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Previously on "American Princess"...
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00:00:02,212 --> 00:00:03,618
We're engaged!
3
00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:05,421
Maybe it is time to grow up.
4
00:00:05,446 --> 00:00:07,257
How much for a franchise?
5
00:00:07,290 --> 00:00:09,509
Five grand. For that,
you own it, operate it,
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00:00:09,534 --> 00:00:12,187
and get full legal use
of the name Orbs of Fury.
7
00:00:12,212 --> 00:00:13,367
I could be headed home soon.
8
00:00:13,392 --> 00:00:15,398
At least that's what my
family thinks is happening.
9
00:00:15,423 --> 00:00:17,609
Everyone seems to know
what I'm doing next but me.
10
00:00:17,634 --> 00:00:21,148
Uh, you have a message from
the Myron J. Shapiro Agency.
11
00:00:21,173 --> 00:00:23,148
The producers want you
to put a song on tape.
12
00:00:23,173 --> 00:00:24,617
Can you give this to RatCat?
13
00:00:24,988 --> 00:00:27,859
It's a goodbye note so he
knows that I'll be back.
14
00:00:27,884 --> 00:00:29,679
He looked sad this morning.
15
00:00:30,217 --> 00:00:31,601
Love you, Mama!
16
00:00:32,790 --> 00:00:33,796
I like you.
17
00:00:33,821 --> 00:00:36,656
Like, like like, or like... like?
18
00:00:37,351 --> 00:00:38,952
Mm... mm...
19
00:00:38,993 --> 00:00:40,000
Oh!
20
00:01:49,136 --> 00:01:50,937
- When you gonna get your own robe?
- I have one.
21
00:01:50,962 --> 00:01:53,842
I like yours. It's soft
and smells like...
22
00:01:54,711 --> 00:01:55,711
... indie rock.
23
00:01:56,056 --> 00:01:58,172
You know, there's volume
control on those things.
24
00:01:58,213 --> 00:02:00,086
I think there's something
up with your router.
25
00:02:00,111 --> 00:02:02,156
It only pushes texts through
once there's a build-up.
26
00:02:02,181 --> 00:02:04,186
It's not used to city-lady
levels of texting.
27
00:02:04,211 --> 00:02:05,234
It strains the system.
28
00:02:05,259 --> 00:02:07,328
Joanntha strains everyone's system.
29
00:02:09,289 --> 00:02:11,476
- "Water balls"?
- Ah! Right.
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00:02:11,501 --> 00:02:12,501
Thank you.
31
00:02:12,665 --> 00:02:14,383
Please tell me
that's not a doctor's note.
32
00:02:14,408 --> 00:02:15,800
Uh, it's about the Orbs of Fury.
33
00:02:15,825 --> 00:02:18,939
They're like big, uh... water balls.
34
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:20,390
Look, it's shorthand, okay?
35
00:02:20,415 --> 00:02:22,164
- I bought a franchise.
- What about mud?
36
00:02:22,189 --> 00:02:24,771
Oh, I'm still doing mud. Mud and balls.
37
00:02:24,796 --> 00:02:26,164
I'm now Mr. Mudballs.
38
00:02:26,189 --> 00:02:28,655
And just when you started
talking like a grown-up.
39
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,948
Shart's a grown-up. He and Lulu
have a country house in the off-season.
40
00:02:32,250 --> 00:02:33,904
Be nice to have an off-season house.
41
00:02:33,929 --> 00:02:35,588
If a country house
falls in the off-season,
42
00:02:35,613 --> 00:02:36,652
does it make a sound?
43
00:02:38,113 --> 00:02:39,510
It feels good to take a step
44
00:02:39,535 --> 00:02:41,815
in the direction of something
at least, you know?
45
00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:42,846
Good for you.
46
00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,568
Speaking of directions...
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00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:46,338
Ooh!
48
00:02:46,363 --> 00:02:48,260
What about west, with me?
49
00:02:48,285 --> 00:02:50,393
What's west? Is that
a position we haven't tried?
50
00:02:51,074 --> 00:02:52,456
Come to the next faire with me.
51
00:02:53,331 --> 00:02:54,331
Think about it.
52
00:02:54,356 --> 00:02:56,838
Things about the Simi Faire
that are awesome include...
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00:02:57,092 --> 00:02:58,526
Shart bragging about a base tan,
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00:02:58,551 --> 00:03:00,666
getting fried, and us winning bets.
55
00:03:00,691 --> 00:03:03,487
Group trips to Disneyland and
Delilah OD'ing on Dole Whips.
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00:03:03,512 --> 00:03:06,552
Bigger crowds than the Royal,
bigger tips than the Royal.
57
00:03:06,577 --> 00:03:07,970
- Also, me.
- Okay.
58
00:03:07,995 --> 00:03:09,440
Oh! And you haven't lived
59
00:03:09,465 --> 00:03:11,206
until you have tasted
16th-century churros.
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00:03:11,231 --> 00:03:13,229
- I said okay!
- Wait, wait, wait. When? Just now?
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00:03:13,254 --> 00:03:15,682
Yes! Except you were
the one rambling, for a change,
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00:03:15,707 --> 00:03:16,924
which is kind of nice.
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00:03:18,784 --> 00:03:20,786
- Give me my robe back.
- Mm. Come and get it!
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00:03:28,995 --> 00:03:31,721
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
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00:03:34,823 --> 00:03:36,526
- Guess what.
- No!
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00:03:36,551 --> 00:03:37,551
No goodbyes yet.
67
00:03:37,557 --> 00:03:39,659
I hate goodbyes and
endings and leaving things.
68
00:03:39,684 --> 00:03:41,164
No, it's good news.
69
00:03:42,056 --> 00:03:43,148
Oh, my God!
70
00:03:43,173 --> 00:03:44,932
Don't worry. We can raise it
on the circuit together.
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00:03:44,957 --> 00:03:46,524
Lil Boy's always wanted
a younger sibling.
72
00:03:46,549 --> 00:03:48,420
What?! Delilah, no!
73
00:03:48,445 --> 00:03:49,445
Sorry. I assumed.
74
00:03:50,059 --> 00:03:52,456
You guys can't keep your
stinky parts off each other.
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00:03:53,113 --> 00:03:54,788
I'm coming to the Simi Faire.
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00:03:55,383 --> 00:03:56,549
This makes me so happy!
77
00:03:56,574 --> 00:03:58,604
Last weekend coming up, everybody.
78
00:04:02,397 --> 00:04:03,397
All right!
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00:04:04,103 --> 00:04:06,291
Please refrain from fully partying
80
00:04:06,316 --> 00:04:09,127
until the gates close on Sunday.
81
00:04:09,516 --> 00:04:12,284
Also, we have Bo and Jenny's
wedding coming up, so...
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00:04:12,934 --> 00:04:14,057
... all hands on deck.
83
00:04:14,082 --> 00:04:16,405
Are you gonna book a stripper
to officiate this wedding, too?
84
00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:19,221
Will the rice have ants in it again?
85
00:04:19,246 --> 00:04:21,331
Will the doves be able to fly this time?
86
00:04:23,043 --> 00:04:24,804
Ha ha. Very funny.
87
00:04:24,829 --> 00:04:25,829
Ooh!
88
00:04:26,804 --> 00:04:27,804
What?
89
00:04:27,829 --> 00:04:29,065
I can lead the charge
on the wedding planning.
90
00:04:29,090 --> 00:04:31,838
I love details... and parties...
and doves.
91
00:04:31,863 --> 00:04:34,684
Hired. Which is a figure of speech.
There's no money.
92
00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:35,924
So a small reception, then.
93
00:04:35,949 --> 00:04:39,581
No reception. Ceremony,
souvenir mugs, over and out.
94
00:04:39,606 --> 00:04:41,604
It's Bo and Jenny!
They're season ticket holders.
95
00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:43,620
Yeah, we are collecting
the leftover booze
96
00:04:43,645 --> 00:04:45,386
for the end-of-faire campfire.
97
00:04:45,621 --> 00:04:47,807
Oh! What if we just combine the parties?
98
00:04:50,189 --> 00:04:52,526
It would be a great way
to close out the season.
99
00:04:52,551 --> 00:04:54,944
Fine! But still no money for this thing.
100
00:04:54,969 --> 00:04:57,151
Check in with our
resident DJs over there.
101
00:04:57,176 --> 00:04:58,636
They're probably still available.
102
00:04:59,668 --> 00:05:02,362
Wait. Am I DJ DabFreak,
or are you DJ DabFreak?
103
00:05:02,389 --> 00:05:04,366
Me. Wait. Yeah, me.
104
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:06,206
Cool. Then I'll be DeeJer BeeJer.
105
00:05:06,231 --> 00:05:07,667
Dude, why not DJ BeeJay?
106
00:05:07,692 --> 00:05:08,948
- There already is one.
- Ohh.
107
00:05:08,973 --> 00:05:10,670
- I've done a lot of research.
- Nice.
108
00:05:10,695 --> 00:05:12,987
Did we just invite ourselves
to crash someone's wedding?
109
00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:14,635
Yeah, we did!
110
00:05:14,660 --> 00:05:19,057
Hey! I know everyone's having
their end-of-season yard sales,
111
00:05:19,082 --> 00:05:21,409
but I need you to stop by mine, okay?
112
00:05:21,434 --> 00:05:23,799
Everything's got to go... even the bus.
113
00:05:24,142 --> 00:05:25,362
Especially the bus.
114
00:05:25,728 --> 00:05:28,035
That thing eats gas money by the hundy.
115
00:05:29,023 --> 00:05:30,307
- That's a lot.
- Thank you, Helen.
116
00:05:30,332 --> 00:05:32,566
_
117
00:05:35,577 --> 00:05:37,337
Cramp! Cramp, cramp!
118
00:05:37,362 --> 00:05:38,776
Oh! Already?
119
00:05:38,971 --> 00:05:41,768
Juan Andr�s made us three-egg omelets,
and I had two of them.
120
00:05:41,793 --> 00:05:44,536
- Do the math.
- Oh, fine. We can take it slow.
121
00:05:44,967 --> 00:05:46,385
My abdomen thanks you.
122
00:05:48,304 --> 00:05:49,304
- Whew!
- Ohh.
123
00:05:50,229 --> 00:05:51,260
Don't let me forget the ribbon
124
00:05:51,285 --> 00:05:53,018
for Bo and Jenny's handfasting ceremony.
125
00:05:53,043 --> 00:05:54,213
It should be in the trunk.
126
00:05:54,727 --> 00:05:56,206
Speaking of shared props,
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00:05:56,496 --> 00:05:58,573
I would love to not be
the only one responsible
128
00:05:58,598 --> 00:06:01,123
for transporting all of
them to Simi this year.
129
00:06:01,148 --> 00:06:04,565
And I would love to drive something
other than a 1999 Toyota Tercel,
130
00:06:04,590 --> 00:06:06,659
but God only gives us
what we can handle, right?
131
00:06:07,015 --> 00:06:08,291
Fine.
132
00:06:08,840 --> 00:06:12,502
Oh. I've been musing on a new
scenario for the next faire...
133
00:06:12,796 --> 00:06:15,221
Elizabeth enlists Shakespeare
134
00:06:15,246 --> 00:06:16,956
to investigate traitors on the court.
135
00:06:16,981 --> 00:06:19,288
Paranoia at Othello levels.
136
00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:20,466
What do you think?
137
00:06:20,771 --> 00:06:22,370
Hmm? Sorry.
138
00:06:22,395 --> 00:06:24,682
I've told you, you can't play Othello...
139
00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:27,276
unless you get a black Desdemona,
but even then...
140
00:06:27,301 --> 00:06:29,721
That's not what I said.
What's going on with you?
141
00:06:31,314 --> 00:06:33,432
I don't usually like to
talk about auditions.
142
00:06:33,610 --> 00:06:34,909
Too superstitious.
143
00:06:36,061 --> 00:06:37,393
You have an audition?
144
00:06:38,354 --> 00:06:41,127
"Hoarders the Musical"
wants me to put myself on tape.
145
00:06:41,839 --> 00:06:43,487
A chorus girl dropped out...
146
00:06:43,634 --> 00:06:44,752
of a window.
147
00:06:44,942 --> 00:06:47,073
She'll live, but her femur won't.
148
00:06:48,463 --> 00:06:49,987
But the Simi Faire.
149
00:06:50,262 --> 00:06:53,385
Please! The odds
are completely against me.
150
00:06:54,135 --> 00:06:56,002
But it is now or never.
151
00:06:57,467 --> 00:07:00,291
Well, good for you, then.
I think it's terrific.
152
00:07:02,832 --> 00:07:03,832
What?
153
00:07:06,563 --> 00:07:08,440
Everything in that box is a dollar.
154
00:07:11,126 --> 00:07:12,126
50 cents?
155
00:07:12,151 --> 00:07:14,291
No! What's wrong?
156
00:07:14,316 --> 00:07:17,063
Our most beloved
Didelphimorphian comrade
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00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:18,784
has shed his mortal coil.
158
00:07:18,809 --> 00:07:19,809
What?
159
00:07:20,035 --> 00:07:21,995
RatCat is dead!
160
00:07:22,415 --> 00:07:25,979
And RatCat is... Lil Boy's armadillo?
161
00:07:26,561 --> 00:07:27,729
He is a possum.
162
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,963
Was a possum.
163
00:07:30,380 --> 00:07:31,893
Lil Boy's with my parents this weekend.
164
00:07:31,918 --> 00:07:33,284
What am I gonna tell him when I see him?
165
00:07:34,223 --> 00:07:36,486
Well, how do you know he
wasn't just playing possum?
166
00:07:36,511 --> 00:07:39,182
Because all resuscitation
attempts were unsuccessful.
167
00:07:39,472 --> 00:07:41,346
I'm not stupid, Shart!
168
00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:48,549
I just... I can't believe he's gone!
169
00:07:49,550 --> 00:07:51,323
I know the final weekend of the faire
170
00:07:51,348 --> 00:07:53,262
is always a little hard on you.
171
00:07:53,303 --> 00:07:54,877
Is this really about RatCat?
172
00:07:54,902 --> 00:07:59,689
It's a lot of waterworks
for a trash... cat... rodent?
173
00:08:01,571 --> 00:08:03,579
What matters is that I'm upset.
174
00:08:04,535 --> 00:08:06,134
This is our last weekend at the Royal,
175
00:08:06,852 --> 00:08:10,056
and RatCat won't be able
to experience any of it.
176
00:08:12,024 --> 00:08:13,024
It's a tragedy.
177
00:08:13,431 --> 00:08:15,548
Uh, can you flush a possum?
178
00:08:16,289 --> 00:08:18,524
He deserves a proper sendoff.
179
00:08:19,742 --> 00:08:21,309
It's what Lil Boy would want.
180
00:08:21,642 --> 00:08:23,290
I'd love to help you, honey,
181
00:08:23,315 --> 00:08:25,578
but we have so much left to pack.
182
00:08:25,899 --> 00:08:27,594
We're sorry for your loss.
183
00:08:27,637 --> 00:08:28,637
Okay.
184
00:08:29,115 --> 00:08:30,564
Oh, you could stuff him.
185
00:08:31,017 --> 00:08:32,017
I know a guy.
186
00:08:33,031 --> 00:08:34,097
Taxidermy's an art.
187
00:08:37,914 --> 00:08:40,910
As Buddhist practitioner
Jack Kornfield once said,
188
00:08:41,092 --> 00:08:44,378
"Even death is not to be feared
by one who has lived wisely."
189
00:08:44,884 --> 00:08:46,542
RatCat did live wisely.
190
00:08:48,299 --> 00:08:49,589
It's lovely.
191
00:08:49,614 --> 00:08:51,269
All good things come to an end,
192
00:08:51,294 --> 00:08:53,613
but that doesn't mean those
ends can't be beautiful.
193
00:08:53,935 --> 00:08:55,566
I'll help you lay his soul to rest...
194
00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:56,793
The Buddhist way.
195
00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,597
Does that mean you're
gonna dress him in an orange robe
196
00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:00,128
- and shave his head?
- No.
197
00:09:01,031 --> 00:09:02,550
Well, not just that.
198
00:09:04,309 --> 00:09:06,894
So, you guys selected
the Queen's Romance Package,
199
00:09:06,919 --> 00:09:09,074
which includes an
invocation from the queen,
200
00:09:09,099 --> 00:09:12,042
a 15-minute ceremony,
a reading from Shakespeare,
201
00:09:12,067 --> 00:09:13,808
and an after-hours reception.
202
00:09:13,833 --> 00:09:15,660
And the DJs won't cost extra?
203
00:09:15,685 --> 00:09:16,685
They're...
204
00:09:17,358 --> 00:09:18,628
They're our gift to you.
205
00:09:19,254 --> 00:09:21,113
- Aww!
- Ohh!
206
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:24,539
Oh, did you get the
fabric from the kilt guy?
207
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:25,564
I did.
208
00:09:25,726 --> 00:09:26,726
Who?
209
00:09:26,751 --> 00:09:28,100
Oh, we want to incorporate a little
210
00:09:28,125 --> 00:09:29,847
of my Scottish heritage
into the wedding.
211
00:09:29,872 --> 00:09:31,775
- You're Scottish?
- Mm-hmm... 12%.
212
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:33,019
I just did my DNA.
213
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:36,113
His yarmulke's going to be
the tartan of Clan MacDonald.
214
00:09:36,138 --> 00:09:38,553
Also 17% Ashkenazi Jew.
215
00:09:38,855 --> 00:09:40,113
- Mazel!
- Mm.
216
00:09:40,138 --> 00:09:42,050
Okay, let's talk decorations...
217
00:09:42,075 --> 00:09:44,042
Overall vibe, signature color,
218
00:09:44,067 --> 00:09:45,870
that kind of thing.
I have this, like, mood board...
219
00:09:45,895 --> 00:09:49,527
I don't think we'll need much
more than what's already here.
220
00:09:53,886 --> 00:09:54,886
Yeah.
221
00:09:56,151 --> 00:09:57,500
It is lovely here.
222
00:09:59,253 --> 00:10:00,643
Oh, oh! We do know
223
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:02,433
what Shakespeare reading
we'd like, though.
224
00:10:02,458 --> 00:10:04,253
Sonnet 116.
225
00:10:04,418 --> 00:10:07,116
- Nice choice.
- It's a classic.
226
00:10:07,141 --> 00:10:09,261
All right, I'll get Brian right onto it.
227
00:10:09,286 --> 00:10:12,009
Actually, we were thinking...
228
00:10:12,438 --> 00:10:13,438
could you do it?
229
00:10:14,872 --> 00:10:18,038
You want me to read at your wedding?
230
00:10:18,063 --> 00:10:19,288
Yes!
231
00:10:19,313 --> 00:10:20,548
We still talk about
232
00:10:20,573 --> 00:10:22,220
- the night you arrived...
- Ohh.
233
00:10:22,245 --> 00:10:25,205
... taking the stage
like an enchanted fairy.
234
00:10:25,450 --> 00:10:27,470
- A drunk enchanted fairy.
- Very drunk.
235
00:10:27,495 --> 00:10:29,453
We'd never seen anything like it.
236
00:10:29,478 --> 00:10:32,361
And to have watched you,
all faire season long,
237
00:10:32,386 --> 00:10:35,087
fall deeper and deeper
in love with our world...
238
00:10:35,628 --> 00:10:37,572
Made us remember how we
fell in love with it.
239
00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:41,923
'Twould be mine honor.
240
00:10:42,915 --> 00:10:44,876
- Yay. Aww.
- Ohh!
241
00:10:50,686 --> 00:10:54,040
Hey, man. Uh, just checking in
on transpo to Simi for the Orbs.
242
00:10:54,065 --> 00:10:55,705
Bro, small glitch.
243
00:10:55,730 --> 00:10:57,501
Simi turned down the permit.
244
00:10:57,526 --> 00:10:59,736
Management thought it
might be too anachronistic.
245
00:10:59,761 --> 00:11:02,962
Oho! Okay, that... sucks.
246
00:11:02,987 --> 00:11:05,369
- It happens.
- Okay, well, then, um...
247
00:11:05,885 --> 00:11:08,627
- So, like, my deposit...
- Whoa.
248
00:11:08,652 --> 00:11:11,142
When you bought in,
I told you two things about water balls.
249
00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:13,909
Keep the pool full and that people
run out of oxygen after 10 minutes?
250
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:15,470
Okay, fine... four things.
251
00:11:15,495 --> 00:11:17,556
Those two, plus you got
to run the game yourself,
252
00:11:17,581 --> 00:11:20,283
- and there are no refunds.
- I gave you five grand!
253
00:11:20,308 --> 00:11:22,275
That's... that's my entire savings!
254
00:11:22,300 --> 00:11:25,129
Dude, don't panic, man.
Raleigh's chompin' at the bit.
255
00:11:25,154 --> 00:11:27,111
- Raleigh?
- Yeah, North Carolina.
256
00:11:27,136 --> 00:11:29,033
I know the guy that ran
their escape room last year.
257
00:11:29,058 --> 00:11:30,423
He cleaned up, man.
258
00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:31,947
This is a blessing.
259
00:11:49,714 --> 00:11:51,689
State-of-the-art
impact-resistant material,
260
00:11:51,714 --> 00:11:53,775
padded back rest, carry handles,
and a cup holder.
261
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,915
- Never been used.
- I don't know.
262
00:11:56,709 --> 00:11:58,611
- I'll ship it to Raleigh for you.
- Deal.
263
00:12:00,907 --> 00:12:01,907
Say the word!
264
00:12:01,932 --> 00:12:04,681
That hot tub is priced to
move and freshly bleached...
265
00:12:04,706 --> 00:12:05,767
like my butthole.
266
00:12:09,536 --> 00:12:11,134
- Hey.
- Hey!
267
00:12:11,159 --> 00:12:13,577
Mm, love that cute butt. So tight!
268
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:14,720
Very tight!
269
00:12:15,408 --> 00:12:17,408
Too tight. What's up?
270
00:12:17,433 --> 00:12:18,994
The Orbs of Fury are a no-go.
271
00:12:19,019 --> 00:12:21,595
No permits for Simi,
and I'm out five grand.
272
00:12:21,620 --> 00:12:23,131
- No!
- Yeah, I know.
273
00:12:23,156 --> 00:12:24,659
And I had such big dreams...
274
00:12:24,691 --> 00:12:25,979
Pinball machine,
275
00:12:26,136 --> 00:12:27,861
island off the coast of France,
276
00:12:27,885 --> 00:12:29,096
some stuff in the middle.
277
00:12:29,121 --> 00:12:31,182
Wait. So, they can just take
your money a-and that's it?
278
00:12:31,207 --> 00:12:32,940
No, they can't take it, exactly.
It's more like
279
00:12:32,965 --> 00:12:35,846
I go to the Raleigh Faire
or I lose the deposit.
280
00:12:37,656 --> 00:12:39,396
- You should go to Raleigh.
- What?
281
00:12:39,421 --> 00:12:41,162
You were so excited about this.
282
00:12:41,187 --> 00:12:43,338
I mean, I can't leave the guys.
There's the show.
283
00:12:43,363 --> 00:12:45,120
So you're gonna walk away
from this investment?
284
00:12:45,145 --> 00:12:46,799
They're big boys. They'll be okay.
285
00:12:46,824 --> 00:12:47,838
They need me.
286
00:12:48,222 --> 00:12:49,422
I'm the eye candy.
287
00:12:50,117 --> 00:12:52,104
When an opportunity presents itself,
288
00:12:52,422 --> 00:12:54,206
shouldn't you reach out and grab it?
289
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:55,454
Oh, yeah?
290
00:12:56,244 --> 00:12:57,323
I mean...
291
00:12:58,449 --> 00:12:59,449
yeah?
292
00:12:59,474 --> 00:13:00,474
Yeah.
293
00:13:01,036 --> 00:13:03,803
Yeah! David, you have
to take a chance on you.
294
00:13:03,958 --> 00:13:05,030
You know what?
295
00:13:05,155 --> 00:13:06,206
You're right.
296
00:13:06,230 --> 00:13:08,406
- Of course I'm right!
- Yeah. Okay.
297
00:13:08,813 --> 00:13:10,788
Okay, s... Let's do it!
298
00:13:10,813 --> 00:13:12,897
- Yes, let's do it!
- Yes? Yeah!
299
00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:15,069
- "Let's"?
- Yeah, we're going to Raleigh!
300
00:13:15,094 --> 00:13:17,366
- Oh, thank you. Thank you.
- Yeah, you're welcome.
301
00:13:17,391 --> 00:13:21,217
Mm-hmm. Umm, so... so just you and me?
302
00:13:21,242 --> 00:13:23,116
I think the Friar usually
goes to the Raleigh Faire,
303
00:13:23,141 --> 00:13:24,909
if he can hitch a ride... DUIs.
304
00:13:24,934 --> 00:13:26,849
Look at me. I'm a businessman.
305
00:13:26,874 --> 00:13:28,038
We should get you on LinkedIn.
306
00:13:28,063 --> 00:13:29,673
Oh, I should probably go tell the guys.
307
00:13:29,698 --> 00:13:32,006
- Yeah, I should probably...
- Procrastinate with me?
308
00:13:32,031 --> 00:13:33,100
Good idea.
309
00:13:33,524 --> 00:13:34,524
Oh! Hang on.
310
00:13:34,863 --> 00:13:35,863
Oh!
311
00:13:36,492 --> 00:13:38,608
Oh, tell Joanntha that her
new clutch is fetching.
312
00:13:38,633 --> 00:13:40,827
I mean, I'm just assuming, but...
313
00:13:42,405 --> 00:13:43,405
Mom?
314
00:13:43,430 --> 00:13:44,795
What time do you get in tomorrow night?
315
00:13:44,820 --> 00:13:46,639
Why are you calling from Mom's phone?
316
00:13:46,753 --> 00:13:49,522
Ugh. 'Cause Hudson's
playing Crossy Road on mine.
317
00:13:49,547 --> 00:13:52,545
The kids can't wait to
see their Auntie Mandy.
318
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:54,460
Erin, you know how
much I love the kids...
319
00:13:54,485 --> 00:13:56,530
Wait, hold on. What?
320
00:13:56,555 --> 00:13:59,038
Remi wants another yogurt.
321
00:13:59,312 --> 00:14:01,702
- I told her she was getting chunky.
- I'm on with Amanda.
322
00:14:01,727 --> 00:14:03,092
Erin, there's something
I have to tell you.
323
00:14:03,293 --> 00:14:06,038
Mandy! Oh, Mandy, my love.
324
00:14:06,063 --> 00:14:08,053
I'm gonna be at a benefit
when you get home,
325
00:14:08,078 --> 00:14:11,944
but I got you an appointment
with Uncle Gary's second wife.
326
00:14:11,969 --> 00:14:13,069
She's a headhunter.
327
00:14:13,094 --> 00:14:14,670
I told her you have a terrible r�sum�
328
00:14:14,695 --> 00:14:16,967
but a sparkling personality.
329
00:14:16,992 --> 00:14:20,038
- She suggested real estate.
- Real estate?
330
00:14:20,063 --> 00:14:22,186
Uncle Gary's second wife is in prison.
331
00:14:22,211 --> 00:14:23,749
I meant Uncle Larry.
332
00:14:24,161 --> 00:14:25,225
Also,
333
00:14:26,100 --> 00:14:28,030
Erin... she saw Brett.
334
00:14:28,308 --> 00:14:30,405
- With a date.
- No! Ugh.
335
00:14:30,430 --> 00:14:33,194
Geez! I was waiting
to see you in person,
336
00:14:33,219 --> 00:14:35,311
but he was with Evy Lipman. I'm sorry.
337
00:14:35,336 --> 00:14:37,338
Don't be. He's moving on. It's fine.
338
00:14:37,363 --> 00:14:39,014
- Really?
- Evy Lipman?
339
00:14:39,039 --> 00:14:40,694
Please. Forget it.
340
00:14:40,874 --> 00:14:42,616
Dementia runs in that family.
341
00:14:42,641 --> 00:14:44,553
He can do whatever he wants,
because I'm moving on, too.
342
00:14:44,578 --> 00:14:47,249
- No way. The curved-penis guy?
- Excuse me?
343
00:14:47,274 --> 00:14:49,014
- Mom!
- What?
344
00:14:50,646 --> 00:14:52,006
I'm going to another faire...
345
00:14:52,163 --> 00:14:53,363
In North Carolina.
346
00:14:54,491 --> 00:14:56,085
It's the mud guy, isn't it?
347
00:14:57,084 --> 00:14:58,444
The really cute one?
348
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:00,272
Actually, yes.
349
00:15:00,297 --> 00:15:02,354
And I know you're gonna
try and talk me out of it,
350
00:15:02,545 --> 00:15:03,903
but I want you to know that I have th...
351
00:15:03,928 --> 00:15:04,928
Good for you.
352
00:15:06,601 --> 00:15:07,608
Wait, what?
353
00:15:07,633 --> 00:15:09,984
I saw you. I saw him.
354
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:11,258
I get it.
355
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,260
You do?
356
00:15:15,107 --> 00:15:17,256
Is Remi allergic to dairy?
357
00:15:17,746 --> 00:15:19,123
She looks really blotchy.
358
00:15:19,148 --> 00:15:20,396
She's fine!
359
00:15:20,709 --> 00:15:22,420
Save yourself, bitch.
360
00:15:22,731 --> 00:15:23,888
What do you want me to tell Mom?
361
00:15:24,741 --> 00:15:26,685
I guess tell her that...
362
00:15:27,319 --> 00:15:29,865
I met a businessman and
that I'm going to Raleigh.
363
00:15:33,063 --> 00:15:34,325
Yeah.
364
00:15:45,447 --> 00:15:46,447
How's this?
365
00:15:47,608 --> 00:15:49,943
Size is good. The color... ugh.
366
00:15:49,968 --> 00:15:52,349
Hot pink has no meaning in Buddhism.
367
00:15:52,374 --> 00:15:54,667
So you're asking me to find
a more Buddhist shoe box
368
00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:56,224
for your possum funeral?
369
00:15:56,450 --> 00:15:58,123
'Cause I might have to call "bullshit."
370
00:15:58,957 --> 00:16:00,865
Hey, uh... hey, guys. Y-You got a sec?
371
00:16:00,890 --> 00:16:02,334
- Sure.
- We're kind of busy here.
372
00:16:02,972 --> 00:16:07,428
Well, umm, I bought a franchise,
a game... uh, the Orbs of Fury.
373
00:16:07,453 --> 00:16:10,474
- Ohh! The big plastic water balls?
- Yeah.
374
00:16:10,983 --> 00:16:12,974
Nice! Suck it, maximum weight limit!
375
00:16:12,999 --> 00:16:14,958
I got a man on the inside now.
376
00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:16,732
You're gonna let me ride, right?
377
00:16:16,757 --> 00:16:19,929
Totally... If you want
to visit me in Raleigh.
378
00:16:20,719 --> 00:16:22,070
Huh? What are you talking about?
379
00:16:22,095 --> 00:16:23,250
Simi turned it down.
380
00:16:23,275 --> 00:16:24,929
Wait, so you're bailing on us?
381
00:16:24,954 --> 00:16:26,912
I-I would never. I'm not bailing.
382
00:16:26,937 --> 00:16:28,614
I'm... I'm just diversifying.
383
00:16:28,639 --> 00:16:30,217
You know, I-investing in my future.
384
00:16:30,242 --> 00:16:32,015
What about our future?
What about our show?
385
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:34,718
- No, I know. It's just...
- Oh, actually... No, you don't know.
386
00:16:34,743 --> 00:16:36,664
This is a three-man
operation, all right?
387
00:16:36,689 --> 00:16:38,570
We leave on Monday,
and you spring this on us now?
388
00:16:38,595 --> 00:16:39,687
That's messed up!
389
00:16:40,462 --> 00:16:41,811
And selfish, right?
390
00:16:43,273 --> 00:16:44,453
Good for you, man.
391
00:16:44,834 --> 00:16:47,304
- What?!
- Everybody know a grasshopper can jump,
392
00:16:47,329 --> 00:16:49,195
but a grasshopper also has wings.
393
00:16:49,413 --> 00:16:51,289
What are they for,
if not to one day fly?
394
00:16:52,030 --> 00:16:54,179
He's not a grasshopper.
He's the eye candy.
395
00:16:54,798 --> 00:16:55,798
"Was."
396
00:16:58,672 --> 00:17:00,187
I thought I was the eye candy.
397
00:17:01,765 --> 00:17:06,031
? A condition, a disease,
or is it a matter of will? ?
398
00:17:06,168 --> 00:17:07,905
- ? He's a freak ?
- ? She's a loser ?
399
00:17:07,930 --> 00:17:11,062
? Perhaps they're mentally ill ?
400
00:17:11,087 --> 00:17:13,390
? One person's trash ?
401
00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:17,179
? Is someone else's treasure ?
402
00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:19,382
? Pieces of the past ?
403
00:17:19,656 --> 00:17:22,921
? Are simply there to measure ?
404
00:17:22,946 --> 00:17:25,906
? The love that they need ?
405
00:17:25,931 --> 00:17:28,803
? A love that has no border ?
406
00:17:28,828 --> 00:17:31,787
? There's no love like the love ?
407
00:17:31,812 --> 00:17:34,597
? The love of things
stacked high above ?
408
00:17:34,622 --> 00:17:38,476
? There's no love like
the love of stuff ?
409
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:44,849
? To a hoarderrrr ?
410
00:17:48,904 --> 00:17:50,583
That was... wow.
411
00:17:51,322 --> 00:17:52,982
Um, but should we do one
412
00:17:53,007 --> 00:17:54,544
with just the person who's auditioning?
413
00:17:55,683 --> 00:17:57,279
Oh, right. Yes, of course.
414
00:17:58,130 --> 00:17:59,130
Oh!
415
00:17:59,155 --> 00:18:00,560
The idea of chorus girl
416
00:18:00,585 --> 00:18:02,349
is beginning to appeal
more and more to me.
417
00:18:02,805 --> 00:18:05,974
A chance to create a new
persona as one of the people.
418
00:18:06,654 --> 00:18:09,029
I was in the chorus of "A Chorus Line"
419
00:18:09,054 --> 00:18:10,497
at a dinner theater once.
420
00:18:10,522 --> 00:18:13,957
The signature dish was the
Singularly Sensational Salmon.
421
00:18:15,098 --> 00:18:16,607
I need to use the little girls' room.
422
00:18:17,202 --> 00:18:19,856
Oh, and while I know
you don't love Alicia...
423
00:18:19,881 --> 00:18:22,247
I don't love raisin bagels.
424
00:18:22,406 --> 00:18:24,068
I despise Alicia.
425
00:18:24,285 --> 00:18:25,622
She's been plotting a coup d'etat
426
00:18:25,647 --> 00:18:27,005
since the day she joined the court.
427
00:18:27,030 --> 00:18:28,990
Well, she's put in the time,
and she knows the role.
428
00:18:29,015 --> 00:18:30,521
She's next in line to the throne.
429
00:18:31,825 --> 00:18:33,302
I'll make it work.
430
00:18:34,287 --> 00:18:35,685
I know you will.
431
00:18:38,458 --> 00:18:40,365
? Pieces of the past... ?
432
00:18:41,946 --> 00:18:43,536
I can tell she has her hopes up.
433
00:18:43,561 --> 00:18:44,724
Well, why shouldn't she?
434
00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:45,958
She's good.
435
00:18:46,841 --> 00:18:49,396
Being good doesn't guarantee anything.
436
00:18:58,124 --> 00:18:59,333
Wait, stop.
437
00:19:00,045 --> 00:19:01,318
This doesn't feel right.
438
00:19:01,477 --> 00:19:04,306
When I was 8 and my daddy was
gonna put down my dog Hepzibah,
439
00:19:04,420 --> 00:19:06,544
we gave her the best last
day a dog could dream of.
440
00:19:06,956 --> 00:19:09,154
She went to Steak 'n Shake...
The drive-through...
441
00:19:09,179 --> 00:19:11,747
And she ate a Frisco Melt,
and she threw it up.
442
00:19:11,772 --> 00:19:13,169
She ate another one, and then she...
443
00:19:13,438 --> 00:19:14,850
ran around the backyard without a leash
444
00:19:14,875 --> 00:19:17,289
and chewed up three
of Mom's favorite pillows.
445
00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:19,220
My baby's gone and...
446
00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:21,166
RatCat's last day was just...
447
00:19:22,565 --> 00:19:23,729
a regular one.
448
00:19:24,459 --> 00:19:25,852
Nobody to bear witness.
449
00:19:28,240 --> 00:19:30,492
It's like Whitney Houston.
450
00:19:32,978 --> 00:19:35,135
Or... Prince.
451
00:19:38,568 --> 00:19:40,034
He deserved better.
452
00:19:46,243 --> 00:19:50,073
As we knew, the close of another
wonderful summer season,
453
00:19:50,537 --> 00:19:54,252
I feel we ought to read
from a most appropriate play...
454
00:19:54,277 --> 00:19:56,581
"A Midsummer Night's Dream."
455
00:19:56,746 --> 00:19:59,549
'Twould be an honor to perform
with ye, Your Majesty.
456
00:19:59,574 --> 00:20:01,682
Ah, but I am feeling faint
457
00:20:01,707 --> 00:20:03,838
from the late summer heat on this day.
458
00:20:03,863 --> 00:20:05,401
Lady Alicia,
459
00:20:05,854 --> 00:20:08,151
wouldst thou read the role of Helena,
460
00:20:08,176 --> 00:20:09,495
if it please thee?
461
00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:12,534
Yes, indeed, Your Majesty!
462
00:20:12,559 --> 00:20:14,221
Mayhap we should delay the reading
463
00:20:14,246 --> 00:20:16,713
until thou dost recover, my Queen.
464
00:20:17,886 --> 00:20:19,062
Nay, nay.
465
00:20:19,087 --> 00:20:23,338
I wish to see how Lady Alicia
doth perform in my place.
466
00:20:29,424 --> 00:20:33,573
Love looks not with the eyes
467
00:20:33,598 --> 00:20:35,909
but with the mind.
468
00:20:36,310 --> 00:20:38,401
And therefore,
469
00:20:38,989 --> 00:20:44,392
winged Cupid is painted blind.
470
00:20:48,851 --> 00:20:53,080
Nor hath love's mind
of any judgment taste.
471
00:20:53,277 --> 00:20:56,682
- Hey! Can I grab a wine glass?
- Red or white?
472
00:20:56,707 --> 00:20:58,536
Oh, no, it's for Bo to step on.
473
00:20:58,561 --> 00:21:00,573
- He's a little Jewish.
- Ahh.
474
00:21:00,955 --> 00:21:03,877
Wait a minute. This might be
the last time I see you!
475
00:21:03,902 --> 00:21:05,987
I'm taking off early,
and I don't go to Simi,
476
00:21:06,012 --> 00:21:07,268
so I'm not gonna see you there.
477
00:21:07,293 --> 00:21:08,807
Do you go to Raleigh?
I'm going to Raleigh.
478
00:21:08,832 --> 00:21:11,661
Oh, no, sorry. I only work this faire.
479
00:21:11,686 --> 00:21:14,117
The rest of the year,
I teach special ed in Cooperstown.
480
00:21:14,142 --> 00:21:15,839
- Oh, really?
- Yep.
481
00:21:15,864 --> 00:21:17,370
It gets awkward when students show up
482
00:21:17,395 --> 00:21:19,209
and stick ones down my cleavage.
483
00:21:19,234 --> 00:21:20,479
What are you gonna do there?
484
00:21:20,504 --> 00:21:22,909
David has this great
opportunity with the Orbs?
485
00:21:22,934 --> 00:21:24,854
Was that a question or a statement?
486
00:21:25,260 --> 00:21:26,986
Shameless millennial upspeak?
487
00:21:28,199 --> 00:21:29,643
It's all unfolding live.
488
00:21:29,668 --> 00:21:31,377
First, I thought we
were gonna go to Simi,
489
00:21:31,402 --> 00:21:33,080
but then I also thought
my family was gonna send
490
00:21:33,105 --> 00:21:35,541
a private security service to
drag me back to the city...
491
00:21:35,566 --> 00:21:37,127
Pretty much the only thing
they haven't tried yet.
492
00:21:37,498 --> 00:21:41,065
But now I'm going to
Raleigh... with David.
493
00:21:41,105 --> 00:21:43,885
I once followed a guy
who followed Springsteen.
494
00:21:43,910 --> 00:21:46,604
I even got a lower-back tattoo
that says "Tunnel of Love."
495
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:48,940
Poor choice.
496
00:21:49,371 --> 00:21:50,904
He lives in Ottawa now.
497
00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:52,901
I'm not following a guy.
498
00:21:53,529 --> 00:21:54,958
I'm following my heart...
499
00:21:55,401 --> 00:21:57,129
to Raleigh, with David.
500
00:21:57,838 --> 00:21:59,465
Yeah. I'll find my thing.
501
00:22:00,250 --> 00:22:02,809
Well, you can never have
enough pub wenches, eh?
502
00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:03,834
Ah!
503
00:22:05,846 --> 00:22:08,267
- L'chaim.
- Thank you.
504
00:22:10,102 --> 00:22:13,626
Yes! Yes! Yes!
505
00:22:14,254 --> 00:22:16,892
Dearest Shart, wouldst thou not agree
506
00:22:16,917 --> 00:22:19,908
that this is our
bestest, most beauteous,
507
00:22:19,933 --> 00:22:23,486
most generous audience
that we have ever had?
508
00:22:26,495 --> 00:22:28,887
And here I thought that brown
stuff on your nose was mud.
509
00:22:28,912 --> 00:22:30,126
Stick!
510
00:22:30,735 --> 00:22:33,994
But seriously, good people,
this is our real job,
511
00:22:34,019 --> 00:22:36,158
and we would appreciate
whatever coins you might have
512
00:22:36,183 --> 00:22:37,587
- in your pocket.
- Cough it up.
513
00:22:37,847 --> 00:22:40,736
Pockets? Did someone say "pockets"?
514
00:22:40,761 --> 00:22:44,064
Mine are as holey as the
Archbishop of Canterbury!
515
00:22:45,378 --> 00:22:47,048
Well, if it isn't my long-lost sister...
516
00:22:47,073 --> 00:22:48,837
Mistress Dingle O'Belly!
517
00:22:52,587 --> 00:22:54,962
All right, now come
give your big sister a hug!
518
00:22:54,987 --> 00:22:57,351
Ohh! Let's go! Whew!
519
00:23:01,415 --> 00:23:02,798
Aw! I missed you!
520
00:23:18,486 --> 00:23:20,094
What the hell was that?
521
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:21,408
The woman in the front row?
522
00:23:21,433 --> 00:23:23,798
She threw me off, too! Zombie contacts.
523
00:23:24,408 --> 00:23:25,462
I'm gonna have nightmares.
524
00:23:25,487 --> 00:23:26,720
I meant Natasha.
525
00:23:27,207 --> 00:23:29,252
- You knew about her.
- No, I didn't.
526
00:23:29,277 --> 00:23:31,172
- Should I go?
- No.
527
00:23:31,197 --> 00:23:32,212
You said you were gonna tell him.
528
00:23:32,237 --> 00:23:33,579
No, you said you were gonna tell him.
529
00:23:34,108 --> 00:23:35,457
No, you were gonna t...
530
00:23:35,482 --> 00:23:37,462
Oh, wait! Yeah, I was gonna tell him.
531
00:23:37,487 --> 00:23:38,923
- I'm gonna go.
- No!
532
00:23:39,337 --> 00:23:40,869
You're the one leaving us in the lurch.
533
00:23:40,894 --> 00:23:42,689
You don't get to be mad when
we fill the lurch.
534
00:23:42,714 --> 00:23:43,714
This isn't the lurch.
535
00:23:43,726 --> 00:23:45,564
- The lurch is in California.
- The lurch is you leaving.
536
00:23:45,589 --> 00:23:47,962
But I haven't left yet,
so there is no lurch.
537
00:23:47,987 --> 00:23:50,672
We had to grab Natasha before
she went to another faire.
538
00:23:50,697 --> 00:23:52,298
- She's good!
- She is. You are.
539
00:23:52,323 --> 00:23:53,923
- Thanks.
- Plus,
540
00:23:54,107 --> 00:23:55,974
she's already used to being
around two guys all the time.
541
00:23:55,999 --> 00:23:57,001
Fine.
542
00:24:02,528 --> 00:24:04,747
Yeah. I should have gone.
543
00:24:04,772 --> 00:24:06,208
Yeah, probably.
544
00:24:12,581 --> 00:24:14,001
I've been thinking about Hepzibah.
545
00:24:14,508 --> 00:24:15,563
From the Bible?
546
00:24:16,976 --> 00:24:18,586
Oh, no... the dog.
547
00:24:20,241 --> 00:24:22,947
I think we should have the
best last day at the Royal...
548
00:24:23,805 --> 00:24:25,023
For RatCat.
549
00:24:25,048 --> 00:24:26,384
We could start at the maypole,
550
00:24:26,409 --> 00:24:27,657
one of my personal favorite spots.
551
00:24:27,682 --> 00:24:29,329
It's so colorful!
552
00:24:29,791 --> 00:24:32,595
Oh, and Cyril's English Toffees!
553
00:24:32,620 --> 00:24:33,657
Mmm!
554
00:24:34,220 --> 00:24:36,306
I mean, RatCat's really gonna miss that.
555
00:24:37,081 --> 00:24:39,087
I've only tried Cyril's
chocolate truffles.
556
00:24:40,157 --> 00:24:41,322
Let's get into some toffee.
557
00:25:27,583 --> 00:25:29,498
Feels good to say a proper goodbye.
558
00:25:29,523 --> 00:25:30,988
Lil Boy would be happy.
559
00:25:31,505 --> 00:25:33,261
Until next time, faire friend.
560
00:25:42,149 --> 00:25:43,246
Hey!
561
00:25:43,561 --> 00:25:46,042
Hey, so, I've been
thinking about Raleigh...
562
00:25:46,067 --> 00:25:49,035
Me too. You were right.
They'll never miss me.
563
00:25:49,060 --> 00:25:51,410
So psyched about these orbs.
It's gonna be awesome.
564
00:25:51,435 --> 00:25:52,769
It is gonna be awesome... for you.
565
00:25:52,794 --> 00:25:54,214
You have a thing. I don't...
566
00:25:54,394 --> 00:25:55,696
really have a thing.
567
00:25:55,721 --> 00:25:57,505
Come on. When you got
here, you had nothing.
568
00:25:57,530 --> 00:25:59,383
Now look at you.
You're running the whole show.
569
00:25:59,408 --> 00:26:00,488
I guess.
570
00:26:01,106 --> 00:26:02,106
Hey.
571
00:26:02,229 --> 00:26:03,566
We're gonna do this together.
572
00:26:04,084 --> 00:26:06,136
All right? Just... we'll figure it out.
573
00:26:06,964 --> 00:26:08,409
- Yeah.
- Right?
574
00:26:08,434 --> 00:26:10,527
- Totally, yeah. Yeah, okay. Come on.
- Yeah, yeah. Come on. Come on.
575
00:26:10,552 --> 00:26:11,847
- Wedding time.
- Yeah!
576
00:26:14,722 --> 00:26:16,680
_
577
00:26:25,671 --> 00:26:26,713
Yeah!
578
00:26:28,486 --> 00:26:30,937
Oh! Hi!
579
00:26:30,962 --> 00:26:32,768
- Love is in the air!
- You like it?
580
00:26:32,793 --> 00:26:33,986
I'm so proud of you!
581
00:26:34,011 --> 00:26:35,924
- It's a dream.
- I love a wedding!
582
00:26:39,703 --> 00:26:41,400
- Why, thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
583
00:26:48,457 --> 00:26:53,419
? The sun, whose beams
most glorious are ?
584
00:26:53,631 --> 00:26:58,911
? Rejecteth no beholder ?
585
00:26:58,936 --> 00:27:03,845
? And your sweet beauty past compare ?
586
00:27:03,870 --> 00:27:08,916
? Made my poor eyes the bolder ?
587
00:27:08,941 --> 00:27:11,620
- As the ties are joined...
- ? Where beauty moves ?
588
00:27:11,645 --> 00:27:13,911
? And wit delights ?
589
00:27:14,151 --> 00:27:19,550
? And signs of kindness bind me ?
590
00:27:20,073 --> 00:27:24,276
? There, O there, where'er I go ?
591
00:27:24,301 --> 00:27:30,301
? I leave my heart behind me ?
592
00:27:31,550 --> 00:27:34,800
And now a reading from
Mistress Ophelia...
593
00:27:35,230 --> 00:27:36,386
Feelsgood.
594
00:27:39,948 --> 00:27:42,784
From Sonnet 116 by William Shakespeare.
595
00:27:45,664 --> 00:27:49,644
"Love is not love which alters
when it alteration finds
596
00:27:50,146 --> 00:27:52,597
"or bends with the remover to remove.
597
00:27:53,203 --> 00:27:54,229
"Oh, no.
598
00:27:54,796 --> 00:27:56,378
"It is an ever-fixed mark
599
00:27:56,403 --> 00:27:58,999
that looks on tempests
and is never shaken."
600
00:28:01,477 --> 00:28:04,374
Master Bo, dost thou take this woman
601
00:28:04,399 --> 00:28:06,132
to be thy lawfully wedded wife?
602
00:28:06,157 --> 00:28:07,157
I do.
603
00:28:07,182 --> 00:28:09,530
And, Mistress Jenny,
dost thou take this man
604
00:28:09,555 --> 00:28:12,139
- to be thy lawfully wedded husband?
- I do.
605
00:28:12,164 --> 00:28:15,297
Then I do pronounce
thee husband and wife.
606
00:28:15,453 --> 00:28:17,257
Thou may kiss thy bride.
607
00:28:23,036 --> 00:28:25,548
Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah!
608
00:28:31,974 --> 00:28:32,974
Yeah!
609
00:28:36,967 --> 00:28:38,764
Are these slacks too big?
610
00:28:38,789 --> 00:28:40,499
Or have I been wearing tights too long?
611
00:28:41,687 --> 00:28:42,687
You look great, babe.
612
00:28:43,891 --> 00:28:45,835
Okay, which shirt?
613
00:28:46,918 --> 00:28:48,077
Is this a trick?
614
00:28:48,242 --> 00:28:49,242
I got it!
615
00:28:50,429 --> 00:28:52,194
- What?
- "Hoarders the Musical."
616
00:28:52,219 --> 00:28:53,873
I'm playing a dust bunny!
617
00:28:53,898 --> 00:28:55,358
Among other roles.
618
00:28:55,383 --> 00:28:57,600
That's amazing, Maggie! Congratulations!
619
00:28:57,625 --> 00:28:59,772
What happened to the
odds being against you?
620
00:28:59,797 --> 00:29:01,202
I guess I overcame the odds.
621
00:29:01,227 --> 00:29:02,288
Ooh! That's a good memoir title.
622
00:29:02,313 --> 00:29:04,007
"Maggie Chainey: Overcoming the Odds."
623
00:29:05,768 --> 00:29:08,061
- I don't know what to say.
- How about "congrats"?
624
00:29:08,711 --> 00:29:10,248
How about you're happy for me?
625
00:29:14,827 --> 00:29:16,537
Of course he's happy for you.
626
00:29:16,562 --> 00:29:18,397
We both are, right?
627
00:29:18,553 --> 00:29:20,685
I'm... happy for you.
628
00:29:23,826 --> 00:29:25,444
Not your best work.
629
00:29:29,742 --> 00:29:31,397
Your slacks are too big.
630
00:29:41,976 --> 00:29:45,960
? Na na na na, na na na na na na ?
631
00:29:50,057 --> 00:29:53,960
? Na na na na, na na na na na na ?
632
00:29:53,985 --> 00:29:56,561
- Aah!
- Oh! God! You scared me!
633
00:29:56,586 --> 00:29:59,056
This is so much better than
the farewell campfire.
634
00:30:00,341 --> 00:30:02,908
I don't think I've ever seen
two people so in love like them.
635
00:30:02,933 --> 00:30:04,564
Then you've never seen "The Notebook."
636
00:30:04,589 --> 00:30:06,548
I mean in real life.
637
00:30:06,573 --> 00:30:10,025
? Don't waste your time
with the little boys ?
638
00:30:10,050 --> 00:30:11,529
? Stay out at the playground... ?
639
00:30:11,554 --> 00:30:15,056
You look gorgeous.
You look like a sexy Minion.
640
00:30:15,081 --> 00:30:16,220
Thank you!
641
00:30:16,317 --> 00:30:18,353
You can borrow it when we get to Simi.
642
00:30:19,367 --> 00:30:21,400
Oh, it just sneaks up on me.
643
00:30:22,448 --> 00:30:24,267
I keep forgetting you're
not gonna be there.
644
00:30:24,292 --> 00:30:25,728
I'm really gonna miss you.
645
00:30:27,966 --> 00:30:29,509
You're my family.
646
00:30:33,762 --> 00:30:35,439
All good things come to an end.
647
00:30:37,054 --> 00:30:39,962
But that doesn't mean those
ends can't be beautiful.
648
00:30:40,762 --> 00:30:43,166
- That's lovely.
- Yeah, it's a Buddhist thing.
649
00:30:44,364 --> 00:30:45,887
? Gotta give me that big love ?
650
00:30:45,912 --> 00:30:47,994
- I love you.
- I love you.
651
00:30:48,019 --> 00:30:50,158
? Na na na na na na ?
652
00:30:59,392 --> 00:31:00,868
Ah! Chair thing!
653
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:09,845
Let's go!
654
00:31:13,257 --> 00:31:15,314
- Go ahead, man.
- Oh, no, you go ahead.
655
00:31:15,503 --> 00:31:17,103
Looks like you can handle it.
656
00:31:17,701 --> 00:31:19,407
I... I can!
657
00:31:19,861 --> 00:31:22,142
But you got this. I mean, you can
probably do this all on your own.
658
00:31:22,167 --> 00:31:25,275
I'd really prefer if no one
does this all on their own.
659
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:28,960
Fine.
660
00:31:33,245 --> 00:31:35,857
Ohh! Whoo! Whoo!
661
00:31:40,651 --> 00:31:43,892
Hey! Sorry about earlier.
662
00:31:44,573 --> 00:31:45,947
I'm sorry, too.
663
00:31:47,891 --> 00:31:49,611
? One, two, three, hey! ?
664
00:31:49,636 --> 00:31:50,673
I'm excited.
665
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:52,480
We'll see.
666
00:32:01,056 --> 00:32:02,259
Milady.
667
00:32:02,751 --> 00:32:04,040
Thank you!
668
00:32:05,358 --> 00:32:08,392
Not just for this, but for everything.
669
00:32:08,839 --> 00:32:09,839
For today.
670
00:32:10,609 --> 00:32:12,198
You went along and didn't skip a beat.
671
00:32:13,543 --> 00:32:14,917
Unlike RatCat's heart,
672
00:32:15,472 --> 00:32:17,272
which skipped all the beats.
673
00:32:20,918 --> 00:32:22,987
I appreciate you indulging me.
674
00:32:23,306 --> 00:32:24,784
I like indulging you.
675
00:32:25,281 --> 00:32:27,870
You shine with true Zen spirit.
676
00:32:29,952 --> 00:32:30,952
Cheers.
677
00:32:30,977 --> 00:32:32,419
? Can't tell you how we do it ?
678
00:32:32,444 --> 00:32:34,359
? Gotta show you how we move it ?
679
00:32:34,387 --> 00:32:36,737
? Just let your worries fade
away, baby ?
680
00:32:36,762 --> 00:32:38,018
- Hey!
- Huh?
681
00:32:38,043 --> 00:32:39,117
Hey, you can't touch this.
682
00:32:39,142 --> 00:32:41,172
- This cake's for the bride and groom.
- Sorry!
683
00:32:41,197 --> 00:32:42,656
- They have not even taken a picture.
- Sorry.
684
00:32:42,681 --> 00:32:44,390
Stoners! Get out of here!
685
00:32:46,183 --> 00:32:49,195
Cyril, you've outdone yourself.
You're the cocktail king!
686
00:32:50,751 --> 00:32:52,615
- Hey!
- Hi.
687
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:54,813
Cheers! Yes!
688
00:32:54,838 --> 00:32:57,509
So, I know Bo and Jenny said no gifts,
689
00:32:57,890 --> 00:33:01,032
but do you think they'd
want a gently used hot tub?
690
00:33:01,455 --> 00:33:03,413
I only made love in it four times...
691
00:33:03,438 --> 00:33:04,566
This morning.
692
00:33:06,096 --> 00:33:08,664
I'll throw in the chlorine tablets, too!
693
00:33:08,689 --> 00:33:10,813
Brett! What are you doing here?
694
00:33:12,657 --> 00:33:14,157
Okay, l-let me explain.
695
00:33:14,182 --> 00:33:15,876
No! I know you're hurting,
696
00:33:15,901 --> 00:33:17,845
and I know you want me
back, and I get it,
697
00:33:17,870 --> 00:33:19,118
but it's over, Brett.
698
00:33:19,821 --> 00:33:21,821
- I...
- I'm sorry, okay?
699
00:33:22,823 --> 00:33:24,696
I'm just here to get
back the engagement ring.
700
00:33:24,721 --> 00:33:25,721
What?!
701
00:33:25,984 --> 00:33:28,070
Are you getting engaged to Evy Lipman?
702
00:33:28,621 --> 00:33:31,226
No! No, I only went over there twice.
703
00:33:31,251 --> 00:33:33,359
E-Erin said you were going to
some other faire or something.
704
00:33:33,384 --> 00:33:34,689
I didn't know when I
was gonna see you again.
705
00:33:34,714 --> 00:33:35,844
It's my grandmother's ring,
706
00:33:35,869 --> 00:33:37,586
and my mom's been up my ass about it.
707
00:33:37,964 --> 00:33:38,968
Oh.
708
00:33:41,361 --> 00:33:43,609
Yeah, I feel like a real idiot now.
709
00:33:45,242 --> 00:33:46,436
Need any pointers?
710
00:33:46,461 --> 00:33:48,461
I'm very practiced at
feeling like an idiot.
711
00:33:50,437 --> 00:33:51,437
What?
712
00:33:52,063 --> 00:33:53,063
No snark?
713
00:33:53,605 --> 00:33:54,606
No.
714
00:33:57,299 --> 00:33:59,265
After what you did for Delilah?
715
00:34:00,255 --> 00:34:02,258
- That was...
- Important to me.
716
00:34:04,063 --> 00:34:06,094
After everything I put you through,
717
00:34:06,119 --> 00:34:07,351
it was the least I could do.
718
00:34:08,226 --> 00:34:10,483
? Keep it, keep it groovin' ?
719
00:34:10,508 --> 00:34:12,047
? Keep it, keep it movin' ?
720
00:34:12,072 --> 00:34:13,890
? Keep it, keep it groovin' ?
721
00:34:16,905 --> 00:34:19,154
All right, party people!
722
00:34:19,190 --> 00:34:22,715
It's time to slow things down.
723
00:34:22,740 --> 00:34:25,302
This one's for all the lovers out there.
724
00:34:26,035 --> 00:34:28,006
Ohh, yeahhh.
725
00:34:39,306 --> 00:34:41,228
I shouldn't be surprised
you're such a good dancer.
726
00:34:41,253 --> 00:34:44,071
Who, me? Seven years
of contemporary jazz
727
00:34:44,096 --> 00:34:46,657
and several high school musicals,
thank you very much.
728
00:34:46,682 --> 00:34:47,718
Oh...
729
00:34:47,743 --> 00:34:50,298
I still know some of
my Harold Hill soft-shoe.
730
00:34:51,061 --> 00:34:52,892
Actually... a-five, six, seven...
731
00:34:52,917 --> 00:34:55,399
Oh, I'd love to see it... really.
732
00:34:56,158 --> 00:34:57,290
But I'm thinking...
733
00:34:58,237 --> 00:35:00,947
maybe you should do a
dance with your girl.
734
00:35:01,449 --> 00:35:04,353
You and I are gonna have
lots of slow dances together.
735
00:35:04,577 --> 00:35:07,103
God bless your
non-dysfunctional parents.
736
00:35:08,207 --> 00:35:10,228
You are extraordinary.
737
00:35:23,883 --> 00:35:26,969
Like, I really feel like this was,
like, fate, you know?
738
00:35:26,994 --> 00:35:28,642
- Ohh.
- Yeah.
739
00:35:29,037 --> 00:35:31,290
So, like, the kind of queen
that I want to be is like...
740
00:35:33,871 --> 00:35:36,544
- Alicia sucks.
- I know.
741
00:35:36,569 --> 00:35:37,736
She's been running around
742
00:35:37,761 --> 00:35:40,665
yelling "God save the me" at everyone.
743
00:35:41,744 --> 00:35:44,243
Well, you and I haven't
always gotten along, either.
744
00:35:46,492 --> 00:35:48,243
At least you've always been talented.
745
00:35:52,621 --> 00:35:55,273
I really am happy for you.
746
00:35:57,391 --> 00:35:58,689
I'll miss you.
747
00:36:00,953 --> 00:36:03,282
I'll miss our martinis at sunset,
748
00:36:03,307 --> 00:36:06,356
making fun of that horrible
steak-on-a-stake girl...
749
00:36:06,381 --> 00:36:07,884
Your homemade muesli.
750
00:36:08,081 --> 00:36:09,501
I'll miss you, too.
751
00:36:10,252 --> 00:36:12,733
But we'll talk, we'll make plans.
752
00:36:12,758 --> 00:36:14,572
It's not like we'll never
see each other again.
753
00:36:15,855 --> 00:36:19,548
Besides, I feel like I'm leaving
you in pretty good hands.
754
00:36:23,394 --> 00:36:25,861
Maggie, my Queen...
755
00:36:26,353 --> 00:36:28,282
I'll see you on opening night.
756
00:36:34,679 --> 00:36:36,392
If everything hadn't
happened the way it did,
757
00:36:36,417 --> 00:36:39,038
who's to say we wouldn't have
fallen apart eventually anyway?
758
00:36:39,860 --> 00:36:42,897
That's... one way to look at it.
759
00:36:43,628 --> 00:36:46,030
The wedding that's going
on out there right now,
760
00:36:46,332 --> 00:36:47,702
that's what a wedding should be.
761
00:36:49,381 --> 00:36:51,366
Two people who are ready to be together
762
00:36:51,391 --> 00:36:53,523
because they already know what
they want and who they are.
763
00:36:54,876 --> 00:36:56,413
I'm still kind of figuring that out.
764
00:36:56,999 --> 00:36:58,259
Me too.
765
00:37:00,483 --> 00:37:02,358
Well, I did figure one thing out...
766
00:37:02,794 --> 00:37:05,275
I do not want to go out
with Evy Lipman again.
767
00:37:05,623 --> 00:37:07,671
She's unfriendly and
wears too much foundation.
768
00:37:07,696 --> 00:37:09,452
Wait, is that what that line
under her jaw is?
769
00:37:09,477 --> 00:37:10,681
I couldn't figure it out.
770
00:37:10,706 --> 00:37:12,655
- It's crusty.
- Extremely.
771
00:37:16,424 --> 00:37:18,385
I just don't think about
it that much anymore,
772
00:37:18,410 --> 00:37:19,497
'cause at the end of the day,
773
00:37:19,522 --> 00:37:21,911
it's about how the horse feels, not me.
774
00:37:21,936 --> 00:37:23,505
Yeah, that's really fascinating.
775
00:37:23,530 --> 00:37:25,458
- One Bo-jito, please.
- Got it.
776
00:37:25,742 --> 00:37:27,778
The Jenny-mopolitan is tasty.
777
00:37:27,803 --> 00:37:29,831
Signature cocktails... nice touch.
778
00:37:29,856 --> 00:37:30,895
Thank you.
779
00:37:32,005 --> 00:37:34,486
I hear you're planning to go to Raleigh.
780
00:37:34,511 --> 00:37:36,419
- Yep.
- Why?
781
00:37:37,762 --> 00:37:39,059
I'm going with David.
782
00:37:39,824 --> 00:37:42,458
I know you'll be devastated
not to have me there at Simi.
783
00:37:42,483 --> 00:37:43,825
Who are you gonna body-slam in mud?
784
00:37:43,850 --> 00:37:45,504
Actually, I am not going to Simi.
785
00:37:45,529 --> 00:37:48,153
I booked a role in a Broadway musical.
786
00:37:48,178 --> 00:37:50,442
Oh, my God! That's amazing!
787
00:37:50,467 --> 00:37:53,309
When opportunity arises,
you have to grab it.
788
00:37:54,233 --> 00:37:55,489
So I hear.
789
00:37:57,872 --> 00:37:58,872
So...
790
00:37:59,943 --> 00:38:01,301
this is goodbye, then.
791
00:38:01,801 --> 00:38:03,122
Oh, I don't do goodbyes.
792
00:38:03,147 --> 00:38:05,005
I prefer to disappear in
the middle of the night.
793
00:38:05,030 --> 00:38:06,872
- The Irish goodbye.
- The French exit.
794
00:38:06,897 --> 00:38:07,897
Ghosting.
795
00:38:07,922 --> 00:38:09,637
I guess every culture
has a name for avoiding
796
00:38:09,662 --> 00:38:11,700
prolonged interaction at
the end of the gathering.
797
00:38:14,692 --> 00:38:15,778
Uh, Maggie?
798
00:38:16,511 --> 00:38:17,926
Would you like to dance?
799
00:38:18,525 --> 00:38:19,656
With me?
800
00:38:22,558 --> 00:38:24,325
I'd love to.
801
00:38:27,856 --> 00:38:29,858
I'll take that bottle of Sauvignon Blanc
802
00:38:29,883 --> 00:38:31,153
I asked you to chill.
803
00:38:35,468 --> 00:38:38,270
You were good today,
reading at the wedding.
804
00:38:38,295 --> 00:38:41,075
That means a lot coming
from the bard himself.
805
00:38:44,012 --> 00:38:45,348
Care to dance, milady?
806
00:38:45,651 --> 00:38:46,926
I believe I would.
807
00:38:57,925 --> 00:39:00,700
So, Amanda Klein...
808
00:39:01,513 --> 00:39:03,989
your very first Ren Faire
has come to a close.
809
00:39:04,014 --> 00:39:05,450
Indeed, it has.
810
00:39:05,541 --> 00:39:08,528
Thoughts, comments, concerns?
Notes from a city lady?
811
00:39:08,927 --> 00:39:11,495
Actually, no. No changes.
812
00:39:11,835 --> 00:39:13,359
It was perfect.
813
00:39:15,207 --> 00:39:16,614
I'm very glad to hear that.
814
00:39:39,836 --> 00:39:40,836
Amanda?
815
00:40:01,868 --> 00:40:04,255
Tickets! Get your tickets!
816
00:40:29,105 --> 00:40:30,105
Stick!
817
00:40:38,449 --> 00:40:41,234
All good gentles, repeat after me!
818
00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:43,854
God save the queen!
819
00:40:43,953 --> 00:40:46,182
God save the queen!
820
00:40:49,285 --> 00:40:52,120
- Once more!
- God save the queen!
821
00:40:52,145 --> 00:40:54,272
Again, good people of England!
822
00:40:54,297 --> 00:40:56,135
God save the queen!
823
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,104
God save the queen!
824
00:40:58,567 --> 00:41:03,542
Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah!
825
00:41:10,064 --> 00:41:15,064
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
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