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1
00:00:50,355 --> 00:00:53,567
- Holy mother of Jesus in a tank!
- Oh, man.
2
00:00:53,650 --> 00:00:56,070
God. Sorry. I'm sorry.
3
00:00:56,153 --> 00:00:57,696
Oh, don't do that!
4
00:00:57,780 --> 00:01:00,532
Put some taps on your feet
so I can hear you coming.
5
00:01:00,616 --> 00:01:04,120
Well, you saw me last night. I'm
kinda surprised you're surprised.
6
00:01:04,203 --> 00:01:09,125
It's still shocking to find you
standing here in the cold light of day.
7
00:01:09,208 --> 00:01:11,001
Every day.
8
00:01:11,085 --> 00:01:14,338
Every... single... day.
9
00:01:14,421 --> 00:01:16,423
I'm here a lot, huh?
10
00:01:16,506 --> 00:01:20,094
Sure, have a deviled egg. Somebody
in my class can do without.
11
00:01:21,887 --> 00:01:24,514
I'm sorry. I tell you what I'm gonna do.
12
00:01:24,598 --> 00:01:28,477
I'm gonna stop by Maudie's and
get you a dozen mini quiches,
13
00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:32,982
- 'cause I know you're a vegetarian.
- Thank you. I appreciate that.
14
00:01:35,192 --> 00:01:39,363
Oh, no! Where's my cantaloupe I
cut up for my class last night?
15
00:01:39,446 --> 00:01:41,365
Don't look at me.
16
00:01:41,448 --> 00:01:43,617
Oh, wait. You might wanna look at me.
17
00:01:45,286 --> 00:01:47,163
Might be my Ambien eating.
18
00:01:47,246 --> 00:01:49,039
Isn't it supposed to be Ambien sleeping?
19
00:01:49,123 --> 00:01:51,583
No, it's great, I
sleep... I also Ambien eat.
20
00:01:51,667 --> 00:01:54,211
I also order shoes online.
21
00:01:54,295 --> 00:01:57,673
I got these on Ambien. Four times.
22
00:01:59,716 --> 00:02:02,511
- I'll pick you up at seven for sushi.
- See you then.
23
00:02:02,594 --> 00:02:06,223
And I'll get you those mini
quiches and a cantaloupe.
24
00:02:09,018 --> 00:02:11,687
I'm gonna have to put a lock
on the refrigerator door.
25
00:02:11,770 --> 00:02:14,982
Why? He's only here at
night. And in the morning.
26
00:02:15,065 --> 00:02:16,733
Sometimes in the afternoon.
27
00:02:16,817 --> 00:02:19,987
Yeah, his grazing hours.
He's like a water buffalo.
28
00:02:20,070 --> 00:02:23,366
I just never know when
he's gonna pop up somewhere.
29
00:02:23,448 --> 00:02:27,328
And sometimes I like to
walk around without a bra.
30
00:02:27,411 --> 00:02:30,747
Or shirt. Or pants.
31
00:02:30,831 --> 00:02:33,583
Don't you think you're going
too fast with this guy, Guy?
32
00:02:33,667 --> 00:02:35,669
Are you ever gonna get tired of that joke?
33
00:02:35,752 --> 00:02:37,421
No, no.
34
00:02:37,504 --> 00:02:41,133
You know, at my age, I only
have one speed. Break-neck.
35
00:02:41,217 --> 00:02:44,594
Of course, I don't call it that.
Because it is a very real fear.
36
00:02:44,678 --> 00:02:48,724
But you're going away with him.
You just signed the divorce papers.
37
00:02:48,807 --> 00:02:51,018
Before jumping in with both feet,
38
00:02:51,101 --> 00:02:56,523
don't you wanna find out if this is
just a rebound with this guy, Guy?
39
00:02:56,606 --> 00:02:58,734
- I am getting tired of it.
- You know, maybe it started off
40
00:02:58,817 --> 00:03:03,072
as a rebound thing, but...
what's wrong with him?
41
00:03:03,155 --> 00:03:04,990
No, I mean, tell me, what's wrong with him?
42
00:03:05,074 --> 00:03:07,743
Well, we know he Ambien eats,
what else are we gonna find out?
43
00:03:07,826 --> 00:03:12,789
He ate his friend. I mean, we do know
a fair bit about the darker side of Guy.
44
00:03:12,873 --> 00:03:15,625
- How much worse can it get?
- Touch�.
45
00:03:15,709 --> 00:03:20,505
And you know what else? It doesn't
matter. I am so lucky to have somebody.
46
00:03:20,589 --> 00:03:22,507
Do you know what most women
our age are dealing with
47
00:03:22,591 --> 00:03:24,468
besides sagging breasts and chin hairs?
48
00:03:24,551 --> 00:03:29,056
Men who date younger women because they
don't have sagging breasts and chin hairs.
49
00:03:29,139 --> 00:03:32,017
- Are you trying to tell me something?
- Yes.
50
00:03:32,101 --> 00:03:34,270
That I have somebody that
doesn't care about that stuff.
51
00:03:34,353 --> 00:03:38,023
He appreciates my maturity and my wisdom.
52
00:03:38,107 --> 00:03:40,359
Well, fine. Do what you want.
53
00:03:40,443 --> 00:03:43,904
But your boyfriend owes me $900 in cheese.
54
00:03:45,989 --> 00:03:47,699
I feel dirty.
55
00:03:47,783 --> 00:03:50,869
Look, Jeff and Peter are letting
us taste their appetizers.
56
00:03:50,953 --> 00:03:53,122
That's all. No one's
making any commitments.
57
00:03:53,205 --> 00:03:55,082
But we should tell Diane that we're tasting
58
00:03:55,165 --> 00:03:57,876
other people's appetizers for our wedding.
59
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,128
Caterers talk.
60
00:03:59,211 --> 00:04:02,589
We're just tasting! It's all above board.
61
00:04:02,672 --> 00:04:04,716
But be honest. It's a slippery slope.
62
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:07,219
If we like what we taste,
we'll make promises.
63
00:04:07,303 --> 00:04:09,805
And then we'll sneak
around behind Diane's back
64
00:04:09,888 --> 00:04:11,932
until we find the courage
to tell her it's over.
65
00:04:12,015 --> 00:04:15,519
It'll be the last 20 years all
over again! With crab cakes!
66
00:04:17,604 --> 00:04:19,189
Sol, I'm answering the door.
67
00:04:20,441 --> 00:04:24,069
And if we love Jeff and Peter's
appetizers more than Diane's,
68
00:04:24,153 --> 00:04:27,281
- then I will call her myself.
- Yes, you will.
69
00:04:27,364 --> 00:04:30,867
- But do you think she'll still like us?
- No, but we have enough friends.
70
00:04:36,248 --> 00:04:39,626
I have fond memories of this doorway.
71
00:04:39,709 --> 00:04:42,879
Ohh.
72
00:04:42,963 --> 00:04:46,383
Oh. Well, just so you know, I, uh...
73
00:04:46,467 --> 00:04:50,179
I... I... I met a man actually.
74
00:04:50,262 --> 00:04:53,765
He's-he's a boyfriend. My boyfriend.
75
00:04:53,849 --> 00:04:56,852
You know, we had that talk,
and-and... you know, it's very...
76
00:04:56,935 --> 00:04:59,104
we're-we're-we're
committed.
77
00:04:59,188 --> 00:05:03,567
I'm happy for you. I just
came down to say goodbye.
78
00:05:03,650 --> 00:05:05,486
- Oh, you're...
- Leaving.
79
00:05:07,321 --> 00:05:11,033
I'll be keeping a low profile.
Very low. Won't be reachable.
80
00:05:11,116 --> 00:05:14,578
- Where you going?
- A bit south.
81
00:05:14,661 --> 00:05:18,207
Of San Diego? That's... Mexico.
82
00:05:21,668 --> 00:05:25,506
I'm happy that a man appreciates
you. You should be savored.
83
00:05:47,570 --> 00:05:49,613
Whoa.
84
00:05:49,696 --> 00:05:52,699
- Christ in a cab!
- Oh, God! You didn't see anything.
85
00:05:52,782 --> 00:05:57,580
Oh, really? It's my hearing that
sucks. My vision is just fine.
86
00:05:57,662 --> 00:06:00,916
- Don't look at me!
- That is my student, Grace!
87
00:06:00,999 --> 00:06:03,752
- It was nothing.
- It's completely inappropriate,
88
00:06:03,835 --> 00:06:05,670
practically sexual harassment.
89
00:06:05,754 --> 00:06:08,257
What are you talking
about? He's a grown man.
90
00:06:08,340 --> 00:06:11,009
Are there others? Did you go
after Tito? How about Homer?
91
00:06:11,093 --> 00:06:12,428
It's my job to protect them!
92
00:06:12,511 --> 00:06:15,055
It was just a little... goodbye kiss.
93
00:06:15,138 --> 00:06:18,183
Goodbye? When was hello?
94
00:06:19,393 --> 00:06:21,228
It was the day of the earthquake.
95
00:06:21,311 --> 00:06:25,148
- What is happening in this house?
- I don't know.
96
00:06:25,232 --> 00:06:28,277
Your boyfriend, who you're
practically marrying, just left here.
97
00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:30,070
First of all, nobody's getting married,
98
00:06:30,153 --> 00:06:33,282
and second of all, I didn't
kiss Byron, he kissed me.
99
00:06:33,365 --> 00:06:37,869
- What about the first time?
- That one I might have participated in.
100
00:06:37,953 --> 00:06:41,248
- Why didn't you tell me?
- Honestly?
101
00:06:42,291 --> 00:06:43,626
It never occurred to me.
102
00:06:43,708 --> 00:06:47,463
I mean, I didn't think we were friends
that told each other things like that.
103
00:06:47,546 --> 00:06:49,298
Oh, you didn't.
104
00:06:49,381 --> 00:06:52,468
Well, no, not at the time.
105
00:06:52,551 --> 00:06:53,885
Why, did you?
106
00:06:55,053 --> 00:06:57,806
Not really.
107
00:06:57,889 --> 00:07:00,559
What about now? Are we
friends like that yet?
108
00:07:00,643 --> 00:07:05,397
- Are we?
- I don't know.
109
00:07:05,481 --> 00:07:10,110
But I'll... I'll make some tea and
you're gonna tell me everything.
110
00:07:11,445 --> 00:07:14,406
I haven't told a living soul about this.
111
00:07:14,490 --> 00:07:19,244
I'm so honored. Okay, spill it, sister.
112
00:07:20,787 --> 00:07:25,083
I came home, God knows where you were,
and there was a man in the kitchen.
113
00:07:25,167 --> 00:07:27,544
- Byron.
- Yeah, he was sitting right there
114
00:07:27,628 --> 00:07:30,380
- eating a ham sandwich.
- Oh, he loves ham.
115
00:07:30,464 --> 00:07:32,591
I have to admit, he is a looker.
116
00:07:32,675 --> 00:07:37,721
I would not want to sexualize a
student, but you're welcome to, go ahead.
117
00:07:37,804 --> 00:07:41,224
His eyes are really intoxicating.
118
00:07:41,308 --> 00:07:44,186
- Newman-esque, am I right?
- A young Robert Shaw.
119
00:07:44,269 --> 00:07:46,146
- Oh, yes! That's it.
- Yeah?
120
00:07:46,229 --> 00:07:49,608
"The trouble with the shark
is he's got lifeless eyes.
121
00:07:49,692 --> 00:07:52,819
Black eyes like a doll's eyes."
122
00:07:52,902 --> 00:07:55,572
"You
got city hands, Mr. Hooper."
123
00:07:55,656 --> 00:07:59,117
Not so much.
Just tell me the story.
124
00:07:59,201 --> 00:08:03,121
It was daytime, and I
had picked up the mail...
125
00:08:06,833 --> 00:08:08,669
Hi, what are you doing?
126
00:08:08,752 --> 00:08:13,048
Oh, my God, Frankie, it's crazy
here. There's food everywhere.
127
00:08:13,131 --> 00:08:17,469
Jeff carved strawberries that
look just like roses. Uncanny.
128
00:08:17,553 --> 00:08:20,180
Okay, but you're not the only
one that's got stuff going on.
129
00:08:20,263 --> 00:08:23,183
There's stuff happening
here, too. Big stuff.
130
00:08:23,266 --> 00:08:25,728
What stuff?
131
00:08:25,810 --> 00:08:28,647
I'm just saying that
major stuff is happening.
132
00:08:28,731 --> 00:08:29,856
Like what?
133
00:08:29,939 --> 00:08:32,693
If you'd seen it your eyes
would have caught on fire.
134
00:08:32,776 --> 00:08:35,529
Grace kissed a convict.
135
00:08:35,612 --> 00:08:37,656
- What do you mean?
- What do I mean?
136
00:08:37,740 --> 00:08:40,992
Grace's face was smooshed
up against Byron's face.
137
00:08:41,076 --> 00:08:43,995
- Their lips were attached.
- The murderer?
138
00:08:44,079 --> 00:08:45,830
No, no, grand theft auto.
139
00:08:45,914 --> 00:08:47,791
You know, with the eyes.
140
00:08:47,874 --> 00:08:50,586
Oh. Yeah. Well, I can understand that.
141
00:08:50,669 --> 00:08:54,381
- I know, right?
- Isn't Grace still dating Guy?
142
00:08:54,464 --> 00:08:56,800
Yes, that's what makes it even crazier.
143
00:08:56,883 --> 00:08:59,135
Guy left to get me some
of those little quiches,
144
00:08:59,219 --> 00:09:01,179
next thing I know, Grace is kissing Byron.
145
00:09:01,263 --> 00:09:04,808
Grace! Our Grace!
146
00:09:04,891 --> 00:09:06,976
Yes, and apparently it
was not the first time.
147
00:09:07,060 --> 00:09:08,645
I mean, she's insatiable!
148
00:09:10,063 --> 00:09:12,524
It's the best little
whorehouse in Texas over here.
149
00:09:12,608 --> 00:09:14,818
That's totally insane.
150
00:09:14,901 --> 00:09:17,696
Frankie, I have to go.
We're plating the food.
151
00:09:17,780 --> 00:09:20,741
Okay. Fine.
152
00:09:25,746 --> 00:09:27,706
I plate things, too.
153
00:09:27,790 --> 00:09:31,209
Incre�ble!
154
00:09:31,293 --> 00:09:34,129
Grace kissed one of
Frankie's convicts today.
155
00:09:34,212 --> 00:09:36,506
- My Grace?
- That's what I said.
156
00:09:36,590 --> 00:09:40,510
- And apparently it wasn't the first time.
- How the hell did that happen?
157
00:09:40,594 --> 00:09:44,013
- Well, you should see the convict.
- Really?
158
00:09:44,097 --> 00:09:47,350
He's the siren. And she's not single.
159
00:09:47,434 --> 00:09:50,520
Good for her. She deserves some fun.
160
00:09:50,604 --> 00:09:54,023
Wait a minute. She's
dating your friend Guy.
161
00:09:54,107 --> 00:09:56,568
- They're not married.
- But they're together.
162
00:09:56,652 --> 00:09:59,529
And she's just kissing anyone
who wanders into the house?
163
00:09:59,613 --> 00:10:02,574
But we don't know the circumstances,
do we, so who are we to judge?
164
00:10:02,658 --> 00:10:05,786
Is that what you think? You
think there's a gray area?
165
00:10:05,869 --> 00:10:07,996
We never kissed anyone but each other.
166
00:10:11,333 --> 00:10:12,334
Did we?
167
00:10:22,886 --> 00:10:26,097
Do what must be done, just get them.
168
00:10:26,181 --> 00:10:28,350
Exclamation point.
169
00:10:32,187 --> 00:10:33,730
- Hey, Bri.
- Hey, Bri.
170
00:10:35,148 --> 00:10:37,526
No. No. No.
171
00:10:37,609 --> 00:10:39,986
Guys, please go away. Really?
172
00:10:40,069 --> 00:10:41,488
- You with anyone?
- No.
173
00:10:41,571 --> 00:10:42,823
- Wanna sit with us?
- No.
174
00:10:42,906 --> 00:10:44,825
- Why not?
- Because I'm with someone!
175
00:10:44,908 --> 00:10:48,704
- Ooh, what's this guy's problem?
- Please, please go away.
176
00:10:48,787 --> 00:10:51,832
Wait, wait, wait. The
last one was Racist Dave.
177
00:10:51,915 --> 00:10:53,917
- I loved Racist Dave.
- Feeling was mutual.
178
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:57,295
And before him was Ambiguous
Andrew, and Micropenis Paul.
179
00:10:57,379 --> 00:10:59,464
- Yeah, it's a war out here.
- So, what's this guy's deal?
180
00:10:59,548 --> 00:11:01,341
- Does he smell like a cat?
- Does he have a cat?
181
00:11:01,424 --> 00:11:03,134
- Is he a cat?
- Yes, he's a cat,
182
00:11:03,218 --> 00:11:05,178
and his name is go to a
different fucking movie.
183
00:11:05,261 --> 00:11:06,680
It's not gonna fucking happen.
184
00:11:06,763 --> 00:11:09,182
Well, I won.
185
00:11:10,809 --> 00:11:12,143
Minor casualties.
186
00:11:17,941 --> 00:11:20,903
- Mmm.
- Do we know them?
187
00:11:20,985 --> 00:11:23,029
I'm afraid that we do.
188
00:11:23,112 --> 00:11:24,447
Do you do magic?
189
00:11:24,531 --> 00:11:27,743
- And you are...
- Coyote.
190
00:11:29,327 --> 00:11:32,622
Nwabudike. Can you spell
that? Do you wanna try?
191
00:11:32,706 --> 00:11:33,998
I've known them my whole life.
192
00:11:34,082 --> 00:11:36,251
It's their father who's marrying my father.
193
00:11:37,085 --> 00:11:38,837
Did I not tell you about that?
194
00:11:38,921 --> 00:11:42,925
It's totally fine, I'm
not damaged... by that.
195
00:11:43,007 --> 00:11:46,762
The mussel fritters caused
a riot at our last event.
196
00:11:46,845 --> 00:11:49,514
- Not a riot, Jeff.
- A stampede.
197
00:11:49,598 --> 00:11:51,558
Fair enough.
198
00:11:51,641 --> 00:11:54,811
There's a riot going on
in my mouth right now.
199
00:11:54,895 --> 00:11:57,731
That's the aioli. Hot pepper and lime.
200
00:11:57,814 --> 00:12:00,316
You kissed someone, is
that what you're telling me?
201
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:03,820
Sol, you must try one of the potato nests.
202
00:12:05,989 --> 00:12:08,742
- Let's get more wine.
- Why? There's plenty here.
203
00:12:08,825 --> 00:12:11,703
Do you want to have an uncomfortable
conversation right here?
204
00:12:11,787 --> 00:12:15,749
We need more wine. Please excuse us.
205
00:12:20,712 --> 00:12:22,255
Have you ever been married?
206
00:12:22,338 --> 00:12:24,048
- No.
- Why not?
207
00:12:24,132 --> 00:12:26,301
- Well...
- You're tall.
208
00:12:26,384 --> 00:12:29,220
Do you have a thyroid problem?
Family history of pituitary issues?
209
00:12:29,304 --> 00:12:31,347
- Nope.
- You think you're better than me?
210
00:12:31,431 --> 00:12:34,100
It's "than I?" Maybe a little.
211
00:12:34,183 --> 00:12:36,436
I am taller than you.
And I have better grammar.
212
00:12:36,519 --> 00:12:38,480
- Where you from?
- Des Moines?
213
00:12:38,563 --> 00:12:40,732
Okay, I have no opinions on Des Moines.
214
00:12:40,816 --> 00:12:43,151
- Parents divorced?
- Not currently.
215
00:12:43,234 --> 00:12:44,235
Where do you work?
216
00:12:48,698 --> 00:12:49,783
He actually works for me.
217
00:12:49,866 --> 00:12:51,576
- There it is!
- That's the problem!
218
00:12:51,660 --> 00:12:53,411
Look, I know, before you say anything else,
219
00:12:53,495 --> 00:12:56,247
I'm just gonna go out
on a limb here and say...
220
00:12:56,331 --> 00:12:57,833
I'm really crazy about her.
221
00:12:59,542 --> 00:13:01,419
Do either of you guys
have a problem with that?
222
00:13:02,545 --> 00:13:05,007
I don't have a problem with that.
223
00:13:05,089 --> 00:13:07,676
Well. Well, well.
224
00:13:07,759 --> 00:13:10,345
Tall-Pants McGrammar-Glasses
put us in our place, didn't he?
225
00:13:10,428 --> 00:13:13,056
Yeah. Just gonna go back to my real seat.
226
00:13:14,140 --> 00:13:17,019
Pleasure meeting you,
Inevitable Lawsuit Barry.
227
00:13:17,101 --> 00:13:18,102
You, too.
228
00:13:18,186 --> 00:13:20,605
- You kissed somebody?
- It doesn't matter.
229
00:13:20,689 --> 00:13:21,815
Was it more than a kiss?
230
00:13:24,317 --> 00:13:27,029
Oh, God, it was more than a kiss!
231
00:13:27,111 --> 00:13:29,614
It was twelve years ago,
and we were broken up!
232
00:13:29,698 --> 00:13:31,157
You still should have told me!
233
00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:34,369
- Sol, please, let it go.
- That's not how it works.
234
00:13:34,452 --> 00:13:36,705
It would be over by
now if you told me then,
235
00:13:36,788 --> 00:13:40,583
but you didn't, so letting
it go might take a while.
236
00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:44,295
So, when should I have told you? When
it happened and we weren't speaking?
237
00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:46,589
Or when we got back together
and things were good again?
238
00:13:46,673 --> 00:13:48,008
I don't know!
239
00:13:48,091 --> 00:13:51,386
Okay, okay, fine, you're
right. You're absolutely right.
240
00:13:51,469 --> 00:13:53,889
I should have told you
at the appropriate time,
241
00:13:53,972 --> 00:13:56,641
in the appropriate way, but this isn't it!
242
00:14:01,396 --> 00:14:04,607
Can we just please get
through this evening, Sol?
243
00:14:04,691 --> 00:14:07,193
The guys made all that food just for us.
244
00:14:07,276 --> 00:14:09,487
Well, I can't eat now.
245
00:14:11,531 --> 00:14:12,741
Sol...
246
00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:19,122
Oy. Hello?
247
00:14:19,205 --> 00:14:21,041
Do you have the hard shell Tumi over there?
248
00:14:21,124 --> 00:14:23,167
- The what?
- My suitcase.
249
00:14:23,251 --> 00:14:25,128
I don't know, Grace, I'll have to look.
250
00:14:25,211 --> 00:14:28,506
Okay...? What's going on, Robert?
251
00:14:28,590 --> 00:14:30,884
- Nothing.
- What's wrong?
252
00:14:30,967 --> 00:14:33,636
I know that voice. What happened?
253
00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:34,846
Oh, for Christ's sake, Grace,
254
00:14:34,930 --> 00:14:37,557
there's a shitstorm over here,
all because you kissed a convict.
255
00:14:37,640 --> 00:14:39,559
What? Who told you that?
256
00:14:39,642 --> 00:14:43,229
Sol did, after Frankie told
him. And now I'm paying for it.
257
00:14:43,312 --> 00:14:45,607
I gotta go, kid. He's beside himself!
258
00:14:54,616 --> 00:14:58,828
- Uh-oh. - You told
Sol I kissed Byron!
259
00:14:58,912 --> 00:15:02,124
- I didn't know it was a secret.
- Of course you did!
260
00:15:03,917 --> 00:15:06,294
I have poor impulse control.
It's always been a problem.
261
00:15:06,377 --> 00:15:08,630
- Oh, please.
- It's true.
262
00:15:08,713 --> 00:15:10,298
I was once a shoo-in to win
263
00:15:10,381 --> 00:15:13,009
the giant produce contest
at the fair in Del Mar.
264
00:15:13,093 --> 00:15:16,220
But I caved and ate the zucchini
in the car on the way over.
265
00:15:16,304 --> 00:15:19,724
It's a condition, like
irritable bowel syndrome.
266
00:15:19,808 --> 00:15:22,769
I don't wanna hear about your problems!
267
00:15:22,852 --> 00:15:25,981
- I'm a private person, you know that.
- Yes.
268
00:15:26,064 --> 00:15:30,610
- You deliberately violated me.
- I'm sorry, I really am.
269
00:15:30,693 --> 00:15:34,322
I specifically said that I
had not told a living soul.
270
00:15:34,405 --> 00:15:37,241
You begged me to tell you.
271
00:15:37,325 --> 00:15:39,619
And for half a minute I
thought you were my friend.
272
00:15:39,702 --> 00:15:42,164
I am your friend, I'm your
friend with a big mouth.
273
00:15:42,246 --> 00:15:44,749
Well, I don't want a
friend with a big mouth.
274
00:15:44,833 --> 00:15:48,128
I want a friend I can
trust. Counts you out.
275
00:15:48,211 --> 00:15:51,047
Oh, please, don't count me out.
276
00:15:51,131 --> 00:15:55,301
I only told Sol, and it's not
like telling a real person.
277
00:15:55,384 --> 00:15:56,552
He's like my sister.
278
00:15:56,636 --> 00:16:01,099
Oh, he is the worst person
you could tell! He told Robert.
279
00:16:01,183 --> 00:16:03,726
But isn't it a little bit
exciting that Robert knows?
280
00:16:03,810 --> 00:16:05,937
They think they're having
all the fun over there.
281
00:16:06,021 --> 00:16:08,564
They need to know that some
stuff happens here, too.
282
00:16:08,648 --> 00:16:10,066
No, they don't!
283
00:16:10,150 --> 00:16:12,861
Oh, come on, you were dying to tell me.
284
00:16:12,944 --> 00:16:15,363
By the way, did you know
that secrets are bad for you?
285
00:16:15,446 --> 00:16:18,908
They can give you fibroids.
Or is that grief-eating?
286
00:16:18,992 --> 00:16:22,537
- Either way, they are extremely toxic.
- Being your friend is toxic!
287
00:16:22,620 --> 00:16:25,040
Okay, you're right. I screwed up.
288
00:16:25,123 --> 00:16:27,083
You deserve to be angry.
289
00:16:27,167 --> 00:16:29,794
But the only person I told was Sol!
290
00:16:29,878 --> 00:16:31,546
You don't speak to anyone else!
291
00:16:31,629 --> 00:16:34,216
It's not like I blabbed to Guy and
told him that you were over there
292
00:16:34,298 --> 00:16:37,343
kissing ex-convicts at
4:00 in the afternoon.
293
00:16:37,426 --> 00:16:39,345
You did what?
294
00:16:40,847 --> 00:16:42,473
Hi, Guy!
295
00:16:42,557 --> 00:16:44,184
What did you do this afternoon?
296
00:16:46,102 --> 00:16:49,605
I told you there was too
much coming and going.
297
00:16:49,689 --> 00:16:51,274
You should've made him wear a bell.
298
00:16:56,863 --> 00:16:59,282
These crab cakes should be illegal!
299
00:16:59,365 --> 00:17:03,078
- Crab clusters!
- Just tell me who it was.
300
00:17:05,788 --> 00:17:08,541
Was it someone I know?
301
00:17:08,624 --> 00:17:10,543
I don't know everyone you know.
302
00:17:10,626 --> 00:17:12,254
That's not answering my question!
303
00:17:12,336 --> 00:17:15,924
Tiger prawn twisters, y'all.
Comin' up in t-minus one minute.
304
00:17:16,007 --> 00:17:17,967
I don't know which is
worse, that you did it,
305
00:17:18,051 --> 00:17:19,261
or that you didn't tell me!
306
00:17:19,343 --> 00:17:23,265
- I really wish I hadn't done either.
- Correction, 30 seconds!
307
00:17:23,347 --> 00:17:26,976
We know five gay people in the world
and two of them are in the kitchen.
308
00:17:32,065 --> 00:17:35,610
My God in heaven, not Peter.
309
00:17:35,693 --> 00:17:39,989
- You slept with Peter!
- Worse. Jeff.
310
00:17:40,073 --> 00:17:44,410
- Jeff!
- Yes?
311
00:17:44,493 --> 00:17:48,497
So, you're telling me that
you kissed a convict at 4?
312
00:17:48,581 --> 00:17:50,208
I left at 3:50.
313
00:17:50,292 --> 00:17:52,668
It could have been ten after.
314
00:17:52,752 --> 00:17:55,671
- Well, what the hell happened?
- I didn't kiss him, he kissed me.
315
00:17:57,465 --> 00:18:00,718
So now you're telling me that
a convict forced himself on you?
316
00:18:00,802 --> 00:18:05,431
Yes. Well, no, I wouldn't
say forced, but forceful.
317
00:18:05,514 --> 00:18:07,725
Let me handle this.
318
00:18:07,809 --> 00:18:12,355
I teach art to society's
outcasts. It's meaningful work.
319
00:18:12,438 --> 00:18:15,650
- I derive much joy from it.
- Oh, Frankie.
320
00:18:15,733 --> 00:18:19,779
Sometimes these outcasts society's
forgotten end up in the kitchen,
321
00:18:19,862 --> 00:18:23,116
and this one just happened
to kiss Grace. It's no biggie.
322
00:18:23,199 --> 00:18:24,867
Everybody should go about their business.
323
00:18:24,951 --> 00:18:27,453
- Yeah.
- Are those my teeny quiches?
324
00:18:27,536 --> 00:18:29,164
It didn't mean anything, Guy.
325
00:18:29,247 --> 00:18:31,457
It's not something that's
ever gonna happen again.
326
00:18:31,540 --> 00:18:36,045
All right. Well, I gotta tell you, I
just don't feel like sushi right now.
327
00:18:39,757 --> 00:18:40,883
Are you happy now?
328
00:18:41,926 --> 00:18:45,054
- No, I'm not happy. Don't say that.
- It's what you wanted, isn't it?
329
00:18:45,138 --> 00:18:47,807
No, it isn't what I wanted.
330
00:18:47,890 --> 00:18:49,892
He'll be back.
331
00:18:53,729 --> 00:18:55,148
I mean it, Jeff.
332
00:18:55,231 --> 00:18:56,691
Take your fritters and go.
333
00:18:56,774 --> 00:18:59,652
Actually, leave the fritters, and
the crab cake clusters, please.
334
00:18:59,735 --> 00:19:04,073
It was one night, Sol. And if it's any
consolation, we were not compatible.
335
00:19:04,157 --> 00:19:06,201
It's not any consolation at all.
336
00:19:06,284 --> 00:19:09,871
- My God, what's the point of being gay?
- I didn't know there was a point.
337
00:19:09,954 --> 00:19:13,833
Come on, if you can't shed the conventions
of a hetero life, where's the fun?
338
00:19:13,916 --> 00:19:17,962
I'm not gay in order to shed conventions,
I'm gay because I love this man!
339
00:19:18,046 --> 00:19:20,673
This one, the one you didn't
much enjoy sleeping with!
340
00:19:20,756 --> 00:19:23,676
- You can still love Robert.
- I still love Jeff.
341
00:19:24,677 --> 00:19:25,803
Is that how you feel?
342
00:19:29,807 --> 00:19:33,519
I feel it's time for Jeff and
Peter to go. I'm sorry, fellas.
343
00:19:33,602 --> 00:19:37,857
But obviously Sol and I have
some serious talking to do.
344
00:19:41,194 --> 00:19:43,154
- What about my wok?
- We'll get it later.
345
00:19:43,238 --> 00:19:46,449
That was maybe the most
violent movie I've ever seen.
346
00:19:46,532 --> 00:19:50,912
I know. Next time we should save the $30
and just smack each other in the face.
347
00:19:50,995 --> 00:19:53,789
Aw, so that means there's a next time?
348
00:19:55,458 --> 00:19:58,044
Hey, I'm sorry for my... Bud and Coyote.
349
00:19:58,127 --> 00:20:01,505
Oh, no, no. It's cool. You're really lucky.
350
00:20:01,589 --> 00:20:02,715
Am I?
351
00:20:02,798 --> 00:20:06,844
Yeah. Those guys are like brothers.
They were looking out for you.
352
00:20:06,928 --> 00:20:09,805
Yeah, I guess they can be sort of sweet.
353
00:20:15,978 --> 00:20:17,897
- Asswipes!
- Some Milk Duds...
354
00:20:17,980 --> 00:20:20,191
- Oh, shit, she's taking the heels off!
- For my milk buds!
355
00:20:20,275 --> 00:20:21,276
Go, go, go!
356
00:20:24,737 --> 00:20:26,072
I'll just...
357
00:20:27,365 --> 00:20:29,242
I'll just be here.
358
00:20:32,495 --> 00:20:36,165
- Hi.
- How are you doing? I'm so sorry.
359
00:20:36,249 --> 00:20:39,668
No, I'm sorry. I walked out. I
just needed some time to think.
360
00:20:39,752 --> 00:20:41,170
That's understandable.
361
00:20:41,254 --> 00:20:43,005
It's not your fault. I
mean, the guy kissed you.
362
00:20:43,089 --> 00:20:45,425
I'm sorry it happened. It
will never happen again.
363
00:20:45,508 --> 00:20:49,553
He's on the lam now. But
that's neither here nor there.
364
00:20:52,140 --> 00:20:54,558
You know, so I had to
wander around out there
365
00:20:54,642 --> 00:20:58,646
and... try to figure out why
this is bothering me so much.
366
00:20:58,729 --> 00:21:03,651
- It didn't mean anything.
- Well, no, it meant something to me.
367
00:21:03,734 --> 00:21:09,282
And I came to realize that... I
don't want anyone else kissing you.
368
00:21:09,365 --> 00:21:12,994
Oh, my goodness. So sincere.
369
00:21:15,663 --> 00:21:19,542
I've never been jealous.
I've never been possessive.
370
00:21:20,584 --> 00:21:24,588
And anytime anyone felt that way about
me, I was usually on the first plane,
371
00:21:24,672 --> 00:21:27,467
got the hell out of there.
That's not what I'm feeling here.
372
00:21:27,550 --> 00:21:31,513
Grace, you're... You're the
first thing that I think about
373
00:21:31,595 --> 00:21:33,848
when I wake up in the morning.
374
00:21:34,849 --> 00:21:37,810
And you're the last thing I think
about when I go to sleep at night.
375
00:21:37,893 --> 00:21:39,854
It makes sense.
376
00:21:39,937 --> 00:21:43,649
You just have to roll over on your
right side lately and there I am.
377
00:21:46,361 --> 00:21:47,820
I'm trying to tell you something here.
378
00:21:50,031 --> 00:21:51,949
I'm falling in love with you.
379
00:22:13,679 --> 00:22:16,265
You know what they say
about drinking alone?
380
00:22:16,349 --> 00:22:19,519
That there's twice as much to drink.
381
00:22:19,602 --> 00:22:21,812
It's valerian.
382
00:22:21,896 --> 00:22:24,106
Need something stronger?
383
00:22:24,190 --> 00:22:26,067
Just trying to quiet the head.
384
00:22:26,150 --> 00:22:27,693
Me, too.
385
00:22:38,704 --> 00:22:41,624
If I could undo it, believe me, I would.
386
00:22:41,707 --> 00:22:45,628
You and Jeff? Well, that's good to know.
387
00:22:45,711 --> 00:22:48,631
But that's not what's bothering me.
388
00:22:48,714 --> 00:22:51,467
Not what's bothering me
the most, at any rate.
389
00:22:51,551 --> 00:22:55,221
I'm here, talk to me. And try the noodles.
390
00:22:55,304 --> 00:22:57,806
All those things everyone said.
391
00:22:57,890 --> 00:23:03,687
"What's the point of being gay if
you're gonna live a conventional life?"
392
00:23:03,771 --> 00:23:06,274
I'm not the one that said 'em.
393
00:23:06,357 --> 00:23:09,068
And Jeff and Peter
certainly don't speak for me.
394
00:23:09,151 --> 00:23:11,820
But have you honestly thought about this?
395
00:23:11,904 --> 00:23:15,658
Did we really spend all those years
and fight our way out of one box
396
00:23:15,741 --> 00:23:17,701
just to climb into another?
397
00:23:17,785 --> 00:23:21,080
There are a lot of ways to be a couple.
398
00:23:21,163 --> 00:23:23,165
We just have to find the best way for us.
399
00:23:23,249 --> 00:23:26,168
You don't think we're doing this wrong?
400
00:23:26,252 --> 00:23:29,672
No, I don't think so.
401
00:23:29,755 --> 00:23:31,674
So...
402
00:23:31,757 --> 00:23:36,512
you're fine never
sleeping with anyone again,
403
00:23:36,596 --> 00:23:39,890
- or Jeff?
- Oh, God, yes.
404
00:23:41,183 --> 00:23:43,060
But you're not just doing this for me?
405
00:23:43,144 --> 00:23:45,647
I waited 20 years for you.
406
00:23:47,022 --> 00:23:49,942
I'd wait another 20 if I had to.
407
00:23:51,902 --> 00:23:54,738
There is no one else for me.
408
00:23:57,992 --> 00:24:01,287
You were the prize. I won.
409
00:24:09,378 --> 00:24:12,214
Oh, my God, why is this so good?
410
00:24:12,298 --> 00:24:14,258
It's criminal, right?
411
00:24:17,386 --> 00:24:20,222
We're going to hire
those idiots, aren't we?
412
00:24:22,725 --> 00:24:24,352
I'll call Diane.
413
00:24:41,619 --> 00:24:46,374
I know you're on a vocal fast from
me, and I wholeheartedly accept that,
414
00:24:46,457 --> 00:24:51,754
but I want to apologize sincerely
for telling Sol about you and Byron.
415
00:24:51,837 --> 00:24:53,756
Friends do not betray confidences.
416
00:24:53,839 --> 00:24:56,718
I know. It was not cool of me.
417
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,803
But I'm happy Guy came back,
and I want to make it up to you.
418
00:24:59,887 --> 00:25:01,430
You're moving out?
419
00:25:01,514 --> 00:25:05,893
I owe you one of my most
embarrassing secrets.
420
00:25:06,935 --> 00:25:08,979
And you can tell whomever.
421
00:25:09,063 --> 00:25:10,272
What the hell is that?
422
00:25:10,356 --> 00:25:15,069
It's a sex tape from
the '80s. Of me and Sol.
423
00:25:15,152 --> 00:25:18,781
Do whatever you want with it.
Call Robert. Tell the kids.
424
00:25:18,864 --> 00:25:22,660
- Put it on the 6:00 news if you like.
- Can I burn it?
425
00:25:22,744 --> 00:25:26,789
Please do. Watching yourself have sex...
426
00:25:26,872 --> 00:25:30,042
is so much better in your
mind than it is on film.
427
00:25:30,125 --> 00:25:33,295
I appreciate the gesture.
428
00:25:33,379 --> 00:25:36,674
I cannot believe I'm asking
this and I dread the answer,
429
00:25:36,758 --> 00:25:39,635
but what on Earth
possessed you to make that?
430
00:25:39,719 --> 00:25:41,596
It was a crazy night.
431
00:25:41,679 --> 00:25:45,767
We'd just returned from Plato's retreat.
We still had our gladiator costumes on.
432
00:25:45,849 --> 00:25:47,643
- Oh, you're kidding.
- I wish I were.
433
00:25:47,727 --> 00:25:50,187
The sword belt and the
sandals and everything?
434
00:25:50,271 --> 00:25:53,566
And the shields. We had to
put those down at one point.
435
00:25:53,649 --> 00:25:56,527
But what can I say? The spirit moved us.
436
00:25:56,611 --> 00:26:00,114
- It was a say yes night.
- What's that?
437
00:26:00,197 --> 00:26:02,950
That's a night where you go out
and you say yes to everything.
438
00:26:03,033 --> 00:26:06,328
Except one thing, which I won't do.
439
00:26:06,412 --> 00:26:09,791
- Where can we get a VCR?
- Oh, I'm not watching it again.
440
00:26:09,873 --> 00:26:13,419
Oh, yes you are. It's no fun if
you're not watching it with me.
441
00:26:13,502 --> 00:26:18,006
How about I give you another secret and
50 bucks, and we don't watch the tape?
442
00:26:18,090 --> 00:26:21,427
Okay. But I get to decide
if the secret's good enough.
443
00:26:21,510 --> 00:26:25,473
Okay. I once made out with a monkey.
444
00:26:25,556 --> 00:26:27,600
You did not.
445
00:26:27,683 --> 00:26:29,477
One of the Monkees, Micky Dolenz.
446
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,104
Oh, no! He's the worst one.
447
00:26:32,187 --> 00:26:35,107
- Not with his tongue.
- Oh, God!
36398
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