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1
00:00:05,701 --> 00:00:07,920
[knocking on door]
2
00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:11,359
Oh, hey, Dave!
3
00:00:11,402 --> 00:00:13,143
Come on in, buddy.
4
00:00:14,666 --> 00:00:16,059
Wow, you're in
a really good mood.
5
00:00:16,103 --> 00:00:19,671
I know. A new pothole
opened up on Jefferson,
6
00:00:19,715 --> 00:00:21,325
and it is tearing up
people's cars.
7
00:00:21,369 --> 00:00:24,154
They're breaking down
right in front of my shop.
8
00:00:24,198 --> 00:00:25,155
[chuckles]
9
00:00:25,199 --> 00:00:26,852
Ain't God good?
10
00:00:28,071 --> 00:00:29,855
Okay, well, since
you're so happy,
11
00:00:29,899 --> 00:00:32,119
you won't mind if I
borrow a couple tools.
12
00:00:32,162 --> 00:00:33,207
Sure, what do you need?
13
00:00:33,250 --> 00:00:34,947
Okay, let's see.
14
00:00:35,731 --> 00:00:37,080
Here we go.
15
00:00:37,124 --> 00:00:39,604
Uh, all right.
Miter saw, belt sander,
16
00:00:39,648 --> 00:00:41,084
power drill,
carriage bolts,
17
00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:42,999
auger bits,
and the instruction manuals
18
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,175
on how to use all those things.
19
00:00:47,612 --> 00:00:49,919
Dave, I've told you a hundred
times, we are not building
20
00:00:49,962 --> 00:00:52,052
a bridge connecting our houses.
21
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:57,231
It was not a bridge,
it was a catwalk.
22
00:00:59,624 --> 00:01:01,757
But this is about
something else. Okay.
23
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:04,064
Grover has been begging me
for a tree house,
24
00:01:04,107 --> 00:01:06,109
and since he's visiting
his grandmother for a few days,
25
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:09,547
I thought I'd surprise him
with one when he gets home.
26
00:01:09,591 --> 00:01:11,114
A tree house, huh?
27
00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:13,508
I remember the one
I built for Malcolm and Marty.
28
00:01:13,551 --> 00:01:15,292
That thing was amazing.
29
00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:17,990
Well, I've got some pretty
exciting plans myself.
30
00:01:18,034 --> 00:01:21,255
Two words: bird feeder.
31
00:01:23,605 --> 00:01:26,869
I got two words for you:
poor Grover.
32
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,089
Aw, man.
33
00:01:29,132 --> 00:01:31,569
You should've seen
the one I built.
34
00:01:31,613 --> 00:01:33,354
It had a lookout perch,
35
00:01:33,397 --> 00:01:34,833
a rope swing.
36
00:01:34,877 --> 00:01:38,185
It even had a secret door
that led to a slide.
37
00:01:38,228 --> 00:01:41,231
I can't believe I'm saying this,
but screw feeding the birds.
38
00:01:41,275 --> 00:01:44,104
Yeah, man, the boys spent
the entire summer up there.
39
00:01:44,147 --> 00:01:45,496
By the time they came down,
40
00:01:45,540 --> 00:01:49,370
Marty needed longer pants
and Malcolm had a goatee.
41
00:01:50,284 --> 00:01:52,460
Well, Calvin,
that sounds awesome. Hey--
42
00:01:52,503 --> 00:01:53,983
is there any chance
that you would help me
43
00:01:54,026 --> 00:01:55,506
build Grover's tree house?
44
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:57,073
Hmm.
45
00:01:57,117 --> 00:02:01,991
This may be the pothole
talking, but I'd love to.
46
00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:03,732
You know what, I got
some extra wood in my garage,
47
00:02:03,775 --> 00:02:04,950
and anything else we need,
48
00:02:04,994 --> 00:02:06,517
we can get
at the hardware store.
49
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,041
Okay, perfect. Also, we can
swing by the pet store.
50
00:02:09,085 --> 00:02:11,827
I have 200 pounds
of birdseed to return.
51
00:02:13,785 --> 00:02:15,918
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
52
00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:17,137
♪ Welcome to the hood.
53
00:02:21,663 --> 00:02:23,795
Wow, you really know your
way around Home Warehouse.
54
00:02:23,839 --> 00:02:25,275
You found everything
so quickly.
55
00:02:25,319 --> 00:02:26,798
Everything except you.
56
00:02:26,842 --> 00:02:29,671
Where the hell did you
disappear to for so long?
57
00:02:29,714 --> 00:02:31,325
Sorry. Any time I see
a plant section,
58
00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:34,284
I like to pretend
that I'm lost in the jungle.
59
00:02:35,894 --> 00:02:38,070
Hey, guys. Oh, nice.
60
00:02:38,114 --> 00:02:39,463
Dave, I see
you finally talked my dad
61
00:02:39,507 --> 00:02:41,291
into building that catwalk.
62
00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:43,163
Wrong.
63
00:02:43,206 --> 00:02:46,166
I'm helping Dave
build a tree house for Grover,
64
00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:48,516
just like the one I built
for you and Malcolm.
65
00:02:48,559 --> 00:02:50,126
Oh, really? That's fantastic.
66
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,389
Yeah, you know, just thinking
about it brings back
67
00:02:52,433 --> 00:02:56,001
a lot of happy memories
of you boys playing in yours.
68
00:02:56,045 --> 00:02:57,916
Yeah, me too, Dad.
[chuckles]
69
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:01,703
Man, see, that is exactly
the kind of memories
70
00:03:01,746 --> 00:03:03,226
that I want to have with Grover.
71
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,054
Aw, man, well, you won't
if you let my dad build it,
72
00:03:05,097 --> 00:03:07,012
because Grover will be dead.
73
00:03:09,537 --> 00:03:11,016
W-What are you talking about?
74
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:12,192
Trust me, man,
the one that my dad
75
00:03:12,235 --> 00:03:13,584
built for us was a nightmare.
76
00:03:13,628 --> 00:03:15,020
It had a hole in the floor,
77
00:03:15,064 --> 00:03:16,979
splinters everywhere,
nails poking out.
78
00:03:17,022 --> 00:03:19,329
It was like playing inside
a knife drawer.
79
00:03:19,373 --> 00:03:20,896
[stammers]
80
00:03:20,939 --> 00:03:22,506
I mean, what am I
supposed to do?
81
00:03:22,550 --> 00:03:25,292
I mean, your dad is so excited,
I can't ask him to stop now.
82
00:03:25,335 --> 00:03:27,381
Well, in that case,
the only thing you should do
83
00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:31,167
is use this saw
to cut down your tree.
84
00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:33,865
No, wait. You know what? No.
Marty, you're an engineer.
85
00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:37,391
Look, you can help us build it
and make sure that it's safe.
86
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:40,263
Dude, are you kidding me?
If my dad finds out you asked me
87
00:03:40,307 --> 00:03:42,222
to supervise his work,
he'll be furious.
88
00:03:42,265 --> 00:03:43,701
Well, then,
he doesn't need to know.
89
00:03:43,745 --> 00:03:46,400
Just swing by and make
a few casual suggestions.
90
00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:48,489
Then you're not stepping
on his toes.
91
00:03:48,532 --> 00:03:51,666
And more importantly,
Grover won't lose any of his.
92
00:03:51,709 --> 00:03:53,755
I don't know, man.
93
00:03:53,798 --> 00:03:55,278
Good news, Dave!
94
00:03:55,322 --> 00:03:57,541
I figured out a way
we can run a zip line
95
00:03:57,585 --> 00:04:00,065
from the roof to the tree house.
96
00:04:00,109 --> 00:04:02,416
We just got to get around
those power lines.
97
00:04:07,464 --> 00:04:08,813
So, 1:00 okay for you?
98
00:04:11,163 --> 00:04:13,209
Yes...
99
00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:18,170
Hey, Tina. Here's the
flour you asked for.
100
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:19,781
I brought all I had
because I didn't know
101
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:22,958
how many cups
were in a "crapload."
102
00:04:23,001 --> 00:04:24,916
Great. Did you also
bring the butter?
103
00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:26,570
No, sorry, I was out.
104
00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:29,965
Alexa, add a crapload of butter
to my shopping list.
105
00:04:30,008 --> 00:04:31,923
ALEXA:
I've added a crapload of butter
106
00:04:31,967 --> 00:04:33,969
to your shopping list.
107
00:04:35,057 --> 00:04:37,015
Did you program her to say that?
108
00:04:37,059 --> 00:04:39,453
No. She just gets me.
109
00:04:41,585 --> 00:04:43,500
So, what's with all the cookies?
110
00:04:43,544 --> 00:04:46,155
[sighs] Well,
like an idiot, I volunteered
111
00:04:46,198 --> 00:04:48,940
to make 400 of them
for the church bake sale.
112
00:04:48,984 --> 00:04:51,203
400? That's crazy.Mm.
113
00:04:51,247 --> 00:04:53,989
I know, but Sister Thompson
made 300 last year,
114
00:04:54,032 --> 00:04:56,296
and I thought embarrassing
that stuck-up old hag
115
00:04:56,339 --> 00:04:58,385
would be
the Christian thing to do.
116
00:04:58,428 --> 00:04:59,995
[laughs]
117
00:05:00,038 --> 00:05:01,475
Well, if you need some help,
118
00:05:01,518 --> 00:05:03,607
I'd be happy
to make some for you.
119
00:05:03,651 --> 00:05:05,522
Oh, really?
Sure.
120
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:07,002
I love to bake.
121
00:05:07,045 --> 00:05:08,482
You know, when Grover
was little, I used to...
122
00:05:08,525 --> 00:05:10,353
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Less chatter, more batter.
123
00:05:10,397 --> 00:05:12,007
Okay.
124
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:16,751
[chuckles]
125
00:05:16,794 --> 00:05:20,363
What do you say, Dave?
You looking level on your side?
126
00:05:20,407 --> 00:05:22,322
Not really.
127
00:05:22,365 --> 00:05:25,325
Ah, don't beat yourself up.
Mine isn't, either.
128
00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:26,456
[chuckles]
129
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:28,066
Hey, guys.
130
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:29,981
Oh, look who's here.
131
00:05:30,025 --> 00:05:32,375
It's Marty, showing up
completely on his own.
132
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:35,813
Right on time,
but totally unplanned.
133
00:05:35,857 --> 00:05:38,468
Yeah, I just figured I'd drop by
and see how you guys were doing.
134
00:05:38,512 --> 00:05:41,819
Oh, great. We're halfway done
with the floor.
135
00:05:41,863 --> 00:05:44,082
Yeah, uh, that's right, uh...
136
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:46,650
I got to levelwith you,
Marty, I can
137
00:05:46,694 --> 00:05:51,525
not evenbelieve
how well it's going.
138
00:05:51,568 --> 00:05:53,657
Well, actually,
from where I'm standing,
139
00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:55,659
i-it looks a little slanted.
140
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:59,010
Oh.
Eh, maybe.
141
00:05:59,054 --> 00:06:00,272
But trust me,
it'll look straight
142
00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:02,144
when it's 12 feet in the air.
143
00:06:02,187 --> 00:06:04,233
So-so, when you
get it up there,
144
00:06:04,276 --> 00:06:06,017
what are you gonna use
to support it? Is--
145
00:06:06,061 --> 00:06:08,193
You gonna use braces
or a cantilever system?
146
00:06:08,237 --> 00:06:10,544
Oh, a cantilever system.
You know what's crazy?
147
00:06:10,587 --> 00:06:14,025
Grover was just
asking for one of those.
148
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:15,592
No, man, don't worry
about that stuff.
149
00:06:15,636 --> 00:06:17,855
I got something
way sturdier in mind.
150
00:06:17,899 --> 00:06:19,596
Oh. W-What?
151
00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:21,381
I'm gonna nail it to that branch
152
00:06:21,424 --> 00:06:23,295
and then I'm-a tie a
bungee cord and run it
153
00:06:23,339 --> 00:06:26,473
all the way over to
that telephone pole.
154
00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:30,520
Yeah, I got to say, Dad,
from an engineering standpoint,
155
00:06:30,564 --> 00:06:32,696
that doesn't sound
super safe to me.
156
00:06:32,740 --> 00:06:34,524
You're probably right.
157
00:06:34,568 --> 00:06:36,221
Two bungee cords it is.
158
00:06:36,265 --> 00:06:38,528
Yeah, uh, I don't know, Calvin.
159
00:06:38,572 --> 00:06:41,531
I-I think Marty is making
some pretty good points.
160
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:43,098
Yeah, speaking of points,
161
00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:46,231
maybe we should hammer down
some of these exposed nails.
162
00:06:46,275 --> 00:06:48,059
What are you
talking about?
163
00:06:48,103 --> 00:06:49,887
That's a built-in
security system
164
00:06:49,931 --> 00:06:52,063
to keep the squirrels out.
165
00:06:52,847 --> 00:06:54,326
I don't know, Calvin, uh,
166
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:57,112
I think I'm leaning
towards Marty's suggestion.
167
00:06:57,155 --> 00:06:59,462
It feels a little bit
less tetanusy.
168
00:06:59,506 --> 00:07:02,596
All right, fine,
we'll hammer in the nails.
169
00:07:02,639 --> 00:07:04,641
Good. Y-You know,
170
00:07:04,685 --> 00:07:06,469
the squirrels probably
won't even be a problem.
171
00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:08,906
I know. 'Cause I'm-a
put barbed wire
172
00:07:08,950 --> 00:07:11,474
all around this
thing instead.
173
00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:13,215
Good idea, fellas.
174
00:07:16,131 --> 00:07:20,962
Alexa, set cookie timer
for 12 minutes.
175
00:07:21,005 --> 00:07:23,791
ALEXA:
Cookie timer set for 12 minutes.
176
00:07:23,834 --> 00:07:26,097
Girl, you are such a big help.
177
00:07:26,141 --> 00:07:30,275
Now, if you could talk trash
and drink wine, we could hang.
178
00:07:30,319 --> 00:07:32,800
Okay, here you go.
179
00:07:32,843 --> 00:07:35,063
100 vegan carob chip cookies.
180
00:07:35,106 --> 00:07:36,891
What?
[laughs]
I'm kidding.
181
00:07:36,934 --> 00:07:38,762
These are so unhealthy,
182
00:07:38,806 --> 00:07:42,287
there's a little heart
attack in each one.
183
00:07:42,331 --> 00:07:46,335
Hey, Mom, did you hear
the bad news about Mr. Pickett?
184
00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:48,468
Oh, he fell down
the stairs and-- Oh!
185
00:07:48,511 --> 00:07:50,208
Cookies.
186
00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:53,342
Mmm.
187
00:07:53,385 --> 00:07:54,778
Oh, my God.
[laughs]
188
00:07:54,822 --> 00:07:57,738
Mom, these are the best cookies
you ever made.
189
00:07:58,826 --> 00:08:00,218
Excuse me?
190
00:08:00,262 --> 00:08:02,220
I'm serious, Ma.
191
00:08:02,264 --> 00:08:03,657
I don't know
what you did different,
192
00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:06,137
but these right here
put all your other cookies
193
00:08:06,181 --> 00:08:07,269
to shame.
194
00:08:07,312 --> 00:08:09,097
[laughs] Mmm.
195
00:08:09,140 --> 00:08:11,969
Actually, I baked that batch.
196
00:08:12,013 --> 00:08:14,232
[clears throat]
You say what now?
197
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:20,674
Those are hers.
198
00:08:23,024 --> 00:08:25,417
You know what?
[coughs]
199
00:08:25,461 --> 00:08:27,202
I spoke way too soon.
200
00:08:27,245 --> 00:08:28,986
Let me go ahead
and try one of yours.
201
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:33,164
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
202
00:08:33,208 --> 00:08:35,340
You see? I was wrong.
203
00:08:35,384 --> 00:08:37,647
I was wrong.
These are way better.
204
00:08:37,691 --> 00:08:39,736
[laughs]
205
00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:41,521
Still Gemma's.
206
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:46,613
You know what?
207
00:08:46,656 --> 00:08:49,441
Let me try one of these right...Just get out of here!
208
00:08:51,879 --> 00:08:53,010
[thudding]
209
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:55,186
[laughs]
Look at that floor.
210
00:08:55,230 --> 00:08:56,840
Solid as a rock.
211
00:08:56,884 --> 00:08:59,495
I told you that dead branch
was strong enough to hold it.
212
00:09:00,496 --> 00:09:01,889
Yeah, uh,
213
00:09:01,932 --> 00:09:03,238
lucky for us you spotted it
214
00:09:03,281 --> 00:09:06,850
so very, very high
up in the tree.
215
00:09:06,894 --> 00:09:09,679
Oh, know what we should do,
216
00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:12,073
is get a steel pipe
and put it on the roof
217
00:09:12,116 --> 00:09:14,249
so Grover can fly a pirate flag.
218
00:09:14,292 --> 00:09:16,468
Oh, that's a great idea.
219
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:18,035
No kid's wooden fort
is complete
220
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:20,560
without a lightning rod
attached to it.
221
00:09:20,603 --> 00:09:23,867
Now, you see a problem,
I see free electricity.
222
00:09:23,911 --> 00:09:25,390
Yeah...
223
00:09:25,434 --> 00:09:27,958
You know, though, maybe
we skip the flagpole.
224
00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,700
Yeah, Grover's not into
pirates anymore anyway.
225
00:09:30,744 --> 00:09:32,093
Oh, that's too bad.
226
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:33,834
I see at least
three planks up there
227
00:09:33,877 --> 00:09:35,792
just begging
to be walked off.
228
00:09:37,968 --> 00:09:39,361
What's your deal, Marty?
229
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:41,493
Why you keep criticizing
everything I do?
230
00:09:41,537 --> 00:09:43,887
Well, i-it's not about you, Dad.
I'm just looking out for Grover.
231
00:09:43,931 --> 00:09:46,586
You know what?
I-I like the sound of that.
232
00:09:46,629 --> 00:09:48,500
You know, Grover
has very delicate bones.
233
00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:52,156
He's... he's basically
like a little baby bird.
234
00:09:53,288 --> 00:09:55,812
Eh, the only baby
around here is Marty.
235
00:09:55,856 --> 00:09:58,467
"Wah, the floor is uneven."
236
00:09:58,510 --> 00:10:01,557
"Wah, lightning's bad for you."
237
00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:04,429
I'm just trying to make it safe.
238
00:10:04,473 --> 00:10:07,607
No, what you're doing
is trying to make it boring.
239
00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:10,044
Half the fun of a tree house
is taking some risk.
240
00:10:10,087 --> 00:10:12,089
A little sense of adventure.
241
00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:14,265
When did you become so soft?
242
00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:16,659
I'm not soft, Dad.
243
00:10:16,703 --> 00:10:18,487
I'm just trying to stop
this tree house from being
244
00:10:18,530 --> 00:10:20,663
an even bigger disaster
than the one you built us.
245
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:23,057
What are you talking about?
You loved that tree house.
246
00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:25,929
No, man, I hated it. That thing
was way too dangerous.
247
00:10:25,973 --> 00:10:29,193
Name one thing that was
dangerous about it.
248
00:10:29,237 --> 00:10:32,632
Dad, you built it
over a barbecue pit.
249
00:10:35,199 --> 00:10:37,158
It's called heated floors.
250
00:10:38,376 --> 00:10:40,465
G-Guys, please stop arguing.
251
00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:42,424
Look, I'm not arguing,
I'm just realizing
252
00:10:42,467 --> 00:10:44,469
how ungrateful my son is.
253
00:10:44,513 --> 00:10:46,297
Yeah, and I'm just realizing
how reckless
254
00:10:46,341 --> 00:10:48,082
and irresponsible my dad is.
255
00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:50,301
You know what, Marty, what-what
are you even doing here?
256
00:10:50,345 --> 00:10:52,042
Nobody invited you.
Right, Dave?
257
00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:56,264
Yeah, totally uninvited, but at
the same time, very welcome.
258
00:10:58,005 --> 00:11:01,704
Yeah, fine, you guys don't want
my help, I'm out of here.
259
00:11:01,748 --> 00:11:03,837
I was just trying to keep
Grover safe.
260
00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,230
Well, you don't have
to worry about that,
261
00:11:06,274 --> 00:11:07,754
because when it comes
to tree houses,
262
00:11:07,797 --> 00:11:09,712
nobody builds 'em
better than me.
263
00:11:09,756 --> 00:11:12,584
Oh!
264
00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:15,500
Boom. There's your
rope swing right there.
265
00:11:22,290 --> 00:11:24,553
[knock on door]
266
00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:30,602
Hey, Dave, what's up?
267
00:11:30,646 --> 00:11:32,604
And if you say the tree house,
I will be shocked.
268
00:11:33,823 --> 00:11:36,652
I came over to apologize
for yesterday.
269
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:38,262
The last thing I wanted
was to cause
270
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:40,221
a fight
between you and your dad.
271
00:11:40,264 --> 00:11:41,570
I mean, you didn't
start that fight.
272
00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,572
He did when he called me soft.
273
00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:46,053
It's messed up.Yeah, I totally get it.
274
00:11:46,096 --> 00:11:49,752
I'd hate it if Calvin
ever thought I were soft.
275
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,845
But come on, Marty,
I need you to come back.
276
00:11:55,889 --> 00:11:57,151
For Grover's sake.
277
00:11:57,194 --> 00:11:58,456
How bad is it?
278
00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:01,285
It is a nightmare.
He's over there right now
279
00:12:01,329 --> 00:12:02,634
trying to get a diving board
280
00:12:02,678 --> 00:12:04,636
to reach the neighbors'
swimming pool.
281
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:08,728
Dave, I tried to help, man.
You saw what happened.
282
00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:12,340
I know, and I should have
backed you up, but...
283
00:12:12,383 --> 00:12:13,733
but it's hard.
284
00:12:13,776 --> 00:12:15,299
Your dad's heart is
in the right place,
285
00:12:15,343 --> 00:12:18,868
even though I'm pretty sure
his support beams are not.
286
00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:22,002
Well,
287
00:12:22,045 --> 00:12:23,394
if you want me to come back,
288
00:12:23,438 --> 00:12:25,527
you're gonna have to make my dad
do things my way.
289
00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:27,137
Absolutely. Look, Marty,
290
00:12:27,181 --> 00:12:29,749
from now on, you are in charge,
no matter what.
291
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:31,838
Okay, good. But we better get
over there quick
292
00:12:31,881 --> 00:12:33,796
because the neighbors drained
that pool two years ago.
293
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:35,798
Oh...
294
00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:42,587
Hey. Okay for me to come in?
295
00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:44,067
Of course, Gemma,
why wouldn't it be?
296
00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:46,635
I don't know,
I was worried you might still be
297
00:12:46,678 --> 00:12:49,464
upset about that whole cookie
thing yesterday.
298
00:12:49,507 --> 00:12:52,336
Ah, please, they're just
silly cookies
299
00:12:52,380 --> 00:12:54,774
that I've baked for Malcolm
his whole life,
300
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:59,039
ever since I squeezed his sorry
ass out of my damn body.
301
00:12:59,082 --> 00:13:00,605
I know, I'm sorry.
302
00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:02,782
No, no, it's not your fault.
303
00:13:02,825 --> 00:13:05,132
Malcolm was right,
your cookies were delicious.
304
00:13:05,175 --> 00:13:06,394
Thanks.
305
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:08,613
You're welcome. And besides,
306
00:13:08,657 --> 00:13:10,790
obviously it was just a fluke.
307
00:13:13,183 --> 00:13:14,794
What do you mean, a fluke?
308
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:17,405
Oh, I'm sorry, Gemma,
I didn't mean it like that.
309
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:18,841
I'm just saying,
everyone knows that
310
00:13:18,885 --> 00:13:21,322
my cookies eat yours
for breakfast.
311
00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:25,369
Well, everyone might know,
312
00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:27,850
but clearly Malcolm doesn't.
313
00:13:30,505 --> 00:13:34,074
Okay, okay.
314
00:13:34,117 --> 00:13:37,251
Well, it sounds like there's
only one way to settle this.
315
00:13:37,294 --> 00:13:38,513
You talking bake-off?
316
00:13:38,556 --> 00:13:41,472
Oh, you know it.
Name your cookie.
317
00:13:41,516 --> 00:13:45,085
Shortbread?
Snickerdoodle?
318
00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:49,437
If we're gonna do it,
let's go all the way.
319
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,221
You talking oatmeal?
320
00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:55,660
With raisins.
321
00:13:55,704 --> 00:13:59,664
Is there any other way?
322
00:13:59,708 --> 00:14:02,189
Actually, sometimes they
use chocolate chips.
323
00:14:02,232 --> 00:14:04,539
Oh, that sounds yummy.
Let's do that instead.
Okay.
324
00:14:09,979 --> 00:14:11,459
Hey, Dad.
325
00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:15,985
Oh, look who's back,
the building inspector.
326
00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:18,988
Actually, Calvin,
I asked Marty to come back.
327
00:14:19,032 --> 00:14:20,381
Why would you do that?
328
00:14:20,424 --> 00:14:22,644
Look, I know you're just
trying to make this place
329
00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:25,865
as much fun as possible
for Grover, but...
330
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:29,433
it would be nice if he were
actually alive to enjoy it.
331
00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:32,915
Seriously?
You're taking his side?
332
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:34,917
Look, Calvin,
there are no sides.
333
00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:36,571
Yeah, like this place
when somebody sneezes
334
00:14:36,614 --> 00:14:38,051
and the walls fall down.
335
00:14:39,052 --> 00:14:40,401
Know what? Fine.
336
00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,011
If neither of you think
that I can do this,
337
00:14:42,055 --> 00:14:42,969
then I'm out of here.
338
00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:47,016
But I'm taking my nail with me.
339
00:14:47,060 --> 00:14:50,019
[loud creaking]
340
00:14:50,063 --> 00:14:51,368
What was that?
341
00:14:51,412 --> 00:14:53,544
Oh, relax.
It's just the floor
342
00:14:53,588 --> 00:14:54,894
settling onto the tree.
343
00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:57,026
Now it's even more rock-solid.
344
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:59,550
[loud cracking]
345
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:05,034
M-Maybe I should put this nail
back where it, where it was.
346
00:15:05,078 --> 00:15:07,080
[all shout]
347
00:15:10,083 --> 00:15:11,040
Okay.
348
00:15:11,084 --> 00:15:12,041
I got to admit,
349
00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:13,869
now the floor is
a little slanted.
350
00:15:17,264 --> 00:15:19,440
[knocking]
351
00:15:19,483 --> 00:15:21,921
Whoa. [clears throat]
352
00:15:23,052 --> 00:15:25,011
Hey, ladies...Enough small talk.
353
00:15:25,054 --> 00:15:27,100
We need you to settle a bet.Mm-hmm.
354
00:15:27,143 --> 00:15:29,406
Uh, what bet?
355
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,408
We both baked
one of these cookies.
356
00:15:31,452 --> 00:15:32,757
All you have to do
is taste them
357
00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:34,629
and tell us which one
you like better.
358
00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:37,153
And God help you
if you get it wrong.
359
00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:39,764
You know, actually,
I am kind of busy right now.
360
00:15:39,808 --> 00:15:41,941
But you know who loves cookies?
361
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,420
Marty. I'm gonna go find him.
362
00:15:43,464 --> 00:15:45,596
Nice try, Malcolm.
Yeah.
363
00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:48,121
Now be a man and eat
your milk and cookies!
364
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:52,952
All right, fine.
365
00:15:57,217 --> 00:15:58,914
Mmm.
366
00:16:05,312 --> 00:16:06,487
So, which is better?
367
00:16:06,530 --> 00:16:07,967
Well...
368
00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:10,926
I hate to disappoint
either of you, but...
369
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:13,450
it's a tie-- everybody wins!
370
00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:15,322
Malcolm!
371
00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:17,150
All right, Ma.
372
00:16:17,193 --> 00:16:19,021
If I had to choose,
373
00:16:19,065 --> 00:16:21,632
I pick this one.
374
00:16:22,155 --> 00:16:24,200
Boom! Hey!
375
00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:28,161
Somebody call Keebler and tell
'em there's a new elf in town!
376
00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:35,168
Well, congratulations.
377
00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:38,214
I guess you were right,
my cookies were just a fluke.
378
00:16:38,258 --> 00:16:40,956
I'm sorry, Gemma,
I never should've said that.
379
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,654
I just overreacted
because I'm Malcolm's mom.
380
00:16:43,698 --> 00:16:45,569
And, you know, every mama wants
381
00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:47,789
her baby to like
her cookies best.
382
00:16:47,832 --> 00:16:51,401
I get it, and I'm glad
he picked yours.
383
00:16:51,445 --> 00:16:52,881
Thank you.
384
00:16:52,924 --> 00:16:54,404
And thank you, Malcolm.
385
00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,972
Now I'm gonna go put
your baby pictures back up.
386
00:16:59,844 --> 00:17:03,326
Look, I'm sorry, Gemma.
Your cookie was good, too.
387
00:17:03,370 --> 00:17:06,155
It just had a bit of, um,
a strange aftertaste.
388
00:17:06,199 --> 00:17:09,593
I hope so. I put in
a crapload of pickle juice.
389
00:17:10,464 --> 00:17:12,683
Pickle juice?
Why would you put pickle juice
390
00:17:12,727 --> 00:17:14,163
in an oatmeal cookie?
391
00:17:14,207 --> 00:17:16,035
Because I'm a mama, too.
392
00:17:16,078 --> 00:17:18,341
Like your mom said,
we all want our babies
393
00:17:18,385 --> 00:17:20,387
to like our cookies best.
394
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:21,518
[chuckles]
395
00:17:21,562 --> 00:17:23,216
You're a good friend, Gemma.
396
00:17:23,259 --> 00:17:26,132
Not that good. At first, I was
going to put it in her cookie.
397
00:17:28,221 --> 00:17:30,266
[tree house creaking]
398
00:17:31,093 --> 00:17:34,183
Okay, nobody move or this thing
is gonna collapse.
399
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,880
All right, now I know
how this looks, but I built
400
00:17:35,924 --> 00:17:37,404
this thing for a couple
of little kids.
401
00:17:37,447 --> 00:17:39,101
Not three grown men.
402
00:17:39,928 --> 00:17:41,538
That being said,
I probably could've used
403
00:17:41,582 --> 00:17:43,018
a few more bungee cords.
404
00:17:43,845 --> 00:17:46,369
Okay, so what
do we do now?
405
00:17:46,413 --> 00:17:49,198
And if you're gonna say
pee your pants, well...
406
00:17:49,242 --> 00:17:50,373
mission accomplished.
407
00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:52,332
Well, Marty,
you're an engineer.
408
00:17:52,375 --> 00:17:54,943
If anybody can figure a way
to get us out of here, it's you.
409
00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:58,120
Okay, okay, okay, uh...
all right, I-I think I got it.
410
00:17:58,164 --> 00:18:00,949
Um, if-if we coordinate
our movements
411
00:18:00,992 --> 00:18:03,256
and redistribute
our body weight, that should
412
00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:05,736
counterbalance the floor
until we can each get out.
413
00:18:05,780 --> 00:18:08,174
Great idea.
And may I say,
414
00:18:08,217 --> 00:18:10,132
as a professional
conflict mediator,
415
00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:12,917
an excellent team-building
exercise.
416
00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:16,051
You know...
Okay, all right.
417
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,313
You might want to hurry
this thing up.
418
00:18:17,357 --> 00:18:18,706
This tree is getting sick
of Dave, too.
419
00:18:18,749 --> 00:18:20,882
Okay... okay, Dave?
420
00:18:20,925 --> 00:18:23,363
You're closest to the door.
I'm gonna slide two steps
421
00:18:23,406 --> 00:18:25,582
to the left, Dad, you take
two steps to the right.
422
00:18:25,626 --> 00:18:27,497
That should balance the floor.
423
00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:29,064
Ready?
424
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,675
Go!
425
00:18:31,719 --> 00:18:33,808
All right.
426
00:18:33,851 --> 00:18:36,332
Okay, all right,
Dave, you climb out.
427
00:18:36,376 --> 00:18:39,030
Dad, as soon as he does,
you take another step
428
00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:41,207
to the left.
I'm gonna take two steps back.
429
00:18:41,250 --> 00:18:44,775
Oh, so this is like the Electric
Slide meets the Cupid Shuffle.
430
00:18:44,819 --> 00:18:46,777
No, Dad, Dad, no!
431
00:18:46,821 --> 00:18:48,388
Oh, my God.
[stammers]
432
00:18:48,431 --> 00:18:49,867
Oh, oh, ooh!
433
00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:52,653
That-That-That's on me
right there.
434
00:18:53,654 --> 00:18:55,395
Okay, Dave, go!
435
00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:56,787
Okay.
436
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:59,050
And for the record,
there are
437
00:18:59,094 --> 00:19:01,052
no two men that I'd rather be
trapped in a tree house
438
00:19:01,096 --> 00:19:03,316
with than the two of you!Get out of here!
439
00:19:08,538 --> 00:19:09,496
Okay, Dad.
440
00:19:09,539 --> 00:19:10,801
It's your turn.
441
00:19:10,845 --> 00:19:12,063
No, son, you go.
442
00:19:12,107 --> 00:19:13,761
All right, this is my fault.
443
00:19:13,804 --> 00:19:15,197
If I had listened
to your suggestions,
444
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:17,460
we wouldn't be here
in the first place.
445
00:19:17,504 --> 00:19:19,027
I just got carried away.
446
00:19:19,070 --> 00:19:22,291
It's okay, man. You were
just trying to make it fun.
447
00:19:22,335 --> 00:19:24,424
The same way you did
when you built ours.
448
00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:25,729
Thanks.
449
00:19:25,773 --> 00:19:27,775
And I shouldn't have
called you soft,
450
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:29,385
because you're not.
451
00:19:29,429 --> 00:19:31,213
You mean that?
452
00:19:31,257 --> 00:19:32,910
Yeah. I mean,
453
00:19:32,954 --> 00:19:34,695
the way you kept your cool
and figured out
454
00:19:34,738 --> 00:19:36,610
a way to get us out of here,
455
00:19:36,653 --> 00:19:38,264
there's nothing soft about that.
456
00:19:39,352 --> 00:19:40,570
Thanks, Dad.
457
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:42,790
Bring it in, son.
458
00:19:43,878 --> 00:19:45,445
All right, whoa,
whoa, whoa, okay.
459
00:19:45,488 --> 00:19:47,708
Bring it out, bring it out!
460
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,846
Okay, okay, Dad, I'm going.
461
00:19:55,890 --> 00:19:57,718
I'll see you
on the ground.
462
00:19:57,761 --> 00:19:59,937
One way or the other.
463
00:20:02,288 --> 00:20:04,290
[muttering]
464
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:09,599
Damn.
465
00:20:09,643 --> 00:20:12,341
Why did I let Dave go first?
466
00:20:19,696 --> 00:20:22,438
You were right, this is a much
better idea than the one I had.
467
00:20:22,482 --> 00:20:24,527
True. Although I would've
loved to see my dad try
468
00:20:24,571 --> 00:20:26,964
to Mary Poppins his way down
with your beach umbrella.
469
00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:29,315
Calvin, you okay up there?
470
00:20:29,358 --> 00:20:31,969
Yeah, but I'm running out
of time!
471
00:20:32,013 --> 00:20:33,754
When's that umbrella coming?
472
00:20:33,797 --> 00:20:35,408
Okay... change of plans.
473
00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:37,279
We've got some mattresses
for you to land on!
474
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,586
[tree house crackling, rumbling]
475
00:20:40,891 --> 00:20:42,458
Dad, you got to jump now!
476
00:20:42,502 --> 00:20:45,374
A squirrel just did
and I think he knows something.
477
00:20:47,898 --> 00:20:50,510
All right, here I come!
478
00:20:50,553 --> 00:20:54,253
Just remember,
you're the Black Bruce Willis.
479
00:20:55,515 --> 00:20:58,257
Yippee ki-yay, mother brother!
480
00:21:03,087 --> 00:21:08,005
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
481
00:21:08,049 --> 00:21:09,355
and TOYOTA.
482
00:21:12,619 --> 00:21:15,012
Captioned by
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