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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 Translated By The Community Of WWW.MY-SUBS.COM 1 00:00:07,109 --> 00:00:10,014 Damn. What you got going on today, girl? 2 00:00:10,039 --> 00:00:11,982 Oh, nothing. I'm just, uh... you know, 3 00:00:12,007 --> 00:00:14,116 - working in the studio. - Well, I'd like to stay 4 00:00:14,141 --> 00:00:16,076 and get to know you better, but I got to get to work. 5 00:00:16,102 --> 00:00:18,459 Get out of here, perv. That's for Montana. 6 00:00:18,484 --> 00:00:19,843 - Oh. - She's just here 7 00:00:19,868 --> 00:00:21,453 going through some of my old paintings 8 00:00:21,478 --> 00:00:24,423 to see if anything's worth including in my next show. 9 00:00:24,571 --> 00:00:26,717 You know, not every boss 10 00:00:26,742 --> 00:00:29,030 wants to sleep with their assistant. 11 00:00:29,574 --> 00:00:32,596 Besides, she's straight. I tried. 12 00:00:32,621 --> 00:00:34,624 Sure you're not still trying? 13 00:00:35,374 --> 00:00:37,975 Montana, this is my roommate Liza. 14 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,139 Oh, hi. So nice to meet you. 15 00:00:40,164 --> 00:00:42,460 It's nice to meet you too, Montana. 16 00:00:43,229 --> 00:00:45,296 - Bye. - Bye. 17 00:00:45,321 --> 00:00:47,053 Why don't you sit down, take a break. 18 00:00:47,093 --> 00:00:49,109 I made us some delicious avocado toast. 19 00:00:49,134 --> 00:00:50,468 Oh, thank you, 20 00:00:50,493 --> 00:00:52,756 - but I'm actually gluten free. - Oh. 21 00:00:52,781 --> 00:00:54,678 Of course you are. 22 00:00:57,525 --> 00:01:03,272 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.MY-SUBS.com - 23 00:01:04,847 --> 00:01:07,151 Marketing research I did on influencers. 24 00:01:07,176 --> 00:01:10,486 I'm not sure that's going to come up today, but thank you. 25 00:01:10,511 --> 00:01:13,436 Morning, everyone. I'd like to jump right in, if we could. 26 00:01:13,461 --> 00:01:15,690 Oh, I have some news. But it can wait. 27 00:01:15,715 --> 00:01:18,165 Invitations went out for Bonfire, 28 00:01:18,190 --> 00:01:19,767 the top-secret Achilles retreat 29 00:01:19,792 --> 00:01:21,245 for leaders in publishing. 30 00:01:21,270 --> 00:01:24,877 Regrettably, Empirical did not get invited. 31 00:01:25,870 --> 00:01:27,332 But... 32 00:01:27,663 --> 00:01:28,845 Millennial did. 33 00:01:28,869 --> 00:01:30,790 Oh, my God. Are you serious? 34 00:01:30,815 --> 00:01:31,776 - What? - See for yourself. 35 00:01:31,801 --> 00:01:33,743 Oh, my God. 36 00:01:33,768 --> 00:01:35,104 This is huge. 37 00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:37,508 Rod Stewart sat next to me at Sushi Nakazawa last night. 38 00:01:37,533 --> 00:01:38,620 What does it mean? 39 00:01:38,645 --> 00:01:40,282 I assume it means he lives in the Village. 40 00:01:40,307 --> 00:01:41,529 No, I mean, is this something 41 00:01:41,554 --> 00:01:42,752 that we need to prepare for? 42 00:01:42,777 --> 00:01:44,136 You have been asked to be 43 00:01:44,161 --> 00:01:46,224 on the "Future of Publishing" panel, 44 00:01:46,249 --> 00:01:48,134 so prepare some thoughts for that. 45 00:01:48,159 --> 00:01:50,898 Otherwise, have a good time. 46 00:01:54,088 --> 00:01:56,626 Moving on. Congratulations. 47 00:01:59,643 --> 00:02:01,370 Kelsey, Diana. 48 00:02:01,395 --> 00:02:03,432 Can I see you both in my office? 49 00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:05,520 - Is something wrong? - It's about Liza. 50 00:02:10,123 --> 00:02:11,307 What do you two think 51 00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:13,127 about giving Liza a promotion? 52 00:02:14,151 --> 00:02:16,054 What would that look like for me? 53 00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:18,161 I don't plan on 54 00:02:18,186 --> 00:02:20,432 leaving you without an assistant, but... 55 00:02:20,457 --> 00:02:23,331 I think she could handle 56 00:02:23,356 --> 00:02:25,459 more responsibility with Millennial. 57 00:02:25,484 --> 00:02:30,147 Actually, I think that Millennial could use someone a step above Liza. 58 00:02:30,172 --> 00:02:33,112 We are... growing really fast. 59 00:02:34,931 --> 00:02:36,548 Well, in my opinion, 60 00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:38,830 Liza is up to the task... 61 00:02:39,319 --> 00:02:42,424 but I'm open to exploring other options. 62 00:02:47,863 --> 00:02:49,245 Make a reservation. 63 00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:50,760 We need to have lunch. 64 00:02:54,330 --> 00:02:57,428 - Thank you. - That's enough for her. 65 00:02:58,904 --> 00:03:00,366 This is nice. 66 00:03:00,391 --> 00:03:02,751 What's the occasion? 67 00:03:02,775 --> 00:03:03,674 Liza, we have a heavy afternoon, 68 00:03:03,714 --> 00:03:04,589 so I'll cut to the chase. 69 00:03:04,614 --> 00:03:06,314 I know that Kelsey stole your boyfriend. 70 00:03:06,339 --> 00:03:07,740 She absolutely did not. 71 00:03:07,765 --> 00:03:09,657 But she's living with him. 72 00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,312 Yes, they are roommates. 73 00:03:11,372 --> 00:03:13,876 But Kelsey hasn't done anything wrong. 74 00:03:13,901 --> 00:03:16,488 Then... you must have. 75 00:03:16,982 --> 00:03:19,347 Whatever, it doesn't matter. Just fix it. 76 00:03:19,372 --> 00:03:21,785 Kelsey is in a position now to make decisions, 77 00:03:21,810 --> 00:03:23,914 and I would hate to see you let personal drama 78 00:03:23,939 --> 00:03:27,059 get in the way of... a promising career. 79 00:03:27,084 --> 00:03:29,209 Of course. You're right. 80 00:03:29,999 --> 00:03:33,255 If you care to talk about it, I'm a pretty good listener. 81 00:03:33,792 --> 00:03:37,301 Well, the truth is... 82 00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,418 the reason Josh and I ended 83 00:03:39,443 --> 00:03:41,031 had absolutely nothing to do with Kelsey... 84 00:03:41,056 --> 00:03:42,348 Shh! Richard's ex-wife just walked in. 85 00:03:42,373 --> 00:03:43,785 - What? - Don't, don't... 86 00:03:43,810 --> 00:03:45,935 How do you know? 87 00:03:46,349 --> 00:03:48,882 Because I Facebook stalk her. Is that what you want to hear? 88 00:03:48,907 --> 00:03:50,209 Her name is Winnie. 89 00:03:50,286 --> 00:03:52,551 She also happens to be a therapist. 90 00:03:52,821 --> 00:03:55,067 Her best friend Cindy lives in Nyack. 91 00:03:55,092 --> 00:03:56,855 Uh... well, we can leave if you... 92 00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:59,390 Don't be ridiculous. We are not in high school. 93 00:03:59,415 --> 00:04:00,848 Hi. 94 00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,333 Thank you. 95 00:04:03,316 --> 00:04:04,706 Should I introduce myself to her? 96 00:04:04,731 --> 00:04:05,723 No, I don't think so. 97 00:04:05,748 --> 00:04:07,831 - I feel like I know her. - You don't. 98 00:04:09,099 --> 00:04:12,086 - Diana. - No, I'm fine. 99 00:04:14,418 --> 00:04:16,081 Hello, Winnie? 100 00:04:16,181 --> 00:04:18,699 - I'm Diana Trout. - I'm sorry, do I know you? 101 00:04:18,724 --> 00:04:20,988 No, no, but we have a... 102 00:04:21,088 --> 00:04:24,153 mutual acquaintance. Richard Caldwell? 103 00:04:24,253 --> 00:04:26,517 How do you know Richard? 104 00:04:27,444 --> 00:04:29,066 We're dating. 105 00:04:29,091 --> 00:04:31,094 You're Richard's new girlfriend? 106 00:04:39,935 --> 00:04:42,762 I'm sorry... I'm sorry, you seem very nice. 107 00:04:45,491 --> 00:04:47,856 Hi. We'll take these to go. 108 00:04:53,551 --> 00:04:54,908 - Hey. - Hey. 109 00:04:54,933 --> 00:04:57,517 I found a bunch of stats on publishing trends. 110 00:04:57,542 --> 00:04:58,973 "Wall Street Journal" did an article. 111 00:04:58,998 --> 00:05:00,303 So did "Publisher's Weekly." 112 00:05:00,328 --> 00:05:02,022 I thought those might be useful for the panel. 113 00:05:02,047 --> 00:05:04,326 Yeah, what I really need is for you 114 00:05:04,351 --> 00:05:07,335 to book a rental car from the Burlington airport. 115 00:05:07,449 --> 00:05:09,692 I'll send you a PDF of my driver's license... 116 00:05:09,717 --> 00:05:11,498 I'm assuming you don't want to be in the system. 117 00:05:11,523 --> 00:05:13,269 No, it's okay. I figured out 118 00:05:13,294 --> 00:05:15,774 all the ID tricks a while ago. 119 00:05:16,358 --> 00:05:17,740 Of course you did. 120 00:05:28,442 --> 00:05:30,935 - Hey, you sick of me already? - Uh-huh. 121 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:32,383 No. 122 00:05:32,408 --> 00:05:34,311 - I got invited to Bonfire. - Oh? 123 00:05:34,336 --> 00:05:35,879 ¿Qué es Bonfire? 124 00:05:35,904 --> 00:05:37,406 That internet company, Achilles, 125 00:05:37,431 --> 00:05:39,460 sponsors this invite-only conference 126 00:05:39,485 --> 00:05:40,952 for people in publishing to network. 127 00:05:40,977 --> 00:05:42,314 Mm-hmm. Sounds like an excuse 128 00:05:42,339 --> 00:05:44,803 - to hook up. - Oh, yeah, that too. 129 00:05:44,828 --> 00:05:46,321 I need to go on a little retreat. 130 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,369 I'm telling ya... 131 00:05:48,573 --> 00:05:52,047 Mm. Hello, beautiful strangers. 132 00:05:52,072 --> 00:05:53,837 - Tinder? - What? 133 00:05:53,862 --> 00:05:56,471 Do you have a better suggestion here? 134 00:05:56,496 --> 00:05:57,461 - No. - All right. 135 00:05:57,486 --> 00:05:59,109 I fully support you. 136 00:05:59,134 --> 00:06:01,457 Aww, thanks. 137 00:06:20,696 --> 00:06:22,719 Hey, I found some camping gear 138 00:06:22,744 --> 00:06:24,427 that some old girlfriends left behind. 139 00:06:24,452 --> 00:06:26,057 I thought you could use it for your adventure in the woods. 140 00:06:26,081 --> 00:06:27,448 Uh, thanks, but I think this is going 141 00:06:27,473 --> 00:06:29,625 to be more like "glamping" than camping. 142 00:06:29,650 --> 00:06:30,800 What's this? 143 00:06:31,108 --> 00:06:34,133 Oh, it's a bunch of stuff that Josh left. 144 00:06:34,158 --> 00:06:35,594 I feel like I should get it back to him. 145 00:06:35,634 --> 00:06:36,870 Well, you only take stuff back 146 00:06:36,895 --> 00:06:38,857 if you're looking for an excuse to see him. 147 00:06:39,133 --> 00:06:40,675 Are you? 148 00:06:40,700 --> 00:06:41,943 No. 149 00:06:41,988 --> 00:06:43,332 Well, then it's yours. 150 00:06:43,356 --> 00:06:45,612 You should see my pile. 151 00:06:45,716 --> 00:06:47,686 A hot/cold canteen is a little less valuable 152 00:06:47,711 --> 00:06:49,402 than his vintage leather jacket. 153 00:06:49,427 --> 00:06:51,851 - Not to Gretchen. - Really? This says "Lani." 154 00:06:51,876 --> 00:06:53,878 Lani's someone that Gretchen dated before... 155 00:06:54,186 --> 00:06:55,929 Jeez, I'm a lesbian archive. 156 00:06:55,954 --> 00:06:57,339 Yeah, I don't want this bedroom to turn into 157 00:06:57,364 --> 00:06:58,949 - a Josh museum. - You know what? 158 00:06:58,974 --> 00:07:00,597 I'll get his stuff back to him. 159 00:07:00,622 --> 00:07:02,245 You don't have to be involved. 160 00:07:02,370 --> 00:07:03,551 Done. 161 00:07:03,576 --> 00:07:04,968 Okay. 162 00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:06,855 Thank you. 163 00:07:19,869 --> 00:07:22,453 - Liza Miller and Kelsey Peters. - Wonderful. 164 00:07:22,478 --> 00:07:24,029 We have you both in cabin 12. 165 00:07:24,054 --> 00:07:25,516 Oh, what's the Wi-Fi code? 166 00:07:25,541 --> 00:07:27,965 There's no Wi-Fi in the Achilles Forest. 167 00:07:28,046 --> 00:07:29,789 It's a chance to unplug, 168 00:07:29,814 --> 00:07:31,388 so people can actually talk to each other. 169 00:07:31,417 --> 00:07:33,280 - That's nice. - You're kidding me. 170 00:07:33,305 --> 00:07:36,763 We do have a counselor on-site if you experience withdrawal. 171 00:07:36,788 --> 00:07:39,973 This map will show you how to get to your cabin. 172 00:07:39,998 --> 00:07:41,576 Would you like two keys? 173 00:07:41,601 --> 00:07:42,858 - No. - Definitely. 174 00:07:45,968 --> 00:07:47,822 Can I get another map? 175 00:07:59,267 --> 00:08:03,654 Hello, everyone, and welcome to Bonfire. 176 00:08:03,977 --> 00:08:05,371 Wow, is that Boomer? 177 00:08:05,396 --> 00:08:07,117 He doesn't actually come anymore. 178 00:08:07,142 --> 00:08:08,645 He just beams in. 179 00:08:08,670 --> 00:08:10,476 I'm honored to be in the presence 180 00:08:10,501 --> 00:08:11,914 of some of the greatest minds 181 00:08:11,939 --> 00:08:13,785 in the publishing industry. 182 00:08:13,898 --> 00:08:16,442 I hope you all came here ready to give 183 00:08:16,604 --> 00:08:18,667 and open to receive. 184 00:08:18,791 --> 00:08:21,062 Boomer's a little creepy, am I right? 185 00:08:24,918 --> 00:08:26,428 Said the woman who's talking to herself. 186 00:08:26,452 --> 00:08:28,242 If there's anything you need, 187 00:08:28,267 --> 00:08:30,816 don't hesitate to ask your Boomer Bots. 188 00:08:30,841 --> 00:08:34,223 Panels begin in the morning, so... have fun tonight. 189 00:08:34,285 --> 00:08:36,207 - To you! - To you. 190 00:08:55,540 --> 00:08:57,133 Did you have fun last night? 191 00:08:57,158 --> 00:08:58,664 I did. 192 00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:01,380 Good. We have that panel in a couple of hours. 193 00:09:01,405 --> 00:09:02,827 I know, Liza. 194 00:09:04,934 --> 00:09:06,228 What? 195 00:09:07,485 --> 00:09:09,228 Nothing. 196 00:09:09,703 --> 00:09:13,328 No. What is it, Liza? 197 00:09:13,522 --> 00:09:15,478 Nothing. No big deal. 198 00:09:15,503 --> 00:09:17,604 Yeah. I was out all night. 199 00:09:17,629 --> 00:09:20,392 I slept with a stranger. I drank too much. 200 00:09:20,417 --> 00:09:23,109 I have no problem being honest about who I am. 201 00:09:23,134 --> 00:09:25,830 So go ahead, don't hold back. Say what you were gonna say. 202 00:09:25,938 --> 00:09:27,635 Your tit's out. 203 00:09:38,894 --> 00:09:40,931 - You feeling okay? - Mm-hmm. 204 00:09:40,956 --> 00:09:42,712 Great. 205 00:09:42,808 --> 00:09:44,155 Good morning, and welcome to 206 00:09:44,180 --> 00:09:45,790 "The Future of Publishing" panel. 207 00:09:45,815 --> 00:09:47,689 My first question is for Millennial. 208 00:09:47,714 --> 00:09:50,125 What was your most innovative marketing campaign 209 00:09:50,150 --> 00:09:51,446 of the past year? 210 00:09:51,471 --> 00:09:53,524 Well, we did an Instagram campaign, 211 00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:55,466 with influencers posting "shelfies." 212 00:09:55,491 --> 00:09:57,424 That was quite successful. 213 00:09:57,449 --> 00:09:59,775 - "Shelfies"? - People posting photos 214 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:02,492 of their bookshelves, because they want you to see 215 00:10:02,517 --> 00:10:04,227 - what they're reading. - Or at least pretending to. 216 00:10:05,391 --> 00:10:06,856 Is there a book this year you wish 217 00:10:06,881 --> 00:10:08,398 you'd gotten to publish, but didn't? 218 00:10:08,423 --> 00:10:11,117 Absolutely. Colin McNichol's "The Algonquins" 219 00:10:11,142 --> 00:10:12,461 could've been a huge hit 220 00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:14,271 if they published with Millennial, 221 00:10:14,296 --> 00:10:16,319 but instead, they went with some big, 222 00:10:16,344 --> 00:10:18,880 mainstream publishing house that fumbled the ball. 223 00:10:18,905 --> 00:10:20,445 Perhaps that's why no one 224 00:10:20,470 --> 00:10:22,338 from the aforementioned publishing house 225 00:10:22,363 --> 00:10:23,898 is here at Bonfire. 226 00:10:30,455 --> 00:10:31,733 Oh, excuse me. 227 00:10:31,758 --> 00:10:33,280 Ah... Liza Miller? 228 00:10:33,305 --> 00:10:34,293 - Right? - Uh, yeah. 229 00:10:34,318 --> 00:10:35,624 Hi. Jay Mallick. 230 00:10:35,649 --> 00:10:37,792 I'm with Macmillan. I saw the panel. 231 00:10:37,817 --> 00:10:39,681 Millennial's killing it. 232 00:10:40,031 --> 00:10:42,367 Yeah, Kelsey's doing an amazing job. 233 00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:45,297 Mm-hmm, well... she's not doing it alone. 234 00:10:45,322 --> 00:10:47,370 - Well, it is her baby. - Right. 235 00:10:47,395 --> 00:10:49,538 And that's why I wanted to talk to you. 236 00:10:49,563 --> 00:10:51,967 Look, Macmillan is launching its own Gen-Y imprint, 237 00:10:51,992 --> 00:10:54,578 and we are looking for someone to head it up. 238 00:10:54,603 --> 00:10:58,179 I don't mean to be too forward, but would you be interested? 239 00:10:58,293 --> 00:10:59,624 Me? 240 00:10:59,649 --> 00:11:01,866 Okay, that was entirely too forward. 241 00:11:01,891 --> 00:11:03,794 I'm sorry. Um, let me just back up. 242 00:11:03,819 --> 00:11:06,041 Can I get you a drink? 243 00:11:06,528 --> 00:11:08,624 Sure. A drink sounds 244 00:11:08,649 --> 00:11:10,790 - much more manageable. - Oh, look, there's a bar. 245 00:11:18,299 --> 00:11:20,224 - Hey. - Oh, hey. 246 00:11:20,249 --> 00:11:21,840 - Thanks for coming. - Yeah. 247 00:11:21,865 --> 00:11:22,888 How's it going? All right? 248 00:11:22,913 --> 00:11:24,668 Good. Thanks for bringing my stuff. 249 00:11:24,693 --> 00:11:25,912 Yeah. 250 00:11:26,170 --> 00:11:27,949 - That's not mine, though. - No, no, no. 251 00:11:27,974 --> 00:11:30,466 That's a gift. There's a couple of flares 252 00:11:30,491 --> 00:11:32,842 in there, a pair of women's long johns... 253 00:11:32,867 --> 00:11:35,301 - Canteen? - Yeah, knock yourself out. 254 00:11:35,326 --> 00:11:36,828 - Thanks. - Here you go. 255 00:11:36,853 --> 00:11:37,995 Thank you. 256 00:11:38,020 --> 00:11:39,272 - Hey. - Hey. 257 00:11:39,297 --> 00:11:40,558 Can I get you something? 258 00:11:40,583 --> 00:11:42,378 You get the friends-of-Maggie discount. 259 00:11:42,403 --> 00:11:44,659 Mm. Yeah, I'll take an Americano. 260 00:11:44,684 --> 00:11:47,349 - Okay. - Thanks. 261 00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:48,834 Damn. 262 00:11:49,830 --> 00:11:51,743 I see why you wanted to get coffee here. 263 00:11:51,768 --> 00:11:53,831 Yeah, she works for me part time. 264 00:11:53,856 --> 00:11:55,384 - Really? - Mm-hmm. 265 00:11:55,409 --> 00:11:57,546 - She's hot. - If you like straight girls 266 00:11:57,571 --> 00:11:59,268 with sexy hair. 267 00:11:59,408 --> 00:12:01,477 That's kind of my thing. 268 00:12:01,502 --> 00:12:03,930 I'm sorry how it went down with Liza. 269 00:12:03,955 --> 00:12:05,392 Yeah. 270 00:12:05,727 --> 00:12:08,821 You mean how I caught her cheating on me? 271 00:12:08,846 --> 00:12:10,485 Yeah. She messed up. 272 00:12:10,510 --> 00:12:11,924 But it wasn't that night. 273 00:12:11,949 --> 00:12:13,693 It was the night that she met you at that bar 274 00:12:13,718 --> 00:12:14,893 and thought it was just gonna be fun. 275 00:12:14,918 --> 00:12:17,199 I mean, you were way more than she bargained for. 276 00:12:17,224 --> 00:12:19,573 Well, she definitely taught me a lot... 277 00:12:19,829 --> 00:12:22,774 like if someone tells you they're a liar... 278 00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,626 you should believe them. 279 00:12:24,843 --> 00:12:27,085 Yeah, well, I'm exactly the same age 280 00:12:27,110 --> 00:12:28,657 that I told you that I was, 281 00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:30,410 so I hope we can still be friends. 282 00:12:30,435 --> 00:12:32,535 What are you talking about? You never mentioned anything 283 00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:34,462 - about your age. - Yeah, let's keep it that way. 284 00:12:34,487 --> 00:12:36,757 All right. 285 00:12:38,429 --> 00:12:40,132 Okay, okay... 286 00:12:40,157 --> 00:12:42,609 Jane Austen, Charlotte Bronte, and Virginia Woolf. 287 00:12:42,634 --> 00:12:43,976 Go. 288 00:12:44,001 --> 00:12:45,664 That is tough. All right. 289 00:12:45,697 --> 00:12:47,625 Virginia would not be happy either way, so... 290 00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:48,884 - She's gone. - Mm. 291 00:12:48,909 --> 00:12:51,358 And... I guess I am 292 00:12:51,383 --> 00:12:54,208 gonna marry Charlotte and give it to Jane. 293 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:55,311 - Nice. - Yeah? 294 00:12:55,336 --> 00:12:56,358 - Hey. - Hi. 295 00:12:56,383 --> 00:12:58,796 - Excuse me. - Okay, uh... 296 00:12:59,608 --> 00:13:01,187 You've been talking to that guy for over an hour. 297 00:13:01,212 --> 00:13:02,995 - Move on. - I've talked to other people. 298 00:13:03,020 --> 00:13:05,583 I talked to that independent publisher from Indiana. 299 00:13:05,608 --> 00:13:08,552 - The nun? - Her name's Sister Angela. 300 00:13:08,577 --> 00:13:10,320 She's got a really great story. 301 00:13:10,345 --> 00:13:13,199 We got invited to Bonfire because we're millennials, 302 00:13:13,224 --> 00:13:15,694 and our brand is young and fun. So I'm gonna need you 303 00:13:15,719 --> 00:13:17,727 to be a little more on-brand, okay? 304 00:13:19,164 --> 00:13:21,708 Keep up. 305 00:13:21,985 --> 00:13:23,420 Move. 306 00:13:35,759 --> 00:13:37,812 - You're my 7:00? - Hi. 307 00:13:37,837 --> 00:13:40,220 I just thought since we work in the same neighborhood... 308 00:13:40,245 --> 00:13:42,164 and we have similar tastes in... 309 00:13:42,189 --> 00:13:44,292 - Men? - Restaurants... 310 00:13:44,317 --> 00:13:46,289 we might bump into each other from time to time, 311 00:13:46,314 --> 00:13:49,075 so I wanted to come in and clear the air about something. 312 00:13:49,100 --> 00:13:51,103 I'm listening. 313 00:13:53,580 --> 00:13:55,443 When I told you I was dating Richard, 314 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:56,925 why did you laugh? 315 00:13:57,025 --> 00:13:58,965 You weren't what I was expecting. 316 00:13:59,244 --> 00:14:00,506 How so? 317 00:14:00,531 --> 00:14:01,793 When Richard left me 318 00:14:01,818 --> 00:14:04,110 after 18 years of marriage, 319 00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:06,915 he said he wanted to recapture his youth. 320 00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:09,000 According to him, that meant buying a truck, 321 00:14:09,025 --> 00:14:12,462 which is impractical in the city, and... 322 00:14:12,487 --> 00:14:14,604 dating models. 323 00:14:17,009 --> 00:14:19,859 - Oh. - So you can see why I laughed. 324 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:24,476 Thank you for clearing that up. 325 00:14:24,501 --> 00:14:26,204 That'll be $300. 326 00:14:26,229 --> 00:14:27,851 And I don't take insurance. 327 00:14:33,108 --> 00:14:35,693 Some big, mainstream publishing house 328 00:14:35,718 --> 00:14:37,157 - just fumbled the ball! - Hmm. 329 00:14:37,182 --> 00:14:39,517 - Right, Liza? - Right, mm-hmm. 330 00:14:39,542 --> 00:14:42,263 - Oh! - I'm gonna cut myself off. 331 00:14:42,288 --> 00:14:44,569 I've had four... already. 332 00:14:44,594 --> 00:14:47,046 I'm feeling a little "whoo-whoo." 333 00:14:47,071 --> 00:14:48,614 I've had six. 334 00:14:48,639 --> 00:14:51,804 And he has had six, and Hat... 335 00:14:51,829 --> 00:14:54,796 has had, like, seven or eight. 336 00:14:55,975 --> 00:14:57,420 - Glass, please? - All right, 337 00:14:57,445 --> 00:14:59,748 maybe I just need something to eat. 338 00:14:59,915 --> 00:15:02,027 Okay, maybe not. 339 00:15:02,567 --> 00:15:05,018 As I was saying... 340 00:15:05,043 --> 00:15:06,311 Some big, mainstream company fumbled it! 341 00:15:06,336 --> 00:15:07,843 Ah... 342 00:15:09,046 --> 00:15:11,139 Uh... hey. 343 00:15:11,164 --> 00:15:13,482 Hey. Where's your glass? 344 00:15:13,507 --> 00:15:15,473 - I'm done. - What... we're having 345 00:15:15,498 --> 00:15:16,951 - a great time. - I barfed, Kelsey. 346 00:15:16,976 --> 00:15:20,584 - Well, boot and rally. - No, boot and go home. 347 00:15:24,108 --> 00:15:26,890 What is the problem, Liza? Isn't this part of the fun? 348 00:15:26,915 --> 00:15:28,083 You get to relive your glory years. 349 00:15:28,108 --> 00:15:30,652 You get to pretend to be 27 again. 350 00:15:30,677 --> 00:15:33,145 When I was 27, I was married with a kid. 351 00:15:33,170 --> 00:15:34,601 I was boring. 352 00:15:34,626 --> 00:15:37,937 This is the drunkest I've been in my entire life. 353 00:15:37,962 --> 00:15:39,745 I love my job, 354 00:15:39,782 --> 00:15:43,459 and I think I'm pretty good at it. 355 00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:46,029 And if that isn't good enough for you, 356 00:15:46,054 --> 00:15:47,765 then maybe this isn't working. 357 00:15:47,790 --> 00:15:49,252 Maybe it's not. 358 00:15:55,218 --> 00:15:58,083 You can't... that's crazy, right? 359 00:15:58,108 --> 00:15:59,510 - You get... - I'm interested. 360 00:16:03,811 --> 00:16:05,308 I'll call you. 361 00:16:05,379 --> 00:16:08,134 Oh, my God, there's barf in here. 362 00:16:15,277 --> 00:16:16,980 Hey. 363 00:16:17,222 --> 00:16:20,033 Can, uh... can I still get a drink, or... 364 00:16:20,058 --> 00:16:22,362 We close in two minutes, so can you drink fast? 365 00:16:22,387 --> 00:16:24,127 Well, is there any other place around here 366 00:16:24,152 --> 00:16:26,843 that stays open any later? 367 00:16:26,868 --> 00:16:28,564 Yeah, I'm sure there are a lot... 368 00:16:28,589 --> 00:16:30,212 Lot of places. 369 00:16:30,237 --> 00:16:31,419 Yeah. 370 00:16:31,444 --> 00:16:34,619 Will you be at any of them? 371 00:16:45,693 --> 00:16:47,425 We can, uh... 372 00:16:47,450 --> 00:16:49,816 - we can skip the tour, right? - Yeah. 373 00:17:08,525 --> 00:17:11,073 I almost finished an entire "New Yorker" article 374 00:17:11,098 --> 00:17:12,886 while you were in there. 375 00:17:12,911 --> 00:17:14,993 Is everything okay? 376 00:17:15,487 --> 00:17:17,490 I met your ex-wife. 377 00:17:18,659 --> 00:17:20,041 Winnie? 378 00:17:20,066 --> 00:17:21,889 Is there more than one, Richard? 379 00:17:21,914 --> 00:17:23,917 No, uh... 380 00:17:25,362 --> 00:17:28,579 - What happened? - I introduced myself, 381 00:17:28,604 --> 00:17:32,185 and she proceeded to laugh in my face. 382 00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:33,987 Ah, well, she was probably 383 00:17:34,012 --> 00:17:35,950 just flight-testing some new meds. 384 00:17:36,050 --> 00:17:38,114 She said it was because when you left, 385 00:17:38,139 --> 00:17:41,102 you did so to pursue the fantasy of dating... 386 00:17:42,142 --> 00:17:44,245 models. 387 00:17:44,282 --> 00:17:46,396 I said a lot of ridiculous things 388 00:17:46,421 --> 00:17:48,424 when I left her. 389 00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:52,075 But then again, 390 00:17:52,188 --> 00:17:54,469 I did end up meeting someone beautiful... 391 00:17:56,730 --> 00:17:58,673 Inside and out. 392 00:17:58,698 --> 00:18:00,204 I only care about out. 393 00:18:22,451 --> 00:18:24,515 If I didn't know your real age already, 394 00:18:24,684 --> 00:18:26,587 I would today. 395 00:18:26,687 --> 00:18:28,104 I don't feel like talking. 396 00:18:45,199 --> 00:18:47,819 Ah! My God, we finally have service. 397 00:18:58,516 --> 00:19:00,336 What's going on? 398 00:19:00,805 --> 00:19:02,703 - I'm sorry, it's my daughter... - _ 399 00:19:02,728 --> 00:19:04,555 _ 400 00:19:04,580 --> 00:19:06,905 _ 401 00:19:06,930 --> 00:19:10,916 - What? - She's in the hospital. 402 00:19:13,350 --> 00:19:15,453 Come on, answer, answer. 403 00:19:15,647 --> 00:19:17,550 It's Caitlin... holla at your girl. 404 00:19:17,575 --> 00:19:20,201 Caitlin, it's your mom. I'm on my way, okay? 405 00:19:20,371 --> 00:19:22,995 - Hey, what's going on? - I think her appendix burst. 406 00:19:23,020 --> 00:19:24,763 Oh, my God. 407 00:19:31,934 --> 00:19:34,231 - Here. - Hey. 408 00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,883 I just spoke to Rose, Caitlin's roommate. 409 00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:37,567 - She's out of surgery. - Is she okay? 410 00:19:37,592 --> 00:19:38,934 I don't know. 411 00:19:38,974 --> 00:19:40,333 I think so. She's gonna call me 412 00:19:40,358 --> 00:19:42,747 - when she wakes up. - So what happened? 413 00:19:42,772 --> 00:19:44,514 Well, apparently, 414 00:19:44,539 --> 00:19:46,582 she didn't go to the doctor when she first started 415 00:19:46,607 --> 00:19:48,130 having pain, because she was afraid 416 00:19:48,155 --> 00:19:50,338 she wouldn't have enough money for the deductible. 417 00:19:50,403 --> 00:19:53,326 God, I have been feeling like a shitty person lately, 418 00:19:53,351 --> 00:19:55,357 and now I feel like a really shitty mom. 419 00:19:55,382 --> 00:19:57,316 No, Liza, there's nothing that you could've done. 420 00:19:57,341 --> 00:19:58,523 She got sick. 421 00:19:58,548 --> 00:20:00,068 I could've answered the phone 422 00:20:00,093 --> 00:20:01,278 and told her to go to the doctor, 423 00:20:01,303 --> 00:20:03,828 but I was in the woods getting drunk. 424 00:20:05,086 --> 00:20:06,831 What about her dad? 425 00:20:06,856 --> 00:20:09,056 He's not the one you contact when you have a crisis. 426 00:20:09,081 --> 00:20:11,397 It's me. It's always been me. 427 00:20:11,422 --> 00:20:13,630 I'm really sorry. 428 00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:18,384 I wish there was something I could do. 429 00:20:18,579 --> 00:20:22,084 Oh, my God, it's her. 430 00:20:22,445 --> 00:20:25,255 - Caitlin, hey. - Hi, Mom. 431 00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:28,128 Hey, hi! You okay? 432 00:20:28,153 --> 00:20:29,775 I've been better. 433 00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,800 Ah, I am so sorry I didn't get your call. 434 00:20:32,825 --> 00:20:34,464 It's okay. Are you coming? 435 00:20:34,489 --> 00:20:37,834 I am on my way. I promise. 436 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:41,230 And, honey, just so you know, when it comes to your health, 437 00:20:41,255 --> 00:20:42,603 money is not an issue. 438 00:20:42,628 --> 00:20:45,603 I am so, so sorry you had to go through this. 439 00:20:57,547 --> 00:20:59,592 Hey. Liza went hard at Bonfire, 440 00:20:59,617 --> 00:21:01,358 so I told her to take the day off. 441 00:21:01,383 --> 00:21:04,806 Oh, thanks so much for thinking of me. 442 00:21:05,614 --> 00:21:07,808 You would've been so proud of her... 443 00:21:07,833 --> 00:21:09,695 she partied with all the right people. 444 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:12,146 Oh. I'm surprised. 445 00:21:12,265 --> 00:21:15,983 My bet was on you for being queen of camp. 446 00:21:20,594 --> 00:21:22,704 Hey, Charles? 447 00:21:22,729 --> 00:21:24,732 Good morning. 448 00:21:28,483 --> 00:21:30,719 You were right. Liza definitely deserves 449 00:21:30,772 --> 00:21:32,775 that promotion. 450 00:21:34,896 --> 00:21:37,653 What do you think about bumping her title up 451 00:21:37,678 --> 00:21:39,216 to "associate editor"? 452 00:21:39,241 --> 00:21:41,326 Yeah, that's great, but she... 453 00:21:41,366 --> 00:21:42,905 - also needs a raise. - Ah. 454 00:21:42,930 --> 00:21:44,716 You can take it out of my salary if you need to. 455 00:21:44,741 --> 00:21:48,076 I could not do this job without her. 456 00:21:48,101 --> 00:21:50,639 That won't be necessary. I'll find the money. 457 00:21:54,722 --> 00:21:56,863 She was lucky she got to the hospital when she did. 458 00:21:56,888 --> 00:21:59,312 Yeah, they had to irrigate my abdomen, Maggie. 459 00:21:59,337 --> 00:22:01,686 Ooh, that should keep you out of classes for at least a week. 460 00:22:01,711 --> 00:22:04,407 Oh, yeah. 461 00:22:04,979 --> 00:22:09,389 - How are you holding up? - I am so lucky she had Rose. 462 00:22:09,413 --> 00:22:12,918 - A good roommate is key. - Absolutely. 463 00:22:13,144 --> 00:22:15,225 Hey, did you happen to get Josh's stuff back? 464 00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,794 Uh... 465 00:22:17,819 --> 00:22:20,077 I did. 466 00:22:28,774 --> 00:22:34,164 - Synced and corrected by martythecrazy - - www.MY-SUBS.com - 33084

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