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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,296 --> 00:00:09,193 I'm, like, stoked right now.I bet you are. I know you. 2 00:00:09,296 --> 00:00:11,331 Clancy! Welcome back! How was your vacation? 3 00:00:11,434 --> 00:00:14,089 Oh, it was amazing. Thank you guys so much for the itinerary. 4 00:00:14,193 --> 00:00:15,400 Now, tell me you went to that café. 5 00:00:15,503 --> 00:00:16,572 Oh, best biscotti I've ever had. 6 00:00:16,676 --> 00:00:18,331 That biscotti ruined me for American biscotti. 7 00:00:18,434 --> 00:00:20,262 Did you go on the hike?Yes! Oh, the vista! 8 00:00:20,365 --> 00:00:21,917 All the vistas in America are trash. 9 00:00:22,021 --> 00:00:24,641 Did you --Yes. Amazing. 10 00:00:24,745 --> 00:00:26,469 What is this place? 11 00:00:26,572 --> 00:00:27,883 [ Gasps ] 12 00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:29,814 Oh, Kate. 13 00:00:29,917 --> 00:00:32,262 The beauty is indescribable, 14 00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:33,779 but here's what it looked like. 15 00:00:33,883 --> 00:00:35,193 It's God's country. 16 00:00:35,296 --> 00:00:36,986 I'm gonna have an eighth of my ashes scattered there. 17 00:00:37,089 --> 00:00:38,538 [ Whispering ] You've seen trees before, 18 00:00:38,641 --> 00:00:40,158 but when you go there, you'll realize 19 00:00:40,262 --> 00:00:42,848 you had no fucking clue what trees were. 20 00:00:42,952 --> 00:00:45,538 [ Normal voice ] They call it Trivallo. 21 00:00:45,641 --> 00:00:46,952 Trivallo? Unh-unh. 22 00:00:47,055 --> 00:00:50,158 Together: Tri-vaaaaaah-o. 23 00:00:50,262 --> 00:00:52,021 It's economically decimated. 24 00:00:52,124 --> 00:00:54,469 But culturally, it's bursting with riches. 25 00:00:54,572 --> 00:00:57,676 I bought a magnet with my name on it. 26 00:00:57,779 --> 00:00:58,848 There's this restaurant. 27 00:00:58,952 --> 00:01:00,227 It's in the ocean. You have to try it. 28 00:01:00,331 --> 00:01:02,952 Now, you're gonna get wet, but that's part of it. 29 00:01:03,055 --> 00:01:05,641 [ Whispering ] You must try the Eucharist at the cathedral. 30 00:01:05,745 --> 00:01:07,469 It ruined me for American Eucharist. 31 00:01:07,572 --> 00:01:09,193 [ Normal voice ] Best ruins I've ever seen. 32 00:01:09,296 --> 00:01:10,779 Ruined me for American ruins. 33 00:01:10,883 --> 00:01:12,262 Now, I don't wanna oversell it, 34 00:01:12,365 --> 00:01:15,400 but let's just say you are finally gonna understand 35 00:01:15,503 --> 00:01:18,193 why I started spelling "color" with a "U." 36 00:01:18,296 --> 00:01:22,089 [ Cheers and applause ] 37 00:01:22,193 --> 00:01:24,158 Goodbye, everyone! 38 00:01:24,262 --> 00:01:26,607 I'm off to Trivallo! 39 00:01:26,710 --> 00:01:30,055 [ Cheers and applause ] 40 00:01:30,158 --> 00:01:33,641 [ Birds chirping ] 41 00:01:38,365 --> 00:01:41,848 [ Biscotti crunches ] 42 00:01:46,055 --> 00:01:50,400 [ Coughing ] 43 00:01:50,503 --> 00:01:51,710 So... 44 00:01:51,814 --> 00:01:53,676 how was it? 45 00:01:53,779 --> 00:01:56,331 It was... 46 00:01:56,434 --> 00:02:01,745 ♪♪ 47 00:02:01,848 --> 00:02:03,676 ...amazing! 48 00:02:03,779 --> 00:02:05,779 [ All sigh ] 49 00:02:05,883 --> 00:02:08,745 You two have to go. 50 00:02:08,848 --> 00:02:10,883 Nah. Okay. 51 00:02:10,986 --> 00:02:16,158 ♪♪ 52 00:02:30,296 --> 00:02:31,745 [ Telephone ringing ] 53 00:02:31,848 --> 00:02:33,952 Ooh! 54 00:02:34,055 --> 00:02:36,296 Matt! Calling me so soon? 55 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:37,986 I guess you're already bored of the vacation 56 00:02:38,089 --> 00:02:39,434 you went into credit-card debt to take. 57 00:02:39,538 --> 00:02:41,296 Oh, it's beautiful here. 58 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:43,883 The energy in the air is just different. 59 00:02:43,986 --> 00:02:45,469 The people here are very... 60 00:02:45,572 --> 00:02:46,710 European. 61 00:02:46,814 --> 00:02:47,848 It's hard to describe, 62 00:02:47,952 --> 00:02:49,986 but I definitely like it better than America. 63 00:02:50,089 --> 00:02:51,710 I hope you enjoy pretending to have fun 64 00:02:51,814 --> 00:02:53,814 while I enjoy having the office all to myself. 65 00:02:53,917 --> 00:02:55,814 Yeah, right. You miss me. Say it. 66 00:02:55,917 --> 00:02:57,124 Say you miss me. 67 00:02:57,227 --> 00:02:58,434 Matt, I'm sure of two things in this world -- 68 00:02:58,538 --> 00:03:00,021 I will die of a stroke in a condo 69 00:03:00,124 --> 00:03:01,676 and I will not miss you this week. 70 00:03:01,779 --> 00:03:04,607 By the way, did you sign up for an international calling plan? 71 00:03:04,710 --> 00:03:06,158 If not, this call is costing you a fortune. 72 00:03:06,262 --> 00:03:07,710 Damn it! Okay, I'm gonna hang up.Oh, my God, is that Matt? 73 00:03:07,814 --> 00:03:08,745 Let me talk to him. 74 00:03:08,848 --> 00:03:10,779 Hey, pal, how's the vacation going? 75 00:03:10,883 --> 00:03:12,469 You soaking it all in? 76 00:03:12,572 --> 00:03:14,572 Is he soaking it all in? He's soaking it all in. 77 00:03:14,676 --> 00:03:16,089 Put him on speaker! Okay. 78 00:03:16,193 --> 00:03:17,469 You're on speaker, bud, pipe up! 79 00:03:17,572 --> 00:03:18,917 Matt: It's going great. 80 00:03:19,021 --> 00:03:21,089 The only downside is the airline lost my luggage, 81 00:03:21,193 --> 00:03:23,676 so I don't have anything other than the clothes I'm wearing. 82 00:03:23,779 --> 00:03:25,848 Same thing happened to me. Here's what you gotta do. 83 00:03:25,952 --> 00:03:28,676 There's this little boutique called Fellini's. Fellini's. 84 00:03:28,779 --> 00:03:31,572 Drop my name to Carlo, and he'll cut you a great deal. 85 00:03:31,676 --> 00:03:33,124 Okay, great. Um, I gotta go, but -- 86 00:03:33,227 --> 00:03:34,641 Real quick, buddy, before we let you go -- 87 00:03:34,745 --> 00:03:36,848 we're still waiting on that efficacy report 88 00:03:36,952 --> 00:03:38,193 we asked you to finish. 89 00:03:38,296 --> 00:03:40,055 So why don't you hop on that ASAP, 90 00:03:40,158 --> 00:03:41,710 and then you can just marinade 91 00:03:41,814 --> 00:03:44,538 in the sights and sounds of Trivallo. 92 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,262 [ Jackhammer pounding ] 93 00:03:47,365 --> 00:03:49,986 Jake, we're glad to have you here focused on work, 94 00:03:50,089 --> 00:03:53,400 unlike Matt, who doesn't seem to care about his job at all. 95 00:03:53,503 --> 00:03:56,227 We figured you'd be a little lonely without Matt 96 00:03:56,331 --> 00:03:57,538 and could use some company. 97 00:03:57,641 --> 00:03:59,055 Actually, I was really looking forward -- 98 00:03:59,158 --> 00:04:00,607 Rick! 99 00:04:00,710 --> 00:04:01,883 Get in here. 100 00:04:01,986 --> 00:04:03,503 There's the guy! 101 00:04:03,607 --> 00:04:06,021 There's our star player. 102 00:04:06,124 --> 00:04:09,055 There's our stud. 103 00:04:09,158 --> 00:04:10,262 Yeah. 104 00:04:10,365 --> 00:04:12,124 So, uh, here's the thing -- 105 00:04:12,227 --> 00:04:14,296 we found some black mold in Rick's office. 106 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,124 Black mold is an understatement. 107 00:04:16,227 --> 00:04:17,434 So while we sort that out, 108 00:04:17,538 --> 00:04:19,400 we're gonna let him shack up with you. 109 00:04:19,503 --> 00:04:22,365 Rick is our most productive employee. 110 00:04:22,469 --> 00:04:23,745 He has never taken a vacation 111 00:04:23,848 --> 00:04:25,538 and refuses to use a sick day. 112 00:04:25,641 --> 00:04:27,572 Actually, you remind us a lot of Rick. 113 00:04:27,676 --> 00:04:30,158 Just don't touch him or inhale his breath. 114 00:04:30,262 --> 00:04:34,124 We think you two are going to get along like fish in a barrel. 115 00:04:34,227 --> 00:04:35,641 Wait. 116 00:04:35,745 --> 00:04:37,434 [ Sighs ] 117 00:04:37,538 --> 00:04:42,296 So, Rick, you gonna sue 'em for that black mold or what? 118 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,779 [ Snorts, coughs ] 119 00:04:44,883 --> 00:04:49,572 [ Birds chirping ] 120 00:04:49,676 --> 00:04:51,572 ♪♪ 121 00:04:51,676 --> 00:04:54,814 [ Sighs ] 122 00:04:54,917 --> 00:05:00,710 ♪♪ 123 00:05:01,710 --> 00:05:04,641 There's a disturbing amount of plants in here, Grace. 124 00:05:04,745 --> 00:05:09,158 Jake, let me introduce you to some of my new friends. 125 00:05:09,262 --> 00:05:11,503 This is Succulent, he's the star. 126 00:05:11,607 --> 00:05:14,434 This is Fern, the heartthrob with great hair. 127 00:05:14,538 --> 00:05:17,158 This is Cactus, he does not like to be pet. 128 00:05:17,262 --> 00:05:19,986 Personifying your plants is a major sign of depression. 129 00:05:20,089 --> 00:05:21,331 I amdepressed. 130 00:05:21,434 --> 00:05:22,814 I used up all my vacation days 131 00:05:22,917 --> 00:05:24,986 going to my friends' weddings and funerals. 132 00:05:25,089 --> 00:05:27,641 And now whenever I try to take unpaid vacation, 133 00:05:27,745 --> 00:05:30,434 there's some new office molester I have to deal with. 134 00:05:30,538 --> 00:05:32,676 Oh, yeah, Trent... and then Billy. 135 00:05:32,779 --> 00:05:34,814 People weren't meant to be in offices. 136 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:37,021 We were made to live in the forest. 137 00:05:37,124 --> 00:05:38,331 Oh, and Brooks. 138 00:05:38,434 --> 00:05:41,021 Like Adam and Steve or the Unabomber. 139 00:05:41,124 --> 00:05:42,193 Right, Fern? 140 00:05:42,296 --> 00:05:44,296 That's right, Grace. 141 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:46,365 I love the forest! 142 00:05:46,469 --> 00:05:48,331 What do you say to that, Jake? 143 00:05:48,434 --> 00:05:50,400 You're living a lie. 144 00:05:50,503 --> 00:05:53,883 [ Indistinct conversations ] 145 00:05:53,986 --> 00:05:56,434 [ Coughing ] 146 00:05:56,538 --> 00:05:59,883 [ Cellphone ringing ] 147 00:05:59,986 --> 00:06:01,296 Hello? 148 00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:02,710 John: Matt! 149 00:06:02,814 --> 00:06:04,952 How's it going?Oh, good. 150 00:06:05,055 --> 00:06:07,055 I was just about to eat the biscotti. 151 00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:08,400 Oh, the biscotti! 152 00:06:08,503 --> 00:06:09,745 Let us hear you take a bite! 153 00:06:09,848 --> 00:06:11,262 Yeah, give us a taste of Trivallo. 154 00:06:11,365 --> 00:06:12,779 We wanna hear that crunch. 155 00:06:12,883 --> 00:06:14,883 Yes, yes, please, a little bit.Give us that crunch. 156 00:06:14,986 --> 00:06:17,021 Matt: Uh, okay. 157 00:06:19,089 --> 00:06:20,227 [ Biscotti crunches ] 158 00:06:20,331 --> 00:06:22,779 [ All sighing, moaning ]Oh, yes! 159 00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:24,227 Yeah, baby. 160 00:06:24,331 --> 00:06:26,227 Masticate, Matt. Masticate, Matt. 161 00:06:26,331 --> 00:06:27,469 God damn it! 162 00:06:27,572 --> 00:06:30,021 Now let's hear you really chew it up! 163 00:06:30,124 --> 00:06:31,331 It's a little dry. 164 00:06:31,434 --> 00:06:32,676 It is dry, isn't it? 165 00:06:32,779 --> 00:06:34,883 You better believe it is, so fucking dry. 166 00:06:34,986 --> 00:06:36,193 Now, Matt? Matt? 167 00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:37,676 Do me a favor, buddy. 168 00:06:37,779 --> 00:06:40,055 Now wash it down with some of that inky... 169 00:06:40,158 --> 00:06:41,400 [ Groans ] ...black... 170 00:06:41,503 --> 00:06:44,331 [ Groans ]...espresso, Matt. 171 00:06:44,434 --> 00:06:46,538 Sip that espresso, baby. 172 00:06:46,641 --> 00:06:50,883 [ Matt slurps, all moan ] 173 00:06:50,986 --> 00:06:52,745 [ Laughs ] 174 00:06:52,848 --> 00:06:55,503 John: Sounds thick. Sounds thick. 175 00:06:55,607 --> 00:06:58,158 How incredible was that? [ Breathing heavily ] 176 00:06:58,262 --> 00:07:00,676 It's incredible.Incredible. 177 00:07:00,779 --> 00:07:01,952 Hoo! 178 00:07:02,055 --> 00:07:03,814 Anyway, buddy, we noticed a typo in your last e-mail. 179 00:07:03,917 --> 00:07:05,917 We're a little worried you don't have your head in the game. 180 00:07:06,021 --> 00:07:07,883 It's almost like you're somewhere else. 181 00:07:07,986 --> 00:07:09,538 You're dropping the ball, buddy. 182 00:07:09,641 --> 00:07:11,641 And it's starting to torque me off. 183 00:07:11,745 --> 00:07:13,814 Oh! But while you're at the café, 184 00:07:13,917 --> 00:07:15,469 you must say hi to Pierro for me! 185 00:07:15,572 --> 00:07:17,607 Oh! Promise us you'll say hi.Do it. 186 00:07:17,710 --> 00:07:19,124 Okay, I promise. 187 00:07:19,227 --> 00:07:21,641 Ciao! Ciao! 188 00:07:22,469 --> 00:07:24,779 Excuse me. Sí? 189 00:07:24,883 --> 00:07:28,124 Uh, is there an employee here named Pierro? 190 00:07:28,227 --> 00:07:29,779 Oh, sí. 191 00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:31,400 Pierro! 192 00:07:31,503 --> 00:07:36,503 [ Both shouting in Italian ] 193 00:07:36,607 --> 00:07:38,883 You no like my biscotti? 194 00:07:38,986 --> 00:07:40,952 Oh, no. The biscotti's great. 195 00:07:41,055 --> 00:07:44,331 It's just that, um, John says hi. 196 00:07:44,434 --> 00:07:47,365 Who? John. 197 00:07:47,469 --> 00:07:49,469 What? Um... 198 00:07:49,572 --> 00:07:51,641 this is John. 199 00:07:51,745 --> 00:07:54,296 He -- He ate here once. 200 00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:56,296 Yeah? 201 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:59,021 Well, he says hi. 202 00:07:59,124 --> 00:08:02,055 We need this table for other customers. 203 00:08:02,158 --> 00:08:05,193 You need to eat the biscotti and leave. 204 00:08:05,296 --> 00:08:06,400 Ciao. 205 00:08:06,503 --> 00:08:11,986 [ Coughing ] 206 00:08:13,745 --> 00:08:15,469 Thank you for the water, Grace! 207 00:08:15,572 --> 00:08:17,400 You're my best friend! 208 00:08:17,503 --> 00:08:19,641 You're my best friend, too, Fern! 209 00:08:19,745 --> 00:08:22,055 You're my mom, Grace! 210 00:08:22,158 --> 00:08:23,296 Aww. 211 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:26,296 You're Mommy's special guy, Cactus! 212 00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:28,434 You're my ex, Grace! 213 00:08:28,538 --> 00:08:32,055 I'm glad we left on good terms, Succulent. 214 00:08:32,158 --> 00:08:34,469 Oh, no! 215 00:08:34,572 --> 00:08:37,503 What's this? Succulent, you're sick? 216 00:08:37,607 --> 00:08:39,503 Why didn't you tell me? 217 00:08:39,607 --> 00:08:41,021 We're broken up. 218 00:08:41,124 --> 00:08:43,331 You're not entitled to every detail of my life anymore. 219 00:08:43,434 --> 00:08:45,296 Well, I'm still gonna take care of you. 220 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,434 I thought succulents were supposed to be low-maintenance. 221 00:08:48,538 --> 00:08:50,710 Not now, Orchid! 222 00:08:50,814 --> 00:08:57,952 ♪♪ 223 00:09:15,779 --> 00:09:22,021 [ Grunting, wind whistling ] 224 00:09:22,124 --> 00:09:25,434 [ Hawk cries ] 225 00:09:25,538 --> 00:09:29,365 ♪♪ 226 00:09:29,469 --> 00:09:31,089 [ Chuckles ] 227 00:09:31,193 --> 00:09:35,227 ♪♪ 228 00:09:35,331 --> 00:09:38,883 [ Keyboard clicking ] 229 00:09:38,986 --> 00:09:42,434 ♪♪ 230 00:09:42,538 --> 00:09:44,193 ♪ I'm a little cucumber 231 00:09:44,296 --> 00:09:45,710 [ Chuckles ] That's right, guys, it's me, Little Cucumber. 232 00:09:45,814 --> 00:09:47,158 I'm here in Trivello -- 233 00:09:47,262 --> 00:09:48,572 Fuck! God damn it! 234 00:09:48,676 --> 00:09:49,814 It's Trivallo, Trivallo. 235 00:09:49,917 --> 00:09:51,814 You know that. [ Sighs ] 236 00:09:51,917 --> 00:09:54,158 ♪ I'm a little cucumber 237 00:09:54,262 --> 00:09:56,124 [ Laughs ] Hey, guys, it's me, Little Cucumber! 238 00:09:56,227 --> 00:09:58,331 I am here having the best time here in Trivello. 239 00:09:58,434 --> 00:10:00,055 [ Cellphone chimes ]Trivallo! 240 00:10:00,158 --> 00:10:03,262 This is why you're losing all your fucking subscribers! 241 00:10:03,365 --> 00:10:04,503 ♪ I'm a little cucumber 242 00:10:04,607 --> 00:10:05,779 [ Chuckles ] Hi, guys! 243 00:10:05,883 --> 00:10:07,814 I'm having the time of my life. 244 00:10:07,917 --> 00:10:08,986 Fuck! 245 00:10:09,089 --> 00:10:11,296 [ Wind whistling ] 246 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,055 God damn it. 247 00:10:13,158 --> 00:10:14,986 [ Hawk cries ] 248 00:10:15,089 --> 00:10:16,365 All right. 249 00:10:16,469 --> 00:10:19,089 [ Cellphone ringing ] 250 00:10:19,193 --> 00:10:20,262 Oh! 251 00:10:20,365 --> 00:10:22,503 [ Thud ]Aah! 252 00:10:22,607 --> 00:10:25,814 [ Groaning ] 253 00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:28,365 Hello?Kate: Hey, Matt! You still soaking it all in? 254 00:10:28,469 --> 00:10:29,676 John: You soaked? 255 00:10:29,779 --> 00:10:31,676 I was on the -- I was doing the hike. 256 00:10:31,779 --> 00:10:34,193 I slipped. I think I fractured my ankle. 257 00:10:34,296 --> 00:10:35,469 Ooh, ouchie wouchie! 258 00:10:35,572 --> 00:10:37,365 Same thing happened to me, bud. 259 00:10:37,469 --> 00:10:40,055 Listen, you've gotta go to the hospital. 260 00:10:40,158 --> 00:10:41,193 It's incredible! 261 00:10:41,296 --> 00:10:43,331 You don't even feel like you're in a hospital. 262 00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:46,021 Honestly, my doctor didn't even seem like a doctor. 263 00:10:46,124 --> 00:10:48,365 [ Keyboards clacking ] 264 00:10:48,469 --> 00:10:49,848 [ Sighs ] 265 00:10:49,952 --> 00:10:52,089 Hey, Rick, you wanna hear a joke? 266 00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:54,779 Stop me if you've heard this one before. 267 00:10:54,883 --> 00:10:58,055 What's the difference between Kate and John 268 00:10:58,158 --> 00:10:59,952 and a pair of shoes? 269 00:11:01,503 --> 00:11:04,296 Shoes have soles. 270 00:11:06,814 --> 00:11:08,296 All right, Rick. 271 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,779 I'm gonna go to the cafeteria. Do you wanna grab a bite? 272 00:11:17,158 --> 00:11:18,607 [ Slurping ] 273 00:11:18,710 --> 00:11:20,227 Okay, Rick. 274 00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:22,848 [ Telephone rings ] 275 00:11:24,641 --> 00:11:27,572 [ Sighs ] 276 00:11:27,676 --> 00:11:30,021 [ Birds chirping ] 277 00:11:30,124 --> 00:11:33,021 [ Sighs ] 278 00:11:33,124 --> 00:11:37,986 ♪♪ 279 00:11:39,158 --> 00:11:40,779 God damn it! 280 00:11:40,883 --> 00:11:43,607 [ Coughs ] Am I gonna die? 281 00:11:43,710 --> 00:11:45,365 No, you're never gonna die. 282 00:11:45,469 --> 00:11:47,400 But everybody dies. 283 00:11:47,503 --> 00:11:49,572 Orchid, you're not helping! 284 00:11:49,676 --> 00:11:50,883 Uh...Grace? 285 00:11:50,986 --> 00:11:52,848 Do you wanna get lunch? 286 00:11:52,952 --> 00:11:54,952 What, and leave my family to die?! 287 00:11:55,055 --> 00:11:57,538 I thought you said we weren'tgoing to die. 288 00:11:57,641 --> 00:11:58,952 Orchid! 289 00:11:59,055 --> 00:12:02,296 [ Chatter ] 290 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:06,986 [ Coughing ] 291 00:12:08,296 --> 00:12:10,469 Matt: God damn it. 292 00:12:10,572 --> 00:12:13,193 Stairs, of course. 293 00:12:13,296 --> 00:12:16,262 [ Grunts ] 294 00:12:16,365 --> 00:12:22,021 ♪♪ 295 00:12:25,779 --> 00:12:30,262 "Your life will be changed." 296 00:12:31,469 --> 00:12:32,641 Hey! 297 00:12:32,745 --> 00:12:34,469 Hey, give me that back! That's mine! 298 00:12:34,572 --> 00:12:36,503 Hey! What the fuck! 299 00:12:36,607 --> 00:12:38,814 Fuck! What the fuck? 300 00:12:38,917 --> 00:12:41,055 [ Woman laughing ] Oh! 301 00:12:41,158 --> 00:12:42,400 Something funny? 302 00:12:42,503 --> 00:12:44,710 [ Australian accent ] Yeah. 303 00:12:44,814 --> 00:12:47,986 You just got your purse stolen by a gymnastics prodigy. 304 00:12:48,089 --> 00:12:50,434 Well, I'm glad this is all entertaining to someone. 305 00:12:50,538 --> 00:12:51,676 It's very entertaining. 306 00:12:51,779 --> 00:12:53,365 What else have you got? 307 00:12:53,469 --> 00:12:56,193 Well, it's too bad there's not a banana peel for me to slip on. 308 00:12:56,296 --> 00:12:57,400 Ow! 309 00:12:57,503 --> 00:12:58,986 [ Laughs ] Shit. 310 00:12:59,089 --> 00:13:00,089 [ Groans ] 311 00:13:00,193 --> 00:13:02,883 Well, that concludes tonight's performance. 312 00:13:02,986 --> 00:13:06,158 I'm just gonna go back to my hotel. [ Laughs ] 313 00:13:07,193 --> 00:13:08,538 I'm Olivia. 314 00:13:08,641 --> 00:13:10,952 Let me give you a ride. 315 00:13:11,055 --> 00:13:13,296 Okay, here's another hypothetical -- 316 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,676 Let's say that I hit someone with my car right now. 317 00:13:16,779 --> 00:13:18,676 And it's sort of their fault, 318 00:13:18,779 --> 00:13:20,503 but it's sort of my fault, too. 319 00:13:20,607 --> 00:13:23,779 Okay? Would you report me to the authorities... 320 00:13:23,883 --> 00:13:26,917 or would you be cool and help me dispose of the body? 321 00:13:27,021 --> 00:13:28,745 Hmm. Let me just add 322 00:13:28,848 --> 00:13:31,262 that I would buy us gelato afterwards. 323 00:13:31,365 --> 00:13:32,572 Okay. 324 00:13:32,676 --> 00:13:34,331 Well, I'm in a foreign country, 325 00:13:34,434 --> 00:13:36,814 which means I do not know the number for the police. 326 00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,814 And even if I did, 327 00:13:38,917 --> 00:13:40,227 you would probably put the blame on me. 328 00:13:40,331 --> 00:13:42,089 Naturally. Yeah. 329 00:13:42,193 --> 00:13:43,710 I do not have the time in my schedule 330 00:13:43,814 --> 00:13:45,089 to be a political prisoner right now. 331 00:13:45,193 --> 00:13:46,538 I mean, that is off the table. 332 00:13:46,641 --> 00:13:48,021 [ Laughs ] So, I mean, yeah, 333 00:13:48,124 --> 00:13:50,676 if you're throwing in free gelato, give me a shovel. 334 00:13:50,779 --> 00:13:52,641 I'll bury that fucking corpse. 335 00:13:52,745 --> 00:13:53,883 [ Both laugh ] 336 00:13:53,986 --> 00:13:56,745 Well, here is your hotel. 337 00:13:56,848 --> 00:13:59,021 And I guess I didn't kill anyone, 338 00:13:59,124 --> 00:14:00,779 so this night is over. 339 00:14:00,883 --> 00:14:02,917 Yeah, it's a shame nobody died. 340 00:14:03,021 --> 00:14:06,779 Hmm. Well, thanks for the ride. 341 00:14:06,883 --> 00:14:08,331 Unless... 342 00:14:08,434 --> 00:14:11,124 I do know a great place to bury a body. 343 00:14:11,227 --> 00:14:13,262 [ Laughs ] Do you wanna see? 344 00:14:13,365 --> 00:14:17,227 It is next to an amazing little gelato shoppe. 345 00:14:17,331 --> 00:14:21,193 ♪♪ 346 00:14:26,814 --> 00:14:28,676 Oh, hey, Rick, that's actually my seat. 347 00:14:28,779 --> 00:14:32,572 You might remember that from 10 minutes ago. 348 00:14:32,676 --> 00:14:34,021 Rick? 349 00:14:34,124 --> 00:14:35,331 Ricky? 350 00:14:35,434 --> 00:14:36,434 Nothing. 351 00:14:36,538 --> 00:14:37,641 Okay. 352 00:14:37,745 --> 00:14:39,503 Well, here we go. 353 00:14:39,607 --> 00:14:42,021 C'mon, Rick buddy, upsy daisy. 354 00:14:42,124 --> 00:14:43,193 [ Shrieks ] 355 00:14:43,296 --> 00:14:47,227 Grace, I'd like to be buried in a closed casket 356 00:14:47,331 --> 00:14:49,848 at a traditional Catholic funeral. 357 00:14:49,952 --> 00:14:52,848 You returned to the Church? 358 00:14:52,952 --> 00:14:55,331 Sing us a song, Grace. 359 00:14:55,434 --> 00:14:57,952 Maybe a funeral dirge. 360 00:14:58,917 --> 00:15:03,400 [ To the tune of "Taps" ] ♪ Dying plants 361 00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:06,883 ♪ Dying plants 362 00:15:06,986 --> 00:15:08,883 ♪ I'm so sad 363 00:15:08,986 --> 00:15:11,400 ♪ I'm so sad 364 00:15:11,503 --> 00:15:15,538 ♪ Dying plants 365 00:15:15,641 --> 00:15:18,848 ♪ I love you 366 00:15:18,952 --> 00:15:22,400 ♪ Cows go moo 367 00:15:22,503 --> 00:15:27,469 ♪ Lucy Liu 368 00:15:27,572 --> 00:15:31,607 [ Grunts ] Okay. 369 00:15:31,710 --> 00:15:32,572 I got it. 370 00:15:32,676 --> 00:15:33,607 Wait, hold on. No! 371 00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:34,779 [ Laughs ] 372 00:15:34,883 --> 00:15:35,917 So, this is Kylie Minogue's estate, 373 00:15:36,021 --> 00:15:37,641 but she's never here. 374 00:15:37,745 --> 00:15:40,607 I know about it 'cause I'm Australian. 375 00:15:40,710 --> 00:15:44,503 Oh, you're Australian? Gross. 376 00:15:44,607 --> 00:15:45,848 Yeah, I'm actually looking into 377 00:15:45,952 --> 00:15:47,607 corrective surgery to become Canadian. 378 00:15:47,710 --> 00:15:49,331 [ Laughs ] 379 00:15:49,434 --> 00:15:51,055 You know, I was really 380 00:15:51,158 --> 00:15:53,710 regretting my vacation up until just now. 381 00:15:53,814 --> 00:15:55,365 Why would you regret a holiday? 382 00:15:55,469 --> 00:15:57,917 Because everyone said this place was amazing, 383 00:15:58,021 --> 00:15:59,641 and then it just wasn't. 384 00:15:59,745 --> 00:16:01,296 Oh, shut up. [ Laughs ] 385 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:04,262 At least you escaped your boring life and did something. 386 00:16:04,365 --> 00:16:06,641 You know, doing stuff is always better 387 00:16:06,745 --> 00:16:08,158 than not doing stuff. 388 00:16:08,262 --> 00:16:09,779 [ Laughs ] 389 00:16:09,883 --> 00:16:11,021 There. 390 00:16:11,124 --> 00:16:13,503 That is where I would bury the body. 391 00:16:13,607 --> 00:16:14,745 A swimming pool? 392 00:16:14,848 --> 00:16:16,676 That's a terrible place to bury a -- 393 00:16:16,779 --> 00:16:19,262 No! [ Laughs ] 394 00:16:19,365 --> 00:16:20,572 Hoo! 395 00:16:20,676 --> 00:16:22,814 [ Slurping ] 396 00:16:22,917 --> 00:16:24,710 [ Sighs ] 397 00:16:24,814 --> 00:16:29,469 [ Slurping continues ] 398 00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:30,607 Rick, stop it! 399 00:16:30,710 --> 00:16:33,296 It's empty! 400 00:16:34,469 --> 00:16:35,745 [ Slurping continues ] 401 00:16:35,848 --> 00:16:38,469 Rick, I know I don't even need to ask, 402 00:16:38,572 --> 00:16:39,779 but do you have -- yep. 403 00:16:39,883 --> 00:16:41,538 Ahead of schedule, as usual. 404 00:16:41,641 --> 00:16:42,986 Whoo, whoo, whoo. 405 00:16:43,089 --> 00:16:46,365 Also, Jake, we received a super anonymous tip 406 00:16:46,469 --> 00:16:49,641 that you apparently think we're shoes, 407 00:16:49,745 --> 00:16:51,503 and also have no souls. 408 00:16:51,607 --> 00:16:54,227 And I guess what we're sort of wondering is, 409 00:16:54,331 --> 00:16:55,641 what the fuck? 410 00:16:55,745 --> 00:16:57,814 Jake... 411 00:16:57,917 --> 00:17:01,055 I have a soul, and I'm going to heaven. 412 00:17:01,158 --> 00:17:03,227 Maybe you should take a little tip from Rick 413 00:17:03,331 --> 00:17:05,365 and spend less time disparaging your mentors 414 00:17:05,469 --> 00:17:09,055 and a little more time click-clacking on that keyboard. 415 00:17:09,158 --> 00:17:10,952 [ Clicking tongue ] 416 00:17:11,055 --> 00:17:13,676 [ Clicking tongue ] 417 00:17:13,779 --> 00:17:15,607 Ding! 418 00:17:15,710 --> 00:17:16,745 Hey, Rick? 419 00:17:16,848 --> 00:17:17,952 I don't know if anyone has told you, 420 00:17:18,055 --> 00:17:19,641 but I'm a petty, vengeful bitch 421 00:17:19,745 --> 00:17:21,089 and I know that about myself. 422 00:17:21,193 --> 00:17:22,538 I went to therapy, 423 00:17:22,641 --> 00:17:24,952 accepted it wholly, and made it my brand. 424 00:17:25,055 --> 00:17:26,745 I'm currently in the process 425 00:17:26,848 --> 00:17:28,227 of ruining dozens of people's lives, 426 00:17:28,331 --> 00:17:30,262 and you just hopped to the top of the list, buddy. 427 00:17:30,365 --> 00:17:31,883 What do you think about that, Rick? 428 00:17:31,986 --> 00:17:33,400 Huh, Rick? 429 00:17:33,503 --> 00:17:34,779 Rick?! 430 00:17:34,883 --> 00:17:39,055 ♪♪ 431 00:17:39,158 --> 00:17:43,296 [ High-pitched whimper ] 432 00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:44,434 Ricky? 433 00:17:44,538 --> 00:17:49,193 [ Police radio chatter ] 434 00:17:50,331 --> 00:17:51,676 John: What do you think happened? 435 00:17:51,779 --> 00:17:52,917 Was it the black mold? 436 00:17:53,021 --> 00:17:54,158 Do you want to bankrupt this company? 437 00:17:54,262 --> 00:17:56,158 Never speak of the black mold. 438 00:17:56,262 --> 00:17:57,572 What black mold, am I right? John, you just said it. 439 00:17:57,676 --> 00:18:00,469 No, I'm saying I'm not saying "black mold." 440 00:18:00,572 --> 00:18:02,262 [ Telephone ringing, high-pitched whining ] 441 00:18:02,365 --> 00:18:04,469 Grace: People weren't meant to be in offices. 442 00:18:04,572 --> 00:18:06,365 We were made to live in the forest. 443 00:18:06,469 --> 00:18:09,641 You're going to die in the office, just like Rick. 444 00:18:09,745 --> 00:18:11,158 Grace? 445 00:18:11,262 --> 00:18:12,986 Killed them all, of course. 446 00:18:13,089 --> 00:18:14,365 Grace, you were right. 447 00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:17,193 We don't belong here. Let's go. 448 00:18:17,296 --> 00:18:18,538 ♪♪ 449 00:18:18,641 --> 00:18:21,572 [ Birds chirping ] 450 00:18:21,676 --> 00:18:23,917 [ Hawk cries ] 451 00:18:24,021 --> 00:18:33,917 ♪♪ 452 00:18:34,021 --> 00:18:37,434 ♪♪ 453 00:18:37,538 --> 00:18:38,779 [ Insect buzzing ] 454 00:18:38,883 --> 00:18:41,745 God, there are a lot of bugs here. 455 00:18:43,055 --> 00:18:44,814 Okay, I was wrong! 456 00:18:44,917 --> 00:18:46,434 The forest sucks. 457 00:18:46,538 --> 00:18:48,296 Let's go. 458 00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:50,331 [ Sighs ] 459 00:18:50,434 --> 00:18:51,538 By the way, 460 00:18:51,641 --> 00:18:53,193 did I tell you that Rick straight-up porked out? 461 00:18:54,986 --> 00:18:57,676 Well, I can honestly say that's the best sex I've ever had... 462 00:18:57,779 --> 00:18:59,814 in Kylie Minogue's secret garden. 463 00:18:59,917 --> 00:19:03,089 For me...top 20? 464 00:19:03,193 --> 00:19:05,572 [ Laughs ] Hey, Olivia... 465 00:19:05,676 --> 00:19:08,503 thanks for making my vacation worth it. 466 00:19:08,607 --> 00:19:10,607 Oh, shut up. 467 00:19:10,710 --> 00:19:13,572 ♪♪ 468 00:19:13,676 --> 00:19:16,089 [ Engine starts ] 469 00:19:16,952 --> 00:19:19,883 [ Cellphone ringing ] 470 00:19:19,986 --> 00:19:21,883 Hello? 471 00:19:21,986 --> 00:19:23,710 John: Hey, buddy! 472 00:19:23,814 --> 00:19:25,021 How's the vacation going? 473 00:19:25,124 --> 00:19:27,296 Have you hit that gelato shoppe yet? 474 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,400 Whoo! Gelato! 475 00:19:29,503 --> 00:19:30,641 Yeah, I did. 476 00:19:30,745 --> 00:19:33,158 But I also just met the most amazing woman. 477 00:19:33,262 --> 00:19:35,986 Oh, you met Olivia! 478 00:19:36,814 --> 00:19:38,296 How do you know Olivia? 479 00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:41,158 We all had sex with her in Kylie Minogue's secret garden. 480 00:19:41,262 --> 00:19:42,952 Wasn't it so spontaneous? 481 00:19:43,055 --> 00:19:45,089 So romantic. Best night of my life. 482 00:19:45,193 --> 00:19:48,331 For me...top 20? 483 00:19:48,434 --> 00:19:50,158 Oh, oh, Matt! Matt, here's a joke. 484 00:19:50,262 --> 00:19:53,641 How do you say "gelato" in Italian? 485 00:19:53,745 --> 00:19:56,710 [ Italian accent ] Ice cream! 486 00:19:56,814 --> 00:19:58,607 [ Laughter ] 487 00:19:58,710 --> 00:20:00,055 I go, "Ice cream!" 488 00:20:00,158 --> 00:20:01,848 [ Normal voice ] Everyone's dying. 489 00:20:01,952 --> 00:20:03,262 ♪♪ 490 00:20:03,365 --> 00:20:05,400 Then, my flight got delayed, 491 00:20:05,503 --> 00:20:07,676 so it took me 30 hours to get home. 492 00:20:07,779 --> 00:20:08,848 And I didn't have time to shower, 493 00:20:08,952 --> 00:20:10,055 so I just had to throw on this suit 494 00:20:10,158 --> 00:20:11,607 and come straight into work. 495 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:13,021 Anyway, how was your week? 496 00:20:13,124 --> 00:20:14,814 It was great. I'm bummed your back. 497 00:20:14,917 --> 00:20:16,055 You missed me. 498 00:20:16,158 --> 00:20:17,883 Say you missed me. Say it! 499 00:20:17,986 --> 00:20:19,124 Never. 500 00:20:19,227 --> 00:20:21,676 Matt! Back from paradise! 501 00:20:21,779 --> 00:20:24,365 So... how was it? 502 00:20:24,469 --> 00:20:25,710 [ Laughs ] 503 00:20:25,814 --> 00:20:28,227 [ Scoffs ] It was... 504 00:20:28,331 --> 00:20:31,193 ♪♪ 505 00:20:31,296 --> 00:20:32,607 ...uh... 506 00:20:32,710 --> 00:20:36,538 ♪♪ 507 00:20:36,641 --> 00:20:38,917 ...amazing. Yes. 508 00:20:39,021 --> 00:20:40,365 [ Laughs ] 509 00:20:40,469 --> 00:20:41,469 We knew it! 510 00:20:41,572 --> 00:20:43,986 And you are welcome for making you go. 511 00:20:44,089 --> 00:20:45,641 We're glad to have you back 512 00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,676 so you can pick up the ball you dropped last week. 513 00:20:47,779 --> 00:20:50,296 And, Jake, we know you're worried sick about Rick. 514 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:51,917 But you'll be happy to know 515 00:20:52,021 --> 00:20:53,814 he's getting some much-needed R&R. 516 00:20:53,917 --> 00:20:55,227 Mm-hmm. 517 00:20:55,331 --> 00:21:01,503 ♪♪ 518 00:21:01,607 --> 00:21:05,745 [ Coughing ] 519 00:21:10,331 --> 00:21:11,779 [ Slump! ] 520 00:21:11,883 --> 00:21:13,641 [ Ragtime music playing ] 521 00:21:13,745 --> 00:21:15,055 [ Slump! ] 522 00:21:15,158 --> 00:21:17,021 [ Boing! ][ Smack! ] 523 00:21:17,124 --> 00:21:19,400 [ Sproing! Zip! ] 524 00:21:19,503 --> 00:21:21,331 [ Zing! Thud! ] 525 00:21:21,434 --> 00:21:22,538 [ Slump! ] 526 00:21:22,641 --> 00:21:24,296 [ Splash! Thud! ] 35195

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