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1
00:00:07,966 --> 00:00:09,796
[sweeping orchestral music]
2
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:12,223
- California is my home,
3
00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:15,642
from the majestic slopes
of Lake Tahoe
4
00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:18,442
to the less cool slopes
of Big Bear
5
00:00:18,476 --> 00:00:20,596
to the awesome beaches
of Malibu.
6
00:00:20,645 --> 00:00:22,305
I love it here,
7
00:00:22,355 --> 00:00:23,975
and I have served
this beautiful state
8
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,364
for the past three years.
9
00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:26,990
- Hey, Governor Zack.
10
00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:28,447
You saved my life out there!
11
00:00:28,486 --> 00:00:31,236
And those tax cuts really
resuscitated my bank account.
12
00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:32,621
How can I ever repay you?
13
00:00:32,657 --> 00:00:35,117
- No need.
Just doing my job.
14
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:37,910
California
is where my story began.
15
00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:39,374
I grew up in the Palisades.
16
00:00:39,414 --> 00:00:41,424
I married my high school
sweetheart, Kelly
17
00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:43,668
and became a successful
trial attorney
18
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:46,300
who always fought
for what was cool.
19
00:00:46,338 --> 00:00:48,588
My calling to politics
came later.
20
00:00:48,631 --> 00:00:50,471
As part of a scheme
to get out of paying
21
00:00:50,508 --> 00:00:52,338
a $75 parking ticket,
22
00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:55,715
I decided to run for governor,
and I won!
23
00:00:55,764 --> 00:00:57,644
But it hasn't always
been easy.
24
00:00:57,682 --> 00:00:59,642
I've had to make
some tough decisions--
25
00:00:59,684 --> 00:01:01,564
decisions that have kept me
26
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:05,073
and my still smokin' hot wife,
Kelly, awake at night.
27
00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:06,436
- As governor, my husband
28
00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,983
had to cut $10 billion
29
00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:09,276
in education spending.
30
00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:10,739
And yes, that led to
31
00:01:10,779 --> 00:01:11,949
some school closures.
32
00:01:11,988 --> 00:01:12,988
But it also led to
33
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:13,991
reduced loan rates
34
00:01:14,032 --> 00:01:15,332
for small businesses
35
00:01:15,367 --> 00:01:16,577
and a bailout
36
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:17,988
for the fossil fuel industry.
37
00:01:18,036 --> 00:01:19,826
And as a busy mom,
38
00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:22,001
that's important to me.
39
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,790
Wait, Zack, I can't say that.
40
00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:26,343
- But I believe
in public education.
41
00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:28,758
Kelly and I both attended
Bayside High,
42
00:01:28,797 --> 00:01:31,467
and we sent our son,
Mac Morris, there as well.
43
00:01:31,508 --> 00:01:34,258
School should be
an awesome experience,
44
00:01:34,302 --> 00:01:36,812
a time for kids
to evade math homework
45
00:01:36,846 --> 00:01:40,176
and torment their principal
with no consequences.
46
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:42,685
That's what I had
and what I'm fighting for
47
00:01:42,727 --> 00:01:45,057
for every student
in California.
48
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:47,395
We will figure this out
together.
49
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,860
I'm Governor Zack,
and I approve this message.
50
00:01:50,902 --> 00:01:53,822
[triumphant end chords]
- Hey! I figured it out.
51
00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:56,323
How about give us
the $10 billion back?
52
00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:57,486
- It's wild, Aisha.
53
00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:58,794
It's like he doesn't get
how crappy
54
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:00,407
half the schools
in California are.
55
00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:02,003
What world is he living in?
56
00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:05,168
[lively synth rock]
57
00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,418
- Ah, Bayside.
58
00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:11,554
Hey, girls, you wanna
go skinny dipping tonight?
59
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:13,379
I just flooded the gym.
[girls chuckle]
60
00:02:13,425 --> 00:02:15,635
Now, that's what I call
a double date.
61
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:17,757
- Hey, Mac!
- Hey, Jamie!
62
00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:19,474
You ready for the big game
against Valley this weekend?
63
00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:21,184
- I wish.
Coach says I have to
64
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,064
pass my geography test,
or I can't play.
65
00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,351
- Why is your book
upside-down?
66
00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:25,904
- I'm reading about
Australia.
67
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:28,187
- [sighs]
You think you got problems?
68
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,031
I accidentally planned
my birthday party
69
00:02:30,066 --> 00:02:33,646
on the same night as
my parents' anniversary party.
70
00:02:33,695 --> 00:02:34,985
- Okay, Lexi, hundred bucks
71
00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:37,200
says you can't make them
divorce before Saturday.
72
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,580
- Oh, you're on, Preppy.
73
00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:40,326
[school bell rings]
- Oh. Well.
74
00:02:40,368 --> 00:02:41,328
Time to go to class.
75
00:02:41,369 --> 00:02:42,829
- Ugh. Don't remind me.
76
00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,711
We're climbing the rope
in gym today.
77
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,878
- Oh, I wouldn't be so sure
about that.
78
00:02:46,916 --> 00:02:48,286
[Toddman panting]
79
00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:50,415
- Mac Morris,
did you flood the gym again?
80
00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:52,592
The volleyball team
floated away!
81
00:02:52,630 --> 00:02:54,970
Linda, call the Coast Guard!
[all laugh]
82
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:57,508
- Sorry, Principal Toddman!
83
00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:00,062
Man, I love this school!
84
00:03:00,096 --> 00:03:01,766
[school bell rings]
85
00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:03,386
- * When I wake up
in the mornin' *
86
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:04,933
* Alarm gives out a warnin' *
87
00:03:04,976 --> 00:03:07,016
* I don't think
I'll ever make it on time *
88
00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:08,062
[school bell ringing]
89
00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:09,444
* By the time I
grab my books *
90
00:03:09,481 --> 00:03:10,771
* And I give myself a look *
91
00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:14,485
* I'm at the corner
just in time *
92
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:16,737
* It's all right,
it's all right *
93
00:03:16,780 --> 00:03:18,740
* Saved by the bell,
it's all right *
94
00:03:18,782 --> 00:03:21,372
* It's all right,
saved by the bell *
95
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:23,869
* It's all right *
96
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:28,082
* 'Cause I'm saved
by the bell *
97
00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:30,094
[school bell ringing]
98
00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:32,916
[soft percussive music]
99
00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:35,512
- Good morning,
teachers and students.
100
00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:38,965
I know Douglas High
isn't perfect.
101
00:03:39,844 --> 00:03:42,144
The truth is,
this place was struggling
102
00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:44,560
even before the governor's
latest budget cuts.
103
00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,349
But I love this school,
104
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:47,773
and I know I can make it
105
00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:49,101
a better place.
- * Pick it up *
106
00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:51,475
* Pick it up, pick it up,
pick it up *
107
00:03:51,523 --> 00:03:53,483
* Pick it up, pick it up *
-Mm.
108
00:03:53,525 --> 00:03:54,605
I'm sorry, can you
109
00:03:54,651 --> 00:03:56,031
turn that off, please?
110
00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:57,649
- No problem.
111
00:03:57,696 --> 00:03:59,906
[ringtone stops]
Hello?
112
00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:00,908
No, yeah, I can talk.
113
00:04:00,949 --> 00:04:02,449
What up, man?
114
00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,542
- Um, that's why I'm running
115
00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,577
for this year's
Sophomore Class President.
116
00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,791
'Cause it's not too late
for Douglas High.
117
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,792
It's not too late
for any of us--
118
00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:11,754
- Sorry, kids!
119
00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,963
School's shut down.
- What?
120
00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:15,264
- Wow, they shutting down
the school.
121
00:04:15,296 --> 00:04:16,626
- Yeah, unfortunately,
this isn't
122
00:04:16,673 --> 00:04:18,633
a high school anymore.
123
00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:20,675
I mean, the state
will probably rent it out
124
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:22,469
so that TV shows about
125
00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,262
high schools can shoot here,
126
00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:25,965
but it's not an actual
127
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,976
high school anymore.
128
00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:29,188
Uh, no need to panic.
129
00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:30,307
You can learn everything
130
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,733
you need on the internet.
131
00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:33,521
Take it all.
- No--
132
00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:34,935
- Watch your step.
[overlapping chatter]
133
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:36,573
- Governor Zack!
- Governor Zack!
134
00:04:36,609 --> 00:04:38,399
- Uh, hey.
[chuckles] What's up?
135
00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:40,105
- You have provided no plan
for the students
136
00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:42,525
affected by
your disastrous education cuts.
137
00:04:42,574 --> 00:04:43,664
- Mm-hmm, that is
138
00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:44,990
a great point--thank you.
139
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,115
- Where do you propose
these students go?
140
00:04:47,162 --> 00:04:49,542
To other underfunded schools
that don't have the resources
141
00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:51,121
to handle the kids
they already have?
142
00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,836
- Look, I didn't want to
close the schools.
143
00:04:53,877 --> 00:04:55,837
I feel terrible for these kids!
144
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:58,509
To be honest, I needed
to balance the budget.
145
00:04:58,548 --> 00:04:59,628
I didn't know how.
146
00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:01,264
I just Googled
what they did last year,
147
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,681
and I did it again!
148
00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:04,469
[laughs]
Come on, like, none of you guys
149
00:05:04,512 --> 00:05:06,812
have made
a $10 billion mistake before?
150
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:08,848
all: Boo!
- Ah, guys, guys,
151
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:10,692
come on, come on,
I know I can fix this.
152
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:12,347
I believe in public education.
153
00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:13,765
I went to public school.
154
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:16,153
My son is a student
at Bayside High,
155
00:05:16,191 --> 00:05:17,781
and just the other night,
when I was tucking him in,
156
00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,687
he asked me, "Papa, why--"
157
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:21,816
- Maybe they should go there.
- Hmm?
158
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,703
- Maybe the students
whose schools you closed
159
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:25,530
should be sent to schools
in high property tax areas
160
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:27,075
like Bayside.
161
00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:28,448
- [laughs]
Well.
162
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,205
It's a little more complicated
than that.
163
00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:31,366
- That's actually a great idea.
164
00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:32,794
- Is it?
- Sounds really fair.
165
00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,252
Maybe you should
be the governor!
166
00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:35,712
- Me? Yeah, right.
167
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:36,962
- I don't think
he should be governor.
168
00:05:37,003 --> 00:05:38,883
- I mean, I was
a political science major.
169
00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,592
- Yeah, okay, okay, hey.
Yes, that is a good plan.
170
00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:45,553
So I promise that all students
affected by the shutdown
171
00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:48,465
will be sent to schools
in well-funded districts,
172
00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:50,475
including Bayside!
173
00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:51,937
- There you go!
[overlapping chatter]
174
00:05:53,395 --> 00:05:55,725
- Yeah. Governor.
175
00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:57,112
- So you're saying
my daughter's
176
00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:59,148
gonna have to take
a two-hour bus ride
177
00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:00,652
just to get to school
every morning?
178
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,454
- Yes, but I'm told the buses
179
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:04,277
will be equipped
with a modest selection
180
00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:05,822
of discarded magazines.
181
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:07,525
- And we don't
know these people!
182
00:06:07,575 --> 00:06:08,945
How can we be sure
that Bayside's
183
00:06:08,993 --> 00:06:11,003
gonna be a safe,
welcoming environment
184
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,247
for our kids?
185
00:06:12,288 --> 00:06:13,578
- It'll be fine!
186
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:15,503
Who doesn't love kids?
187
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:17,592
- They gather together!
They loiter!
188
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,047
I'm just saying,
how do we know
189
00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:20,587
we can trust them?
[crowd murmurs in agreement]
190
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:23,090
- Look, these concerns
about a criminal element
191
00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:25,933
are unwarranted and offensive,
and for the record, sir,
192
00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:27,549
you are currently on probation
193
00:06:27,595 --> 00:06:29,675
for embezzling money
from a nursing home.
194
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,933
- Hi, Jade Huntington-Snell,
Tanner's mom.
195
00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,975
I just wanna say
that my husband and I
196
00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:36,689
are involved in a number
of inner city youth charities,
197
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:39,020
so we are really excited
about the new students.
198
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,935
- Yes, as am I,
and I think the thing
199
00:06:40,984 --> 00:06:42,784
we're losing sight of
is that these are kids,
200
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:44,779
good, bright kids
just like yours,
201
00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,281
whom the system has failed.
202
00:06:46,322 --> 00:06:47,782
- Couldn't agree more.
203
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,914
That said,
I read a Facebook article
204
00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:52,951
about an underground sex cult
where the kids snort Baby Yoda
205
00:06:52,996 --> 00:06:54,906
and worship
the YouTube demon Momo.
206
00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:56,706
What are you gonna do
to stop this?
207
00:06:56,750 --> 00:07:00,050
- I can assure you,
we have a zero tolerance policy
208
00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:01,956
when it comes to whatever it is
you're talking about.
209
00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:03,965
Now, if there are
no other questions...
210
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:05,547
all right,
I'm gonna hand this over
211
00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:07,092
to our school counselor.
212
00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:08,845
In addition to her work
at Bayside,
213
00:07:08,887 --> 00:07:10,677
she's written
over a dozen bestsellers,
214
00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:12,642
including her parenting how-to,
215
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,642
"I'm So Excited,
I'm So Scared...
216
00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:17,645
Of Becoming a Parent."
[chuckles]
217
00:07:17,687 --> 00:07:22,187
Ladies and gentlemen,
Dr. Jessica Spano.
218
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,153
- Thank you, Ron.
219
00:07:24,194 --> 00:07:25,744
Now, I know
you're all concerned
220
00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,159
about the changes coming
to Bayside, and I get it.
221
00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:30,198
As many of you know,
my son Jamie
222
00:07:30,241 --> 00:07:31,741
is a student here as well.
223
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:34,035
Of course,
I want what's best for him,
224
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:36,119
but Douglas students' parents
feel the same.
225
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:37,964
And that's why
I've devised a system
226
00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:39,539
to help ease the transition.
227
00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:41,504
Each new student will be paired
228
00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:43,844
with a current student or...
229
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,260
"Bayside buddy"
to help them acclimate.
230
00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:49,179
- And so the current students
can keep an eye on them.
231
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:50,759
- Yes.
both: No!
232
00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:53,524
[smooth rock music]
233
00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:55,846
- Hey, nice job up there,
Mama.
234
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:59,192
Sorry, I know we had
the HR meeting about this.
235
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:00,609
Dr. Mama.
236
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:01,937
- That's not
what we settled on.
237
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:03,731
- So where's your husband?
238
00:08:03,775 --> 00:08:05,185
Laying in front of a bulldozer,
239
00:08:05,235 --> 00:08:07,105
saving some female frogs
or whatever?
240
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,323
- How dare you.
241
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:09,863
René drank some essential oils
242
00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:12,196
and has been vomiting.
- Cool.
243
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:15,082
- What are you even doing here?
You never come to PTA meetings.
244
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:17,540
- Excuse me if I want
to stay informed
245
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:21,210
about potential changes
that could affect my students.
246
00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:22,961
The hot dog
I was cooking for dinner
247
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:24,593
exploded in my microwave,
and I knew
248
00:08:24,629 --> 00:08:26,089
they'd have these little donuts
I liked.
249
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,301
- Right.
250
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,220
Slater, I'm really worried
about this year.
251
00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:30,969
I just hope
we can make a safe space
252
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:33,431
for these new students.
- Yeah.
253
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:34,931
But I'm also kinda excited.
254
00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:37,313
The Douglas football team
went 6 and 2 last year.
255
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:38,980
The only thing our team
has ever won
256
00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:40,599
is when the guys did
the "Pitch Perfect" cup song
257
00:08:40,645 --> 00:08:41,975
in the talent show.
258
00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:43,902
- Bayside has plenty
of talented athletes.
259
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:45,400
What about my son, Jamie?
260
00:08:45,442 --> 00:08:47,072
- [laughs]
261
00:08:47,110 --> 00:08:48,570
[clears throat]
Oh, you're, uh, you're serious.
262
00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:51,071
Yeah, Jamie is--uh--
263
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,744
oh look, here comes Ron!
Whassup, Ron?
264
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:54,913
- I'll tell you "whassup,"
Slater,
265
00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:56,491
these parents
are driving me crazy!
266
00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:57,906
Why is everything my fault?
267
00:08:57,954 --> 00:08:59,664
Don't they know
I'm completely powerless?
268
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,746
I asked the superintendent
for a chair
269
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:03,921
that doesn't have
"little bitch" carved into it.
270
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,420
He said,
"We'll look into it...
271
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:06,802
little bitch!"
272
00:09:06,838 --> 00:09:09,418
He's gonna call me.
273
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:11,796
[upbeat rock music]
274
00:09:11,843 --> 00:09:14,263
- So, you excited
for the first day of school?
275
00:09:14,304 --> 00:09:15,684
- Girl, no.
276
00:09:15,722 --> 00:09:17,852
Douglas sucked, but at least
we knew all the tricks.
277
00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:19,231
Don't eat the meatloaf.
278
00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:21,767
Don't get into a fight
with No-Eyebrows Stacey.
279
00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:23,771
Is it weird that
I kind of miss her?
280
00:09:23,813 --> 00:09:25,443
I wonder who
she's choking out these days.
281
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:26,652
- Well, I'm excited.
282
00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:28,281
Going to Bayside
is gonna change our lives.
283
00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:29,398
I got it all planned out.
284
00:09:29,444 --> 00:09:31,404
- Hey, where the dick
is this school?
285
00:09:31,446 --> 00:09:33,946
Why is the bus stop 100 miles
away from the building?
286
00:09:33,990 --> 00:09:36,330
- I guess most
of the kids drive?
287
00:09:36,368 --> 00:09:38,408
Damn, look at
all these fancy cars.
288
00:09:38,453 --> 00:09:40,373
It's like a poster
in my little brother's room.
289
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,623
- Why is everybody so rich?
290
00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:44,245
It's a public school.
291
00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,292
- Oh, no, look,
there's a couple crappy ones.
292
00:09:46,336 --> 00:09:48,666
- Ah. [chuckles]
That's the teachers' lot.
293
00:09:49,673 --> 00:09:51,343
- Oh.
- Yeah.
294
00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:52,513
Come on.
295
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:55,720
* *
296
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:56,852
Daisy!
297
00:09:56,888 --> 00:10:03,728
* *
298
00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:05,480
- Oh, wow.
299
00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:07,772
It's so nice here.
300
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,856
It's almost messed up
how nice it is.
301
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:11,651
Like, I knew
it wouldn't have graffiti,
302
00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:13,775
but I think that's a Banksy.
303
00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:15,032
Aisha.
304
00:10:15,073 --> 00:10:17,583
Aisha, are you even
listening to me?
305
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:18,907
- No, no, not at all.
306
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,332
That is the hottest man
I have ever seen.
307
00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,871
Oh, my God, he's coming.
Shut up, shut up!
308
00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:26,495
- Hi, um...do either of you
know Aisha?
309
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,343
I'm her Bayside Buddy.
310
00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:30,918
- Yeah, I'm Aisha.
It's great to meet you.
311
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,514
This is--don't remember.
312
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,379
- I'm Jamie Spano.
- Hey.
313
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:35,586
Maybe you know my buddy.
314
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,715
Somebody named...Mac Morris?
315
00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:40,518
- Damn it, Lexi!
- Ah, Mac.
316
00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:43,347
There he is.
- Yeah, okay, I'm sorry, Mac,
317
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:45,693
but I got the parking space
fair and square.
318
00:10:45,729 --> 00:10:47,189
- Uh, I wouldn't
call that fair.
319
00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:49,770
You drugged my toothpaste
and I woke up at Six Flags.
320
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:51,686
Once I'm there,
I'm not just gonna leave!
321
00:10:51,735 --> 00:10:54,355
This means war, Lexi.
322
00:10:54,404 --> 00:10:55,704
Parking spot war.
323
00:10:55,739 --> 00:10:57,659
- Oh, you're on, Preppy.
Yeah.
324
00:10:57,699 --> 00:10:59,489
I will rob you of your sanity
325
00:10:59,534 --> 00:11:01,084
and lovingly nurse you
back to health,
326
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:02,869
only to destroy you again.
327
00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:04,542
Good luck!
[chuckles]
328
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:05,711
Girls?
329
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:07,209
[all snap fingers]
330
00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:10,168
- Hi, uh, are you Mac?
331
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,921
I think
you're my Bayside Buddy.
332
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,593
You're supposed
to show me around.
333
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:16,131
- Oh, awesome!
Hey.
334
00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:18,296
Would you be able to lay down
in a parking spot overnight
335
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:20,635
so my frenemy
can't park in it tomorrow?
336
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,100
- [laughs]
337
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:24,060
[record scratch]
Time out.
338
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,980
What did that blond fool
just say to me?
339
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:34,362
[upbeat synth music]
340
00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:35,742
* *
341
00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:37,279
- This is The Max.
342
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:38,822
It's where we like to hang out
after school.
343
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:40,445
Also before and during.
344
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:41,742
- Wait, so you guys go
345
00:11:41,785 --> 00:11:43,695
to a sit-down restaurant
every day?
346
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:45,615
Isn't that expensive?
- Yeah!
347
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:47,333
Oh, look.
There's the gang.
348
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,422
- [chuckles]
- Hey, Aisha.
349
00:11:50,460 --> 00:11:52,840
And DeVante.
What are you doing here?
350
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:55,299
- Well, Lexi's my buddy, and
she thought it might be nice
351
00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,220
for us to get the chance
to know each other.
352
00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:58,338
- Mm-hmm.
353
00:11:58,385 --> 00:11:59,505
- And I thought
it would be nice for her
354
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,802
to give me 50 bucks, so...
355
00:12:00,845 --> 00:12:01,965
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
356
00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:04,313
- So, DeVante,
what TV do you watch?
357
00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:06,309
Have you seen my reality show,
"Becoming Lexi,
358
00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:07,521
Colon, I Am Me?"
359
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:09,850
- It's about Lexi's life,
being transgender,
360
00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:11,146
her journey of self-discovery,
361
00:12:11,189 --> 00:12:12,729
and the hot friends
who support her.
362
00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:13,944
- Yeah, if you watch it,
363
00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:15,903
I'm in episode 204:
"The Big Game."
364
00:12:15,944 --> 00:12:18,574
At the end,
I score the losing touchdown!
365
00:12:18,613 --> 00:12:20,493
- [laughs] I didn't know
you played football, Jamie.
366
00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:21,872
- Really?
'Cause he's literally been
367
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:23,658
holding a football all day.
- Huh?
368
00:12:23,702 --> 00:12:24,992
Oh!
369
00:12:25,036 --> 00:12:27,746
- You know, Aisha used to play
back at Douglas.
370
00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:30,209
- You did?
Like, on the boys' team?
371
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,590
- Uh, I mean, I didn't want to,
372
00:12:32,627 --> 00:12:35,167
but they cut the girls'
athletic program.
373
00:12:35,213 --> 00:12:37,593
- But how could there
not be sports for girls?
374
00:12:37,632 --> 00:12:39,052
That's like, illegal.
375
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,642
- Why didn't
your parents complain?
376
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:42,547
- Or hold a fundraiser
where they let Rita Wilson sing
377
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,755
because that means
Tom Hanks has to come.
378
00:12:44,806 --> 00:12:46,216
- Okay, this place is weird.
379
00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:47,926
- What do you mean?
- Hope you're hungry
380
00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:49,596
for...magic!
381
00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:51,154
- Yeah!
- Every time!
382
00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:53,607
- Oh!
- Damn, I love magic!
383
00:12:53,648 --> 00:12:54,938
[upbeat music]
384
00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:57,443
- Dog, I'm telling you, man,
this school is wild.
385
00:12:57,485 --> 00:12:59,105
Like, they got
beach volleyball,
386
00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:00,324
and then a different club
387
00:13:00,363 --> 00:13:02,493
called "Beach Volleyball
(Resort Sand)."
388
00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:03,872
No cap, and there's
more people signed up
389
00:13:03,908 --> 00:13:05,538
for the
"Artisanal Bath Bomb Club"
390
00:13:05,577 --> 00:13:07,447
than football.
391
00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:09,455
- Did someone say,
"Football"?
392
00:13:09,497 --> 00:13:10,957
- Barely!
393
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:13,169
- You know, uh,
tryouts are tomorrow
394
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:14,539
if you're interested.
395
00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:16,586
- Nah, I'm good.
396
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,419
- Hey, you don't have
to do that with me, man.
397
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:19,835
I get where you're coming from.
398
00:13:19,883 --> 00:13:22,263
- I'm coming from the bathroom.
You don't know me.
399
00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:23,552
- Know you?
I was you.
400
00:13:23,595 --> 00:13:25,715
My dad was in the Army,
and I bounced around
401
00:13:25,764 --> 00:13:26,724
from school to school.
402
00:13:26,765 --> 00:13:27,845
When I transferred to Bayside,
403
00:13:27,891 --> 00:13:29,101
I had no friends,
404
00:13:29,142 --> 00:13:31,392
and an "I don't give a frig"
attitude.
405
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,266
By the way, I'm saying "frig"
'cause I'm still at work,
406
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:35,233
but after 3:00 p.m.,
I use the real word.
407
00:13:35,273 --> 00:13:37,733
- Cool.
- But this place is magic.
408
00:13:37,776 --> 00:13:39,066
This is where I met friends
409
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:41,570
and finally felt
like I belonged.
410
00:13:41,613 --> 00:13:44,123
And, you know, football
was a big part of that.
411
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:45,867
- Yeah, man, I mean,
that personal story
412
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:48,239
really brought my guard down.
413
00:13:48,286 --> 00:13:50,706
By the way, what's my name?
- Hmm?
414
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,827
- No, I'm just saying, like,
you know me so well, right?
415
00:13:52,874 --> 00:13:55,754
So...what's my name?
416
00:13:55,794 --> 00:13:57,884
- Uh...
- Don't guess.
417
00:13:57,921 --> 00:13:59,921
- No, I wasn't going to.
418
00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:01,264
- Uh-oh.
[snorts]
419
00:14:01,299 --> 00:14:02,759
My guard's going back up.
420
00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:04,931
- Tony?
- And it's up.
421
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:06,679
- And I was gonna
go out with her,
422
00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:09,391
but then this much hotter girl
asked me to go out.
423
00:14:09,432 --> 00:14:11,562
Long story short,
I faked my own death
424
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,651
and hooked up
with the hot mortician.
425
00:14:13,687 --> 00:14:16,357
- Look, I've loved all 87
of these stories,
426
00:14:16,398 --> 00:14:18,778
but can you please just tell me
where I can get my textbooks?
427
00:14:18,817 --> 00:14:19,777
- Yeah, we're here.
428
00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:21,608
Bayside is 99% paperless,
429
00:14:21,653 --> 00:14:23,783
so getting your books
is kind of a pain in the ass.
430
00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:24,782
[device boops]
431
00:14:24,823 --> 00:14:26,323
Ugh. That took forever.
432
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,776
- But what if I don't have
one of those?
433
00:14:27,826 --> 00:14:29,786
What if I can't do a boop-boop?
434
00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:31,198
- Don't have?
What is...
435
00:14:31,246 --> 00:14:32,536
what is that?
436
00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:35,000
[curious music]
437
00:14:35,041 --> 00:14:37,171
- You were right.
Bayside sucks.
438
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,920
They won't let me take
any honors classes
439
00:14:38,962 --> 00:14:40,382
'cause they said
the Douglas curriculum
440
00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:42,092
doesn't meet their standards.
441
00:14:42,132 --> 00:14:43,932
I know our school library
was just a Bible
442
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:45,217
and a bunch of army pamphlets,
443
00:14:45,260 --> 00:14:46,510
but I'm as smart
as any kid here.
444
00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:49,723
No. Smarter.
It's not fair.
445
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:53,024
- Yeah, it, uh...sucks.
446
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,519
- Wait.
Do you like it here?
447
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,562
- I'm sorry!
- Oh, my God!
448
00:14:57,605 --> 00:14:59,185
- They just--
they have everything!
449
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,402
Fancy teachers,
money for sports,
450
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:02,993
and the cafeteria's sponsored
by Wolfgang Puck,
451
00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:04,238
and he is here!
452
00:15:04,279 --> 00:15:06,029
Is it so bad to want
to enjoy that?
453
00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:07,452
- Are you actually enjoying it?
454
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,370
Or are you just dickmatized
by stupid Jamie?
455
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:10,489
Since when are you so shy
456
00:15:10,535 --> 00:15:12,075
about how good you are
at football?
457
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,330
At Douglas,
you asked the coach
458
00:15:13,371 --> 00:15:14,501
if you could play
without a helmet.
459
00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:16,249
- Yeah, so they would know
it was Aisha
460
00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:18,341
puttin' them numbers
on the scoreboard!
461
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,920
Girl, look, I know
that this school has problems,
462
00:15:21,963 --> 00:15:23,553
but it's our first day.
463
00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:25,630
- Exactly.
And it's already unfair!
464
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,505
If you don't have an iPad,
if you ride the bus,
465
00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:29,762
if you're not one of them,
you're set up to fail.
466
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:32,354
We need someone to fight for us
who knows us.
467
00:15:32,390 --> 00:15:34,100
That's why I have to be
student council president.
468
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:35,602
Now, more than ever.
469
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,653
- But you know your posters
have to be in by tomorrow.
470
00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:38,767
- What? Who said?
471
00:15:38,813 --> 00:15:40,363
- Uh, they sent out
a message about it
472
00:15:40,398 --> 00:15:41,688
on the Bayside Student app.
473
00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:43,573
- What the hell's
a Bayside Student app?
474
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:45,530
You see?
We're set up to fail.
475
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,320
You know, some of us
don't have smartphones
476
00:15:47,364 --> 00:15:48,914
'cause their moms say
they're too expensive, and...
477
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:52,658
[speaking Spanish]
478
00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:54,162
I hate this school.
479
00:15:54,204 --> 00:15:55,754
And I hate this phone!
480
00:15:57,457 --> 00:15:59,537
- Mr. Morris, get your feet
off my desk.
481
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:01,594
- Can I flip over your trashcan
and put 'em on that?
482
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,088
- No!
483
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:04,839
In general,
be less comfortable
484
00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:06,091
in here!
What do you want?
485
00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:08,222
- Lexi and I
are in a parking spot war,
486
00:16:08,259 --> 00:16:10,429
but I was reading
the student manual,
487
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,010
and it gave me an idea.
488
00:16:12,055 --> 00:16:14,845
What if you gave me your spot
and you Ubered from now on?
489
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:18,021
- Mr. Morris,
my car already is an Uber.
490
00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:19,351
- Mr. Toddman.
491
00:16:19,396 --> 00:16:20,856
- Hey, buddy.
- Hi.
492
00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:23,977
Sir, I wanted to ask about
the student council elections.
493
00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:25,605
Is it too late
to enter the race?
494
00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:27,072
- No, not at all!
495
00:16:27,112 --> 00:16:29,532
As long as your posters are up
before homeroom tomorrow.
496
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:31,912
- Oh, that's great.
Thank you.
497
00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:33,740
- Oh, Daisy, I'm so pleased.
498
00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:36,245
You know, I found a passage
you might be interested in.
499
00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,287
I tell you, you Douglas kids
have given me
500
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,871
a sense of purpose
around here.
501
00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:41,576
It's easy to get discouraged
in this job
502
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,246
when you're trying
to make a difference
503
00:16:43,294 --> 00:16:45,714
but you feel like
you're talking to a brick wall.
504
00:16:45,755 --> 00:16:48,675
[light music]
505
00:16:48,717 --> 00:16:51,177
* *
506
00:16:51,219 --> 00:16:52,429
- Hey!
507
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:54,060
You know how nervous I was
about today,
508
00:16:54,097 --> 00:16:56,177
but I feel like we're off
to a great start
509
00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:57,644
with the Douglas kids.
510
00:16:57,684 --> 00:16:59,194
- Yeah, that's the kind
of start I'm off to as well.
511
00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:01,767
[sniffs]
- Oh, no! What happened?
512
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:04,403
I made Jamie
some ants on a log.
513
00:17:04,441 --> 00:17:06,481
Do you need a snack?
514
00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:10,453
- I was trying to get this kid
from Douglas
515
00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:12,408
to join the football team,
but I blew it.
516
00:17:12,449 --> 00:17:13,579
- Mm.
- How do you get a kid
517
00:17:13,616 --> 00:17:15,036
to listen to you?
- Slater.
518
00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:17,446
If I knew that,
I'd be the greatest counselor
519
00:17:17,495 --> 00:17:18,955
in the world,
and my son wouldn't have
520
00:17:18,997 --> 00:17:20,287
named his dog "Porno."
521
00:17:20,331 --> 00:17:21,621
- It's just,
I know how it feels
522
00:17:21,666 --> 00:17:24,336
to be all alone
in a new school, and...
523
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:27,957
and trying to join in,
but you just don't know how.
524
00:17:28,006 --> 00:17:29,916
- He told you all that?
525
00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:32,386
- Not in...so many words.
526
00:17:32,427 --> 00:17:34,757
- Look, we all want
these new kids
527
00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:37,024
to feel welcome and succeed
at Bayside,
528
00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,177
but it's not gonna work
if we don't get to know them,
529
00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,725
and not just their names.
530
00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:43,309
- Yeah. 'Cause I definitely
knew his name.
531
00:17:43,355 --> 00:17:45,895
- How they feel,
what they think...
532
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:47,980
we have to stop trying
to get through to them
533
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,566
and let them get through to us.
534
00:17:49,611 --> 00:17:52,821
It's our job to make space
for every kid at Bayside
535
00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:55,244
so they become a healthy
and mature adult.
536
00:17:55,283 --> 00:17:57,333
- Hey, Mom, can I get
my ants on a log
537
00:17:57,369 --> 00:17:59,449
while you sing to me, please?
538
00:18:00,205 --> 00:18:01,745
Is that them?
539
00:18:01,790 --> 00:18:02,920
- I brought these.
540
00:18:04,334 --> 00:18:05,634
[Daisy scoffs]
541
00:18:08,380 --> 00:18:10,260
[buttons beeping]
542
00:18:10,298 --> 00:18:11,508
[line trilling]
543
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:13,509
- Hey.
- Mom, I can't pick up Hector.
544
00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:15,101
I gotta make posters
for the election.
545
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:16,346
- I'm sorry, mija.
546
00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:17,808
There's no one
to switch with me.
547
00:18:17,847 --> 00:18:19,927
- See, this is why
we need a home computer.
548
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:21,734
[Daisy's mother
speaking Spanish]
549
00:18:23,728 --> 00:18:26,188
- [sighs]
Fine. Bye. I love you.
550
00:18:26,231 --> 00:18:29,691
[upbeat rock music]
551
00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:35,874
* *
552
00:18:35,907 --> 00:18:38,537
- Can I get one "PJ Mask" book?
- No!
553
00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:41,576
- God's gonna punish you
for not letting a child read.
554
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,709
- * I got my hair
slicked back *
555
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,879
* And my boots on *
556
00:18:46,918 --> 00:18:48,248
- Let's go.
557
00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:50,554
- * Eyeshadow too *
558
00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:52,918
* I got my nails stuck on *
559
00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:55,636
- Are you still open?
- For ten minutes.
560
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:57,347
So if you're thinking
of shipping a bulk item
561
00:18:57,387 --> 00:19:00,217
that requires a specialty box
outside of continental U.S.,
562
00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:02,595
do not darken my doorway, girl.
563
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:04,522
- Nope. Just printing
a couple pictures.
564
00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,808
- [sighs]
This is boring!
565
00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:11,818
- $21.86.
566
00:19:12,610 --> 00:19:15,070
- Stupid overpriced
magician restaurant.
567
00:19:15,113 --> 00:19:18,033
Okay, I have a little problem.
568
00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:19,874
I only have a 10.00.
569
00:19:19,909 --> 00:19:21,869
Wait! No! Listen.
570
00:19:21,911 --> 00:19:24,411
I need these 'cause I'm running
for class president.
571
00:19:24,456 --> 00:19:26,996
At a new school
where people like me
572
00:19:27,042 --> 00:19:28,542
don't really have a voice.
573
00:19:28,585 --> 00:19:31,585
But if I win,
maybe I can change all that.
574
00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:34,799
So I'm asking you...Dean.
575
00:19:34,841 --> 00:19:36,631
Do you want $21?
576
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,296
Or do you want to help me
change the--
577
00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:40,385
- $21.
- Just give it to her.
578
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:42,310
She's a single mom.
579
00:19:43,433 --> 00:19:45,563
- Yeah. Please.
580
00:19:45,602 --> 00:19:47,812
Do it for my beautiful boy.
581
00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:49,614
- You lucky
today's my birthday.
582
00:19:49,647 --> 00:19:52,107
- Ooh! Happy birthday.
583
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:58,490
* *
584
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:06,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
585
00:20:09,042 --> 00:20:10,632
- Hey, buddy.
586
00:20:10,669 --> 00:20:12,879
- Wait, you're running
for president?
587
00:20:12,921 --> 00:20:14,091
- Yeah, according
to the student manual,
588
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:15,470
class president
gets the parking spot
589
00:20:15,507 --> 00:20:16,757
right in front of school.
590
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,930
- Which is even better
than the parking spot
591
00:20:18,968 --> 00:20:20,638
we were previously
fighting over.
592
00:20:20,679 --> 00:20:22,179
That's why I'm running as well.
593
00:20:22,222 --> 00:20:24,522
- Wait, how did you
make all these so fast?
594
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:26,597
[together]
Do you not have a poster guy?
595
00:20:26,643 --> 00:20:28,523
[phone rings]
- Oh.
596
00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:30,481
Oh. LeBron must be here.
597
00:20:30,522 --> 00:20:32,152
He said he'd come help me
hand out buttons.
598
00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:33,610
- Ugh. Big deal.
599
00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:35,570
I have a Kardashian
coming at lunch.
600
00:20:35,610 --> 00:20:37,490
- Yeah? Who? Rob?
601
00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:38,609
- Shut up!
602
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:41,025
He is still in their family.
603
00:20:41,074 --> 00:20:42,584
- Hey, man.
604
00:20:42,617 --> 00:20:44,487
No, you can wear your jersey.
I don't think it's thirsty.
605
00:20:44,536 --> 00:20:46,326
[whispering]
He's so thirsty.
606
00:20:46,371 --> 00:20:47,501
- It's okay.
607
00:20:47,539 --> 00:20:48,789
I worked hard on my posters,
608
00:20:48,832 --> 00:20:50,962
I'm still gonna
put up my posters.
609
00:20:51,001 --> 00:20:53,921
[tense music]
610
00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:56,172
Hey, where can I put up
my posters?!
611
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:57,844
- Hold on, Bron-Bron.
612
00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,262
Did you not reserve wall space
on the Bayside Student app?
613
00:21:00,301 --> 00:21:01,551
- Aw...
614
00:21:03,555 --> 00:21:05,425
[Daisy screams]
615
00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:15,280
[school bell rings]
616
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:16,776
- Hey, buddy.
- Hiya.
617
00:21:18,445 --> 00:21:20,485
- You okay?
- Yeah.
618
00:21:20,530 --> 00:21:21,910
[record scratch]
Don't start crying.
619
00:21:21,948 --> 00:21:23,578
- Why were you
so upset earlier?
620
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:26,406
- I wasn't upset.
- Do you...
621
00:21:26,453 --> 00:21:28,833
want to go to The Max and have
a dance contest about it?
622
00:21:28,872 --> 00:21:30,332
- [voice breaks]
No.
623
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:32,833
[record scratch]
Oh, no, too late.
624
00:21:32,876 --> 00:21:35,496
Look, I always believed
that if you worked hard enough,
625
00:21:35,545 --> 00:21:37,505
anything was possible.
626
00:21:37,547 --> 00:21:39,337
But being here
627
00:21:39,382 --> 00:21:40,632
made me realize
that's only true
628
00:21:40,675 --> 00:21:42,085
for kids like you.
629
00:21:42,135 --> 00:21:43,925
- Hot kids?
630
00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:46,560
- Privileged kids.
- Privileged kids...
631
00:21:46,598 --> 00:21:48,218
- One of you will be
class president,
632
00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:50,516
and you'll put it
on an application to a college
633
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:52,900
that your parents
already paid your way into.
634
00:21:52,937 --> 00:21:54,897
The deck is stacked so high
in your favor
635
00:21:54,939 --> 00:21:57,569
that people like me
never even had a chance.
636
00:21:57,609 --> 00:21:58,739
And it's too bad,
'cause I would've been
637
00:21:58,777 --> 00:22:00,607
a great president.
638
00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:03,203
I actually want
to make the school better.
639
00:22:03,239 --> 00:22:04,529
I want to go to Washington
640
00:22:04,574 --> 00:22:06,494
for the Spring Break
Leadership Conference.
641
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:09,084
I want everyone's voices
to be heard.
642
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,790
But you don't.
643
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,500
You just want a parking space.
644
00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:16,291
[school bell rings]
645
00:22:16,336 --> 00:22:18,166
- [sighs]
646
00:22:18,213 --> 00:22:19,383
Man, did you hear that?
647
00:22:19,422 --> 00:22:21,132
- Yeah...
648
00:22:21,174 --> 00:22:22,804
the president has to spend
spring break
649
00:22:22,842 --> 00:22:24,722
at a leadership conference?
- I can't do that.
650
00:22:24,761 --> 00:22:26,301
That's when I go
on spring break.
651
00:22:26,346 --> 00:22:28,056
- I would literally die.
652
00:22:28,098 --> 00:22:29,768
- We have to make this better.
- We have to make this right.
653
00:22:29,808 --> 00:22:30,978
- Sorry, I thought you were
gonna say "better."
654
00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:31,977
- I wasn't.
655
00:22:33,645 --> 00:22:35,685
- Hey, man. Can we talk?
656
00:22:37,565 --> 00:22:39,275
- Did you just sit backwards
in a chair?
657
00:22:39,317 --> 00:22:41,817
Wow, I've never seen
anyone do that in real life.
658
00:22:41,861 --> 00:22:43,911
- Look, I'm sorry
about yesterday.
659
00:22:43,947 --> 00:22:47,027
And you're right.
I don't know you.
660
00:22:47,075 --> 00:22:50,035
Honestly, I was just
looking out for myself.
661
00:22:50,078 --> 00:22:51,868
It may seem like I'm a hot,
happening guy
662
00:22:51,913 --> 00:22:53,083
who's got it all together--
663
00:22:53,123 --> 00:22:54,333
- You're a gym teacher,
and I saw you
664
00:22:54,374 --> 00:22:55,674
eating soup in your car.
665
00:22:55,709 --> 00:22:56,789
- That was melted ice cream.
666
00:22:56,835 --> 00:22:58,955
[sighs]
But...
667
00:22:59,004 --> 00:23:01,014
the truth is, I need a win.
668
00:23:01,047 --> 00:23:03,007
I'm a director
of an athletics program
669
00:23:03,049 --> 00:23:05,299
that hasn't beaten Valley
in 15 years.
670
00:23:05,343 --> 00:23:08,223
Anyway, I'm sorry...
671
00:23:08,263 --> 00:23:10,143
and I wanna listen.
672
00:23:10,849 --> 00:23:13,059
- Look, you're not
the first person
673
00:23:13,101 --> 00:23:15,021
to look at me and ask
if I played football.
674
00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:16,651
I can't do anything
without people
675
00:23:16,688 --> 00:23:18,398
making assumptions about me.
676
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,860
I play football,
I'm up to no good,
677
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,610
I'm related to Montell Jordan--
678
00:23:22,652 --> 00:23:24,702
which I am,
but it's through marriage.
679
00:23:24,738 --> 00:23:26,608
The point is,
even if I wanted to join in,
680
00:23:26,656 --> 00:23:29,026
it's not that simple.
681
00:23:29,075 --> 00:23:30,285
- Man.
682
00:23:31,661 --> 00:23:33,371
Back when I went to Bayside,
if you had a problem,
683
00:23:33,413 --> 00:23:34,663
it could usually be fixed
684
00:23:34,706 --> 00:23:36,916
with a vaguely
inspirational speech, but...
685
00:23:38,335 --> 00:23:40,205
That doesn't seem like
it's gonna work here, huh?
686
00:23:40,253 --> 00:23:41,923
- No.
687
00:23:42,714 --> 00:23:44,724
- And you wouldn't want me
to try,
688
00:23:44,758 --> 00:23:45,968
even if I thought of a good one
689
00:23:46,009 --> 00:23:47,759
based on
what you told me, right?
690
00:23:47,802 --> 00:23:49,552
- Well, technically,
it's not a white savior thing
691
00:23:49,596 --> 00:23:51,216
because you're Mexican, so...
692
00:23:51,264 --> 00:23:54,104
- Thank you!
No one ever talks about that.
693
00:23:54,142 --> 00:23:55,192
Look, man.
694
00:23:55,226 --> 00:23:56,726
You're never gonna be able
to control
695
00:23:56,770 --> 00:23:58,360
what people assume about you,
696
00:23:58,396 --> 00:24:00,646
so if there's something
you want to do here,
697
00:24:00,690 --> 00:24:02,900
something that can
make you happy,
698
00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:04,902
well, you might as well
just go for it
699
00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:07,074
and let people assume
what they want.
700
00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:09,323
- All right,
I'll keep that in mind.
701
00:24:09,366 --> 00:24:10,906
Thanks, Coach.
702
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:12,290
- You're welcome, DeVante.
703
00:24:12,327 --> 00:24:14,827
- That's not how
you pronounce my name.
704
00:24:15,997 --> 00:24:17,787
I'm just messing with you.
That's a joke.
705
00:24:17,832 --> 00:24:19,462
You did all right.
- You got me.
706
00:24:19,501 --> 00:24:22,421
[low soft rock music]
707
00:24:22,462 --> 00:24:29,392
* *
708
00:24:32,472 --> 00:24:34,432
- Attention, please,
it is now time to hear
709
00:24:34,474 --> 00:24:37,274
from our candidates
for sophomore class president.
710
00:24:37,310 --> 00:24:39,150
Mr. Morris,
would you like to begin with--
711
00:24:39,187 --> 00:24:40,767
ah! Stop!
712
00:24:40,814 --> 00:24:42,864
[smack]
Ow! Ow!
713
00:24:42,899 --> 00:24:43,979
[door slams shut]
714
00:24:44,025 --> 00:24:45,815
- Good morning, Bayside.
715
00:24:45,860 --> 00:24:49,910
I'm Mac Morris, and I believe
in the power of a good idea.
716
00:24:49,948 --> 00:24:51,828
Like my idea that teachers
717
00:24:51,866 --> 00:24:54,656
should randomly give you Fs
for no reason
718
00:24:54,703 --> 00:24:56,293
and that we should get rid
of school dances
719
00:24:56,329 --> 00:24:58,789
and use that money
to plant a weird tree.
720
00:24:58,832 --> 00:24:59,872
Thank you.
721
00:24:59,916 --> 00:25:00,916
[record scratch]
- Wait.
722
00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,539
Is he trying to lose?
723
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:05,295
- And now, for our next
presidential candidate,
724
00:25:05,338 --> 00:25:06,798
Daisy!
- [mouths word] What?
725
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,970
- Hi, Bayside!
I'm Daisy.
726
00:25:09,009 --> 00:25:12,009
And I promise to get Lizzo
to perform at prom,
727
00:25:12,053 --> 00:25:15,103
and the theme will be,
"Everybody Gets 50 Bucks."
728
00:25:15,140 --> 00:25:16,640
- I don't know
who this Daisy girl is,
729
00:25:16,683 --> 00:25:17,983
but she sounds great.
730
00:25:18,018 --> 00:25:19,438
- Okay, wait.
They're lying.
731
00:25:19,477 --> 00:25:21,687
I'm Daisy!
They're pretending to be me.
732
00:25:21,730 --> 00:25:24,610
- In my Bayside, every lamp
will be a ring light
733
00:25:24,649 --> 00:25:26,229
so no one will be an uggo.
734
00:25:26,276 --> 00:25:28,566
- No, no!
That's not my platform.
735
00:25:28,611 --> 00:25:29,951
I was running for president
736
00:25:29,988 --> 00:25:31,988
'cause I wanted
to give people like me a voice,
737
00:25:32,032 --> 00:25:33,242
and now
these white ding-a-lings
738
00:25:33,283 --> 00:25:35,123
are literally
stealing my voice!
739
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,370
- So do you want us
to vote for Daisy or not?
740
00:25:37,412 --> 00:25:38,912
- Well--I mean--
741
00:25:38,955 --> 00:25:41,115
I want to be class president,
but not if it's--
742
00:25:41,166 --> 00:25:42,786
- And God as my witness,
I vow that
743
00:25:42,834 --> 00:25:46,214
each and every student
will get their own micro pig.
744
00:25:46,254 --> 00:25:47,344
- Yes!
745
00:25:53,678 --> 00:25:57,178
* *
746
00:25:57,223 --> 00:25:58,933
- All right, everybody.
Line up.
747
00:25:58,975 --> 00:26:00,845
- Hold up, Coach.
I think we got one more coming.
748
00:26:00,894 --> 00:26:02,404
And that kid
looks tough as hell.
749
00:26:04,856 --> 00:26:05,976
- Hey, Coach!
750
00:26:08,651 --> 00:26:09,781
- Hey.
751
00:26:12,655 --> 00:26:14,365
- [knocks on door]
- Daisy!
752
00:26:14,407 --> 00:26:16,657
Hey, congratulations
on your win.
753
00:26:16,701 --> 00:26:18,871
- Thanks, but...
754
00:26:18,912 --> 00:26:20,502
I can't be class president.
755
00:26:20,538 --> 00:26:21,918
I mean, I don't deserve it.
756
00:26:21,956 --> 00:26:23,876
That wasn't me
giving the speech this morning.
757
00:26:23,917 --> 00:26:25,917
- Oh, I know.
Mac and Lexi locked me
758
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:28,960
in a dark supply closet
so they could use the PA.
759
00:26:29,005 --> 00:26:30,665
I was very scared.
760
00:26:30,715 --> 00:26:32,295
But you don't have to bow out!
761
00:26:32,342 --> 00:26:34,012
You did technically win!
762
00:26:34,052 --> 00:26:35,472
- Yeah, but I wanted to win
the right way.
763
00:26:35,512 --> 00:26:37,682
I wanted it to be fair.
764
00:26:37,722 --> 00:26:39,312
- Oh.
765
00:26:39,349 --> 00:26:40,269
Have a seat.
766
00:26:43,019 --> 00:26:45,729
Listen, it was never
going to be fair.
767
00:26:45,772 --> 00:26:49,072
Was it fair you only heard
about the election yesterday?
768
00:26:49,109 --> 00:26:51,699
And Mac's campaign jingle
was written by Migos?
769
00:26:51,736 --> 00:26:54,526
Was it fair these kids
were born in the Palisades
770
00:26:54,572 --> 00:26:56,952
and you weren't?
Daisy!
771
00:26:56,991 --> 00:26:59,081
The universe got one
right today.
772
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,159
You're here,
and you're the president.
773
00:27:02,205 --> 00:27:04,455
And you certainly
proved to me...
774
00:27:04,499 --> 00:27:06,669
that you deserved it.
775
00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:08,250
- Where did you get those?
776
00:27:08,294 --> 00:27:09,964
- Oh, I have a deal
with the janitor.
777
00:27:10,005 --> 00:27:11,585
He just gives me
all the cool stuff
778
00:27:11,631 --> 00:27:12,801
the kids throw out.
779
00:27:12,841 --> 00:27:15,261
I got a Gucci hat
and a necklace.
780
00:27:15,301 --> 00:27:16,851
That smells.
781
00:27:16,886 --> 00:27:18,466
- Cool.
- Listen.
782
00:27:18,513 --> 00:27:19,853
These kids...
783
00:27:19,889 --> 00:27:23,099
they can be sheltered
and clueless.
784
00:27:23,143 --> 00:27:25,903
But there's one thing
they get right.
785
00:27:25,937 --> 00:27:27,517
They never feel guilty
786
00:27:27,564 --> 00:27:30,824
about taking their seat
at the table.
787
00:27:30,859 --> 00:27:33,859
And I know you deserve
a seat there too.
788
00:27:33,903 --> 00:27:37,453
And if you don't take it,
Daisy...
789
00:27:37,490 --> 00:27:39,080
how else are we gonna
make this place
790
00:27:39,117 --> 00:27:41,287
a little more fair?
791
00:27:41,327 --> 00:27:42,657
- Yeah.
792
00:27:42,704 --> 00:27:44,044
Thanks, Principal Toddman.
793
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:48,380
* *
794
00:27:50,003 --> 00:27:51,553
- Whassup?
795
00:27:51,588 --> 00:27:53,208
I'm DeVante Young,
796
00:27:53,256 --> 00:27:56,176
and I'm here to audition
for the musical.
797
00:27:56,801 --> 00:27:59,511
- Mm-kay.
Whenever you are ready.
798
00:27:59,554 --> 00:28:00,474
[clears throat]
799
00:28:02,724 --> 00:28:04,774
- * I believe *
800
00:28:04,809 --> 00:28:08,399
* The children are our future *
801
00:28:08,438 --> 00:28:14,318
* Teach them well and let them
lead the way *
802
00:28:14,361 --> 00:28:18,531
* Show them all the beauty
they possess *
803
00:28:18,573 --> 00:28:22,043
* Inside *
804
00:28:22,077 --> 00:28:25,867
* Give them a sense of pride *
805
00:28:25,914 --> 00:28:28,794
* To make it easier *
806
00:28:28,833 --> 00:28:33,343
* Let the children's laughter *
807
00:28:33,380 --> 00:28:37,680
* Remind us how we used to be *
808
00:28:37,717 --> 00:28:40,757
* I decided long ago *
809
00:28:40,804 --> 00:28:44,894
* Never to walk
in anyone's shadow *
810
00:28:44,933 --> 00:28:47,983
* If I fail, if I succeed *
811
00:28:48,019 --> 00:28:51,309
* At least I lived
as I believed *
812
00:28:51,356 --> 00:28:55,276
* No matter what
they take from me *
813
00:28:55,318 --> 00:28:59,238
* They can't take away
my dignity *
814
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:04,160
* Because the greatest *
815
00:29:04,202 --> 00:29:09,462
* Love of all
is happening to me *
816
00:29:09,499 --> 00:29:10,709
* *
817
00:29:10,750 --> 00:29:12,590
- Hey, buddy. Listen.
818
00:29:12,627 --> 00:29:14,707
No need to thank us
for rigging the race.
819
00:29:14,754 --> 00:29:17,304
- Yeah, all we ask in return
is that you give us
820
00:29:17,340 --> 00:29:18,760
the president's parking spot.
821
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:19,880
- And we actually learned
822
00:29:19,926 --> 00:29:21,386
a pretty important lesson
this week.
823
00:29:21,428 --> 00:29:22,888
It's great to win,
but sometimes,
824
00:29:22,929 --> 00:29:24,059
it's even better...
825
00:29:24,097 --> 00:29:25,307
[together]
to share.
826
00:29:25,348 --> 00:29:26,808
- Hm.
827
00:29:26,850 --> 00:29:27,890
No.
828
00:29:27,934 --> 00:29:29,564
both: What?
- I said no.
829
00:29:29,602 --> 00:29:32,192
I'm the president,
and that parking space is mine.
830
00:29:32,230 --> 00:29:34,980
- [scoffs]
Are you kidding me, brah?
831
00:29:35,025 --> 00:29:36,565
- Okay, but you don't even
have a car.
832
00:29:36,609 --> 00:29:38,819
What are you gonna use
a parking spot for?
833
00:29:38,862 --> 00:29:40,072
- What is she doing?
834
00:29:40,113 --> 00:29:45,243
- * Because the greatest *
835
00:29:45,285 --> 00:29:50,915
* Love of all is happening
to me *
836
00:29:50,957 --> 00:29:53,747
[vocalizing]
837
00:29:53,793 --> 00:29:54,963
- First order of business.
838
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:56,423
I want to move the bus stop.
839
00:29:56,463 --> 00:29:58,013
You know the president's
parking spot
840
00:29:58,048 --> 00:29:59,718
right in front of the school?
841
00:29:59,758 --> 00:30:01,258
I want to move it there.
842
00:30:01,301 --> 00:30:06,931
- * I found the greatest *
843
00:30:06,973 --> 00:30:08,773
* Love of all *
844
00:30:08,808 --> 00:30:10,808
* Inside *
845
00:30:10,852 --> 00:30:12,522
* Of *
846
00:30:12,562 --> 00:30:18,992
* Me *
847
00:30:22,405 --> 00:30:23,945
We good?
848
00:30:23,990 --> 00:30:25,080
- Yeah.
849
00:30:25,116 --> 00:30:26,616
- Cool.
850
00:30:26,659 --> 00:30:29,619
[upbeat pop music]
851
00:30:29,662 --> 00:30:36,592
* *
852
00:30:53,019 --> 00:30:55,309
- * Don't need to tell you *
853
00:30:55,355 --> 00:30:57,975
* What you already know *
854
00:30:58,024 --> 00:31:01,614
* *
855
00:31:01,653 --> 00:31:04,163
* Don't wanna hear you say *
856
00:31:04,197 --> 00:31:06,657
* That you told me so *
857
00:31:06,700 --> 00:31:10,330
* *
858
00:31:10,370 --> 00:31:12,460
* Can't even argue *
859
00:31:12,497 --> 00:31:15,577
* I wouldn't know
where to start *
860
00:31:15,625 --> 00:31:19,125
* *
861
00:31:19,170 --> 00:31:21,170
* How many letters *
862
00:31:21,214 --> 00:31:23,974
* To spell a broken heart? *
863
00:31:24,009 --> 00:31:26,549
* *
864
00:31:27,305 --> 00:32:27,699
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