33,707
(wheezing)
724
00:33:33,708 --> 00:33:34,957
Don't do that!
725
00:33:34,958 --> 00:33:37,208
(wheezing)
726
00:33:39,708 --> 00:33:41,166
The suspense is killing us.
727
00:33:41,167 --> 00:33:43,832
(wheezing)
728
00:33:43,833 --> 00:33:45,332
- We're all gonna be shot!
729
00:33:45,333 --> 00:33:46,167
- Shot?
730
00:33:46,167 --> 00:33:47,167
- There's two blokes down by
731
00:33:47,168 --> 00:33:49,166
my cottage talking all "ski" and "ich."
732
00:33:49,167 --> 00:33:53,083
(suspenseful orchestral music)
733
00:34:00,292 --> 00:34:02,207
- We know all about those two.
734
00:34:02,208 --> 00:34:04,832
They're Russian security men.
735
00:34:04,833 --> 00:34:06,166
- You wretched fellow.
736
00:34:06,167 --> 00:34:07,374
- Yes.
737
00:34:07,375 --> 00:34:08,375
- I'll tell you what.
738
00:34:08,376 --> 00:34:09,624
Let's hand him over.
739
00:34:09,625 --> 00:34:11,291
- If we hand him over,
Father's bound to be
740
00:34:11,292 --> 00:34:13,207
dragged into it.
741
00:34:13,208 --> 00:34:14,999
- What we gonna do, Mr. Buss?
742
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:15,833
You're in control.
743
00:34:15,833 --> 00:34:16,667
- Far from it.
744
00:34:16,667 --> 00:34:17,500
- Excuse me, Commander.
745
00:34:17,501 --> 00:34:18,667
I wonder if I-
746
00:34:22,458 --> 00:34:25,292
- He's, um-
- He's my hairdresser.
747
00:34:26,833 --> 00:34:28,374
- Well, actually I, um,
748
00:34:28,375 --> 00:34:29,707
I came back for my briefcase.
749
00:34:29,708 --> 00:34:30,542
- Oh.
750
00:34:30,542 --> 00:34:31,542
There it is.
751
00:34:32,542 --> 00:34:34,499
- Your, uh, your hairdresser.
752
00:34:34,500 --> 00:34:35,707
- Yes.
753
00:34:35,708 --> 00:34:36,791
He's lost his grip.
754
00:34:36,792 --> 00:34:37,792
- Your briefcase.
755
00:34:37,793 --> 00:34:39,124
- Thank you.
756
00:34:39,125 --> 00:34:39,958
Oh.
757
00:34:39,959 --> 00:34:41,082
I haven't had the pleasure.
758
00:34:41,083 --> 00:34:44,167
- That's Commander's daughter, Nancy.
759
00:34:48,750 --> 00:34:52,207
- I'm the Commander's daughter's nanny.
760
00:34:52,208 --> 00:34:53,042
- Nanny.
761
00:34:53,042 --> 00:34:53,917
- Yes, the au pair.
762
00:34:53,918 --> 00:34:55,249
I was terribly lucky to get her.
763
00:34:55,250 --> 00:34:57,749
- Yes, my wife's got the
best au pair in the business.
764
00:34:57,750 --> 00:34:59,416
- Nanny.
765
00:34:59,417 --> 00:35:01,166
She looks after our
three or four children.
766
00:35:01,167 --> 00:35:03,624
- Am I still the gardener?
767
00:35:03,625 --> 00:35:04,707
- Tell you what, Laver.
768
00:35:04,708 --> 00:35:05,832
Why don't you go out to the
769
00:35:05,833 --> 00:35:07,082
garden, take a drink with you?
770
00:35:07,083 --> 00:35:07,917
Whiskey?
771
00:35:07,917 --> 00:35:08,750
Gin?
772
00:35:08,751 --> 00:35:10,000
Vodka?
- Vodkal!
773
00:35:11,375 --> 00:35:13,041
- No alcohol, thank you.
774
00:35:13,042 --> 00:35:13,875
- Quite right.
775
00:35:13,875 --> 00:35:14,875
Filthy habit.
776
00:35:14,876 --> 00:35:16,041
Just the garden.
777
00:35:16,042 --> 00:35:17,249
Enjoy the fresh air.
778
00:35:17,250 --> 00:35:19,291
- I suppose I can spare
a few moments to, uh,
779
00:35:19,292 --> 00:35:22,291
sit on the lawn and read my newspaper.
780
00:35:22,292 --> 00:35:24,457
- Is that this evening's newspaper?
781
00:35:24,458 --> 00:35:25,292
- Yes.
782
00:35:25,292 --> 00:35:26,125
- Have you read it?
783
00:35:26,125 --> 00:35:26,958
No.
784
00:35:26,958 --> 00:35:27,792
- Oh.
785
00:35:27,792 --> 00:35:28,792
- Ha!
786
00:35:30,042 --> 00:35:31,375
- What on earth?
787
00:35:32,542 --> 00:35:34,749
- Very temperamental, hairdressers.
788
00:35:34,750 --> 00:35:36,541
- Good Lord.
789
00:35:36,542 --> 00:35:38,166
Commander, may I have my newspaper?
790
00:35:38,167 --> 00:35:39,916
- Of course.
791
00:35:39,917 --> 00:35:40,917
- Thank you.
792
00:35:46,292 --> 00:35:47,875
- Come along, Rudi.
793
00:35:49,667 --> 00:35:52,249
- If he'd seen your
photograph, we've had had it.
794
00:35:52,250 --> 00:35:54,374
- I'm just going down to my cottage.
795
00:35:54,375 --> 00:35:55,916
See if the burial money's under the bed.
796
00:35:55,917 --> 00:35:56,750
- No!
797
00:35:56,751 --> 00:35:57,916
You stay here.
798
00:35:57,917 --> 00:35:59,582
- He won't recognise Rudi.
799
00:35:59,583 --> 00:36:01,124
There's a picture of him in "Swan Lake."
800
00:36:01,125 --> 00:36:01,958
- Ah!
801
00:36:01,959 --> 00:36:04,041
(speaking foreign language)
802
00:36:04,042 --> 00:36:05,042
Ha!
803
00:36:06,458 --> 00:36:07,791
- Will you stop that!
804
00:36:07,792 --> 00:36:08,792
- Ha!
805
00:36:10,292 --> 00:36:11,708
- He's got to go.
806
00:36:12,708 --> 00:36:13,708
Come here!
807
00:36:14,958 --> 00:36:15,958
(humming)
808
00:36:15,959 --> 00:36:17,291
How do you turn him off?
809
00:36:17,292 --> 00:36:18,332
Do something!
810
00:36:18,333 --> 00:36:19,167
- Hey!
811
00:36:19,168 --> 00:36:21,083
- Excuse me, Commander.
812
00:36:27,250 --> 00:36:28,250
- Ha!
813
00:36:31,250 --> 00:36:32,917
- We'll get the tea.
814
00:36:36,917 --> 00:36:38,124
We'll have to fix up Mr. Laver.
815
00:36:38,125 --> 00:36:39,666
Hurry with the tea.
816
00:36:39,667 --> 00:36:41,207
- Fix him?
817
00:36:41,208 --> 00:36:42,875
- This should do it.
818
00:36:44,167 --> 00:36:45,749
- What are they?
819
00:36:45,750 --> 00:36:47,417
- These pick you up.
820
00:36:48,875 --> 00:36:50,875
And these knock you out.
821
00:36:52,292 --> 00:36:53,542
- Good heavens.
822
00:37:03,750 --> 00:37:05,374
Just teaching him the dance
823
00:37:05,375 --> 00:37:07,792
of the Sugarplum Hairdresser.
824
00:37:09,333 --> 00:37:11,499
- May I have the front
page of my newspaper?
825
00:37:11,500 --> 00:37:13,499
- Uh-
- The front page.
826
00:37:13,500 --> 00:37:15,416
- Of-
- Of my newspaper.
827
00:37:15,417 --> 00:37:17,041
- Yes, where is it?
828
00:37:17,042 --> 00:37:18,792
- In your top pocket.
829
00:37:19,667 --> 00:37:20,500
- Teal
830
00:37:20,500 --> 00:37:21,333
- Good heavens!
831
00:37:21,333 --> 00:37:22,167
Tea time!
832
00:37:22,167 --> 00:37:23,167
-Hm?
833
00:37:33,708 --> 00:37:36,374
You're eating my newspaper.
834
00:37:36,375 --> 00:37:37,832
- Yes.
835
00:37:37,833 --> 00:37:39,582
It's tea time.
836
00:37:39,583 --> 00:37:41,417
It's my standard diet.
837
00:38:00,875 --> 00:38:02,416
- Tea, Mr. Laver.
838
00:38:02,417 --> 00:38:03,417
-Hm?
839
00:38:03,418 --> 00:38:04,583
Oh, thank you.
840
00:38:10,708 --> 00:38:11,958
Now, look here.
841
00:38:15,917 --> 00:38:16,917
Splendid cup of tea.
842
00:38:20,458 --> 00:38:22,582
- Are you all right, my dearest?
843
00:38:22,583 --> 00:38:23,791
- Probably finding it a bit
844
00:38:23,792 --> 00:38:25,499
difficult digesting the news.
845
00:38:25,500 --> 00:38:26,916
(laughs)
846
00:38:26,917 --> 00:38:27,833
I'm terribly sorry.
847
00:38:27,834 --> 00:38:28,999
It's just that I've never met anybody
848
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:31,332
before who ate newspapers.
849
00:38:31,333 --> 00:38:32,416
Except bookworms.
850
00:38:32,417 --> 00:38:34,457
(laughs)
851
00:38:34,458 --> 00:38:35,292
Bookworms.
852
00:38:35,293 --> 00:38:36,874
(laughs)
853
00:38:36,875 --> 00:38:37,708
Bookworms!
854
00:38:37,709 --> 00:38:38,916
(swallowing)
855
00:38:38,917 --> 00:38:41,167
(laughing)
856
00:38:42,458 --> 00:38:43,707
- What's come over him?
857
00:38:43,708 --> 00:38:44,832
- Drink and drugs.
858
00:38:44,833 --> 00:38:46,999
- Oh, I enjoyed that, Nanny.
859
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:49,832
I say, I say, Nanny, may I, um,
860
00:38:49,833 --> 00:38:51,374
may I call you Nanny, Nanny?
861
00:38:51,375 --> 00:38:54,666
- Mr. Laver, please don't
be au fait with the au pair.
862
00:38:54,667 --> 00:38:55,916
- No, indeed.
863
00:38:55,917 --> 00:38:57,082
I don't know what came over me.
864
00:38:57,083 --> 00:38:58,291
Sorry, Nanny.
865
00:38:58,292 --> 00:39:00,249
Made a little boob.
866
00:39:00,250 --> 00:39:01,374
Big boob.
867
00:39:01,375 --> 00:39:02,749
(laughs)
868
00:39:02,750 --> 00:39:04,041
Don't know what's come over me.
869
00:39:04,042 --> 00:39:06,041
Commander, the, uh,
870
00:39:06,042 --> 00:39:07,499
the answer to the minister's message.
871
00:39:07,500 --> 00:39:08,375
- Yes.
872
00:39:08,376 --> 00:39:11,041
If you'll just wait outside.
873
00:39:11,042 --> 00:39:12,249
Take a little drink out there with you.
874
00:39:12,250 --> 00:39:14,041
- I'm not actually used
to alcohol, Commander.
875
00:39:14,042 --> 00:39:15,416
- You will be, baby, you will be.
876
00:39:15,417 --> 00:39:16,874
Whiskey, gin, rum?
877
00:39:16,875 --> 00:39:17,708
- Yes, please.
878
00:39:17,708 --> 00:39:18,542
(laughs)
879
00:39:18,542 --> 00:39:19,542
Thank you.
880
00:39:20,833 --> 00:39:21,708
- Here you are.
881
00:39:21,708 --> 00:39:22,542
Rum, I think.
882
00:39:22,543 --> 00:39:24,707
- Heavens, you'll, you'll
have me pitily-twos.
883
00:39:24,708 --> 00:39:26,041
(chuckles)
884
00:39:26,042 --> 00:39:27,374
Pitily-twos?
885
00:39:27,375 --> 00:39:28,791
I mean tittily-poos.
886
00:39:28,792 --> 00:39:30,541
(laughs)
887
00:39:30,542 --> 00:39:32,249
Pitily-twos.
888
00:39:32,250 --> 00:39:34,333
(laughs)
889
00:39:35,375 --> 00:39:36,208
- Off you go.
890
00:39:36,208 --> 00:39:37,042
- Thank you.
891
00:39:37,043 --> 00:39:38,166
(laughs)
892
00:39:38,167 --> 00:39:39,249
Pitily-twos.
893
00:39:39,250 --> 00:39:40,374
- Well done, Gerry.
894
00:39:40,375 --> 00:39:42,124
- You were wonderful.
895
00:39:42,125 --> 00:39:43,125
- Nothing, really.
896
00:39:43,126 --> 00:39:44,332
- Oi, 007.
897
00:39:44,333 --> 00:39:46,833
(phone rings)
898
00:39:51,750 --> 00:39:52,750
- Hello?
899
00:39:54,292 --> 00:39:56,208
I can't understand you.
900
00:39:57,875 --> 00:39:59,832
Sounds like Russian.
901
00:39:59,833 --> 00:40:01,291
- Russian?
902
00:40:01,292 --> 00:40:02,375
- Oh, my God!
903
00:40:05,833 --> 00:40:07,374
(suspenseful orchestral music)
904
00:40:07,375 --> 00:40:10,458
- There's only one of them there now.
905
00:40:14,542 --> 00:40:16,792
He's gone back in the lane.
906
00:40:20,083 --> 00:40:21,457
- What's this one saying?
907
00:40:21,458 --> 00:40:22,458
- Hello!
908
00:40:23,333 --> 00:40:25,666
I can't understand you.
909
00:40:25,667 --> 00:40:29,333
(speaking foreign language)
910
00:40:33,625 --> 00:40:35,207
What do you want?
911
00:40:35,208 --> 00:40:36,083
- Trying to wear us down,
912
00:40:36,084 --> 00:40:38,082
using psychiatric warfare.
913
00:40:38,083 --> 00:40:40,083
- Please, speak English.
914
00:40:41,083 --> 00:40:42,249
- Now look here.
915
00:40:42,250 --> 00:40:43,874
Do you realise this is British territory?
916
00:40:43,875 --> 00:40:46,082
(speaking foreign language)
917
00:40:46,083 --> 00:40:46,917
If you have something to say,
918
00:40:46,918 --> 00:40:48,082
please don't say it in Russian.
919
00:40:48,083 --> 00:40:50,916
(speaking foreign language)
920
00:40:50,917 --> 00:40:52,832
Petrovyan, who's he?
921
00:40:52,833 --> 00:40:55,874
You're talking a load of Bolshoi.
922
00:40:55,875 --> 00:40:56,708
He's saying "Petrovyan,
923
00:40:56,708 --> 00:40:57,542
Petrovyan, Petrovyan!"
924
00:40:57,542 --> 00:40:58,542
- A-ha!
925
00:40:59,625 --> 00:41:01,875
(knocking)
926
00:41:09,333 --> 00:41:11,166
- Keep calm.
927
00:41:11,167 --> 00:41:13,416
Keep calm, keep calm-
928
00:41:13,417 --> 00:41:14,457
Where is everybody?
929
00:41:14,458 --> 00:41:16,708
(knocking)
930
00:41:22,958 --> 00:41:23,792
Nancy.
931
00:41:23,793 --> 00:41:26,249
(screams)
932
00:41:26,250 --> 00:41:28,291
- I say, Commander.
933
00:41:28,292 --> 00:41:31,208
Have you ever tried eating tidbits?
934
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:33,958
(knocking)
935
00:41:33,959 --> 00:41:35,999
(knob rattling)
936
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:39,500
- Nancy, what the devil is going on there?
937
00:41:42,667 --> 00:41:44,041
Nancy!
938
00:41:44,042 --> 00:41:44,917
(knocking)
939
00:41:44,917 --> 00:41:45,917
Nancy!
940
00:41:47,542 --> 00:41:48,542
Nancy!
941
00:41:55,417 --> 00:41:56,999
- Is that you, Father?
942
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:58,500
- 'Course it's me!
943
00:42:00,583 --> 00:42:01,957
Why is that door bolted?
944
00:42:01,958 --> 00:42:02,958
And who is that fellow
945
00:42:02,958 --> 00:42:03,958
who slammed the door in my face?
946
00:42:03,959 --> 00:42:05,582
- You're supposed to be fishing.
947
00:42:05,583 --> 00:42:06,916
- Blasted car got a puncture.
948
00:42:06,917 --> 00:42:08,832
I had to traipse half a
mile across the field.
949
00:42:08,833 --> 00:42:10,624
- Oh, I see.
950
00:42:10,625 --> 00:42:12,208
- Nancy, uh, Nancy!
951
00:42:13,667 --> 00:42:15,667
Will you open this door!
952
00:42:16,667 --> 00:42:17,750
- It is open!
953
00:42:21,833 --> 00:42:23,874
You're not staying, are you?
954
00:42:23,875 --> 00:42:25,374
- What do you mean?
955
00:42:25,375 --> 00:42:26,208
I'm staying till the blasted
956
00:42:26,209 --> 00:42:29,416
puncture is mended by the blasted garage!
957
00:42:29,417 --> 00:42:31,417
What's going on in here?
958
00:42:36,833 --> 00:42:39,166
I say, I don't know you.
959
00:42:39,167 --> 00:42:40,167
Do I?
960
00:42:40,917 --> 00:42:41,999
- No, I'm a sailor.
961
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:42,833
- Ah.
962
00:42:42,833 --> 00:42:43,833
So I see.
963
00:42:44,833 --> 00:42:47,207
We both wear the same uniform.
964
00:42:47,208 --> 00:42:48,208
- Yes.
965
00:42:48,917 --> 00:42:51,041
- Damn young to be a
commander, aren't you?
966
00:42:51,042 --> 00:42:52,208
- I wear well.
967
00:42:53,208 --> 00:42:54,582
- What's your name?
968
00:42:54,583 --> 00:42:57,416
- He's Commander Laver from MI6.
969
00:42:57,417 --> 00:42:58,624
- MI6?
970
00:42:58,625 --> 00:42:59,832
What is you want then, Laver?
971
00:42:59,833 --> 00:43:00,667
- Nothing.
972
00:43:00,668 --> 00:43:02,249
- He's come to see you, Father.
973
00:43:02,250 --> 00:43:04,499
He's got a message for you, Father.
974
00:43:04,500 --> 00:43:07,624
It's got to be decoded
immediately, Father.
975
00:43:07,625 --> 00:43:08,707
- Well, let's have it then.
976
00:43:08,708 --> 00:43:09,542
- Yes, Father.
977
00:43:09,543 --> 00:43:10,708
- The message.
978
00:43:14,375 --> 00:43:16,166
- You are ABF.
979
00:43:16,167 --> 00:43:18,082
- You mean it's 4ABF.
980
00:43:18,083 --> 00:43:19,666
- Yes.
981
00:43:19,667 --> 00:43:22,167
(phone rings)
982
00:43:25,875 --> 00:43:26,875
- Hello?
983
00:43:28,500 --> 00:43:29,333
What?
984
00:43:29,334 --> 00:43:33,000
(speaking foreign language)
985
00:43:35,125 --> 00:43:37,082
I can't understand a word you're saying.
986
00:43:37,083 --> 00:43:39,249
Speak English, can't you?
987
00:43:39,250 --> 00:43:40,125
- It's for me, sir.
988
00:43:40,125 --> 00:43:40,958
Mummy.
989
00:43:40,959 --> 00:43:42,749
I asked her to phone me here.
990
00:43:42,750 --> 00:43:44,291
- Sounded like a man's voice.
991
00:43:44,292 --> 00:43:46,207
- You haven't met Mummy.
992
00:43:46,208 --> 00:43:47,749
- She's speaking Russian or something.
993
00:43:47,750 --> 00:43:50,249
- No, sir, it only sounds like Russian.
994
00:43:50,250 --> 00:43:51,457
It's my Egyptian mummy.
995
00:43:51,458 --> 00:43:52,292
Hello, Mummy.
996
00:43:52,292 --> 00:43:53,292
Yes, it's your little boy speaking.
997
00:43:53,293 --> 00:43:55,332
No, we don't want any postcards.
998
00:43:55,333 --> 00:43:56,333
Bye-bye.
999
00:43:59,708 --> 00:44:02,542
- I'll go and decode this message.
1000
00:44:08,333 --> 00:44:09,417
In the study.
1001
00:44:11,250 --> 00:44:12,750
- Bloody hell-ski.
1002
00:44:14,375 --> 00:44:15,208
- No, no!
1003
00:44:15,209 --> 00:44:16,291
Not in the study.
1004
00:44:16,292 --> 00:44:17,999
- What do you mean, no,
no, not in the study?
1005
00:44:18,000 --> 00:44:19,332
- Commander Laver would prefer
1006
00:44:19,333 --> 00:44:21,541
that you discuss it in the garden.
1007
00:44:21,542 --> 00:44:22,417
- Yes.
1008
00:44:22,417 --> 00:44:23,250
No!
1009
00:44:23,251 --> 00:44:25,166
Not in the garden until Laver, Laver.
1010
00:44:25,167 --> 00:44:26,207
Much Laver.
1011
00:44:26,208 --> 00:44:29,041
- Where would be convenient
for you, Commander Laver?
1012
00:44:29,042 --> 00:44:30,207
Not in the kitchen.
1013
00:44:30,208 --> 00:44:31,416
- No, not in the kitchen.
1014
00:44:31,417 --> 00:44:32,541
Upstairs?
1015
00:44:32,542 --> 00:44:34,291
Upstairs, in one of the bedrooms.
1016
00:44:34,292 --> 00:44:35,292
- Bedrooms?
1017
00:44:36,250 --> 00:44:37,833
I don't understand-
1018
00:44:40,333 --> 00:44:42,750
- Just practising my signals.
1019
00:44:46,250 --> 00:44:49,832
- I've never seen signals like that.
1020
00:44:49,833 --> 00:44:52,874
- You better go and decode
that message, Father.
1021
00:44:52,875 --> 00:44:53,957
- Yes, in the bedroom.
1022
00:44:53,958 --> 00:44:56,166
- No, in the study.
1023
00:44:56,167 --> 00:44:57,000
- Of course.
1024
00:44:57,000 --> 00:44:57,833
In the study.
1025
00:44:57,834 --> 00:44:58,916
How silly of me.
1026
00:44:58,917 --> 00:45:01,457
(chuckles)
1027
00:45:01,458 --> 00:45:03,875
You better put in some leave.
1028
00:45:07,083 --> 00:45:10,166
- Now to get rid of Petrovyan.
1029
00:45:10,167 --> 00:45:11,000
Out!
1030
00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:12,000
- Out!
1031
00:45:13,208 --> 00:45:14,042
- Out!
1032
00:45:14,042 --> 00:45:14,875
- Ah!
1033
00:45:14,876 --> 00:45:16,166
(light orchestral music)
1034
00:45:16,167 --> 00:45:18,417
- Whoa!
- What's the noise?
1035
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:33,667
- I think my roses need pruning.
1036
00:45:42,792 --> 00:45:44,624
- Who are you?
1037
00:45:44,625 --> 00:45:45,999
- Yes.
1038
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:47,166
-Yes?
1039
00:45:47,167 --> 00:45:48,582
- Yes.
- Yes.
1040
00:45:48,583 --> 00:45:51,874
He's my boyfriend, Gerry Buss.
1041
00:45:51,875 --> 00:45:52,875
Darling.
1042
00:45:54,292 --> 00:45:55,292
- Mm!
1043
00:45:57,500 --> 00:45:58,749
(Nancy chuckles)
1044
00:45:58,750 --> 00:46:01,541
- His face seems rather familiar.
1045
00:46:01,542 --> 00:46:03,916
- He's a very familiar boyfriend.
1046
00:46:03,917 --> 00:46:04,917
- Oh!
1047
00:46:05,750 --> 00:46:06,708
- How do you do?
1048
00:46:06,709 --> 00:46:07,832
- Yes.
1049
00:46:07,833 --> 00:46:10,124
- My father, father.
1050
00:46:10,125 --> 00:46:10,958
- Father.
1051
00:46:10,958 --> 00:46:11,875
Commander Rimmington.
1052
00:46:11,876 --> 00:46:13,374
- Ministry of Defence.
1053
00:46:13,375 --> 00:46:14,208
- British government.
1054
00:46:14,209 --> 00:46:15,874
High-up official, commander.
1055
00:46:15,875 --> 00:46:17,916
- Yes, that just about sums me up.
1056
00:46:17,917 --> 00:46:18,999
- Say hello to Daddy.
1057
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:19,833
- Ah!
1058
00:46:19,834 --> 00:46:21,332
Daddy!
1059
00:46:21,333 --> 00:46:22,457
(smacks kiss)
1060
00:46:22,458 --> 00:46:23,791
(speaking foreign language)
1061
00:46:23,792 --> 00:46:24,792
Daddy.
1062
00:46:25,792 --> 00:46:27,791
- Is this chap your boyfriend?
1063
00:46:27,792 --> 00:46:28,625
- Yes!
1064
00:46:28,626 --> 00:46:30,041
It's quite all right.
1065
00:46:30,042 --> 00:46:31,042
- Is it?
1066
00:46:31,958 --> 00:46:33,582
- He's a foreigner, you see,
1067
00:46:33,583 --> 00:46:35,957
he can't speak any English.
1068
00:46:35,958 --> 00:46:36,958
- Foreigner, eh?
1069
00:46:36,959 --> 00:46:39,041
- French.
- Polish.
1070
00:46:39,042 --> 00:46:41,125
Half-French, half-Polish.
1071
00:46:42,042 --> 00:46:45,082
- If he's half-French, and half-Polish,
1072
00:46:45,083 --> 00:46:48,207
how did he come to be called Gerry?
1073
00:46:48,208 --> 00:46:50,208
- He was born in Poland.
1074
00:46:53,208 --> 00:46:54,707
- You said he was a civil servant.
1075
00:46:54,708 --> 00:46:56,582
- Yes, with the Polish government.
1076
00:46:56,583 --> 00:46:57,791
He's over here on a course.
1077
00:46:57,792 --> 00:47:00,207
(phone rings)
1078
00:47:00,208 --> 00:47:01,375
- I'll get it.
1079
00:47:03,375 --> 00:47:05,416
Hello, Mummy, I've asked you to stop
1080
00:47:05,417 --> 00:47:06,457
phoning me here.
1081
00:47:06,458 --> 00:47:07,292
Goodbye.
1082
00:47:07,292 --> 00:47:08,125
Auf wiedersehen.
1083
00:47:08,125 --> 00:47:08,958
(speaks foreign language)
1084
00:47:08,959 --> 00:47:10,458
I beg your pardon?
1085
00:47:13,625 --> 00:47:14,707
It's your garage for you,
1086
00:47:14,708 --> 00:47:15,916
sir, the car's ready.
1087
00:47:15,917 --> 00:47:19,541
- All right, all right, all right.
1088
00:47:19,542 --> 00:47:20,417
- Marvellous.
1089
00:47:20,418 --> 00:47:21,749
Off you go then, Daddy.
1090
00:47:21,750 --> 00:47:23,416
- I've gotta reply to the signal first.
1091
00:47:23,417 --> 00:47:24,832
Blasted nuisance it is.
1092
00:47:24,833 --> 00:47:27,666
About some damned defecting
Russian called Petrovyan.
1093
00:47:27,667 --> 00:47:28,667
- Ah!
1094
00:47:29,750 --> 00:47:30,750
Mm!
1095
00:47:31,708 --> 00:47:33,957
- You say he works for
the Polish government?
1096
00:47:33,958 --> 00:47:35,457
- Yes.
1097
00:47:35,458 --> 00:47:38,124
- No wonder they're a hell of a mess.
1098
00:47:38,125 --> 00:47:39,916
What do you think, Laver?
1099
00:47:39,917 --> 00:47:40,957
- If he carries on like that
1100
00:47:40,958 --> 00:47:42,249
they'll transfer him to the admiralty.
1101
00:47:42,250 --> 00:47:44,333
(laughs)
1102
00:47:49,167 --> 00:47:50,042
- Is everything all right?
1103
00:47:50,042 --> 00:47:50,875
- No, it isn't.
1104
00:47:50,876 --> 00:47:52,042
You, in there!
1105
00:47:58,583 --> 00:47:59,833
- Father's car!
1106
00:48:03,333 --> 00:48:04,292
- Will you stop that!
1107
00:48:04,292 --> 00:48:05,292
- [Rudi] Yes!
1108
00:48:05,293 --> 00:48:06,582
- You can't get out the front
1109
00:48:06,583 --> 00:48:08,124
way because of those Russians.
1110
00:48:08,125 --> 00:48:08,958
- Right.
1111
00:48:08,959 --> 00:48:12,541
- So you can take Father's
car, cut across the fields,
1112
00:48:12,542 --> 00:48:15,541
and it's in the garage in the village.
1113
00:48:15,542 --> 00:48:17,291
Here's the note.
1114
00:48:17,292 --> 00:48:18,791
- Marvellous.
1115
00:48:18,792 --> 00:48:20,249
We go now.
1116
00:48:20,250 --> 00:48:21,125
- [Rudi] Mm!
1117
00:48:21,125 --> 00:48:21,958
- Good luck.
1118
00:48:21,958 --> 00:48:22,792
- Come on, darling.
1119
00:48:22,792 --> 00:48:23,708
We're going.
1120
00:48:23,708 --> 00:48:24,708
Okay.
1121
00:48:32,500 --> 00:48:34,291
- Head for the big old oak tree
1122
00:48:34,292 --> 00:48:36,374
about a quarter of a mile across the way.
1123
00:48:36,375 --> 00:48:37,707
Then keep going.
1124
00:48:37,708 --> 00:48:39,207
- Thank you.
1125
00:48:39,208 --> 00:48:40,874
Goodbye, darlings.
1126
00:48:40,875 --> 00:48:42,624
Thank for everything.
1127
00:48:42,625 --> 00:48:47,375
- Farewell, (speaking foreign language).
1128
00:48:49,000 --> 00:48:49,833
(sighs)
1129
00:48:49,834 --> 00:48:51,832
- At last, we can relax.
1130
00:48:51,833 --> 00:48:53,332
- Relax?
1131
00:48:53,333 --> 00:48:54,707
What about Laver?
1132
00:48:54,708 --> 00:48:56,916
- Well, as soon as you get with my father,
1133
00:48:56,917 --> 00:48:58,166
you can give it to Mr. Laver
1134
00:48:58,167 --> 00:49:00,667
and off he goes, my clever PA,
1135
00:49:01,750 --> 00:49:03,582
to the PPS, to the PM.
1136
00:49:03,583 --> 00:49:07,000
(light orchestral music)
1137
00:49:13,792 --> 00:49:15,208
- My lovely girl.
1138
00:49:21,042 --> 00:49:23,708
(clears throat)
1139
00:49:33,500 --> 00:49:36,541
- Commander, you're
embracing the au pair girl.
1140
00:49:36,542 --> 00:49:38,708
- That will be all, Nanny.
1141
00:49:39,708 --> 00:49:41,125
- Thank you, sir.
1142
00:49:43,792 --> 00:49:45,499
- Commander, I'm amazed
that you should permit
1143
00:49:45,500 --> 00:49:46,832
philandering with the staff
1144
00:49:46,833 --> 00:49:48,374
to interfere with matters of state.
1145
00:49:48,375 --> 00:49:49,208
- Quite.
1146
00:49:49,208 --> 00:49:50,042
I stand rebuked.
1147
00:49:50,043 --> 00:49:51,874
- Especially with your wife around.
1148
00:49:51,875 --> 00:49:54,374
- She's very understanding.
1149
00:49:54,375 --> 00:49:55,957
- You mean she doesn't mind?
1150
00:49:55,958 --> 00:49:57,041
- No.
1151
00:49:57,042 --> 00:49:59,332
Plenty for everybody.
1152
00:49:59,333 --> 00:50:02,374
- Oh, absolutely marvellous.
1153
00:50:02,375 --> 00:50:03,375
If you carry on like this,
1154
00:50:03,376 --> 00:50:05,124
Commander, you'll never
be made an admiral.
1155
00:50:05,125 --> 00:50:06,791
- How about a vice admiral?
1156
00:50:06,792 --> 00:50:08,166
(laughs)
1157
00:50:08,167 --> 00:50:09,916
(mutters)
1158
00:50:09,917 --> 00:50:12,417
(phone rings)
1159
00:50:17,250 --> 00:50:19,291
- Aren't you going to answer it, sir?
1160
00:50:19,292 --> 00:50:20,749
- Don't think so.
1161
00:50:20,750 --> 00:50:21,750
- Hm.
1162
00:50:28,042 --> 00:50:29,625
- Are you all deaf?
1163
00:50:31,708 --> 00:50:32,708
Hello?
1164
00:50:33,417 --> 00:50:34,375
No, I'll take a message.
1165
00:50:34,376 --> 00:50:37,624
Commander Rimmington's not here.
1166
00:50:37,625 --> 00:50:38,625
- Hoskins!
1167
00:50:39,375 --> 00:50:40,874
- Oh, uh, well, I mean,
1168
00:50:40,875 --> 00:50:43,207
Commander Rimmington is here.
1169
00:50:43,208 --> 00:50:45,874
I'll still take a message.
1170
00:50:45,875 --> 00:50:46,750
- Poor old fellow.
1171
00:50:46,750 --> 00:50:47,708
Don't know why I keep him, really.
1172
00:50:47,708 --> 00:50:48,542
- All right.
1173
00:50:48,542 --> 00:50:49,542
Goodbye.
1174
00:50:50,667 --> 00:50:51,542
- Very well, Hoskins.
1175
00:50:51,543 --> 00:50:52,999
Give me the message.
1176
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:54,499
- All right.
1177
00:50:54,500 --> 00:50:55,500
She's back from London
1178
00:50:55,501 --> 00:50:56,874
and would you pick her up at the station?
1179
00:50:56,875 --> 00:50:57,999
- Who?
1180
00:50:58,000 --> 00:50:59,000
- Your wife.
1181
00:51:03,375 --> 00:51:04,375
- Wife?
1182
00:51:05,208 --> 00:51:06,707
- It's another one.
1183
00:51:06,708 --> 00:51:08,124
- Another wife?
1184
00:51:08,125 --> 00:51:09,832
- No, that would be bigamy.
1185
00:51:09,833 --> 00:51:10,833
Very bigamy.
1186
00:51:11,792 --> 00:51:13,082
No, it's another girlfriend
1187
00:51:13,083 --> 00:51:15,166
pretending to be my wife.
1188
00:51:15,167 --> 00:51:18,207
Joining me down here for, you know,
1189
00:51:18,208 --> 00:51:20,125
- I say, la dolce vita.
1190
00:51:21,417 --> 00:51:23,582
- Well, my wife's out for the evening, so
1191
00:51:23,583 --> 00:51:25,874
I invited this girlfriend down.
1192
00:51:25,875 --> 00:51:27,249
- But you were having it off
1193
00:51:27,250 --> 00:51:28,499
with au pair girl just now.
1194
00:51:28,500 --> 00:51:30,457
- I had five minutes to spare.
1195
00:51:30,458 --> 00:51:31,292
- Darling, I-
1196
00:51:31,293 --> 00:51:33,291
- What are you doing
back so early, darling?
1197
00:51:33,292 --> 00:51:37,082
- I had to return unexpectedly, darling.
1198
00:51:37,083 --> 00:51:38,833
- A dash awkward, eh?
1199
00:51:51,875 --> 00:51:53,874
- She's been out in the
garden with her hairdresser.
1200
00:51:53,875 --> 00:51:55,125
- Good heavens!
1201
00:51:59,250 --> 00:52:00,417
- Has he gone?
1202
00:52:02,792 --> 00:52:03,625
What's she doing-
1203
00:52:03,626 --> 00:52:04,874
- That will be all, Nanny.
1204
00:52:04,875 --> 00:52:07,041
- I wouldn't be in your shoes, Commander.
1205
00:52:07,042 --> 00:52:08,249
- Neither would I.
1206
00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:09,916
Tell you what, Laver.
1207
00:52:09,917 --> 00:52:11,291
I'll get you another bottle.
1208
00:52:11,292 --> 00:52:12,957
- I've already got two
bottles out there, sir.
1209
00:52:12,958 --> 00:52:14,707
Live dangerously, Laver.
1210
00:52:14,708 --> 00:52:15,708
The night is young.
1211
00:52:15,709 --> 00:52:17,708
And you're so beautiful.
1212
00:52:19,500 --> 00:52:21,417
- Thank you, Commander.
1213
00:52:25,458 --> 00:52:27,332
- What are you two doing back here?
1214
00:52:27,333 --> 00:52:29,791
(speaking foreign language)
1215
00:52:29,792 --> 00:52:31,416
- Don't panic, darling.
1216
00:52:31,417 --> 00:52:33,374
Our Russian friends have split up.
1217
00:52:33,375 --> 00:52:34,707
There's one watching the front
1218
00:52:34,708 --> 00:52:36,207
and one watching the back now.
1219
00:52:36,208 --> 00:52:37,208
- Oh, no!
1220
00:52:45,208 --> 00:52:46,208
- Right.
1221
00:52:46,209 --> 00:52:48,666
Russians or no Russians,
1222
00:52:48,667 --> 00:52:51,332
you two have got to go.
1223
00:52:51,333 --> 00:52:53,374
(light orchestral music)
1224
00:52:53,375 --> 00:52:54,957
Oh, my God!
1225
00:52:54,958 --> 00:52:57,082
(both chattering)
1226
00:52:57,083 --> 00:52:58,167
We've had it.
1227
00:53:03,750 --> 00:53:06,000
(knocking)
1228
00:53:15,458 --> 00:53:16,458
We will just have to plead
1229
00:53:16,459 --> 00:53:18,499
insanity and hand him over to the police.
1230
00:53:18,500 --> 00:53:19,333
- Police?
1231
00:53:19,334 --> 00:53:20,874
- Will you stop that!
1232
00:53:20,875 --> 00:53:22,707
- Hell of a lot of shouting.
1233
00:53:22,708 --> 00:53:24,292
Oh, good afternoon.
1234
00:53:25,542 --> 00:53:26,749
- Hello, darling.
1235
00:53:26,750 --> 00:53:27,583
- I don't think I've-
1236
00:53:27,584 --> 00:53:28,666
- She's the prospective
1237
00:53:28,667 --> 00:53:30,999
candidate for the local council.
1238
00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:31,875
- Yes.
1239
00:53:31,875 --> 00:53:32,708
What party?
1240
00:53:32,709 --> 00:53:34,291
- Liberal.
1241
00:53:34,292 --> 00:53:35,374
- You better go and decode
1242
00:53:35,375 --> 00:53:37,124
that message, Father.
1243
00:53:37,125 --> 00:53:37,958
- Yes.
1244
00:53:37,958 --> 00:53:38,958
I wouldn't mind
1245
00:53:38,959 --> 00:53:40,957
knowing what the young lady stands for.
1246
00:53:40,958 --> 00:53:42,041
- Practically anything.
1247
00:53:42,042 --> 00:53:43,791
- Get the message, Father.
1248
00:53:43,792 --> 00:53:45,291
- Oh, yes.
1249
00:53:45,292 --> 00:53:46,292
Yes, I did.
1250
00:53:48,250 --> 00:53:51,291
(knocking)
1251
00:53:51,292 --> 00:53:52,292
- Keep calm.
1252
00:53:52,292 --> 00:53:53,292
Keep calm.
1253
00:53:53,958 --> 00:53:55,416
Keep calm!
1254
00:53:55,417 --> 00:53:56,500
Stop shaking!
1255
00:53:57,833 --> 00:53:58,708
It's me who's shaking.
1256
00:53:58,709 --> 00:54:00,249
- Was that a knock at the door?
1257
00:54:00,250 --> 00:54:01,332
- [All] No!
1258
00:54:01,333 --> 00:54:02,417
- [Rudi] Yes.
1259
00:54:05,250 --> 00:54:07,749
- I'll get this reply for
you right away, Laver.
1260
00:54:07,750 --> 00:54:12,958
(knocking)
1261
00:54:16,167 --> 00:54:18,291
(knocking on door)
1262
00:54:18,292 --> 00:54:20,542
(stomping)
1263
00:54:24,792 --> 00:54:26,207
(door slams)
1264
00:54:26,208 --> 00:54:27,167
- Rudi, quick!
1265
00:54:27,167 --> 00:54:28,000
Into the kitchen!
1266
00:54:28,001 --> 00:54:30,291
You both deal with the police.
1267
00:54:30,292 --> 00:54:32,749
- Thank you very much.
1268
00:54:32,750 --> 00:54:35,707
(knocking on door)
1269
00:54:35,708 --> 00:54:37,374
- Now that was definitely
somebody knocking.
1270
00:54:37,375 --> 00:54:38,208
- No, sir, no.
1271
00:54:38,209 --> 00:54:39,499
That was me.
1272
00:54:39,500 --> 00:54:40,749
Tap-dancing.
1273
00:54:40,750 --> 00:54:42,749
(tapping)
1274
00:54:42,750 --> 00:54:44,124
♪ Come with me ♪
1275
00:54:44,125 --> 00:54:45,916
♪ I'll come with you ♪
1276
00:54:45,917 --> 00:54:47,457
♪ Open the door ♪
1277
00:54:47,458 --> 00:54:50,292
♪ We're in a stew ♪
1278
00:54:52,417 --> 00:54:53,750
- You sit there.
1279
00:54:56,542 --> 00:54:58,875
I shall decode this message.
1280
00:55:02,042 --> 00:55:03,958
And keep your distance.
1281
00:55:13,458 --> 00:55:15,457
- Good afternoon, darling.
1282
00:55:15,458 --> 00:55:16,832
- Afternoon, darling.
1283
00:55:16,833 --> 00:55:17,833
Afternoon.
1284
00:55:19,750 --> 00:55:21,082
Local police, madam.
1285
00:55:21,083 --> 00:55:22,332
Constable Pulford.
1286
00:55:22,333 --> 00:55:23,750
- Sh, sh, sh, sh!
1287
00:55:26,250 --> 00:55:27,083
- Constable Pulford.
1288
00:55:27,084 --> 00:55:28,249
I'm local police.
1289
00:55:28,250 --> 00:55:29,250
- Lovely.
1290
00:55:31,458 --> 00:55:34,374
- Uh, yes, might [, uh,
inquire who you are?
1291
00:55:34,375 --> 00:55:35,208
- Yes, of course, darling.
1292
00:55:35,209 --> 00:55:36,541
Would you be surprised
1293
00:55:36,542 --> 00:55:38,416
if I said I was your
local Liberal candidate?
1294
00:55:38,417 --> 00:55:39,541
- Yes, I would.
1295
00:55:39,542 --> 00:55:40,832
That is Mr. Philips, the undertaker.
1296
00:55:40,833 --> 00:55:43,416
- Oh, I can't kid you, can I?
1297
00:55:43,417 --> 00:55:44,832
What about Mrs. Rimmington?
1298
00:55:44,833 --> 00:55:45,833
Have you met her?
1299
00:55:45,833 --> 00:55:46,792
- No, just the Commander.
1300
00:55:46,793 --> 00:55:49,207
- Well, how do you do then, darling?
1301
00:55:49,208 --> 00:55:50,457
- How do you do, Mrs. Rimmington?
1302
00:55:50,458 --> 00:55:51,582
- Thank you for calling.
1303
00:55:51,583 --> 00:55:53,291
Put us down for two tickets.
1304
00:55:53,292 --> 00:55:54,374
- Tickets?
1305
00:55:54,375 --> 00:55:56,666
- Well, I'm all in favour
of policemen having them.
1306
00:55:56,667 --> 00:55:57,667
- Having what?
1307
00:55:57,668 --> 00:55:59,332
- Balls!
1308
00:55:59,333 --> 00:56:01,707
Well, my husband and I love a good dance.
1309
00:56:01,708 --> 00:56:03,999
- No, madam, I am here
because your neighbour,
1310
00:56:04,000 --> 00:56:06,582
Mr. Hargreaves, has a lady who does.
1311
00:56:06,583 --> 00:56:07,666
- Lucky Mr. Hargreaves.
1312
00:56:07,667 --> 00:56:08,916
(chuckles)
1313
00:56:08,917 --> 00:56:10,332
- This is a certain Mrs. Frost
1314
00:56:10,333 --> 00:56:11,749
and this certain Mrs. Frost
1315
00:56:11,750 --> 00:56:14,207
says that she was in
Mr. Hargreaves' garden
1316
00:56:14,208 --> 00:56:15,374
earlier today and do you know
1317
00:56:15,375 --> 00:56:17,791
what she saw in your driveway?
1318
00:56:17,792 --> 00:56:18,792
- No.
1319
00:56:18,793 --> 00:56:22,124
- A young fellow prancing
about in an effeminate manner.
1320
00:56:22,125 --> 00:56:23,541
- Effeminate manner?
1321
00:56:23,542 --> 00:56:24,375
- So with your permission,
1322
00:56:24,376 --> 00:56:25,999
I would like to question your gardener.
1323
00:56:26,000 --> 00:56:27,499
- Why yes, of course, darling.
1324
00:56:27,500 --> 00:56:28,707
I mean, no darling.
1325
00:56:28,708 --> 00:56:30,332
I mean, you sit down there
1326
00:56:30,333 --> 00:56:34,041
and make yourself nice and comfortable.
1327
00:56:34,042 --> 00:56:35,374
There we are.
1328
00:56:35,375 --> 00:56:37,792
And I'll go find him for you.
1329
00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:40,000
There.
1330
00:56:40,875 --> 00:56:42,374
Oh, I'll just tell
1331
00:56:42,375 --> 00:56:45,249
the au pair girl you're here.
1332
00:56:45,250 --> 00:56:46,499
Darling!
1333
00:56:46,500 --> 00:56:47,832
- Yes!
1334
00:56:47,833 --> 00:56:49,291
- Don't come in, darling.
1335
00:56:49,292 --> 00:56:51,624
The police are here.
1336
00:56:51,625 --> 00:56:54,374
Constable Pulford, local police,
1337
00:56:54,375 --> 00:56:55,542
in the lounge.
1338
00:57:06,625 --> 00:57:07,832
- I think I'll just, uh-
1339
00:57:07,833 --> 00:57:08,833
- What?
1340
00:57:09,917 --> 00:57:11,250
- Spend a penny?
1341
00:57:13,042 --> 00:57:14,791
- Go on then.
1342
00:57:14,792 --> 00:57:15,792
- Thank you.
1343
00:57:22,417 --> 00:57:24,291
- You better hurry up.
1344
00:57:24,292 --> 00:57:25,292
- Most kind.
1345
00:57:29,125 --> 00:57:29,958
The cops!
1346
00:57:29,958 --> 00:57:30,958
- Where?
1347
00:57:31,667 --> 00:57:33,499
- Gave me quite a fright, sir.
1348
00:57:33,500 --> 00:57:35,000
Constable Pulford.
1349
00:57:36,458 --> 00:57:37,541
Constable Pulford.
1350
00:57:37,542 --> 00:57:38,874
Yes, sit down.
1351
00:57:38,875 --> 00:57:39,875
Down, yes.
1352
00:57:41,708 --> 00:57:43,125
Put your feet up.
1353
00:57:44,542 --> 00:57:47,999
I'll just tell the au
pair girl you're here.
1354
00:57:48,000 --> 00:57:49,000
- Darling!
1355
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:50,000
-Yes?
1356
00:57:55,542 --> 00:57:57,457
- Darling, don't come in
to the lounge, darling.
1357
00:57:57,458 --> 00:57:58,666
The local police are here, darling.
1358
00:57:58,667 --> 00:58:02,082
Constable Pulford in the lounge.
1359
00:58:02,083 --> 00:58:04,916
I'll just lock the study.
1360
00:58:04,917 --> 00:58:06,082
(lock clicks)
1361
00:58:06,083 --> 00:58:07,374
Always think it's best
to lock everything up
1362
00:58:07,375 --> 00:58:09,625
when the police are around.
1363
00:58:10,542 --> 00:58:11,542
- Excuse me, sir.
1364
00:58:11,543 --> 00:58:13,582
But time is, um, oh.
1365
00:58:13,583 --> 00:58:14,583
- Mr. Laver, how nice to see you.
1366
00:58:14,584 --> 00:58:16,082
Constable Pulford, Mr. Laver.
1367
00:58:16,083 --> 00:58:16,917
Mr. Laver, Constable Pulford.
1368
00:58:16,917 --> 00:58:17,917
Constable.
1369
00:58:21,958 --> 00:58:24,374
- Commander, the answer
to the minister's message.
1370
00:58:24,375 --> 00:58:25,208
- Yes.
1371
00:58:25,208 --> 00:58:26,125
Two minutes at the most.
1372
00:58:26,126 --> 00:58:27,207
Take some sherry outside with you.
1373
00:58:27,208 --> 00:58:28,042
- Thank you.
1374
00:58:28,042 --> 00:58:28,875
Most kind.
1375
00:58:28,875 --> 00:58:29,708
Could I bother you
1376
00:58:29,709 --> 00:58:30,916
for some ice for the whiskey, please?
1377
00:58:30,917 --> 00:58:31,750
- Of course.
1378
00:58:31,751 --> 00:58:33,124
- Thank you.
1379
00:58:33,125 --> 00:58:34,707
Thank you.
1380
00:58:34,708 --> 00:58:35,957
(laughs)
1381
00:58:35,958 --> 00:58:36,958
Piddly-toos.
1382
00:58:36,959 --> 00:58:39,042
(laughs)
1383
00:58:41,792 --> 00:58:43,916
- May I ask who you are, sir?
1384
00:58:43,917 --> 00:58:44,833
- Certainly.
1385
00:58:44,834 --> 00:58:46,749
Uh, do you know Commander Rimmington?
1386
00:58:46,750 --> 00:58:47,874
- Yes, sir.
1387
00:58:47,875 --> 00:58:48,750
- Jolly good.
1388
00:58:48,750 --> 00:58:49,708
- I'm a friend of his.
1389
00:58:49,709 --> 00:58:51,707
Commander, ahem.
1390
00:58:51,708 --> 00:58:54,499
- I'm pleased to meet
you, Commander, ahem?
1391
00:58:54,500 --> 00:58:55,333
- Pleased to meet you, Constable.
1392
00:58:55,333 --> 00:58:56,292
Goodbye.
1393
00:58:56,293 --> 00:58:57,332
- Goodbye, sir.
1394
00:58:57,333 --> 00:58:58,167
A minute.
1395
00:58:58,168 --> 00:59:00,291
I'm here to see your gardener.
1396
00:59:00,292 --> 00:59:01,499
The daily help from next door
1397
00:59:01,500 --> 00:59:03,166
is in a bit of a condition.
1398
00:59:03,167 --> 00:59:05,291
- Well, if Hoskins is
the father, he must pay.
1399
00:59:05,292 --> 00:59:06,250
- No, sir.
1400
00:59:06,251 --> 00:59:09,916
- I'm terribly sorry, oh, darling.
1401
00:59:09,917 --> 00:59:11,291
The constable here is on the lookout
1402
00:59:11,292 --> 00:59:13,166
for an effeminate young man.
1403
00:59:13,167 --> 00:59:14,791
- Everybody to his own taste.
1404
00:59:14,792 --> 00:59:15,957
- No, darling.
1405
00:59:15,958 --> 00:59:17,791
A young man was seen prancing outside
1406
00:59:17,792 --> 00:59:19,666
Hoskins' cottage.
1407
00:59:19,667 --> 00:59:21,666
- That's, ha-ha.
1408
00:59:21,667 --> 00:59:22,791
(laughs)
1409
00:59:22,792 --> 00:59:24,624
- Now, look.
1410
00:59:24,625 --> 00:59:25,625
I may not be one of your
1411
00:59:25,626 --> 00:59:28,207
bright boys from Scotland Yard,
1412
00:59:28,208 --> 00:59:29,791
but I think this fellow
1413
00:59:29,792 --> 00:59:31,291
was that Russian dancer bloke.
1414
00:59:31,292 --> 00:59:32,874
- [Both] No, no, no!
1415
00:59:32,875 --> 00:59:33,708
- Well, it sounds like a
1416
00:59:33,709 --> 00:59:35,416
dancer, doesn't it, prancing?
1417
00:59:35,417 --> 00:59:39,416
You know they got a
sort of a way with them.
1418
00:59:39,417 --> 00:59:41,666
- That's very good.
1419
00:59:41,667 --> 00:59:42,667
- You sure it wasn't you?
1420
00:59:42,668 --> 00:59:43,791
- I want to see Hoskins.
1421
00:59:43,792 --> 00:59:45,082
- I just remembered.
1422
00:59:45,083 --> 00:59:46,374
He said he was going down to the local pub
1423
00:59:46,375 --> 00:59:47,999
in the village.
1424
00:59:48,000 --> 00:59:49,832
- I wish you said that before, madam.
1425
00:59:49,833 --> 00:59:50,667
I'll go straight down there.
1426
00:59:50,667 --> 00:59:51,500
- Good idea.
1427
00:59:51,501 --> 00:59:52,832
Goodbye, Constable.
1428
00:59:52,833 --> 00:59:54,124
Say goodbye to the sexy little wife.
1429
00:59:54,125 --> 00:59:54,958
- No!
1430
00:59:54,959 --> 00:59:57,707
- You got to say goodbye, darling.
1431
00:59:57,708 --> 00:59:59,499
- You say your wife, sir?
1432
00:59:59,500 --> 01:00:00,582
- Of course.
1433
01:00:00,583 --> 01:00:02,207
- You've done it now, darling.
1434
01:00:02,208 --> 01:00:04,291
The constable knows I'm Mrs. Rimmington.
1435
01:00:04,292 --> 01:00:05,125
- Of course.
1436
01:00:05,126 --> 01:00:07,125
And I'm, Commander ahem!
1437
01:00:09,083 --> 01:00:10,833
- Oh, you understand.
1438
01:00:13,167 --> 01:00:14,666
- No.
1439
01:00:14,667 --> 01:00:17,832
- Well, the Commander ahem, and I are,
1440
01:00:17,833 --> 01:00:20,332
well, while my husband's away
1441
01:00:20,333 --> 01:00:23,166
fishing for the evening, Commander ahem,
1442
01:00:23,167 --> 01:00:25,333
and I are, well, you know.
1443
01:00:27,625 --> 01:00:28,999
- Well, that's your affair,
1444
01:00:29,000 --> 01:00:31,667
if you'll pardon the expression.
1445
01:00:33,000 --> 01:00:34,749
- You mustn't be too
hard on Mrs. Rimmington.
1446
01:00:34,750 --> 01:00:35,667
If only you knew how her
1447
01:00:35,668 --> 01:00:37,291
husband treated her.
1448
01:00:37,292 --> 01:00:40,625
Beats her three times a day after meals.
1449
01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:43,749
- Yes, well, it's a private matter.
1450
01:00:43,750 --> 01:00:44,791
I must say, uh,
1451
01:00:44,792 --> 01:00:45,916
I wouldn't have believed it,
1452
01:00:45,917 --> 01:00:47,374
the Commander, three times
1453
01:00:47,375 --> 01:00:49,708
a day seems a bit excessive.
1454
01:00:52,917 --> 01:00:55,416
- This is catastrophic.
1455
01:00:55,417 --> 01:00:57,457
Hoskins has been seen with Petrovyan.
1456
01:00:57,458 --> 01:00:58,874
What the devil is he eating?
1457
01:00:58,875 --> 01:00:59,957
- It's glucose.
1458
01:00:59,958 --> 01:01:01,916
He's got to keep up his strength.
1459
01:01:01,917 --> 01:01:03,582
Now listen, as soon as it
1460
01:01:03,583 --> 01:01:04,791
starts getting dark, you must
1461
01:01:04,792 --> 01:01:06,291
slip past those two Russians,
1462
01:01:06,292 --> 01:01:08,457
get to the village and take Father's car.
1463
01:01:08,458 --> 01:01:11,082
Oh, you're doing very
well, Gerry, darling.
1464
01:01:11,083 --> 01:01:12,416
- Marvellously.
1465
01:01:12,417 --> 01:01:13,582
I got Mr. Laver out there,
1466
01:01:13,583 --> 01:01:14,791
the Commander in there,
1467
01:01:14,792 --> 01:01:15,750
we're surrounded by Russians,
1468
01:01:15,750 --> 01:01:16,583
I don't know whether I'm
1469
01:01:16,583 --> 01:01:17,417
Commander Laver or Commander
1470
01:01:17,418 --> 01:01:18,541
Rimmington or Commander ahem,
1471
01:01:18,542 --> 01:01:19,791
I've got a wife, nanny,
1472
01:01:19,792 --> 01:01:20,957
three or four children,
1473
01:01:20,958 --> 01:01:22,416
I'm the sexiest beast in
Whitehall, and after you
1474
01:01:22,417 --> 01:01:24,124
with the glucose.
1475
01:01:24,125 --> 01:01:26,541
- [Commander] Nancy!
1476
01:01:26,542 --> 01:01:27,666
- Your father, I'd forgotten.
1477
01:01:27,667 --> 01:01:29,166
He's locked in.
1478
01:01:29,167 --> 01:01:32,582
(door rattling)
1479
01:01:32,583 --> 01:01:34,457
- Open this door!
1480
01:01:34,458 --> 01:01:35,625
- Coming, sir.
1481
01:01:36,833 --> 01:01:37,957
- Who locked that door?
1482
01:01:37,958 --> 01:01:38,958
- He did.
1483
01:01:39,667 --> 01:01:40,749
- You did?
1484
01:01:40,750 --> 01:01:41,583
- Yes.
1485
01:01:41,584 --> 01:01:43,583
- It was a joke, Father.
1486
01:01:45,333 --> 01:01:48,291
- Our Liberal candidate is still here.
1487
01:01:48,292 --> 01:01:49,332
- Yes, darling.
1488
01:01:49,333 --> 01:01:51,374
I have a very large manifesto.
1489
01:01:51,375 --> 01:01:52,250
- Excuse me, sir.
1490
01:01:52,250 --> 01:01:53,083
Is that the BF reply
1491
01:01:53,084 --> 01:01:54,374
to the BF message you have?
1492
01:01:54,375 --> 01:01:56,166
- Yes, Laver, it is.
1493
01:01:56,167 --> 01:01:57,000
You and I will walk down
1494
01:01:57,001 --> 01:01:59,082
to the village and get my car.
1495
01:01:59,083 --> 01:02:00,249
- Your car?
1496
01:02:00,250 --> 01:02:01,582
- I shall then see Commander
1497
01:02:01,583 --> 01:02:03,917
Laver safely onto the train.
1498
01:02:04,958 --> 01:02:07,791
- I wanted to stay here with you.
1499
01:02:07,792 --> 01:02:09,292
- I'll get my hat.
1500
01:02:15,625 --> 01:02:17,791
- If he takes his car, you've had it.
1501
01:02:17,792 --> 01:02:19,541
- If he takes me to the
station, we've all had it.
1502
01:02:19,542 --> 01:02:20,542
- Why?
1503
01:02:20,543 --> 01:02:22,082
- Your mother's there,
waiting to be picked up.
1504
01:02:22,083 --> 01:02:23,249
- Oh, no!
1505
01:02:23,250 --> 01:02:25,499
Well, at least we can
get rid of Mr. Laver,
1506
01:02:25,500 --> 01:02:27,624
now that we've got that message.
1507
01:02:27,625 --> 01:02:30,542
We must keep Father out of the way.
1508
01:02:32,250 --> 01:02:33,167
- I've got it!
1509
01:02:33,167 --> 01:02:34,000
- What?
1510
01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:34,833
- The answer!
1511
01:02:34,834 --> 01:02:36,666
Rudi must make a dash for it.
1512
01:02:36,667 --> 01:02:38,582
- Now at last you're seeing sense.
1513
01:02:38,583 --> 01:02:40,374
- He'll be seen by those Russians.
1514
01:02:40,375 --> 01:02:41,832
- That's the whole ideal!
1515
01:02:41,833 --> 01:02:42,916
And when they've finally caught
1516
01:02:42,917 --> 01:02:44,041
up with him, they'll realise
1517
01:02:44,042 --> 01:02:45,499
they've caught a red herring.
1518
01:02:45,500 --> 01:02:47,166
Someone impersonating Rudi.
1519
01:02:47,167 --> 01:02:49,249
A darling decoy.
1520
01:02:49,250 --> 01:02:50,874
- A decoy!
1521
01:02:50,875 --> 01:02:51,875
Marvellous!
1522
01:02:52,583 --> 01:02:53,458
- And in the meantime,
1523
01:02:53,459 --> 01:02:54,541
Rudi and I would have made
1524
01:02:54,542 --> 01:02:56,916
a crafty escape in the opposite direction.
1525
01:02:56,917 --> 01:02:58,082
- Hey.
1526
01:02:58,083 --> 01:02:59,124
Hey, it could work.
1527
01:02:59,125 --> 01:03:00,999
- It will work.
1528
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:04,332
- Which idiot are you going
to get to impersonate,
1529
01:03:04,333 --> 01:03:06,249
(chuckles)
1530
01:03:06,250 --> 01:03:07,125
Huh.
1531
01:03:07,126 --> 01:03:10,125
Commanders yes, ballet dancers nyet.
1532
01:03:11,333 --> 01:03:13,249
- Well, at least think
yourself lucky you don't
1533
01:03:13,250 --> 01:03:15,832
have to wear ballet tights.
1534
01:03:15,833 --> 01:03:17,499
- I don't know why
you're laughing, darling.
1535
01:03:17,500 --> 01:03:18,707
You're gonna have to be me.
1536
01:03:18,708 --> 01:03:19,874
Boom-boom.
1537
01:03:19,875 --> 01:03:21,166
- Here, Miss Nancy.
1538
01:03:21,167 --> 01:03:22,167
That Mr. Laver,
1539
01:03:22,168 --> 01:03:23,249
he's cavorting about the lawn
1540
01:03:23,250 --> 01:03:24,874
in an intoxicated manner.
1541
01:03:24,875 --> 01:03:26,082
- Yes, Hoskins, we know.
1542
01:03:26,083 --> 01:03:28,750
(Laver singing)
1543
01:03:39,708 --> 01:03:42,207
(speaking foreign language)
1544
01:03:42,208 --> 01:03:43,042
- [Nancy] What's the matter?
1545
01:03:43,043 --> 01:03:46,708
(speaking foreign language)
1546
01:03:48,917 --> 01:03:49,750
- Oh, no.
1547
01:03:49,751 --> 01:03:51,166
Constable Pulford!
1548
01:03:51,167 --> 01:03:52,582
- He's after you for questioning!
1549
01:03:52,583 --> 01:03:53,542
- Oh, my God.
1550
01:03:53,543 --> 01:03:56,291
If I don't pull through,
the burial money's
1551
01:03:56,292 --> 01:03:57,332
under the bed.
1552
01:03:57,333 --> 01:03:58,167
- Come on, upstairs.
1553
01:03:58,168 --> 01:04:00,291
(knocking)
1554
01:04:00,292 --> 01:04:01,541
- I was in the middle of watering me beds.
1555
01:04:01,542 --> 01:04:02,375
- There are beds there.
1556
01:04:02,376 --> 01:04:04,041
Water those.
1557
01:04:04,042 --> 01:04:05,416
(knocking)
1558
01:04:05,417 --> 01:04:07,332
- Just a minute, Constable!
1559
01:04:07,333 --> 01:04:09,374
Get him into the kitchen.
1560
01:04:09,375 --> 01:04:12,042
(Laver singing)
1561
01:04:13,083 --> 01:04:14,666
- My lovely Nanny-wanny.
1562
01:04:14,667 --> 01:04:16,082
- Oh, Mr. Laver, please.
1563
01:04:16,083 --> 01:04:17,000
(whistles)
1564
01:04:17,000 --> 01:04:17,833
Oh!
1565
01:04:17,834 --> 01:04:20,874
(chuckles)
1566
01:04:20,875 --> 01:04:22,291
- Mr. Laver the reply to your message.
1567
01:04:22,292 --> 01:04:23,167
- Thank you, Commander.
1568
01:04:23,168 --> 01:04:25,291
(whistles)
1569
01:04:25,292 --> 01:04:26,499
- Oh!
1570
01:04:26,500 --> 01:04:27,500
- Thank you.
1571
01:04:28,500 --> 01:04:29,541
(knocking)
1572
01:04:29,542 --> 01:04:32,208
(Laver singing)
1573
01:04:34,208 --> 01:04:37,041
- I've been waiting quite some time,
1574
01:04:37,042 --> 01:04:38,416
look, Commander,
1575
01:04:38,417 --> 01:04:39,666
I've been down the local pub
1576
01:04:39,667 --> 01:04:41,124
and Hoskins is not there.
1577
01:04:41,125 --> 01:04:43,541
- No, he's gone back to his cottage.
1578
01:04:43,542 --> 01:04:45,666
- Thank you, sir.
1579
01:04:45,667 --> 01:04:47,041
I shouldn't let any of the
1580
01:04:47,042 --> 01:04:49,166
locals see you like that if I were you.
1581
01:04:49,167 --> 01:04:51,332
You being a naval man.
1582
01:04:51,333 --> 01:04:52,333
Mm-hm.
1583
01:04:59,417 --> 01:05:00,250
- Nancy!
1584
01:05:00,251 --> 01:05:02,500
(knocking)
1585
01:05:03,625 --> 01:05:04,666
- Laver here, sir.
1586
01:05:04,667 --> 01:05:06,417
The key's on its way.
1587
01:05:07,750 --> 01:05:09,374
- Operation Decoy.
1588
01:05:09,375 --> 01:05:10,250
How do I look?
1589
01:05:10,251 --> 01:05:11,374
- Very nice, but where?
1590
01:05:11,375 --> 01:05:12,333
What is-
1591
01:05:12,334 --> 01:05:14,166
- One orange, one lemon.
1592
01:05:14,167 --> 01:05:15,791
I'll get you one of my wigs.
1593
01:05:15,792 --> 01:05:16,874
- What do I need a wig for?
1594
01:05:16,875 --> 01:05:17,957
- To look like Rudi.
1595
01:05:17,958 --> 01:05:20,458
Come on, get your clothes off.
1596
01:05:21,958 --> 01:05:23,166
- Ah!
1597
01:05:23,167 --> 01:05:24,707
- There's a good boy.
1598
01:05:24,708 --> 01:05:26,125
Come on, you too!
1599
01:05:32,250 --> 01:05:33,291
And your trousers.
1600
01:05:33,292 --> 01:05:34,749
Come on!
1601
01:05:34,750 --> 01:05:35,625
Come along!
1602
01:05:35,626 --> 01:05:37,708
(laughs)
1603
01:05:39,167 --> 01:05:40,167
Oh!
1604
01:05:55,500 --> 01:05:57,667
- Gosh, they're versatile.
1605
01:06:00,208 --> 01:06:01,375
- Here we are.
1606
01:06:13,250 --> 01:06:14,250
- Oh!
1607
01:06:15,250 --> 01:06:17,291
(Rudi laughs)
1608
01:06:17,292 --> 01:06:18,541
- I see nothing funny.
1609
01:06:18,542 --> 01:06:20,332
(speaking foreign language)
1610
01:06:20,333 --> 01:06:21,167
What's he say?
1611
01:06:21,168 --> 01:06:22,791
- You're not standing where he is.
1612
01:06:22,792 --> 01:06:24,249
Now are you ready, Gerry?
1613
01:06:24,250 --> 01:06:25,791
- I suppose so.
1614
01:06:25,792 --> 01:06:27,541
- How's your fruit bra?
1615
01:06:27,542 --> 01:06:28,832
- It's lovely.
1616
01:06:28,833 --> 01:06:29,792
- We'll give you two minutes lead,
1617
01:06:29,793 --> 01:06:32,166
then we'll head for the village.
1618
01:06:32,167 --> 01:06:33,500
- Okay, darling?
1619
01:06:35,167 --> 01:06:36,083
- Good luck, darlings.
1620
01:06:36,084 --> 01:06:37,207
Ready?
1621
01:06:37,208 --> 01:06:38,292
- [Both] Yes.
1622
01:06:39,292 --> 01:06:40,749
- Oh!
1623
01:06:40,750 --> 01:06:41,750
Oh!
1624
01:06:43,458 --> 01:06:44,458
- Ha!
1625
01:06:45,458 --> 01:06:46,707
Yah!
1626
01:06:46,708 --> 01:06:47,583
Ah!
1627
01:06:47,583 --> 01:06:48,583
Ha!
1628
01:06:49,542 --> 01:06:50,792
- Madam, madam!
1629
01:06:58,125 --> 01:07:01,207
- What are you doing to my wife?
1630
01:07:01,208 --> 01:07:02,042
- Wife?
1631
01:07:02,043 --> 01:07:03,666
- She fainted, darling.
1632
01:07:03,667 --> 01:07:04,791
- Fainted darling?
1633
01:07:04,792 --> 01:07:05,957
Why?
1634
01:07:05,958 --> 01:07:06,792
- Well, she was there.
1635
01:07:06,792 --> 01:07:07,708
And so was I.
1636
01:07:07,709 --> 01:07:09,916
I was in a hurry, so I flashed it.
1637
01:07:09,917 --> 01:07:10,833
- Flashed it?
1638
01:07:10,833 --> 01:07:11,833
- Flashed by, I mean.
1639
01:07:11,834 --> 01:07:12,957
- How do you do?
1640
01:07:12,958 --> 01:07:13,792
I'm Mrs.-
1641
01:07:13,793 --> 01:07:16,332
- Why have you changed
clothes with Mr. Buss?
1642
01:07:16,333 --> 01:07:17,666
- That's a very good question.
1643
01:07:17,667 --> 01:07:18,583
- How do you do?
1644
01:07:18,583 --> 01:07:19,417
I'm Mrs.-
1645
01:07:19,417 --> 01:07:20,375
- What are you wearing that
1646
01:07:20,376 --> 01:07:21,582
thing on your head for?
1647
01:07:21,583 --> 01:07:22,749
- That's another very good one.
1648
01:07:22,750 --> 01:07:23,957
- We were playing charades.
1649
01:07:23,958 --> 01:07:24,792
- Oh!
1650
01:07:24,793 --> 01:07:25,957
Good afternoon, I'm-
- Charades?
1651
01:07:25,958 --> 01:07:27,582
- Yes, I was miming "You can
1652
01:07:27,583 --> 01:07:28,791
take a horse to water,
1653
01:07:28,792 --> 01:07:30,374
but a pencil must be lead.”
1654
01:07:30,375 --> 01:07:31,375
- What's that got to do
1655
01:07:31,376 --> 01:07:32,916
with you being dressed up like that?
1656
01:07:32,917 --> 01:07:33,917
- Nothing.
1657
01:07:33,918 --> 01:07:35,707
That's why she couldn't guess it.
1658
01:07:35,708 --> 01:07:37,582
- Are you all right, Mother?
1659
01:07:37,583 --> 01:07:38,417
- Well, dear-
1660
01:07:38,418 --> 01:07:39,874
- What the blazes are you miming?
1661
01:07:39,875 --> 01:07:41,416
- Oranges and lemons.
1662
01:07:41,417 --> 01:07:43,082
- Could I meet some of these people?
1663
01:07:43,083 --> 01:07:44,083
- Oranges?
1664
01:07:46,083 --> 01:07:47,541
Well, what do you mean
1665
01:07:47,542 --> 01:07:49,541
by locking me in my study?
1666
01:07:49,542 --> 01:07:50,666
Is that the damn silly
1667
01:07:50,667 --> 01:07:51,583
sort of thing you get
1668
01:07:51,584 --> 01:07:53,166
up to in the Polish government?
1669
01:07:53,167 --> 01:07:54,000
- Yes.
1670
01:07:54,001 --> 01:07:55,041
- How do you do?
1671
01:07:55,042 --> 01:07:56,499
I'm-
- You'll be all right, Janet.
1672
01:07:56,500 --> 01:07:58,207
- Yes, dear.
- You passed out, Mother.
1673
01:07:58,208 --> 01:08:00,916
- Who wouldn't, with Laver flashing it?
1674
01:08:00,917 --> 01:08:01,750
- Flashing it?
1675
01:08:01,750 --> 01:08:02,583
- Yes, come on, dear.
1676
01:08:02,583 --> 01:08:03,417
- I'd rather stay.
1677
01:08:03,417 --> 01:08:04,292
- I'll give you a hand, Commander.
1678
01:08:04,292 --> 01:08:05,125
- I don't believe-
1679
01:08:05,126 --> 01:08:06,832
- Father, where are you taking her?
1680
01:08:06,833 --> 01:08:07,667
- Upstairs, of course.
1681
01:08:07,668 --> 01:08:09,499
- You won't put her in
your bedroom, will you?
1682
01:08:09,500 --> 01:08:10,333
- Why not?
1683
01:08:10,334 --> 01:08:13,207
- Hoskins is in your bedroom.
1684
01:08:13,208 --> 01:08:16,124
- What is Hoskins doing in my bedroom?
1685
01:08:16,125 --> 01:08:18,666
- Very sad, he fell down the well.
1686
01:08:18,667 --> 01:08:19,667
- What well?
1687
01:08:19,668 --> 01:08:21,749
- The well in the garden.
1688
01:08:21,750 --> 01:08:24,416
- I didn't know there
was a well in the garden.
1689
01:08:24,417 --> 01:08:25,417
- Neither did Hoskins.
1690
01:08:25,418 --> 01:08:28,333
That's how he came to fall down it.
1691
01:08:29,292 --> 01:08:30,167
- Okay.
1692
01:08:30,167 --> 01:08:31,167
- Yes, well.
1693
01:08:31,168 --> 01:08:34,083
It's been so nice meeting everyone.
1694
01:08:35,125 --> 01:08:36,125
♪ Here we come ♪
1695
01:08:36,126 --> 01:08:37,166
♪ Loop de loo ♪
1696
01:08:37,167 --> 01:08:38,000
♪ Here we come ♪
1697
01:08:38,000 --> 01:08:38,833
♪ Loop de la ♪
1698
01:08:38,834 --> 01:08:39,999
♪ Oh, here we come ♪
1699
01:08:40,000 --> 01:08:41,000
♪ Loop de loo ♪
1700
01:08:41,001 --> 01:08:43,916
(humming)
1701
01:08:43,917 --> 01:08:44,917
- Comrade!
1702
01:08:46,083 --> 01:08:47,083
This way.
1703
01:08:50,292 --> 01:08:51,250
(whistles)
1704
01:08:51,251 --> 01:08:52,749
- Mr. Laver, the reply to your message.
1705
01:08:52,750 --> 01:08:53,583
- Oh, thank you.
1706
01:08:53,583 --> 01:08:54,417
Thank you, Commander.
1707
01:08:54,417 --> 01:08:55,333
And thank you, Commander,
1708
01:08:55,334 --> 01:08:56,749
for a simply super afternoon.
1709
01:08:56,750 --> 01:08:58,041
- Don't mention it.
1710
01:08:58,042 --> 01:08:59,124
- And now, I'm going.
1711
01:08:59,125 --> 01:09:00,207
- Splendid.
1712
01:09:00,208 --> 01:09:01,208
- To faint.
1713
01:09:02,667 --> 01:09:04,041
- What are you doing now?
1714
01:09:04,042 --> 01:09:04,958
- What do you think we're doing?
1715
01:09:04,959 --> 01:09:06,291
We fancy each other.
1716
01:09:06,292 --> 01:09:07,332
- I'll see if I can find
1717
01:09:07,333 --> 01:09:09,291
the smelling salts, my dear.
1718
01:09:09,292 --> 01:09:12,208
- [Janet] Who are all those people?
1719
01:09:13,458 --> 01:09:14,417
- You are lucky you didn't
1720
01:09:14,418 --> 01:09:16,167
break your damn neck.
1721
01:09:22,542 --> 01:09:23,542
Nancy!
1722
01:09:24,583 --> 01:09:28,333
- He mustn't see Laver,
he thinks I'm Laver.
1723
01:09:30,167 --> 01:09:33,666
- Smelling salts should do the trick.
1724
01:09:33,667 --> 01:09:35,207
Ah.
1725
01:09:35,208 --> 01:09:38,207
You're still here then, Laver.
1726
01:09:38,208 --> 01:09:39,541
- Just stretching my legs.
1727
01:09:39,542 --> 01:09:40,542
- Yes.
1728
01:09:41,333 --> 01:09:42,750
- How's the wife?
1729
01:09:43,917 --> 01:09:45,250
- She's all, uh,
1730
01:09:52,500 --> 01:09:53,917
I'll see if I can
1731
01:09:55,083 --> 01:09:57,083
find the smelling salts.
1732
01:10:01,542 --> 01:10:03,542
(yawns)
1733
01:10:14,125 --> 01:10:15,875
- Well done, darling.
1734
01:10:17,792 --> 01:10:21,624
- Let's get Rimmington out of the way.
1735
01:10:21,625 --> 01:10:23,457
He's busted the lock.
1736
01:10:23,458 --> 01:10:25,708
(knocking)
1737
01:10:27,042 --> 01:10:29,957
Keep everybody in the kitchen.
1738
01:10:29,958 --> 01:10:31,166
Come on, you!
1739
01:10:31,167 --> 01:10:32,000
(moans)
1740
01:10:32,000 --> 01:10:33,000
Upsy-daisy
1741
01:10:35,583 --> 01:10:36,999
- Nancy!
1742
01:10:37,000 --> 01:10:39,083
This door's locked again!
1743
01:10:42,708 --> 01:10:43,708
Nancy!
1744
01:10:44,375 --> 01:10:46,292
- Just one moment, sir.
1745
01:10:50,750 --> 01:10:53,000
(knocking)
1746
01:11:00,750 --> 01:11:02,750
(blows)
1747
01:11:30,417 --> 01:11:32,416
- Isn't this a lovely shirt?
1748
01:11:32,417 --> 01:11:33,916
- This is serious, sir.
1749
01:11:33,917 --> 01:11:34,750
I cannot find Hoskins
1750
01:11:34,751 --> 01:11:36,249
in his cottage or anywhere.
1751
01:11:36,250 --> 01:11:37,916
Either he's helping this Russian bloke,
1752
01:11:37,917 --> 01:11:40,166
or this Russian bloke has done him in.
1753
01:11:40,167 --> 01:11:43,374
(book thudding)
Eh?
1754
01:11:43,375 --> 01:11:44,624
Beans for lunch.
1755
01:11:44,625 --> 01:11:45,749
Terribly sorry.
1756
01:11:45,750 --> 01:11:46,917
Tell you what.
1757
01:11:47,792 --> 01:11:48,625
- What?
1758
01:11:48,626 --> 01:11:51,458
- Why don't we look in the garden?
1759
01:11:59,125 --> 01:12:00,125
- Gerry.
1760
01:12:01,125 --> 01:12:02,666
Where is everybody?
1761
01:12:02,667 --> 01:12:04,707
(speaking foreign language)
1762
01:12:04,708 --> 01:12:05,583
- Don't panic, darling.
1763
01:12:05,584 --> 01:12:09,582
(speaking foreign language)
1764
01:12:09,583 --> 01:12:10,417
Sh!
1765
01:12:10,418 --> 01:12:11,541
We'll leave as soon as we can!
1766
01:12:11,542 --> 01:12:13,374
(speaking foreign language)
1767
01:12:13,375 --> 01:12:14,250
- Quiet!
1768
01:12:14,251 --> 01:12:16,916
(speaking foreign language)
1769
01:12:16,917 --> 01:12:18,250
Please be quiet.
1770
01:12:19,458 --> 01:12:21,957
(speaking foreign language)
1771
01:12:21,958 --> 01:12:22,792
Rudi!
1772
01:12:22,793 --> 01:12:25,999
Russian embassy men are still there.
1773
01:12:26,000 --> 01:12:27,374
- [Rudi] Embassy?
1774
01:12:27,375 --> 01:12:28,208
- [Nancy] Yes.
1775
01:12:28,209 --> 01:12:29,874
- [Barbara] Let's have a
little think, Rudi, darling.
1776
01:12:29,875 --> 01:12:32,082
(speaking foreign language)
1777
01:12:32,083 --> 01:12:33,167
- [Nancy] Sh!
1778
01:12:34,542 --> 01:12:37,457
- Mrs. Rimmington's
hairdresser's talking in Russian.
1779
01:12:37,458 --> 01:12:38,666
- [Barbara] Quiet, Rudi.
1780
01:12:38,667 --> 01:12:39,667
- Rudi!
1781
01:12:40,833 --> 01:12:42,332
The Russian defective,
1782
01:12:42,333 --> 01:12:45,166
posing as Mrs. Rimmington's hairdresser.
1783
01:12:45,167 --> 01:12:47,374
And Nanny Wanny's in on it too.
1784
01:12:47,375 --> 01:12:48,916
(speaking foreign language)
1785
01:12:48,917 --> 01:12:50,707
Laver, this could mean your knighthood.
1786
01:12:50,708 --> 01:12:52,958
(knocking)
1787
01:13:03,958 --> 01:13:05,292
- Coming, Janet!
1788
01:13:10,250 --> 01:13:11,666
- Commander.
1789
01:13:11,667 --> 01:13:14,333
I must, must find the Commander.
1790
01:13:15,458 --> 01:13:16,999
The front door.
1791
01:13:17,000 --> 01:13:18,917
Where's the front door?
1792
01:13:21,167 --> 01:13:22,457
Ah.
1793
01:13:22,458 --> 01:13:23,458
Commander!
1794
01:13:24,292 --> 01:13:25,292
Commander!
1795
01:13:26,583 --> 01:13:27,583
Oh!
1796
01:13:31,958 --> 01:13:33,082
- But Constable, I can't
1797
01:13:33,083 --> 01:13:34,000
really believe that any harm
1798
01:13:34,001 --> 01:13:35,957
has come to Hoskins.
1799
01:13:35,958 --> 01:13:37,582
- You don't seem very
perturbed that Hoskins
1800
01:13:37,583 --> 01:13:38,749
can't be found.
1801
01:13:38,750 --> 01:13:41,166
And it is urgent I talk to Hoskins, sir.
1802
01:13:41,167 --> 01:13:43,416
If the poor old boy is still alive.
1803
01:13:43,417 --> 01:13:45,249
- Well, he's, get back!
1804
01:13:45,250 --> 01:13:46,250
- Beg your pardon?
1805
01:13:46,251 --> 01:13:48,166
- I said did you get back?
1806
01:13:48,167 --> 01:13:49,000
- Get back?
1807
01:13:49,000 --> 01:13:50,000
From where?
1808
01:13:50,001 --> 01:13:51,874
- From where you've been.
1809
01:13:51,875 --> 01:13:52,833
- I haven't been.
1810
01:13:52,834 --> 01:13:54,082
- You haven't been?
1811
01:13:54,083 --> 01:13:55,417
You should have.
1812
01:13:56,250 --> 01:13:57,499
- Are you gonna help me
1813
01:13:57,500 --> 01:13:58,541
with my inquiries or not?
1814
01:13:58,542 --> 01:13:59,542
- No!
1815
01:14:00,625 --> 01:14:01,625
- No?
1816
01:14:02,875 --> 01:14:05,082
What do you mean, no?
1817
01:14:05,083 --> 01:14:06,291
- No, I'm not going
1818
01:14:06,292 --> 01:14:07,457
to help you with your inquiries.
1819
01:14:07,458 --> 01:14:11,958
(shouting)
(crashing)
1820
01:14:14,375 --> 01:14:17,291
- I fell out of the bedroom window.
1821
01:14:17,292 --> 01:14:18,292
- Hoskins.
1822
01:14:24,250 --> 01:14:26,707
What was the gardener
doing in the bedroom?
1823
01:14:26,708 --> 01:14:29,541
- Putting some late seeds to bed.
1824
01:14:29,542 --> 01:14:31,124
- You must think I'm a perfect idiot.
1825
01:14:31,125 --> 01:14:32,249
- No, Constable.
1826
01:14:32,250 --> 01:14:33,667
Nobody's perfect.
1827
01:14:38,000 --> 01:14:41,082
(speaking foreign language)
1828
01:14:41,083 --> 01:14:41,917
Sh!
1829
01:14:41,918 --> 01:14:43,416
♪ All things bright ♪
1830
01:14:43,417 --> 01:14:45,499
♪ And beautiful ♪
1831
01:14:45,500 --> 01:14:47,624
♪ All creatures large ♪
1832
01:14:47,625 --> 01:14:48,707
♪ And small ♪
1833
01:14:48,708 --> 01:14:49,542
- Mr. Laver.
1834
01:14:49,543 --> 01:14:50,666
♪ All things big ♪
1835
01:14:50,667 --> 01:14:52,082
♪ And beautiful ♪
1836
01:14:52,083 --> 01:14:53,291
♪ Tooty-fruity ♪
1837
01:14:53,292 --> 01:14:55,957
- Will you pull yourself together?
1838
01:14:55,958 --> 01:14:56,875
- Nancy.
1839
01:14:56,876 --> 01:14:58,124
- Father!
1840
01:14:58,125 --> 01:14:58,958
- Ah!
1841
01:14:58,958 --> 01:14:59,917
- Go!
1842
01:14:59,918 --> 01:15:01,374
Quick!
1843
01:15:01,375 --> 01:15:05,042
(speaking foreign language)
1844
01:15:07,792 --> 01:15:09,124
- It's a menage a trois.
1845
01:15:09,125 --> 01:15:11,249
(chuckles)
1846
01:15:11,250 --> 01:15:14,917
(speaking foreign language)
1847
01:15:16,375 --> 01:15:19,875
- Something damned fishy going on in here.
1848
01:15:20,833 --> 01:15:21,833
Hoskins!
1849
01:15:21,834 --> 01:15:24,207
What are you playing at?
1850
01:15:24,208 --> 01:15:27,292
Pulford, what the blazes is, Pulford!
1851
01:15:29,625 --> 01:15:31,292
- Anyone for tennis?
1852
01:15:37,875 --> 01:15:38,875
- Cooo-ee.
1853
01:15:45,500 --> 01:15:46,833
Anyone at homey?
1854
01:16:01,750 --> 01:16:04,167
(bell dings)
1855
01:16:07,958 --> 01:16:09,457
- Hello?
1856
01:16:09,458 --> 01:16:10,542
Wrong number.
1857
01:16:19,000 --> 01:16:20,000
- Good afternoon.
1858
01:16:20,000 --> 01:16:20,833
How are you?
1859
01:16:20,834 --> 01:16:23,000
The drinks are over there.
1860
01:16:26,500 --> 01:16:27,500
- Hello.
1861
01:16:28,833 --> 01:16:29,750
- I'm sorry, Mrs. Rimmington.
1862
01:16:29,751 --> 01:16:30,874
You startled me.
1863
01:16:30,875 --> 01:16:32,832
- Mr. Hargreaves, isn't it?
1864
01:16:32,833 --> 01:16:34,374
- Yes, from next door.
1865
01:16:34,375 --> 01:16:36,082
- Anything I can do for you?
1866
01:16:36,083 --> 01:16:38,291
- Well, I don't wish
to interrupt the party.
1867
01:16:38,292 --> 01:16:39,167
- Party?
1868
01:16:39,168 --> 01:16:41,249
♪ Good King Wenceslas last looked out ♪
1869
01:16:41,250 --> 01:16:42,083
- Sh!
1870
01:16:42,084 --> 01:16:44,832
♪ On the feast of Stephen ♪
1871
01:16:44,833 --> 01:16:46,541
♪ When the snow lay ♪
1872
01:16:46,542 --> 01:16:47,957
♪ Round about ♪
1873
01:16:47,958 --> 01:16:51,042
♪ Deep and crisp and ♪
1874
01:16:54,917 --> 01:16:55,917
- Hello.
1875
01:17:05,750 --> 01:17:07,167
- Is he with you?
1876
01:17:08,667 --> 01:17:11,500
Maybe a friend of the Commander's.
1877
01:17:12,500 --> 01:17:14,499
- Certainly a friend of
the Commander's whiskey.
1878
01:17:14,500 --> 01:17:15,874
(moans)
1879
01:17:15,875 --> 01:17:16,708
- Here.
1880
01:17:16,709 --> 01:17:18,041
Breathe in.
1881
01:17:18,042 --> 01:17:21,416
(sniffs)
(gasps)
1882
01:17:21,417 --> 01:17:22,457
(panting)
1883
01:17:22,458 --> 01:17:25,416
(inhales)
(sneezes)
1884
01:17:25,417 --> 01:17:26,417
Bless you.
1885
01:17:28,333 --> 01:17:29,917
- He went that way.
1886
01:17:31,917 --> 01:17:32,917
(moans)
1887
01:17:32,918 --> 01:17:35,124
- I think perhaps black
coffee might do the trick.
1888
01:17:35,125 --> 01:17:35,958
- Can I get it?
1889
01:17:35,958 --> 01:17:36,792
- Oh, could you?
1890
01:17:36,793 --> 01:17:38,041
The kitchen's through there.
1891
01:17:38,042 --> 01:17:41,999
And the coffee's in a tin marked rice.
1892
01:17:42,000 --> 01:17:43,082
(bell dings)
1893
01:17:43,083 --> 01:17:45,541
- Wish I had a bell like that.
1894
01:17:45,542 --> 01:17:48,042
(Laver moans)
1895
01:17:50,125 --> 01:17:51,582
- It'll be all right.
1896
01:17:51,583 --> 01:17:52,583
- Oh, dear.
1897
01:17:53,375 --> 01:17:54,874
Do I know you, madam?
1898
01:17:54,875 --> 01:17:56,166
- No, I don't think so.
1899
01:17:56,167 --> 01:17:57,707
I'm Mrs. Rimmington.
1900
01:17:57,708 --> 01:17:59,832
- Mrs., are you the Mrs. Rimmington
1901
01:17:59,833 --> 01:18:01,666
who rang from the station?
1902
01:18:01,667 --> 01:18:02,707
- Yes, that's right.
1903
01:18:02,708 --> 01:18:03,542
- It's quite all right.
1904
01:18:03,543 --> 01:18:05,457
The Commander's told me all about you.
1905
01:18:05,458 --> 01:18:06,292
- I see.
1906
01:18:06,292 --> 01:18:07,125
- Yes.
1907
01:18:07,125 --> 01:18:08,083
Naughty girl.
1908
01:18:08,084 --> 01:18:09,499
(laughs)
1909
01:18:09,500 --> 01:18:10,333
In fact, the matter is your bit
1910
01:18:10,334 --> 01:18:12,082
of how's your father will have to wait.
1911
01:18:12,083 --> 01:18:12,917
- Will it?
1912
01:18:12,917 --> 01:18:13,792
- There's something going on
1913
01:18:13,793 --> 01:18:15,374
here in which you mustn't get involved.
1914
01:18:15,375 --> 01:18:16,250
- Really?
1915
01:18:16,251 --> 01:18:18,207
- You don't know about Red Rudi, do you?
1916
01:18:18,208 --> 01:18:19,416
- No.
1917
01:18:19,417 --> 01:18:20,582
- Nor the nanny.
1918
01:18:20,583 --> 01:18:21,916
- The nanny?
1919
01:18:21,917 --> 01:18:23,541
- I think she's an agent.
1920
01:18:23,542 --> 01:18:24,542
- She?
1921
01:18:24,543 --> 01:18:25,749
Travel or state?
1922
01:18:25,750 --> 01:18:26,583
- Secret.
1923
01:18:26,584 --> 01:18:28,249
- Oh, come on, you can tell me.
1924
01:18:28,250 --> 01:18:29,499
(door opens)
1925
01:18:29,500 --> 01:18:30,333
- Quick!
1926
01:18:30,333 --> 01:18:31,333
Down!
1927
01:18:32,250 --> 01:18:34,417
(moaning)
1928
01:18:35,375 --> 01:18:36,292
- Please, please.
1929
01:18:36,293 --> 01:18:37,624
Don't get excited.
1930
01:18:37,625 --> 01:18:39,541
Don't get excited!
1931
01:18:39,542 --> 01:18:40,542
- Oh, yes.
1932
01:18:42,208 --> 01:18:43,749
- Constable!
1933
01:18:43,750 --> 01:18:46,374
Madam, get away as quickly as possible.
1934
01:18:46,375 --> 01:18:48,124
It will all be in the
Sunday papers tomorrow.
1935
01:18:48,125 --> 01:18:49,000
You little sexpot.
1936
01:18:49,000 --> 01:18:49,833
(whistles)
1937
01:18:49,833 --> 01:18:50,667
Constable?
1938
01:18:50,667 --> 01:18:51,625
- Mr. Hargreaves.
1939
01:18:51,625 --> 01:18:52,458
- [Pulford] Constable!
1940
01:18:52,459 --> 01:18:53,875
- Mr. Hargreaves!
1941
01:18:55,833 --> 01:18:58,749
(wheezing)
1942
01:18:58,750 --> 01:19:00,707
(light orchestral music)
1943
01:19:00,708 --> 01:19:01,708
- Whee!
1944
01:19:05,333 --> 01:19:07,583
(groaning)
1945
01:19:11,917 --> 01:19:14,291
(moaning)
1946
01:19:14,292 --> 01:19:15,250
- You'll find some cakes
1947
01:19:15,251 --> 01:19:17,917
in the cupboard, Mr. Hargreaves.
1948
01:19:21,000 --> 01:19:23,041
Oh, good afternoon, Constable.
1949
01:19:23,042 --> 01:19:25,082
- It is not a good afternoon, madam.
1950
01:19:25,083 --> 01:19:26,083
Now madam, I will trouble you
1951
01:19:26,083 --> 01:19:26,917
for your name, please.
1952
01:19:26,917 --> 01:19:27,750
- Certainly.
1953
01:19:27,751 --> 01:19:28,832
I'm Mrs. Rimmington.
1954
01:19:28,833 --> 01:19:29,917
- Rimmington,
1955
01:19:31,292 --> 01:19:32,416
I don't care about the marital
1956
01:19:32,417 --> 01:19:33,707
arrangements in this place.
1957
01:19:33,708 --> 01:19:35,332
- Marital arrangements?
1958
01:19:35,333 --> 01:19:36,374
- My report for this case
1959
01:19:36,375 --> 01:19:37,707
will look like a script
1960
01:19:37,708 --> 01:19:39,499
for a dirty, blue film.
1961
01:19:39,500 --> 01:19:40,749
- I think you'd better
1962
01:19:40,750 --> 01:19:41,667
explain yourself, Constable.
1963
01:19:41,668 --> 01:19:43,333
- Me explain myself?
1964
01:19:44,208 --> 01:19:46,041
My wife's all for a bit of fun.
1965
01:19:46,042 --> 01:19:47,624
But even she would be
horrified if she knew
1966
01:19:47,625 --> 01:19:49,332
that the Commander's mistresses
1967
01:19:49,333 --> 01:19:50,167
looks on while he beats
1968
01:19:50,168 --> 01:19:52,249
his wife three times
every day after meals.
1969
01:19:52,250 --> 01:19:53,250
- What?
1970
01:19:53,251 --> 01:19:56,417
- Now who fancies a nice, little tart?
1971
01:19:59,708 --> 01:20:01,708
- Who the hell are you?
1972
01:20:02,542 --> 01:20:04,166
- Constable, do I gather
that you have met another
1973
01:20:04,167 --> 01:20:05,582
Mrs. Rimmington here?
1974
01:20:05,583 --> 01:20:06,916
- Indeed I have, madam.
1975
01:20:06,917 --> 01:20:07,917
A little blonde thing
1976
01:20:07,918 --> 01:20:09,916
with a neckline plunging
down to her naval.
1977
01:20:09,917 --> 01:20:12,374
I don't care if I have
to put my foot in it.
1978
01:20:12,375 --> 01:20:14,499
I am trying to uncover a Communist plot
1979
01:20:14,500 --> 01:20:17,083
and not a pornographic love-in.
1980
01:20:22,333 --> 01:20:25,333
- Hello, darling.
1981
01:20:28,208 --> 01:20:29,708
- Janet, old girl.
1982
01:20:31,875 --> 01:20:32,958
Janet, Janet!
1983
01:20:36,458 --> 01:20:37,292
Janet.
1984
01:20:37,292 --> 01:20:38,125
- No!
1985
01:20:38,125 --> 01:20:38,958
- Janet!
1986
01:20:38,959 --> 01:20:40,041
- I'm not listening!
1987
01:20:40,042 --> 01:20:41,542
- Janet, old girl!
1988
01:20:44,875 --> 01:20:45,875
- Helloy?
1989
01:20:47,833 --> 01:20:48,833
Helloy?
1990
01:20:54,500 --> 01:20:55,500
- Helloy?
1991
01:20:57,917 --> 01:20:58,917
Helloy?
1992
01:21:05,417 --> 01:21:06,707
- What did you do that for?
1993
01:21:06,708 --> 01:21:09,624
- I don't know, I thought
he said the password.
1994
01:21:09,625 --> 01:21:10,791
- What the devil's going on?
1995
01:21:10,792 --> 01:21:12,457
- No trick questions, please.
1996
01:21:12,458 --> 01:21:13,458
- Now isn't the time.
1997
01:21:13,458 --> 01:21:14,417
Everybody's chasing everybody else.
1998
01:21:14,418 --> 01:21:16,374
You, that way.
1999
01:21:16,375 --> 01:21:18,249
(speaking foreign language)
2000
01:21:18,250 --> 01:21:19,291
There's no time for that!
2001
01:21:19,292 --> 01:21:20,292
Go on!
2002
01:21:20,292 --> 01:21:21,125
You, go with him.
2003
01:21:21,125 --> 01:21:22,125
We'll go this way as decoys, come on.
2004
01:21:22,125 --> 01:21:22,958
- Good luck, darlings.
2005
01:21:22,959 --> 01:21:25,125
- I'm government security!
2006
01:21:30,667 --> 01:21:32,416
- I don't feel very well.
2007
01:21:32,417 --> 01:21:33,457
- Right.
2008
01:21:33,458 --> 01:21:35,624
Everybody stay where they are.
2009
01:21:35,625 --> 01:21:36,666
- The Commander's apprehended
2010
01:21:36,667 --> 01:21:37,957
Mrs. Rimmington and the nanny.
2011
01:21:37,958 --> 01:21:39,499
Well done, Commander Rimmington.
2012
01:21:39,500 --> 01:21:41,082
- That is not Commander Rimmington.
2013
01:21:41,083 --> 01:21:43,124
That is Commander ahem.
2014
01:21:43,125 --> 01:21:44,125
- That's Mr. Buss.
2015
01:21:44,125 --> 01:21:44,958
- [Pulford] Who?
2016
01:21:44,958 --> 01:21:45,792
- Mr. Buss.
2017
01:21:45,793 --> 01:21:47,291
Look, I'm willing to confess everything.
2018
01:21:47,292 --> 01:21:48,125
- Hey!
2019
01:21:48,125 --> 01:21:48,958
Come back!
2020
01:21:48,959 --> 01:21:50,208
Stop that Buss!
2021
01:21:54,333 --> 01:21:56,207
- She's the Liberal candidate, darling.
2022
01:21:56,208 --> 01:21:58,957
- I don't believe a word of it, darling.
2023
01:21:58,958 --> 01:22:00,374
(loud banging)
2024
01:22:00,375 --> 01:22:01,708
- What was that?
2025
01:22:02,917 --> 01:22:06,082
(birds chirping)
2026
01:22:06,083 --> 01:22:08,541
- The clock in the kitchen.
2027
01:22:08,542 --> 01:22:10,624
- But we haven't got a
clock in the kitchen.
2028
01:22:10,625 --> 01:22:14,124
- Well, it's about time we had one then.
2029
01:22:14,125 --> 01:22:16,332
- You're as daft as your mother here.
2030
01:22:16,333 --> 01:22:17,416
- You never told me
2031
01:22:17,417 --> 01:22:19,999
you were the au pair girl's mother.
2032
01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:23,041
- Would you kindly just say who you are?
2033
01:22:23,042 --> 01:22:24,166
- She's Mrs. Rimmington.
2034
01:22:24,167 --> 01:22:25,291
- Oh!
2035
01:22:25,292 --> 01:22:26,832
(sputters)
2036
01:22:26,833 --> 01:22:28,082
- I'll get to the bottom of it.
2037
01:22:28,083 --> 01:22:29,083
- What?
2038
01:22:29,083 --> 01:22:30,083
Oh!
2039
01:22:30,833 --> 01:22:32,332
- I would like to know something.
2040
01:22:32,333 --> 01:22:33,167
- Yes.
2041
01:22:33,168 --> 01:22:34,582
- [Both] Who the devil are you?
2042
01:22:34,583 --> 01:22:38,250
(speaking foreign language)
2043
01:22:41,000 --> 01:22:42,124
- Ah, Red Rudi.
2044
01:22:42,125 --> 01:22:44,124
- Yes, my future son-in-law.
2045
01:22:44,125 --> 01:22:44,958
- What?
2046
01:22:44,959 --> 01:22:48,625
(speaking foreign language)
2047
01:22:51,125 --> 01:22:52,125
- I can't speak Russian,
2048
01:22:52,126 --> 01:22:53,791
but I reckon he's fallen in my compost.
2049
01:22:53,792 --> 01:22:57,458
(speaking foreign language)
2050
01:23:00,792 --> 01:23:01,625
- Silence.
2051
01:23:01,626 --> 01:23:03,207
Move along, please, move along.
2052
01:23:03,208 --> 01:23:05,792
(all shouting)
2053
01:23:07,000 --> 01:23:09,333
(muttering)
2054
01:23:13,875 --> 01:23:16,291
- You're not Pulford, are you?
2055
01:23:16,292 --> 01:23:17,457
- No.
2056
01:23:17,458 --> 01:23:18,916
- Are you?
2057
01:23:18,917 --> 01:23:19,750
- No.
2058
01:23:19,751 --> 01:23:20,832
- You're not Pulford.
2059
01:23:20,833 --> 01:23:22,499
- No, I'm looking for this
2060
01:23:22,500 --> 01:23:23,791
gentleman over here.
2061
01:23:23,792 --> 01:23:25,374
(speaking foreign language)
2062
01:23:25,375 --> 01:23:26,375
- Oh!
2063
01:23:29,875 --> 01:23:30,875
- Ah!
2064
01:23:33,208 --> 01:23:34,208
- Right.
2065
01:23:34,958 --> 01:23:38,542
Which one of you jokers
pinched my uniform?
2066
01:23:40,542 --> 01:23:41,542
Come on.
2067
01:23:42,458 --> 01:23:43,458
Fall in.
2068
01:23:44,167 --> 01:23:45,999
Move yourselves!
2069
01:23:46,000 --> 01:23:47,957
(muttering)
2070
01:23:47,958 --> 01:23:48,792
Right.
2071
01:23:48,793 --> 01:23:50,542
That is more like it.
2072
01:23:53,083 --> 01:23:54,832
Now then, Mrs. Rimmington.
2073
01:23:54,833 --> 01:23:57,082
You got some explaining to do.
2074
01:23:57,083 --> 01:23:58,582
And your nanny.
2075
01:23:58,583 --> 01:23:59,417
- Nanny?
2076
01:23:59,417 --> 01:24:00,250
Mrs. Rimmington?
2077
01:24:00,251 --> 01:24:01,624
- May I ask who you are, sir?
2078
01:24:01,625 --> 01:24:03,291
- I'm Commander Rimmington.
2079
01:24:03,292 --> 01:24:04,332
- You're an imposter.
2080
01:24:04,333 --> 01:24:05,624
- You're mad.
2081
01:24:05,625 --> 01:24:06,625
Who are you?
2082
01:24:10,917 --> 01:24:11,792
"It is your birthday.
2083
01:24:11,793 --> 01:24:14,792
Collect 10 pounds from each player."
2084
01:24:16,083 --> 01:24:16,917
- Laver.
2085
01:24:16,918 --> 01:24:18,041
Security.
2086
01:24:18,042 --> 01:24:19,874
- You're not Laver.
2087
01:24:19,875 --> 01:24:21,041
Constable, arrest this man.
2088
01:24:21,042 --> 01:24:21,917
- You must be in league
2089
01:24:21,918 --> 01:24:23,082
with Red Rudi and the nanny.
2090
01:24:23,083 --> 01:24:24,957
- The nanny is my daughter.
2091
01:24:24,958 --> 01:24:26,582
Red Rudi is my future son-in-law.
2092
01:24:26,583 --> 01:24:27,999
- That's as good as a confession.
2093
01:24:28,000 --> 01:24:29,041
Constable, arrest most of these people.
2094
01:24:29,042 --> 01:24:29,875
- Shut up!
2095
01:24:29,875 --> 01:24:30,708
- I must speak!
2096
01:24:30,709 --> 01:24:33,957
- You know what's going to
happen to you, don't you?
2097
01:24:33,958 --> 01:24:34,958
- Yes.
2098
01:24:43,958 --> 01:24:46,082
- Where's the bloke
what pinched my uniform?
2099
01:24:46,083 --> 01:24:47,207
Go on!
2100
01:24:47,208 --> 01:24:49,541
(blows whistle)
2101
01:24:49,542 --> 01:24:50,542
- Hey!
2102
01:24:53,292 --> 01:24:54,292
Come back!
2103
01:24:55,875 --> 01:24:56,999
- Pulford!
2104
01:24:57,000 --> 01:24:58,667
You trod on my sofa!
2105
01:25:00,292 --> 01:25:01,125
- Right.
2106
01:25:01,126 --> 01:25:02,458
Operation Decoy.
2107
01:25:06,542 --> 01:25:08,124
Nancy.
2108
01:25:08,125 --> 01:25:10,708
Just give us 10 seconds' start.
2109
01:25:16,125 --> 01:25:18,292
(sobbing)
2110
01:25:23,833 --> 01:25:25,582
- We go now.
2111
01:25:25,583 --> 01:25:27,582
(speaking foreign language)
2112
01:25:27,583 --> 01:25:30,291
Pull yourself together, Rudi.
2113
01:25:30,292 --> 01:25:33,582
(speaking foreign language)
2114
01:25:33,583 --> 01:25:35,582
Darling, we've got to make a run for it.
2115
01:25:35,583 --> 01:25:36,542
- No!
2116
01:25:36,543 --> 01:25:39,332
- But you can't stay here.
2117
01:25:39,333 --> 01:25:41,000
- Me go back Russia!
2118
01:25:42,542 --> 01:25:43,666
- Russia?
2119
01:25:43,667 --> 01:25:44,500
- Yeah!
2120
01:25:44,500 --> 01:25:45,458
- What about me?
2121
01:25:45,458 --> 01:25:46,333
- You, you.
2122
01:25:46,334 --> 01:25:48,583
(grunting)
2123
01:25:51,417 --> 01:25:53,166
- What bloody sauce!
2124
01:25:53,167 --> 01:25:55,291
I'm glad I found out about you in time.
2125
01:25:55,292 --> 01:25:57,499
You need a good kick up the Kremlin.
2126
01:25:57,500 --> 01:25:58,333
- It's worked.
2127
01:25:58,334 --> 01:26:00,249
The Russians are after me.
2128
01:26:00,250 --> 01:26:01,916
You're supposed to be on your way!
2129
01:26:01,917 --> 01:26:03,499
- He's going back to Russia.
2130
01:26:03,500 --> 01:26:04,832
- What?
2131
01:26:04,833 --> 01:26:06,457
After all we've been through?
2132
01:26:06,458 --> 01:26:08,166
After I've convinced them I'm Petrovyan?
2133
01:26:08,167 --> 01:26:11,207
(speaking foreign language)
2134
01:26:11,208 --> 01:26:12,832
- Oh, I'm sorry, darling.
2135
01:26:12,833 --> 01:26:14,207
I think I'll just stick
2136
01:26:14,208 --> 01:26:17,416
to nice, sexy businessmen in the future.
2137
01:26:17,417 --> 01:26:18,250
- Come on, Gerry!
2138
01:26:18,250 --> 01:26:19,083
- It's all right.
2139
01:26:19,083 --> 01:26:20,000
There's no need to run.
2140
01:26:20,000 --> 01:26:21,000
It's all over.
2141
01:26:21,000 --> 01:26:22,000
He's going back.
2142
01:26:22,000 --> 01:26:22,833
- What?
2143
01:26:22,834 --> 01:26:24,707
(sobbing)
2144
01:26:24,708 --> 01:26:26,374
Come on, Gerry.
2145
01:26:26,375 --> 01:26:27,375
- Where are we going?
2146
01:26:27,376 --> 01:26:29,041
- To a nice, quiet hotel.
2147
01:26:29,042 --> 01:26:30,541
- Darling, I couldn't possibly.
2148
01:26:30,542 --> 01:26:31,625
Yes, I could.
2149
01:26:33,250 --> 01:26:34,374
- What about me?
2150
01:26:34,375 --> 01:26:37,792
(light orchestral music)
2151
01:26:41,208 --> 01:26:42,707
Hey, there might be
2152
01:26:42,708 --> 01:26:45,582
some nice, sexy businessmen in that hotel.
2153
01:26:45,583 --> 01:26:49,000
(light orchestral music)
2154
01:26:50,583 --> 01:26:53,582
(door slamming)
2155
01:26:53,583 --> 01:26:55,166
- Constable.
2156
01:26:55,167 --> 01:26:56,707
Commander.
2157
01:26:56,708 --> 01:26:57,708
Constable.
2158
01:26:59,542 --> 01:27:01,041
- Constable!
2159
01:27:01,042 --> 01:27:02,124
Ah!
2160
01:27:02,125 --> 01:27:03,291
Commander!
2161
01:27:03,292 --> 01:27:04,832
Ah!
2162
01:27:04,833 --> 01:27:08,041
- There'll always be an England.
2163
01:27:08,042 --> 01:27:09,042
- Oh!
2164
01:27:09,750 --> 01:27:10,750
Ooh!
2165
01:27:14,458 --> 01:27:15,458
Oooh.
2166
01:27:39,917 --> 01:27:41,082
- I live next door.
2167
01:27:41,083 --> 01:27:41,917
- Shut up!
2168
01:27:41,917 --> 01:27:42,750
- I'm Bobby Hargreaves!
2169
01:27:42,750 --> 01:27:43,708
- Shut up!
2170
01:27:43,708 --> 01:27:44,583
- I want to go home!
2171
01:27:44,583 --> 01:27:45,583
- Shut up!
2172
01:27:49,625 --> 01:27:50,458
Hoskins!
2173
01:27:50,458 --> 01:27:51,458
- Huh?
2174
01:27:53,125 --> 01:27:54,374
- I want you, Hoskins!
2175
01:27:54,375 --> 01:27:55,375
- Oh!
2176
01:27:57,875 --> 01:27:59,416
Oil
2177
01:27:59,417 --> 01:28:00,333
- [Constable] Stop!
2178
01:28:00,334 --> 01:28:01,582
- The law's after me!
2179
01:28:01,583 --> 01:28:02,791
- I said stop!
2180
01:28:02,792 --> 01:28:03,625
Stop!
2181
01:28:03,625 --> 01:28:04,625
Hoskins!
2182
01:28:10,625 --> 01:28:12,625
That vehicle, you drive!
2183
01:28:16,750 --> 01:28:18,749
Follow that gardener!
2184
01:28:18,750 --> 01:28:22,417
(speaking foreign language)
2185
01:28:23,250 --> 01:28:24,250
- I can't drive!
2186
01:28:24,250 --> 01:28:25,083
- Yes, you can!
2187
01:28:25,083 --> 01:28:25,917
- I haven't any-
2188
01:28:25,917 --> 01:28:26,917
- Shut up and drive!
2189
01:28:26,918 --> 01:28:28,207
(engine sputtering)
2190
01:28:28,208 --> 01:28:29,042
Oh!
2191
01:28:29,042 --> 01:28:30,042
Yah!
2192
01:28:31,792 --> 01:28:35,458
(speaking foreign language)
2193
01:28:39,375 --> 01:28:41,625
(shouting)
2194
01:28:43,250 --> 01:28:46,917
(speaking foreign language)
127027
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.