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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,963 --> 00:00:09,962 We'll have to bung the advert in again, Miss Cooling. 2 00:00:09,963 --> 00:00:15,556 I can't understand it, Mr Handy. Not a single reply. 3 00:00:15,557 --> 00:00:18,726 We're supposed to open today. 4 00:00:18,727 --> 00:00:21,395 We'll just have to postpone. 5 00:00:21,396 --> 00:00:26,729 With an enterprise like this, you need people with know-how... 6 00:00:26,730 --> 00:00:31,739 ..who'll do anything for anybody - that's the whole idea. 7 00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:36,327 Never mind, Mr Handy, I'm sure you'll get stuffed. 8 00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:38,476 Eh? Oh, staffed. 9 00:00:53,075 --> 00:00:54,186 Morning. Eh? 10 00:00:54,188 --> 00:00:55,638 I'm saying good morning. Morning. 11 00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:57,848 Nothing interesting? 12 00:00:57,850 --> 00:01:00,513 If there was, I'd be after it. 13 00:01:00,514 --> 00:01:03,271 Are you after a job, Mr Twist? 14 00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:08,562 Why not, Mr Infield-Hopping? I'm not a fixture in this place. 15 00:01:08,563 --> 00:01:10,903 It wasn't built around me. 16 00:01:10,904 --> 00:01:15,533 A Ministry of Labour clerk can get bored of his job. 17 00:01:15,534 --> 00:01:18,578 Watcha. What have you got today? 18 00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:24,750 Nothing, Mr Weston. It's not worth my friend's petrol to bring me here. 19 00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:31,340 A- ha! Bonjour. Guten tag. Buongiorno. Shalom aleichem. 20 00:01:33,969 --> 00:01:39,390 Just demonstrating four of the 16 languages I speak fluently. 21 00:01:39,391 --> 00:01:44,186 There must be a worthwhile appointment for me today. 22 00:01:44,188 --> 00:01:47,231 Please say there is. 23 00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:48,608 Mr Courtenay... Yes? 24 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:51,277 ..there isn't. 25 00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:52,314 Do you mind? 26 00:01:52,315 --> 00:01:54,071 Do you mind? Oh, charming. 27 00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:56,172 You're in a nice mood. 28 00:01:56,173 --> 00:01:59,160 Sorry, but I'm fed up. So am I. 29 00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:02,121 I need an interesting job. Me, too. 30 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:04,889 There are no exciting jobs for women 31 00:02:04,891 --> 00:02:07,585 You're right. It's a man's world. 32 00:02:07,586 --> 00:02:10,880 Someone should do something about it. 33 00:02:10,881 --> 00:02:13,132 I agree. Come on. 34 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,801 No, we can't... 35 00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,720 You can't come in 'ere. 36 00:02:17,721 --> 00:02:21,349 Why not? I can do a man's job. 37 00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:22,803 Me, too. What have you got? 38 00:02:22,804 --> 00:02:24,977 Nothing. 39 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:28,809 Hello, isn't it a lovely morning? Anything on the cards? 40 00:02:28,810 --> 00:02:35,067 Nothing. 41 00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,364 I've never seen him move so fast. 42 00:02:42,365 --> 00:02:44,176 He was reading the paper. 43 00:02:44,177 --> 00:02:46,374 That can only mean... 44 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:49,043 A job. A fascinating job. 45 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:51,087 Just a moment... 46 00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:57,344 Yeah, so fascinating it's not been noted here. 47 00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:18,322 Sam Twist is the name. 48 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,401 Francis Courtenay at your service. 49 00:03:19,403 --> 00:03:21,701 Mike Weston. That's me. 50 00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:23,635 Delia King, Miss. 51 00:03:23,636 --> 00:03:25,456 Dimple. Gaby Dimple. 52 00:03:25,458 --> 00:03:27,682 Lily Duveen, that's me. 53 00:03:27,683 --> 00:03:30,626 Montgomery Infield-Hopping. 54 00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:35,548 Seven - my lucky number. You're all hired. 55 00:03:35,549 --> 00:03:38,349 Come in. Good morning. 56 00:03:38,350 --> 00:03:42,930 Who's responsibulb here? Eh? 57 00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,444 You're Mr Haydn? 58 00:03:44,445 --> 00:03:46,809 How do you do? Yes. 59 00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:52,607 I own this grady far and hadn't had the chance to do the first meeting. 60 00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:53,649 Oh, yes. 61 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:57,028 No, you don't understand my meal. 62 00:03:57,029 --> 00:03:58,946 Certainly, sir. What's the job? 63 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:05,161 There's no job. You don't seem to understand the twenty fido. 64 00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:10,541 Just give all the details of the assignment to Miss Cooling. 65 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:15,338 There's no assignment shall she attain the ten see. 66 00:04:15,339 --> 00:04:19,628 I've come from this monthly grill to meet you... 67 00:04:19,629 --> 00:04:21,969 ..and I take it you're he. 68 00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:25,968 We do undertake anything, yes. Tell Miss Cooling about it. 69 00:04:25,969 --> 00:04:29,018 This is most provoc encouragemold. 70 00:04:29,019 --> 00:04:34,982 I've come as the milk and the human kindly and come to give it to you... 71 00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:38,194 ..flollop me off on your secretrial. 72 00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:41,530 Charmish, but that's not the poil. 73 00:04:41,532 --> 00:04:44,153 I don't think that's too tough, do you, Miss Cooling? 74 00:04:44,154 --> 00:04:48,120 No. No. 75 00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,289 You've got a note of it, then? No. 76 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:54,335 I should think not. I didn't utter a worm. 77 00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:59,298 The age of courtesy and couragemold is finish, I feel. 78 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:04,262 If you want me to conveil my solicitole, I'll serve a writ. 79 00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:09,850 I can be as cold as the next. And crystal cleal. Good morny. 80 00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:16,232 Oh, sorry. Was that a job? What did he want? 81 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:22,446 New set of teeth. This kind of organisation gets swamped with nuts. 82 00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:24,198 And customers, I hope. 83 00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:30,455 But not, at the moment, for you. Girls? 84 00:05:54,897 --> 00:05:57,893 Dead right. How would you like to try on a lady's wardrobe? 85 00:05:57,894 --> 00:06:02,486 Would I? Get cracking, then. 86 00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:08,534 I suppose she won on points. 87 00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:14,624 A lovely idea - an anniversary gift for your wife. Feels so good. 88 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,879 Yes. Doesn't look bad, either. 89 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:25,134 A perfect fit. Thank you, Miss King. 90 00:06:25,135 --> 00:06:31,391 Can't wait to try on the others. 91 00:07:15,227 --> 00:07:18,813 Perfect! A perfect fit! 92 00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:20,940 Thank you very much. 93 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:25,147 It's been a pleasure. What a marvellous surprise for Mrs Belling. 94 00:07:25,148 --> 00:07:27,316 Would you like a coffee? 95 00:07:27,317 --> 00:07:28,651 Oh, thank you. 96 00:07:28,652 --> 00:07:34,908 Perfect! 97 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:47,174 Are you dressed? Does it look like it? 98 00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:50,094 My wife's getting out of a taxi. 99 00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:51,632 I thought she was away today. 100 00:07:51,633 --> 00:07:54,635 So did I. She'll get her surprise early. 101 00:07:54,636 --> 00:07:56,804 She'll get one I didn't plan. 102 00:07:56,805 --> 00:07:58,824 What's that? You. 103 00:07:58,825 --> 00:08:00,396 Oh, me! 104 00:08:00,397 --> 00:08:05,443 Quick, hide. Not in there! You haven't got time to get out. 105 00:08:05,444 --> 00:08:07,690 I'm not dressed for the street. 106 00:08:07,691 --> 00:08:10,585 Precisely. 107 00:08:14,757 --> 00:08:16,663 Can we not explain? 108 00:08:17,873 --> 00:08:20,917 Helen. What are you doing here? 109 00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:27,006 I missed the train. It's not worth going now. 110 00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:33,263 What's this? I know I'm absent-minded, but I'd remember ordering all this. 111 00:08:35,974 --> 00:08:37,850 Did I? 112 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:43,564 No, I did. I wanted you to see them and wear some on our anniversary. 113 00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:49,195 Oh, darling! It's the most staggering gift. 114 00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:51,108 Supppose they don't fit? 115 00:08:51,109 --> 00:08:52,485 I've seen to that. 116 00:08:52,486 --> 00:08:54,325 How? 117 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:55,785 Does it matter? 118 00:08:55,786 --> 00:09:01,582 Poor darling husband, all nervy because I've spoilt his surprise. 119 00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:05,289 Never mind. Stay here and I'll make you a coffee. 120 00:09:05,290 --> 00:09:08,292 It is... HELEN! What are you doing? 121 00:09:08,293 --> 00:09:09,882 I'm putting my coat away. 122 00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,879 You shouldn't have taken it off. 123 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:16,055 Why not? Because... the heating's given out. 124 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:18,260 Darling, are you all right? 125 00:09:18,261 --> 00:09:20,059 Yes, perfectly. 126 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,681 You need something stronger. 127 00:09:22,682 --> 00:09:23,938 Give me that coat. 128 00:09:23,939 --> 00:09:26,644 That's no way to treat clothes. 129 00:09:26,645 --> 00:09:30,027 That old thing? I bought it two months ago. 130 00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:33,406 It's not worth hanging up. 131 00:09:33,407 --> 00:09:39,663 Helen, please, don't open... 132 00:09:41,874 --> 00:09:48,087 I'll let you have the estimate for the new clothes rail. 133 00:09:48,297 --> 00:09:53,092 Morning, ma'am. 134 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:59,286 He came to try on your clothes, but there's nothing between us... 135 00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:05,647 ..because he's really a very nice girl. 136 00:10:13,155 --> 00:10:14,655 Sam, relax. 137 00:10:14,656 --> 00:10:17,909 I'll relax when I get an assignment. 138 00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:19,363 Everyone else is out and about. 139 00:10:19,364 --> 00:10:21,537 They're on routine jobs. 140 00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:24,452 I bet fate has got something exciting in store for you. 141 00:10:24,453 --> 00:10:29,295 It'll be the first time. 142 00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:32,548 Helping Hands? Yes, with pleasure. 143 00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,509 Immediately? Yes. 144 00:10:35,511 --> 00:10:38,888 Right, got it. Thank you. 145 00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:40,447 What did I tell you? 146 00:10:40,448 --> 00:10:41,969 No? Something exciting? 147 00:10:41,970 --> 00:10:48,226 Baby-sitting. 148 00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:06,076 Good evening. I'm from Helping... Hands. 149 00:11:06,078 --> 00:11:12,334 Hello. Come in, do. 150 00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,047 Is this the right place? I mean... 151 00:11:18,048 --> 00:11:21,681 Yes, this is the right place. 152 00:11:21,682 --> 00:11:24,433 Erm... P-P-Panting? 153 00:11:24,434 --> 00:11:27,645 No, that's the way I always breathe. 154 00:11:27,646 --> 00:11:30,731 And your name? 155 00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:33,776 Twist, madam. Sam Twist. 156 00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:40,033 Do sit down. 157 00:11:44,079 --> 00:11:47,206 Yes, well, er... where's the baby? 158 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:53,296 Oh, look. 159 00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:56,048 Oh, delightful. 160 00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:58,217 And so like you, too. 161 00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:01,929 Well, I don't wish to delay you... 162 00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:05,308 ..so just show me where the baby is. 163 00:12:05,309 --> 00:12:09,312 Oh, come here and relax, Mr Twist. 164 00:12:09,313 --> 00:12:14,984 Relax? No, thank you, madam, not while I'm on duty. 165 00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:17,773 Well, madam, where is the baby? 166 00:12:17,774 --> 00:12:20,990 I haven't got a baby. 167 00:12:20,991 --> 00:12:22,736 That's my niece. 168 00:12:22,738 --> 00:12:24,619 Oh. 169 00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:30,750 Sit down. 170 00:12:31,376 --> 00:12:32,668 Er, no, no. 171 00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:36,964 Mr Twist, don't make it difficult for me. 172 00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:39,545 You're making it difficult for me, madam. 173 00:12:39,546 --> 00:12:42,094 I'll explain, Mr Twist. 174 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:47,099 You see, I have deceived you. 175 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:51,395 I don't really need a baby-sitter. 176 00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,267 In that case, I'll just be going... 177 00:12:53,268 --> 00:12:55,352 But I do need a man. 178 00:12:55,353 --> 00:12:56,776 Mrs Panting! 179 00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:59,445 You will help me, won't you? 180 00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:01,066 It depends what you want. 181 00:13:01,068 --> 00:13:02,740 You. 182 00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:05,451 Why me? Ahem. Why me? 183 00:13:05,452 --> 00:13:10,451 It could be any man, but I want to keep it on a professional basis. 184 00:13:10,452 --> 00:13:13,263 I must have a man by eight o'clock. 185 00:13:13,264 --> 00:13:17,421 Well, we only supply helping hands. 186 00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:20,211 Why eight o'clock? That's when he gets home. 187 00:13:20,212 --> 00:13:22,426 Oh, I see, yes, does he? 188 00:13:22,427 --> 00:13:23,511 Who? 189 00:13:23,512 --> 00:13:26,806 Mr Panting. 190 00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:29,642 My husband! 191 00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:33,062 Oh, madam. 192 00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:34,480 He neglects me. 193 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:37,650 I find that difficult to believe. 194 00:13:37,651 --> 00:13:39,313 He ignores me. 195 00:13:39,314 --> 00:13:40,903 It's impossible. 196 00:13:40,904 --> 00:13:43,109 He takes me for granted. 197 00:13:43,110 --> 00:13:45,449 Surely not. 198 00:13:45,450 --> 00:13:51,414 I know he loves me, but I want him to show it more. 199 00:13:51,415 --> 00:13:55,246 Ask him to... Have a little chat with him. 200 00:13:55,247 --> 00:13:57,432 It's no good, I've tried. 201 00:13:57,433 --> 00:13:59,755 No, he needs a lesson. 202 00:13:59,756 --> 00:14:02,717 So do I. I mean, that he does, yes. 203 00:14:02,718 --> 00:14:04,213 I've got to make him jealous. 204 00:14:04,214 --> 00:14:07,138 That's the ticket. He must find me with a man. 205 00:14:07,139 --> 00:14:08,968 You're so right. At eight o'clock. 206 00:14:08,969 --> 00:14:11,183 On the dot. Now do you understand? 207 00:14:11,185 --> 00:14:15,730 Yes, Mrs Panting, I... NO! No, no. 208 00:14:15,731 --> 00:14:17,518 Please, it's nearly eight o'clock. 209 00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:19,270 Stay away from me, dangerous lady. 210 00:14:19,271 --> 00:14:21,611 He'll be here in seconds. 211 00:14:21,612 --> 00:14:25,531 You might as well make it look good. Kiss me. 212 00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,055 Madam! 213 00:14:33,312 --> 00:14:34,666 Kiss me, kiss me, kiss me... 214 00:14:36,335 --> 00:14:39,795 Penny! 215 00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:42,340 Let me go, you beast! 216 00:14:42,341 --> 00:14:45,885 Can I help it if I'm irresistible? 217 00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:51,933 Mr Panting, I can explain. I'm from Helping Hands. Let me go. 218 00:14:52,976 --> 00:14:56,729 My braces. I can explain everything. 219 00:14:56,730 --> 00:15:02,777 Your wife... oh, my braces. It all started with the baby... 220 00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:07,198 Darling. 221 00:15:07,199 --> 00:15:13,455 Did you hurt your hand? 222 00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:23,042 "Attractive man required to model for our..." 223 00:15:23,799 --> 00:15:29,095 Morning. Oh, sorry. It blew off. Oh. 224 00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:37,437 Ahem! 225 00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:47,573 Aye aye. 226 00:15:50,284 --> 00:15:52,571 Yes, madam, right away. 227 00:15:52,572 --> 00:15:55,413 Yes, certainly, thank you. 228 00:15:55,414 --> 00:15:56,596 Job for you. 229 00:15:56,597 --> 00:15:57,707 As a model? 230 00:15:57,708 --> 00:16:00,037 Lady wants someone to walk her pet. 231 00:16:00,038 --> 00:16:02,331 It's a lovely day. Do you good. 232 00:16:02,332 --> 00:16:06,215 Nice address, anyway. 233 00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:10,840 I'm from Helping Hands. I understand you want me to take your pet out. 234 00:16:10,841 --> 00:16:15,057 Oh, yes. I got such an awful cold. 235 00:16:15,058 --> 00:16:18,222 Well, never mind. Where is the little chap? 236 00:16:18,223 --> 00:16:21,314 Here. 237 00:16:21,315 --> 00:16:25,234 Oh, I, really, I... I rather er... 238 00:16:25,235 --> 00:16:27,398 Helping Hands said they can do anything. 239 00:16:27,399 --> 00:16:30,573 And so we will. What's his name? 240 00:16:30,574 --> 00:16:31,652 Yoki. 241 00:16:31,653 --> 00:16:32,658 Yoki. 242 00:16:32,659 --> 00:16:34,447 Don't let him out of your sight. 243 00:16:34,448 --> 00:16:40,704 No. Come on, Yoki. 244 00:16:44,588 --> 00:16:47,215 Which way? This way? That way? 245 00:16:47,216 --> 00:16:51,636 Oh, down here, all right. Come along. 246 00:16:51,637 --> 00:16:55,556 Go for a nice walk, shall we? Walk nicely. 247 00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:58,643 You're not bringing that on here. 248 00:16:58,644 --> 00:17:04,273 But he's tired and the best way to see London is from the top of a bus. 249 00:17:04,274 --> 00:17:07,235 Not this one. Great hairy thing. 250 00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:08,898 I am not! 251 00:17:08,899 --> 00:17:10,488 Hold tight. 252 00:17:10,489 --> 00:17:15,284 I'll report you to the RSPCA. Cheeky monkey! 253 00:17:15,285 --> 00:17:20,915 No offence. The British Transport Commission should hear about this. 254 00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:28,422 Taxi! Taxi! 255 00:17:28,423 --> 00:17:29,715 Can you take us to... 256 00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:32,359 I'll take you, but not your brother. 257 00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:35,179 We've had a long walk. We're tired. 258 00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:38,052 Why not climb in a tree for a kip? 259 00:17:38,053 --> 00:17:40,551 Thank you very much Charming. 260 00:17:40,552 --> 00:17:43,771 Did you hear what he said? 261 00:17:43,772 --> 00:17:46,649 Do you want to go somewhere? 262 00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:52,154 Oh, I see. You want to see your friends. And so you shall. 263 00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:58,412 Just in time for tea. 264 00:18:32,446 --> 00:18:33,821 Morning, Lil. 265 00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:35,943 Morning. Is it worth taking my coat off? 266 00:18:35,944 --> 00:18:38,159 I've got a beaut for you. 267 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,573 Collecting invitation cards and being pleasant. 268 00:18:40,574 --> 00:18:46,830 I say, that'll be nice. 269 00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:03,226 Thank you. 270 00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:06,145 Thank you. 271 00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:07,245 Good morning. 272 00:19:07,246 --> 00:19:08,837 Good morning. 273 00:19:08,838 --> 00:19:10,358 That's everybody. 274 00:19:10,359 --> 00:19:12,271 A nice crowd they are, too. 275 00:19:12,272 --> 00:19:16,113 Yes, very. Can I render any further service? 276 00:19:16,114 --> 00:19:20,696 Just collecting these cards isn't sweated labour. 277 00:19:20,697 --> 00:19:22,382 Please be our guest. 278 00:19:22,383 --> 00:19:26,457 Oh, I say. Thanks. 279 00:19:26,458 --> 00:19:28,329 Are you a lover of the grape, Miss Duveen? 280 00:19:28,330 --> 00:19:30,419 Actually, no. 281 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:36,342 I never know what to do with the pips - flick, collect or spit. 282 00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:40,346 Well, I never... Will you excuse me? 283 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:42,030 Madam, for you? A soupcon? 284 00:19:42,031 --> 00:19:44,394 Really? What kind of soup? 285 00:19:44,395 --> 00:19:46,978 Soup? Madam, there is no soup. 286 00:19:46,979 --> 00:19:48,187 You just said there was. 287 00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:52,316 I asked if you'd care to taste the 1952. 288 00:19:52,317 --> 00:19:57,947 Rather! Such a pretty colour. Like Coca-Cola. Thanks, I'll try it. 289 00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:03,578 Madam, please. Don't unsettle it. 290 00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:06,283 Wow! That's what I call a drink. 291 00:20:06,284 --> 00:20:09,333 I'll have some more. Fill it up. 292 00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:10,821 Fill? To the brim. 293 00:20:10,822 --> 00:20:13,546 Let's have a proper drink. 294 00:20:13,547 --> 00:20:16,877 Madam, you're supposed to taste several wines. 295 00:20:16,878 --> 00:20:22,972 Don't worry, I will. Fill it up. 296 00:20:25,058 --> 00:20:29,312 Not exactly heavy-handed, are you? 297 00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:35,569 Oh, well, here's cream on your salad! 298 00:20:37,946 --> 00:20:44,160 Tickle. 299 00:20:44,369 --> 00:20:50,626 Nice. 300 00:20:58,008 --> 00:21:04,264 By George! 301 00:21:19,238 --> 00:21:20,404 Hello. 302 00:21:20,405 --> 00:21:21,572 Powerful stuff. 303 00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:24,575 I see you had the Nuit-St-Georges. 304 00:21:24,576 --> 00:21:26,238 A dignified wine, don't you think? 305 00:21:26,239 --> 00:21:28,829 Oh, very. 306 00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:33,709 It was a fascinating experience. Have you ever... 307 00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:36,081 What are you doing down there? 308 00:21:36,083 --> 00:21:38,506 Getting up. But I can't. 309 00:21:38,507 --> 00:21:41,133 Come along, young lady. Hup! 310 00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:43,506 No handling, if you please. 311 00:21:43,507 --> 00:21:49,225 But I was only... I know your sort. That'll do. 312 00:21:51,311 --> 00:21:53,563 Bless my soul! 313 00:21:53,564 --> 00:21:59,235 It certainly was powerful stuff. 314 00:22:01,321 --> 00:22:03,447 Marvellous! 315 00:22:03,448 --> 00:22:06,242 Did you see that? Do do it again. 316 00:22:06,243 --> 00:22:12,498 Madam! 317 00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:18,421 Oh, dear. Just shows you. First time must have been beginner's luck. 318 00:22:18,422 --> 00:22:19,792 I really... 319 00:22:19,793 --> 00:22:21,090 I'm so sleepy. 320 00:22:21,091 --> 00:22:22,383 You can't sleep here, madam. 321 00:22:22,384 --> 00:22:25,026 What's going on? I'm dropping off. 322 00:22:25,027 --> 00:22:27,763 Miss Duveen! If my wife were to... 323 00:22:27,764 --> 00:22:31,303 A married man, making advances to me? 324 00:22:31,304 --> 00:22:32,685 I didn't! Chuck him out! 325 00:22:32,686 --> 00:22:37,189 Miss Duveen, please. I keep being insulted at this do. 326 00:22:37,191 --> 00:22:39,103 Miss Duveen, this is not a do. 327 00:22:39,104 --> 00:22:41,068 Don't speak to me like that! 328 00:22:41,069 --> 00:22:42,236 I'm most terribly sorry. 329 00:22:42,237 --> 00:22:45,422 All right, all right, I'm going. 330 00:22:45,423 --> 00:22:49,994 I wouldn't stay here if you paid me. 331 00:22:49,995 --> 00:22:53,331 I can't apologise enough. 332 00:22:53,332 --> 00:22:55,791 Come on, gorgeous. 333 00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:59,170 Hey! Hold up there. 334 00:22:59,171 --> 00:23:04,842 Let's get out of here together, hm? 335 00:23:06,929 --> 00:23:13,185 Disgraceful. A load of drunks. 336 00:23:17,314 --> 00:23:19,482 We've got them all working. 337 00:23:19,483 --> 00:23:25,675 On the day we got our first office flowers. The sign of success. 338 00:23:25,781 --> 00:23:27,026 Isn't it wonderful? 339 00:23:27,027 --> 00:23:32,662 Cigar? No, I don't smoke, thank you. 340 00:23:32,663 --> 00:23:34,997 Come in. 341 00:23:34,998 --> 00:23:36,332 You again. 342 00:23:36,333 --> 00:23:39,288 There's no rights than me to beheed. 343 00:23:39,289 --> 00:23:40,294 Miss Cooling. 344 00:23:40,295 --> 00:23:45,925 Oh, not agrail! It's you I'm going to thalkest to, come what mayload. 345 00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:52,056 Just tell my secretary. Miss Coollie? 346 00:23:52,057 --> 00:23:55,142 Oh, perhaps I willed. 347 00:23:55,143 --> 00:24:01,357 Perhaps this lade shall understand the simply measure I'm to offering. 348 00:24:01,567 --> 00:24:03,270 Have I your attentiahoad, madler? 349 00:24:03,271 --> 00:24:05,570 Lovely day, yes. 350 00:24:05,571 --> 00:24:07,399 I'm not here to discussit the weatheraped. 351 00:24:07,401 --> 00:24:09,991 We should listen together. 352 00:24:09,992 --> 00:24:12,076 You deal with it, Miss Cooling. 353 00:24:12,077 --> 00:24:17,915 There's no understab in your eardroves! Beyond my comprehoad. 354 00:24:17,916 --> 00:24:22,373 You don't understand a syllabulb I'm uttering. 355 00:24:22,374 --> 00:24:24,038 You're from sanitation? 356 00:24:24,039 --> 00:24:25,631 I didn't catch that. 357 00:24:25,632 --> 00:24:26,752 He mentioned the guttering. 358 00:24:26,753 --> 00:24:29,051 I did knockers! 359 00:24:29,052 --> 00:24:30,970 There's nothing wrong with the guttering. 360 00:24:30,971 --> 00:24:35,808 It said which knockers intern or extern rebode. 361 00:24:35,809 --> 00:24:37,513 It's your responsible to sign it flap. 362 00:24:37,514 --> 00:24:40,479 You understand, Miss Cooling. 363 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:41,647 No. 364 00:24:41,648 --> 00:24:46,819 What do you mean, nockers? You think I talk doplo dutchery? 365 00:24:46,820 --> 00:24:48,237 Dutch! 366 00:24:48,238 --> 00:24:49,739 He's Dutch! 367 00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:51,464 We have a man... 368 00:24:51,465 --> 00:24:53,117 A lere leeny... 369 00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:58,748 Don't get excited. This man very clever. He speak 16 language. 370 00:24:58,749 --> 00:25:00,202 You come back... 371 00:25:00,203 --> 00:25:02,752 I am not Dutch! 372 00:25:02,753 --> 00:25:04,629 Look, I'm a very busy man. 373 00:25:04,630 --> 00:25:06,417 Do you think I stand for a loafery? 374 00:25:06,418 --> 00:25:08,925 He wants a chauffeur! 375 00:25:08,926 --> 00:25:11,630 We don't compete with car-hire firms. 376 00:25:11,631 --> 00:25:13,763 I'm gome, but I recoil. 377 00:25:13,764 --> 00:25:18,425 To blaze with all communicail, save the voice and languie 378 00:25:18,426 --> 00:25:20,353 my voice and languie. 379 00:25:20,354 --> 00:25:26,103 This is mobe obsession - to convey the message. I will for doom that. 380 00:25:26,104 --> 00:25:30,733 I don't want your grames, but I'll play to the bitter hobis. 381 00:25:30,734 --> 00:25:31,781 How dare you! 382 00:25:31,782 --> 00:25:36,869 And when I recoil alert and refresh, you shall understab! 383 00:25:36,870 --> 00:25:39,038 And you! 384 00:25:39,039 --> 00:25:41,118 Handy? Who's Handy? 385 00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:43,209 I am. You look it, I must say. 386 00:25:43,210 --> 00:25:45,393 Thank you. Won't you sit down? 387 00:25:45,394 --> 00:25:48,673 No. I'm Amalagamated Scrap Iron. 388 00:25:48,674 --> 00:25:49,960 You must be a millionaire. 389 00:25:49,961 --> 00:25:51,063 Four times over. 390 00:25:51,064 --> 00:25:52,093 Do sit down. 391 00:25:52,094 --> 00:25:54,595 I've already said no! 392 00:25:54,596 --> 00:25:56,947 Do you provide substitutes? 393 00:25:56,948 --> 00:25:59,934 No! This is a respectable firm. 394 00:25:59,935 --> 00:26:02,515 You know the hospital up the road? 395 00:26:02,516 --> 00:26:06,060 Oh, yes. Keep my place for me today. 396 00:26:06,061 --> 00:26:07,942 Eh? Didn't I make myself clear?! 397 00:26:07,943 --> 00:26:11,857 I just don't understand. You're a millionaire. 398 00:26:11,858 --> 00:26:12,905 Four times over. 399 00:26:12,906 --> 00:26:14,902 And you go to an NHS hospital. 400 00:26:14,903 --> 00:26:16,993 It's the principle. 401 00:26:16,994 --> 00:26:23,249 I buy my stamp and have my money's worth. But I've no time to wait. 402 00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:27,879 Got to take over International Screws today. 403 00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:29,922 Will you do it? Yes or no? 404 00:26:29,923 --> 00:26:33,050 I'll put my best operative onto it. 405 00:26:33,051 --> 00:26:38,723 You won't! I want you. The head man, or the deal's off. 406 00:26:38,724 --> 00:26:40,725 Very well. Have a cigar. 407 00:26:40,726 --> 00:26:46,397 Don't smoke 'em. Neither should you. Bad for you. 408 00:26:46,398 --> 00:26:49,400 What a stench. 409 00:26:49,401 --> 00:26:55,657 Have a flower to get rid of it. 410 00:26:57,951 --> 00:27:00,661 Good morning, Doctor, Sister. 411 00:27:00,662 --> 00:27:05,035 When Sir Theodore arrives, telephone me at once. 412 00:27:05,036 --> 00:27:06,751 Yes, Matron. 413 00:27:06,752 --> 00:27:11,417 This is a vital inspection. What he says goes. Clear? 414 00:27:11,418 --> 00:27:14,842 Yes, but how do I recognise him? 415 00:27:14,843 --> 00:27:20,681 He's not exactly handsome, but I'm told he has a rugged grandeur... 416 00:27:20,682 --> 00:27:24,894 ..and he wears a flower in his buttonhole. 417 00:27:24,895 --> 00:27:30,858 Yes, Matron. 418 00:27:31,902 --> 00:27:35,196 Doctor? 419 00:27:35,197 --> 00:27:37,782 Doctor, he's here. 420 00:27:37,783 --> 00:27:38,783 No! 421 00:27:38,784 --> 00:27:43,579 I'll phone Matron. 422 00:27:43,580 --> 00:27:45,623 Hello, sir. Hello. 423 00:27:45,624 --> 00:27:47,411 This is an unexpected honour. 424 00:27:47,412 --> 00:27:48,876 Is it? 425 00:27:48,877 --> 00:27:51,462 Of course. That's nice of you. 426 00:27:51,463 --> 00:27:54,835 Would you like to wait in the examination room? 427 00:27:54,836 --> 00:27:57,468 Yes, I don't mind. Thank you. 428 00:27:57,469 --> 00:28:02,181 Nice people. 429 00:28:02,182 --> 00:28:03,516 Good morning. Hello. 430 00:28:03,517 --> 00:28:05,721 First patient, Sister. 431 00:28:05,722 --> 00:28:09,063 Yes, Doctor. 432 00:28:09,064 --> 00:28:13,693 Good morning. Welcome. We feel most honoured. 433 00:28:13,694 --> 00:28:14,986 How do you do? 434 00:28:14,987 --> 00:28:18,859 Would you please follow me, Sir Theodore? 435 00:28:18,860 --> 00:28:23,619 Sir Theodore? 436 00:28:25,706 --> 00:28:27,368 Morning, matron. Morning, sir. 437 00:28:27,369 --> 00:28:31,540 Morning, sister. 438 00:28:35,841 --> 00:28:41,345 Watch closely. This is the world's most inspired diagnostician. 439 00:28:43,432 --> 00:28:48,556 He must be to learn about a varicose vein by studying the scalp. 440 00:28:48,557 --> 00:28:52,148 Watch, listen, learn. 441 00:28:52,149 --> 00:28:53,691 Never. 442 00:28:53,692 --> 00:28:54,942 What do you mean, never? 443 00:28:54,943 --> 00:28:57,377 That track, in the mud - never. 444 00:28:57,378 --> 00:29:00,095 I've been following that horse. 445 00:29:00,096 --> 00:29:04,368 But other horses never follow him. 446 00:29:04,369 --> 00:29:08,956 Don't put me off. I'm doing you a favour. That's a cow. 447 00:29:08,957 --> 00:29:12,084 Mind your own business. OK. 448 00:29:12,085 --> 00:29:17,381 It's his funeral. 449 00:29:17,382 --> 00:29:22,178 Nurse, side ward. 450 00:29:22,179 --> 00:29:23,304 Oh, I'm sorry. Nurse! 451 00:29:23,305 --> 00:29:25,431 I'm sorry, sister. 452 00:29:25,432 --> 00:29:29,518 That's too heavy a load for you. Don't stand there, give her a hand! 453 00:29:33,690 --> 00:29:38,527 Let me help you, nurse. 454 00:29:38,529 --> 00:29:39,820 Hey, what the hell...! 455 00:29:39,821 --> 00:29:43,157 Cheer up, chicken. It's all right. 456 00:29:43,158 --> 00:29:48,829 Where would we be if we didn't help each other? Let's see some more. 457 00:29:50,916 --> 00:29:54,919 All great men are slightly eccentric. 458 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:56,686 Yes, Matron. 459 00:29:56,687 --> 00:30:00,508 Yes, Matron. 460 00:30:00,509 --> 00:30:04,011 All right, Nurse. 461 00:30:08,183 --> 00:30:11,727 Goochy-goochy! Wibble-wibble! 462 00:30:11,728 --> 00:30:14,272 Little baskets! 463 00:30:14,273 --> 00:30:17,019 I mean, what little baskets you keep them in. 464 00:30:17,020 --> 00:30:19,485 Oh, yes. 465 00:30:19,486 --> 00:30:20,528 I love kids. 466 00:30:20,529 --> 00:30:22,947 Have you any of your own? 467 00:30:22,948 --> 00:30:26,576 I can't say I have, I can't say I haven't. 468 00:30:26,577 --> 00:30:30,658 I always say that brilliant men are absent-minded. 469 00:30:30,659 --> 00:30:31,701 Yeah. 470 00:30:41,967 --> 00:30:47,972 We give our nurses a regular checkup. 471 00:30:47,973 --> 00:30:51,220 Is there anything else we can show you? 472 00:30:51,221 --> 00:30:53,306 I think I'll rest here awhile. 473 00:30:59,902 --> 00:31:01,665 You're late. Where is he? 474 00:31:01,666 --> 00:31:04,692 Where's who? The man keeping my place. 475 00:31:04,693 --> 00:31:05,698 What man? 476 00:31:05,699 --> 00:31:09,201 He had a face like a relief map. 477 00:31:09,203 --> 00:31:11,370 And a flower? 478 00:31:11,371 --> 00:31:14,499 Yes, he had a flower. He's from Helping Hands. Where is he? 479 00:31:21,089 --> 00:31:22,564 Ward 10. 480 00:31:22,565 --> 00:31:24,133 Emergency. 481 00:31:24,134 --> 00:31:27,345 Yes, Sister. 482 00:31:27,346 --> 00:31:29,008 Nurse. What is it? 483 00:31:29,009 --> 00:31:30,223 It isn't. Isn't what? 484 00:31:30,224 --> 00:31:31,886 He isn't. That man. 485 00:31:31,887 --> 00:31:33,476 Which man isn't what? 486 00:31:33,477 --> 00:31:35,681 The man with Matron isn't Sir Theodore. 487 00:31:35,682 --> 00:31:40,691 Goodness gracious! 488 00:31:40,692 --> 00:31:44,315 Matron, that man's not Sir Theodore. He's an imposter. 489 00:31:44,316 --> 00:31:45,358 What?! 490 00:31:59,586 --> 00:32:00,998 You're not Sir Theodore. 491 00:32:00,999 --> 00:32:02,768 I never said I was. 492 00:32:02,769 --> 00:32:04,465 Leave this instant. 493 00:32:04,466 --> 00:32:06,552 Some other time, eh? When you need a helping hand. Tell your friends. 494 00:32:18,564 --> 00:32:20,768 That's definitely my best side. 495 00:32:20,769 --> 00:32:22,662 For what, Mr Courtenay? 496 00:32:22,663 --> 00:32:24,485 Nothing, I was just... 497 00:32:24,486 --> 00:32:28,651 Hoping the photography job might go your way? 498 00:32:28,652 --> 00:32:30,324 What photography job? 499 00:32:30,325 --> 00:32:33,218 Would you like me to pencil you in? 500 00:32:33,219 --> 00:32:36,038 Yes. I photographed well as a child. 501 00:32:36,039 --> 00:32:40,960 My relatives treasure portraits of me. I was curly. 502 00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:42,665 You weren't! 503 00:32:42,666 --> 00:32:44,922 Yes! 504 00:32:44,923 --> 00:32:47,800 How lovely you must have been. 505 00:32:47,801 --> 00:32:53,598 Suggest me for it. I'd like to know how I'd photograph in my maturity. 506 00:32:53,599 --> 00:32:56,470 I haven't been done professionally for ages. 507 00:32:56,471 --> 00:32:58,389 Leave it to me. 508 00:32:58,390 --> 00:33:04,442 Thank you. 509 00:33:04,443 --> 00:33:07,737 Good morning, gentlemen. 510 00:33:07,738 --> 00:33:10,239 I'm your model. 511 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:13,367 Can't believe it, eh? I understand. 512 00:33:13,368 --> 00:33:16,682 There's no point being modest 513 00:33:16,683 --> 00:33:21,710 - I have the perfect face for photography. 514 00:33:23,670 --> 00:33:28,461 We're very grateful. None of the top models would do it... 515 00:33:28,462 --> 00:33:30,635 Sorry. Would do, I mean. 516 00:33:30,636 --> 00:33:34,680 Some of us have got it and some of us haven't. 517 00:33:34,681 --> 00:33:37,016 You've got it, all right. 518 00:33:37,017 --> 00:33:42,266 Soon thousands of poster hoardings will have it, too - my face. 519 00:33:42,267 --> 00:33:43,476 Won't you sit down? 520 00:33:43,477 --> 00:33:46,484 Thank you. 521 00:33:46,485 --> 00:33:49,106 Well, gentlemen, ready when you are. 522 00:33:49,107 --> 00:33:51,739 Let's go. 523 00:33:51,740 --> 00:33:55,196 Take your time. I'm difficult to light, I know. 524 00:33:55,197 --> 00:33:57,328 You're lit. 525 00:33:57,329 --> 00:34:00,498 Oh, you know your job, I must say. 526 00:34:00,499 --> 00:34:04,288 What's the product we're selling? I mean... 527 00:34:04,289 --> 00:34:05,332 Keep quite still. 528 00:34:44,334 --> 00:34:46,247 Good morning, Sam. 529 00:34:46,248 --> 00:34:48,671 Good morning, you say? 530 00:34:48,672 --> 00:34:51,424 Look at that - you're late. 531 00:34:51,425 --> 00:34:53,984 Only a minute. No-one else is in. 532 00:34:53,985 --> 00:34:56,470 "Only a minute" she says. Charming. 533 00:34:56,471 --> 00:35:01,934 What if Caesar had only been a minute for the Spanish Armada...? 534 00:35:01,935 --> 00:35:04,849 I don't know what I'm talking about. 535 00:35:04,850 --> 00:35:07,481 Sam, are you in trouble? 536 00:35:07,482 --> 00:35:09,025 The worst. 537 00:35:09,026 --> 00:35:13,154 What's her name? Oh, please, it's worse than that. 538 00:35:13,155 --> 00:35:19,410 Tell me about it and your worries will disappear like a puff of smoke. 539 00:35:19,620 --> 00:35:24,368 If you've got a hangover, it must be a corker. Take my tip... 540 00:35:24,369 --> 00:35:28,252 Corker, tip... 541 00:35:28,253 --> 00:35:31,672 Sam, what on earth is the matter? 542 00:35:31,673 --> 00:35:34,967 I want it. 543 00:35:34,968 --> 00:35:38,632 No! Cigarette, damn it. 544 00:35:38,633 --> 00:35:40,339 Well, have one. 545 00:35:40,340 --> 00:35:42,225 I've given it up. 546 00:35:42,226 --> 00:35:43,554 Then don't have one. 547 00:35:43,555 --> 00:35:46,687 I want one. Make up your mind! 548 00:35:46,688 --> 00:35:49,607 I have - to give it up. 549 00:35:49,608 --> 00:35:51,729 Well, there's an end to it. 550 00:35:51,730 --> 00:35:52,860 But I want one. 551 00:35:52,861 --> 00:35:56,530 How long have you been like this? 552 00:35:56,532 --> 00:35:59,945 Since yesterday lunch time, really. This is hell! 553 00:35:59,946 --> 00:36:03,365 I've got the answer - a sweet. 554 00:36:03,366 --> 00:36:05,248 A sweet. 555 00:36:05,249 --> 00:36:07,750 They'll make you fat. 556 00:36:07,751 --> 00:36:12,171 I couldn't stand inactivity without a sweet. 557 00:36:12,172 --> 00:36:14,168 Self-indulgency. No willpower. 558 00:36:14,169 --> 00:36:15,508 Look who's talking! 559 00:36:15,509 --> 00:36:17,593 I can talk if I want to. 560 00:36:17,594 --> 00:36:20,341 I've been without it for 24 hours. 561 00:36:20,342 --> 00:36:21,568 Without what? 562 00:36:21,569 --> 00:36:22,723 A cigarette. 563 00:36:22,724 --> 00:36:24,804 You made me say that! 564 00:36:24,805 --> 00:36:26,969 Oh, look at my sweets! 565 00:36:26,970 --> 00:36:29,438 Trying to make me say it. 566 00:36:29,439 --> 00:36:33,317 Sorry, darling. Smoke... Smoke, see? 567 00:36:33,318 --> 00:36:35,444 Can't do without it. 568 00:36:35,445 --> 00:36:39,616 I must have a smoke! I must! I must! I must! 569 00:37:11,982 --> 00:37:13,644 Better now? 570 00:37:13,645 --> 00:37:15,484 Oh, yeah. 571 00:37:15,485 --> 00:37:19,656 Sir Walter Raleigh certainly earned his knighthood. 572 00:37:24,203 --> 00:37:30,416 Isn't that strange? Just a few puffs of that. 573 00:37:30,626 --> 00:37:34,796 Oh, it makes the whole world look sort of all... most peculiar. 574 00:37:40,844 --> 00:37:43,137 Sam! 575 00:37:43,138 --> 00:37:46,432 Sam! 576 00:37:46,433 --> 00:37:49,393 It'll pass away. 577 00:37:49,394 --> 00:37:51,312 So will you by the look of you. 578 00:37:51,313 --> 00:37:56,859 Don't worry. It's like this when you start smoking again after a lay-off. 579 00:37:58,946 --> 00:38:03,574 Can you... Can you get up? 580 00:38:03,575 --> 00:38:05,368 Cigarette. Sam, no. 581 00:38:05,369 --> 00:38:07,620 Please, Lil. Cigarette. 582 00:38:07,621 --> 00:38:10,034 No, you are going to give it up. 583 00:38:10,035 --> 00:38:12,333 I can't give it up, Lil. 584 00:38:12,334 --> 00:38:17,625 I've tried six times and always end up like this. I'm a slave to them. 585 00:38:17,626 --> 00:38:21,092 Six times. It's disgraceful. 586 00:38:21,093 --> 00:38:23,631 This time you are going through with it. 587 00:38:23,632 --> 00:38:26,055 No. I can't. 588 00:38:26,056 --> 00:38:30,351 Yes, you can. All you need is a helping hand. 589 00:38:30,352 --> 00:38:35,815 A helping hand who needs a helping hand! I'm going to help you. 590 00:38:35,816 --> 00:38:41,649 How? I won't have a single sweet, you won't have a single draw. 591 00:38:41,650 --> 00:38:44,282 We'll both do without. 592 00:38:44,283 --> 00:38:46,320 No sweets. 593 00:38:46,321 --> 00:38:47,364 No draws! 594 00:38:55,419 --> 00:38:58,796 Weiss du, was du bist? 595 00:38:58,797 --> 00:39:03,092 Du bist ein ganz ekelhafter, lumpiger Kerl! 596 00:39:03,093 --> 00:39:04,088 Ich hab' die Nase voll von dir. 597 00:39:04,089 --> 00:39:06,137 Excuse me a minute. 598 00:39:06,138 --> 00:39:08,717 Wer immer das mag sein, mach ihn weg. 599 00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:12,643 Just a moment, dear. 600 00:39:12,644 --> 00:39:15,605 Mr Trellorny? I'm from Help... 601 00:39:15,606 --> 00:39:18,316 Yes, yes, I know. Come in. 602 00:39:18,317 --> 00:39:19,687 You can start work at once. 603 00:39:19,688 --> 00:39:22,904 Thank you. 604 00:39:22,905 --> 00:39:27,283 My dear, would you repeat what you said just now? 605 00:39:27,284 --> 00:39:32,366 Ich glaub', du hast mich sehr gut verstanden. Raus mit ihm! 606 00:39:32,367 --> 00:39:34,761 The lady wishes me to leave, sir. 607 00:39:34,762 --> 00:39:37,335 I'm paying you and I say you stay. 608 00:39:37,336 --> 00:39:42,710 Schick den verdammten Trottel fort! 609 00:39:42,711 --> 00:39:44,250 Good gracious me! 610 00:39:44,251 --> 00:39:45,755 What's she saying? 611 00:39:45,756 --> 00:39:48,632 Eh? You're meant to listen. Translate. 612 00:39:48,633 --> 00:39:51,140 No, not in front of a lady. 613 00:39:51,141 --> 00:39:54,936 Idiotisches Rindvieh, Sie! 614 00:39:54,937 --> 00:39:56,312 Oh, I say! 615 00:39:56,313 --> 00:39:58,309 I don't care what you say. What did she say? 616 00:39:58,310 --> 00:40:01,734 No, I couldn't. Oh, no. 617 00:40:01,735 --> 00:40:02,944 Trevor... 618 00:40:02,945 --> 00:40:05,613 Ah, that's better. Trevor. 619 00:40:05,614 --> 00:40:10,696 My name's the same in any language. What are we arguing about? 620 00:40:10,697 --> 00:40:12,411 Ha! Ha! 621 00:40:12,412 --> 00:40:14,956 Would you elaborate? 622 00:40:14,957 --> 00:40:20,711 Wenn er nicht vor der Tur sitzt, dann ist weg mit deinem Kopf! 623 00:40:20,712 --> 00:40:24,251 If I can't leave immediately, there's to be a physical assault... 624 00:40:24,252 --> 00:40:26,968 Stand your ground. 625 00:40:26,969 --> 00:40:29,804 On you! If you'd let me finish. 626 00:40:29,805 --> 00:40:33,516 Da du einen Dolmetscher hier gestellt hast... 627 00:40:33,517 --> 00:40:39,605 As you have an interpreter here, you needn't be ignorant... 628 00:40:40,023 --> 00:40:43,609 ..of my sorrow and anger. 629 00:40:43,610 --> 00:40:44,610 Es ist dies - It is this - 630 00:40:44,611 --> 00:40:46,988 Even I can get that. 631 00:40:46,989 --> 00:40:50,194 ..wenn eine Frau eine neue Frisur hat und einen neuen Hut... 632 00:40:50,195 --> 00:40:54,287 When a wife has a new hairstyle and new hat... 633 00:40:54,288 --> 00:40:56,492 ..erwartet sie, dass ihr Mann davon Notiz nimmt! 634 00:40:56,493 --> 00:40:58,541 ..she wants it noted. 635 00:40:58,542 --> 00:41:00,001 Und wenn er das nicht tut... 636 00:41:00,002 --> 00:41:04,458 When it is not so, that can only mean one thing. 637 00:41:04,459 --> 00:41:05,501 ..dass seine Interessen woanders liegt. 638 00:41:05,502 --> 00:41:08,092 His interest is elsewhere. 639 00:41:08,093 --> 00:41:12,425 Wahrscheinlich bei seiner neuen Schlampe von einer Stenotypistin! 640 00:41:12,426 --> 00:41:16,559 Probably with his trollop secretary. 641 00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:18,681 Is that all? 642 00:41:18,682 --> 00:41:20,229 Alles?! All?! 643 00:41:20,230 --> 00:41:22,565 You silly girl! 644 00:41:22,566 --> 00:41:25,062 Wagst du es, mich ein dummes Madel zu nennen? 645 00:41:25,063 --> 00:41:27,314 Don't call me a silly girl. 646 00:41:27,315 --> 00:41:28,696 Oh, but you are. 647 00:41:28,697 --> 00:41:33,951 Ich bin es nicht! Ich bin eine tief leidenschaftliche Frau. 648 00:41:36,038 --> 00:41:39,832 I'm not. I'm a deeply passionate woman. 649 00:41:39,833 --> 00:41:41,459 Oh, I know, I know. 650 00:41:41,460 --> 00:41:43,622 Du behandelst mich aber nicht als eine Solche. 651 00:41:43,623 --> 00:41:46,459 You don't behave as if I was one. 652 00:41:46,460 --> 00:41:48,549 How can you say that? 653 00:41:48,550 --> 00:41:54,680 Fur eine ganze Woche hast du mir kein Zeichen deiner Liebe gegeben. 654 00:41:54,890 --> 00:41:58,804 For a week, you've shown no love towards me. 655 00:41:58,805 --> 00:42:00,519 I was too tired. 656 00:42:00,521 --> 00:42:03,184 Ja, gewiss - meiner Mude! 657 00:42:03,185 --> 00:42:04,640 Yes, tired of me. 658 00:42:04,641 --> 00:42:06,025 No, no, darling. 659 00:42:06,026 --> 00:42:09,320 Es ist alles die Sekretarin. 660 00:42:09,321 --> 00:42:10,364 It's that stenographer. 661 00:42:18,372 --> 00:42:20,206 There's no need to be so convincing. 662 00:42:20,207 --> 00:42:24,502 I can't help it. I think your wife's got a point. 663 00:42:24,503 --> 00:42:28,130 You're here to translate, not judge. 664 00:42:28,131 --> 00:42:30,841 Do you come from a broken home? 665 00:42:30,843 --> 00:42:32,802 As a matter of fact, I don't. 666 00:42:32,803 --> 00:42:37,515 Well, I do. I beg of you, think of your children. 667 00:42:37,516 --> 00:42:39,267 Ja, aber horen Sie! 668 00:42:39,268 --> 00:42:40,518 We haven't got any children. 669 00:42:40,519 --> 00:42:45,314 You won't have, like this. You tired, you with your hats. 670 00:42:45,315 --> 00:42:47,401 You should be ashamed of yourselves. 671 00:42:55,993 --> 00:42:59,412 Please... don't upset yourself. 672 00:42:59,413 --> 00:43:02,415 I can't help it. 673 00:43:02,416 --> 00:43:06,210 You're back in English. Does that mean... 674 00:43:06,211 --> 00:43:11,877 It means our trivialities are nothing compared to the turmoil... 675 00:43:11,878 --> 00:43:15,845 ..of this delicate and wounded soul. 676 00:43:15,846 --> 00:43:20,433 Make up, you two. That's the only thing to help me. 677 00:43:20,434 --> 00:43:26,439 If only for my sake, make up. 678 00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,317 All right, then. All right. 679 00:43:29,318 --> 00:43:33,175 Yes. Yes, nice. 680 00:43:33,176 --> 00:43:34,342 Seconds out. 681 00:43:34,344 --> 00:43:37,846 Lofty Benson! Cor blimey! 682 00:43:37,847 --> 00:43:43,138 Bert Handy. A little older, but I'd recognise that ugly mug anywhere. 683 00:43:43,139 --> 00:43:46,146 You helped make it like this! 684 00:43:46,147 --> 00:43:47,230 Let's sit down and have a natter. 685 00:43:47,231 --> 00:43:53,028 This is business, can't stop. I need a couple of seconds tonight. 686 00:43:53,029 --> 00:43:54,321 You're not going back in the ring? 687 00:43:54,322 --> 00:44:00,577 Only the corner. I'm in management. My fighter's Dynamite Dan Grimsby. 688 00:44:00,787 --> 00:44:04,618 Never heard of him. You will after his fight tonight. 689 00:44:04,619 --> 00:44:06,374 Who's he fighting? Mickey McGee. 690 00:44:06,376 --> 00:44:07,912 Massive Mickey? Are you punchy? 691 00:44:07,914 --> 00:44:10,170 My kid's dynamite. 692 00:44:10,171 --> 00:44:13,590 I'll come myself tonight, gee him on. 693 00:44:13,591 --> 00:44:16,171 Will you? And the seconds are on the house. 694 00:44:16,172 --> 00:44:18,257 Good old Bert! 695 00:44:33,319 --> 00:44:35,612 Hulking great brute! And such a show-off! 696 00:44:39,784 --> 00:44:42,744 Bit nervy. There, not to worry. 697 00:44:42,745 --> 00:44:45,914 Just one big whack in his fat belly. 698 00:44:45,915 --> 00:44:48,787 That'll knock the wind out of him. 699 00:44:48,788 --> 00:44:50,377 Who? Me? 700 00:44:50,378 --> 00:44:52,463 I give the advice around here. Massage his back. 701 00:45:03,641 --> 00:45:06,017 Aargh! Oooh! 702 00:45:06,019 --> 00:45:08,619 So sorry. I do beg your pardon. 703 00:45:08,620 --> 00:45:12,065 Owww! He's hurt my finger. Owww! 704 00:45:12,066 --> 00:45:14,568 Get this one off, too. 705 00:45:14,569 --> 00:45:16,611 Oooooh! 706 00:45:16,612 --> 00:45:18,029 You'll be all right, son. 707 00:45:18,031 --> 00:45:22,070 It's a right horrible sprain. I can't fight. 708 00:45:22,071 --> 00:45:23,076 You've got to. 709 00:45:23,077 --> 00:45:27,247 With one hand? How can you be so inhuman? 710 00:45:27,248 --> 00:45:29,577 Shut up! Listen, Dan, Dan... 711 00:45:29,579 --> 00:45:32,085 ..is a very hurt man. 712 00:45:32,086 --> 00:45:35,589 Ready, champ? 713 00:45:35,590 --> 00:45:36,631 Ready? 714 00:45:36,632 --> 00:45:38,420 No, not tonight. 715 00:45:38,421 --> 00:45:41,178 Eh? 716 00:45:41,179 --> 00:45:46,433 He's only sprained his little finger. 717 00:45:46,434 --> 00:45:51,104 Ladies and gentlemen, your attention, please. 718 00:45:51,105 --> 00:45:54,635 Dynamite Dan Grimsby is forced to 719 00:45:54,636 --> 00:45:59,447 withdraw owing to a sprained little finger. 720 00:46:00,573 --> 00:46:05,619 In place of the main bout... 721 00:46:05,620 --> 00:46:08,997 Oh, you unsympathetic lump! 722 00:46:08,998 --> 00:46:11,348 Why doesn't somebody punch him? 723 00:46:11,349 --> 00:46:13,435 Why don't you? It's your fault. 724 00:46:26,015 --> 00:46:28,517 Gabe! 725 00:46:28,518 --> 00:46:33,939 Come here, Gabe. 726 00:46:33,940 --> 00:46:37,943 Hey, you. Come on back and fight. 727 00:46:37,944 --> 00:46:43,031 What are you waiting for? Do I have to strike the first blow? 728 00:46:43,032 --> 00:46:51,374 Very well, then, don't say I didn't warn you. 729 00:46:51,833 --> 00:47:00,174 Oh, no, I'm not ready. 730 00:47:05,221 --> 00:47:13,563 Hey, ref! He can't hit him, he's got his glasses on! 731 00:47:30,913 --> 00:47:39,255 Come on, Gabe! Get at him! 732 00:47:44,635 --> 00:47:47,512 Run, Gabe! Run! 733 00:47:47,513 --> 00:47:52,392 Faster! 734 00:47:52,393 --> 00:48:00,735 Get out! Jump out! 735 00:48:06,574 --> 00:48:10,368 He's coming, Gabe! 736 00:48:10,370 --> 00:48:16,625 He's got him! 737 00:48:16,626 --> 00:48:24,967 Well done, Gabe! 738 00:48:31,849 --> 00:48:34,851 Yes? 739 00:48:34,852 --> 00:48:39,398 I see. How very disappointing. 740 00:48:39,399 --> 00:48:43,819 I shall have to make alternative arrangements. 741 00:48:43,820 --> 00:48:52,161 Take care. Goodbye. 742 00:49:00,795 --> 00:49:04,172 Helping Hands Ltd. 743 00:49:04,173 --> 00:49:08,838 I beg your pardon? I'm sorry, sir, I can't understand... 744 00:49:08,839 --> 00:49:11,596 Oh! Too loud now. 745 00:49:11,597 --> 00:49:14,975 I still can't understand. 746 00:49:14,976 --> 00:49:18,437 Now, sir, what was it you wanted? 747 00:49:18,438 --> 00:49:21,898 Yes... yes... 748 00:49:21,899 --> 00:49:24,568 The what?! Are you sure? 749 00:49:24,569 --> 00:49:30,323 Well, I'm sorry, but I find it difficult to understand you. 750 00:49:30,324 --> 00:49:33,697 Yes, of course I've got a note of it. 751 00:49:33,698 --> 00:49:36,663 Forth Bridge, rest assured. 752 00:49:36,664 --> 00:49:44,171 Goodbye. 753 00:49:44,172 --> 00:49:47,257 Oh, I wish I'd turned it down. 754 00:49:47,258 --> 00:49:51,636 I'm glad you didn't. I mean, this to me is... it... 755 00:49:51,637 --> 00:49:58,185 ..it's adventure. It's like - what's it called? - "The 39 Steps". 756 00:49:58,186 --> 00:50:04,357 Oh, I didn't hear him very well. It's all so indefinite. 757 00:50:04,359 --> 00:50:10,906 But these things usually are. The agent cool, alert and debonair. 758 00:50:10,907 --> 00:50:17,954 He's only ever given a rendezvous; he receives his instructions there. 759 00:50:17,955 --> 00:50:21,792 I might even be contacted on the train. 760 00:50:21,793 --> 00:50:28,507 Ah, Scotland - lot of hydroelectric stuff up there. 761 00:50:28,508 --> 00:50:32,589 Bet this has something to do with atomic energy. 762 00:50:32,590 --> 00:50:36,598 Gracious, I hope you don't end up in Russia! 763 00:50:36,599 --> 00:50:41,890 If I do, I shall behave as an ex-corporal of the Pioneers should. 764 00:50:41,891 --> 00:50:45,435 Name, rank and number, and hands off my shovel. 765 00:50:45,436 --> 00:50:48,944 Don't go! Think of brainwashing! 766 00:50:48,945 --> 00:50:52,531 How can they wash what isn't there? 767 00:50:52,532 --> 00:50:57,911 Er, by that I mean I don't know anything. Yet. 768 00:50:57,912 --> 00:51:06,254 Excuse me, Miss Cooling, my train. 769 00:51:06,295 --> 00:51:09,042 Well, au revoir, Miss Cooling. 770 00:51:09,043 --> 00:51:11,675 Or maybe goodbye. 771 00:51:11,676 --> 00:51:20,018 Oh, dear! 772 00:51:37,785 --> 00:51:40,704 Going all the way? 773 00:51:40,705 --> 00:51:42,080 Uh-huh. 774 00:51:42,081 --> 00:51:49,963 That's our man, then. 775 00:51:49,964 --> 00:51:58,306 Oh! 776 00:52:38,262 --> 00:52:40,263 Thank you. 777 00:52:40,264 --> 00:52:43,392 You're not English. 778 00:52:43,393 --> 00:52:46,812 And you're not Chinese - so what? 779 00:52:46,813 --> 00:52:51,900 So this - we might be on the same journey. 780 00:52:51,901 --> 00:53:00,243 Of course we are. 781 00:53:25,268 --> 00:53:27,561 OK, I'm persevering. 782 00:53:27,562 --> 00:53:29,646 I don't like it. 783 00:53:29,647 --> 00:53:32,435 Quit the pretence, I'm your man. 784 00:53:32,436 --> 00:53:33,859 What?! 785 00:53:33,860 --> 00:53:39,656 I'm glad we met. I wasn't looking forward to jumping off the train. 786 00:53:39,657 --> 00:53:44,411 Huh?! But if you say we jump, then we jump. 787 00:53:44,412 --> 00:53:52,754 Can we talk this over somewhere less public? 788 00:53:53,254 --> 00:54:01,596 Sorry, mate. Ugh, brown Windsor! Ugh! 789 00:54:05,391 --> 00:54:08,784 ' This is it. Here's the bridge.' 790 00:54:08,785 --> 00:54:12,355 'Listen, you've got to jump out.' 791 00:54:12,357 --> 00:54:17,277 There's not going to be any contact on the train.' 792 00:54:17,278 --> 00:54:21,192 'When you jump, let every muscle go slack.' 793 00:54:21,193 --> 00:54:23,408 'NOT NOW, STUPID!' 794 00:54:23,409 --> 00:54:26,620 'When you jump.' 795 00:54:26,621 --> 00:54:32,725 'You're not nervous now, are you?' 796 00:54:32,726 --> 00:54:35,879 No! 797 00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:39,194 'OK, kid, near the bridge now 798 00:54:39,195 --> 00:54:44,222 - your rendezvous, the bridge. Get going!' 799 00:54:44,681 --> 00:54:51,103 'Maybe... maybe there is a contact on the train... waiting for you.' 800 00:54:51,104 --> 00:54:57,729 'Yes, that's it - waiting till the last minute - yes - to test your nerve... 801 00:54:57,730 --> 00:55:06,072 to see if you will prepare to jump.' 802 00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:17,045 'Scuse me. 803 00:55:17,046 --> 00:55:20,465 Have you any orders for me, sir? 804 00:55:20,466 --> 00:55:23,004 Orders?! I just want to pass. 805 00:55:23,005 --> 00:55:24,607 Sure, sir? 806 00:55:24,608 --> 00:55:26,138 Quite sure. 807 00:55:26,139 --> 00:55:27,926 Don't you want me for anything, sir? 808 00:55:27,927 --> 00:55:36,269 No, I do not! 809 00:56:38,586 --> 00:56:43,006 Helping Hands... Oh, yes... Oh, it's you! 810 00:56:43,007 --> 00:56:48,465 Oh, yes, most honoured we are, sir. I trust it's going according to plan. 811 00:56:48,466 --> 00:56:53,136 My man went to the Forth Bridge... 812 00:56:53,137 --> 00:56:54,559 Went where? 813 00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:57,641 To the Forth Bridge, as you said. 814 00:56:57,642 --> 00:57:01,191 No! I wanted a fourth at bridge! 815 00:57:01,192 --> 00:57:09,534 Oh... a fourth at bridge... 816 00:57:23,881 --> 00:57:26,049 This is it, Mr Handy. 817 00:57:26,050 --> 00:57:27,885 Thank you, Miss Cooling. 818 00:57:27,886 --> 00:57:32,550 No matter how well a firm is doing, it needs publicity. 819 00:57:32,552 --> 00:57:34,171 Yeah. Shut up! 820 00:57:34,172 --> 00:57:41,691 And that could well be the finest publicity we could have. 821 00:57:43,943 --> 00:57:49,234 Obviously, in a kitchen like this work is a luxurious pleasure. 822 00:57:49,235 --> 00:57:55,245 You can do so many things at once. 823 00:57:55,246 --> 00:57:57,367 Good set-up, old chap. 824 00:57:57,368 --> 00:58:00,370 Thank you, sir. But the PC's missing. The PC? 825 00:58:00,371 --> 00:58:02,586 Popsy cupboard. 826 00:58:02,587 --> 00:58:06,256 Now, musn't be naughty! 827 00:58:06,257 --> 00:58:14,599 Unimanual control, and it will go as fast as you like. Observe! 828 00:58:19,145 --> 00:58:27,487 I say! There is a popsy cupboard after all. 829 00:58:29,238 --> 00:58:37,580 Perfect safety. Fixed in a flash and unfixed likewise. 830 00:58:55,306 --> 00:58:59,768 None of you children want to rock on the rocking horse? 831 00:58:59,769 --> 00:59:01,806 Ride it yourself! 832 00:59:01,807 --> 00:59:03,772 I know what you want. 833 00:59:03,773 --> 00:59:07,734 Come along, a swing - anyone like a swing? 834 00:59:07,735 --> 00:59:09,945 No. 835 00:59:09,946 --> 00:59:12,155 I'll have a swing myself. 836 00:59:12,156 --> 00:59:20,498 Just to show you. Isn't it lovely? Look at me! Oh! 837 00:59:28,423 --> 00:59:32,691 The safety belt makes window-cleaning so cosy. 838 00:59:32,692 --> 00:59:37,305 It pays for itself in six tiny months. Ridiculous! 839 00:59:37,306 --> 00:59:42,389 Won't any little boy or girl sit on the other end and rock with me? 840 00:59:42,390 --> 00:59:44,771 No! 841 00:59:44,772 --> 00:59:49,109 To unharness the safety belt, all you do is AAAGH! 842 00:59:49,110 --> 00:59:52,404 Oh! 843 00:59:52,405 --> 00:59:54,505 I'm sorry, Lily. 844 00:59:54,506 --> 00:59:58,910 You made a wave! 845 00:59:58,911 --> 01:00:02,122 Who's the boiler? 846 01:00:02,123 --> 01:00:04,499 Ooh! 847 01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:10,088 May I ask you to move closer? 848 01:00:10,089 --> 01:00:13,693 Thank you. I do not wish to raise my voice too 849 01:00:13,694 --> 01:00:17,757 loudly, in case I wake the people in the next house. 850 01:00:17,758 --> 01:00:23,185 May I introduce you to the Bed of the Century? Here it is. 851 01:00:23,186 --> 01:00:29,983 Whatever you do in bed, this bed helps you do it better. 852 01:00:29,984 --> 01:00:34,065 Do you not believe me, madam? Come to bed with me! 853 01:00:34,066 --> 01:00:37,986 First... the neighbours may be watching... 854 01:00:37,987 --> 01:00:40,077 That's better. 855 01:00:40,078 --> 01:00:48,419 And so, to bed, and we will find out. 856 01:00:57,512 --> 01:01:03,809 A little television, perhaps? 857 01:01:03,810 --> 01:01:09,022 The early morning cup of tea? 858 01:01:09,023 --> 01:01:12,234 Or maybe you fancy a snack? 859 01:01:12,235 --> 01:01:16,780 La buffet. 860 01:01:16,781 --> 01:01:23,912 Perhaps you would like a nice, cosy read? 861 01:01:23,913 --> 01:01:27,624 Voila! 862 01:01:27,625 --> 01:01:33,588 Or maybe you've come to bed merely to sleep? Can happen, of course. 863 01:01:33,589 --> 01:01:41,638 Very well... Just recline on the Bed of the Century. 864 01:01:41,639 --> 01:01:44,766 Ooh! 865 01:01:44,767 --> 01:01:47,686 The position not quite right, no? 866 01:01:47,687 --> 01:01:51,106 How often that can happen. 867 01:01:51,107 --> 01:01:56,236 The Bed of the Century will solve this small problem for you. 868 01:01:56,237 --> 01:01:58,635 Merely recline - do not move. 869 01:01:58,636 --> 01:02:03,113 Our mould-to-the-body mattress does it all for you. 870 01:02:03,114 --> 01:02:08,707 Watch, watch, watch. 871 01:02:08,708 --> 01:02:13,795 Eh? What's going on? 872 01:02:13,796 --> 01:02:22,137 Fred! There's something wrong with the bed, Fred! 873 01:02:22,138 --> 01:02:30,480 Wagon train! 874 01:02:32,565 --> 01:02:40,907 One for the pot! 875 01:02:59,318 --> 01:03:01,444 You're not our Lou. 876 01:03:01,445 --> 01:03:07,742 No. Your Lou's a bit off colour today, so I come to take his place. 877 01:03:07,743 --> 01:03:09,994 In there? Never! 878 01:03:09,995 --> 01:03:13,665 It's OK, I know the rule - silence. 879 01:03:13,666 --> 01:03:16,042 You're not trained for it. 880 01:03:16,043 --> 01:03:19,087 Oh, come, come, come, please, Sarge. 881 01:03:19,088 --> 01:03:27,429 What training do you need to keep quiet for a few hours? Don't worry! 882 01:03:35,182 --> 01:03:43,524 Shh! 883 01:05:28,843 --> 01:05:32,679 Quiet! Quiet! 884 01:05:32,680 --> 01:05:36,432 QUIET!!! 885 01:05:36,433 --> 01:05:44,775 You mustn't speak! 886 01:05:45,651 --> 01:05:48,403 Good morning, Mr Handy. 887 01:05:48,404 --> 01:05:50,108 You look dazed. 888 01:05:50,109 --> 01:05:54,784 I am. 889 01:05:54,785 --> 01:05:56,869 What's it all for? 890 01:05:56,871 --> 01:05:59,539 Streamlined organisation. 891 01:05:59,540 --> 01:06:04,997 If it's good for the business, of course. Perhaps you'll explain. 892 01:06:04,998 --> 01:06:07,559 I have made terrible mistakes. 893 01:06:07,560 --> 01:06:10,049 You're a tower of strength! 894 01:06:10,050 --> 01:06:15,847 Every tower needs foundations, and these are mine. 895 01:06:15,848 --> 01:06:21,222 Each job is filed here, cross- referenced there, costed here... 896 01:06:21,223 --> 01:06:24,355 ..assigned to an available operator. 897 01:06:24,356 --> 01:06:28,938 All of which is secondary to the operative procedure. 898 01:06:28,939 --> 01:06:37,281 Oh, yes, operative, yeah. 899 01:06:38,204 --> 01:06:46,545 Oh, b... 900 01:06:52,092 --> 01:07:00,434 Oh, I don't suppose it'll matter. 901 01:07:02,686 --> 01:07:04,536 Morning! 902 01:07:04,537 --> 01:07:06,522 Morning. 903 01:07:06,524 --> 01:07:08,358 Ingenious system, eh? 904 01:07:08,359 --> 01:07:11,606 Oh, yes. No possibility of error? 905 01:07:11,607 --> 01:07:13,062 None whatsoever. 906 01:07:13,063 --> 01:07:14,484 Going my way? 907 01:07:14,485 --> 01:07:15,531 No. 908 01:07:15,533 --> 01:07:17,867 I thought we'd share a taxi. 909 01:07:17,868 --> 01:07:21,579 Well, I'm already thinking in Chinese. 910 01:07:21,580 --> 01:07:26,292 Chinese? Interpreting's my job today. Bye! 911 01:07:26,293 --> 01:07:30,082 Chinese - I wonder if it's true what they say. 912 01:07:30,084 --> 01:07:38,425 Francis! 913 01:07:40,850 --> 01:07:42,595 Good morning, Madam. 914 01:07:42,596 --> 01:07:43,635 Toushan. 915 01:07:43,636 --> 01:07:45,198 Pardon? 916 01:07:45,199 --> 01:07:47,126 Toushan. 917 01:07:47,127 --> 01:07:49,440 Of course! 918 01:07:49,441 --> 01:07:50,526 Coincidence 919 01:07:50,527 --> 01:07:56,739 - a friend of mine has gone all Chinese this morning as well. 920 01:07:56,740 --> 01:08:05,082 May - I - come - in? 921 01:08:16,510 --> 01:08:20,763 Please! Wait a minute! Look, please! 922 01:08:20,764 --> 01:08:23,057 There's been a mistake. 923 01:08:23,058 --> 01:08:26,806 Mistake? It's impossible. Gracious me! 924 01:08:26,807 --> 01:08:35,149 This must be Fr-Francisesis's job. 925 01:08:36,822 --> 01:08:38,589 What platform for Ely? 926 01:08:38,590 --> 01:08:40,283 Number one, over there. 927 01:08:40,284 --> 01:08:48,626 Thank you. I'll show them if I need a keeper. 928 01:08:48,709 --> 01:08:53,838 Come along, girls. 929 01:08:53,839 --> 01:08:56,043 Good morning. I'm your Helping Hand, I fancy. 930 01:08:56,045 --> 01:08:57,926 Go away. 931 01:08:57,927 --> 01:09:02,508 Oh, you expected me to be Chinese. 932 01:09:02,509 --> 01:09:04,057 Chinese? 933 01:09:04,058 --> 01:09:06,700 I expected your girls to be Chinese too. 934 01:09:06,701 --> 01:09:09,307 I don't know what you're talking about. 935 01:09:09,308 --> 01:09:12,602 As soon as I saw their breast... 936 01:09:12,603 --> 01:09:14,025 I beg your pardon! 937 01:09:14,026 --> 01:09:18,024 Breast pockets. I put two and two together. 938 01:09:18,025 --> 01:09:19,447 I want a policeman. 939 01:09:19,448 --> 01:09:22,784 I'll offer you a much better service. 940 01:09:22,785 --> 01:09:27,679 I speak Chinese, with a slight Cantonese accent. 941 01:09:27,680 --> 01:09:32,710 An interesting group of girls, European, of course. 942 01:09:32,711 --> 01:09:37,326 On their first contact with London they'll need me to, 943 01:09:37,327 --> 01:09:39,509 er... Shall we begin? 944 01:09:39,510 --> 01:09:40,760 Begin what? 945 01:09:40,761 --> 01:09:45,593 I'll go in the first taxi with some of the girls... 946 01:09:45,594 --> 01:09:48,269 Police! Madam... 947 01:09:48,270 --> 01:09:50,019 Police! 948 01:09:50,020 --> 01:09:51,437 What's the trouble? 949 01:09:51,438 --> 01:09:55,436 I'm ready to pick up this woman's girls. 950 01:09:55,437 --> 01:09:57,605 Oh? Yes, I speak Chinese. 951 01:09:57,606 --> 01:10:00,733 You speak what? Can't you understand English? 952 01:10:00,734 --> 01:10:02,503 Arrest this man. 953 01:10:02,504 --> 01:10:04,451 No, don't! 954 01:10:04,452 --> 01:10:06,364 They speak English. 955 01:10:06,365 --> 01:10:09,789 So what? They should speak Chinese. 956 01:10:09,790 --> 01:10:15,211 What am I doing here if they can speak English as well as what we can? 957 01:10:15,212 --> 01:10:16,504 Arrest this man. 958 01:10:16,505 --> 01:10:18,835 I'm working, I'm a linguist. 959 01:10:18,836 --> 01:10:21,129 That's a new name for it. 960 01:10:21,130 --> 01:10:22,463 How dare you! 961 01:10:22,464 --> 01:10:23,511 Shut up! 962 01:10:23,512 --> 01:10:27,009 Aw! They're handling a genius. 963 01:10:27,010 --> 01:10:35,352 I protest! Ah! Ah! Ah! Aw! Ah! 964 01:10:38,777 --> 01:10:41,315 You're Martin Paul, the actor. 965 01:10:41,316 --> 01:10:43,364 That's right. 966 01:10:43,365 --> 01:10:46,696 I thought this wasn't a beauty salon. 967 01:10:46,697 --> 01:10:51,039 Pardon? Oh, won't you please come in? 968 01:10:51,040 --> 01:10:55,037 I'm demonstrating a new beauty treatment. 969 01:10:55,038 --> 01:10:56,914 A very pretty mistake too. 970 01:10:56,915 --> 01:11:01,294 Mr Paul, please. You can help me dress and undress. 971 01:11:01,295 --> 01:11:03,551 Mr Paul, really! 972 01:11:03,552 --> 01:11:05,178 I like Helping Hands. 973 01:11:05,179 --> 01:11:06,862 Not helping yourself hands! 974 01:11:06,863 --> 01:11:08,473 But you don't understand. 975 01:11:08,474 --> 01:11:09,740 Will you please control yourself? 976 01:11:09,741 --> 01:11:11,812 My fifth marriage has just ended. 977 01:11:11,813 --> 01:11:13,811 What's that got to do with it? 978 01:11:13,812 --> 01:11:18,019 Console me, have pity on me in my hour of need. 979 01:11:18,020 --> 01:11:20,938 Who knows, you may well be number six! 980 01:11:20,939 --> 01:11:29,281 Waaa! Not on your nelly! I'm off. 981 01:11:32,164 --> 01:11:40,506 Pity. 982 01:11:42,925 --> 01:11:46,297 Morning, sir. Is the rehearsal being held here? 983 01:11:46,298 --> 01:11:48,591 It's a demonstration. 984 01:11:48,592 --> 01:11:50,319 Where's Mr Paul? 985 01:11:50,320 --> 01:11:51,975 Who's Mr Paul? 986 01:11:51,976 --> 01:11:54,143 There's been a mistake. 987 01:11:54,144 --> 01:11:57,749 I've assembled the beauty trade to watch a 988 01:11:57,750 --> 01:12:01,354 lovely girl undergoing our latest routine. 989 01:12:01,355 --> 01:12:04,690 Have I got a girl? No! 990 01:12:04,691 --> 01:12:06,615 Steady on. 991 01:12:11,830 --> 01:12:13,539 I've got you and I don't want you. 992 01:12:17,042 --> 01:12:20,879 Hello. Togetherness Marriage Agency? 993 01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:27,093 It's three minutes after the time she's supposed to have arrived. 994 01:12:27,094 --> 01:12:30,134 I'm on the verge of a most important 995 01:12:30,135 --> 01:12:33,933 meeting and you can't get her here on time. 996 01:12:33,934 --> 01:12:36,393 I am extremely dissatisfied. 997 01:12:36,394 --> 01:12:42,276 The next time I want a wife I shall take my custom elsewhere. 998 01:12:45,779 --> 01:12:54,121 She's here. 999 01:12:56,165 --> 01:12:58,223 Mr Beamish? 1000 01:12:58,224 --> 01:13:01,169 Oh, yes. 1001 01:13:01,170 --> 01:13:06,090 I know everything's going to be all right. 1002 01:13:06,091 --> 01:13:08,838 There's no reason why it shouldn't be. 1003 01:13:08,839 --> 01:13:12,425 How exquisite, how exciting. 1004 01:13:12,426 --> 01:13:14,716 May I come in? 1005 01:13:14,717 --> 01:13:22,315 Oh, please do. 1006 01:13:22,316 --> 01:13:24,776 How thoughtful to bring flowers. 1007 01:13:24,777 --> 01:13:26,665 That's what you wanted - 1008 01:13:26,666 --> 01:13:30,365 a woman's touch in your home. Do sit down. 1009 01:13:30,366 --> 01:13:35,995 I can't sit down, there's so much to do. Where do you want me to start? 1010 01:13:35,996 --> 01:13:40,416 I'll leave that to you. 1011 01:13:40,417 --> 01:13:46,839 That doesn't look very comfortable. 1012 01:13:46,841 --> 01:13:50,051 Comfortable enough for anybody now. 1013 01:13:50,052 --> 01:13:55,431 Yes. Isn't it wonderful, we're the same religion. 1014 01:13:55,537 --> 01:13:56,724 Eh? 1015 01:13:56,725 --> 01:14:00,765 Isn't it good the agency takes care of such things? 1016 01:14:00,766 --> 01:14:02,263 Do they? 1017 01:14:02,264 --> 01:14:04,440 Definitely. 1018 01:14:04,441 --> 01:14:06,968 Your beliefs don't concern me. 1019 01:14:06,969 --> 01:14:12,443 The important thing is to get on with the job and enjoy it. 1020 01:14:12,444 --> 01:14:13,950 But don't you want to talk? 1021 01:14:13,951 --> 01:14:19,700 Talk? We both know what I'm here to do. What's there to talk about? 1022 01:14:19,701 --> 01:14:21,953 You sound more experienced than I imagined. 1023 01:14:21,954 --> 01:14:24,372 I've had plenty of variety. 1024 01:14:24,373 --> 01:14:27,542 Variety? That's why I joined. 1025 01:14:27,543 --> 01:14:28,548 Of course. 1026 01:14:28,549 --> 01:14:33,005 I don't mind. You must take the rough with the smooth. 1027 01:14:33,006 --> 01:14:34,483 What are you doing? 1028 01:14:34,484 --> 01:14:35,889 Stripping for action. 1029 01:14:35,890 --> 01:14:40,888 I like to be comfy. You don't have to do anything. 1030 01:14:40,889 --> 01:14:41,978 I think you ought to go. 1031 01:14:41,979 --> 01:14:45,351 But I haven't done anything yet. 1032 01:14:45,352 --> 01:14:47,767 And I don't want you to. 1033 01:14:47,768 --> 01:14:50,111 There's been a mistake. 1034 01:14:50,112 --> 01:14:52,817 You specifically asked for flowers. 1035 01:14:52,818 --> 01:14:54,819 I've got the letter here. 1036 01:14:54,820 --> 01:14:56,296 Show me. 1037 01:14:56,297 --> 01:15:04,639 Show me. 1038 01:15:06,086 --> 01:15:08,645 Helping Hands. 1039 01:15:08,646 --> 01:15:12,467 Marriage agency? 1040 01:15:12,468 --> 01:15:19,135 I thought you wanted someone to tidy the place, a woman's touch for... 1041 01:15:19,136 --> 01:15:24,187 A tea party for my aunt in two weeks' time. 1042 01:15:24,188 --> 01:15:28,066 Here we are. Aren't they lambs? 1043 01:15:28,067 --> 01:15:31,069 They look like birds to me. 1044 01:15:31,070 --> 01:15:34,129 Where's the show, then? 1045 01:15:34,130 --> 01:15:37,116 Olympia, next year. 1046 01:15:37,117 --> 01:15:41,240 No, I mean your show. That must be a corker. 1047 01:15:41,241 --> 01:15:46,000 Must it? You're crafty. You're dead crafty. 1048 01:15:46,001 --> 01:15:50,713 It looks like an ordinary house. Where do you keep them? 1049 01:15:50,714 --> 01:15:52,989 Keep what? You know. 1050 01:15:52,990 --> 01:15:54,300 But I don't. 1051 01:15:54,301 --> 01:15:58,304 You can rely on discretion with us. 1052 01:15:58,305 --> 01:16:01,636 If you want me to do the job, I must know where they are. 1053 01:16:01,637 --> 01:16:08,147 But they're here. Can you not see? 1054 01:16:08,148 --> 01:16:11,401 Where? What do you mean? 1055 01:16:11,402 --> 01:16:13,835 Where do the girls undress?! 1056 01:16:13,836 --> 01:16:15,720 There are no girls here. 1057 01:16:15,721 --> 01:16:17,532 Who does undress here, then? 1058 01:16:17,533 --> 01:16:21,202 Only the old woman when she goes to bed. 1059 01:16:21,203 --> 01:16:22,370 Put his head in a bucket. 1060 01:16:22,371 --> 01:16:24,534 You do and I'll bite your thumb off. 1061 01:16:24,535 --> 01:16:26,207 Get out of it. 1062 01:16:26,208 --> 01:16:29,002 You are from Helping Hands? 1063 01:16:29,003 --> 01:16:31,791 Of course, I'm your chucker-out. 1064 01:16:31,792 --> 01:16:35,133 There's been a mistake. 1065 01:16:35,134 --> 01:16:43,475 # SLOW JAZZ 1066 01:16:46,061 --> 01:16:47,645 Oh, hello. 1067 01:16:47,646 --> 01:16:49,188 What do you want? 1068 01:16:49,190 --> 01:16:52,270 Your birds. What sort are they? 1069 01:16:52,271 --> 01:16:53,484 What sort do you like? 1070 01:16:53,485 --> 01:16:56,357 Blue tits. Have you got any? 1071 01:16:56,358 --> 01:16:59,193 No, we've got central heating. 1072 01:16:59,194 --> 01:17:01,284 Oh, tropical birds. 1073 01:17:01,285 --> 01:17:03,202 We have one from Ceylon. 1074 01:17:03,204 --> 01:17:08,166 Oh, my goodness, how do I keep the poor things warm in a taxi? 1075 01:17:08,167 --> 01:17:14,589 Look, chum, this is a respectable place, you could bring your aunt. 1076 01:17:14,590 --> 01:17:17,217 Oh, thank you. 1077 01:17:17,218 --> 01:17:19,422 You're not from Helping Hands? 1078 01:17:19,423 --> 01:17:20,887 Yes. 1079 01:17:20,888 --> 01:17:22,513 You made a mistake. 1080 01:17:22,515 --> 01:17:25,016 I can't, we've got a system. 1081 01:17:25,017 --> 01:17:31,397 I asked for a chucker-out. We've had trouble with gatecrashers. 1082 01:17:31,398 --> 01:17:33,686 I wanted somebody tough to turf them out. 1083 01:17:33,687 --> 01:17:35,021 And you got me. 1084 01:17:35,022 --> 01:17:36,611 Yeah. 1085 01:17:36,612 --> 01:17:41,861 Yes. A job's a job, orders are orders. When do I start? 1086 01:17:41,862 --> 01:17:45,286 You mean you'll take the job? 1087 01:17:45,287 --> 01:17:46,287 Yes, please. 1088 01:17:46,288 --> 01:17:49,494 Well, bully for you. 1089 01:17:49,495 --> 01:17:53,956 Thanks. 1090 01:17:53,957 --> 01:17:55,880 Oh, I say! 1091 01:17:55,881 --> 01:18:03,888 I couldn't bring my aunty here. 1092 01:18:03,889 --> 01:18:05,139 Thank you. 1093 01:18:05,140 --> 01:18:08,017 You're welcome. 1094 01:18:08,018 --> 01:18:10,103 Gee up, gee up, gee up! 1095 01:18:10,104 --> 01:18:18,445 You need a punch up the beak. 1096 01:18:19,613 --> 01:18:21,739 How do you do? 1097 01:18:21,740 --> 01:18:27,365 I was thinking early busy, wondering if you're ready for the frail. 1098 01:18:27,366 --> 01:18:33,121 Sir, perhaps I'll understand you if you talk slowly. 1099 01:18:33,122 --> 01:18:35,920 Do me a favour - slowly. 1100 01:18:35,921 --> 01:18:44,263 For many crowthers, I have omster investor moerd craymen foil. 1101 01:18:44,388 --> 01:18:47,051 I just don't understand him. 1102 01:18:47,052 --> 01:18:48,821 I do. 1103 01:18:48,822 --> 01:18:50,518 You do? 1104 01:18:50,519 --> 01:18:53,062 He gobbledegooks. 1105 01:18:53,063 --> 01:18:54,746 I don't care what he is. 1106 01:18:54,747 --> 01:18:56,735 You don't understand. 1107 01:18:56,736 --> 01:18:58,688 I know. Translate it. 1108 01:18:58,689 --> 01:18:59,736 How do you do? 1109 01:18:59,737 --> 01:19:02,358 How do you do? Minda plow interpri? 1110 01:19:02,359 --> 01:19:04,908 Well, how extraordin necessar tooly. 1111 01:19:04,909 --> 01:19:09,913 You can strowl and tell Mr hayden there was goeden. 1112 01:19:09,914 --> 01:19:14,579 Prepare yourself for a shock. This is your landlord... 1113 01:19:14,580 --> 01:19:16,961 ..and he's just given you notice. 1114 01:19:16,962 --> 01:19:21,753 Because I don't talk his language? Racial prejudice. 1115 01:19:21,754 --> 01:19:25,720 No prejudice. Kalaba boawal. 1116 01:19:25,721 --> 01:19:30,433 Each man's investment bowl futures. 1117 01:19:30,434 --> 01:19:34,103 And therefore us all upsars. 1118 01:19:34,104 --> 01:19:37,351 He's just received a much better offer for these premises. 1119 01:19:37,352 --> 01:19:39,484 That's nice! 1120 01:19:39,485 --> 01:19:42,273 Just as we were settling in so comfortably. 1121 01:19:42,274 --> 01:19:45,377 I don't realise the problem sown. 1122 01:19:45,378 --> 01:19:48,993 Get the message home for weeks. 1123 01:19:48,994 --> 01:19:53,284 He's been trying to tell you for weeks about it... 1124 01:19:53,285 --> 01:19:55,833 ..to soften the blow. 1125 01:19:55,835 --> 01:19:59,290 I'm sure we'd all chip in to cover the increase. 1126 01:19:59,291 --> 01:20:02,006 Yeah. 1127 01:20:02,007 --> 01:20:04,842 No, we'll find new premises. 1128 01:20:04,844 --> 01:20:08,925 It took you three months to find this place and it's no palace. 1129 01:20:08,926 --> 01:20:10,840 That's the end of Helping Hands. 1130 01:20:10,841 --> 01:20:12,487 Back to the labour exchange. 1131 01:20:12,488 --> 01:20:14,373 There must be some way out. 1132 01:20:14,374 --> 01:20:16,187 Yeah, that door, we're sunk. 1133 01:20:16,188 --> 01:20:18,684 Surely there's something we can do. 1134 01:20:18,685 --> 01:20:21,067 We must be sensible. 1135 01:20:21,068 --> 01:20:24,070 In his shoes, I'd do the same. 1136 01:20:24,071 --> 01:20:26,129 In his shoes, I'd run for me life. 1137 01:20:26,130 --> 01:20:28,910 It's not gonna solve our problem. 1138 01:20:28,911 --> 01:20:31,740 All conscience and shedy tear. 1139 01:20:31,741 --> 01:20:34,497 But I found a wet sea and water... 1140 01:20:34,498 --> 01:20:41,671 ..but I say you can all stay remain if you suffer generarops. 1141 01:20:41,672 --> 01:20:45,628 He's moved by our loyalty to this enterprise... 1142 01:20:45,629 --> 01:20:49,804 ..and we can stay. 1143 01:20:49,805 --> 01:20:52,765 Oh, that's nice. Thank you. 1144 01:20:52,766 --> 01:20:55,930 If we will do something for him. 1145 01:20:55,931 --> 01:20:58,097 What? I'll do anything. 1146 01:20:58,098 --> 01:21:00,356 I'll do anything. 1147 01:21:00,357 --> 01:21:06,524 I have in this enviros beautiful lawns a great bildis biroque... 1148 01:21:06,525 --> 01:21:12,655 ..and a gargol in front entrals, windy staircase up to the ceily... 1149 01:21:12,656 --> 01:21:18,887 ..and shandy ladies, fine centra grives with Van Goghy... 1150 01:21:18,888 --> 01:21:25,084 ..and if anyone come works themselves to stickabick... 1151 01:21:25,085 --> 01:21:31,304 ..this leasy is handy-ho, garba. 1152 01:21:31,305 --> 01:21:37,769 His main business is property development. 1153 01:21:37,770 --> 01:21:42,106 He's bought the oldest, dirtiest house he's ever had... 1154 01:21:42,107 --> 01:21:45,316 ..and the cleaning bill is prohibitive. 1155 01:21:45,317 --> 01:21:50,449 If we all clean it for him, he'll give us a 99-years lease. 1156 01:21:53,160 --> 01:21:54,906 Why not make it the round 100? 1157 01:21:54,907 --> 01:21:55,912 You shuppy caky. 1158 01:21:55,913 --> 01:22:04,255 You shut your cakehole. 1159 01:22:13,472 --> 01:22:17,470 It'll take 99 years to clear up this dump. 1160 01:22:17,471 --> 01:22:20,103 Yeah, well, step by step. 1161 01:22:20,104 --> 01:22:22,814 OK, boss, where do we start? 1162 01:22:22,815 --> 01:22:26,333 To make it easier to walk about, the floor first. 1163 01:22:26,334 --> 01:22:29,779 It's better to start at the top of the house. 1164 01:22:29,780 --> 01:22:34,320 Disturbed dust will fall down and muck up what we've already cleaned. 1165 01:22:34,321 --> 01:22:38,783 May I submit for the sake of efficient team working... 1166 01:22:38,784 --> 01:22:41,416 ..that we all belt up. 1167 01:22:41,417 --> 01:22:43,543 Always the gent. 1168 01:22:43,544 --> 01:22:48,089 Let's put ourselves in the hands of Sir Handy. 1169 01:22:48,090 --> 01:22:53,548 I like it noted I suggested the suggestion I suggested. 1170 01:22:53,549 --> 01:22:55,550 Very suggestive it was too. 1171 01:22:55,551 --> 01:22:57,632 Over here, please. 1172 01:22:57,633 --> 01:23:00,509 Who's the scrubber? 1173 01:23:00,510 --> 01:23:06,524 In a straight line. 1174 01:23:06,525 --> 01:23:10,486 Get in a straight line. Come on. 1175 01:23:10,487 --> 01:23:13,948 Right now, you ready. Quick sweep! 1176 01:23:13,949 --> 01:23:17,952 One, two, one, two, one, two... 1177 01:23:17,953 --> 01:23:21,456 CHOKING 1178 01:23:21,457 --> 01:23:29,798 I'll get some water. 1179 01:23:32,218 --> 01:23:40,559 Here, there's no water, we'll have to turn on... the... the main. 1180 01:23:40,935 --> 01:23:43,603 The water mains. 1181 01:23:43,604 --> 01:23:47,649 Wonder where they are. 1182 01:23:47,650 --> 01:23:53,112 It's usually in the cellar. 1183 01:23:53,113 --> 01:23:58,738 I'll nip down and look. If I find it I'll shout, you turn the tap on. 1184 01:23:58,739 --> 01:23:59,786 THUD 1185 01:23:59,787 --> 01:24:02,038 Mr Handy! 1186 01:24:02,039 --> 01:24:04,707 Turn the flaming light on! 1187 01:24:04,708 --> 01:24:08,289 Oh, yes, but I'm not sure where they put the... 1188 01:24:08,290 --> 01:24:10,213 Argh! 1189 01:24:10,214 --> 01:24:12,835 Don't go, there's so few left. 1190 01:24:12,836 --> 01:24:15,385 Where's the flaming light?! 1191 01:24:15,386 --> 01:24:18,596 The electricity doesn't seem to be connected. 1192 01:24:18,597 --> 01:24:22,345 Someone might have told you the stairs begin immediately. 1193 01:24:22,346 --> 01:24:23,805 Well, they didn't, did they?! 1194 01:24:23,806 --> 01:24:26,479 No, they didn't! Ohhh! 1195 01:24:26,480 --> 01:24:29,352 Can you find the water main in the dark? 1196 01:24:29,353 --> 01:24:31,484 I'll try. 1197 01:24:31,485 --> 01:24:36,281 Oh, blimey! I found it wiht my blasted shin! 1198 01:24:36,282 --> 01:24:39,284 Help, don't just stand there! 1199 01:24:39,285 --> 01:24:45,164 I say, how did you know where I was standing? Ooooh! 1200 01:24:45,165 --> 01:24:48,121 I've just remembered, I left the tap turned on. 1201 01:24:48,122 --> 01:24:49,789 We got it! Yeah! 1202 01:24:49,790 --> 01:24:58,132 Hurray! 1203 01:25:05,269 --> 01:25:07,369 Women and children first! 1204 01:25:07,370 --> 01:25:15,712 Thank you, Mother, come on! 1205 01:25:25,998 --> 01:25:34,340 Francis, where are you? Where have you gone? 1206 01:25:45,267 --> 01:25:47,185 Turn it off! 1207 01:25:47,186 --> 01:25:55,318 I've just turned it on. 1208 01:25:55,319 --> 01:25:57,445 Turn it off! 1209 01:25:57,446 --> 01:26:00,949 Turn off the main! 1210 01:26:00,950 --> 01:26:06,829 Get down there and turn off the main! 1211 01:26:06,830 --> 01:26:14,587 Break it down! 1212 01:26:14,588 --> 01:26:18,216 Go on! 1213 01:26:18,217 --> 01:26:20,760 Are you all right?! 1214 01:26:20,761 --> 01:26:23,846 Of course he is. He's done it before 1215 01:26:23,848 --> 01:26:31,020 Fancy charging a rotting old door like that. 1216 01:26:31,021 --> 01:26:34,602 Any idiot can tell if a door's solid. 1217 01:26:34,603 --> 01:26:37,860 Test it. Simple. 1218 01:26:37,862 --> 01:26:43,825 Argh! 1219 01:26:43,826 --> 01:26:46,119 Hey, Dave! 1220 01:26:46,120 --> 01:26:51,124 Hello. I'm all right, and I've turned off the main. 1221 01:26:51,125 --> 01:26:53,210 The water will die down in a moment. 1222 01:26:59,508 --> 01:27:02,427 There's a big hole. 1223 01:27:02,428 --> 01:27:06,347 I did suggest we started upstairs. 1224 01:27:06,348 --> 01:27:08,010 Look at all the mess. 1225 01:27:08,011 --> 01:27:09,225 I'm looking. 1226 01:27:09,226 --> 01:27:13,397 This is the end of Helping Hands. 1227 01:27:23,824 --> 01:27:28,202 What a remarkable organisation set to sure. 1228 01:27:28,204 --> 01:27:33,453 Who would you know I'd decide to demolish all this propy... 1229 01:27:33,454 --> 01:27:37,331 ..and to build a luxury modern flabablock? 1230 01:27:37,332 --> 01:27:38,875 You can say that again. 1231 01:27:38,876 --> 01:27:40,042 Flabablock. 1232 01:27:40,044 --> 01:27:41,806 Cor! Remarkabold. 1233 01:27:41,807 --> 01:27:46,972 An extraordinary pace of progress in such a short tie load. Folly, folly. 1234 01:27:50,601 --> 01:27:53,389 Only one thing to sum up it. 1235 01:27:53,390 --> 01:27:55,242 What's that? 1236 01:27:55,243 --> 01:27:58,524 Carry-okus. 1237 01:27:58,526 --> 01:28:01,361 Goodly-bye load. 1238 01:28:01,362 --> 01:28:07,195 "What an organisation you are. How could you know I'd change my mind... 1239 01:28:07,196 --> 01:28:12,784 ..and pull the house down - the greenhouse and wash house and..." 1240 01:28:12,785 --> 01:28:16,084 That fell down of its own accord. 1241 01:28:16,085 --> 01:28:19,603 He's going to build a luxury block of flats. 1242 01:28:19,604 --> 01:28:23,086 Only one thing remains to be said - carry on! 1243 01:28:23,087 --> 01:28:25,427 Regardless! 88291