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1
00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:02,199
(POP MUSIC ON RADIO)
2
00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:04,634
Do you think that's enough potatoes?
3
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:06,073
Let's see.
4
00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:07,718
Jaz isn't a big eater,
5
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:09,518
Ian, he'll take three.
6
00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:10,908
There's Colin.
7
00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:12,353
Cathy won't take that much.
8
00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:14,950
I'll take a couple of roast and you?
9
00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:18,155
Yeah, I'd better do more.
10
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:21,836
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
11
00:00:36,160 --> 00:00:37,673
Cathy!
12
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:45,473
This wine isn't that cold, Cath.
13
00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:49,469
Oh, Eric's had his strimmer out.
14
00:00:49,560 --> 00:00:51,039
The garden's looking very nice.
15
00:00:56,080 --> 00:00:57,911
- (DOORBELL RINGS)
- Cathy, look.
16
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,833
Don't even speak to me, you little...
17
00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:01,909
Cock!
18
00:01:02,920 --> 00:01:04,353
Oh, hi, Eric.
19
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:07,949
Hi, Eric.
20
00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:19,032
Bottle of wine, for a lovely host.
21
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:20,519
Oh. Very kind of ya.
22
00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:22,069
What've we got here?
23
00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:23,388
- Spanish...
- Screw-top.
24
00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:24,954
Ah.
25
00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:26,234
So, um...
26
00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:28,073
- How youse doing?
- Good. Yeah, uh-huh.
27
00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:29,229
Really happy.
28
00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:30,669
Ah.
29
00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:32,637
- Well, I...
- Yeah, lovely.
30
00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:34,153
Yeah, go for it, Eric. Fuck it.
31
00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:36,349
Right.
32
00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:39,671
ERIC: Beth, that's Cath and Col here.
33
00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:46,633
- Oh, here she is!
- Hi, Cath.
34
00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:50,150
Hello, missus. Oh, you smell all...
35
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:51,992
- Kitchen.
- Hmm.
36
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:55,792
- You all right, Beth?
- Fine, yes, it's all under control.
37
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,233
Is it, Beth? That's good, so am I.
38
00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:00,472
Well, something smells good, eh?
39
00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:01,789
Leg of lamb.
40
00:02:01,880 --> 00:02:02,869
A leg of lamb?
41
00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:05,437
Eric, a leg of lamb?
42
00:02:05,520 --> 00:02:06,794
Aye. That's a Sunday lunch.
43
00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:08,349
Oh, aye.
44
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,039
How long since we did this, eh?
45
00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:11,235
BETH: Aye, too long.
46
00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,470
It's good to keep
the traditions going, isn't it?
47
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:15,678
I mean, like, when we all
get together for,
48
00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:16,954
well, for Sunday lunch,
49
00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:18,475
Christmas,
50
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,149
funerals.
51
00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:23,552
Well, I hope youse all like
roast potatoes.
52
00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,358
Roast potatoes on the go, eh?
53
00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:27,908
Not just any old potatoes though, eh?
54
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,912
Oh, really, Eric.
Special potatoes, Beth?
55
00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:33,239
Well. No, not really.
56
00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,834
We just picked up a big bag
at the farmers' market yesterday.
57
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,712
Ooh, farmers' market.
58
00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:40,954
Big sausages and brown paper and...
59
00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:43,754
Land Rovers and pigs with no heads.
60
00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:46,709
Aye.
61
00:02:47,320 --> 00:02:50,790
Erm, well you're more than welcome
to take some away if you want.
62
00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:52,748
And do what with them?
63
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,068
- Well, cook them.
- No.
64
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:55,829
IAN: Hello!
65
00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:57,309
ERIC: Ah!
BETH: Ah.
66
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:58,753
It's Ian and Jaz!
67
00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:00,671
Ian and Jaz!
68
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,637
(GASPS) Peck on the lips,
peck on the lips, Jaz.
69
00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:03,709
(KISSES LOUDLY)
70
00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:04,835
Oh.
71
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:06,718
I bet he's a lovely kisser, Ian.
72
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:08,593
BETH: You all right, Jaz?
73
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,074
Feeling OK?
74
00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,112
- Fine, yeah.
- Have you not been well, Jaz?
75
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:13,389
- (WHIMPERS)
- Yeah, but,
76
00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:14,754
he's going back to work tomorrow.
77
00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:15,989
Are you?
78
00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:17,954
- It's no big deal, is it?
- (TIMER DINGS)
79
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:19,549
Oh.
80
00:03:19,640 --> 00:03:21,232
'Course it's not.
You nervous about it, Jaz?
81
00:03:21,560 --> 00:03:22,595
Cathy.
82
00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:24,508
- Hold your hand out.
- What?
83
00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:27,633
Little bit shaky.
84
00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:28,948
He'll be fine.
There's nothing to worry about.
85
00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:30,109
Mmm-hmm.
86
00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:31,872
- BETH: Ian!
- That's your mum wanting ya,
87
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:33,109
give her a hand.
88
00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,234
I should go as well.
89
00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:38,796
Get a look at Beth's big potatoes.
90
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:43,589
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
91
00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:50,671
Stress you were off with, wasn't it?
92
00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:54,669
So...
93
00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:56,598
Everything all right,
what have you been up to?
94
00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:58,193
Not much. Pretty quiet.
95
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,394
Been saving up to buy a house...
96
00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:01,993
Yeah, that's great. Beth,
could you open a window?
97
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,674
Really hot in here and it really smells.
98
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:06,593
- What are we having?
- Lamb.
99
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,279
Leg of lamb.
100
00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:09,994
What's Jaz getting?
101
00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:11,953
- Oh, God.
- What's the matter?
102
00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:14,675
- Jaz is a vegetarian.
- Oh, no.
103
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:16,759
He can have the potatoes though.
104
00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:18,108
What else have you got, Beth?
105
00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:19,349
Erm, eggs.
106
00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:20,555
Er...
107
00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:22,388
Tin of tuna.
108
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:23,879
He won't eat any of that.
109
00:04:23,960 --> 00:04:25,632
Er, lettuce?
110
00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:29,190
Well, there's all these potatoes here.
He can have a...
111
00:04:29,280 --> 00:04:30,759
Baked potato or
112
00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:31,989
a potato pie.
113
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:33,593
I'll just go to the shop
and pick something up.
114
00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:34,949
Oh, my God.
115
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,031
What about a potato sandwich?
116
00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:40,158
I am not making Jaz
a potato sandwich, Cathy.
117
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:42,676
My God, Beth, there's loads!
118
00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:44,109
I know.
119
00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,031
- These are organic as well.
- Are they?
120
00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:47,838
Well, the shit's still on them,
they must be.
121
00:04:48,240 --> 00:04:51,437
So, that will be you up and out of
your bed at a decent time tomorrow.
122
00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:53,074
- Yeah.
- Oof!
123
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:54,513
That'll be a shock to the system.
124
00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:55,828
Oh, you know.
125
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:57,478
And, see, the roads at that time
of the morning.
126
00:04:57,760 --> 00:04:58,875
Oh. It'll be OK.
127
00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:00,388
Aye.
128
00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:01,795
Is it M8 you go?
129
00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:03,149
- Yeah.
- Eric.
130
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:04,759
- Eh?
- M8 in the morning.
131
00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:06,468
That's the way you
used to go, isn't it?
132
00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:09,028
Oh, aye, aye.
Oh, God that was a nightmare.
133
00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:10,917
You said it was like Wacky Races,
did you not?
134
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,468
- Aye, when it's moving.
- Well, that's one thing, Jaz.
135
00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:16,074
You cannae get killed
when you're at a standstill.
136
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:19,480
Although if something rams something
from behind,
137
00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,598
you do get the Concertina Effect.
138
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:22,948
Ooh, aye. Nasty.
139
00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:25,235
And that wee Corsa of yours
with the sunroof,
140
00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:27,151
you could pop out of that
like a jack-in-the-box.
141
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:28,593
- I'm just stepping to the shop.
- You what?
142
00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:29,669
I'll be 10 minutes.
143
00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:32,029
I could always get the train.
144
00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:33,838
COLIN: The train, yes, good idea.
145
00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:35,399
Aye, plenty of folk take the train.
146
00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:37,072
Let the train take the strain.
147
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,036
See that crush at the barriers
at Edinburgh last week?
148
00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:43,389
(INHALES DEEPLY)
149
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:47,031
Cathy, get the parsnips out of there,
would you, please?
150
00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:56,879
They're like white carrots.
151
00:06:01,480 --> 00:06:02,708
There you go.
152
00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:04,389
Ta.
153
00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:10,753
Is everything all right
with you and Colin?
154
00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:13,519
Well. Yeah.
155
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,309
More or less. (CHUCKLES)
156
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:24,038
Oh, Beth, I don't know what to do.
157
00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:25,189
What is it, Cathy?
158
00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:29,274
Colin was out on Friday night
with those wankers
159
00:06:29,360 --> 00:06:30,509
from the golf club.
160
00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:32,757
And when he came in,
he said he'd been in a pub.
161
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:34,752
But then last night,
I was on the Facebook
162
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,590
and he had been tagged
in a picture that was taken...
163
00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:41,110
...in a lap-dancing bar.
- Oof.
164
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,235
Are you sure?
165
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:48,199
Oh!
166
00:06:48,280 --> 00:06:49,918
That's definitely a lap-dancing bar.
167
00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,475
Oh, Sophie, there's Ian.
168
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,115
Ian!
169
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,312
Hi. Christine.
170
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:05,239
- Hi, Sophie.
- Hiya.
171
00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,158
Is this you in doing your shopping?
172
00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,511
I'm just getting something for Jaz,
for his lunch.
173
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:12,593
Hey. There's tins of custard
round there.
174
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:15,793
Reduced to 59, isn't that right, Sophie?
175
00:07:15,920 --> 00:07:16,909
Yeah.
176
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:20,037
Custard with banana sliced in,
have you ever had that, Ian?
177
00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:23,714
- No.
- There's UHT milk as well,
178
00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:25,950
that's originally been
part of a multi-pack.
179
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:27,314
Is there? Right.
180
00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:30,314
- Listen, I'd better...
- Watch your step round there.
181
00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:33,597
'Cause some wee lass went and smashed
a bottle of white wine vinegar.
182
00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:37,992
The yellow triangle's up,
but no sign of the blue roll as yet.
183
00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:39,709
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
184
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:41,718
- Well, it's nice to see ya!
- Oh, aye!
185
00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:43,552
You too! Here...
186
00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:46,393
How come you're doing
your shopping in here?
187
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,514
You've got that big Tesco
right at your back door.
188
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:51,272
Oh, no, we're up at my mum's.
189
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:53,312
Oh, right. (CHUCKLES)
190
00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,799
So how come you're
having to buy Jaz's lunch?
191
00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:58,109
Well, we're all...
192
00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:03,919
Having lamb.
193
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:06,758
Lamb. Hmm.
194
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,799
Oh, I like lamb.
195
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:12,119
So, if I phone up to query my bill,
196
00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:13,669
you're the guy that answers?
197
00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,034
No, not straightaway.
198
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,235
You go through the options first.
199
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:20,189
Oh, aye, aye. Press one for billing,
two for meter reading and three for
200
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,352
such and such and all that shite.
201
00:08:22,880 --> 00:08:24,074
- Yeah.
- So,
202
00:08:24,360 --> 00:08:25,713
I choose my option.
203
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,433
- And then you pick up.
- Yeah.
204
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:29,671
- Well, as long as there's not a queue.
- Oh.
205
00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:31,872
- The queue.
- Oh, jeez.
206
00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,791
- With the music.
- Oh, God!
207
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:36,116
Do you guys see as to what music
it is that they play?
208
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:37,189
- No.
- No?
209
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:38,349
It come from head office.
210
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:40,670
Oh, here, he's got the lingo,
down to a tee, Eric.
211
00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:42,956
"It's nothing to do with me,
it's head office."
212
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:44,315
Fat cat central.
213
00:08:44,640 --> 00:08:45,959
Aye, they're doing all right.
214
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,598
The poor workers don't see any of it.
215
00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:49,069
There's poor Jaz,
216
00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:51,515
stressed to breaking point,
getting paid peanuts.
217
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,955
And no rights.
Sack you on the spot if you like.
218
00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:55,993
So, I'm on the phone.
219
00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:57,993
I've done everything I've meant to.
220
00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,230
I've pressed my buttons.
I've waited in my queue.
221
00:09:00,680 --> 00:09:02,955
I've hung on and hung on and hung on.
222
00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:04,953
And I've finally got to the front.
223
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:07,750
And I am ready for blood.
224
00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:12,275
Is that where you come in?
225
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:14,789
(IN SQUEAKY VOICE)
I'm just going to the toilet.
226
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:24,199
Oh, here we go. That's us.
227
00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:26,955
He's a good, smooth driver,
isn't he, Sophie?
228
00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:28,629
Lovely.
229
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:32,156
More than can be said for some
of the private hires we've been getting.
230
00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:33,628
What are they like, Sophie?
231
00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:35,678
I said to that one last week,
232
00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:39,275
"Hey, hey! She's pregnant.
And I've had a big lunch,
233
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:41,318
"so less of the Lewis Hamiltons."
234
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:48,595
Look. These nights out, Cathy.
They end up having too much to drink
235
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:50,398
and then they just get carried away.
236
00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:51,515
That's what he said.
237
00:09:53,080 --> 00:09:54,513
He said he kept his eyes shut
238
00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:55,875
and his hand on his pint.
239
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:57,712
- Well, there you go.
- I don't believe him.
240
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,233
Oh, Cathy.
241
00:09:59,320 --> 00:10:00,355
Look at me, Beth.
242
00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:02,351
Look at me! Look at my arse!
243
00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:03,869
Hmm?
244
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,640
I've done spin classes
for seven years, Beth!
245
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:08,957
I've done Pilates for five, I've had...
246
00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,189
I've had my teeth whitened.
247
00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:12,271
I've been waxed, bleached and douched.
248
00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:14,272
All so he can walk into a bar
249
00:10:14,560 --> 00:10:16,835
and watch some young girl that's
travelled halfway across the world
250
00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:20,435
in the boot of a car,
slide up and down a pole for 15 quid.
251
00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:21,869
Oh, Cathy.
252
00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:23,109
I mean sometimes, Beth,
253
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:27,558
I wish I was more like you and
I didn't give a shit what I looked like.
254
00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:31,189
(SIGHS)
255
00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:34,557
- (DOOR OPENS)
- CHRISTINE: Oh, bastard sciatica.
256
00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:35,995
(DOOR CLOSES)
257
00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:38,310
Just dump the bags there, Sophie.
258
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:41,356
- What?
- Bumped into them at the supermarket.
259
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:44,469
Oh, you're here as well, eh?
260
00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:46,552
No show without Punch.
261
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:49,433
We won't stop long, Eric.
262
00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:52,590
We don't want to outstay our welcome.
(CHUCKLES)
263
00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:57,028
A welcome usually follows an invitation
and there wasn't one of those.
264
00:10:57,120 --> 00:10:58,269
- Mum...
- Where's Jaz?
265
00:10:58,680 --> 00:11:00,557
- He's, uh...
- Beth busy, is she?
266
00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:02,198
- She's in the kitchen.
- Oh, right.
267
00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:04,271
Aye, she'll have her hands full, eh?
268
00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:07,794
To full to pick up the fucking phone
and ring me.
269
00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:08,949
Mum!
270
00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:10,393
- Oh, hi, Christine.
- Mum.
271
00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:11,469
Where's Jaz?
272
00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:12,834
I don't know.
273
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:14,273
He's away off for a slash, Beth.
274
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,916
Hello, Beth. (CHUCKLES)
275
00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:21,279
Hope you don't mind us dropping by,
we bumped into Ian in the supermarket.
276
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:22,749
No, no, it's fine.
277
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:24,989
(SMACKS LIPS)
278
00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:27,192
Something smells nice.
279
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:32,596
Would you like to stay
and have something to eat?
280
00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:37,595
Oh, no, we've got quiche there
that needs to be used by tonight.
281
00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,393
- All right.
- And there's fresh cream
282
00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:42,597
for on top of my Viennetta,
that needs to go in the fridge.
283
00:11:42,680 --> 00:11:45,319
- Well, it was just, er...
- And fish fingers as well.
284
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:48,358
I'm shovelling those
omega threes into her.
285
00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,078
Well, Pat over the back,
286
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,153
her daughter took them
287
00:11:52,240 --> 00:11:55,596
and see that granddaughter,
talk about smart!
288
00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:58,315
Pat only has to shout, "Cigarette!"
289
00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:00,595
And that wee one's
right there with a lighter.
290
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:04,912
Well, if you'd like to stay,
you're more than welcome.
291
00:12:05,440 --> 00:12:06,429
Ah.
292
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:07,549
What are you having?
293
00:12:08,440 --> 00:12:09,429
Lamb.
294
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:13,829
With?
295
00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:17,071
- Potatoes.
- What kind of potatoes?
296
00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:19,628
Boiled and roast.
297
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,479
I don't mind roast.
298
00:12:21,560 --> 00:12:23,312
Well, then I'll stick
a couple of extra in.
299
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:25,118
Oh, but not great big ones.
300
00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:26,749
OK. Wee ones.
301
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:28,796
Aye, wee ones, could you slice them up?
302
00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:31,233
- Yep, fine.
- Mmm-hmm.
303
00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:32,429
Not too thin, though.
304
00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:34,109
Not too thin.
305
00:12:34,680 --> 00:12:35,669
Quite chunky.
306
00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:37,678
Chunky. What, like chips?
307
00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:39,393
Oh, chips would be lovely.
308
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:50,789
Jaz?
309
00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:54,037
Jaz? Are you in there?
310
00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:02,679
So how's young Sophie, then?
311
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:04,838
Still feel a bit sick in the mornings.
312
00:13:05,800 --> 00:13:06,949
I sometimes get that.
313
00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:08,234
I don't know what it is.
314
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:11,679
I find the best thing is
to actually just be sick.
315
00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:15,558
It's good you're getting out
to the supermarket
316
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:17,154
for a wee breath of fresh air.
317
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:20,268
She went into the town yesterday
as well, didn't you?
318
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:21,949
Yeah.
319
00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:23,433
She needed a bigger bra.
320
00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:26,635
Say no more.
Personal information.
321
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:29,116
Hmm. There's a hell of a weight in them.
322
00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,554
- Mum.
- What?
323
00:13:36,560 --> 00:13:37,709
I'm busy, what is it?
324
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:45,156
- Are you sure?
- Yes, I'm sure.
325
00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:50,195
Jaz.
326
00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:51,669
Are you in there?
327
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:54,758
Have you made a mess?
328
00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:00,989
Hands up, who's been to the Carvery?
329
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:03,071
Oh, we've been several times,
haven't we, Cath?
330
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:08,118
Eric. You been?
331
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:10,191
Er, not for a while, no.
332
00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:12,589
I took Sophie on her birthday, didn't I?
333
00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:13,669
Oh, don't.
334
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:15,432
She had a bit of everything,
335
00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:17,192
the lamb, beef,
336
00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,633
- pork, turkey.
- (SIGHS)
337
00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:20,551
- Turkey can be dry.
- CHRISTINE: Aye.
338
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:22,437
You had the gravy though,
didn't you, Sophie?
339
00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:24,592
Oh, Cath likes gravy, don't you?
340
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:27,276
She pours it on her Yorkshire pudding.
(CHUCKLES)
341
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:29,199
Do you, Cathy?
342
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:38,113
Jaz!
343
00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:40,474
Jaz!
344
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:42,589
What's going on?
345
00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:44,995
We think Jaz has locked himself
in the toilet.
346
00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:46,354
Oh, has he?
347
00:14:46,880 --> 00:14:48,632
Let me have a little word with him.
348
00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:52,948
Jaz, get out! I need to pee and if I
piss my pants you're clearing it up.
349
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:54,628
Cathy!
350
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:56,119
What on earth is the matter with him?
351
00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:58,472
He's worried about
going back to work tomorrow.
352
00:14:58,840 --> 00:14:59,989
Jaz.
353
00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:01,559
Are you stressed?
354
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:03,074
Are you panicking?
355
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:06,036
Are you having a panic attack?
356
00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:08,636
Are you having a breakdown?
357
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:11,435
I tell you what.
358
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:12,669
I'm getting a bit peckish.
359
00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:14,508
I'll go and check the meat.
360
00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,830
Aye. Go and have a look
and see how it's doing.
361
00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:18,595
Oh, here, Eric.
362
00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:20,956
Did she say it was
roast potatoes she was doing?
363
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:22,029
Aye.
364
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:24,231
Any chance you have a wee bit of mash?
365
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:27,676
I like a bit of mash to mop up my gravy.
366
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,996
Oh, aye, mash, lovely.
367
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,069
Eric!
368
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,232
Could I have a bit of mash, too?
369
00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:35,875
What about your chips?
370
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,395
Oh, go on, I'll have chips as well.
371
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:42,837
At least speak to me
so I know you're all right?
372
00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:44,429
(WHISPERING) Beth!
373
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:46,232
Get a ladder up and have a look in.
374
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,429
No!
375
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:50,478
Remember you did that when you thought
Eric was masturbating in the afternoons?
376
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:55,753
We'll need to batter the door down.
377
00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,070
We are not battering the door down.
378
00:15:58,680 --> 00:15:59,669
Jaz!
379
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:01,591
Just let us know you're all right.
380
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:05,235
Oh.
381
00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:07,358
We didn't know what was going on.
382
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:09,870
Yes, Jaz, you stupid little shit.
383
00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:11,993
BETH: Cathy, down the stairs.
384
00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:15,152
Beth, see the potatoes, is it all right
if I have the tiny roast ones?
385
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:16,753
Ugh, do you want chips as well?
386
00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,559
No, not chips!
387
00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:20,710
Little square ones
like you get in Spain,
388
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:22,029
patatas, they're called.
389
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:23,593
Patatas, potatoes!
390
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:25,028
What's the matter?
391
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:28,033
I can't go back to work tomorrow.
392
00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:35,591
- What's going on?
- It's fine, it's nothing.
393
00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:37,989
It's nothing, Colin.
Some things are private, actually.
394
00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,273
I thought wee Jaz
might be having a breakdown.
395
00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:45,831
- He is, aye.
- Look, he's not having a breakdown.
396
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,035
Just a wee one.
397
00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:51,029
Oh, I've said from the day
that I met that boy,
398
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,316
that I could just picture him
being sectioned.
399
00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:55,828
Is he OK, Mrs Baird?
400
00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:57,268
He's fine, Sophie.
401
00:16:57,520 --> 00:16:58,873
Are you getting him taken away, are you?
402
00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:01,872
No! Nobody's getting "taken away".
403
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:03,871
He just needed a couple
of minutes to himself.
404
00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:08,630
It's when they start shaving
their heads, like Britney Spears.
405
00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:11,076
Jaz would really suit
having his head shaved.
406
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:12,515
Cathy!
407
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:14,670
Sophie, would you like Jaz
to shave his head?
408
00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:18,431
Jaz is not going to shave his head,
Cathy, now that's enough.
409
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,074
He's fine.
410
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,358
He just gets a bit uptight.
411
00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:26,035
And the last thing he needs is
for us lot to be going on about it,
412
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:28,511
so can we just let it go, OK?
413
00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:31,429
OK?
414
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:35,628
I'll tell ya something.
415
00:17:36,120 --> 00:17:37,519
Another half an hour of this
416
00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:40,273
and she could snap
like a fucking twig herself.
417
00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:46,639
You can just go if you want.
418
00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:47,994
- No, I'm fine.
- You sure?
419
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:49,195
Yeah.
420
00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:50,795
Better off here.
421
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:52,552
Keeps my mind off things,
being around people,
422
00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:53,834
chatting and stuff. (CHUCKLES)
423
00:17:58,080 --> 00:17:59,752
Oh, hi, Jaz.
424
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:01,275
In ya come, Jaz.
425
00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,237
Ah, there's Jaz, my wee pal.
426
00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,835
Come on, you, and sit next to me, son.
427
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:08,551
Oh, there you go.
428
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:12,518
COLIN: This is nice, Jaz, eh?
429
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:15,230
Everybody getting together
and sitting down.
430
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:16,869
Waiting on the potatoes.
431
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,039
Would you like
a drink of something, Jaz?
432
00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:21,879
Eh...
433
00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:23,109
Just a glass of water, please.
434
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:24,713
Ah, that's good, son.
435
00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,600
Just because you cannae face reality,
436
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,115
does not mean that
you have to hit the bottle.
437
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:34,398
That was good of Ian
getting ya a vegetarian meal, eh, Jaz?
438
00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:36,079
- Oh.
- Aye.
439
00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:39,273
- Sophie, remember you tried it.
- Yeah.
440
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,790
Oh, I mind of that, eh?
441
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:46,711
I was away getting her a nut roast
and peppers stuffed with cheese.
442
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,834
The first time I sat down
to eat a steak pie,
443
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,229
she was circling
my chair like a vulture.
444
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:55,274
I've often thought of
going vegetarian myself.
445
00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:57,112
Don't talk shit.
446
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,953
I have.
There's lots of vegetables I like.
447
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:02,392
I like peas, I like carrots.
448
00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:03,669
I like sweet corn.
449
00:19:04,120 --> 00:19:06,759
Christ, who do you think you are,
the Hungry Fucking Caterpillar.
450
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,349
(LAUGHING AWKWARDLY)
451
00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:13,109
(GIGGLING NERVOUSLY)
452
00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:20,313
Don't tell me he's losing it again.
453
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,718
Pierce the film on this shepherd's pie
and stick it in the microwave.
454
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:27,273
- Who's having this?
- Jaz.
455
00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:34,193
Right, get everyone sat down.
456
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:39,632
Right folks, that's us. Grub's up.
457
00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:40,955
Oh, lovely, Eric.
458
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:42,029
Will you manage, Sophie?
459
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:44,670
Oh, she'll be fine
but I'll need a wee pull-up, here, Ian.
460
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,069
Come on, that's it, son.
461
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:48,791
Ready for a nice, big meal,
are you, Sophie?
462
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:50,195
I'm not really hungry.
463
00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:51,349
Ooh.
464
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,078
Cathy. You and Colin go there.
465
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,351
No, no, no, no.
I'm gonna sit next to Sophie.
466
00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:57,709
Where will I go?
467
00:19:58,480 --> 00:19:59,595
Next to Christine.
468
00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:04,240
Sophie. Anything I don't want,
I'll shove onto your plate, yeah?
469
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:07,712
Clear all this shite out of the way.
470
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,558
'Cause I like to lean right in.
471
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:12,558
Ah, smell that lamb.
472
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:13,869
Do you smell it, Christine?
473
00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,358
Smell that lamb!
474
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:17,955
Indeed I do.
475
00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:19,029
You smell it, Ian?
476
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:20,389
Aye.
477
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:21,913
Hey, Jaz, smell that...
478
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:23,869
Oh, sorry.
479
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:25,075
Right, here we are.
480
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:26,832
- Hey, hey!
- Oh.
481
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,479
Just, er, help yourselves.
482
00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:33,754
BETH: OK.
483
00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:34,829
Cathy.
484
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:36,519
You'll take roast?
485
00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:38,079
Yes, please, missus.
486
00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:39,429
BETH: Er, Colin?
487
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:41,192
Mash and three roast, Beth.
488
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:44,553
BETH: Mash and three roast.
COLIN: There we go.
489
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:46,154
Christine, your chips.
490
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:50,074
Oh, just give me them here, I'll just
scrape them all onto my plate, er...
491
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:52,193
Any vinegar, Beth?
492
00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:53,269
Eric, vinegar.
493
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:57,312
Oh, Eric, any mint sauce?
494
00:20:58,480 --> 00:20:59,959
- (CLEARS THROAT)
- Sophie?
495
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,270
Just a tiny bit for me,
Mrs Baird, honestly.
496
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,518
- (MICROWAVE BEEPS)
- Er, Eric, microwave.
497
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:07,394
- CHRISTINE: Thank you, Eric.
- Ian?
498
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:08,709
Just some boiled.
499
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,472
I'll take a couple of boiled as well.
500
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:12,308
COLIN: Mmm. Beth.
501
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,989
This mash is lovely.
502
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:17,669
Hmm. I'll take some mash and all.
503
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:20,919
Oh, there ya go.
504
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,554
Personal service, eh?
505
00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:25,235
Your own personal pie man waiting on ya.
(CHUCKLES)
506
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:29,875
Oh, yuck!
507
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,236
Oh gads, that is so gross!
508
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,280
Look at it, Sophie. Look at that.
509
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,871
- No, you're all right.
- COLIN: Is it meant to look like that?
510
00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:40,992
That is just muck!
511
00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:44,392
Three-and-a-half minutes it said
and that's what I gave it.
512
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:46,273
It's fine, Mrs Baird.
513
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:49,195
- Are you sure?
- Yeah. Honestly.
514
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:50,349
CHRISTINE: You enjoy it, son.
515
00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:53,399
You'll be back locked in that loo
before you know it. (CHUCKLES)
516
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,038
Right. Has everybody got?
517
00:21:56,120 --> 00:21:57,109
Right. Sorted.
518
00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:58,555
Lovely.
519
00:21:58,640 --> 00:21:59,629
In fact,
520
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:01,752
why don't I do a wee toast?
521
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,353
Why don't you not bother?
522
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,990
Thanks, eh, to... to Beth and Eric.
523
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:13,872
For not only these beautiful potatoes
that you have sourced for us,
524
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:17,669
but also, the magnificent leg of lamb,
which I think we'd all agree
525
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:19,113
is absolutely delicious.
526
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:21,836
Well, not you, Jaz, because,
well, you've got pie, but...
527
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:24,433
Take it from me, son,
528
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:25,839
this is melt-in-your-mouth stuff.
529
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:30,229
So, here's to you, Beth and Eric.
530
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:32,391
- Eric and Beth!
- (ALL TOASTING)
531
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:36,436
Oh, and good luck to Jaz
on his first day back at work tomorrow.
532
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:37,635
ALL: Jaz!
533
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:40,152
Eh, he's not going.
534
00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:42,029
Oh.
535
00:22:42,120 --> 00:22:43,439
Well, er...
536
00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:44,873
Well, good luck...
537
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:48,278
Back at the doctor's,
trying to get your sick note.
538
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:51,913
ALL: Cheers.
539
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:56,918
Well this is nice, isn't it?
540
00:22:57,640 --> 00:22:59,278
Nice getting everybody together.
541
00:22:59,360 --> 00:23:01,635
- Traditional Sunday lunch, eh?
- Exactly.
542
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:06,068
See, when I was a wee boy,
543
00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:08,678
see, no matter what was going on,
544
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:12,629
we all sat down together
on a Sunday, with a bit of meat,
545
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:14,195
few potatoes,
546
00:23:14,280 --> 00:23:15,713
and a bit of pudding for afters.
547
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:18,836
There's plenty of potatoes
if anybody wants.
548
00:23:19,360 --> 00:23:20,952
- We should do this more often, eh?
- Mmm.
549
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:23,555
Oh, well.
Your turn next then, eh, Cathy?
550
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:24,834
Fuck that.
551
00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:27,909
All right.
552
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:30,518
What is the matter with you?
553
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:32,519
- Who, me?
- No.
554
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:36,913
The other torn-faced cow that's sucking
on a leccy fag behind you.
555
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:38,035
Aye, you!
556
00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:40,634
- Christine.
- Ah, well no wonder, Beth.
557
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:42,672
She's been cutting about here
558
00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:44,637
with a face like a smacked arse
the whole day!
559
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,036
- Excuse me?
- Cathy, just don't.
560
00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:48,792
It's all right, Beth. It's all right.
561
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:52,150
I'm sorry, Christine,
if I am not my usual
562
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:53,754
cheery self today.
563
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,350
But I happen to be dealing
with a personal matter
564
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,074
and that's how it shall remain.
565
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:00,149
Personal.
566
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,071
- What happened?
- He's been at the lap-dancing!
567
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:11,589
Oh.
568
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:13,035
Now, hang on.
569
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:15,518
- Dirty dog.
- Mmm.
570
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,272
Dirty wee dog.
571
00:24:17,360 --> 00:24:18,759
Look, it's not how it sounds.
572
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:20,432
Oh, is it not?
573
00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:21,839
Nothing happened!
574
00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:23,797
Oh! You forget your wallet?
575
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:26,196
Maybe now's not the time
to go through this?
576
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:29,513
He said he was on a golf club night out
and then...
577
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,992
On Facebook, he was tagged in a picture
578
00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:34,753
in a lap-dancing club.
579
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:40,157
Oh, I can just see him with the boobs
in the face, grinning away.
580
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,909
- So gross.
- Hey, Beth,
581
00:24:43,360 --> 00:24:44,588
see, Pat over the back,
582
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:47,269
her nephew went
to one of them at Aberdeen,
583
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,632
�75 for a can of Red Bull
584
00:24:51,080 --> 00:24:53,548
and a dry hump off
a wee lassie in a denim skirt.
585
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,194
No, no, no, look, it wasn't like that.
586
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:58,313
It was actually...
587
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,675
Well, it was actually
quite a classy place.
588
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:02,434
- What's it called?
- Sliders.
589
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:03,509
(GASPING)
590
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:06,512
Look, why don't we just have our dinner
and leave this?
591
00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:08,155
I can't eat!
592
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,231
Here, Sophie, get me her meat over.
593
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:13,919
It's not that big a deal, is it?
594
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,871
Erm, pardon?
595
00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,675
It's not like it's nothing
that you can't see anywhere else.
596
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:22,550
I mean, if you're on a beach
and people are topless,
597
00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:23,749
do you know what I mean?
598
00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:24,869
Exactly, Ian!
599
00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:27,748
I mean, Eric, you've seen
topless women at the beach?
600
00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:28,829
Well, I...
601
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:30,399
And there's nothing sexual
about it, is there?
602
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:31,834
No, no! I...
603
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:33,275
(STAMMERING) It's just quite...
604
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:36,357
What, it's like a wee bonus.
605
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,074
COLIN: Look. We were all out.
606
00:25:40,160 --> 00:25:41,991
It was one of the boy's birthdays.
607
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:43,957
The pubs were shutting
and a few of the lads
608
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:45,189
fancied going somewhere else.
609
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:47,596
It was just a bit of a laugh.
610
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,154
"A bit of a laugh".
611
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:51,436
So you're telling me you just went
and sat there, had a drink
612
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:52,789
and that was it?
613
00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:54,349
Well...
614
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:55,589
Well, all right, I mean I...
615
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:57,792
I had a dance thing.
616
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,235
Ah! Here we go.
617
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,716
- What dance?
- Well...
618
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:05,356
We were just chatting, and well,
619
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:08,318
the next thing I knew,
well, I turn round and...
620
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:11,153
At first, I actually though the lassie
had dropped something.
621
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:13,074
- What!
- But Cathy...
622
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:15,758
Cathy, listen. The thing is...
623
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:17,789
Nothing happened.
624
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:20,917
Oh, you must think I am stupid.
625
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:21,989
I'm telling ya,
626
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,589
nothing happened, as in...
627
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,353
- Nothing happened!
- Oh.
628
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,358
Like, nothing happened!
629
00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:33,839
- Didn't it?
- No!
630
00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:36,633
That only happens when it's...
631
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:42,359
It only happens, when it's you and me.
632
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:43,429
(GROANS)
633
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:49,434
- Really?
- Aye.
634
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:51,039
- Honestly?
- Yes.
635
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:55,673
Oh, Col!
636
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:00,159
Colin. (SOBS)
637
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:03,195
Not even a semi?
638
00:27:04,720 --> 00:27:05,709
No.
639
00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:10,199
(GIGGLING)
640
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:13,956
Oh, this is the best Sunday ever!
641
00:27:14,280 --> 00:27:15,679
Beth! Go and get us a bottle of wine.
642
00:27:16,120 --> 00:27:18,759
Actually, fuck it, I'll go.
643
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,718
You've been stuck in that shitty
little kitchen all day.
644
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:29,479
(SIGHS) Good.
So we can all get on with our lunch now.
645
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:36,678
Beth! My chips are cold.
Can you heat them up?
646
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:38,229
I don't really like this.
647
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:40,792
? It's gettin' hot in here
648
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:42,672
? So take off all your clothes
- ERIC: Oh, Christ.
649
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:44,751
- There she goes.
? I am getting so hot
650
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,190
? I'm gonna take my clothes off
- Cathy.
651
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:49,032
- (LAUGHING)
? It's getting hot in here
652
00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:51,116
? So let me pour you wine
653
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:54,078
? With a little bit of uh, uh
And a little bit of ah, ah
654
00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:56,272
- Is it starting yet?
- Oh, yes.
655
00:27:56,360 --> 00:27:58,476
Anybody, er, want more
potatoes or anything?
656
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:00,278
? Good gracious, ass is bodacious
657
00:28:00,360 --> 00:28:03,193
- And slut drop!
- (OTHERS CHEERING)
658
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:05,953
? With a little bit of uh, uh
And a little bit of ah, ah
659
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:07,359
Whoo!
660
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:10,591
CATHY: ? Don't you wish
your girlfriend was hot like me?
661
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:12,233
? Don't you wish
your girlfriend was... ?
662
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:13,549
(SOPHIE RETCHING)
663
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,399
(CATHY CONTINUES SINGING)
664
00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:23,269
(SIGHS)
665
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:30,669
Mmm.
666
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:27,200
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
February 2017
667
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:36,200
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
Released on www.Addic7ed.com
668
00:28:36,250 --> 00:28:40,800
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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