All language subtitles for Here.and.Now.2018.S01E08.WEB.H264-DEFLATE[eztv]-eng

Haven't you always wanted me
to be open to the unexplainable?

Farid, I don't know.

It's all just starting
to look a little manic.

You're perceptive.

Do you pick up on anything about me?

You need to destroy
the thing in front of you.

You ready for what's coming?

Hey, what the fuck are you doing?

One word, and this pic goes viral.

We have to destroy Madison
and her fucktard she-goblins.

Do you remember that night
you and I went for beers?

I could've gone home with you
that night, couldn't I?

Are you okay?

I'm fine.

So what do you say,
want to stop by the office?

Ramon.

You dreamed my mother,

and I think I dreamt your birth mother?

Can you go now?

This is very important for my...

Oh, my God. Just get out!

Look, I'm serious.

I don't ever want to see
this guy ever again, okay?

Look, I don't care what you
say, all right? I'm going home.

Sweetie, stay here.

We'll figure it all out together.

You are reliving your thing
with Uncle Ike, all right?

This is different.
I am different, all right?

There's clear evidence
that I have porous mind

and I pick up messages.
What I have to do is...

- figure out what they mean!
- Dr. Shokrani used the word "psychosis."

Some of the things that I have seen

have turned out to be real, okay?

I'm your son, Mom. Why do you
listen to him and not me?

The doctor is very concerned that you

might feel that you...

The doctor sees his life in my game.

Of course he's gonna
wanna keep treating me.

He's not what you think he is, all right?

So fuck him and fuck
his fucking pills, Mom.

You can't just quit the medication.
You have to taper off.

Well, then I'll taper off, but I'm done!

Are we fucking clear?

You shouldn't be alone.
At least call Ashley or Duc.

No! And nobody call me, email
me, or text me, all right?

Just don't fucking bother me!

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

Yup, you're having a flare-up.

I know that. Fix it.

Oh. Wait, you giants of modern
medicine still have no cure.

You can make the blind see
and the deaf hear,

and you can't help me stop shitting?

It's just colitis.

Yes, you have a chronic condition,
but, hey, it's treatable,

it's intermittent, it's not terminal.
You're lucky.

You managing your stress?

I wasn't stressed
till I started shitting.

Oh. Hang on. Duc.

It's simple:

When you have symptoms,
you power down for a while.

No. I refuse to let this stupid disease

keep me from achieving
what I want to achieve.

Okay. Meds: prednisone, Asacol.

Nine massive pills every day...

- Mm-hmm.
- ...for the rest of my life.

- Right.
- It's not fair.

Put your pants on, get outta here.

You're good. Next!

- Hey.
- Oh. I thought you might be Ramon.

- What's going on?
- He refuses to stay with us.

So... irresponsible.

We weren't expecting you.
Is everything okay?

Everything's great.

Uh...

- Peace offering.
- Oh, Ashley.

You didn't have to.

Yeah, I did. You're the only mom I have,

even if you are a white supremacist.

What's this?

Open it.

Mmm.

Wow. You may not choose
them for yourself, but...

Are you kidding?

These are spectacular!

Here, let me...

Hang on. I got it. I got it.

I know you wanted me
to be a social worker,

and you were super
disappointed, but, you know...

a social worker wouldn't get you these.

You still think I look down
on you for what you do?

It's not true.

That's ancient history,

and I'm so proud of you.

Thanks, Mom.

These are the most uncomfortable
shoes I've ever had.

Mm-hmm.

- I love them.
- Oh good.

You look fantastic.

Do I have a place to wear them?

Fuck it. Wear them to Whole Foods.

- Hello.
- Dr. Shokrani.

This is Audrey Bayer.

What's wrong? Is... is Ramon okay?

I don't know. He left.

Can we meet today? Are you
available at one o'clock?

Yeah, of course.

Any luck?

I got... I got sidetracked.

You kept my postcards...

and concert tickets.

We should probably
throw them out, I guess.

Prince at the Warfield. Remember?

I remember everything.

Those are sexy.

Greg.

- Don't.
- Seriously? I can't compliment you?

We know everything
in the adoption file by heart.

Let me see. There must be a sentence...

something, a detail
from the, uh, orphanage,

Saint Laura's.

I can't find anything.

It's weird, you know?

We couldn't even get them on the phone.

We didn't have time to talk.

We had to get him out of there.

Malnutrition, dysentery...

skin infection,
his eyes were full of gunk.

Yeah, but... it's weird.

This is pointless.

Probably, but... If Ramon's not here,

there's no reason for you to stay.

I'm gonna keep looking.

Do what you want.

You're a free man.

Can you be any more self-righteous?

Hey.

Hey, I heard it happened again.

Can't anyone in this family
just leave me alone, man?

Nothing's private. I mean, one second
and everybody fucking knows everything.

Oh, yeah, it's so hard
when people care about you.

Don't be an asshole.

Speaking of assholes, how's yours?

Yeah. Boom. I heard.

You little fucker.

I told them not to adopt you.

Mom still thinks I'm Ike.

They just won't accept
that what I see is real sometimes.

Man, I had to get the fuck outta there.

Well, what are you gonna do?
Do you have a plan?

Kind of. I'm gonna go see Carmen.

- My Carmen?
- Oh, ooh.

Your Carmen?

Ah. Ducy, you like her?

What are you going to her for?
I can help you.

A reading. What do you think?

It's always a competition with you.

Dude, I'm fucking gay.

Ramon, your order's ready.

Hey, um, my hot dog's ready.
I'll call you later. I gotta go.

Hey. Okay, yeah. Don't do
anything that makes me look bad.

Pathetic.

So, um, should I
tell you why I called you?

No, let's just see what I get first.

- Okay.
- Can I hold your hands?

- Oh!
- What? What?

I'm kidding. Intuitive humor.

Funny. Funny.

Gimme... gimme your hands. Come on.

- You caught that?
- The little buzz? Yeah.

That's interesting.

Yeah, I feel fire.

There's energy boiling around you.

Fire and... dreams. Does that make sense?

Yeah, that's exactly
what I wanted to tell you.

The fire could be literal fire,

but it also feels like... creative fire

and it's connected with big changes.

Do you know what I mean
when I say "creative fire"?

Maybe my... my game? Is that it?

Maybe, but I mean that creation
which is also destruction.

When things have to be destroyed

so that they can make way
for something new,

like... like a cocoon.

Don't fight it.

What's happening has to happen.

I certainly can't make it stop.

Tell me about your...

near-death experience.

What?

- Um, I never had one.
- Are you sure?

Look back, because I feel...
I feel strongly

that you crossed over and came back.

If I did, I... I don't...

know anything about it.

You are connected to some
major energetic forces.

It runs in your family...

your family of origin,
and... this goes back...

- way back in time.
- To Colombia.

When you have these dreams,
are you awake?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

This meeting must remain
strictly confidential.

My license could get revoked.

Of course. No one knows I'm here.

What... whatever
information you can share.

I'm willing to take the risk,

because I have tremendous
affection for your son.

I think Ramon's an extraordinary being.

I agree.

So... let's stop these hallucinations.

Should we?

It's possible that his visions...

- Visions?
- ...may contain keys

to unlocking repressed trauma.

From... his childhood?

Or from his infancy.

I also believe Ramon may have
what some call "porous mind."

So he said. What is that?

It's the ability to share information

without being necessarily...

Dr. Shokrani?

Look.

11:11.

Second time today.

Ramon would probably interpret that
as a message from the universe.

You see it that way too?

I definitely see it
as more than a coincidence.

- Mm-hmm.
- Don't you?

It's so obvious.

I'm not sure we'll ever agree about that.

We won't be needing
your services any further.

Excuse me?

Ramon has only gotten worse
since he's been seeing you.

I don't believe you can help my son.

Something is speaking directly to him...
and to me.

Dr. Shokrani, You're not well.

No, Ms. Bayer, you're
choosing to be blind,

and Ramon's the one who will pay.

I suggest you seek help.

Please stay away from Ramon.

Thank you so much.

- Woman Is she... is she the buyer?
- That's Ashley.

- Great. Can I speak with her?
- Sure.

- Um, Ashley, this is Sharon Chen.
- Mm-hmm?

She wanted to meet you.
Do you have a minute?

- Yeah, of course.
- Okay.

- Ashley Collins.
- I'm in love with your boutique.

Oh. I'm in love with your jacket.

Oh. Thank you. It was...
it was a sample sale.

Could I ask you some questions
about your business?

- Sure. Yeah.
- Is it the storefront

that generates most of your profit here?

No, it's mostly a showcase.

The real action happens on the web site.

Oh. So you have a... you have
a strong Internet presence?

We do. We get to know our customers,

help them with styling
and personal shopping.

That's the fun part.

You say, "We," but isn't it you?

Do you do all of this yourself?

Well, Karina is a big help, but yes,

mostly me. It's very impressive.

Um, are you... Excuse me.

Sir, what are you doing? Oh, it's okay.

You'll like this. Black Lives Matter.

I appreciate that, but no thank you.

I'm doing this for you.
Why... No thank you.

Do you have a problem
with being black? It's okay.

I... I just... I have
a problem with people...

sir. Sir, I'm not cool with you walking

into private property and posting
things without permission,

but I do appreciate your support.

I'm standing with your people.

What kind of bullshit
self-loathing Nazi are you?

- You need to leave now.
- Careful.

You make me sick to my stomach.

I need... Get out, now.

Race traitor!

We got a race traitor here, everybody!

Yeah, I'm gonna make sure
everybody knows about it too.

You disgust me.

Read it.

The waking dreams...

are they a real thing?

Do they happen to other people?

Oh, yeah. It's documented by Aristotle,

but with you, I feel your
dreams have purpose.

You have a purpose.

You're seeing some sort of truth or
messages in these symbols, right?

Everybody's symbology is different,

so what do the symbols mean to you?

I don't know.

I almost know, and then they just...
slip away.

Yeah, 'cause your head's full of shit.

Thank you.

I can't read a clear thought from you,

and I'm usually pretty good at that.

You meditate?

No. No, no, no, no.

Mmm. Try.

It'll help you listen to yourself

and... to whatever's coming in.

Okay.

The answers are in you, Ramon. You're it.

You can figure them out.

I will.

- Hey, buddy.
- Yeah?

I'm making salmon cakes.
Come over for dinner tonight.

Too busy. Thanks, but no.

We're talking about an hour. You don't
have an hour to come hang with us?

Nope. Sorry.

Client's here. Gotta go.

Those are some shoes.

A gift from my daughter.

You're beautiful.

Oh stop.

Do I have to?

Is there something...?

Oh. Yeah. Big news.

You heard from the governor?

He signed off. We're out
to 10 more school districts.

Already?

Isn't that premature?

We should test on a small scale first.

- This is small scale.
- Steve.

Audrey. Look, I love
the Empathy Initiative.

It's such a beautiful thing. It's the
right project at the right time,

and we need to get it out there

for you and for everybody
as soon as we can.

We need this.

I'm very grateful
that you brought it here.

You don't have to flatter me.

No, I'm not flattering you.

You always think
I'm trying to flatter you.

You still don't see
how big this can be, do you?

I do see, but if there
are problems anywhere,

we should take care of them first.

We find the problems
through implementation, okay?

The more we explore, the better.

Refine as we go.

Seems kind of backwards...

but I get your point.
Do you get my point?

I do, I do. We'll go through
this with a fine-tooth comb,

- before it goes any further.
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

- This is fun.
- Yeah.

Sassy.

It's Duc.

It's Duc. Is...

- Hello?
- Carmen.

Hey... it's Duc!

- Bayer-Boatwright.
- Duc!

What's going on?

Oh, nothing. You didn't
sense I would call?

Mmm. Heckling the intuitive?

Aren't we past that?

Uh, wait, no, no, sorry.

I don't know why that just
fell out of my mouth.

Um... sorry.

What are you doing?

Oh, I'm just... bookkeeping.

So thrilling.

What are you doing?

I'm just wondering

if you felt like...

doing something, maybe going somewhere...

with me, of course.

That sounds pretty general.

Sorry, I... I can be specific.

Um...

Hike this afternoon?

Unless you don't like hikes,

or afternoons, or this afternoon is bad.

Yes, hike.

Yes, this afternoon.

Yes, you.

Wanna pick me up?

Um, yes!

Uh, yeah, I don't want you to pick me up.

I'm good at picking up.

Uh, I drive a Tesla.

Congratulations.

Um, okay. Uh, all right.
I'll pick you up.

- Okay. All right.
- Three o'clock?

Okay. Okay, bye.

Ahem. I'm a fucking genius.

Tell me.

Do you know what silver nitrate

and sun exposure does to the skin?

Dad.

- Hey.
- What?

I, uh, was at New Seasons.

I picked up a few things for you.

Oh, man, that is so cool. Thanks, Dad.

- All right, bye.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.

You wanna come over for dinner at
the house tonight? I'm cooking.

I can't. I'm busy. Yeah, but thanks, Dad.

- All right? Okay, bye.
- Oh, hold on, hold on.

Look what I found in the basement.

One of your flipbooks.

Remember your flipbook phase?

- Yeah.
- You were, like, eight or nine.

Pretty cool, huh?

Thanks, Dad.

Come on, come over for dinner.

I... I... I can't, Dad.

I'm actually busy, but, um...

Hey.

Um, I didn't...

I didn't realize you were entertaining.

Yeah, I kind of told you so.

All right. Bye, Dad.

Hey, you're good at this.

Oh, you thought I was

a fragile flower?

No, we're from Portland, dude.
This is what we do.

- We hike.
- Bike. Yeah, we ski.

We kayak. We climb rocks.

Uh... water break. I know
this trail like the back...

Oh. You feel okay?

Of course.

So, you're seeing Ramon?

Am I?

- He's my brother.
- Right.

Do you talk about your clients?

No, so he is one of your clients.

I can't remember.

- Hey. You don't feel okay.
- No, it's... it's nothing.

It's nothing. It's just... Excuse me.
I... Hey.

- We can go back.
- No, no, no, no!

Aah...

Okay, so you map out the escape route,

and I'll lock down
the silver nitrate solution.

Uh, I think it should be
the other way around.

- It's my idea.
- It's my swastika.

I don't know how to read maps.

Look, you better not get this wrong.

- I don't want to go to jail.
- I've been.

It's really not that bad.

You know, there are hundreds
of millions of neurons

connecting the brain
to the digestive system.

- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm,

but in Japan, the belly, the hara,

is considered the seat of the soul...

and it's... the source

of all of our spiritual
and physical power.

Uh-huh.

Duc, we're human. We have
bodily functions. It's nothing.

Easy for you to say.

You're not the one with your
ass in the undergrowth.

While you were pooping, I farted.

Does that help?

Yes, a little.

Do you honestly think

I think less of you
because of your intestines?

I don't know. Ah, I don't know.

I don't know what you think of me.

You make me nervous.

I... I spaz out around you
like a high-school freshman.

I mean, don't you see it?
Can't you sense it?

I'm not... that wasn't
a lame psychic joke.

- It was...
- Okay, look.

Don't you know why I'm here?

Maybe you feel sorry for me.

No! Duc...

Okay, I think you are...

physically...

beautiful.

I think you're very interesting

with a million moving parts
and contradictions, and...

I was so happy
when you called, because...

I would get to know you better.

Um...

Okay, your turn.

Oh, motherfucker.

Uh...

Watch out! There's a drop-off.

What?
- Oh! Oh!

Jesus. Duc, are you okay?

Yeah.

Okay, I've got rope. I'm gonna
tie it off and you can climb up.

I... I can't. My foot.
Ah. Son of a bitch.

Hang on. I got a signal a few miles back.

I'm gonna go get help, okay?

Okay.

Aah!

You again? This is the fifth time today.

You're like a magnet.

You keep pulling me in.

It's all in your head.

Mmm. Not my head.

That's...

What?

Stop laughing at me.

I'm... I'm laughing at us.

Dinner. Tonight.

My place.

Yes.

- Are you coming with him?
- Of course.

- No.
- Are you fucking kidding me?

Take my keys and drive my car back.

- Malcolm will come pick it up.
- No, we'll get it later.

Carmen, please. This is ridiculous.

- You're pissing me off.
- Sorry.

I'll meet you at the
hospital and take you home.

No, I'm good. Thanks, anyway.

Will you stop?

Time to go.

Duc, don't do this.

We're en route now, ETA...

- Alterna-mitzvah?
- Yeah.

What? Mom makes up rituals, so can I.

- I think it's very creative.
- Thank you.

- And we're celebrating...?
- Moi.

The one you left behind.

Kristen, we see you all the time.

Yeah, but you don't see me, see me.

Look, all you have to do is just
show up and say something nice.

Is that so much to ask?

You've reached Audrey. Leave a message.

Audrey, I made family dinner.

Um, we're waiting for you,

but it's getting cold,
so we're gonna eat.

You should call me back.

- Hey, we'll clean that up later.
- You will.

Why? 'Cause I cooked?

Well, yeah.

This is not a business deal.

This dinner is a gift from me to you.

You don't have to do anything in return.

- Score!
- I know I don't have to.

I want to...

as my gift from me to you.

There's too many transactions
in relationships.

"I'll do this for you
if you do this for me.

If you cook, I'll clean."
It's just so fucking Western.

Listen, this meal is a token of love.

You don't owe me anything for it.

I swear I know I don't owe you.

Tell you what you can do.

- What?
- Talk to me.

- How was your day?
- Hmm.

Uh... well, oh shit.

Today, um...

I found myself at the crossroads
of American weirdness.

A flaming white liberal

attacked me in my own store...

for turning down
a "Black Lives Matter" sign.

We're all doomed.

- Seriously.
- Mmm. Maybe not.

What the hell kind
of future will Hailey have?

Keeps me up at night.

Yeah, no. No babies for me.

I will not bring a kid into
a world this fucked up.

Well, you know...

the world has always lived
on the point of extinction.

Safety has always been an illusion.

All right. My parents grew
up during World War II.

They lived through it.
80 million people died.

Two million died in Vietnam, and
your mom and I lived through that.

It felt like the whole
world was exploding.

There were riots in the street,

bombings, lies from our government.

Yeah, but it's not the same.

I mean, it's way worse
now that it's ever been.

Maybe. Yeah. It's not an

academic abstraction, Dad.

I completely agree. It's
isn't abstract or academic.

- It is real.
- Mm-hmm.

But it's history. It's the way life is.

Periodically, the human race
faces absolute disaster...

medically, politically, environmentally.

Unfortunately for us...

I believe we are living
in one of those periods.

So, what the fuck are we supposed
to do about it?

I don't know. I've been struggling
with that myself. I don't know.

I suppose we... just keep going.

We, uh...

We try to be good to each other.

- We have a little hope.
- Have dinner with Dad.

- Yeah.
- Ugh.

Optimism. I can't do it.

Well, it's either that or...

spiritual death and armed insurrection.

Cheers.

Come on, Farid.

You love Lebanese food.

For two hours, can we just
enjoy our lives? Hmm?

Not gonna kill you.

Smile.

Bunny rabbit.

Hi. We have a reservation.
Shokrani, for two.

Excellent.

I hate to ask, Mrs. Shokrani,

but would you consider
removing your scarf?

Huh?

It's for everyone's safety.

Farid. Her scarf has
nothing to do with anyone's safety.

There was an incident.

I'm very sorry, but we
just want to make sure

all our guests are
relaxed and comfortable.

Oh, including racists.

No. It's okay.

No, it's not okay.

This is bullshit.

This is bullshit intolerance.

- Please, sir.
- I'm leaving.

This is fucking cowardice.

Cowardice!

What the hell is wrong with you?

What, do you expect me to put up
with this self-hating bullshit?

He's just trying to protect his business.

Is this the person you wanna be,

a woman who takes off her beliefs
the minute they ask her to?

This isn't about me or my beliefs.

You... explode at the smallest thing.

Hey, do you think this was small?

I was scared when you
put your hands on me.

- Don't be absurd.
- I was scared for me,

and I was scared for you, Farid.

If you saw this behavior
in one of your patients,

- what would you say?
- I'd say, "Hand this guy a medal."

No, you would up his medication.

You know what I like about you?

Everything, I hope.

Mmm.

You're not scared of me.

You know what I like about you?

You're scary.

Mmm!

You're too far away.

- So she threw him out?
- I think so, for the night.

There was, like, a huge
fight, a lot of yelling.

I bet Mom just went off the deep end

about some tiny, stupid thing.

Enough. You guys are
too tough on your mother.

I'm just saying she overreacts.

She gets overinvolved.

She over-everything's.

That's kind of her thing.

- Why aren't you harder on me?
- You're the opposite.

Yeah, she's like two inches away,

and you're, like, way down the block.

Kristen, come help with the kitchen.

_

No, no, no, no.

- It might be the kids.
- Oh.

_

_

Wake up.

It's late.

Are you planning on doing anything today?

I'm already awake. Where are you going?

I am going to work,

then I'm going to the Moon Mart
to pick up things for Amir,

even though I don't have time
and he's your uncle.

The Moon Mart?

- I dreamt of that place.
- Wow!

I'm sure that's super meaningful.

I'll go.

Are you joking? You hate that place.

No, no, I'm gonna go.

There's a list on the fridge.

So, what, you're not wearing
your scarf anymore?

Oh my God.

This is what they want!

For you to live in fear.

For us to police ourselves.

What hypocrisy! You hate the scarf!

Oh fuck.

- Yeah?
- What's up, Ducy!

Can you come pick me up?

Maybe we can go to the dark spot tonight?

What the hell is a dark spot?

I have to brush my teeth.

Kristen's in the other bathroom.

I'll be done in a few minutes.

I'm running late for class.

Fine, whatever.

I slept with Steve.

Clearly.

You know... revenge, it's cheap.

Feels pretty good.

At first.

They Instagrammed a second ago.

They're at the pool!

You know, if we get caught, we're fucked.

It's not like we're hurting them.

They actually want darker skin,

so we're kind of helping them.

But you're sure
it's the right concentrate?

- 'Cause if it's too much...
- Yes!

- You ready?
- Shit.

Yeah.

You took down all the pictures
of you wearing that, right?

Yes. Of course.
That's the first thing I did.

Oh, look, farm animals.

Super cute, whoever you are.

Uh-huh! Whoo!

- Oh yes! Come on!
- Nice.

Oh, where you going?

- Bye.
- Okay.

- Bye!
- Mwah!

- Losers.
- We'll miss ya.

Good. Nice.

Confidence, speed, aggression. Nice.

Use those natural reflexes.

Just remember, simultaneous
attack and defense.

Nice. You're up. Come on.

Let's go. Good.

Nice.

Ooh.

That's progress.

- Nothing. It should've worked by now.
- Shh.

Wait for it.

Oh, shit.

- Fuck!
- What did you do with this shit?

What are you talking about?

Fuck you! What the fuck is happening?

Why are you saying, "Fuck you,"

- to me, you bitch?
- Look at this!

No, this isn't happening!

Oh my God! I fucking told you!

- What?
- I told you.

We actually did it.

- We gotta go.
- Oh yeah, yeah, turn this car on.

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

Shit!

What are you talking about?
You're doing great.

You kept your shit together
with the lunatic.

You didn't freeze up.

Krav Maga is working.
You're too impatient.

It's not enough,

because that guy was aggressively close.

And especially if Hailey's around.

Well, you know where I stand.

Yes.

I'm going to meet my club
at the range for practice.

You wanna come?

What kind of club?

Women who want to protect themselves.

We're not the only ones.

You're supposed to
be in meetings all day.

Mmm.

- It's lovely.
- You're lovely.

Not here.

So...

Uh, uh... okay, okay.

This is the professional me
talking to the professional you.

I want to put you on TV,

so you can promote
the Empathy Initiative.

That is a terrible idea.

They used me. I'm not gonna
let that happen again.

Well, I wouldn't let that
happen either, but I watched.

You're incredibly effective
in front of a camera,

and you cut through
that TV crap like a knife.

You could tell the whole world

about all the good we're doing
at the Benjamin Foundation,

and you could announce
the Empathy Initiative

at the same time.

I'll think about it.

Don't worry. I...

I have your back.

I know you do.

I'm done being professional.

- Tonight, will you...
- Yes.

- We could go out to dinner...
- I don't care. Yes.

Get out of my office.

I'm sorry.

Albert Camus,

Myth of Sisyphus.

You read it. What do you got?

Anything?

Questions?

Huh?

Justin.

Will you read the first
two sentences, please?

"There is but one truly serious
philosophical problem.

"And that is suicide.

"Judging whether life is
or is not worth living

amounts to answering the fundamental
question of philosophy."

All right, well...

...somebody give me one good reason

I shouldn't pull this trigger.

No.

Don't! Please!

Don't! Don't! Man: No, no, no, no.

'Cause it's a toy.

- Exactly!
- Oh jeez.

Because it's a toy.

It's an... an air pistol.

BBs. Not loaded.

See? Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Ahh.

That was evil.

You're fucking crazy.

Not crazy. Absurd.

Camus tells us that if we are aware

that life is futile and chaotic,

then dying is as meaningless as living.

If we accept the absurdity
of our existence,

if we willingly toil up that mountain,

day after day, pushing
that rock up, knowing...

that it will tumble back down...

and that we will do this,

again and again, for eternity...

- what does that make us?
- Idiots.

Doomed.

Heroic.

Yes, exactly. Thank you, Julia.

We become...

the absurdist hero...

seeking meaning we know is not there,

living life to its fullest...

in the face

of a consistent
and continuous struggle...

and inevitable failure.

- Take some time off.
- Oh, come on.

It was clearly a toy.

The students thought you were
about to blow your head off.

It was a prop. It was drama.

These kids walk around
with their eyes open,

but they're sound asleep.

Today at least they woke up.

They were curious.
They used their brains.

They engaged.

You've been exhibiting erratic behavior

for some time, Greg.

The conference, the class where
you said philosophy is bullshit,

encouraging them to punch Nazis.

- Well, yeah.
- And now, in today's political climate

where shooters are active on campuses

and young people fear for their lives...

you show up with a gun.

Well... not the best judgment.
I'll admit that.

You're on six months' leave of absence.

Get your shit together.

Six months' leave?

What a gift.

- You're Farid Shokrani?
- Yeah.

Your uncle used to own this store?

Yeah, we lived upstairs.

Could you wait here a second?

I found this in the basement,

things your uncle left behind.

This is junk.

I don't want it.

I have enough to throw out on my own.

Take it anyway. You never know.

Debit or credit?

You loaded the magazine?

Yeah. Uh, it's hard. I wrecked a nail.

Magazine in the gun?

Rack the slide.

And adjust your grip.

Relax your shoulders.

This thing is clunky and heavy.

You get used to it.

- Aim low. That Glock will kick.
- Mm-hmm.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Breathe out...

and squeeze the trigger.

- You hit the target.
- Nice.

No, no! Don't touch!

We speak English in this house.

Why can't I answer the phone?

Because...

these are bad men calling from Tehran.

They are looking for us.

They're gonna come, take you back

and hurt you. Do you understand?

Don't ever touch that phone.

Mama.

Mommy.

Wow.

I haven't seen a sky
like this in... forever.

If you could not talk,
that would help me not think.

I'm trying to meditate.

What's that supposed to accomplish?

- What are you looking for?
- I don't know.

An answer. A sign.
I knew it on my way out here,

- but you beat it out of me, Duc.
- Baby.

You're such a bully.

You feel that?

What the fuck?

Was that an earthquake?

We should go home.

No, hey, let's just hang here
for a little bit. Please.

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