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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:03:10,130 --> 00:03:12,620 [ Man Narrating ] The place, New York City. 2 00:03:12,700 --> 00:03:16,690 The time, now, 1962. 3 00:03:16,770 --> 00:03:19,930 And there's no time or place like it. 4 00:03:20,010 --> 00:03:21,940 If you've got a dream... 5 00:03:22,010 --> 00:03:24,840 this is the place to make that dream come true. 6 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:28,620 That's why the soaring population of hopeful dreamers... 7 00:03:28,700 --> 00:03:31,670 has just reached eight million people. 8 00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:37,510 Oh.! Make that eight million and one. 9 00:03:37,570 --> 00:03:41,010 [ woman ] Hey, taxi.! Taxi.! 10 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:44,450 Hey, wait! Where are you going? 11 00:03:57,830 --> 00:04:00,160 [ Chanting ] Down with the bomb! 12 00:04:00,230 --> 00:04:02,820 Down with the bomb! Down with the bomb! 13 00:04:02,900 --> 00:04:04,830 Down with the bomb! 14 00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:07,890 - Down with the bomb! - [ Taxi Backfires ] 15 00:04:07,970 --> 00:04:09,940 [ All Screaming ] 16 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:27,890 [ Sighs ] 17 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:29,890 [ Dinging ] 18 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,860 [ Dinging Continues ] 19 00:04:43,470 --> 00:04:46,000 [ Loud Ding ] 20 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:01,250 [ Loud Ding ] 21 00:05:06,260 --> 00:05:09,390 - [ Loud Ding ] - Barbara? 22 00:05:09,470 --> 00:05:11,370 - Oh. - [ Coughing ] 23 00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,170 - Barbara Novak? - Oh, I think so. 24 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:16,540 - Oh, thank goodness you're here! - Vikki? 25 00:05:16,610 --> 00:05:19,040 Vikki Hiller, your editor, in the flesh. 26 00:05:19,110 --> 00:05:22,740 It is so nice to finally meet you in person. 27 00:05:22,810 --> 00:05:25,040 My goodness, you're gorgeous! 28 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:28,210 We're gonna set up a photo shoot for the book jacket. 29 00:05:28,290 --> 00:05:31,850 There's plenty of time. The book doesn't come out for a week. One week! 30 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:34,910 Oh, my! Don't be nervous. Cigarette? 31 00:05:34,990 --> 00:05:37,890 - [ Bell Dings ] - [ Coughing ] 32 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:41,120 Barbara, this is my secretary Gladys. Gladys, Barbara Novak. 33 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,130 Oh, I know. It's a pleasure. 34 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:47,140 Hello, Gladys! I'm glad to finally have a face to put with the voice. 35 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:50,900 Vick, I need you to sigh off on this pronto. 36 00:05:50,970 --> 00:05:53,370 MauriceJohns, art director. 37 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:57,040 Barbara Novak, your cover! 38 00:05:57,110 --> 00:05:59,950 - [ Gasping ] - [ Barbara ] Oh, Maurice.! 39 00:06:00,020 --> 00:06:02,420 I love it! 40 00:06:02,490 --> 00:06:05,110 Down with Love. Hear! Hear! 41 00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:07,890 I only wish somebody had written your book 10 years ago... 42 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,890 before it was too late for me. 43 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:12,290 Gladys, it's never too late. 44 00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:15,820 Great job. Sorry if the guys in New Production have been riding your tail. 45 00:06:15,900 --> 00:06:18,060 I'm not. 46 00:06:21,210 --> 00:06:23,670 They're ready for you in the lion's den. 47 00:06:27,310 --> 00:06:30,770 - Lion's den? - Oh, don't worry. You'll be fine. 48 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:35,250 Just take a deep breath. 49 00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:41,850 [ Coughs ] 50 00:06:46,060 --> 00:06:49,230 Gentlemen, this is Miss Novak. 51 00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,830 - E.G. - C.B. 52 00:06:53,900 --> 00:06:55,670 - C.W. - J.B. 53 00:06:55,740 --> 00:06:57,500 - J.R. - R.J. 54 00:06:57,570 --> 00:06:59,600 - Okay. - O.K. can't make it. 55 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,610 - He's down with T.B. - Oh, what a shame. Is it serious? 56 00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:06,810 No, they're just having breakfast. T.B. is Theodore Banner. 57 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:10,320 You know, the owner of Banner House, the fellow publishing your little book? 58 00:07:10,390 --> 00:07:13,380 That's his portrait, there. 59 00:07:15,260 --> 00:07:18,390 [ Vikki ] Forgive me if we kept you waiting, but Barbara hit a storm... 60 00:07:18,460 --> 00:07:20,400 on her way down from Maine. 61 00:07:20,460 --> 00:07:23,370 - So you've come down from Maine, huh? - You remember, C.B. 62 00:07:23,430 --> 00:07:26,370 Miss Novak is the farmer's daughter librarian... 63 00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:29,130 who spent the long, cold New England winter... 64 00:07:29,210 --> 00:07:33,040 writing her manuscript by the light of a lonely oil lamp. 65 00:07:33,110 --> 00:07:34,870 I'm at a loss here, ladies. 66 00:07:34,950 --> 00:07:38,970 I'm afraid I don't know exactly what Miss Novak's book is about. 67 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:43,280 Miss Novak's book is a serious work of nonfiction entitled-- 68 00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:45,840 Vikki, excuse me. It's right behind you. 69 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,790 Would you mind pouring me a cup of coffee? 70 00:07:50,430 --> 00:07:52,760 It's a serious work of nonfiction... 71 00:07:52,830 --> 00:07:55,200 entitled Down With Love. 72 00:07:55,270 --> 00:07:58,530 - This is empty. - If you're making a fresh pot, I'll have a cup. 73 00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,500 - Count me in. - Likewise. 74 00:08:00,570 --> 00:08:02,090 - Ditto. - None for me, Vikki. 75 00:08:02,170 --> 00:08:05,160 - Thanks, R.J. - I'll have a Sanka. 76 00:08:08,750 --> 00:08:12,550 As I was saying, the central thesis of Miss Novak's book, Down With Love... 77 00:08:12,620 --> 00:08:15,410 is that women will never be happy until they become... 78 00:08:15,490 --> 00:08:20,050 independent as individuals by achieving equal participation in the workforce. 79 00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:23,890 And how do you propose women do this, Miss Novak? 80 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:27,290 By saying, "Down with love." 81 00:08:27,360 --> 00:08:29,530 Love is a distraction. 82 00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:32,630 If women were to stop falling in love, it would mean the end of the human race. 83 00:08:32,700 --> 00:08:34,730 Not at all. 84 00:08:34,810 --> 00:08:38,040 I said women should refrain from love, C.W.... 85 00:08:38,110 --> 00:08:40,040 not sex. 86 00:08:40,110 --> 00:08:43,140 Isn't that the same thing? 87 00:08:44,180 --> 00:08:46,780 I mean, for women. 88 00:08:46,850 --> 00:08:50,680 It won't be, after they've mastered the three levels I've outlined in my book... 89 00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:53,880 that will teach any woman to live life the way a man does. 90 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:58,090 Level one instructs women to abstain from men altogether... 91 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:02,960 so they'll stop thinking that the pleasures experienced during the sex act are related to love. 92 00:09:03,030 --> 00:09:05,660 They're not, as women will learn... 93 00:09:05,740 --> 00:09:09,230 by practicing the self-pleasuring technique that I've detailed... 94 00:09:09,310 --> 00:09:13,830 in chapter seven entitled... "Up with Chocolate." 95 00:09:13,910 --> 00:09:16,170 - [ Groaning ] - You see, gentlemen... 96 00:09:16,250 --> 00:09:19,650 the female experiences a biological reaction to chocolate... 97 00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:23,910 that triggers the same pleasurable responses as are triggered during the sex act. 98 00:09:23,990 --> 00:09:26,920 By substituting chocolate for sex... 99 00:09:26,990 --> 00:09:30,790 the female will soon learn the difference between sex and love. 100 00:09:30,860 --> 00:09:34,590 Love for a man will no longer occupy her mind. 101 00:09:34,660 --> 00:09:38,000 She will now find that she has the time and the energy... 102 00:09:38,070 --> 00:09:40,000 to move on to level two... 103 00:09:40,070 --> 00:09:43,730 where taking on new challenges will lead to the self-sufficience of level three... 104 00:09:43,810 --> 00:09:46,330 where the woman becomes active in the workplace... 105 00:09:46,410 --> 00:09:49,810 and earns and achieves an unequivocal equality... 106 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,810 with men. 107 00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:59,620 And all this time the woman is abstaining from sex? 108 00:09:59,690 --> 00:10:01,620 Heavens no! 109 00:10:01,690 --> 00:10:05,250 By level three, she can have sex whenever she likes, without love... 110 00:10:05,330 --> 00:10:09,160 and enjoy it the way a man does-- à la carte. 111 00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:17,030 Well, Miss Novak, your theories... 112 00:10:17,110 --> 00:10:19,840 may have worked with the gentlemen up in Maine... 113 00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:24,870 but the men in Manhattan are not the fine, upstanding, straightforward men of Maine. 114 00:10:24,950 --> 00:10:27,850 The men of Manhattan are devious. 115 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:31,220 They're dangerous. They'll be coming at you from every angle. 116 00:10:31,290 --> 00:10:34,190 While you're watching your front, they'll attack from the rear! 117 00:10:34,260 --> 00:10:38,590 And while you're protecting your rear, they'll drop out of the sky. 118 00:10:41,830 --> 00:10:44,160 Adios. 119 00:10:45,540 --> 00:10:49,100 Oh, one more kiss.! 120 00:10:52,610 --> 00:10:55,540 [ English Accent ] Easy, baby. Be careful you don't fall out. 121 00:10:55,610 --> 00:10:57,440 [ Gasps ] 122 00:10:59,150 --> 00:11:00,880 Bye-bye.! 123 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:12,380 Very good. I'll let him know. 124 00:11:12,460 --> 00:11:15,450 Mr. MacMannus? Catcher Block has just landed on the roof. 125 00:11:15,530 --> 00:11:19,020 [ Phones Ringing ] 126 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:23,170 [ women Chattering ] 127 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:25,210 [ Gasping, Clearing Throats ] 128 00:11:25,270 --> 00:11:27,260 [ Receptionist ] KNOW magazine. 129 00:11:31,950 --> 00:11:34,710 - Are you Catcher Block's secretary? - Yes, Mr. MacMannus. 130 00:11:34,780 --> 00:11:36,750 I'm Sally. I'm new. 131 00:11:36,820 --> 00:11:39,790 They're always new. When he gets in, tell him to see me. 132 00:11:39,860 --> 00:11:41,580 He's fired. 133 00:11:43,090 --> 00:11:44,820 [ Clicks Tongue ] 134 00:11:44,890 --> 00:11:46,920 - You're fired! - No, I'm not. 135 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,830 Oh, yes, you are! 136 00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:52,230 So you can take your Pulitzer and your beloved Underwood and your change of underwear... 137 00:11:52,300 --> 00:11:54,230 and clear out. 138 00:11:54,300 --> 00:11:56,600 Do you work for me? 139 00:11:58,870 --> 00:12:02,140 You had a story due yesterday, but I gave you more time. 140 00:12:02,210 --> 00:12:06,910 I held the presses so you could get your scoop on Nazis hiding in Argentina. 141 00:12:06,980 --> 00:12:10,180 Then I see this.! 142 00:12:10,250 --> 00:12:14,590 "Item: KNOw magazine's star journalist, Catcher Block... 143 00:12:14,660 --> 00:12:17,520 "ladies' man, man's man, man about town, [ Growls ] 144 00:12:17,590 --> 00:12:20,580 "was seen leaving the Copa last night with a doggie bag... 145 00:12:20,660 --> 00:12:22,990 and three girls from the floor show." 146 00:12:23,060 --> 00:12:25,830 [ Laughing ] I took the Bossa Nova triplets to Cocoa Beach. 147 00:12:25,900 --> 00:12:27,840 NASA was throwing a luau. 148 00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:29,840 Well, I hope you enjoyed it... 149 00:12:29,910 --> 00:12:33,170 because unless you found Nazis hiding at your luau, you're fired! 150 00:12:35,340 --> 00:12:39,340 There were Nazis hiding at your luau! I knew you'd do it! 151 00:12:39,410 --> 00:12:41,580 What do you got for me, Catch? What do you got? 152 00:12:41,650 --> 00:12:45,310 Argentina isn't the only hiding place for Nazis. They're hiding them in Florida too. 153 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:47,790 Wow! How? Who's hiding them? 154 00:12:47,860 --> 00:12:50,420 - We are. - We Americans? 155 00:12:50,490 --> 00:12:53,220 Why? Nazis are bad. We're good. 156 00:12:53,300 --> 00:12:56,090 Yeah, but some bad Nazis are good scientists. 157 00:12:56,160 --> 00:13:00,360 The guy building the rocket that'll land on the moon first and win us the space race? 158 00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:03,400 He's a Nazi, and I saw the top-secret file to prove it. 159 00:13:03,470 --> 00:13:05,960 Here. I brought you a souvenir. 160 00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:08,370 Whoa! 161 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:13,350 [ Gasps ] A top-secret NASA security clearance badge! 162 00:13:13,420 --> 00:13:16,320 - How did you get this? - Blame it on the bossa nova. 163 00:13:16,380 --> 00:13:18,850 The triplets? 164 00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:20,850 Yeah. 165 00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:24,820 You see, Lola shakes her maracas... 166 00:13:24,890 --> 00:13:27,620 and Rosa bounces her bongos... 167 00:13:27,700 --> 00:13:30,100 while Nina is all hands-- 168 00:13:30,170 --> 00:13:33,160 120 words a minute. 169 00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:35,640 The story? It's written? 170 00:13:35,700 --> 00:13:37,700 Whoa! Catch! 171 00:13:37,770 --> 00:13:40,540 But is it safe to print? NASA's gonna blow its stack. 172 00:13:40,610 --> 00:13:44,810 Well, they forgave Germany. They can forgive us. 173 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:48,370 Get someone from Legal up here. 174 00:13:48,450 --> 00:13:50,510 Yes, sir. Yes, sir. 175 00:13:50,590 --> 00:13:53,020 Yes, sir. Yes, sir! 176 00:13:53,090 --> 00:13:56,850 My analyst says I only react to you with such vehement loathing... 177 00:13:56,930 --> 00:13:58,920 because I admire you so much. 178 00:13:58,990 --> 00:14:01,990 He says I resent you for being a self-made man... 179 00:14:02,060 --> 00:14:04,550 as opposed to the son of a self-made man. 180 00:14:04,630 --> 00:14:08,360 Here. Hope you have your garters from last night. There's none in here. 181 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:12,670 Garters? I haven't worn garters since Nixon conceded. 182 00:14:12,740 --> 00:14:15,300 What, are you turning into some sort of beatnik? 183 00:14:15,380 --> 00:14:18,540 Step into the future. Garters are a thing of the past. 184 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:23,250 I don't know, Catch. 185 00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:25,750 I have enough of an insecurity complex... 186 00:14:25,820 --> 00:14:29,120 without worrying about my socks falling down. 187 00:14:29,190 --> 00:14:33,750 How can you be confident you won't show a shiny shin when you cross your legs? 188 00:14:33,830 --> 00:14:35,990 It's a miracle of the space age. 189 00:14:36,060 --> 00:14:41,000 Silk manufacturers are using new wonder fibers like Lycra, Orlon and Dacron... 190 00:14:41,070 --> 00:14:44,130 to put super stay-up power into their over-the-calf sock. 191 00:14:44,210 --> 00:14:47,700 [ Peter] What would you say is the average length for most men? 192 00:14:47,780 --> 00:14:49,710 [ Catcher] How would I know? 193 00:14:49,780 --> 00:14:53,440 You think I spend all my time in the locker room at the club making a comparative study? 194 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:55,570 [ Peter] Let me see yours again, then. 195 00:14:55,650 --> 00:14:57,580 We could measure. I'll get a ruler. 196 00:14:57,650 --> 00:15:00,420 - [ Catcher] Better make it a yardstick. - [ Gasps ] 197 00:15:00,490 --> 00:15:04,080 Let's be accurate. Make sure you've got it fully extended. 198 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,090 Have it up the whole way. 199 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:09,130 [ Catcher] It stays up all the way all day long, man. 200 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:12,830 That's the miracle I was telling you about. Better living through chemistry. 201 00:15:12,900 --> 00:15:15,230 You got 16 inches. 202 00:15:15,300 --> 00:15:17,460 [ Peter] Sixteen inches? 203 00:15:17,540 --> 00:15:19,700 How long does a man's hose have to be? 204 00:15:19,770 --> 00:15:22,710 [ Catcher] That's 32 inches of confidence in every step. 205 00:15:22,780 --> 00:15:26,010 Don't forget-- I've got two of 'em. 206 00:15:30,290 --> 00:15:34,120 I don't believe it. You went through another one. That's three this month. 207 00:15:34,190 --> 00:15:38,220 What is it about the workplace that women just can't seem to handle? 208 00:15:38,290 --> 00:15:41,020 Men! They want us to fail. 209 00:15:41,100 --> 00:15:43,930 The nerve, inviting me to New York to launch my book... 210 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,300 when they have no intention of promoting it! 211 00:15:46,370 --> 00:15:48,530 - Don't worry. I have a plan. - You do? 212 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:52,560 Remember last winter you said you'd like publicity where men would see it too? 213 00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:54,730 "Perhaps in a men's magazine," you said. 214 00:15:54,810 --> 00:15:56,800 "A prestigious men's magazine. 215 00:15:56,880 --> 00:16:00,140 The most widely circulated and highly respected men's magazine." 216 00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:02,150 - KNOw? - Yes, you did. 217 00:16:02,220 --> 00:16:05,310 No, I mean KNOw. KNOw magazine, for men in the know. 218 00:16:05,390 --> 00:16:07,360 Oh, yes. Exactly. 219 00:16:07,420 --> 00:16:11,090 - You got us advertising in KNOw? - I did better. 220 00:16:11,160 --> 00:16:15,930 I got you a cover story written by KNOw magazine's star journalist Catcher Block. 221 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,490 Catcher Block? The ladies' man, man's man, man about town? 222 00:16:19,570 --> 00:16:22,370 Oh, Vikki, you're the best friend... 223 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,870 a girl from Maine who wrote a book and came to New York could ever have! 224 00:16:25,940 --> 00:16:27,930 You don't know the half of it. 225 00:16:28,010 --> 00:16:31,570 I hear Catcher Block is gorgeous... and eligible. 226 00:16:32,780 --> 00:16:34,940 Not that that matters to us. 227 00:16:35,020 --> 00:16:36,950 Down with love! 228 00:16:37,020 --> 00:16:41,750 I can't believe it. Me on the cover of KNOw. KNOw! 229 00:16:41,820 --> 00:16:45,490 - No. - Catch, please, I promised. It's one cover story. 230 00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:49,220 A girl's never called me in my life, let alone invited me for a drink. 231 00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:51,290 I think this Vikki really likes me. 232 00:16:51,370 --> 00:16:53,300 I think I might really like her. 233 00:16:53,370 --> 00:16:57,170 I'm sure I would if she really likes me, and she does because I led her to believe... 234 00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:59,970 that as the owner of KNOw magazine, I had some pull with my staff. 235 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:02,870 Then pull your staff with one of your other writers. I'm not doing it. 236 00:17:02,940 --> 00:17:04,880 No, it can't be anyone else. 237 00:17:04,950 --> 00:17:09,250 The best thing I have to offer a woman is the same as the best thing you have to offer--you. 238 00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:12,380 But I'm all tied up, Mac. I'm using me. 239 00:17:12,450 --> 00:17:14,950 Oh, come on! It'll be fun. 240 00:17:15,020 --> 00:17:17,290 - You like fun. - Fun? 241 00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:21,090 Interviewing a man-hating embittered New England spinster librarian? 242 00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:22,750 How do you know what she's like? 243 00:17:22,830 --> 00:17:25,460 Who else would write a book called Down with Love? 244 00:17:25,530 --> 00:17:29,590 You don't have to be a Nazi rocket scientist to figure that out. 245 00:17:29,670 --> 00:17:33,470 Catch, please, please, please, please? 246 00:17:33,580 --> 00:17:36,700 I hope you won't be disappointed. 247 00:17:41,250 --> 00:17:43,180 [ Gasps ] 248 00:18:04,910 --> 00:18:09,210 Oh, Vikki, it's adorable. 249 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:12,140 [ Phone Ringing ] 250 00:18:12,210 --> 00:18:15,510 My first New York phone call! 251 00:18:15,580 --> 00:18:19,490 It must be KNOw magazine. No one else has your number. 252 00:18:20,690 --> 00:18:22,750 It must be Catcher Block! 253 00:18:22,820 --> 00:18:24,820 - Oh! - Oh! 254 00:18:26,830 --> 00:18:29,820 - This is Barbara Novak. - This is Catcher Block. 255 00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:33,560 Catcher Block. Catcher Block. 256 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:36,600 - KNOw magazine. - Oh, yes, of course. 257 00:18:36,670 --> 00:18:39,500 What can I do for you, Mr. Block? 258 00:18:39,570 --> 00:18:42,070 I think it's what I can do for you, Miss Novak. 259 00:18:42,140 --> 00:18:44,870 I'd like to invite you to lunch so we can discuss your book. 260 00:18:44,950 --> 00:18:46,940 That sounds very nice... 261 00:18:47,020 --> 00:18:50,080 but I'll have to check my schedule to see when I'm available. 262 00:18:50,150 --> 00:18:53,550 We've already ordered. Can you be in the Mahogany Room in ten minutes? 263 00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:56,220 I'm afraid that will be impossible, Mr. Block. 264 00:18:56,290 --> 00:18:58,850 - Some other time, then. - Right. 265 00:18:58,930 --> 00:19:01,730 I'll see you in 15. 266 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:03,800 [ Both Squealing ] 267 00:19:03,930 --> 00:19:08,430 Catch, you are the best friend a guy with 20 diagnosed neuroses ever had. 268 00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,490 We've been friends a long time. I knew you when you only had 12. 269 00:19:11,570 --> 00:19:13,730 This is great! I'll be right back. 270 00:19:13,810 --> 00:19:16,640 Gotta go put in my shoe lifts. 271 00:19:20,410 --> 00:19:23,250 - Guess who. - As if I'd need to guess. 272 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:25,810 - Hmm. Tell me my name. - Tell me you love me. 273 00:19:25,890 --> 00:19:27,880 Blimey, Catch. You know I love you. 274 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:31,690 And I love you too... Gwendolyn. 275 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:33,750 Oh. 276 00:19:35,930 --> 00:19:38,420 - How long's your layover? - Never long enough. 277 00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:41,090 There's always time for a matinee. 278 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:39,180 Well, hello, Peter. Barbara Novak, Peter MacMannus. 279 00:20:39,260 --> 00:20:41,750 Nice to meet you, Mr. MacMannus. 280 00:20:41,830 --> 00:20:45,290 - [ Vikki ] where's Mr. Block? - Yes, where's Mr. Block? 281 00:20:45,370 --> 00:20:48,860 I, uh, I don't know. Henri. 282 00:20:48,940 --> 00:20:51,670 - Where is Mr. Block? - I don't know. 283 00:20:51,740 --> 00:20:54,640 A Mr. Block for you, Mr. MacMannus? 284 00:20:54,710 --> 00:20:56,680 Ah. 285 00:20:56,740 --> 00:20:58,680 Here he is now. 286 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:04,110 - Catcher! - Mac. 287 00:21:04,180 --> 00:21:07,980 - Where are ya? - Something sprang up. Is she there? 288 00:21:08,060 --> 00:21:11,460 - Yes, she is. - Let me speak to the spinster. 289 00:21:11,530 --> 00:21:14,690 Mr. Block would like to speak with you. 290 00:21:18,670 --> 00:21:21,530 - This is Barbara Novak. - I'm so sorry, Miss Novak. 291 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,540 The darndest thing. 292 00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:26,770 I was waiting for you at the bar, and a little English foxhound... 293 00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:30,140 walked right in, came up to me and started nuzzling me. 294 00:21:30,210 --> 00:21:33,200 She seemed so lost, and she didn't want to go with anyone else... 295 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,440 so I just had to take care of her. 296 00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:38,280 Mr. Block, that is so thoughtful. 297 00:21:38,350 --> 00:21:41,410 I remember reading that the true test of a man's character... 298 00:21:41,490 --> 00:21:43,980 is how he treats a defenseless creature. 299 00:21:44,060 --> 00:21:47,690 Tell me, Mr. Block, how is the little bitch now? 300 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,460 Well, I've got her all nestled in a box... 301 00:21:50,530 --> 00:21:54,130 but I don't think she'll be content until I'm holding her. 302 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,000 Miss Novak, could we rain check until dinner? 303 00:21:57,070 --> 00:21:59,130 Of course. 304 00:21:59,210 --> 00:22:02,200 Well, good-bye, Mr. Block. Until dinner. 305 00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,270 Good-bye. 306 00:22:05,450 --> 00:22:09,180 ♪♪[ Orchestra: Dramatic ] 307 00:22:22,100 --> 00:22:24,090 This is Barbara Novak. 308 00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:26,830 Miss Novak, I am so sorry. 309 00:22:26,900 --> 00:22:29,730 - The darndest thing. - Yes, Mr. Block? 310 00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:32,930 I'm out in the park with my little French poodle... 311 00:22:33,010 --> 00:22:36,940 and she's just not ready to go in yet, if you know what I mean. 312 00:22:37,010 --> 00:22:39,740 Oh, I do, but here's a little advice... 313 00:22:39,810 --> 00:22:41,910 from a farm girl to a city boy. 314 00:22:41,980 --> 00:22:45,540 You'll find that if you stick a little twig in her bottom... 315 00:22:45,620 --> 00:22:48,610 she'll remember why she went out with you in the first place. 316 00:22:48,690 --> 00:22:50,850 I'll keep that in mind. 317 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:52,920 Miss Novak, I hate to ask... 318 00:22:52,990 --> 00:22:55,460 but could we rain check until breakfast? 319 00:22:55,530 --> 00:22:58,190 Of course. Good-bye, Mr. Block. 320 00:22:58,270 --> 00:23:00,260 Until breakfast. 321 00:23:02,100 --> 00:23:05,440 - [ Bat Hitting Ball ] - [ Crowd Cheering ] 322 00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:08,370 I...just don't know. 323 00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,500 It's not like Catch to be late. 324 00:23:10,580 --> 00:23:13,810 No. He usually calls to cancel right on time. 325 00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:16,010 Oh, Barbara, I'm sure he'll call. 326 00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:19,110 I mean, come. 327 00:23:19,190 --> 00:23:22,120 Elkie and I missed you at lunch yesterday, Gwendolyn. 328 00:23:22,190 --> 00:23:25,090 Oh, I, uh, took in a matinee... 329 00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,090 with Catcher Block. 330 00:23:28,830 --> 00:23:30,760 Is that so? 331 00:23:30,830 --> 00:23:33,460 But Elkie and I missed you at dinner last night, Yvette. 332 00:23:33,530 --> 00:23:36,370 Oh, I took in a night game... with Catcher Block. 333 00:23:40,010 --> 00:23:43,470 - I told him I'd give up flying for him. - I did too.! 334 00:23:43,540 --> 00:23:46,840 - Now I wonder if he ever loved me. - I wonder if he even cared. 335 00:23:49,120 --> 00:23:51,140 [ Both ] I wonder what's keeping Elkie! 336 00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:03,530 This is Barbara Novak. 337 00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:06,760 I'm so sorry, Miss Novak. The darndest thing. 338 00:24:06,830 --> 00:24:10,960 I got waylaid by the sweetest Swedish lap hound, who kept me up half the night... 339 00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:13,670 and I'm afraid I'm still in bed. 340 00:24:13,740 --> 00:24:16,730 My! You do get waylaid. 341 00:24:16,810 --> 00:24:19,970 - Would you care for another beverage? - Yeah, sure. Thank you. 342 00:24:20,050 --> 00:24:24,250 - I beg your pardon? - I was saying thank you. You're very understanding. 343 00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:26,720 Could we rain check until lunch? 344 00:24:26,790 --> 00:24:28,950 Oh, Mr. Block. 345 00:24:29,020 --> 00:24:31,180 You can take your rain check... 346 00:24:31,260 --> 00:24:34,090 and as we say on the farm at harvest time... 347 00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,100 put it where the sun does not shine! 348 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,660 Miss Novak, if you're looking to get dinner, then just say so. 349 00:24:40,730 --> 00:24:44,530 [ Scoffing Laugh ] Mr. Block... 350 00:24:44,610 --> 00:24:46,770 I wouldn't meet with you... 351 00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:50,000 in a hundred years! 352 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:52,270 - Good-bye, Mr. Block... - [ Punching Sound ] 353 00:24:52,350 --> 00:24:54,840 forever! 354 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:57,610 [ Thunder Rumbling ] 355 00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:02,880 Mr. MacMannus, thank you for your trouble. 356 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,220 Not at all. 357 00:25:05,290 --> 00:25:08,390 Vikki, I'll call a taxi. 358 00:25:12,370 --> 00:25:15,340 - Guess this means we're through. - Oh, it's sad, isn't it? 359 00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:18,390 This is the first time I've had to eliminate having a future with a man... 360 00:25:18,470 --> 00:25:21,370 before we've even had a chance to have had a past. 361 00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:23,530 Good-bye, Mr. MacMannus. 362 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,280 - ♪♪[ Band ] - [ Peter ] It was nice while it lasted. 363 00:25:34,350 --> 00:25:38,550 I haven't had dinner and breakfast with the same woman since I had a nanny. 364 00:25:38,630 --> 00:25:41,620 I'm sorry, Peter, but Vikki is not the only girl for you. 365 00:25:41,700 --> 00:25:43,690 That's why I brought you here. 366 00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:46,670 You brought me here... because we're buddies, right? 367 00:25:46,730 --> 00:25:48,670 Bosom buddies. 368 00:25:48,740 --> 00:25:52,400 - [ Men whistling ] - ♪♪[ Continues ] 369 00:26:02,950 --> 00:26:05,040 Get a load of those rockets. 370 00:26:05,120 --> 00:26:08,880 - Here's to antigravity. - Stay with me, buddy. You'll get the spins. 371 00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:11,790 And whatever you do, don't close your eyes. 372 00:26:11,860 --> 00:26:14,620 Don't close your eyes. 373 00:26:14,900 --> 00:26:18,350 Open your eyes. Open your eyes. 374 00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:23,000 Ta-da! It's your book. 375 00:26:23,070 --> 00:26:26,370 On sale, Scribners, Fifth Avenue. 376 00:26:26,440 --> 00:26:28,430 One? 377 00:26:29,610 --> 00:26:31,600 Just one? 378 00:26:32,750 --> 00:26:36,310 All that work, and-and-and-and one? 379 00:26:36,380 --> 00:26:40,480 If somebody buys it, well, then there will be none. 380 00:26:40,550 --> 00:26:43,650 It will be as if it never even existed. 381 00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:47,220 No, no. Doubleday also has one. 382 00:26:47,290 --> 00:26:49,730 - [ Bell Dings ] - Mmm. 383 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:53,130 I know you're thinking this is a real setback, but I promise you... 384 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,190 I will think of something. 385 00:26:57,440 --> 00:27:01,710 If only we could get your book on The Ed Sullivan Show. 386 00:27:01,770 --> 00:27:04,040 Yeah. 387 00:27:04,110 --> 00:27:07,940 How exactly do you get a book on The Ed Sullivan Show? 388 00:27:09,350 --> 00:27:11,980 [ Barbara ] Vikki, you're incredible. 389 00:27:12,050 --> 00:27:15,110 She wasn't even on the bill. How did they fit her into the lineup? 390 00:27:15,190 --> 00:27:17,120 - [ Audience Applauding ] - Oh, the best luck. 391 00:27:17,190 --> 00:27:20,420 The Singing Nun fell off her scooter coming across the Triborough Bridge. 392 00:27:20,490 --> 00:27:22,390 I guess somebody up there likes me. 393 00:27:22,460 --> 00:27:25,790 [ Ed Sullivan ] we have for you a really big surprise... 394 00:27:25,860 --> 00:27:29,360 because to coincide with the arrival of the new book... 395 00:27:29,430 --> 00:27:31,830 Down with Love... 396 00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:35,570 which this week is at your booksellers from coast to coast... 397 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:39,470 we have a very, very special friend of our show... 398 00:27:39,540 --> 00:27:41,940 to do a song of that book. 399 00:27:42,010 --> 00:27:45,140 Now, I want a really big, warm welcome... 400 00:27:45,220 --> 00:27:47,380 forJudy Garland... 401 00:27:47,450 --> 00:27:49,390 right on this stage. 402 00:27:49,450 --> 00:27:53,250 ♪♪ [ Band ] 403 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,790 Yes, ma'am. Down with Love by Barbara Novak. 404 00:28:37,870 --> 00:28:40,460 It's called Down with Love by Barbara Novak. 405 00:29:00,160 --> 00:29:02,920 - [ Laughing ] - Yes! 406 00:29:19,380 --> 00:29:22,110 [ Bicycle Bells Dinging ] 407 00:29:50,140 --> 00:29:52,800 [ All Screaming ] 408 00:30:09,160 --> 00:30:12,690 [ Screaming ] 409 00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:14,700 [ Gigging, Squealing ] 410 00:30:15,770 --> 00:30:18,670 [ Applause ] 411 00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:41,520 You said she was a spinster. 412 00:30:41,590 --> 00:30:44,260 I've never used the word "spinster" in my life. 413 00:30:44,330 --> 00:30:47,960 Okay, once, when I told my mother it was technically incorrect to call her son a spinster. 414 00:30:48,030 --> 00:30:50,500 - You said she was a brunette. - I did not! 415 00:30:50,570 --> 00:30:53,090 She sure didn't sound like a blond on the telephone. 416 00:30:53,170 --> 00:30:56,660 - You still want to date Vikki? - Of course. You think I want to die a spinster? 417 00:30:56,740 --> 00:31:00,640 - Tell her I'll do the cover story. - You are the best friend-- 418 00:31:00,710 --> 00:31:03,810 Just... call. 419 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:08,340 [ Man ] Not sinceJohannes Gutenberg's invention of the printing press... 420 00:31:08,420 --> 00:31:12,410 which changed forever the landscape of man's destiny... 421 00:31:12,490 --> 00:31:16,390 has one book reached so many and achieved so much... 422 00:31:16,460 --> 00:31:18,860 reminding all of us here today... 423 00:31:18,930 --> 00:31:23,060 of the noble goal which called us to toil in the field of publishing... 424 00:31:23,130 --> 00:31:25,400 to begin with-- 425 00:31:25,470 --> 00:31:27,400 sales. 426 00:31:27,470 --> 00:31:31,600 So here's to Banner House's new number-one author... 427 00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:35,340 and our new number-one editor. 428 00:31:35,410 --> 00:31:37,350 Say cheers, everyone. 429 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,420 [ All ] Cheers. 430 00:31:40,490 --> 00:31:42,980 Those men are livid, B.N. 431 00:31:43,050 --> 00:31:45,550 You're a hit. You're bigger than the pill. 432 00:31:45,620 --> 00:31:48,250 Oh, talk about big, V.H. 433 00:31:48,330 --> 00:31:51,490 This office is huge. Congratulations. 434 00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:53,500 We did it. 435 00:31:53,570 --> 00:31:58,030 Well, hello, Gladys! You look wonderful. 436 00:31:58,100 --> 00:32:01,730 As you told me, Barbara, it's never too late. [ Giggles ] 437 00:32:01,810 --> 00:32:03,930 Oh, Vikki, Peter MacMannus called again. 438 00:32:04,010 --> 00:32:06,000 Now it's every half hour. 439 00:32:07,650 --> 00:32:09,700 [ Both ] Tell him we're too busy. 440 00:32:09,780 --> 00:32:14,050 - What do you mean? "Too busy"? - You know what it means. 441 00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:16,350 [ Peter] They hate us. 442 00:32:16,420 --> 00:32:18,410 Too busy? 443 00:32:18,490 --> 00:32:21,930 Kennedy, Khrushchev and Castro weren't too busy during the Cuban Missile Crisis... 444 00:32:21,990 --> 00:32:23,930 to sit down and talk to me... 445 00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:27,020 but this Down with Love chick is too busy. 446 00:32:27,100 --> 00:32:29,790 Doing what? Eating chocolate? 447 00:32:29,870 --> 00:32:32,630 [ Man On TV] I'm sorry, panel. You've been stumped. 448 00:32:32,700 --> 00:32:36,160 - The author of the best seller, Down with Love... - It's Novak! 449 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,770 - Barbara Novak. - [ Audience Applauding ] 450 00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:41,400 Barbara, I know every woman bought your book... 451 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:45,710 and every man sneaked out and bought it to find out what their women were reading. 452 00:32:45,780 --> 00:32:47,910 - That's when the sales doubled. - [ Laughing ] 453 00:32:47,990 --> 00:32:50,420 [ Man ] But then they tripled. How did that happen? 454 00:32:50,490 --> 00:32:54,390 It seems that church groups in the Bible belt were so zealous... 455 00:32:54,460 --> 00:32:57,550 about being seen burning my book... 456 00:32:57,630 --> 00:33:00,620 that every time they had a bonfire, they would call and reorder... 457 00:33:00,700 --> 00:33:03,530 so that they could have another one. 458 00:33:06,540 --> 00:33:09,270 Now, I've heard a lot of talk about chapter eight... 459 00:33:09,340 --> 00:33:12,310 about the worst kind of man, the kind every woman should avoid. 460 00:33:12,380 --> 00:33:13,870 What's that title again? 461 00:33:13,950 --> 00:33:18,410 "Men who change women as often as they change their shirts." 462 00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:21,920 [ Man ] And have you met a lot of that kind of man in your research? 463 00:33:21,990 --> 00:33:25,550 [ Chuckles ] You're not asking me to name names, are you? 464 00:33:25,620 --> 00:33:28,460 - No, of course not. - [ Barbara Laughing ] 465 00:33:28,530 --> 00:33:31,090 Catcher Block. 466 00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:33,720 [ Audience ] Ohh.! 467 00:33:38,740 --> 00:33:41,800 Wow! 468 00:33:41,870 --> 00:33:44,240 Four million women in the naked city... 469 00:33:44,310 --> 00:33:48,910 and the one you let get away, the one you had to get on the bad side of... 470 00:33:48,980 --> 00:33:53,750 is the woman all the other four million are listening to. 471 00:33:53,820 --> 00:33:56,120 [ Snickering Laugh ] 472 00:33:56,190 --> 00:33:58,780 You blew it, buddy. 473 00:33:58,860 --> 00:34:02,310 The age of Catcher Block, ladies' man, man's man, man about town... 474 00:34:02,390 --> 00:34:04,330 is over! 475 00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,450 The king is dead. 476 00:34:06,530 --> 00:34:10,230 I hate to spoil your fun, but the four million women I go out with... 477 00:34:10,300 --> 00:34:12,600 don't listen to Barbara Novak. 478 00:34:12,670 --> 00:34:15,230 [ Phone Ringing ] 479 00:34:16,310 --> 00:34:18,400 Hello. 480 00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:22,610 Hey, Gwendolyn, baby. Where are you? 481 00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:26,010 Then get out of the airport. We have reservations for 10:00. 482 00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:29,520 Well, you can't sit in the terminal till 3:00 a.m. 483 00:34:29,590 --> 00:34:31,520 Aren't you going to get hungry? 484 00:34:31,590 --> 00:34:33,520 No, I'm pretty full. 485 00:34:33,590 --> 00:34:36,790 Besides, I have to... catch up on some reading. 486 00:34:36,860 --> 00:34:40,320 Reading? Reading what? 487 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:45,890 Good night, Gwendolyn. 488 00:34:50,840 --> 00:34:55,240 What's the matter, Catch? Lose another one? 489 00:34:55,380 --> 00:34:58,740 I am going to bury that Novak broad... 490 00:34:58,810 --> 00:35:02,810 and turn this crazy upside Down with Love world right side up again. 491 00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:05,380 I'm gonna write the exposé of the century... 492 00:35:05,450 --> 00:35:09,190 so the world will know once and for all that deep down all women are the same. 493 00:35:09,260 --> 00:35:11,950 They all want the same thing-- love and marriage... 494 00:35:12,030 --> 00:35:14,790 even Miss Barbara "Down with Love" Novak. 495 00:35:14,860 --> 00:35:17,130 And I am going to prove it. 496 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:19,830 How? Novak won't even see you. 497 00:35:19,900 --> 00:35:21,960 That's right. 498 00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:25,130 That's why Novak won't even see me coming. 499 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:35,510 Barbara, you're not dressed. Aren't you coming? 500 00:35:35,580 --> 00:35:38,250 No. I'm just gonna stay in tonight. 501 00:35:38,320 --> 00:35:40,310 Why? Because you don't have a date? 502 00:35:40,390 --> 00:35:43,850 My date's a quarterback with 27 teammates. I'm sure he can fix you up. 503 00:35:43,930 --> 00:35:45,860 I'm sure he couldn't. 504 00:35:45,930 --> 00:35:49,560 I am persona non grata to all men. 505 00:35:49,630 --> 00:35:53,230 I can't even get picked up by a taxi driver. 506 00:35:53,300 --> 00:35:56,290 This is crazy. All of this fame and success... 507 00:35:56,370 --> 00:36:00,500 and Miss Sex Á La Carte is the only woman who can't have sex à la carte. 508 00:36:00,580 --> 00:36:02,570 At least not on this Earth. 509 00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:06,340 Maybe we could find you an astronaut who's been in orbit the past two weeks. 510 00:36:06,420 --> 00:36:09,110 It's all right, Vikki. I'm perfectly content on my own. 511 00:36:09,180 --> 00:36:13,520 When it comes to not needing a man, you wrote the book. 512 00:36:15,060 --> 00:36:17,050 [ Door Closes ] 513 00:36:36,210 --> 00:36:39,150 - Taxi! - Wait. I have to pick up my dry cleaning. 514 00:36:39,210 --> 00:36:41,210 Can't. Gotta get back to the office. 515 00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:43,770 Skip in Research is doing a fact check on Novak-- 516 00:36:43,850 --> 00:36:47,120 who she knows, where she goes, what she likes for dinner, what she likes à la carte. 517 00:36:47,190 --> 00:36:50,780 Wh-- Two minutes. I waited for you to eat your hot dog. 518 00:36:50,860 --> 00:36:55,460 You're right, Mac. I'll pick up your cleaning. You go back to the office. 519 00:36:55,530 --> 00:36:58,470 Oh, but I-- Oh! Ow! 520 00:36:59,670 --> 00:37:03,260 Oh! Make sure they starched the socks! 521 00:37:17,850 --> 00:37:19,840 [ Bell Ringing ] 522 00:37:21,890 --> 00:37:24,150 [ Dinging ] 523 00:37:24,230 --> 00:37:26,890 I'm getting it. You iron. 524 00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,130 No, you iron, and I'll spend all day up front... 525 00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:32,130 kibitzing with the customers. 526 00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:34,690 We're equal now. 527 00:37:34,770 --> 00:37:36,830 Again with that book. 528 00:37:42,980 --> 00:37:45,240 [ Bell Ringing ] 529 00:37:45,310 --> 00:37:47,870 Hello, "Novick"! 530 00:37:47,950 --> 00:37:50,280 Hello, Mrs. Litzer. 531 00:37:50,350 --> 00:37:52,290 Where's Mr. Litzer? 532 00:37:52,350 --> 00:37:54,480 He's ironing. 533 00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:58,360 Irving, say hello to "Novick"! 534 00:37:58,430 --> 00:38:00,690 Hello, "Novick." 535 00:38:00,760 --> 00:38:03,390 I'll get your things, dear. 536 00:38:03,470 --> 00:38:06,560 Thank you. 537 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:08,630 Yours too, mister. 538 00:38:17,610 --> 00:38:20,600 [ Southern Accent ] Pardon me, miss, but you sure look familiar. 539 00:38:20,680 --> 00:38:22,950 - Are you-- - Yes, I am. 540 00:38:23,020 --> 00:38:25,010 Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. 541 00:38:25,090 --> 00:38:29,350 Wait till I tell folks back home I took my clothes to the same dry cleaners... 542 00:38:29,420 --> 00:38:31,450 as Miss Kim "Novick." 543 00:38:31,530 --> 00:38:33,990 No, my name is Novak. 544 00:38:34,060 --> 00:38:36,900 Oh, that's right. Miss Kim Novak. 545 00:38:36,970 --> 00:38:41,230 No, no, um, I'm not Kim Novak. I'm Barbara Novak. 546 00:38:41,300 --> 00:38:45,000 Oh. Well, that don't ring a bell. 547 00:38:47,340 --> 00:38:51,540 - You mean, you've never heard of me? - Oh, I'm sorry. 548 00:38:51,610 --> 00:38:55,880 No. No, don't be. I find it very refreshing. 549 00:38:55,950 --> 00:38:59,350 You-- Mr. Absentminded Professor. 550 00:38:59,420 --> 00:39:01,980 You left a lot of things in your pocket. 551 00:39:02,060 --> 00:39:04,530 Why, thank you, ma'am. 552 00:39:05,830 --> 00:39:07,990 Excuse me. I'm sorry. 553 00:39:08,060 --> 00:39:11,430 Do you mean that you've never heard of my book... 554 00:39:11,500 --> 00:39:14,090 the worldwide sensation Down with Love? 555 00:39:14,170 --> 00:39:16,930 No, ma'am. I have not. 556 00:39:17,010 --> 00:39:20,440 But lately I've been out of this world. 557 00:39:20,510 --> 00:39:22,700 Oh, look. My NASA security badge. 558 00:39:22,780 --> 00:39:26,010 I've been looking all over for that. 559 00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:29,310 - You're an astronaut? - Why, yes, I am. 560 00:39:29,380 --> 00:39:32,550 Well, what's your name? Maybe I've heard of you. 561 00:39:34,060 --> 00:39:37,290 - Zip. - Zip-- 562 00:39:39,900 --> 00:39:42,590 Martin. Major Zip Martin. 563 00:39:42,660 --> 00:39:46,000 Well, tell me, Major... 564 00:39:46,070 --> 00:39:50,730 are those parties in Cocoa Beach as wild and uncivilized as they seem? 565 00:39:50,810 --> 00:39:54,470 Oh, I couldn't say, ma'am. I'm not much for going to parties. 566 00:39:54,540 --> 00:39:56,940 My idea of a good time... 567 00:39:57,010 --> 00:40:00,640 is to sit at home with a good book... 568 00:40:00,720 --> 00:40:03,120 and smoke my pipe. 569 00:40:03,180 --> 00:40:07,990 Pay later. Irving's burning the ironing. 570 00:40:08,060 --> 00:40:10,520 Pardon me, miss. 571 00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:18,360 - Oh! We're stuck together. - We're-- 572 00:40:18,430 --> 00:40:20,590 Let me fix that. 573 00:40:24,770 --> 00:40:27,110 There you go, Miss Novak. 574 00:40:35,180 --> 00:40:36,810 Well... 575 00:40:38,620 --> 00:40:40,280 good-bye. 576 00:40:41,990 --> 00:40:44,820 One, two, three, four. 577 00:40:44,890 --> 00:40:46,830 Zip! 578 00:40:46,900 --> 00:40:48,890 Yes, Miss Novak? 579 00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:52,900 Well, I don't suppose that you're staying in New York. 580 00:40:52,970 --> 00:40:55,060 Why, yes, I am. 581 00:40:55,140 --> 00:40:58,000 NASA sent me here to work on a special project. 582 00:40:58,070 --> 00:41:00,010 Top-secret project. 583 00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:02,740 Oh? 584 00:41:02,810 --> 00:41:06,140 - Can you keep a secret? - Yes. 585 00:41:06,210 --> 00:41:10,740 Me too. Gee, it sure seems like we got a lot in common. 586 00:41:10,820 --> 00:41:14,080 Why, yes, it does. 587 00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:17,990 It might be nice to see just what we have in common... 588 00:41:18,060 --> 00:41:21,090 and what we have that's different. 589 00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,430 I'm sorry? 590 00:41:23,500 --> 00:41:27,090 Would you like to go to my place and get to know each other... 591 00:41:27,170 --> 00:41:29,100 a little better? 592 00:41:29,170 --> 00:41:32,000 - A little better? - Lot better. 593 00:41:32,070 --> 00:41:36,240 - A lot better than what? - All the way better. 594 00:41:36,310 --> 00:41:38,250 Oh, gee, no. 595 00:41:38,310 --> 00:41:41,580 Now, I couldn't do that. 596 00:41:41,650 --> 00:41:44,850 Why, I couldn't get to know you all the way better... 597 00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:47,750 until I knew you much, much better. 598 00:41:47,820 --> 00:41:50,950 Do you think that you know me well enough... 599 00:41:51,030 --> 00:41:53,020 to let me buy you a drink? 600 00:41:53,090 --> 00:41:56,260 Well... 601 00:41:56,330 --> 00:41:59,030 I'd sure love a Tang. 602 00:42:08,310 --> 00:42:10,240 Lose another pair of glasses? 603 00:42:10,310 --> 00:42:12,250 No, I'm keeping a low profile. 604 00:42:12,310 --> 00:42:15,770 - Vikki's over there with some guy. - That's not some guy. 605 00:42:15,850 --> 00:42:18,380 That's Johnny Trementus, the quarterback. 606 00:42:18,450 --> 00:42:22,320 - 1,432 complete passes. - Is he going for 1,433? 607 00:42:22,390 --> 00:42:25,830 Well, Vikki's left herself wide open... 608 00:42:25,890 --> 00:42:27,990 but Trementus surprisingly fumbles. 609 00:42:28,060 --> 00:42:30,930 Now what's he doing-- in laymen's terms? 610 00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,630 - He's leaving. Now's your chance. - I can't go over there. 611 00:42:33,700 --> 00:42:36,540 - She hates me. - She doesn't hate you. She hates me. 612 00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:39,840 Stop warming the bench and get in the game. 613 00:42:39,910 --> 00:42:43,400 Once you run my Novak exposé, she will hate you, and the clock will have run out. 614 00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:46,970 - Can't you get off your Novak warpath? - Nope. 615 00:42:47,050 --> 00:42:51,280 I've got her surrounded, and it won't take a surprise attack to enter her teepee. 616 00:42:51,350 --> 00:42:55,950 I'm telling you, Kemosabe, you want big wampum, make Vikki love you now. 617 00:42:56,020 --> 00:42:59,520 Okay, enough with the football talk! I'm going. 618 00:43:00,530 --> 00:43:02,460 [ Clears Throat ] 619 00:43:03,570 --> 00:43:06,250 - There you are, Monsieur Block. - Ah, thanks, Henri. 620 00:43:06,330 --> 00:43:10,100 Only, from now on it's... Major Zip Martin. 621 00:43:10,170 --> 00:43:12,660 - Ah. - Spread the word to the other maître d's... 622 00:43:12,740 --> 00:43:15,540 the doorman, theater ushers and taxi drivers. 623 00:43:15,610 --> 00:43:18,340 Oui, oui. Done. 624 00:43:18,410 --> 00:43:21,470 Uh... Major. 625 00:43:21,550 --> 00:43:24,540 It'll be all right, MacMannus. Just be normal. 626 00:43:24,620 --> 00:43:26,610 Be cool. 627 00:43:29,690 --> 00:43:32,990 Hello... Vikki. 628 00:43:33,060 --> 00:43:35,050 Hello, Peter. 629 00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,490 [ Voice Breaking ] Are you in love with that football player? 630 00:43:43,570 --> 00:43:45,560 Not anymore. 631 00:43:45,640 --> 00:43:49,940 He only wanted one thing-- to slip me his manuscript. 632 00:43:50,010 --> 00:43:53,670 He didn't even have the professional courtesy to try and seduce me first. 633 00:43:53,750 --> 00:43:56,510 The men who resent my success won't give me the time of day. 634 00:43:56,580 --> 00:44:00,750 And the men who respect my success won't give me the time of night. 635 00:44:00,820 --> 00:44:03,380 I don't know about other men, but I swear... 636 00:44:03,460 --> 00:44:08,360 if I had the chance, I would respect and resent you night and day, day and night. 637 00:44:08,430 --> 00:44:10,760 - Peter, you would? - You bet. 638 00:44:10,830 --> 00:44:12,820 You're on. 639 00:44:17,470 --> 00:44:20,630 - Oh, Zip, isn't this exciting? - [ Orchestra Tuning Up ] 640 00:44:20,710 --> 00:44:24,700 We must be the only two people in New York who haven't seen Camelot yet. 641 00:44:24,780 --> 00:44:27,110 - [ Audience Applauding ] - You're not just being nice. 642 00:44:27,180 --> 00:44:29,110 You really haven't seen it either? 643 00:44:29,180 --> 00:44:32,880 Oh, I can honestly say I have never seen this show. 644 00:44:32,950 --> 00:44:36,220 ♪♪[ Orchestra: Dramatic ] 645 00:44:56,010 --> 00:44:58,170 [ People Laughing ] 646 00:45:36,780 --> 00:45:39,910 [ People Shouting ] 647 00:45:41,190 --> 00:45:43,120 [ Bell Dinging ] 648 00:45:43,190 --> 00:45:45,680 [ Bat Hitting Ball ] 649 00:46:01,740 --> 00:46:03,670 - [ Intercom Buzzes ] - [ woman ] Mr. Block? 650 00:46:03,740 --> 00:46:06,680 - Mr. McNulty to see you. - Send him in. 651 00:46:09,210 --> 00:46:12,950 McNulty, good. Look, this should cover your up-front expenses. 652 00:46:13,020 --> 00:46:16,010 Go up to Maine, get me all the dirt on Novak. 653 00:46:16,090 --> 00:46:19,420 No girl like that would swear off love just to get ahead in the workforce. 654 00:46:19,490 --> 00:46:21,980 Somewhere, some time, some guy hurt her. 655 00:46:22,060 --> 00:46:25,860 I need to find him so I can prove I'm right and nail my exposé. 656 00:46:25,930 --> 00:46:29,260 Gladly. That broad's book is bad for business. 657 00:46:29,340 --> 00:46:31,830 Husbands don't want their wives tailed anymore. 658 00:46:31,900 --> 00:46:34,840 They know if she's sneaking out now, she's just looking for a job. 659 00:46:34,910 --> 00:46:36,810 [ Phone Rings ] 660 00:46:36,940 --> 00:46:39,140 Hello. Mac. 661 00:46:39,210 --> 00:46:42,150 Mac. Mac, calm down. 662 00:46:42,210 --> 00:46:45,510 Ma-- Okay, I'll be right over. 663 00:46:45,580 --> 00:46:48,180 Quick, taste my sauce. Too tart? 664 00:46:48,250 --> 00:46:51,420 - This is your big emergency? - Yes! 665 00:46:51,490 --> 00:46:53,480 I invited Vikki to dinner. 666 00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:57,430 It has to be perfect so she'll find me irresistible and I can make my big move. 667 00:46:57,500 --> 00:47:00,660 You could have made your big move three weeks ago. I keep telling you. 668 00:47:00,730 --> 00:47:03,900 That's these Down with Love girls' claim to fame-- 669 00:47:03,970 --> 00:47:05,900 one date, no waiting. 670 00:47:05,970 --> 00:47:10,100 These Down with Love girls may be used to having sex the way a man does, but I'm not. 671 00:47:10,180 --> 00:47:12,110 Too sweet? 672 00:47:14,250 --> 00:47:18,580 So I guess you and Novak have been very "down with love." 673 00:47:18,650 --> 00:47:22,850 I mean, you've had what-- 29 dates in 23 days? 674 00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:25,910 Yeah, but I'm trying to get her not to want to have sex with me. 675 00:47:25,990 --> 00:47:28,860 These days you've really got to play your cards right to get a girl to say no. 676 00:47:28,930 --> 00:47:31,560 Or maybe you just like spending time with her. 677 00:47:31,630 --> 00:47:35,730 Maybe the necessity of all this chastity and monogamy... 678 00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:39,570 has made you realize that Barbara Novak is your ideal potential lover. 679 00:47:39,640 --> 00:47:42,610 Come back to Earth, buddy boy. Your cake's burning. 680 00:47:42,670 --> 00:47:45,540 - [ Alarm Buzzing ] - [ Gasps ] 681 00:47:49,280 --> 00:47:52,270 So this is how a guy like you does it, huh? 682 00:47:52,350 --> 00:47:55,290 No, I don't do it, but if I did do it, I'd do what I'm doing. 683 00:47:55,350 --> 00:47:57,320 Which reminds me of something I didn't do. 684 00:47:57,390 --> 00:48:01,090 - I have to call Vikki and give her my address. - I've got a better idea. 685 00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:05,760 Invite Vikki to my place, make like it's yours. You know where I keep the spare key. 686 00:48:05,830 --> 00:48:08,800 You'd let me use the key you leave out for your girlfriends? 687 00:48:08,870 --> 00:48:10,800 Somebody might as well. 688 00:48:10,870 --> 00:48:13,860 It's gathering dust since Novak hit the best-seller list. 689 00:48:13,940 --> 00:48:17,430 - But I invited Vikki for a home-cooked meal. - Trust me. 690 00:48:17,510 --> 00:48:22,000 Ten minutes in my apartment, and you'll both forget all about dinner. 691 00:48:23,180 --> 00:48:25,210 Ten minutes? 692 00:48:25,280 --> 00:48:27,980 Ten minutes. 693 00:48:28,050 --> 00:48:30,820 [ Phone Rings ] 694 00:48:33,590 --> 00:48:36,250 [ Rings ] 695 00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:42,800 [ Rings ] 696 00:48:42,870 --> 00:48:45,560 - Hello. - Hello, Barbara. It's Zip. 697 00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:47,570 Hello, Zip. 698 00:48:47,640 --> 00:48:51,580 I was wondering if I could ask you to do me a very special favor. 699 00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:53,770 Sure, Zip. Anything. 700 00:48:53,850 --> 00:48:56,820 Well, I know we planned to go out, but... 701 00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:59,370 - well, I thought it might be fun to stay in. - [ Exhaling ] 702 00:48:59,450 --> 00:49:02,610 I'm in the mood for a home-cooked meal. 703 00:49:02,690 --> 00:49:06,950 Major Martin, I have no desire to stay cooped up in the kitchen... 704 00:49:07,030 --> 00:49:10,980 slaving over a hot stove and a sink full of dirty dishes. 705 00:49:11,060 --> 00:49:14,970 Oh, no, Barbara. You misunderstood. 706 00:49:15,030 --> 00:49:17,630 When I said a home-cooked meal... 707 00:49:17,700 --> 00:49:22,160 I meant at my place-- I wanted to serve you. 708 00:49:22,240 --> 00:49:25,210 Oh, Zip. 709 00:49:25,280 --> 00:49:28,010 No man has ever done this for me before. 710 00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:30,570 How thoughtful. 711 00:49:30,650 --> 00:49:33,480 - Well. - And considerate. 712 00:49:33,550 --> 00:49:35,490 It's my pleasure. 713 00:49:35,550 --> 00:49:39,460 Oh, no, no, no. It's mine. 714 00:49:39,530 --> 00:49:43,150 - So, you'd like to come? - Oh, yes. 715 00:49:43,230 --> 00:49:46,360 Yes. Yes. 716 00:49:46,430 --> 00:49:48,990 I can't wait. 717 00:49:49,070 --> 00:49:51,060 [ Sighs ] 718 00:49:53,470 --> 00:49:55,960 Seventy-third and Park. And Barbara? 719 00:49:56,040 --> 00:50:00,710 - Yes, Zip? - Thank you for being so flexible. 720 00:50:00,780 --> 00:50:03,540 No, Zip. Thank you. 721 00:50:21,630 --> 00:50:24,400 Oh, Zip! 722 00:50:24,470 --> 00:50:27,460 Everything looks divine. 723 00:50:29,170 --> 00:50:31,670 I have a funny feeling that you've done... 724 00:50:31,740 --> 00:50:34,580 quite a bit of entertaining for two here. 725 00:50:34,650 --> 00:50:37,620 Oh, I can honestly say that until you... 726 00:50:37,680 --> 00:50:41,410 I haven't done any entertaining for two here at all. 727 00:50:41,490 --> 00:50:43,980 You're certainly not the average astronaut. 728 00:50:44,060 --> 00:50:48,120 Oh, I get so tired of all that freeze-dried food. 729 00:50:48,190 --> 00:50:50,860 After a steady diet of pellet steak... 730 00:50:50,930 --> 00:50:52,860 and potato tablets... 731 00:50:52,930 --> 00:50:56,920 you yearn for something hot to sink your teeth into. 732 00:51:01,140 --> 00:51:04,130 Well, you've whetted my appetite. 733 00:51:05,540 --> 00:51:08,210 It's not just your cooking. 734 00:51:10,220 --> 00:51:12,840 You are so well-rounded. 735 00:51:14,050 --> 00:51:18,280 Your collection of art and antiques. 736 00:51:18,360 --> 00:51:20,830 You've made a real home here. 737 00:51:20,890 --> 00:51:24,490 Well, Earth still is my favorite planet. 738 00:51:24,560 --> 00:51:27,430 No, I meant here, in New York. 739 00:51:27,500 --> 00:51:29,430 Oh. 740 00:51:29,500 --> 00:51:32,800 Most bachelors in this city are only interested in an apartment... 741 00:51:32,870 --> 00:51:35,860 that comes fully loaded with every gadget and contraption... 742 00:51:35,940 --> 00:51:39,610 man has invented to snare a woman. 743 00:51:41,810 --> 00:51:46,080 I don't understand this, Peter. How does a person lose their built-in bar? 744 00:51:46,150 --> 00:51:50,410 [ Chuckles ] I swear, it was here a minute ago. 745 00:51:52,250 --> 00:51:55,380 - [ Mechanical Whirring ] - Ohh! 746 00:51:55,460 --> 00:51:58,430 [ Gasps ] 747 00:52:02,530 --> 00:52:05,090 [ Whirring ] 748 00:52:05,170 --> 00:52:09,000 Hey. Found it. Vikki? 749 00:52:09,070 --> 00:52:12,270 Where are you? 750 00:52:12,340 --> 00:52:16,900 - [ Vikki ] I don't know. - [ Shrieks ] 751 00:52:18,310 --> 00:52:20,870 Oh. 752 00:52:23,450 --> 00:52:27,750 Peter, your couch was all over me like some animal. 753 00:52:27,820 --> 00:52:31,760 - Who knew you were so dangerous? - I'm sorry. 754 00:52:31,830 --> 00:52:35,020 Uh, I know I seem a little disoriented. 755 00:52:35,100 --> 00:52:38,120 Guess I tasted too much sherry while I was cooking. 756 00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:42,260 You cooked for me? No man has ever done that for me before. 757 00:52:42,340 --> 00:52:44,770 I'm famished. 758 00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:48,240 Actually, I didn't cook... here... 759 00:52:48,310 --> 00:52:50,900 at my apartment... for us. 760 00:52:50,980 --> 00:52:55,970 I cooked... at Catch's apartment for... Catch. 761 00:52:56,050 --> 00:53:00,080 - Oh. - But you've only been here a minute. 762 00:53:00,160 --> 00:53:03,850 Let's make it 10 and see if we forget all about dinner. 763 00:53:09,170 --> 00:53:12,130 - [ Vikki ] Are those your parents? - No. Those are Catch's parents. 764 00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:15,470 Why do you have a picture of Catch's parents? 765 00:53:16,510 --> 00:53:19,740 Let's listen to some music. 766 00:53:27,980 --> 00:53:30,820 [ Whirring ] 767 00:53:33,690 --> 00:53:38,420 ♪♪[ Stereo: "1812 Overture" At Full Volume ] 768 00:53:39,430 --> 00:53:41,760 ♪♪[ Continues ] 769 00:53:41,830 --> 00:53:44,490 It's all right. It's all right. 770 00:53:44,570 --> 00:53:47,330 [ Both ] Ooh! 771 00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:49,600 - [ Slingshot Sound ] - Ooh! 772 00:53:51,270 --> 00:53:53,710 [ Both Gasp ] 773 00:53:53,780 --> 00:53:56,610 Ooh! 774 00:53:56,680 --> 00:54:00,710 I can't do this for eight more minutes. Let's go eat. 775 00:54:00,780 --> 00:54:03,680 - [ Vikki Screeches ] - ♪♪["1812 Overture" Ends ] 776 00:54:07,820 --> 00:54:11,020 - [ Catcher ] How's that? - [ Barbara ] Oh. 777 00:54:11,090 --> 00:54:14,150 [ Catcher ] You tell me when it's good for you. 778 00:54:14,230 --> 00:54:18,790 Put your hand on it and guide me till I got it in the right spot. 779 00:54:18,870 --> 00:54:22,670 [ Barbara ] Almost. Almost. 780 00:54:22,740 --> 00:54:24,830 Oh, Zip. 781 00:54:24,910 --> 00:54:30,440 I've done this a lot before, of course, but never with such a powerful instrument. 782 00:54:30,510 --> 00:54:35,310 [ Barbara Gasps ] That's it. 783 00:54:35,380 --> 00:54:39,410 It's perfectly clear. 784 00:54:42,530 --> 00:54:46,660 Oh, Zip, I've never seen anything so beautiful... 785 00:54:46,730 --> 00:54:48,890 in all my life. 786 00:54:48,960 --> 00:54:53,400 - Neither have I. - You're not even looking through the telescope. 787 00:54:53,470 --> 00:54:55,940 I know. 788 00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:18,020 This chocolate soufflé is delicious, Zip. 789 00:55:18,090 --> 00:55:20,790 You've really outdone yourself. 790 00:55:20,860 --> 00:55:24,060 - I wanted the perfect end to the perfect evening. - Mm. 791 00:55:24,130 --> 00:55:27,500 I've never been more ready to go to bed. 792 00:55:27,570 --> 00:55:32,170 Oh, Zip, I'm so glad that you feel that way. 793 00:55:32,240 --> 00:55:36,540 - You know that I feel the same way? - Well, then, let's get to bed. 794 00:55:36,610 --> 00:55:40,450 - [ Inhales Deeply ] - I'll call you a taxi. 795 00:55:42,320 --> 00:55:46,190 - Taxi? - [ Dial Tone ] 796 00:55:46,260 --> 00:55:52,130 Oh, when I said bed, you thought I meant bed. 797 00:55:52,190 --> 00:55:55,130 Oh, Barbara, I'm so sorry. 798 00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:58,170 This is only the first time you've ever been to my home, and where I come from-- 799 00:55:58,230 --> 00:56:02,070 It's all right, Zip. 800 00:56:02,140 --> 00:56:06,570 It's all right. Um, it's better this way. 801 00:56:08,210 --> 00:56:12,580 Let's, um-- Let's just say good night... 802 00:56:14,480 --> 00:56:16,850 and good-bye. 803 00:56:16,920 --> 00:56:20,290 - Good-bye? You mean for good? - I'm afraid so, Zip. 804 00:56:20,360 --> 00:56:23,260 You see, I'm beginning to feel-- 805 00:56:23,330 --> 00:56:26,260 Well, I'm beginning to feel. 806 00:56:26,330 --> 00:56:30,160 Well, couldn't you give me just one more chance? 807 00:56:30,230 --> 00:56:34,230 Oh, I'd like to, Zip, really, I would... 808 00:56:34,300 --> 00:56:37,270 but just the fact that I'd like to give you another chance... 809 00:56:37,340 --> 00:56:41,500 is the very reason why I absolutely must not. 810 00:57:14,180 --> 00:57:17,200 Okay. One more chance. 811 00:57:20,220 --> 00:57:24,620 [ Clears Throat ] I'll just, um-- 812 00:57:24,690 --> 00:57:27,380 Hmm. 813 00:58:00,860 --> 00:58:04,120 [ Laughter, Chattering ] 814 00:58:11,700 --> 00:58:14,640 [ Chattering Continues ] 815 00:58:35,290 --> 00:58:38,420 - Peter? - You rang? 816 00:58:38,490 --> 00:58:41,460 No. I used my key, Maynard. How did everyone else get in here? 817 00:58:41,530 --> 00:58:44,970 I took Vikki down to the Village for a demi-tasse. Crazy! 818 00:58:45,030 --> 00:58:48,730 And then the coffeehouse got raided, so I moved the scene uptown. 819 00:58:48,800 --> 00:58:52,640 - You dig, Daddy-O? - Oh, I do dig. 820 00:58:52,710 --> 00:58:58,010 And after being grounded for 24 days, this astronaut is ready to blast off. 821 00:59:03,450 --> 00:59:07,080 - Ask me why I mourn. - Why do you mourn, baby? 822 00:59:07,160 --> 00:59:10,220 I mourn because you are shrouded in the suit and tie... 823 00:59:10,290 --> 00:59:12,990 that Madison Avenue will bury you in alive. 824 00:59:13,060 --> 00:59:17,020 Well, if it'll cheer you up, you can help me out of it. 825 00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:34,770 - Hi! - Hi! Coffee? 826 00:59:34,850 --> 00:59:38,210 So, this is a beatnik party. 827 00:59:38,280 --> 00:59:40,680 - Isn't it a gas? - Yes! 828 00:59:40,750 --> 00:59:44,690 Oh, I'm so glad you called. After the date I had tonight, I really didn't want to be alone. 829 00:59:44,760 --> 00:59:47,990 Well, you won't need an astronaut to find a date here. Everyone's in orbit. 830 00:59:48,060 --> 00:59:52,390 So, should I introduce myself to the host, or is that too Establishment? 831 00:59:52,470 --> 00:59:55,200 You know the host. This is Peter's place. 832 00:59:55,270 --> 00:59:58,360 - Catcher Block's not going to be here, is he? - Oh, not to worry. 833 00:59:58,440 --> 01:00:00,960 Everyone here is a total stranger. 834 01:00:01,040 --> 01:00:04,070 Go throw your coat on the bed, and let's join the bash! 835 01:00:12,220 --> 01:00:14,690 Oh, excuse me. 836 01:00:14,750 --> 01:00:17,310 - Catch. - Yes? 837 01:00:19,060 --> 01:00:21,080 Zip? 838 01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:25,320 [ Catcher ] Barbara. Barbara, wait. 839 01:00:25,400 --> 01:00:28,420 - Barbara! - [ Elevator Bell Dings ] 840 01:00:28,500 --> 01:00:32,900 - Barbara, wait! I can explain. - You don't have to explain. 841 01:00:32,970 --> 01:00:37,270 You said you were ready for bed. I'm glad you ran into someone to take to bed with you. 842 01:00:37,340 --> 01:00:41,110 - But it wasn't like that. I don't even know her. - Oh, really! 843 01:00:41,180 --> 01:00:43,510 I mean, I didn't know what I was doin'. 844 01:00:43,580 --> 01:00:47,040 And yet her hat's off to you anyway! 845 01:00:47,120 --> 01:00:49,380 What? 846 01:00:59,530 --> 01:01:02,800 - Good night, miss. - [ Bell Dings ] 847 01:01:04,170 --> 01:01:06,600 Good night, Major Martin. 848 01:01:06,670 --> 01:01:09,640 Barbara, you gotta believe me. I did not know what was happening. 849 01:01:09,710 --> 01:01:13,800 The minute I got here, that girl filled my pipe with some tobacco she bought in San Francisco. 850 01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:16,750 After that, everything went hoo-whee! 851 01:01:16,820 --> 01:01:20,770 - You mean she drugged you? - All the way into that bedroom. 852 01:01:20,850 --> 01:01:24,450 Wait a minute. What were you doing at a party like that? 853 01:01:24,520 --> 01:01:27,820 I had no idea there was gonna be a party here. 854 01:01:27,890 --> 01:01:32,130 I got a call after you left to tell me to come to this publisher's apartment... 855 01:01:32,200 --> 01:01:36,500 to meet some journalist who wanted to do a cover story on my NASA top-secret project. 856 01:01:36,570 --> 01:01:41,170 - Some guy named Snitch or Snatch. - Catch? Catcher Block? 857 01:01:41,240 --> 01:01:45,570 Maybe. Anyway, I rush over here, and that guy does not even show up. 858 01:01:45,640 --> 01:01:49,410 - Don't you see? You were set up. - No! 859 01:01:49,480 --> 01:01:52,780 Yes! Catcher Block invited you here... 860 01:01:52,850 --> 01:01:56,790 under false pretenses so he could do one of his famous exposés... 861 01:01:56,860 --> 01:02:00,550 on how NASA's top-secret New York project... 862 01:02:00,630 --> 01:02:03,890 is just one big, drug-infested beatnik shindig. 863 01:02:03,960 --> 01:02:06,930 - Oh, that's low! - That's Catcher Block! 864 01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:11,460 - That's how he operates.! - Oh, Barbara, I'm so sorry. 865 01:02:11,540 --> 01:02:16,070 I just feel like such "a" easily tricked hick... 866 01:02:16,140 --> 01:02:20,840 and then you went and made the trick seem so obvious. 867 01:02:20,910 --> 01:02:25,980 Oh, Zip, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. 868 01:02:26,050 --> 01:02:29,610 I didn't mean to make you feel mad. 869 01:02:29,690 --> 01:02:32,780 Oh, this is terrible. 870 01:02:32,860 --> 01:02:36,730 We're behaving just like two people in love. 871 01:02:38,530 --> 01:02:41,190 Which means this argument was the final straw. This has to be the end. 872 01:02:41,270 --> 01:02:43,830 Or just the beginning. Holy cow. 873 01:02:43,900 --> 01:02:48,840 This argument has made me realize that I must really care about you. 874 01:02:48,910 --> 01:02:52,140 I'm finally ready to get to know you better. 875 01:02:52,210 --> 01:02:54,410 How much better? 876 01:02:54,480 --> 01:02:56,880 All the way better. 877 01:02:56,950 --> 01:03:00,910 - Really? - I'm sorry I have to say this, Barbara... 878 01:03:00,990 --> 01:03:05,550 but... I love you. 879 01:03:05,620 --> 01:03:09,720 Well, I don't have any rules... 880 01:03:09,800 --> 01:03:11,850 against men falling in love. 881 01:03:11,930 --> 01:03:15,420 So I can make love to you... 882 01:03:15,500 --> 01:03:20,370 heartfelt, passionate, worshipping, adoring love... 883 01:03:20,440 --> 01:03:23,170 and you could still have meaningless sex with me, right? 884 01:03:23,240 --> 01:03:25,680 Yes. 885 01:03:25,740 --> 01:03:28,910 So are we still on for tomorrow night? 886 01:03:28,980 --> 01:03:31,210 Yes. 887 01:03:31,280 --> 01:03:34,220 Oh, yes. [ Sighs ] 888 01:03:36,690 --> 01:03:39,920 That pink book is ruining my life.! 889 01:03:39,990 --> 01:03:42,860 Woman acts as if she has a mind of her own. 890 01:03:42,930 --> 01:03:45,060 She refuses my advances. 891 01:03:45,130 --> 01:03:48,100 This goes straight to the sanctity of a man's most fundamental right. 892 01:03:48,170 --> 01:03:50,190 All our wives are giving us trouble. 893 01:03:50,270 --> 01:03:53,240 I'm not talking about my wife. I'm talking about my mistress. 894 01:03:54,370 --> 01:03:57,370 I want that Vikki Hiller fired! 895 01:03:57,440 --> 01:04:01,400 But you can't fire her now, T.B. 896 01:04:01,480 --> 01:04:04,640 How would it look? 897 01:04:04,720 --> 01:04:07,580 She is the most celebrated editor in the business. 898 01:04:07,650 --> 01:04:09,590 You're my creative team. 899 01:04:09,660 --> 01:04:12,150 Create a reason to get rid of her... 900 01:04:12,220 --> 01:04:15,060 or I'll create a new creative team. 901 01:04:17,530 --> 01:04:21,520 - [ Door Slams ] - [ Elevator Bell Dings ] 902 01:04:21,600 --> 01:04:26,060 - [ Receptionist Talking, Indistinct ] - Good morning, gentlemen. 903 01:04:26,140 --> 01:04:28,070 Do you know why it's good? 904 01:04:28,140 --> 01:04:31,630 Because this is the morning I tell Theodore Banner that my fellow senior editors... 905 01:04:31,710 --> 01:04:35,170 are going to treat me like more than just a titular senior editor... 906 01:04:35,250 --> 01:04:38,680 or I quit. [ Sighs ] 907 01:04:45,990 --> 01:04:49,550 I should've known the top dog would be a rat. 908 01:04:49,630 --> 01:04:52,190 He's a man. I hate men. 909 01:04:52,260 --> 01:04:56,100 For as man-crazy as I've been my whole life, I sure can't stand 'em. 910 01:04:56,170 --> 01:05:00,540 - I think I'll just get married. - You're upset. You'll find another job. 911 01:05:00,610 --> 01:05:02,300 I don't want another job. 912 01:05:02,370 --> 01:05:06,330 I'm sorry, but I don't wanna be a Down with Love girl anymore. 913 01:05:06,410 --> 01:05:12,150 I give up. I give in. I just wanna be Mrs. Peter MacMannus. 914 01:05:12,220 --> 01:05:13,710 Really? 915 01:05:13,790 --> 01:05:17,150 At least then there'd be one man I could tell what to do. 916 01:05:17,220 --> 01:05:20,520 Anyway. There. I've said it. 917 01:05:20,590 --> 01:05:24,930 - If you also want me to resign as your friend, I understand. - Oh, Vikki, no! 918 01:05:25,000 --> 01:05:27,490 How could I possibly accept your resignation now... 919 01:05:27,570 --> 01:05:29,970 when I need a friend more than ever? 920 01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:34,500 You see, I have a confession to make too. 921 01:05:34,570 --> 01:05:38,410 I'm not a Down with Love girl either. I'm a woman who's fallen in love. 922 01:05:38,480 --> 01:05:42,040 And I'm gonna tell him. And tonight's the night. 923 01:05:42,110 --> 01:05:45,050 - Tonight? - Yep. 924 01:05:45,120 --> 01:05:48,850 Tonight's the night Barbara Novak is going down. 925 01:05:48,920 --> 01:05:51,150 I've got her exactly where I want her. 926 01:05:51,220 --> 01:05:53,920 She was saying yes, but any man could tell she really meant no. 927 01:05:53,990 --> 01:05:57,690 - Uh-oh. - Here's the title to next month's cover story-- 928 01:05:57,760 --> 01:06:02,200 "Catcher Block on Barbara Novak: Penetrating the Myth." 929 01:06:02,270 --> 01:06:05,170 We'll have to sell it in a brown wrapper. 930 01:06:05,240 --> 01:06:07,210 I'm taking her to my place, which she still thinks is your place... 931 01:06:07,270 --> 01:06:10,540 by saying the guy she thinks I am, who acts like you, has a meeting there with you... 932 01:06:10,610 --> 01:06:12,770 and the guy who she still doesn't know I really am. 933 01:06:12,850 --> 01:06:16,680 - What do I have to say? - You don't say a word. 934 01:06:16,750 --> 01:06:20,050 Gotcha. So this is it? Tonight's the night? 935 01:06:20,120 --> 01:06:22,050 I have to have my big night with Vikki... 936 01:06:22,120 --> 01:06:24,350 the same time you're having your big night with Novak... 937 01:06:24,420 --> 01:06:27,450 that will ruin Novak and Vikki and everything Vikki's ever worked for. 938 01:06:27,530 --> 01:06:31,090 You're putting me under an enormous amount of pressure, enough to make a man explode. 939 01:06:31,160 --> 01:06:35,860 Finally. Here's to tonight. 940 01:06:36,000 --> 01:06:39,600 ♪♪[ woman Scatting Bossa Nova Style ] 941 01:07:16,810 --> 01:07:19,370 ♪♪[ Man Singing Big Band Style ] 942 01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:58,300 - [ Elevator Bell Dings ] - I hope you don't mind this detour. 943 01:08:58,370 --> 01:09:02,970 I only mind if Peter MacMannus is wasting your time. 944 01:09:03,050 --> 01:09:05,310 Oh. 945 01:09:05,380 --> 01:09:07,470 "Dear Zip, something came up. 946 01:09:07,550 --> 01:09:10,710 Accept my apologies with the champagne inside." 947 01:09:10,790 --> 01:09:12,720 Typical. 948 01:09:12,790 --> 01:09:15,950 Well, we might as well crack the champagne. 949 01:09:16,030 --> 01:09:19,390 - We'll only be 10 minutes. - Ten minutes? 950 01:09:19,460 --> 01:09:21,950 Ten minutes. 951 01:09:22,030 --> 01:09:25,230 ♪♪[Japanese Traditional ] 952 01:09:28,570 --> 01:09:31,200 - Peter, are you all right? You seem nervous. - I don't seem guilty. 953 01:09:31,270 --> 01:09:35,210 - What would I seem guilty about? - I didn't say guilty. I said nervous. 954 01:09:35,280 --> 01:09:37,970 - Are you accusing me of keeping something from you? - Peter, calm down. 955 01:09:38,050 --> 01:09:42,380 It's all right. You're not keeping anything from me. I already know. 956 01:09:42,450 --> 01:09:45,480 - What? - I know all about it. I've known all along. 957 01:09:45,560 --> 01:09:49,150 - You have? - Yes. And so what? 958 01:09:49,230 --> 01:09:52,460 So you're a homosexual hopelessly in love with Catcher Block. 959 01:09:52,530 --> 01:09:56,490 - That's no reason the two of us can't be married. - What? I'm not a homosexual! 960 01:09:56,570 --> 01:09:59,130 Oh, Peter, come on! 961 01:09:59,200 --> 01:10:03,370 The cooking for Catch at his place? The pictures of Catch's parents at your place? 962 01:10:03,440 --> 01:10:06,340 Believe me. If there'd been any other explanation, I would've found it. 963 01:10:06,410 --> 01:10:11,280 At one point, I even convinced myself that life was all one big, zany sex comedy... 964 01:10:11,350 --> 01:10:14,750 and you had switched keys with the lead to use his swinging pad to snare me. 965 01:10:14,820 --> 01:10:17,150 I did! I did switch keys with the lead! 966 01:10:17,220 --> 01:10:20,820 Oh, please! If that's not what you feel guilty about, then what is? 967 01:10:20,890 --> 01:10:24,490 That Catcher Block is privately tricking Barbara Novak so he can publicly destroy her... 968 01:10:24,560 --> 01:10:27,500 with one of his exposés. [ Gasps ] 969 01:10:27,560 --> 01:10:31,430 What? And you've known about this all along? Where are they? 970 01:10:31,500 --> 01:10:33,490 His place-- uh, my place. 971 01:10:33,570 --> 01:10:35,800 Uh, his place. 972 01:10:35,870 --> 01:10:39,810 Good-bye, Peter. The wedding is off! 973 01:10:39,880 --> 01:10:43,680 Vikki, wait! Let me explain! 974 01:10:46,320 --> 01:10:49,290 Where's my geisha? I need my shoes. 975 01:10:54,760 --> 01:10:57,450 Now, let me see if I have this. 976 01:10:57,530 --> 01:11:00,160 The first switch starts the hi-fi. 977 01:11:00,230 --> 01:11:04,500 The second switch lowers the lights. Do you wanna go for broke? 978 01:11:04,570 --> 01:11:09,130 - [ Inhales Deeply ] I'm game if you are. - [ Chuckles ] 979 01:11:12,010 --> 01:11:14,270 [ Whirring ] 980 01:11:34,560 --> 01:11:37,800 [ British Accent ] You have an eyelash. 981 01:11:39,100 --> 01:11:41,870 [ Southern Accent ] Make a wish. 982 01:11:43,270 --> 01:11:45,670 [ Blows ] 983 01:11:47,010 --> 01:11:51,240 - What? - Funny... the way that you said "lash." 984 01:11:51,310 --> 01:11:54,550 - It sounded like you had a different accent. - Ohh. 985 01:11:56,390 --> 01:11:59,510 That is funny! 986 01:11:59,590 --> 01:12:03,250 Anyway, this definitely is a woman-snaring bachelor pad... 987 01:12:03,330 --> 01:12:06,890 fully loaded to get you in the mood. 988 01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:10,830 Are you in the mood, Zip? 989 01:12:15,200 --> 01:12:18,640 Yes, Barbara, I am. 990 01:12:33,160 --> 01:12:35,090 Mm. 991 01:12:35,160 --> 01:12:38,220 Oh. Oh. 992 01:12:38,290 --> 01:12:41,260 - Darling? - [ Moans ] 993 01:12:41,330 --> 01:12:43,260 - No. - No? 994 01:12:43,330 --> 01:12:45,560 After you've waited all this time, and now you're saying no? 995 01:12:45,640 --> 01:12:50,000 - Yes. There's something I wanna tell you. - Oh. 996 01:12:54,280 --> 01:12:58,870 - Yes, Barbara Novak, tell me anything. - [ Barbara Moans ] 997 01:12:58,950 --> 01:13:02,680 - I love you. - Tell me how much, Barbara Novak. 998 01:13:02,750 --> 01:13:06,520 Too much. [ Gasping ] Ohh. 999 01:13:06,590 --> 01:13:09,150 Too much. Too much to have sex with you. 1000 01:13:09,230 --> 01:13:13,320 Right. Because you are Barbara Novak. 1001 01:13:13,400 --> 01:13:16,560 - Mm. - Author of Down with Love. 1002 01:13:16,630 --> 01:13:20,860 And you do not believe in having sex with feelings. 1003 01:13:20,940 --> 01:13:24,840 No. That's not why I want you to stop. 1004 01:13:24,910 --> 01:13:29,170 I want you to stop because I love you too much to have sex without marrying you. 1005 01:13:29,250 --> 01:13:34,550 I want what every woman wants: love and marriage. 1006 01:13:34,620 --> 01:13:39,750 I'm not a Down with Love girl. I'm not the girl you think I am. 1007 01:13:39,820 --> 01:13:42,810 Oh, you are exactly the girl I think you are. 1008 01:13:57,070 --> 01:14:00,840 - [ Gwendolyn ] Catcher Block! - [ Record Scratches ] 1009 01:14:00,910 --> 01:14:03,070 You're getting sloppy.! 1010 01:14:03,150 --> 01:14:06,910 Leaving a key on the outside when you're busy on the inside? 1011 01:14:06,980 --> 01:14:11,550 Oh, why the long faces? We're all equal, self-reliant citizens of the world here. 1012 01:14:11,620 --> 01:14:13,520 I know I am, and heaven knows all men are. 1013 01:14:13,590 --> 01:14:16,520 And you're with Catch Block, so I hope you are. 1014 01:14:16,590 --> 01:14:20,260 Anyway, I just popped by for a little sex à la carte. 1015 01:14:20,330 --> 01:14:25,160 But since you're busy, I'll just ring up my crew captain at the hotel. 1016 01:14:26,170 --> 01:14:31,160 - Cheerio! - [ Door Closes ] 1017 01:14:35,850 --> 01:14:40,680 [ British Accent ] All right. Now you know. 1018 01:14:40,820 --> 01:14:44,270 I'm Catcher Block, not Zip Martin. 1019 01:14:44,350 --> 01:14:47,150 There is no Zip Martin. 1020 01:14:48,660 --> 01:14:54,390 But before you storm out of here, admit it: I got you. 1021 01:14:54,460 --> 01:14:58,360 I got Barbara "Down with Love" Novak to fall in love. 1022 01:15:06,140 --> 01:15:08,940 I'm not gonna storm out of here, Catch. 1023 01:15:09,010 --> 01:15:13,500 And I'm not gonna admit that you got Barbara Novak to fall in love... 1024 01:15:13,580 --> 01:15:16,410 because I'm not Barbara Novak. 1025 01:15:16,480 --> 01:15:19,480 - There is no Barbara Novak. - Huh? 1026 01:15:19,550 --> 01:15:24,620 I didn't fall in love with Zip Martin. I fell in love with Catcher Block. 1027 01:15:24,690 --> 01:15:28,750 And that was a year ago, when for three and a half weeks, I worked as your secretary. 1028 01:15:28,830 --> 01:15:32,930 I don't expect you to remember me. I wasn't a blond then. But you did ask me out. 1029 01:15:33,000 --> 01:15:37,230 And it broke my heart to say no, but I loved you too much. 1030 01:15:37,310 --> 01:15:40,500 I couldn't bear to become just another notch in your bedpost. 1031 01:15:40,580 --> 01:15:43,240 With your dating habits, I knew that even if I was lucky enough... 1032 01:15:43,310 --> 01:15:46,680 to get a regular spot on your rotating schedule... 1033 01:15:46,750 --> 01:15:51,050 I would never have your undivided attention long enough for you to fall in love with me. 1034 01:15:51,120 --> 01:15:54,890 I knew I had to do something to set myself apart. 1035 01:15:54,960 --> 01:15:57,620 I knew I had to quit my job as your secretary... 1036 01:15:57,690 --> 01:16:02,530 and write an international best-seller controversial enough... 1037 01:16:02,600 --> 01:16:06,530 to get the attention of a New York publisher as well as KNOw magazine... 1038 01:16:06,600 --> 01:16:11,160 but insignificant enough that as long as I went unseen, KNOw magazine's star journalist... 1039 01:16:11,240 --> 01:16:13,710 would refuse to do a cover story about it. 1040 01:16:13,780 --> 01:16:16,470 I knew that every time we were supposed to meet, you would get distracted... 1041 01:16:16,540 --> 01:16:19,380 by one of your many girlfriends and stand me up... 1042 01:16:19,450 --> 01:16:22,080 and this would give me a reason to fight with you over the phone... 1043 01:16:22,150 --> 01:16:25,680 and declare that I wouldn't meet with you for a hundred years. 1044 01:16:25,750 --> 01:16:29,590 And then all I would have to do was be patient and wait... 1045 01:16:29,660 --> 01:16:32,490 the two or three weeks it would take for everyone in the world... 1046 01:16:32,560 --> 01:16:34,820 to buy a copy of my best-seller-- 1047 01:16:34,900 --> 01:16:37,990 and then I would begin to get the publicity I would need for you... 1048 01:16:38,070 --> 01:16:42,060 to, one, see what I look like, and, two, see me denounce you in public... 1049 01:16:42,140 --> 01:16:44,600 as the worst kind of man. 1050 01:16:44,670 --> 01:16:48,610 I knew this would make you wanna get even by writing one of your exposés. 1051 01:16:48,680 --> 01:16:51,200 And in order to do that, you would have to go undercover... 1052 01:16:51,280 --> 01:16:54,480 assume a false identity and pretend to be the kind of man... 1053 01:16:54,550 --> 01:16:57,750 who would make the kind of girl I was pretending to be fall in love. 1054 01:16:57,820 --> 01:17:01,690 Since I was pretending to be a girl who would have sex on the first date... 1055 01:17:01,760 --> 01:17:05,520 you would have to pretend to be a man who wouldn't have sex for several dates. 1056 01:17:05,590 --> 01:17:09,430 And in doing so, we would go out on lots of dates... 1057 01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:13,090 to all the best places and all the hit shows... 1058 01:17:13,170 --> 01:17:17,330 until finally, one night, you would take me back to your place-- 1059 01:17:17,410 --> 01:17:19,640 that you were pretending was someone else's-- 1060 01:17:19,710 --> 01:17:23,540 in order to get the evidence you needed to write your exposé... 1061 01:17:23,610 --> 01:17:29,170 by seducing me until I said, "I love you." 1062 01:17:29,250 --> 01:17:34,690 But saying "I love you" was also my plan. 1063 01:17:34,760 --> 01:17:38,710 I just wanted to tell you the truth so that when you heard me say, "I love you"... 1064 01:17:38,790 --> 01:17:42,590 you would know that I knew who you were, and you would know who I was. 1065 01:17:42,660 --> 01:17:45,690 Then you, the great Catcher Block... 1066 01:17:45,770 --> 01:17:50,030 would know that you'd been beaten at your own game... 1067 01:17:50,100 --> 01:17:54,340 by me, Nancy Brown, your former secretary. 1068 01:17:54,410 --> 01:17:58,280 And I would have, once and for all, set myself apart... 1069 01:17:58,350 --> 01:18:01,910 from all the other girls you've known, all those other girls... 1070 01:18:01,980 --> 01:18:06,180 that you never really cared about, by making myself someone... 1071 01:18:06,250 --> 01:18:10,950 like the one person you really love and admire... 1072 01:18:11,030 --> 01:18:14,930 above all others: you. 1073 01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:18,450 Then, when you realized that you had finally met your match... 1074 01:18:18,530 --> 01:18:21,900 I would have at last gained the respect... 1075 01:18:21,970 --> 01:18:27,810 that would make you wanna marry me first and seduce me later. 1076 01:18:32,950 --> 01:18:37,350 I just wanted you to hear all this from me before you heard it from your private eye. 1077 01:18:37,420 --> 01:18:40,790 [ Telephone Rings ] 1078 01:18:42,990 --> 01:18:45,790 - Yeah? - Block, McNulty. 1079 01:18:45,860 --> 01:18:48,990 Got everything there is on Novak, and it's nothing. 1080 01:18:49,060 --> 01:18:52,590 Novak doesn't exist except for a P.O. box in Maine... 1081 01:18:52,670 --> 01:18:55,430 in care of one Nancy Brown of 28 Gramercy Park... 1082 01:18:55,500 --> 01:18:58,770 where she was born and raised. 1083 01:18:58,840 --> 01:19:01,810 And while our Nancy may have broken a few hearts growing up... 1084 01:19:01,880 --> 01:19:05,970 I can't find the guy we're lookin' for who broke hers. 1085 01:19:06,050 --> 01:19:10,380 Never mind. I found him. 1086 01:19:15,060 --> 01:19:19,790 So, now you know everything. 1087 01:19:19,860 --> 01:19:23,230 Now tell me the one thing I don't know. 1088 01:19:23,300 --> 01:19:26,460 Tell me if this plan of mine has worked. 1089 01:19:26,530 --> 01:19:32,300 Tell me if it's made you fall in love with me, as I love you. 1090 01:19:50,160 --> 01:19:55,220 - Come on. We're going out. - Out? Now? Why? 1091 01:19:55,300 --> 01:19:58,730 Because no wife of mine belongs in an apartment like this. 1092 01:19:58,800 --> 01:20:00,460 Wife? 1093 01:20:00,530 --> 01:20:02,660 - You will marry me, won't you, Barbara? - Nancy. 1094 01:20:02,740 --> 01:20:06,230 - Nancy. - Oh, Catch. 1095 01:20:06,310 --> 01:20:09,440 It's all I've ever wanted. 1096 01:20:14,050 --> 01:20:17,210 - Are you sure it's what you want? - Of course I'm sure. 1097 01:20:17,280 --> 01:20:20,480 I've met my match. There's only been one thing between us... 1098 01:20:20,550 --> 01:20:24,180 and that's gone now that you're done pretending to be Barbara Novak. 1099 01:20:24,260 --> 01:20:27,690 You are Barbara Novak! Oh, I didn't realize! 1100 01:20:27,760 --> 01:20:30,200 You are my heroine! 1101 01:20:30,260 --> 01:20:33,230 Oh, of course you are. You're the heroine of all women around the world. 1102 01:20:33,300 --> 01:20:36,860 But you saved my life. Oh, I'm still flying friendly in the skies... 1103 01:20:36,940 --> 01:20:39,600 but now I decide how friendly and when and with whom. 1104 01:20:39,670 --> 01:20:44,870 Oh, and I'm also training for my pilot's license! And I have you to thank for it. 1105 01:20:44,950 --> 01:20:49,780 Thank you, Barbara Novak. Thank you for all womankind. 1106 01:20:58,930 --> 01:21:02,830 - [ Door Closes ] - [ Catcher ] wow. You are something else. 1107 01:21:02,900 --> 01:21:06,960 You didn'tjust fool me, you fooled the whole world. 1108 01:21:07,030 --> 01:21:10,090 But now we can set the whole world straight. 1109 01:21:10,170 --> 01:21:13,000 Our marriage will end the battle of the sexes. 1110 01:21:13,070 --> 01:21:16,640 Boy, this cover story's not just the Pulitzer. This could be the Nobel Peace Prize. 1111 01:21:16,710 --> 01:21:19,510 Catch, you're not still going to write your exposé, are you? 1112 01:21:19,580 --> 01:21:22,710 - Why not? - Well, you know why not. 1113 01:21:22,780 --> 01:21:25,650 All the women in the world, they look to me. 1114 01:21:25,720 --> 01:21:28,210 The exposé can't hurt you now. 1115 01:21:28,290 --> 01:21:31,120 You're gonna have everything you've ever wished for. 1116 01:21:31,190 --> 01:21:34,750 You'll be Mrs. Catcher Block, living in our dream house in the suburbs... 1117 01:21:34,830 --> 01:21:37,320 with a yard full of noisy kids-- 1118 01:21:37,400 --> 01:21:40,160 you putting them to bed, then you and me having a quiet dinner. 1119 01:21:40,230 --> 01:21:46,100 Catch, stop. I can't do this. 1120 01:21:46,170 --> 01:21:50,840 Barbara, stop! Don't do this! He's not who he says he is! 1121 01:21:53,610 --> 01:21:59,110 Neither am I. Good-bye, Catch. 1122 01:22:03,360 --> 01:22:06,490 Good-bye? 1123 01:22:09,030 --> 01:22:11,860 [ Grunts ] 1124 01:22:14,600 --> 01:22:16,970 - Barbara? - Vikki.! 1125 01:22:17,040 --> 01:22:20,670 - Nancy! - Who are you calling Nancy? 1126 01:22:20,740 --> 01:22:24,480 - Hey, wait, wait. Please let me explain. - There is no explanation. 1127 01:22:24,610 --> 01:22:28,310 Deceiving the girl you're going to marry about your homosexuality is one thing. 1128 01:22:28,380 --> 01:22:30,580 Deceiving me in business is another. 1129 01:22:30,650 --> 01:22:32,780 I thought you were different, but you're not. 1130 01:22:32,850 --> 01:22:37,310 You're a rat, Peter MacMannus. You're just like every other man. 1131 01:22:42,460 --> 01:22:46,090 I'm just like every other man. 1132 01:22:58,780 --> 01:23:01,410 Peter MacMannus. Tsk, tsk, tsk. 1133 01:23:01,480 --> 01:23:04,280 What do you say we step inside? 1134 01:23:04,350 --> 01:23:06,290 - Well-- - Just for 10 minutes. 1135 01:23:06,350 --> 01:23:08,380 - Ten minutes? - Ten minutes. 1136 01:23:08,460 --> 01:23:12,260 Nancy, wait! What do you mean, you can't do this? 1137 01:23:12,330 --> 01:23:14,920 - I mean I can't marry you. - What? 1138 01:23:15,000 --> 01:23:17,830 I can't be Mrs. Catcher Block. 1139 01:23:17,900 --> 01:23:21,930 I can't be your wife with the kids and the house in the suburbs. 1140 01:23:22,000 --> 01:23:24,870 There was one part of my plan that I didn't count on: 1141 01:23:24,940 --> 01:23:28,100 that by pretending to be Barbara Novak... 1142 01:23:28,170 --> 01:23:30,970 I would actually become Barbara Novak. 1143 01:23:31,040 --> 01:23:34,210 I may be the last woman in the world to do it, but I have finally... 1144 01:23:34,280 --> 01:23:38,220 become a Down with Love girl, level three. 1145 01:23:39,950 --> 01:23:44,410 I don't want love, and I don't want you. 1146 01:24:03,480 --> 01:24:05,970 [ Rolling Thunder ] 1147 01:24:27,600 --> 01:24:31,130 [ Doorbell Buzzing ] 1148 01:24:31,200 --> 01:24:34,260 - What did Vikki say? Any luck? - Nope. 1149 01:24:34,340 --> 01:24:36,830 Barbara still doesn't want to see you. 1150 01:24:36,910 --> 01:24:39,880 She's thrown away everything you sent her-- 1151 01:24:39,950 --> 01:24:44,940 the flowers, the candy, the $6,000 state-of-the-art Celestron telescope... 1152 01:24:45,020 --> 01:24:48,510 that wasn't really for you to send, because it was mine, not yours. 1153 01:24:48,590 --> 01:24:51,560 - She hates me. - At least Novak dropped you flat. 1154 01:24:51,630 --> 01:24:54,030 You know where you stand. 1155 01:24:54,090 --> 01:24:57,360 Sometimes I think Vikki only started talking marriage to me that night... 1156 01:24:57,430 --> 01:25:00,160 in order to get me to have sex with her. 1157 01:25:00,230 --> 01:25:05,170 Once I did, I hardly ever see her, except when she comes back for more. 1158 01:25:05,240 --> 01:25:09,970 And I always give in. Makes me feel so used. 1159 01:25:10,040 --> 01:25:13,880 [ Slurps ] It's just not right.! I shouldn't feel used.! 1160 01:25:13,950 --> 01:25:17,410 She should, but she's taking her cues from Novak. 1161 01:25:17,480 --> 01:25:21,550 That's why you have to get to Novak. You have to solve this, Catch. 1162 01:25:21,620 --> 01:25:24,390 You have to squash her, crush her-- 1163 01:25:24,460 --> 01:25:26,760 if not for the sake of civilization, then just for me. 1164 01:25:26,830 --> 01:25:30,060 - I don't wanna crush her. I love her. - All right. Fine. 1165 01:25:30,130 --> 01:25:32,120 So run with that then. 1166 01:25:32,200 --> 01:25:35,900 What happened to your idea about making your exposé into a public love letter? 1167 01:25:35,970 --> 01:25:39,000 That's no good. She's down with love-- for real this time. 1168 01:25:39,070 --> 01:25:41,940 You have to think of something. Come on. Get dressed. 1169 01:25:42,010 --> 01:25:45,500 We're going out. You have to start circulating again. 1170 01:25:45,580 --> 01:25:48,600 - Ooh, where's your little black book? - I threw it away. 1171 01:25:48,680 --> 01:25:51,670 - [ Gasps ] - I don't care about sex anymore. 1172 01:25:51,750 --> 01:25:54,780 - I just wanna be married. - Well, me too, but fat chance. 1173 01:25:57,420 --> 01:26:02,560 These Down with Love girls! It's revenge against men! 1174 01:26:02,630 --> 01:26:08,300 And it's all your fault, lover boy! That's why they all act like you! 1175 01:26:08,370 --> 01:26:10,530 [ Rolling Thunder ] 1176 01:26:10,600 --> 01:26:13,570 [ Thunderclap ] 1177 01:26:28,960 --> 01:26:30,890 Stop the presses. 1178 01:26:30,960 --> 01:26:33,620 I've got a cover story that'll make KNOw magazine sell... 1179 01:26:33,690 --> 01:26:36,090 like no magazine has never sold before. 1180 01:26:36,160 --> 01:26:38,820 "Catcher Block Exposed: 1181 01:26:38,900 --> 01:26:42,530 How Falling in Love with Barbara Novak Made Me a New Man." 1182 01:26:42,600 --> 01:26:45,330 It's my public love letter. It's not from me, or at least not the old me. 1183 01:26:45,410 --> 01:26:50,400 It's from the new me, the new man that Barbara Novak could fall in love with. 1184 01:26:50,480 --> 01:26:53,670 - Come on, Mac! Let's get this baby to print! - We're not going to print. 1185 01:26:53,750 --> 01:26:56,580 Haven't you noticed? We have no secretaries. 1186 01:26:56,650 --> 01:26:59,620 Every girl in New York City has quit herjob. 1187 01:26:59,690 --> 01:27:02,020 They all wanna go work for your Barbara Novak. 1188 01:27:03,790 --> 01:27:07,850 - For Barbara? Where? - Oh-ho-ho. 1189 01:27:10,400 --> 01:27:13,560 Novak topped you again. 1190 01:27:22,610 --> 01:27:25,340 [ Elevator Bell Dings ] 1191 01:27:30,620 --> 01:27:33,780 [ Chattering ] 1192 01:27:42,700 --> 01:27:46,360 It's here! Down with Love chocolate. 1193 01:27:46,430 --> 01:27:50,630 - [ Gasps ] - A mouthful of satisfaction in every bite. 1194 01:27:50,700 --> 01:27:54,500 Vikki, you are a genius.! 1195 01:27:54,570 --> 01:27:56,740 Look, your book got chocolate sales to soar. 1196 01:27:56,810 --> 01:27:59,640 Why shouldn't we get a piece of the action? 1197 01:27:59,710 --> 01:28:02,340 It sure killed my craving for sex. 1198 01:28:02,420 --> 01:28:04,820 The only man who could have his way with me now is Milton Hershey. 1199 01:28:04,880 --> 01:28:08,650 Boy, am I glad it finally occurred to you that you were a multimillionaire... 1200 01:28:08,720 --> 01:28:12,990 many times over and we could start our own business. 1201 01:28:13,060 --> 01:28:17,390 And to think I came that close to getting married and giving all this up. 1202 01:28:17,460 --> 01:28:20,990 I was really starting to believe that women weren't cut out for the workplace... 1203 01:28:21,070 --> 01:28:24,200 when the only problem was the workplace wasn't cut out for women. 1204 01:28:24,270 --> 01:28:26,700 Banner House bastards. 1205 01:28:26,770 --> 01:28:30,070 The word is out that Novak/Hiller International is cut to order. 1206 01:28:30,140 --> 01:28:35,580 Girls are lined up around the block to apply for the job as my private secretary. 1207 01:28:35,650 --> 01:28:40,590 And that's not all. Catcher Block is here. He wants to see you. 1208 01:28:40,650 --> 01:28:44,420 [ Sighs ] Well, call the guard, because I don't wanna see him. 1209 01:28:44,490 --> 01:28:49,020 - You have to see him. He's an applicant. - Ooh. 1210 01:28:49,100 --> 01:28:52,760 - For heaven's sake. - At the risk of sounding like my mother... 1211 01:28:52,830 --> 01:28:57,570 just stay perfectly still and let him get it over with. 1212 01:28:57,640 --> 01:29:00,370 - [ Intercom Beeps ] - Mrs. Litzer. 1213 01:29:00,440 --> 01:29:02,640 Send in the first applicant, please. 1214 01:29:02,710 --> 01:29:07,440 Okay, "Novick." Over and out. 1215 01:29:26,530 --> 01:29:31,600 Another ruse, Catcher? You know I have no interest in seeing you. 1216 01:29:31,670 --> 01:29:34,700 But you know you have to. And you know I know you have to. 1217 01:29:34,770 --> 01:29:37,300 I'm sure you know how things are at KNOw ever since your new Now. 1218 01:29:37,380 --> 01:29:40,140 I have no way of knowing how things are now at KNOw. 1219 01:29:40,210 --> 01:29:42,610 I knew how things were at KNOw before now. 1220 01:29:42,680 --> 01:29:45,094 Then you should know now at KNOw things are a lot like they are at Now. 1221 01:29:45,120 --> 01:29:48,420 We have to interview every applicant for every job, and so do you... 1222 01:29:48,490 --> 01:29:51,180 or you'd be going against Now's definition of discrimination... 1223 01:29:51,260 --> 01:29:54,120 and you wouldn't want the readers of Now or KNOw to know that, now, would you? 1224 01:29:55,260 --> 01:29:58,920 Have a seat, Mr. Block. 1225 01:29:59,000 --> 01:30:02,590 - [ Clears Throat ] - Your application? 1226 01:30:06,970 --> 01:30:09,770 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh, dear. 1227 01:30:09,840 --> 01:30:14,970 Unfortunately, the secretaryjob doesn't quite pay as much as your currentjob... 1228 01:30:15,050 --> 01:30:18,110 so I guess that's that. 1229 01:30:18,180 --> 01:30:22,590 Good-bye, Mr. Block. Oh, have a candy bar for your trouble. 1230 01:30:22,720 --> 01:30:25,780 And thanks again for thinking of us. 1231 01:30:25,860 --> 01:30:28,150 But I'm always thinking of you, Miss Novak. 1232 01:30:28,230 --> 01:30:30,920 I can't stop thinking of you. 1233 01:30:31,000 --> 01:30:33,860 And I'd like you to reconsider considering me. 1234 01:30:33,930 --> 01:30:37,730 - Even at a pay cut of 96.6%? - It's only money. 1235 01:30:37,800 --> 01:30:39,960 Besides, I've been on top for so long... 1236 01:30:40,040 --> 01:30:42,970 I thought it might be nice to try a new position. 1237 01:30:43,040 --> 01:30:45,800 And you think you could be comfortable in a position under a woman? 1238 01:30:45,880 --> 01:30:49,440 I look forward to it. 1239 01:30:49,510 --> 01:30:51,450 Starting at the bottom... 1240 01:30:51,520 --> 01:30:54,920 working my way up slowly to the top. 1241 01:30:58,620 --> 01:31:03,750 Still, I'm afraid that a man of your experience... 1242 01:31:03,830 --> 01:31:07,200 would be too distracted working in a predominantly female workplace. 1243 01:31:07,260 --> 01:31:12,830 Not at all. You see, I'm not really interested in women à la carte anymore. 1244 01:31:12,900 --> 01:31:16,070 The next time I get involved with a woman, it'll be to settle down. 1245 01:31:19,140 --> 01:31:24,210 Well, I wouldn't want you stealing one of the women from my workforce... 1246 01:31:24,280 --> 01:31:26,770 just to put her away in a house in the suburbs. 1247 01:31:26,850 --> 01:31:31,120 Oh, I wouldn't want that either. I'm what you might call a new man. 1248 01:31:31,190 --> 01:31:34,060 Oh, is that so? 1249 01:31:34,130 --> 01:31:37,290 And I'm looking for a new kind of love. 1250 01:31:45,840 --> 01:31:48,100 "Catcher Block Exposed"? 1251 01:31:48,170 --> 01:31:52,800 "How Falling in Love with Barbara Novak Made Me a New Man." 1252 01:31:52,880 --> 01:31:54,810 Oh, sure. 1253 01:31:54,880 --> 01:31:56,810 And to put yourself on top... 1254 01:31:56,880 --> 01:31:59,580 you just happened to have had to expose me as Nancy Brown... 1255 01:31:59,650 --> 01:32:01,810 in your attempt to win a Nobel prize. 1256 01:32:01,890 --> 01:32:05,410 I never said a word about Nancy Brown. 1257 01:32:05,490 --> 01:32:08,080 And the only prize I wanted to win was you. 1258 01:32:08,160 --> 01:32:12,650 Crazy, isn't it? After all our tricking each other, all our game playing... 1259 01:32:12,730 --> 01:32:15,320 I'm the one who wound up here with the love letter... 1260 01:32:15,400 --> 01:32:18,160 and you're the one with the scoop. 1261 01:32:18,240 --> 01:32:21,500 Still, I'll keep my eye on the billboards... 1262 01:32:21,570 --> 01:32:24,170 and maybe one day you'll do a piece... 1263 01:32:24,240 --> 01:32:27,840 on how you became someone in between the bashful, brunette Nancy Brown... 1264 01:32:27,910 --> 01:32:31,010 and the cool, blond Barbara Novak. 1265 01:32:31,080 --> 01:32:34,920 That's a piece I could really go for. 1266 01:32:43,590 --> 01:32:46,460 [ Chattering ] 1267 01:32:49,900 --> 01:32:54,860 One, two, three... 1268 01:32:54,940 --> 01:32:59,000 four, five. 1269 01:33:18,230 --> 01:33:21,820 - [ Elevator Bell Dings ] - Hmm. 1270 01:33:21,900 --> 01:33:25,840 Someone between a blond and a brunette? 1271 01:33:28,470 --> 01:33:31,740 - [ All Gasping ] - Scooped you again. 1272 01:33:39,520 --> 01:33:43,420 I knew you would. 1273 01:33:43,490 --> 01:33:48,080 I knew the minute I placed an ad as an equal-opportunity employer... 1274 01:33:48,160 --> 01:33:51,560 you would be the first to apply. 1275 01:33:53,730 --> 01:33:58,930 And I knew you knew and you'd let me in to ask you to marry me. 1276 01:34:02,740 --> 01:34:06,230 But you didn't know I'd say yes. 1277 01:34:14,250 --> 01:34:17,910 - Vegas? - We can get married there on the spot. 1278 01:34:17,990 --> 01:34:21,150 - I'm not letting you get away again... ever. - Oh, Catch. 1279 01:34:21,230 --> 01:34:25,420 - I love you, Barbara. - I know. 1280 01:35:15,810 --> 01:35:19,650 - [ Both Phones Ring Simultaneously ] - [ Groans ] 1281 01:35:19,720 --> 01:35:21,710 [ Both ] I'm sorry. You'll have to hold. 1282 01:35:21,780 --> 01:35:23,720 - Peter? - Vikki? 1283 01:35:23,790 --> 01:35:27,220 [ Both ] Do you wanna marry me or not? I'm not giving up my career. 1284 01:35:27,290 --> 01:35:30,490 [ Both ] I wouldn't ask you to. Then it's a deal? 1285 01:35:30,560 --> 01:35:34,150 - Deal! [ Sighs ] - Deal! 1286 01:35:34,230 --> 01:35:37,690 Well, ladies and gentlemen, it's official. 1287 01:35:37,770 --> 01:35:41,230 The battle of the sexes is over. What's that? 1288 01:35:41,300 --> 01:35:43,500 Don't believe me? Well, here's the proof. 1289 01:35:43,570 --> 01:35:47,600 Please give a warm welcome to the coauthors of the new book, Here's to Love... 1290 01:35:47,680 --> 01:35:51,550 Mrs. Barbara Novak-Block and Mr. Catcher Block. 1291 01:35:51,610 --> 01:35:56,850 ♪ Barbara, I'd like to propose a toast ♪ 1292 01:35:56,920 --> 01:36:00,320 ♪ To the topic I dig the most ♪ 1293 01:36:00,390 --> 01:36:03,760 ♪ Catch, let me dust off my lovin' cup ♪ 1294 01:36:03,830 --> 01:36:08,060 [ Both ] ♪ Hey, bartender, fill 'er up ♪ 1295 01:36:08,130 --> 01:36:11,830 ♪ Look how the neon starts to flicker ♪ 1296 01:36:11,900 --> 01:36:15,530 ♪ Love's like a shot but works much quicker ♪ 1297 01:36:15,600 --> 01:36:19,200 ♪ And you're a man who can hold his liquor ♪ 1298 01:36:19,280 --> 01:36:23,370 [ Both ] ♪ Cheers, here's to love ♪ 1299 01:36:23,450 --> 01:36:27,080 ♪ I'm an old-fashioned and you're the cherry ♪ 1300 01:36:27,150 --> 01:36:30,880 ♪ I've got a thirst that's legendary ♪ 1301 01:36:30,950 --> 01:36:35,010 ♪ That's why I fired your secretary ♪ 1302 01:36:35,090 --> 01:36:38,080 [ Both ] ♪ Cheers, here's to love ♪ 1303 01:36:38,160 --> 01:36:42,360 - ♪ Life's a martini ♪ - ♪And you're the shaker ♪ 1304 01:36:42,430 --> 01:36:46,130 - ♪And, baby, I sure packed a punch ♪ - Hey! 1305 01:36:46,200 --> 01:36:49,870 ♪ You make Dean Martin look like a Quaker ♪ 1306 01:36:49,940 --> 01:36:52,500 - ♪ But now it's only you for dinner ♪ - Breakfast. 1307 01:36:52,580 --> 01:36:57,340 - And lunch. - ♪ I hear the march that's calling for us ♪ 1308 01:36:57,410 --> 01:37:01,040 ♪ We'll walk down the aisle to an angels' chorus ♪ 1309 01:37:01,120 --> 01:37:05,450 ♪ I'll be your Rock if you'll be my Doris ♪ 1310 01:37:05,520 --> 01:37:09,050 [ Both ] ♪ Sweet heavens above ♪ 1311 01:37:09,130 --> 01:37:12,320 ♪ Why is the waiter smiling at us ♪ 1312 01:37:12,400 --> 01:37:15,520 ♪ He knows what we're thinking of ♪ 1313 01:37:15,600 --> 01:37:18,830 - ♪ Oh, can the tears ♪ - [ Both ] ♪ Cheers ♪ 1314 01:37:18,900 --> 01:37:24,000 ♪ Baby, here's to love ♪ 1315 01:37:24,070 --> 01:37:27,910 ♪ You've got the lips to wet my whistle ♪ 1316 01:37:27,980 --> 01:37:31,970 ♪ If that doesn't get ya maybe this'll ♪ 1317 01:37:32,050 --> 01:37:36,040 ♪ Cupid just launched a guided missile ♪ 1318 01:37:36,120 --> 01:37:39,320 [ Both ] ♪ Cheers, here's to love ♪ 1319 01:37:39,390 --> 01:37:43,380 ♪ Your eyes are so intoxicating ♪ 1320 01:37:43,460 --> 01:37:47,020 ♪ Bottoms up, babe let's get to mating ♪ 1321 01:37:47,100 --> 01:37:51,260 ♪ I bet it bears re-it-erating ♪ 1322 01:37:51,330 --> 01:37:54,630 [ Both ] ♪ Cheers, here's to love ♪ 1323 01:37:54,700 --> 01:37:58,160 ♪ Though it ain't New Year's pop the champagne ♪ 1324 01:37:58,240 --> 01:38:02,230 ♪ And let's take a spin on the floor ♪ 1325 01:38:02,310 --> 01:38:05,640 - ♪Your moves are good ♪ - ♪ I'm feelin' no pain ♪ 1326 01:38:05,710 --> 01:38:09,950 [ Both ] ♪ So let's pay the check and slip out the back door ♪ 1327 01:38:10,020 --> 01:38:13,720 ♪ We took Manhattan without the bitters ♪ 1328 01:38:13,790 --> 01:38:17,620 ♪ We're stayin' put ♪ ♪ Last call's for quitters ♪ 1329 01:38:17,690 --> 01:38:21,190 ♪ Soon it will be just baby-sitters ♪ 1330 01:38:21,260 --> 01:38:25,260 ♪ 'Cause this hawk's now a dove ♪ 1331 01:38:25,330 --> 01:38:28,460 ♪ Baby, the cab is blowin' its horn ♪ 1332 01:38:28,540 --> 01:38:31,840 ♪ But I can't find my hat and my gloves ♪ 1333 01:38:31,910 --> 01:38:34,930 - ♪ Oh, can the tears ♪ - [ Both ] ♪ Cheers ♪ 1334 01:38:35,010 --> 01:38:40,780 ♪ Baby, here's to love ♪ 1335 01:38:40,850 --> 01:38:43,580 - Here's mud in your eye. - Here's lookin' at you, kid. 1336 01:38:43,650 --> 01:38:46,450 - Here. This'll put hairs on your chest. - [ Chuckles ] 1337 01:38:46,520 --> 01:38:49,120 - Not that I would want that. - Mm-hmm. 1338 01:38:49,190 --> 01:38:53,090 ♪ Here's to love ♪♪ 1339 01:38:53,160 --> 01:38:56,530 [ Audience Applauding ] 110856