All language subtitles for The Moodys (US) - 01x05 - Episode 5.TBS.English.HI.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,262 --> 00:00:05,788 DAN: Uh... can-can I come in for a sec? 2 00:00:05,813 --> 00:00:07,859 Yes. Sure. 3 00:00:08,527 --> 00:00:10,927 Uh, I-I was gonna call you, 4 00:00:10,959 --> 00:00:14,296 but then I thought I'd wake you, so I just, uh... 5 00:00:15,121 --> 00:00:17,507 Well, this, uh, brings us here... 6 00:00:17,532 --> 00:00:18,982 Me waking you up anyway. 7 00:00:19,007 --> 00:00:20,967 - Yeah. - Is it o-okay 8 00:00:20,992 --> 00:00:23,514 - if I just, uh, sit? Yeah? - Yes. 9 00:00:23,539 --> 00:00:24,570 Good. 10 00:00:25,554 --> 00:00:27,703 All right, so, uh... 11 00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:29,528 Yeah, um... 12 00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:33,649 Look, we've only known each other a couple days, 13 00:00:33,674 --> 00:00:36,351 but I think there's something here. 14 00:00:36,590 --> 00:00:39,522 And I'm pretty sure you feel it, too. 15 00:00:39,773 --> 00:00:43,264 Yeah. I mean, no, I... 16 00:00:43,289 --> 00:00:44,817 You got my head spinning. 17 00:00:44,852 --> 00:00:47,086 I can't stop thinking about you. 18 00:00:47,121 --> 00:00:49,328 But I'm dating your cousin. 19 00:00:49,353 --> 00:00:51,701 I feel terrible about that. Um... 20 00:00:51,726 --> 00:00:53,139 And I'm happy with him. 21 00:00:53,164 --> 00:00:55,261 Because Marco's a great guy. Of course you like him. 22 00:00:55,286 --> 00:00:56,952 All girls like him. Everyone likes him. 23 00:00:56,977 --> 00:00:58,610 But that's still not the same thing 24 00:00:58,635 --> 00:01:00,523 that's going on between us. 25 00:01:03,445 --> 00:01:05,214 Yes, 26 00:01:05,239 --> 00:01:07,439 maybe there's something here. 27 00:01:08,781 --> 00:01:11,460 - But, Dan... - What? What? 28 00:01:13,226 --> 00:01:15,342 You're a disaster. 29 00:01:15,367 --> 00:01:18,317 - Well, I-I'm not a disaster. I... - Yes. 30 00:01:18,342 --> 00:01:19,671 Every day since you've been home, 31 00:01:19,696 --> 00:01:21,414 you've done something disastrous. 32 00:01:21,439 --> 00:01:24,033 Well, it's been a rough week. But it's-it's hard to defend. 33 00:01:24,058 --> 00:01:25,992 No, no, no, no, no. 34 00:01:26,017 --> 00:01:28,017 I can't date another disaster. 35 00:01:28,062 --> 00:01:29,804 My last boyfriend was a drummer, 36 00:01:29,829 --> 00:01:31,787 and the one before that had a food truck. 37 00:01:31,812 --> 00:01:33,232 - So... - Okay. 38 00:01:33,257 --> 00:01:36,859 I've obviously been flirting with you. 39 00:01:37,328 --> 00:01:38,592 You have. 40 00:01:38,617 --> 00:01:39,950 And I shouldn't have. 41 00:01:39,975 --> 00:01:41,508 Look... 42 00:01:41,828 --> 00:01:44,101 I have five days left here. 43 00:01:44,773 --> 00:01:46,664 Let's see what this is. 44 00:01:49,453 --> 00:01:51,068 I want to give it a shot with Marco. 45 00:01:51,093 --> 00:01:53,104 - Look, Cora, no, you can't... - Dan. 46 00:01:53,903 --> 00:01:55,437 Please. 47 00:02:13,727 --> 00:02:15,867 Have yourself 48 00:02:16,242 --> 00:02:19,576 A merry little Christmas 49 00:02:19,601 --> 00:02:20,965 Ugh. 50 00:02:21,273 --> 00:02:23,334 Let your heart 51 00:02:23,359 --> 00:02:26,359 - Be glad - [PHONE BUZZES] 52 00:02:28,750 --> 00:02:30,709 From now on 53 00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:32,911 Our troubles 54 00:02:32,936 --> 00:02:37,156 Will be out of sight... 55 00:02:41,622 --> 00:02:43,655 Okay. Uh, thank you. 56 00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:45,801 - _ - Yeah, I guess I'll talk to you later. 57 00:02:45,826 --> 00:02:47,292 Thank you for having me. 58 00:02:47,317 --> 00:02:48,781 ELENA: I'll see you later. 59 00:02:49,462 --> 00:02:51,460 Thank you for having me? 60 00:02:52,921 --> 00:02:54,429 Oh, hey, lads. 61 00:02:54,454 --> 00:02:55,720 - Hey. - Hey. 62 00:02:55,745 --> 00:02:57,612 Mind if I join you? 63 00:02:57,637 --> 00:02:58,953 I guess. 64 00:03:00,140 --> 00:03:02,398 [ROARING, SHOOTING ON TABLET] 65 00:03:03,454 --> 00:03:05,164 What are we watching? 66 00:03:05,189 --> 00:03:06,476 Something with aliens. 67 00:03:06,501 --> 00:03:08,576 - Are we married to that? - Nah. 68 00:03:08,601 --> 00:03:10,945 - Nah. - The answer I was looking for. 69 00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:14,218 Do you guys like World War II documentaries? 70 00:03:14,243 --> 00:03:16,844 SEAN SR.: Yes, Monsignor. I'm bringing my A game. 71 00:03:16,869 --> 00:03:18,585 Okay, I'll see you tonight. 72 00:03:19,171 --> 00:03:22,103 Girls, you are looking at tonight's 73 00:03:22,128 --> 00:03:24,820 Midnight Mass... lector. 74 00:03:24,845 --> 00:03:26,008 - BRIDGET: Oh, my God! - Honey, you did it. 75 00:03:26,032 --> 00:03:27,898 What is it... Ten years in the making? 76 00:03:27,923 --> 00:03:29,843 15, and it took Steve Lombardo going down 77 00:03:29,868 --> 00:03:31,968 with a tracheotomy, but it still feels sweet. 78 00:03:31,993 --> 00:03:34,889 - What are you reading? - I am reading... 79 00:03:34,914 --> 00:03:37,490 a little something from the book of... 80 00:03:37,515 --> 00:03:38,576 [CLEARS THROAT] 81 00:03:38,601 --> 00:03:39,883 Oh, boy. 82 00:03:40,009 --> 00:03:42,326 "Ecclesi-ass-tuh." 83 00:03:42,351 --> 00:03:43,715 [LAUGHS] 84 00:03:43,740 --> 00:03:46,826 "Ecclesi-at-ees." "Ecclesi-at-ees." 85 00:03:46,851 --> 00:03:49,039 "Ecclesi-asum." I've-I've always 86 00:03:49,064 --> 00:03:50,498 - had trouble with this one. - Yeah. 87 00:03:50,523 --> 00:03:52,476 Hon, get out of your head, 'cause you got this. 88 00:03:52,501 --> 00:03:54,414 Why would you say that to me now, okay? 89 00:03:54,439 --> 00:03:57,606 They couldn't have picked, like, a Joshua or a, you know, Paul? 90 00:03:57,631 --> 00:04:01,521 You know, I'm gonna take Leon for his walk. 91 00:04:01,546 --> 00:04:02,611 Small reminder. 92 00:04:02,636 --> 00:04:04,502 - What? - Just the family tonight. 93 00:04:04,527 --> 00:04:06,615 No stragglers, no random addicts. 94 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:08,382 This is really important to me. 95 00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,719 I heard you the first two times. 96 00:04:10,744 --> 00:04:12,310 Come on, Leon Redbone. 97 00:04:12,890 --> 00:04:14,531 You can do this. 98 00:04:14,801 --> 00:04:16,434 - Come on. - No, you need... 99 00:04:16,459 --> 00:04:18,328 You need the, uh, peanut butter pretzels. 100 00:04:18,353 --> 00:04:20,920 I tried. He's getting pickier and pickier. 101 00:04:20,945 --> 00:04:22,664 Yeah, it's 'cause he's... 102 00:04:22,689 --> 00:04:24,703 slowly turning into a footstool. 103 00:04:24,728 --> 00:04:27,795 - He can't see or taste anything. - It's getting sad. 104 00:04:27,820 --> 00:04:30,554 Sad like it's getting to be that time, do you think? 105 00:04:30,968 --> 00:04:33,460 What, 18 years? That's a good run for a lab. 106 00:04:33,485 --> 00:04:35,531 You kidding me? Those are Chihuahua numbers. 107 00:04:37,737 --> 00:04:40,437 I'll talk to your mom after New Year's. 108 00:04:43,643 --> 00:04:45,375 - I'm going to bed. - No, you're not. 109 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:47,056 You're leaving for the shelter with your dad 110 00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:49,280 - in 20. - I didn't sleep much last night. 111 00:04:49,305 --> 00:04:51,529 I-I feel like the homeless will understand. 112 00:04:51,554 --> 00:04:53,335 They're not super judgey people. 113 00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:55,773 Yeah, I'm skipping that, too. Not in a great place. 114 00:04:55,798 --> 00:04:57,531 - Oh, if everyone's bailing... - ANN: No. 115 00:04:57,556 --> 00:04:59,401 No one is bailing, all right? 116 00:04:59,426 --> 00:05:00,959 We have traditions in this house. 117 00:05:00,994 --> 00:05:02,515 It's Christmas Eve. 118 00:05:02,540 --> 00:05:03,734 You volunteer at St. Mary, 119 00:05:03,759 --> 00:05:05,515 then I make a huge dinner, and then 120 00:05:05,540 --> 00:05:07,093 we go to Midnight Mass. 121 00:05:07,118 --> 00:05:10,078 We only did the St. Mary's thing, like, twice, and yes... 122 00:05:10,103 --> 00:05:12,136 Meaningful... But if I'm being honest, 123 00:05:12,161 --> 00:05:13,563 there were way too many people helping. 124 00:05:13,587 --> 00:05:14,813 Yeah. Last year, the line to serve 125 00:05:14,837 --> 00:05:16,257 the turkey was longer than the line to eat it. 126 00:05:16,281 --> 00:05:17,809 All right, cool. So wake me up at 4:00 127 00:05:17,844 --> 00:05:19,998 unless we could maybe push dinner to 5:00? 128 00:05:20,023 --> 00:05:22,060 Everyone, stop it. You're going. 129 00:05:22,085 --> 00:05:24,640 Mom, we're not kids anymore. You can't tell us what to do. 130 00:05:24,665 --> 00:05:26,461 Your father has cancer. 131 00:05:26,486 --> 00:05:28,132 - What? - Oh, my God. 132 00:05:28,522 --> 00:05:30,046 I'm sorry. 133 00:05:30,661 --> 00:05:33,085 I-I shouldn't have told you like that. 134 00:05:33,393 --> 00:05:34,992 I already knew. 135 00:05:35,523 --> 00:05:37,234 He told me first, 136 00:05:37,259 --> 00:05:40,437 but life isn't always a competition. 137 00:05:40,812 --> 00:05:42,600 It's not about that right now. 138 00:05:42,625 --> 00:05:44,937 - His prognosis is excellent. - Sean's right. 139 00:05:44,962 --> 00:05:46,865 - He has the best doctors. - Yeah. 140 00:05:46,890 --> 00:05:48,406 He's gonna be okay. 141 00:05:48,441 --> 00:05:51,304 But that is why I wanted this Christmas to be special. 142 00:05:51,329 --> 00:05:52,476 Hey. 143 00:05:54,207 --> 00:05:55,640 I love you, Dad. 144 00:05:55,665 --> 00:05:57,265 Oh. 145 00:05:57,906 --> 00:05:58,921 You told 'em. 146 00:05:58,946 --> 00:06:00,545 I-I did not. She did. 147 00:06:00,570 --> 00:06:02,670 They weren't gonna go to the shelter. 148 00:06:03,023 --> 00:06:04,500 How-how are you, Dad? 149 00:06:04,525 --> 00:06:06,592 - Are you okay? - Stop it, okay? 150 00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:08,329 I'm fine. I don't want you worrying about me. 151 00:06:08,353 --> 00:06:11,257 I-I think I should just move back home for a while. 152 00:06:11,282 --> 00:06:14,049 Listen, I don't want you putting your life on hold for me, okay? 153 00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:16,539 Stay in New York. I'm not going anywhere. All right? 154 00:06:16,564 --> 00:06:19,156 Honestly, things aren't so great for me over there anyway. 155 00:06:19,181 --> 00:06:21,614 Yeah, that's 'cause you picked a stupid way to make a living. 156 00:06:22,664 --> 00:06:24,289 Sorry. Listen. 157 00:06:25,359 --> 00:06:27,343 You know I was a hellraiser in high school, right? 158 00:06:27,368 --> 00:06:29,421 The M80 in typing class. 159 00:06:29,446 --> 00:06:32,160 Not even close to my best work. I was a terror. 160 00:06:32,185 --> 00:06:34,252 And at a certain point, the nuns gave me a choice. 161 00:06:34,277 --> 00:06:36,679 They were like, "Listen, you can either be in the school play, 162 00:06:36,703 --> 00:06:37,756 "or you're gonna be in detention 163 00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:39,301 for the rest of your high school career." 164 00:06:39,325 --> 00:06:41,310 - Okay? - Yeah, you were in Guys and Dolls, 165 00:06:41,335 --> 00:06:42,427 and you were good and... 166 00:06:42,462 --> 00:06:45,390 I was Sky Masterson, and I was incredible, okay? 167 00:06:45,421 --> 00:06:46,832 I was so incredible, the nuns wanted me 168 00:06:46,856 --> 00:06:48,823 to be the lead guy in every musical after that. 169 00:06:48,848 --> 00:06:50,710 And then I went to work for your grandfather, 170 00:06:50,735 --> 00:06:52,185 I meet your mother, 171 00:06:52,210 --> 00:06:55,296 you know, I fell in love and lived happily ever after. 172 00:06:55,321 --> 00:06:57,998 Now, in the back of my mind... 173 00:06:58,023 --> 00:06:59,945 Not all the time, just every once in a while... 174 00:06:59,970 --> 00:07:03,024 I think, what would have happened if I went to New York 175 00:07:03,049 --> 00:07:05,125 and I chased that acting dream, you know? 176 00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:08,435 - Really? - Yeah. I mean, probably nothing. 177 00:07:08,460 --> 00:07:11,122 You know? But that's one of the things I'm most proud of 178 00:07:11,147 --> 00:07:14,296 as a dad is, you get to go to New York and chase your dream. 179 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,920 - Oh. - No, don't be a wuss about it. 180 00:07:16,945 --> 00:07:17,945 Come on. We're up. 181 00:07:17,970 --> 00:07:19,336 BRIDGET: Oh, he's gonna be fine. 182 00:07:19,361 --> 00:07:21,478 I talked to one of my partners who works in medical malpractice. 183 00:07:21,502 --> 00:07:22,634 She ran the numbers. 184 00:07:22,659 --> 00:07:24,492 Dad's more likely to die in a car accident. 185 00:07:24,517 --> 00:07:27,389 I know I've had more time to process this than you have. 186 00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:29,273 - Okay. - I don't know why 187 00:07:29,298 --> 00:07:30,719 - Dad told me first. - Sean, I don't care 188 00:07:30,743 --> 00:07:32,687 - that Dad told you first. - You know, 189 00:07:32,712 --> 00:07:35,951 he and I have this kind of emotional connection, 190 00:07:35,976 --> 00:07:37,008 - so I get that. - All I care about is 191 00:07:37,032 --> 00:07:38,226 that he's gonna be fine. 192 00:07:38,251 --> 00:07:39,784 And he's gonna be fine. 193 00:07:39,809 --> 00:07:41,876 You're so where I was two days ago. 194 00:07:41,901 --> 00:07:43,467 No mashed potatoes? 195 00:07:43,492 --> 00:07:44,655 Uh, sorry, ma'am, 196 00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:46,580 - we just ran out. - Really? 197 00:07:46,605 --> 00:07:48,274 - Yeah. - You know what, any mashed potatoes 198 00:07:48,298 --> 00:07:49,359 back in the kitchen? 199 00:07:49,384 --> 00:07:52,320 - 86 the mashed potatoes! - Ah. Sorry. 200 00:07:52,345 --> 00:07:53,803 You want some brussels sprouts? 201 00:07:53,828 --> 00:07:54,960 Is that a joke? 202 00:07:54,985 --> 00:07:55,999 I wish it was. 203 00:07:56,024 --> 00:07:57,245 I shouldn't have snapped. 204 00:07:57,270 --> 00:07:58,836 It's just, this time of year, 205 00:07:58,861 --> 00:08:00,881 it's the little things you look forward to. 206 00:08:00,906 --> 00:08:03,007 - You have a right to mashed potatoes. - Right. 207 00:08:03,032 --> 00:08:06,878 Yeah, but anger is just one letter away from danger. 208 00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,249 Hey, are you guys in the program? 209 00:08:08,274 --> 00:08:10,757 Yeah, we both are. That's how we met. [CHUCKLES] 210 00:08:11,156 --> 00:08:12,842 Give me a second. Give me a second. 211 00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:14,140 Do you think maybe we could... 212 00:08:14,165 --> 00:08:16,212 - just invite... - Mom said just family. 213 00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:19,467 Right. Right. You know what, 214 00:08:19,492 --> 00:08:21,203 I'm gonna go talk to the chef. It's Christmas. 215 00:08:21,227 --> 00:08:23,895 Everybody deserves mashed potatoes, right? 216 00:08:24,695 --> 00:08:26,271 I think it's my turn. 217 00:08:26,296 --> 00:08:28,492 CHEF: There's no more damn mashed potatoes! 218 00:08:30,969 --> 00:08:33,795 - Hi, Mom. Smells lovely. - Hi! 219 00:08:33,820 --> 00:08:35,421 - SEAN SR.: Shelter was great. - DAN: Hi, Mom. 220 00:08:35,445 --> 00:08:38,467 - Thank you. - Mmm, mmm, mmm. 221 00:08:38,492 --> 00:08:40,218 No, no, no, no, no. You're letting the heat out. 222 00:08:40,242 --> 00:08:42,654 Oh, I'm just seeing what kind of crisp you got going on the skin. 223 00:08:42,678 --> 00:08:44,121 Mm, well, back off. 224 00:08:44,146 --> 00:08:45,490 You're not the only cook in the family. 225 00:08:45,514 --> 00:08:46,717 - I know. - Honey, can you please 226 00:08:46,741 --> 00:08:49,590 get rid of Stan's pie? I need the room in the fridge. 227 00:08:49,615 --> 00:08:51,724 Honey, he poured his heart and soul into that thing. 228 00:08:51,749 --> 00:08:53,349 Yeah, nobody wants it. 229 00:08:53,980 --> 00:08:57,748 Do you know how old I was when Dad gave me the BB gun? 230 00:08:57,773 --> 00:08:59,303 I think you were ten. 231 00:08:59,328 --> 00:09:01,693 Which is on the young side for a firearm. 232 00:09:01,718 --> 00:09:04,058 I guess there were some perks to his drinking. 233 00:09:04,083 --> 00:09:05,349 Do you think, like, a... 234 00:09:05,374 --> 00:09:07,378 mature seven-year-old could handle one? 235 00:09:07,403 --> 00:09:09,771 - Absolutely not. No. - Oh! 236 00:09:09,796 --> 00:09:12,316 Do you remember that time I shot Paul Ulibarri in the ass 237 00:09:12,341 --> 00:09:14,326 with this thing? It got infected, 238 00:09:14,351 --> 00:09:16,088 - but it was pretty funny. - Oh... [STAMMERS] 239 00:09:16,112 --> 00:09:17,755 - Could you not? - You know, I just... 240 00:09:17,780 --> 00:09:19,965 I want to get Elena's boys something. 241 00:09:19,990 --> 00:09:21,449 They're good boys, you know? 242 00:09:21,474 --> 00:09:23,050 They're really cool, and I just... 243 00:09:23,075 --> 00:09:26,030 I feel like I could encourage 244 00:09:26,055 --> 00:09:28,457 that, kind of, free-range male energy, you know? 245 00:09:28,482 --> 00:09:30,270 Get them out of the house and destroying stuff. 246 00:09:30,294 --> 00:09:32,427 You've had one date. Feels like a... 247 00:09:32,452 --> 00:09:34,130 like a pretty strong parenting move. 248 00:09:34,155 --> 00:09:36,640 Hey, here we go. 249 00:09:36,665 --> 00:09:38,899 The ninja box. 250 00:09:39,201 --> 00:09:41,363 Look at all this crap. 251 00:09:41,388 --> 00:09:43,704 Ooh, remember these bad boys? 252 00:09:43,739 --> 00:09:44,894 Yeah. 253 00:09:45,716 --> 00:09:48,042 [CHUCKLES]: Ooh...! 254 00:09:48,077 --> 00:09:49,610 Still got it. 255 00:09:50,746 --> 00:09:54,064 Do you ever feel like you were meant to be born in feudal Japan? 256 00:09:54,892 --> 00:09:56,603 Ecclesiastes. 257 00:09:56,628 --> 00:09:58,758 - It's working. It's definitely working. - Yeah. Uh-huh. 258 00:09:58,782 --> 00:09:59,854 - Okay. - I use it whenever I get stuck 259 00:09:59,878 --> 00:10:00,976 on a hard word at trial. 260 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,057 - Okay. - A law professor turned me on to it. 261 00:10:03,728 --> 00:10:05,329 - Ecclesiastes. [CHUCKLES] - Right? 262 00:10:05,354 --> 00:10:06,354 The physicalness of it 263 00:10:06,379 --> 00:10:07,757 - really just helps. - Yeah. 264 00:10:07,782 --> 00:10:09,596 - [EXHALES] - Declaratory judgment. 265 00:10:09,621 --> 00:10:10,621 Ecclesiastes. 266 00:10:10,646 --> 00:10:12,470 - Declaratory judgment. - Ecclesiastes. 267 00:10:12,495 --> 00:10:13,611 Declaratory judgment. 268 00:10:13,636 --> 00:10:15,351 - "Ecclezeeya-stick." - Mm-mmm. 269 00:10:15,376 --> 00:10:16,737 "Ecclezeeya-stick"? I mean... 270 00:10:16,762 --> 00:10:17,940 I don't know what that is, but 271 00:10:17,964 --> 00:10:19,350 - the goal is 30. - Okay. 272 00:10:19,375 --> 00:10:21,367 30? I'm not gonna get to 30. 273 00:10:21,392 --> 00:10:23,234 ANN [IN DISTANCE]: Roger and Mukta are here. 274 00:10:23,259 --> 00:10:24,898 Plan on coming up? 275 00:10:24,923 --> 00:10:27,236 Uh, we're doing some church stuff. 276 00:10:27,261 --> 00:10:29,929 So, we're thinking of doing a home birth. 277 00:10:29,954 --> 00:10:31,343 No, we're not. 278 00:10:31,368 --> 00:10:33,687 People say it's life-altering. 279 00:10:33,712 --> 00:10:35,775 MUKTA: I don't want to have the baby in our bathtub. 280 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:38,235 They bring a special birthing tub. It'll be beautiful. 281 00:10:38,260 --> 00:10:41,128 And you'll be surrounded by all of our friends and family. 282 00:10:41,153 --> 00:10:42,945 Well, not your whole family. 283 00:10:42,970 --> 00:10:45,032 Sean, why is there a BB gun in here? 284 00:10:45,057 --> 00:10:46,190 Why is it in here? 285 00:10:46,215 --> 00:10:47,259 He's got a crush. 286 00:10:47,284 --> 00:10:49,796 I was gonna wrap it, and then I got hungry. 287 00:10:49,821 --> 00:10:51,320 Well, please move it before dinner. 288 00:10:51,345 --> 00:10:53,570 - Thank you. - No promises. 289 00:10:53,595 --> 00:10:57,211 Ann, how would you like to be the steward of our... 290 00:10:57,236 --> 00:10:58,612 placenta? 291 00:10:59,757 --> 00:11:01,358 [DOORBELL RINGS] 292 00:11:01,806 --> 00:11:03,126 Who is that? 293 00:11:03,790 --> 00:11:07,431 Um, I wasn't gonna, um, say anything... 294 00:11:07,456 --> 00:11:09,182 because I wanted to see if they showed up. Yeah. 295 00:11:09,206 --> 00:11:11,390 Well, there was a mashed potato situation 296 00:11:11,415 --> 00:11:13,626 at the shelter, and... 297 00:11:13,651 --> 00:11:15,306 Heavenly Father, 298 00:11:15,331 --> 00:11:17,415 thank you for these gifts you've given us and 299 00:11:17,440 --> 00:11:19,189 this wonderful meal prepared for us 300 00:11:19,214 --> 00:11:22,446 by my loving and kind and generous... 301 00:11:22,471 --> 00:11:24,431 - Sean. - No, it's all true, honey. 302 00:11:24,456 --> 00:11:25,516 I love you. 303 00:11:25,541 --> 00:11:26,954 Amen. Let's eat. 304 00:11:26,979 --> 00:11:28,979 Uh, Rachel and I 305 00:11:29,004 --> 00:11:31,853 would like to thank you for inviting us into your home. 306 00:11:31,878 --> 00:11:34,554 Last year at this time, I was incarcerated. 307 00:11:34,579 --> 00:11:37,572 So we really, really appreciate it. 308 00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:38,837 We're thrilled to have you. 309 00:11:38,862 --> 00:11:40,992 Wouldn't be a Moody Christmas without you. 310 00:11:41,017 --> 00:11:42,734 - SEAN JR.: Hear, hear! - SEAN SR.: That's right. 311 00:11:42,758 --> 00:11:44,165 - Let's eat. - SEAN JR.: Yes. 312 00:11:44,190 --> 00:11:47,228 Before we eat, I... I'd like to say something, too. 313 00:11:47,253 --> 00:11:49,244 - What is this, a wedding? - Yeah, I'm really hungry. 314 00:11:49,268 --> 00:11:51,770 - Let your brother talk. - I know I ruined caroling 315 00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:53,711 and, uh, a few other things. 316 00:11:53,736 --> 00:11:55,903 I've been caught up in my own stuff, but... 317 00:11:56,215 --> 00:11:57,637 it's all over now. It's behind me. 318 00:11:57,662 --> 00:11:59,232 Could've said that while we were eating. 319 00:11:59,256 --> 00:12:02,019 I'm just really, really grateful to be with you guys. 320 00:12:02,044 --> 00:12:03,577 - Aw. - ANN: Aw! 321 00:12:03,602 --> 00:12:04,622 To family. 322 00:12:04,647 --> 00:12:07,467 ALL: To family! 323 00:12:07,492 --> 00:12:08,815 [DOORBELL RINGS] 324 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:10,504 - Huh. - Seriously? 325 00:12:10,529 --> 00:12:12,645 No, I didn't... I didn't invite anybody else. 326 00:12:12,670 --> 00:12:13,637 But you know Big Stan... 327 00:12:13,662 --> 00:12:16,182 Sometimes he hears what he wants to hear. 328 00:12:16,207 --> 00:12:17,412 - Hey. I'm sorry to... - Hi, Marco. 329 00:12:17,436 --> 00:12:19,121 - ... sorry to interrupt. - Is everything okay? 330 00:12:19,145 --> 00:12:20,643 No. [EXHALES] 331 00:12:20,668 --> 00:12:22,518 - No, it's not. - SEAN SR.: What's wrong? 332 00:12:22,543 --> 00:12:25,598 It's not. Hey, recognize this, Daniel? 333 00:12:25,623 --> 00:12:27,434 - Oh, God. - What? What's going on? 334 00:12:27,459 --> 00:12:29,388 Oh, he didn't tell you guys? He didn't tell you guys? 335 00:12:29,412 --> 00:12:31,158 Go ahead, Dan. Fill everybody in, man. Go ahead. 336 00:12:31,182 --> 00:12:32,778 Marco, can we not do this here? 337 00:12:32,803 --> 00:12:34,184 - He made a play for Cora. - What? 338 00:12:34,209 --> 00:12:36,700 Really? Your cousin's girlfriend? 339 00:12:36,725 --> 00:12:39,559 You coveted, man. You coveted. 340 00:12:39,584 --> 00:12:41,528 You're my best friend and you betrayed me. 341 00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:43,301 Can-can we talk about this in private? 342 00:12:43,326 --> 00:12:45,723 No. No, we're gonna settle this outside. 343 00:12:45,748 --> 00:12:47,379 No, no, no, no, no. No, nobody's fighting. 344 00:12:47,403 --> 00:12:49,856 I need this, Uncle Sean. I need this. 345 00:12:50,961 --> 00:12:52,302 - ALL: Oh! - MARCO: Stepped out... You stepped out! 346 00:12:52,326 --> 00:12:54,051 That's my point. NCAA rules. 347 00:12:54,076 --> 00:12:55,893 - I'm sorry. - That's not enough, man. 348 00:12:55,918 --> 00:12:57,558 - That's not enough. - She chose you, man. 349 00:12:57,582 --> 00:12:58,831 You already won. 350 00:12:58,856 --> 00:13:01,254 - [GRUNTING] - BRIDGET: Oh, no. 351 00:13:01,279 --> 00:13:03,050 Your hands are ice-cold, man. I bet you wish 352 00:13:03,075 --> 00:13:04,671 you had your mittens now, don't you? 353 00:13:04,696 --> 00:13:06,661 - [GRUNTING] - SEAN SR.: Surprise move. 354 00:13:06,686 --> 00:13:09,057 Why do you smell so good, man? 355 00:13:09,082 --> 00:13:10,444 ALL: Ooh! 356 00:13:10,469 --> 00:13:12,723 - And Malbec's down. - He was always a little weak 357 00:13:12,748 --> 00:13:13,834 - to the left. - I know. 358 00:13:13,859 --> 00:13:16,395 Three! Let's go! That's a pin! 359 00:13:20,990 --> 00:13:23,268 You let me pin you just now, didn't you? 360 00:13:23,293 --> 00:13:25,892 So that "W" has an asterisk on it. Wow. 361 00:13:26,176 --> 00:13:28,462 Wow, that is very uncool, man. 362 00:13:28,497 --> 00:13:30,715 I can't even look at you right now. 363 00:13:30,899 --> 00:13:32,934 Marco, I'm sorry. You're my friend. 364 00:13:35,262 --> 00:13:37,581 Things that are shattered 365 00:13:37,606 --> 00:13:40,941 cannot then be unshattered again, Daniel. 366 00:13:41,551 --> 00:13:43,477 Remember that, man. 367 00:13:43,809 --> 00:13:45,426 Remember that. 368 00:13:49,192 --> 00:13:52,635 You know, when I found out, uh, two days before everyone else, 369 00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:55,776 I was somehow both an emotional roller coaster 370 00:13:55,801 --> 00:13:57,638 - and on an emotional roller coaster. - Mm-hmm. Sean, 371 00:13:57,662 --> 00:14:01,394 it's stage 1. He has a 91% survival rate. 372 00:14:01,419 --> 00:14:03,052 He's gonna be totally fine. 373 00:14:03,348 --> 00:14:04,926 Can I have my mass brownie, please? 374 00:14:04,951 --> 00:14:07,121 Oh, indeed. Just, uh, be very careful. 375 00:14:07,146 --> 00:14:08,965 I made them extra potent this year. 376 00:14:08,990 --> 00:14:11,924 - Ooh. - So you might get really sad. 377 00:14:13,187 --> 00:14:15,929 - Hey! - Hey! 378 00:14:15,954 --> 00:14:17,808 - Yes, yes. There he is. - Okay. 379 00:14:17,833 --> 00:14:20,394 I cannot put this day behind me fast enough. 380 00:14:20,419 --> 00:14:22,582 Mittens. Let's just start there. 381 00:14:22,607 --> 00:14:24,874 Mittens. I find it delightful 382 00:14:24,899 --> 00:14:27,465 that you were done in by a hipster clue. 383 00:14:27,490 --> 00:14:29,246 Uh, would you care 384 00:14:29,271 --> 00:14:32,572 - for a mass brownie there, cool guy? - Please, yes. 385 00:14:33,027 --> 00:14:35,347 [JAMAICAN ACCENT]: Partake of them sacrament. 386 00:14:35,372 --> 00:14:38,668 In the name of Bob Marley and Ziggy Marley. 387 00:14:38,693 --> 00:14:40,644 - Just give it to me. - Beenie Man! 388 00:14:40,669 --> 00:14:43,890 - Stop. - Father eedijat. Blop! 389 00:14:43,915 --> 00:14:45,980 Uh, ar-are you sure that, uh, 390 00:14:46,005 --> 00:14:47,722 we can't do the dishes for you? 391 00:14:47,747 --> 00:14:50,285 Oh, no. Thank you. 392 00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:53,344 I-I actually find it therapeutic. 393 00:14:53,490 --> 00:14:55,254 Well, at least let us 394 00:14:55,279 --> 00:14:57,238 take out the trash on our way out. 395 00:14:57,263 --> 00:14:58,933 Oh, yeah, all right. Thank you. 396 00:14:58,958 --> 00:15:01,746 Uh, through the mud room, behind the garage. 397 00:15:01,771 --> 00:15:03,512 - Thank you. - Listen, 398 00:15:03,537 --> 00:15:04,942 I get the feeling that you didn't have 399 00:15:04,966 --> 00:15:06,546 the evening that you wanted. 400 00:15:06,571 --> 00:15:08,207 - Oh... - And, um, I just want to say, 401 00:15:08,232 --> 00:15:10,371 from where I'm sitting, uh, 402 00:15:10,396 --> 00:15:12,832 you've got a great thing going. 403 00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:15,013 My husband tell you to say that? 404 00:15:15,338 --> 00:15:17,754 - I put it in my own words. - Yeah. 405 00:15:17,957 --> 00:15:20,019 - Thank you. - Okay. 406 00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:23,653 Come and behold him 407 00:15:23,678 --> 00:15:26,610 Born the king of angels 408 00:15:26,635 --> 00:15:30,036 Oh, come let us adore him 409 00:15:30,061 --> 00:15:33,691 Oh, come let us adore him 410 00:15:33,716 --> 00:15:37,618 Oh, come let us adore him 411 00:15:37,643 --> 00:15:41,448 Christ, the Lord 412 00:15:41,777 --> 00:15:42,777 [WHISPERING]: Go ahead. 413 00:15:42,802 --> 00:15:44,558 - Hurry up. - Okay. 414 00:15:47,399 --> 00:15:48,865 [WHISPERS]: Sit! 415 00:15:53,732 --> 00:15:56,472 This is a reading from the Book of... 416 00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:58,644 Ecclesiastes. 417 00:15:59,348 --> 00:16:00,647 [MOUTHS] 418 00:16:03,073 --> 00:16:04,906 "Cast your bread upon the waters, 419 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:07,402 "for you will find it after many days. 420 00:16:07,427 --> 00:16:10,885 "Give a portion to seven, and, yes, also to eight, 421 00:16:10,910 --> 00:16:13,722 "for you know not what evil might happen upon the Earth. 422 00:16:13,747 --> 00:16:16,285 "If the clouds are full of rain, 423 00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:19,222 "then he who observes the clouds will not reap. 424 00:16:19,247 --> 00:16:21,793 "As you do not know the way of the wind, 425 00:16:21,818 --> 00:16:24,176 "you do not know the work of God. 426 00:16:24,201 --> 00:16:26,152 "And that... 427 00:16:26,432 --> 00:16:29,097 is the gord of the Lord." 428 00:16:29,122 --> 00:16:30,902 [STIFLED LAUGHING] 429 00:16:30,927 --> 00:16:32,793 - Stop it. - [CLEARS THROAT] 430 00:16:32,818 --> 00:16:33,983 Stop it. 431 00:16:34,008 --> 00:16:36,121 - Stop it. - Amen. 432 00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:38,372 SEAN JR.: [WHISPERS]: The gord of the Lord. 433 00:16:38,396 --> 00:16:39,809 - [DAN AND SEAN JR. LAUGHING] - ANN: Stop it. 434 00:16:39,833 --> 00:16:42,722 And when I was in seventh grade I went to UN Camp, 435 00:16:42,747 --> 00:16:45,355 and I got so homesick 436 00:16:45,380 --> 00:16:47,613 that I pretended I had Lyme disease. 437 00:16:47,638 --> 00:16:49,671 [LAUGHING] 438 00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:53,211 I looked up the symptoms and everything, um... 439 00:16:53,889 --> 00:16:57,048 And I called my dad to come get me. [SNIFFS] 440 00:16:57,401 --> 00:16:59,720 And he drove five hours 441 00:16:59,745 --> 00:17:01,204 in the middle of the night. 442 00:17:02,316 --> 00:17:05,142 Took me to a diner and we got pancakes. 443 00:17:05,836 --> 00:17:08,751 I mean, he knew I was faking, and he didn't say anything. 444 00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:13,673 And after breakfast, he said, 445 00:17:13,698 --> 00:17:15,650 "Okay, are you ready to go back?" 446 00:17:15,999 --> 00:17:17,907 And I said, "Yeah." 447 00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:23,634 If he's not around... 448 00:17:24,908 --> 00:17:26,415 who do I call? 449 00:17:30,837 --> 00:17:33,525 I really want to recommend a cleanse 450 00:17:33,550 --> 00:17:36,009 to help combat the side effects of the chemo, 451 00:17:36,034 --> 00:17:38,681 - but I know that's... - [CHUCKLES] 452 00:17:38,706 --> 00:17:40,839 not what you need right now. 453 00:17:42,564 --> 00:17:44,290 I'm not very good at this. 454 00:17:44,415 --> 00:17:46,337 You actually are. 455 00:17:56,354 --> 00:17:58,065 - "And lo, the angel of the Lord - [SEAN JR. AND DAN GIGGLING] 456 00:17:58,089 --> 00:17:59,580 - "came upon them, - People are looking. 457 00:17:59,604 --> 00:18:01,720 "and the glory shone around them: 458 00:18:01,745 --> 00:18:05,298 "And the angel said unto them, fear not: for, behold, 459 00:18:05,323 --> 00:18:07,080 - "I bring you good tidings..." - Are you kidding me? 460 00:18:07,104 --> 00:18:09,915 - Are you kidding me? - No, he almost made it. Just... 461 00:18:09,940 --> 00:18:11,876 - ANN: People... - "For unto you is born this day 462 00:18:11,901 --> 00:18:13,736 "in the city of David a Saviour, 463 00:18:13,761 --> 00:18:16,142 - "who is Christ the Lord. - Get out. Get out. Get out. 464 00:18:16,167 --> 00:18:17,587 " ... shall be a sign unto you; 465 00:18:17,612 --> 00:18:20,290 "You shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, 466 00:18:20,315 --> 00:18:21,892 "lying in a manger. 467 00:18:21,917 --> 00:18:24,111 - "And suddenly there was with the angel - [CACKLING LOUDLY] 468 00:18:24,135 --> 00:18:25,493 "a multitude of the heavenly host 469 00:18:25,518 --> 00:18:26,744 - [CACKLING CONTINUES] - "praising God, and saying, 470 00:18:26,768 --> 00:18:29,181 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth..." 471 00:18:33,944 --> 00:18:35,595 Oh, God. 472 00:18:37,172 --> 00:18:40,298 - [SIGHS] - Dashing through the snow 473 00:18:41,525 --> 00:18:43,923 That's a pretty big glass, hon. 474 00:18:43,948 --> 00:18:45,275 Yeah, not big enough. 475 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,392 - Uh, hey, guys? - SEAN JR.: What? 476 00:18:49,417 --> 00:18:50,850 You might want to come in here. 477 00:18:50,875 --> 00:18:52,845 SEAN JR.: What the hell? 478 00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:55,048 Where-where are the Christmas presents? 479 00:18:55,073 --> 00:18:57,073 Okay, what, is this some kind of joke? 480 00:18:57,235 --> 00:18:58,714 Wait, do you think it has anything to do 481 00:18:58,738 --> 00:19:00,470 with the people from the shelter? 482 00:19:00,495 --> 00:19:03,236 Oh, you mean the felons that your dad invited to dinner. 483 00:19:03,261 --> 00:19:05,762 Okay, let's not jump to conclusions, guys. 484 00:19:05,787 --> 00:19:07,743 - They stole them. - Um... 485 00:19:07,768 --> 00:19:09,837 They stole them when they took the trash out, 486 00:19:09,862 --> 00:19:11,798 they left the side door unlocked. 487 00:19:11,823 --> 00:19:14,376 They turned the dancing Santa on just to mock us. 488 00:19:14,401 --> 00:19:16,431 Oh. Kind of a cool move. 489 00:19:16,456 --> 00:19:18,556 Okay, I just want to remind all of us, okay, 490 00:19:18,581 --> 00:19:20,299 that the spirit of Christmas is not about... 491 00:19:20,323 --> 00:19:23,478 Be quiet, okay? I ask for so little. 492 00:19:23,503 --> 00:19:26,548 All I wanted was my own bathroom and a white Christmas. 493 00:19:26,573 --> 00:19:29,322 And, you know, that weather gal is so full of crap. 494 00:19:29,347 --> 00:19:30,784 Guys, it's not the end of the world. 495 00:19:30,808 --> 00:19:32,650 - It's just presents, right? - ALL: Yeah. 496 00:19:32,675 --> 00:19:34,868 And Mom got us all down vests, 497 00:19:34,893 --> 00:19:38,628 wh-which were very practical and very thoughtful, Mom. 498 00:19:38,653 --> 00:19:39,915 You know, you're right. 499 00:19:39,940 --> 00:19:42,274 I mean, why even give presents? 500 00:19:42,490 --> 00:19:44,908 You know, why even have Christmas at all? 501 00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:46,800 And if nobody cares about the traditions 502 00:19:46,825 --> 00:19:49,445 in this family, then I don't either. 503 00:19:49,470 --> 00:19:50,688 - BRIDGET: Mom. - No. 504 00:19:50,712 --> 00:19:52,002 - It's not that. No, it's, it's... - Hon. 505 00:19:52,026 --> 00:19:53,923 Hey, look... Okay? Okay, let's not go crazy. 506 00:19:53,948 --> 00:19:56,212 We still have, uh, we still have Bridget's presents. 507 00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:57,665 - Right. - And she never puts them 508 00:19:57,690 --> 00:19:58,796 - out till Christmas morning. - Right. Honey. 509 00:19:58,820 --> 00:20:00,627 - Not this year. Not this year. - SEAN JR.: What? 510 00:20:00,651 --> 00:20:01,829 What the hell? Why? 511 00:20:01,854 --> 00:20:03,665 What about the ones on my list? 512 00:20:03,690 --> 00:20:05,392 Specifically, the expensive headphones. 513 00:20:05,417 --> 00:20:08,097 - Did you-did you put-put those out? - I only put them out Christmas morning, 514 00:20:08,121 --> 00:20:09,464 because that's when Doug and I come over, 515 00:20:09,488 --> 00:20:10,558 but since I was already here... 516 00:20:10,582 --> 00:20:12,299 - Why did you cheat on Doug?! - Okay. 517 00:20:12,324 --> 00:20:13,936 Could we not make this about that, please? 518 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:16,268 - [SHOT] - Holy Moses! 519 00:20:16,293 --> 00:20:19,102 - I just wanted to have... - [ALL EXCLAIMING] 520 00:20:19,127 --> 00:20:20,932 a nice Christmas, 521 00:20:20,957 --> 00:20:22,885 - and you all ruined it. - Mom! 522 00:20:22,918 --> 00:20:24,604 - Honey. Honey... - I'm done! 523 00:20:25,494 --> 00:20:27,252 I'm out! 524 00:20:27,455 --> 00:20:29,854 Christmas is canceled. 525 00:20:30,719 --> 00:20:32,652 [WHIMPERS] 526 00:20:40,691 --> 00:20:42,124 Hon... 527 00:20:43,902 --> 00:20:45,565 Hey, guys, look. 528 00:20:47,255 --> 00:20:48,706 It's starting to snow. 529 00:20:48,731 --> 00:20:50,380 Oh, it is, too. 530 00:20:50,405 --> 00:20:52,073 O holy night 531 00:20:52,098 --> 00:20:55,096 The stars are brightly shining 532 00:20:55,121 --> 00:20:56,767 - SEAN SR.: Oh, wow. - BRIDGET: Should we tell Mom 533 00:20:56,791 --> 00:20:58,767 that we're gonna have a white Christmas? 534 00:20:58,792 --> 00:21:02,213 Uh... No, I think we should give her some time. 535 00:21:02,238 --> 00:21:03,238 Fair. 536 00:21:03,593 --> 00:21:06,609 Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie www.addic7ed.com 39428

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