All language subtitles for S1E8-The Pageant Show_Subtítulos01.ENG

[whinnies]

Hello, I'm Mr. Ed.

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪

♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪

♪ Is the famous
Mister Ed ♪

♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪

♪ He'll give you
the answer ♪

♪ That you'll endorse ♪

♪ He's always
on a steady course ♪

♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪

- [snaps fingers]
- Ho!

[snapping]

Olé!

[Carol]
Wilbur, here's the--

All right, girls,
at the sound of the bell,

I want you both
to come out fighting.

I should have listened
to my husband and come as a Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Kay, why didn't you tell me
you were coming as Carmen?

Well, I've been trying
to phone you since last night,

but your line's been busy.

That's funny.

I haven't used the phone.

I thought so.

Wilbur, you left
the phone off the hook in the barn again.

- It must have been
that horse. - What did you say?

I mean,
he must have knocked it off accidentally.

I'll go and look.
Excuse me.

Is Wilbur coming
to the pageant?

No. Is Roger?

Well, I'm meeting
with a little resistance.

As soon as I bring up
the subject,

he locks himself
in the bathroom.

No fun without Wilbur.

I wish I could think
of some way to convince him to come along.

Well, there is a way,
darling.

What?

Before I tell you,

one of us will have to resign
from the Carmen club.

Well?

Olé!

[rapid chatting
from phone]

Uh-oh.

You left the phone
off the hook again.

So, I made a mistake.

I'm only human.

Why do you keep using
that phone?

I get lonely here
all by myself.

Well, Carol is blaming me,

and I'm getting tired
of your negligence.

Ed, it is time you
and I had a man-to-man talk.

Okay, take off the apron.

Well, I--
I was just helping Carol with the dishes.

- Wilbur.
- Yes, Roger.

Now, don't let me interrupt
your work.

I thought maybe
you'd like to play golf Saturday.

Not a bad idea.

Now, the girls will be leaving
for that parade about 12:00.

We can tell them
how beautiful they look,

how sorry we are
we can't join them,

and then laugh all the way
to the golf course.

- What do you say?
- Great.

See you later.

Hey, you know it's impossible
to get you on the telephone?

Uh-oh.

Ed, if you use that phone
once more,

I am pulling it out.
You understand?

Yes, master.

You forgot
your apron, honey.

Hey, what do you think?
Is it beautiful?

It's gorgeous.
Oh, darling, you'll make a beautiful Elaine.

Oh, thanks,
but what good is Elaine without Sir Lancelot?

Here is the book.

Just do what I told you.
Tell him he looks like Sir Lancelot.

But he doesn't.

Wilbur's too smart.
You can't soft-soap him.

It'll work.

Maybe with your husband,
but not with mine.

Oh, for heaven's sake,
Carol.

- Here he comes now.
- Okay.

- Oh, hi, Wilbur.
- Hi, honey.

Look.
Look at my new costume.

- Ooh, that's beautiful.
- Hmm.

What's the matter?

Uncanny.
What a resemblance.

- What-What? What?
- Here, let me see your profile.

Oh, I wouldn't believe it.
Carol, wait till you see.

It is simply
the most marvelous thing

I've ever seen
in all my life.

Well, here-- Let me see
the other side.

Just as good
from the other side.

Oh, it's just marvelous.
Oh, dear--

Goodbye, Kay.
Thank you very much.

[chattering]

Same face.

Bye, Kay.

It is the same face.
It is, dear.

For heaven's sake.

What-- What's
the resemblance?

Oh, it's silly.

What-wha-- What?
What's silly?

Well, Kay says you look
just like Sir Lancelot.

Hmm, what's so silly
about that?

Hmm.

Same face.
Don't you think?

Well, in that light
there is a resemblance.

Hmm? I mean,
if I had a spear in my hand,

there would be
no doubt about it.

I'll be right back.

Giddy-up.

Here's your spear, honey.

Thank you.

Oh, that's no way
to hand anybody a spear.

With a spear,
the straw goes at that end.

Charge!

Well, that's wonderful,
honey.

Now, would you show
Harold Jensen how to hold a spear?

Harold Jensen?

You're going to let
Harold Jensen be your knight at the pageant?

Oh, he doesn't look
anything like me.

No, he doesn't, dear.

I mean, who ever heard
of a pot-bellied Sir Lancelot?

Charge!

Addison,
please listen to me.

I've got to find
a Don José by tomorrow.

My dear, how about me?

Oh, you're not listening.
I-- You?

Well, of course.

I'd make
a beautiful toreador.

[speaks
foreign language]

Aha! Aho! Ahee!

Oh, Addison,
I would have never dreamed of asking you,

but you would be perfect.

Why, naturally.

I have the figure,
the bearing, the courage,

and... look at these legs.

Imagine these two beauties
in silk stockings?

Oh, Addison.
Thank you so much.

My dear,
think nothing of it

because I won't be there.

Addison,
that was a dirty trick, leading me on.

My dear, you're going to have
to find another Don José

because this bullfighter
is going to play golf Saturday.

Very well.

I won't go to the pageant.

Suit yourself, my dear.

I'm going to go
on the biggest shopping spree

you ever saw.

Where do I go
for my Don José costume?

- Hello, Ed.
- Hmm.

What's new?

Don't know.

I missed
the morning newscast.

I've tried to catch up
with you, Wilbur.

Hello, Roger.

What are you limping for?

I was practicing putting
in my back yard

for our game tomorrow,

and I twisted my ankle.

Oh, that's a shame.

I was looking forward
to beating you, too.

Sorry, old man.

- Hello, Roger.
- Hello, Carol.

Honey,
your costume will be ready in about 30 minutes.

Oh... good.

Costume?

- Didn't he tell you?
- No.

He's going to be Sir Lancelot
in the pageant.

Him? Sir Lancelot?

Oh, boy.

What's so funny?
Kay is waiting for you to try on your costume.

His costume?

- Didn't he tell you?
- No.

Well, he's coming
as Don José the bullfighter.

Aw...

- Oh, I forgot something.
- Don José the bullfighter.

Hey, that's cute.

How did you get roped
into it?

Kay hit me in my weak spot,
my money belt.

How about you?

Just stupidity.

- See you later, Lancelot.
- Bye, Don José.

Don José, Lancelot--

what fools
these mortals be.

Ed, there are times
when a man has to give in to his wife.

No wife of mine
would make me parade five miles in a hot sun.

- Now--
- Wilbur.

Here's part of the outfit
Mr. Ed's going to wear.

Oh, so Ed is going to march
in the parade, too, huh?

Well,
Elaine and Sir Lancelot need a horse,

so I figured
we might as well use Mr. Ed.

Good idea.

I mean, after all,
why should we walk five miles in a hot sun

when we can ride
on the back of good ol' Ed.

Look, aren't these pretty--
bells and tassels and plumes?

Yeah. You know, we could tie
a great, big red bow on his tail.

[no sound]

Carol,
I want to talk to you.

I tried to get you
on the phone,

but your line was busy.

- Look.
- Wilbur.

That does it.

- I warned you.
- What?

Hmm?
Uh, why, I warned you.

I did.
I warned her that if I did this once more,

I would take the phone out,
and I'm going to.

Hello, Operator?

I would like to have
an extension phone removed, please.

The name is Wilbur Post.

The address is
17340 Valley Boulevard.

[snivels]

Charge!

Hey! What are you doing?

I'm sorry.
I was just practicing with my spear.

That's nice, sonny.

Now, will you tell
your mother

the telephone man is here
to take out the phone?

[Wilbur]
Hmm? Hmm?

[no sound]

Look, I'm Mr. Post,
the owner.

The phone is in the barn.

Oh.

Right over there.

Thank you.

Why are we whispering?

I don't want him to know
the phone is coming out.

You don't?

Who?

The horse.

The horse?

He doesn't want the phone
to come out.

The horse doesn't?

That's right.

Look, sonny,
will you play with your spear

and let me
get the phone out?

Leave that phone alone.

- Blow, stupid.
- Who's that?

Where are you?

On the roof.

You want the phone
in or out?

In.
Go home.

What are you doing,
playing games with me?

Playing games?

Yeah, first you tell me
to leave the phone in,

then you tell me
to pull it out?

Make up your mind,
will you?

Oh, well, I'm sorry.

There's been
a misunderstanding.

You can take the phone out.

Oh, I must have done
something real bad when I was a kid.

Ed, that phone
is going out.

If it does,
I don't walk in the parade.

Is that supposed to be
a threat?

You can ride on a big dog,
for all I care.

You are going to be
in that parade.

You'll have to carry me.

Oh, Carol,
you look lovely.

Oh, thank you.

- So do you.
- Thank you.

Where's Roger?

Why, he's right--

Well, Addison,
come on in.

Kay, if I didn't go,

how much shopping
would you do?

Six hours
and four credit cards.

Olé.

This is the last time
I buy a suit off the rack.

At last they are putting
men up in cans.

Wilbur, all we can do
is pray for rain.

Please, this suit
is not guaranteed against rust.

We're all ready.
You better get Mr. Ed dressed.

Okay.

[grunts]

My Lancelot.

Uh-oh, here he comes.

I'm going to teach
that phone-puller a lesson.

Come on, Ed.
It's time for the parade.

It's growing dark.

Where is everybody?

Come on, Ed.
They're waiting.

I've got to get you
dressed.

Is that you, mother?

[moans]

Get up,
and stop horsing around.

I hear voices
but not on the phone.

Ed, for the last time--

Please, you're yelling
at a sick horse.

Wilbur, I brought
some extra belt--

What's wrong
with Mr. Ed?

He is perfectly all right.

[Mister Ed coughs]

But, Wilbur,
he's coughing.

Maybe I better call a vet.

There is nothing wrong
with him.

[coughs]

Then why is he coughing?

He's faking, Carol.
Believe me.

Oh, honey,
I know you're thinking of me,

but we can't go off
and leave Mr. Ed

when he's sick like that.

There will be other pageants.
Let's forget about it.

I'll go call the vet.

No. Carol, please.

Oh, that was a dirty trick.

Are you going to let her
miss that parade?

Is that you, mother?

Mother?

Oh, brother.

Kay,
I absolutely refuse to wear this ridiculous ponytail.

Darling, all bullfighters wear
that funny little hairpiece.

Some of them also get gored,

but we've got to stop
someplace.

[Carol]
Kay...

I have bad news.
Mr. Ed is sick.

Oh, the poor thing.

We can't leave him alone,

so you two better go on
without us.

Carol, you're not missing
the pageant.

I'm afraid so.

Well, well,
how do you feel today, old fellow?

[coughs]

[groans weakly]

Mm-hmm.

Doesn't look bad at all.

Nice color.

Lymph nodes
feel all right.

I still say he's faking.

Oh, you can't be
too sure of that, Mr. Post.

After all, the poor thing
can't talk, you know.

But--

Is he all right, doctor?

Heart feels fine,
sounds very good.

I think all this fellow needs
is a good shot of vitamins.

Now, don't be afraid,
old fellow.

Dr. Connors
isn't going to hurt you.

This won't hurt
one bit, now.

I told you
he was all right.

Come on, honey.
Better tell the Addisons.

Doctor, do you think
he's all right to leave for a few hours?

Oh, he seems fine.

- Well, if you're sure.
- Come on, honey.

[phone rings]

Hello.

Oh, hi, Wilbur.

Really?

Wonderful.

Oh, Addison,
the horse is all right,

and we're going
to the pageant.

Olé.

Poor Mr. Ed.

Oh, come on,
don't worry.

Dr. Connors knows
what he's doing.

Mr. Post!
Mr. Post!

Mr. Post.

What? What happened?

Your horse
pushed me down.

I think
he wanted to sit on me.

Wilbur, I just knew
there was something wrong with Mr. Ed.

But he showed
no symptoms at all.

He must be
psychologically disturbed.

Doctor, do you know
of any horse-sitting services?

Honey,
that's a wonderful idea.

Doctor,
would you mind staying with Mr. Ed till we get back?

Well, I could be back,
but it would cost you so much.

It will be worth it.

Honey, I know how
much this pageant means to you.

Yes, but we still need
a horse.

I'll rent one
from the Brunswick Stables.

They're right down the road.

You call the Addisons.
I'll be right back.

- Come on, Doctor.
- Yes.

So they got someone else.

Well, I'll fix him.

Oh, Carol,
hold still, will you?

- You're wriggling
like a fish. - [doorbell rings]

- My goodness.
- Would you please get that?

I can't get the pin in.
Wait a minute, will you?

[Carol]
Let me know if I hit your braid.

I'm Dr. Connors.

How do you do, doctor?
Come in.

[Carol]
Hello, doctor.

Sorry I couldn't get here
any sooner.

Oh, we really appreciate
you coming back.

That's perfectly all right.

Excuse me,
I'll call my husband.

Wilbur.
Dr. Connors is here.

Coming, honey.

Giddy-up, Josephine.

Honey, look.

[objects crash
and shatter]

Now we can't go.

What's the use?
I better tell the Addisons.

Don't call us.
We'll call you.

Come, Carmen.

Well, I'll tell Dr. Connors
we don't need him anymore.

[Mister Ed
whinnies]

Mr. Ed,
how do you feel, huh?

Aw, you've had a rough day,
haven't you?

I know
what's the matter with you.

You were lonesome,
weren't you?

Aw, you're a good horse.

[Wilbur]
Honey.

I didn't know
you liked Ed that much.

Well,
I feel sorry for him.

I'll bet if he knew
how happy it would make you,

he would want to go
to the pageant.

Well, I just wonder
if he's well enough.

Look.

He's his old self again.

He is.

- Tell the Addisons.
- All right.

- You tell them.
- Okay.

Let's tell them together.

- Good morning, Ed.
- Morning.

I've been thinking, Ed.

That was
a real nice gesture,

going
to the pageant yesterday.

Yeah, it sure was.

You know,
if you promise to behave,

I'll put the phone
back in the barn. Okay?

You've got my word.

Okay, I'll go in the house
and call the company.

Wilbur.

Use the phone
in the office.

Oh, okay.

Hey, who phoned the company
to put this back?

Ed.

It's growing dark.

Where is everybody?

Is that you, mother?

Muh--

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪

♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪

♪ Is the famous Mister Ed ♪

♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪

♪ He'll give you
the answer ♪

♪ That you'll endorse ♪

♪ He's always
on a steady course ♪

♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪

♪ People yakkity-yak
a streak ♪

♪ And waste
your time of day ♪

♪ But Mister Ed
will never speak ♪

♪ Unless he has
something to say ♪

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And this one will talk
till his voice is hoarse ♪

♪ You never heard
of a talking horse? ♪

♪ Well, listen to this ♪

[Mister Ed]
♪ I am Mister Ed ♪

[Man]
This has been a Filmways television presentation.