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1
00:00:04,900 --> 00:00:07,162
Previously on "Crawford"...
2
00:00:07,164 --> 00:00:08,499
Are you okay?
3
00:00:08,501 --> 00:00:10,025
My roommate, she's high as shit,
4
00:00:10,026 --> 00:00:11,959
eating bleach pods and
frothing at the mouth,
5
00:00:11,961 --> 00:00:14,352
starts punching me in the
face, so I punch her back!
6
00:00:14,354 --> 00:00:16,147
- Anyways, she's moving out.
- So you need a roommate.
7
00:00:16,149 --> 00:00:17,783
I'm movin' in with Rita, Brian.
8
00:00:17,785 --> 00:00:20,475
RITA: Rule 1,
no friends allowed, ever.
9
00:00:20,477 --> 00:00:22,041
Why? Dad's gonna freak!
10
00:00:22,043 --> 00:00:24,136
DON: We're makin' a difference,
man, we're savin' raccoons!
11
00:00:24,138 --> 00:00:26,071
Well, what about making a
difference in your brother's life?
12
00:00:26,073 --> 00:00:28,594
If you leave, my game
will be so shook.
13
00:00:28,596 --> 00:00:31,924
(IN UNISON) Rockaberry Fruit Drones!
14
00:00:31,926 --> 00:00:35,185
Scale down that fruity stuff,
focus on the wheat.
15
00:00:35,188 --> 00:00:37,509
- Wheat Rock Drones.
- That is so cool.
16
00:00:37,511 --> 00:00:39,344
I love it. Let's make it happen!
17
00:00:39,346 --> 00:00:41,040
VERN: Taylor, the Froot
Loops jacket's missing.
18
00:00:41,042 --> 00:00:42,835
- I got it.
- Yes.
19
00:00:42,837 --> 00:00:45,169
BRIAN: Mom, I lost the jacket.
CYNTHIA: You're kidding.
20
00:00:45,171 --> 00:00:47,134
How are things with Darren?
21
00:00:47,135 --> 00:00:48,958
WENDY: I know that you
think he's a loser.
22
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:51,460
- What?
- We're great, Mom. What's up?
23
00:00:52,959 --> 00:01:02,398
???
24
00:01:02,404 --> 00:01:05,004
(FOOTSTEPS THUD, CABLES RATTLE)
25
00:01:07,001 --> 00:01:08,401
(RACCOON PURRS)
26
00:01:10,790 --> 00:01:13,850
Brian, check this out, man.
27
00:01:13,853 --> 00:01:17,540
Toss the cable from the
middle, all right,
28
00:01:17,543 --> 00:01:19,843
loop, loop, loop,
29
00:01:21,571 --> 00:01:22,936
this way the cable develops a memory
30
00:01:22,938 --> 00:01:24,432
and it always lies flat, okay?
31
00:01:24,434 --> 00:01:25,928
Who cares about memory, okay?
32
00:01:25,929 --> 00:01:27,264
I'm never gonna need to know this,
33
00:01:27,266 --> 00:01:29,657
how to wrap XLR's properly.
34
00:01:29,659 --> 00:01:31,622
What if I go on tour with
the new record, okay,
35
00:01:31,624 --> 00:01:33,916
and I'm lookin' for a roadie
who can wrap cables? Right?
36
00:01:33,918 --> 00:01:35,681
I'd want my brother,
man, I'd want you.
37
00:01:35,683 --> 00:01:38,105
Don't take this wrong way, but...
38
00:01:38,107 --> 00:01:41,305
I hope things don't work
out for you at Rita's
39
00:01:41,307 --> 00:01:43,868
'cause I dunno why you'd
wanna leave this place.
40
00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:47,060
Brian, I'm 28, man, I
can't live at home.
41
00:01:47,062 --> 00:01:48,656
Yeah, well, I know 28 year olds
42
00:01:48,658 --> 00:01:52,385
who are still livin'
at home, rockin' it.
43
00:01:52,388 --> 00:01:55,108
Bryce, Bryce, no calls.
44
00:01:55,110 --> 00:01:57,711
Yes, I will tell her the
tickets are booked.
45
00:01:57,713 --> 00:02:00,075
Thank you.
46
00:02:00,077 --> 00:02:02,077
- (PHONE RINGS)
- Oh hey.
47
00:02:03,966 --> 00:02:06,196
(LOW HUM OF CHATTER, KEYS CLACK)
48
00:02:08,225 --> 00:02:10,395
- (PHONE RINGS)
- Hi, Vern.
49
00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:15,941
Cynthia, I'm so sorry to
bug you about this again,
50
00:02:15,943 --> 00:02:18,135
but any luck on the jacket?
Anyone heard anything?
51
00:02:18,137 --> 00:02:19,402
No, no, no, no, Vern,
52
00:02:19,404 --> 00:02:23,002
you cannot just saunter in
here with your phone tricks
53
00:02:23,005 --> 00:02:25,197
and try to get some alone
time with Cynthia.
54
00:02:25,199 --> 00:02:28,059
Okay, you have to
remember the protocol:
55
00:02:28,061 --> 00:02:30,851
you check in with me,
we make an appointment.
56
00:02:30,853 --> 00:02:33,015
We know this, right, Vern?
57
00:02:33,017 --> 00:02:35,508
Yeah, I'm sorry, I knew that I'm...
58
00:02:35,510 --> 00:02:37,403
- It's okay.
- Just...
59
00:02:37,405 --> 00:02:39,637
Vern, I'm gonna try to help you find
60
00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:41,731
that Froot Loops jacket.
Don't worry, okay?
61
00:02:41,733 --> 00:02:43,696
And hey, if we can't find it,
62
00:02:43,698 --> 00:02:45,830
maybe we can find someone
who can make you a new one.
63
00:02:45,832 --> 00:02:47,825
Yeah, I'll make you a new one.
64
00:02:47,827 --> 00:02:50,816
No-no thanks. That's the
Froot Loops jacket I won
65
00:02:50,819 --> 00:02:52,483
at the sales conference.
66
00:02:52,484 --> 00:02:54,108
1983, Florida.
67
00:02:54,110 --> 00:02:55,813
Oh yeah, Taylor told us all about it.
68
00:02:55,815 --> 00:02:57,011
Yeah.
69
00:02:57,012 --> 00:02:59,204
You closed three cereal
markets in one weekend,
70
00:02:59,206 --> 00:03:01,398
and after the smoke
cleared, 7 million.
71
00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:03,133
I mean, everybody knows
about the famous
72
00:03:03,135 --> 00:03:05,257
- Vern 7-million-dollar weekend.
- Oh yeah.
73
00:03:05,259 --> 00:03:07,122
- Taylor told you about that?
- Yeah.
74
00:03:07,124 --> 00:03:09,785
Vern, Taylor tells
everyone about that.
75
00:03:09,787 --> 00:03:12,617
He brags about you all the time.
76
00:03:12,620 --> 00:03:13,945
Well, it was a big sale.
77
00:03:13,946 --> 00:03:16,507
Very big. And you know what,
I need to mention to you,
78
00:03:16,509 --> 00:03:18,372
I need to take next week off,
79
00:03:18,374 --> 00:03:19,698
you know, just try
to catch up with you
80
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,035
and your sales records.
81
00:03:21,037 --> 00:03:23,897
But we are gonna find your
Froot Loops jacket. Okay?
82
00:03:23,899 --> 00:03:25,692
5 days notice.
83
00:03:25,694 --> 00:03:27,557
Don't worry about the jacket.
84
00:03:27,559 --> 00:03:30,350
And uh... take the whole week off.
85
00:03:30,352 --> 00:03:32,982
- Love you, Vern!
- I love you.
86
00:03:32,984 --> 00:03:34,508
(BLOWS KISS)
87
00:03:34,510 --> 00:03:36,174
(PHONE RINGS)
88
00:03:36,175 --> 00:03:38,138
Thanks, Vern, I have a
lot of paperwork to do.
89
00:03:38,140 --> 00:03:39,803
See ya later.
90
00:03:39,805 --> 00:03:47,321
???
91
00:03:47,326 --> 00:03:50,116
DON: Hey, Dad, okay,
I got most of my stuff.
92
00:03:50,118 --> 00:03:52,210
But I'm gonna have to come
back here for a few things,
93
00:03:52,212 --> 00:03:54,882
so I'll see ya later?
94
00:03:56,341 --> 00:03:59,829
Nothin'? Just sugar pyramids? Okay.
95
00:03:59,831 --> 00:04:01,431
'K, bro.
96
00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,533
What? Okay. Uh-huh.
97
00:04:05,655 --> 00:04:09,014
Oh, that's enough, Brian.
That's enough.
98
00:04:09,017 --> 00:04:11,457
(DOORS SHUT)
99
00:04:16,536 --> 00:04:18,468
Come on with the sad faces, all right?
100
00:04:18,470 --> 00:04:21,131
I know I'm movin' out,
but this is good.
101
00:04:21,133 --> 00:04:24,352
Yeah, Rita's place is $150 a month.
102
00:04:24,355 --> 00:04:26,318
(VOICE) When can I see your new place?
103
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:27,854
I'd like to meet Rita.
104
00:04:27,855 --> 00:04:29,877
Can you give me like a few
days to get settled in,
105
00:04:29,879 --> 00:04:32,181
you know, unpack my things?
Is that cool?
106
00:04:32,183 --> 00:04:33,483
Okay.
107
00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:37,467
(DOOR CLOSES, ENGINE STARTS)
108
00:04:37,469 --> 00:04:39,601
(LOUD MUSIC PLAYS)
109
00:04:39,603 --> 00:04:41,703
(ENGINE RUMBLES)
110
00:04:43,362 --> 00:04:45,792
It's working. Do you
wanna get a Town Car?
111
00:04:48,250 --> 00:04:50,143
(VOICE) Eat one-quarter only.
112
00:04:50,145 --> 00:04:58,866
???
113
00:04:58,871 --> 00:05:01,063
Oh. (ENGINE HUMS)
114
00:05:01,065 --> 00:05:04,254
Oh, all right.
115
00:05:04,256 --> 00:05:06,388
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
116
00:05:06,390 --> 00:05:07,984
WENDY: I'll see you guys later.
117
00:05:07,986 --> 00:05:10,286
Sorry I tried to fight you
last night, Michelle.
118
00:05:11,776 --> 00:05:14,676
(HORN HONKS) Ugh, Manny!
119
00:05:14,678 --> 00:05:17,169
Where did you disappear to last night?
120
00:05:17,171 --> 00:05:19,592
One second we were watching
you dance with a hot boy,
121
00:05:19,594 --> 00:05:22,255
and the next second the hot
boy and you were gone.
122
00:05:22,257 --> 00:05:24,349
I'm a little bit of a detective,
123
00:05:24,351 --> 00:05:28,218
so I am pretty sure you
and the boy hooked up.
124
00:05:28,221 --> 00:05:30,472
- Tell me about it, please.
- Wendy, are you sitting?
125
00:05:30,474 --> 00:05:32,607
Yeah, what's up? Did you and
Dad get into more trouble
126
00:05:32,609 --> 00:05:36,994
- with the men from the woods?
- No. It's your boyfriend.
127
00:05:36,997 --> 00:05:39,199
- Is he okay?
- Uh, this is not easy, Wendy,
128
00:05:39,201 --> 00:05:40,525
but I gotta tell you, I'm your friend
129
00:05:40,527 --> 00:05:41,822
and I gotta tell you this.
130
00:05:41,823 --> 00:05:43,856
My friend Sandy did the pool
hall last night, and uh,
131
00:05:43,858 --> 00:05:47,228
she saw Darren in the washroom
makin' out with a girl.
132
00:05:48,845 --> 00:05:50,808
I have pictures but I don't
wanna send 'em to you.
133
00:05:50,810 --> 00:05:54,995
- Send me the pictures.
- Okay, I'll send them to you.
134
00:05:54,998 --> 00:05:57,038
(TEXT MESSAGE CHIMES)
135
00:05:58,628 --> 00:06:00,790
I'm really sorry.
136
00:06:00,792 --> 00:06:04,350
???
137
00:06:04,353 --> 00:06:07,293
I hate him. I really do.
138
00:06:09,608 --> 00:06:12,468
I gotta get to work, and I'll
see you later tonight, okay?
139
00:06:12,471 --> 00:06:14,711
Wendy? Can you say something, Wendy?
140
00:06:16,429 --> 00:06:19,369
- And...
- Oh, so cute!
141
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:23,249
Don't go chasin' waterfalls.
142
00:06:23,252 --> 00:06:24,945
(CAT MEOWS)
143
00:06:24,946 --> 00:06:27,776
This sticky-note colour waterfall
144
00:06:27,779 --> 00:06:32,433
celebrates Taylor's
production approval, and...
145
00:06:32,436 --> 00:06:34,076
new boxes!
146
00:06:35,567 --> 00:06:37,032
New boxes?
147
00:06:37,034 --> 00:06:39,854
Yeah. Taylor sent some
notes to production.
148
00:06:39,856 --> 00:06:42,257
I didn't see them,
you didn't see them.
149
00:06:42,259 --> 00:06:46,046
So, yeah, we lost the
see-through packaging,
150
00:06:46,049 --> 00:06:49,338
and they kind of um... how do you say,
151
00:06:49,341 --> 00:06:51,742
- re-worked the box?
- Well, you know what?
152
00:06:51,744 --> 00:06:55,032
It is the first mega cereal,
153
00:06:55,034 --> 00:06:57,526
and we are bringin' toys
back, Shel-bellers.
154
00:06:57,528 --> 00:06:58,962
Yup, we are.
155
00:06:58,964 --> 00:07:02,851
Collaboration means working
with other people. Teamwork.
156
00:07:02,854 --> 00:07:05,046
- Team...
- BOTH: work.
157
00:07:05,048 --> 00:07:08,446
- I'd rock a tea right now, Shel.
- Yes, right away.
158
00:07:08,448 --> 00:07:11,507
(RACCOON CHIRPS)
159
00:07:11,510 --> 00:07:12,964
DON: Hi, pretty, girl.
160
00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:16,365
Oh come on, come on down. Yeah?
161
00:07:16,367 --> 00:07:17,897
(RACCOON CHIRPS)
162
00:07:20,685 --> 00:07:22,488
There we go.
163
00:07:22,490 --> 00:07:32,198
???
164
00:07:32,203 --> 00:07:33,797
(RACCOON CHIRPS)
165
00:07:33,799 --> 00:07:35,961
Good girl.
166
00:07:35,963 --> 00:07:38,325
(RACCOON PURRS)
167
00:07:38,327 --> 00:07:41,117
WOMAN: What? How did you do that?
168
00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,581
It's just experience, you know.
169
00:07:43,583 --> 00:07:46,642
- Thank you so, so much.
- No problem.
170
00:07:46,644 --> 00:07:48,238
So hard to get in touch with you guys.
171
00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:49,734
I know my phone's ringin' like crazy,
172
00:07:49,735 --> 00:07:51,369
these raccoons are runnin'
a racket up in this city,
173
00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:53,434
- you know what I mean?
- I'll say. Yeah.
174
00:07:53,436 --> 00:07:55,857
If you look, I meshed
up the fence here,
175
00:07:55,859 --> 00:07:58,290
all along the sides, so
this is guaranteed work.
176
00:07:58,292 --> 00:08:03,275
- Great. How much?
- Um, 3 raccoons is $480?
177
00:08:03,279 --> 00:08:05,282
$480, okay. (RACCOON CHIRPS)
178
00:08:05,284 --> 00:08:09,739
BRIAN: North is that way.
Where-where is he?
179
00:08:09,742 --> 00:08:11,942
- (RACCOON CHIRPS)
- It's okay, okay.
180
00:08:12,863 --> 00:08:14,895
Thank you. Just slip
that in my pocket?
181
00:08:14,897 --> 00:08:16,561
- Oh sure.
- Thank you.
182
00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:19,124
BRIAN: Hey! Hey!
183
00:08:19,126 --> 00:08:20,620
DON: Could you just
give me one second?
184
00:08:20,622 --> 00:08:22,246
- Uh, sure.
- I'm sorry.
185
00:08:22,247 --> 00:08:23,811
Okay.
186
00:08:23,813 --> 00:08:27,201
Dummies, what are you...
what are you doing here?
187
00:08:27,204 --> 00:08:28,908
BRIAN: What? We tracked you here.
188
00:08:28,910 --> 00:08:30,972
- What?
- Yeah, in the hood.
189
00:08:30,974 --> 00:08:33,027
Tracking device. You
know, in your hoodie.
190
00:08:33,028 --> 00:08:35,060
You know, when I came in for that hug?
191
00:08:35,062 --> 00:08:37,562
You live here?
Let us see your apartment.
192
00:08:39,490 --> 00:08:42,749
Come on, what is wrong with you two?
193
00:08:42,752 --> 00:08:44,206
Are you worried about me, Dad?
194
00:08:44,208 --> 00:08:46,141
Because look at me, I'm fine.
195
00:08:46,143 --> 00:08:49,613
All right? You two are not okay.
196
00:08:50,271 --> 00:08:53,390
Are you... you're high.
You guys are high.
197
00:08:53,393 --> 00:08:54,927
You guys are drivin' around
in Mom's car service
198
00:08:54,929 --> 00:08:56,992
gettin' high on marijuana
coconut butter
199
00:08:56,994 --> 00:09:00,452
with your son, Dad?
Brian, what about you?
200
00:09:00,454 --> 00:09:02,077
What are you gonna do,
are you gonna get a job?
201
00:09:02,079 --> 00:09:03,673
You gonna do something?
202
00:09:03,675 --> 00:09:05,877
Just gonna get high
with the old man? Hmm.
203
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,370
Okay, look, you think getting a job
204
00:09:08,372 --> 00:09:10,335
and moving out of the
house is everything?
205
00:09:10,337 --> 00:09:12,459
It's not gonna solve
all your problems.
206
00:09:12,461 --> 00:09:13,995
You two, go home!
207
00:09:13,996 --> 00:09:18,366
- Ah, crap. Oh, Shel?
- What is it?
208
00:09:19,951 --> 00:09:21,981
Uh, I knew it, I knew it.
209
00:09:24,079 --> 00:09:28,909
Oh dear, poor Wenners.
That guy's super gross.
210
00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:32,803
Okay, uh... come on, Wenners.
211
00:09:37,523 --> 00:09:40,553
Wendy? Wendy. Wendy, are you okay?
212
00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:45,169
I'm fine. I mean I would've
married that idiot,
213
00:09:45,172 --> 00:09:48,969
and now I'm gonna be alone
forever, but I'm fine.
214
00:09:48,972 --> 00:09:51,124
Are you eating pizza right now?
215
00:09:51,126 --> 00:09:54,285
No, no I am not eating pizza.
216
00:09:54,287 --> 00:09:55,891
Okay, I only ask, it's no big deal,
217
00:09:55,893 --> 00:09:58,215
only because you asked
me to remind you
218
00:09:58,217 --> 00:10:00,578
since you tend to eat pizza
when you're really freaked out.
219
00:10:00,580 --> 00:10:04,906
Yeah, that's why I am not
eating any pizza right.
220
00:10:04,909 --> 00:10:07,200
Okay, Wendy, I just,
I want you to drop
221
00:10:07,202 --> 00:10:08,896
what you're doin' right now,
222
00:10:08,898 --> 00:10:12,426
and I'll send a Town Car,
and come to work, okay,
223
00:10:12,428 --> 00:10:13,593
come to my office.
224
00:10:13,595 --> 00:10:15,657
Is it okay if I visit
you at the office?
225
00:10:15,659 --> 00:10:17,682
Because Shellers is usually
pretty weird with me.
226
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:20,972
Wendy, family first, okay, I
would love to see you now.
227
00:10:20,974 --> 00:10:22,578
Please come over, we'll talk.
228
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:25,470
- I'm sending a car right now.
- Okay.
229
00:10:25,472 --> 00:10:27,542
(WIPES OFF PIZZA)
230
00:10:36,083 --> 00:10:37,578
SECURITY: Uh, excuse me...
231
00:10:37,580 --> 00:10:39,243
No actually I won't get wanded,
232
00:10:39,245 --> 00:10:41,547
I don't feel like it, so take
out your guns and shoot me
233
00:10:41,549 --> 00:10:44,140
if you don't want me to
go to my mom's, okay?
234
00:10:44,142 --> 00:10:47,729
Okay. You boys have a great day, okay?
235
00:10:47,732 --> 00:10:51,061
Just kidding, I don't care.
236
00:10:51,063 --> 00:10:53,683
SHELLERS: Yes, both cats live
full-time at the office.
237
00:10:53,685 --> 00:10:55,190
We'd like the vet to
come here if possible
238
00:10:55,192 --> 00:10:57,085
for their regular dental check-up?
239
00:10:57,087 --> 00:10:58,651
Great, I'll send a Town Car.
240
00:10:58,653 --> 00:11:00,207
Did you have a big
lunch, or somethin'?
241
00:11:00,208 --> 00:11:02,469
- Can I help you?
- What kind of pink is that?
242
00:11:02,471 --> 00:11:05,601
It's Rockaberry Fruit pink.
Cynthia's favourite.
243
00:11:05,604 --> 00:11:07,796
- Yeah, okay.
- Wow, okay.
244
00:11:07,798 --> 00:11:09,930
Please just wear this pass.
245
00:11:09,932 --> 00:11:12,862
- Okey dokey.
- Great. Seriously?
246
00:11:13,991 --> 00:11:16,191
(BASKETS THUD)
247
00:11:17,251 --> 00:11:18,751
(DOOR CLOSES)
248
00:11:22,338 --> 00:11:24,078
(PHONE RINGS)
249
00:11:25,140 --> 00:11:27,700
Hey, Brian? Look dude...
250
00:11:29,199 --> 00:11:31,222
Yeah, I'm sorry that I freaked
at you guys earlier, all right,
251
00:11:31,224 --> 00:11:34,353
you just can't follow me around
at my job, okay, just...
252
00:11:34,355 --> 00:11:36,916
(SIGHS)
253
00:11:36,918 --> 00:11:38,442
Where are you guys?
254
00:11:38,444 --> 00:11:40,144
(DOOR OPENS, CLOSES)
255
00:11:41,505 --> 00:11:42,805
Hi.
256
00:11:44,508 --> 00:11:46,760
I'm still mad at you
guys for tracking me.
257
00:11:46,762 --> 00:11:50,419
Look, Don, I-I'm sorry for
putting the GPS on you,
258
00:11:50,422 --> 00:11:52,684
but Dad is especially sorry
259
00:11:52,686 --> 00:11:55,226
for making you feel like
you had to move out.
260
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,876
No. Look, all right.
261
00:11:58,878 --> 00:12:00,801
It is not about that.
262
00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:02,636
This is about me.
263
00:12:02,638 --> 00:12:05,966
What is up with you guys and
having me have to live at home?
264
00:12:05,969 --> 00:12:07,962
All right? You're gonna see me.
265
00:12:07,964 --> 00:12:09,987
You're gonna see me all the time.
266
00:12:09,989 --> 00:12:12,888
Dad, okay,
267
00:12:12,890 --> 00:12:16,578
I think I got somethin'
that might cheer you up.
268
00:12:16,581 --> 00:12:19,710
This is $3,200 dollars, cash.
269
00:12:19,712 --> 00:12:22,602
It's everything I owe you.
We're square now.
270
00:12:22,604 --> 00:12:23,974
Come on!
271
00:12:26,164 --> 00:12:29,224
(VOICE) What's so special
about this girl's apartment?
272
00:12:29,226 --> 00:12:32,155
It's cheap, and it's cool,
and it's weird, man.
273
00:12:32,158 --> 00:12:34,619
Well, so is living at home.
274
00:12:34,621 --> 00:12:36,981
Rita and I have a lot in common.
275
00:12:38,381 --> 00:12:40,105
(VOICE) Like you and Manny?
276
00:12:40,106 --> 00:12:41,570
No, Dad, not like me and Manny.
277
00:12:41,572 --> 00:12:43,196
Rita is on her own path.
278
00:12:43,198 --> 00:12:46,796
She's an animal activist,
she's saving raccoons,
279
00:12:46,799 --> 00:12:49,858
she's crazy smart,
she quit med school.
280
00:12:49,860 --> 00:12:51,254
Do you wanna meet her?
281
00:12:51,256 --> 00:12:53,080
God, I'm so sorry.
282
00:12:53,081 --> 00:12:56,180
Darren's just such a total
dirt bag. I mean...
283
00:12:56,183 --> 00:12:59,142
Maybe we should just like
do the open cheating thing
284
00:12:59,144 --> 00:13:00,639
that you and Dad do.
285
00:13:00,641 --> 00:13:02,833
Oh, but Wendy, no, no, not
the same thing, okay.
286
00:13:02,835 --> 00:13:04,429
Cheating is deception,
and your father and I
287
00:13:04,431 --> 00:13:05,725
don't deceive each other.
288
00:13:05,726 --> 00:13:07,719
When your father asked
me to marry him,
289
00:13:07,721 --> 00:13:09,784
I suggested that we have
an understanding, okay,
290
00:13:09,786 --> 00:13:12,346
and God knows your Dad had
understandings of his own.
291
00:13:12,348 --> 00:13:14,680
Okay, no, I don't need
to know about that.
292
00:13:14,682 --> 00:13:17,701
Ugh, just... just say polyamory.
293
00:13:17,704 --> 00:13:19,408
But that would imply that
I love other people,
294
00:13:19,410 --> 00:13:21,801
but I don't.
Wendy, I just love your Dad.
295
00:13:21,803 --> 00:13:24,225
So, you don't love Bryce?
296
00:13:24,227 --> 00:13:27,924
Oh, are you kidding? My... no.
297
00:13:27,927 --> 00:13:30,687
Okay, Bryce is a nice guy,
he's a friend, right.
298
00:13:30,689 --> 00:13:34,277
I... he likes hiking, and low
carbs, and taquitos, you know,
299
00:13:34,279 --> 00:13:37,579
but no he uh, he also
looks like a model.
300
00:13:39,236 --> 00:13:41,767
Oh my God! Oh mom, don't show
me that. That's weird, but...
301
00:13:41,769 --> 00:13:43,761
Come on. See what I'm saying?
302
00:13:43,763 --> 00:13:45,726
Congratulations, wow.
303
00:13:45,728 --> 00:13:47,352
But don't show me... oh wow.
304
00:13:47,354 --> 00:13:49,656
So you know what I'm saying here,
305
00:13:49,658 --> 00:13:53,016
it's okay to date the
crazy guys. I get it.
306
00:13:53,018 --> 00:13:55,609
But only for like 5 minutes,
307
00:13:55,611 --> 00:13:59,168
and then just run before
you start screaming, okay?
308
00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:01,902
Don't stick with the dumb ones.
Not worth it.
309
00:14:01,904 --> 00:14:03,857
Yeah, you're right. I can do better.
310
00:14:03,859 --> 00:14:05,861
Oh my gosh, yes, you're a total catch.
311
00:14:05,863 --> 00:14:08,324
Thank you. I just wish
people said that more.
312
00:14:08,326 --> 00:14:10,688
Come to me. I will tell
you what a catch you are.
313
00:14:10,690 --> 00:14:12,812
I mean you're my Mom,
so it should be a dude,
314
00:14:12,814 --> 00:14:14,478
but I like the sentiment.
315
00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:16,343
Show me that pic again?
316
00:14:16,345 --> 00:14:18,367
Sports therapist.
317
00:14:18,369 --> 00:14:19,933
Hey, take the car all afternoon,
318
00:14:19,935 --> 00:14:22,596
go and clear your head. I love you.
319
00:14:22,598 --> 00:14:24,361
I'm gonna be fine.
320
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:27,024
? I know everything you need ?
321
00:14:27,026 --> 00:14:28,221
It's gonna be fine.
322
00:14:28,222 --> 00:14:30,783
???
323
00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:33,945
- ? Even secrets that
you keep ? - (HEY BOY)
324
00:14:33,947 --> 00:14:37,435
Okay, we are going to make two stops.
325
00:14:37,438 --> 00:14:39,729
Number one, a liquor
store, number two,
326
00:14:39,731 --> 00:14:42,362
- I have a different idea.
- Yes, ma'am.
327
00:14:42,364 --> 00:14:44,656
? Your desires I will meet ?
328
00:14:44,658 --> 00:14:47,916
? Hey boy, hey boy ?
329
00:14:47,918 --> 00:14:50,618
? I know everything you need ?
330
00:14:52,915 --> 00:14:54,480
DON: Okay, guys, check it out.
331
00:14:54,481 --> 00:14:56,832
Uh, Rita, she's very cool, very chill.
332
00:14:56,835 --> 00:14:59,197
Um, but there's a couple ground rules.
333
00:14:59,199 --> 00:15:02,058
Brian, speak when spoken to;
Dad, do not touch anything.
334
00:15:02,060 --> 00:15:04,262
And I will come and get
you when she is ready.
335
00:15:04,264 --> 00:15:06,157
Please stay here.
336
00:15:06,159 --> 00:15:07,783
(FOOTSTEPS THUD)
337
00:15:07,785 --> 00:15:09,425
(BEADS RUSTLE)
338
00:15:10,348 --> 00:15:14,404
- Hey, Rita? Rita? Coffee?
- Yes, thank God.
339
00:15:14,407 --> 00:15:16,769
Yes, that's from my Dad, he's
here with Brian, my brother,
340
00:15:16,771 --> 00:15:19,730
- you met Brian.
- What? No visitors.
341
00:15:19,732 --> 00:15:23,402
- Hi.
- Uh, hey guys, come on in.
342
00:15:25,626 --> 00:15:28,187
So Rita, this is my Dad, Owen.
343
00:15:28,189 --> 00:15:30,012
Thanks for the coffee.
344
00:15:30,014 --> 00:15:32,184
Sorry there's not
really anywhere to sit.
345
00:15:34,971 --> 00:15:36,664
Yeah, I don't really
get a lot of visitors,
346
00:15:36,666 --> 00:15:38,430
and I've asked not to
be interrupted by any.
347
00:15:38,432 --> 00:15:43,026
You know, I kinda like this
box stuff. It's really cool.
348
00:15:43,029 --> 00:15:46,487
Yeah uh, this work is not
ready to be seen, or shared.
349
00:15:46,489 --> 00:15:48,389
Yeah, yeah.
350
00:15:52,044 --> 00:15:53,768
(VOICE) What are you working on?
351
00:15:53,770 --> 00:15:55,872
What am I working on?
What are you working on?
352
00:15:55,874 --> 00:15:58,794
I just told you that my work is
not ready to be seen or shared,
353
00:15:58,796 --> 00:16:00,400
and you don't seem to get that,
354
00:16:00,402 --> 00:16:02,524
which leads me back to
your dumb son, Don.
355
00:16:02,526 --> 00:16:04,260
Why are you bringing
random civilian meatheads
356
00:16:04,262 --> 00:16:06,354
into my apartment, and why are
these random civilian meatheads
357
00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:08,847
interrogating me? You're on thin ice.
358
00:16:08,849 --> 00:16:10,712
You pay $150 bucks a month, man,
359
00:16:10,714 --> 00:16:13,275
this is total DS, dumb shit.
360
00:16:13,277 --> 00:16:16,366
You got that, Pops? DS, dumb shit.
361
00:16:16,368 --> 00:16:18,600
You know, the vibe in
here was really good,
362
00:16:18,602 --> 00:16:20,764
and then she said all
that crazy stuff.
363
00:16:20,766 --> 00:16:22,866
Ew, get your nerd-crush eyes off me.
364
00:16:25,084 --> 00:16:27,177
Okay, you, it's time to go.
365
00:16:27,179 --> 00:16:29,012
This is exactly what I
didn't want to happen.
366
00:16:29,014 --> 00:16:31,276
Nerd-crush eyes, speak when spoken to,
367
00:16:31,278 --> 00:16:33,001
don't touch anything.
368
00:16:33,003 --> 00:16:35,803
What a super group you
two make. Full fail.
369
00:16:35,805 --> 00:16:37,465
Let's go.
370
00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:42,433
(BEADS RATTLE)
371
00:16:46,716 --> 00:16:49,077
Dad, I've moved out.
372
00:16:49,079 --> 00:16:51,311
I'm sorry, you gotta get over it.
373
00:16:51,313 --> 00:16:58,858
???
374
00:16:58,863 --> 00:17:00,925
(BEADS RATTLE)
375
00:17:00,927 --> 00:17:11,104
???
376
00:17:11,110 --> 00:17:12,674
(RACCOON CHIRPS)
377
00:17:12,675 --> 00:17:15,335
? I know everything you need ?
378
00:17:15,337 --> 00:17:17,729
? (I know, I know) ?
379
00:17:17,732 --> 00:17:20,323
? Even secrets that you keep ?
380
00:17:20,325 --> 00:17:22,257
Hmm, there's his car.
381
00:17:22,259 --> 00:17:24,721
? (Hey boy, hey boy) ?
382
00:17:24,723 --> 00:17:27,343
? You can always count on me ?
383
00:17:27,345 --> 00:17:30,036
? (On me, on me) ?
384
00:17:30,038 --> 00:17:33,097
? Your desires I will meet ?
(HEY BOY)
385
00:17:33,100 --> 00:17:35,710
Take 5, I might be a while.
386
00:17:37,797 --> 00:17:39,727
(TURNS ENGINE OFF,
DOORS OPEN AND CLOSE)
387
00:17:42,953 --> 00:17:45,284
(ALCOHOL SLOSHES, FOOTSTEPS THUD)
388
00:17:45,286 --> 00:17:48,645
Hey, Darren, see you've
taken up smoking again!
389
00:17:48,648 --> 00:17:50,869
Guess the science is
still out on that, hey?
390
00:17:50,871 --> 00:17:52,107
I know what this looks like,
391
00:17:52,108 --> 00:17:54,001
and this is not what you
think it looks like.
392
00:17:54,003 --> 00:17:56,992
This is humiliating.
How could you do this to me?
393
00:17:56,995 --> 00:17:59,127
Do what to you? I mean
we were just talking.
394
00:17:59,129 --> 00:18:01,092
We were just talking in
her house over there.
395
00:18:01,094 --> 00:18:03,286
She's going through some stuff,
and I'm being a good friend.
396
00:18:03,288 --> 00:18:04,653
I'm helping.
397
00:18:04,654 --> 00:18:07,613
Okay, this is all a
surprise to me. I'm out.
398
00:18:07,616 --> 00:18:09,270
We got drunk a couple times.
399
00:18:09,271 --> 00:18:11,204
I do not care about your husband,
400
00:18:11,206 --> 00:18:13,099
he didn't even mention he had a wife.
401
00:18:13,101 --> 00:18:16,060
(SIGHS) I'm not his wife,
but I am his present,
402
00:18:16,062 --> 00:18:17,557
and long-time, girlfriend.
403
00:18:17,559 --> 00:18:20,090
So, did you sleep with my boyfriend?
404
00:18:20,092 --> 00:18:21,685
Wendy, don't ask that question.
405
00:18:21,687 --> 00:18:25,757
- Darren, shut up.
- I did. I'm so sorry.
406
00:18:27,283 --> 00:18:29,873
- (STOMPS AWAY)
- You're really beautiful.
407
00:18:29,875 --> 00:18:32,545
(STOMPS QUICKLY, OPENS DOOR)
408
00:18:36,328 --> 00:18:39,118
Can you just drive please?
409
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,651
Oh my God, what is even happening?
410
00:18:41,653 --> 00:18:44,044
(OPENS DOOR)
411
00:18:44,046 --> 00:18:45,840
PATRICIA: What are you
waiting for, you asshole,
412
00:18:45,842 --> 00:18:48,502
- go after your wife.
- She's not my wife.
413
00:18:48,504 --> 00:18:50,766
She's not my wife.
414
00:18:50,769 --> 00:18:52,463
(WENDY SCREAMING AND CRYING)
415
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:53,798
DARREN: Patricia, wait!
Just hold on, wait!
416
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,122
No... Wendy! Patricia!
417
00:18:56,124 --> 00:18:58,127
I need the keys they're in the fridge,
418
00:18:58,129 --> 00:19:00,590
on top of the fridge
in the kitchen. Ah!
419
00:19:00,592 --> 00:19:02,216
- Wendy!
- (BOTTLE SHATTERS)
420
00:19:02,218 --> 00:19:03,818
Oh fuck, man!
421
00:19:14,794 --> 00:19:16,994
(CAR RUMBLES UP)
422
00:19:19,750 --> 00:19:21,553
(DOOR OPENS)
423
00:19:21,555 --> 00:19:23,308
- Hey, Mom!
- Hey, Brian.
424
00:19:23,310 --> 00:19:25,512
- I'll take that.
- Thank you.
425
00:19:25,514 --> 00:19:28,374
- Hey, Wendy!
- Hmm, Wendy...
426
00:19:31,537 --> 00:19:34,167
- What's up?
- Darren cheated on her.
427
00:19:36,355 --> 00:19:38,019
(CAR RUMBLES AWAY)
428
00:19:38,020 --> 00:19:41,478
I caught him! I caught him.
429
00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:43,842
(STOMPS)
430
00:19:43,844 --> 00:19:47,342
Oh God, Wenners, you're...
431
00:19:47,345 --> 00:19:49,567
Oh Wenners. Wenners!
432
00:19:49,569 --> 00:19:51,462
(DOOR SLAMS)
433
00:19:51,464 --> 00:19:53,934
(LOUD ROCK MUSIC)
434
00:19:55,462 --> 00:19:57,862
(TIRES SCREECH)
435
00:20:02,783 --> 00:20:05,913
(SHUTS ENGINE OFF)
436
00:20:07,639 --> 00:20:09,203
- DARREN: Owen!
- (DOOR SLAMS)
437
00:20:09,205 --> 00:20:12,235
I need to talk to
Wendy, is she in there?
438
00:20:13,265 --> 00:20:15,855
Owen, hey! Listen, I don't
need to talk to you,
439
00:20:15,857 --> 00:20:17,750
I don't need to talk
to any of you guys.
440
00:20:17,752 --> 00:20:20,782
(SIGHS) Uh, okay.
Here's what's gonna happen.
441
00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:22,507
I'm gonna on the side of you here,
442
00:20:22,509 --> 00:20:24,442
I'm gonna walk inside your house,
443
00:20:24,444 --> 00:20:27,334
I'm gonna apologize to
your daughter. Okay?
444
00:20:27,336 --> 00:20:29,936
We can do this one of two ways.
445
00:20:32,332 --> 00:20:35,890
The easy way, or the hard way.
446
00:20:35,893 --> 00:20:37,616
Okay?
447
00:20:37,618 --> 00:20:40,188
Oh... Owen.
448
00:20:42,814 --> 00:20:45,614
That's too bad for you.
449
00:20:47,241 --> 00:20:49,164
Oh yeah, you're gonna choke me out.
450
00:20:49,166 --> 00:20:50,661
Real original, man.
451
00:20:50,663 --> 00:20:53,363
Yeah well, guess what, I've
been choked out before, Owen,
452
00:20:53,365 --> 00:20:56,825
and I'm pretty sure
you're doin' it wrong.
453
00:20:58,621 --> 00:21:00,581
(BODY THUDS)
454
00:21:01,742 --> 00:21:04,702
- He's still breathin' right?
- He's fine.
455
00:21:04,704 --> 00:21:06,198
Take him home, Brian.
456
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:08,000
- Hell yeah.
- (TRUNK CLOSES)
457
00:21:08,050 --> 00:21:12,600
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