All language subtitles for 800.Words.S02E01.Episode.1.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-KiNGS-eng

[ Crowded House´s
"Better Be Home Soon" plays ]

♫ Somewhere deep inside ♫

♫ Something´s
got a hold on you ♫

♫ And it´s pushing me aside ♫

♫ See it stretch on forever ♫

♫ And I know I´m right ♫

♫ For the first time
in my life ♫

GEORGE:
I´m glad I came over.

Thanks for bringing my stuff.

Well, you left in such a hurry,
it´s the least I can do.

Anything else you want
sent over, just sing out.

I´m fine.

Grandma Trish has been more
than happy to buy me things.

Yeah, I bet.

Do you miss Sydney?

Yeah, of course.

That´s why it´ll be good
to come and visit.

Yeah.

I´m not sure when
the next time will be, though.

Things are pretty full-on
at the moment.

In Weld?

Yeah, believe it or not.

With Jan.

Yeah, with Jan.

-Your mother loved this school.
-I know.

I sit in assembly looking at
her name on the honors board.

Yeah.
It did love her back.

I´m not her, Dad.

I know.

Oh, Arlo texted,

and the Internet´s
up and running again.

Have you seriously
got fiber now?

Yeah, yeah, Zac and Ike
have been pretty much

living at our place,
getting it up and running.

Ike asked after you.
A few times.

-I hope you told him I´m fine.
-I did.

´Cause I am.

Yeah, I know.
I can see that.

Well, I better get going.

[ School bell rings ]

Just as long as you´re happy,
okay?

Thank you.

-Go.
-[ Chuckles ]

GEORGE:
I can´t do this anymore.

But...
But did you stick to the plan?

Yeah, I´m pretty sure I did.

Pretty sure?
Is that a yes or a no?

Yes.
Yeah, it´s a yes.

But with every breath,
all I wanted to do was say,

"Please come home.
We love you and we miss you."

And we agreed that
that would never, ever work

because Shay is a stubborn cow.

Your words, not mine.

What did we agree on, Dad?

That Shay needs to want to
come home of her own accord.

I-I know.

Exactly. Exactly.

Did you tell her
about the Internet?

GEORGE: Yes, I told her
about the Internet.

ARLO: Okay, good.
Good.

Then your job is done, and I can
finally break radio silence.

Are we doing
the right thing here?

Well, that very much depends
on Shay, doesn´t it?

[ Up-tempo music plays ]

-Ho ho ho.
-Ohh!

Hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo!

Oh.

-Hey-oh!
-WOMAN: Aah! [ Laughs ]

[ Explosion echoes ]

-Cool.
-No, Billy, not cool.

Listen to what Constable Tom
has to say.

[ Clears throat ]

A timely reminder

of the destructive properties
of gunpowder.

If this letterbox
had been a human being,

what do you think the result
would have been?

Death.

Not necessarily instant.
Possibly slow and painful.

Yes, Siouxsie, thank you.

But only if the fireworks
had have been in the head.

TOM: Last year...

Or in your case, Monty,
over multiple years...

I´ve had to speak to
each and every one of you

about the gross misuse

of our legal right
to blow stuff up once a year.

I was only trying to put on
a bit of a show

for the customers.

You work in a petrol station,
Ollie.

Look, I´m sorry, but I feel like
I´m being singled out here.

Really, Monty?

The Wave of Mutilation?

The Drone of Carnage?

What have you got planned
this year?

Nothing.

[ Siren wails in distance ]

And that´s me.

Uh, excuse me.

Why did you blow up
our letterbox?

To remind certain lawbreakers
of the fragility of life.

Here endeth the lesson.

You may go.

-Um...
-Yes, young Billy?

When do the fireworks
go on sale?

Oh, as soon as I get there.

The hot new release this year

is the Dragon´s
Mother Cluster Shower.

Word is it really goes off.

-Awesome!
-Heh.

Dear God.

Hey, you know,
you could have warned us.

Did you not tell them?

Yeah.

No.
Ohh, been real busy lately.

Sorry, it slipped my mind.

Anyway, thanks for
the use of the, um...

I´ll build you another one.

♫ Now the sun is out,
it´s warming up between us ♫

♫ We´ve got to
keep the faith ♫

-G´day, George.
-Monty.

♫ So the love
can never leave us ♫

♫ Sweet lover,
well, you know what I like ♫

♫ Don´t stop it,
´cause it´s gonna be all right ♫

Be safe
and don´t tell your mother.

♫ We´re not friends
if you don´t have time ♫

♫ It´s like Johnny Cash
and the ties that bind ♫

♫ If you think
you´ll never walk the line ♫

♫ You´re dreaming ♫

[ Pigs squealing ]

♫ You´re dreaming ´bout living
in a tree-lined street ♫

♫ Kicking up leaves with
the same two feet as before ♫

♫ You don´t want to be
lonely anymore ♫

♫ Now the sun is out,
it´s warming up between us ♫

-Whoa!
-[ Tires screech ]

Damn!

[ Groans ]

[ Parking brake ratchets ]

[ Engine stops ]

God, I am so sorry.

It rolled off
the back of the trailer.

I feel like
we´ve been here before.

-What?
-Well...

[ Laughing ] Oh, right.
Yeah!

Except this one´s
only papier-mâché.

Oh.

-For the Guy.
-Right.

How did your trip go?

Okay, I think.

You didn´t drag her back
kicking and screaming?

No, that wasn´t the plan.

So you have a plan?

In a manner of speaking.

Which Guy is this for?

The one
that goes on the bonfire.

You and Jan are coming.

-Oh, are we?
-Yeah, of course.

Could you give me a hand

to get this back on the trailer?

Yeah.
Yeah, sure.

-Up. There we go.
-[ Laughs ]

[ Cellphone rings ]

And he´s back.

Hey, ugly blister.

And suddenly I miss
not being able to contact you.

Yeah, I mean, the Wi-Fi here
is really fast now.

Glad something in Weld is.

Where are you?
Are you at school?

That doesn´t look like school.

I didn´t
really feel like school today.

Where are you?

ARLO:
Oh, I´m at home, in your room.

Well, we call it
the spare room now.

But, hey, check this out.

Woody kind of went nuts.

Whole new wardrobe thingy,

new wallpaper,
curtains and stuff.

Yeah, and...

[ Clicks ]

the door even shuts.

Arlo, I´m not coming back just
because you´ve done up my room.

Well, it´s not your room.
It´s the spare room.

And, hey, uh, check this out.

Dad was over
the state of the shower

and got Bill McNamara in
to fix it.

And they stripped out the whole
thing and started again.

I mean, it´s not as good
as where you are,

but by Weld standards
it´s pretty awesome.

Dad seems happy.

He´s not.

Not as happy as he should be.

I have to go.
I´ve got exams.

-Good luck with those.
-Ta.

And good luck

with whatever it is
you´re doing over there.

-Stuff.
-Yeah.

Good luck with stuff.

[ Tone beeps ]

GEORGE: There are two types
of combustion...

Explosion and implosion.

Both, however,
lead to the same end result.

Radical change
in a very short space of time.

Did you not know this
about Kiwis?

Yeah, they take Guy Fawkes
to whole new levels.

From the sound of it, they´ll
blow pretty much anything up.

Including our letterbox,
apparently.

Ah, thank you.

Yeah, I vaguely remember that
from when I was a kid.

-This cannot end well.
-[ Chuckles ]

Hey.

Hey.
How was Sydney?

It felt very brief.

-Shay´s okay?
-She´s...

She´s fine.

Good. And it´s good
you got to talk to her.

Yeah, it is.

-Missed you.
-You too.

And how about you, what did you
get up to while I was away?

Oh, I, um...
I made lots of new friends.

Really?

Yeah,
learned all sorts of things.

Hello.

Oh. Hi. Uh...

This is the famous nudey beach.

Sure is.
You´re welcome to join.

No, it´s fine.
Thanks.

You have a nice day.

You used to be
Laura´s best friend, eh?

FIONA: Hannah!

You don´t just blurt out
a question like that.

What? I´m just getting to know
our newest resident.

Is that what I am?

Well, I don´t know.
Are you?

George is in Sydney, right?

Yeah, he´s taking some of
Shay´s stuff over to her.

She did leave in rather a hurry.

She did.

And then you arrived.

I did.

Yep, I´m practically
a local now.

Great.
Welcome to Weld.

Thank you.

[ Sighs ] Whew, sorry.

The flying and that little
time difference always hits you

more than you think it will.

You should have a lie-down.

Yeah, I think I will.

It´s good to have you home,
though.

Yeah, it´s...
It´s good to be home.

GEORGE: Guy Fawkes,
the man whose memory

these insane Kiwis
celebrate every year

by burning him in effigy,

was a radical seeking change

by blowing the living daylights
out of the world as he knew it.

For most of us, however,
change comes much slower.

Creeping up on us
without us realizing

the process
is actually happening.

[ Fireworks whistling,
exploding ]

Sure, sounds great.

Why would you set off fireworks
in the daytime?

You can´t see
all the pretty sparkly bits.

Maybe they just like the sound.

-Then go live in a war zone.
-[ Laughs ]

Okay.
I´ll see you then.

That was Big Mac.

He wants me
to have lunch with him.

-Really? What for?
-I have no idea.

But he assures me he´s paying.
An actual free lunch.

Hmm.

That was some mighty fine
sleeping there, George Turner.

I must have been more tired
than I thought.

Well, you must be
pretty emotionally drained.

Yeah.
Something like that.

Dad, you remember we have

parent-teacher interviews today,
right?

I´ll grab a shower,
and I´m all over it.

Should I come?

No.

Um, i-it´s more
a parent-teacher thing.

Of course.

I´m sorry about that.

You have lunch.

Free lunches are a rare beast
these days, eh?

So you´re saying
he´s already passed this NAEC...

-NCEA, Dad.
-Oh...

National Certificate
of Educational Achievement.

And yes!

Oh, even before the exams?

Yes! But no.

Yeah, if I don´t sit the exams,
I´ll fail.

What if you fail the exam?

I´ll still pass.

It´s peculiar to New Zealand.

Like this thing they have
for Guy Fawkes.

Oh, my God!
Don´t you just love Guy Fawkes?

I mean, I admit the first year
I was terrified.

It´s like the world
was exploding around me.

Especially because
that was the year

that Monty unveiled
the Crown of Fire.

Ow, ow, ow!
Bad idea!

Bad idea!

Dad, I can´t put you out
if you keep running away.

MONTY: Oh, God!

Sorry. Arlo, this is
about your studies.

We´re expecting
Excellence endorsements,

which is unheard of

for Weld District High School,
to be honest.

-That´s great.
-Great.

And what about Shay?
How is she?

Pretty miserable, actually.

Which is a good thing.

She... She has to hit rock
bottom for things to pan out.

Pan out?

Yeah, what Arlo means is that
Shay has made a big decision

and she has to own it.

I guess.

LINDSAY: You can´t tell me
what to do!

BILL JR.: Of course I can.
I´m your bloody father.

But you don´t get it!

You´re failing everything,
Lindsay.

-What´s not to get?
-I tried, but it´s hard.

BILL JR.:
Oh, don´t give me that.

The only thing
you try hard at is partying.

-Come on.
-You know what you need?

You need a boot up your a...

-Bill.
-George.

That´s what you need.
I´ve had it up to here, Lindsay.

Next year, girl,
you´re going to boarding school,

just like your brother.

That was a great report, Arlo.

Clearly you´ve got
your mother´s brains.

[ Chuckles ]

Uh, Dad, I just realized

I´ve got stuff I need to do
in the library.

I´ll, um...

You go.
I´ll walk home later.

It´s okay.
I don´t mind waiting.

No, no, honestly.
I-I´ll see you at home.

I think what your dad was saying
was really uncool.

So?
It´s nothing new.

So perhaps I could help.

How?

I could help you study.

Maybe if you pass,
he´ll change his mind.

He´s a bully.
It won´t make any difference.

It might.

You come from a nice family.

Don´t even pretend
to understand.

Most people drink alone
under the cover of darkness.

-I´m meeting someone.
-Ah.

Big Mac, for lunch.

Should I be worried?

Did he say why the lunch?

JAN: No.

Maybe he thinks you´re single

and he wants to put
his love moves on you.

Ew!

Why would he think I´m single?

Maybe word hasn´t reached him
you´re with George.

Am I with George?

Well, aren´t you?

Ladies.

Jan.
How lovely to see you.

It is not Big Mac.

Right.
It just looks like Big Mac.

WOODY: [ Laughs ]

It´s all go here.

Oh, mate, us Weldians
fully embrace the big GFN.

-GFN?
-Yeah, Guy Fawkes Night.

Oh.

A night that´s like catnip
to the people of Weld.

Magic, explosions.

-Primal.
-Primal.

-If you say so, Zac.
-Ignore him, George.

All my kids
arrived into the world

nine months after the GFN.

-Isn´t that right, Katie?
-Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Go away.

52% of all birthdays in Weld

occur nine months
after Guy Fawkes.

That is not true.

It is. I did
a statistics project on it.

The fireworks go off, the people
go off, and babies get made.

KATIE: Well, to be fair,

Billy was conceived in
those sand dunes over there.

Probably too much information.

Yeah, maybe.

Look, all I´m saying is
you should watch out.

Because with the power
of Guy Fawkes tomorrow night,

Arlo might end up with a little
brother in nine months´ time.

-[ Laughs ]
-Thanks for the warning, Billy.

That´s Big Mac, isn´t it?

What?! No!

It´s just a Guy.

Yeah, right.

I want details.
Is Shay okay?

Yeah, she´s fine.

Actually, she´s not fine.

Oh, I´m sorry to hear that.

WOODY:
No, no, no, that´s good!

That´s good
´cause that goes in with how

Arlo and George are making out
life´s totally fine without her.

Operation Shay,
we´re calling it.

Woody,
remember that conversation

that you, me, and Arlo had
about keeping Operation Shay

strictly between us?

I do now, yeah.

And if I´m done here, um,
I need to fix a letterbox.

-Yeah.
-Quite urgent.

Sorry.

Are you sure reverse psychology
is the wisest option?

I´m not sure of anything,
to be honest.

And I´m aware of
the hundred different ways

this could backfire.

But I miss my daughter
every minute of every day,

and I´ve got to do something
to get her back.

Can you blame me?

Of course not.

I´ll see you later.

[ Computer rings ]

Hi.
Is that George?

Yeah.
Hello, person who´s not Noah.

Hi. No. I am Taylor-Rose,
your assistant editor.

Oh.
What happened to Noah?

-You so don´t want to know.
-Try me.

Let´s just say
an unfortunate incident

involving social media.

There are photos that you really
shouldn´t ever take,

let alone post.

-Go, Noah.
-But you have me now.

I do. And what can I do for you,
Taylor-Rose?

First thing I want to say is how
much I have admired your column.

Is that so?

You have done, like,
an amazing job for so long now.

Your use of the past tense

suggests that you´re softening
me up for some bad news.

There´s no such thing
as bad news, George.

Oh, yes, there is.

Bad news can be the same
as a new beginning.

And the good news is,

you actually get to decide
when your final column is.

My final column?

Either this week or next week´s.

Probably not gonna be possible
after that,

but at least you get some choice

with what fits
with your creative flow.

Is it possible
to speak with my actual editor?

If you can find her, totes.

Apparently
she´s on special leave.

Disappeared over a month ago.
No one can get hold of her.

Are you referring to Jan?

Jan, Jane, June.

Some old-fashioned name
like that.

No, no, it´s Jan.

Is she still editor?

Unclear.

Noah reckoned there was
some kind of breakdown,

a thing
with one of the bosses...

Maybe an affair.

And meanwhile I´m being fired?

Don´t think of it like that.

But how else am I supposed to
think of it?

I´m a really big fan of
the conscious uncoupling thing.

Well, I´ll get back to you
about my final column.

JAN: Hello?

How was the free lunch?

Not entirely free.
There was a catch.

He offered me a job,
editing News of the Weld.

Hell, maybe I´ll buy
the Stafford Star.

Then you can edit them both.

I mean, you are clearly
the best man for the job.

[ Laughs ]

Wow.

That´s me, George...
Best man for the job.

Intriguing.

Meanwhile, I was having
an interesting conversation

with Taylor-Rose.

Who is Taylor-Rose,

and should I be jealous of her
and her double-barreled name?

Maybe, ´cause she was sitting
in your chair when she called.

She´s from the magazine?

While you were being wined
and dined and offered a job,

I was losing mine.

Those bastards.

You do realize that you´re still
editor of said bastards, right?

Really?

I was under the impression that
you´d left your Sydney position.

I did. I think they´re just
scared of legal action.

Why?

From the affair.

What affair?

The one I was having
with my boss.

GEORGE: Oh.

And, uh...

how long were you having
this affair with your boss?

Years.

Until he ended it because
his heinous wife is pregnant.

-Is that why you came here?
-Yeah.

But why didn´t you tell me?

You had your own problems.

Yeah, but if we´re gonna,
you know, we need to be able to

talk to each other
about stuff like that.

Really, George?

Then why didn´t you tell me
about Operation Shay?

How do you know about
Operation...?

Woody.

Well, you did leave me
alone in the house with him.

I mean, what, were you...

Were you worried
that I was gonna say

that toying with
a teenage girl´s emotions

is a very dangerous thing to do?

We decided, Arlo and I, that
we would keep it in the family.

And Woody, of course, because
he needed to do the work.

All of which begs
the question...

Am I a part of this family
or not?

Man, there is enough gunpowder
in this town

to blow us back to Sydney.

Damn, I, uh...

I left my credit card
at the Boat Club.

I might go for a surf.

Wait, is there a problem here?

All good, mate.

GEORGE: Have you...

Have you ever found yourself
in a relationship

that hasn´t begun?

What, like you think it´s gonna
begin, and then it never does?

No, as in
you skipped the beginning

and went straight to the middle.

Nope.

I mean, I have my trouble
beginning relationships.

If they start at all,
it´s a bloody miracle.

Yeah, but if they did,

could you end something
that hasn´t begun?

But what we´re talking about

has most definitely begun,
right?

Y-Yes.

You are now in a relationship
with a man in Weld,

who is not the man you were
having an affair with

in Sydney last month?

Yeah, sort of.

Nice work.

What do you mean, "sort of"?

I mean, it´s not
what I came here to do.

But it´s what happened
when you came here.

Yes.

Yes, it is.

Whatever "it" is.

Wh... You don´t know what it is?

No.
I have no idea.

Is there magic?

I think we skipped the magic bit

and went straight to the "Hi,
honey, how was your day?" bit.

So you´re not in love with Jan?

Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
As a friend, she´s...

Great. I mean,
that´s the best kind of love.

It´s not ideal, is it?

Men are not mind readers, Jan.

They need you to tell them
what they want.

HANNAH:
And what you want.

You know, "Down a bit,
to the side, slow it down."

There are bigger issues here
than sex, Hannah.

Are there?
Jan?

-The sex is lovely.
-Wow.

That is one of
the most depressing things

I´ve ever heard.

FIONA: Just ignore her.

It´s not
how these things start...

It´s how they finish
that´s important.

And you shouldn´t feel afraid of
pressing George for an answer.

What´s the question?

Does he love you?

So is there anything wrong
with just letting it happen?

Well, that´s what
I´ve been doing thus far

and how I find myself
in this curious situation.

And it´s not working for you,
is it?

No.

Hey, peasants.
How´s it going?

I´m studying for exams
I´ve already passed.

I love New Zealand.

What´s happening with you?

Uh, not much.

Living the dream, eh?

SHAY:
Dad make it home okay?

Yeah. just in time
for their first fight.

Him and Jan?
What were they fighting about?

No idea. I just walked in
on the icy aftermath.

What does
it matter to you anyway?

It´s Dad.
Of course it matters to me.

Yeah, from a distance.

-IKE: Hey, Arlo.
-Oh, dear.

What?

Hey, sorry to bust in, bro,
but, uh, I need your help.

Hey, Shay!

Okay. Yep, still not
her favorite person, eh?

-Yeah, no.
-[ Exhales sharply ]

So, what are you doing
in my room?

Like I said, I need your help.

IKE:
Okay, you can let go now.

Yeah.

Your sister never held on
that tight.

Well, it may seem old-fashioned,
but I value life.

-What´s this about?
-All will be revealed.

I thought you were
getting something useful,

like alcohol to ease my pain.

-Lindsay...
-[ Door locks ]

Oh, man, she´s...
She´s run away from home.

Right.
And moved in with you?

In that she´s occupying
my caravan, yes.

Okay, and why is this
my problem?

Well, she said something about
you saying

that she should
stand up to her father.

Yeah, by... by studying.
Not by throwing herself at you.

-I don´t want her!
-LINDSAY: Um, I can hear you.

Yeah, great, then you get that
I´m not interested in you.

She´s in Sydney, Ike.

Yeah, and you´re in my room,
and I want you out.

Okay, uh, Lindsay,

I think it´s r-really cool

that you´re doing something
about your dad,

´cause he´s a real douche.

-LINDSAY: You got that right.
-Yeah, but this isn´t the way.

Exactly,
´cause when my dad gets back,

he´s gonna throw your ass out.

LINDSAY:
I´m not going home!

Hey, well, um, if you want,

you could come stay
at our place.

U-Until things get sorted out.

You´re just saying that
´cause you want to hit on me.

No.

No, I´m saying it
´cause I-I want to help.

And we have a spare room, so...

Okay.
That can work.

But I am not sleeping with you.

Oh, no.
No, not gonna happen.

That´s fine.
I get it.

GEORGE: There is an inevitably
that occurs

when certain elements mix.

The Chinese discovered this
and called it gunpowder.

By adding a spark, there´s no
way to avoid an explosion.

[ Cellphone rings ]

Hello.

You need to come down
to the Boat Club now.

Why?

So I don´t lose
my liquor license.

I am about to redefine
your sensory experience

of what a mojito means.

-[ Cheering ]
-Whoo-hoo!

[ Laughs ]

Well, anyway...

Tom.

Get in line for the best mojito
this side of Tassie.

-[ Cheering ]
-Get in line! Whoo!

This is about
fireworks etiquette, isn´t it?

Hopefully to
drive the point home.

It´s all good, Tom.

This is a full
and final warning, Monty.

There can be no repeat
of the Drone of Carnage.

This thing´s really hard to fly.

[ People screaming ]

Nah, you´re doing great, Dad.

Or the Wave of Mutilation.

That was meant to be
an oceanic extravaganza.

How were were to know
that a wave was gonna come along

and angle the board
and fireworks at the crowd,

and then propel it towards
the beach at a rate of knots?

Not entirely according to plan.

Nah, it´s great, Dad.

It´s a surf beach, Monty.

And waves do what waves do.

This year, nothing.

Do you hear me?

The crowds love it, Tom.

As they flee in terror.

Deep down, they love it.

And you.
You´re worse than him.

You enable him.

He has a gift.

Not this year he doesn´t.

The Janito!

-Whoo!
-[ Cheering ]

She´s a keeper, this one,
George.

Oh, my.
Déjà vu in reverse.

When I first laid eyes
on George,

he was the barman,

serving me
and my dear friend Laura.

Remember? Hmm?

And he was so handsome
and suave.

And, oh, she fell for him
so hard.

Yeah, thanks, Jan.
I remember that.

You´re here to take me home,
aren´t you?

-No!
-No, you´re not, are you?

Not without sampling
your finest Janito first.

JAN: Ohh!

Um, that may not be
entirely possible.

Me?
I see nothing.

You know, she´s a lot more fun
than I thought she´d be.

Yeah, she is.

She´s always been
like that... fun.

A fun friend.

BILL JR.: George Turner!

Bill Jr.

Can I help you?

Like you did for my daughter?

Excuse me?

It´s called kidnapping, mate!

I am not going with you!

-You don´t get to decide.
-I´m my own person.

You´re 16!

And I don´t want to
be living with someone

who´s always telling me
what to do!

I´m your father!
That´s my job!

You, get in the car,
you´re coming home.

No!

You wanted to send me away.
Well, now I´m away.

Hey, can I say something here?

I think you´ve said about
enough, luring my girl here.

No one lured anyone anywhere.

I just think
it might be a good idea

to let Lindsay stay here
for a while.

I can help her study.

Study?
How to get into her pants?

Tai ho, mate.
That´s not on.

Come on, Tom, I know
what teenage boys are like.

-Not my son.
-I just want to help.

Honestly.

And this is what you want,
is it?

Yes.

And you´re okay with this?

I think what´s done is done.

Fine.

She´s your problem, then.

Right, clearly not a kidnapping.

So I will leave you people
to it.

[ Engine starts,
vehicle departs ]

Cool!

We can go and get my clothes
tomorrow when he´s at work.

-W-We had a spare room.
-Yes, we did.

-ARLO: Hey.
-SHAY: Hey.

Uh, what´s up?

Just about to ask you
the same question.

What was Ike´s problem?

What does that matter to you?

-Just curious, that´s all.
-LINDSAY: Where are the towels?

I want to take a shower
when your dad´s girlfriend´s

finished hurling.

Hey, Shay!
How´s Sydney?

Uh, cupboard just
outside the bathroom.

Okay.

Why is that skank

in my house?

She´s kind of
living with us now.

With you?

No.
No, not like that.

Just with us.

In my room?

It´s not your room.
It´s the spare room.

I-I have to go.

[ Dial tone ]

Jan sure tied one on
last night, eh?

For which she is
paying the price.

[ Laughs ]

Hey, that hole in the ceiling
above my bed...

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
top of my priority list.

Straight after the letterbox.
Hey, did she chunder?

-Oh, yes.
-Hoo hoo hoo!

Did you do that kind thing

where you held her hair back
over the bowl?

She seemed to have it
under control.

Oh, right.
That speaks volumes.

Does it?

Yeah, well,
you´re in a relationship

that can´t be named.

-What does that mean?
-Waves are like relationships.

Okay, they roll in sometimes
but they don´t stick around.

Not unless you ask them to.

That makes no sense, Woody.

Waves don´t even stick around
even if you ask them to.

Exactly.
Laura´s gone, George.

Yeah, I´m... I´m fully aware
of that, thanks, Woody.

No, no, no, no. I mean,
she´s a treasured memory, right?

That´s who she is,

safely encased in
the warm embrace of your heart.

Yeah, well,
I´d like to think so.

Yeah, well,
Jan can´t ever be Laura.

It´s different, mate.

But just because it´s different
doesn´t mean it´s bad.

-I never said it was bad.
-Well, so it´s good, then?

I-I don´t know.
W-We´re just two friends who...

Blurred the lines of friendship?

[ Sighs ]

Oh, well, look,
you can always surf the foam.

GEORGE:
[ Chuckling ] The what?

Big waves, small waves...
They´re all still waves.

The question
you´ve got to ask yourself is,

are you catching the wave
or are you gonna let it go?

-Ahh.
-[ Banging counter ]

How does a woman of your age
not suffer from a hangover?

With age comes experience.

Mm.

Yeah, I was told
that, um, spewing

can alleviate the symptoms.

Is that true?

Some of us are born
with an iron constitution.

-[ Footsteps ]
-Hmm.

Hey, how was the surf?

-Didn´t quite make it.
-Oh, well, never mind.

Bacon and eggs. Help yourselves.
Excuse me.

Be kind.

I am getting too old for this.

So you do have a hangover.

Of biblical proportions.

GEORGE:
The expectations of fireworks

can in itself be a problem.

They´re expected to be loud,
colorful, exciting.

But some fireworks disappoint.

They don´t live up
to their label

and the expectations
we place upon them.

Unfortunately,
until you light the fuse...

You don´t really know
what you´re gonna get.

I love the calm
before the storm.

Pity there has to be a storm.

Any, um, similarity
is entirely coincidental.

We´re wearing
the exact same shirt.

Artistic zeitgeist.

Guy Fawkes
was an English Catholic

who in 1605
wanted to blow up Parliament

to assassinate King James I

and then install a Catholic king
onto the throne.

Uh-huh.

Yeah, but he was caught
and executed.

Well, he committed suicide.

Um, which is why we burn an
effigy of him every single year

to remind us
of the value of democracy.

So, why does that make everyone
want to bonk in the sandhills?

That´s a very good question.

Maybe the colorful fireworks

reminds people
of the warm feelings

they have for each other.

I think
it just makes them horny.

Yeah.

[ Fireworks exploding,
whistling ]

I love the smell of gunpowder
in the evening.

Are you feeling better?

Sorry,
I don´t seem to bounce back

quite as easily as I used to.

Do you feel up to
the celebrations?

The bonfire thing?

You want to go?

Why not?

You want me to come?

Of course.

But you´re not sure
in what capacity.

That´s the thing.

I don´t know what we are.

Does it have to be a big deal?

It has to be something.

You mean, are we a couple?

Or are we just
friends with benefits?

Whatever it is...

I feel like
somewhere along the way...

I lost a really good friend.

Me too.

-And I want her back.
-Me too.

Because ever since we...

Did the...
Yeah, I know.

It´s been so damned awkward.

Hasn´t it?
I mean, like, so awkward!

[ Sighs ]

God, that feels good to say.

Doesn´t it? [ Laughs ]
How old do you feel right now?

-17.
-15.

Hey, I don´t want to be
a teenager again.

No, no.
We´re way too old for that.

Yeah.

You know, uh...

I have spent
far too much of my life...

wanting to be Laura.

Having what she had.

I thought maybe...

But I´m never gonna have
what she had, and...

And that´s okay because...

I´m not her.

And I love you the way you are.

Let´s leave love out of it,
George.

Neither of us
were looking for that.

Yeah, you´re probably right.

And, you know, as, um,

curious and quaint and funny

as this lovely
little town Weld is,

it isn´t me.

I have to accept I am
unashamedly a big-city girl.

So, in answer to your question,
let´s...

Let´s go to this
crazy Guy Fawkes night...

as friends.

♫ You don´t know, dear,
what the day may bring ♫

♫ All of us here,
we will stand and sing ♫

♫ You´re my hero ♫

♫ The way
you got through it all ♫

I´m sure it was meant
as a compliment, Bill.

[ Laughs ]
Bloody cack-handed compliment.

You know, the irony
is that Guy Fawkes´ execution

was never gonna be
burning at a stake.

It was a standard hanging

followed by
being drawn and quartered.

-Uh-huh.
-Makes you think, eh?

Not really.

[ People gasping ]

BRENDA:
Aren´t they pretty, Sean?

Just like you, Brenda.

WOMAN: Quick! Write your name!
Go, go, go!

Oh, sparklers!
I love sparklers.

Oh, hey!
Come on!

[ Indistinct shouting
and laughter ]

"I am your father!"

Dad.

And here I was

thinking you were in dire need
of my help.

Okay, so here´s the deal.

I´m back for as long
as I want to stay.

I´m not going to school.
I´m done with all that.

And I´m taking my room back.

But what about me?

I-I don´t care.

-You can have my room.
-In your dreams.

ARLO: No, I mean, have my room.
I´ll sleep on the couch.

Sounds doable.

And, uh, you may need to
pay Grandpa back for the flight.

I might have used
his credit card.

And, uh,
for the taxi here, so...

You took a taxi
from the airport?

How else
was I meant to get here?

Uh, I could have come got you.

Don´t get your hopes up.

That I´m back
has nothing to do with you.

So...

do we have a deal?

Do Roger and Trish
know you´re here?

They´re probably figuring it out
about now.

You are telling them, not me.

Fair enough.

Okay.

♫ Welcome home ♫

♫ I bid you welcome ♫

[ Laughs ]

♫ I bid you welcome ♫

[ Laughter ]

♫ Welcome home ♫

[ Cheering ]

♫ From the bottom of my heart ♫

Where is he?

Who?

Monty.

I know of no one by that name.

But if you mean El Montero,
the human skyrocket,

he´s over there.

[ Wagner´s "Ride of
the Valkyries" plays ]

[ Laughing ]

[ Laughs ]
Go, Monty!

[ Laughs ]

[ Laughs ] Hey!

[ Cheering ]

WOMAN: Go, Monty!

[ Laughing ]

Hey!

Is that wise?

Ooh!

[ Groans ]

[ People gasping ]

Whoa.

TOM: Look out, guys.
Get out of the way!

Everyone stay calm!

Whoa!

[ Laughs ]

Not entirely to plan.

But good possibilities.

You´ll get ´em next year, Dad.

All right, so nothing´s
really changed here, I see.

-Not really.
-Hardly anything.

GEORGE:
With fireworks,

we make the dark side
of humanity pretty.

Amidst all this
remains the simple fact

that sometimes
we have to blow things up

to clear the air.

And start again.

I like what you´ve done
with my room, by the way.

Good night.

[ Up-tempo music plays ]