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1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:02,560
[George] I'm on my way home now.
2
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:07,960
Darling, I'm not a machine.
I need time to... refill.
3
00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:12,800
Yes. I'm wearing my baggy boxers!
4
00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:18,359
["Firewater" playing]
5
00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:30,520
[sighs]
6
00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:36,840
-[Karl] You alright?
-No, I'm exhausted.
7
00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,560
Me and the wife
are trying to get pregnant.
8
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:43,440
-Both of you?
-Four times last night, Karl. Four...
9
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:46,160
and a half. I fell asleep during,
started snoring.
10
00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:47,840
I had to pretend it was a love noise.
11
00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:50,240
Nothing's ever straightforward
with women, is it?
12
00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:52,200
[sighs] I know what you mean.
13
00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:55,600
Actually, George, I've got this friend
14
00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:59,720
who really... really fancies
this girl he works with.
15
00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:01,600
Oh yeah, where does he work?
16
00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:04,720
-In a job centre.
-Mm. Like you.
17
00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:07,200
-Yeah, exactly like me.
-Well, that's why you're friends,
18
00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:08,280
a lot in common.
19
00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:11,560
Yes. Loads. Anyway...
20
00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:14,040
my friend really wants
to ask this girl out,
21
00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:15,640
but he's not sure if she fancies him.
22
00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:19,600
Plus, she's got this really weird rule
about not dating people she works with.
23
00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:27,840
Rules are made to be broken, Karl.
Two words: carpe diem.
24
00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:31,120
It means "go for it" in German.
Your friend should just do it.
25
00:01:31,880 --> 00:01:33,480
Yeah, I'm going to.
26
00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:35,520
I mean, I'm going to tell
my friend he should just her out.
27
00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,200
I mean, he could get run over
by a bus tomorrow.
28
00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:38,560
Or fall down a well.
29
00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:41,160
Yep. Or that.
30
00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:42,240
[forced chuckle]
31
00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,720
You know who we're talking about
don't you, George?
32
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:45,640
Karl...
33
00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:50,000
I work in fraud detection.
I know how to read between the lines.
34
00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:51,080
[Karl grunts]
35
00:01:51,160 --> 00:01:52,080
[clicks tongue]
36
00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:53,200
It's Paul, isn't it?
37
00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:55,840
No.
38
00:01:56,760 --> 00:01:57,840
Graham?
39
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:01,600
He doesn't even work here.
40
00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,040
Yeah, I'll see you later, George.
41
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,480
["Work" playing]
42
00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:20,080
[haunting flute music]
43
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:31,760
-Breathe in through your nose...
-[all inhale]
44
00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:34,200
-...and out through your mouth.
-[all exhale]
45
00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:36,360
[Trish] Clear your minds.
46
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,560
-Relax.
-[snoring]
47
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:40,720
Today is all about you.
48
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,280
And earning time and a half
for working on a Saturday!
49
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:44,480
[all cheer]
50
00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,960
-[Janette and Paul chuckle]
-[Gary] Ooh, ey. [chuckles]
51
00:02:47,040 --> 00:02:50,400
[Trish] And a very warm welcome
to the staff from the Kingstanding branch.
52
00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,000
It's so nice to see so many of you here
53
00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:54,680
at this mandatory
health and well-being training event.
54
00:02:55,400 --> 00:02:58,360
And out through your mouth.
55
00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:01,200
[Gary moans]
56
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:03,880
[chuckles]
57
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:05,080
Do you want to join me, Denise?
58
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:07,680
We are meant to be running this together:
managers united.
59
00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,880
I'd love to, my darling,
but I'm a slave to my bunions.
60
00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:14,760
[Trish] And in through your nose.
61
00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:19,000
And out through your mouth.
62
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:20,560
-Hi.
-Hi.
63
00:03:21,560 --> 00:03:24,400
-Can we talk later?
-Shh, Karl, please.
64
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:28,200
The "Healthy Staff,
Happy Staff" initiative
65
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:30,960
is all about putting
your well-being first.
66
00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:32,080
[snoring loudly]
67
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,720
Mummy!
68
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:37,760
We'll be doing a number of exercises
69
00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:41,400
designed to relieve stress
and help you relax.
70
00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:43,520
Then later there'll be a refresher course
71
00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:47,000
on how to deal with
physically violent job seekers.
72
00:03:51,520 --> 00:03:52,600
What have you done?
73
00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:55,320
["Work" playing]
74
00:03:57,200 --> 00:04:00,200
No one's dead, Graham,
we're just doing some staff training.
75
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,720
Okay, I'll come back later.
76
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:05,400
No, mate,
it's Saturday, we're totally closed.
77
00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,640
That's absolutely fine, about two?
78
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:10,400
Still closed, mate. Come back Monday.
79
00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:13,240
Completely understand, Paul,
I'll see you tomorrow.
80
00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,160
["Work" playing]
81
00:04:16,240 --> 00:04:20,120
Okay, we're going to do an exercise
called "this is me, who are you?"
82
00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:22,440
-Denise.
-What?
83
00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:26,880
-Do you want to carry on?
-Oh, is it me? Oh, hang on, darlin'.
84
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:31,760
-Just tell them to get into pairs.
-Sorry, Trish, I'm lost.
85
00:04:31,840 --> 00:04:34,440
No, it's fine. Get into pairs, everyone.
86
00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:41,000
-Howdy, partner! [chuckles]
-[Natalie] What'd you want to talk about?
87
00:04:41,080 --> 00:04:43,560
It's probably the wrong time
to talk about it, actually.
88
00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:46,520
Although, when is there a right time?
I could fall down a well tomorrow.
89
00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:51,080
Karlos! Hello, mate! Eeeeh!
90
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,800
-Little bit late, aren't you?
-What? Half ten on a Saturday morning?
91
00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:57,600
-I don't normally get up till Sunday!
-Oh, perfect! You two make a lovely pair.
92
00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:00,000
Actually, Trish, me and Karl
have already partnered up.
93
00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:02,760
Well un-partner then
and work with someone new.
94
00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:06,040
You two see each other every day,
don't you want a change?
95
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,000
Well, I'll find you somebody else.
96
00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:11,520
-Tyler.
-Natalie.
97
00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:13,440
-He told me all about you.
-Yeah, what did he say?
98
00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:14,640
Just that you were fit.
99
00:05:16,280 --> 00:05:19,680
Me and Tyler have done
these training days together before.
100
00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:22,120
This bloke here... legend.
101
00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:23,960
He properly cracks me up!
102
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,440
Seriously, right, he's the funniest bloke
I've have ever met.
103
00:05:26,520 --> 00:05:28,080
We are talking about Karl, right?
104
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:31,400
-[Trish] Natalie?
-[Karl forces a laugh]
105
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:34,960
Come on, mate.
106
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:40,040
[Karl] So, you're Tyler Kerrigan,
you've worked at a job centre for--
107
00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:43,720
Karlos! Mate! You're not actually
doing this bollocks, are you?
108
00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:48,360
[chuckling] Naaaa, no. I'm only joking.
109
00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:50,720
-[Tyler] Course you are! Nutcase!
-[chuckles] Yep.
110
00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:53,200
I've got something to make the day
a bit more interesting.
111
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:56,680
Topped it up with a little
cheeky something to get us started.
112
00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:57,680
Get involved.
113
00:05:58,160 --> 00:06:01,360
-Bit early for that, isn't it?
-Nah... it's not even that strong.
114
00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:04,120
I should probably have it with food.
115
00:06:06,560 --> 00:06:09,680
That's so funny when you pretend
to be all boring like that.
116
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:14,040
[laughs] Yeah. Alright... give it here.
117
00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:18,040
Lug one dot com.
118
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,080
["Work" playing]
119
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:25,480
Okay, Angela, tell us what you've learned
about Gary from Kingstanding.
120
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:27,120
Well, his name's Gary,
121
00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:29,200
-and he's from Kingstanding.
-[grunts]
122
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:32,320
Okay. Gary,
what have you learned about Angela?
123
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:35,400
Oh, the mysterious enigma
that is Angie! [chuckles]
124
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,360
Well, she has a very dry sense of humour.
125
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,040
-But we've had a giggle, haven't we?
-No.
126
00:06:40,120 --> 00:06:42,600
I keep on knocking on the door,
but she's not going to let me in.
127
00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,000
[chuckles]
128
00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:46,600
But by the end of the day
I'm going to crack her hard shell
129
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:48,320
and find her soft centre.
130
00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:53,000
Well, good luck with that.
Natalie, would you like to report back?
131
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,720
Yes, this is Denise,
she's forty-something.
132
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:58,040
-A lady never tells.
-[both chuckle]
133
00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:00,840
She's been a manager for six years
134
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,000
and she suffers from
a number of health issues.
135
00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:05,520
Migraines, irritable bowel syndrome,
ingrown toenails--
136
00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,000
I don't like to talk about it, really.
137
00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:10,160
Well, don't, then. Tell us
what you've learnt about Natalie.
138
00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:14,040
Yes, well I have met the most lovely,
139
00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:17,200
wonderful and talented Natalie Mason--
140
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:18,560
Hello! [chuckles]
141
00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:20,480
She's deputy manager of Brownall...
142
00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:22,960
-Yay!
-...and loves the work, god bless her.
143
00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:24,440
She's saving for a flat
144
00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:27,520
and, unbelievably, she doesn't have
a boyfriend. What's that about?
145
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:30,800
Yes, well, Natalie's focused on
her career at the moment.
146
00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:32,800
Oh, Natalie, sweetheart,
you don't want to let this place
147
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:34,320
stop you finding a fella.
148
00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:36,960
You're far too lovely
to keep all to yourself.
149
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:38,680
-Aww.
-Yeah, I would.
150
00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:40,760
-Thanks.
-There's plenty of time
151
00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:41,840
for romance later.
152
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:44,720
You want to be regional manager
by the time you're 30, don't you, Natalie?
153
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,920
Can't I have a boyfriend
and be regional manager?
154
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,480
No, you can't.
155
00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:50,840
What if she meets the right person now?
156
00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:53,600
She might only get one chance
in this life to find true happiness.
157
00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,480
Okay, let's move on,
this isn't Dawson's Creek.
158
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:59,520
But that's what this day's about,
isn't it though, Trish, my lovely darling?
159
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,160
You can't let work take over your life.
160
00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:03,880
Yeah, and you can't let life
ruin your career.
161
00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:08,200
I'm single, I'm successful,
and I am very happy.
162
00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:11,440
Right... I'm happy.
163
00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:16,040
Are we happy? I'm happy.
164
00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:21,520
So let's hail yourselves a relaxi taxi.
165
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:23,600
It's massage time.
166
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:27,560
["Orinoco Flow" playing]
167
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:31,760
Is that good?
168
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,279
Am I doing it right?
169
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:35,720
Yeah, that feels nice.
170
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:38,840
Bit harder, maybe.
171
00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:40,760
Harder. Okay.
172
00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:44,560
Shall I go faster?
173
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:48,920
Karl, if you could stop manhandling
Natalie for a moment,
174
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:50,240
I'd like a word with her.
175
00:08:56,360 --> 00:08:59,040
Oh. Are my eyes deceiving me? [chuckles]
176
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:01,840
It looks like a beautiful young woman
has been left without a partner.
177
00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:06,520
Get your fat fingers off me
or I will damage you.
178
00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:11,760
[laughs] Oh, you do make
me laugh, Angie. Come on.
179
00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:14,960
Oh, that is... really relaxing.
180
00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:17,680
Oof. It's like your fingers
are melting into my back.
181
00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:19,920
[moans] Relax, just go with it, mate.
182
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:22,880
Seriously, it's like warm...
183
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,440
custard is being poured all over my body.
184
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:28,480
I love coming up on ketamine.
185
00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:30,640
-Yeah!
-Yeah.
186
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,880
Sorry, what…? What did you say, ketamine?
187
00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:33,840
[Tyler] Yeah, in the drink.
188
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:35,920
Oh, did you think it was pills?
189
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,080
No, I thought it was vodka.
190
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:41,280
[laughs] You're proper funny man.
You have done K before, haven't you?
191
00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:43,640
No, no I haven't.
I mean, call me old-fashioned,
192
00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:46,560
but I don't usually have
horse tranquilizer for breakfast.
193
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:51,200
Ahh, you had me going then.
194
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,200
Ah, bear jokes.
195
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:58,840
Oh, f... shit. Oh... fuck.
196
00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:01,000
Natalie, there's no delicate way
of saying this,
197
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:02,760
but I think Karl finds you
sexually attractive.
198
00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,280
-Trish--
-So obviously you need to be separated.
199
00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:08,240
Separated? We're not naughty children.
200
00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:09,760
What about the rule?
201
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,680
Dating a colleague
is a disaster waiting to happen.
202
00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:16,000
-I'm only thinking of you.
-Are you?
203
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:21,000
["Work" playing]
204
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:26,320
-[knock on door]
-Trish?
205
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:28,360
Oh, Natalie, sweetheart,
can we have a private chat?
206
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:30,440
I just want to talk about your future.
207
00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:31,840
Can we go in here?
208
00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:34,720
[Natalie] Yep.
209
00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:39,120
What's this about?
210
00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:41,240
Is everything alright,
my beautiful darling?
211
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:42,680
And stop me
if I'm talking out of line here,
212
00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:44,400
but I sense some tension
between you and Trish.
213
00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:46,360
Oh, is it that noticeable?
214
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:47,920
Talk to me, Natalie.
Tell me your troubles.
215
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,440
We all know Trish can occasionally
be impossible to work with.
216
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,480
[Natalie] No, it's not that.
217
00:10:52,560 --> 00:10:55,600
It's just she's got this rule about
not dating your work colleagues,
218
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:58,520
and I think I've sort of fallen
for one of mine.
219
00:10:58,600 --> 00:10:59,640
Is it George?
220
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,000
The gorgeous fraud officer with the beard
you could hang onto for dear life?
221
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:07,280
No. It's Karl. The sort of
funny-looking, clean-shaven one.
222
00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:10,960
Oh, I see. Then why don't you
come and work for me, my lovely?
223
00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:13,640
I'm rarely there,
what with my health problems.
224
00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:15,640
If it's not my feet, it's my migraines.
225
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:18,320
And… [whispers]
I'm going through the change.
226
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:22,040
There's some days I'm just too emotional
to come in. I cry at tampon adverts.
227
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,000
What do you think?
228
00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,240
Would I still be deputy manager
at Kingstanding?
229
00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:29,520
And acting manager when I was away.
And I don't care who you have sex with.
230
00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:32,800
-Brilliant, I'll have sex with everyone!
-[both laugh]
231
00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:33,720
[whispers] Natalie.
232
00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,480
Can I think about it?
We should probably get back.
233
00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:39,280
Oh, Trish has left her keys.
234
00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,560
[keys jingle]
235
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,760
[door closes and locks]
236
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:48,840
-[panting] Don't be locked in.
-[door rattles]
237
00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:54,760
Oh, Trish. Oh God, okay.
It's alright, Trish, keep calm.
238
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,520
I didn't mean to take it,
it was in a drink.
239
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:00,280
No, I'm not at a rave.
240
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:03,760
I'm at a health
and well-being training event.
241
00:12:05,520 --> 00:12:07,080
Yes, I can see the irony.
242
00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:09,960
Right. Oh... oh...
243
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:13,160
[breathes heavily] Oh, well, what's…
what's going to happen?
244
00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:15,320
I'm starting to feel floppy.
245
00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:18,280
-[computer thuds]
-Hello, Natalie.
246
00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:21,480
Hi, have you seen Trish anywhere?
We're going to start back.
247
00:12:21,560 --> 00:12:22,960
Trish? Um...
248
00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:27,320
No, no, I have not seen Trish,
not at all. Natalie.
249
00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:31,240
-Alright.
-[Karl] Goodbye, Natalie.
250
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:38,520
Does it have to be today?
251
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:43,800
Please don't call me names.
Some men find that word offensive.
252
00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:47,160
[phone vibrating]
253
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:49,480
Someone's keen.
254
00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,720
Sometimes, Paul,
I think life would be easier
255
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:54,120
if I just went and lived alone
in the woods.
256
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,040
-Where would you sleep?
-I'd fashion a bivouac
257
00:12:56,120 --> 00:12:57,880
-out of leaves and moss.
-[Paul guffaws]
258
00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,360
You've never even been camping,
what's brought this on?
259
00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:02,200
Tanya's booked me in for a sperm test.
260
00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,320
-She thinks I'm firing blanks.
-I see.
261
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:06,840
I went for a test before,
but I couldn't do it.
262
00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:08,440
Too much pressure at the clinic.
263
00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:10,800
I don't perform well under stress.
264
00:13:13,680 --> 00:13:14,760
They gave me this to fill.
265
00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:18,080
I don't think you have to fill it, mate.
You're not a whale.
266
00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:19,600
If I go home without a sample,
267
00:13:19,680 --> 00:13:22,600
Tanya will make sure
that I've got nothing to do a sample with.
268
00:13:22,680 --> 00:13:25,840
Why don't you take yourself off
to the disabled toilet for five minutes?
269
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:29,120
It's perfect for some
"private gentleman time."
270
00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:31,240
And they've got a mirror.
271
00:13:34,840 --> 00:13:35,680
Oh...
272
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:38,960
["Work" playing]
273
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:41,880
I am off my chops.
274
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:43,760
I feel sort of terrified.
275
00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:47,720
[breathing heavily] My...
my leg's gone wobbly.
276
00:13:49,080 --> 00:13:52,120
-I think your phone's ringing.
-Aaah. [chuckles]
277
00:13:53,080 --> 00:13:54,680
-[phone vibrates]
-[laughs]
278
00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:56,760
Trish is phoning me.
279
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:59,480
Yeah. You going to answer it?
280
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:00,600
No.
281
00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:04,480
Oh, my phone feels like a sponge.
282
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,840
[Tyler] Squashy. Like a boob.
283
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,920
Yes. Yes, a boob.
284
00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:10,840
I like boobs.
285
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:13,960
[sighs heavily]
286
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,240
-[thud]
-[Trish] Ow.
287
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:23,040
Come on. Think, Trish, think.
288
00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:31,600
There's still no sign of Trish.
So, Denise, do you want to take over?
289
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:33,320
Oh, not really.
290
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,000
-Why don't you do it, you'll be brilliant?
-Okay, then.
291
00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:39,000
-Sure you can manage?
-Yes, thanks.
292
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:43,600
We are going to play a fun game
of healthy eating Pictionary.
293
00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:44,480
Ugh.
294
00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:47,400
["Shake A Fist" playing]
295
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,280
[Trish grunts] Come on...
296
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:00,720
I will not let her take my Natalie.
297
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,320
Come on, Trish.
298
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,040
[Trish grunts]
299
00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:16,760
[panting]
300
00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:21,120
Oh, it's a candle!
301
00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,320
Candle? Yes, it's a candle.
302
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:25,280
I mean, it looks like a candle.
303
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:27,480
Is it a candle?
304
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,520
[hesitating]
305
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:32,000
-Candle.
-Stop saying "candle."
306
00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:33,240
It's all healthy food.
307
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:34,760
Is it corn on the cob?
308
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,040
-No.
-I thought you had an art degree.
309
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:40,200
Finger of fudge.
310
00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:42,720
No, it's healthy food. Karl, what is it?
311
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,840
It's... a banana.
312
00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:49,280
-[chuckles]
-Oh, I thought it looked like a candle.
313
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:52,440
-What do you think it looked like, Angie?
-A penis.
314
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:53,840
Oh.
315
00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,000
["Tchaparian" playing]
316
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,040
-George?
-[George moans]
317
00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:20,000
-What on earth are you...
-[rhythmic rubbing]
318
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,000
-Oh, sweet Lord Jesus.
-[George moans]
319
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:26,040
Physical restraining techniques
should only be used as a last resort.
320
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,120
But if the claimant gets ugly,
you've got to bring him down.
321
00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:32,240
[groaning] You like to be in charge,
don't you, Angie?
322
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:34,720
-I could crush you with my thighs.
-[chuckles]
323
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,080
-That's not right, Angela.
-I know what I'm doing.
324
00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:39,480
Karl, will you be a volunteer for me?
325
00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:42,280
Oh no. Sorry. Toilet time.
326
00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:49,920
-George. Let's show them how it's done.
-No, I can't, not right-- [groans loudly]
327
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:51,960
Ow! Ow! Ow!
328
00:16:52,040 --> 00:16:54,560
-[door squeaks open]
-[Karl muttering nonsense]
329
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:58,440
No, this isn't good. No this isn't good.
330
00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,800
-[Trish] Karl.
-Huh?
331
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:03,720
-Hello?
-It's me.
332
00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:05,960
Who's "me"? There's no one else here.
333
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:07,560
Karl. Up here.
334
00:17:09,599 --> 00:17:14,079
-Help me.
-Why is the ceiling made of your face?
335
00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,920
-Get me down.
-No...
336
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:18,000
you're not real.
337
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:22,360
-This is not real.
-[Trish] Of course, I'm real.
338
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:25,480
I'm dirty and hot and real.
Now get me down.
339
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:30,040
No, you're in my head.
You're just a Mind Trish!
340
00:17:30,120 --> 00:17:31,880
Oh, for goodness' sake!
341
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:34,640
-[Karl groans]
-Karl! Karl!
342
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:38,600
[door squeaks open]
343
00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:40,600
[sighs] Ruddy heck.
344
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,040
There you are. Look, I need to talk
to you about something.
345
00:17:46,120 --> 00:17:48,400
Oh hello, Natalie,
what do you want to talk about?
346
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:50,640
I'm thinking of leaving Brownall.
347
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:53,080
No, why?
348
00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:56,200
Well, I...
349
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:59,280
actually quite like you a bit.
350
00:18:00,120 --> 00:18:03,360
And I think that you like me.
351
00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:08,720
[stuttering] Yeah, I do, I really do.
I do like you, a lot.
352
00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:12,320
[laughs] Good. But that rule
about never dating people from work,
353
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,160
that was never mine, that's Trish.
354
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,560
And if I go to Kingstanding, then...
355
00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:20,000
we could be together.
356
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:22,800
I really want that.
357
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:26,960
Ever since I met you
I've wanted to kiss you.
358
00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:29,640
Why don't you, then?
359
00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:35,000
Because I know you're not real.
360
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:37,960
You're like floaty Trish,
you're just an hallucination.
361
00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:40,880
Karl, you are being really weird.
What is wrong with you?
362
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:42,040
I have taken ketamine.
363
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:44,960
What? Why? Have you lost your mind?
364
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,000
It was not on purpose.
Tyler gave it to me in a drink.
365
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:52,280
Now I'm seeing things.
My hand will go straight through you.
366
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:56,200
Although you do feel remarkably solid.
367
00:18:58,440 --> 00:18:59,600
Can you feel that?
368
00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:03,600
Yeah.
369
00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,480
["Jasmine" playing]
370
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,280
Can you feel that?
371
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:22,840
Mm-hm. I think so.
372
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,120
Can we do it again just to make sure?
373
00:19:27,160 --> 00:19:28,320
[chuckles]
374
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:39,120
Ow!
375
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,200
The threat has been neutralized
with the minimum of distress
376
00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:44,640
-for both parties.
-[Gary moans]
377
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:46,160
Denise, can I have a quick word?
378
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:48,680
-Have you made up your mind?
-Can we just...?
379
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,720
[George groaning loudly] Janette...
380
00:19:52,360 --> 00:19:55,760
Please get off me. My sperms are dying.
381
00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,000
So I've given it a lot of thought,
382
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,280
and it is a great opportunity for me.
383
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:03,040
[Denise] You're going to love it
at Kingstanding.
384
00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:05,440
-Right, that's it!
-[Denise] You can...
385
00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:06,680
-Back off, Denise.
-[Natalie] Yes, well...
386
00:20:06,760 --> 00:20:08,280
Get your hands off my Natalie!
387
00:20:08,360 --> 00:20:10,000
["Work" playing]
388
00:20:15,760 --> 00:20:18,240
[Trish] I hope you're ready for Trish!
389
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,880
Oh shit.
390
00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:24,000
[Natalie] I could probably start
next month, I think.
391
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:26,280
Back off, Denise.
392
00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:28,040
[employee chatter stops abruptly]
393
00:20:28,120 --> 00:20:29,600
Trish, where've you been?
394
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:32,560
I have been in the ceiling,
thank you very much for asking,
395
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:34,840
while she has been stealing my staff.
396
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:38,000
I'm not stealing her!
I'm offering her an opportunity.
397
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:38,960
Trish, my darling.
398
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,520
Okay, two things:
I am not, nor ever will be, your darling,
399
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:42,600
so stop calling me that.
400
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:45,040
You only want Natalie
because she'll do all the work
401
00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:47,280
while you sit at home
on your arse on "sick leave."
402
00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:48,840
[Denise] Do not upset me, Trish.
403
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,120
If my IBS flares up
there will be hell to pay.
404
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:53,640
Now, Natalie you're coming
to Kingstanding, aren't you?
405
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:56,080
No, you can't go! I don't want you to go.
406
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:57,200
I do.
407
00:20:57,880 --> 00:20:59,880
I'm sorry, Trish.
I really like working here,
408
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:01,440
but I like Karl, too.
409
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:02,880
Yeah, she just kissed me.
410
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,120
Yeah boy!
411
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:05,920
-Aha.
-Woo!
412
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:12,440
Okay... sod me and my silly rules.
What do I know?
413
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:14,320
Natalie, stay.
414
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:16,720
Be my deputy manager.
415
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,120
You can do whatever the hell
you want with Karl.
416
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:23,880
But obviously no French kissing
in front of the job seekers.
417
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:27,200
Well, in that case, I'm sorry, Denise,
but I'm staying at Brownall.
418
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:28,280
-Yes!
-[Denise grunts]
419
00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:31,600
In your face, Denise.
420
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,640
["Baby I'm Yours" playing]
421
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,720
Right. Kingstanding,
get your things, we are leaving.
422
00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:41,480
[Natalie and Trish chuckle]
423
00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:44,000
-Let's see, you're going?
-Kingstanding.
424
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:45,920
No. You're coming home with me.
425
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,680
Right. Okay, why?
426
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,360
To find my soft centre.
427
00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:52,680
Oh! Oh!
428
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:55,160
Janette, I think I'm going to be sick.
429
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:58,160
Oh, sorry, George,
I forgot you were there.
430
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:00,080
-[back cracks]
-[moans loudly]
431
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:02,760
Right, I have been in the ceiling
for an hour and a half,
432
00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:04,280
I think I need a colossal gin.
433
00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:07,080
Come on, Team Brownall,
I'm buying. [giggles]
434
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:08,880
Woot woot!
435
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,160
Alright, George, you coming?
436
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:19,960
Give me five minutes.
437
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:25,840
-[bangs arm loudly]
-[Natalie] Oh!
438
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:30,960
["Baby I'm Yours" playing]
33538
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