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1
00:00:40,026 --> 00:00:42,802
Boy, you really know antiques.
You know, you're incredible?
2
00:00:42,863 --> 00:00:45,969
- Yes, I am.
- That's some buy we got on that clock.
3
00:00:46,032 --> 00:00:48,034
Okay, Bob, Watch it.
Don't scratch it.
4
00:00:48,101 --> 00:00:51,412
Watch it. Watch it. Don't scratch it.
In it goes. In a little farther.
5
00:00:51,471 --> 00:00:53,678
In a little farther. Watch it.
Hold it. Wait, wait, wait.
6
00:00:53,740 --> 00:00:57,119
Right, right there. Watch it.
Uh, will you watch that dolly too, Bob?
7
00:00:57,177 --> 00:01:00,647
I rented that in my name.
8
00:01:00,714 --> 00:01:02,955
So I'd like to take it easy.
I like to return things the way I got them.
9
00:01:03,016 --> 00:01:05,553
- Howard?
- I'm a very responsible person.
10
00:01:05,619 --> 00:01:07,724
- Howard?
- I like to take care of my things.
11
00:01:07,788 --> 00:01:10,735
- Howard?
- I have albums that are 12 years old...
12
00:01:10,791 --> 00:01:12,998
and they don't have
scratches on them.
13
00:01:13,059 --> 00:01:15,733
Howard, can we talk about
your record collection later?
14
00:01:15,796 --> 00:01:18,037
Oh, yeah, right.
Uh, when would you like to talk about it?
15
00:01:18,098 --> 00:01:19,600
Later!
16
00:01:19,666 --> 00:01:21,942
Oh, Bob, that is really beautiful.
17
00:01:22,002 --> 00:01:24,004
What could be better
than a grandfather clock?
18
00:01:24,070 --> 00:01:27,279
A grandfather watch.
19
00:01:27,340 --> 00:01:29,547
Well, where you gonna put it?
20
00:01:29,609 --> 00:01:31,919
Well, I thought we'd put it
by the bedroom door.
21
00:01:31,978 --> 00:01:34,356
- Oh, yeah, yeah. It'd look nice there.
- Yeah.
22
00:01:35,615 --> 00:01:37,561
No, no, no, it won't fit there.
23
00:01:37,617 --> 00:01:39,790
- Oh, it won't?
- No, uh-uh. Oh, how about over there?
24
00:01:39,853 --> 00:01:41,799
It'll be out of the way,
but it's still prominent.
25
00:01:41,855 --> 00:01:44,199
Emily]
Yeah, that's okay.
26
00:01:44,257 --> 00:01:46,533
No, no, no,
that's not good either,.
27
00:01:46,593 --> 00:01:50,564
- Well, then where else can we put it?
- How about down?
28
00:01:50,630 --> 00:01:53,201
I'm sorry, honey.
just put it over there for now.
29
00:01:53,266 --> 00:01:55,439
I'll give you a hand. Here.
30
00:01:55,502 --> 00:01:57,539
Thank you, Howard.
31
00:01:57,604 --> 00:02:00,210
Okay.
32
00:02:00,273 --> 00:02:03,015
One, two, three!
33
00:02:06,046 --> 00:02:09,425
We're, uh- We're a great team, Howard.
You know that?
34
00:02:11,184 --> 00:02:14,290
You know, Bob, I really think it would
look better by the bedroom door.
35
00:02:14,354 --> 00:02:16,891
Tough.
36
00:02:16,957 --> 00:02:19,062
Well, I guess we can
leave it there for now.
37
00:02:19,125 --> 00:02:21,071
The whole room's
gonna change anyhow.
38
00:02:21,127 --> 00:02:23,505
- The whole room? Wow.
- [Emily] Uh-huh.
39
00:02:23,563 --> 00:02:25,634
What's it gonna look like?
40
00:02:25,699 --> 00:02:27,701
Well, we're gonna have
new drapes and new carpet.
41
00:02:27,767 --> 00:02:30,247
We're gonna enlarge that doorway.
We're getting rid of the bookshelves.
42
00:02:30,303 --> 00:02:32,249
And we're gonna get
all new furniture.
43
00:02:32,305 --> 00:02:34,148
I know howl can
save you a couple of bucks.
44
00:02:34,207 --> 00:02:36,153
You can get some of that
new fun plastic furniture.
45
00:02:36,209 --> 00:02:40,316
Uh, this pilot friend of mine has a couch
that looks like a banana...
46
00:02:40,380 --> 00:02:44,920
and a chair that looks like a strawberry
and an ottoman that looks like a tangerine.
47
00:02:44,985 --> 00:02:47,693
Let's get it. That way you can sit
on the fruit of your choice.
48
00:02:50,624 --> 00:02:53,332
Howard, we're going for a look
that's warm and eclectic.
49
00:02:53,393 --> 00:02:55,873
Electric? Oh, that's great!
I love electric furniture.
50
00:02:55,929 --> 00:02:59,433
We can have races.
51
00:02:59,499 --> 00:03:02,309
Eclectic is a mixture of new and old,
but we're going mostly old.
52
00:03:02,369 --> 00:03:05,839
- You know, mainly antiques.
- But we can still have races, Howard.
53
00:03:07,007 --> 00:03:09,613
10:00 tomorrow morning,
and don't be late.
54
00:03:09,676 --> 00:03:13,385
- The best stuff goes first at those estate sales.
- Okay.
55
00:03:13,446 --> 00:03:15,722
Uh, look, since you're
getting new furniture...
56
00:03:15,782 --> 00:03:18,695
I could take some of
your old stuff off your hands.
57
00:03:18,752 --> 00:03:21,528
- What do you mean, take?
- Well, you know...
58
00:03:21,588 --> 00:03:26,128
stuff you don't need,
like, uh, table and sofa...
59
00:03:26,192 --> 00:03:28,297
and canned goods.
60
00:03:28,361 --> 00:03:32,138
Well, there's a half empty bottle of root beer
in the refrigerator.
61
00:03:32,198 --> 00:03:34,405
- Oh, is the bottle refundable?
- No.
62
00:03:34,467 --> 00:03:36,413
Oh, well, then I don't want it.
63
00:03:37,404 --> 00:03:39,350
Bye, H owa rd.
64
00:03:42,409 --> 00:03:44,355
It's not ticking.
65
00:03:44,411 --> 00:03:46,357
“Emiiy ma
- I w/u/vy 2
66
00:03:46,413 --> 00:03:48,359
Yeah.
67
00:03:54,854 --> 00:03:57,095
College graduate.
68
00:03:57,157 --> 00:03:59,103
Let's set it, Bob.
What time is it?
69
00:03:59,159 --> 00:04:01,298
Uh,just about 5:00.
70
00:04:01,361 --> 00:04:04,274
Okay. All right.
71
00:04:04,331 --> 00:04:08,473
[Chiming]
72
00:04:08,535 --> 00:04:11,311
Oh, Bob, isn't that beautiful?
73
00:04:11,371 --> 00:04:16,445
[Clunking]
74
00:04:21,047 --> 00:04:24,051
Well, no wonder it was so heavy.
There's a dead body in there.
75
00:04:28,655 --> 00:04:31,693
Well, you know, I don't know.
76
00:04:31,758 --> 00:04:35,137
I don't know, Dr. Hartley.
I really like working for that company...
77
00:04:35,195 --> 00:04:38,438
but how can they send me
to a hellhole like that?
78
00:04:38,498 --> 00:04:40,637
Well, where do they
wanna transfer you?
79
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:42,646
Hawaii.
80
00:04:44,204 --> 00:04:46,150
It's where the home office is.
81
00:04:46,206 --> 00:04:50,586
Well, that makes sense.
I mean, it is a coconut company.
82
00:04:50,643 --> 00:04:52,680
And we're branching out
into novelty items.
83
00:04:52,746 --> 00:04:55,420
You know, carving animals
out of coconut shells.
84
00:04:55,482 --> 00:04:58,463
They want me to head up
the monkey division.
85
00:04:58,518 --> 00:05:01,294
Well, that sounds like
a good opportunity.
86
00:05:01,354 --> 00:05:05,097
Uh, I'm not sure Hawaii is exactly
the hellholeyou think it is.
87
00:05:05,158 --> 00:05:07,764
I'm really gonna
miss Chicago, you know?
88
00:05:07,827 --> 00:05:11,331
The wind, the sleet...
89
00:05:11,398 --> 00:05:13,344
the slush...
90
00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:16,074
the smell of the stockyards.
91
00:05:16,136 --> 00:05:18,946
Mr. Herd,
the stockyards are gone.
92
00:05:19,005 --> 00:05:21,281
Then what is that smell?
93
00:05:24,477 --> 00:05:26,423
I don't know.
94
00:05:26,479 --> 00:05:30,689
Well, uh, whatever it is,
I'm gonna miss it.
95
00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:34,323
I'm afraid our time is up, Mr. Herd.
Uh, you know, I envy you though.
96
00:05:34,387 --> 00:05:37,925
I mean, tomorrow I have to leave for
a psychologists' seminar in Winnipeg...
97
00:05:37,991 --> 00:05:39,937
and it's supposed
to be 12 below zero.
98
00:05:39,993 --> 00:05:42,473
Oh, 12 below zero.
Beautiful.
99
00:05:42,529 --> 00:05:45,476
That's coconut-freezing weather.
100
00:05:47,033 --> 00:05:50,207
I guess you're off to the land
of swaying palms, huh, Mr. Herd?
101
00:05:50,270 --> 00:05:53,149
- Don't rub it in, Carol.
- [E/e vator Ding; ]
102
00:05:53,206 --> 00:05:56,312
Oh, hi, Mr. Herd.
Boy, it is freezing out there.
103
00:05:56,376 --> 00:05:59,186
- The wind cuts through you like a knife.
- Yeah, isn't it wonderful?
104
00:06:02,649 --> 00:06:06,096
Bob, I'm glad I caught you. I need your opinion
about some things for the apartment.
105
00:06:06,152 --> 00:06:09,065
Well, Emily, anything you pick out
will bejustfine.
106
00:06:09,122 --> 00:06:11,068
Oh, honey, I want you
to see it first.
107
00:06:11,124 --> 00:06:13,832
Well, I'm sure whateveryou pick out
will bejust perfect.
108
00:06:13,893 --> 00:06:17,500
Oh, no, I want you to help me make
some decisions. Could you look at some samples?
109
00:06:17,564 --> 00:06:20,602
Oh, I love redecorating.
Especially when it's someone else's money.
110
00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:23,671
Uh, now this is for
wallpaper for the kitchen.
111
00:06:23,736 --> 00:06:26,273
- What do you think of that one?
- Fine.
112
00:06:26,339 --> 00:06:27,784
- Or that?
- Fine.
113
00:06:27,841 --> 00:06:30,845
- Or that?
- Fine.
114
00:06:30,910 --> 00:06:32,912
Gee, I thought they were
all too busy.
115
00:06:32,979 --> 00:06:35,585
Well, so am I, Emily.
I'm just gonna leave it to you.
116
00:06:35,648 --> 00:06:37,594
- [ Phone Ringing]
- You're bailing out?
117
00:06:37,650 --> 00:06:39,652
- I'm not bailing out. I'm really very busy.
- Dr. Hartleys office.
118
00:06:39,719 --> 00:06:41,699
- Wait.
- Uh,just a minute.
119
00:06:41,754 --> 00:06:45,099
Bob, it's the service station. They just
wanna know if you want your oil changed.
120
00:06:45,158 --> 00:06:49,004
Oh, gee, I better
talk to them about that.
121
00:06:49,062 --> 00:06:51,440
Uh, I'll take it in here.
122
00:06:52,499 --> 00:06:55,173
- You are bailing out.
- Hi, Emily.
123
00:06:55,235 --> 00:06:57,476
- Oh, hLJer. Excuse me.
- Excuse me.
124
00:06:57,537 --> 00:06:59,778
Carol, is this my mail
underneath all this debris?
125
00:06:59,839 --> 00:07:02,547
- I'll bring it in in a minute,jer.
- First things first.
126
00:07:02,609 --> 00:07:05,089
You know, forget about business.
You've got paint chips to look at.
127
00:07:05,145 --> 00:07:07,455
Well, goshJer, I should have thought
of that this morning...
128
00:07:07,514 --> 00:07:10,723
before I picked up your laundry,
called your mother to cancel dinner...
129
00:07:10,783 --> 00:07:12,820
sent flowers to the hospital
for your aunt...
130
00:07:12,886 --> 00:07:14,957
and picked up the tickets
for the hockey game.
131
00:07:15,021 --> 00:07:17,558
[Clears Throat]
Well, that was before 9:00.
132
00:07:17,624 --> 00:07:20,298
I mean, what you do
on your time is your business.
133
00:07:21,861 --> 00:07:24,671
Well, this is not Carol's stuff,
so don't blame her.
134
00:07:24,731 --> 00:07:28,804
But by the wayJerry,
what would you say about this carpet sample?
135
00:07:28,868 --> 00:07:31,542
I'd say, uh,
“We're Mr. and Mrs. Smith...
136
00:07:31,604 --> 00:07:33,550
and we just need the room
for two or three hours.“
137
00:07:33,606 --> 00:07:36,610
- [Clicks Tongue]
- Uh-huh. Uh, well, what about the olive?
138
00:07:36,676 --> 00:07:39,054
Oh, that's great, for a barracks.
139
00:07:39,112 --> 00:07:42,093
Why don't you go drill somebody?
140
00:07:42,148 --> 00:07:44,094
I'm not trying to be negative here.
141
00:07:44,150 --> 00:07:46,289
It's just that all the stuff
you showed me so far stinks.
142
00:07:46,352 --> 00:07:49,026
- Nothing negative about that.
- Thanks for your help,jer.
143
00:07:49,088 --> 00:07:52,399
- Anytime.
- Listen, Carol, I want you to look at this magazine.
144
00:07:52,458 --> 00:07:54,836
You see, there are pictures
of famous people's houses.
145
00:07:54,894 --> 00:07:56,840
You know, to get the feel
of what I'm going after.
146
00:07:56,896 --> 00:07:59,069
See, this is
Harry Belafonte's living room.
147
00:07:59,132 --> 00:08:02,841
Oh, Emily, that's wonderful.
Oh, slipcovers open to the navel.
148
00:08:02,902 --> 00:08:05,280
[Both Laughing]
149
00:08:05,338 --> 00:08:07,511
You're not finished yet.
150
00:08:07,574 --> 00:08:10,680
- Did you decide on the oil?
- Yeah, I decided on the oil.
151
00:08:10,743 --> 00:08:14,953
Now I have to decide
whether I want to pop for the oil filter.
152
00:08:18,218 --> 00:08:22,166
I really wish Bob wouldn't duck this.
I shouldn't have to make these decisions.
153
00:08:22,222 --> 00:08:24,532
I'll get him out here.
154
00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:28,903
Emily, I'm really glad you decided
on the imported fabric.
155
00:08:28,962 --> 00:08:31,499
Believe me, it's worth
the extra $2,000.
156
00:08:36,970 --> 00:08:40,440
- Too late to get in on this?
- You finished?
157
00:08:40,506 --> 00:08:42,952
Yeah, I didn't want to
pop for the oil filter.
158
00:08:43,009 --> 00:08:45,853
We can't afford it.
159
00:08:49,082 --> 00:08:52,222
Oh, Bob is gonna be so surprised
when he comes back from Winnipeg.
160
00:08:52,285 --> 00:08:54,231
When he left,
just the carpet was down.
161
00:08:54,287 --> 00:08:56,289
They hadn't even started
construction on the doorway.
162
00:08:57,657 --> 00:09:00,001
- I love it! I really love it!
-You do?
163
00:09:00,059 --> 00:09:03,802
Yeah,your old dining room table
looks great in my place.
164
00:09:03,863 --> 00:09:06,002
What do you think about this table?
165
00:09:06,065 --> 00:09:08,875
Oh, you mean, your new old table.
166
00:09:08,935 --> 00:09:13,042
That's nice, but not as nice as your
old old table, that was yours, that's mine.
167
00:09:13,106 --> 00:09:15,279
Well, Howard,
that's very nice of you to say.
168
00:09:15,341 --> 00:09:17,753
That was very hard
for him to say.
169
00:09:17,810 --> 00:09:21,587
- But I meant it. - Oh, Howard, I
changed my mind about that suede chair.
170
00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:23,594
So, if you still wanna buy it,
it's for sale.
171
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:27,063
Oh, wow!
172
00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:29,066
I didn't think Bob
would let it go.
173
00:09:29,122 --> 00:09:32,433
Well, uh, he doesn't want to,
but it doesn't fit in anywhere.
174
00:09:32,492 --> 00:09:37,737
Oh, well, I couldn't take
a man's favorite chair.
175
00:09:37,797 --> 00:09:39,936
Could I?
176
00:09:39,999 --> 00:09:41,910
Why not?
You've taken everything else.
177
00:09:41,968 --> 00:09:45,347
Well, I, uh,
wouldn't feel right.
178
00:09:46,439 --> 00:09:49,249
- How much?
- $75.
179
00:09:49,309 --> 00:09:51,949
Do I get to keep everything
that's underneath the cushion?
180
00:09:52,011 --> 00:09:55,356
- Yegyou do.
- Well, then it's a deal.
181
00:09:55,415 --> 00:09:58,362
I'll be right back.
I'm gonna get my checkbook.
182
00:09:58,418 --> 00:10:01,126
Uh, Ellen, would you
bring the chair, please?
183
00:10:02,488 --> 00:10:04,832
Right, Howard.
184
00:10:04,891 --> 00:10:08,896
- Ellen, did you know Howard was such a-
- Scrounge?
185
00:10:10,229 --> 00:10:13,073
Hi, honey, I'm-
186
00:10:14,133 --> 00:10:16,204
Holy smoke.
187
00:10:16,269 --> 00:10:18,476
Hi, dear.
Well, what do you think?
188
00:10:20,173 --> 00:10:23,950
Uh, let me take your coat.
189
00:10:25,278 --> 00:10:28,521
just, uh-just put
your suitcase down.
190
00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:32,663
Come on in, and, you know,
take your time.
191
00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:36,166
Take a good look.
Let it all sink in.
192
00:10:38,825 --> 00:10:41,431
Uh, how was the convention?
193
00:10:41,494 --> 00:10:43,701
Holy smoke.
194
00:10:45,531 --> 00:10:48,375
Uh,well?
195
00:10:48,434 --> 00:10:50,971
Uh, the convention was fine.
196
00:10:51,037 --> 00:10:54,507
Oh, well, well, uh-
197
00:10:54,574 --> 00:10:57,282
Okay, uh, how about it?
198
00:10:59,946 --> 00:11:01,948
Oh, hi. Hi, Ellen.
199
00:11:03,015 --> 00:11:04,858
Hi, Bob.
You want a drink?
200
00:11:04,917 --> 00:11:07,227
Yeah.
201
00:11:07,286 --> 00:11:09,527
A drink would be good.
202
00:11:09,589 --> 00:11:12,536
Well, come on, Bob.
203
00:11:12,592 --> 00:11:16,665
- Holy smoke.
- Bob, is that good or bad?
204
00:11:16,729 --> 00:11:20,973
Uh,just, uh-
just let me sit down...
205
00:11:21,033 --> 00:11:23,377
and just get my bearings.
206
00:11:24,871 --> 00:11:27,681
Hi, Bob. Welcome home.
It's good to have you back again.
207
00:11:27,740 --> 00:11:31,244
Ah, don't sit in that chair.
That's mine.
208
00:11:34,013 --> 00:11:37,017
- Yours?
- Yeah. Here's your check for $75.
209
00:11:37,083 --> 00:11:40,155
$75. You sold him
my favorite chair for $75?
210
00:11:40,219 --> 00:11:42,358
Yeah, that includes
the tax and the ottoman.
211
00:11:42,422 --> 00:11:46,302
Emily, I love that chair.
I've had a lot of good times in it.
212
00:11:46,359 --> 00:11:50,330
I know, honey, but it just doesn't
fit in with the decor.
213
00:11:50,396 --> 00:11:54,469
Emily, I had that chair
before I had you.
214
00:11:54,534 --> 00:11:57,481
Well, I think maybe
we'll just come back a little later.
215
00:11:57,537 --> 00:12:00,848
We'll let you two enjoy
your new apartment by yourselves.
216
00:12:00,907 --> 00:12:04,582
I can pick up the chair anytime. Remember,
anything you find underneath the cushion is mine.
217
00:12:04,644 --> 00:12:06,681
- Come on, Howard.
- That was the deal.
218
00:12:10,183 --> 00:12:13,562
Uh, look, Bob.
I know it's all a shock, you know.
219
00:12:13,619 --> 00:12:18,034
I mean, all the furniture
is new and the construction is done.
220
00:12:18,090 --> 00:12:22,300
And, I mean, new carpet, new drapes.
New this, new that.
221
00:12:23,763 --> 00:12:25,709
Go ahead, honey.
Sit in it.
222
00:12:25,765 --> 00:12:29,508
It's a copy of a Louis XV,
and it's upholstered in satin.
223
00:12:42,982 --> 00:12:44,928
Uh, how is it?
224
00:12:44,984 --> 00:12:48,898
It'll be fine when I buy
some nonskid pants.
225
00:12:50,122 --> 00:12:52,295
Honey, did you see
the stuff on the wall?
226
00:12:52,358 --> 00:12:54,634
It took Ellen two days
to find that ox-yoke.
227
00:12:54,694 --> 00:12:57,436
She got lucky, huh?
228
00:12:57,497 --> 00:13:01,274
You know, I think it all worked out
beautifully, Bob. I just love the colors.
229
00:13:01,334 --> 00:13:03,644
Oh, uh, honey,
this is a campaign bed.
230
00:13:03,703 --> 00:13:07,048
I think there are only three
in all of Chicago.
231
00:13:07,106 --> 00:13:09,677
- And we got one of'em.
- Yeah.
232
00:13:11,711 --> 00:13:13,748
Well, uh-
233
00:13:16,482 --> 00:13:18,928
just sit back and relax.
234
00:13:28,528 --> 00:13:30,474
What, um-
235
00:13:32,899 --> 00:13:35,311
What- What campaign was it in?
236
00:13:38,104 --> 00:13:42,109
Bob, it's just a new way of sitting.
Youjust have to get used to it.
237
00:13:46,746 --> 00:13:49,727
Just starting to get the-
238
00:13:49,782 --> 00:13:52,956
- get the hang of the old way.
- What way was that?
239
00:13:53,019 --> 00:13:56,796
The way where your feet
go all the way to the floor.
240
00:13:56,856 --> 00:13:58,858
Oh, I see.
241
00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:04,432
But I guess comfort
isn't the be-all and end-all.
242
00:14:04,497 --> 00:14:08,377
Bob, I happen to be
very comfortable.
243
00:14:08,434 --> 00:14:11,711
Well, I'm glad somebody is.
244
00:14:11,771 --> 00:14:14,149
You hate the whole apartment,
don't you?
245
00:14:14,206 --> 00:14:16,482
[Sighs]
Emily-
246
00:14:20,413 --> 00:14:22,825
“Hate“ is a very strong word.
247
00:14:22,882 --> 00:14:28,833
You use “hate“ to describe
your thoughts about Hitler.
248
00:14:28,888 --> 00:14:32,495
I mean, this isn't
as bad as Hitler.
249
00:14:32,558 --> 00:14:37,371
This is more like, uh, Mussolini.
250
00:14:38,497 --> 00:14:41,034
Bob, I rushed all over
Chicago for weeks...
251
00:14:41,100 --> 00:14:44,047
trying to make this a place
we both could be proud of.
252
00:14:45,204 --> 00:14:48,447
I don't know, Emily.
I guess it's just the-
253
00:14:48,507 --> 00:14:50,453
the furniture.
254
00:14:52,878 --> 00:14:55,085
And the colors.
255
00:14:56,916 --> 00:14:59,829
Otherwise, everything is fine.
256
00:14:59,885 --> 00:15:02,092
[Chiming]
257
00:15:07,026 --> 00:15:09,666
[Clunking]
258
00:15:17,003 --> 00:15:20,780
There is one more thing.
259
00:15:26,312 --> 00:15:30,226
[Clock Chiming]
260
00:15:32,718 --> 00:15:36,256
[Clunking]
261
00:15:39,525 --> 00:15:42,233
- Don't say it, Bob.
- [ Mumbles ] What?
262
00:15:42,294 --> 00:15:46,640
- And don't pretend you're asleep.
- [ Mumbling]
263
00:15:46,699 --> 00:15:49,043
You brought it on yourself.
264
00:15:52,438 --> 00:15:54,384
Emily, what are you talking about?
265
00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:57,046
Our apartment,
and you have no right to complain.
266
00:15:57,109 --> 00:16:00,818
Who would I complain to, Louis XV?
267
00:16:02,314 --> 00:16:05,955
Bob, that chair happens to be
a copy of a museum piece.
268
00:16:06,018 --> 00:16:08,897
Well, then let's put ropes
around it and have tours.
269
00:16:11,157 --> 00:16:13,603
That's not very funny, Bob.
270
00:16:13,659 --> 00:16:15,570
It's the best I can do
at 4:00 a.m.
271
00:16:15,628 --> 00:16:17,471
So you did hear the clock chime?
272
00:16:17,530 --> 00:16:20,170
I heard it clunk.
273
00:16:20,232 --> 00:16:23,611
Well, I had to make
all the decisions.
274
00:16:23,669 --> 00:16:26,115
And, Emily, some of the decisions
you made were very good.
275
00:16:26,172 --> 00:16:28,948
- Like this bedroom.
- I didn't even touch the bedroom.
276
00:16:29,008 --> 00:16:30,954
Good decision.
277
00:16:32,478 --> 00:16:35,254
I've made another decision.
278
00:16:35,314 --> 00:16:38,625
I have decided you're gonna
have to live with the furniture the way it is.
279
00:16:38,684 --> 00:16:40,630
Why can't we send it back?
280
00:16:40,686 --> 00:16:44,293
Because we bought it at an estate sale,
and the owner is dead.
281
00:16:44,356 --> 00:16:47,735
He probably killed himself
sliding out of that satin chair.
282
00:16:49,929 --> 00:16:53,706
I like that chair, Bob,
and I like that couch and I like that room.
283
00:16:53,766 --> 00:16:57,179
- Well, what about me?
- I'm not crazy about you.
284
00:17:02,041 --> 00:17:05,318
All right, Emily.
I have to admit that, uh...
285
00:17:05,377 --> 00:17:07,323
well, I could have
been more helpful.
286
00:17:07,379 --> 00:17:10,519
No, you had to get
your oil changed.
287
00:17:10,583 --> 00:17:13,621
Well, I'm sorry, but, I mean,
I do live in this house...
288
00:17:13,686 --> 00:17:16,394
and I'm not gonna live in a room
where I might get hurt.
289
00:17:17,823 --> 00:17:20,167
So move.
290
00:17:20,226 --> 00:17:24,572
You know, you're behavingjust like
I did last Tuesday night in Winnipeg.
291
00:17:26,799 --> 00:17:29,643
- What were you doing?
- I was being stubborn.
292
00:17:29,702 --> 00:17:32,774
I was in a poker game,
and I kept betting on a losing hand.
293
00:17:32,838 --> 00:17:34,784
I mean, I should havejust folded
and taken my loss...
294
00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:37,548
- like we should do on that furniture.
- How are we gonna do that?
295
00:17:37,610 --> 00:17:40,648
- You take an ad in the paper. You sell it.
- I don't wanna sell it.
296
00:17:40,713 --> 00:17:43,660
Then burn it.
297
00:17:43,716 --> 00:17:47,289
All right, Bob. I fold.
298
00:17:47,353 --> 00:17:51,130
I toss in my hand, but you're gonna
have to help me get rid of that stuff...
299
00:17:51,190 --> 00:17:53,136
and you're gonna have to
help me pick out new furniture.
300
00:17:53,192 --> 00:17:55,570
And from now on,
you and I are in this together.
301
00:17:55,628 --> 00:17:58,438
It's a deal. Now let's get to sleep
before it's five o'clunk.
302
00:17:58,497 --> 00:18:00,443
Aka)'-
303
00:18:05,004 --> 00:18:07,848
Bob, how much you lose
in the poker game?
304
00:18:07,907 --> 00:18:10,217
$185.
305
00:18:10,276 --> 00:18:13,018
- Whatb' you have?
- Pair of deuces.
306
00:18:16,482 --> 00:18:19,258
There you go.
I hope you enjoy it as much as we did.
307
00:18:23,823 --> 00:18:27,236
Hiya. Still got the diving table?
308
00:18:27,293 --> 00:18:29,204
That's a dining table.
309
00:18:29,261 --> 00:18:31,935
Oh, well, the ad
in the paper said diving.
310
00:18:31,997 --> 00:18:34,375
Well, that's a misprint.
It's dining, and it's been sold.
311
00:18:34,433 --> 00:18:38,745
Well, what about
the “ganderfeather“ clock?
312
00:18:40,072 --> 00:18:42,450
That's been sold too.
313
00:18:42,508 --> 00:18:44,579
Come on, Maury.
Let's get outta here.
314
00:18:44,643 --> 00:18:46,816
No, wait, wait.
Let's look around.
315
00:18:46,879 --> 00:18:50,292
Hey, look at this
wall thing, Dorothy.
316
00:18:50,349 --> 00:18:52,226
Maury, that's junk.
317
00:18:52,284 --> 00:18:54,924
Uh, excuse me, but that ox-yoke
is over a hundred years old.
318
00:18:54,987 --> 00:19:00,596
Oh,just our luck.
Last week our ox ran away.
319
00:19:01,927 --> 00:19:04,134
- Let's see what's in here.
- That's our bedroom.
320
00:19:04,196 --> 00:19:06,676
Right. Thanks.
321
00:19:06,732 --> 00:19:09,269
- Hi, guys. How you cloin'?
- [Emi/Jw] Not bad.
322
00:19:09,335 --> 00:19:13,977
Oh, you sold
your ganderfeather clock.
323
00:19:14,039 --> 00:19:17,782
Yeah, we got lucky. We sold it five minutes
before it was about to strike twelve.
324
00:19:19,445 --> 00:19:23,120
- Well, you don't have much left.
- Well, we do have this nice satin chair.
325
00:19:23,182 --> 00:19:25,355
Oh, sounds like
a sales pitch to me.
326
00:19:25,417 --> 00:19:27,624
No, at this rate,
I'm ready to give it away.
327
00:19:27,686 --> 00:19:30,223
- Well, that's a good price. I'll take it.
- Oh, really.
328
00:19:30,289 --> 00:19:32,235
Besides, whenever my mother
comes to visit...
329
00:19:32,291 --> 00:19:34,293
she complains she never
has anyplace to sit.
330
00:19:34,360 --> 00:19:37,807
- She won't be able to sit in that.
- Good. She won't stay so long.
331
00:19:37,863 --> 00:19:42,334
- Say, how much you want for the shower curtain?
- They're not for sale.
332
00:19:42,401 --> 00:19:45,473
Put back the shower curtain, Dorothy.
333
00:19:47,439 --> 00:19:49,783
Hey, Bob, how's it going?
Where should I put these here?
334
00:19:49,842 --> 00:19:51,947
How about on your canjerry?
335
00:19:52,011 --> 00:19:56,357
Come on. You're having a sale.
I figure I could get rid of my snow tires.
336
00:19:56,415 --> 00:19:58,452
Jerry, we're selling antiques.
337
00:19:58,517 --> 00:20:02,021
These are antiques.
Theyre off of a '46 Hudson.
338
00:20:02,087 --> 00:20:04,533
They should go like hotcakes.
339
00:20:05,891 --> 00:20:08,337
Say, my wife wants to know
if we buy both lamps...
340
00:20:08,394 --> 00:20:10,340
would you throw in
the shower curtain for nothing?
341
00:20:10,396 --> 00:20:12,307
Nothing in the bedroom
is for sale.
342
00:20:12,364 --> 00:20:14,537
Then what are we doing in there?
343
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,137
I haven't the slightest idea.
344
00:20:18,137 --> 00:20:20,413
Some sale.
345
00:20:20,472 --> 00:20:24,579
Listen, Bob, on the snow tires,
don't take any out-of-state checks, huh?
346
00:20:24,643 --> 00:20:26,748
Emily, I gotta go.
ler, will you help me with my new chair?
347
00:20:26,812 --> 00:20:30,191
Sure thing.
What did you pay for this, Carol?
348
00:20:30,249 --> 00:20:33,321
- It was free.
- You were robbed.
349
00:20:35,754 --> 00:20:37,893
Well, we did pretty good, Bob.
350
00:20:37,957 --> 00:20:41,370
We got rid of almost everything, except now
we're gonna have to sit on the floor.
351
00:20:41,427 --> 00:20:45,170
- I'm not. I'm gonna get my chair back
from Howard. - Where am I gonna sit?
352
00:20:45,230 --> 00:20:47,836
Well, we'll find something.
Let's go across the hall and browse.
353
00:20:47,900 --> 00:20:51,040
No, honey. Bob.
I really don't want that old stuff back.
354
00:20:51,103 --> 00:20:54,414
- But I want my chair.
- I'm not sure Howard will sell it.
355
00:20:54,473 --> 00:20:57,750
- Well, we gotta go now.
- Already?
356
00:20:57,810 --> 00:21:00,416
Yeah. We left our kids
at a garage sale.
357
00:21:00,479 --> 00:21:04,086
- Yeah, just our luck, we won't sell 'em.
- [ Cackles]
358
00:21:04,149 --> 00:21:06,459
Oh, look, Maury, a refrigerator.
359
00:21:06,518 --> 00:21:10,864
Oh, yeah, yeah. Say, how much
do you want for the refrigerator?
360
00:21:10,923 --> 00:21:13,699
- It's not for sale.
- Look, everybody's got a price.
361
00:21:13,759 --> 00:21:17,138
- No, it's really not for sale.
- Well, come on. 250? 300?
362
00:21:17,196 --> 00:21:19,142
- What do you want? Tell me.
- A thousand dollars.
363
00:21:19,198 --> 00:21:23,237
- Nine hundred.
- Fine.
364
00:21:23,302 --> 00:21:25,942
No, no, no, Maury,
it doesn't even have an ice maker.
365
00:21:26,005 --> 00:21:28,246
Oh, well, then forget it.
366
00:21:30,409 --> 00:21:32,912
- How about these snow tires?
- $5,000.
367
00:21:32,978 --> 00:21:35,458
- What?
- Apiece.
368
00:21:36,515 --> 00:21:38,461
Come on, Dorothy.
369
00:21:41,453 --> 00:21:43,490
[Sarcastic Chuckle]
370
00:21:46,392 --> 00:21:49,066
Honey, you wanna go
to a movie tonight?
371
00:21:49,128 --> 00:21:51,734
Are you kidding,
and leave my chair?
372
00:21:51,797 --> 00:21:54,004
- [Knocking]
- Get that, will ya, honey?
373
00:21:54,066 --> 00:21:57,445
Oh, sure. I wouldn't want you
to leave your chair.
374
00:21:58,837 --> 00:22:00,874
Hi, guys. Come on in.
Make yourself at home.
375
00:22:00,939 --> 00:22:04,910
Oh. [Chuckles]
Kinda looks like home.
376
00:22:04,977 --> 00:22:07,253
Well, your stuff
looks great, doesn't it?
377
00:22:07,312 --> 00:22:10,259
- I want my chair back, Howard.
- [ Laughs]
378
00:22:11,817 --> 00:22:14,764
- How'd the sale go?
- Pretty good. We almost broke even.
379
00:22:14,820 --> 00:22:18,597
If we'd sold two snow tires for $10,000,
we would have come out ahead.
380
00:22:18,657 --> 00:22:21,638
- I want my chair, Howard.
- [ Laughs]
381
00:22:21,693 --> 00:22:24,674
I guess with all the antiques gone,
there's not much furniture over there now, huh?
382
00:22:24,730 --> 00:22:29,804
Well, look, if you'd like my lamp,
it's down in the locker.
383
00:22:29,868 --> 00:22:32,439
Get outta that chair, Howard.
384
00:22:34,473 --> 00:22:36,646
- You're serious, aren't you?
- I want my chair back.
385
00:22:36,708 --> 00:22:38,881
Hey, a deal's a deal.
You saw me give Emily the check.
386
00:22:38,944 --> 00:22:41,288
Get outta that chair, Howard!
387
00:22:41,346 --> 00:22:43,292
Okay. Okay.
388
00:22:43,348 --> 00:22:46,693
You can have your chair.
I'll sell it back to you for $80.
389
00:22:46,752 --> 00:22:50,199
Howard, you only paid 75 for it.
390
00:22:50,255 --> 00:22:52,201
Oh, yeah, that's right,
75, that's right.
391
00:22:52,257 --> 00:22:54,965
I'll sell it back to you for $75.
392
00:22:55,027 --> 00:22:58,565
And here's your change. It was in the chair.
Take that too. That's yours.
393
00:22:58,630 --> 00:23:02,043
- Keep the change, Howard.
- Thank you.
394
00:23:02,101 --> 00:23:04,513
Do you want me to help you
pick out some new furniture?
395
00:23:04,570 --> 00:23:07,016
No, no, no. Bob and I are gonna pick out
the new furniture together.
396
00:23:07,072 --> 00:23:09,382
- Aren't we, Bob?
- Right.
397
00:23:11,977 --> 00:23:13,923
Emily, get the chair.
398
00:23:17,883 --> 00:23:21,456
- [ Chattering]
- Oh, Bob, Bob, please.
399
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:24,967
I already had
two doughnuts this morning.
400
00:23:25,023 --> 00:23:29,199
Hey, Bob, that's really nice of you,
selling my snow tires door-to-door.
401
00:23:29,261 --> 00:23:32,208
Jerry, you were supposed to leave
your trunk unlocked sol could put the tires in.
402
00:23:32,264 --> 00:23:34,835
Oh, yeah.
Well, here are the keys.
403
00:23:34,900 --> 00:23:37,346
Well, here are the tires.
404
00:23:37,402 --> 00:23:40,076
Yeah. Carol, when you get a minute,
would you mind-
405
00:23:40,139 --> 00:23:42,881
- No.
- Or I could do it myself.
406
00:23:44,810 --> 00:23:46,756
[Elevator Dings]
407
00:23:48,413 --> 00:23:51,394
Say, would you like to buy
some snow tires from a '46 Hudson?
408
00:23:51,450 --> 00:23:55,592
No. Do you want to
buy a coconut carved like a monkey?
409
00:23:55,654 --> 00:23:57,895
- No.
- Oh.
410
00:24:00,192 --> 00:24:02,138
Well, Mr. Herd, how was Hawaii?
411
00:24:02,194 --> 00:24:05,869
Oh, a typical tropical paradise.
I hated it.
412
00:24:05,931 --> 00:24:09,879
- Did you get to the beach?
- Yeah, but I sat with my back to the ocean.
413
00:24:09,935 --> 00:24:11,812
That's showin' 'em.
414
00:24:11,870 --> 00:24:14,646
Well, I guess that means
you'll be leaving the coconut company.
415
00:24:14,706 --> 00:24:16,652
No, no, I'm gonna be staying
right here in Chicago.
416
00:24:16,708 --> 00:24:19,086
- I'm gonna be in charge of the macaroon division.
- Good.
417
00:24:19,144 --> 00:24:21,420
No, I can't think of anything worse
than living in Hawaii.
418
00:24:26,485 --> 00:24:28,829
Seems like a nice place
for a vacation though.
419
00:25:06,425 --> 00:25:08,234
[ Mews]
34771
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