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1
00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:05,245
- They are not.
- They are too.
2
00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:08,205
Your hypothesis is completely disconfirmed
by all the data.
3
00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:11,205
You're just clinging to it
out of intellectual stubbornness.
4
00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:15,445
No, you're displaying a shocking ignorance
of the subject matter.
5
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,729
Mummies and zombies
are the exact same thing.
6
00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:21,447
Oh, yeah?
7
00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:23,364
Mummies are wrapped in bandages.
8
00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:26,040
That's called a fashion choice.
9
00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:30,131
All right. You brought this on yourself.
10
00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:33,164
- Sheldon, get him.
- If a zombie bites you...
11
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:35,251
you turn into a zombie.
12
00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:37,090
However, if a mummy bites you...
13
00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,886
all you turn into
is some schmo with a mummy bite.
14
00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:43,562
So, like a zombie that's been eaten
from the waist down...
15
00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,570
you, sir, have no leg to stand on.
16
00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:49,486
- Good boy. Here's a cookie.
- Oh, thank you.
17
00:00:49,640 --> 00:00:51,847
Hey, fellas, what's going on?
18
00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:53,644
Mummies and zombies again.
19
00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,571
Ahh. They're not the same thing.
20
00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:58,286
You get a cookie too.
21
00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:00,481
Thanks.
22
00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:03,610
Guess who picked up his new car
this morning.
23
00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,644
Congratulations.
Does it have that new-car smell?
24
00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:09,400
Yep. For as long
as I can keep my mother out of it.
25
00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:14,170
If you wanna check it out later,
it's parked right out front, Space 294.
26
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:17,682
- I'm sorry, 294?
- Yeah.
27
00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:19,888
That's my parking spot.
28
00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:24,648
Why do you have a parking spot?
You don't have a car. You don't drive.
29
00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:27,320
It doesn't matter. That's my spot.
30
00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:30,887
Maybe they reassigned it
because you never use it.
31
00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,641
I'm not using my nipples either.
Maybe they should reassign those.
32
00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:39,161
Sheldon, someday, if you get a car...
33
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,681
I'm sure they'll give you
another parking space.
34
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,929
I don't want another parking space.
I want my parking space.
35
00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:49,210
Well, it's perfect. It's a corner spot,
cutting the risk of door dings in half.
36
00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:51,602
It's a mere 28 steps
from the building entrance.
37
00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:55,162
The nearby tree provides shade
on hot days...
38
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,045
and is also home
to a delightful squirrel...
39
00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:02,285
which is fortuitous
because most squirrels are real jerks.
40
00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:08,123
Fun story.
Meanwhile, you still don't have a car.
41
00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:09,845
Don't try to change the subject.
42
00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:13,362
This is about a parking space.
It has nothing to do with cars.
43
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:15,565
Are you listening to yourself?
44
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,804
I always listen to myself.
It's one of the great joys of my life.
45
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:22,801
- Now get your car out of my spot.
- Nope.
46
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,083
Very well, you leave me no choice.
47
00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:34,721
What are you looking at,
you stupid squirrel?
48
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:06,084
President Seibert, listen to reason.
49
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:09,250
Yeah, I understand
I don't use the parking spot.
50
00:03:09,440 --> 00:03:11,681
That's not the point. I...
51
00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:15,606
Yes, I'm aware you told me
not to call you at home.
52
00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:17,565
But you didn't answer the door.
53
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:22,562
And I know you were there
because I saw you through the mail slot.
54
00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,647
Yeah, well, that's some salty language.
55
00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:28,804
May I remind you, you're the president
of a major university...
56
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,571
not the president
of the Potty Mouth Club.
57
00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:33,000
There it is again.
58
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,771
Do you kiss your mother
with that mouth?
59
00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,407
Oh. Well, I'm sorry for your loss.
60
00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:40,644
Good night, sir.
61
00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:42,484
Unbelievable.
62
00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,008
He says Wolowitz deserves my spot...
63
00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:47,720
because he's a high-profile asset
to the university.
64
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,606
Well, he's not wrong. Howard did go
to the International Space Station.
65
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:53,086
That was five weeks ago.
66
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:55,442
How much longer
is he gonna milk that cow?
67
00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:59,007
Sheldon, let it go. It's not a big deal.
68
00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:01,162
No. No, this is a slippery slope, Leonard.
69
00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:04,005
See, it starts with a parking space.
Where does it end?
70
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,687
It's like my dad always said,
"First they say you can't drink and drive."
71
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,400
Next you can't let your 10-year-old
take the wheel...
72
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,246
"...while you sleep one off
in the backseat."
73
00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:17,848
All that story does
is make me feel bad for your mother.
74
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,970
Leonard, you're my best friend.
Why don't you ever take my side?
75
00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:28,683
Because I can never understand
your side!
76
00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:33,005
Give it back.
77
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:35,771
I'm sorry,
but could you be more specific?
78
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,163
My Iron Man helmet.
Koothrappali saw you take it. Give it back.
79
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,203
Oh, that.
80
00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:46,048
Well, see, I wanted it
and you weren't using it.
81
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,290
Apparently,
those are the rules we live by now.
82
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:55,566
Payback, it truly is the B-word, isn't it?
83
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,482
Sheldon, that is a $500
limited-edition collectible...
84
00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:01,966
and I want it back.
85
00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:05,084
Well, I'd love to help you out,
but unfortunately...
86
00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:07,641
I'm using it.
87
00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:15,483
Fine. I'm taking your diploma.
88
00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:19,689
Go ahead.
That's the only doctorate you'll ever get.
89
00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,167
It smells funny in here.
90
00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:30,921
We're so proud of you, Amy.
Your first bikini wax.
91
00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:32,889
Yeah.
92
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:40,681
So how you doing?
93
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:42,928
Oh, a little sensitive, but not bad.
94
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,284
Does it always take that long?
95
00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:48,762
Uh, no, they don't usually have to go out
and get more wax.
96
00:05:50,280 --> 00:05:53,204
I feel like I'm 5 pounds lighter.
97
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:57,046
Really? Only 5?
98
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:00,600
Anybody want a drink?
99
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:02,285
- Sure.
- Okay.
100
00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:06,161
So did you spend last night hearing
about this silly parking-space fight too?
101
00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:09,091
For hours. Fortunately,
I couldn't understand most of it...
102
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,965
because Sheldon was wearing
that stupid robot mask.
103
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:16,043
Howard was so angry, I had
to mash up Benadryl in his ice cream...
104
00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:18,288
to get him to fall asleep.
105
00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:23,728
I guess this is what we get for being
with two testosterone-fueled alpha males.
106
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:26,962
At some point,
they're bound to lock horns.
107
00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:30,607
I'm assuming these are some kind
of horns they bought at Comic-Con?
108
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,440
I'm really sorry
they took Sheldon's spot away.
109
00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:38,644
He shouldn't have to suffer
just because Howard's a big deal now.
110
00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:42,566
I know. Sheldon should just let Howard
have his little moment in the sun.
111
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:44,605
What's that supposed to mean?
112
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,560
Well, I mean,
Howard's never gonna go to space again...
113
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:50,565
but Sheldon will always be a genius.
114
00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:55,846
You're right. And I'm sure Sheldon
will get a fancy parking spot again...
115
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,322
if and when he makes
a worthwhile contribution to science.
116
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:03,971
- If and when?
- Maybe we should change the subject.
117
00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:07,004
Amy, how are your lady parts?
Still chilly down there?
118
00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:13,763
Hang on. None of Sheldon's theories
have ever been definitively proven.
119
00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:16,531
My husband actually went
to outer space.
120
00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,370
That's an impressive accomplishment.
121
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,967
He's now an inspiration
to millions of Americans...
122
00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:25,324
who know you don't have to be special
or even qualified to go into space.
123
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,808
You know, I remember the first time
I got a bikini wax.
124
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:32,891
My sister did it with melted Crayolas
and duct tape.
125
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,970
Yeah, it's a bad idea.
126
00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,281
Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility.
127
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:44,969
Is it maybe because, like Sheldon's work,
your sex life is also theoretical?
128
00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,329
Damn.
129
00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:53,803
Well, at least when we do make love...
130
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:56,571
Sheldon won't be thinking
about his mother.
131
00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:02,243
That is a cleverly veiled reference
to Howard's lifelong obsession...
132
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,641
to crawl back into her spacious womb.
133
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:08,510
Anyway, to this day, I
still can't see a box
134
00:08:08,523 --> 00:08:10,644
of crayons without crossing my legs.
Ha, ha.
135
00:08:12,160 --> 00:08:13,650
I don't have to take this.
136
00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:16,770
I'm gonna go home
and have sex with my husband right now.
137
00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:20,163
Maybe I'll let him do it to me
in the parking spot.
138
00:08:21,720 --> 00:08:25,441
Which sounds dirty
but I didn't mean it that way.
139
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:30,089
Okay, here's another one.
140
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:33,728
If a zombie bites a vampire...
141
00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:35,604
and the vampire bites a human...
142
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:39,691
does the human become a vampire
or a zombie?
143
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,602
Or a zompire?
144
00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:46,364
Sheldon?
145
00:08:46,560 --> 00:08:48,369
Cookie?
146
00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:52,246
- I don't have any.
- Well, I'm not giving it away.
147
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:58,200
- Hi, Sheldon.
- Aah!
148
00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:03,200
He's in my spot.
149
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:06,131
Leonard, make him stop being naked
in my spot.
150
00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:09,202
Howard, what are you doing?
151
00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:11,644
He wasn't using it...
152
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:17,648
and I needed a nice cool piece of
leather to wiggle my naked ass on.
153
00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:20,327
Get off there.
154
00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:21,970
Give me back my Iron Man helmet.
155
00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:23,480
Give back my parking space.
156
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,166
You don't need a parking space.
You don't have a car.
157
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,449
You don't need an Iron Man helmet.
You're not Iron Man.
158
00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:33,322
Well, we appear
to have reached an impasse...
159
00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:36,484
and, you know, I have to say,
I thought you'd be more upset...
160
00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,809
that your laptop is sitting on my junk.
161
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,241
I didn't pick up on that.
That's a nice touch.
162
00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,201
This is so exciting. I'm
feeling all tingly.
163
00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,330
Although, that could just be
my newly defoliated bikini zone.
164
00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:04,521
Keep a lookout.
165
00:10:04,760 --> 00:10:07,366
This place is swarming
with campus security.
166
00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,046
They will not hesitate to scold us.
167
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:12,011
Freaking pigs.
168
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:19,048
Oh, yeah.
169
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:24,404
Okay, now pull your car into the spot
and let's get out of here.
170
00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:26,284
Wait, I'm leaving my car here?
171
00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,841
Yes. And be sure
and put on the emergency brake.
172
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:31,486
It really makes these things tough
to budge.
173
00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:34,160
Before I park, come in the backseat.
174
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:37,051
I wanna show you something
I had done today.
175
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:40,529
All right. Color me intrigued.
176
00:10:44,920 --> 00:10:46,331
What do you think?
177
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,251
I think you're high on paint fumes.
178
00:10:50,080 --> 00:10:52,924
And, boy, that's a lot of Band-Aids.
179
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:58,683
Okay, Howard's mother is in, like,
every one of your wedding photos.
180
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,920
What can I tell you? She's a big girl.
181
00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:07,970
Wherever you look, there she is.
182
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,000
More coffee?
183
00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:12,407
No, Leonard's taking me
to a physics lecture...
184
00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,251
and coffee will just keep me awake.
185
00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,210
Oh, I'll get it.
186
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:25,406
Oh, looks like someone's
on Team Bernadette.
187
00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:29,367
- Where's Howard?
- He's not here. What's wrong?
188
00:11:29,560 --> 00:11:32,769
He had my car towed.
It cost me $200 to get it back.
189
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,286
Oh, no.
190
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,568
Where was it parked?
191
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:40,245
In Sheldon's spot.
192
00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:43,410
Well, that doesn't make sense.
Sheldon doesn't have a spot.
193
00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:46,490
Was it maybe in Howard's spot?
194
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:51,527
Don't play dumb with me, sister.
You tell your husband he owes me $200.
195
00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:54,405
- Well, that doesn't make sense either.
- Why not?
196
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,285
Because I'm the one who had it towed.
197
00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:03,527
- You?
- Didn't see that one coming, did you?
198
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:06,766
Oh, yeah?
Well, you're not gonna see this coming.
199
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,643
- Aah!
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God, are you okay?
200
00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:14,486
- What the hell do you have in there?
- My wallet, keys...
201
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,849
and a coffee can full of change
I've been meaning to take to the bank.
202
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,440
- Don't move. I'll get some ice.
- Are you okay?
203
00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:25,804
Get away from me, or I swear to God,
I will rip out what's left of your pubes.
204
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,162
- Here.
- Oh, thanks. Aah.
205
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,561
Amy, you think maybe
this has gotten out of hand?
206
00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,649
Gee, you think?
207
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:36,803
I do. Penny, Bernadette and I are sorry.
208
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,651
- You hit her. What did I do?
- You had my car towed.
209
00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:42,764
- You were parked in Howard's spot.
- I was in Sheldon's spot.
210
00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:44,371
Sheldon doesn't have a spot.
211
00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:46,961
Guys, I think I need to go
to the emergency room.
212
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,168
- Okay, let's go.
- I'll drive. You can see...
213
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:53,365
- ...where the tow truck scratched my car.
- The tow truck didn't scratch your car.
214
00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:56,171
- How do you know?
- Because I did it.
215
00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:07,690
Morning, Professor Stevens.
216
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:11,487
Hey, don't look at that whiteboard.
That's my math, not your math.
217
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:12,846
Keep walking, nosy.
218
00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:17,046
What the hell are you doing?
219
00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:23,162
Oh. You said I'm not using my space,
so I'm using it.
220
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:27,890
Okay, you need to move now.
221
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,570
No, I don't.
222
00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:31,688
You can't stay there forever.
223
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:37,410
Actually, I have a plastic baggy
strapped to my leg that says I can.
224
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,326
Give up, Wolowitz.
225
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:44,081
You've chosen to tangle
with a superior intellect you can't defeat.
226
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:45,960
There is nothing
you could possibly do to...
227
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,164
Those aren't gonna help you, Sheldon.
228
00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:00,330
Oh, yes, they are. I mean, what?
229
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,000
I'm warning you, Sheldon.
230
00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:04,690
Your threats are empty.
231
00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,370
Nothing can move me.
232
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,648
- Stop that!
- Get out of my spot!
233
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:12,844
No. That's it.
I am calling campus security.
234
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,570
You prepare for the scolding of your life.
235
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:18,285
What are you idiots doing?
236
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,450
He's trying to kill me, Leonard.
237
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,843
Video games and rock music
have desensitized him to violence.
238
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:29,288
Would you please talk some sense
into your lunatic roommate?
239
00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:32,444
You're both acting like lunatics.
It's just a parking spot.
240
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:33,806
Not just a parking spot.
241
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,964
He can't handle the fact
that I'm a bigger deal than he is now.
242
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:40,369
Oh, preposterous.
I have been solely responsible...
243
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:43,604
for this university's
six-loop quantum gravity calculations.
244
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,804
I have changed the way we think
about Bose-Einstein condensates...
245
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,407
and I am also the one
who got Nutter Butters...
246
00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:51,284
in the cafeteria vending machine.
247
00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:57,169
Maybe you missed that news while you were
floating around like a goof in outer space.
248
00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:01,608
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have work to do.
249
00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:03,485
Can you believe this guy?
250
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:06,007
What I don't believe
is you tried to run him over.
251
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,322
Oh, like you've never thought
of doing that.
252
00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:13,122
Don't hate me
just because I lived the dream.
253
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:17,689
Hey, sweet ride.
254
00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:21,691
What are you doing in there?
255
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:24,923
Just breaking in your new car.
256
00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,169
Stop that! You stop that!
257
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,521
You know what they say.
258
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,520
Revenge is a dish best served nude.
259
00:15:39,680 --> 00:15:42,047
- Hey, got a minute?
- Oh, of course, come in.
260
00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:52,603
This is an authentic Chinese throwing star,
and I must warn you...
261
00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:55,525
I have seen many people throw them
in movies.
262
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:59,044
Calm down. Howard has something
he wants to say to you.
263
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:00,727
All right.
264
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:07,487
Sheldon, when this whole thing
with the parking space started...
265
00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:11,810
I had no idea
just how much of a crazy bastard...
266
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:15,288
Howard, that's not how we practiced it.
267
00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:19,649
I had no idea
how much that spot meant to you.
268
00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:22,411
Anyway, I called President Seibert...
269
00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:26,531
and told him
it's not worth fighting over the spot...
270
00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:28,404
so you keep it...
271
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,644
and I'll park in the structure
across the street.
272
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,923
Well, Howard, thank you.
273
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:39,091
That's quite a gesture on your part.
274
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,846
You've shown yourself
to be the bigger man.
275
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:45,089
- Thank you.
- Which I find totally unacceptable.
276
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,410
I must be the bigger man.
277
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:52,003
Therefore, you may use my spot...
278
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:56,967
until such time as I learn to drive
or get a Batmobile.
279
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:01,569
Wow, okay. Well, thanks.
280
00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:03,922
I don't know what to say.
281
00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:07,203
There is nothing to say.
Except I'm the bigger man.
282
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,689
I'm not kidding. Say it.
283
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:14,247
Just say it.
284
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,888
You're the bigger man, Sheldon.
285
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:18,730
Oh, stop.
286
00:17:19,840 --> 00:17:23,003
And I believe this is yours.
287
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:27,366
FYI, if you wear that into a bank,
they will tackle you to the ground.
288
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:34,291
I'd like to propose a toast.
289
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:36,403
To burying the hatchet.
290
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,804
To burying the hatchet.
291
00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:43,168
You know,
I'm kind of glad this happened.
292
00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:47,081
Me too. In a weird way,
I kind of feel like it brought us closer.
293
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,651
Yeah, everybody's happy. Great.
294
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:01,447
Can I help you?
295
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:05,401
Yes, according to information I gleaned
from Yelp...
296
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:09,804
you had great success
when a SantariaSuzy37...
297
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,083
brought you a pair of leather slacks
stained with chicken blood.
298
00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:17,370
You know, I believe
I may have a similar problem.
299
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:24,602
This cushion experienced
a nude revenge wiggle.
300
00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:27,610
A what?
301
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:30,003
A naked man sat on it.
302
00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:31,886
Now, here's my concern.
303
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:35,567
His diet is rich in fatty deli meats.
304
00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,969
What tests do you have
to detect lipid residue?
305
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,484
Lipid what?
306
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,963
Lipid residue.
307
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:47,810
An anal autograph.
308
00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:52,003
A colon calling card, if you will.
309
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,684
- Tuesday okay?
- Oh.
310
00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:02,209
Don't rush it. We may be dealing
with befoulment on a molecular level.
311
00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:04,968
Let me write you a ticket.
312
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:08,806
Is that your son?
313
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:10,769
Uh-huh.
314
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,924
Looks like that laptop's seen better days.
315
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,845
If you're interested, I'm selling this.
316
00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:18,451
It's only 2 years old...
317
00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,244
has 16 gigabytes of RAM...
318
00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:22,249
Intel Core i7 processor...
319
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,164
and I can personally guarantee...
320
00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:28,570
it has spent less than 20 minutes
resting on an astronaut's penis.
25808
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