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1
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RV
2
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"Once in every nighttime,
someone comes around."
3
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- "I'm coming to get you."
- No.
4
00:00:47,901 --> 00:00:51,101
"There's someone
that makes sleeping difficult."
5
00:00:53,901 --> 00:00:56,001
"Cassie."
6
00:00:57,301 --> 00:01:00,201
"I'm coming."
7
00:01:00,601 --> 00:01:02,001
Who's there?
8
00:01:03,401 --> 00:01:06,901
- "The Tickle Monster."
- No.
9
00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:12,401
"That's right, Sylvester Stallone
is the Tickle Monster."
10
00:01:12,501 --> 00:01:14,801
"I'm gonna tickle you."
11
00:01:15,301 --> 00:01:18,101
"What?"
"I'm gonna tickle you."
12
00:01:18,301 --> 00:01:20,201
"What?"
"I'm gonna tickle you!"
13
00:01:21,701 --> 00:01:23,301
Daddy, help.
14
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I'm here, Cassie.
Unhand my daughter, Tickle Monster.
15
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Oh, hand-to-hand.
16
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- Look, over there.
- Go, Daddy, go.
17
00:01:34,502 --> 00:01:36,202
"Oh, dear."
18
00:01:36,402 --> 00:01:38,302
- Is she still up?
- Yeah.
19
00:01:38,502 --> 00:01:40,102
Yeah, I just gave her a warm bath...
20
00:01:40,302 --> 00:01:42,202
...and now she's more wide-awake
than I am.
21
00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:45,802
She won't be so sharp
for her big meeting tomorrow.
22
00:01:46,002 --> 00:01:48,502
- Good night, sweetie.
- Night, Mommy.
23
00:01:49,602 --> 00:01:52,502
Well, if I can get Carl to sleep
in the next 10 minutes...
24
00:01:52,602 --> 00:01:55,802
...you might still have a shot tonight.
- Use a mallet if you have to.
25
00:01:55,902 --> 00:01:57,602
- Daddy?
- Yeah, baby?
26
00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:01,302
I'm never gonna get married.
27
00:02:01,502 --> 00:02:04,202
Why not? It's not as bad as it looks.
28
00:02:04,402 --> 00:02:07,202
Because I always want to live here
with you.
29
00:02:08,102 --> 00:02:11,502
Well, you know, one day,
you're gonna grow up...
30
00:02:11,702 --> 00:02:14,302
...meet a wonderful guy,
and you're gonna get married.
31
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:18,202
But you and I
will always be best friends.
32
00:02:22,903 --> 00:02:24,803
Good night, Cassie.
33
00:02:27,703 --> 00:02:29,703
Dad, could you be any more of a dork?
34
00:02:29,803 --> 00:02:32,803
Cassie, you know where this girl lives
or you just think you know?
35
00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:35,203
I know where,
I just know one way to get there.
36
00:02:35,303 --> 00:02:38,003
- And you refuse to go that way.
- Because it's a stupid way.
37
00:02:38,103 --> 00:02:41,503
- Lf you consider getting there stupid.
- Why don't you use the navigation?
38
00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:45,103
Because Sacajawea back there
doesn't know the name of the street.
39
00:02:45,303 --> 00:02:48,003
She knows it as "the one
next to the one with the fountain."
40
00:02:48,203 --> 00:02:50,103
Hey, Dad,
Cassie just gave you the finger.
41
00:02:50,203 --> 00:02:52,203
If we don't find this house
in two minutes...
42
00:02:52,303 --> 00:02:53,703
- There it is.
- Okay, honey...
43
00:02:53,803 --> 00:02:55,303
...hurry up, go get your friend.
44
00:02:55,403 --> 00:02:57,403
- Jerk.
- I heard that.
45
00:02:57,603 --> 00:02:58,903
Good.
46
00:03:01,503 --> 00:03:03,903
- Where are they?
- She just left.
47
00:03:04,103 --> 00:03:05,403
Okay.
48
00:03:06,303 --> 00:03:08,203
Which friend is this, the nice one?
49
00:03:08,403 --> 00:03:10,103
You used to know all her friends.
50
00:03:10,203 --> 00:03:12,403
- You were funny and charming.
- Well, she's 15.
51
00:03:12,603 --> 00:03:15,204
She doesn't want me to be charming.
She finds it creepy.
52
00:03:15,404 --> 00:03:16,604
Oh, no.
53
00:03:16,804 --> 00:03:18,604
It's the too-nice one.
54
00:03:18,804 --> 00:03:20,304
Hi, thanks for inviting me.
55
00:03:20,504 --> 00:03:22,304
Any friend of Cassie's
is always welcome.
56
00:03:22,504 --> 00:03:24,104
We're a little late.
57
00:03:27,204 --> 00:03:29,604
Remember, congratulate Todd
on the Alpine soda merger...
58
00:03:29,804 --> 00:03:32,204
...tell him the house looks great,
work in his outfit.
59
00:03:32,404 --> 00:03:34,104
- Maybe he smells nice.
- Lick his face?
60
00:03:34,304 --> 00:03:36,104
No, don't touch him.
Don't shake his hand.
61
00:03:36,304 --> 00:03:38,804
- Oh, right, Mr. Stupid-Germ-Phobia.
- Yeah.
62
00:03:39,004 --> 00:03:41,904
There they are, old Bob Bobcat.
63
00:03:42,104 --> 00:03:44,404
- Teabag.
- Hi, Todd.
64
00:03:44,604 --> 00:03:46,504
Hi. Hi.
65
00:03:46,704 --> 00:03:48,604
Well, congratulations on Alpine soda.
66
00:03:48,804 --> 00:03:50,804
- Bob said you'd do it.
- Yeah.
67
00:03:51,004 --> 00:03:53,504
God, Jamie, if my ex-wife
looked as good as you...
68
00:03:53,704 --> 00:03:56,704
...l'd still be in the middle
of a horrible marriage.
69
00:03:59,004 --> 00:04:02,704
Thank you, Todd.
What a lovely compliment.
70
00:04:03,604 --> 00:04:05,104
Oh, there's Laird.
71
00:04:05,804 --> 00:04:07,004
Laird.
72
00:04:07,604 --> 00:04:09,504
- So that's the young hotshot?
- Yeah.
73
00:04:09,704 --> 00:04:11,805
Harvard M.B.A.
We're planning to kill him.
74
00:04:11,905 --> 00:04:13,405
Do you want in?
75
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:16,205
- Cassie.
- There he is.
76
00:04:16,405 --> 00:04:20,405
Laird. You know what'd be great?
You going to get me shrimp.
77
00:04:21,205 --> 00:04:23,105
I'm not joking.
78
00:04:24,105 --> 00:04:26,805
Cass, go say hi to Todd.
79
00:04:27,005 --> 00:04:29,105
- What for?
- He likes you. I'll give you 20 bucks.
80
00:04:29,305 --> 00:04:31,405
Can I come?
I read all about him online.
81
00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,505
Okay.
82
00:04:33,705 --> 00:04:35,105
Okay.
83
00:04:37,005 --> 00:04:39,905
Hi, Mr. Mallory.
Good to see you again.
84
00:04:40,705 --> 00:04:44,205
- Oh, Cassie Munro.
- Little Cassie?
85
00:04:44,805 --> 00:04:46,605
Wow, you turned into quite
the young lady.
86
00:04:46,805 --> 00:04:48,205
This is my friend, Gretchen.
87
00:04:48,305 --> 00:04:49,605
- Hi, Gretch.
- Hi.
88
00:04:49,805 --> 00:04:53,505
Aren't you the one who got
Pure Vibe sodas into the schools?
89
00:04:53,705 --> 00:04:56,805
That was me. Cassie's dad helped,
he's head of Corporate Relations...
90
00:04:56,905 --> 00:04:58,505
...but I am el presidente.
91
00:04:58,705 --> 00:05:01,305
Wow, so you're, like,
personally responsible...
92
00:05:01,505 --> 00:05:03,805
...for destroying the health
of millions of children.
93
00:05:04,005 --> 00:05:06,206
- Gretchen.
- I probably wouldn't put it that way.
94
00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:08,806
Obesity, diabetes, cholesterol.
95
00:05:09,006 --> 00:05:12,506
The fat of our youth is on your hands.
Wallow in it.
96
00:05:28,306 --> 00:05:31,106
Thank you, I had a very nice time.
97
00:05:34,406 --> 00:05:36,106
Keep it real.
98
00:05:37,506 --> 00:05:39,306
Don't.
99
00:05:49,506 --> 00:05:52,306
Yo, homeslice,
can you chill on the def jam?
100
00:05:52,506 --> 00:05:54,606
You're boiling my vibe.
101
00:05:54,806 --> 00:05:56,706
Respect.
102
00:05:58,706 --> 00:06:00,306
Cass, can we talk?
103
00:06:00,406 --> 00:06:03,607
- God, what?
- Nothing. My bad.
104
00:06:03,707 --> 00:06:07,207
Father evil. Forgot that.
105
00:06:07,407 --> 00:06:08,907
How you doing, are you all right?
106
00:06:09,007 --> 00:06:11,907
- No, not really.
- Why don't you get that skin peel?
107
00:06:12,607 --> 00:06:14,407
Feels like that.
Cassie was so abrasive...
108
00:06:14,607 --> 00:06:18,107
Oh, Bob just came in.
Let me call you back. My sister.
109
00:06:18,807 --> 00:06:20,707
- Did you talk to Cassie?
- Yeah, I tried.
110
00:06:20,807 --> 00:06:22,107
Still bleeding a little bit.
111
00:06:22,207 --> 00:06:24,107
She didn't know Gretchen
was gonna do that.
112
00:06:24,307 --> 00:06:27,807
She didn't know her friend was gonna
throw a vat of schmaltz on my boss.
113
00:06:28,607 --> 00:06:30,107
Wine or martini?
114
00:06:30,307 --> 00:06:33,007
- Both, with a Prozac back.
- Okay.
115
00:06:33,207 --> 00:06:36,507
Remember when it used to be
"Daddy's home"? Now nothing.
116
00:06:36,607 --> 00:06:38,407
We watch TV
in four separate rooms...
117
00:06:38,607 --> 00:06:40,607
...and we IM each other
when dinner's ready.
118
00:06:40,707 --> 00:06:42,307
Well, then let's change things.
119
00:06:42,507 --> 00:06:44,207
Let's start while we're in Hawaii.
120
00:06:44,407 --> 00:06:47,007
No laptop, no BlackBerry,
no business calls.
121
00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:48,707
- Let's really go.
- No what?
122
00:06:48,807 --> 00:06:51,207
You're not gonna see them
for the rest of the summer.
123
00:06:51,307 --> 00:06:53,007
- Carl's got camp...
- Yeah.
124
00:06:53,107 --> 00:06:55,407
Cassie's got college prep
in Palo Alto, I know.
125
00:06:55,507 --> 00:06:58,108
That's right, and they leave
the day after we get back.
126
00:06:58,308 --> 00:07:01,608
It'll be the same in Hawaii. They'll
only call us when they need money.
127
00:07:01,708 --> 00:07:05,208
Well, I'm glad we're going.
And don't worry so much about work.
128
00:07:05,308 --> 00:07:08,508
Todd loves you.
You're indispensable.
129
00:07:09,508 --> 00:07:10,608
I'm afraid not.
130
00:07:10,808 --> 00:07:13,808
I think Laird's gonna get my job.
He's younger, smarter, cheaper.
131
00:07:15,208 --> 00:07:16,608
What did you say?
132
00:07:16,908 --> 00:07:18,408
Nothing.
133
00:07:20,508 --> 00:07:22,508
Here you go.
134
00:07:23,508 --> 00:07:25,608
To true love.
135
00:07:26,708 --> 00:07:30,008
- Hawaii's gonna be great.
- Yeah.
136
00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:32,308
You gotta cancel Hawaii.
137
00:07:32,508 --> 00:07:34,708
- Why?
- We hit a snag in the Alpine merger.
138
00:07:34,908 --> 00:07:37,508
- Since yesterday?
- One brother got seller's remorse.
139
00:07:37,708 --> 00:07:39,108
- Garry.
- Larry.
140
00:07:39,308 --> 00:07:41,308
Garry's still for it.
Show him some money...
141
00:07:41,408 --> 00:07:43,408
...he'll quack like a duck.
Larry's nervous.
142
00:07:43,508 --> 00:07:46,208
If I tell my wife we're not going
to Hawaii, bury me ass-up.
143
00:07:46,408 --> 00:07:48,008
You have a place to park your bike.
144
00:07:48,108 --> 00:07:49,108
- Bob.
- Todd.
145
00:07:49,308 --> 00:07:50,308
- Bob.
- Todd.
146
00:07:50,508 --> 00:07:54,209
Bob. Bob,
this crisis has actually saved your job.
147
00:07:54,409 --> 00:07:56,509
- Really?
- After yesterday...
148
00:07:56,709 --> 00:08:00,609
...I figured I gotta fire you
to maintain some respect around here.
149
00:08:00,709 --> 00:08:03,609
But in light of this Alpine thing...
150
00:08:03,909 --> 00:08:05,809
...I still need you.
- Bless you, Todd.
151
00:08:06,009 --> 00:08:08,009
I gotta run out there
and make a presentation.
152
00:08:08,209 --> 00:08:11,009
I can write the presentation in Hawaii
and zap it to you.
153
00:08:11,209 --> 00:08:15,109
Laird can write me a presentation.
If I tell him to, he'll live in the office.
154
00:08:15,309 --> 00:08:17,009
He'll shower
in the damn water cooler.
155
00:08:17,209 --> 00:08:19,109
But you've got one thing
he hasn't got.
156
00:08:19,309 --> 00:08:21,809
- A soul.
- No, you're good in a meeting.
157
00:08:22,009 --> 00:08:23,609
You've got the chutzpah.
158
00:08:23,809 --> 00:08:25,909
So I want you
to write that presentation...
159
00:08:26,109 --> 00:08:28,709
...and I need you at the meeting
to put this thing over.
160
00:08:28,809 --> 00:08:30,809
- Yeah.
- So no Hawaii.
161
00:08:30,909 --> 00:08:34,309
- No.
- Boulder, Colorado, Friday.
162
00:08:34,409 --> 00:08:36,209
Just move your Hawaii dates.
163
00:08:36,409 --> 00:08:38,509
The kids are booked
the rest of the summer.
164
00:08:38,709 --> 00:08:41,309
- You have to go to Boulder.
- Agreed.
165
00:08:41,509 --> 00:08:45,509
I want you to know, after the divorce,
I'm coming after Jamie hard.
166
00:08:45,709 --> 00:08:47,109
Bring jewelry.
167
00:08:47,309 --> 00:08:49,710
Hey, if you get Jamie,
can I have Elaine?
168
00:08:49,810 --> 00:08:52,610
- You want Elaine?
- Better than nothing.
169
00:08:52,810 --> 00:08:54,710
Trust me, it's not better.
170
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,610
Elaine is still mad at me
for taking that vacation last year.
171
00:08:57,810 --> 00:08:59,810
Figures that's why
I didn't get that promotion.
172
00:09:00,010 --> 00:09:02,210
- Oh, the RV trip.
- RV trip?
173
00:09:02,310 --> 00:09:05,310
Oh, the famous RV trip.
Oh, can we see the pictures again?
174
00:09:05,510 --> 00:09:07,510
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Nobody move.
175
00:09:09,210 --> 00:09:11,210
Did you rent that RV?
176
00:09:18,210 --> 00:09:22,110
Mom, some idiot just parked
this ugly RV outside our house.
177
00:09:22,210 --> 00:09:23,710
What?
178
00:09:26,510 --> 00:09:28,810
Oh, my God, it's your husband.
179
00:09:31,810 --> 00:09:34,210
- Oh, hi.
- What is that?
180
00:09:35,610 --> 00:09:38,110
- It's an RV.
- And why is it in front of our house?
181
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:40,910
- We're taking it on vacation.
- To Hawaii?
182
00:09:41,010 --> 00:09:44,511
- No, it doesn't float. Colorado.
- What happened to Hawaii?
183
00:09:44,711 --> 00:09:47,911
Come on, Hawaii's
a winter destination. It's summer.
184
00:09:48,111 --> 00:09:51,011
The place I'm taking you is special,
and not like Uncle Mike.
185
00:09:51,211 --> 00:09:54,811
It's Lake Nirvana,
where I went with my parents as a kid.
186
00:09:54,911 --> 00:09:57,011
Is he being funny?
Because I can never tell.
187
00:09:57,211 --> 00:09:59,511
Oh, come on.
You've always wanted to camp, right?
188
00:09:59,611 --> 00:10:02,211
This is what he came up with
to punish me for Gretchen.
189
00:10:02,411 --> 00:10:04,711
I was gonna surf.
Nice one, Dad. Thanks.
190
00:10:04,911 --> 00:10:06,811
The hotel in Hawaii
has a weight room.
191
00:10:07,011 --> 00:10:10,111
Doesn't anybody
respect my lifting schedule?
192
00:10:14,011 --> 00:10:16,911
We're not campers. We don't camp.
193
00:10:17,111 --> 00:10:19,911
- Why not?
- Why...? Why not?
194
00:10:20,111 --> 00:10:23,011
- For one thing, we like to shower.
- Well, it's got a shower.
195
00:10:23,211 --> 00:10:25,411
You and I will go out right now
and take a shower.
196
00:10:25,611 --> 00:10:28,411
Bob, do you know where you stay
when you take an RV trip?
197
00:10:28,611 --> 00:10:30,311
- Where?
- RV camps.
198
00:10:30,511 --> 00:10:32,811
Honey, try to remember,
we're not friendly.
199
00:10:32,911 --> 00:10:34,611
In Hawaii, we'll never see the kids.
200
00:10:34,711 --> 00:10:36,611
This way,
we can spend time with them.
201
00:10:38,311 --> 00:10:39,812
You need to spend time with them.
202
00:10:40,012 --> 00:10:43,012
I spend nine hours a day with them.
And I want Hawaii.
203
00:10:43,112 --> 00:10:44,912
All right, we'll go to Hawaii.
204
00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:48,012
At Christmas. Then it will just be us
and a lot of Jewish people.
205
00:10:48,112 --> 00:10:50,812
- We'll have all the ham to ourselves.
- I'll have to cook.
206
00:10:51,012 --> 00:10:53,612
No, you won't, because I'll cook
every night, every meal.
207
00:10:53,812 --> 00:10:57,112
We were gonna take naps.
Hotel room, afternoon...
208
00:10:57,212 --> 00:11:00,012
...lock-the-door naps.
- Oh, the good naps.
209
00:11:00,112 --> 00:11:03,412
- How are we gonna do that in an RV?
- I'll drive slowly.
210
00:11:03,612 --> 00:11:06,412
- I was gonna get a massage.
- I'll give you a massage.
211
00:11:06,612 --> 00:11:08,912
You're gonna do all the cooking,
give me massages.
212
00:11:09,112 --> 00:11:10,412
And spend time with the kids.
213
00:11:10,612 --> 00:11:12,212
You got it.
214
00:11:13,612 --> 00:11:16,812
Did you cancel our Hawaii trip
because Todd told you to?
215
00:11:17,012 --> 00:11:20,012
Did you volunteer us
for some sort of experiment?
216
00:11:20,212 --> 00:11:23,112
The family travels around and drinks
nothing but Pure Vibe soda...
217
00:11:23,312 --> 00:11:24,612
...see if our teeth fall out?
218
00:11:24,812 --> 00:11:27,912
Honey, I'm running out of time
with my kids.
219
00:11:31,112 --> 00:11:34,112
Come on, baby. Why don't you
come out in the wilderness...
220
00:11:34,312 --> 00:11:36,713
...with your big, brawny man?
221
00:11:36,913 --> 00:11:39,813
Don't make me call
for my mail-order bride.
222
00:11:42,713 --> 00:11:44,613
Bob.
223
00:11:46,113 --> 00:11:48,713
Here's something your genius
husband probably overlooked.
224
00:11:48,813 --> 00:11:50,413
Four miles to the gallon?
225
00:11:50,613 --> 00:11:54,513
Gee, why don't we just stay home
and set fire to an oil field.
226
00:11:56,413 --> 00:11:58,413
There's an elegant touch.
227
00:12:00,813 --> 00:12:03,713
Or we could just travel around
in clown suits.
228
00:12:04,313 --> 00:12:08,313
I spent the night with my head
in the toilet. I'm sure it's contagious.
229
00:12:10,713 --> 00:12:14,513
All right, no more details.
Just e-mail me the new proposal.
230
00:12:18,413 --> 00:12:20,113
- That's my couch. Move.
- Make me.
231
00:12:25,613 --> 00:12:27,413
- This seat's better, anyway.
- Whatever.
232
00:12:44,114 --> 00:12:47,114
Welcome aboard, everybody.
Before we embark...
233
00:12:47,314 --> 00:12:50,014
...I think we should give
this beauty a name. Suggestions?
234
00:12:51,014 --> 00:12:52,614
The Big Turd.
235
00:12:53,414 --> 00:12:55,514
The Big Rolling Turd.
236
00:12:55,614 --> 00:12:58,714
In that spirit, we set forth.
237
00:13:35,915 --> 00:13:37,415
Make it so, Number One.
238
00:13:43,815 --> 00:13:45,715
Honey, are you sure know how to...?
239
00:13:45,915 --> 00:13:47,415
- Honey?
- Trust me, okay?
240
00:13:51,615 --> 00:13:53,115
Thanks.
241
00:13:54,415 --> 00:13:55,815
Oh, my God.
242
00:14:00,115 --> 00:14:02,215
- Honey, honey.
- What?
243
00:14:02,415 --> 00:14:04,815
- Oh, tree.
- Yeah, it's all right.
244
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:10,415
Honey?
245
00:14:10,615 --> 00:14:11,915
Honey. Honey.
246
00:14:12,115 --> 00:14:13,915
Oh, my God.
247
00:14:15,315 --> 00:14:16,815
- We're okay.
- Honey.
248
00:14:17,915 --> 00:14:20,115
Honey, tree! Tree!
249
00:14:21,716 --> 00:14:23,616
Honey, honey.
250
00:14:26,916 --> 00:14:29,916
- Honey.
- Okay.
251
00:14:38,216 --> 00:14:39,616
Anything else you want to hit?
252
00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,416
Do you want to go back?
We missed the neighbor's cat.
253
00:14:52,316 --> 00:14:54,916
You are 31 hours
from your destination.
254
00:14:55,016 --> 00:14:57,416
- What's that?
- RoadMate 700.
255
00:14:57,616 --> 00:15:00,016
- I call her "Lola."
- Make a right in 100 feet.
256
00:15:00,216 --> 00:15:01,416
Thank you, Lola.
257
00:15:01,616 --> 00:15:03,416
She's accurate to within 10 feet.
258
00:15:03,616 --> 00:15:05,816
- Go straight.
- No, Lola says take a right.
259
00:15:05,916 --> 00:15:08,016
- Well, mall traffic. Go straight.
- Fifty feet.
260
00:15:08,116 --> 00:15:11,816
- Yeah, but she said take a right.
- Well, I'm telling you to go straight.
261
00:15:12,316 --> 00:15:13,516
Twenty feet.
262
00:15:13,716 --> 00:15:16,016
- Choose.
- Baby, please.
263
00:15:16,216 --> 00:15:17,617
- Turn right.
- Choose.
264
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:20,117
- Dad!
- Turn right.
265
00:15:32,417 --> 00:15:34,217
My bad.
266
00:15:34,417 --> 00:15:36,817
- You are 30 hours and 59 minutes...
- Turn her off.
267
00:15:37,017 --> 00:15:39,217
- From your destination.
268
00:15:42,417 --> 00:15:43,817
Say, Dad, this is interesting.
269
00:15:44,017 --> 00:15:46,217
"Unsecured items
in an unlatched cabinet...
270
00:15:46,417 --> 00:15:49,617
...are a recipe for disaster."
Didn't you read this?
271
00:15:49,817 --> 00:15:53,117
No, I was too busy thinking
of all the ways we're gonna have fun.
272
00:15:53,317 --> 00:15:55,317
Dad, somebody's stealing the RV.
273
00:15:56,917 --> 00:15:58,417
No, Carl. Nobody's stealing it...
274
00:15:58,617 --> 00:16:00,617
...it's rolling backwards
with no one in it.
275
00:16:07,417 --> 00:16:08,817
Oh, yeah. Well, my bad.
276
00:16:09,017 --> 00:16:11,817
Yeah, well, yeah.
277
00:16:12,017 --> 00:16:13,418
- Thanks, Saul.
- Irv.
278
00:16:13,518 --> 00:16:14,818
- Irv.
- Not "Saul."
279
00:16:14,918 --> 00:16:17,318
I don't know where I got Saul.
280
00:16:17,718 --> 00:16:19,218
Well, thanks.
281
00:16:19,418 --> 00:16:20,618
- Good news.
- I'm adopted?
282
00:16:20,818 --> 00:16:23,918
Good one. No,
thanks to my technically proficient...
283
00:16:24,118 --> 00:16:26,318
...and charmingly amusing description,
Saul...
284
00:16:26,518 --> 00:16:31,118
- Irv.
- Irv, yeah. Irv the dealer...
285
00:16:31,318 --> 00:16:34,518
...said we damaged the parking-gear
interlock and the emergency brake.
286
00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:37,518
We had that little mishap, you know,
when Mom distracted me...
287
00:16:37,718 --> 00:16:39,418
...we were pulling out of the driveway?
288
00:16:39,618 --> 00:16:42,418
But the driving brakes,
the ones we use when we're moving...
289
00:16:42,618 --> 00:16:45,318
...they're fine.
They're not just fine, they're brilliant.
290
00:16:45,718 --> 00:16:47,718
All we have to do
is every time we park...
291
00:16:47,818 --> 00:16:50,418
...we have to put two big blocks
under the rear wheel.
292
00:16:50,618 --> 00:16:53,818
We'll be perfect. Thanks for the help.
Okay, everybody, come on.
293
00:16:53,918 --> 00:16:56,418
It'll be fun, let's go.
Miles and smiles.
294
00:16:56,618 --> 00:16:58,518
This is the worst
I've ever been treated.
295
00:16:58,718 --> 00:17:00,918
- Wait till you get married.
- Thank you.
296
00:17:01,118 --> 00:17:03,518
Everybody, let's get aboard
the Big Rolling Turd.
297
00:19:00,021 --> 00:19:01,721
That was easy.
298
00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:18,421
Now what do we do?
299
00:19:18,621 --> 00:19:21,321
Hey, I know, let's go to the beach
and go surfing.
300
00:19:22,121 --> 00:19:25,121
Wait a minute, I forgot.
We're not in Hawaii.
301
00:19:25,321 --> 00:19:28,321
We're where NASA faked
the moon landing.
302
00:19:29,021 --> 00:19:30,521
Wait a minute.
303
00:19:32,721 --> 00:19:36,721
Wait till you see this.
It's called a "pop-out."
304
00:19:41,121 --> 00:19:42,721
Hold on.
305
00:19:52,221 --> 00:19:54,121
Wow, where are you?
306
00:20:01,322 --> 00:20:04,522
- How cool is that?
- Macarena cool.
307
00:20:05,722 --> 00:20:06,822
Hey.
308
00:20:09,022 --> 00:20:12,222
You guys want to see a movie?
But where?
309
00:20:18,422 --> 00:20:20,822
Forgive my ignorance,
but don't you need to hook up...
310
00:20:21,022 --> 00:20:24,422
...the Big Rolling Turd
to the electricity for that?
311
00:20:25,522 --> 00:20:27,222
Yes, I do.
312
00:20:47,022 --> 00:20:50,222
I gotta take a crap.
Time to break in the pooper.
313
00:20:52,223 --> 00:20:54,623
You are so disgusting.
314
00:20:58,123 --> 00:21:01,723
Dad! The toilet's backed up!
315
00:21:12,823 --> 00:21:14,823
Carl, what did you eat?
316
00:21:15,023 --> 00:21:18,023
Dad, it's not mine.
317
00:21:23,323 --> 00:21:25,823
There's the problem,
sewage tank is overflowing.
318
00:21:26,023 --> 00:21:27,923
And it's not even our sewage,
it's leftover.
319
00:21:28,123 --> 00:21:29,723
It's not a national emergency.
320
00:21:29,923 --> 00:21:31,623
We'll go to where
you dump the sewage...
321
00:21:31,823 --> 00:21:34,023
...and we'll dump the dump.
Come on, let's all go.
322
00:21:34,223 --> 00:21:37,723
As appealing as that sounds,
I think I'm gonna pass. But thank you.
323
00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:40,923
And don't forget,
you're making dinner.
324
00:21:42,323 --> 00:21:45,123
Sure, I'd love to clean
somebody else's crap out of the RV...
325
00:21:45,323 --> 00:21:47,324
...instead of being in Hawaii.
326
00:21:49,424 --> 00:21:50,824
Can I come?
327
00:21:51,024 --> 00:21:54,224
Not only can you come,
you can dump the sewage.
328
00:21:54,424 --> 00:21:55,624
- Really?
- Yeah.
329
00:21:55,824 --> 00:21:59,224
It's gonna be a regular
Field of Dreams moment, buddy.
330
00:22:18,824 --> 00:22:20,624
Piece of cake.
331
00:22:54,425 --> 00:22:57,025
- Gonna be a while, mister?
- Oh, well, that depends.
332
00:22:57,225 --> 00:22:59,425
If I can get this hose attached
to this outlet...
333
00:22:59,625 --> 00:23:01,225
...l'll be right out of here.
334
00:23:02,025 --> 00:23:05,025
- What's the dealie?
- Guy needs to attach a hose.
335
00:23:05,225 --> 00:23:06,425
Doing it.
336
00:23:08,225 --> 00:23:10,325
- What's up?
- Trying to attach a hose.
337
00:23:10,525 --> 00:23:14,225
- Fella here's trying to hook up a hose.
- Maybe get on the loudspeaker.
338
00:23:14,425 --> 00:23:17,025
That there's the wrong hose.
It's that there one.
339
00:23:18,125 --> 00:23:19,425
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
340
00:23:19,625 --> 00:23:20,925
- It's got the coupling.
- Right.
341
00:23:21,125 --> 00:23:22,925
That one right there.
342
00:23:23,425 --> 00:23:26,325
- There you go.
- Okay.
343
00:23:29,225 --> 00:23:30,825
You need another hose.
344
00:23:32,425 --> 00:23:35,425
Yeah, I guess, but...
345
00:23:35,625 --> 00:23:37,926
It's long enough, but:
346
00:23:38,126 --> 00:23:40,126
Gotta get one of them
bayonet couplings.
347
00:23:40,326 --> 00:23:42,826
- He hasn't got one.
- He's got a Y-coupling right there.
348
00:23:43,026 --> 00:23:44,926
Yeah, that'll do the trick.
349
00:23:45,126 --> 00:23:46,926
Y-coupling?
350
00:23:47,026 --> 00:23:49,026
A Y-coupling.
351
00:23:49,126 --> 00:23:51,026
That's the Y. Oh, I see.
352
00:23:51,826 --> 00:23:53,726
- One potato.
- Alrighty.
353
00:23:53,826 --> 00:23:55,126
Two potato.
354
00:23:55,226 --> 00:23:57,526
- Okay, wait, oh.
- There we go.
355
00:23:57,626 --> 00:23:59,926
Listen,
I'm no expert in waste management...
356
00:24:00,126 --> 00:24:03,726
...but won't the fecal matter
come out the top hole there?
357
00:24:05,226 --> 00:24:07,826
No, you just gotta hold it
up in the air like this:
358
00:24:08,026 --> 00:24:10,726
There you go. Little bit higher.
There you go.
359
00:24:10,926 --> 00:24:13,226
- Oh, like that there.
- There you go.
360
00:24:13,426 --> 00:24:15,126
You sure this is gonna work?
361
00:24:15,326 --> 00:24:17,426
Heck, yeah, man.
It's basic hydraulics.
362
00:24:17,626 --> 00:24:18,926
Okay, Archimedes.
363
00:24:19,026 --> 00:24:20,326
Hey, Joe Joe.
364
00:24:23,526 --> 00:24:25,426
- Okay.
- Let her rip.
365
00:24:36,027 --> 00:24:37,827
Turn it off!
366
00:24:41,827 --> 00:24:44,527
- That sure didn't work.
- No.
367
00:24:44,727 --> 00:24:46,827
- We need a hose spreader.
- Who's got one?
368
00:24:47,027 --> 00:24:48,527
Gornicke, I think. I'll get it.
369
00:24:48,727 --> 00:24:50,427
- I'll get some music.
- Oh, no, please.
370
00:24:50,627 --> 00:24:52,027
And some of those tortilla chips.
371
00:24:52,227 --> 00:24:54,127
- We got some leftover sausages.
- Bring them.
372
00:24:54,327 --> 00:24:57,627
No, you folks don't need to have
a parade. I don't want to impose.
373
00:24:57,827 --> 00:24:59,327
Oh, no, no.
374
00:24:59,527 --> 00:25:02,827
We are gonna get this
fixed up for you, buddy.
375
00:25:08,427 --> 00:25:10,027
Sausages.
376
00:25:10,927 --> 00:25:13,027
Sausages.
377
00:25:14,027 --> 00:25:16,027
Sausages.
378
00:25:16,627 --> 00:25:18,627
- Right here, you want one?
- Yeah.
379
00:25:20,127 --> 00:25:23,527
There we go. That'll work.
380
00:25:23,627 --> 00:25:25,427
You sure this will hold?
381
00:25:25,527 --> 00:25:28,227
Hey, man, why would they sell you
a hose spreader...
382
00:25:28,427 --> 00:25:30,228
...if you couldn't spread the hose?
383
00:25:30,328 --> 00:25:32,428
It's getting old. Come on.
384
00:25:32,928 --> 00:25:34,228
Open it up, Joe Joe.
385
00:25:40,428 --> 00:25:42,528
It's blocked. I'll flush the line.
386
00:25:49,528 --> 00:25:52,128
- Hey, Dad.
- Son.
387
00:25:52,328 --> 00:25:54,528
Maybe now is the time
to confess to you that...
388
00:25:54,728 --> 00:25:57,228
...your dad's not the master
of all things.
389
00:25:57,928 --> 00:26:00,428
I got that when you started
taking advice from morons.
390
00:26:00,628 --> 00:26:03,028
Yeah. All we need is a banjo.
391
00:26:03,128 --> 00:26:08,128
Oh, man. He didn't even open it up
all the way.
392
00:26:12,228 --> 00:26:15,828
- See? No worries.
- Yup.
393
00:26:18,728 --> 00:26:19,928
- Hello.
- Bob.
394
00:26:20,128 --> 00:26:23,328
Hey, Todd.
Yeah, I'm still pretty sick.
395
00:26:23,728 --> 00:26:26,029
- Where's my presentation?
- Presentation?
396
00:26:26,229 --> 00:26:28,929
It's the best work I've done,
not to toot my own horn...
397
00:26:29,129 --> 00:26:32,529
- Yeah, you'll have it Thursday morning.
- Thursday?
398
00:26:32,729 --> 00:26:35,029
No, that's not soon enough.
Tomorrow will be great.
399
00:26:37,229 --> 00:26:38,829
Oh, I gotta go.
400
00:26:41,929 --> 00:26:43,629
Oh, dude, that is nasty.
401
00:26:44,929 --> 00:26:47,029
Don't worry, I'll get another hose.
402
00:26:47,129 --> 00:26:49,729
Fire in the hole!
403
00:27:25,630 --> 00:27:27,930
Here's where you made your
critical mistake.
404
00:27:28,030 --> 00:27:30,330
You listened to anything
Howie and Joe Joe said.
405
00:27:30,530 --> 00:27:33,730
Nice boys, but they're a couple pliers
short of a tool chest.
406
00:27:34,230 --> 00:27:37,430
They're not the ones covered
in fecal matter.
407
00:27:37,630 --> 00:27:39,530
That's a good point.
408
00:27:41,430 --> 00:27:43,330
Travis Gornicke.
409
00:27:46,930 --> 00:27:48,430
Bob Munro.
410
00:27:48,630 --> 00:27:50,330
Yeah, let's postpone
that handshake...
411
00:27:50,430 --> 00:27:52,330
...till we get you cleaned up.
- Yeah.
412
00:28:07,530 --> 00:28:10,330
You're clean enough to use
your own shower, Bob.
413
00:28:10,930 --> 00:28:12,530
The vehicle's all cleaned up, Daddy.
414
00:28:12,730 --> 00:28:14,630
- Oh, nice work, son.
- Thank you, boys.
415
00:28:14,730 --> 00:28:16,531
- You're welcome.
- No problem, Mr. Munro.
416
00:28:16,631 --> 00:28:19,831
- Look, can I offer you a...
- No, Bob, wouldn't think of it.
417
00:28:20,031 --> 00:28:21,831
- We're neighbors.
- Mom wants to know...
418
00:28:22,031 --> 00:28:23,331
What happened to you?
419
00:28:25,731 --> 00:28:27,731
He was covered in turd.
420
00:28:27,931 --> 00:28:29,831
Oh, I know the feeling.
421
00:28:30,131 --> 00:28:32,131
Mom wants to know when
you're cooking dinner.
422
00:28:32,331 --> 00:28:35,431
You tell your mother when I'm good
and ready, that's when.
423
00:28:35,831 --> 00:28:39,531
- I'll tell her.
- Tell her I'm good and ready.
424
00:28:39,731 --> 00:28:41,331
Well, thanks.
425
00:28:41,531 --> 00:28:44,831
Hey,
pleasure hosing you down, Bob.
426
00:28:45,031 --> 00:28:48,131
- Ditto.
- Why can't they have dinner with us?
427
00:28:48,731 --> 00:28:51,031
You know, aside from the stink,
I don't see why not.
428
00:28:51,231 --> 00:28:53,531
Why don't you come on over?
Tuesday's meatloaf.
429
00:28:53,731 --> 00:28:57,431
Then afterwards, we can sit around
and watch Ernest Goes to Jail.
430
00:28:57,631 --> 00:29:00,431
- It is funny.
- Well, it's a classic.
431
00:29:00,631 --> 00:29:04,231
- Yeah, we'll make a whole night of it.
- I wish I could.
432
00:29:04,331 --> 00:29:06,531
I promised my family
I'd make my special dish...
433
00:29:06,631 --> 00:29:09,231
...shish kebob.
- Oh, that's good.
434
00:29:09,331 --> 00:29:11,732
- Well, another time, then.
- Yeah, try to keep me away.
435
00:29:11,932 --> 00:29:13,832
Okay.
436
00:29:16,332 --> 00:29:17,832
Carl!
437
00:29:23,032 --> 00:29:26,032
- Honey, how's it going?
- Great, baby.
438
00:29:26,232 --> 00:29:29,632
Okay, well, how long?
Because we're starving.
439
00:29:30,732 --> 00:29:33,832
Four hours.
Maybe longer if you keep asking.
440
00:29:34,532 --> 00:29:37,032
- What?
- It's a small oven...
441
00:29:37,132 --> 00:29:40,832
...and I'm having to do the potatoes
with a hair dryer set on "high."
442
00:29:46,132 --> 00:29:49,332
Hey, who wants to go to a party?
443
00:29:55,432 --> 00:29:58,932
- Here we are. Hope we're not late.
- No!
444
00:29:59,132 --> 00:30:01,132
- Well, Bob said we were invited.
- Yeah.
445
00:30:01,632 --> 00:30:03,532
- Of course you were.
- Then here we are.
446
00:30:03,732 --> 00:30:06,032
- We're hungry.
- All right!
447
00:30:06,232 --> 00:30:08,833
- Mary Jo, our company's here.
- What company?
448
00:30:08,933 --> 00:30:12,033
The ones that are close enough
to hear you yelling, darling.
449
00:30:12,933 --> 00:30:14,633
- Well, hi.
- Hi.
450
00:30:14,833 --> 00:30:16,233
Honey, help me.
451
00:30:16,433 --> 00:30:18,233
- I've got you here, darling.
- Here you go.
452
00:30:18,433 --> 00:30:20,633
Let's see. Earl and Billy you met.
453
00:30:20,833 --> 00:30:23,233
- Hi, I'm Earl.
- And I'm not.
454
00:30:23,433 --> 00:30:26,833
My wife, Mary Jo,
and my daughter, Moon.
455
00:30:27,233 --> 00:30:29,033
Hey, y'all.
456
00:30:34,133 --> 00:30:38,733
Well, Moon, that's kind of a hippie
name, like Moon, Rainbow, Bong.
457
00:30:39,133 --> 00:30:40,633
She was named after Warren Moon.
458
00:30:40,733 --> 00:30:42,533
He was quarterback of the
Houston Oilers.
459
00:30:44,933 --> 00:30:47,633
Well, this is my wife, Jamie.
460
00:30:47,833 --> 00:30:50,733
Cassie, my daughter.
My son, Carl.
461
00:30:50,933 --> 00:30:53,633
Named after Karl Marx...
462
00:30:53,833 --> 00:30:56,533
...socialist, some would say
the father of modern communism.
463
00:31:00,633 --> 00:31:03,634
As I'm throwing up with the blood
pouring out of my eyes, you know...
464
00:31:03,834 --> 00:31:07,134
...I looked up and I said,
"Who is that lovely?"
465
00:31:07,234 --> 00:31:09,434
Next day, we were married
in Juarez.
466
00:31:09,634 --> 00:31:11,934
Nine months later... out popped Earl.
467
00:31:13,234 --> 00:31:15,434
So you got a boyfriend?
468
00:31:15,534 --> 00:31:18,834
- Yeah, actually, I'm engaged.
- Unlikely.
469
00:31:19,534 --> 00:31:21,334
So where are you guys from?
470
00:31:21,534 --> 00:31:23,234
Where do you hang your hat,
as it were.
471
00:31:23,434 --> 00:31:25,134
- Behind the wheel of that bus.
- Really?
472
00:31:25,334 --> 00:31:26,634
- Full-timer, U.S.A.
- Really?
473
00:31:27,134 --> 00:31:31,134
Well, how do Moon, Earl and not Earl
go to school?
474
00:31:31,334 --> 00:31:32,834
Home school.
475
00:31:33,734 --> 00:31:36,434
I hope you don't find
this next question too personal...
476
00:31:36,634 --> 00:31:39,434
...but how do you?
- Make a living? Various ways.
477
00:31:39,634 --> 00:31:43,034
Let's see. We made $25,000 when
we turned in Mary Jo's stepdad.
478
00:31:43,234 --> 00:31:44,834
In prison
he's getting help he needs.
479
00:31:45,434 --> 00:31:47,834
Oh, and I almost forgot,
Mary Jo makes a living.
480
00:31:48,034 --> 00:31:52,434
I mean, she earns $60,000 a year
without ever leaving that bus.
481
00:31:52,634 --> 00:31:54,634
Really? Hooking?
482
00:31:59,135 --> 00:32:02,835
- Funny.
- I'm a mobile sales rep for Happy Max.
483
00:32:03,035 --> 00:32:05,935
Y'all seen the infomercials
for our musical car horns?
484
00:32:06,035 --> 00:32:08,035
- No, I don't think we have.
- No.
485
00:32:08,235 --> 00:32:10,135
Billy White Shoes,
blow that horn.
486
00:32:10,335 --> 00:32:12,335
- Watch this.
- Wait for it.
487
00:32:12,535 --> 00:32:14,635
I love it every time.
488
00:32:19,535 --> 00:32:22,635
Wow, that's fantastic. That was...
489
00:32:23,135 --> 00:32:24,635
Jamie, are you
a stay-at-home mom?
490
00:32:24,835 --> 00:32:26,335
- Yes.
- When there's not a sale.
491
00:32:26,535 --> 00:32:28,135
Let me hook you up with Happy Max.
492
00:32:28,235 --> 00:32:30,435
I got a rep bag in the bus.
493
00:32:30,535 --> 00:32:32,635
Plus, I represent
Lovely Lily Beauty Products.
494
00:32:32,835 --> 00:32:36,235
- Mary Jo's a trained cosmetologist.
- Lf you're still here tomorrow...
495
00:32:36,335 --> 00:32:39,835
...l'm going to give you a complete,
free total makeover.
496
00:32:39,935 --> 00:32:42,735
A $39 package absolutely free.
497
00:32:42,835 --> 00:32:44,635
- Oh, that would be good, honey.
- No.
498
00:32:44,735 --> 00:32:48,035
You know what, I'm gonna work on you
the whole day tomorrow.
499
00:32:49,035 --> 00:32:51,935
- There you go, little lady.
- Oh, I'm sorry, I don't eat meat.
500
00:32:52,135 --> 00:32:54,636
I heard you talking.
That's why I brought you this here.
501
00:32:54,736 --> 00:32:57,036
- There ain't no meat in it.
- Oh, no meat?
502
00:32:57,436 --> 00:32:59,736
You here that? No meat.
Thank you. That's lovely.
503
00:32:59,836 --> 00:33:01,836
That's right. It's all organs.
504
00:33:03,236 --> 00:33:04,736
Deer organs. They're fresh too.
505
00:33:04,936 --> 00:33:07,936
I run him over this morning.
The rest of it's curing in the bedroom.
506
00:33:08,136 --> 00:33:11,336
But the stomach, brains and pancreas,
we just toss that into the stew...
507
00:33:11,436 --> 00:33:13,336
...because in this heat,
it doesn't keep.
508
00:33:13,936 --> 00:33:17,536
- Bathroom.
- Little lady...
509
00:33:27,236 --> 00:33:29,036
- There's my girl.
- Dad, can we please go?
510
00:33:29,236 --> 00:33:31,636
Yes. You know,
thank you so much for the invitation.
511
00:33:31,836 --> 00:33:34,736
This has been great. A lot of fun.
512
00:33:34,836 --> 00:33:36,936
Dad, listen.
513
00:33:38,336 --> 00:33:40,136
This is kind of our family theme song.
514
00:33:40,336 --> 00:33:44,236
Kids, come on. Get up there, go, go.
Hurry up, get the... You know.
515
00:33:44,436 --> 00:33:46,236
Oh, they're gonna love this.
516
00:33:46,436 --> 00:33:49,037
Little Mommy's got a whole
song-and-dance thing worked out.
517
00:33:49,237 --> 00:33:51,637
- Oh, that's wonderful.
- Come on, Moon, come on.
518
00:33:51,737 --> 00:33:53,637
- Here I go. Thank you, darling.
- Thank you.
519
00:33:53,837 --> 00:33:57,137
- Oh, yeah.
- Line up the way we practiced.
520
00:34:59,838 --> 00:35:03,138
I never grow tired of that song.
Last time I heard it I was buck-naked...
521
00:35:03,338 --> 00:35:05,438
...in a field with a road flare.
- Dad.
522
00:35:05,638 --> 00:35:07,038
Yes. Big travel day tomorrow.
523
00:35:07,238 --> 00:35:08,738
- Where y'all headed?
- Away.
524
00:35:08,838 --> 00:35:10,938
Mount Watson in Colorado.
525
00:35:11,138 --> 00:35:13,938
- Just fantastic to have met you both.
- Same here.
526
00:35:14,138 --> 00:35:16,538
- Hope we see you again.
- How about breakfast tomorrow?
527
00:35:16,738 --> 00:35:21,538
- Bagels and deer testicles?
- Oh, yeah, she's funny, just like you.
528
00:35:23,038 --> 00:35:25,138
We'd have breakfast,
but we're early risers.
529
00:35:25,338 --> 00:35:28,338
- Well, us too. Six a.m. Work for you?
- We'll be long gone by then.
530
00:35:28,538 --> 00:35:30,538
Yeah, trust us.
531
00:35:35,238 --> 00:35:37,538
Bob? Bob?
532
00:35:37,738 --> 00:35:40,039
- Let's go, let's go. Bob?
- Yeah, baby.
533
00:35:40,639 --> 00:35:43,739
- Oh, friendly folks.
- Yeah, they're nice people.
534
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:48,940
- Hi, Mr. Munro.
- Hi, Billy. I'm just...
535
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:53,340
- You sure got a nice one.
- What?
536
00:36:53,540 --> 00:36:55,640
That's a nice laptop.
537
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:59,240
Oh, thanks. What are you doing up?
538
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:02,940
I have a sleep disorder.
I haven't slept since I was 5.
539
00:37:03,140 --> 00:37:05,340
So you just wander around
the campground.
540
00:37:05,540 --> 00:37:09,940
Yeah, I don't really mind.
It's the only time I have alone.
541
00:37:10,940 --> 00:37:14,040
Well, see you.
542
00:37:37,941 --> 00:37:39,841
Oh, okay.
543
00:38:15,041 --> 00:38:18,441
- Morning.
- Good morning, Mr. Munro.
544
00:38:33,142 --> 00:38:35,342
- Come on. Come on, let's go.
- It's 5:30.
545
00:38:35,542 --> 00:38:37,542
The Gornickes.
546
00:38:38,442 --> 00:38:40,542
Bob, a little help.
547
00:38:41,342 --> 00:38:43,442
Little help? Cassie?
548
00:38:43,642 --> 00:38:47,042
There's movement.
She... She's moving.
549
00:38:47,142 --> 00:38:49,642
Carl, let's get going.
550
00:38:52,942 --> 00:38:56,342
Let's move it, let's move it.
Bob, gun it.
551
00:38:57,042 --> 00:38:59,642
Carl. Cass, what's our status?
552
00:38:59,842 --> 00:39:03,242
She's out the door. She's coming.
Mayday, mayday, she's coming!
553
00:39:04,342 --> 00:39:07,742
Come on. Let's go, let's go.
Go, go, go!
554
00:39:10,542 --> 00:39:12,542
- Come on!
- It's in gear, but it's not moving.
555
00:39:14,042 --> 00:39:16,742
- The wheel!
- This stupid pop-out thing.
556
00:39:19,042 --> 00:39:20,742
Hurry, Mom, she's coming!
557
00:39:33,943 --> 00:39:35,443
Come on, come on, come on.
558
00:39:36,943 --> 00:39:38,743
Will you move this son of a bi...
559
00:39:44,843 --> 00:39:46,143
Hey!
560
00:40:02,943 --> 00:40:04,643
They are early risers.
561
00:40:24,544 --> 00:40:26,944
I'm going a whole 12 miles an hour.
562
00:40:27,144 --> 00:40:28,844
Then pass him.
563
00:40:35,644 --> 00:40:38,644
Kids, leave him alone.
He's not that good a driver.
564
00:40:42,944 --> 00:40:44,444
Really.
565
00:40:49,044 --> 00:40:51,044
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
566
00:40:57,144 --> 00:40:59,844
- Come on.
- Bob.
567
00:41:00,044 --> 00:41:03,244
Bob. Bob. Bob.
568
00:41:07,644 --> 00:41:08,944
Bob.
569
00:41:17,445 --> 00:41:18,645
All right.
570
00:41:19,345 --> 00:41:22,745
- Okay. All right.
- Thanks.
571
00:41:23,945 --> 00:41:25,245
- Hey, guess what.
- What?
572
00:41:25,445 --> 00:41:27,145
We need gas.
573
00:41:28,145 --> 00:41:29,845
And I really have to go
to the bathroom.
574
00:41:30,045 --> 00:41:31,645
You know we have one of those.
575
00:41:31,845 --> 00:41:34,445
Yeah, but after my last little
shower of sadness...
576
00:41:34,645 --> 00:41:37,345
Okay, okay, do what you have to do.
577
00:41:37,745 --> 00:41:40,345
I've got an ICBM coming.
578
00:41:42,345 --> 00:41:45,645
If there's a poop fairy,
I can make a lot of money.
579
00:42:16,646 --> 00:42:20,646
I could be a while, baby.
It's an 80-gallon tank.
580
00:42:34,046 --> 00:42:35,246
Dad, you in here?
581
00:42:36,346 --> 00:42:38,046
Carl, I just need a minute.
582
00:42:38,246 --> 00:42:40,146
Sure, only the RV's rolling away.
583
00:42:41,246 --> 00:42:42,846
Be right out.
584
00:42:50,646 --> 00:42:52,646
- Hey, Bob.
- Travis.
585
00:42:52,846 --> 00:42:55,846
Yeah, I think you've got
a little problem with your vehicle.
586
00:42:56,046 --> 00:42:57,646
I'm no expert...
587
00:42:57,746 --> 00:43:00,646
...but it's your parking-gear
interlock and your emergency brake.
588
00:43:00,846 --> 00:43:02,446
- How did you?
- It's a miracle.
589
00:43:02,646 --> 00:43:05,047
We pulled in
the second it started rolling away.
590
00:43:05,147 --> 00:43:07,347
Isn't that something?
Wanna hear about the time...
591
00:43:07,547 --> 00:43:09,747
...Jesus saved us from a tornado?
- It's great.
592
00:43:09,947 --> 00:43:12,147
I'd love to,
but I was in the little boys' room...
593
00:43:12,347 --> 00:43:14,647
...taking care of business
when Carl interrupted...
594
00:43:14,747 --> 00:43:16,847
...but Jamie would love to hear it.
595
00:43:17,047 --> 00:43:19,247
Well, it seems just like yesterday.
596
00:43:51,247 --> 00:43:52,847
Thank you.
597
00:43:54,747 --> 00:43:56,947
I don't wanna get too big,
you know.
598
00:43:57,147 --> 00:44:02,048
- I mean, I don't want to look freakish.
- No.
599
00:44:06,248 --> 00:44:08,448
- What is this?
- It's a list of places...
600
00:44:08,648 --> 00:44:11,248
...between here and Colorado
that sell organic health food.
601
00:44:11,348 --> 00:44:15,848
- I got it last night off the Internet.
- Oh, that was really thoughtful.
602
00:44:16,048 --> 00:44:19,248
- What are you listening to?
- Nothing.
603
00:44:19,448 --> 00:44:21,348
So Billy was blown
right out of that tree.
604
00:44:21,548 --> 00:44:23,948
Right before he hit the ground,
from out of nowhere...
605
00:44:24,148 --> 00:44:26,048
...comes this queen-size
Simmons mattress...
606
00:44:26,248 --> 00:44:28,348
...slides right under him
and cushions his fall.
607
00:44:28,548 --> 00:44:30,748
Saved his life.
Plus, we needed the mattress.
608
00:44:30,948 --> 00:44:32,448
I have a bad back.
609
00:44:32,648 --> 00:44:35,248
So you folks wanna join us
for breakfast?
610
00:44:35,348 --> 00:44:36,648
- We...
- Ate.
611
00:44:36,748 --> 00:44:38,848
Mr. Munro,
I was just telling Earl and Moon...
612
00:44:39,048 --> 00:44:40,848
...about that neat laptop
you were using.
613
00:44:41,248 --> 00:44:43,648
- When were you using a laptop?
- At work, all the time.
614
00:44:43,748 --> 00:44:45,848
- I was just telling him...
- When did he see you?
615
00:44:46,048 --> 00:44:48,048
You know,
we'd love to join you for breakfast.
616
00:44:51,748 --> 00:44:54,548
- Somebody's ripe.
- Welcome to my world.
617
00:44:55,949 --> 00:44:58,349
You guys go on in, get that table.
We'll be right there.
618
00:44:58,549 --> 00:45:00,849
All right. Come on, kids.
619
00:45:05,849 --> 00:45:07,249
- We're ditching them?
- Absolutely.
620
00:45:07,449 --> 00:45:09,449
- Okay.
- Kids, move.
621
00:45:11,949 --> 00:45:14,449
So because you told them
we were early risers...
622
00:45:14,649 --> 00:45:16,149
...we had to get up at 5:30...
623
00:45:16,349 --> 00:45:17,949
...to avoid the Gornickes...
- Right.
624
00:45:18,049 --> 00:45:19,749
...which we managed not to do
anyway...
625
00:45:19,949 --> 00:45:23,749
...because you refused to use the
bathroom on the RV that you rented.
626
00:45:23,949 --> 00:45:26,249
You're determined
to have a bad time, aren't you?
627
00:45:26,449 --> 00:45:27,549
We all are, Dad.
628
00:45:28,549 --> 00:45:32,549
Not me. I embrace every challenge.
629
00:45:42,749 --> 00:45:45,449
Honey, maybe they just got
some bad news and had to leave.
630
00:45:45,649 --> 00:45:48,649
You're a sweet woman, Mary Jo.
It's what I love about you.
631
00:45:48,849 --> 00:45:50,849
But them folks ditched us.
632
00:45:54,250 --> 00:45:57,450
Oh, Trav, honey, pull over.
Let's pull over.
633
00:45:57,950 --> 00:46:00,350
He looks like a folk singer.
634
00:46:01,250 --> 00:46:02,550
- Climb aboard.
- Hello there.
635
00:46:02,750 --> 00:46:04,250
- How you doing, buddy?
- Sir.
636
00:46:04,450 --> 00:46:06,050
Welcome to the Gornicke bus.
637
00:46:06,950 --> 00:46:09,050
You a folk singer?
638
00:46:31,250 --> 00:46:33,350
Cass,
can you turn on the oven for me?
639
00:46:33,550 --> 00:46:35,350
I am so bored.
640
00:46:35,550 --> 00:46:37,650
I could actually throw up
from how bored I am.
641
00:46:37,850 --> 00:46:41,550
I brought games.
Sorry! , Monopoly, Twister.
642
00:46:41,650 --> 00:46:44,150
- Come on, it'll be fun.
- Fun.
643
00:46:44,250 --> 00:46:45,350
Did you turn on the oven?
644
00:46:45,550 --> 00:46:47,251
- No.
- I'll do it.
645
00:46:54,051 --> 00:46:56,051
- Raccoon in the oven!
- Oh, please. No.
646
00:46:56,151 --> 00:46:57,451
Don't open it.
647
00:47:02,851 --> 00:47:04,851
Did you take out the roast
from last night?
648
00:47:05,051 --> 00:47:07,051
- I guess not.
- What's the plan?
649
00:47:07,151 --> 00:47:08,751
Give him Carl. Maybe he'll eat him.
650
00:47:08,951 --> 00:47:10,751
Give him you.
He's on the South Bitch Diet.
651
00:47:10,951 --> 00:47:12,551
- Good one.
- Okay, hey.
652
00:47:12,751 --> 00:47:15,151
Hey, come on. Don't you see
what the raccoon's doing?
653
00:47:15,251 --> 00:47:17,851
He's playing head games.
He wants to divide and conquer us.
654
00:47:18,051 --> 00:47:19,751
We have to hang together,
stay strong.
655
00:47:19,851 --> 00:47:22,151
- Just get rid of it.
- Just me?
656
00:47:22,251 --> 00:47:25,051
- Yeah.
- Okay.
657
00:47:29,051 --> 00:47:30,751
Come on, Blue.
There's coons in there.
658
00:47:30,951 --> 00:47:32,251
- Come on, boy.
- Bob.
659
00:47:32,451 --> 00:47:35,351
- Go get him, boy.
- Bob.
660
00:47:46,052 --> 00:47:47,652
Just kidding.
661
00:47:48,852 --> 00:47:50,452
I'm going in.
662
00:47:52,552 --> 00:47:53,752
Is anyone gonna stop me?
663
00:47:53,952 --> 00:47:56,252
"Dad, don't.
The raccoon might have rabies"?
664
00:47:56,352 --> 00:47:57,852
Nothing? Not a word?
665
00:47:58,452 --> 00:47:59,752
Not really.
666
00:48:03,552 --> 00:48:05,252
- Daddy?
- Yeah, baby.
667
00:48:06,152 --> 00:48:08,152
Don't hurt him.
668
00:48:15,752 --> 00:48:19,252
I am entering the RV.
669
00:48:21,352 --> 00:48:23,152
Still no sign.
670
00:48:23,352 --> 00:48:26,652
I'm going towards the oven door.
671
00:48:27,052 --> 00:48:30,252
I'm opening the ov...
672
00:48:30,452 --> 00:48:33,152
Oh, my God!
673
00:48:34,152 --> 00:48:36,252
There's more than one!
674
00:48:38,052 --> 00:48:39,553
You guys, he's just joking around.
675
00:48:49,853 --> 00:48:51,353
Get back.
676
00:48:51,853 --> 00:48:53,653
Back. Back! Back!
677
00:48:53,853 --> 00:48:55,553
You hideous...
678
00:48:59,853 --> 00:49:01,553
We need a new plan.
679
00:49:26,453 --> 00:49:29,653
All right, let's go.
You're off the Gornicke bus.
680
00:49:29,853 --> 00:49:31,153
I didn't steal it. I found it.
681
00:49:31,353 --> 00:49:34,154
Well, now you lost it.
682
00:49:38,754 --> 00:49:40,554
That's why they didn't
come to breakfast.
683
00:49:40,754 --> 00:49:43,954
He lost his computer, he needs it.
They went off frantic to find it.
684
00:49:44,054 --> 00:49:46,054
I was quick to think the worst.
685
00:49:46,254 --> 00:49:48,354
I'm filled with chagrin.
686
00:49:49,254 --> 00:49:50,754
Oh, honey.
687
00:49:52,854 --> 00:49:54,554
- What is that?
- It's a stink bomb.
688
00:49:54,954 --> 00:49:57,054
Got it from the guy in the office.
Cost me $ 175.
689
00:49:57,254 --> 00:49:59,454
I can get this for five bucks online,
I know it.
690
00:49:59,554 --> 00:50:01,354
You're gonna set that off in the RV?
691
00:50:01,554 --> 00:50:04,754
He assured me it's not toxic.
Just noxious, like Grandpa Ted.
692
00:50:06,054 --> 00:50:07,454
Don't litter.
693
00:50:11,454 --> 00:50:13,654
Suck on this, Rocky.
694
00:50:20,054 --> 00:50:21,554
Yeah!
695
00:50:23,454 --> 00:50:25,254
Run, critters.
696
00:50:25,454 --> 00:50:28,254
Yeah, there's more where
that came from, you little bandits.
697
00:50:28,454 --> 00:50:30,055
Yeah!
698
00:50:31,855 --> 00:50:35,055
I'm not so ill-equipped to handle an
emergency as some people may think.
699
00:50:35,155 --> 00:50:37,955
- No one said you were ill-equipped.
- You know it, baby.
700
00:50:38,155 --> 00:50:39,655
How long does this last?
701
00:50:41,355 --> 00:50:43,355
Up to six hours.
702
00:50:45,355 --> 00:50:49,355
It's a beautiful evening.
Let's sit outside and enjoy nature.
703
00:50:54,355 --> 00:50:56,755
Why don't we huddle
under the awning?
704
00:50:56,955 --> 00:50:59,955
Oh, we can't.
Dad tore it off back in Nevada.
705
00:51:00,155 --> 00:51:02,455
Well, why don't we just
get underneath the umbrella?
706
00:51:02,655 --> 00:51:05,155
Oh, that's right.
Dad fed it to the raccoons.
707
00:51:05,555 --> 00:51:09,355
- Please, try the office again.
- No, he's an idiot.
708
00:51:09,555 --> 00:51:13,255
He won't let us in.
He charged me $ 70 for these bags.
709
00:51:13,455 --> 00:51:15,755
What about that bar
we passed on the way up here?
710
00:51:16,455 --> 00:51:18,855
- Yeah, Dad, pizza.
- And a roof.
711
00:51:19,055 --> 00:51:22,955
No, it's dark out there. Besides,
those raccoons could be waiting.
712
00:51:29,856 --> 00:51:33,856
Hey! I can see it.
It's just down there.
713
00:51:34,356 --> 00:51:35,856
Come on, I'm starving.
714
00:51:36,356 --> 00:51:38,756
- Bob?
- It's a bad idea.
715
00:51:38,956 --> 00:51:40,556
It's just down the...
716
00:51:43,156 --> 00:51:44,356
Carl!
717
00:51:46,056 --> 00:51:48,356
Carl, we're coming!
718
00:51:52,256 --> 00:51:53,756
Bob!
719
00:51:53,956 --> 00:51:55,456
Mom!
720
00:51:58,256 --> 00:51:59,656
Jamie!
721
00:52:02,556 --> 00:52:04,156
Bob!
722
00:52:04,756 --> 00:52:06,156
Bob!
723
00:52:33,757 --> 00:52:35,957
Table for four. No smoking.
724
00:52:36,857 --> 00:52:38,857
Wipe your feet.
725
00:52:44,157 --> 00:52:45,557
See? That's why you should study.
726
00:52:45,757 --> 00:52:48,257
So you can get good grades
and go to a big party school.
727
00:52:49,457 --> 00:52:52,157
Hey, Dad, how come you never
got a pool table for the house?
728
00:52:52,357 --> 00:52:54,357
Because of the generalissimo
over there.
729
00:52:54,457 --> 00:52:56,957
We had one before you were born,
in the dining room...
730
00:52:57,057 --> 00:52:59,657
...but then you get a job,
invite people for dinner...
731
00:52:59,757 --> 00:53:01,857
...you have a family...
- Life used to be fun.
732
00:53:02,057 --> 00:53:05,057
It was fun. But then something
happened that was a lot more fun.
733
00:53:05,157 --> 00:53:07,357
We got the George Foreman
smokeless grill.
734
00:53:07,557 --> 00:53:08,757
Okay.
735
00:53:16,858 --> 00:53:19,658
It's fine. Let's just go to sleep.
736
00:53:21,258 --> 00:53:22,958
Dad.
737
00:55:46,060 --> 00:55:47,960
Oh, yeah.
738
00:55:53,760 --> 00:55:56,960
Oh, great, you're up.
Will you make the coffee?
739
00:55:57,360 --> 00:55:59,960
- Love to.
- Thank you.
740
00:56:16,561 --> 00:56:17,961
Do you want me to drive?
741
00:56:24,261 --> 00:56:26,461
- You okay, Dad?
- Oh, yeah.
742
00:56:54,261 --> 00:56:55,461
Dad, emergency!
743
00:56:59,662 --> 00:57:00,862
Gornickes.
744
00:57:01,062 --> 00:57:02,662
I'll get their computer.
745
00:57:03,262 --> 00:57:05,462
I feel like that hitchhiker
in The Twilight Zone.
746
00:57:05,662 --> 00:57:08,162
What do they like about us?
We're not even that appealing.
747
00:57:08,362 --> 00:57:09,662
I'm not gonna spend my life...
748
00:57:09,862 --> 00:57:11,962
...going door to door,
selling musical car horns.
749
00:57:12,162 --> 00:57:14,362
- The Gornickes. I'll flag them down.
- Cassie!
750
00:57:17,662 --> 00:57:19,262
She got him.
751
00:57:21,562 --> 00:57:23,362
Munros!
752
00:57:23,962 --> 00:57:25,262
Munros!
753
00:57:25,762 --> 00:57:27,362
Bob! Jamie!
754
00:57:27,562 --> 00:57:29,762
It's the Gornickes.
755
00:57:29,962 --> 00:57:31,762
- Pretend to talk to me.
- Oh, yeah.
756
00:57:31,962 --> 00:57:34,262
Pull over! We've got your stuff!
757
00:57:34,462 --> 00:57:36,862
Munros. It's the Gornickes.
758
00:57:40,162 --> 00:57:43,862
Pull over. We have your computer.
759
00:57:44,862 --> 00:57:48,862
And a Happy Max bag.
Pull over.
760
00:57:49,562 --> 00:57:50,862
Kids, grab your paint guns.
761
00:57:50,962 --> 00:57:53,062
Pull ahead.
We'll put one across their bow.
762
00:57:53,262 --> 00:57:56,363
You know, seeing you drive this thing
is really turning me on.
763
00:57:58,063 --> 00:57:59,363
What?
764
00:57:59,563 --> 00:58:01,063
They've got guns!
765
00:58:03,563 --> 00:58:05,163
We've also got...
766
00:58:10,663 --> 00:58:12,563
You can come up now.
767
00:58:12,763 --> 00:58:14,463
Where did you learn
to drive like that?
768
00:58:14,663 --> 00:58:17,763
How do you think
I get the kids to school on time?
769
00:58:20,363 --> 00:58:23,663
What a shame. If we had their address,
we could just ship it to them.
770
00:58:23,763 --> 00:58:25,463
Well, we do know
where they're headed.
771
00:58:25,663 --> 00:58:28,363
Mount Watson, Colorado.
772
00:58:42,763 --> 00:58:44,563
You know,
if you wore clothes that fit...
773
00:58:44,763 --> 00:58:47,963
...you wouldn't look like a 10-year-old.
- It's how I roll.
774
00:58:54,164 --> 00:58:55,364
Oh, sweet.
775
00:58:55,564 --> 00:58:57,464
You say something, Frodo?
776
00:58:59,164 --> 00:59:01,264
I was just saying
how that guy Shaq'd you there.
777
00:59:01,464 --> 00:59:03,964
- We got two-on-two, right?
- Why don't you find...
778
00:59:04,164 --> 00:59:05,464
...an under-2-foot league.
779
00:59:05,664 --> 00:59:08,864
Why don't you trade that thing in
on top of your neck for a face.
780
00:59:10,264 --> 00:59:11,964
I'm gonna floss your rear.
781
00:59:13,964 --> 00:59:16,464
- Let's go, bring it. Come on.
- Yo, my mobile homeboys.
782
00:59:16,664 --> 00:59:19,164
- What's tripping in the wood?
- This termite belong to you?
783
00:59:19,364 --> 00:59:21,064
- Don't call...
- Yo, my man... Easy.
784
00:59:21,264 --> 00:59:23,464
This my man, C.
He's small, but ferocious.
785
00:59:23,664 --> 00:59:26,364
But you dogs, you're hardcore.
Where you from?
786
00:59:26,564 --> 00:59:29,664
- Scottsdale.
- Scottsdale, in the 'Zona.
787
00:59:29,964 --> 00:59:31,564
That's a hardcore 'hood.
788
00:59:31,964 --> 00:59:33,864
But you want to take on
my man C, here...
789
00:59:34,064 --> 00:59:35,564
...go ahead, because, you know...
790
00:59:35,664 --> 00:59:37,964
...he's fierce,
he gonna come up in your face...
791
00:59:38,164 --> 00:59:40,664
...he'll damage you.
You gonna walk away, maybe limp.
792
00:59:40,864 --> 00:59:44,064
But I say talk to the hand, call waiting,
because he's out. Boy is out.
793
00:59:44,264 --> 00:59:47,065
I can't restrains him. Because
I'm conversating you right now...
794
00:59:47,265 --> 00:59:50,565
...to give him a chance to cool down,
to get back to a realistic level...
795
00:59:50,765 --> 00:59:53,265
...as we were. Because we could be
chilling in our crib.
796
00:59:53,365 --> 00:59:56,165
Not just on this mobile home thing,
representing Malibu...
797
00:59:56,365 --> 00:59:58,065
...and Westwood, you know.
798
00:59:58,265 --> 01:00:00,965
Malling it, like we all can.
Boys to mensch.
799
01:00:01,165 --> 01:00:03,165
Pimp my Mercedes, call me back...
800
01:00:03,365 --> 01:00:05,365
...put you on hold.
You know what I'm saying?
801
01:00:06,865 --> 01:00:08,565
We gotta go.
802
01:00:08,765 --> 01:00:12,465
You better, man. Don't make me
call my lawyer, because I'll audit.
803
01:00:12,565 --> 01:00:15,265
Aren't you glad Dad came?
They were about to kick your butt.
804
01:00:15,465 --> 01:00:18,265
Carl.
That's not helpful. Carl.
805
01:00:19,165 --> 01:00:20,465
Carl.
806
01:00:20,665 --> 01:00:23,065
It occurs to me that you and I
haven't had too many...
807
01:00:23,265 --> 01:00:25,765
...7 th Heaven kind of dialogues
in the last year.
808
01:00:25,965 --> 01:00:28,865
- You're busy a lot.
- Yeah, but not too busy to notice...
809
01:00:29,065 --> 01:00:31,865
...that you are sensitive
about your size.
810
01:00:32,465 --> 01:00:35,365
I'll bet you $ 1000 right now
you'll grow up bigger than me.
811
01:00:35,465 --> 01:00:38,265
I've seen pictures of you when you
were my age. You were huge.
812
01:00:38,465 --> 01:00:41,666
- You were shaving already.
- Yeah, well, that's my point.
813
01:00:41,866 --> 01:00:43,466
See, I achieved maturity very early.
814
01:00:43,666 --> 01:00:45,866
I stopped growing
after the eighth grade.
815
01:00:46,066 --> 01:00:49,166
But you have the other body type.
You're like my friend John Vigoshi.
816
01:00:49,266 --> 01:00:52,366
When he was 16,
he had a 9-inch summer.
817
01:00:53,066 --> 01:00:54,366
How do you mean that?
818
01:00:54,566 --> 01:00:57,366
He grew very tall, very quickly,
and so will you.
819
01:00:57,566 --> 01:01:00,066
And you're being proactive.
You're lifting weights.
820
01:01:00,166 --> 01:01:02,366
And when you grow up big,
you know what we'll do?
821
01:01:02,566 --> 01:01:03,766
What?
822
01:01:03,966 --> 01:01:06,366
We'll enter father-son
extreme-fighting competitions.
823
01:01:06,566 --> 01:01:08,666
- All right.
- You'll have to push the wheelchair.
824
01:01:08,866 --> 01:01:10,966
But we'll get them high,
and we'll get them low.
825
01:01:15,666 --> 01:01:17,766
Coming at you a little heat right now.
826
01:01:18,566 --> 01:01:21,466
Give me a little heat there.
A little heat. A little pepper there.
827
01:01:21,666 --> 01:01:23,166
Hike! All right.
828
01:01:29,866 --> 01:01:31,166
What's up?
829
01:01:34,166 --> 01:01:36,767
Kids, dinner's gonna be a little late
because...
830
01:01:37,767 --> 01:01:40,467
Sorry. False alarm.
831
01:01:42,767 --> 01:01:45,267
- The buzzing is not me.
- Bob.
832
01:01:47,967 --> 01:01:49,867
- Hello.
- Before you hang up on me again...
833
01:01:50,067 --> 01:01:51,067
...we need to talk.
834
01:01:51,367 --> 01:01:53,267
I'm sorry, I can't hear you very well.
835
01:01:53,467 --> 01:01:55,467
Signal. No, no. Yeah.
836
01:01:55,667 --> 01:01:57,267
Hold on one second. The signal.
837
01:01:57,867 --> 01:02:00,967
Just a... Can you hear me now?
838
01:02:02,267 --> 01:02:04,767
- Hey, Todd. Did you get the proposal?
- Not bad.
839
01:02:05,167 --> 01:02:06,667
My Laird didn't like it very much.
840
01:02:06,867 --> 01:02:09,667
- Who cares what Laird thinks.
- I do. He's young, Bob.
841
01:02:09,867 --> 01:02:11,667
We'll talk about it tonight
on the plane.
842
01:02:11,767 --> 01:02:13,167
- No.
- No?
843
01:02:13,267 --> 01:02:17,067
I flew in last night. It's a mile high here
and I want to get acclimated.
844
01:02:17,267 --> 01:02:19,567
You don't wanna have a nose bleed
in a presentation.
845
01:02:19,767 --> 01:02:21,167
Could be a little embarrassing.
846
01:02:21,367 --> 01:02:24,667
So I'll see you there. Here.
847
01:02:32,668 --> 01:02:34,468
Mom, he's suffering.
848
01:02:34,668 --> 01:02:36,368
Honey, can I help?
849
01:02:37,068 --> 01:02:39,868
No, honey.
No, don't come down here.
850
01:02:40,068 --> 01:02:42,268
Boy, I'm just gonna try
and clean up a little...
851
01:02:42,968 --> 01:02:44,968
Don't use bark.
852
01:02:45,568 --> 01:02:47,068
These are great.
853
01:02:47,568 --> 01:02:49,568
Yeah, there it is. That does the trick.
854
01:02:50,368 --> 01:02:52,668
Ferns. Nature's broom.
855
01:02:52,868 --> 01:02:55,868
Honey, no. You can't go on like this.
It's 10 miles.
856
01:02:56,068 --> 01:02:57,768
No,
I don't wanna spoil it for you guys.
857
01:02:57,968 --> 01:03:01,068
- You won't. We'll go tomorrow.
- No.
858
01:03:01,268 --> 01:03:02,668
Tomorrow we go to the lake.
859
01:03:03,168 --> 01:03:05,368
Listen, I'll stay here. You go on.
860
01:03:05,568 --> 01:03:08,668
- I don't know...
- Go. It's a beautiful hike.
861
01:03:09,968 --> 01:03:11,168
Guys?
862
01:03:11,868 --> 01:03:13,168
Come on, kids.
863
01:03:13,568 --> 01:03:16,368
Yeah? Okay.
864
01:03:16,468 --> 01:03:18,068
Good.
865
01:03:19,368 --> 01:03:21,068
I'll try and make it back to the RV.
866
01:03:21,168 --> 01:03:23,268
I'm okay. Got my ferns.
867
01:03:24,168 --> 01:03:25,868
Okay. I'm okay.
868
01:03:26,368 --> 01:03:30,269
Go on. Go on, you guys.
Save yourself. Okay.
869
01:03:53,769 --> 01:03:56,169
Welcome to the RoadMate 700.
870
01:03:56,269 --> 01:03:59,769
Hi, Lola. My wife's not here.
871
01:04:30,470 --> 01:04:32,870
- The hell are you driving?
- Cadillac of RVs, Todd.
872
01:04:33,070 --> 01:04:35,570
You know, we should go over... Laird.
873
01:04:36,170 --> 01:04:38,270
Yeah, I decided
to go with Laird's presentation.
874
01:04:38,470 --> 01:04:42,070
- But hang around, tell a few jokes.
- You got it.
875
01:04:49,770 --> 01:04:50,970
Hi there.
876
01:04:51,470 --> 01:04:53,070
- Larry Moiphine.
- Garry Moiphine.
877
01:04:53,670 --> 01:04:56,170
- Cute dog.
- Oh, yeah. She's a sweetie.
878
01:04:56,470 --> 01:04:58,970
Oh, yeah, who's a good girl?
879
01:04:59,170 --> 01:05:00,370
- Todd?
- No.
880
01:05:00,570 --> 01:05:01,970
- Bob.
- Hi, Bob.
881
01:05:02,170 --> 01:05:03,370
- Laird.
- Hi, Laird.
882
01:05:03,570 --> 01:05:04,770
Larry. Laird.
883
01:05:04,970 --> 01:05:08,070
So, fellas, we'll have a little nosh
and we'll hear your presentation.
884
01:05:08,270 --> 01:05:10,770
- Tammy's not here yet. Our assistant.
- So we'll eat slow.
885
01:05:10,970 --> 01:05:12,570
- Come on.
- Gentlemen.
886
01:05:23,871 --> 01:05:26,471
Oh, hi. Hi. Sorry I'm late.
887
01:05:26,671 --> 01:05:29,471
You guys have all just got to see
the circus before it leaves.
888
01:05:29,971 --> 01:05:31,471
- It's good, huh?
- It was amazing.
889
01:05:31,571 --> 01:05:32,971
Wow, so...
890
01:05:33,171 --> 01:05:37,871
Oh, of course. I believe you folks
have a presentation for us.
891
01:05:38,071 --> 01:05:43,171
- Yes. Laird.
- Good luck.
892
01:05:48,871 --> 01:05:53,971
In 1985, Pure Vibe soda completed
a friendly takeover...
893
01:05:54,171 --> 01:05:56,771
...of Mr. Twinkle Iced Tea.
Today, Mr. Twinkle is worth...
894
01:05:56,971 --> 01:05:59,371
...an estimated $91 million.
895
01:05:59,671 --> 01:06:02,671
And that was with a profit definition
not as favorable...
896
01:06:02,871 --> 01:06:05,671
...as the one Pure Vibe is offering...
897
01:06:06,371 --> 01:06:09,271
...Alpine Soda.
If you turn to chart number one...
898
01:06:09,571 --> 01:06:11,371
Sorry, is this just gonna be
about money?
899
01:06:11,571 --> 01:06:12,971
No, it's... Stocks.
900
01:06:13,171 --> 01:06:15,672
Other than money,
why should we change from a local...
901
01:06:15,772 --> 01:06:19,172
...family-oriented business to become
subsidiary to a national brand?
902
01:06:20,272 --> 01:06:22,772
Yeah. Other than money?
903
01:06:23,072 --> 01:06:25,072
- Right.
- Yeah.
904
01:06:25,172 --> 01:06:27,272
Garry, Larry.
905
01:06:28,172 --> 01:06:31,472
Fifty years ago, if you walked down
any street in America...
906
01:06:31,572 --> 01:06:35,172
...on a warm Monday night...
Thanks, Laird.
907
01:06:35,372 --> 01:06:39,072
- You'd hear I Love Lucy coming out
of every house, on every block.
908
01:06:39,272 --> 01:06:42,472
I'm not speaking about conformity,
I'm talking about "Isn't it great?"
909
01:06:42,672 --> 01:06:43,872
And every once in a while...
910
01:06:44,072 --> 01:06:46,372
...America falls in love with something
together.
911
01:06:46,572 --> 01:06:48,972
That could happen here.
You have a terrific product.
912
01:06:49,172 --> 01:06:51,472
Money aside, how'd
Walter Frederick Morrison feel...
913
01:06:51,672 --> 01:06:54,172
...every time he walked by a park
and he'd see people...
914
01:06:54,272 --> 01:06:56,672
...throwing a Frisbee and the dog
doing all the work?
915
01:06:56,772 --> 01:06:59,872
If Pure Vibe takes Alpine national,
I think we have a chance...
916
01:07:00,072 --> 01:07:03,472
...to let America fall in love
with something again.
917
01:07:05,272 --> 01:07:08,072
What's your hurry? Why don't
you stay and bask in my gratitude?
918
01:07:08,272 --> 01:07:10,073
I gotta get the RV back right now,
Todd...
919
01:07:10,273 --> 01:07:12,173
...or I have to pay for a full day.
920
01:07:12,673 --> 01:07:16,273
- Well, just picture me hugging you.
- Thanks.
921
01:07:27,373 --> 01:07:30,173
Officer? Excuse me.
What's going on?
922
01:07:30,373 --> 01:07:32,273
Landslide.
We're diverting through l-70.
923
01:07:32,473 --> 01:07:35,673
L-70? Lt'll take hours. Isn't there
another way around Mount Watson?
924
01:07:35,873 --> 01:07:38,273
Diablo Pass. But you're not
gonna make it in that rig.
925
01:08:28,574 --> 01:08:30,774
Dad was right.
This is really amazing.
926
01:08:30,974 --> 01:08:33,674
Yeah. Poor Dad.
927
01:08:33,874 --> 01:08:35,774
Should we cut this short
and go back?
928
01:08:35,874 --> 01:08:38,174
- Yeah.
- Okay.
929
01:08:41,174 --> 01:08:42,874
You are not on any marked road.
930
01:08:43,074 --> 01:08:44,274
I know that, Lola.
931
01:08:44,474 --> 01:08:47,174
Make a U-turn
at the next legal opportunity.
932
01:08:47,274 --> 01:08:48,674
I can't.
933
01:09:01,375 --> 01:09:03,175
Squeeze them cheeks
Tighten them buns
934
01:09:03,375 --> 01:09:04,975
Come on now
We having fun
935
01:09:05,175 --> 01:09:09,175
Big old rolling turd coming through
Coming through
936
01:09:16,775 --> 01:09:19,375
- You are not on any marked road.
- Shut up!
937
01:09:34,775 --> 01:09:37,275
Come on, Turd. Keep rolling.
Come on. Come on.
938
01:09:38,075 --> 01:09:39,375
You can do it.
939
01:09:40,975 --> 01:09:42,275
Come on.
940
01:09:45,275 --> 01:09:50,275
Come on. Come on. Come on.
941
01:10:11,176 --> 01:10:12,376
Damn it.
942
01:11:57,178 --> 01:11:59,878
Make a U-turn
at the next legal opportunity.
943
01:12:02,178 --> 01:12:04,178
Dad's gonna be surprised
we got back so soon.
944
01:12:04,278 --> 01:12:05,678
Yeah.
945
01:12:20,278 --> 01:12:22,278
Who was that maniac?
946
01:12:46,979 --> 01:12:48,079
Oh, God.
947
01:12:49,279 --> 01:12:50,979
Bob?
948
01:12:51,679 --> 01:12:55,679
- Jamie.
- Why are you laying on the ground?
949
01:12:55,979 --> 01:12:59,279
Honey,
there's something I need to tell you.
950
01:12:59,879 --> 01:13:02,579
I need...
951
01:13:02,779 --> 01:13:06,479
Needed a...
952
01:13:07,479 --> 01:13:10,379
Needed a little fresh air.
953
01:13:10,979 --> 01:13:12,579
After my incident.
954
01:13:12,779 --> 01:13:14,179
And how are you now?
955
01:13:14,779 --> 01:13:16,379
Good.
956
01:13:17,879 --> 01:13:19,779
Really good. Good.
957
01:13:19,979 --> 01:13:21,779
Oh, yeah.
958
01:13:25,679 --> 01:13:28,479
- Hello?
- Bob? Bob-orino? Bobcat?
959
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:31,679
- Yeah?
- Teeny tiny wrinkle-dinkle.
960
01:13:31,879 --> 01:13:33,679
Larry wants you
to come back tomorrow...
961
01:13:33,779 --> 01:13:36,079
...and pitch the whole company,
all the employees.
962
01:13:36,279 --> 01:13:38,079
Majority want the merger,
it's a done deal.
963
01:13:38,279 --> 01:13:39,480
- What?
- We don't need him.
964
01:13:39,680 --> 01:13:43,180
I can do this. Give me another chance.
Let me kick this through the uprights!
965
01:13:43,380 --> 01:13:48,680
- I'll do it. I'm there.
- Great. You're spitting on me.
966
01:13:52,780 --> 01:13:56,080
Big old rolling turd coming through
Coming through
967
01:13:56,280 --> 01:14:00,180
Oh, we're on that road
On a big, steaming load
968
01:14:00,380 --> 01:14:03,880
Big old rolling turd coming through
Coming through
969
01:14:04,080 --> 01:14:11,080
Big old rolling turd
Big old rolling turd coming through
970
01:14:14,180 --> 01:14:17,280
Hey, Dad. Maybe we can go
to Yellowstone on the way home.
971
01:14:17,480 --> 01:14:20,980
- I'd love to go to Yellowstone.
- Yeah, Dad. Can we?
972
01:14:21,180 --> 01:14:22,680
Absolutely.
973
01:14:22,880 --> 01:14:25,580
Come on. I wanna show you
something wonderful.
974
01:14:31,380 --> 01:14:33,680
It's hard to forget this place.
975
01:14:33,880 --> 01:14:35,581
My dad was so moved by it
he said:
976
01:14:35,781 --> 01:14:38,781
"You know, a snack stand up here
would do tremendous."
977
01:14:39,181 --> 01:14:43,081
My mom, always supportive:
"And who's gonna run it, Allan, you?"
978
01:14:43,281 --> 01:14:47,581
My dad: "Why don't you blow it out
your big, saggy rear end, Ellen."
979
01:14:47,781 --> 01:14:49,581
Can't buy memories like that.
980
01:14:49,681 --> 01:14:51,781
Or like this.
981
01:14:52,481 --> 01:14:56,081
Hey. You know, I should take the RV
to get the emergency brake fixed...
982
01:14:56,181 --> 01:14:58,481
...before we head to L.A.
- Yeah. Good idea.
983
01:14:58,581 --> 01:15:01,181
And you guys don't want
to hang around some dingy garage.
984
01:15:01,381 --> 01:15:03,381
You wait here by the lake,
enjoy the view.
985
01:15:03,581 --> 01:15:06,581
I'll drive to Boulder, be back
in an hour. We'll have a big picnic.
986
01:15:06,781 --> 01:15:09,381
- How about that?
- Okay. Sounds good.
987
01:15:09,581 --> 01:15:13,481
Guys? Tell your dad
what you wanted to tell him.
988
01:15:14,081 --> 01:15:17,081
- Thank you for taking us on this trip.
- Kinko that.
989
01:15:17,281 --> 01:15:21,281
- Better than Hawaii?
- Yeah, better than Hawaii.
990
01:15:22,281 --> 01:15:23,981
Come give big daddy a hug.
Come on.
991
01:15:24,181 --> 01:15:26,781
- Wait.
- Carl, you'll be too big soon.
992
01:15:26,981 --> 01:15:28,381
- Dad.
- Cassie'll be in college.
993
01:15:28,581 --> 01:15:29,581
- Dad!
- What?
994
01:15:29,681 --> 01:15:31,582
The RV's rolling away.
995
01:15:34,782 --> 01:15:36,282
No!
996
01:15:36,482 --> 01:15:37,582
Oh, God, no.
997
01:15:37,782 --> 01:15:38,982
- Oh, no!
- Dad, let it go!
998
01:15:40,682 --> 01:15:43,782
Bob. Bob!
999
01:15:44,982 --> 01:15:47,482
- Bob!
- Mom, what are you doing?
1000
01:15:49,282 --> 01:15:51,682
Bob, no!
1001
01:15:56,182 --> 01:15:57,782
Go.
1002
01:15:57,982 --> 01:16:00,282
Are you crazy? It's a rental.
1003
01:16:03,282 --> 01:16:05,482
- How am I gonna get to the meeting?
- What meeting?
1004
01:16:05,682 --> 01:16:07,482
The Alpine merger.
1005
01:16:09,382 --> 01:16:11,782
Sweetheart, you'll never guess
what happened yesterday.
1006
01:16:11,982 --> 01:16:14,382
- You weren't really sick.
- Not really.
1007
01:16:14,582 --> 01:16:16,182
This is about work.
1008
01:16:16,382 --> 01:16:18,982
You brought us out here because
it was close to a meeting?
1009
01:16:19,182 --> 01:16:21,682
- You're getting warmer.
- The Alpine soda merger.
1010
01:16:21,882 --> 01:16:24,582
- Bingo.
- So you lied to me...
1011
01:16:24,782 --> 01:16:27,883
...from the very beginning.
- Since we were first married?
1012
01:16:27,983 --> 01:16:31,583
No, since when you
first brought home the RV.
1013
01:16:31,683 --> 01:16:33,783
- That time, yeah.
- This has nothing to do...
1014
01:16:33,983 --> 01:16:35,783
...with you wanting to be
with your family.
1015
01:16:35,983 --> 01:16:38,383
- So you just used us?
- You wouldn't understand, missy.
1016
01:16:38,583 --> 01:16:40,283
Oh, I don't know, she's pretty smart.
1017
01:16:40,383 --> 01:16:42,583
Why don't you explain it to her.
And Carl too.
1018
01:16:42,983 --> 01:16:44,183
Kids...
1019
01:16:44,383 --> 01:16:45,583
...life is hard.
1020
01:16:45,783 --> 01:16:48,083
Not "The TiVo in my room
is not working" hard.
1021
01:16:48,283 --> 01:16:51,583
But "making a living because you're
responsible for people you love" hard.
1022
01:16:51,683 --> 01:16:54,483
You know what it's like to be 50,
people are digging a hole...
1023
01:16:54,683 --> 01:16:55,983
...to bury your career...
- Bob.
1024
01:16:56,183 --> 01:16:57,583
All right, that's a little rough.
1025
01:16:57,783 --> 01:16:59,683
Cassie,
where do you want to go to college?
1026
01:16:59,783 --> 01:17:01,683
Stanford.
1027
01:17:01,783 --> 01:17:03,583
Carl, where's that camp you're going?
1028
01:17:03,683 --> 01:17:05,783
- Alaska.
- Alaska.
1029
01:17:05,983 --> 01:17:09,083
And you, how much do you think
that little fixer-upper of ours cost?
1030
01:17:09,283 --> 01:17:11,483
Who has to ride a $4000 bicycle?
1031
01:17:11,683 --> 01:17:14,783
I have to ride a custom bike
because my hips aren't aligned.
1032
01:17:15,383 --> 01:17:18,083
Are you happy? Now the kids know
that their old man's a freak.
1033
01:17:18,283 --> 01:17:21,884
Listen, I have to get to that meeting,
or I lose my job and we lose a lifestyle.
1034
01:17:22,084 --> 01:17:24,084
Let's pull it up two-by-two,
look for help.
1035
01:17:24,284 --> 01:17:26,184
- Carl. Come with me.
- I'm good.
1036
01:17:28,284 --> 01:17:29,584
Cassie?
1037
01:18:27,185 --> 01:18:30,585
I'm gonna lose my job. I hope the kids
like selling fruit on the freeway.
1038
01:18:35,585 --> 01:18:37,985
You know what's scary
is that this is rush hour.
1039
01:18:38,085 --> 01:18:42,085
Mom, there's never going to be
any other cars on this road.
1040
01:18:47,285 --> 01:18:49,985
Oh, my God.
1041
01:18:53,785 --> 01:18:55,685
- Where's your husband?
- Don't ask.
1042
01:18:55,885 --> 01:18:58,185
Could you possibly
take us to an airport?
1043
01:18:59,085 --> 01:19:00,485
What's all this?
1044
01:19:00,685 --> 01:19:03,085
Oh, I gotta study
for my stupid placement test.
1045
01:19:03,485 --> 01:19:05,985
Oh, like some sort of
vocational training?
1046
01:19:07,485 --> 01:19:08,785
College.
1047
01:19:09,785 --> 01:19:13,086
- How old are you?
- Fifteen and a half. I jumped a grade.
1048
01:19:13,586 --> 01:19:15,686
Moon, though,
she skipped two grades.
1049
01:19:16,286 --> 01:19:18,186
So...
1050
01:19:18,586 --> 01:19:20,686
...you guys are smart.
1051
01:19:22,086 --> 01:19:23,686
Gonna be unemployed.
1052
01:19:23,786 --> 01:19:26,686
I'm gonna have to sell my liver
for cash.
1053
01:19:27,186 --> 01:19:30,086
And then he just
rode out of the lake.
1054
01:19:30,186 --> 01:19:33,586
Yup. This one really snuck up
and bit me right on the seat-meat.
1055
01:19:33,786 --> 01:19:35,586
I thought Bob was good people.
1056
01:19:35,786 --> 01:19:38,186
- Does anybody have a vomit bag?
- Are you sick?
1057
01:19:38,386 --> 01:19:41,186
Big time.
Cassie and Earl are making out.
1058
01:19:41,286 --> 01:19:42,386
What?
1059
01:19:42,586 --> 01:19:44,286
Don't worry.
I got them in the mirror.
1060
01:19:44,386 --> 01:19:46,186
Boy don't know
what the hell he's doing.
1061
01:19:46,386 --> 01:19:49,186
- Like father, like son.
- Hey.
1062
01:19:49,486 --> 01:19:51,186
Listen, I have to admit something.
1063
01:19:51,386 --> 01:19:54,686
Bob wasn't the only one
trying to avoid you. I was too.
1064
01:19:54,886 --> 01:19:57,886
I don't mean to shock you, but we
ain't everybody's cup of sunshine.
1065
01:19:58,086 --> 01:20:00,086
Well, it was you,
but it was mostly us.
1066
01:20:00,286 --> 01:20:02,586
You didn't exactly catch
the Munros at their best.
1067
01:20:02,686 --> 01:20:05,086
Yeah, see, I had a feeling
you was having troubles.
1068
01:20:05,286 --> 01:20:07,186
Yeah, here's the thing.
1069
01:20:07,386 --> 01:20:09,787
You start off happy and stupid.
1070
01:20:09,887 --> 01:20:12,287
Then you become associates
in the marriage business:
1071
01:20:12,787 --> 01:20:14,787
"Did the plumber come?"
"Take Carl to soccer."
1072
01:20:14,987 --> 01:20:17,087
"I'll pick up your dad
from the doctor's office."
1073
01:20:17,287 --> 01:20:20,387
Until you don't remember what
brought you together in the first place.
1074
01:20:20,587 --> 01:20:22,687
You know what I mean?
1075
01:20:22,787 --> 01:20:24,587
No, I don't. L... No.
1076
01:20:24,787 --> 01:20:25,987
No.
1077
01:20:27,287 --> 01:20:28,587
Okay.
1078
01:20:28,787 --> 01:20:33,687
Anyway, in the last few days,
I caught a glimpse of the old us.
1079
01:20:33,887 --> 01:20:36,187
And I was happy.
1080
01:20:37,787 --> 01:20:38,987
I better get directions...
1081
01:20:39,187 --> 01:20:41,887
...so I can take you folks
where you need to be.
1082
01:21:04,488 --> 01:21:06,188
Oh, really?
1083
01:21:09,588 --> 01:21:11,288
Jamie!
1084
01:21:11,988 --> 01:21:15,088
Cassie! Carl!
1085
01:21:15,288 --> 01:21:17,388
Come on, let's hit the road, Jamie.
1086
01:21:19,488 --> 01:21:20,688
Okay.
1087
01:21:23,488 --> 01:21:24,988
Oh, God.
1088
01:21:31,488 --> 01:21:34,488
- Ladies first.
- Oh, boy, that's working it.
1089
01:21:58,888 --> 01:22:00,689
Stop!
1090
01:22:01,689 --> 01:22:03,989
Oh, Munro!
1091
01:22:04,189 --> 01:22:05,389
The hike was so intense...
1092
01:22:05,589 --> 01:22:08,389
...there was a few parts where
I had to carry my mom and sister.
1093
01:22:08,589 --> 01:22:10,689
I think I might have pulled a muscle.
1094
01:22:10,889 --> 01:22:12,889
- Where?
- In the woods.
1095
01:22:16,689 --> 01:22:18,289
Travis!
1096
01:23:11,590 --> 01:23:13,090
Jamie.
1097
01:23:15,290 --> 01:23:16,690
Bob?
1098
01:23:20,990 --> 01:23:23,990
Are you an idiot? Do you want
your children to see their father...
1099
01:23:24,090 --> 01:23:25,390
...bouncing down the highway?
1100
01:23:25,590 --> 01:23:27,290
Why are you with
the Partridge Family?
1101
01:23:27,490 --> 01:23:30,090
- What are you doing on the bus?
- Because I was chasing you.
1102
01:23:30,290 --> 01:23:33,590
You win. I blew off my job because
I can't live without you. You happy?
1103
01:23:33,790 --> 01:23:37,190
I never asked you to blow off your job.
I wanted you to be honest with me.
1104
01:23:37,390 --> 01:23:40,190
Honest. Like, "Todd's gonna fire me
if I go to Boulder" honest?
1105
01:23:40,390 --> 01:23:43,490
- "Screw Hawaii" honest?
- Oh, I see.
1106
01:23:43,690 --> 01:23:46,290
You think that if you told me
you were in trouble...
1107
01:23:46,390 --> 01:23:49,590
...and your job was in jeopardy,
that I'd give you a hard time about it?
1108
01:23:49,790 --> 01:23:51,091
No crying, that's cheating.
1109
01:23:51,191 --> 01:23:54,191
Do you think I'm some horrible witch
that doesn't care? I do care!
1110
01:23:54,291 --> 01:23:55,991
I care a lot.
1111
01:23:56,191 --> 01:23:59,191
In fact, I hate you. Jerk.
1112
01:24:00,391 --> 01:24:03,191
I didn't want you to know
I was in trouble.
1113
01:24:03,991 --> 01:24:07,391
You and Cassie and Carl,
you mean everything to me.
1114
01:24:07,591 --> 01:24:11,191
What you think about me is the
most important thing in the world.
1115
01:24:12,091 --> 01:24:14,191
I didn't want to fail.
1116
01:24:15,991 --> 01:24:19,491
If you don't know how I feel about you
after 19 years of marriage...
1117
01:24:19,691 --> 01:24:22,091
...then I must be a failure as a wife.
1118
01:24:23,091 --> 01:24:25,291
Then you admit you're the problem.
1119
01:24:27,891 --> 01:24:29,591
Bob.
1120
01:24:36,091 --> 01:24:39,391
You mean more to me
than just a paycheck.
1121
01:24:39,991 --> 01:24:42,591
That's good, because we won't be
getting one for a while.
1122
01:24:42,691 --> 01:24:44,191
I missed that meeting.
1123
01:24:44,391 --> 01:24:45,891
No, you didn't.
1124
01:24:48,392 --> 01:24:49,592
Come on, Bob. Come here.
1125
01:25:03,292 --> 01:25:05,492
It's a Christmas miracle.
1126
01:25:05,692 --> 01:25:08,492
No, it just sounded like this was
where your wife needed to be.
1127
01:25:08,692 --> 01:25:10,492
So I brought her.
1128
01:25:10,692 --> 01:25:14,192
Travis has never been one
to mind his own business.
1129
01:25:14,692 --> 01:25:15,992
Travis...
1130
01:25:16,192 --> 01:25:20,992
...some of my behavior on this trip
might be misconstrued as an insult.
1131
01:25:21,192 --> 01:25:23,592
Did come off a tad abrasive.
1132
01:25:23,692 --> 01:25:26,292
I was wrong, and it takes
a small man to admit it.
1133
01:25:26,492 --> 01:25:27,692
And you're a big man.
1134
01:25:27,892 --> 01:25:30,892
- I don't just mean...
- I understand a metaphor, Bob.
1135
01:25:31,092 --> 01:25:32,892
See, I went to Stanford.
1136
01:25:34,992 --> 01:25:37,192
You big lug, I love you!
1137
01:25:38,292 --> 01:25:39,792
Who loves his big lug?
1138
01:25:39,992 --> 01:25:41,993
- I love you, you big...
- I know, l...
1139
01:25:42,193 --> 01:25:45,093
- Todd.
- Little dramatic, don't you think, Bob?
1140
01:25:45,293 --> 01:25:46,993
Showing up at
the last possible minute.
1141
01:25:47,893 --> 01:25:49,693
You look horrible. Let's go.
1142
01:25:55,993 --> 01:25:57,393
Dad.
1143
01:25:57,793 --> 01:25:58,993
- I'm sorry.
- Sorry?
1144
01:25:59,193 --> 01:26:03,093
I guess you're under a lot of pressure
and I could have been less trouble.
1145
01:26:03,193 --> 01:26:05,393
And in your own nerdy way
you're kind of cool.
1146
01:26:07,293 --> 01:26:09,093
- Bob?
- Yeah?
1147
01:26:09,293 --> 01:26:10,793
I'm hating this.
1148
01:26:13,793 --> 01:26:15,293
- Dad.
- Yeah?
1149
01:26:15,393 --> 01:26:16,793
- I get it.
- What?
1150
01:26:16,893 --> 01:26:19,993
Sometimes if you wanna succeed,
you have to do what they tell you.
1151
01:26:26,393 --> 01:26:28,093
- You...
- Bob!
1152
01:26:32,393 --> 01:26:33,993
This is the big one, Bobcat.
1153
01:26:34,193 --> 01:26:35,493
- Bases loaded.
- Got it.
1154
01:26:35,693 --> 01:26:38,594
You hit a grand slam on this,
it's big raise, promotion, bonus...
1155
01:26:38,794 --> 01:26:41,194
...and I personally push Laird
down a flight of stairs.
1156
01:26:41,394 --> 01:26:44,794
Everybody, this is Bob.
Remember, charming and funny.
1157
01:26:45,094 --> 01:26:47,494
Hi, everybody. Sorry I'm late...
1158
01:26:47,694 --> 01:26:51,294
...I just came down that mountain,
and next time I'll use a road.
1159
01:26:51,994 --> 01:26:55,294
I guess you guys didn't get the memo
about extreme casual.
1160
01:26:56,194 --> 01:26:58,994
I love your wilderness so much,
I decided to wear it.
1161
01:27:00,994 --> 01:27:02,294
Easy, Todd.
1162
01:27:02,994 --> 01:27:05,094
It's been kind of a wild journey
getting here.
1163
01:27:05,294 --> 01:27:07,494
If you ever wanna really find out
about yourself...
1164
01:27:07,694 --> 01:27:09,894
...put your family in an RV and drive.
1165
01:27:10,094 --> 01:27:11,594
I've seen some amazing stuff.
1166
01:27:11,694 --> 01:27:15,494
I've fought wild raccoons and won.
I've been in the desert to a place...
1167
01:27:15,694 --> 01:27:18,994
...where it's not the end of the world,
but you can see it from there.
1168
01:27:19,094 --> 01:27:21,294
And I met this weird family.
1169
01:27:21,494 --> 01:27:24,194
I mean, boy, they were strange.
1170
01:27:24,394 --> 01:27:27,594
You know, whenever a big white man
picks up a banjo, my cheeks tighten.
1171
01:27:28,194 --> 01:27:31,094
In the dictionary, under "hootenanny,"
it says, "See: Them."
1172
01:27:31,294 --> 01:27:33,695
But you know
what's strange about them.
1173
01:27:34,495 --> 01:27:38,495
They're just honest, good people, and
it's an honor to have them as friends.
1174
01:27:41,795 --> 01:27:43,195
Garry, Larry...
1175
01:27:43,295 --> 01:27:46,095
...this is a nice company
you have here. It's your baby.
1176
01:27:46,195 --> 01:27:49,095
I bet at the birth of your baby
you were kind of scared, right?
1177
01:27:49,195 --> 01:27:51,995
Excited, but scared. You didn't
know how it was gonna turn out.
1178
01:27:52,195 --> 01:27:54,595
And next thing you know,
it's up and walking...
1179
01:27:54,795 --> 01:27:57,895
...and you're trying to raise it. You
didn't know what you were doing...
1180
01:27:58,095 --> 01:27:59,995
...but you pretended like you did.
1181
01:28:00,195 --> 01:28:02,895
And next thing you know,
your baby's grown.
1182
01:28:03,095 --> 01:28:06,495
It's bigger, older. More complicated.
1183
01:28:06,695 --> 01:28:07,995
Difficult to deal with.
1184
01:28:09,095 --> 01:28:11,095
But here's the deal...
1185
01:28:11,295 --> 01:28:15,095
...you care about it just as much,
because you nurtured it...
1186
01:28:15,195 --> 01:28:18,595
...and part of you is in it,
and you're proud of it.
1187
01:28:19,295 --> 01:28:20,895
You love it more than ever.
1188
01:28:25,995 --> 01:28:28,296
And right now,
you have to make a decision...
1189
01:28:28,496 --> 01:28:31,596
...of whether you wanna merge
your family with the Pure Vibe family.
1190
01:28:31,796 --> 01:28:34,296
Your stocks are gonna split.
You're gonna have money...
1191
01:28:34,496 --> 01:28:37,396
...you won't know what to do with.
And your company's gonna grow.
1192
01:28:37,596 --> 01:28:40,496
You'll be bigger than a woman
in bicycle shorts at Disneyland.
1193
01:28:40,696 --> 01:28:44,196
You'll be able to get all that stuff,
like the ski boat, a $4000 bike...
1194
01:28:44,396 --> 01:28:45,896
...maybe even a Barcalounger...
1195
01:28:46,096 --> 01:28:48,696
...that massages your ass
and blows smoke at the same time.
1196
01:28:48,896 --> 01:28:50,496
Bottom line here, Garry, Larry.
1197
01:28:50,596 --> 01:28:53,396
If you wanna merge
Alpine and Pure Vibe...
1198
01:28:54,296 --> 01:28:57,596
...I promise you, you're making
the worst decision of your entire life.
1199
01:28:59,296 --> 01:29:02,296
This guy is a disgruntled employee.
1200
01:29:02,496 --> 01:29:05,596
Couldn't keep up with younger talent.
Look at him. He's off his meds.
1201
01:29:05,796 --> 01:29:08,296
Finished. His own daughter
assaulted me in my home.
1202
01:29:08,396 --> 01:29:11,296
I did not. It was my friend,
and she did it because Pure Vibe...
1203
01:29:11,496 --> 01:29:14,196
...has one of the worst
environmental records in the industry.
1204
01:29:14,996 --> 01:29:16,296
Why are these kids here?
1205
01:29:16,496 --> 01:29:19,996
Plus, last year you guys outsourced
for cheaper labor to other countries...
1206
01:29:20,896 --> 01:29:22,396
Let her go, Todd.
1207
01:29:22,596 --> 01:29:24,597
I'll let her go. I'll let you go.
1208
01:29:24,697 --> 01:29:26,297
You're fired.
1209
01:29:31,297 --> 01:29:33,097
Yo, dog.
1210
01:29:33,497 --> 01:29:36,897
- Carl.
- My hero.
1211
01:29:39,797 --> 01:29:42,397
Todd, I quit.
1212
01:30:06,797 --> 01:30:08,697
Honey,
there seems to be snow on the ground.
1213
01:30:08,897 --> 01:30:11,497
Babe, it's left over from last winter.
At 9500 feet...
1214
01:30:11,697 --> 01:30:13,197
...it doesn't melt. It's glacial.
1215
01:30:14,597 --> 01:30:16,397
- We don't have chains.
- Don't need them.
1216
01:30:16,497 --> 01:30:18,197
They're for the winter, not July.
1217
01:30:18,297 --> 01:30:20,198
Well, I see snow.
1218
01:30:20,398 --> 01:30:21,698
Hey, Dad, are we poor?
1219
01:30:21,898 --> 01:30:24,698
Carl, there's a lot of ways
to measure a family's wealth.
1220
01:30:24,898 --> 01:30:26,898
- I think love...
- I was talking about money.
1221
01:30:27,098 --> 01:30:28,798
- We're dirt poor.
- Sell the house.
1222
01:30:28,998 --> 01:30:30,898
We could all live
in the Big Rolling Turd.
1223
01:30:31,098 --> 01:30:33,898
We'll spend every minute together,
just like the Gornickes.
1224
01:30:34,098 --> 01:30:37,398
- That just sounds fantastic.
- Oh, yeah.
1225
01:30:41,098 --> 01:30:43,798
- Chains. Four-wheel drive.
- Thanks.
1226
01:30:44,998 --> 01:30:48,298
Officer, good day. I know what you're
gonna say: "Where are your chains?"
1227
01:30:48,398 --> 01:30:50,798
Well, sir, this is no ordinary RV.
1228
01:30:50,898 --> 01:30:54,098
It's part ATV, part SUV,
and certified by the DMV.
1229
01:30:54,298 --> 01:30:57,698
It's got positraction, Dynaflow,
control traction with me in control.
1230
01:30:57,898 --> 01:31:00,398
It's got heated rims.
Wish I had those.
1231
01:31:03,598 --> 01:31:04,998
Okay.
1232
01:31:05,198 --> 01:31:07,698
License and registration, sir.
1233
01:31:16,399 --> 01:31:18,199
Oh, there it is.
1234
01:31:20,999 --> 01:31:23,499
I believe that was
the rental agreement.
1235
01:31:23,899 --> 01:31:26,099
We had a little bit
of a mishap at the lake.
1236
01:31:26,299 --> 01:31:29,399
I lost my wallet.
My name is Bob Munro.
1237
01:31:30,599 --> 01:31:32,499
We got him.
We're just ahead of you.
1238
01:31:33,099 --> 01:31:34,399
Got me?
1239
01:31:35,299 --> 01:31:38,399
Officer, I know she may look unsafe,
but she's tough.
1240
01:31:38,499 --> 01:31:40,399
She likes to be rode hard
and put away wet.
1241
01:31:40,599 --> 01:31:42,699
Spent two days in the lake.
Had to fish her out.
1242
01:31:42,899 --> 01:31:44,599
It means a lot.
We couldn't abandon it.
1243
01:31:44,699 --> 01:31:46,299
It's like a big, ugly pet, really.
1244
01:31:47,599 --> 01:31:49,599
You got him. Thanks, Sam.
1245
01:31:49,799 --> 01:31:52,099
- We owe you one.
- We've been chasing you all morning.
1246
01:31:52,299 --> 01:31:53,599
I just took one soda.
1247
01:31:53,799 --> 01:31:56,199
No, we just want you to know
we're going national.
1248
01:31:57,199 --> 01:31:59,199
- Well, good luck.
- With you.
1249
01:31:59,299 --> 01:32:01,599
We want you to join us
at Alpine Beverages.
1250
01:32:02,399 --> 01:32:04,799
- You're offering me a job?
- Yeah.
1251
01:32:04,999 --> 01:32:08,099
- Yes, he'll take it.
- She's a tough negotiator.
1252
01:32:08,299 --> 01:32:11,300
You just really seem to get us,
like a harmonic convergence.
1253
01:32:11,400 --> 01:32:13,100
- Dad, you forgot something.
- Baby...
1254
01:32:13,300 --> 01:32:17,000
...don't interrupt daddy's new bosses.
- Sure, but the RV's rolling away.
1255
01:32:28,000 --> 01:32:38,000
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