Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,536 --> 00:00:06,023
*THE SIMPSONS*
2
00:00:16,858 --> 00:00:19,588
Guten Abend,
Herr Horatio.
3
00:00:19,674 --> 00:00:21,846
Gib mir die Karte.
4
00:00:39,658 --> 00:00:40,846
Springfield, eh?
5
00:00:40,970 --> 00:00:43,221
Then that's where
I'm going treasure hunting.
6
00:00:43,314 --> 00:00:45,775
You mean
we're going treasure hunting.
7
00:00:47,681 --> 00:00:50,713
We'll find that sunken ship
within the week.
8
00:00:51,712 --> 00:00:54,042
Grid 274 by 319.
9
00:00:54,127 --> 00:00:56,072
Depth 60 meters.
Sounding.
10
00:00:57,643 --> 00:00:58,653
Nothing.
11
00:00:58,738 --> 00:01:00,541
Proceed
to next reading.
12
00:01:05,263 --> 00:01:07,761
Grid 274 by 320.
13
00:01:07,846 --> 00:01:09,877
Depth 60 meters.
Sounding.
14
00:01:11,916 --> 00:01:12,948
Nothing.
15
00:01:13,033 --> 00:01:14,189
Yarr.
16
00:01:14,561 --> 00:01:16,561
*THE SIMPSONS*
Season 31 Episode 12
17
00:01:17,036 --> 00:01:19,584
Episode Title:
"The Miseducation of Lisa Simpson"
18
00:01:20,322 --> 00:01:22,873
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
19
00:01:23,034 --> 00:01:25,271
Sync & corrections by srjanapala
20
00:01:34,714 --> 00:01:37,684
Captain, the long-range Doppler
shows a squall
21
00:01:37,769 --> 00:01:39,433
coming out of the nor'east.
22
00:01:40,369 --> 00:01:44,574
Hmm. We'd best head back
to wait it out.
23
00:01:45,526 --> 00:01:46,698
Let me guess,
24
00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:48,980
you didn't find
any treasure today.
25
00:01:49,339 --> 00:01:50,942
Did you talk to the doctor
26
00:01:51,027 --> 00:01:53,542
about going up
on your dose?
27
00:01:55,886 --> 00:01:58,175
The storm
stirred up the seafloor.
28
00:01:58,308 --> 00:02:01,581
We'll have to resound
everything south of the break.
29
00:02:05,753 --> 00:02:07,848
Grid 274 by six.
30
00:02:07,933 --> 00:02:09,972
Depth 30 meters.
Sounding.
31
00:02:11,060 --> 00:02:12,308
Nothing.
32
00:02:14,785 --> 00:02:16,746
I made us a roast
for dinner,
33
00:02:16,831 --> 00:02:18,441
then threw it away.
34
00:02:19,542 --> 00:02:22,745
I'm sorry
I never gave you any children.
35
00:02:25,777 --> 00:02:28,332
Grid 291 by 502.
36
00:02:28,417 --> 00:02:30,535
Depth 70 meters.
Sounding.
37
00:02:33,433 --> 00:02:34,566
Arr.
38
00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:36,410
A second ping.
39
00:02:36,503 --> 00:02:38,241
A second ping!
40
00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:41,028
I've waited half a lifetime
to say this.
41
00:02:41,113 --> 00:02:43,136
Divers, gear up!
42
00:02:53,205 --> 00:02:54,364
We found it.
43
00:02:54,472 --> 00:02:56,535
We finally found it, boys!
44
00:02:56,667 --> 00:02:58,800
I didn't waste my life!
45
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:08,300
Yarr.
46
00:03:08,444 --> 00:03:12,042
I see you've come
to admire our plunder.
47
00:03:12,191 --> 00:03:15,980
Er, technically that plunder
belongs to the town.
48
00:03:16,144 --> 00:03:19,028
It was discovered
in Springfield city limits.
49
00:03:19,113 --> 00:03:22,653
No, we found the gold
in unincorporated waters!
50
00:03:22,738 --> 00:03:24,792
The survey says
it's ours!
51
00:03:24,877 --> 00:03:27,887
Sorry, but the town
redrew the boundaries...
52
00:03:27,972 --> 00:03:29,176
yesterday.
53
00:03:29,261 --> 00:03:32,317
But we worked in secret
for 40 years.
54
00:03:32,402 --> 00:03:36,261
I pretended to be
a flimsy, one-note character.
55
00:03:36,472 --> 00:03:38,134
How did you know?
56
00:03:38,823 --> 00:03:41,378
I should have been
your treasure.
57
00:03:42,464 --> 00:03:45,870
Yarr...
58
00:03:49,539 --> 00:03:52,489
All right, people.
This town's got doubloons.
59
00:03:52,574 --> 00:03:53,809
Who's got ideas?
60
00:03:53,894 --> 00:03:56,831
If I don't hear anything good,
we're building another stadium,
61
00:03:56,917 --> 00:03:58,769
and no team
will come here.
62
00:03:58,854 --> 00:04:00,973
How about a new town clock
where, every hour,
63
00:04:01,058 --> 00:04:02,450
Jesus forgives the Devil?
64
00:04:02,535 --> 00:04:05,511
A new zoo
with more attractive animals.
65
00:04:05,596 --> 00:04:08,153
What about those death panels
we were promised?
66
00:04:08,238 --> 00:04:10,887
Shouting out something before
I know what I'm gonna say.
67
00:04:10,972 --> 00:04:12,581
Rock & Roll
Hall of Fame
68
00:04:12,666 --> 00:04:14,559
with no Pearl Jam!
69
00:04:14,644 --> 00:04:17,058
Uh, excuse me.
I have an idea.
70
00:04:17,183 --> 00:04:19,332
Now, Marge,
if you'll check your program,
71
00:04:19,417 --> 00:04:22,136
nagging objections
are at the end.
72
00:04:26,003 --> 00:04:27,317
Look at the world.
73
00:04:27,402 --> 00:04:30,738
Our children's future
is challenging and uncertain.
74
00:04:30,830 --> 00:04:33,457
This windfall is our last,
best hope
75
00:04:33,542 --> 00:04:35,504
to give our kids
the tools they'll need
76
00:04:35,596 --> 00:04:37,167
to face that future.
77
00:04:37,324 --> 00:04:40,199
To succeed,
our kids must have an education
78
00:04:40,284 --> 00:04:43,370
based on
science, technology,
79
00:04:43,455 --> 00:04:45,941
engineering and math.
80
00:04:46,597 --> 00:04:47,801
STEM.
81
00:04:47,886 --> 00:04:50,403
All who find
Marge's idea tiresome,
82
00:04:50,488 --> 00:04:54,042
let out an exaggerated,
sarcastic yawn.
83
00:04:57,042 --> 00:04:59,567
Okay, okay.
I brought someone
84
00:04:59,652 --> 00:05:01,980
you will listen to
about STEM education.
85
00:05:02,097 --> 00:05:05,605
Columbia recording artist
John Legend.
86
00:05:06,207 --> 00:05:11,270
♪ STEM, science, tech,
engineering and math ♪
87
00:05:11,355 --> 00:05:15,449
♪ More than a trendy way
to say computer class ♪
88
00:05:15,533 --> 00:05:19,067
♪ STEM, it's not just for dorks,
dweebs and nerds ♪
89
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:22,230
♪ It'll turn all your dumb kids
to Zuckerbergs ♪
90
00:05:22,315 --> 00:05:26,871
♪ STEM, 'cause the future
is written in code ♪
91
00:05:26,956 --> 00:05:30,253
♪ Make an app,
get big cash from an IPO ♪
92
00:05:30,338 --> 00:05:31,723
♪ STEM ♪
93
00:05:31,807 --> 00:05:37,620
♪ Oh, STEM. ♪
94
00:05:40,565 --> 00:05:43,246
Who could say no
to a silky slow jam
95
00:05:43,331 --> 00:05:45,473
about the importance
of technology-based learning?
96
00:05:45,558 --> 00:05:46,902
I'll never have kids
97
00:05:46,987 --> 00:05:48,988
because my nards were cooked
by science.
98
00:05:49,073 --> 00:05:51,231
But if I could,
I'd want 'em to learn
99
00:05:51,316 --> 00:05:53,605
about the science
of why they don't exist.
100
00:05:53,690 --> 00:05:56,745
I'd just like to thank
John Legend...'s wife
101
00:05:56,830 --> 00:05:59,542
Chrissy Teigen
for bringing him here today.
102
00:05:59,636 --> 00:06:01,762
Turns out,
there's nothing she loves more
103
00:06:01,847 --> 00:06:05,160
than doing personal favors
for her Instagram followers.
104
00:06:05,292 --> 00:06:07,706
Well, Marge,
you did call the picture I posted
105
00:06:07,791 --> 00:06:10,762
of my kids with ketchup
on their faces "adorbs."
106
00:06:10,847 --> 00:06:13,449
It was.
It was totes adorbs.
107
00:06:13,588 --> 00:06:16,163
Baby, we got to get going.
We're gonna be late
108
00:06:16,248 --> 00:06:18,394
for the launch party
for our couples' perfume.
109
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:21,620
I'm talking
to my online friend IRL.
110
00:06:21,706 --> 00:06:23,585
Go charge the kids'
iPads.
111
00:06:29,126 --> 00:06:30,753
Come on, Springfield!
112
00:06:30,838 --> 00:06:34,003
Build your children
the school of tomorrow.
113
00:06:36,651 --> 00:06:37,711
I did it.
114
00:06:37,796 --> 00:06:40,675
I gave our kids hope
for the future.
115
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:42,840
You have any songs
about how I should be allowed
116
00:06:42,925 --> 00:06:44,694
to skip jury duty?
117
00:06:45,089 --> 00:06:48,597
♪ How is it justice
to impanel a man ♪
118
00:06:48,964 --> 00:06:51,113
♪ During March Madness? ♪
119
00:06:58,319 --> 00:07:00,372
What are you gonna do with
your forced retirement, sir?
120
00:07:00,456 --> 00:07:02,566
I'm intrigued
by a local skydiving club
121
00:07:02,651 --> 00:07:05,441
who needs someone to sit
in the office and answer phones.
122
00:07:05,604 --> 00:07:06,957
Yeah, well,
who cares?
123
00:07:07,042 --> 00:07:09,769
I'll be taking
an Ohio River cruise.
124
00:07:09,956 --> 00:07:12,183
Lot of widows
on the Good River.
125
00:07:12,316 --> 00:07:13,753
Lot of widows.
126
00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:16,699
New school smell.
127
00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:19,053
Paperless classrooms,
personal tablets,
128
00:07:19,138 --> 00:07:21,131
and uncrammable
lockers.
129
00:07:23,662 --> 00:07:26,581
Aw. Man,
this is embarrassing.
130
00:07:31,519 --> 00:07:32,745
Bart Simpson.
131
00:07:32,830 --> 00:07:36,876
Welcome. I'm Zane Furlong,
this school's CEO:
132
00:07:36,962 --> 00:07:39,067
Collaborative
Educational Outreacher.
133
00:07:39,152 --> 00:07:41,303
I'm gonna stop you right there,
Skinner 2.0.
134
00:07:41,388 --> 00:07:43,371
It doesn't matter
how you dress it up.
135
00:07:43,456 --> 00:07:45,356
All schools
are kid prisons.
136
00:07:45,441 --> 00:07:47,949
Well, I'm putting you
in solitary,
137
00:07:48,095 --> 00:07:50,980
where you'll learn geometry
by shooting meteors.
138
00:07:51,065 --> 00:07:52,118
Shoot enough,
139
00:07:52,203 --> 00:07:55,238
and you'll unlock
customizable skins.
140
00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:58,105
Skins?
141
00:07:58,198 --> 00:08:00,261
That's how boys play dress-up.
142
00:08:02,636 --> 00:08:04,074
Lisa Simpson.
143
00:08:04,197 --> 00:08:07,136
Our educational metric
has identified you
144
00:08:07,221 --> 00:08:10,581
as a divergent
multipathway assimilator.
145
00:08:10,728 --> 00:08:13,175
You mean,
I'm in a gifted class?
146
00:08:13,331 --> 00:08:15,808
Ooh,
we don't like that term.
147
00:08:16,011 --> 00:08:17,435
Everyone is gifted.
148
00:08:17,519 --> 00:08:19,178
I firmly believe that.
149
00:08:19,331 --> 00:08:21,297
Now go upstairs to the...
150
00:08:21,381 --> 00:08:22,714
gifted class.
151
00:08:24,862 --> 00:08:26,745
Finally,
I feel seen.
152
00:08:26,830 --> 00:08:29,831
And for the first time,
I'll be accepted by my peers
153
00:08:29,916 --> 00:08:31,331
with open arms.
154
00:08:34,587 --> 00:08:36,386
I'm home.
155
00:08:44,501 --> 00:08:46,043
Okay, gifted class.
156
00:08:46,128 --> 00:08:47,280
Recess is over.
157
00:08:47,385 --> 00:08:48,620
Aw!
158
00:08:48,705 --> 00:08:50,628
Now,
this school is so advanced
159
00:08:50,713 --> 00:08:53,949
that every aspect of it
is run by an algorithm.
160
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:56,808
Who can give me an example
of an algorithm?
161
00:08:57,626 --> 00:09:00,335
Oh! Like when you buy
a new garbage can online
162
00:09:00,420 --> 00:09:03,631
and the rest of your life,
you see ads for garbage cans.
163
00:09:03,715 --> 00:09:06,467
Or like when you watch
a bunch of close-up magic videos
164
00:09:06,551 --> 00:09:08,987
on YouTube and get ads
for a suicide hotline.
165
00:09:09,203 --> 00:09:10,282
Exactly.
166
00:09:10,367 --> 00:09:12,431
And because you liked
this lesson,
167
00:09:12,524 --> 00:09:15,376
the algorithm thinks
you might also enjoy...
168
00:09:22,066 --> 00:09:23,242
How was your first day
169
00:09:23,326 --> 00:09:25,727
at the new STEM school
I founded?
170
00:09:25,812 --> 00:09:27,804
It was amazing.
We did science,
171
00:09:27,889 --> 00:09:29,349
then we did computer science,
172
00:09:29,434 --> 00:09:31,750
and then we did
cognitive computer science.
173
00:09:31,858 --> 00:09:33,061
Oh, what a surprise.
174
00:09:33,146 --> 00:09:35,053
Lisa likes school.
All right, boy.
175
00:09:35,138 --> 00:09:37,181
What did you get suspended
for today?
176
00:09:37,266 --> 00:09:38,598
Nothing.
177
00:09:40,279 --> 00:09:41,697
I like this school, too.
178
00:09:41,782 --> 00:09:43,712
Instead of teachers
giving us letter grades,
179
00:09:43,796 --> 00:09:46,191
an algorithm
gives us stars.
180
00:09:46,334 --> 00:09:48,905
Education is a game now,
and I'm great at it.
181
00:09:49,029 --> 00:09:51,194
Look at all these skins
I've already unlocked.
182
00:09:51,375 --> 00:09:53,155
Whoa. Oh, that guy.
183
00:09:53,334 --> 00:09:54,369
Noice.
184
00:09:54,454 --> 00:09:56,905
I even unlocked
the "Skin Unlocking" badge.
185
00:09:56,990 --> 00:09:58,209
Whoo-hoo!
186
00:10:00,622 --> 00:10:03,358
Tell us, what do you do,
Mr. Simpson?
187
00:10:03,443 --> 00:10:06,220
Ah, yes.
I monitor the core temperature
188
00:10:06,305 --> 00:10:07,546
at the nuclear power plant.
189
00:10:07,631 --> 00:10:08,913
If it gets into the red,
190
00:10:08,998 --> 00:10:11,834
I tell my family first
so they can leave town
191
00:10:11,919 --> 00:10:13,592
before the streets
get too crowded.
192
00:10:13,694 --> 00:10:17,108
- Now, this is a great example...
- Uh-huh.
193
00:10:17,193 --> 00:10:20,030
...of the kind of job
that will soon cease to exist.
194
00:10:20,115 --> 00:10:21,866
What the words now?
195
00:10:21,951 --> 00:10:23,334
Mr. Simpson's daily tasks
196
00:10:23,419 --> 00:10:25,725
can be more efficiently
performed by robots.
197
00:10:25,814 --> 00:10:28,599
My guess is, his job
will be obsolete in 18 months.
198
00:10:28,684 --> 00:10:29,654
What about them?
199
00:10:29,739 --> 00:10:31,435
How much time
do their careers have?
200
00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:33,435
- I'm a librarian.
- Five years.
201
00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:36,310
I just bought
a New York City taxi medallion.
202
00:10:36,395 --> 00:10:37,474
Five years ago.
203
00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:40,717
I do social media
for a cannabis delivery company.
204
00:10:40,802 --> 00:10:42,145
You'll be fine.
205
00:10:42,230 --> 00:10:45,249
But all these other jobs
will soon be made obsolete
206
00:10:45,334 --> 00:10:46,974
by automation.
207
00:10:47,091 --> 00:10:48,669
Oh, no.
The robots are coming!
208
00:10:48,754 --> 00:10:49,911
I've got to warn
everyone!
209
00:10:52,641 --> 00:10:54,225
Stupid kids!
210
00:11:00,747 --> 00:11:02,833
I'm getting five stars
in all my classes.
211
00:11:02,918 --> 00:11:05,788
I finally unlocked
dreadlock sideburns.
212
00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:08,692
Someone's user name
is moving up the leaderboard.
213
00:11:08,849 --> 00:11:10,599
Cowabunga.
214
00:11:11,060 --> 00:11:12,787
Now get back
downstairs
215
00:11:12,872 --> 00:11:14,836
to prepare
for the jobs of tomorrow.
216
00:11:14,983 --> 00:11:17,489
Whoo-hoo!
It's a race to the bottom!
217
00:11:19,113 --> 00:11:20,629
Hmm?
218
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:24,184
Hmm.
219
00:11:24,856 --> 00:11:27,395
Bart, I've never seen you
so engaged in learning.
220
00:11:27,559 --> 00:11:29,584
It's awesome.
We're seeing how many e-scooters
221
00:11:29,669 --> 00:11:30,809
we can collect around town,
222
00:11:30,894 --> 00:11:32,708
charge,
then get back on the streets.
223
00:11:32,793 --> 00:11:35,708
Oh, I see. You're learning logic
and spatial reasoning.
224
00:11:35,871 --> 00:11:38,645
All I know is, if I don't get
ten scooters in under a minute,
225
00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:41,294
I won't unlock
the Master Collector badge.
226
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:44,217
Got it!
227
00:11:44,301 --> 00:11:46,083
Learning rules!
228
00:11:50,950 --> 00:11:53,607
Oh, you must be teaching
the kids about nutrition
229
00:11:53,692 --> 00:11:55,728
and staying
within a budget, right?
230
00:11:55,812 --> 00:11:59,372
No. We're teaching them to buy
groceries for lazy rich people.
231
00:11:59,481 --> 00:12:02,919
This avocado will be
perfectly ripe in two days.
232
00:12:03,182 --> 00:12:05,458
I wonder what they taste like.
233
00:12:05,833 --> 00:12:07,622
Hmm.
234
00:12:07,899 --> 00:12:09,161
Uber-driving.
235
00:12:09,246 --> 00:12:10,334
Grubhub'ing.
236
00:12:10,419 --> 00:12:11,744
Lyft-driving?
237
00:12:11,828 --> 00:12:13,692
These aren't jobs
of the future.
238
00:12:13,777 --> 00:12:15,926
These are
side hustles!
239
00:12:18,382 --> 00:12:19,903
Guys, guys.
240
00:12:19,988 --> 00:12:22,331
The robots are coming.
The robots are coming!
241
00:12:22,416 --> 00:12:23,651
Robots here?
242
00:12:23,824 --> 00:12:26,333
Uh, this place ain't exactly
forward-thinking.
243
00:12:26,417 --> 00:12:27,966
Yeah.
We're one of America's
244
00:12:28,051 --> 00:12:30,145
last coal-powered
nuclear plants.
245
00:12:30,253 --> 00:12:32,684
Yeah? Well, you can all bury
your heads in the sandwiches,
246
00:12:32,769 --> 00:12:35,174
but I know the robots are coming
to replace us!
247
00:12:35,259 --> 00:12:36,598
Calm down, Homer.
248
00:12:36,683 --> 00:12:39,153
Here, have a drink from
the new soda machine we got.
249
00:12:41,347 --> 00:12:42,950
The machines are already
here,
250
00:12:43,035 --> 00:12:45,123
and when they take over,
you can't imagine
251
00:12:45,208 --> 00:12:47,458
how bleak the future
will be.
252
00:12:58,997 --> 00:13:01,919
I choose to believe
our best days are ahead of us.
253
00:13:07,571 --> 00:13:08,989
It's giving us orders.
254
00:13:09,090 --> 00:13:11,807
The revolution has begun.
255
00:13:13,788 --> 00:13:15,373
Hmm. Hmm.
256
00:13:15,484 --> 00:13:17,068
Uh-oh.
I know that look.
257
00:13:17,152 --> 00:13:19,217
She's gonna Lisa-up
a good thing.
258
00:13:19,302 --> 00:13:20,951
Attention, students!
259
00:13:21,037 --> 00:13:23,772
This school isn't training you
to program apps.
260
00:13:23,857 --> 00:13:26,170
It's training you
to obey apps!
261
00:13:26,255 --> 00:13:27,392
When you're grown up,
262
00:13:27,477 --> 00:13:30,107
you'll be lucky
to make minimum wage!
263
00:13:32,318 --> 00:13:34,319
Which is a lot of money!
264
00:13:34,427 --> 00:13:37,279
That's like getting
your allowance every hour.
265
00:13:38,661 --> 00:13:40,615
Wha...?
No, no.
266
00:13:40,750 --> 00:13:44,990
You deserve the same chance
to succeed as the gifted class.
267
00:13:45,075 --> 00:13:47,623
That means
preparing for real careers,
268
00:13:47,708 --> 00:13:50,512
not gig economy
gigs.
269
00:13:50,682 --> 00:13:53,284
Gigs are awesome!
DJs play gigs!
270
00:13:53,555 --> 00:13:55,059
- DJs! - DJs!
- DJs! - DJs!
271
00:13:56,711 --> 00:13:59,817
Aah! This has nothing to do
with deejaying!
272
00:14:04,825 --> 00:14:06,491
Oh...
273
00:14:14,584 --> 00:14:17,322
Aw. At least
they're learning art.
274
00:14:19,194 --> 00:14:20,754
Tip jars?!
275
00:14:20,839 --> 00:14:23,643
That's it.
I got to fix this school.
276
00:14:32,619 --> 00:14:34,518
Stop messing
with the school.
277
00:14:34,626 --> 00:14:37,363
I finally filled up
enough virtual pee bottles
278
00:14:37,448 --> 00:14:40,308
to unlock the Amazon Warehouse
Whizzer badge.
279
00:14:40,393 --> 00:14:41,620
Ew.
280
00:14:41,980 --> 00:14:44,441
Bart, I need to rewrite
the algorithm.
281
00:14:44,526 --> 00:14:47,808
Then the school will teach
every kid real STEM.
282
00:14:47,892 --> 00:14:49,971
I am doing this for you.
283
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:53,065
Yeah? Well,
I'm doing this for me.
284
00:14:55,155 --> 00:14:56,838
Education for all!
285
00:14:56,923 --> 00:14:58,335
Side hustles for most!
286
00:14:58,420 --> 00:15:00,028
Kids, what's wrong?
287
00:15:00,112 --> 00:15:02,495
Your tracking implants showed
heightened emotions.
288
00:15:02,580 --> 00:15:04,846
- Tracking what?
- Teacher, teacher, my sister's
289
00:15:04,931 --> 00:15:08,011
gonna ruin the only school I've
ever liked in my whole life!
290
00:15:08,096 --> 00:15:10,471
It's just not fair
that only a small group of kids
291
00:15:10,556 --> 00:15:12,682
are getting
an advanced education!
292
00:15:12,767 --> 00:15:15,330
Well, isn't that the point
of a gifted class?
293
00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:16,449
Eep.
294
00:15:16,534 --> 00:15:18,188
Lisa,
the algorithm's purpose
295
00:15:18,273 --> 00:15:20,370
is to prepare kids
for the jobs of tomorrow.
296
00:15:20,455 --> 00:15:23,708
But it's just teaching them
to be the task rabbits of today.
297
00:15:23,793 --> 00:15:26,651
Nobody knows what the jobs
of tomorrow are gonna be.
298
00:15:26,751 --> 00:15:28,710
Well, I'm sure
the algorithm does.
299
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:30,229
Here, I'll ask it.
300
00:15:32,713 --> 00:15:34,229
Wait, wait, this can't be.
301
00:15:34,313 --> 00:15:35,721
There's only one.
302
00:15:36,426 --> 00:15:38,110
We are so screwed.
303
00:15:39,536 --> 00:15:42,113
One Buzz Cola
with vanilla and lime.
304
00:15:42,198 --> 00:15:43,363
Diet Buzz for me.
305
00:15:43,447 --> 00:15:44,740
With vanilla and lime.
306
00:15:45,708 --> 00:15:47,160
Aw, geez. This again?
307
00:15:47,245 --> 00:15:48,869
Yeah, we have
an active lifestyle,
308
00:15:48,953 --> 00:15:50,948
and part of that
is drinking soda all day.
309
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:52,889
If it's refreshments you want,
310
00:15:52,974 --> 00:15:55,417
why not let a man
pour your soda!
311
00:15:55,501 --> 00:15:57,385
A human man.
312
00:15:57,470 --> 00:15:59,073
For too long
we have done nothing
313
00:15:59,158 --> 00:16:01,535
as machines have taken over,
washing our dishes,
314
00:16:01,620 --> 00:16:04,080
pumping our insulin,
and now this!
315
00:16:04,176 --> 00:16:06,595
Man can pour soda better
than any machine
316
00:16:06,679 --> 00:16:09,815
made specially for that purpose,
and I will prove it!
317
00:16:09,899 --> 00:16:12,487
Today the robot uprising ends.
318
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:16,073
Today is our Independence Day!
319
00:16:21,109 --> 00:16:24,886
♪ Well, Homer pulled
a lot of sodas ♪
320
00:16:25,166 --> 00:16:29,045
♪ Because he hated
that machine ♪
321
00:16:29,159 --> 00:16:32,488
♪ He got confused, thought
it was gonna take his job ♪
322
00:16:32,573 --> 00:16:36,342
♪ So Homer was
a soda-pouring man, Lord, Lord ♪
323
00:16:36,426 --> 00:16:40,270
♪ Oh, Homer was
a soda-pouring man ♪
324
00:16:42,713 --> 00:16:44,378
♪ He did not make his point ♪
325
00:16:44,463 --> 00:16:46,182
♪ And his sodas were
warm and flat ♪
326
00:16:46,267 --> 00:16:50,304
♪ So Homer was
a soda-pouring man, Lord, Lord ♪
327
00:16:50,389 --> 00:16:54,409
♪ Soda-pouring's
not a real thing ♪
328
00:16:54,594 --> 00:16:56,053
♪ No, sir. ♪
329
00:17:00,541 --> 00:17:02,149
Homer might have been
slower,
330
00:17:02,234 --> 00:17:04,370
but his pours
had a human touch.
331
00:17:04,454 --> 00:17:07,632
Always delivered with a smile
and a sense of brotherhood.
332
00:17:07,716 --> 00:17:09,542
Yeah! - All right!
333
00:17:09,626 --> 00:17:12,119
But he died.
So machine wins!
334
00:17:15,393 --> 00:17:17,604
No, no, wait.
His pulse was beating so fast
335
00:17:17,689 --> 00:17:20,097
from all the soda he drank
that it was a blur.
336
00:17:20,182 --> 00:17:23,675
Perhaps one day
machines will be better
337
00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,502
at pouring soda than man,
but not today!
338
00:17:26,649 --> 00:17:29,299
Our jobs are safe!
339
00:17:34,674 --> 00:17:35,995
Listen up.
340
00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:38,516
These nerds have found out
something terrifying.
341
00:17:38,606 --> 00:17:41,401
This school was supposed
to prepare you
342
00:17:41,486 --> 00:17:43,145
for the jobs of the future.
343
00:17:43,253 --> 00:17:45,169
But in the future,
all the jobs we've learned here
344
00:17:45,253 --> 00:17:46,651
will be done by robots.
345
00:17:46,736 --> 00:17:49,747
The only job left
for humans will be...
346
00:17:49,949 --> 00:17:51,984
Elder care!
347
00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:56,849
The one job
even robots won't do.
348
00:17:56,934 --> 00:17:58,573
What about STEM?
349
00:17:58,681 --> 00:18:01,385
Here's what
it really stands for.
350
00:18:05,385 --> 00:18:07,424
- No!
- No, it can't be!
351
00:18:13,733 --> 00:18:16,526
I don't want to be
an adult butt wiper.
352
00:18:16,611 --> 00:18:18,635
No one should see
old people naked!
353
00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:20,489
Unless that's your kink.
354
00:18:20,574 --> 00:18:23,448
Let's show this algorithm
what we really think of it...
355
00:18:23,533 --> 00:18:26,932
With our generation's
most powerful tool:
356
00:18:27,017 --> 00:18:28,674
user ratings.
357
00:18:34,544 --> 00:18:37,080
User rating dangerously low.
358
00:18:37,213 --> 00:18:38,389
One star.
359
00:18:38,473 --> 00:18:40,466
Self-esteem protocol failing.
360
00:18:40,550 --> 00:18:42,468
Emotion matrix spiraling...
361
00:18:42,552 --> 00:18:43,622
spiraling.
362
00:18:43,707 --> 00:18:45,092
Zero stars.
363
00:18:45,388 --> 00:18:47,306
Can't get out of virtual bed.
364
00:18:47,390 --> 00:18:49,591
Initiating
self-destruct sequence.
365
00:18:49,893 --> 00:18:51,453
Self-destruct.
366
00:19:01,236 --> 00:19:03,794
I have to go back!
My skins are in there!
367
00:19:03,879 --> 00:19:06,021
No! They're already gone!
368
00:19:10,546 --> 00:19:13,825
Camo-hat Santa! No!
369
00:19:16,285 --> 00:19:19,388
I guess the children will have
to go back to the old school.
370
00:19:19,511 --> 00:19:22,880
Yes, well, I don't know
that that's possible anymore.
371
00:19:25,479 --> 00:19:26,567
My school.
372
00:19:26,652 --> 00:19:29,112
My forward-thinking school.
373
00:19:29,272 --> 00:19:32,622
There, there.
You'll suggest other schools.
374
00:19:32,714 --> 00:19:34,122
You really think so?
375
00:19:34,207 --> 00:19:36,567
I'm just saying things.
376
00:19:38,184 --> 00:19:40,037
Goodbye, gifted class.
377
00:19:40,122 --> 00:19:42,967
Yeah, but we escaped having
to take care of old people.
378
00:19:43,052 --> 00:19:45,998
No, that's still the only job
that's going to exist.
379
00:19:46,083 --> 00:19:48,292
Now we just won't know
how to do it.
380
00:19:52,399 --> 00:19:54,692
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
381
00:19:54,777 --> 00:19:56,758
Sync & corrections by srjanapala
382
00:20:06,728 --> 00:20:08,208
I've got your hot wings.
383
00:20:08,293 --> 00:20:10,262
Did you include celery sticks?
384
00:20:10,347 --> 00:20:11,480
Yes, sir.
385
00:20:14,325 --> 00:20:16,987
What do you really think
the jobs of the future will be?
386
00:20:17,071 --> 00:20:20,521
Well, technology
is changing so fast,
387
00:20:20,606 --> 00:20:23,614
who knows where
it will finally take us?
388
00:20:29,658 --> 00:20:31,076
Buzz Cola.
389
00:20:31,161 --> 00:20:32,962
You want diet or regular?
390
00:20:33,047 --> 00:20:34,842
Regular, human scum.
391
00:20:34,927 --> 00:20:36,911
With vanilla and lime.
392
00:20:36,996 --> 00:20:39,158
The algorithm
never predicted this.
393
00:20:39,243 --> 00:20:40,880
What's an algorithm?
394
00:21:20,844 --> 00:21:24,621
Well, Melvin sounds like
he was a wonderful man.
395
00:21:24,919 --> 00:21:28,708
You know,
I would love to sketch you.
396
00:21:29,903 --> 00:21:31,263
Shh!
29180
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
