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1
00:00:12,333 --> 00:00:14,166
Hey, man, I don't know
who you think you are,
2
00:00:14,166 --> 00:00:15,500
but you're not supposed
to be at this table.
3
00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:17,041
I don't know who you think
you are,
4
00:00:17,250 --> 00:00:19,208
but men aren't supposed
to grow tits, and yet,
5
00:00:19,542 --> 00:00:21,542
there they are,
atop your little paunch.
6
00:00:23,917 --> 00:00:25,709
Get outta there,
I wanna sit next to this guy!
7
00:00:25,709 --> 00:00:26,792
(CHUCKLING)
8
00:00:28,041 --> 00:00:29,208
MONICA:
So, Erlich, good news,
9
00:00:29,208 --> 00:00:31,583
Keenan Feldspar
signed his term sheet.
10
00:00:31,583 --> 00:00:32,750
Fantastic!
11
00:00:32,959 --> 00:00:35,125
Hello, everyone.
I'm very excited to introduce...
12
00:00:36,667 --> 00:00:37,709
The Box.
13
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,875
Last night was...
14
00:00:42,875 --> 00:00:45,709
Worst sex I think I've ever had
by far.
15
00:00:46,125 --> 00:00:47,792
If we could just close the deal?
16
00:00:47,792 --> 00:00:49,417
If it's okay with Dan,
it's fine with me.
17
00:00:49,709 --> 00:00:51,959
Richard, I need you
to look me in the eye,
18
00:00:51,959 --> 00:00:53,542
and tell me that this
is gonna work.
19
00:00:53,542 --> 00:00:55,250
'Cause if it doesn't
I'm completely fucked.
20
00:01:02,291 --> 00:01:05,208
Erlich:
A little to the right.
The right more. More.
21
00:01:05,208 --> 00:01:07,625
More. Woof! Aces.
22
00:01:07,625 --> 00:01:10,041
We did it.
Busy?
23
00:01:10,041 --> 00:01:11,417
Hey! Come on in.
24
00:01:11,417 --> 00:01:13,250
I'm just putting
the finishing touches
25
00:01:13,250 --> 00:01:15,417
on Bachman's
Operational Center.
26
00:01:15,417 --> 00:01:17,375
Can you believe
that I talked the ladies
27
00:01:17,375 --> 00:01:20,333
into letting me keep
that little piece
of genius in here?
28
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:24,166
Oh! Sweet.
Sweet indeed.
It's human hair.
29
00:01:24,166 --> 00:01:26,458
Where have you been?
We've been trying
to close your deal.
30
00:01:26,458 --> 00:01:30,000
Monica and Laurie
are really fighting me
on one final deal point,
31
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:33,500
and I was getting bummed,
so I turned my phone off,
32
00:01:33,500 --> 00:01:35,166
went kitesurfing in Fiji.
33
00:01:35,166 --> 00:01:38,166
When I got back,
I was chill again,
34
00:01:38,166 --> 00:01:40,792
and I got a message
that they agreed.
35
00:01:40,792 --> 00:01:42,166
So, you closed?
36
00:01:42,166 --> 00:01:46,500
Yep!
What was that one little,
pesky deal point?
37
00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:47,875
I think you're gonna like it.
38
00:01:49,709 --> 00:01:53,208
(shouts)
Fuck yeah!
39
00:01:53,208 --> 00:01:55,291
(theme music playing)
40
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:06,875
A keyman clause?
41
00:02:06,875 --> 00:02:11,166
Yes, and said keyman is
none other than yours truly.
42
00:02:11,166 --> 00:02:14,375
It's the highest honor
that you can bestow on a VC.
43
00:02:14,375 --> 00:02:17,083
Wow. So, you get shares
in the company.
44
00:02:17,083 --> 00:02:19,542
No.
So, you get a seat
on the board.
45
00:02:19,542 --> 00:02:20,583
I do not.
46
00:02:21,625 --> 00:02:24,625
A bonus?
There's no cash involved,
47
00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:29,542
but if Monica or Laurie tries
to oust me from Bream-Hall,
48
00:02:29,542 --> 00:02:32,834
Keenan Feldspar can void
the deal and walk.
49
00:02:32,834 --> 00:02:36,000
So, basically, this new title
just means that you,
50
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:39,166
for sure, get to keep
your shitty desk job.
51
00:02:39,166 --> 00:02:40,583
Congratulations,
but, Erlich,
52
00:02:40,583 --> 00:02:42,542
can you please
turn on the heat?
It's freezing in here.
53
00:02:42,542 --> 00:02:45,375
Tsk-tsk, Richard.
Negativity.
54
00:02:45,375 --> 00:02:47,458
Hey, have you seen
Keenan's demo?
55
00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:49,667
Reddit is
shitting itself over it.
56
00:02:49,667 --> 00:02:52,250
Of course I've seen it.
I'm his keyman.
57
00:02:52,250 --> 00:02:56,500
He gave me one
of the first opportunities
to shit myself over it.
58
00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:58,417
It's that good?
Guys, come on.
59
00:02:58,417 --> 00:03:01,125
How good can it be?
VR is just a fad.
60
00:03:01,125 --> 00:03:05,792
Oh, Richard.
I've forgotten what an envious
little crone you can be.
61
00:03:05,792 --> 00:03:09,583
Envious? Me? Of who?
Keenan Feldspar?
62
00:03:09,583 --> 00:03:13,125
Of course. Keenan was born
with a golden horseshoe
up his ass,
63
00:03:13,125 --> 00:03:16,917
while you sit here
toiling away in an icebox
you call your home office,
64
00:03:16,917 --> 00:03:19,083
cursed with the Midas touch
of shit.
65
00:03:19,083 --> 00:03:21,375
I'm not cursed,
and the icebox
66
00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:23,834
you're referring to
is your house, okay?
67
00:03:23,834 --> 00:03:25,750
(tab snaps)
68
00:03:25,750 --> 00:03:27,500
What?
69
00:03:27,500 --> 00:03:30,625
Uh, guys, I just got
a billing alert from Azure.
70
00:03:30,625 --> 00:03:33,250
Apparently,
all of our cold data
has gone hot,
71
00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:36,125
so we've already exceeded
our monthly server budget.
72
00:03:36,125 --> 00:03:38,750
Monthly? Bullshit.
It's been four days.
73
00:03:40,125 --> 00:03:41,542
What the fuck?
74
00:03:41,542 --> 00:03:44,291
We have to store
Melcher's data there until
we have enough phones.
75
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:45,583
We can't afford this.
76
00:03:45,583 --> 00:03:47,792
I'm gonna call Melcher.
77
00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:49,625
Hey, Richard.
How we doing?
78
00:03:49,625 --> 00:03:51,291
Is there something
going on with your data?
79
00:03:51,291 --> 00:03:54,542
Because it was
basically parked
until a few hours ago
80
00:03:54,542 --> 00:03:58,125
when it started flying on
and off our network like crazy.
81
00:03:58,125 --> 00:04:00,291
Well, aren't you--
aren't you watching
the weather channel?
82
00:04:00,291 --> 00:04:02,333
No, why?
Is there a hurricane
or something?
83
00:04:02,333 --> 00:04:05,125
Worse. It's cold outside.
Okay. So?
84
00:04:05,125 --> 00:04:07,917
California looses its mind
when it gets cold.
85
00:04:07,917 --> 00:04:09,667
(on phone)
Citrus trees start freezing.
86
00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:12,583
Sometimes there's
actual frost on the road,
87
00:04:12,583 --> 00:04:14,959
you know, then people start
filing claims like crazy.
88
00:04:14,959 --> 00:04:18,000
Our whole office is
going nuts right now.
89
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:20,166
(cart squeaking)
Richard:
Well, that kind
90
00:04:20,166 --> 00:04:21,959
of data traffic
is costing us a fortune.
91
00:04:21,959 --> 00:04:23,875
That's the beauty
of the deal we made, Richard.
92
00:04:23,875 --> 00:04:25,875
You agreed to store
our data for a flat rate.
93
00:04:25,875 --> 00:04:27,917
Everyone else in my division
is getting gouged
94
00:04:27,917 --> 00:04:30,166
on their storage
and bandwidth fees
right now,
95
00:04:30,166 --> 00:04:33,792
but thanks to you,
I look like a genius.
96
00:04:33,792 --> 00:04:35,625
I'll tell Liz you say hi.
Oh. Oh no.
97
00:04:35,625 --> 00:04:36,834
No, no, that's okay.
98
00:04:36,834 --> 00:04:40,250
♪ ♪
99
00:04:40,250 --> 00:04:43,667
What did he say?
He says hi.
100
00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:46,208
And that we are responsible
for the overages.
101
00:04:46,208 --> 00:04:48,709
Fuck!
Maybe you are cursed.
102
00:04:48,709 --> 00:04:50,667
I'm not. That's ridiculous.
There's no such thing.
103
00:04:50,667 --> 00:04:52,625
(snaps, fizzles)
Fucking what?
104
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:56,250
Richard, a bill of this size
is going to be problematic.
105
00:04:56,250 --> 00:04:58,041
(sighs)
Dinesh:
Problematic?
106
00:04:58,041 --> 00:05:01,500
Catastrophic.
We're not gonna be able
to pay that bill,
107
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:03,458
so our server's
gonna get cut off,
(pops, spraying)
108
00:05:03,458 --> 00:05:05,375
which means
we're gonna lose
Melcher's data,
109
00:05:05,375 --> 00:05:06,917
which means
he's gonna sue us
110
00:05:06,917 --> 00:05:08,917
and seize our assets
and our patents,
111
00:05:08,917 --> 00:05:11,000
and the entire future
of the fucking Internet
112
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,250
is gonna belong
to a fucking insurance company!
113
00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:15,875
I can't take
this shit anymore!
114
00:05:15,875 --> 00:05:17,291
Admit it!
We're fucked.
115
00:05:17,291 --> 00:05:19,417
Okay, let's just think.
Let's just think.
116
00:05:19,417 --> 00:05:23,709
Dan Melcher runs
a very conservative
insurance company,
117
00:05:23,709 --> 00:05:27,625
but even he was
willing to pay us up front
for data storage, right?
118
00:05:27,625 --> 00:05:31,333
True. Although,
that was complicated.
119
00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:36,000
What?
It-- it's just a such
a in-the-weeds deal.
120
00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,917
Point being,
we can find
another customer,
121
00:05:37,917 --> 00:05:42,083
and then use
that upfront payment
to cover Melcher's fees.
122
00:05:42,083 --> 00:05:45,667
That's like getting
a new credit card to pay off
your old credit card.
123
00:05:45,667 --> 00:05:49,625
Yeah, and as CFO,
I should tell you we've
already done that seven times.
124
00:05:49,625 --> 00:05:52,250
Look, I don't have
any moral issue
with any of that,
125
00:05:52,250 --> 00:05:53,792
but it was hard enough
to get Melcher.
126
00:05:53,792 --> 00:05:56,417
How the fuck
are we gonna get
a second Melcher?
127
00:05:57,750 --> 00:05:58,959
(sighs)
128
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,709
(lighter flicking)
Richard:
It's cold out here.
129
00:06:00,709 --> 00:06:02,625
Can almost see
my breath, huh?
130
00:06:02,625 --> 00:06:04,417
What do you want?
131
00:06:06,250 --> 00:06:07,291
Well, uh...
132
00:06:08,792 --> 00:06:11,291
it's just that the guys
are a little agitated,
133
00:06:11,291 --> 00:06:14,959
because we seem to be having
minor money troubles.
134
00:06:14,959 --> 00:06:17,417
I was thinking since you
and Bream-Hall signed
135
00:06:17,417 --> 00:06:20,291
such a big check
over to Keenan Feldspar
136
00:06:20,291 --> 00:06:21,959
and since you are
his keyman,
137
00:06:21,959 --> 00:06:25,709
maybe you could help
set up a data storage deal
like we had with Melcher?
138
00:06:25,709 --> 00:06:27,709
Merely tens
of minutes ago,
139
00:06:27,709 --> 00:06:31,625
you were rubbing VR's face
in a pile of its own make--
140
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,291
that means shit--
141
00:06:33,291 --> 00:06:36,083
and now VR is supposed
to be your lifeboat?
142
00:06:36,083 --> 00:06:41,041
Just to remind you,
Erlich, you are also
an investor in Pied Piper.
143
00:06:41,041 --> 00:06:43,458
It would be good
for everyone,
including you.
144
00:06:43,458 --> 00:06:45,250
Very well.
145
00:06:45,250 --> 00:06:47,917
Fill me in on the details
of your little proposal.
146
00:06:48,959 --> 00:06:50,291
Pitch.
147
00:06:50,291 --> 00:06:51,959
What do you mean?
148
00:06:51,959 --> 00:06:53,542
You-- you know the details.
149
00:06:53,542 --> 00:06:56,041
You were there with me
for every single pitch meeting.
150
00:06:56,041 --> 00:07:01,667
And I'm sorry
that I wasn't key
in those meetings,
151
00:07:01,667 --> 00:07:04,542
so I don't recall
all of the little
nitty-gritty details.
152
00:07:04,542 --> 00:07:05,667
(lighter flicks)
153
00:07:05,667 --> 00:07:07,500
♪ ♪
154
00:07:09,208 --> 00:07:12,834
...saving you 25 percent
on your data storage,
155
00:07:12,834 --> 00:07:16,583
which makes us pretty deserving
of the Weissman trophy.
156
00:07:16,583 --> 00:07:19,875
(laughing)
You know, the Heisman trophy
from athletics.
157
00:07:20,834 --> 00:07:23,667
Dude.
This demo is insane.
158
00:07:23,667 --> 00:07:25,834
Gentlemen, you're stepping
on Richard's laughs.
159
00:07:25,834 --> 00:07:27,959
I'm sorry,
but I walked up a hill,
160
00:07:27,959 --> 00:07:30,333
and on top of the hill,
there was a tavern.
161
00:07:30,333 --> 00:07:33,000
And I walked
into the tavern
162
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,291
and I could
just look everywhere,
and there was a barmaid.
163
00:07:35,291 --> 00:07:37,834
Guess what.
I walked right up
to the barmaid,
164
00:07:37,834 --> 00:07:41,041
and I just looked at her
for a really long time.
165
00:07:41,041 --> 00:07:43,417
This technology
could change the world.
166
00:07:43,417 --> 00:07:46,125
I'm not one to gush,
but the possibilities
167
00:07:46,125 --> 00:07:49,625
of your consequence-free reality
are darkly promising.
168
00:07:49,625 --> 00:07:52,333
So stoked you guys
liked it. I hacked it
together last summer
169
00:07:52,333 --> 00:07:54,500
and I just guessed right
on a lot of the details.
170
00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:55,750
But if you think
that was cool,
171
00:07:55,750 --> 00:07:57,709
wait till you see
our final hardware,
172
00:07:57,709 --> 00:07:59,458
which is en route from China.
173
00:07:59,458 --> 00:08:00,667
It's gorgeous.
174
00:08:00,667 --> 00:08:02,792
Well, enjoy it
while it lasts,
175
00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:05,125
just 'cause, you know,
this can be a tough business.
176
00:08:05,125 --> 00:08:08,291
Is it?
So, Richard...
177
00:08:08,291 --> 00:08:10,458
(claps hands)
...you wanna try the demo?
178
00:08:10,458 --> 00:08:13,417
Uh, no thanks.
No, I'm-- I'm not a VR guy.
179
00:08:13,417 --> 00:08:16,458
Richard doesn't like things
that are cool or fun
or taste good.
180
00:08:16,458 --> 00:08:18,250
Plus, it makes him queasy.
181
00:08:18,250 --> 00:08:20,500
He has a sensitive constitution.
182
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,000
Ah, come on.
You're gonna do it.
183
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,709
Look at him.
He's gonna do it.
184
00:08:23,709 --> 00:08:26,083
It's gonna be awesome!
Come on! You're doing it!
185
00:08:26,083 --> 00:08:28,291
Come on, come on.
After you.
Okay, sure. I guess. Fine.
186
00:08:28,291 --> 00:08:30,500
(retches)
187
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:32,917
(toilet flushes)
188
00:08:32,917 --> 00:08:34,375
(groans)
189
00:08:34,375 --> 00:08:35,333
Wow.
190
00:08:35,333 --> 00:08:37,208
You really vomited a lot...
191
00:08:37,208 --> 00:08:40,166
and, like, immediately.
Yeah. Yeah.
192
00:08:40,166 --> 00:08:43,417
Bad luck, I guess.
Yeah, so...
(clears throat)
193
00:08:43,417 --> 00:08:48,166
Look, anyway,
about that data storage deal?
194
00:08:48,166 --> 00:08:51,709
Oh. Yeah. If Erlich says
it works, that's good enough
for me. Let's do it.
195
00:08:51,709 --> 00:08:53,250
Really? Okay.
Keenan:
Yeah.
196
00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:54,500
Perfect. That's great.
197
00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:56,417
Um... well,
I guess we should
get back to the house,
198
00:08:56,417 --> 00:08:58,375
draw up some paperwork
for that.
Jared: Mm-hmm.
199
00:08:58,375 --> 00:09:01,500
We should be able
to pull everything together
by Monday.
200
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:05,500
Is it cool if we hang out,
just to, like, play around
with the VR some more?
201
00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:08,125
Okay, but I'm sure
Keenan's busy.
202
00:09:08,125 --> 00:09:09,625
Nah!
You guys should stay.
203
00:09:09,625 --> 00:09:11,792
You want a beer?
I just put in a fresh keg.
204
00:09:13,291 --> 00:09:15,875
He put in a fresh keg.
205
00:09:15,875 --> 00:09:19,458
It's so warm in here.
That would be
the subfloor heating.
206
00:09:19,458 --> 00:09:21,166
I didn't even know I had it.
207
00:09:21,166 --> 00:09:23,125
It just came with the house.
208
00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:24,667
Gilfoyle:
That's nice.
209
00:09:24,667 --> 00:09:27,709
What are you telling me?
Box Two is delayed?
210
00:09:27,709 --> 00:09:31,625
We were already
facing some design
and production challenges,
211
00:09:31,625 --> 00:09:33,333
but then this cold snap
happened.
212
00:09:33,333 --> 00:09:35,375
Apparently there was frost
on the loading dock
213
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:37,208
at our microprocessor plant
in Acton.
214
00:09:37,208 --> 00:09:39,208
So, it's cold outside.
215
00:09:39,208 --> 00:09:42,208
Why does everyone
in this state have to be
such a wimp about it?
216
00:09:42,208 --> 00:09:45,834
Well, a semitruck slid
right through the door
and hit the main breaker panel
217
00:09:45,834 --> 00:09:47,709
and melted down
the entire facility.
218
00:09:47,709 --> 00:09:50,000
The driver was incinerated,
instantly.
219
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:52,500
I see. Well, our thoughts
and prayers, obviously,
220
00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:54,500
but we'll still be ready
to roll out in time
221
00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:55,709
for Hoolicon, right?
222
00:09:58,417 --> 00:10:01,542
Guys. Hey.
I'm not Gavin Belson.
223
00:10:01,542 --> 00:10:06,000
You can be honest with me?
How many days will
this set us back?
224
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,291
We're going to miss
delivery of product...
225
00:10:08,291 --> 00:10:09,959
by two quarters.
226
00:10:09,959 --> 00:10:13,542
♪ ♪
227
00:10:14,875 --> 00:10:18,250
You realize Hoolicon
is in one week, right?
228
00:10:18,250 --> 00:10:21,458
I mean, it's my first Hoolicon
as CEO of this company.
229
00:10:21,458 --> 00:10:24,834
I... I'm supposed
to get up on stage,
230
00:10:24,834 --> 00:10:26,917
in front of an audience
of thousands,
231
00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:30,583
and deliver a keynote
presentation built entirely
232
00:10:30,583 --> 00:10:32,917
around the release of Box Two!
233
00:10:32,917 --> 00:10:36,125
I was going to descend
onto the stage,
234
00:10:36,125 --> 00:10:37,709
in a giant box.
235
00:10:37,709 --> 00:10:39,417
Boom!
236
00:10:39,417 --> 00:10:40,875
Jack-in-the-box.
237
00:10:40,875 --> 00:10:42,625
Then Mike Tyson
and Floyd Mayweather
238
00:10:42,625 --> 00:10:44,000
were gonna come out and box
239
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,583
over who was gonna get
to take home the first new box!
240
00:10:46,583 --> 00:10:49,709
These are world-class puns!
Now I got nothing!
241
00:10:54,542 --> 00:10:56,458
Hello?
(footsteps approach)
242
00:10:56,458 --> 00:10:57,917
(laughs)
Hey, guys!
243
00:10:58,917 --> 00:11:00,375
I have something to show you.
244
00:11:00,375 --> 00:11:03,208
Have you been here
all weekend?
Is that the sushi guy?
245
00:11:03,208 --> 00:11:05,750
(chuckles)
Matching pajamas.
246
00:11:05,750 --> 00:11:07,583
You guys look
like you're in a cult.
247
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:09,417
Oh, Keenan gets these
for free.
248
00:11:09,417 --> 00:11:11,792
Yeah, we're not
gonna wear the same thing
three days straight.
249
00:11:11,792 --> 00:11:13,583
You gotta come
check this out.
250
00:11:13,583 --> 00:11:14,917
This way!
251
00:11:14,917 --> 00:11:16,250
♪ ♪
252
00:11:18,917 --> 00:11:20,709
(exhales)
253
00:11:20,709 --> 00:11:24,750
Wow. I didn't feel sick
at all, not once.
254
00:11:24,750 --> 00:11:26,417
Not even going up
the hill?
255
00:11:26,417 --> 00:11:29,041
No. No-- no nausea at all.
256
00:11:29,041 --> 00:11:30,709
Yeah, I felt fine
the entire time.
257
00:11:30,709 --> 00:11:34,125
What'd you do?
Did you reduce the latency?
258
00:11:34,125 --> 00:11:35,834
I didn't. You did!
259
00:11:35,834 --> 00:11:37,417
Dinesh and Gilfoyle
helped me integrate
260
00:11:37,417 --> 00:11:39,583
your middle-out compression
algorithm into my codec.
261
00:11:39,583 --> 00:11:41,792
I'm sorry. What?
It's off the charts now, man!
262
00:11:41,792 --> 00:11:43,792
We were even able to push
the barmaid to the cloud.
263
00:11:43,792 --> 00:11:45,750
These two guys
are mad geniuses.
264
00:11:45,750 --> 00:11:47,041
Hang on.
I have something for ya.
265
00:11:47,041 --> 00:11:48,291
Mm-hmm.
266
00:11:51,625 --> 00:11:53,583
What the fuck?
267
00:11:53,583 --> 00:11:56,458
You just gave
our proprietary technology
268
00:11:56,458 --> 00:11:59,250
to this asshole
without even running it
by me first?
269
00:11:59,250 --> 00:12:01,458
Are you serious?
We were just hanging out,
270
00:12:01,458 --> 00:12:04,125
and he was like,
"We should try it,"
and he said we could delete it,
271
00:12:04,125 --> 00:12:05,834
and then he started
getting really excited.
272
00:12:05,834 --> 00:12:08,166
And then he said, you know,
"You're doing it,"
a bunch of times,
273
00:12:08,166 --> 00:12:11,417
and then we did it.
And then we started
getting really excited,
274
00:12:11,417 --> 00:12:13,875
and it was so exciting.
And it worked.
275
00:12:13,875 --> 00:12:15,709
The VR is rad now.
276
00:12:15,709 --> 00:12:17,583
Gilfoyle, "rad"?
277
00:12:17,583 --> 00:12:20,917
You are wearing
the exact same pajamas
as Dinesh,
278
00:12:20,917 --> 00:12:22,500
and you're saying
"rad" now?
279
00:12:22,500 --> 00:12:26,583
You have been sucked
entirely into his little...
Keenan vortex.
280
00:12:26,583 --> 00:12:27,959
Okay.
281
00:12:27,959 --> 00:12:29,959
I grant you, with...
(clears throat)
282
00:12:29,959 --> 00:12:32,625
the benefit of even
a second's distance,
283
00:12:32,625 --> 00:12:33,917
this isn't a good look.
284
00:12:33,917 --> 00:12:35,917
I don't know.
I think we look rad.
285
00:12:35,917 --> 00:12:38,125
Just-- just
hear Keenan out, okay?
286
00:12:38,125 --> 00:12:41,208
On what?
Here you go, Richard.
287
00:12:41,208 --> 00:12:43,333
What's this?
It's an offer.
288
00:12:43,333 --> 00:12:46,041
I want to acquire
Pied Piper.
Oh.
289
00:12:46,041 --> 00:12:49,500
(scoffs)
(Keenan laughs)
290
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,667
♪ ♪
291
00:12:51,667 --> 00:12:56,000
Bingo-- 2009,
the HooliPad touchscreen
was recalled
292
00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:58,834
five days before Gavin Belson's
Hoolicon keynote.
293
00:12:58,834 --> 00:13:02,667
Now, if he can pull
something together that fast,
certainly I can.
294
00:13:02,667 --> 00:13:04,834
(keyboard clacking)
Well, sir, I really
don't see the value
295
00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:07,000
in you comparing yourself
so closely to Gavin Belson.
296
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:09,000
Meaning what exactly?
297
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,667
Nothing. Just that...
298
00:13:10,667 --> 00:13:14,834
he's considered
the greatest showman
the tech world has ever seen.
299
00:13:14,834 --> 00:13:16,041
(keyboard clacks)
300
00:13:16,041 --> 00:13:18,041
I mean,
just look at him.
301
00:13:18,041 --> 00:13:19,417
We've blown away
302
00:13:19,417 --> 00:13:22,500
the FIPS 140-2 standard
for security,
303
00:13:22,500 --> 00:13:27,000
and that's been certified
by NIST/CSE, as you can see...
304
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,375
Jack: Wow.
...there.
305
00:13:28,375 --> 00:13:31,792
(crowd cheering)
Look at the confidence,
the poise.
306
00:13:31,792 --> 00:13:33,041
Look at the stage presence.
307
00:13:33,041 --> 00:13:37,375
...is accessible--
here we go--
308
00:13:37,375 --> 00:13:39,667
through the drop-down menu...
309
00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:42,458
there.
How could I top that?
310
00:13:42,458 --> 00:13:44,959
(crowd cheering)
Oh, I don't think
anyone ever will.
311
00:13:44,959 --> 00:13:48,000
When he looked at you,
you felt like you were
312
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,041
the only two people
in the world.
Hoover.
313
00:13:50,041 --> 00:13:51,834
Yes, sir.
(Gavin continues speaking)
314
00:13:51,834 --> 00:13:54,375
Get the fuck
out of my office
this instant.
315
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,792
Hoover:
Sorry, sir.
(Gavin continues speaking)
316
00:13:56,792 --> 00:13:59,041
Anyone here use
our enterprise server?
317
00:13:59,041 --> 00:14:00,625
We've taken
secure authentication
318
00:14:00,625 --> 00:14:02,750
to a whole other level.
Jack Barker...
319
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,208
you're gonna need a miracle.
320
00:14:04,208 --> 00:14:07,208
Anyone care to talk
secure biometrics?
321
00:14:07,208 --> 00:14:09,625
Well, considering
our looming debts,
322
00:14:09,625 --> 00:14:11,417
and the embryonic state
of our network,
323
00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:13,417
this is a very generous offer.
324
00:14:13,417 --> 00:14:15,208
But we're not for sale, guys.
325
00:14:15,208 --> 00:14:17,709
Richard, listen, it's like
we've been lost at sea
326
00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:19,458
for a long time on a tiny boat,
327
00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:20,750
and there is no wind.
328
00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:22,583
And now, through sheer luck,
329
00:14:22,583 --> 00:14:24,917
we've just happen to drift
right up to Hawaii.
330
00:14:24,917 --> 00:14:27,834
Now, we can continue sailing
into the unknown,
331
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:30,875
and probably sink or die
of starvation or scurvy,
332
00:14:30,875 --> 00:14:33,291
or we can get off in Hawaii.
333
00:14:33,291 --> 00:14:35,250
Let's get off in Hawaii.
334
00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:37,667
What's so good
about Hawaii?
Have you never been?
335
00:14:37,667 --> 00:14:40,083
No.
It's very nice.
336
00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:42,583
I think we should take it.
337
00:14:42,583 --> 00:14:45,291
Okay, everything
Keenan touches turns to gold,
338
00:14:45,291 --> 00:14:46,291
and you...
339
00:14:47,834 --> 00:14:49,375
are different than that.
340
00:14:49,375 --> 00:14:52,333
(door opens, closes)
I want to go to Hawaii.
341
00:14:55,458 --> 00:14:57,959
Fucking Keenan Feldspar.
342
00:14:57,959 --> 00:14:59,667
How dare he put me
in this position?
343
00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:02,083
Everything just comes
so easy to him.
344
00:15:02,083 --> 00:15:04,959
He invents one little thing,
and then he's gonna make
a billion dollars,
345
00:15:04,959 --> 00:15:07,625
and just,
"Oh, Keenan Feldspar gets
whatever he wants,"
346
00:15:07,625 --> 00:15:09,959
and now I have to be
the ogre that says no
to him. Great.
347
00:15:09,959 --> 00:15:13,542
Richard, you are my captain,
and I'm your mate.
348
00:15:13,542 --> 00:15:16,041
And I will sleep
in the bilge with the vermin,
349
00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:18,583
and I will eat hardtack,
and I will say, "Thank you."
350
00:15:18,583 --> 00:15:20,875
And if duty requires,
I will stand on deck,
351
00:15:20,875 --> 00:15:24,125
and I will salute you
as we sink beneath the waves.
352
00:15:24,125 --> 00:15:26,000
But as poor as our odds are,
353
00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,542
I'm worried that
if we turn down this offer,
354
00:15:28,542 --> 00:15:30,000
we will lose
the rest of our crew,
355
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,500
and if that happens,
you will lose everything,
356
00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:35,375
Richard.
Your algorithm.
357
00:15:35,375 --> 00:15:37,875
So, you're saying that
358
00:15:37,875 --> 00:15:39,500
if I say no to this...
359
00:15:40,667 --> 00:15:42,458
I risk having a mutiny
on my hands.
360
00:15:43,417 --> 00:15:45,208
Aye, Captain.
361
00:15:46,375 --> 00:15:47,667
Thanks.
362
00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:52,834
(papers rustle)
363
00:15:55,291 --> 00:15:57,458
(scoffs)
364
00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,917
Fuck you,
Keenan Feldspar.
365
00:16:02,917 --> 00:16:05,041
Whoa.
Problem?
366
00:16:06,208 --> 00:16:08,959
Your counteroffer here
is really, really high.
367
00:16:08,959 --> 00:16:12,250
Yes, but after crunching
the old numbies, um,
368
00:16:12,250 --> 00:16:14,834
there's no way we could make
an acquisition work
369
00:16:14,834 --> 00:16:17,083
for even just a penny less
than that number right there,
370
00:16:17,083 --> 00:16:19,125
you know,
what with the patent
and the IP.
371
00:16:19,125 --> 00:16:21,166
And you said yourself,
my guys are the best.
372
00:16:21,166 --> 00:16:24,375
So, Keenan, as you know,
the best is expensive.
373
00:16:24,375 --> 00:16:27,458
This is more than I just took
in funding from Bream-Hall,
374
00:16:27,458 --> 00:16:29,291
and you want all cash.
375
00:16:29,291 --> 00:16:31,041
I can't do that.
Really?
376
00:16:31,041 --> 00:16:34,709
Oh... rats.
Rats, rats, rats.
377
00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:37,041
(sighs)
Weird.
378
00:16:37,041 --> 00:16:39,750
I wanted this to happen,
but it didn't.
379
00:16:39,750 --> 00:16:43,834
That sucks.
I wanted it too,
very badly.
380
00:16:43,834 --> 00:16:46,792
But, um... you know,
what they say in life,
381
00:16:46,792 --> 00:16:48,417
"You can't always get
what you want."
382
00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:50,458
This feeling sucks.
383
00:16:50,458 --> 00:16:51,917
Trust me,
you get used to it.
384
00:16:53,375 --> 00:16:54,542
♪ ♪
385
00:16:54,542 --> 00:16:57,125
Gilfoyle:
Wait. Keenan said no?
386
00:16:57,125 --> 00:17:00,250
To us?
I guess you can never
really know someone
387
00:17:00,250 --> 00:17:03,709
until you ask them
to put their money
where their mouth is.
388
00:17:03,709 --> 00:17:06,583
You know,
kind of a shitty thing to do.
389
00:17:06,583 --> 00:17:08,375
Kind of a shitty
little dude.
390
00:17:09,750 --> 00:17:11,709
Anyway, well,
lesson learned.
391
00:17:11,709 --> 00:17:14,625
Anyhoo, as soon
as Erlich comes in
392
00:17:14,625 --> 00:17:18,083
and brings us our signed
data storage contract
393
00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:20,750
from Keenan, we'll be all set.
We'll be back in business.
394
00:17:20,750 --> 00:17:22,917
Huh? Go team.
Let's celebrate.
395
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,917
Let's-- let's put on some music.
We never do that.
396
00:17:24,917 --> 00:17:26,959
What was the number?
397
00:17:26,959 --> 00:17:29,166
What number?
Your counteroffer
to Keenan.
398
00:17:29,166 --> 00:17:30,875
What was the number
you went back to him with?
399
00:17:30,875 --> 00:17:34,000
Well, Gilfoyle,
to be honest, these deals
are pretty complicated.
400
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,792
Richard, what was
the number?
(door opens)
401
00:17:36,792 --> 00:17:39,583
Twenty-five million
fucking dollars.
402
00:17:39,583 --> 00:17:41,750
(door closes)
Wait. What?
403
00:17:41,750 --> 00:17:43,792
You heard
the man-child right.
404
00:17:43,792 --> 00:17:47,208
Richie had the quail eggs
to counter 25 million.
405
00:17:47,208 --> 00:17:48,291
Isn't that right, Richard?
406
00:17:48,291 --> 00:17:50,709
What?
That's fucking crazy.
407
00:17:50,709 --> 00:17:52,125
Yeah, I thought so too,
408
00:17:52,125 --> 00:17:54,125
but you know what's
even crazier than that?
409
00:17:56,250 --> 00:17:58,625
You guys got yourself
a fucking deal!
410
00:17:58,625 --> 00:18:00,500
(laughs)
What?
411
00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:05,125
Okay, so this
is $25 million?
This is real?
412
00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:07,959
As crystal.
Yeah, I'm--
I'm not gonna lie,
413
00:18:07,959 --> 00:18:09,834
when you first
told me that number,
414
00:18:09,834 --> 00:18:11,792
I had a feeling of mad.
415
00:18:11,792 --> 00:18:14,959
But then I had lunch,
and after that I was
a little tired,
416
00:18:14,959 --> 00:18:16,875
but I mostly felt
pretty okay.
417
00:18:16,875 --> 00:18:18,542
And that's when it hit me.
418
00:18:18,542 --> 00:18:21,625
This is a guy who knows
how valuable he is!
419
00:18:21,625 --> 00:18:24,667
It got me to thinking
that perhaps I had undervalued
my own company,
420
00:18:24,667 --> 00:18:28,083
especially because now
I have this baller algorithm
421
00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:29,542
that's solving
all my latency issues.
422
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:32,041
Well, my algorithm.
So, I called Big Cat here,
423
00:18:32,041 --> 00:18:33,834
and we slid
that new demo
over to Raviga.
424
00:18:33,834 --> 00:18:37,834
Ed Chen liked it so much,
he offered to triple
the Bream-Hall deal.
425
00:18:37,834 --> 00:18:40,834
But the Bream-Hall deal
is signed. It's done, right?
426
00:18:40,834 --> 00:18:45,875
Was done.
Enter the keyman,
the big cat.
427
00:18:45,875 --> 00:18:51,000
You see, if I quit Bream-Hall,
then Keenan is free to do
whatever he wants.
428
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,875
You quit Bream-Hall?
Two hours ago.
429
00:18:53,875 --> 00:18:57,125
Ten minutes later, we were
in a handshake deal at Raviga.
430
00:18:57,125 --> 00:18:59,959
This adorable little wombat
made clear his intentions
431
00:18:59,959 --> 00:19:02,458
that he wants me
to be the new COO
432
00:19:02,458 --> 00:19:05,875
of his company, along with
a five percent stake.
433
00:19:05,875 --> 00:19:09,250
And now,
we can all work together
on this dope-ass shit
434
00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:11,542
and make a fuck-ton of money
while we're doing it!
435
00:19:11,542 --> 00:19:14,000
See? It always
works out.
436
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:16,417
It does. Who's drinking?
To the palapa!
Yeah!
437
00:19:16,417 --> 00:19:18,458
Pour me one, Big Cat!
438
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,125
Dinesh:
Jared, there's
no pink glasses!
439
00:19:20,125 --> 00:19:23,875
Richard, I know you think
I'm a bullshit artist.
440
00:19:23,875 --> 00:19:25,875
It's okay.
I totally am.
441
00:19:25,875 --> 00:19:29,333
I have this gift
where I can make people do
whatever I want 'em to do,
442
00:19:29,333 --> 00:19:31,041
and they don't even realize
they're doing it.
Right.
443
00:19:31,041 --> 00:19:34,041
Richard, you have
the greatest technology
that I've ever seen.
444
00:19:34,041 --> 00:19:35,583
You can change
the fucking world.
445
00:19:35,583 --> 00:19:37,792
You just have to get
people excited about it.
446
00:19:37,792 --> 00:19:40,083
That's where I come in.
You and me together, bro?
447
00:19:40,083 --> 00:19:42,583
Look how strong this is.
Fucking forget about it.
448
00:19:42,583 --> 00:19:45,750
We're gonna be
fucking cutting class
and crushing ass.
449
00:19:45,750 --> 00:19:49,417
You really think
that you can get people
excited about Pied Piper?
450
00:19:49,417 --> 00:19:51,959
Richard,
that's what I do.
451
00:19:51,959 --> 00:19:54,834
You know you're doing it.
Oh, I can see it.
(chuckles)
452
00:19:54,834 --> 00:19:57,375
He knows. The wheels
are already turning.
Well--
453
00:19:57,375 --> 00:19:59,125
Maybe.
Come on,
you're fucking doing it!
454
00:19:59,125 --> 00:20:01,250
Let's do it, buddy!
Let's fucking do it!
Okay. Yeah.
455
00:20:01,250 --> 00:20:03,709
Come on!
Well, okay.
456
00:20:03,709 --> 00:20:06,291
Jared, here we go.
Oh, I'm just gonna wait.
457
00:20:06,291 --> 00:20:08,417
Okay, here you are.
Yeah!
458
00:20:08,417 --> 00:20:10,750
Keenan:
Get out there! (laughs)
459
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,625
(panting)
460
00:20:13,625 --> 00:20:14,917
Richard?
Richard: Yeah.
461
00:20:14,917 --> 00:20:16,041
Are-- are we okay?
462
00:20:16,041 --> 00:20:18,583
Uh, no, Jared,
we're-- we're not okay.
463
00:20:18,583 --> 00:20:20,667
(crickets chirping)
464
00:20:20,667 --> 00:20:22,208
We're fucking rich.
465
00:20:22,208 --> 00:20:24,917
(cheering)
♪ When we come down
terrorizing your town ♪
466
00:20:24,917 --> 00:20:27,458
♪ Running with my wolves,
and we out on the prowl ♪
467
00:20:27,458 --> 00:20:29,417
♪ If you didn't know it,
you knowing it now ♪
468
00:20:29,417 --> 00:20:32,250
♪ I'll always be
a motha-fucking
problem child ♪
469
00:20:32,250 --> 00:20:34,458
♪ We the boys
everybody warned you about ♪
470
00:20:34,458 --> 00:20:37,542
♪ I'm a problem child,
I be throwing tantrums ♪
471
00:20:37,542 --> 00:20:40,667
Sorry, it's a bit nutty
around here.
472
00:20:40,667 --> 00:20:43,542
Yeah. (clears throat)
Well, I just wanna say,
473
00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:47,333
how sorry I am
that Erlich flaked
on you guys.
474
00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:50,625
Not your fault.
Also... (clears throat)
475
00:20:50,625 --> 00:20:53,834
and I know
this might piss you off
to some degree,
476
00:20:53,834 --> 00:20:56,667
I have decided to make a deal
with Keenan Feldspar.
477
00:20:56,667 --> 00:20:58,291
What? Why?
478
00:20:58,291 --> 00:21:01,166
He made a...
really good offer.
479
00:21:01,166 --> 00:21:05,166
Lots of money, and...
he's got my back, so.
480
00:21:05,166 --> 00:21:07,458
Right, well,
it's not like him
to talk you into a deal
481
00:21:07,458 --> 00:21:09,375
and then just
totally fuck you over.
482
00:21:09,375 --> 00:21:13,208
Yeah. No.
Look, he's copped up
to all that.
483
00:21:13,208 --> 00:21:16,959
I mean, he was
very honest about the whole
Keenan vortex thing, so.
484
00:21:16,959 --> 00:21:18,917
Well, you don't think
his discussing the vortex
485
00:21:18,917 --> 00:21:21,125
is just a way of pulling you
into the vortex?
486
00:21:21,125 --> 00:21:22,959
No. Wh-why would he-- wh...
487
00:21:26,625 --> 00:21:27,834
Son of a bitch.
488
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,000
Yeah.
489
00:21:31,834 --> 00:21:35,542
Okay, look, Richard,
490
00:21:35,542 --> 00:21:38,792
what I'm about to tell you
is a huge breach of ethics,
491
00:21:38,792 --> 00:21:41,709
but it's gonna save you
from making a big mistake.
492
00:21:41,709 --> 00:21:44,333
Keenan and Erlich's
little keyman game
493
00:21:44,333 --> 00:21:47,500
is the greatest thing
that happened to this firm.
494
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:51,041
I'd like to hear why.
"A," no more Erlich.
495
00:21:51,041 --> 00:21:53,709
And if that weren't enough,
we get our $20 million back.
496
00:21:53,709 --> 00:21:57,709
But the biggest reason
is that we realized once
we took a look under the hood,
497
00:21:57,709 --> 00:21:59,542
Keenan's tech is dog shit.
498
00:21:59,542 --> 00:22:01,875
No. No, it's not dog shit.
499
00:22:01,875 --> 00:22:04,000
I thought so too,
but then I tried the demo,
500
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:07,208
and it's pretty amazing.
There's this point
in the tavern,
501
00:22:07,208 --> 00:22:08,625
uh, where you meet
this barmaid,
502
00:22:08,625 --> 00:22:10,709
and you can look
wherever you want,
503
00:22:10,709 --> 00:22:12,125
however long you want.
504
00:22:12,125 --> 00:22:15,750
Yeah, well, um, look,
the demo is amazing...
505
00:22:15,750 --> 00:22:18,083
when you run it
on a $10,000 rig.
506
00:22:18,083 --> 00:22:19,959
But the future
of VR is mobile,
507
00:22:19,959 --> 00:22:22,291
and there's no phone on Earth
that could handle that demo,
508
00:22:22,291 --> 00:22:24,125
let alone
the full-bloated platform.
509
00:22:24,125 --> 00:22:27,083
Isn't that why
Keenan has acquired us?
510
00:22:27,083 --> 00:22:28,792
I mean, to help him
figure that out?
511
00:22:28,792 --> 00:22:30,917
No, he just wants you
to make the demo better
512
00:22:30,917 --> 00:22:33,250
so he can take as much money
off the table as he can.
513
00:22:33,250 --> 00:22:36,166
He'll walk away rich,
the company will crater,
514
00:22:36,166 --> 00:22:38,083
and you will
go down with it,
515
00:22:38,083 --> 00:22:39,959
and that would be
the end of Pied Piper.
516
00:22:39,959 --> 00:22:43,291
Richard, you have
to tell Keenan that you're
not gonna take this deal.
517
00:22:46,250 --> 00:22:47,583
(sighs)
518
00:22:47,583 --> 00:22:49,417
Fuck. What do I do?
519
00:22:49,417 --> 00:22:52,625
How am I supposed
to tell the guys that I'm
taking away their payday?
520
00:22:52,625 --> 00:22:55,250
You don't understand.
Keenan had us pouring champagne
521
00:22:55,250 --> 00:22:57,291
all over each other like
a bunch of fucking douchebags.
522
00:22:57,291 --> 00:23:01,333
I honestly don't think
they even care that
the tech is shit.
523
00:23:01,333 --> 00:23:02,792
They just want
to go to Hawaii.
524
00:23:02,792 --> 00:23:06,041
Hawaii?
It's a metaphor
we've been using.
525
00:23:06,041 --> 00:23:09,709
We're pirates,
and our ship is sinking,
526
00:23:09,709 --> 00:23:11,291
and Keenan is Hawaii.
527
00:23:12,208 --> 00:23:14,458
This is what
you talk about all day?
528
00:23:14,458 --> 00:23:18,000
Look. (clears throat)
This deal was our only hope,
529
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:21,208
and, with all due respect,
you run your own firm,
530
00:23:21,208 --> 00:23:24,583
and you're not exactly
chomping at the chance
to fund us, are you?
531
00:23:24,583 --> 00:23:26,208
Because you're
still theoretical.
532
00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:29,417
Look, I'll make you a promise.
If you can get all
of Melcher's data
533
00:23:29,417 --> 00:23:31,625
onto a stable network
of mobile devices
534
00:23:31,625 --> 00:23:33,458
and prove that this works,
535
00:23:33,458 --> 00:23:34,834
I will fund your "A" round.
536
00:23:34,834 --> 00:23:36,917
Really?
You have my word,
537
00:23:36,917 --> 00:23:39,000
but you have
to tell Keenan no deal.
538
00:23:42,208 --> 00:23:44,667
♪ ♪
539
00:23:59,667 --> 00:24:01,667
♪ ♪
540
00:24:05,542 --> 00:24:06,834
Uh, guys?
541
00:24:06,834 --> 00:24:09,000
Oh, he came
in the front this time.
542
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:12,709
Oh. (clears throat)
So, we need to talk to you.
543
00:24:12,709 --> 00:24:14,834
You need to talk to me?
544
00:24:14,834 --> 00:24:16,709
You may want
to have a seat.
545
00:24:16,709 --> 00:24:18,458
Okay.
546
00:24:21,458 --> 00:24:22,542
(clears throat)
547
00:24:24,083 --> 00:24:26,041
Is that a new... sweater?
548
00:24:26,041 --> 00:24:28,750
Hey, Richard,
there's some bad news.
549
00:24:32,125 --> 00:24:35,500
Jared:
Richard, right before Keenan
signed the Raviga deal,
550
00:24:35,500 --> 00:24:38,250
somebody else swooped in
and offered him
551
00:24:38,250 --> 00:24:40,709
an absurd amount
of money for his company,
552
00:24:40,709 --> 00:24:43,959
and he took it.
Really?
553
00:24:43,959 --> 00:24:46,333
So, Keenan sold
his company.
554
00:24:46,333 --> 00:24:48,083
Deal's off the table.
555
00:24:48,083 --> 00:24:50,083
We're not going to Hawaii.
556
00:24:50,083 --> 00:24:53,834
Oh... no.
557
00:24:53,834 --> 00:24:56,875
Oh no.
558
00:24:56,875 --> 00:25:00,250
Listen, Richard, we know
you fought really hard
for this deal.
559
00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:01,709
We will never
forget that.
560
00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:03,458
Yeah, I did,
and I would gladly fight
561
00:25:03,458 --> 00:25:05,709
for it and you guys again.
562
00:25:05,709 --> 00:25:08,917
Gosh damn.
563
00:25:10,375 --> 00:25:11,959
Argh.
564
00:25:13,291 --> 00:25:14,792
You don't seem that mad.
565
00:25:14,792 --> 00:25:16,959
I am. I am, Gilfoyle.
I'm pissed.
566
00:25:16,959 --> 00:25:19,208
If-- if you need to kick
another hole in the door,
567
00:25:19,208 --> 00:25:21,667
we'd understand.
Oh yeah. No, I-- I might.
568
00:25:21,667 --> 00:25:23,417
I might have to.
Really, I just...
569
00:25:23,417 --> 00:25:25,583
If I don't calm down, I will.
570
00:25:25,583 --> 00:25:27,458
I will take you up on that.
571
00:25:27,458 --> 00:25:29,333
Who, uh...
572
00:25:29,333 --> 00:25:31,750
Who did he sell to?
The only other company
573
00:25:31,750 --> 00:25:35,500
that could guarantee viable
middle-out compression.
574
00:25:35,500 --> 00:25:36,917
Hooli.
Gilfoyle:
Yup.
575
00:25:36,917 --> 00:25:38,542
Hooli.
He sold to Hooli.
576
00:25:40,041 --> 00:25:41,083
What a dick move.
577
00:25:41,083 --> 00:25:43,542
Yeah, I mean,
that's not the half of it.
578
00:25:43,542 --> 00:25:46,709
I mean, once he figured out
what Erlich's five percent
would be worth,
579
00:25:46,709 --> 00:25:48,125
he left him out in the cold.
580
00:25:50,125 --> 00:25:52,333
Wait. He-- he got Erlich
to quit his job
581
00:25:52,333 --> 00:25:54,333
and then cut him
out of the deal?
582
00:25:54,333 --> 00:25:56,000
Gilfoyle:
Mm-hmm.
Jesus.
583
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,333
We thought you were cursed,
but maybe it was just
584
00:25:58,333 --> 00:25:59,959
your proximity to Erlich.
585
00:25:59,959 --> 00:26:02,125
I mean, that dude
must've driven a van
586
00:26:02,125 --> 00:26:04,625
over a bunch of gypsies
in a previous life.
587
00:26:05,959 --> 00:26:08,250
Where is he?
I saw him grab
his lighter
588
00:26:08,250 --> 00:26:11,291
and his bong and head out
to the palapa to sulk
a few minutes ago.
589
00:26:14,458 --> 00:26:16,166
Isn't that
his bong right there?
590
00:26:16,166 --> 00:26:17,625
Well, shit.
591
00:26:19,333 --> 00:26:21,625
♪ ♪
592
00:26:23,709 --> 00:26:26,458
(fire crackling)
593
00:26:28,667 --> 00:26:30,000
Guys, there's a fire!
594
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,667
We need the fire guys.
595
00:26:31,667 --> 00:26:32,834
Someone call
the fire guys!
596
00:26:34,333 --> 00:26:35,875
(distantly)
Erlich!
597
00:26:35,875 --> 00:26:38,542
(crackling)
598
00:26:44,834 --> 00:26:46,125
(door opens)
599
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:56,583
Hey, buddy.
600
00:26:56,583 --> 00:26:58,542
Still not talking, huh?
601
00:26:58,542 --> 00:27:01,834
You've been out here
all night. It's freezing.
602
00:27:01,834 --> 00:27:04,125
You sure you don't wanna
come back inside?
603
00:27:05,667 --> 00:27:07,041
(sighs)
604
00:27:10,750 --> 00:27:12,291
Yeah, it was
a nice palapa.
605
00:27:12,291 --> 00:27:16,792
Well, concrete's still
pretty warm from the fire.
606
00:27:16,792 --> 00:27:19,083
He should be okay
for at least a few more hours.
607
00:27:19,083 --> 00:27:21,375
Well, that's probably longer
than we'll be in business.
608
00:27:21,375 --> 00:27:24,917
Yeah, we got our first
past-due notice from Azure.
609
00:27:24,917 --> 00:27:27,500
They said we have
five business days
till they cut us off.
610
00:27:28,583 --> 00:27:30,542
If you guys
wanna feel worse...
611
00:27:31,500 --> 00:27:33,000
check this out.
612
00:27:35,375 --> 00:27:37,208
♪ ♪
Jack (on computer):
Come join us
613
00:27:37,208 --> 00:27:38,625
for an epic gathering
614
00:27:38,625 --> 00:27:42,917
where we come together
as one people, as visionaries.
615
00:27:42,917 --> 00:27:46,667
Man:
Is this not the most exciting
time to be in technology?
616
00:27:46,667 --> 00:27:49,625
(crowd cheering)
The whole thing is
just like, "Wow."
617
00:27:49,625 --> 00:27:54,250
Jack:
The most transformative
technology event in the world.
618
00:27:54,250 --> 00:27:56,083
Hoolicon.
619
00:27:56,083 --> 00:27:57,917
See you all at Hoolicon!
620
00:27:57,917 --> 00:28:01,208
I hope you're excited.
I know "vee are."
621
00:28:01,208 --> 00:28:03,083
Yeah, VR.
622
00:28:03,083 --> 00:28:05,375
Fucking Keenan Feldspar.
623
00:28:07,250 --> 00:28:08,500
♪ ♪
624
00:28:08,500 --> 00:28:10,959
Jared, how many people
attend Hoolicon?
625
00:28:10,959 --> 00:28:12,750
About a quarter
of a million...
626
00:28:12,750 --> 00:28:13,917
over the whole weekend.
627
00:28:13,917 --> 00:28:16,041
And, Gilfoyle, um,
how many more phones
628
00:28:16,041 --> 00:28:17,917
do we need
to get us off Azure?
629
00:28:17,917 --> 00:28:19,875
A hundred
and twenty-three thousand,
630
00:28:19,875 --> 00:28:21,250
give or take.
631
00:28:22,250 --> 00:28:24,041
Dinesh, how much
are tickets to Hoolicon?
632
00:28:24,041 --> 00:28:26,583
Why would I have
that information?
633
00:28:26,583 --> 00:28:31,083
(rock music playing)
634
00:28:40,083 --> 00:28:43,625
♪ Tell me what you think,
are we in trouble? ♪
635
00:28:43,625 --> 00:28:47,458
♪ Feeling sorry's never
really been my struggle ♪
636
00:28:47,458 --> 00:28:51,125
♪ Picking up the pieces,
sifting through the rubble ♪
637
00:28:51,125 --> 00:28:55,000
♪ Ringing in the new year,
listening to the Double ♪
638
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:56,792
♪ Are we outside ♪
639
00:28:56,792 --> 00:29:02,458
♪ The safe spaces of love ♪
640
00:29:02,458 --> 00:29:06,125
♪ Are we in space,
pinned down ♪
641
00:29:06,125 --> 00:29:10,125
♪ To spinning rocks? ♪
642
00:29:10,125 --> 00:29:14,166
♪ How you ♪
643
00:29:14,166 --> 00:29:17,959
♪ Freeze me ♪
644
00:29:17,959 --> 00:29:24,542
♪ We're so
cold now ♪
645
00:29:24,542 --> 00:29:28,208
♪ Are we outside
in space? ♪
646
00:29:28,208 --> 00:29:33,125
♪ So cold, so cold ♪
647
00:29:37,917 --> 00:29:39,750
Richard, I will not help you
on this mission.
648
00:29:39,750 --> 00:29:40,834
It's a means to an end.
649
00:29:41,417 --> 00:29:43,875
You are always telling me how
you spent your entire childhood
650
00:29:44,166 --> 00:29:47,000
pretending that everything going
on around you was okay.
651
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,000
Uncle Jerry's game.
652
00:29:48,333 --> 00:29:50,041
Let's play...
Uncle Jerry's game.
653
00:29:50,542 --> 00:29:52,125
Do you know what you're asking?
654
00:29:53,875 --> 00:29:57,208
Pied Piper were a last minute
add to the vendor list.
655
00:29:58,125 --> 00:30:00,875
Don't get caught and remember
why you're here.
656
00:30:01,083 --> 00:30:03,875
You guys ready to
see the future?
657
00:30:03,875 --> 00:30:06,959
Think of it more as, um,
forced adoption through
658
00:30:06,959 --> 00:30:08,041
aggressive guerilla marketing.
659
00:30:08,583 --> 00:30:11,041
Well, as a product of forced
adoption, I can assure you
660
00:30:11,041 --> 00:30:12,542
there are consequences.
51397
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