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1
00:00:14,730 --> 00:00:19,730
Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
2
00:00:21,351 --> 00:00:22,782
Down it! Down it!
3
00:00:22,784 --> 00:00:24,015
Down it!
Down it!
4
00:00:24,017 --> 00:00:26,015
Down it! Down it!
Down it!
5
00:00:26,017 --> 00:00:27,615
Down it!
Down it!
6
00:00:27,617 --> 00:00:29,848
- Haven't you finished it yet?
- Come on, down it!
7
00:00:29,850 --> 00:00:31,015
Go on!
8
00:00:31,017 --> 00:00:33,049
Jesus Christ.
9
00:00:33,051 --> 00:00:34,084
Yeah!
10
00:00:39,051 --> 00:00:40,615
Oh, bloody hell.
11
00:00:40,617 --> 00:00:43,015
You stupid shit!
12
00:00:43,017 --> 00:00:44,617
Sorry. Sorry!
13
00:00:45,017 --> 00:00:46,548
Good start to the day.
14
00:00:46,550 --> 00:00:47,982
Mate, he's seventy
15
00:00:47,984 --> 00:00:48,848
with a puke covered
windscreen
16
00:00:48,850 --> 00:00:49,748
and he's still driving
faster than you.
17
00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:52,182
- I'm driving at the speed limit.
- Yeah.
18
00:00:52,184 --> 00:00:53,215
There you go.
19
00:00:53,217 --> 00:00:55,082
Oh, come on, it's not even
breakfast time yet.
20
00:00:55,084 --> 00:00:57,082
It's your stag.
It's the law.
21
00:00:57,084 --> 00:00:58,682
- Myles?
- Why, thank you.
22
00:00:58,684 --> 00:01:01,217
And, one for our
kind driver.
23
00:01:01,750 --> 00:01:03,017
Seriously?
24
00:01:04,750 --> 00:01:06,615
Er, what the fuck
is this shit?
25
00:01:06,617 --> 00:01:07,615
Huh?
26
00:01:07,617 --> 00:01:09,282
Sorry,
it's on shuffle.
27
00:01:09,284 --> 00:01:11,483
It's one of Billy's.
He loves this song.
28
00:01:11,984 --> 00:01:13,984
You should see him
bopping away whenever...
29
00:01:16,017 --> 00:01:18,017
Oh, sorry, do I bore you
talking about my son?
30
00:01:20,284 --> 00:01:21,615
Oh, well maybe
you bore me
31
00:01:21,617 --> 00:01:23,815
with talk about
your wedding.
32
00:01:23,817 --> 00:01:25,049
I didn't say anything.
33
00:01:25,051 --> 00:01:25,915
Maybe when you
all grow up
34
00:01:25,917 --> 00:01:27,615
you'll understand
that having a baby
35
00:01:27,617 --> 00:01:29,282
is one of the greatest gifts
a man can get.
36
00:01:29,284 --> 00:01:31,115
If he was such
a great gift,
37
00:01:31,117 --> 00:01:33,115
why the fuck did I have
to buy you a present
38
00:01:33,117 --> 00:01:33,882
when he was born?
39
00:01:33,884 --> 00:01:36,149
Cause that's just
what you do.
40
00:01:36,151 --> 00:01:38,049
Oh, what time did you
tell Cheese to get there?
41
00:01:38,051 --> 00:01:39,049
Er, seven-fifteen.
42
00:01:39,051 --> 00:01:39,949
- Cheese is coming?
- Yeah.
43
00:01:39,951 --> 00:01:41,982
Ah, nice.
I haven't seen him in years.
44
00:01:41,984 --> 00:01:42,848
Why did you tell him
to get there later?
45
00:01:42,850 --> 00:01:44,515
I don't want him
to spend too much time
46
00:01:44,517 --> 00:01:45,748
with Rachel's dad.
47
00:01:45,750 --> 00:01:46,581
Colonel Gerald.
48
00:01:46,583 --> 00:01:48,249
- Commander, I think.
- Like Bond.
49
00:01:48,251 --> 00:01:49,882
Yeah, except Bond's
military history
50
00:01:49,884 --> 00:01:51,548
is marginally less fictional.
51
00:01:51,550 --> 00:01:52,481
- What do you mean?
- I mean,
52
00:01:52,483 --> 00:01:54,049
I spoke to him at your
engagement party,
53
00:01:54,051 --> 00:01:55,949
and no way was that total
bell piece in the army.
54
00:01:55,951 --> 00:01:57,748
- Yes he was.
- Seen any pictures?
55
00:01:57,750 --> 00:01:59,648
Well, no, but he was in
a secret division.
56
00:01:59,650 --> 00:02:00,515
Bollocks.
57
00:02:00,517 --> 00:02:01,448
Well, there's one thing
I know for sure
58
00:02:01,450 --> 00:02:03,115
and that's that he doesn't
really like me,
59
00:02:03,117 --> 00:02:04,515
so it's probably best
he doesn't spend
60
00:02:04,517 --> 00:02:06,748
much of the weekend
with my alcoholic,
61
00:02:06,750 --> 00:02:09,249
drug dealing,
nutcase of a friend.
62
00:02:09,251 --> 00:02:10,249
Oh, come on,
63
00:02:10,251 --> 00:02:12,149
Cheese isn't going
to be like he was at uni.
64
00:02:12,151 --> 00:02:13,882
He's in his thirties
for crying out loud.
65
00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:15,581
I'm sure he doesn't
deal drugs anymore,
66
00:02:15,583 --> 00:02:17,151
he's probably like a...
67
00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:24,082
Drive.
68
00:02:24,084 --> 00:02:24,748
Drive!
69
00:02:24,750 --> 00:02:26,483
Go, go, go, go.
70
00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:33,182
♪ This is a resident evil
attack
71
00:02:33,184 --> 00:02:35,648
♪ Zombie take over,
boy watch your back
72
00:02:35,650 --> 00:02:38,049
♪ Infected disease,
unprotected
73
00:02:38,051 --> 00:02:40,515
♪ Soul catcher, listen,
everybody dress black
74
00:02:40,517 --> 00:02:42,848
♪ Good vs evil,
evil vs worse
75
00:02:42,850 --> 00:02:45,049
♪ Words for fella man,
words verse curse
76
00:02:45,051 --> 00:02:46,782
♪ Don't fuck with we
77
00:02:46,784 --> 00:02:48,915
♪ Somebody body
wanna fuck with we
78
00:02:48,917 --> 00:02:50,249
♪ An itchy itchy bombs gang
79
00:02:50,251 --> 00:02:52,782
♪ Oh...
80
00:02:52,784 --> 00:02:55,049
♪ Push the man with
the heavyweight sound
81
00:02:55,051 --> 00:02:57,615
♪ You ain't killing
what cannot be killed
82
00:02:57,617 --> 00:02:59,715
♪ I'm not joking,
the blood gets spilled
83
00:02:59,717 --> 00:03:02,082
♪ On the ground
you're gonna stay long
84
00:03:02,084 --> 00:03:04,615
♪ That's the way
cemetery gets filled
85
00:03:04,617 --> 00:03:07,049
♪ Oh...
86
00:03:07,051 --> 00:03:09,249
♪ No retreating,
no surrender
87
00:03:09,251 --> 00:03:11,915
♪ Oh...
88
00:03:11,917 --> 00:03:14,115
♪ Push the man with
the heavyweight sound
89
00:03:14,117 --> 00:03:16,782
♪ We running it,
gunning it
90
00:03:16,784 --> 00:03:19,049
♪ You know you can't
kill the power
91
00:03:19,051 --> 00:03:21,515
♪ Skinning it,
killing it
92
00:03:21,517 --> 00:03:24,084
♪ You know you can't
kill the power ♪
93
00:03:29,717 --> 00:03:31,515
See, I told you
we'd get here in time.
94
00:03:31,517 --> 00:03:32,982
What's happening,
fuckers?
95
00:03:32,984 --> 00:03:35,017
- Eh!
- Cheese!
96
00:03:37,583 --> 00:03:38,915
What the fuck
is Al Dennis doing here?
97
00:03:38,917 --> 00:03:40,615
I went to his wedding
so I had to invite him.
98
00:03:40,617 --> 00:03:41,782
But he's the most boring
man in the world.
99
00:03:41,784 --> 00:03:42,882
I know,
but for some reason
100
00:03:42,884 --> 00:03:43,915
he thinks we're
really good friends.
101
00:03:43,917 --> 00:03:46,717
- Sam, my buddy!
- Hey Al.
102
00:03:47,051 --> 00:03:49,581
Such an honor to be spending
the weekend with you.
103
00:03:49,583 --> 00:03:50,581
How's Rebecca?
104
00:03:50,583 --> 00:03:51,782
Rachel.
She's good.
105
00:03:51,784 --> 00:03:53,182
Great.
106
00:03:53,184 --> 00:03:54,917
Great!
107
00:03:58,583 --> 00:03:59,982
How you doing,
Brandon?
108
00:03:59,984 --> 00:04:01,049
Sam.
109
00:04:01,051 --> 00:04:03,117
Honestly, what does your
sister see in that prick?
110
00:04:04,517 --> 00:04:05,982
You alright, mate?
111
00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:07,184
How's Michelle?
112
00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:11,581
She's fine.
113
00:04:11,583 --> 00:04:13,715
Everyone, this is
Rachel's dad, Gerald.
114
00:04:13,717 --> 00:04:14,682
Gerald, Toby.
115
00:04:14,684 --> 00:04:15,648
- Hello, Toby.
- Hey.
116
00:04:15,650 --> 00:04:16,951
Eric.
117
00:04:18,550 --> 00:04:19,182
And Myles.
118
00:04:19,184 --> 00:04:20,650
Oh, we've met.
119
00:04:20,884 --> 00:04:22,215
Yes, of course.
120
00:04:22,217 --> 00:04:24,784
Right, now that boring
shite's out the way.
121
00:04:26,617 --> 00:04:27,684
Pass 'em down.
122
00:04:28,583 --> 00:04:29,782
Here you go.
123
00:04:29,784 --> 00:04:30,648
To Sam!
124
00:04:30,650 --> 00:04:31,884
- To Sam!
- Sam!
125
00:04:32,951 --> 00:04:34,483
Cheers.
126
00:04:56,184 --> 00:04:56,982
So that's sixty.
127
00:04:56,984 --> 00:04:57,815
How much was the
special breakfast?
128
00:04:57,817 --> 00:05:00,817
Oh, for fuck's sake,
just split it.
129
00:05:01,550 --> 00:05:03,715
I only had a coffee.
130
00:05:03,717 --> 00:05:04,915
You know, some of us
didn't sell our souls
131
00:05:04,917 --> 00:05:06,049
to earn stupid
amounts of money.
132
00:05:06,051 --> 00:05:07,682
And some of us
get paid in hard cash,
133
00:05:07,684 --> 00:05:09,715
and not smug vouchers.
134
00:05:09,717 --> 00:05:10,815
Anyway,
I didn't sell my soul.
135
00:05:10,817 --> 00:05:12,182
My job's cool, mate.
136
00:05:12,184 --> 00:05:13,915
You're a lawyer,
aren't you?
137
00:05:13,917 --> 00:05:14,848
Boring.
138
00:05:14,850 --> 00:05:15,982
If it's so boring,
how comes there's, like,
139
00:05:15,984 --> 00:05:18,215
billions of TV shows and films
written about lawyers?
140
00:05:18,217 --> 00:05:19,515
Hmm? You don't see
any TV shows
141
00:05:19,517 --> 00:05:21,182
about cancer researchers,
do you?
142
00:05:21,184 --> 00:05:21,982
No.
143
00:05:21,984 --> 00:05:23,015
Oh, are you curing cancer,
Toby?
144
00:05:23,017 --> 00:05:24,748
That's amazing.
145
00:05:24,750 --> 00:05:25,581
Thank you.
146
00:05:25,583 --> 00:05:26,481
There you go,
147
00:05:26,483 --> 00:05:27,815
five pounds worth
of smug right there.
148
00:05:27,817 --> 00:05:28,915
Kerching.
149
00:05:28,917 --> 00:05:30,249
You know why there's no
TV shows written
150
00:05:30,251 --> 00:05:31,848
about cancer researchers?
151
00:05:31,850 --> 00:05:33,548
Because it'd be one big
mystery at the start,
152
00:05:33,550 --> 00:05:34,715
and then season
after season,
153
00:05:34,717 --> 00:05:36,049
no one would ever
fucking solve it.
154
00:05:36,051 --> 00:05:37,782
Sounds a bit like Lost.
155
00:05:37,784 --> 00:05:40,082
But there you go.
156
00:05:40,084 --> 00:05:41,782
So, tell me, Eric,
157
00:05:41,784 --> 00:05:44,548
what exactly is this thing
we're going to.
158
00:05:44,550 --> 00:05:46,049
Yeah, tell us.
159
00:05:46,051 --> 00:05:47,949
It's a survival weekend.
160
00:05:47,951 --> 00:05:51,115
A hyper realistic simulation
of the apocalypse.
161
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:53,748
Humanity at its most raw.
162
00:05:53,750 --> 00:05:55,049
Living off the land.
163
00:05:55,051 --> 00:05:57,748
Fighting against the cruel
mother nature.
164
00:05:57,750 --> 00:06:00,682
All the while being
hunted by...
165
00:06:00,684 --> 00:06:02,483
the walking dead.
166
00:06:02,951 --> 00:06:04,982
It's paintball with twats
dressed as zombies.
167
00:06:04,984 --> 00:06:06,015
- Yeah.
- Sounds cool.
168
00:06:06,017 --> 00:06:06,715
Actually, it's like,
169
00:06:06,717 --> 00:06:08,515
run by loads
of ex-squaddies.
170
00:06:08,517 --> 00:06:09,748
Well, that stands
to reason.
171
00:06:09,750 --> 00:06:11,915
After a career
in the military,
172
00:06:11,917 --> 00:06:13,049
witnessing unspeakable
horrors,
173
00:06:13,051 --> 00:06:14,682
there's nothing you crave
more than a weekend spent
174
00:06:14,684 --> 00:06:16,782
running around the woods
playing puerile,
175
00:06:16,784 --> 00:06:18,748
make believe war games.
176
00:06:18,750 --> 00:06:20,282
Yeah, Sam said
you were in the army.
177
00:06:20,284 --> 00:06:21,049
Navy.
178
00:06:21,051 --> 00:06:22,548
Where was it
you served again?
179
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,015
That's classified.
180
00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:25,548
Of course, yeah.
Classified.
181
00:06:25,550 --> 00:06:28,548
He could tell you,
but he'd have to kill you.
182
00:06:28,550 --> 00:06:30,717
I could kill you.
183
00:06:31,650 --> 00:06:32,882
- Okay.
- Well, erm...
184
00:06:32,884 --> 00:06:34,715
thanks for organizing
this guys, anyway.
185
00:06:34,717 --> 00:06:36,015
Should be good fun.
186
00:06:36,017 --> 00:06:37,515
Fun?
187
00:06:37,517 --> 00:06:39,650
It's gonna be
awesomeballs.
188
00:06:40,017 --> 00:06:41,082
Sorry, what was that?
189
00:06:41,084 --> 00:06:42,548
Awesomeballs.
190
00:06:42,550 --> 00:06:44,550
It's a new word
I invented.
191
00:06:44,850 --> 00:06:46,149
Well, it sounded like
you were actually talking about
192
00:06:46,151 --> 00:06:48,149
a magnificent set
of testicles.
193
00:06:48,151 --> 00:06:49,782
I fucking like it.
194
00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:51,548
Nice one, Cheese.
Bosh.
195
00:06:51,550 --> 00:06:52,815
How was everything,
alright?
196
00:06:52,817 --> 00:06:54,615
- Yeah, fine, thanks.
- Beautiful, thanks.
197
00:06:54,617 --> 00:06:55,949
Actually, the rat...
198
00:06:55,951 --> 00:06:59,515
I'm assuming it was rat
was a smidgen dry,
199
00:06:59,517 --> 00:07:01,682
and this, uh, crappuccino
200
00:07:01,684 --> 00:07:03,817
tasted a little bit like,
um...
201
00:07:06,017 --> 00:07:08,815
yeah, I'm gonna say
it's monkey jizz.
202
00:07:08,817 --> 00:07:10,550
Monkey jizz.
203
00:07:11,517 --> 00:07:13,082
Anyone else got a...
Just me.
204
00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:14,249
You're so rude.
205
00:07:14,251 --> 00:07:16,115
Why can't you just say it's
fine like a normal person.
206
00:07:16,117 --> 00:07:17,982
Because it wasn't fine.
207
00:07:17,984 --> 00:07:19,115
It's for her own good,
mate.
208
00:07:19,117 --> 00:07:20,815
Two years time there'll be
a Starbucks down the road
209
00:07:20,817 --> 00:07:22,015
and she won't be able
to compete.
210
00:07:22,017 --> 00:07:22,949
It's positive feedback.
211
00:07:22,951 --> 00:07:24,115
I don't think "monkey jizz"
212
00:07:24,117 --> 00:07:25,848
ever counts as
positive feedback.
213
00:07:25,850 --> 00:07:28,548
Unless you're
sucking off a baboon.
214
00:07:28,550 --> 00:07:29,648
Yeah.
215
00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:31,084
Fair point.
216
00:07:41,717 --> 00:07:42,581
There's a weirdo
staring at you.
217
00:07:42,583 --> 00:07:44,117
Why is there a weirdo
staring at you?
218
00:07:45,184 --> 00:07:48,082
Presumably in response
to your foul language.
219
00:07:48,084 --> 00:07:49,182
My foul...?
220
00:07:49,184 --> 00:07:49,915
He said that.
221
00:07:49,917 --> 00:07:50,848
Jesus,
he looks like a psycho.
222
00:07:50,850 --> 00:07:53,548
Myles, apologies now
before I get killed.
223
00:07:53,550 --> 00:07:55,548
Never apologize, Sam,
it's a sign of weakness.
224
00:07:55,550 --> 00:07:56,448
We are weak!
225
00:07:56,450 --> 00:07:58,082
Maybe, but there's,
like, eight of us.
226
00:07:58,084 --> 00:07:59,817
What's he going to do?
227
00:08:01,217 --> 00:08:02,815
You alright, mate?
228
00:08:02,817 --> 00:08:04,450
Hmm?
229
00:08:04,850 --> 00:08:07,682
Hello?
Anyone home?
230
00:08:07,684 --> 00:08:08,481
No?
231
00:08:08,483 --> 00:08:09,815
I think we should
get out of here.
232
00:08:09,817 --> 00:08:11,149
Yeah.
233
00:08:11,151 --> 00:08:12,049
Jesus.
234
00:08:12,051 --> 00:08:13,717
Looks like we found
our first zombie.
235
00:08:26,517 --> 00:08:27,581
I'm not sure
this is right.
236
00:08:27,583 --> 00:08:28,848
Just keep going.
237
00:08:28,850 --> 00:08:30,015
There's no point
driving aimlessly.
238
00:08:30,017 --> 00:08:31,215
- We should ask someone.
- Good idea.
239
00:08:31,217 --> 00:08:32,748
Shall we ask this cow?
240
00:08:32,750 --> 00:08:34,817
Oh look,
there's a sign over there.
241
00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:38,915
A sinisterly worded,
misspelled sign,
242
00:08:38,917 --> 00:08:41,815
scrawled in what
appears to be blood.
243
00:08:41,817 --> 00:08:42,882
I say go for it.
244
00:08:42,884 --> 00:08:44,682
Yeah, they couldn't spell
in the emails either,
245
00:08:44,684 --> 00:08:46,483
so this is definitely it.
246
00:09:18,184 --> 00:09:19,748
Oh, yes.
247
00:09:19,750 --> 00:09:21,084
Boo.
248
00:09:23,084 --> 00:09:24,682
So what now?
249
00:09:24,684 --> 00:09:25,949
Err.
I dunno.
250
00:09:25,951 --> 00:09:27,583
I guess we just head up
to the...
251
00:09:28,217 --> 00:09:29,717
- Jesus!
- Oi!
252
00:09:30,084 --> 00:09:31,581
New recruits!
253
00:09:31,583 --> 00:09:33,982
Get yourselves
in here now!
254
00:09:33,984 --> 00:09:35,581
Oh, how delightful.
255
00:09:35,583 --> 00:09:38,515
Come on, move yourselves.
Faster. Faster!
256
00:09:38,517 --> 00:09:39,915
Bandages.
257
00:09:39,917 --> 00:09:41,215
- Antiseptic.
- Move yourselves!
258
00:09:41,217 --> 00:09:42,715
Will you hurry up?
259
00:09:42,717 --> 00:09:44,049
Give me a second.
260
00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,249
Compass.
261
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,149
Ropes.
262
00:09:46,151 --> 00:09:48,117
- What is all this?
- A survival kit.
263
00:09:48,850 --> 00:09:50,817
What the fuck is that?!
264
00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:52,949
It's a knife.
265
00:09:52,951 --> 00:09:54,548
I thought you said
it was paintballing.
266
00:09:54,550 --> 00:09:55,615
We might get lost
in the woods.
267
00:09:55,617 --> 00:09:58,581
I might have to hunt deer
or whittle something.
268
00:09:58,583 --> 00:10:00,249
Whittle?
You're a fucking mental.
269
00:10:00,251 --> 00:10:02,215
- Oi, you two!
- Whatevs.
270
00:10:02,217 --> 00:10:03,951
Get in here now!
271
00:10:04,684 --> 00:10:06,682
Move yourself faster!
272
00:10:06,684 --> 00:10:09,450
- Move yourself faster!
- Sorry, sorry. Sorry.
273
00:10:10,517 --> 00:10:12,450
My name is Marshall.
274
00:10:13,151 --> 00:10:16,684
And your name
is lucky son of a bitch.
275
00:10:18,617 --> 00:10:20,182
Lucky,
276
00:10:20,184 --> 00:10:22,717
cause you made it this far.
277
00:10:24,084 --> 00:10:27,850
But your journeys
are only just beginning.
278
00:10:29,517 --> 00:10:30,682
Now as you know,
279
00:10:30,684 --> 00:10:33,017
the world
has gone to hell.
280
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,550
The undead are
roaming the streets.
281
00:10:37,617 --> 00:10:39,817
And they've taken
over the cities.
282
00:10:40,550 --> 00:10:41,817
But we,
283
00:10:43,051 --> 00:10:44,750
we're gonna fight back.
284
00:10:45,850 --> 00:10:47,049
Are you with me?
285
00:10:47,051 --> 00:10:48,648
Sir, yes, sir!
286
00:10:48,650 --> 00:10:50,682
Yeah, woo-hoo!
287
00:10:50,684 --> 00:10:52,951
We got ourselves
a bit of a smart ass.
288
00:10:54,151 --> 00:10:57,450
So what, you don't think
our situation's serious?
289
00:10:58,850 --> 00:11:01,583
- Not really, no.
- Not really, no. No.
290
00:11:02,750 --> 00:11:05,815
Well get yourself down
and do twenty, now.
291
00:11:05,817 --> 00:11:06,915
Yeah, that's not
going to happen.
292
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,583
I said, give me twenty.
293
00:11:12,051 --> 00:11:13,583
Twenty!
294
00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:18,682
Right,
the enemy's deadly.
295
00:11:18,684 --> 00:11:20,848
He's fast,
he's powerful.
296
00:11:20,850 --> 00:11:22,715
Fearless.
297
00:11:22,717 --> 00:11:24,051
But you...
298
00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:26,951
you can beat him.
299
00:11:27,984 --> 00:11:29,215
Right,
300
00:11:29,217 --> 00:11:30,884
check your equipment.
301
00:11:31,217 --> 00:11:32,715
Start with your truncheon.
302
00:11:32,717 --> 00:11:34,215
Knife, you dickhead.
303
00:11:34,217 --> 00:11:36,215
Now, it may not
seem like much,
304
00:11:36,217 --> 00:11:38,581
but the undead's
body is soft.
305
00:11:38,583 --> 00:11:41,015
Repeated blows
with this implement
306
00:11:41,017 --> 00:11:43,715
and the zombie
will succumb.
307
00:11:43,717 --> 00:11:44,848
You're a fucking woman,
are you?
308
00:11:44,850 --> 00:11:47,615
Come on!
Hit it! Hit it!
309
00:11:47,617 --> 00:11:47,684
- I want to kill you!
- Hit the fucking thing!
310
00:11:51,951 --> 00:11:54,581
Next, you've got your
standard issue firearm.
311
00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:57,984
The T-70 single fire
assault rifle.
312
00:12:03,583 --> 00:12:05,117
Kill the primary.
313
00:12:07,850 --> 00:12:09,715
- Ow!
- It's working now.
314
00:12:09,717 --> 00:12:10,382
Fucking hell!
315
00:12:10,384 --> 00:12:12,115
The most important thing...
316
00:12:12,117 --> 00:12:15,182
the one thing
you must remember...
317
00:12:15,184 --> 00:12:18,684
is you never shoot
the target in the head.
318
00:12:20,051 --> 00:12:22,017
Always go for the body.
319
00:12:23,550 --> 00:12:24,583
Nonsense.
320
00:12:26,084 --> 00:12:27,548
You got something to say,
recruit?
321
00:12:27,550 --> 00:12:29,249
Sir, yes, sir!
322
00:12:29,251 --> 00:12:31,682
It's just that you should always
shoot a zombie in the head,
323
00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:33,115
sir.
324
00:12:33,117 --> 00:12:35,115
- Well not these ones.
- But...
325
00:12:35,117 --> 00:12:36,715
Are you back-chatting me,
fatty?
326
00:12:36,717 --> 00:12:39,115
Sir, no, sir!
Ow...
327
00:12:39,117 --> 00:12:40,082
Now you get down
on the floor,
328
00:12:40,084 --> 00:12:42,517
you fat piece of shit,
and give me twenty.
329
00:12:45,583 --> 00:12:48,748
You can truncheon the head,
but you do not shoot there!
330
00:12:48,750 --> 00:12:50,750
That just seems
inconsistent...
331
00:12:51,184 --> 00:12:53,717
Anyone else wanna talk
about consistency?
332
00:12:54,984 --> 00:12:57,215
Right,
you can talk the talk.
333
00:12:57,217 --> 00:12:59,715
Now it's time
to walk the walk.
334
00:12:59,717 --> 00:13:01,517
Need a volunteer.
335
00:13:02,850 --> 00:13:05,917
Which one of you has got
a pair of bollocks?
336
00:13:08,717 --> 00:13:11,084
Come on, you bunch
of fucking nonces!
337
00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:14,249
Go on, Sam.
You're the stag.
338
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:16,182
Oh, no, no,
I've got a bit of a...
339
00:13:16,184 --> 00:13:17,882
Sammy! Sammy!
340
00:13:17,884 --> 00:13:20,548
Sammy! Sammy! Sammy!
341
00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:23,182
Okay, okay, alright.
I'll volunteer.
342
00:13:23,184 --> 00:13:24,117
Good lad.
343
00:13:25,151 --> 00:13:26,817
Step up then, soldier.
344
00:13:27,617 --> 00:13:30,015
Now we're very lucky,
couple of weeks ago,
345
00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:31,984
to capture one
of the undead.
346
00:13:33,217 --> 00:13:35,182
Now he hasn't eaten
347
00:13:35,184 --> 00:13:36,817
and he's got
the right hump.
348
00:13:47,717 --> 00:13:49,115
Isn't that the guy
from the cafe?
349
00:13:49,117 --> 00:13:50,884
Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
350
00:13:56,017 --> 00:13:57,817
Well, go on,
shoot him!
351
00:14:08,884 --> 00:14:10,750
Oh, right.
352
00:14:20,151 --> 00:14:21,682
Use your truncheon.
353
00:14:21,684 --> 00:14:23,051
No, no, no...
354
00:14:27,650 --> 00:14:29,581
Well, go on,
hit him then!
355
00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:31,517
Fucking help me
you cunt balls!
356
00:14:32,951 --> 00:14:34,515
Go on, son,
hit him!
357
00:14:34,517 --> 00:14:36,951
Die!
Fucking die!
358
00:14:40,884 --> 00:14:43,515
I killed him!
359
00:14:43,517 --> 00:14:44,917
I fucking killed him!
360
00:14:53,217 --> 00:14:55,282
Right, soldiers.
361
00:14:55,284 --> 00:14:57,581
Your training is now
officially over.
362
00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:58,750
Move out!
363
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,782
Come on!
Come on!
364
00:15:03,784 --> 00:15:05,815
Move, move, move, move!
Get in there!
365
00:15:05,817 --> 00:15:08,015
Come on, speed up,
get yourself up there!
366
00:15:08,017 --> 00:15:09,015
In the back, now!
367
00:15:09,017 --> 00:15:09,782
Get in there!
368
00:15:09,784 --> 00:15:11,817
Hurry up! Hurry up!
369
00:15:12,684 --> 00:15:14,084
Right!
370
00:15:19,284 --> 00:15:21,750
Right, everybody grab
a ration pack and a map.
371
00:15:29,650 --> 00:15:31,717
Ah, thank God!
372
00:15:35,217 --> 00:15:37,182
Is that vodka?
373
00:15:37,184 --> 00:15:39,682
Now, you're gonna split
into two teams.
374
00:15:39,684 --> 00:15:42,249
Your mission is to
rendezvous at our bunker
375
00:15:42,251 --> 00:15:44,581
on the far side
of the woods by sundown.
376
00:15:44,583 --> 00:15:47,648
The bunker is marked
on your map as a large X.
377
00:15:47,650 --> 00:15:48,515
But be aware...
378
00:15:48,517 --> 00:15:50,949
these woods are teaming
with the undead.
379
00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:52,215
If you wanna make
it through alive,
380
00:15:52,217 --> 00:15:55,515
you'll have to stay alert
and work as a team.
381
00:15:55,517 --> 00:15:56,682
Any questions?
382
00:15:56,684 --> 00:15:58,581
Yeah,
I quite need a dump.
383
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,615
Is there anything by way
of toilet facilities
384
00:16:00,617 --> 00:16:02,682
before we get
to the bunker?
385
00:16:02,684 --> 00:16:03,815
Dig a hole, mate.
386
00:16:03,817 --> 00:16:04,648
Okay.
387
00:16:04,650 --> 00:16:06,682
Do you have
any toilet paper or...?
388
00:16:06,684 --> 00:16:07,715
Leaves.
389
00:16:07,717 --> 00:16:08,782
Leaves. Right.
390
00:16:08,784 --> 00:16:10,684
Try not to use
stinging nettles.
391
00:16:12,684 --> 00:16:13,882
Cocks.
392
00:16:13,884 --> 00:16:15,682
Do you want some heroin,
Myles?
393
00:16:15,684 --> 00:16:16,684
It'll clog you right up.
394
00:16:22,984 --> 00:16:24,682
That's hilarious,
Cheese.
395
00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,951
You've got to stop
with those great jokes.
396
00:16:28,051 --> 00:16:29,848
One minute
until die time,
397
00:16:29,850 --> 00:16:32,715
you bunch
of fucking pussies.
398
00:16:32,717 --> 00:16:36,949
So, you guys
were in the army?
399
00:16:36,951 --> 00:16:39,215
Uh, Gerald,
my father-in-law to be,
400
00:16:39,217 --> 00:16:41,515
he was in the army too,
right?
401
00:16:41,517 --> 00:16:43,015
Navy.
402
00:16:43,017 --> 00:16:44,682
Right.
403
00:16:44,684 --> 00:16:46,550
He was an officer though.
404
00:16:48,084 --> 00:16:51,882
Not to say that you guys
weren't officers, too.
405
00:16:51,884 --> 00:16:53,682
You could've been.
406
00:16:53,684 --> 00:16:55,082
Right?
407
00:16:55,084 --> 00:16:56,217
What do I know?
408
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:59,515
Where did you serve,
mate?
409
00:16:59,517 --> 00:17:01,583
That's classified.
410
00:17:02,951 --> 00:17:05,951
Good chat.
411
00:17:09,650 --> 00:17:12,217
First group!
412
00:17:13,917 --> 00:17:16,684
Right, well,
er, I'll go.
413
00:17:17,251 --> 00:17:18,815
Me too.
414
00:17:18,817 --> 00:17:20,082
- I'm in.
- Obviously.
415
00:17:20,084 --> 00:17:22,517
Actually, wait a second,
Myles.
416
00:17:23,650 --> 00:17:24,982
Gerald,
417
00:17:24,984 --> 00:17:28,182
as my future
father-in-law,
418
00:17:28,184 --> 00:17:31,483
would you like to take part
in this adventure with me?
419
00:17:33,951 --> 00:17:37,650
Nnnnnno.
420
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:04,982
I cannot believe you
were about to leave me
421
00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:07,049
with that weirdo Al and your
dickhead brother-in-law.
422
00:18:07,051 --> 00:18:07,848
You know,
right now,
423
00:18:07,850 --> 00:18:08,882
Cheese is probably
forcing Gerald
424
00:18:08,884 --> 00:18:11,548
to snort coke out
of some zombie's butt crack.
425
00:18:11,550 --> 00:18:13,015
If it's any consolation,
426
00:18:13,017 --> 00:18:14,548
I doubt whatever's happening
is going to leave
427
00:18:14,550 --> 00:18:16,215
a worse impression
than watching you
428
00:18:16,217 --> 00:18:18,215
getting dry humped
by that massive retard.
429
00:18:18,217 --> 00:18:19,015
That was your fault!
430
00:18:19,017 --> 00:18:20,882
I may have
antagonized him a bit,
431
00:18:20,884 --> 00:18:21,982
but the screaming
like a little girl
432
00:18:21,984 --> 00:18:23,548
that's on you, mate.
433
00:18:23,550 --> 00:18:24,982
Anyway, it doesn't explain
why the rest of them
434
00:18:24,984 --> 00:18:26,215
are so fucking nasty.
435
00:18:26,217 --> 00:18:27,182
I'd like to say it's PTSD,
436
00:18:27,184 --> 00:18:29,049
but frankly, I think
they're just wankers.
437
00:18:29,051 --> 00:18:30,548
They certainly take it
all very seriously.
438
00:18:30,550 --> 00:18:31,583
Yeah.
439
00:18:32,217 --> 00:18:33,815
Any idea what that means?
440
00:18:33,817 --> 00:18:34,915
Nope.
441
00:18:34,917 --> 00:18:35,949
How long till we
get there, Toby,
442
00:18:35,951 --> 00:18:37,715
I really need a shit.
443
00:18:37,717 --> 00:18:38,782
I dunno.
444
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:39,715
According to the compass
on my phone,
445
00:18:39,717 --> 00:18:41,015
I don't think we're
going the right way.
446
00:18:41,017 --> 00:18:42,483
Oi!
Cockhead!
447
00:18:43,684 --> 00:18:45,750
- Shh.
- Come here, you massive tool!
448
00:18:50,051 --> 00:18:51,548
Can you keep it down?
449
00:18:51,550 --> 00:18:53,848
Zombies have super
sensitive hearing.
450
00:18:53,850 --> 00:18:54,648
Okay, so firstly,
451
00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:55,715
I don't even think
that's a thing.
452
00:18:55,717 --> 00:18:56,648
- It definitely is a thing.
- It's not a thing.
453
00:18:56,650 --> 00:18:57,548
Secondly, they're not
actually zombies,
454
00:18:57,550 --> 00:18:59,515
they're a bunch of
psychotic squaddies
455
00:18:59,517 --> 00:19:00,682
in shitty make-up.
456
00:19:00,684 --> 00:19:02,215
Thirdly, what is the point
in us going on
457
00:19:02,217 --> 00:19:03,082
a zombie killing weekend
458
00:19:03,084 --> 00:19:04,815
if we're going to avoid
all the zombies?
459
00:19:04,817 --> 00:19:06,215
Yeah, otherwise
it's just a really
460
00:19:06,217 --> 00:19:08,182
- inappropriately dressed ramble.
- Exactly.
461
00:19:08,184 --> 00:19:09,548
Okay, well firstly,
462
00:19:09,550 --> 00:19:10,782
- fuck your mother.
- Right.
463
00:19:10,784 --> 00:19:12,515
- Secondly, how is your mother?
- She's fine, thanks.
464
00:19:12,517 --> 00:19:13,615
- Tell her I said hello.
- I will.
465
00:19:13,617 --> 00:19:15,515
And thirdly,
466
00:19:15,517 --> 00:19:16,882
what do you
actually want?
467
00:19:16,884 --> 00:19:18,548
Toby says you're
taking us the wrong way.
468
00:19:18,550 --> 00:19:20,115
Well, he's an idiot.
Look at him.
469
00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:21,982
I admit my PhD
wasn't in orienteering,
470
00:19:21,984 --> 00:19:23,515
but I think
I can read a map.
471
00:19:23,517 --> 00:19:25,115
- We're going North, right?
- Right.
472
00:19:25,117 --> 00:19:26,215
Fine.
North is that way.
473
00:19:26,217 --> 00:19:27,815
No, no, no,
no, no.
474
00:19:27,817 --> 00:19:30,149
North is that way.
475
00:19:30,151 --> 00:19:31,249
Not according
to my phone.
476
00:19:31,251 --> 00:19:33,715
Yeah, because
it's a bloody phone.
477
00:19:33,717 --> 00:19:35,548
I've got a proper compass,
bruv.
478
00:19:35,550 --> 00:19:36,648
Why have you got
a compass?
479
00:19:36,650 --> 00:19:38,182
- He's got a whole survival kit.
- Yeah, I do.
480
00:19:38,184 --> 00:19:39,682
And a huge fucking knife.
481
00:19:39,684 --> 00:19:40,815
- For whittling.
- Of course.
482
00:19:40,817 --> 00:19:41,815
Whittling, right.
483
00:19:41,817 --> 00:19:43,450
Let me see that compass.
484
00:19:45,850 --> 00:19:48,149
Right, the needle's
pointing that way.
485
00:19:48,151 --> 00:19:50,182
Yes, but we're
going North,
486
00:19:50,184 --> 00:19:51,949
which is "N" on the dial.
487
00:19:51,951 --> 00:19:53,850
Which means
we're going that way.
488
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,848
Do you mean the dial
you can just spin around?
489
00:19:56,850 --> 00:19:59,583
That changes direction depending
on which way you hold it.
490
00:20:00,750 --> 00:20:02,282
Must be broken.
491
00:20:02,284 --> 00:20:04,017
You're broken,
you moron.
492
00:20:04,717 --> 00:20:07,151
- I bet you wish you went with the other group now, eh?
- Yeah.
493
00:20:07,583 --> 00:20:08,882
Let's do this.
494
00:20:08,884 --> 00:20:10,015
Goggles on.
495
00:20:10,017 --> 00:20:11,182
Shut up.
496
00:20:11,184 --> 00:20:12,915
Guess you must be excited.
497
00:20:12,917 --> 00:20:14,249
About the wedding and all.
498
00:20:14,251 --> 00:20:15,949
Welcoming Sam
into the family.
499
00:20:15,951 --> 00:20:17,548
Hmm.
500
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:18,617
He's a diamond,
you know.
501
00:20:20,217 --> 00:20:21,648
What's that?
502
00:20:21,650 --> 00:20:23,684
Nothing.
Nothing at all.
503
00:20:24,217 --> 00:20:25,982
Listen, I know what it's like
to have a daughter.
504
00:20:25,984 --> 00:20:27,548
The never ending worry.
505
00:20:27,550 --> 00:20:29,249
- You have a daughter?
- I have a cat.
506
00:20:29,251 --> 00:20:30,316
Don't trust children.
507
00:20:30,318 --> 00:20:33,082
Always nicking your pills,
thinking they're sweets.
508
00:20:33,084 --> 00:20:34,782
But if Mrs. McFluff
was to make love to a man
509
00:20:34,784 --> 00:20:36,715
I'd want it to be Sam.
510
00:20:36,717 --> 00:20:39,682
He's kind, tender,
dependable.
511
00:20:39,684 --> 00:20:41,581
I admire your loyalty,
Cheese,
512
00:20:41,583 --> 00:20:42,715
I'll say that much.
513
00:20:42,717 --> 00:20:45,715
In the heat of battle
there are few better qualities.
514
00:20:45,717 --> 00:20:46,815
Oh, well if it's
loyalty you want,
515
00:20:46,817 --> 00:20:48,249
then Sam's your man.
516
00:20:48,251 --> 00:20:50,282
This one time at uni he
swallowed an entire ounce
517
00:20:50,284 --> 00:20:52,149
of weed to save me
from the rozzer.
518
00:20:52,151 --> 00:20:53,848
An entire ounce.
519
00:20:53,850 --> 00:20:55,249
It scarred him for life.
520
00:20:55,251 --> 00:20:57,082
Mainly due to the dubious
sexual experience
521
00:20:57,084 --> 00:20:58,249
he had when he was high,
522
00:20:58,251 --> 00:21:00,115
but that's what I call
integrity.
523
00:21:00,117 --> 00:21:02,149
Yeah, it's true,
when we used to work together,
524
00:21:02,151 --> 00:21:04,215
if ever Sam was
going to get a coffee,
525
00:21:04,217 --> 00:21:06,682
he would always
get one for me.
526
00:21:06,684 --> 00:21:08,115
Exactly.
That's what I'm saying.
527
00:21:08,117 --> 00:21:10,915
I'll take it under
advisement.
528
00:21:10,917 --> 00:21:13,648
Tell me, why do they
call you Cheese?
529
00:21:13,650 --> 00:21:16,249
Oh, I sense a crazy
story coming on.
530
00:21:16,251 --> 00:21:19,548
Yeah.
Well, no, actually.
531
00:21:19,550 --> 00:21:22,115
I just really
fucking like cheese.
532
00:21:22,117 --> 00:21:23,583
Look,
he wants the beer.
533
00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:25,982
Starting early.
534
00:21:25,984 --> 00:21:27,550
Yeah.
535
00:21:28,617 --> 00:21:30,648
Ooh, here he is
dressed as a lion.
536
00:21:30,650 --> 00:21:31,949
"As a lion."
537
00:21:31,951 --> 00:21:33,717
Very cute.
538
00:21:39,717 --> 00:21:41,483
No.
539
00:21:43,684 --> 00:21:45,017
Nope.
540
00:21:46,884 --> 00:21:48,550
Nope.
541
00:21:48,917 --> 00:21:52,850
Hmm.
Soft and furry.
542
00:21:53,217 --> 00:21:55,615
Like wiping with
an actual puppy.
543
00:21:55,617 --> 00:21:58,117
Okay.
Let's do this.
544
00:21:59,817 --> 00:22:00,615
Really?
545
00:22:00,617 --> 00:22:01,848
You're having soup
at the wedding?
546
00:22:01,850 --> 00:22:03,015
Billy loves soup.
547
00:22:03,017 --> 00:22:04,450
Yeah?
548
00:22:05,750 --> 00:22:07,515
Talk of the devil.
549
00:22:07,517 --> 00:22:08,682
Well, it's actually Suzy.
550
00:22:08,684 --> 00:22:09,984
I figured.
551
00:22:10,684 --> 00:22:12,117
Hey, babe.
552
00:22:13,251 --> 00:22:15,115
Yeah, it's great.
553
00:22:15,117 --> 00:22:16,850
Yeah, we're having
loads of fun.
554
00:22:17,750 --> 00:22:19,217
Nope.
555
00:22:20,517 --> 00:22:22,217
No, there are no
naked women.
556
00:22:22,884 --> 00:22:24,583
I promise.
557
00:22:24,984 --> 00:22:26,717
Yeah,
put him on.
558
00:22:28,084 --> 00:22:29,915
- Hello!
- Aw...
559
00:22:29,917 --> 00:22:31,282
Hello!
560
00:22:31,284 --> 00:22:33,115
Yeah, it's daddy.
561
00:22:33,117 --> 00:22:36,817
Yes, it is!
Yes, it is!
562
00:22:40,051 --> 00:22:41,149
Uh-huh.
563
00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:42,815
Okay, well
I'll see you tomorrow.
564
00:22:42,817 --> 00:22:44,750
Well give him
a big kiss from me.
565
00:22:45,984 --> 00:22:47,282
Okay, alright.
566
00:22:47,284 --> 00:22:48,917
Bye. Bye.
567
00:22:50,051 --> 00:22:50,848
What is your problem?
568
00:22:50,850 --> 00:22:52,682
I'll tell you what
my problem is.
569
00:22:52,684 --> 00:22:54,082
Take a look around you.
570
00:22:54,084 --> 00:22:56,115
We're at the mercy
of the elements.
571
00:22:56,117 --> 00:22:57,982
Face to face
with nature.
572
00:22:57,984 --> 00:23:00,115
At war with
a deadly enemy.
573
00:23:00,117 --> 00:23:02,782
For once,
you have the chance
574
00:23:02,784 --> 00:23:05,550
to experience real life
and your missing it.
575
00:23:06,051 --> 00:23:07,249
This is literally
not real life.
576
00:23:07,251 --> 00:23:08,648
Oh what
and screaming babies
577
00:23:08,650 --> 00:23:09,915
and wedding menus,
is that real life?
578
00:23:09,917 --> 00:23:11,682
Yes. Yes, it is.
That's what grown ups do.
579
00:23:11,684 --> 00:23:13,249
Yeah,
well it sounds shit!
580
00:23:13,251 --> 00:23:15,049
You know what,
I'm an idiot, right,
581
00:23:15,051 --> 00:23:16,082
I'm an idiot.
582
00:23:16,084 --> 00:23:18,682
I thought for one weekend,
just one weekend,
583
00:23:18,684 --> 00:23:21,117
we could all get together
like old times.
584
00:23:22,517 --> 00:23:24,450
The Crazy Crew.
585
00:23:24,984 --> 00:23:25,848
The Crazy Crew?
586
00:23:25,850 --> 00:23:27,149
What, you don't remember
the Crazy Crew?
587
00:23:27,151 --> 00:23:28,982
Crazy Crew!
588
00:23:28,984 --> 00:23:30,882
When I first moved
down South, the Crazy...
589
00:23:30,884 --> 00:23:32,015
Oh, I remember
the Crazy Crew.
590
00:23:32,017 --> 00:23:33,748
But there's a reason we
stopped calling ourselves that
591
00:23:33,750 --> 00:23:35,648
- when we were sixteen.
- It was a terrible name.
592
00:23:35,650 --> 00:23:36,715
For one.
593
00:23:36,717 --> 00:23:38,282
But also because none of us
were actually crazy.
594
00:23:38,284 --> 00:23:40,082
All we used to do was sit
around each other's houses
595
00:23:40,084 --> 00:23:41,882
eating pizza
chatting about how one day
596
00:23:41,884 --> 00:23:44,017
we might actually
talk to some girls.
597
00:23:47,784 --> 00:23:49,015
Fine.
598
00:23:49,017 --> 00:23:50,149
I won't talk about
Billy any more.
599
00:23:50,151 --> 00:23:51,049
And I'm more than happy
600
00:23:51,051 --> 00:23:52,748
not to talk about
weddings and stuff.
601
00:23:52,750 --> 00:23:54,149
Just so I know,
what sort of "crazy" shit
602
00:23:54,151 --> 00:23:55,750
can we talk about?
603
00:23:57,684 --> 00:24:00,217
Err, films.
604
00:24:03,017 --> 00:24:05,282
Football.
605
00:24:05,284 --> 00:24:08,617
Women who aren't
our wives or fiancées.
606
00:24:09,617 --> 00:24:12,115
I'm not really
into football, so...
607
00:24:12,117 --> 00:24:14,615
Ah, right, err...
608
00:24:14,617 --> 00:24:16,182
Anyone seen anything
609
00:24:16,184 --> 00:24:18,917
interesting at the flicks
recently?
610
00:24:20,284 --> 00:24:21,848
Don't think I've managed
to watch an entire film
611
00:24:21,850 --> 00:24:23,084
since Billy...
612
00:24:25,217 --> 00:24:27,483
Girls,
girls, girls then.
613
00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:30,483
You seeing anyone?
614
00:24:30,951 --> 00:24:32,450
No.
615
00:24:32,917 --> 00:24:34,583
Relax.
616
00:24:35,184 --> 00:24:37,750
Relax.
Think Zen thoughts.
617
00:24:38,717 --> 00:24:40,884
Namaste.
618
00:24:52,583 --> 00:24:53,215
Fuck.
619
00:24:53,217 --> 00:24:54,249
What about online dating?
620
00:24:54,251 --> 00:24:56,049
Get with the program,
grandma.
621
00:24:56,051 --> 00:24:58,715
Everyone's using apps now.
622
00:24:58,717 --> 00:25:01,548
- On your phone?
- No, on your balls.
623
00:25:01,550 --> 00:25:03,748
Well, why don't you
try that then?
624
00:25:03,750 --> 00:25:05,282
This girl at my work,
625
00:25:05,284 --> 00:25:06,982
she's on this Loved Up app,
626
00:25:06,984 --> 00:25:09,450
and she got fifteen
dick pics in a day.
627
00:25:10,517 --> 00:25:11,548
Are you worried girls
are going to send you
628
00:25:11,550 --> 00:25:12,416
pics of their cock?
629
00:25:12,418 --> 00:25:13,682
No, I just don't
want to send pictures
630
00:25:13,684 --> 00:25:15,715
of my junk to strangers.
631
00:25:15,717 --> 00:25:17,051
I've got a choad.
632
00:25:18,017 --> 00:25:19,982
You understand
you don't have to do that.
633
00:25:19,984 --> 00:25:21,082
Whatevs.
634
00:25:21,084 --> 00:25:24,249
Look, my point is, it's full
of weirdos and freaks.
635
00:25:24,251 --> 00:25:25,815
Oh my God!
636
00:25:25,817 --> 00:25:27,815
Jesus Christ, Myles.
637
00:25:27,817 --> 00:25:28,848
Lock and load, bitches.
638
00:25:28,850 --> 00:25:31,249
Myles!
639
00:25:31,251 --> 00:25:33,017
We're coming for you,
brother!
640
00:25:36,017 --> 00:25:37,617
Yes.
641
00:25:40,984 --> 00:25:42,750
Shall we?
642
00:26:01,517 --> 00:26:03,149
Die motherfuckers!
643
00:26:03,151 --> 00:26:04,750
Yeah!
644
00:26:12,151 --> 00:26:13,715
You alright?
645
00:26:13,717 --> 00:26:15,984
It's the booze.
I'll catch you up.
646
00:26:16,251 --> 00:26:17,617
Okay.
647
00:26:23,583 --> 00:26:25,951
Shit.
648
00:26:27,750 --> 00:26:29,450
Oh God.
649
00:27:16,750 --> 00:27:18,282
Come on, mate.
650
00:27:18,284 --> 00:27:19,984
This is all just
a big game.
651
00:27:21,151 --> 00:27:22,684
Right?
652
00:27:37,884 --> 00:27:40,217
What did you fucking do?
653
00:27:46,917 --> 00:27:48,817
Oh fuck!
654
00:28:01,284 --> 00:28:04,249
Oh fuck!
Oh fuck!
655
00:28:04,251 --> 00:28:06,915
Oh fuck! Oh fuck!
Oh fuck!
656
00:28:06,917 --> 00:28:08,215
Oh fuck! Oh fuck...!
657
00:28:08,217 --> 00:28:09,581
Three zombies down.
658
00:28:09,583 --> 00:28:11,682
- Bosh!
- Crazy Crew's back, baby!
659
00:28:11,684 --> 00:28:13,049
Looks like Sam
bagged one, too.
660
00:28:13,051 --> 00:28:14,015
Awesomeballs!
661
00:28:14,017 --> 00:28:15,782
- I killed him!
- Yeah, I know, I can see.
662
00:28:15,784 --> 00:28:17,882
- I killed him!
- Yeah, alright Sam. We get it.
663
00:28:17,884 --> 00:28:18,648
What's up
with this guy?
664
00:28:18,650 --> 00:28:19,715
No, no, no,
you don't get it.
665
00:28:19,717 --> 00:28:22,182
I'm trying to tell you
that I fucking killed him!
666
00:28:22,184 --> 00:28:24,249
When you say "killed",
do you mean...
667
00:28:24,251 --> 00:28:26,115
Fucking dead.
Dead, dead.
668
00:28:26,117 --> 00:28:28,049
Like, not stupid
fucking pretend dead.
669
00:28:28,051 --> 00:28:29,850
Actual dead.
670
00:28:30,984 --> 00:28:31,815
You killed him.
671
00:28:31,817 --> 00:28:33,748
I know, that's what
I just told you!
672
00:28:33,750 --> 00:28:35,615
- Why did you do that?
- It was by mistake.
673
00:28:35,617 --> 00:28:36,982
He was attacking me
674
00:28:36,984 --> 00:28:38,648
and he was very scary
and then...
675
00:28:38,650 --> 00:28:39,815
I... I...
676
00:28:39,817 --> 00:28:42,483
- So you stabbed him through the heart?!
- Uh-huh.
677
00:28:43,017 --> 00:28:43,949
Oh fuck.
678
00:28:43,951 --> 00:28:47,815
Yeah, but let's get
this in perspective.
679
00:28:47,817 --> 00:28:49,648
He was already dead.
680
00:28:49,650 --> 00:28:51,182
What is wrong with you?
681
00:28:51,184 --> 00:28:53,182
You alright muchachos?
682
00:28:53,184 --> 00:28:55,249
The good news is,
I mullered a zombie.
683
00:28:55,251 --> 00:28:57,282
The bad news is, I was
unsuccessful in my dump.
684
00:28:57,284 --> 00:28:58,648
What the fuck?!
685
00:28:58,650 --> 00:28:59,648
Sam killed him.
686
00:28:59,650 --> 00:29:01,848
- Why?
- I didn't mean to.
687
00:29:01,850 --> 00:29:04,483
I was scared and I dropped
the truncheon and...
688
00:29:07,117 --> 00:29:08,915
Help!
689
00:29:08,917 --> 00:29:12,051
Oh thank God,
he's alive!
690
00:29:17,717 --> 00:29:19,882
What the hell
did you just do?!
691
00:29:19,884 --> 00:29:21,049
He was reanimating.
692
00:29:21,051 --> 00:29:22,648
He wasn't
a fucking zombie!
693
00:29:22,650 --> 00:29:24,515
Yeah,
maybe not before.
694
00:29:24,517 --> 00:29:25,815
But we all just saw that.
695
00:29:25,817 --> 00:29:28,548
He just said,
"Brains."
696
00:29:28,550 --> 00:29:30,184
He said, "Help."
697
00:29:30,583 --> 00:29:32,515
- I'm gonna fucking kill you!
- What is your problem?
698
00:29:32,517 --> 00:29:34,249
You're the stupidest
bloody person I've ever met!
699
00:29:34,251 --> 00:29:35,149
Just relax!
700
00:29:35,151 --> 00:29:36,782
Both of you relax,
okay?
701
00:29:36,784 --> 00:29:38,581
Myles has a plan that's
going to make all of this
702
00:29:38,583 --> 00:29:39,915
just go away.
703
00:29:39,917 --> 00:29:40,982
- You do?
- Yeah.
704
00:29:40,984 --> 00:29:43,015
- What is it?
- Simple, okay.
705
00:29:43,017 --> 00:29:45,715
We bury the body
under a tree.
706
00:29:45,717 --> 00:29:47,748
We keep our mouths shut.
707
00:29:47,750 --> 00:29:50,149
And hope no one notices.
You're welcome.
708
00:29:50,151 --> 00:29:51,615
- Hope no one notices?!
- Yeah.
709
00:29:51,617 --> 00:29:52,882
- That is not a plan!
- Course it is,
710
00:29:52,884 --> 00:29:54,015
it's a fucking classic.
711
00:29:54,017 --> 00:29:55,515
Trust me,
this is my bag, baby.
712
00:29:55,517 --> 00:29:56,615
I'm a lawyer.
713
00:29:56,617 --> 00:29:58,149
You're a corporate lawyer,
you negotiate contracts.
714
00:29:58,151 --> 00:29:59,982
Look. Look,
we take his phone, okay?
715
00:29:59,984 --> 00:30:00,882
We keep sending texts
716
00:30:00,884 --> 00:30:02,682
to make it seem like
he's still alive,
717
00:30:02,684 --> 00:30:04,515
and by the time anyone's
figured out something's wrong
718
00:30:04,517 --> 00:30:05,982
ten groups will have
been through here.
719
00:30:05,984 --> 00:30:07,581
And these woods are big.
720
00:30:07,583 --> 00:30:09,015
It'll be weeks before
they find the body.
721
00:30:09,017 --> 00:30:10,548
They won't get
an accurate time of death.
722
00:30:10,550 --> 00:30:11,782
- This could work.
- No way.
723
00:30:11,784 --> 00:30:13,917
Okay.
Then we settle.
724
00:30:15,051 --> 00:30:16,717
We pay them off.
725
00:30:17,784 --> 00:30:19,215
Are you suggesting
we give them money
726
00:30:19,217 --> 00:30:21,282
to ignore the fact that
we killed their friend?
727
00:30:21,284 --> 00:30:22,684
Uh-huh.
728
00:30:24,184 --> 00:30:25,949
- How much money?
- I don't know, they look kind of povo.
729
00:30:25,951 --> 00:30:27,182
I reckon ten,
twenty grand a piece
730
00:30:27,184 --> 00:30:28,115
will keep them quiet.
731
00:30:28,117 --> 00:30:29,715
You'd ignore our murders
for twenty grand?
732
00:30:29,717 --> 00:30:30,581
Of course not, mate.
I'm already rich.
733
00:30:30,583 --> 00:30:32,115
I'd let someone
take out Eric for, say,
734
00:30:32,117 --> 00:30:33,082
I don't know,
a hundred?
735
00:30:33,084 --> 00:30:34,548
A hundred grand?
736
00:30:34,550 --> 00:30:35,382
Cheers, bro.
737
00:30:35,384 --> 00:30:36,615
No. Apart from the fact
I don't have
738
00:30:36,617 --> 00:30:37,448
twenty grand spare,
739
00:30:37,450 --> 00:30:39,648
that is a completely
ridiculous idea.
740
00:30:39,650 --> 00:30:41,581
We could frame Brandon.
He's a massive dickhead.
741
00:30:41,583 --> 00:30:42,149
That's true.
742
00:30:42,151 --> 00:30:44,082
No,
no, no, no!
743
00:30:44,084 --> 00:30:46,748
We're not paying anyone off
or framing anyone.
744
00:30:46,750 --> 00:30:47,581
Okay?
745
00:30:47,583 --> 00:30:48,316
We've got no choice.
746
00:30:48,318 --> 00:30:49,215
We'll have to go
to the police.
747
00:30:49,217 --> 00:30:50,282
The police?
748
00:30:50,284 --> 00:30:51,581
Sam and Eric
will go to prison.
749
00:30:51,583 --> 00:30:52,715
You understand that,
right?
750
00:30:52,717 --> 00:30:53,581
It was a mistake.
751
00:30:53,583 --> 00:30:55,982
Eric may go down
for mental incompetence
752
00:30:55,984 --> 00:30:57,648
and Sam,
maybe manslaughter,
753
00:30:57,650 --> 00:30:59,049
but that is still
hard time.
754
00:30:59,051 --> 00:31:00,548
Sam won't stand a chance
755
00:31:00,550 --> 00:31:02,082
I dunno, he seems pretty
good at shanking people.
756
00:31:02,084 --> 00:31:02,949
I can't go to prison
757
00:31:02,951 --> 00:31:04,949
I'm getting married
in three weeks.
758
00:31:04,951 --> 00:31:06,682
Rachel will be devastated.
759
00:31:06,684 --> 00:31:09,049
Gerald would never
forgive me!
760
00:31:09,051 --> 00:31:09,882
Look Toby,
761
00:31:09,884 --> 00:31:11,682
if you insist on
going down this way,
762
00:31:11,684 --> 00:31:13,784
we're not going to kill you
to silence you, okay.
763
00:31:14,917 --> 00:31:15,982
I didn't think you were
till you said that.
764
00:31:15,984 --> 00:31:17,715
Why would you...
765
00:31:17,717 --> 00:31:18,515
why are you talking
about killing me?
766
00:31:18,517 --> 00:31:19,815
I said we're not
going to kill you.
767
00:31:19,817 --> 00:31:20,815
But it'd crossed
your mind!
768
00:31:20,817 --> 00:31:21,882
It crossed my mind.
769
00:31:21,884 --> 00:31:22,815
All I'm saying is,
770
00:31:22,817 --> 00:31:25,149
is that you signed
the Crazy Crew charter
771
00:31:25,151 --> 00:31:26,748
just like the rest of us.
772
00:31:26,750 --> 00:31:29,149
And article twelve of the
Crazy Crew charter says,
773
00:31:29,151 --> 00:31:31,182
"Always have
a brother's back."
774
00:31:31,184 --> 00:31:32,115
Always.
775
00:31:32,117 --> 00:31:33,349
We were fourteen.
776
00:31:33,351 --> 00:31:35,049
We were talking about girls
and fights in the playground,
777
00:31:35,051 --> 00:31:37,049
not conspiracy
to fucking murder!
778
00:31:37,051 --> 00:31:38,581
- I think it was implicit.
- Totally.
779
00:31:38,583 --> 00:31:40,615
Guys, guys,
I have a son
780
00:31:40,617 --> 00:31:41,715
to think about now,
okay?
781
00:31:41,717 --> 00:31:44,049
Oh, you promised you weren't
going to talk about him.
782
00:31:44,051 --> 00:31:45,648
You promised
not to murder anyone!
783
00:31:45,650 --> 00:31:46,848
No, I bloody didn't!
784
00:31:46,850 --> 00:31:49,815
But fine.
Let's talk about Billy.
785
00:31:49,817 --> 00:31:51,282
How long have you
known this guy?
786
00:31:51,284 --> 00:31:52,249
Eight months.
787
00:31:52,251 --> 00:31:53,982
And has he ever said
anything interesting?
788
00:31:53,984 --> 00:31:54,848
No.
789
00:31:54,850 --> 00:31:56,082
Has he ever done
anything interesting?
790
00:31:56,084 --> 00:31:56,815
No.
791
00:31:56,817 --> 00:31:57,915
You've known Sam
for twenty years
792
00:31:57,917 --> 00:32:01,282
and he has said and done
lots of interesting things,
793
00:32:01,284 --> 00:32:02,782
so I just can't understand
794
00:32:02,784 --> 00:32:06,082
how you can possibly
prefer Billy over Sam!
795
00:32:06,084 --> 00:32:07,548
You're not even human.
796
00:32:07,550 --> 00:32:08,648
Let's face it,
797
00:32:08,650 --> 00:32:10,648
Billy could be the most
boring person in the world,
798
00:32:10,650 --> 00:32:11,982
or a complete twat.
799
00:32:11,984 --> 00:32:13,249
And you're going to throw
away your friendship
800
00:32:13,251 --> 00:32:14,949
with Sam for that?
801
00:32:14,951 --> 00:32:17,282
One day you'll grow up
and understand responsibility.
802
00:32:17,284 --> 00:32:18,215
Billy needs me.
803
00:32:18,217 --> 00:32:20,084
"Billy needs me!"
804
00:32:21,817 --> 00:32:22,815
What the fuck
are you doing?
805
00:32:22,817 --> 00:32:24,215
If you let Toby
wipe your bum,
806
00:32:24,217 --> 00:32:25,515
he won't send you
to prison.
807
00:32:25,517 --> 00:32:26,884
Stop it!
808
00:32:28,151 --> 00:32:30,548
Look, Toby's right.
809
00:32:30,550 --> 00:32:32,615
He has got a son
to think of.
810
00:32:32,617 --> 00:32:34,682
And even if little
Billy is boring.
811
00:32:34,684 --> 00:32:35,682
Or a twat.
812
00:32:35,684 --> 00:32:37,882
He's your little twat.
813
00:32:37,884 --> 00:32:40,017
Your responsibility.
814
00:32:40,217 --> 00:32:42,951
This is my responsibility,
my fault.
815
00:32:43,817 --> 00:32:45,617
I have to take the fall.
816
00:32:49,550 --> 00:32:51,617
I've got no reception.
817
00:32:53,684 --> 00:32:55,583
Can I borrow yours please?
818
00:32:59,817 --> 00:33:02,517
Oh, for fuck's sake.
819
00:33:03,684 --> 00:33:06,215
So I said, "How the hell
can she have chlamydia?
820
00:33:06,217 --> 00:33:07,249
I always taught her
to rubber up."
821
00:33:07,251 --> 00:33:09,949
Ah yes, but feline chlamydia
is often passed on
822
00:33:09,951 --> 00:33:11,682
from mother to kitten.
823
00:33:11,684 --> 00:33:13,750
Yeah, that's what
they said.
824
00:33:22,017 --> 00:33:23,750
Ow!
825
00:33:24,817 --> 00:33:26,782
Oh, you wanker.
826
00:33:26,784 --> 00:33:28,084
And regroup!
827
00:33:28,884 --> 00:33:30,215
I'll tell you one thing,
Gerry,
828
00:33:30,217 --> 00:33:31,215
you don't have to
worry about Sam
829
00:33:31,217 --> 00:33:33,215
giving your daughter
any STD's.
830
00:33:33,217 --> 00:33:34,815
He's very hygienic.
831
00:33:34,817 --> 00:33:36,648
Ooh,
what an accolade.
832
00:33:36,650 --> 00:33:37,882
Yeah, it's true that.
833
00:33:37,884 --> 00:33:40,982
I happen to know for
a fact that he flosses.
834
00:33:40,984 --> 00:33:43,117
Yeah, his teeth though,
not his cock.
835
00:33:43,951 --> 00:33:45,483
True. True.
836
00:34:10,617 --> 00:34:11,951
Let me get rid of that.
837
00:34:13,184 --> 00:34:14,182
Are you kidding...
838
00:34:14,184 --> 00:34:16,682
You just smeared his DNA
all over your clothes!
839
00:34:16,684 --> 00:34:17,581
Oops.
840
00:34:17,583 --> 00:34:19,215
Maybe you want to
wank onto his face.
841
00:34:19,217 --> 00:34:20,982
Make the prosecution's
case watertight.
842
00:34:20,984 --> 00:34:22,648
I'll wank onto your face.
843
00:34:22,650 --> 00:34:24,217
How is that a comeback?
844
00:34:25,784 --> 00:34:27,717
S.P. Dowie.
845
00:34:27,951 --> 00:34:29,550
One bank card.
846
00:34:29,984 --> 00:34:32,115
Two condoms.
Ribbed for her pleasure.
847
00:34:32,117 --> 00:34:33,249
Very thoughtful.
848
00:34:33,251 --> 00:34:34,915
And a Nando's
loyalty card.
849
00:34:34,917 --> 00:34:35,848
Alright.
850
00:34:35,850 --> 00:34:37,782
Oh, are we stealing from
the dead now, too?
851
00:34:37,784 --> 00:34:38,982
Toby, if we're going
to convince people
852
00:34:38,984 --> 00:34:39,848
this guy's still alive
853
00:34:39,850 --> 00:34:41,648
we need to keep
his cards operational.
854
00:34:41,650 --> 00:34:42,581
Okay?
855
00:34:42,583 --> 00:34:43,249
If that means I get a free
quarter chicken
856
00:34:43,251 --> 00:34:43,982
now and then,
so be it.
857
00:34:43,984 --> 00:34:45,615
- Medium?
- Mango and lime.
858
00:34:45,617 --> 00:34:46,615
- Interesting.
- Mmm.
859
00:34:46,617 --> 00:34:47,684
Oh.
Hold on.
860
00:34:51,984 --> 00:34:53,850
Bingo.
Whoo.
861
00:34:57,951 --> 00:34:58,915
Balls.
862
00:34:58,917 --> 00:35:01,581
I need his passcode
to change his passcode.
863
00:35:01,583 --> 00:35:02,249
You'll have to
keep pressing it,
864
00:35:02,251 --> 00:35:03,684
make sure
it doesn't lock.
865
00:35:04,550 --> 00:35:05,650
Or...
866
00:35:08,617 --> 00:35:09,682
No!
867
00:35:09,684 --> 00:35:10,984
No, you can't!
868
00:35:15,750 --> 00:35:18,848
- Jesus Christ...
- Our lord.
869
00:35:18,850 --> 00:35:21,951
Blessed art thou
in all your glory.
870
00:35:23,617 --> 00:35:25,517
Etcetera, etcetera.
871
00:35:26,550 --> 00:35:29,884
Today we offer you
our good friend...
872
00:35:33,583 --> 00:35:35,149
Steve?
873
00:35:35,151 --> 00:35:37,782
Steve's not really
a zombie name.
874
00:35:37,784 --> 00:35:39,282
- He wasn't a zombie.
- Graah.
875
00:35:39,284 --> 00:35:40,815
Now that's a zombie name.
876
00:35:40,817 --> 00:35:43,015
- He wasn't a zombie.
- It began with "S".
877
00:35:43,017 --> 00:35:43,915
Sluor.
878
00:35:43,917 --> 00:35:45,682
Now that's a proper
good zombie name.
879
00:35:45,684 --> 00:35:47,650
- He wasn't a zombie.
- One second.
880
00:35:48,217 --> 00:35:50,151
Oh, for crying
out loud.
881
00:35:50,517 --> 00:35:51,615
It was Steve.
882
00:35:51,617 --> 00:35:53,184
- Good guess, Sam.
- Thanks!
883
00:35:57,217 --> 00:35:57,951
Lord.
884
00:35:59,217 --> 00:36:01,583
Please take Steve
885
00:36:03,151 --> 00:36:06,082
into your holy kingdom
886
00:36:06,084 --> 00:36:09,684
and treat him with kindness
for all eternity.
887
00:36:10,917 --> 00:36:14,115
I remember the first time
I met Steve.
888
00:36:14,117 --> 00:36:16,515
He was eyeballing me
from across the cafe
889
00:36:16,517 --> 00:36:17,848
because of something
Myles had said
890
00:36:17,850 --> 00:36:19,049
about monkey jizz.
891
00:36:19,051 --> 00:36:20,917
- Positive feedback.
- Great times.
892
00:36:22,284 --> 00:36:23,949
And although I didn't
get the chance
893
00:36:23,951 --> 00:36:26,982
to get to know him
as much as I'd have liked,
894
00:36:26,984 --> 00:36:28,982
from the small time
we spent together
895
00:36:28,984 --> 00:36:31,684
I could tell
that Steve was a...
896
00:36:33,850 --> 00:36:35,715
- Was a...
- A bit of a cunt?
897
00:36:35,717 --> 00:36:36,481
A bit of a cunt.
Yeah.
898
00:36:36,483 --> 00:36:38,517
- Bless him, he was.
- Yeah.
899
00:36:39,750 --> 00:36:41,149
- Amen?
- Amen.
900
00:36:41,151 --> 00:36:42,049
We good with God now?
901
00:36:42,051 --> 00:36:43,717
- Defo.
- Right.
902
00:36:51,117 --> 00:36:52,182
You should've seen
the look on
903
00:36:52,184 --> 00:36:54,684
that stuck up prick's face
when I snuck up on him.
904
00:36:55,850 --> 00:36:57,550
What do you think of that?
905
00:36:58,217 --> 00:36:59,282
She's rough, mate.
906
00:36:59,284 --> 00:37:01,949
What are you talking about?
Look at those tits.
907
00:37:01,951 --> 00:37:03,682
You fucked a pig, mate.
908
00:37:03,684 --> 00:37:04,581
What do you think, Cam?
909
00:37:04,583 --> 00:37:05,548
At least it was female.
910
00:37:05,550 --> 00:37:06,715
I thought he was
a fucking poof.
911
00:37:06,717 --> 00:37:08,082
Oh, piss off.
912
00:37:08,084 --> 00:37:09,715
Oh, yeah!
913
00:37:09,717 --> 00:37:11,982
Four hundred feet
per second.
914
00:37:11,984 --> 00:37:14,949
One eighty five pound
draw weight.
915
00:37:14,951 --> 00:37:15,949
Nice.
916
00:37:15,951 --> 00:37:17,450
Fucking should be
for a grand.
917
00:37:17,984 --> 00:37:19,748
So when are we gonna
go bag a deer then, eh?
918
00:37:19,750 --> 00:37:21,049
You and me?
919
00:37:21,051 --> 00:37:22,117
Never.
920
00:37:22,717 --> 00:37:25,082
- Oi, you fucking prick!
- Sorry, mate. Finger slipped.
921
00:37:25,084 --> 00:37:27,581
- I just bought that!
- Oi, rein it in!
922
00:37:27,583 --> 00:37:29,615
Any of you fucking monkeys
know where Steve is?
923
00:37:29,617 --> 00:37:31,015
He was with us
on the first run.
924
00:37:31,017 --> 00:37:31,982
Don't know after that.
925
00:37:31,984 --> 00:37:33,115
Check the bog.
926
00:37:33,117 --> 00:37:34,748
One o'clock's
his wank time.
927
00:37:34,750 --> 00:37:35,548
Right, ten minutes
928
00:37:35,550 --> 00:37:37,117
then back out
for the next run.
929
00:37:38,550 --> 00:37:40,017
Wank time.
930
00:37:53,117 --> 00:37:55,082
Can I please have
some water now?
931
00:37:55,084 --> 00:37:56,884
I think I'm getting
dehydrated.
932
00:37:59,850 --> 00:38:00,615
You twat.
933
00:38:00,617 --> 00:38:02,215
Stag rules
are still in effect.
934
00:38:02,217 --> 00:38:05,149
Whoo. This guy
really had no life.
935
00:38:05,151 --> 00:38:07,115
No parents.
No girlfriend.
936
00:38:07,117 --> 00:38:08,715
Barely any friends.
937
00:38:08,717 --> 00:38:09,581
Honestly, I don't think
938
00:38:09,583 --> 00:38:10,715
a single person's
going to miss him.
939
00:38:10,717 --> 00:38:11,949
Brilliant!
940
00:38:11,951 --> 00:38:13,648
You two are awful
human beings.
941
00:38:13,650 --> 00:38:15,581
Oh, he is on
Loved Up though.
942
00:38:15,583 --> 00:38:16,615
Oh, let's have a look.
943
00:38:16,617 --> 00:38:17,984
Is that the thing you
were telling me about?
944
00:38:18,650 --> 00:38:20,015
So, Loved Up.
945
00:38:20,017 --> 00:38:23,115
You search, right,
for girls in your local area,
946
00:38:23,117 --> 00:38:25,949
let's say aged between
twenty-two and thirty-five,
947
00:38:25,951 --> 00:38:26,748
right?
948
00:38:26,750 --> 00:38:29,782
And their profiles
pop up, like so.
949
00:38:29,784 --> 00:38:32,249
So, Mandy?
Hmm.
950
00:38:32,251 --> 00:38:34,249
What do we think
about Mandy?
951
00:38:34,251 --> 00:38:37,715
Erm, well she's...
she's...
952
00:38:37,717 --> 00:38:38,782
She's a no.
953
00:38:38,784 --> 00:38:41,215
So we swipe Mandy that way,
and Mandy disappears
954
00:38:41,217 --> 00:38:43,984
and now she's
replaced by Natasha.
955
00:38:44,550 --> 00:38:45,850
No.
956
00:38:46,550 --> 00:38:47,782
Annabelle?
957
00:38:47,784 --> 00:38:48,815
No.
958
00:38:48,817 --> 00:38:50,615
- Melissa?
- No.
959
00:38:50,617 --> 00:38:52,082
- Elizabeth?
- No.
960
00:38:52,084 --> 00:38:54,015
Oh, hello, Veronica.
961
00:38:54,017 --> 00:38:55,282
Ah, yeah.
962
00:38:55,284 --> 00:38:58,648
We like Veronica,
so we swipe this way and...
963
00:38:58,650 --> 00:39:00,715
Holy shit!
964
00:39:00,717 --> 00:39:02,049
It's a match.
965
00:39:02,051 --> 00:39:03,215
She likes us, too?
966
00:39:03,217 --> 00:39:04,249
Yeah.
967
00:39:04,251 --> 00:39:05,848
Cool,
so what do we do now?
968
00:39:05,850 --> 00:39:06,848
I don't know.
969
00:39:06,850 --> 00:39:07,848
I suppose we send her
pictures of our cocks.
970
00:39:07,850 --> 00:39:10,215
You don't have to send
a picture of your cock.
971
00:39:10,217 --> 00:39:11,715
Oh yeah,
you're right.
972
00:39:11,717 --> 00:39:12,715
It could be anyone's.
973
00:39:12,717 --> 00:39:14,615
How can she tell
the difference?
974
00:39:14,617 --> 00:39:16,049
Unless there's something
in the picture
975
00:39:16,051 --> 00:39:17,249
to give it scale,
976
00:39:17,251 --> 00:39:19,049
they basically
look the same.
977
00:39:19,051 --> 00:39:21,515
I've never had a girl
like that like me.
978
00:39:21,517 --> 00:39:23,049
Yeah,
one small problem.
979
00:39:23,051 --> 00:39:25,982
She doesn't actually like you,
she likes Steve.
980
00:39:25,984 --> 00:39:27,682
Oh yeah.
981
00:39:27,684 --> 00:39:28,984
Shit.
982
00:39:31,284 --> 00:39:33,915
Oh, text from
Sergeant Marshall.
983
00:39:33,917 --> 00:39:34,648
Yeah?
984
00:39:34,650 --> 00:39:35,782
"Where are you?"
985
00:39:35,784 --> 00:39:37,882
Okay, okay,
text back,
986
00:39:37,884 --> 00:39:39,882
"Feel like shite, boss.
987
00:39:39,884 --> 00:39:41,915
Gone home.
Sorry".
988
00:39:41,917 --> 00:39:42,782
Sent.
989
00:39:42,784 --> 00:39:44,115
- Do you think that'll work?
- Yeah.
990
00:39:44,117 --> 00:39:45,548
It better work.
991
00:39:45,550 --> 00:39:48,015
Reply.
992
00:39:48,017 --> 00:39:49,949
"See you next Saturday".
993
00:39:49,951 --> 00:39:50,949
Boom!
994
00:39:50,951 --> 00:39:52,949
And just like that we've
bought ourselves a week.
995
00:39:52,951 --> 00:39:54,483
Sweet!
996
00:40:11,850 --> 00:40:13,715
And, of course,
my great grandfather,
997
00:40:13,717 --> 00:40:16,049
Commodore Corfield
played a prominent role
998
00:40:16,051 --> 00:40:17,848
in the Dervish war.
999
00:40:17,850 --> 00:40:20,782
He was known by the locals
as "Aleunsuriat Alqasia",
1000
00:40:20,784 --> 00:40:24,748
which loosely translates as,
"Cruel racist".
1001
00:40:24,750 --> 00:40:26,015
It was probably
a compliment at that time.
1002
00:40:26,017 --> 00:40:27,115
I should say.
1003
00:40:27,117 --> 00:40:30,015
After him my grandfather
captained a frigate in Burma
1004
00:40:30,017 --> 00:40:34,615
and then my father served
aboard the HMS Black Swan.
1005
00:40:34,617 --> 00:40:36,581
The Battle of
Chumonchin Chan.
1006
00:40:36,583 --> 00:40:38,249
Indeed.
1007
00:40:38,251 --> 00:40:39,581
I fucking love
getting baked
1008
00:40:39,583 --> 00:40:41,215
and watching
the History Channel.
1009
00:40:41,217 --> 00:40:43,682
You should try Jurassic
Fight Club on ketamine.
1010
00:40:43,684 --> 00:40:44,282
It's brutal.
1011
00:40:44,284 --> 00:40:45,882
I don't doubt it.
1012
00:40:45,884 --> 00:40:48,548
So, yes, after eleven
generations of naval men,
1013
00:40:48,550 --> 00:40:51,015
I suppose my fate
was inevitable.
1014
00:40:51,017 --> 00:40:52,782
And yourself?
1015
00:40:52,784 --> 00:40:54,682
Well, my old man
was a dustman.
1016
00:40:54,684 --> 00:40:56,517
Who wore
a dustman's hat?
1017
00:40:57,784 --> 00:40:59,917
No, I don't think
he had a hat.
1018
00:41:00,817 --> 00:41:02,548
So, yeah, I could've
gone into that,
1019
00:41:02,550 --> 00:41:05,115
and then I thought early
mornings and shit pay,
1020
00:41:05,117 --> 00:41:07,848
figured it made more sense
to just blag my way into uni,
1021
00:41:07,850 --> 00:41:09,082
deal a few drugs
1022
00:41:09,084 --> 00:41:11,648
and hang out as long
as humanly possible.
1023
00:41:11,650 --> 00:41:13,750
Thoroughly understandable.
1024
00:41:19,850 --> 00:41:20,748
So I'm thinking,
1025
00:41:20,750 --> 00:41:21,615
come Tuesday or Wednesday
big Steve's
1026
00:41:21,617 --> 00:41:23,949
going to have
a major life rethink,
1027
00:41:23,951 --> 00:41:25,648
quit his job,
move down South
1028
00:41:25,650 --> 00:41:27,882
and pursue his dream
of becoming a banker.
1029
00:41:27,884 --> 00:41:29,615
We sell that,
we're home and dry.
1030
00:41:29,617 --> 00:41:30,951
Nice.
1031
00:41:31,650 --> 00:41:33,149
What is it?
1032
00:41:33,151 --> 00:41:34,882
Is it the bunker?
1033
00:41:34,884 --> 00:41:36,215
It looks like a cabin.
1034
00:41:36,217 --> 00:41:38,682
Ah, maybe
they've got water.
1035
00:41:38,684 --> 00:41:40,748
Maybe they've got
a toilet.
1036
00:41:40,750 --> 00:41:43,017
We really are the
Crazy Crew, aren't we?
1037
00:41:50,784 --> 00:41:51,581
Should we knock?
1038
00:41:51,583 --> 00:41:53,717
I don't think
anyone lives here.
1039
00:41:57,117 --> 00:41:58,850
Hello.
1040
00:42:01,284 --> 00:42:03,184
Hello!
1041
00:42:21,951 --> 00:42:24,217
Hello.
1042
00:42:26,684 --> 00:42:28,684
Anybody home?
1043
00:42:51,251 --> 00:42:53,750
No one's been
here in months.
1044
00:43:09,951 --> 00:43:11,583
Oh my God!
1045
00:43:12,117 --> 00:43:14,848
There is bog roll,
and it's quilted.
1046
00:43:14,850 --> 00:43:16,182
Awesomeballs!
1047
00:43:16,184 --> 00:43:17,615
I'll see you in ten.
1048
00:43:17,617 --> 00:43:19,817
And you thought
it wouldn't catch on.
1049
00:43:20,684 --> 00:43:22,750
Let's check for supplies.
1050
00:43:28,750 --> 00:43:30,715
I dunno, I think
this is someone's house.
1051
00:43:30,717 --> 00:43:31,949
Nah, whoever it was
would've fled
1052
00:43:31,951 --> 00:43:33,817
when the infection started.
1053
00:43:34,617 --> 00:43:36,215
Whoa, whoa,
what you doing?
1054
00:43:36,217 --> 00:43:37,884
Oi!
1055
00:43:39,251 --> 00:43:41,581
- Have a beer.
- There are beers?
1056
00:43:41,583 --> 00:43:42,782
This is definitely
someone's house.
1057
00:43:42,784 --> 00:43:43,715
Well, you wouldn't
take your beer
1058
00:43:43,717 --> 00:43:44,915
if you had to flee
an infection, would you?
1059
00:43:44,917 --> 00:43:45,915
There is no infection.
1060
00:43:45,917 --> 00:43:48,149
Well, maybe the organizers
left them for us.
1061
00:43:48,151 --> 00:43:49,548
They knew
we were a stag do.
1062
00:43:49,550 --> 00:43:51,149
So why is there milk?
1063
00:43:51,151 --> 00:43:52,715
Cup of tea?
1064
00:43:52,717 --> 00:43:53,882
Yeah?
1065
00:43:53,884 --> 00:43:55,217
And what about the pig
out back?
1066
00:43:57,850 --> 00:43:59,949
Bacon butty?
1067
00:43:59,951 --> 00:44:02,517
Yeah, no, we should
get out of here.
1068
00:44:05,951 --> 00:44:07,049
Shit!
1069
00:44:07,051 --> 00:44:09,051
- Uh...
- The window.
1070
00:44:10,017 --> 00:44:11,615
Oh bollocks!
1071
00:44:11,617 --> 00:44:12,648
Quick, hide!
1072
00:44:12,650 --> 00:44:14,784
Err, here!
1073
00:44:16,151 --> 00:44:17,884
Come on!
1074
00:44:18,084 --> 00:44:19,982
There's not much
space in here!
1075
00:44:19,984 --> 00:44:20,748
Ow!
1076
00:44:20,750 --> 00:44:21,782
There's tons
of room in there!
1077
00:44:21,784 --> 00:44:23,015
I'm not a fucking cat!
1078
00:44:23,017 --> 00:44:24,715
Just turn round,
tuck your legs in!
1079
00:44:24,717 --> 00:44:27,184
Ow! Ow!
I'm stuck!
1080
00:44:33,884 --> 00:44:35,717
I can't see,
1081
00:44:36,217 --> 00:44:38,951
but I feel like something
might've happened.
1082
00:44:39,717 --> 00:44:42,149
What the fuck are you
doing in my house?
1083
00:44:42,151 --> 00:44:43,715
I understand
this looks bad,
1084
00:44:43,717 --> 00:44:46,715
but there's actually a perfectly
reasonable explanation.
1085
00:44:46,717 --> 00:44:47,815
True, there is.
1086
00:44:47,817 --> 00:44:49,915
- You see, we thought it was empty
- It's not empty.
1087
00:44:49,917 --> 00:44:51,715
We didn't think
anyone lived here.
1088
00:44:51,717 --> 00:44:53,115
Now why would you
think that?
1089
00:44:53,117 --> 00:44:55,750
Well,
it's a bit of a shithole.
1090
00:44:56,583 --> 00:44:57,648
Shithole?!
1091
00:44:57,650 --> 00:44:58,715
He said that,
not me.
1092
00:44:58,717 --> 00:45:00,082
What's he doing
in my cupboard?
1093
00:45:00,084 --> 00:45:01,215
Well, erm...
1094
00:45:01,217 --> 00:45:02,715
Are you drinking my beer?!
1095
00:45:02,717 --> 00:45:03,982
No, no,
well, yes.
1096
00:45:03,984 --> 00:45:05,782
I'm gonna fucking kill...
1097
00:45:05,784 --> 00:45:06,782
Right!
1098
00:45:06,784 --> 00:45:08,882
Right! Right!
1099
00:45:08,884 --> 00:45:10,581
That's it!
I've had enough!
1100
00:45:10,583 --> 00:45:12,648
All of you,
all day, overreacting,
1101
00:45:12,650 --> 00:45:14,782
behaving like bloody lunatics!
1102
00:45:14,784 --> 00:45:16,115
Sam, apologize
to this gentleman.
1103
00:45:16,117 --> 00:45:17,951
- Oh, but...
- Just do it!
1104
00:45:19,617 --> 00:45:20,982
I'm sorry.
1105
00:45:20,984 --> 00:45:22,982
- Fuck off.
- And you.
1106
00:45:22,984 --> 00:45:25,715
You need to take a long,
hard look at yourself.
1107
00:45:25,717 --> 00:45:27,082
This place is a shithole.
1108
00:45:27,084 --> 00:45:28,949
When was the last time you
cleaned your rooms, huh?
1109
00:45:28,951 --> 00:45:30,815
And what on Earth
were you thinking,
1110
00:45:30,817 --> 00:45:33,848
storming in like that
threatening to kill us?
1111
00:45:33,850 --> 00:45:36,049
You're a little old man,
there's three of us!
1112
00:45:36,051 --> 00:45:37,215
Honestly, at your age,
1113
00:45:37,217 --> 00:45:39,082
you should be ashamed
of yourself.
1114
00:45:39,084 --> 00:45:40,848
Now you need
to take a moment,
1115
00:45:40,850 --> 00:45:43,750
take a deep breath
and calm the hell down!
1116
00:45:50,550 --> 00:45:52,215
I'll show you
fucking calm!
1117
00:45:52,217 --> 00:45:54,051
No, no, no,
just wait, wait!
1118
00:46:00,917 --> 00:46:04,117
Time to shut that big
fucking mouth of yours.
1119
00:46:04,684 --> 00:46:06,684
You're a dead man!
1120
00:46:18,550 --> 00:46:19,982
Oh shit.
1121
00:46:19,984 --> 00:46:21,815
What's happening guys?
1122
00:46:21,817 --> 00:46:24,182
Oh shit.
1123
00:46:24,184 --> 00:46:25,082
Guys?
1124
00:46:25,084 --> 00:46:26,648
That was not my fault.
1125
00:46:26,650 --> 00:46:27,882
Guys,
what the hell is go...
1126
00:46:27,884 --> 00:46:29,249
Oh, for crying out loud.
1127
00:46:29,251 --> 00:46:30,215
It's not my fault.
1128
00:46:30,217 --> 00:46:31,782
How comes every time
I go to squeeze one out
1129
00:46:31,784 --> 00:46:32,748
you end up
killing someone, eh?
1130
00:46:32,750 --> 00:46:34,615
It was a heart attack.
It's natural causes.
1131
00:46:34,617 --> 00:46:35,581
Yeah,
I know,
1132
00:46:35,583 --> 00:46:36,815
I'm sure the coroner
will come to that exact
1133
00:46:36,817 --> 00:46:37,715
same conclusion
when he pulls
1134
00:46:37,717 --> 00:46:39,982
the fucking knife
out of his chest.
1135
00:46:39,984 --> 00:46:42,750
- It looks bad, doesn't it?
- Just a little bit, yeah.
1136
00:46:44,517 --> 00:46:46,717
Can someone help me
out of here, please?
1137
00:46:47,251 --> 00:46:48,717
Right.
1138
00:47:02,184 --> 00:47:03,049
So in about a mile
1139
00:47:03,051 --> 00:47:04,115
there should be a road
off to the left,
1140
00:47:04,117 --> 00:47:05,715
and then it's just a few
hundred meters from there.
1141
00:47:05,717 --> 00:47:06,850
Okay.
1142
00:47:07,550 --> 00:47:09,249
- Slow down, will you?
- I'm not even speeding.
1143
00:47:09,251 --> 00:47:11,115
The last thing we want
is to get pulled over.
1144
00:47:11,117 --> 00:47:12,882
Why would there be
any police out here?
1145
00:47:12,884 --> 00:47:15,815
Oh, other than all the
murders you've been doing.
1146
00:47:15,817 --> 00:47:17,115
Look,
it's four o'clock already.
1147
00:47:17,117 --> 00:47:18,149
We need to get
to the rendezvous point
1148
00:47:18,151 --> 00:47:19,815
before anyone starts
getting suspicious, okay?
1149
00:47:19,817 --> 00:47:20,949
Yeah, and we don't
want to leave Gerald
1150
00:47:20,951 --> 00:47:22,815
with that lot
longer than we have to.
1151
00:47:22,817 --> 00:47:23,848
Well we're not going
to get there very quickly
1152
00:47:23,850 --> 00:47:24,782
if we crash, are we?
1153
00:47:24,784 --> 00:47:26,249
Oh, just because you drive
like Miss Daisy,
1154
00:47:26,251 --> 00:47:27,715
doesn't make you
a safer driver.
1155
00:47:27,717 --> 00:47:28,515
Yes, it does.
1156
00:47:28,517 --> 00:47:29,848
No, you plod along
like a snail,
1157
00:47:29,850 --> 00:47:30,982
but your brain's
all over the place
1158
00:47:30,984 --> 00:47:32,581
thinking about
a million other things,
1159
00:47:32,583 --> 00:47:33,848
blissfully unaware
of all the carnage
1160
00:47:33,850 --> 00:47:34,715
your causing around you.
1161
00:47:34,717 --> 00:47:37,249
I, on the other hand,
am switched on,
1162
00:47:37,251 --> 00:47:38,982
in the moment
and focussed.
1163
00:47:38,984 --> 00:47:40,548
If you say so.
1164
00:47:40,550 --> 00:47:43,017
So who do you guys think
is the safer driver, me or Toby?
1165
00:47:48,617 --> 00:47:50,515
Right.
1166
00:47:50,517 --> 00:47:52,117
Ah.
1167
00:48:08,117 --> 00:48:09,550
Hello.
1168
00:48:11,884 --> 00:48:12,982
Hello!
1169
00:48:12,984 --> 00:48:13,982
Sam, his head and legs
are pointing
1170
00:48:13,984 --> 00:48:15,817
in opposite directions.
1171
00:48:17,784 --> 00:48:19,617
In for a penny.
1172
00:48:19,984 --> 00:48:21,581
Come on.
1173
00:48:21,583 --> 00:48:23,051
- I'll get his head.
- Yeah.
1174
00:48:26,817 --> 00:48:28,848
- Let me get this straight.
- Mm-hmm.
1175
00:48:28,850 --> 00:48:31,949
- The old man kills the two zombies.
- Yeah.
1176
00:48:31,951 --> 00:48:33,115
And then in a fit
of guilt,
1177
00:48:33,117 --> 00:48:34,682
decides to take
his own life.
1178
00:48:34,684 --> 00:48:35,715
Yes.
1179
00:48:35,717 --> 00:48:37,115
By committing harakiri
1180
00:48:37,117 --> 00:48:38,715
whilst driving his car
into the lake.
1181
00:48:38,717 --> 00:48:39,982
Exactly.
1182
00:48:39,984 --> 00:48:41,215
That's believable.
1183
00:48:41,217 --> 00:48:43,648
Look, all we need
is reasonable doubt.
1184
00:48:43,650 --> 00:48:45,117
You got a better idea?
1185
00:48:46,784 --> 00:48:48,049
- No.
- Right.
1186
00:48:48,051 --> 00:48:49,282
Let's do this.
1187
00:48:49,284 --> 00:48:52,517
One,
two, three!
1188
00:49:15,051 --> 00:49:17,149
Yeah, that's fine.
1189
00:49:17,151 --> 00:49:19,483
Yeah, it'll do.
Job done.
1190
00:49:32,251 --> 00:49:33,982
Fascinating.
1191
00:49:33,984 --> 00:49:35,617
Simply fascinating.
1192
00:49:37,251 --> 00:49:39,049
This place is amazing.
1193
00:49:39,051 --> 00:49:41,182
There's another two floors
below this one,
1194
00:49:41,184 --> 00:49:42,581
but it's all taped off.
1195
00:49:42,583 --> 00:49:44,082
Which could probably
be explained by the fact
1196
00:49:44,084 --> 00:49:46,715
I found this hidden away
in the corner.
1197
00:49:46,717 --> 00:49:50,115
So, bear in mind that
all the while you marvel
1198
00:49:50,117 --> 00:49:52,249
at the museum pieces,
1199
00:49:52,251 --> 00:49:53,748
your swimmers
are being mutated
1200
00:49:53,750 --> 00:49:55,515
by some second
world war plutonium.
1201
00:49:55,517 --> 00:49:57,049
Don't be ridiculous,
mate.
1202
00:49:57,051 --> 00:49:58,249
This place is cold war.
1203
00:49:58,251 --> 00:49:59,782
Well met, Cheese.
1204
00:49:59,784 --> 00:50:00,782
Oh, my bad.
1205
00:50:00,784 --> 00:50:02,581
Tell you who would've
also known that Gerry.
1206
00:50:02,583 --> 00:50:03,648
Sam.
1207
00:50:03,650 --> 00:50:05,748
- He's a genius.
- Is that so?
1208
00:50:05,750 --> 00:50:06,748
Nope.
1209
00:50:06,750 --> 00:50:07,515
Oh yeah?
1210
00:50:07,517 --> 00:50:09,682
Well then how comes
he's a...
1211
00:50:09,684 --> 00:50:11,548
Al, what is it
you lot do again?
1212
00:50:11,550 --> 00:50:12,581
Well, when I
worked with him
1213
00:50:12,583 --> 00:50:14,015
we did data entry.
1214
00:50:14,017 --> 00:50:15,748
Data.
Exactly.
1215
00:50:15,750 --> 00:50:17,015
You don't get
to enter "data"
1216
00:50:17,017 --> 00:50:18,748
without being pretty
damn smart, do you?
1217
00:50:18,750 --> 00:50:21,015
About a year ago,
Sam started this new diet.
1218
00:50:21,017 --> 00:50:22,282
He was convinced
1219
00:50:22,284 --> 00:50:23,748
that he could live
perfectly healthily
1220
00:50:23,750 --> 00:50:26,782
by only ever eating
extra strong mints.
1221
00:50:26,784 --> 00:50:27,915
Yeah, well,
1222
00:50:27,917 --> 00:50:29,782
that's fucking true,
isn't it?
1223
00:50:29,784 --> 00:50:31,615
Have a look at the packet.
1224
00:50:31,617 --> 00:50:34,015
Fat, carbohydrate,
protein.
1225
00:50:34,017 --> 00:50:35,115
That's the lot,
basically.
1226
00:50:35,117 --> 00:50:36,748
It's what they call
a superfood.
1227
00:50:36,750 --> 00:50:38,149
Gerry?
1228
00:50:38,151 --> 00:50:39,650
Thank you.
1229
00:50:43,850 --> 00:50:45,017
Hmm.
1230
00:50:56,017 --> 00:50:56,815
You made me look like
1231
00:50:56,817 --> 00:50:58,581
a right fucking tranny,
you bitch!
1232
00:50:58,583 --> 00:51:00,117
Did I?
1233
00:51:05,884 --> 00:51:06,682
Yeah,
you alright, Sarge?
1234
00:51:06,684 --> 00:51:07,949
Jenks,
I'm in the bunker, mate.
1235
00:51:07,951 --> 00:51:09,115
Just waiting for
the second group.
1236
00:51:09,117 --> 00:51:10,115
Should be ready
for you in a bit.
1237
00:51:10,117 --> 00:51:11,748
Alright, well we're ready
to go here, mate.
1238
00:51:11,750 --> 00:51:13,215
We're a bit short
fucking staffed.
1239
00:51:13,217 --> 00:51:14,882
Steve's still missing,
1240
00:51:14,884 --> 00:51:17,015
and now Dennis
has gone AWOL.
1241
00:51:17,017 --> 00:51:18,015
What's his excuse?
1242
00:51:18,017 --> 00:51:18,949
I dunno.
1243
00:51:18,951 --> 00:51:20,149
Dougie dropped him off
at Sharpe's Quarry
1244
00:51:20,151 --> 00:51:21,581
on the last run.
1245
00:51:21,583 --> 00:51:22,848
Last anybody saw of him.
1246
00:51:22,850 --> 00:51:23,548
You don't think him
and Steve
1247
00:51:23,550 --> 00:51:24,951
are up to something,
do you?
1248
00:51:25,784 --> 00:51:27,715
What exactly did
Steve's text say?
1249
00:51:27,717 --> 00:51:29,548
He said he was sick,
1250
00:51:29,550 --> 00:51:31,750
and then he said something
about awesome balls.
1251
00:51:32,850 --> 00:51:35,115
Awesome balls?
1252
00:51:35,117 --> 00:51:36,282
What the fuck
does that mean?
1253
00:51:36,284 --> 00:51:37,349
I've no idea, mate.
1254
00:51:37,351 --> 00:51:39,648
Listen, do me a favor,
take a couple of the boys,
1255
00:51:39,650 --> 00:51:41,784
go and have a look round,
alright, just in case.
1256
00:51:43,650 --> 00:51:44,951
Right!
1257
00:51:46,583 --> 00:51:47,815
Remember,
1258
00:51:47,817 --> 00:51:49,249
we all keep
our stories straight
1259
00:51:49,251 --> 00:51:51,049
and everything's going
to be fine, okay?
1260
00:51:51,051 --> 00:51:52,515
What are we going
to say to Gerald?
1261
00:51:52,517 --> 00:51:54,049
- He's gonna know.
- Jesus, Sam,
1262
00:51:54,051 --> 00:51:55,715
will you stop worrying
about bloody Gerald.
1263
00:51:55,717 --> 00:51:57,082
Why do you care so much
about what he thinks?
1264
00:51:57,084 --> 00:51:58,782
Er, because he's
my father-in-law
1265
00:51:58,784 --> 00:51:59,949
and he clearly
doesn't like me.
1266
00:51:59,951 --> 00:52:00,982
Of course he
doesn't like you,
1267
00:52:00,984 --> 00:52:02,715
you jizz on his daughter.
1268
00:52:02,717 --> 00:52:03,848
So what?
Fuck him.
1269
00:52:03,850 --> 00:52:04,581
Fuck him.
1270
00:52:04,583 --> 00:52:05,515
Fuck him and his
stiff upper lip.
1271
00:52:05,517 --> 00:52:07,548
Fuck him and his fake
military history.
1272
00:52:07,550 --> 00:52:09,949
- I expect you've killed more people than him.
- Exactly.
1273
00:52:09,951 --> 00:52:13,049
However, for the
purposes of the here
1274
00:52:13,051 --> 00:52:14,282
and the now,
1275
00:52:14,284 --> 00:52:18,850
we definitely didn't
kill anyone, right?
1276
00:52:19,984 --> 00:52:21,082
Right.
1277
00:52:21,084 --> 00:52:22,550
Obviously.
1278
00:52:26,817 --> 00:52:28,550
Gotcha.
1279
00:52:37,517 --> 00:52:38,882
- Ah!
- Sammy!
1280
00:52:38,884 --> 00:52:41,515
Look who decided
to join the festivities.
1281
00:52:41,517 --> 00:52:42,615
Hi, guys.
1282
00:52:42,617 --> 00:52:44,483
Let me beer you up, bro.
1283
00:52:45,017 --> 00:52:46,748
I'm having the best time.
1284
00:52:46,750 --> 00:52:49,915
Hey, are you guys all having
as much fun as us nutters?
1285
00:52:49,917 --> 00:52:52,615
Oh yeah!
1286
00:52:52,617 --> 00:52:54,548
- It's been wicked.
- Absolutely.
1287
00:52:54,550 --> 00:52:55,717
Alright, boys.
1288
00:52:56,151 --> 00:53:00,217
Cheese,
what the fuuuuuu... okay.
1289
00:53:09,251 --> 00:53:12,984
That was exemplary chronic.
1290
00:53:13,817 --> 00:53:15,082
Sam?
1291
00:53:15,084 --> 00:53:15,915
Huh?
1292
00:53:15,917 --> 00:53:17,049
Take a hit.
1293
00:53:17,051 --> 00:53:19,782
Oh no, no,
I don't, it makes me...
1294
00:53:19,784 --> 00:53:21,715
I had a bad experience
one time.
1295
00:53:21,717 --> 00:53:24,049
I know, Sam,
don't worry.
1296
00:53:24,051 --> 00:53:26,650
No one's going to
do that to you here.
1297
00:53:27,051 --> 00:53:29,848
Come on, Sam,
don't be an enormous pussy!
1298
00:53:29,850 --> 00:53:32,215
Oh, well, I guess
I could do a little bit.
1299
00:53:32,217 --> 00:53:33,815
- You don't have to.
- Yes he does.
1300
00:53:33,817 --> 00:53:35,182
Wouldn't he be
less of a pussy
1301
00:53:35,184 --> 00:53:37,082
if he just said no?
1302
00:53:37,084 --> 00:53:38,149
Nope.
1303
00:53:38,151 --> 00:53:40,282
It's fine, guys.
1304
00:53:40,284 --> 00:53:42,316
I can do a little bit.
1305
00:53:42,318 --> 00:53:43,984
Go on, Sam.
1306
00:53:52,884 --> 00:53:54,581
Hold it.
1307
00:53:54,583 --> 00:53:56,015
Hold it.
1308
00:53:56,017 --> 00:53:58,782
Hold it! Hold it!
Hold it!
1309
00:53:58,784 --> 00:54:01,848
Hold it! Hold it!
Hold it!
1310
00:54:01,850 --> 00:54:03,049
Hold it...!
1311
00:54:03,051 --> 00:54:04,982
You finally made it
back then.
1312
00:54:04,984 --> 00:54:06,049
What kept you?
1313
00:54:06,051 --> 00:54:07,650
Nothing.
1314
00:54:08,184 --> 00:54:09,915
Did you meet
much resistance?
1315
00:54:09,917 --> 00:54:11,648
How many did you kill
then, soldier?
1316
00:54:11,650 --> 00:54:12,515
Kill?
1317
00:54:12,517 --> 00:54:14,215
No, no, no, we've not
killed anyone.
1318
00:54:14,217 --> 00:54:16,515
- No, no, no. Nobody.
- No, nobody, nada.
1319
00:54:16,517 --> 00:54:17,648
What do you mean, you made
it all the way back here
1320
00:54:17,650 --> 00:54:19,684
without running into
any undead?
1321
00:54:20,151 --> 00:54:22,815
Of course,
we killed quite a few zombies.
1322
00:54:22,817 --> 00:54:24,149
Er, four?
1323
00:54:24,151 --> 00:54:25,515
No, no, five.
1324
00:54:25,517 --> 00:54:27,617
Sam's just a bit confused
from all the...
1325
00:54:29,917 --> 00:54:31,915
Sam actually killed two
all by himself.
1326
00:54:31,917 --> 00:54:33,517
It was quite impressive.
1327
00:54:34,184 --> 00:54:35,782
Well let's not get
ahead of ourselves.
1328
00:54:35,784 --> 00:54:37,615
Plenty of work
to be done yet.
1329
00:54:37,617 --> 00:54:39,648
Now dusk is approaching
1330
00:54:39,650 --> 00:54:42,548
and come nightfall the undead
will be back in force.
1331
00:54:42,550 --> 00:54:44,648
Now we need to lock
this place down
1332
00:54:44,650 --> 00:54:46,615
and prepare
for the onslaught.
1333
00:54:46,617 --> 00:54:48,615
But before we do,
1334
00:54:48,617 --> 00:54:50,648
someone wants to have
a little word with you.
1335
00:54:50,650 --> 00:54:52,117
- Me?
- You.
1336
00:54:56,650 --> 00:54:58,617
Police Constable Diamond!
1337
00:54:59,117 --> 00:55:01,215
Samuel Ward?
1338
00:55:01,217 --> 00:55:01,949
Yeah.
1339
00:55:01,951 --> 00:55:05,115
You're in
a lot of trouble.
1340
00:55:05,117 --> 00:55:08,082
I know what you've done.
1341
00:55:08,084 --> 00:55:12,782
- But, erm...
- You've been a bad,
1342
00:55:12,784 --> 00:55:15,517
bad, bad boy.
1343
00:55:29,517 --> 00:55:31,184
Right, come on lads,
get in there!
1344
00:55:31,817 --> 00:55:33,581
♪ Yeah well
1345
00:55:33,583 --> 00:55:37,450
♪ You know what I got
from my reputation before
1346
00:55:39,184 --> 00:55:41,017
♪ I smashed the law
1347
00:55:42,517 --> 00:55:43,515
Uh-huh.
1348
00:55:43,517 --> 00:55:45,215
I'm sure we definitely
said no to strippers.
1349
00:55:45,217 --> 00:55:47,082
I'm pretty sure you
said no to strippers,
1350
00:55:47,084 --> 00:55:49,182
but then I ignored you
and booked a stripper.
1351
00:55:49,184 --> 00:55:52,848
♪ Move that body
next to mine
1352
00:55:52,850 --> 00:55:55,815
♪ Watch out,
I'm coming your way
1353
00:55:55,817 --> 00:55:58,049
Suzy's going to go mad
when she finds out.
1354
00:55:58,051 --> 00:55:59,182
Here's an idea.
1355
00:55:59,184 --> 00:55:59,748
Don't tell her.
1356
00:55:59,750 --> 00:56:00,515
Yeah, don't tell her.
1357
00:56:00,517 --> 00:56:02,617
We tell each other
everything.
1358
00:56:07,684 --> 00:56:09,049
Yeah, I'll probably just
shove that one in the vault.
1359
00:56:09,051 --> 00:56:10,917
- Yeah, yeah.
- Good idea.
1360
00:56:12,051 --> 00:56:15,682
♪ Good times on,
bring the good times on
1361
00:56:15,684 --> 00:56:17,784
♪ Let the good times roll
1362
00:56:19,117 --> 00:56:20,182
Dennis!
1363
00:56:20,184 --> 00:56:23,548
♪ I turned out your body
three times before
1364
00:56:23,550 --> 00:56:24,882
♪ I want to lay it down
1365
00:56:24,884 --> 00:56:27,581
Where are you,
you stupid twat?
1366
00:56:27,583 --> 00:56:31,581
♪ The man in need
you know is what you need
1367
00:56:31,583 --> 00:56:32,715
Dennis!
1368
00:56:32,717 --> 00:56:35,684
♪ I got champaign moves,
every hot girl's dream
1369
00:56:36,617 --> 00:56:37,984
Give me a belt!
1370
00:56:38,617 --> 00:56:40,817
No, no, no.
What you doing?
1371
00:56:42,517 --> 00:56:44,051
I've got one.
1372
00:56:51,184 --> 00:56:54,915
♪ Move that body
next to mine
1373
00:56:54,917 --> 00:56:57,784
♪ Watch out,
I'm coming your way
1374
00:56:58,517 --> 00:56:59,915
You've been naughty!
1375
00:56:59,917 --> 00:57:01,049
Go on, hit him!
1376
00:57:01,051 --> 00:57:02,784
Are you sorry?
1377
00:57:03,151 --> 00:57:05,581
Beat him!
Go on!
1378
00:57:05,583 --> 00:57:07,982
♪ Bring the good times home
1379
00:57:07,984 --> 00:57:10,082
♪ Bring the good times home
1380
00:57:10,084 --> 00:57:13,017
♪ And let the good times roll
1381
00:57:13,951 --> 00:57:15,682
♪ Bring the good times home
1382
00:57:15,684 --> 00:57:16,915
Jenks,
what's happening, mate?
1383
00:57:16,917 --> 00:57:18,151
Sarge.
1384
00:57:18,817 --> 00:57:20,717
You're not gonna
fucking believe this.
1385
00:57:22,284 --> 00:57:24,084
Behave.
1386
00:57:28,217 --> 00:57:29,184
Yes.
1387
00:57:30,917 --> 00:57:32,615
Say you're sorry.
1388
00:57:32,617 --> 00:57:33,682
I'm sorry.
1389
00:57:33,684 --> 00:57:36,015
I didn't hear you!
1390
00:57:36,017 --> 00:57:37,817
I feel humiliated
just watching this.
1391
00:57:42,617 --> 00:57:44,184
I'm lactose intolerant.
1392
00:57:56,184 --> 00:57:57,750
Bravo!
1393
00:58:01,117 --> 00:58:03,082
Right,
ten pounds each please.
1394
00:58:03,084 --> 00:58:05,049
Ah, that's worth
every penny.
1395
00:58:05,051 --> 00:58:06,151
Thank you.
1396
00:58:06,517 --> 00:58:07,915
Thank you.
1397
00:58:07,917 --> 00:58:09,182
Thank you.
1398
00:58:09,184 --> 00:58:10,717
Yes, Cheese.
1399
00:58:13,817 --> 00:58:15,082
There you go,
Diamond.
1400
00:58:15,084 --> 00:58:16,215
Thanks, love.
1401
00:58:16,217 --> 00:58:18,217
No, no, no, no.
Thank you.
1402
00:58:19,217 --> 00:58:21,017
You were awesomeballs.
1403
00:58:22,817 --> 00:58:24,648
You were awesomeballs.
1404
00:58:24,650 --> 00:58:27,583
Awesomeballs.
1405
00:58:28,217 --> 00:58:30,850
Hey, good luck
with the wedding.
1406
00:58:32,051 --> 00:58:35,548
Well, if you gentlemen
will excuse me a moment,
1407
00:58:35,550 --> 00:58:36,850
I'll just...
1408
00:58:39,084 --> 00:58:40,149
Back the fuck up,
1409
00:58:40,151 --> 00:58:41,682
or I'll snap his
fucking neck!
1410
00:58:41,684 --> 00:58:43,049
Wait, wait, wait.
Wait.
1411
00:58:43,051 --> 00:58:43,982
I know what you did.
1412
00:58:43,984 --> 00:58:45,316
- We haven't done anything!
- Don't lie.
1413
00:58:45,318 --> 00:58:47,648
- We don't know what the hell you're talking about.
- Yeah?
1414
00:58:47,650 --> 00:58:49,115
Well he does.
They do.
1415
00:58:49,117 --> 00:58:50,149
What have you done,
Sam?
1416
00:58:50,151 --> 00:58:51,848
I think there's been
a little misunderstanding.
1417
00:58:51,850 --> 00:58:52,949
Misunderstanding?
1418
00:58:52,951 --> 00:58:54,515
You killed Steve
and Dennis!
1419
00:58:54,517 --> 00:58:54,949
You did what?
1420
00:58:54,951 --> 00:58:56,815
Well, I, erm...
1421
00:58:56,817 --> 00:58:58,249
You bloody imbecile!
1422
00:58:58,251 --> 00:59:00,548
No, it wasn't just me,
it was...
1423
00:59:00,550 --> 00:59:01,581
Crazy Crew!
1424
00:59:01,583 --> 00:59:02,682
- Not now.
- Yeah, sorry.
1425
00:59:02,684 --> 00:59:04,815
Look, it wasn't our fault,
okay.
1426
00:59:04,817 --> 00:59:06,049
They attacked us, and...
1427
00:59:06,051 --> 00:59:07,515
That's what they
were supposed to do!
1428
00:59:07,517 --> 00:59:08,581
Whoa, whoa, look,
1429
00:59:08,583 --> 00:59:10,515
I'm sure that if Sam
killed somebody,
1430
00:59:10,517 --> 00:59:11,282
he had a good reason.
1431
00:59:11,284 --> 00:59:13,581
Yeah, cause he...
he's like...
1432
00:59:13,583 --> 00:59:15,684
you know what I mean?
1433
00:59:16,817 --> 00:59:18,149
I don't believe this.
1434
00:59:18,151 --> 00:59:19,882
I didn't even want
to be here.
1435
00:59:19,884 --> 00:59:22,115
But Michelle's all,
"Oh, he's my brother,
1436
00:59:22,117 --> 00:59:23,548
and you have to".
1437
00:59:23,550 --> 00:59:24,882
I told her, "Fuck your
brother, Michelle,
1438
00:59:24,884 --> 00:59:26,182
he's a fucking idiot.
1439
00:59:26,184 --> 00:59:29,217
And his friends,
bunch of fucking idiots, too"!
1440
00:59:30,051 --> 00:59:31,049
I didn't want to spend
the weekend with you
1441
00:59:31,051 --> 00:59:32,882
and I'm certainly not
going to prison for you.
1442
00:59:32,884 --> 00:59:34,082
Whoa,
what you doing?
1443
00:59:34,084 --> 00:59:35,082
What do you think
I'm doing?
1444
00:59:35,084 --> 00:59:35,882
I'm calling the police.
1445
00:59:35,884 --> 00:59:37,949
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
hold on, pal.
1446
00:59:37,951 --> 00:59:40,215
Nobody sends my
best friend to prison.
1447
00:59:40,217 --> 00:59:43,517
He ain't your best friend,
you deluded moron.
1448
00:59:46,684 --> 00:59:48,548
You're a total bastard,
mate!
1449
00:59:48,550 --> 00:59:49,782
- Yeah!
- Yeah,
1450
00:59:49,784 --> 00:59:52,115
yeah, and none of us
even wanted you here!
1451
00:59:52,117 --> 00:59:53,715
- Yeah!
- And I boned Michelle
1452
00:59:53,717 --> 00:59:54,949
whilst you were away
on business,
1453
00:59:54,951 --> 00:59:56,617
so who's the idiot now?
1454
00:59:57,550 --> 00:59:59,548
- Oh, that's my sister!
- Sorry, mate.
1455
00:59:59,550 --> 01:00:02,581
Look, Sergeant Marshall,
if that is your real name.
1456
01:00:02,583 --> 01:00:04,249
I can tell that behind
your slightly psychotic
1457
01:00:04,251 --> 01:00:05,682
and cruel exterior,
1458
01:00:05,684 --> 01:00:07,082
you're a reasonable man.
1459
01:00:07,084 --> 01:00:09,082
I'm sure we can work
something out, hmm?
1460
01:00:09,084 --> 01:00:11,049
How does ten grand sound?
1461
01:00:11,051 --> 01:00:12,249
- Ten grand?
- Twenty.
1462
01:00:12,251 --> 01:00:13,782
- Really?
- I'm going to go as high as thirty, but...
1463
01:00:13,784 --> 01:00:14,815
They're my
fucking friends!
1464
01:00:14,817 --> 01:00:15,815
Look, the police
aren't coming,
1465
01:00:15,817 --> 01:00:16,815
so make us an offer!
1466
01:00:16,817 --> 01:00:17,548
The police?
1467
01:00:17,550 --> 01:00:19,648
No, you don't get it,
do you.
1468
01:00:19,650 --> 01:00:20,949
I'm not a reasonable man,
1469
01:00:20,951 --> 01:00:22,882
and I am psychotic
and cruel.
1470
01:00:22,884 --> 01:00:24,548
But I am nothing compared
1471
01:00:24,550 --> 01:00:26,882
to that ruthless bunch
of cunts out there.
1472
01:00:26,884 --> 01:00:29,282
See, some people join the army
cause they wanna protect
1473
01:00:29,284 --> 01:00:31,815
flabby bags of shit
like you lot.
1474
01:00:31,817 --> 01:00:32,848
But not them.
1475
01:00:32,850 --> 01:00:34,215
No, no, no,
they got in
1476
01:00:34,217 --> 01:00:35,949
cause they crave
a bit of blood
1477
01:00:35,951 --> 01:00:36,882
and a bit of violence.
1478
01:00:36,884 --> 01:00:38,548
And it's the only place
a killer can kill
1479
01:00:38,550 --> 01:00:39,982
and get away with it.
1480
01:00:39,984 --> 01:00:41,815
So when I tell 'em
what you've all done,
1481
01:00:41,817 --> 01:00:43,949
you pussies are going
to fucking wish
1482
01:00:43,951 --> 01:00:45,550
that it was the police
after you.
1483
01:00:49,583 --> 01:00:50,882
Put that phone down
1484
01:00:50,884 --> 01:00:52,215
and let my
father-in-law go
1485
01:00:52,217 --> 01:00:53,848
or you're a dead man!
1486
01:00:53,850 --> 01:00:55,748
You ain't got the
fucking balls, son.
1487
01:00:55,750 --> 01:00:57,815
- You're right, he hasn't.
- I do.
1488
01:00:57,817 --> 01:00:58,815
I swear I'll do it.
1489
01:00:58,817 --> 01:00:59,949
Yeah,
you'll fucking miss.
1490
01:00:59,951 --> 01:01:01,282
Put the knife down, Sam.
1491
01:01:01,284 --> 01:01:02,115
You'll screw it up,
1492
01:01:02,117 --> 01:01:03,049
just like you screw
everything up.
1493
01:01:03,051 --> 01:01:05,748
Jesus, Gerald,
have a little faith in me.
1494
01:01:05,750 --> 01:01:07,548
I have no faith in you.
1495
01:01:07,550 --> 01:01:08,949
None whatsoever.
1496
01:01:08,951 --> 01:01:10,748
What is your
goddam problem?
1497
01:01:10,750 --> 01:01:12,748
All I do,
all I ever have done
1498
01:01:12,750 --> 01:01:15,049
is try to be nice to you,
1499
01:01:15,051 --> 01:01:16,615
try to make you like me.
1500
01:01:16,617 --> 01:01:18,882
But all I do never
seems to be good enough.
1501
01:01:18,884 --> 01:01:19,949
My problem?
1502
01:01:19,951 --> 01:01:21,949
- You want to know what my problem is?
- Yes.
1503
01:01:21,951 --> 01:01:23,581
Besides from the fact
you've killed two people
1504
01:01:23,583 --> 01:01:25,115
and landed us all
in an epic shit-storm
1505
01:01:25,117 --> 01:01:26,848
that's probably
going to kill us?
1506
01:01:26,850 --> 01:01:27,915
Yes.
1507
01:01:27,917 --> 01:01:33,450
You didn't ask permission
to marry my daughter.
1508
01:01:34,850 --> 01:01:36,882
I didn't ask permission?
1509
01:01:36,884 --> 01:01:38,015
I didn't ask permission
1510
01:01:38,017 --> 01:01:40,182
because it's not
nineteen fifty-five.
1511
01:01:40,184 --> 01:01:42,215
It's the way
things are done!
1512
01:01:42,217 --> 01:01:44,581
Right,
I'll prove myself to you.
1513
01:01:44,583 --> 01:01:45,715
Ha!
1514
01:01:45,717 --> 01:01:47,581
This is your last chance,
Marshall.
1515
01:01:47,583 --> 01:01:48,682
Take the shot, Sam!
1516
01:01:48,684 --> 01:01:49,515
Do not take the shot,
1517
01:01:49,517 --> 01:01:51,082
I have the situation
fully in hand.
1518
01:01:51,084 --> 01:01:51,715
Put the phone down!
1519
01:01:51,717 --> 01:01:53,750
- Jenks!
- Do it, Sam!
1520
01:01:59,550 --> 01:02:04,848
You stupid,
cocking fucknugget!
1521
01:02:04,850 --> 01:02:06,717
Jenks, it's the stag do,
it's the...
1522
01:02:09,051 --> 01:02:11,217
Yes, Cheese!
Cheese, yes.
1523
01:02:13,984 --> 01:02:15,581
You alright, Gerry?
1524
01:02:15,583 --> 01:02:16,884
Sarge?
1525
01:02:17,251 --> 01:02:18,583
Sarge?!
1526
01:02:24,984 --> 01:02:28,750
- Yeah, rip your hair out.
- Get it tight.
1527
01:02:33,650 --> 01:02:35,583
Get off me.
1528
01:02:44,550 --> 01:02:45,949
Toby, can you
do anything?
1529
01:02:45,951 --> 01:02:47,115
You know medical stuff.
1530
01:02:47,117 --> 01:02:48,581
Well, if he gets a tumor,
let me know.
1531
01:02:48,583 --> 01:02:49,316
Maybe I can help.
1532
01:02:49,318 --> 01:02:50,715
Yeah,
probably not though, eh?
1533
01:02:50,717 --> 01:02:52,748
Just find something
I can use as a bandage.
1534
01:02:52,750 --> 01:02:53,915
Some pressure.
1535
01:02:53,917 --> 01:02:57,984
Ah, well,
funny you should say that.
1536
01:02:59,550 --> 01:03:01,648
So, what do we do?
1537
01:03:01,650 --> 01:03:03,249
Well, we can't run.
1538
01:03:03,251 --> 01:03:04,882
We could still
call the police.
1539
01:03:04,884 --> 01:03:06,615
You're all fucking
dead anyway.
1540
01:03:06,617 --> 01:03:08,051
Shut him up.
1541
01:03:10,684 --> 01:03:14,650
We stay and we fight.
1542
01:03:16,717 --> 01:03:19,949
I was in a similar situation
back in Afghanistan.
1543
01:03:19,951 --> 01:03:23,115
In the mountains
of the Hindu Kush.
1544
01:03:23,117 --> 01:03:25,848
Four men on a capture
or kill mission
1545
01:03:25,850 --> 01:03:28,049
for a warlord
responsible for the deaths
1546
01:03:28,051 --> 01:03:30,717
of fifty British soldiers.
1547
01:03:31,884 --> 01:03:33,982
But everything
went F.U.B.A.R
1548
01:03:33,984 --> 01:03:36,617
when we chose to spare
a group of goat herders.
1549
01:03:37,784 --> 01:03:39,648
Our mercy was betrayed.
1550
01:03:39,650 --> 01:03:41,115
Before we knew it,
1551
01:03:41,117 --> 01:03:44,548
we were surrounded
by a legion of Taliban,
1552
01:03:44,550 --> 01:03:46,782
baying for our blood.
1553
01:03:46,784 --> 01:03:49,517
The odds insurmountable.
1554
01:03:49,884 --> 01:03:52,517
The enemy fearless.
1555
01:03:54,184 --> 01:03:57,282
But we banded together.
1556
01:03:57,284 --> 01:03:59,782
Stood firm.
1557
01:03:59,784 --> 01:04:04,182
And together we defeated
those savages
1558
01:04:04,184 --> 01:04:06,782
and made it through.
1559
01:04:06,784 --> 01:04:07,882
Okay.
1560
01:04:07,884 --> 01:04:12,715
Am I seriously the only one
not buying that? Hmm?
1561
01:04:12,717 --> 01:04:14,848
That's the plot
of Lone Survivor.
1562
01:04:14,850 --> 01:04:16,249
I'm sorry, I really didn't
want to have to do this,
1563
01:04:16,251 --> 01:04:17,982
but seeing as our lives
depend on it,
1564
01:04:17,984 --> 01:04:20,548
Gerald,
you're full of shit, mate.
1565
01:04:20,550 --> 01:04:22,115
You were never
in the army.
1566
01:04:22,117 --> 01:04:24,949
Or if you were you were
some kind of potato peeler.
1567
01:04:24,951 --> 01:04:25,648
How dare you.
1568
01:04:25,650 --> 01:04:27,249
For the love of God,
Myles,
1569
01:04:27,251 --> 01:04:30,581
Gerald has already told you
he was in the Navy.
1570
01:04:30,583 --> 01:04:31,915
That's right, Sam.
1571
01:04:31,917 --> 01:04:34,748
The S.B.S.
1572
01:04:34,750 --> 01:04:36,815
The Special Boat Service.
1573
01:04:36,817 --> 01:04:38,848
The navy's team
of crack commandos
1574
01:04:38,850 --> 01:04:41,548
used only
in the most dangerous
1575
01:04:41,550 --> 01:04:43,115
and perilous of missions.
1576
01:04:43,117 --> 01:04:45,848
Fine, whatever.
1577
01:04:45,850 --> 01:04:46,848
Carry on.
1578
01:04:46,850 --> 01:04:48,483
Okay chaps.
1579
01:04:49,583 --> 01:04:51,450
Here's how we do this.
1580
01:04:52,650 --> 01:04:55,848
Now, the enemy
may have skills.
1581
01:04:55,850 --> 01:04:56,984
Resources.
1582
01:04:57,684 --> 01:04:59,583
Come on lads,
let's get tooled up.
1583
01:05:04,284 --> 01:05:06,082
We may be wounded.
1584
01:05:06,084 --> 01:05:07,715
Drunk.
1585
01:05:07,717 --> 01:05:08,917
Stoned.
1586
01:05:09,251 --> 01:05:11,084
But we have something
they don't.
1587
01:05:14,051 --> 01:05:16,450
Indefatigable spirit.
1588
01:05:18,750 --> 01:05:20,284
Limitless courage.
1589
01:05:24,151 --> 01:05:26,951
The unbreakable
will to live.
1590
01:05:28,217 --> 01:05:31,115
As we say in the S.B.S.
1591
01:05:31,117 --> 01:05:34,117
By strength or guile.
1592
01:05:37,984 --> 01:05:40,282
By strength or guile!
1593
01:05:40,284 --> 01:05:41,517
Yeah!
1594
01:05:42,684 --> 01:05:44,084
Come on, boys!
1595
01:05:54,151 --> 01:06:00,149
Amazing grace,
1596
01:06:00,151 --> 01:06:05,949
how sweet the sound,
1597
01:06:05,951 --> 01:06:15,249
that saved
a wretch like me.
1598
01:06:15,251 --> 01:06:18,017
I...
1599
01:06:26,084 --> 01:06:27,648
We've had some good
times together though,
1600
01:06:27,650 --> 01:06:29,017
haven't we?
1601
01:06:29,750 --> 01:06:30,882
Yeah.
1602
01:06:30,884 --> 01:06:32,615
We have.
1603
01:06:32,617 --> 01:06:33,882
Still,
1604
01:06:33,884 --> 01:06:36,515
I think this weekend
might be the best yet.
1605
01:06:36,517 --> 01:06:38,049
What do you reckon?
1606
01:06:38,051 --> 01:06:39,115
No.
1607
01:06:39,117 --> 01:06:42,848
Guys, if we get
through this okay,
1608
01:06:42,850 --> 01:06:44,015
do you reckon I could
become a member
1609
01:06:44,017 --> 01:06:45,615
of the Crazy Crew?
1610
01:06:45,617 --> 01:06:46,682
I'll tell you what,
1611
01:06:46,684 --> 01:06:48,915
the way you smacked
Brandon in the dick earlier,
1612
01:06:48,917 --> 01:06:50,548
you're already
a member, mate.
1613
01:06:50,550 --> 01:06:53,648
- Yeah.
- Ah, this is so sweet!
1614
01:06:53,650 --> 01:06:55,682
But how about you
all shut the fuck up?
1615
01:06:55,684 --> 01:06:57,615
I don't want the last thing
I hear to be you twats
1616
01:06:57,617 --> 01:06:59,715
twittering on about,
"Good times."
1617
01:06:59,717 --> 01:07:01,548
You've had some good
times with Michelle though,
1618
01:07:01,550 --> 01:07:02,882
haven't you Myles, eh?
1619
01:07:02,884 --> 01:07:04,149
You wankers.
1620
01:07:04,151 --> 01:07:07,483
Oh, she's still
my bloody sister!
1621
01:07:12,151 --> 01:07:15,015
Once more unto the breach,
dear friends,
1622
01:07:15,017 --> 01:07:15,882
once more.
1623
01:07:15,884 --> 01:07:18,748
Looks like it's
negotiation time, boys.
1624
01:07:18,750 --> 01:07:20,917
These guys don't know
what's about to hit them.
1625
01:07:21,784 --> 01:07:23,017
Hey!
1626
01:07:23,650 --> 01:07:25,082
Fellas!
1627
01:07:25,084 --> 01:07:27,015
Listen to me.
1628
01:07:27,017 --> 01:07:29,149
We have your boss
captive here,
1629
01:07:29,151 --> 01:07:30,082
and he's at our mercy.
1630
01:07:30,084 --> 01:07:33,748
But, I'm going to
make you a simple offer,
1631
01:07:33,750 --> 01:07:36,648
you let us go
and we let him go.
1632
01:07:36,650 --> 01:07:38,748
Everyone's safe,
everyone's happy.
1633
01:07:38,750 --> 01:07:40,049
What are you saying?
1634
01:07:40,051 --> 01:07:42,817
- Fuck Marshall, he's a twat!
- Okay.
1635
01:07:51,717 --> 01:07:53,782
What the hell
are you laughing at?
1636
01:07:53,784 --> 01:07:55,949
Now, you tell 'em to let us go,
or you're a dead man!
1637
01:07:55,951 --> 01:07:58,515
Oh, go fuck yourself!
1638
01:07:58,517 --> 01:07:59,581
You know what, mate,
1639
01:07:59,583 --> 01:08:01,748
I'm going to enjoy watching
them skin you alive.
1640
01:08:01,750 --> 01:08:03,015
Hello!
1641
01:08:03,017 --> 01:08:05,617
Brandon,
what you doing?
1642
01:08:05,850 --> 01:08:09,882
Hey, you out there,
hello!
1643
01:08:09,884 --> 01:08:12,784
Look, I'm not really
with these people.
1644
01:08:13,951 --> 01:08:15,748
I actually
kind of hate them.
1645
01:08:15,750 --> 01:08:18,748
I wasn't involved in killing
any of your friends,
1646
01:08:18,750 --> 01:08:20,015
and the only reason
why I'm here at all
1647
01:08:20,017 --> 01:08:21,951
is because my wife
forced me.
1648
01:08:22,251 --> 01:08:25,915
So, I was just wondering if,
maybe you'd let me go?
1649
01:08:25,917 --> 01:08:27,850
Or, or, or...
1650
01:08:28,550 --> 01:08:30,015
if it's alright with you,
1651
01:08:30,017 --> 01:08:31,982
I will happily
join your side.
1652
01:08:31,984 --> 01:08:33,848
- You absolute...
- Cocksucker!
1653
01:08:33,850 --> 01:08:34,949
Screw you all!
1654
01:08:34,951 --> 01:08:36,848
Which one are you?
1655
01:08:36,850 --> 01:08:39,149
My name's Brandon.
1656
01:08:39,151 --> 01:08:42,617
Six foot three,
dark blonde hair.
1657
01:08:46,151 --> 01:08:47,515
I'm the good looking one.
1658
01:08:47,517 --> 01:08:48,515
Well...
1659
01:08:48,517 --> 01:08:51,182
I don't remember you.
Show us your face.
1660
01:08:51,184 --> 01:08:52,750
Look, Brandon,
don't do it!
1661
01:08:56,750 --> 01:08:58,717
Okay.
Here I come.
1662
01:09:02,284 --> 01:09:04,282
Fuuuck!
1663
01:09:04,284 --> 01:09:06,015
Quick, let's go!
1664
01:09:06,017 --> 01:09:07,015
Go, go, go, go!
1665
01:09:07,017 --> 01:09:09,517
You're all fucking dead,
you load of piss ants!
1666
01:09:13,251 --> 01:09:14,949
Barricade the door!
1667
01:09:14,951 --> 01:09:16,151
Get it!
1668
01:09:16,917 --> 01:09:18,550
Here's my boys.
1669
01:09:19,817 --> 01:09:20,884
Get 'em, lads.
1670
01:09:22,884 --> 01:09:24,117
Ah!
1671
01:09:45,517 --> 01:09:46,884
Shit!
1672
01:09:47,117 --> 01:09:48,750
You've been bitten!
1673
01:09:52,684 --> 01:09:54,784
Oh, flipping heck!
1674
01:09:57,550 --> 01:09:59,117
I love you guys.
1675
01:10:00,884 --> 01:10:02,282
Al, what are you doing?
1676
01:10:02,284 --> 01:10:03,882
They're not real zombies!
1677
01:10:03,884 --> 01:10:05,548
For fuck's sake!
1678
01:10:05,550 --> 01:10:06,684
Good point.
1679
01:10:19,051 --> 01:10:21,450
Crazy Crew!
1680
01:10:25,084 --> 01:10:27,882
Go, go on,
get out of here!
1681
01:10:27,884 --> 01:10:29,648
Save yourselves!
1682
01:10:29,650 --> 01:10:31,617
Get that, come on.
1683
01:10:31,817 --> 01:10:33,782
Come on, come on,
1684
01:10:33,784 --> 01:10:35,617
come on, come on.
1685
01:10:36,984 --> 01:10:39,117
This way, this way,
come on, come on.
1686
01:10:52,850 --> 01:10:54,581
This has got to be
the way out.
1687
01:10:54,583 --> 01:10:56,149
Hold on.
Where's Cheese?
1688
01:10:56,151 --> 01:10:58,182
Cheese!
Cheese!
1689
01:10:58,184 --> 01:10:59,815
Come on, Gerald,
we've got to go.
1690
01:10:59,817 --> 01:11:01,815
I am not leaving
without Cheese.
1691
01:11:01,817 --> 01:11:03,115
Go,
1692
01:11:03,117 --> 01:11:04,848
get him out of here,
get the car.
1693
01:11:04,850 --> 01:11:05,882
I'll go back
for the others.
1694
01:11:05,884 --> 01:11:07,049
Right,
come on, Gerald,
1695
01:11:07,051 --> 01:11:07,982
come on.
1696
01:11:07,984 --> 01:11:08,850
Stay with me.
1697
01:11:28,184 --> 01:11:29,483
Praise Jah!
1698
01:11:38,984 --> 01:11:39,748
Which way?
1699
01:11:39,750 --> 01:11:40,416
Erm, it says
North is this way,
1700
01:11:40,418 --> 01:11:41,982
but I have
no fucking clue.
1701
01:11:41,984 --> 01:11:42,984
No.
1702
01:11:43,251 --> 01:11:44,717
This way, this way.
1703
01:11:45,684 --> 01:11:47,249
The man would take
a bullet for you
1704
01:11:47,251 --> 01:11:48,815
and you're leaving him
behind to die!
1705
01:11:48,817 --> 01:11:50,115
We'll come back for him.
1706
01:11:50,117 --> 01:11:52,450
Ha!
Spoken like a true coward.
1707
01:12:04,117 --> 01:12:05,982
This place is well creepy,
man.
1708
01:12:05,984 --> 01:12:07,517
Yeah.
1709
01:12:19,550 --> 01:12:21,483
Fucking hell.
1710
01:12:22,817 --> 01:12:25,850
Sorry.
I thought it was a...
1711
01:12:30,251 --> 01:12:31,583
Hello boys.
1712
01:13:24,251 --> 01:13:26,015
What's the matter,
you city boy prick?
1713
01:13:26,017 --> 01:13:28,182
You haven't got anything
smart to say now, have you?
1714
01:13:28,184 --> 01:13:29,217
Well...
1715
01:13:30,684 --> 01:13:31,850
What was that?
1716
01:13:58,684 --> 01:14:00,017
Er...
1717
01:14:35,650 --> 01:14:37,017
That one's for Steve.
1718
01:14:38,884 --> 01:14:39,951
This one...
1719
01:14:50,017 --> 01:14:51,517
You fucker!
1720
01:15:08,650 --> 01:15:10,151
This ain't no fun
no more.
1721
01:15:12,984 --> 01:15:15,750
Guess it's time to shut your
big mouth once and for all.
1722
01:15:36,617 --> 01:15:38,151
Oh shit.
1723
01:15:38,784 --> 01:15:40,617
Game over,
fat boy.
1724
01:15:49,284 --> 01:15:51,084
You came back for us.
1725
01:15:51,684 --> 01:15:53,215
I never left.
1726
01:15:53,217 --> 01:15:54,815
I thought
you guys had all...
1727
01:15:54,817 --> 01:15:56,617
I meant metaphorically.
1728
01:15:59,117 --> 01:16:00,717
Guys!
1729
01:16:01,117 --> 01:16:02,882
Can you help me out here?
1730
01:16:02,884 --> 01:16:05,217
I think he's
broken my jaw.
1731
01:16:09,117 --> 01:16:10,750
Right.
1732
01:16:11,051 --> 01:16:13,151
- Let's go get our boy.
- Yeah.
1733
01:16:16,750 --> 01:16:18,682
Come on!
1734
01:16:18,684 --> 01:16:20,615
- God.
- Come on.
1735
01:16:20,617 --> 01:16:23,650
Dirty fucking shit balls!
1736
01:16:24,817 --> 01:16:27,084
Do you know
anything about cars?
1737
01:16:28,550 --> 01:16:30,550
Oh for fuck...
1738
01:16:37,017 --> 01:16:41,017
Word on the street
is you used to be S.B.S.
1739
01:16:41,951 --> 01:16:45,049
I met some of your boys
outside Kandahar.
1740
01:16:45,051 --> 01:16:47,951
Right bunch
of stuck up twats.
1741
01:16:48,151 --> 01:16:50,784
Thought they were fucking
better than the rest of us.
1742
01:16:54,784 --> 01:16:56,748
What is this?
1743
01:16:56,750 --> 01:16:58,615
Two men go in.
1744
01:16:58,617 --> 01:17:00,548
One man comes out.
1745
01:17:00,550 --> 01:17:02,249
Now,
I'll give you my word
1746
01:17:02,251 --> 01:17:04,550
that if your man wins,
1747
01:17:04,984 --> 01:17:06,984
I'll let you both go.
1748
01:17:09,517 --> 01:17:11,648
If I win,
1749
01:17:11,650 --> 01:17:15,450
I'm gonna gut you
like a fucking fish.
1750
01:17:17,184 --> 01:17:18,884
In you go.
Come on.
1751
01:17:19,650 --> 01:17:20,548
Time for you to find out
1752
01:17:20,550 --> 01:17:22,617
if you're as good
as you say you are.
1753
01:17:24,117 --> 01:17:26,149
The thing is,
1754
01:17:26,151 --> 01:17:31,084
you may have noticed
that I'm W.I.A.,
1755
01:17:33,117 --> 01:17:34,184
so it's hardly a fair...
1756
01:17:42,617 --> 01:17:44,084
Now it's fair.
1757
01:17:46,850 --> 01:17:48,017
Do 'im, Jenks.
1758
01:17:52,017 --> 01:17:53,915
Okay.
1759
01:17:53,917 --> 01:17:54,850
Thing is...
1760
01:17:59,550 --> 01:18:01,051
Look...
1761
01:18:04,750 --> 01:18:06,617
Come on, Gerald.
1762
01:18:13,284 --> 01:18:15,782
Right.
1763
01:18:15,784 --> 01:18:17,817
You asked for it.
1764
01:19:01,617 --> 01:19:03,184
S.B.S., my arse.
1765
01:19:06,984 --> 01:19:10,517
By strength or guile.
1766
01:19:21,850 --> 01:19:24,051
This is too fucking easy,
Sarge.
1767
01:19:24,984 --> 01:19:27,017
Might as well let 'em go,
eh?
1768
01:19:33,984 --> 01:19:35,084
Finish him.
1769
01:19:38,117 --> 01:19:39,884
Yah!
1770
01:19:43,784 --> 01:19:45,984
You fucking cunt.
1771
01:19:52,583 --> 01:19:53,982
No mate...
1772
01:19:53,984 --> 01:19:56,550
No, no, no,
I'm only a...
1773
01:20:18,617 --> 01:20:19,984
Mr. Chappell,
1774
01:20:21,084 --> 01:20:22,915
I was just wondering,
1775
01:20:22,917 --> 01:20:24,782
if I might have
your permission
1776
01:20:24,784 --> 01:20:27,084
to marry your
wonderful daughter.
1777
01:20:33,184 --> 01:20:36,650
Permission granted.
1778
01:20:57,517 --> 01:20:59,282
That was one large
fucking night.
1779
01:20:59,284 --> 01:21:00,782
Mm-hmm.
1780
01:21:00,784 --> 01:21:03,015
Large indeed,
Cheese.
1781
01:21:03,017 --> 01:21:05,418
Large indeed.
1782
01:21:05,884 --> 01:21:07,548
Tell you what,
if nothing else,
1783
01:21:07,550 --> 01:21:08,915
this makes writing
your wedding speech
1784
01:21:08,917 --> 01:21:10,848
a whole lot easier.
1785
01:21:10,850 --> 01:21:13,182
Unfortunately,
I think it might be while
1786
01:21:13,184 --> 01:21:15,650
before you get to make
that speech, mate.
1787
01:21:16,284 --> 01:21:17,882
Maybe twenty to life?
1788
01:21:17,884 --> 01:21:19,182
Guys,
1789
01:21:19,184 --> 01:21:21,015
nobody's going to prison.
1790
01:21:21,017 --> 01:21:22,215
Trust me.
1791
01:21:22,217 --> 01:21:23,548
Myles has a plan
1792
01:21:23,550 --> 01:21:25,182
that's going to make
all of this
1793
01:21:25,184 --> 01:21:27,117
just go away.
1794
01:21:31,684 --> 01:21:32,917
Fuck me.
1795
01:21:35,917 --> 01:21:37,648
♪ Oh yeah, we gonna die
1796
01:21:37,650 --> 01:21:39,717
♪ Crazy crazy house
1797
01:21:40,617 --> 01:21:44,115
♪ It's the Crazy Crew
and we put it down
1798
01:21:44,117 --> 01:21:47,182
♪ Who got your back,
it's the Crazy Crew
1799
01:21:47,184 --> 01:21:48,682
♪ Who you gonna die
1800
01:21:48,684 --> 01:21:49,815
♪ I'm like the rough
and the rugged
1801
01:21:49,817 --> 01:21:51,049
♪ When I start wreck
1802
01:21:51,051 --> 01:21:53,515
♪ Run when I come,
chumps hit the deck
1803
01:21:53,517 --> 01:21:56,015
♪ Hit 'em with a little bit
of combat round
1804
01:21:56,017 --> 01:21:58,450
♪ Leave the bodies
buried in the ground
1805
01:21:59,084 --> 01:22:00,682
♪ Now look what
you gone and done
1806
01:22:00,684 --> 01:22:02,949
♪ Now you wus
gotta fool with a gun
1807
01:22:02,951 --> 01:22:04,949
♪ It's a giggle
just a little bit of fun
1808
01:22:04,951 --> 01:22:07,215
♪ It makes a lot of sense
if you've got none
1809
01:22:07,217 --> 01:22:10,082
♪ On the run with a gun
now whatcha gonna do
1810
01:22:10,084 --> 01:22:11,815
♪ It makes sense
if you've got one
1811
01:22:11,817 --> 01:22:14,782
♪ It's the Crazy Crew
yeah that's no good
1812
01:22:14,784 --> 01:22:16,782
♪ It makes sense
if you've got none
1813
01:22:16,784 --> 01:22:19,550
♪ Blop-a ba blop
It's the Crazy Crew
1814
01:22:19,917 --> 01:22:21,015
♪ What ya gonna do
1815
01:22:21,017 --> 01:22:24,515
♪ Who's got your back
it's the Crazy Crew
1816
01:22:24,517 --> 01:22:25,682
♪ Who you gonna die
1817
01:22:25,684 --> 01:22:28,115
♪ I'm like Cool Hand Luke
when I sight the scope
1818
01:22:28,117 --> 01:22:30,548
♪ Fun when they run
yell ho, Konco
1819
01:22:30,550 --> 01:22:32,782
♪ Cracker with a bat
watch your man get flat
1820
01:22:32,784 --> 01:22:34,548
♪ Hey Crazy Crew
where you at
1821
01:22:34,550 --> 01:22:35,682
♪ Yo where you at
1822
01:22:35,684 --> 01:22:37,548
♪ Hit 'em with the bone
Hit 'em home ricochet
1823
01:22:37,550 --> 01:22:39,815
♪ Carnivore cannibal,
cold cabaret
1824
01:22:39,817 --> 01:22:42,082
♪ Roll with the drums
in cold when it comes in
1825
01:22:42,084 --> 01:22:44,217
♪ Rolling through
your dark always
1826
01:22:45,217 --> 01:22:46,949
♪ Well bloody hoo-ha
1827
01:22:46,951 --> 01:22:49,082
♪ One felt everything
gone F.U.B.A.R
1828
01:22:49,084 --> 01:22:51,548
♪ Hit it with the bow
with the homegrown sweat
1829
01:22:51,550 --> 01:22:53,882
♪ Couldn't even fu...
with my mic check
1830
01:22:53,884 --> 01:22:56,249
♪ Hit 'em up
mic-microphone check-a
1831
01:22:56,251 --> 01:22:58,215
♪ Mic mic check
one two
1832
01:22:58,217 --> 01:23:00,982
♪ Get a mic
mic-microphone check-a
1833
01:23:00,984 --> 01:23:03,084
♪ Mic mic check
one two
1834
01:23:03,917 --> 01:23:05,817
♪ Now whatcha gonna do
1835
01:23:07,850 --> 01:23:10,282
♪ Crazy Crew
Who you gonna die
1836
01:23:10,284 --> 01:23:12,483
♪ Crazy Crew in the house
1837
01:23:13,117 --> 01:23:15,015
♪ Well bloody hoo-ha
1838
01:23:15,017 --> 01:23:16,951
♪ It's a giggle
just a little bit of fun
1839
01:23:17,784 --> 01:23:19,249
♪ Everything gone F.U.B.A.R
1840
01:23:19,251 --> 01:23:21,648
♪ Makes a lot of sense
if you've got none
1841
01:23:21,650 --> 01:23:23,815
♪ You've boys just
ain't got no sense
1842
01:23:23,817 --> 01:23:26,082
♪ Rap tak ticka
ain't worth ten pents
1843
01:23:26,084 --> 01:23:28,282
♪ Little tip toe
get your foot step show
1844
01:23:28,284 --> 01:23:30,782
♪ On top of that
you're fu... slow
1845
01:23:30,784 --> 01:23:33,082
♪ I'm about dropping off
bombs on a little bit
1846
01:23:33,084 --> 01:23:35,515
♪ Hold on a little pink tongue
in the middle bit
1847
01:23:35,517 --> 01:23:37,815
♪ Boys get lifted high
like Snoop
1848
01:23:37,817 --> 01:23:40,548
♪ Drop heavy like
wonton soup
1849
01:23:40,550 --> 01:23:44,617
♪ Drop heavy like,
like what like wonton soup
1850
01:23:45,017 --> 01:23:49,017
♪ Drop, drop heavy like,
like what like wonton soup
1851
01:23:50,151 --> 01:23:52,084
♪ Now whatcha gonna do
1852
01:23:53,984 --> 01:23:56,548
♪ Crazy Crew that's no good
1853
01:23:56,550 --> 01:23:58,583
♪ Crazy Crew in the house
1854
01:23:59,684 --> 01:24:01,715
♪ What a bloody hoo-ha
1855
01:24:01,717 --> 01:24:03,951
♪ Makes a lot of sense
if you've got none
1856
01:24:05,951 --> 01:24:08,117
♪ It's a giggle
just a little bit of fun
1857
01:24:11,051 --> 01:24:13,249
♪ What a bloody hoo-ha
1858
01:24:13,251 --> 01:24:15,748
♪ Everything gone F.U.B.A.R
1859
01:24:15,750 --> 01:24:17,650
♪ Just a little bit of fun
1860
01:24:18,084 --> 01:24:19,917
♪ Who you gonna die
1861
01:24:20,850 --> 01:24:22,117
♪ Crazy Crew
1862
01:24:23,117 --> 01:24:24,817
♪ Best know who
1863
01:24:27,151 --> 01:24:29,117
♪ Everything gone F.U.B.A.R ♪
1864
01:24:29,119 --> 01:24:34,119
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