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00:00:01,074 --> 00:00:03,841
So Douglas Hegdahl is taken
to the Hanoi Hilton,
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00:00:03,877 --> 00:00:06,310
a notorious POW camp.
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00:00:06,345 --> 00:00:10,949
And he thinks, I'm gonna
pretend to be... an idiot.
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00:00:10,950 --> 00:00:13,417
- [burps]
- [laughs]
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00:00:13,452 --> 00:00:15,719
So Florence Nightingale
gathers together
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00:00:15,755 --> 00:00:19,023
38 nurses to
take care of these soldiers.
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00:00:19,058 --> 00:00:21,358
The fuck are you doing?
His dick is out.
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00:00:21,394 --> 00:00:22,894
And Florence was like,
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00:00:22,895 --> 00:00:25,262
Fuck you.
His fucking arm's infected.
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00:00:25,298 --> 00:00:27,264
- Why do I want to kick you?
- [chuckles]
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00:00:27,550 --> 00:00:30,517
[patriotic music]
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00:00:35,010 --> 00:00:38,011
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
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00:00:38,948 --> 00:00:42,249
[The Police's "Sending Out An SOS"]
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00:00:42,285 --> 00:00:43,985
- I love you.
- I love you, man.
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00:00:44,019 --> 00:00:46,453
Cheers.
I remember when we first met,
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00:00:46,489 --> 00:00:49,823
every time I saw you, you would
have a boot on your car.
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00:00:49,858 --> 00:00:52,159
[laughs]
18
00:00:52,545 --> 00:00:56,513
- Am I wrong?
- You're not wrong.
19
00:00:56,549 --> 00:00:58,933
- You have a...
- I went through 11 cars
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00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:02,953
in Los Angeles
and 9 of them got booted.
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00:01:02,988 --> 00:01:06,122
[chuckles] That's not false.
I know...
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00:01:06,158 --> 00:01:09,793
None of this... this is all true.
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00:01:09,828 --> 00:01:13,031
- It is a great excuse to not drive.
- Oh, yeah, it's great.
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00:01:13,032 --> 00:01:16,700
- Hey, do you wanna drive?
- I would love to, but I got two boots.
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00:01:16,735 --> 00:01:19,836
Hello. [burps]
I'm Mark Gagliardi.
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00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:23,706
And today, we're gonna be
talking about Douglas Hegdahl.
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00:01:23,741 --> 00:01:25,541
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
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00:01:25,577 --> 00:01:29,545
Our story begins in April of 1967.
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00:01:29,581 --> 00:01:33,482
America is embroiled in
the middle of the Vietnam War.
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00:01:33,517 --> 00:01:35,084
And Douglas Hegdahl
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00:01:35,085 --> 00:01:39,021
is one of the sailors
on the "USS Canberra,"
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00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:42,091
which is a destroyer ship that is
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00:01:42,126 --> 00:01:45,661
going up and down the coast
of North Vietnam.
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00:01:45,697 --> 00:01:49,799
He's just come off
of his 1:00 a.m. watch shift.
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00:01:49,834 --> 00:01:54,003
And boom... Douglas Hegdahl
is blown into the waters
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00:01:54,038 --> 00:01:56,940
of the South China Sea
by the gun that is on
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00:01:56,941 --> 00:01:59,842
the deck of the ship
that he is standing on.
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00:01:59,843 --> 00:02:04,545
So he floats there until
these North Vietnamese fishermen
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00:02:04,581 --> 00:02:06,048
see him in the water;
they pull him up;
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00:02:06,049 --> 00:02:08,617
they put him on board;
and they take care of him;
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00:02:08,652 --> 00:02:10,852
and then, unfortunately,
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00:02:10,887 --> 00:02:15,090
hand him off immediately to
the North Vietnamese soldiers.
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00:02:15,125 --> 00:02:16,759
And the North Vietnamese say,
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00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:19,929
You're a spy!
You never declared war on us.
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00:02:19,930 --> 00:02:22,597
We don't have to abide by the
Gem... Ge...
46
00:02:22,633 --> 00:02:25,734
[groans]
Geneva Conventions.
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00:02:25,769 --> 00:02:27,736
You wanna go to the Hanoi Hilton?
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00:02:27,771 --> 00:02:29,204
'Cause that's where we're going.
49
00:02:29,205 --> 00:02:32,741
- Sounds fancy as hell.
- No-no-no-no-no-no, Derek!
50
00:02:32,776 --> 00:02:35,276
The Hanoi Hilton is not fancy!
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00:02:35,311 --> 00:02:38,079
That is an ironic name, my friend.
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00:02:38,115 --> 00:02:39,547
[chuckles]
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00:02:39,548 --> 00:02:43,183
So Douglas Hegdahl is taken
to the Hanoi Hilton,
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00:02:43,218 --> 00:02:46,754
a notorious POW camp.
55
00:02:46,789 --> 00:02:47,789
- [burps]
- Mm.
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00:02:47,790 --> 00:02:49,090
[blows raspberry]
57
00:02:49,091 --> 00:02:50,891
- Disgusting.
- Look.
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00:02:50,926 --> 00:02:55,595
- Let's not be real jerks about this.
- Okay.
59
00:02:55,631 --> 00:02:58,165
So Douglas Hegdahl
was pulled into meetings
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00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:00,701
with The Rabbit,
who was the guy that
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00:03:00,736 --> 00:03:05,205
was the main interrogator of
this place, a brutal monster.
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00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:06,808
And The Rabbit was like,
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00:03:06,809 --> 00:03:09,978
You don't have a story for me?
I've got a story for you.
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00:03:09,979 --> 00:03:13,980
And he would throw him down
and beat the Christ out of him.
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00:03:14,015 --> 00:03:17,483
And so Douglas Hegdahl,
in the course of his beatings,
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00:03:17,518 --> 00:03:19,318
thinks to himself,
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00:03:19,353 --> 00:03:23,756
Things are crazy.
I gotta figure something out.
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00:03:23,792 --> 00:03:29,862
I know. I'll pretend that
I'm a backwards bumpkin
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00:03:29,898 --> 00:03:34,934
like those guys I grew up with
in Clark, South Dakota.
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00:03:34,969 --> 00:03:40,073
I'm gonna pretend to be...
an idiot.
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00:03:40,108 --> 00:03:42,141
And Douglas Hegdahl's like,
Uh, you know what?
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00:03:42,177 --> 00:03:44,410
I... I agree with you guys.
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00:03:44,445 --> 00:03:46,878
I... I'm on your team now.
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00:03:46,914 --> 00:03:48,714
And the North Vietnamese say,
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00:03:48,749 --> 00:03:52,017
You seem to be a guy who
understands where we're coming from.
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00:03:52,052 --> 00:03:55,053
Why don't we give you these
propaganda things to say?
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And then we won't look like
we're the assholes.
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00:03:57,725 --> 00:04:00,892
And Douglas Hegdahl says,
Oh, uh, problem is,
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00:04:00,928 --> 00:04:04,730
I... I don't really
know how to read so good.
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00:04:04,765 --> 00:04:06,965
So they give him this tutor.
81
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:10,035
And they try to teach him
how to read and write.
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00:04:10,070 --> 00:04:14,272
[mumbling] He's pretending to be stupid.
83
00:04:14,307 --> 00:04:16,007
So Doug Hegdahl's like,
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00:04:16,043 --> 00:04:18,909
Oh, uh, gosh, I need
a new pair of glasses.
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00:04:18,945 --> 00:04:20,578
So what do they do?
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00:04:20,579 --> 00:04:23,949
They fucking take him out
into Hanoi and they're like,
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00:04:23,950 --> 00:04:26,250
We're gonna take you
to go get new glasses.
88
00:04:26,285 --> 00:04:28,753
And he's like,
Oh, gosh, this is great.
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00:04:28,788 --> 00:04:31,455
He memorizes the route...
[camera shutter snaps]
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00:04:31,490 --> 00:04:35,093
from the Hanoi Hilton into
the city where he's gonna go.
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00:04:35,094 --> 00:04:36,561
And on his way back,
92
00:04:36,562 --> 00:04:38,896
he's got this
brand-new pair of glasses.
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00:04:38,931 --> 00:04:41,632
He wanted to learn the
route and he talked these
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00:04:41,633 --> 00:04:44,334
bozos into getting him
a new pair of glasses.
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00:04:44,370 --> 00:04:47,404
- That's great.
- Yeah.
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00:04:47,439 --> 00:04:48,773
[laughs]
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00:04:48,774 --> 00:04:52,376
So Douglas Hegdahl seemed to be
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00:04:52,411 --> 00:04:55,445
the dumbest guy
that the North Vietnamese
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00:04:55,481 --> 00:04:57,347
had ever captured.
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00:04:57,383 --> 00:05:01,418
In fact, the nickname that
the North Vietnamese Army
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00:05:01,453 --> 00:05:05,088
gave Douglas Hegdahl was, quote,
102
00:05:05,123 --> 00:05:07,924
"The Incredibly Stupid One."
103
00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:11,495
So at a certain point, the
North Vietnamese were just like,
104
00:05:11,530 --> 00:05:14,764
What are we gonna do
with this idiot? [chuckles]
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00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:15,866
And they're like,
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00:05:15,867 --> 00:05:19,270
Oh, we take a nap every couple
hours every afternoon, uh...
107
00:05:19,271 --> 00:05:23,072
Why don't we just let this,
uh, really dumb American
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00:05:23,108 --> 00:05:25,441
be the guy that walks the grounds
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00:05:25,476 --> 00:05:28,344
during our dumb afternoon siesta?
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00:05:28,379 --> 00:05:29,980
So Doug Hegdahl's like,
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00:05:29,981 --> 00:05:32,015
Yeah, sure, I'll roam around
the camp...
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00:05:32,050 --> 00:05:33,517
[dramatic music]
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00:05:33,518 --> 00:05:37,620
And sabotage your trucks.
[burps]
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00:05:37,621 --> 00:05:39,089
[thud]
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00:05:39,090 --> 00:05:43,092
[laughing]
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00:05:43,128 --> 00:05:45,093
Boy, this television show is hard.
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00:05:45,129 --> 00:05:46,662
- [laughing]
- I get it.
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00:05:46,663 --> 00:05:49,522
You guys are
a real bunch of dicks.
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00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:51,700
You're laughing because
you know that was a bit.
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00:05:51,735 --> 00:05:53,877
It was a Chris Pratt fall.
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00:05:56,129 --> 00:05:58,230
♪ Hegdahl, summer in the city ♪
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00:05:58,265 --> 00:06:00,198
♪ Hegdahl,
summer in the city! ♪
123
00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:02,467
♪ Back of my neck
getting dirty and gritty ♪
124
00:06:02,502 --> 00:06:04,069
[both laugh]
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00:06:04,070 --> 00:06:06,704
All right, so do you
remember where you were?
126
00:06:06,739 --> 00:06:12,209
So Douglas Hegdahl has convinced
the North Vietnamese Army
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00:06:12,245 --> 00:06:15,679
that he's some sort of
fucking, uh, country bumpkin.
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00:06:15,715 --> 00:06:20,484
So they gave him free rein of
the entirety of the Hanoi Hilton.
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00:06:20,519 --> 00:06:23,954
He decides the best thing
that he can do
130
00:06:23,989 --> 00:06:27,124
is to sabotage
the North Vietnamese.
131
00:06:27,159 --> 00:06:31,027
So Hegdahl puts dirt
in the tanks of the trucks.
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00:06:31,063 --> 00:06:35,665
And all five trucks
are rendered un-drivable.
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00:06:35,700 --> 00:06:37,467
And then Doug Hegdahl is like,
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00:06:37,502 --> 00:06:39,202
I'm going to learn the names
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00:06:39,237 --> 00:06:44,274
of every single man that is
in this POW camp.
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00:06:44,309 --> 00:06:47,543
So he memorizes the names
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00:06:47,579 --> 00:06:51,147
to the tune
of "Old MacDonald Had a Farm."
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00:06:51,182 --> 00:06:54,116
So he's just kind of
walking around the grounds,
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00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:55,753
singing to himself.
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00:06:55,754 --> 00:06:58,854
♪ Old MacDonald had a Dave ♪
141
00:06:58,890 --> 00:07:01,357
♪ E-I-E-I-O ♪
142
00:07:01,393 --> 00:07:04,960
♪ And that Dave's last name
was MacDonald ♪
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00:07:04,996 --> 00:07:07,429
- [chuckles]
- ♪ E-I-E-I-O ♪
144
00:07:07,464 --> 00:07:09,731
♪ With a Dave MacDonald here ♪
145
00:07:09,767 --> 00:07:12,601
♪ And a put him on your list
of people who are ♪
146
00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:15,236
♪ Gonna get on the boat
to get out of this ♪
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00:07:15,272 --> 00:07:17,639
♪ Godforsaken place there ♪
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00:07:17,675 --> 00:07:19,775
♪ E-I-E-I-O ♪
149
00:07:19,810 --> 00:07:20,843
[laughs]
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00:07:20,844 --> 00:07:28,817
So he memorizes 256 names,
every prisoner of this POW camp,
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00:07:28,852 --> 00:07:32,855
- including John McCain.
- Cheers to McCain.
152
00:07:32,856 --> 00:07:34,889
- To John McCain.
- Both: Yeah.
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00:07:34,925 --> 00:07:36,925
Now, the North Vietnamese
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00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:41,095
release three American hostages
every few months.
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00:07:41,096 --> 00:07:45,933
So Douglas Hegdahl is gonna be
one of the guys that
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00:07:45,968 --> 00:07:49,704
the North Vietnamese return
back to the United States.
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00:07:49,739 --> 00:07:53,441
So on August 5, 1969,
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00:07:53,476 --> 00:07:57,211
Hegdahl is released
in a prisoner exchange.
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00:07:57,246 --> 00:08:00,614
So when Hegdahl gets back
to the United States,
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00:08:00,650 --> 00:08:03,250
all of the information
that he's memorized,
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00:08:03,285 --> 00:08:08,239
he shares with Russell... Crowe.
162
00:08:08,439 --> 00:08:10,233
Mark.
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00:08:14,028 --> 00:08:15,229
[flatulence]
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00:08:15,230 --> 00:08:16,831
Inappropriate.
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00:08:16,832 --> 00:08:20,132
[laughs]
166
00:08:20,168 --> 00:08:22,669
[flatulence]
All right, so...
167
00:08:22,704 --> 00:08:26,172
Ross Perot, a rich Texas oilman,
168
00:08:26,207 --> 00:08:29,877
who was also a POW advocate.
And Ross Perot said,
169
00:08:29,878 --> 00:08:32,679
Hey, man, I want you to go
to the Paris Peace talks!
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00:08:32,714 --> 00:08:35,448
And I want you to be
the guy that confronts
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00:08:35,484 --> 00:08:37,184
the North Vietnamese and says,
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00:08:37,185 --> 00:08:39,753
No, no, man!
Here's what y'all did!
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00:08:39,788 --> 00:08:44,123
And Doug Hegdahl was like,
Okay.
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00:08:44,158 --> 00:08:47,793
So Doug Hegdahl flies to Paris.
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00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:49,628
The US delegation shows up
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00:08:49,663 --> 00:08:52,197
and the North Vietnamese
delegation shows up.
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00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:53,566
And then the US is like,
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00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:56,835
We got this dude,
Doug Hegdahl,
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00:08:56,871 --> 00:08:59,938
who was in
one of your POW camps.
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00:08:59,973 --> 00:09:02,809
And he's like,
Hey, guess what, dickheads.
181
00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:05,343
I was faking it the whole time.
182
00:09:05,379 --> 00:09:07,813
You're breaking
the Geneva Convention.
183
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:09,948
You're torturing prisoners.
184
00:09:09,983 --> 00:09:13,985
I saw it with mine own eyes.
185
00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:17,222
So the North Vietnamese are like,
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00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:21,510
Oh, shit!
This guy that we called
187
00:09:21,511 --> 00:09:24,462
"The Incredibly Stupid One"
188
00:09:24,497 --> 00:09:28,599
is actually...
[whispers] Incredibly smart.
189
00:09:28,635 --> 00:09:30,468
So Doug Hegdahl is like,
190
00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:33,538
Fuck, yeah, I am, motherfuckers!
191
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:36,674
Boom! America.
192
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:39,144
And it's thanks to Doug Hegdahl
193
00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:41,579
who had memorized the names
194
00:09:41,614 --> 00:09:47,118
of all 256 POWs that...
195
00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:50,088
- [sighs]
- [chuckles]
196
00:09:50,123 --> 00:09:56,161
So in 1973, all of these
men were finally released
197
00:09:56,196 --> 00:10:00,197
from the Hanoi Hilton,
thanks to the work
198
00:10:00,232 --> 00:10:05,502
- of Seaman Douglas Hegdahl.
- Cheers. Great job, Mark.
199
00:10:05,537 --> 00:10:07,972
Hi!
You're watching "Drunk History."
200
00:10:08,007 --> 00:10:09,441
Wish I wasn't!
201
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:11,675
[laughs]
202
00:10:14,231 --> 00:10:16,665
- Why do I get...
- Pissed at me?
203
00:10:16,701 --> 00:10:18,334
- I drink and I get...
- I know.
204
00:10:18,335 --> 00:10:20,302
Like you're my brother or something
and I wanna punch ya.
205
00:10:20,337 --> 00:10:21,838
- That's cool.
- Is it?
206
00:10:21,839 --> 00:10:24,374
- Oh, I mean, no. But I mean, it's...
- Oh.
207
00:10:24,375 --> 00:10:26,275
Cool that you feel
like I'm your brother.
208
00:10:26,310 --> 00:10:29,278
I don't know,
you're just fun to fuck with.
209
00:10:29,313 --> 00:10:31,580
You know what? Because I know
you can defend yourself
210
00:10:31,616 --> 00:10:33,748
and you can fuck with me worse
than I can fuck with you.
211
00:10:33,784 --> 00:10:35,517
- I know, I hold back.
- Because you're clever.
212
00:10:35,552 --> 00:10:36,886
- I know!
- You throw...
213
00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:39,755
- you... you go out shooting.
- That's so rude.
214
00:10:39,756 --> 00:10:42,892
- I wait for my final bomb.
- Aw, shit, what does that mean? [chuckles]
215
00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:45,127
- I love you.
- Aww.
216
00:10:45,162 --> 00:10:46,695
That was beautiful.
217
00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,564
Hello, my name is Paget Brewster.
218
00:10:49,599 --> 00:10:52,734
And today we will be discussing
Florence Nightingale,
219
00:10:52,769 --> 00:10:55,671
the Mother of Modern Nursing.
220
00:10:56,206 --> 00:10:57,940
Wha... that was perfect!
221
00:10:57,975 --> 00:11:00,509
- Just rolled right off your tongue.
- Did it not?
222
00:11:00,510 --> 00:11:02,078
[mockingly]
The muder of mudern nursing.
223
00:11:02,079 --> 00:11:04,246
Did I say
"The mutter of mudern nursing"?
224
00:11:04,281 --> 00:11:05,815
[very slurred]
The mudder of muddern nurding.
225
00:11:05,816 --> 00:11:08,150
Hi, I'm Paget Brewster,
and today,
226
00:11:08,185 --> 00:11:11,653
we will be discussing
Florence Nightingale,
227
00:11:11,688 --> 00:11:13,621
The Mutter of Modern Nursing.
228
00:11:13,657 --> 00:11:15,623
[both laugh]
229
00:11:15,659 --> 00:11:21,395
Okay, our story begins
in 1830s England,
230
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,998
which is the beginning
of the Victorian Area.
231
00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:25,434
- Oh.
- "Era."
232
00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:29,437
- I've been there.
- Shut... it... up... now.
233
00:11:29,473 --> 00:11:32,440
- [chuckles]
- Okay.
234
00:11:32,476 --> 00:11:35,176
So Florence Nightingale
is the daughter
235
00:11:35,211 --> 00:11:40,615
of a very wealthy affluent family
outside of London.
236
00:11:40,616 --> 00:11:43,650
And Florence is doing
what everyone her age is doing.
237
00:11:43,686 --> 00:11:46,286
She's a teenager
and her mother says,
238
00:11:46,321 --> 00:11:51,191
Oh, this is so great.
You're just gonna study all this stuff.
239
00:11:51,226 --> 00:11:52,861
And then you're gonna marry rich
240
00:11:52,862 --> 00:11:55,328
'cause you're rich,
and you're gonna have kids.
241
00:11:55,364 --> 00:11:57,230
And Florence is like,
242
00:11:57,265 --> 00:11:59,933
Ugh. I don't think I want that at all.
243
00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,168
In fact, I like nursing.
244
00:12:02,204 --> 00:12:04,972
I like fixing people and helping people.
245
00:12:05,007 --> 00:12:07,474
And maybe I'm a fucking
weirdo, I don't fucking know.
246
00:12:07,510 --> 00:12:09,210
And she started thinking,
Oh, my God.
247
00:12:09,244 --> 00:12:12,379
Maybe God has chosen me
for something greater
248
00:12:12,414 --> 00:12:17,183
than just being a rich...
fucking lady. [laughs]
249
00:12:17,219 --> 00:12:20,553
So she tells her parents,
I don't want to run a house.
250
00:12:20,588 --> 00:12:23,589
I just want to be a fucking nurse.
251
00:12:23,625 --> 00:12:26,526
She wants to be a nurse, but
nursing is not a profession.
252
00:12:26,561 --> 00:12:28,961
And at the age of 24,
she leaves the house
253
00:12:28,997 --> 00:12:33,333
and starts interning at the
Harley Street hospital in London.
254
00:12:33,368 --> 00:12:37,837
And in 1853,
the War of Crimea breaks out.
255
00:12:37,872 --> 00:12:39,873
- So...
- Have you ever been in that river?
256
00:12:39,874 --> 00:12:42,192
- Huh?
- "Cry me a" river?
257
00:12:42,492 --> 00:12:46,345
- You never been there?
- Oh, fuck me. Oh, my God.
258
00:12:46,380 --> 00:12:49,882
- [chuckles]
- Oh, God. Why do I want to kick you?
259
00:12:49,918 --> 00:12:52,018
- I get that.
- I like you!
260
00:12:52,053 --> 00:12:55,521
Anyway.
In 1854, the Secretary of War,
261
00:12:55,557 --> 00:12:59,492
Sidney Herbert writes a letter
to Florence Nightingale saying,
262
00:12:59,493 --> 00:13:01,727
Florence, uh, you're a great nurse.
263
00:13:01,763 --> 00:13:02,930
I've heard about your work
264
00:13:02,931 --> 00:13:04,631
at the... at the something hospital
265
00:13:04,632 --> 00:13:07,701
- I already forgot the fucking name of.
- Is that Harley?
266
00:13:07,702 --> 00:13:09,435
Harley Street hospital.
That's right.
267
00:13:09,470 --> 00:13:12,971
I need you to go get
a team of nurses together
268
00:13:13,006 --> 00:13:15,874
and go and help out
our military doctors.
269
00:13:15,909 --> 00:13:19,010
So Florence was like,
Yep, I'm fucking on board.
270
00:13:19,046 --> 00:13:23,282
So Florence gathers together
38 nurses.
271
00:13:23,317 --> 00:13:26,952
And they go to the
Scutari Barracks Hospital
272
00:13:26,987 --> 00:13:31,356
in Constantinople,
which is a piece of shit!
273
00:13:31,392 --> 00:13:34,359
It was rats and lice.
274
00:13:34,395 --> 00:13:37,196
It's not even a hospital;
it's a barracks.
275
00:13:37,231 --> 00:13:39,565
So they show up,
and the male doctors,
276
00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:41,499
they flip the fuck out.
277
00:13:41,534 --> 00:13:43,602
They're like,
Fuck these broads.
278
00:13:43,637 --> 00:13:45,770
We don't need any chicks here.
279
00:13:45,806 --> 00:13:49,540
God damn it.
This sucks.
280
00:13:49,576 --> 00:13:52,611
- Would you like me to help you?
- Yes, please, Derek.
281
00:13:56,382 --> 00:13:59,584
You broke it!
[laughs]
282
00:13:59,620 --> 00:14:01,486
That's pretty manly.
[laughs]
283
00:14:01,521 --> 00:14:03,089
[shimmering tone]
284
00:14:03,090 --> 00:14:05,891
Thank you.
Gi... Don't you...
285
00:14:05,892 --> 00:14:09,193
- Give me my fucking booze, bitch!
- [laughs]
286
00:14:09,229 --> 00:14:11,796
All right, you're
fucking in for it now.
287
00:14:11,832 --> 00:14:15,333
So the doctor's pissed off,
and Florence is like,
288
00:14:15,368 --> 00:14:17,101
Yeah-yeah-yeah, I get that.
289
00:14:17,136 --> 00:14:19,069
It's never happened
before in history,
290
00:14:19,105 --> 00:14:22,205
but I'm here now,
my ladies are here now.
291
00:14:22,241 --> 00:14:28,112
Florence and her nurses are
shocked at the conditions,
292
00:14:28,147 --> 00:14:29,980
but they believe in Florence,
and they're like,
293
00:14:30,016 --> 00:14:32,483
All right.
We're gonna do whatever she says.
294
00:14:32,484 --> 00:14:34,384
Let's go.
Let's clean this up.
295
00:14:34,419 --> 00:14:38,188
Two days later,
thousands of soldiers injured
296
00:14:38,223 --> 00:14:40,124
from the Battle of Inkerman
297
00:14:40,159 --> 00:14:44,061
are brought into
the barracks hospital.
298
00:14:44,096 --> 00:14:50,310
This was 3,000 soldiers
laying on straw pallets.
299
00:14:50,369 --> 00:14:53,236
They are covered in
their own excrement.
300
00:14:53,272 --> 00:14:56,174
They are bleeding.
So the doctors are like,
301
00:14:56,175 --> 00:14:58,941
Oh, shit.
Fuck it, we need your help.
302
00:14:58,977 --> 00:15:02,512
She ends up being known as
the lady with the lamp,
303
00:15:02,548 --> 00:15:06,483
because it was this British woman
there in Crimea,
304
00:15:06,485 --> 00:15:08,851
holding a lamp and visiting soldiers.
305
00:15:08,887 --> 00:15:14,191
But one night, while she
was changing the dressing
306
00:15:14,226 --> 00:15:17,561
of a man who had had
an arm amputation,
307
00:15:17,596 --> 00:15:20,597
an army doctor walked in.
308
00:15:20,632 --> 00:15:23,733
- And the man was naked.
- But why?
309
00:15:23,768 --> 00:15:25,102
Because they had no resources.
310
00:15:25,103 --> 00:15:27,303
And the doctor said to Florence,
311
00:15:27,338 --> 00:15:29,471
The fuck are you doing?
His dick is out.
312
00:15:29,507 --> 00:15:33,475
And Florence was like,
Fuck you. His fucking arm's infected.
313
00:15:33,511 --> 00:15:34,978
Holding for plane.
[distant plane drones]
314
00:15:34,979 --> 00:15:37,980
Oh, my God,
we're holding for a plane.
315
00:15:39,524 --> 00:15:42,291
- Don't kick me.
- I have a twitch.
316
00:15:42,326 --> 00:15:44,393
I am not a fan of this.
I thought you were a gentleman.
317
00:15:44,429 --> 00:15:45,763
Florence Nightingale.
I thought you liked...
318
00:15:45,764 --> 00:15:47,864
Oh, I'm a fan of Florence
Nightingale, not you!
319
00:15:47,899 --> 00:15:49,899
- You ready?
- [chuckles]
320
00:15:49,935 --> 00:15:52,501
Shut up!
321
00:15:52,537 --> 00:15:57,041
I'm gonna kick you in the nuts!
Bring your nuts closer
322
00:15:57,042 --> 00:15:59,675
so I can kick the...
'cause I'm tired.
323
00:15:59,710 --> 00:16:00,810
[soft laugh]
324
00:16:00,811 --> 00:16:03,445
So all of these soldiers are amazed
325
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,481
this lady with a lamp
was protecting them.
326
00:16:06,516 --> 00:16:08,917
And the soldiers were
saying to each other,
327
00:16:08,953 --> 00:16:11,252
This is the only person
that's cared about us.
328
00:16:11,288 --> 00:16:14,222
And Florence and
her nurses have done
329
00:16:14,257 --> 00:16:17,893
everything they can do.
330
00:16:17,928 --> 00:16:20,862
Unfortunately, in the four months
331
00:16:20,898 --> 00:16:25,601
that they are first there,
4,777 soldiers die.
332
00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:29,004
And Florence says,
I'm so fucking angry.
333
00:16:29,039 --> 00:16:31,873
I'm so angry we lost so many men.
334
00:16:31,909 --> 00:16:35,109
And I need to find out why we failed.
335
00:16:35,144 --> 00:16:38,879
So the Crimean War ends in 1856.
336
00:16:38,915 --> 00:16:41,181
And Florence gets back to England.
337
00:16:41,217 --> 00:16:48,355
And she is awarded a $250,000
war fund dispensation gift
338
00:16:48,390 --> 00:16:49,958
from Queen Victoria.
339
00:16:49,959 --> 00:16:52,960
But Queen Victoria says,
What happened in Crimea?
340
00:16:52,996 --> 00:16:56,330
And Florence says,
I don't fucking know.
341
00:16:56,365 --> 00:17:01,168
It was bad.
And I think I noticed a trend.
342
00:17:01,203 --> 00:17:03,871
And I'm gonna have to
fucking think about this.
343
00:17:03,906 --> 00:17:09,709
She is also really sick.
She has the Crimean flu.
344
00:17:09,745 --> 00:17:13,714
- I mean, bad, coughing, sputum.
- What's sputum?
345
00:17:13,715 --> 00:17:17,083
Sputum's an old term for mucus.
346
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,686
- Too much informashe.
- "Informashe"?
347
00:17:19,721 --> 00:17:21,188
[chuckles]
348
00:17:21,189 --> 00:17:24,759
- I will not accept that from you.
- Crimea river.
349
00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:27,593
- Shut up. Fuck you. I'm drunk.
- [laughs]
350
00:17:29,605 --> 00:17:31,072
- Okay, you ready?
- Yes.
351
00:17:31,073 --> 00:17:33,774
[exhales]
And it should start with me
352
00:17:33,810 --> 00:17:36,276
speaking to the camera
full of rage, right?
353
00:17:36,312 --> 00:17:38,212
- Mm-hmm.
- Like, rage and regret.
354
00:17:38,247 --> 00:17:40,581
- Yeah, like chugging that.
- Like "chugganaut"?
355
00:17:40,616 --> 00:17:41,616
Like chugging that.
356
00:17:41,617 --> 00:17:43,317
- Oh, chugging this?
- Mm-hmm.
357
00:17:43,353 --> 00:17:44,136
'Cause that's what I do
358
00:17:44,137 --> 00:17:46,620
- every year, I chug...
- Yeah.
359
00:17:46,656 --> 00:17:48,929
You know what,
I am gonna chug it.
360
00:17:48,994 --> 00:17:52,851
[music]
361
00:17:53,062 --> 00:17:54,730
Okay.
You remember where you were?
362
00:17:54,731 --> 00:17:56,297
- Yes.
- You do. Okay.
363
00:17:56,298 --> 00:17:58,065
Okay, so...
364
00:17:58,100 --> 00:18:00,835
Florence goes back to England
365
00:18:00,870 --> 00:18:04,438
and just goes to her bed.
366
00:18:04,474 --> 00:18:09,709
She's so ill that she
stays in bed for 11 years.
367
00:18:09,745 --> 00:18:10,845
- What?
- And it... yes.
368
00:18:10,846 --> 00:18:13,146
In those 11 years,
369
00:18:13,182 --> 00:18:16,283
she starts studying all of
her notes from Constantinople.
370
00:18:16,318 --> 00:18:18,085
And she's like, I know
something was wrong here.
371
00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:20,354
And she's building graphs.
372
00:18:20,389 --> 00:18:22,356
And she starts seeing a pattern.
373
00:18:22,391 --> 00:18:25,192
And she's like, I think
I figured out what happened.
374
00:18:25,227 --> 00:18:28,061
The men at the Scutari Hospital
375
00:18:28,097 --> 00:18:32,816
were ten times more likely to die
from an infectious disease
376
00:18:32,817 --> 00:18:34,801
than from a war wound.
377
00:18:34,836 --> 00:18:37,737
That's why we failed.
It was hygiene.
378
00:18:37,773 --> 00:18:40,940
And she was like,
Cleanliness is next to godliness.
379
00:18:40,975 --> 00:18:46,513
So she presents all of this
analytical data to Queen Victoria.
380
00:18:46,514 --> 00:18:49,715
And in 1859, she wrote a book
381
00:18:49,750 --> 00:18:52,018
called "Notes on Nursing."
382
00:18:52,053 --> 00:18:55,588
Years go by,
and Florence uses the money
383
00:18:55,589 --> 00:18:57,623
that Queen Victoria gave her
384
00:18:57,658 --> 00:19:02,895
to found the Nightingale
School of Nursing,
385
00:19:02,931 --> 00:19:09,668
which is the first nursing school
in the history of ever?
386
00:19:09,703 --> 00:19:13,171
Nursing didn't exist
until Florence Nightingale.
387
00:19:13,206 --> 00:19:17,943
Also, when Florence
Nightingale is 87 years old,
388
00:19:17,978 --> 00:19:22,280
she received the Order of Merit
from Queen Victoria,
389
00:19:22,316 --> 00:19:24,950
who still is kicking,
and is like,
390
00:19:24,985 --> 00:19:28,119
This fucking Florence is great!
391
00:19:28,155 --> 00:19:31,491
She fixed a bunch of shit.
I like her moxie.
392
00:19:31,492 --> 00:19:35,126
This was the first time
a woman was ever awarded
393
00:19:35,162 --> 00:19:37,295
the Order of Merit.
394
00:19:37,331 --> 00:19:39,797
And that's a big fucking deal.
395
00:19:39,833 --> 00:19:41,100
- [burps]
- Are you okay?
396
00:19:41,101 --> 00:19:43,869
- Yeah, I burped.
- I know. That looked aggressive.
397
00:19:43,870 --> 00:19:47,239
- It was not an aggressive burp.
- I mean, aggressive as in, like,
398
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:48,740
I wanna make sure
you're not gonna throw up.
399
00:19:48,741 --> 00:19:50,575
- Okay?
- You know I wouldn't, I'm a lady.
400
00:19:50,610 --> 00:19:55,713
- Oh. Curtsy.
- [British accent] "C... Curtsy."
401
00:19:55,748 --> 00:19:57,283
Okay, you ready?
402
00:19:57,284 --> 00:20:00,118
So Florence Nightingale
was responsible
403
00:20:00,153 --> 00:20:02,920
for pioneering an industry
404
00:20:02,956 --> 00:20:06,891
and giving women a job
and a purpose
405
00:20:06,926 --> 00:20:10,928
that they weren't allowed
at that time.
406
00:20:10,964 --> 00:20:15,032
So what she did
was really extraordinary.
407
00:20:15,067 --> 00:20:19,704
And it's amazing.
159 years later,
408
00:20:19,739 --> 00:20:23,374
her book is still used
in hospitals today.
409
00:20:23,409 --> 00:20:27,512
My math is not good.
It might be 170-something.
410
00:20:27,547 --> 00:20:30,749
- Remember, it's 2019.
- Okay, I don't like math.
411
00:20:30,750 --> 00:20:33,273
I want you to do it.
Not because you're a man.
412
00:20:33,308 --> 00:20:36,804
- Well, kind of.
- Uh...
413
00:20:37,818 --> 00:20:41,403
_
414
00:20:41,438 --> 00:20:45,440
[patriotic music]
415
00:20:54,016 --> 00:20:58,049
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
416
00:21:01,174 --> 00:21:04,895
[patriotic music]
32321
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