All language subtitles for The.Real.Marigold.Hotel.Series.3.1of4.720p.HDTV.x264.AAC.MVGroup.org.srt - 2

India, a country bursting with
colour and vitality.

India has made me feel so alive.

With warm weather all year round...

Hiya. ..and a low cost of living...

20. 30.

..could this be the perfect place
to retire?

As they say, the years fell away.

LAUGHTER

Wow, this is superb.

Makes you need to go for a pee.

Inspired by the blockbuster film...

I've lost my stirrups.

..nine famous faces are spending
a month in Udaipur.

Oh, lovely.

India's magical city of lakes...

I'm so out of my comfort zone.

..to see if they could spend their
golden years here.

The problem with getting older,

we all start getting highly
competitive.

About what's wrong with us.

It's too hard.

But will the challenges of India
prove a step too far?

Gee-whiz. Oh, that is putrid.

This will be a nightmare, going
shopping.

You'll be a wreck when you go home.

Oh, dearie me.

Where are we going, anyway?

Or could this incredible country be
somewhere new to call home?

India is chaos.

Which is vibrancy, which is
possibility, which is life.

It's a cool autumn morning
at Heathrow Airport.

Arriving to meet her fellow
travellers is 66-year-old

TV presenter and journalist
Selina Scott.

I think I'm the first one here.

I think I can see someone I know.

Good morning. Hello, Bob.

Also on this journey is 69-year-old
Grand National winner Bob Champion.

I think it must be 20 years or more.

A long time. It is.

You are looking very good.
Not as good as you.

It's nice to see you.

I'm not going to India to sit on a
beach for a couple of weeks,

I'm going there to see how I could
retire over there.

I think it's one of the biggest
adventures I've ever done.

Next to arrive is 74-year-old
comedian Syd Little.

Hello. Good morning.
All the best, how are you?

I'm looking forward to it.

It's taken me a long time to
get organised.

I've been married to my wife for 42
years,

I think it's the longest we've been
away from each other.

I've never even tried Indian food
in my life.

A good Yorkshire boy, no curries.

Joining them on this Indian
adventure...

Hello. Hi. Hello.

..is 67-year-old film and television
actress Susan George.

Lovely to see you.
Magical Mystery Tour.

This is all very much out of my
comfort zone.

There's no question of that.

This is uncharted waters for me.

You know, life is opportunity.

Whatever life throws at me I will
take it and grab it with both hands.

Hello, Bob. Nice to see you.

And ex-EastEnders actor, 78-year-old
Peter Dean.

Hello, all. Hello.

All right? Lovely to see everybody.
Can you manage that? There you go.

I'll team up with you.

Well, I've always wanted to go to
India because as I've got older you

become more spiritual.

When I was young people retired to
Margate or Bournemouth.

Adding to the party is married
couple

and Krankies double act Ian and
Jeanette Tough. How are you?

Long time no see.

Little and Little.

I'm rather looking forward to moving
in with other people because
Jeanette

and I have never really been apart,

so it'll be nice to have other
people to talk to.

And 70-year-old stage and screen
actress Stephanie Beacham.

I always thought when I was 70

I would be like so ahead of the
curve,

I'm not. I'm just normal. I'm 70.

My knees sometimes hurt.

Obviously I hate what I look like.

I mean, it's really tiresome to
admit.

Here is another one who looks like
a Marigold.

Finally, 77-year-old writer and
former politician Stanley Johnson.

Well, well, well.

I'm Stanley. Hi, Stanley.

Hello. We met in a pub.

We've met in a pub.

My thoughts of retirement.

It's a bit like a railway train.

I want to hit the buffers at full
speed.

Hello, Stanley.

Nice to see you. You too.

I'm looking at the '80s and '90s

as being as full of adventure
as the last six decades have been.

Are we all here?

They are travelling over 4,000
miles to Udaipur

in the northern state of Rajasthan.

Also known as the city of lakes.

The cost of living here is cheap
for Westerners

and the climate is tropical,

with hot weather for most of the
year.

There we are.

They are being met by Karim,

who will be their driver for the
duration of the stay.

Welcome to the city of lakes.
Karim here.

Thank you. Lovely weather you've got
here.

Hello.

Right. It looks completely different
than I anticipated.

Where's the black cab?

Stanley, there is room here. No, no,
no.

You go in there. No, you want to
go with Ian. It's all right.

I'm not bothered. It doesn't matter,
I see enough of him.

Here, take me coat.

See? "Take me coat".

What a performance.

So we are ready to leave for Udaipur
city.

Looking forward to it. How far is
it?

It will take about 45 minutes.

45 minutes. Yes, and it depends on
the traffic.

It looks just like the M6.

Look at this lot here. Unbelievable.

Oh, look, there is a cow
in the middle of the road.

If you killed a holy cow on the
road, would you be sent to jail?

Yes.

Yes. Seven years.

Seven years for killing the cows.

Seven years for killing a cow.

What if it is the cow's fault?

There's no such thing as health
and safety here, is there?

You're telling me. I mean,

you see it on the movies but you
think a lot of it is fictional.

But it's not, is it? It's fact.

Well, it's a bit grubby, isn't it?

For the next four weeks,

home will be in the heart of the
city on the banks of Lake Pichola,

one of the largest of Udaipur's five
lakes.

They will be living alongside the
have a million locals to establish

whether this could be the ultimate
place to retire.

This is the bypass circle
of Udaipur city.

And now we are entering the city.

We are in the city now, are we?
Entering the city.

You don't know where to look next,
do you?

And wherever you look there's an...

It is all so amazing.
There's so much going on.

It's like life happening all the
time.

It's vibrant, that's the main thing,
isn't it?

The people are coming.

Who is coming? They're taking
Ganesha.

Oh, cool. Oh, that's cool.

I think we've got a problem, though.

Before reaching their new home,

the group get an early taste
of Indian culture.

It's different.

The Ganesh festival is a public
celebration

where Hindus come together to
honour the birthday

of the elephant-headed god,
Lord Ganesh.

Somebody's birthday. He's going.
Oh, he's going.

GUNSHOT
Straight away.

Seen as the god of prosperity,

idols are worshipped and paraded
throughout the streets.

When you go abroad, you've got to
go out and embrace the life,

the way of life that they live.

And in India, that is what
I'm hoping for, yeah.

To go and sort of find out
the real India.

Yeah, the real people.

The thought of India brings colour,
excitement, and energy.

There's lots that is appealing about
going to a place

that has all this opportunity to
be and do whatever you want.

It's just going to be brilliant
encounters, that's what I imagine.

And that was just one of them.

I think if we're open to the
encounters, we're going to have a
blast.

Now, less than a mile away
from their new home,

the senior citizens are travelling

through the gates of Udaipur's
walled city,

into the heart of the old town.

This is what I like. This is real
life to me.

This is like the old markets years
ago, isn't it?

Everything going on.

Oh, look, there it is.

Amet Haveli. I bet that's the one.

For the next month, the group are
taking over a haveli,

a traditional Indian town house
built around a courtyard.

Oh, my goodness me.

This ancestral home is owned
by Mr Prabhu Prakash Singh

and his wife Rani,

and shared by three generations of
their extended family.

Hello. How are you?

Thank you. You're welcome.

Thank you.

Pleased to meet you. Nice to meet
you.

Welcome. Good luck. Thank you so
much.

I am prepared to throw myself into
most things in life and I think the

Indian experience will be
interesting.

I think when you've never been
somewhere, you don't know what to
expect.

Is this... Who is this? My uncle,
I grew up with him. Did you?

Running the haveli is Mr Singh's
niece, Swati...

Selina. Hello.

Pleased to meet you. ..and grandson
and heir, Jay.

So we have the tea and everything
ready there.

You just be comfortable.

THEY SIGH

Tea is all right but it's different.

It might be the milk.

You like green tea now anyway.

It's just a phase I went through.

Oh, that's a good cup of tea.

That's a good cup of tea. It is a
good cup of tea, isn't it?

So we'll show you all your rooms.

Three rooms, we'll show you.

And then you can decide if you like.

We'll start fighting like cats.

I think you should just give us our
rooms.

I'm OK with a group of people but

I've never been with a group of
people

for a full month, usually four days
is my limit.

I'm a maharani, am I?

Oh, isn't that beautiful?

It's like Venice.

I guess I have a solitary nature.

And I know that I love my own
company.

So that's going to be a bit of a
challenge.

Well, you couldn't have given me a
more beautiful room.

Thank you. I'm glad you like the
room.

Because you have to spend a lot of
time with us here.

I'll need a ladder to get up.

Can you get up? Take a run at it.

Oh, you made it. Ta-da! You've burst
your flowers.

When we came from the airport
I thought, "I hope..."

But then you just come in here and
it's just stunning.

Oh, beautiful.

Oh, it's just gorgeous.

Thank you. What a beautiful house
you live in.

Oh, yeah.

That's fantastic, that.

Let me feel the pillows.

Oh, oh, yes.

There's only one thing missing and
that's the missus.

Oh, bless her.

Hello.

Right, this is...

Oh, golly.

I've just got to think about this.

Be in a calmer frame of mind.

Let's just try it this way.

I think my job insofar as I have a
job, I guess, is to be cheerful.

You know, that's the number one.

Isn't that the number one rule in
life?

In fact, I may be wrong,
but I'm sure rule number one

of the Scouting Manual was,

"A scout smiles and whistles under
all difficulties."

We're getting terribly close.

Oh, look at that!

18, 8.

Which is actually my birthday.

Right.

For the next month,

the group will have to learn to live
together

as they become accustomed to
the Indian way of life.

Isn't this pretty?

What a lovely day.

For some, getting used to the daily
curries is just the start.

Oh, heaven. I'll have everything.

Is it chicken?

That'll do, thank you.

So, Bob, first curry?

A little bit strange but very, very
tasty.

What's strange, the curry or the
first time?

Strange the first time.

To be honest, I don't know why I've
never tried Indian food.

You know, I've heard how spicy it
is and I'm thinking

maybe I've been frightened to.

What a place to have your very first
curry. In India.

Well, I'm having it in the right
place, aren't I? You surely are.

I don't know, but something in
there blew my tongue off.

LAUGHTER

I'll tell you, when we first came
here I must admit

I thought there's no way I could
retire here.

Then I get here and see a different
world.

I'll think about it.

Can I just say that I would like to
know how

we might be able to fit into
this society here.

Yes. I think it's important to find
out.

And also, I'm single, I don't know
about anybody else, so if

I teamed up with an Indian lady, you
know.

You looking? I'm looking.

No, I'm just wondering. I mean, how
would people accept it?

Someone who landed Peter would be
making a real coup. I don't know
about that.

This is completely true.

This is not blind Indian date.

Just a minute. Yes.

Living in the historic Amet Haveli
on the banks of Lake Pichola,

the group have a month to decide

whether India is a place they could
call home.

It'd be a wonderful place to wake up
to every morning, wouldn't it?

Look at those buildings.

Spectacular.

If you tell me when you want
something,

what you want, and then I'll get it
out because I don't want you
going...

Yes, mummy.

You would think I was 12.

You're no' very tidy.

With its five famous lakes and
bountiful gardens,

rising at dawn to keep fit is an
essential part

of everyday life for the
residents of Udaipur.

Good morning. Good morning.

Morning. Morning. Keen to embrace
the way Indians live,

Stanley is heading 15 minutes north
of the haveli to Lake Fateh Sagar.

OK. How are you today? Very well,
thank you.

I'm going to have an early-morning
swim, I'm looking forward to that.

It's always a good idea to have
an early-morning swim.

If the opportunity presents itself,
and indeed it has.

But I certainly wouldn't imagine
retiring

without being within striking
distance

of water of one kind or another.

Stan's not going to swim in there,
is he?

I would certainly close my mouth
if I was swimming in there.

You would not get me in there.

Fantastic.

Wow.

Hey, hey, hey. Look at this.

It is clean water and mountain
views,

for the locals it's a popular spot
to start the day.

What a lovely place this is and nice
to think

the average Udaipur commuter
can pop in here

before he heads off to the office.

Say when. Go, go. OK.

I plunge in, I splash around,
I like it,

because it's a way of taking
exercise

without having to serve an overarm
at tennis.

I don't feel any particular signs
of ageing.

Someone said to me the other day,
you know, "Can you do a handstand?"

I said, "Of course I can do a
handstand", and I did a handstand.

It was a perfect handstand. The only
thing was all the money fell out of

my pocket onto the floor.

It's a great place to come, isn't
it?

Do you come here every morning?

Not every morning, no.

Yes.

Can I help you? I'm fine, thank
you very much. You are fine, OK.

Well done, very nice to see you,
sir.

OK, sir. Thank you for your help.
Have a good day. Bye-bye.

Back at the haveli...

Namaste.

..the rest of the group are
preparing for their morning
exercise.

Nice temperature this morning,
isn't it?

Welcome to India.

A short walk from their new home
on the banks of Lake Pichola,

they're meeting local yoga teacher,
Paveen.

Please come. You can watch me
easily.

Yoga is all about the health of
mind, body and soul.

You remove all the medical
conditions, you increase your
performance,

you increase your flexibility,

and for this strengthening purpose
we start

yoga with the yoga warm up.

A little smile on your face, not too
much.

Little, little. Inhale up...

This ancient Indian custom is
already a familiar pastime for

some of the group.

When you smile it releases the good
hormones,

relieves the stress, relieves the
pain.

I love yoga.

Exhale.

I love meditation, and to be
encouraged

to do daily meditation and yoga can
only be just bliss.

Inhale.

You make better decisions after
you've done an hour and a half of
yoga.

Inhale.

I started yoga about 30 years ago.

The route to yoga for me was
exercise that I enjoyed.

It definitely didn't come into my
life by way of umm-ing

and omm-ing and all that.

You any further than me?

I think that's it. Slowly come back.

Relax. I thought you would just come
here and lay there and pray or do

something more... God, it was hard
work.

If you can, you touch your head on
the floor.

I've got quite a few injuries and
the majority of the time jockeys

are in aches and pains, actually.

Relax. Relax.

I like that word.

In my era, a couple of brandies
would take away the pain,

well, used to help, anyway.

Thank you.

My father-in-law said old age sucks.

And he's right. Might be right
there, too.

Thank you.

Right, hands up all those who would
do that again?

Me. Me. Would you?

Yeah, I would do it, yeah.

Us three are not sure, are we?

I wouldn't mind doing it again if it
was toned down a little bit to begin

with. The older you get you can't
move.

If I started early in my life.

It is not a sport, you haven't got
to win.

We were not trying to win.

Just trying to do it.

If the group are to consider a
life in India...

Namaste. Namaste. Are we going that
way?

..they'll need to discover what the
local neighbourhood has to offer.

That's good wiring, isn't it?

Just look at it. No wonder we can't
get a signal on our phones.

Is there any rules what side we walk
on?

No, there's no rules what side they
drive on.

Stanley and The Krankies are in need
of a few home comforts.

We're looking for a whisky shop.

I think we passed one when we came
in in the taxi.

Yes. What was it called? Was it not
just called The Wine Shop?

English Wine Shop. English wine
shop, well, that would be absolutely
fine.

Drinking alcohol is not common
practice in India,

which means a trip to

the edge of the old town.

They're doing their washing in
there.

Jeanette. What? They're doing their
washing.

I know, I saw her.

Unlike first-timers The Krankies,

Stanley is a seasoned traveller to
India.

Stan? Would you swim in there?
I'm not going to swim here, no.

They're not careful what they put
in that lake.

I'll tell you something, being here
is terrific.

It brought me back in no uncertain
terms to, you know,

the India I have known over what is
now more than 40 years.

So, yes, great to be back.

You're never going to get the
hygiene

as long as the religion allows this.

The one thing that may upset
not...maybe me...

but might upset Jeannette more
than me would be the poverty.

I am expecting quite a backward
country.

That's a bad word to say, backward,
it's not their fault.

But pretty basic.

The donkey carrying all those
bricks.

Does that upset you?

Well, it's a very, very, very busy
town.

The noise of the traffic, you know,
the horns peeping all the time.

Is that the wine shop we passed?
No, no, it's not. It's another one.

Oh, my goodness. Traffic coming.

If I was living anywhere here it
would have to be out of town.

I don't think... I couldn't live
within the hubbub of that.

We're too westernised for that,
really, I think.

Hello. Hello, very well. Here we go.

I want some red wine.

If you're going to retire here, Ian.

You're going to have to suss out
this wine... That's a Shiraz.

What do you have in terms of whisky?

This is Indian whisky, is that
right?

720. 720. I'm going to have the
Indian blue,

called something-something
blue. There will be a better one.

2,100. 25 quid.

Coming every day? Every day, yes.

Do you deliver? Yes, yes, deliver.

There you go. Home delivery.

Thank you. Quite dear. Yeah, I
thought quite dear.

Well, you can't get a bottle of wine
for �8 in England now.

You can if you go to Lidl and Aldi.

�4.50 these days.

Not Westminster wine shop.

Oh, that was frightening. It was an
eye-opener.

Jeannette went from crying to
laughing, to being terrified.

There were a load of donkeys passed.
I was in the middle and the traffic
came in,

and I was in the middle and these
donkeys were...

She was in the middle of them like
that, terrified.

It was terrifying. It's when you
come through these gates it's so
different, isn't it?

It's another world, isn't it? It is
just another world.

Back at the haveli, it's lunchtime,
and for the senior citizens,

another curry. Thank you.

That's fine.

Now, what's the difference between a
maharajah and a maharana?

Maharajah, and maharana, it's the
same thing,

it's just the regions call it by a
different name.

But I want to know where he's
the maharana of?

Over there in that paddock. I know.

LAUGHTER
I'm going to slap you.

And you've managed to put up with
him for how long?

53 years. 53 years.

I met her in a theatre.

Was it twinkle at first sight?

No. She fancied my brother first.

I don't blame her, I haven't seen
your brother but it has to be
better.

It's fun, it reminds
me of, you know,

going back to school, first term at
school,

with a lot of new boys and girls.

Not that we had any new girls when I
went to school.

You don't know, you get to know
them.

The basic principles are the same.

Rub along with humour and interest.

Have you got a dog?

I haven't got a dog now, because
I've been away so much, you know.

Oh, don't.

My poor doggies are endlessly in
doggy prison.

What have you missed while you've
been here?

I could do with change from curry.

See, I like calf's liver and veal
and things like that.

Oh. I don't think you'll get that
here, will you? No, I won't.

You know, meat and two veg.

That's how I've been brought up.

Cauliflower, broccoli.

Roasted in the oven. Roast potatoes.

Everything. And mint sauce.

Oh, yes.

Bob, bless him. It's the first time
he's ever had a curry here.

He sort of puts on a brave face and
says,

"Oh, you know, it was nice, it was
nice."

But I don't know if he'll go home
and say the same thing, you know.

It would be lovely if we could get
something like

a potato and some fish and make
fish, chips and mushy peas.

I think he would love that.

I've got no money.
I've got some here.

Have you? Yes, yes.

With Bob yearning for a taste of
home,

keen cooks Ian and Syd have decided
to prepare dinner for the group.

Venturing further afield to the
outskirts of the old town,

they're off to Dal Mandi market.

Hello. I've not seen many...

Not seen many spicy...

..not seen many veggie things, have
you?

One of the biggest food bazaars
in Udaipur,

within yards you can buy spices,

vegetables and meat, at a fraction
of the cost of the UK.

I love cabbage. I love cabbage.

Cabbage and... I love cabbage.

Cabbage and cauliflower.

This looks like a market, Bob.

Bob doesn't care, he just went.

He is a jockey, isn't he?

To buy fresh produce at the cheapest
price you need to barter like a
local.

Who's going to try and find
out how much they cost?

That's a good cabbage. Bob is the
cashier.

20, not 60, 20.

No, 50. 30.

How much for a cauliflower?

120. 130?

That's dearer than England.

60p for a cabbage.

Potatoes over there,
let's try the potatoes.

Ten rupees, one kilo.

One kilo, ten rupees.

That's cheap. That's good.

That's more like it.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Come on, lads.

Jesus.

Watch it, Bob.

With vegetables bought, next stop -
the local butchers.

That's mutton. Legs. Only legs like
this.

Have you got anything that's got
meat on it.

It's got the tail and its testicles
and everything.

I'm not eating one of them. Look at
its little tail.

Oh, it's frozen, yeah.

No breast.

We don't like...

Lamb chop. Meat.

He'll produce a chicken now.

Well, we could have a chicken.

I don't want to look, I don't want
to look.

I'm not going to look.
It used to have a head.

Oh, dear. We'll have to have that,
now.

We'll just have one. It is still
alive, it's twitching.

It's only energy, it's dead.

Oh, there you go. That's better,
that's better.

That was alive. What do you
think, two of them?

Oh, no.

Oh, no. Here we go again.

I can have a bit of chicken. You're
looking forward to that. I am.

Do you think because they're so
fresh they'll taste better?

Yes. Will they?
600. 600 rupees.

600 rupees.

Yes, that's not bad.

That's not bad. That's really cheap.

For less than �10 Ian and Syd will
be able to feed everyone roast

chicken and all the trimmings.

Hey, whose idea was that?

Well, that was an experience and a
the half that was. I mean,

have I gone green? It's really...

Oh, I'm so... I've never seen that
before

and I don't think I want to see it
again.

THEY CLUCK LIKE CHICKENS

Well, we were looking for lamb.

But we bought two chickens, but they
were alive.

Oh, don't tell me.

I can't.

Where are they now, then?
In this bag.

But it will be lovely, it will be
lovely.

It will be fresh. You'll just have
to forget what you saw.

Oh, Syd.
I don't think I'll ever forget that.

I think that's awful.

How can I eat...

I don't think I can. We could go
into detail, but we won't.

I don't want you to go into detail.

I mean, I know that they've got to
kill chickens

and I suppose they must've had
a good life.

They weren't the prettiest...
Oh, no.

What do you think? I think we should
put them on soon and get going.

I should start peeling, yes.

With a roast dinner to prep
for the group,

Ian and Syd head to the kitchen.

Syd and I have known each other for
years. Casually known each other.

We've done the odd show together,
done tours together.

This is giving me a chance to really
gel with him.

Is that salt? Yes, that's salt.

You put it all on the floor.

That's another thing you forget,

especially when you're getting
older.

That maybe you let a friend go by,
and then don't see him enough,

then when you re-meet like this you
think to yourself,

"Why did I not keep in touch because
this is great fun?

"We really get on well."

Right, Syd. Stock.

Chicken stock. Yes.

This is the chicken stock.

I like it thin, me, don't you?
Thin-ish. Oh, yes.

But a bit of body, though.

Tell me what you think.
It's not hot, that's why.

I think it needs a bit of salt,
don't you?

Talk of a northerner, you see.

This is beautiful. Taste it now.

That's it. The salt did it, the salt
did it. Is it OK? Yes.

So this is a curry you've made?

No. We've done a roast dinner.

Fantastic. How lovely is that?

The chickens were alive.

No, why are you... Don't tell them.

What we've got tonight, we've
got fresh roast chicken,

you can have a leg or you can have
breast.

And roast potatoes and chicken
gravy, handmade by me.

Hey, those potatoes look amazing.

That'll be fine. Nice, aren't they?

Potatoes. Lovely.

You're the man. They must have been
very chunky chickens, though.

Excited, Bob?

Not one curry powder in there.

I know, it's brilliant. Not one
spice.

I must tell you, there is a bit of
Worcester sauce in this.

I like Worcester sauce. Oh, well,
there you go. That's in the gravy.

I mean, we've made this great effort
to find whisky on our first day and

I thought, "Well, this is the
moment."

It is. I'm actually glad we didn't
get the lamb, really.

Well, it was a goat. It was a goat.

I have nine little goats and I hate
the thought of, you know...

I couldn't ever send them to market.

Since I've been here,
I've become more aware, haven't you?

Animals in everyday life.

I know. I'm looking at Jeanette,
look at your face.

When Ian and I started our act we
used to do weekly variety,

and we would be in a different town
every week.

So from the very, very beginning
of our career

we were able to mix with people
and get to know whether

you liked them or whether you didn't
like them.

Have lots and lots of laughs,
and I think this is about the same.

Used to living alone,

youngest member of the group Selina
isn't feeling quite as settled.

I'm not used to being with people.

I'm used to being very much on my
own in my...

And I tend to do things where I want
to do them and I go off and I do

them. And although I love being with
them all, and they are all

interesting, really interesting
people,

from a very personal perspective,
the group thing is difficult.

The group are three days into their
stay in India.

After settling into life in Udaipur,

today they have the chance to head
further afield.

I so much want to see some more of
India.

Look at it. It just goes on forever.

So I'm going to have a cup of
coffee.

One thing that has to be said,
the coffee is rubbish.

I've always been greedy, whether

it's show business, or theatre,
whatever.

"That's what I want, thank you."
And take.

But the last few months I've managed
to not quite know what I want.

And I thought, I've got to have some
direction.

A new direction. Maybe it's not
going to be in the acquisitive way,

maybe it's going to be in a more
peaceful way.

Considering a calmer way of life,
Stephanie

is heading off with Peter and Syd
to an ashram.

It's very simple,

where we're going, because
apparently it is like a monastery or

something but you're in a room and,
yeah, I'm getting quite...

Not anxious, but you don't know what
you're going to get.

Here we are and we've got to go to
there.

The others are off to explore
Jodhpur, Rajasthan's blue city.

I've never been to Jodhpur before.

Although I have worn Jodhpurs,
you know,

as one does in one's pony club days.

Come on, girls and boys.

After you. Thank you.

Taking a bus, they'll be travelling
160 miles to Jodhpur,

where Grand National winner Bob

has been invited to play polo
with one of India's oldest clubs.

All my life I've loved horses,

I was brought up with them when I
was a kid.

And from about the age of seven,
I only wanted to be a jockey.

But, you know, every type of horse
always gave me pleasure.

You know, if it wasn't for a horse,
I wouldn't be me.

Someone told me it before,
is it right that it's Jodhpurs?

Is that where they were made?

Yes, I think it was, actually.

So how many races
did you actually win?

500 odd. Wow.

The Grand National and the horse,
I can't remember it now,

what was it called? Aldaniti.
Aldaniti.

And was it a male or a female?

A gelding. The majority of
jumpers are geldings.

Are they? Yes, because if they bang
their parts on a fence,

they don't like it. I never thought
of that.

Here's another one coming up
she's going to miss.

The group are halfway into their
six-hour journey.

This will be interesting, won't it?

Are you having a pee?

OK, is it? You've just got to
pee in the corner. Oh, dear.

How did you manage, Steph?

I laid my lavatory paper over the
seat.

I just want to figure out how
if you do a number two...

In a number one.

In a number one, how do you squat
down? Virtually impossible.

It is virtually impossible, yeah.

Well, I took a picture of mine but I
won't show you.

Interesting. Very interesting.

I'm not sitting down.
I'm just going to get some crisps.

Hello. Do you have coffee?
One coffee.

This is cappuccino, frothy,
Indian-style.

Yes. Thank you.

Hot... Or something like
that, I don't know.

I love to try new things but I'm
just not sure...

Thank you very much.

I've gone with very simple things,
a packet of Ritz biscuits.

That was truly disgusting.

What? I just said that was truly
disgusting.

What was it? What was it you had?
A packet of crisps.

I mean, I don't eat crisps.

Well, you have now.

While most of the group continue
their trip to Jodhpur, Stephanie,

Syd and Peter are travelling 50
miles east of the city

to visit the ashram.

Here we go.

They'll be staying amongst a
community

who are searching for spiritual
enlightenment.

Welcome. Hello. Stephanie.

They are being met by Shrijan

who helps run the retreat alongside
the Guru.

I know nothing of your Guru.

He inherited the title?

Yes, he was elected in this position
of saint at aged five.

OK. This is Stephanie.

Stephanie. Hello.

Nice to meet you.

Syd. Syd.

And this is Surajnath Siddh.

Siddh, my name. Oh!

Looking forward. We're also looking
forward to meet all of you.

Anything we can do for you to make
the stay wonderful, you tell me.

Thank you.

Started over 500 years ago,

Shri Jasnath Ashram is one of
the oldest

in the Marwar region and attracts
people from

all over the world who are seeking
rejuvenation of the body and mind.

We help women and children, we are
ecologists and we plant trees,

we take care of the water.

We are helping people. So let me
show you your rooms.

I think you gentlemen are in the top
floor.

As well as offering a donation,

visitors are expected to earn their
keep by carrying out daily chores.

Oh. There you are, Syd.

Which one do you want? We'll leave
the middle one in case I snore.

Get you further away from me.

That's the only fear I've got.

Maybe they might have a cure for
snoring.

I was nervous about coming here
because, you know,

it's totally different to anything
you've experienced anywhere else.

Well, it is for me, anyway.

It's OK. What else do you
want in life?

I mean, the only thing that I think
that's missing...

TV. ..is pictures.

Yes. There's no pictures so...

I think you're supposed to find
yourself

so that'll be interesting,
if I can find myself.

Whoever that is.

How's your room? OK, good. You let
me know if you need anything.

Is that the right greeting, though.
Namaste.

So I'm connecting with you here at
my heart level,

and I'm connecting with you here
at the eye, the intellect level.

So we are connected. OK.

Forever. You are right.

Your eyes are getting bigger.
Exactly, it works.

The rest of the group have arrived
in Jodhpur.

Twice the size of Udaipur with a
population of one and half million,

it is Rajasthan's second largest
city.

Hello. Good morning.

Good morning. Searching for riding
wear for tomorrow's polo, Bob,

Susan and Stanley are making the
most of India's low-cost tailoring.

Hello.

Namaste. How are you? I haven't had
a pair of jodhpurs for a very long
time.

You have to measure me? You can
choose the fabric first.

That looks very nice. That green
khaki colour would be absolutely
fine for me. Stain resistant.

I think that's great.

Shall I start the measurement?
OK.

Jodhpur trousers take their name
from the city where they were first

invented in 1890.

You have a very good calf.

Loosely cut at the hip but tight
around the ankle,

the comfy fit is ideal for horse
riding.

I've always been made to dress
smart,

and being a professional jockey
in my

era I used to ride out, I always had
to be in Jodhpurs, very clean boots,

ties and everything.

That's been the way of life and I
don't suppose I've ever changed.

I can be scruffy occasionally if I'm
doing things out in the garden.

Mr Bob. Bob, yes.

High-waist? Yes, high-waisted.

Yes, I like to think it's 36 but
you're going to tell me it's 38,

aren't you?

38 and a half. 38 and a half. That
is very bad.

For around �50 they're getting a
bespoke pair made in less than four
hours.

I can't wait for it.

And we will see you later.
Thank you.

I wish I'd brought more shirts now

because... We're not going out
dancing

tonight, Syd. I mean to sweat.

We're doing yoga.

Put it out there, it will be OK in
this heat.

That's what I've done back in the...
Yeah? Yeah.

At the ashram, Stephanie,

Syd and Peter are embracing the
wisdom of the Guru.

OK.

Just bend the right and then place.

If you can, yes. Then long tree...

..and then tree with branches.

And then with exhalation, drop.

When he was doing a chat to us he
has such a fantastic voice, you
weren't

listening or thinking like,

"Oh, I wonder what's happening back
home or that sort of thing."

You were absolutely concentrating on
what he was telling you.

Then little bit switch, like you are
reaching to something, then drop.

And what he was saying was going in,
in there.

Look to the right side.

And then left.

Keep your back straight.

And then we can make the free
movement up and down.

With smiling face.

Very good. Now we stop the practice.

I wish I had the word power to
explain it.

It's just a different way of life
being in tune with nature, people,

everything is in harmony here.

Even the feeling the place has
created.

I'll be the scarecrow.

No, I definitely am the tin man.

You're the tin man. You're the lion,
then.

It's dawn at the ashram.

And for the community, their daily
chores are under way.

You're doing well, I think.

What are these little beasties here?

Oh, they're woodlice. I never
thought I'd find woodlice in India.

It's a great journey to go on.

I can see why the Beatles came out
here in the '60s at the height of
their

career and they found this Guru,
like we did, more or less.

They wrote an album and you can hear
all the influences.

The sitars and everything else.

It was fantastic.

It's got thorns on it.

So where are you, Stephanie?
What brought you here to India?

I reckon I'm three quarters cooked.

I'm probably four fifths cooked.

But I think that I've got to just do
the last bit differently.

OK. I've done a lot of success,
success, success.

Hard work, hard work, hard work.

I think that I'm needing big
regeneration.

Now. There's that now problem.

It takes time.

Keen to make the most of their stay,

the three senior citizens are taking
a lesson in self-discovery.

Are we going straight to meditation?

One thing at a time. Stop worrying
about what we're doing next.

Ready for meditation?

Oh, I like that.

I've never tried meditation for the
simple reason that I can't sit
for five

minutes, I've got to be doing
something. So you have these
or these.

All the same. They both have a seat
and a back.

I need to be that. That's...

Rose between two thorns.

There must be something in it
because if you can actually just
sit down

and clear your head and have nothing
in there, that's the hard bit.

You know, how can you not have
nothing in your head?

How do you feel? I feel OK.

Meditation, you need not so much
movement.

OK. We'll try.

A half-hour meditation class helps
to transform the mind

and encourage positive thinking.

Visualise your body, each and every
inhalation and exhalation.

THEY CHANT

I was pretending to be calm but the
irritation and anger I was feeling

towards these poor flies as they
were crawling over my face was so
deep.

You can open your eyes or you can
move.

I have such aggression in me.

I was wanting to kill flies nearly
the entire time.

The flies didn't bother me.

I had pain. In my legs and I
thought, "I can't move".

Yeah. I didn't move and it went
away.

And breathing is very much connected
to your mind.

Because whenever we stress, our
breathing pattern gets disturbed.

It's gushed out of me.

A lot of what I think that that sort
of anger

and aggression, the needed female
force. Yeah.

When that comes up it is sometimes
not very pretty. No.

And it comes out fast and messy.

They weren't tears of sadness,
it was like a release.

Come into proper reality, Stephanie.

You can laugh at yourself.

Don't layer up all the defences.

And it was a sort of...

"Oh, thank goodness for that".

Now is your moment to celebrate.

Because that means you're one layer
away. I don't feel weaker.

I feel stronger for having...

All right, Stanley?
Oh, my God, fantastic.

You've been wearing jodhpurs since
you were a baby, of course.

Back in Jodhpur, the senior citizens

are kitted out in their
newly-tailored riding wear.

Bob's coming out of retirement,

and going back in the saddle
accompanied by Susan and Stanley.

Sit here. I'll sit down the middle.

Feet on the front. Yes.

I was very fortunate.
I was quite a successful jockey.

Good one! Obviously you have the
knack.

Very good. Winning the Grand
National was always my dream.

OK. Slowly. Don't worry.

Crossing the line, you know, the
first thing I thought was,

"It would be lovely to win it again
next year."

I went there the following year,
fell at the first fence.

So, ups and downs.

Let's go, come on.

The modern game of polo was started
in northern India in the 1850s and

soon became popular with the ruling
class.

Now he manages to get it.

Once a game for tribesman,

it's believed to date back over
2,000 years.

That's good.

That's got it.

Jodhpurs, difficult to bend your
knee in them.

Thank you.

There we are.

Bit tight. Has anybody got a ball?

Any spare balls?

I missed it. I think it might be a
little bit easier

when you're going a little bit
quicker, actually, to get behind it.

That's it, and again, please.
Oops! So sorry.

I'll be lucky if I hit it at all.

You've got it.

Thankfully, I was hitting the ball,
which is the main thing.

A bit of practice I'm sure I could
do it.

But I think they're a little bit
good and a lot younger than me.

I'm a retired man.

We're trying to gallop home.

No, I can manage.

Oh, God. It is all good.

Thank you very much, really enjoyed
it.

Well done. I don't think I hit the
ball once.

Thank you very much. See you all.

Madam, may I join you?

Yes, come on. Sit down.

Oh, my goodness, it is hot,
isn't it? This is hot. Isn't it hot?

Selina and The Krankies are taking a
200-rupee tuk-tuk ride through

the streets of the old town to see
Jodhpur's famous Mehrangarh jfort.

Isn't it fabulous?

I mean, the best market I think I've
ever seen. Wow-ee.

I think we might get to a bit of
tarmac in a minute.

Driving in a tuk-tuk is obviously a
bit of a hazardous experience.

India has one of the highest death
rates on roads in the world.

It's about time to tell us.

Just thought you should know.

Oh, deary me.

Believed to once home India's
highest Brahmin caste,

many of the Indigo houses still
line the city's medieval streets.

This will be a nightmare going
shopping every day like this.

You'd be a wreck when you go home.

I mean, I live on a farm and there
is a lot of muck around.

Yes. And so I've become more basic,
I suppose, as I've grown older.

You get used to it.

You get used to it, if you're here
you get used to it.

I really like Jeanette and Ian and
one of the reasons is

that I used to live in Scotland and
it's just great to immediately...

..you hear that accent and that
humour.

Look at the size of those ants.

Oh, my goodness. Don't think you
want one of them to bite you.

Jeez-o, there's one on your shoe.

I think they are hilarious,
actually, the two of them together.

You know, they've been a married
couple for 48 years or something
like that.

It's incredible. So when he forgets
something,

Ian asks Jeanette to fill in the
gaps.

Isn't that wonderful? To have
someone who can fill in the gaps of
your

life so you don't have to think of
names or worry about things like
that.

Set 400 feet above the city,

the imposing Mehrangarh Fort dates
back to the 15th century

and is known as the
Citadel of the Sun.

I mean, to come here in the middle
of Rajasthan

and see this, it's just, it's
mind-blowing, actually.

You never quite expected it.

Look at that. It's stone and wood
and fretwork and...

Just incredible.

Wow. This is just superb.

If we walk up there, sunset.
We can see the sunset, yes.

As night falls, Stanley Susan
and Bob

join Selina and the Krankies
to witness one of

Rajasthan's most spectacular sights.

Oh, my lord. Look, look, look at
that.

Look at the blue city. Unbelievable.

It's really mind-boggling, isn't it?

When you think of the wars that were
fought,

the fighting that went on here over
all those years.

It's intoxicating on many levels.

It's life and colour, in every shape
and form.

People shouting, the noise is
incredible.

Everything. My first impressions of
India, just pure gold, isn't it?

With the sun setting on their stay
at the ashram, Syd,

Stephanie and Peter witness the
ancient ritual of fire walking.

Dating back centuries,

it's a highly-skilled custom that
takes many years of practice.

I hope they don't ask us to join in.

Oh, I mean...

I've had things thrown at me,
but not hot coals.

Don't take it personally.

Oh, no. Did you see that?

He's still got it in his mouth.

It's gone all the way round.
He hasn't spat it out yet.

It's like, "Children, do not do that
at home."

That is faith on a level that I
don't know that I've experienced
before.

Theirs, not mine.
I mean, that was ridiculous.

What can you say?
I mean, I'm just flabbergasted.

Did you see his feet? Can I feel?

It's just like ours.
Yeah, they're just like ours.

I don't know, I don't think I'll
sleep tonight.

I'm so glad I came to India.

I wouldn't have missed it
for the world.

It is just an exciting place to be.

All together, lads.

Put your shoes on and don't be so
daft.

You just don't know what's round the
corner.

You've got to be here to believe
what you see.

How do you keep your bum in the
saddle?

You're not supposed to have

your bum in the saddle if you're a
jockey. All right.

..our nine senior citizens settle
into life in India.

Knead. I'm kneading, I'm kneading.

And have you been married?
No, I'm single.

You're single? That's why you look
young.

HE SPEAKS LOCAL LANGUAGE

Oh, yes. And the group venture
further afield to visit one of the

country's holiest cities.

Oh, my lord. Look at this.

It's like the '60s, man.
Just like the '60s.