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# You must remember this
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# A kiss is still a kiss
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# A sigh is just a sigh
4
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# The fundamental things apply
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# As time goes by #
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Do you know something?
7
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I feel redundant.
8
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- Feel what?
- Redundant.
9
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- I'm only reading the paper.
- No, not here, I mean at the office.
10
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I feel it more and more.
11
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I think of something to do only to find
Judy or Sandy have already done it.
12
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That's good. They're showing initiative.
13
00:00:55,287 --> 00:00:57,801
I wish they wouldn't show so much.
14
00:00:59,847 --> 00:01:02,884
You don't think they're
trying to tell me something?
15
00:01:02,927 --> 00:01:05,600
I don't think
they're plotting to overthrow you.
16
00:01:05,647 --> 00:01:08,957
You don't think they're trying
to tell me I'm yesterday's woman?
17
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- Isn't that rather excessive?
- I don't know.
18
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- Perhaps I am.
- I think of you as my child bride.
19
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- Oh, do you?
- Well, not really, of course.
20
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But I certainly don't think of you
as yesterday's woman.
21
00:01:25,887 --> 00:01:29,084
- It's you coming back into my life.
- Are you saying I've aged you?
22
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I'm saying that before, you see...
23
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I'm not saying that work
was everything I had in my life.
24
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- No, of course not.
- But it was everything I had in my life.
25
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Now...
26
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Why don't you retire?
27
00:01:45,167 --> 00:01:47,397
- Retire?
- It's not a dirty word.
28
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To do what, take up crochet
or sequence dancing?
29
00:01:51,967 --> 00:01:54,242
You're being excessive again.
30
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For a start,
we could spend more time together.
31
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Have you retired, then?
32
00:01:59,367 --> 00:02:02,757
- I'm not sure, really.
- What if your miniseries is a success?
33
00:02:02,807 --> 00:02:04,923
- Fat chance.
- Never mind fat chance.
34
00:02:04,967 --> 00:02:07,606
What if it is and they ask you to write
something else?
35
00:02:07,647 --> 00:02:09,638
- The money's good.
- Exactly.
36
00:02:10,727 --> 00:02:14,356
You could be away working and I'd be
stuck back here doing my crochet.
37
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Crochet is your invention,
and why am I suddenly away working?
38
00:02:18,647 --> 00:02:23,118
- I work at home.
- You don't like being interrupted at work.
39
00:02:23,167 --> 00:02:26,125
No, but I'd still be here, wouldn't I?
40
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This sofa would be here.
I don't look on it as great company.
41
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I probably won't ever be asked
to write anything again.
42
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- That's a probably.
- Life's made up of probablys.
43
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That's one of those words. Say it a few times
and it ceases to be a real word.
44
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- Probably, probably, probably.
- You've gone right off the track.
45
00:02:45,287 --> 00:02:49,678
I'm not sure there ever was a track. All I said
was that I felt a bit redundant at the office.
46
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Which is where we came in.
47
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Don't get me wrong, I like being married.
48
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I'm very pleased to hear it.
49
00:02:58,007 --> 00:03:00,680
But I'm not a little-wifey sort of person.
50
00:03:00,727 --> 00:03:04,003
I'm not really sure that
I'm a little-hubby sort of person.
51
00:03:04,927 --> 00:03:07,282
Meaning you'd like to go on working.
52
00:03:07,327 --> 00:03:10,239
- If a miracle turns up, yes.
- But you'd like me to retire.
53
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It was only a suggestion.
54
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- You started this. I was reading the paper.
- What were you reading?
55
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- An article about crochet, actually.
- Oh!
56
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Don't!
57
00:03:24,407 --> 00:03:27,479
Hello, love. How was the film?
58
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Oh, it was sad, you know,
a bit of a weepie.
59
00:03:32,567 --> 00:03:35,639
- Did you enjoy the film, Sandy?
- Oh, very much.
60
00:03:35,687 --> 00:03:37,484
Funniest thing I've seen in ages.
61
00:03:40,367 --> 00:03:44,679
- You did see the same film?
- I just said it was a bit of a weepie.
62
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- Clang!
- I don't have to know where you were.
63
00:03:48,047 --> 00:03:50,800
All right. We didn't go and see a film.
64
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It's just we get so sick
and tired of going to see flats
65
00:03:53,287 --> 00:03:55,437
and coming back
and saying how awful they were.
66
00:03:55,487 --> 00:03:58,126
So you saw a flat. And?
67
00:03:58,167 --> 00:03:59,919
It was awful.
68
00:03:59,967 --> 00:04:03,118
Garden flat, it said.
You should've seen the garden.
69
00:04:03,167 --> 00:04:06,000
Six square feet of concrete
with a shrub in a tub.
70
00:04:06,047 --> 00:04:09,119
- A dead shrub.
- It was like a tiny prison exercise yard.
71
00:04:10,287 --> 00:04:14,565
- Hello, you two. How was the film?
- They've been to see a flat.
72
00:04:14,607 --> 00:04:18,122
- My memory must be going.
- No, we fibbed.
73
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- I see.
- Aren't you going to ask us why?
74
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No, I don't think I will.
75
00:04:22,847 --> 00:04:27,398
- So, what was the flat like?
- Ideally suited... to manic depressives.
76
00:04:27,447 --> 00:04:31,963
- Well, I think you should give up looking.
- Yes, that's what I said.
77
00:04:32,007 --> 00:04:35,124
Lionel has got used to living
with a monstrous regiment of women.
78
00:04:35,167 --> 00:04:40,116
I'll ignore that. The fact is
that we may not be here much longer.
79
00:04:40,967 --> 00:04:43,322
You're not talking about dying?
80
00:04:44,967 --> 00:04:47,276
I'm talking about
Rocky and Madge's house.
81
00:04:47,327 --> 00:04:49,557
Well, my house soon.
82
00:04:49,607 --> 00:04:51,563
Jean and I might be moving down there.
83
00:04:52,927 --> 00:04:55,202
- Permanently?
- I don't see why not.
84
00:04:55,247 --> 00:04:58,603
- Your mother's thinking of retiring.
- Retiring?
85
00:04:58,647 --> 00:05:02,845
- Are you really?
- Don't let your supper get cold.
86
00:05:07,567 --> 00:05:09,876
- Would you like a drink?
- No, thank you.
87
00:05:09,927 --> 00:05:13,522
I'd like one of those planes
that tows a big banner behind it.
88
00:05:13,567 --> 00:05:17,116
- I'm not supposed to understand that, am I?
- Big red letters. "Jean is retiring."
89
00:05:17,167 --> 00:05:19,965
Perhaps you'd like to announce it
on Radio 2.
90
00:05:20,007 --> 00:05:21,963
Two people I mentioned it to.
91
00:05:22,007 --> 00:05:25,124
Two people. I didn't say retiring.
I said "is thinking of retiring".
92
00:05:25,167 --> 00:05:27,317
- Who says I am?
- You did.
93
00:05:27,367 --> 00:05:31,645
No, I did not. All I said was I felt
a bit redundant at the office.
94
00:05:31,687 --> 00:05:34,042
Suddenly, I find you issuing
official statements.
95
00:05:36,527 --> 00:05:38,199
Where are you going?
96
00:05:38,247 --> 00:05:41,239
To retract the official statement
which I never made.
97
00:05:42,447 --> 00:05:47,441
Look, we don't want Jean to agonise
about which one of us gets her job.
98
00:05:47,487 --> 00:05:49,603
We could run the office between us.
99
00:05:49,647 --> 00:05:52,320
Yeah, of course we could.
100
00:05:52,367 --> 00:05:54,358
Which one of us gets her desk?
101
00:05:56,367 --> 00:06:00,724
Forget everything I said.
Jean has absolutely no intention of retiring.
102
00:06:00,767 --> 00:06:02,644
Oh.
103
00:06:02,687 --> 00:06:04,678
But I am thinking about it.
104
00:06:11,087 --> 00:06:14,602
- We're off to the shops.
- Oh, right. You won't forget...
105
00:06:14,647 --> 00:06:17,605
- Lionel's custards tarts? No.
- They're top of the list.
106
00:06:17,647 --> 00:06:19,638
Right, bye, then.
107
00:06:21,727 --> 00:06:23,365
Well?
108
00:06:23,407 --> 00:06:27,958
- Look, Mum, we don't want you to retire.
- No, of course we don't.
109
00:06:28,007 --> 00:06:30,885
We don't want you to feel
any pressure from either of us.
110
00:06:30,927 --> 00:06:34,283
Just because we're young,
vibrant, ambitious.
111
00:06:34,327 --> 00:06:37,080
- We'd miss you.
- Professionally?
112
00:06:37,127 --> 00:06:39,357
- Of course we would.
- A lot.
113
00:06:39,407 --> 00:06:42,240
- That came out very quickly, didn't it?
- All right.
114
00:06:42,287 --> 00:06:46,485
If you want an honest answer,
I suppose we could get by without you.
115
00:06:46,527 --> 00:06:49,087
- Oh!
- That doesn't mean to say we want to.
116
00:06:49,127 --> 00:06:51,641
It wouldn't be the same. Less bullying.
117
00:06:51,687 --> 00:06:53,803
- But it wouldn't be the same.
- Oh, go shopping!
118
00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:55,838
I'll go.
119
00:06:55,887 --> 00:06:59,038
Truly, Mum.
We really don't want you to retire.
120
00:06:59,087 --> 00:07:02,875
I know. But Lionel does. Oh, go on.
121
00:07:03,967 --> 00:07:05,798
Hi, Li.
122
00:07:05,847 --> 00:07:09,601
Are we in business,
or are we in business?
123
00:07:10,207 --> 00:07:13,165
- I don't know, I don't know.
- Hello, Alistair.
124
00:07:14,127 --> 00:07:16,516
- Hey, hey.
- We're going shopping.
125
00:07:16,567 --> 00:07:18,876
Something soft and sexy, I hope.
126
00:07:18,927 --> 00:07:21,885
Depends on how you feel
about custard tarts. Bye.
127
00:07:21,927 --> 00:07:23,280
Bye.
128
00:07:24,327 --> 00:07:27,000
- Now, was that called for?
- Yes, it was, actually.
129
00:07:27,047 --> 00:07:28,799
Go through.
130
00:07:29,807 --> 00:07:33,322
- Hello, Alistair.
- He's asking questions I don't understand.
131
00:07:33,367 --> 00:07:36,439
All I said was, "Are we in business,
or are we in business?"
132
00:07:36,487 --> 00:07:39,445
That's a debatable point at the moment.
133
00:07:39,487 --> 00:07:43,241
- What do you know that I don't know?
- I'm just thinking of something else.
134
00:07:43,287 --> 00:07:46,484
- I assume you mean the filming?
- Do I mean the filming?
135
00:07:46,527 --> 00:07:49,963
- Well, do you or don't you?
- Yes, Li.
136
00:07:50,007 --> 00:07:52,999
Everything's going so... hey...
137
00:07:53,047 --> 00:07:55,880
And the people, everyone's so... you know.
138
00:07:57,047 --> 00:07:59,845
There were no adjectives
in that sentence.
139
00:07:59,887 --> 00:08:02,082
How about superb, wonderful, brilliant?
140
00:08:02,127 --> 00:08:04,118
- How about telling the truth?
- Would I lie...
141
00:08:04,167 --> 00:08:05,646
Li?
142
00:08:06,447 --> 00:08:08,961
Listen, Mike Barbosa is so thrilled
143
00:08:09,007 --> 00:08:12,317
that he's invited you to your father's house
tomorrow to see the filming.
144
00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:15,564
Lionel doesn't have to be invited
to his own father's house.
145
00:08:15,607 --> 00:08:20,476
Particularly by an American television
executive only just out of short trousers.
146
00:08:20,527 --> 00:08:23,360
And in case the child has forgotten,
Lionel's the author.
147
00:08:23,407 --> 00:08:27,082
Can we cease fire, hmm?
I thought you'd be thrilled.
148
00:08:27,127 --> 00:08:29,766
This is your chance to see your words
coming off the page.
149
00:08:29,807 --> 00:08:32,162
Assuming any of my words
are left on the page.
150
00:08:32,207 --> 00:08:34,675
You can be very cynical sometimes, Li.
151
00:08:34,727 --> 00:08:36,922
Now, you will both come, won't you?
152
00:08:36,967 --> 00:08:40,801
- I suppose I have to see it sometime.
- Not the most enthusiastic yes.
153
00:08:40,847 --> 00:08:43,566
- It's the best I can do.
- I suppose it could be quite funny.
154
00:08:43,607 --> 00:08:44,960
Funny?
155
00:08:45,007 --> 00:08:48,716
Seeing somebody else pretending to be us.
Perhaps odd is a better word.
156
00:08:48,767 --> 00:08:52,203
Yeah, that's a thought.
Who are pretending to be us?
157
00:08:52,247 --> 00:08:54,283
Wait for this.
158
00:08:54,327 --> 00:08:57,558
Jake Paris and Beverley Branch.
159
00:08:57,607 --> 00:09:00,326
- Never heard of them.
- Can they act?
160
00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:03,040
Can they act? Can they act?
161
00:09:03,087 --> 00:09:08,241
OK, they may not be household names yet
but Beverley Branch is a budding actress.
162
00:09:11,527 --> 00:09:14,200
Believe me, they are going to be big.
163
00:09:14,247 --> 00:09:16,920
- What, Beverley Branch?
- Jake Paris?
164
00:09:16,967 --> 00:09:20,721
Here's an idea. Why not ask
Judy and Sandy down as well?
165
00:09:20,767 --> 00:09:23,156
- I expect they'd like that.
- Great!
166
00:09:23,207 --> 00:09:25,880
So I'll pick you all up about ten, OK?
167
00:09:25,927 --> 00:09:28,202
- Thanks, Alistair.
- I'll see myself out.
168
00:09:28,247 --> 00:09:32,365
- This Jake Paris...
- Think of him as a young...
169
00:09:32,407 --> 00:09:34,557
William Lundigan. Ciao.
170
00:09:35,687 --> 00:09:39,726
- Who the hell's William Lundigan?
- Goodness knows.
171
00:09:39,767 --> 00:09:42,565
But he must've looked a bit like Jake Paris.
172
00:09:42,607 --> 00:09:45,280
I wonder what Beverley Branch looks like.
173
00:09:45,327 --> 00:09:48,876
I shouldn't.
None of it's going to look like us.
174
00:09:48,927 --> 00:09:52,044
I doubt if it'll bear much resemblance
to what I wrote at all.
175
00:09:52,087 --> 00:09:54,840
I probably shan't end up going to Korea.
176
00:09:54,887 --> 00:09:58,118
I shall probably trot off
with Wellington to Waterloo.
177
00:09:58,807 --> 00:10:01,116
- Prettier uniforms.
- And you won't be a nurse.
178
00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:04,364
You'll probably end up as a camp follower.
179
00:10:04,407 --> 00:10:09,435
- Hope I'm one of the better-class ones.
- You're taking this all very lightly.
180
00:10:09,487 --> 00:10:13,526
So should you. You told me you'd reached
a stage where you didn't care.
181
00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:15,637
I know, but I've been thinking.
182
00:10:15,687 --> 00:10:20,044
If this epic turns out to be the shambles
I think it's going to be,
183
00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:22,647
nobody's ever going to ask me
to write anything again.
184
00:10:22,687 --> 00:10:26,043
That wouldn't be the end of the world,
would it?
185
00:10:26,087 --> 00:10:29,284
- No, I suppose not.
- And if it did happen...
186
00:10:30,727 --> 00:10:32,718
you could always retire.
187
00:10:51,487 --> 00:10:55,400
Hey, you guys, terrific to see you.
Really terrific.
188
00:10:55,447 --> 00:10:57,642
Come and say hello to some of the crew.
189
00:10:57,687 --> 00:11:02,636
A really great crew, I might add.
This is Nigel, Chris, Peter, Kevin,
190
00:11:02,687 --> 00:11:05,121
Mandy and Pam, and over here we have
191
00:11:05,167 --> 00:11:09,524
Ben, Shorty...
No, that's not Shorty. That's Curly.
192
00:11:09,567 --> 00:11:11,797
And there's Marianne.
193
00:11:11,847 --> 00:11:14,077
- Did you get all that?
- Oh, yes.
194
00:11:14,127 --> 00:11:15,606
And this...
195
00:11:15,647 --> 00:11:18,957
this is our director Moses Crispiani.
196
00:11:19,007 --> 00:11:21,805
- Hello.
- Why do we do it?
197
00:11:21,847 --> 00:11:25,123
You tell me. Why do we do it?
198
00:11:25,167 --> 00:11:30,036
- He's a cheerful soul, isn't he?
- Do we have a problem, Moses?
199
00:11:30,087 --> 00:11:34,877
- We're waiting for the light.
- A religious conversion of some sort?
200
00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:40,837
Moses, this is Lionel Hardcastle
and his wife, Jean.
201
00:11:40,887 --> 00:11:44,436
- Lionel is the writer.
- How do you do?
202
00:11:44,487 --> 00:11:46,762
Right. Great script.
203
00:11:47,527 --> 00:11:49,677
Great script.
204
00:11:49,727 --> 00:11:52,082
Why doesn't that cloud go away?
205
00:11:52,927 --> 00:11:56,715
I would have thought with a name like Moses,
he could have fixed that.
206
00:11:58,207 --> 00:12:01,517
- It's moving now.
- That's because Alistair's arrived.
207
00:12:01,567 --> 00:12:03,956
Al's right. The cloud is moving.
208
00:12:04,007 --> 00:12:06,726
OK, listen up, everybody.
The cloud is moving.
209
00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:09,679
Stand by. Come on, let's go.
210
00:12:12,087 --> 00:12:15,796
Some time today, Nigel.
Shorty, take both chairs.
211
00:12:15,847 --> 00:12:18,236
Excitable lot, aren't they?
212
00:12:18,287 --> 00:12:20,926
OK, everybody, let's go for it.
213
00:12:20,967 --> 00:12:23,800
- Quiet!
- Which bit are they doing?
214
00:12:23,847 --> 00:12:25,963
When Lionel's saying
goodbye to his father.
215
00:12:26,007 --> 00:12:29,044
- The father comes through the door...
- Quiet!
216
00:12:32,727 --> 00:12:33,796
Action!
217
00:12:38,647 --> 00:12:40,205
Cut! Cut! Cut!
218
00:12:41,167 --> 00:12:42,919
Why is he in hunting pink?
219
00:12:45,967 --> 00:12:49,960
- Why the cut, Moses?
- Am I the only one with eyes around here?
220
00:12:50,007 --> 00:12:52,362
There's something moving
in the window behind him.
221
00:12:56,167 --> 00:12:58,397
I think Madge must be at home.
222
00:12:59,367 --> 00:13:01,597
Stay cool. Stay cool. I'll sort it out.
223
00:13:01,647 --> 00:13:07,085
- I told you, we could have shot this in LA!
- OK, I'll sort it out. Excuse me, ladies.
224
00:13:08,007 --> 00:13:10,646
I thought that would stop them.
225
00:13:10,687 --> 00:13:15,078
- You're being a damn nuisance.
- I sincerely hope so.
226
00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:16,719
That's the spirit.
227
00:13:18,767 --> 00:13:21,327
Give me a break.
Please. You're costing us money.
228
00:13:21,367 --> 00:13:23,358
I do not give a fig.
229
00:13:24,647 --> 00:13:27,036
- Rocky?
- There's no budging her.
230
00:13:27,087 --> 00:13:29,317
She's anti-hunting, and that's it.
231
00:13:29,367 --> 00:13:33,076
- But there is no hunting scene.
- Sorry, I'm simply not having it.
232
00:13:33,127 --> 00:13:36,802
Put him in some other clothes
or I persist with my placard.
233
00:13:36,847 --> 00:13:38,838
And I shall make one of my own.
234
00:13:38,887 --> 00:13:40,878
I'll have a word with Moses.
235
00:13:42,767 --> 00:13:44,359
What did you say, young man?
236
00:13:46,407 --> 00:13:50,446
- What is it, Mrs Bale?
- Mr and Mrs Hardcastle Junior.
237
00:13:51,287 --> 00:13:54,597
You don't have to announce them,
you silly old trout.
238
00:13:55,967 --> 00:13:58,276
- Hello, you young people.
- Hello, dears.
239
00:13:58,327 --> 00:14:01,205
- Lovely to see you both.
- We thought it was you.
240
00:14:01,247 --> 00:14:06,446
- I say, you've got Mike in a bit of a tizz.
- He can tizz away to his heart's content.
241
00:14:06,487 --> 00:14:11,277
- I didn't write you in hunting pink.
- No, no, that was Solomon's idea.
242
00:14:11,327 --> 00:14:13,477
- Moses.
- That's it...
243
00:14:13,527 --> 00:14:16,519
- That's the fellow.
- He's not in too good a mood either.
244
00:14:16,567 --> 00:14:19,240
He's a sullen cove at the best of times.
245
00:14:19,287 --> 00:14:22,324
I have to say, I feel responsible
for that crowd being here.
246
00:14:22,367 --> 00:14:25,279
Oh, don't worry, it's rather fun, really.
247
00:14:25,327 --> 00:14:28,683
I must say, Rocky's taken
rather a shine to those little make-up girls.
248
00:14:29,607 --> 00:14:34,761
What about you, my girl? Giggling away
all the time with that best man.
249
00:14:34,807 --> 00:14:38,686
- Are you sure you mean best man?
- He means best boy.
250
00:14:38,727 --> 00:14:41,605
I've seen that on film credits.
What does he actually do?
251
00:14:41,647 --> 00:14:44,878
I don't know exactly
but he's very personable.
252
00:14:44,927 --> 00:14:49,443
I could've told them about the clouds
when I listened to the shipping forecast.
253
00:14:49,487 --> 00:14:51,478
Why didn't you, Mrs Bale?
254
00:14:51,527 --> 00:14:56,157
Because I've heard that Moses person
describe me as "domestic".
255
00:14:56,207 --> 00:15:00,280
- Enough said.
- I hope these are suitably explosive.
256
00:15:00,327 --> 00:15:03,478
They should be.
They're called Tahitian volcanoes.
257
00:15:04,527 --> 00:15:08,486
I shall be serving a buffet luncheon
at 1:23.
258
00:15:09,807 --> 00:15:13,641
Unless any of us intend
to sneak out to that charabanc.
259
00:15:14,887 --> 00:15:18,163
- Did she say charabanc?
- Yes, it's a sort of bus, dear.
260
00:15:18,207 --> 00:15:22,166
- Where all the film people eat.
- We have sneaked off there a few times.
261
00:15:22,207 --> 00:15:26,166
- It's jolly good grub.
- OK, you win.
262
00:15:26,207 --> 00:15:28,641
The hunting suit is out.
263
00:15:28,687 --> 00:15:31,997
More important, the sun is out.
Come on, Jean, Lionel, let's go see a movie.
264
00:15:32,047 --> 00:15:34,003
- I've just got comfortable.
- Oh, come on.
265
00:15:34,047 --> 00:15:39,644
Oh, all right. Oh, Mike. I've been meaning
to ask, what exactly is your role in all this?
266
00:15:39,687 --> 00:15:44,203
Co-executive deputy
supervising associate producer.
267
00:15:46,927 --> 00:15:48,918
Well, you did ask.
268
00:15:52,767 --> 00:15:57,204
So come on, straight. Are you
really finished with Alistair or not?
269
00:15:58,047 --> 00:16:00,038
No comment.
270
00:16:00,087 --> 00:16:02,885
It's not the press you're talking to, it's me.
271
00:16:04,687 --> 00:16:06,757
I don't know, Sandy.
272
00:16:06,807 --> 00:16:11,642
I do like him but it was like going out with
a jumping cracker. He's all over the place.
273
00:16:11,687 --> 00:16:15,362
Yes, but, you know, when you're around,
274
00:16:15,407 --> 00:16:18,319
he doesn't have eyes
for anybody else at all.
275
00:16:19,207 --> 00:16:21,198
- Are you sure?
- Honestly.
276
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:26,486
- Well, perhaps if we...
- What?
277
00:16:30,567 --> 00:16:32,398
Oh...
278
00:16:32,447 --> 00:16:34,642
He wants to play doctors and nurses.
279
00:16:35,767 --> 00:16:40,921
Hey, you two! Come and say hi
to Beverley Branch.
280
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:43,162
She's playing your mother, Judy.
281
00:16:49,167 --> 00:16:51,237
OK, let's have quiet everywhere.
282
00:16:54,887 --> 00:16:57,447
Hey, I said everywhere.
283
00:16:59,607 --> 00:17:00,801
Action!
284
00:17:07,607 --> 00:17:11,566
Move it, son.
England expects, and all that rot.
285
00:17:11,607 --> 00:17:13,598
- What?
- Coming, Dad.
286
00:17:13,647 --> 00:17:15,763
Oh, there we are.
287
00:17:15,807 --> 00:17:17,877
Where did they come from? Cut! Cut!
288
00:17:17,927 --> 00:17:19,758
What the hell are you people doing?
289
00:17:19,807 --> 00:17:23,277
- A stroll before lunch.
- You're in the shot.
290
00:17:23,327 --> 00:17:26,239
- Is there anything you'd like us to do?
- Yes.
291
00:17:26,287 --> 00:17:28,881
Get the hell out of my shot.
292
00:17:28,927 --> 00:17:33,079
Your manners, young man,
leave a great deal to be desired.
293
00:17:38,327 --> 00:17:41,364
- I feel almost sorry for Moses.
- I don't.
294
00:17:41,407 --> 00:17:45,195
- "And all that rot, what?"
- Tiny change, Li.
295
00:17:45,247 --> 00:17:48,080
OK, we're going again. Quiet!
296
00:17:48,127 --> 00:17:50,800
- Action!
- Move it, son.
297
00:17:50,847 --> 00:17:53,281
England expects, and all that rot. What?
298
00:17:58,287 --> 00:18:00,437
Did you say goodbye to Mama?
299
00:18:00,487 --> 00:18:03,081
Sure. And the staff.
300
00:18:03,127 --> 00:18:06,278
Poor old Nanny Lightfoot's
blubbing in the nursery.
301
00:18:06,327 --> 00:18:08,557
Ah, jeez, that's sad.
302
00:18:08,607 --> 00:18:11,405
Well, what time
is your train to London station?
303
00:18:11,447 --> 00:18:14,484
- A quarter of 12.
- You best be hopping it, then.
304
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:18,884
It's a shame Jean couldn't stop by
to say cheer-ho.
305
00:18:18,927 --> 00:18:23,125
I guess a nurse's job...
Just a blooming tick!
306
00:18:23,167 --> 00:18:25,840
- Who's that?
- It's Jean.
307
00:18:25,887 --> 00:18:27,559
Lionel!
308
00:18:29,727 --> 00:18:32,116
- Jean!
- Lionel!
309
00:18:33,687 --> 00:18:36,884
- Jean...
- Lionel...
310
00:18:41,567 --> 00:18:43,797
Cut! That's right.
311
00:18:43,847 --> 00:18:46,645
Terrific, I smell Emmy.
312
00:18:46,687 --> 00:18:49,201
Doesn't it just tear at the heart strings?
313
00:18:56,327 --> 00:18:59,046
I never wore a skirt like that.
314
00:19:00,207 --> 00:19:02,767
It looks like something
out of a Carry On film.
315
00:19:03,687 --> 00:19:06,406
I looked like something
out of a comic opera.
316
00:19:06,447 --> 00:19:10,565
How are you supposed to have got down
to Hampshire? There wasn't even a car.
317
00:19:10,607 --> 00:19:13,405
I ran all the way
from the Middlesex Hospital.
318
00:19:14,247 --> 00:19:16,124
London station.
319
00:19:16,167 --> 00:19:18,806
I mean, London station?
320
00:19:18,847 --> 00:19:21,680
Minor alterations to the script, they said.
321
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:24,799
The only word I remember writing
in that scene is "Dad".
322
00:19:26,567 --> 00:19:28,637
There's no chance
that it could be a joke?
323
00:19:28,687 --> 00:19:31,724
- Every chance.
- No, a joke as in prank.
324
00:19:31,767 --> 00:19:34,679
Does Moses strike you
as the sort of man who plays pranks?
325
00:19:34,727 --> 00:19:38,959
- I'm just whistling in the wind.
- Hi, everybody.
326
00:19:39,927 --> 00:19:41,918
You didn't like it, did you?
327
00:19:41,967 --> 00:19:43,878
Well, any of it?
328
00:19:43,927 --> 00:19:48,637
Yes, I liked the bit where Madge and Rocky
and Mrs Bale walked through the shot.
329
00:19:50,487 --> 00:19:54,241
- "You're in shot!"
- "Is there anything you'd like us to do?"
330
00:19:54,287 --> 00:19:56,482
"Yes, get the hell out of shot."
331
00:19:56,527 --> 00:19:59,121
"Your manners leave a lot to be desired,
young man."
332
00:20:00,007 --> 00:20:04,637
And all that going on with poor old
Nanny Lightfoot, who never even existed,
333
00:20:04,687 --> 00:20:07,042
blubbing her eyes out in the nursery!
334
00:20:07,847 --> 00:20:11,886
- Hey! You've lightened up.
- Yeah...
335
00:20:11,927 --> 00:20:15,283
Well, we have to treat it as a joke
or I'll go out and shoot myself.
336
00:20:15,327 --> 00:20:19,081
I didn't know it had got so far away
from the original. Really, I didn't.
337
00:20:19,127 --> 00:20:21,880
The script I've got
is only the fourth revision.
338
00:20:21,927 --> 00:20:23,804
What revision are they working from now?
339
00:20:23,847 --> 00:20:26,725
The 12th, actually.
340
00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:30,555
I assume that you had a hand
in casting Beverley Branch?
341
00:20:30,607 --> 00:20:35,237
I had nothing to do with that.
Really, I didn't.
342
00:20:35,287 --> 00:20:38,324
- If you have to look like someone on film...
- Oh, true.
343
00:20:38,367 --> 00:20:41,120
I can claim she looked
the spitting image of me as a girl.
344
00:20:42,127 --> 00:20:44,561
Hey, what are all you guys
doing in here?
345
00:20:44,607 --> 00:20:46,996
- Hiding, originally.
- Then we decided to have a laugh.
346
00:20:47,047 --> 00:20:48,958
Oh, great. What about?
347
00:20:49,007 --> 00:20:51,601
That travesty we've just watched out there.
348
00:20:53,847 --> 00:20:57,760
Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I had no idea
those people were gonna cross shot.
349
00:20:57,807 --> 00:20:59,559
Not them! The scene.
350
00:21:00,327 --> 00:21:01,965
- Travesty?
- Farce.
351
00:21:02,007 --> 00:21:04,521
- Mess.
- Twaddle.
352
00:21:04,567 --> 00:21:06,558
Alistair?
353
00:21:07,487 --> 00:21:13,244
I have to say this, Mike. I really, really hope
you know what you're doing.
354
00:21:13,287 --> 00:21:16,006
- Trust me.
- That's what I kept telling Lionel.
355
00:21:16,047 --> 00:21:20,484
- The only problem is that you're British.
- We don't find that a problem.
356
00:21:22,087 --> 00:21:26,285
Let me finish. You have to remember
that this show is aimed at a US market.
357
00:21:26,327 --> 00:21:30,320
- Say you were a potato farmer from Idaho.
- That's a stretch of the imagination.
358
00:21:30,367 --> 00:21:34,963
But say you were. You'd have to have
a picture of England you could relate to.
359
00:21:35,007 --> 00:21:38,204
- Peculiar people in Idaho.
- OK, Mary Poppins.
360
00:21:38,247 --> 00:21:41,398
She doesn't fly in at the end of the film,
does she?
361
00:21:41,447 --> 00:21:46,601
Lionel, please. Do you remember Dick Van
Dyke's cockney accent in Mary Poppins?
362
00:21:46,647 --> 00:21:50,276
- I'd sooner not, really.
- That's because you're British.
363
00:21:50,327 --> 00:21:54,525
To that potato farmer in Idaho,
that was cockney.
364
00:21:54,567 --> 00:22:00,244
- You know, that makes a lot of sense.
- Let's just hang on to that thought.
365
00:22:00,287 --> 00:22:02,721
What I... Excuse me.
366
00:22:06,727 --> 00:22:10,640
Sorry, I have to go.
Those people just crossed shot again.
367
00:22:13,887 --> 00:22:15,718
Are you sure you're not coming out again?
368
00:22:15,767 --> 00:22:18,327
They're doing the scene
where you come home from Korea.
369
00:22:18,367 --> 00:22:21,040
Yes, there was talk of you losing an arm.
370
00:22:21,087 --> 00:22:23,043
Really?
371
00:22:23,087 --> 00:22:27,365
- You didn't bat an eyelid then.
- I don't think I have an eyelid left to bat.
372
00:22:27,407 --> 00:22:31,480
Well, Sandy and I are going.
After all, it's not dull, is it?
373
00:22:31,527 --> 00:22:34,325
We'll let you know about the arm.
374
00:22:35,047 --> 00:22:37,277
- Ready, Madge?
- Oh, absolutely.
375
00:22:37,327 --> 00:22:39,602
I know there was something
I wanted to tell you.
376
00:22:39,647 --> 00:22:41,763
It's about you getting the house.
377
00:22:41,807 --> 00:22:44,879
- You've changed your minds?
- Stuff and nonsense, of course not.
378
00:22:44,927 --> 00:22:48,363
Madge and I will be
leaving in two weeks' time.
379
00:22:48,407 --> 00:22:51,365
- Oh, I see.
- You can always change your minds.
380
00:22:51,407 --> 00:22:53,523
Oh, no, we can't wait to go!
381
00:22:53,567 --> 00:22:58,641
You won't mind if we take the pin table,
will you?
382
00:22:59,567 --> 00:23:01,603
I don't think I'd use it a lot.
383
00:23:01,647 --> 00:23:03,683
You said you were going to Lithuania.
384
00:23:03,727 --> 00:23:06,161
No, we're putting that on hold for a bit.
385
00:23:06,207 --> 00:23:09,279
We've actually found a travel agency
that does tours to Mongolia.
386
00:23:09,327 --> 00:23:12,524
- We thought we might give that a crack.
- Mongolia?
387
00:23:12,567 --> 00:23:15,718
- Inner or Outer?
- Oh, both, hopefully.
388
00:23:15,767 --> 00:23:17,280
Rock on.
389
00:23:17,327 --> 00:23:20,717
Remember what I said, my boy,
don't feel you're obliged to move in.
390
00:23:20,767 --> 00:23:23,361
Just use it as a retreat, if you like.
391
00:23:23,407 --> 00:23:29,357
I mean, it's all very nice down here
but it can get a bit on the dull side.
392
00:23:30,487 --> 00:23:33,604
- See you later.
- You won't walk through the shot again?
393
00:23:33,647 --> 00:23:36,081
Only if the mood takes us.
394
00:23:42,407 --> 00:23:46,400
- I wonder if I do lose an arm.
- You probably lose your whole body.
395
00:23:46,447 --> 00:23:48,358
All that comes back from Korea
is your head.
396
00:23:48,407 --> 00:23:53,845
- You'd carry me about in a cardboard box.
- Be careful not to leave you anywhere.
397
00:23:53,887 --> 00:23:56,799
Do you think the Korean scenes
are going to be filmed in Korea?
398
00:23:56,847 --> 00:23:59,839
I heard Wales mentioned.
399
00:23:59,887 --> 00:24:02,560
Well, I hope
that potato farmer in Idaho likes it.
400
00:24:02,607 --> 00:24:04,598
He's becoming crucially important,
that man.
401
00:24:04,647 --> 00:24:09,084
- I'd thought you'd like some coffee.
- You're a treasure, Mrs Bale.
402
00:24:09,127 --> 00:24:13,837
One does one's best.
But if I am to stay on as housekeeper,
403
00:24:13,887 --> 00:24:16,481
there is something I think
you ought to know.
404
00:24:16,527 --> 00:24:20,600
- What's that?
- I am over 40.
405
00:24:23,447 --> 00:24:27,042
- Good gracious.
- I mean, if you'd prefer someone younger.
406
00:24:27,087 --> 00:24:29,442
Don't be silly, of course we wouldn't,
would we?
407
00:24:29,487 --> 00:24:30,920
No!
408
00:24:30,967 --> 00:24:33,800
Anyway, we shall probably
only be down here at weekends.
409
00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:37,078
- I just thought it should be said.
- Well, we appreciate it.
410
00:24:39,567 --> 00:24:42,081
We'll probably only be down here
at weekends?
411
00:24:42,127 --> 00:24:45,642
- I've been thinking.
- You don't want to retire, do you?
412
00:24:46,407 --> 00:24:48,079
No.
413
00:24:48,127 --> 00:24:53,599
I mean, it's lovely down here,
but what would we do with ourselves?
414
00:24:53,647 --> 00:24:57,356
I don't know. Just take it easy, I suppose.
415
00:24:57,407 --> 00:25:00,285
- Sit in our rocking chairs?
- I didn't mention rocking chairs.
416
00:25:00,327 --> 00:25:01,885
What, then?
417
00:25:01,927 --> 00:25:04,964
Well... we could stroll down to the village
sometimes.
418
00:25:05,807 --> 00:25:08,958
Yes. Then we could stroll back.
419
00:25:10,207 --> 00:25:11,322
Obviously.
420
00:25:11,367 --> 00:25:13,961
Sometimes, when we've strolled
down to the village,
421
00:25:14,007 --> 00:25:17,079
we could stroll round the village
before we stroll back.
422
00:25:17,127 --> 00:25:18,958
All right, you've made your point.
423
00:25:19,007 --> 00:25:21,805
No, but really, it's important.
424
00:25:21,847 --> 00:25:23,644
Why?
425
00:25:23,687 --> 00:25:26,076
Because I love you.
426
00:25:26,127 --> 00:25:29,437
If you think you're going
to get round me that way, you are.
427
00:25:30,967 --> 00:25:32,958
But it's just as well, isn't it?
428
00:25:33,847 --> 00:25:36,361
- I suppose it is.
- You see...
429
00:25:36,407 --> 00:25:39,444
I think that loving someone
is being your best for them.
430
00:25:40,447 --> 00:25:42,722
I know I get fed up
with the office sometimes
431
00:25:42,767 --> 00:25:44,917
and I know
I get ratty when I come home sometimes
432
00:25:44,967 --> 00:25:47,083
but I never get bored.
433
00:25:47,127 --> 00:25:49,436
I think if I got bored, then I'd get boring.
434
00:25:51,167 --> 00:25:54,000
- What about you?
- Oh, not much of a problem.
435
00:25:54,047 --> 00:25:56,242
I'm boring all the time.
436
00:25:56,287 --> 00:25:59,438
- No, you're not.
- I'm not an Alistair sort of person, am I?
437
00:25:59,487 --> 00:26:02,047
I couldn't deal with an Alistair.
I'd crack up.
438
00:26:02,087 --> 00:26:05,966
No, I meant by "What about you?",
what do you think?
439
00:26:07,287 --> 00:26:09,278
I think you're right.
440
00:26:10,127 --> 00:26:14,882
I think I'll just enjoy
as much as I can of you in London
441
00:26:14,927 --> 00:26:17,361
and all of you down here at the weekends.
442
00:26:18,527 --> 00:26:20,518
Oh, I like that bit.
443
00:26:22,047 --> 00:26:25,960
- What about the girls?
- I don't want them here every weekend.
444
00:26:26,007 --> 00:26:28,237
I mean, what about them
living with us in London?
445
00:26:28,287 --> 00:26:30,596
Well, I've almost got used to it.
446
00:26:30,647 --> 00:26:34,435
But don't tell them.
They'll think I've gone soft.
447
00:26:34,487 --> 00:26:36,478
No, well, we wouldn't want that.
448
00:26:39,407 --> 00:26:41,159
Where are you going?
449
00:26:41,207 --> 00:26:43,880
Well, against my better judgement,
450
00:26:43,927 --> 00:26:48,125
I do want to know if I come back from Korea
with two arms.
451
00:26:48,167 --> 00:26:51,159
- Do you?
- I don't know.
452
00:26:51,207 --> 00:26:53,243
They're just milling about.
453
00:26:54,087 --> 00:26:56,282
It's all they seem to do most of the time.
454
00:26:58,447 --> 00:27:02,565
Oh, I'm sorry they've ruined your story,
Lionel.
455
00:27:02,607 --> 00:27:06,122
It's our story. And nobody can ruin it.
456
00:27:06,807 --> 00:27:10,595
Of course, the first bit, when we were young,
and this bit, when we were...
457
00:27:10,647 --> 00:27:15,846
well, slightly older...
they're rather good, really, aren't they?
458
00:27:15,887 --> 00:27:17,798
No, they're very good.
459
00:27:20,047 --> 00:27:23,278
Oh, look, somebody's waving at us.
Oh, it's Moses.
460
00:27:23,327 --> 00:27:25,682
Hello.
461
00:27:25,727 --> 00:27:27,718
I don't think it's that sort of wave.
462
00:27:31,007 --> 00:27:34,716
- Can we be of any assistance?
- You're in shot!
463
00:27:34,767 --> 00:27:36,519
You're in the shot!
464
00:27:36,567 --> 00:27:38,956
Well, hard luck!
465
00:27:42,047 --> 00:27:43,924
Oh, let's leave them to it.
466
00:27:45,007 --> 00:27:46,998
I know somewhere we won't be in shot.
467
00:27:56,767 --> 00:27:59,486
# You must remember this
468
00:27:59,527 --> 00:28:02,121
# A kiss is still a kiss
469
00:28:02,167 --> 00:28:05,364
# A sigh is just a sigh
470
00:28:07,607 --> 00:28:10,997
# The fundamental things apply
471
00:28:11,047 --> 00:28:14,437
# As time goes by
472
00:28:18,487 --> 00:28:21,126
# And when two lovers woo
473
00:28:21,167 --> 00:28:23,840
# They still say I love you
474
00:28:23,887 --> 00:28:26,447
# On that you can rely
475
00:28:29,487 --> 00:28:33,116
# The world will always welcome lovers
476
00:28:35,207 --> 00:28:42,887
# As time goes by #
477
00:28:43,887 --> 00:28:53,887
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