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1
00:00:02,016 --> 00:00:04,016
Did I just cut in line?
2
00:00:17,016 --> 00:00:20,016
Bye, Caesar!
Thanks for all the salad!
3
00:00:20,017 --> 00:00:23,007
Caesar:
Et tu, Uncle Grandpa!
4
00:00:23,013 --> 00:00:25,013
[ Munching ]
5
00:00:25,007 --> 00:00:26,007
Checkmate.
6
00:00:26,013 --> 00:00:28,023
That's game,
Tiny Miracle.
7
00:00:28,017 --> 00:00:29,997
You've beat me, Mr. Gus.
8
00:00:30,006 --> 00:00:31,996
Good game.
-Good game.
9
00:00:32,004 --> 00:00:35,014
Sweet sassafras, Mr. Gus!
10
00:00:35,012 --> 00:00:38,012
You bested a robot
at chess?
11
00:00:38,014 --> 00:00:42,014
You're a real-life
chess master!
12
00:00:42,013 --> 00:00:43,013
Thanks.
13
00:00:43,013 --> 00:00:45,013
[ Chomping ]
Don't mention it.
14
00:00:45,011 --> 00:00:48,021
Hey! Anybody can beat
Tiny Miracle.
15
00:00:49,001 --> 00:00:53,011
You ain't a realchess master
until you beat me--
16
00:00:53,007 --> 00:00:58,017
Pizza Steve --
master of all things!
17
00:00:58,023 --> 00:01:00,013
Wow.
18
00:01:00,012 --> 00:01:03,022
All this time, we've been living
with a real-life chess master.
19
00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:05,001
Who knew?
20
00:01:05,005 --> 00:01:07,015
You could probably beat me
pretty easy, huh?
21
00:01:07,021 --> 00:01:10,021
I mean, it might take me
a couple of moves, but...
22
00:01:10,018 --> 00:01:12,018
[ Chuckles ]
23
00:01:12,017 --> 00:01:14,007
Oh, yes.
24
00:01:14,010 --> 00:01:16,010
Well, let's you and me
play, then.
25
00:01:16,016 --> 00:01:19,996
Loser has to run around
the block -- naked.
26
00:01:20,004 --> 00:01:22,024
What? N-naked?
27
00:01:22,021 --> 00:01:24,021
Nope, nope, nope,
nope, nope, nope.
28
00:01:24,023 --> 00:01:26,013
Do not have time
for this.
29
00:01:26,012 --> 00:01:28,012
Unfortunately,
I've got a date
30
00:01:28,012 --> 00:01:31,002
with Tiny Miracle to
teach him about arm bars.
31
00:01:31,002 --> 00:01:32,022
Isn't that right,
Tiny Miracle?
32
00:01:32,018 --> 00:01:34,998
I have no such event plannedon my Tiny Cal.
33
00:01:35,005 --> 00:01:38,005
Man, how you gonna do me
like that, Tiny Miracle?!
34
00:01:38,008 --> 00:01:39,018
Come on up here, lil' slice,
35
00:01:39,023 --> 00:01:43,013
unless you're not actually
a realchess master...
36
00:01:43,008 --> 00:01:46,008
[ Growls ]
All right, fine!
37
00:01:46,010 --> 00:01:48,010
But I'm gonna waste you!
38
00:01:48,009 --> 00:01:51,019
Okay, chess master,
your move.
39
00:01:52,023 --> 00:01:54,013
[ Grunts ]
40
00:01:54,013 --> 00:01:56,023
Man, this ain't T-ball.
41
00:01:56,017 --> 00:01:58,017
Quit playing around,
Pizza Steve.
42
00:01:58,020 --> 00:02:00,020
I know, I know!
[ Sighs ]
43
00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:02,000
All right.
44
00:02:02,006 --> 00:02:03,006
Oh, no!
45
00:02:03,015 --> 00:02:05,005
Sorry!
I slipped and fell!
46
00:02:05,015 --> 00:02:07,005
We can't play anymore!
47
00:02:07,012 --> 00:02:08,022
Oh, no need to worry.
48
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:10,010
This board is waterproof,
49
00:02:10,012 --> 00:02:13,022
in case I ever get to play
poolside at the Montego.
50
00:02:13,022 --> 00:02:16,002
[ Grunts, coughs ]
51
00:02:16,005 --> 00:02:19,995
Oh, yeah.
I play there allthe time.
52
00:02:20,004 --> 00:02:22,004
Mm-hmm, sure you do.
53
00:02:22,004 --> 00:02:24,024
Now, what was it you
were gonna do again?
54
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,010
Waste me?
55
00:02:26,010 --> 00:02:28,000
[ Grunts ]
Check.
56
00:02:28,005 --> 00:02:29,015
Whoa!
57
00:02:29,017 --> 00:02:33,007
You're about to beat
Pizza Steve!
58
00:02:33,008 --> 00:02:34,018
[ Yawns ]
59
00:02:34,021 --> 00:02:37,001
I'm actually kind of
tired, though.
60
00:02:37,003 --> 00:02:38,013
[ Groans ]
61
00:02:38,008 --> 00:02:39,018
I think I'm gonna
call it a night.
62
00:02:40,001 --> 00:02:41,011
All right, fine.
63
00:02:41,007 --> 00:02:43,007
But we're finishing this
in the morning.
64
00:02:43,008 --> 00:02:44,018
And here's a little something
65
00:02:44,019 --> 00:02:46,999
in case you need to brush up
on your chess rules.
66
00:02:47,004 --> 00:02:49,014
[ Groans ]
"Chess 101"?
67
00:02:49,010 --> 00:02:50,020
I don't need this.
68
00:02:50,021 --> 00:02:53,021
And best believe I'm gonna
sleep out here tonight --
69
00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:56,000
make sure you don't
try nothing funny.
70
00:02:56,003 --> 00:02:58,023
[ Groans ] Oh, what do you think
I'm gonna do,
71
00:02:58,019 --> 00:03:01,009
swing-line down all 007-style
72
00:03:01,009 --> 00:03:03,009
and paint the pieces
a different color
73
00:03:03,011 --> 00:03:05,011
to make it look
like I'm winning?
74
00:03:05,014 --> 00:03:08,014
-Yes.
-Well, I'm not!
75
00:03:10,013 --> 00:03:12,023
[ Snoring ]
76
00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:17,010
Ah!
What are you doing?!
77
00:03:17,015 --> 00:03:20,995
Huh?!
M-Making a midnight snack!
78
00:03:21,005 --> 00:03:23,005
[ Smack! ]
[ Grunts ]
79
00:03:23,010 --> 00:03:24,020
You were trying to paint
the pieces
80
00:03:24,022 --> 00:03:26,012
to make it look like
you were winning!
81
00:03:26,014 --> 00:03:29,014
You disgust me.
82
00:03:29,007 --> 00:03:31,007
Good thing
I came prepared.
83
00:03:31,013 --> 00:03:34,013
Try getting through
this cheat-proof glass!
84
00:03:34,012 --> 00:03:36,002
[ Yawns ]
85
00:03:36,004 --> 00:03:38,004
Good night!
86
00:03:38,003 --> 00:03:39,023
[ Growls ]
All right.
87
00:03:39,021 --> 00:03:41,021
Gotta think
of another plan.
88
00:03:41,017 --> 00:03:44,007
Uncle G, what are
you doing here?
89
00:03:44,007 --> 00:03:47,007
[ Trance-like voice ]
What are youdoing here?
90
00:03:47,009 --> 00:03:49,009
Playing chess --
what does it look like?
91
00:03:49,008 --> 00:03:51,008
Now, please,
get out of the way!
92
00:03:51,013 --> 00:03:53,023
Get out of the way...
93
00:03:53,023 --> 00:03:56,003
What's gotten
into you, man?
94
00:03:56,003 --> 00:03:58,013
[ Snoring ]
95
00:03:58,009 --> 00:04:00,019
Oh.
Sleepwalking again, huh?
96
00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:02,012
Sleepwalk.
97
00:04:02,016 --> 00:04:05,016
[ Grunts ]
Get off me, bro!
98
00:04:05,017 --> 00:04:06,997
Get...off.
99
00:04:07,004 --> 00:04:09,014
Ah, that's better.
Now, go back to bed.
100
00:04:09,010 --> 00:04:11,010
Go back...to bed.
101
00:04:11,011 --> 00:04:14,011
Whatever you say,
Pizza Steve.
102
00:04:14,016 --> 00:04:15,016
[ Snores ]
103
00:04:15,017 --> 00:04:17,007
Whatever I say, huh?
104
00:04:17,013 --> 00:04:19,023
Uncle G, wait up!
105
00:04:19,017 --> 00:04:22,017
[ Snoring, muttering ]
106
00:04:22,018 --> 00:04:24,008
Uncle G, what are you doing?!
107
00:04:24,011 --> 00:04:26,011
Get up and keep walking!
108
00:04:26,009 --> 00:04:29,999
Get up.
Keep wal-king.
109
00:04:30,004 --> 00:04:31,024
That's it!
You're my pawn,
110
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:35,000
like in a board game that uses
pawns as pieces.
111
00:04:35,006 --> 00:04:37,996
Uncle G,
walk to the kitchen.
112
00:04:38,005 --> 00:04:38,995
[ Snores ]
113
00:04:39,004 --> 00:04:40,024
Walk like chicken.
114
00:04:40,023 --> 00:04:43,023
[ Clucking ]
115
00:04:43,020 --> 00:04:46,010
Walk to the kitchen,
you fool!
116
00:04:46,016 --> 00:04:48,016
Walk to kitchen.
117
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:50,001
[ Snoring ]
118
00:04:50,003 --> 00:04:51,013
Make a sandwich.
119
00:04:51,014 --> 00:04:53,004
Hold on.
120
00:04:53,003 --> 00:04:56,023
Make a "submarine sandwich."
121
00:04:56,021 --> 00:05:00,001
Make "submarine sandwich."
122
00:05:00,006 --> 00:05:01,016
[ Groans ]
123
00:05:01,019 --> 00:05:04,019
Lettuce, tomato...
124
00:05:04,017 --> 00:05:05,997
periscope.
125
00:05:06,005 --> 00:05:09,005
Jalapeño pepper.
126
00:05:09,007 --> 00:05:10,017
[ Laughs ]
127
00:05:11,001 --> 00:05:12,001
[ Sneezes ]
128
00:05:12,002 --> 00:05:14,002
[ Sneezes ]
129
00:05:14,018 --> 00:05:15,998
[ Snoring ]
130
00:05:16,002 --> 00:05:17,012
[ Sighs ]
131
00:05:17,007 --> 00:05:20,007
Man:
And...welcome to Smooth Jazz.
132
00:05:20,010 --> 00:05:23,020
Welcome back
to Smooth Jazz!
133
00:05:23,020 --> 00:05:25,000
No, no, no, no, no, no!
134
00:05:25,005 --> 00:05:26,015
Up next is a classicjazz standard.
135
00:05:26,018 --> 00:05:28,998
[ Scatting ]
136
00:05:29,005 --> 00:05:31,005
Uh, you okay?
137
00:05:31,015 --> 00:05:33,015
Uncle G, cut it out, bro!
138
00:05:33,020 --> 00:05:35,020
Cut it out, bro.
139
00:05:35,022 --> 00:05:37,022
Whoa, all right,
all right.
140
00:05:37,019 --> 00:05:40,009
You were just acting strange,
that's all.
141
00:05:40,012 --> 00:05:42,022
Engage submarine sandwich.
142
00:05:42,018 --> 00:05:45,018
Yeah, submarine sandwich.
143
00:05:48,022 --> 00:05:50,012
[ Sonar beeping ]
144
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,006
[ Rapid beeping ]
145
00:05:52,010 --> 00:05:55,010
Fire jalapeño missiles!
146
00:05:59,008 --> 00:06:06,018
[ Slow-motion ] Noooooo!
147
00:06:12,007 --> 00:06:13,017
[ Buzzer ]
148
00:06:13,017 --> 00:06:14,997
Huh? That's it!
149
00:06:15,004 --> 00:06:17,014
If I can't destroy
the chessboard,
150
00:06:17,014 --> 00:06:19,014
I'm going to have to destroy...
151
00:06:19,014 --> 00:06:22,014
the entire RV!
152
00:06:22,013 --> 00:06:23,023
[ Snoring ]
153
00:06:23,018 --> 00:06:26,008
Walk...to cockpit.
154
00:06:26,014 --> 00:06:28,024
[ Snores ]
155
00:06:28,018 --> 00:06:30,998
That's it.
Now start the RV.
156
00:06:31,005 --> 00:06:32,015
[ Engine starts ]
157
00:06:32,018 --> 00:06:35,008
And turn right
on that bumpy road.
158
00:06:41,004 --> 00:06:42,004
Dah!
159
00:06:42,006 --> 00:06:43,006
[ Rattling ]
160
00:06:43,011 --> 00:06:45,001
Uncle Grandpa,
what are you doing?!
161
00:06:45,004 --> 00:06:46,014
Put the car in park!
162
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:48,014
Put car in park.
163
00:06:48,007 --> 00:06:49,017
[ Tires screech ]
164
00:06:49,020 --> 00:06:52,000
Whoa!
165
00:06:52,003 --> 00:06:54,013
What are you doing?!
Drive, drive!
166
00:06:54,010 --> 00:06:56,000
Drive, drive.
167
00:06:56,003 --> 00:06:57,003
[ Tires squeal ]
168
00:06:57,005 --> 00:07:00,995
Keep driving!
Keep driving!
169
00:07:03,008 --> 00:07:04,008
Whoa!
170
00:07:04,012 --> 00:07:05,022
Stop the RV!
171
00:07:06,001 --> 00:07:08,001
Stop the RV.
172
00:07:08,023 --> 00:07:10,013
Go, go, go!
173
00:07:10,010 --> 00:07:11,020
Uncle Grandpa: Go, go, go.
174
00:07:11,017 --> 00:07:13,017
-No!
-Yes!
175
00:07:13,018 --> 00:07:15,018
-No!
-Yes, yes, yes!
176
00:07:15,020 --> 00:07:18,000
-No, no, no!
-Yes!
177
00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:19,015
[ Snoring ]
178
00:07:19,023 --> 00:07:21,013
Oh, shoot!
179
00:07:21,015 --> 00:07:23,015
Oh, chute.
180
00:07:31,008 --> 00:07:33,018
[ Groans ]
181
00:07:33,022 --> 00:07:35,012
[ Gasps ]
182
00:07:35,013 --> 00:07:38,013
Oh, no!
It's almost tomorrow!
183
00:07:38,007 --> 00:07:41,007
Mr. Gus is going to make me
run around the block naked!
184
00:07:41,012 --> 00:07:45,012
What am I gonna do?!
Think, Pizza Steve, think!
185
00:07:45,014 --> 00:07:47,024
Think, Pizza Steve, think.
186
00:07:47,022 --> 00:07:50,012
Maybe I'm going to have
to read this dumb book.
187
00:07:50,014 --> 00:07:53,014
Ah, curse you,
Chester Masterson!
188
00:07:53,009 --> 00:07:54,999
I wish I could
go back in time
189
00:07:55,002 --> 00:07:56,022
and change the rules
of this book
190
00:07:56,020 --> 00:07:58,020
so that Pizza Steve
is always the winner
191
00:07:58,020 --> 00:08:01,000
no matter what.
192
00:08:01,002 --> 00:08:03,002
This is it --
this is the day
193
00:08:03,002 --> 00:08:07,022
that everyone will find out that
Pizza Steve is a failure --
194
00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:10,009
a failure who can't play chess.
195
00:08:10,008 --> 00:08:12,018
[ Sighs ]
196
00:08:12,020 --> 00:08:14,010
Here it goes.
197
00:08:14,011 --> 00:08:18,011
Well, well! Look who decided
to resume the game.
198
00:08:18,009 --> 00:08:20,999
You better start peeling off
those pepperonis,
199
00:08:21,002 --> 00:08:25,012
because you're about to run
around the block naked!
200
00:08:25,010 --> 00:08:27,010
Let's just get
this over with.
201
00:08:27,012 --> 00:08:29,002
It's your move.
202
00:08:29,004 --> 00:08:31,024
Oh. Right. Uh...
203
00:08:31,021 --> 00:08:33,011
Checkmate!
204
00:08:33,016 --> 00:08:35,006
That's game, Pizza Steve.
205
00:08:35,009 --> 00:08:37,019
Actually, accordingto my calculations,
206
00:08:37,020 --> 00:08:39,020
Pizza Steve is the winner!
207
00:08:39,022 --> 00:08:43,012
What?! [ Laughs ]
208
00:08:46,011 --> 00:08:48,021
Ah, but, seriously,
everybody knows
209
00:08:48,021 --> 00:08:52,011
that the removal of an
opponent's king means a victory.
210
00:08:52,014 --> 00:08:54,024
It says so right here.
211
00:08:57,016 --> 00:08:59,016
Wha?!
212
00:09:03,012 --> 00:09:06,022
I don't know how you got
away with this,
213
00:09:06,020 --> 00:09:08,020
but I am a man of my word.
214
00:09:08,022 --> 00:09:11,002
[ Grunts ]
215
00:09:13,008 --> 00:09:16,018
Hello, everybody!
I'm naked!
216
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:20,022
[ People screaming ]
217
00:09:20,020 --> 00:09:23,020
[ Yawns ]
Mornin', fellas.
218
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:27,010
Pizza Steve, I had the craziest
dream last night.
219
00:09:27,012 --> 00:09:30,022
You were talking in my ear
and bossing me around,
220
00:09:30,023 --> 00:09:34,003
and then you told me to travel
back in time
221
00:09:34,002 --> 00:09:35,022
to rewrite
a book on chess.
222
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,010
Pretty weird, right?
223
00:09:37,012 --> 00:09:39,022
Yeah. Weird!
224
00:09:47,007 --> 00:09:48,017
[ Chomp! ]
225
00:09:48,017 --> 00:09:51,007
[ Laughing ]
226
00:09:51,016 --> 00:09:53,006
Okay, right this way,
Mr. Gus.
227
00:09:53,015 --> 00:09:54,015
You sit right here.
228
00:09:54,023 --> 00:09:56,013
Is this the photo shoot
229
00:09:56,008 --> 00:09:58,018
for next month's issue
of "RV Monthly"?
230
00:09:58,021 --> 00:10:02,021
You betcha, Mr. Gus!
It's gonna be a doozy!
231
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:06,010
How long on hair and makeup for
Giant Realistic Flying Tiger?!
232
00:10:06,014 --> 00:10:08,014
Call time's in three minutes!
233
00:10:08,015 --> 00:10:09,015
Okay.
234
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:12,000
Thanks again for taking the time
to do this, Pizza Steve.
235
00:10:12,003 --> 00:10:13,023
We know you're a busy man.
236
00:10:14,001 --> 00:10:14,021
[ All grunt ]
237
00:10:15,001 --> 00:10:16,001
Who put that cord there?
238
00:10:16,003 --> 00:10:18,013
-I did, sir.
-You're fired!
239
00:10:18,010 --> 00:10:20,020
Right this way,
Giant Realistic Flying Tiger.
240
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:22,010
Watch the cord.
241
00:10:22,007 --> 00:10:24,997
Such beautiful hair,
Giant Realistic Flying Tiger.
242
00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:26,012
Your hair looks great!
243
00:10:26,013 --> 00:10:28,013
Ugh!
244
00:10:28,007 --> 00:10:29,007
Right this way, Belly Bag.
245
00:10:29,014 --> 00:10:31,004
Glass of water
for your troubles?
246
00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:33,005
How long on
Frankenstein's wardrobe?!
247
00:10:33,014 --> 00:10:34,024
Call time's in two!
248
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,010
Did we ship the promo art
to Bangladesh?
249
00:10:37,007 --> 00:10:38,997
Right this way, Tiny Miracle.
250
00:10:39,006 --> 00:10:40,016
We're going live in five!
251
00:10:40,019 --> 00:10:42,009
Right this way,
Frankenstein!
252
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:43,019
-Four, three!
-Hurry!
253
00:10:43,020 --> 00:10:45,000
Get in the picture,
Uncle Grandpa!
254
00:10:45,004 --> 00:10:46,024
-Two!
-Oh, no! Wait for me!
255
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:48,000
-One!
-Oh, no!
256
00:10:48,005 --> 00:10:50,005
[ Camera flashes ]
257
00:10:52,016 --> 00:10:55,006
Nice! [ Giggles ]
258
00:10:55,015 --> 00:11:00,005
Man, we're never gonna get
our picture in "RV Monthly."
259
00:11:00,012 --> 00:11:02,012
[ Roars ]
260
00:11:03,014 --> 00:11:06,004
[ Theme music ]
261
00:11:14,016 --> 00:11:16,996
That was quite delicious.
17178
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