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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back
Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday
2
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:28,099
My sister Kate learned to
swim when most babies...
3
00:02:28,129 --> 00:02:31,101
were still gnawing the
sides of their playpens.
4
00:02:31,539 --> 00:02:33,769
I adore her. Everybody does.
5
00:02:34,001 --> 00:02:34,801
The day she was born,
6
00:02:34,831 --> 00:02:36,440
I wanted to name her after Saint Gobnet,
7
00:02:36,470 --> 00:02:38,002
the virgin beekeeper,
8
00:02:38,214 --> 00:02:41,672
But mother, Mrs. Flax, thought
I was a little peculiar.
9
00:02:41,817 --> 00:02:42,841
I don't agree.
10
00:03:13,419 --> 00:03:16,752
Mrs. Flax doesn't believe
in ritual or tradition.
11
00:03:23,630 --> 00:03:24,630
No.
12
00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:34,909
Maybe.
13
00:03:40,850 --> 00:03:41,850
I think so.
14
00:03:44,509 --> 00:03:46,568
But I'd wanted to repent
since the first time...
15
00:03:46,598 --> 00:03:48,689
I saw a girl with ashes on her forehead...
16
00:03:48,719 --> 00:03:50,749
cross herself and chant Hail Marys...
17
00:03:50,779 --> 00:03:52,227
before a spelling bee.
18
00:03:54,210 --> 00:03:55,410
Charlotte, we're Jewish.
19
00:04:05,991 --> 00:04:07,071
What is this?
20
00:04:07,212 --> 00:04:09,874
Cheese ball pick-me-ups
accompanied by miniature franks,
21
00:04:10,015 --> 00:04:13,747
and, for dessert... marshmallow kabobs.
22
00:04:16,155 --> 00:04:18,392
A word about Mrs. Flax and food.
23
00:04:18,422 --> 00:04:20,753
The word is hors d'oeuvres.
24
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:23,192
"Fun Finger Foods" is her main source book,
25
00:04:23,330 --> 00:04:25,298
and that's all the woman cooks.
26
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:28,561
"Anything more," she says,
"is too big a commitment."
27
00:04:35,944 --> 00:04:38,344
It's Fred. Okay, how do I look?
28
00:04:38,415 --> 00:04:40,415
Like a woman about to go forth and sin.
29
00:04:40,575 --> 00:04:42,996
Oh, good, exactly the
look I was hoping for.
30
00:04:45,016 --> 00:04:47,116
- Good night.
- Don't wait up.
31
00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:51,917
Mrs. Flax is dating her boss.
32
00:05:09,218 --> 00:05:11,698
That means we'll be moving soon.
33
00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:15,248
Wait. Wait a minute. Wait.
34
00:05:19,158 --> 00:05:23,118
Did you just tell me that not
only am I not going on this trip,
35
00:05:23,263 --> 00:05:25,493
but that you're taking another woman?
36
00:05:25,999 --> 00:05:28,433
Honey, she's not just "another woman."
37
00:05:28,569 --> 00:05:30,094
She's my wife.
38
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:33,007
We've moved 18 times.
39
00:05:34,275 --> 00:05:36,300
It gets easy to read the signs.
40
00:05:55,584 --> 00:05:58,704
I feel I've wasted half my life in cars.
41
00:05:58,764 --> 00:06:00,404
I try to be charitable:
42
00:06:00,464 --> 00:06:03,025
taking care of Kate and not killing mother,
43
00:06:03,505 --> 00:06:04,525
But, I ask you,
44
00:06:04,625 --> 00:06:06,023
who ever heard the word of god...
45
00:06:06,053 --> 00:06:08,704
going 70 miles an hour on the interstate?
46
00:06:18,691 --> 00:06:20,935
President Kennedy arrived at
Hyannis Port this afternoon,
47
00:06:20,965 --> 00:06:22,916
leaving the rigors of Washington behind.
48
00:06:22,946 --> 00:06:24,826
On hand to greet him as the
Presidential helicopter
49
00:06:24,856 --> 00:06:26,827
touched down were his daughter...
50
00:06:31,805 --> 00:06:34,468
I don't think he wanted
those gifts they gave him.
51
00:06:34,609 --> 00:06:36,873
Frankenstein and birds?
52
00:06:38,413 --> 00:06:39,708
No, sweetheart.
53
00:06:39,768 --> 00:06:41,768
The three wise men brought
the baby Jesus...
54
00:06:41,798 --> 00:06:43,229
Frankincense and Myrrh.
55
00:06:43,469 --> 00:06:44,589
Oh.
56
00:06:46,289 --> 00:06:47,765
It's not that I don't know
about these things. Charlotte
57
00:06:47,795 --> 00:06:49,486
Just I choose to believe something else.
58
00:06:49,660 --> 00:06:51,423
I got an idea. How about some fudge?
59
00:06:51,830 --> 00:06:52,830
Yeah.
60
00:06:52,930 --> 00:06:54,630
Charlotte, you want to go make some fudge?
61
00:06:54,765 --> 00:06:56,563
I can't do anything...
62
00:06:56,701 --> 00:06:59,363
until I have everything the way it was.
63
00:07:00,138 --> 00:07:01,710
Charlotte, the whole point of moving...
64
00:07:01,740 --> 00:07:03,712
is so that everything can be different.
65
00:07:03,952 --> 00:07:06,232
I don't like waking up and
not knowing where I am.
66
00:07:06,732 --> 00:07:08,926
Well, then I'll make you a little
sign for over your bed that says:
67
00:07:08,956 --> 00:07:09,871
"Good morning, Charlotte."
68
00:07:09,901 --> 00:07:10,950
"You are now in East Port."
69
00:07:10,980 --> 00:07:12,192
"Have a lovely day."
70
00:07:12,785 --> 00:07:13,872
Oklahoma was great.
71
00:07:14,012 --> 00:07:15,112
I liked living there.
72
00:07:15,232 --> 00:07:17,712
I know. And you'll love living
here when you get used to it.
73
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:19,843
Yeah, and when you get
used to it, we'll move...
74
00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:21,168
and everything will change again.
75
00:07:21,198 --> 00:07:23,413
Life is change, Charlotte. Death is...
76
00:07:23,593 --> 00:07:25,593
dwelling on the past...
77
00:07:25,713 --> 00:07:28,094
or staying in one place too long.
78
00:07:30,705 --> 00:07:33,714
Charlotte, remind me to get
you a decent pair of shoes.
79
00:07:33,774 --> 00:07:35,894
- I don't want any.
- Don't be ridiculous, Charlotte.
80
00:07:35,944 --> 00:07:37,878
Every woman wants new shoes.
81
00:07:38,013 --> 00:07:39,421
But those are from him.
82
00:07:39,881 --> 00:07:41,595
"Him"? Oh, him.
83
00:07:42,217 --> 00:07:44,218
Charlotte says he'll visit one day.
84
00:07:44,254 --> 00:07:45,876
How will he know we're here?
85
00:07:46,416 --> 00:07:47,116
Charlotte, you know what?
86
00:07:47,146 --> 00:07:49,035
The only thing you can rely
on about your father...
87
00:07:49,065 --> 00:07:51,417
is that he can't be relied on.
88
00:07:52,663 --> 00:07:54,631
Right there. Hold on, hold on.
89
00:07:54,765 --> 00:07:57,461
I only have one memory of my father.
90
00:07:57,597 --> 00:08:00,478
At least, I think it was my father.
91
00:08:11,549 --> 00:08:14,339
Honey, it's an Eclipse. Put these on.
92
00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:30,041
One day he'll come back.
93
00:08:30,138 --> 00:08:32,201
I just hope he can find us.
94
00:08:33,361 --> 00:08:37,722
Dear God, please don't let
us be leaving right away.
95
00:08:37,842 --> 00:08:40,022
Please let me stop lying all the time.
96
00:08:40,602 --> 00:08:42,962
Please don't let me fall
crazy in love so much...
97
00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:45,483
and please let someone
fall crazy in love back.
98
00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:48,023
And please send me a sign.
99
00:08:48,958 --> 00:08:49,958
Amen.
100
00:09:02,245 --> 00:09:03,605
- Hello there.
- Hello.
101
00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:14,485
- Hey!
- Come on.
102
00:09:14,725 --> 00:09:16,886
"Chief maintenance man for
apartment house or hotel."
103
00:09:18,246 --> 00:09:19,246
Let's move it, huh?
104
00:09:19,276 --> 00:09:22,432
"Experienced mechanic."
"Sheet metal worker."
105
00:09:24,487 --> 00:09:25,857
Somehow... Charlotte,
106
00:09:25,887 --> 00:09:27,843
you drive like old people make love.
107
00:09:27,967 --> 00:09:30,857
Mom, I'm only 15. I get nervous.
108
00:09:30,887 --> 00:09:31,887
Move it over!
109
00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:33,847
Driving happens to be one of the two...
110
00:09:33,877 --> 00:09:36,108
most important skills a woman can have.
111
00:09:36,198 --> 00:09:38,123
You should be tickled pink
that I taught you early.
112
00:09:38,153 --> 00:09:39,019
Let's go!
113
00:09:39,049 --> 00:09:40,769
Wait a minute. All right, this sounds good.
114
00:09:40,849 --> 00:09:42,448
"Bright, personable young secretary..."
115
00:09:42,478 --> 00:09:46,189
"with cheerful disposition
required by small law firm."
116
00:09:47,509 --> 00:09:48,790
Why are you signaling?
117
00:09:48,890 --> 00:09:50,620
The turn is two miles down the road.
118
00:09:51,210 --> 00:09:52,250
All right, just pull over.
119
00:09:52,750 --> 00:09:53,750
Step on it!
120
00:09:54,210 --> 00:09:56,211
- Blow it out your ear!
- Kate...
121
00:10:19,113 --> 00:10:20,733
Hi.
122
00:10:21,294 --> 00:10:24,457
I just wondered if you
got moved in all right.
123
00:10:24,597 --> 00:10:26,360
Yeah, we got moved in fine.
124
00:10:28,202 --> 00:10:31,000
My name's Joe Peretti. I work up the hill.
125
00:10:31,772 --> 00:10:36,176
So if you need anything done, Ma'am...
126
00:10:36,311 --> 00:10:37,801
"Ma'am"?
127
00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:43,042
Well, what exactly is up the hill, Mr.
Peretti?
128
00:10:43,256 --> 00:10:44,756
The convent.
129
00:10:45,421 --> 00:10:47,412
Protectors of the blessed souls.
130
00:10:47,896 --> 00:10:49,356
This is a sign. Thank you, God.
131
00:10:49,456 --> 00:10:51,037
This is a real sign.
132
00:10:51,257 --> 00:10:53,617
Our nearest neighbors are nuns?
133
00:10:54,932 --> 00:10:57,628
I suppose you think this
is divine providence?
134
00:10:58,903 --> 00:11:01,358
You know what? There is
one small thing, Joe.
135
00:11:01,498 --> 00:11:04,158
- Here. That porch swing up there?
- Yeah?
136
00:11:04,258 --> 00:11:06,159
I just can't seem to reach it.
137
00:11:06,259 --> 00:11:09,178
Okay. I'll take a look.
138
00:11:20,259 --> 00:11:23,457
So, Joe, how old did you say you were?
139
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:29,411
Twenty-six and cute as a button.
140
00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,241
Too bad you're set on being a nun.
141
00:11:34,501 --> 00:11:35,361
You know, Charlotte,
142
00:11:35,441 --> 00:11:37,521
I think you might be old
enough for a boyfriend now.
143
00:11:38,447 --> 00:11:40,642
If I'm old enough, maybe you're too old.
144
00:11:41,762 --> 00:11:42,762
Don't be ridiculous.
145
00:11:42,812 --> 00:11:44,963
A real woman is never too old.
146
00:12:14,466 --> 00:12:18,217
Let's go! Let's go!
147
00:13:10,632 --> 00:13:11,633
Please, God,
148
00:13:11,723 --> 00:13:14,673
don't let me fall in love and
want to do disgusting things.
149
00:13:22,673 --> 00:13:25,103
Dear God, I love the way he throws.
150
00:13:40,279 --> 00:13:42,281
Come on.
151
00:13:46,489 --> 00:13:48,320
Mrs. Flax...
152
00:13:48,776 --> 00:13:50,527
I'm taking my fiancée out to lunch.
153
00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:52,477
I expect you to be here when I return.
154
00:13:52,961 --> 00:13:55,062
Hi, sweetie.
155
00:13:55,637 --> 00:13:57,878
How are those depositions coming?
156
00:13:57,928 --> 00:14:00,058
They'll be ready.
157
00:14:03,675 --> 00:14:04,678
Assholes.
158
00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:19,330
Do you like your new boss, Mom?
159
00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:20,920
No, sweetheart, I don't.
160
00:14:21,391 --> 00:14:22,181
You make out the list?
161
00:14:22,296 --> 00:14:23,556
Yeah. Kate needs a new swimsuit.
162
00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:25,380
I need notebooks, pens and underwear.
163
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,405
All right, I only have a
half an hour for lunch,
164
00:14:27,435 --> 00:14:28,670
so after we pick out the shoes,
165
00:14:28,730 --> 00:14:31,331
- Then I'll give you money and you can buy the rest.
- Okay.
166
00:14:31,431 --> 00:14:32,731
- I want red ones.
- All right.
167
00:14:32,831 --> 00:14:34,281
- Bright red ones.
- All right.
168
00:14:34,408 --> 00:14:35,966
- With a red strap.
- Yes, Katie.
169
00:14:36,544 --> 00:14:39,708
- I don't need anything.
- Charlotte, don't aggravate me.
170
00:14:40,082 --> 00:14:42,407
You're starting a new school on
Monday and those boots aren't.
171
00:14:42,437 --> 00:14:44,482
- What's wrong with them?
- Everything!
172
00:14:50,693 --> 00:14:53,322
- Because I'm the best mother in the world.
- Yes.
173
00:14:53,484 --> 00:14:54,584
I'll be right with you.
174
00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:57,234
Hail Mary, full of grace.
175
00:15:00,705 --> 00:15:02,765
- Katydid.
- Let me try them on.
176
00:15:08,681 --> 00:15:10,342
You must be Mrs. Flax.
177
00:15:10,816 --> 00:15:11,925
Joseph told us...
178
00:15:11,955 --> 00:15:14,526
that a nice Jewish family
were our new neighbors.
179
00:15:15,086 --> 00:15:16,927
Welcome to East Port.
180
00:15:17,858 --> 00:15:20,156
Oh, God, please let Mrs.
Flax control herself.
181
00:15:20,727 --> 00:15:23,768
- Look, Mom.
- You're still a perfect seven, Reverend Mother.
182
00:15:23,928 --> 00:15:26,768
You know, most women's feet get bigger.
183
00:15:26,888 --> 00:15:28,087
Only if they marry.
184
00:15:29,067 --> 00:15:31,187
- Oh, no.
- Your feet swell.
185
00:15:31,688 --> 00:15:33,768
When you get pregnant, your feet swell.
186
00:15:33,875 --> 00:15:35,648
How could she? How could she?
187
00:15:36,338 --> 00:15:38,138
I know mine got swollen
when I was pregnant.
188
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,868
Mother, how could you say that?
189
00:15:41,898 --> 00:15:43,869
She's a holy vessel.
190
00:15:45,839 --> 00:15:47,650
What a lovely red shoe.
191
00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:48,930
Thank you.
192
00:15:50,593 --> 00:15:52,493
So where are you ladies from?
193
00:15:52,629 --> 00:15:55,155
I used to live in South Dakota myself.
194
00:15:56,531 --> 00:15:57,531
Can you imagine...
195
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,841
trying to keep Kosher in South Dakota?
196
00:16:01,071 --> 00:16:03,192
I can't imagine trying
to keep Kosher anywhere.
197
00:16:03,492 --> 00:16:04,532
Yeah.
198
00:16:07,279 --> 00:16:09,372
Will that be all, Reverend Mother?
199
00:16:09,942 --> 00:16:11,143
Only one new addition?
200
00:16:11,984 --> 00:16:14,993
Every year, fewer and fewer of us now.
201
00:16:16,073 --> 00:16:18,413
Nice to meet you, Mrs. Flax.
202
00:16:18,525 --> 00:16:21,255
I hope you enjoy living in East Port.
203
00:16:22,444 --> 00:16:23,494
Yes, dear?
204
00:16:23,994 --> 00:16:26,124
I desperately wanted to ask
what color her bra was...
205
00:16:26,224 --> 00:16:28,170
and if she had pure thoughts
every second of the day,
206
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,245
but...
207
00:16:31,171 --> 00:16:33,196
Well, good-bye.
208
00:16:56,464 --> 00:16:58,566
Oh!
209
00:16:59,437 --> 00:17:01,848
She's got a pair that she likes.
What about you?
210
00:17:03,018 --> 00:17:04,598
I don't need any shoes. Thank you.
211
00:17:10,749 --> 00:17:11,779
Nice boots.
212
00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:20,100
Maybe I'll see you at the
Parent & Teachers' Night.
213
00:17:20,250 --> 00:17:21,286
Maybe you will.
214
00:17:22,701 --> 00:17:26,901
Oh... Good. Yeah. I'd like that.
215
00:17:36,081 --> 00:17:37,082
Yeah.
216
00:17:38,902 --> 00:17:40,002
Come on, Miss Katydid,
217
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,782
we're gonna be late for registration.
218
00:17:47,083 --> 00:17:49,783
- Bye, Sergeant.
- Bye, Fish Head.
219
00:17:57,234 --> 00:18:00,295
Well, look who's driving the school bus.
220
00:18:06,475 --> 00:18:08,966
Why, Miss Charlotte, I do
believe you're blushing.
221
00:18:31,549 --> 00:18:34,638
Come on. Don't make such a deal about it.
222
00:18:34,885 --> 00:18:36,788
Just put it in your mouth and smoke it.
223
00:18:36,944 --> 00:18:39,140
- I can't. Mary, I'll throw up all over.
- So...
224
00:18:40,609 --> 00:18:43,287
How was your date with Scott Jones, Mary?
225
00:18:43,409 --> 00:18:44,509
He's an animal.
226
00:18:45,409 --> 00:18:46,789
Does that mean you had a good time?
227
00:18:46,819 --> 00:18:49,520
We had oral sex by the
old railroad trestle.
228
00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,650
I love it when they groan,
229
00:18:52,030 --> 00:18:53,170
don't you?
230
00:18:53,296 --> 00:18:55,492
Mary, you're gonna get
into a heap of trouble.
231
00:18:55,611 --> 00:18:57,951
I know. I can't wait.
232
00:18:59,671 --> 00:19:00,791
Girls.
233
00:19:02,491 --> 00:19:04,212
The bell rang five minutes ago.
234
00:19:04,312 --> 00:19:05,652
Sorry, Mrs. Crain.
235
00:19:06,212 --> 00:19:07,912
If she tells my mother, I'm dead.
236
00:19:32,407 --> 00:19:34,808
- Noree?
- Here.
237
00:19:39,115 --> 00:19:40,815
Class, we have a new student today.
238
00:19:40,915 --> 00:19:42,116
Charlotte Flax.
239
00:19:42,676 --> 00:19:45,084
I'm sure you'll all do your
best to make her feel welcome.
240
00:19:45,556 --> 00:19:47,096
Charlotte.
241
00:19:47,216 --> 00:19:50,017
Charlotte, right down there.
242
00:19:50,167 --> 00:19:52,557
Charlotte Flax, Right?
243
00:19:52,677 --> 00:19:54,557
F-I-a-x. Here.
244
00:19:57,097 --> 00:19:58,418
- Uh, Kent?
- Here.
245
00:20:03,418 --> 00:20:04,678
Bye.
246
00:20:10,559 --> 00:20:13,100
Talk to me, Joe. Please talk to me.
247
00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:16,454
So how do you like the house?
248
00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:19,800
Sorry?
249
00:20:24,801 --> 00:20:25,861
How do you like the house?
250
00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:28,327
I hate the house.
251
00:20:29,122 --> 00:20:30,404
I was born there.
252
00:20:30,622 --> 00:20:31,922
I love that house.
253
00:20:32,022 --> 00:20:33,042
You were?
254
00:20:33,502 --> 00:20:34,682
Under the kitchen table.
255
00:20:35,877 --> 00:20:39,103
God strike me down. That's
almost as good as a manger.
256
00:20:39,563 --> 00:20:41,562
Give me strength not
to sit on his lap.
257
00:20:42,922 --> 00:20:44,923
Um...
258
00:20:45,323 --> 00:20:48,503
So was that you who carved
"Red Sox" on the door?
259
00:20:50,103 --> 00:20:51,503
That used to be my room.
260
00:20:52,324 --> 00:20:53,564
I'm in his room.
261
00:20:54,324 --> 00:20:55,564
When my mother died,
262
00:20:55,624 --> 00:20:57,584
I sat on my bed for two
days holding her sweater.
263
00:20:57,804 --> 00:21:00,125
I didn't care about anything anymore,
264
00:21:00,225 --> 00:21:01,899
not even the Red Sox.
265
00:21:02,325 --> 00:21:04,234
I'm gonna burn in hell for sure.
266
00:21:04,408 --> 00:21:06,511
He's talking about his poor dead mother,
267
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:09,126
and I can't stop wishing his
hands were unbuttoning my dress.
268
00:21:14,686 --> 00:21:15,687
Okay.
269
00:21:17,127 --> 00:21:20,326
That will be Carrie. She sells cosmetics.
270
00:21:20,460 --> 00:21:23,127
Oh... She's gonna love my Mom.
271
00:21:29,470 --> 00:21:30,470
Okay.
272
00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:35,766
I was gonna ask, I was wondering,
273
00:21:35,911 --> 00:21:38,379
what do people do here on the weekends?
274
00:21:41,350 --> 00:21:43,510
Sunday's my day off.
275
00:21:43,685 --> 00:21:44,685
Sometimes I go fishing.
276
00:21:46,288 --> 00:21:50,055
Really? I love to fish.
277
00:21:50,193 --> 00:21:53,880
Well, sometimes I just sit
by the water and think.
278
00:21:56,733 --> 00:21:58,132
That sounds great too.
279
00:22:00,191 --> 00:22:02,812
Well, Maybe you and your sister...
280
00:22:02,932 --> 00:22:04,132
Oh, well, um...
281
00:22:04,572 --> 00:22:06,571
Kate's actually scared of the water,
282
00:22:06,601 --> 00:22:07,163
Oh.
283
00:22:07,193 --> 00:22:09,712
But, um... I'd love to.
284
00:22:14,233 --> 00:22:16,333
Well, I drive right by here
on my way to the cliffs,
285
00:22:16,513 --> 00:22:18,234
so...
286
00:22:19,334 --> 00:22:20,334
What time?
287
00:22:20,734 --> 00:22:21,734
Seven.
288
00:22:22,334 --> 00:22:23,514
Okay, that sounds great.
289
00:22:24,764 --> 00:22:26,995
Okay, I'll wait for you.
290
00:22:27,134 --> 00:22:28,601
- Okay, bye.
- Okay, bye.
291
00:22:38,576 --> 00:22:40,736
Know your colors and know your fabrics.
292
00:22:40,836 --> 00:22:42,517
That's what I tell all my little girls.
293
00:22:43,517 --> 00:22:45,986
Honey, I would kill to have your hair.
294
00:22:46,116 --> 00:22:48,166
Swimming's fine for your figure,
295
00:22:48,196 --> 00:22:49,987
but it can damage your hair.
296
00:22:50,037 --> 00:22:52,037
Got anything for Sharks and Jellyfish?
297
00:22:52,161 --> 00:22:54,152
- What, dear?
- She means body grease.
298
00:22:54,297 --> 00:22:56,457
Miss Kate's going to swim the
English Channel one day.
299
00:22:58,068 --> 00:23:01,265
Oh. Well, I'm not sure I have
exactly what you're looking for,
300
00:23:02,338 --> 00:23:03,738
but try this.
301
00:23:05,239 --> 00:23:06,338
It was meant for crow's feet,
302
00:23:06,368 --> 00:23:08,139
but never really caught on.
303
00:23:09,514 --> 00:23:12,039
You are finished.
304
00:23:13,452 --> 00:23:15,044
Now, why don't you try the other side?
305
00:23:18,090 --> 00:23:21,458
Tell me about that Caretaker,
the one at the convent.
306
00:23:21,741 --> 00:23:24,841
You mean Joey? Is he
handsome or is he handsome?
307
00:23:25,341 --> 00:23:27,641
In high school, he was
quite the golden boy.
308
00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:29,942
No one could touch him on a football field.
309
00:23:30,042 --> 00:23:33,642
Then in the middle of his
senior year, he lost it.
310
00:23:33,742 --> 00:23:35,542
He couldn't run to save his life.
311
00:23:36,243 --> 00:23:40,643
His girlfriend had just
left town kind of sudden.
312
00:23:41,650 --> 00:23:43,345
My theory?
313
00:23:43,485 --> 00:23:46,580
I believe there's a little Joey
junior walking around somewhere.
314
00:23:47,344 --> 00:23:48,842
If I wasn't married to a real son of a gun,
315
00:23:48,872 --> 00:23:50,643
I'd go after him myself.
316
00:23:51,527 --> 00:23:53,120
Joey, Joey, Joey.
317
00:23:53,263 --> 00:23:56,130
Entering the convent for the sin
of getting a girl pregnant.
318
00:23:56,266 --> 00:23:59,429
A penitent man. Makes
me love you even more.
319
00:23:59,585 --> 00:24:04,337
Oh, honey... You have very special eyes.
320
00:24:05,076 --> 00:24:07,357
Only you and Liz Taylor can
get away with those eyebrows.
321
00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,446
Come.
322
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,345
Let's put some color on you.
323
00:24:13,346 --> 00:24:15,126
This one's planning on being a nun.
324
00:24:24,648 --> 00:24:25,848
Difficult age.
325
00:24:25,948 --> 00:24:28,148
All Charlotte's ages are difficult.
326
00:24:32,949 --> 00:24:34,804
You never came to Parent
& Teacher Night before.
327
00:24:34,834 --> 00:24:36,629
I don't see what's so
special about this one.
328
00:24:36,749 --> 00:24:38,449
Charlotte, you read the invitation.
329
00:24:38,650 --> 00:24:40,850
"Community begins in the classroom."
330
00:24:40,950 --> 00:24:42,120
I am your mother.
331
00:24:42,150 --> 00:24:45,277
It is my job to watch over your education.
332
00:24:46,288 --> 00:24:48,018
There's so little of it left.
333
00:24:48,251 --> 00:24:49,521
What took you so long?
334
00:24:49,551 --> 00:24:51,111
Ooh, we're gonna play my favorite game.
335
00:24:51,150 --> 00:24:53,150
Who's the worst mother in the world?
336
00:24:53,710 --> 00:24:55,710
Don't tell me. Let me guess.
Who could it be?
337
00:24:55,740 --> 00:24:57,151
Could it be me?
338
00:25:01,351 --> 00:25:03,552
All right, you know what?
I'll make you a deal.
339
00:25:03,652 --> 00:25:06,837
You stop being a little bitch
for let's say an hour or two,
340
00:25:06,952 --> 00:25:09,592
and I won't knock the religion
of your choice for a week.
341
00:25:10,453 --> 00:25:11,453
Deal.
342
00:25:14,253 --> 00:25:15,880
- Who's that?
- That's Mr. Crain.
343
00:25:16,021 --> 00:25:17,834
He's my history teacher,
and he's very nice.
344
00:25:18,124 --> 00:25:21,854
- He is an asshole.
- You haven't spoken to him yet.
345
00:25:22,134 --> 00:25:24,454
Charlotte, I don't need to speak to him.
346
00:25:24,854 --> 00:25:26,595
He's driving an Edsel, for Chrissake.
347
00:25:28,355 --> 00:25:29,355
Okay.
348
00:25:35,156 --> 00:25:36,355
We don't have a prayer against...
349
00:25:36,385 --> 00:25:38,856
Stockton's little league
if you don't release him...
350
00:25:38,956 --> 00:25:41,878
Some agendas here and there's
some refreshments in, um...
351
00:25:45,054 --> 00:25:46,487
Uh... Mrs. Flax, hi.
352
00:25:46,622 --> 00:25:48,357
I'm glad you came tonight.
353
00:25:48,457 --> 00:25:50,958
You have two weeks. I'm asking for one day.
354
00:25:51,058 --> 00:25:52,333
- I'll think about it.
- Thanks, Coach.
355
00:25:52,363 --> 00:25:53,667
- Hi, Mr. Landsky.
- Hi.
356
00:25:53,697 --> 00:25:54,756
How are you? Is your mom here?
357
00:25:54,786 --> 00:25:56,592
Yeah. Right over there.
358
00:25:58,008 --> 00:25:59,207
I've been meaning to get in touch...
359
00:25:59,237 --> 00:26:00,208
Hi.
360
00:26:03,558 --> 00:26:04,558
How are you?
361
00:26:04,719 --> 00:26:06,219
Good. Even better now.
362
00:26:06,859 --> 00:26:08,329
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
363
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:09,459
Any of these yours?
364
00:26:09,719 --> 00:26:12,139
Oh, no, mine are grown and long gone.
365
00:26:12,818 --> 00:26:15,286
- Lou, how you doin'?
- Hi. Fine.
366
00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:18,356
And where's Mrs. Landsky tonight?
367
00:26:19,260 --> 00:26:20,721
She's long gone too.
368
00:26:20,961 --> 00:26:22,889
Oh, so you're a widower man?
369
00:26:23,661 --> 00:26:25,761
Oh, no. She's just gone.
370
00:26:25,930 --> 00:26:27,141
Oh.
371
00:26:27,701 --> 00:26:28,842
Would you like some punch?
372
00:26:29,070 --> 00:26:30,662
- Sure.
- This way.
373
00:26:31,222 --> 00:26:33,722
She just up and left one day...
374
00:26:33,841 --> 00:26:35,706
right in the middle of vacuuming.
375
00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:37,539
She didn't even switch the damn thing off.
376
00:26:48,157 --> 00:26:49,784
Is there a Mr. Flax?
377
00:26:49,926 --> 00:26:53,165
No. He, too, made a rather
sudden and unexpected departure.
378
00:26:53,365 --> 00:26:54,825
Not in the middle of vacuuming?
379
00:26:54,865 --> 00:26:56,763
No, I was in the middle
of labor with Charlotte.
380
00:26:56,793 --> 00:26:59,599
- Yeah?
- Yeah, and to add insult to injury,
381
00:27:00,265 --> 00:27:02,465
the son of a bitch stole
my car to leave in.
382
00:27:02,565 --> 00:27:03,725
- Yeah?
- Yeah,
383
00:27:03,845 --> 00:27:04,725
it was a great car:
384
00:27:04,755 --> 00:27:07,216
Red Buick convertible,
white sidewall tires.
385
00:27:07,266 --> 00:27:09,146
When I think about it,
it still pisses me off.
386
00:27:09,566 --> 00:27:11,846
It's kind of obvious it
really means a lot to you.
387
00:27:12,146 --> 00:27:14,141
I remember the first time I got
behind the wheel of that car.
388
00:27:14,171 --> 00:27:16,467
I thought, "Rachel, this is heaven."
389
00:27:16,567 --> 00:27:17,666
Cars mean freedom.
390
00:27:17,696 --> 00:27:18,966
If you hate a place,
391
00:27:18,996 --> 00:27:21,967
you can get in your car, Poof, you're gone.
392
00:27:23,564 --> 00:27:25,623
So your first love was a Buick?
393
00:27:25,799 --> 00:27:27,790
Yeah, before I met my husband.
394
00:27:27,968 --> 00:27:30,228
Big mistake. One of many.
395
00:27:30,969 --> 00:27:33,469
Are we talking cars or men?
396
00:27:33,569 --> 00:27:36,169
I don't know. I've been taken
for a ride by both of them.
397
00:27:42,184 --> 00:27:44,345
- Mrs. Flax.
- Yes, Mr. Landsky.
398
00:27:44,470 --> 00:27:46,671
I, uh...
399
00:27:46,771 --> 00:27:48,941
I try not to get involved with women...
400
00:27:48,971 --> 00:27:50,882
when the World Series is about to start,
401
00:27:50,971 --> 00:27:52,722
but,
402
00:27:52,851 --> 00:27:55,172
for you, I'd make an exception.
403
00:27:56,167 --> 00:27:58,611
- Should I take that as a compliment?
- Oh, yes.
404
00:27:58,971 --> 00:28:02,732
I would really like to know
you a whole lot better.
405
00:28:03,152 --> 00:28:04,232
So call me Lou.
406
00:28:05,843 --> 00:28:07,743
So, Lou, call me.
407
00:28:10,733 --> 00:28:12,853
How about Sunday? I'm free all day.
408
00:28:13,373 --> 00:28:14,473
How about breakfast?
409
00:28:16,373 --> 00:28:17,373
Great.
410
00:28:18,391 --> 00:28:20,052
I'll bring bagels.
411
00:28:20,674 --> 00:28:22,674
- I'll be there.
- So will I.
412
00:28:25,375 --> 00:28:27,375
You see that woman there?
413
00:28:27,675 --> 00:28:29,375
- Yes.
- That's my Mom.
414
00:28:30,155 --> 00:28:32,735
When I grow up, I want
to be just like yours.
415
00:28:37,096 --> 00:28:39,736
Mary... You already are.
416
00:28:47,097 --> 00:28:48,954
I'll make real sandwiches;
417
00:28:49,054 --> 00:28:51,078
Big ones a man can sink his teeth into...
418
00:28:51,128 --> 00:28:53,178
and use both hands to hold.
419
00:28:55,878 --> 00:28:56,879
He's late.
420
00:28:56,979 --> 00:28:59,349
Oh, god, please don't let him forget.
421
00:28:59,379 --> 00:29:00,578
Be patient, Charlotte.
422
00:29:00,678 --> 00:29:02,128
Patient as Saint Bridget,
423
00:29:02,158 --> 00:29:04,399
lady-in-waiting to Queen Blanche of Namur.
424
00:29:04,542 --> 00:29:05,879
It's after 7:00, Charlotte.
425
00:29:05,979 --> 00:29:07,239
He's late.
426
00:29:08,379 --> 00:29:10,579
I will not start the day with an argument.
427
00:29:10,629 --> 00:29:13,720
I will tally up my evil thoughts
for the week and ignore her.
428
00:29:13,980 --> 00:29:16,780
When a man's late, it's
time to clear the decks.
429
00:29:39,648 --> 00:29:41,809
- No!
- What?
430
00:29:47,384 --> 00:29:49,384
Forget it. Never mind.
431
00:29:59,886 --> 00:30:01,886
Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
432
00:30:05,185 --> 00:30:07,186
Or don't do anything I would.
433
00:30:26,399 --> 00:30:28,833
Rachel Flax.
434
00:30:43,190 --> 00:30:45,750
I want to scream out the
window like a maniac,
435
00:30:46,251 --> 00:30:48,391
"I'm running away with the Caretaker man!"
436
00:30:49,171 --> 00:30:50,250
My speedometer's broken.
437
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,031
I'm trying not to drive too fast.
438
00:30:52,591 --> 00:30:53,391
After my Mom,
439
00:30:53,491 --> 00:30:55,172
nothing seems fast.
440
00:30:56,892 --> 00:30:58,692
Now my lips are touching his.
441
00:30:59,904 --> 00:31:01,394
She seems like a nice person.
442
00:31:02,407 --> 00:31:06,672
Oh, yeah... She is... and a wonderful Mom.
443
00:31:17,394 --> 00:31:18,874
Oh, God!
444
00:31:20,626 --> 00:31:23,174
My whole life I never saw
anybody treat a bagel this way.
445
00:31:23,494 --> 00:31:24,494
Where were you raised?
446
00:31:24,694 --> 00:31:25,735
Well, believe it or not,
447
00:31:25,795 --> 00:31:28,175
my parents owned a Kosher bakery.
448
00:31:28,695 --> 00:31:30,195
Yeah, they made me crazy, of course.
449
00:31:30,895 --> 00:31:32,495
And the night I ran away from home,
450
00:31:32,595 --> 00:31:34,246
I stood in the kitchen,
451
00:31:34,346 --> 00:31:37,196
Cigarette in one hand,
ham sandwich in another.
452
00:31:37,396 --> 00:31:38,896
Why were you running away?
453
00:31:39,196 --> 00:31:41,167
I had my High School Diploma,
454
00:31:41,197 --> 00:31:42,877
my first paycheck, why would I stay?
455
00:31:43,297 --> 00:31:44,267
Hi. Bye.
456
00:31:44,297 --> 00:31:44,997
Wait a minute.
457
00:31:45,027 --> 00:31:46,037
Katie...
458
00:31:46,597 --> 00:31:47,697
Bye, Mom.
459
00:31:48,177 --> 00:31:49,178
Bye, honey.
460
00:31:49,258 --> 00:31:50,384
Bye. Mr. Landsky.
461
00:31:50,498 --> 00:31:51,498
Bye.
462
00:31:56,399 --> 00:31:57,759
Where did you meet your husband?
463
00:31:57,859 --> 00:32:00,879
In a writing class. He liked my poems.
464
00:32:03,399 --> 00:32:05,740
So we moved into a one-room apartment.
465
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:07,998
It was a dump, but if
you stood on a chair...
466
00:32:08,028 --> 00:32:09,759
you could see Lake Michigan.
467
00:32:10,499 --> 00:32:12,500
Must have been tough times when he left,
468
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:13,699
raising the kid on your own.
469
00:32:13,729 --> 00:32:15,000
I coped.
470
00:32:20,501 --> 00:32:21,501
Um...
471
00:32:21,761 --> 00:32:23,041
Who was Kate's father?
472
00:32:23,930 --> 00:32:25,426
- Are you always this nosy?
- This nosy?
473
00:32:25,456 --> 00:32:27,902
No. Small-town boy.
474
00:32:28,002 --> 00:32:30,002
I like to know other people's business.
475
00:32:30,102 --> 00:32:31,102
Do you mind?
476
00:32:31,182 --> 00:32:32,882
No. When I mind, you'll know I mind.
477
00:32:33,102 --> 00:32:34,402
It's kind of obvious.
478
00:32:34,902 --> 00:32:36,403
So who was he?
479
00:32:37,043 --> 00:32:39,403
Well, actually, I never caught his name.
480
00:32:39,583 --> 00:32:41,377
He came to Saint Louis for a Swim Meet.
481
00:32:41,516 --> 00:32:43,504
And if he won, he was
headed for the Olympics.
482
00:32:43,764 --> 00:32:45,044
You were on the same team?
483
00:32:45,504 --> 00:32:47,404
No, I was the maid in his hotel.
484
00:32:48,704 --> 00:32:49,904
And one night,
485
00:32:50,004 --> 00:32:52,505
I delivered more than his towels.
486
00:32:57,605 --> 00:32:59,306
You're a hell of a woman, Rachel.
487
00:32:59,406 --> 00:33:00,406
I know.
488
00:33:01,606 --> 00:33:03,606
Gosh, it's been a memorable breakfast.
489
00:33:04,206 --> 00:33:05,406
I'm glad you liked it.
490
00:33:05,706 --> 00:33:08,207
I didn't say I liked it. I'm
never going to forget it.
491
00:33:10,207 --> 00:33:13,586
- Oh, I'm sorry. No offense.
- No. None taken.
492
00:33:14,767 --> 00:33:15,767
Uh...
493
00:33:16,355 --> 00:33:17,355
Okay. Uh...
494
00:33:18,724 --> 00:33:19,724
You, uh...
495
00:33:21,393 --> 00:33:22,691
What you want to do?
496
00:33:22,808 --> 00:33:24,408
We got all day.
497
00:33:25,308 --> 00:33:26,768
You want to go out someplace?
498
00:33:39,370 --> 00:33:41,210
Do you want to go out someplace?
499
00:33:43,950 --> 00:33:45,510
Not really. No.
500
00:33:47,911 --> 00:33:49,271
Do you want to go out someplace?
501
00:33:49,371 --> 00:33:51,718
No, I'm fine.
502
00:33:56,132 --> 00:33:59,132
So, Joe, tell me about
the nuns in the convent.
503
00:33:59,212 --> 00:34:00,988
Do they wear underwear in the shower?
504
00:34:01,052 --> 00:34:02,893
I don't believe I said that.
505
00:34:03,053 --> 00:34:04,772
You know, I always I'm too embarrassed...
506
00:34:04,802 --> 00:34:06,653
to take a shower after gym.
507
00:34:06,733 --> 00:34:09,214
Mary O’Brien she dances around naked,
508
00:34:09,314 --> 00:34:11,954
screaming about her
boyfriend's quivering loins.
509
00:34:12,114 --> 00:34:14,591
Shut up, Charlotte. Shut up.
510
00:34:16,193 --> 00:34:17,514
The boat's down there.
511
00:34:20,559 --> 00:34:21,559
Please, god,
512
00:34:21,614 --> 00:34:22,893
let him throw me on the ground...
513
00:34:22,923 --> 00:34:24,414
and make another Joey junior.
514
00:34:30,615 --> 00:34:32,916
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine, thanks.
515
00:34:43,137 --> 00:34:45,897
I do want to be good and virtuous,
516
00:34:45,957 --> 00:34:47,817
but it isn't easy.
517
00:34:47,917 --> 00:34:49,058
Come on.
518
00:35:10,020 --> 00:35:13,421
Do you want to bait your own
hook or do you want me to do it?
519
00:35:14,021 --> 00:35:17,720
Mary, Mother of God...
He still wants to fish?
520
00:35:23,781 --> 00:35:24,781
What's funny?
521
00:35:24,901 --> 00:35:26,521
You're a sexy guy.
522
00:35:27,322 --> 00:35:29,202
You have to look surprised
when you say that?
523
00:35:29,436 --> 00:35:30,722
- I am surprised.
- Oh.
524
00:35:31,822 --> 00:35:34,822
Sometimes age has its compensations.
525
00:35:35,423 --> 00:35:37,223
I wouldn't go that far.
526
00:35:38,523 --> 00:35:40,322
It's been a while since
I've felt this good.
527
00:35:40,352 --> 00:35:41,323
Don't spoil it.
528
00:35:42,623 --> 00:35:44,624
- How long?
- Too long.
529
00:35:45,321 --> 00:35:46,841
You haven't been with
any other women?
530
00:35:46,922 --> 00:35:48,824
- No.
- You're lying.
531
00:35:49,424 --> 00:35:51,925
- I am?
- Trust me. I know about these things.
532
00:35:52,696 --> 00:35:54,925
- Okay.
- Okay, what?
533
00:35:55,325 --> 00:35:57,625
- I'm lying.
- I don't care.
534
00:35:58,325 --> 00:35:59,326
That's a shame.
535
00:35:59,926 --> 00:36:01,125
Lying's my main thing.
536
00:36:01,155 --> 00:36:02,226
I'll miss it.
537
00:36:03,426 --> 00:36:05,026
Look, in my experience...
538
00:36:05,109 --> 00:36:07,227
- Which, we've established, is considerable.
- Yes.
539
00:36:07,287 --> 00:36:09,627
- Men lie about everything.
- But women don't.
540
00:36:10,003 --> 00:36:12,243
I don't know about "women," but I don't.
541
00:36:14,208 --> 00:36:16,028
- But from me you expect it.
- Absolutely.
542
00:36:17,908 --> 00:36:20,927
When you expect the worse from people,
543
00:36:21,027 --> 00:36:23,028
they usually deliver.
544
00:36:23,078 --> 00:36:24,908
Are you always this aggressive after sex?
545
00:36:25,028 --> 00:36:26,328
You call this aggressive?
546
00:36:30,149 --> 00:36:32,909
Oh, Yeah. Hey, this is fun.
547
00:36:33,829 --> 00:36:35,229
Can we do it again next Friday?
548
00:36:35,976 --> 00:36:37,209
You don't waste time, do you?
549
00:36:37,790 --> 00:36:40,210
Life's too short. I'm sorry I
got so old before I noticed.
550
00:36:40,630 --> 00:36:43,230
- I'm never growing old.
- Hmm?
551
00:36:43,930 --> 00:36:45,931
But time catches up. What can you do?
552
00:36:46,231 --> 00:36:47,381
Keep moving.
553
00:37:02,933 --> 00:37:04,033
I had a really good time.
554
00:37:04,106 --> 00:37:06,541
Yeah, me too.
555
00:37:08,233 --> 00:37:10,334
Kiss me, Joe. Please, kiss me.
556
00:37:13,834 --> 00:37:16,034
- Well, good night.
- Good night.
557
00:37:20,075 --> 00:37:21,534
- Bye.
- Bye.
558
00:37:57,167 --> 00:37:58,339
How was your date?
559
00:37:59,670 --> 00:38:02,339
Uh... Fine. We had a good time.
560
00:38:03,007 --> 00:38:04,220
Great. So did we.
561
00:38:05,210 --> 00:38:06,920
I hate when she does that.
562
00:38:07,612 --> 00:38:09,740
She's trying to break the world record.
563
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:10,771
I can't look.
564
00:38:10,801 --> 00:38:13,041
If she's not up in ten
seconds, call an ambulance.
565
00:38:14,141 --> 00:38:15,621
So, when are you gonna see him again?
566
00:38:15,981 --> 00:38:17,221
I don't know.
567
00:38:18,241 --> 00:38:20,342
Well, If I were you,
Charlotte, I'd go easy.
568
00:38:20,922 --> 00:38:22,991
I mean I know you're
planning a celibate life,
569
00:38:23,021 --> 00:38:24,361
but with half my chromosomes,
570
00:38:24,391 --> 00:38:25,681
I think that might be tough.
571
00:38:27,802 --> 00:38:29,622
Yuck, five seconds off.
572
00:38:49,044 --> 00:38:51,405
I must stop having impure
thoughts about Joe.
573
00:38:51,845 --> 00:38:53,845
I don't take the bus to school anymore.
574
00:38:53,945 --> 00:38:55,405
That doesn't seem to help.
575
00:38:56,045 --> 00:38:57,924
Maybe if I can figure out why I love him,
576
00:38:57,954 --> 00:38:59,546
the sick feeling will go away.
577
00:38:59,837 --> 00:39:00,895
I love him.
578
00:39:01,038 --> 00:39:03,097
He has the most beautiful
skin in captivity.
579
00:39:03,240 --> 00:39:05,645
I love him because he wears
moccasins in the Winter,
580
00:39:05,675 --> 00:39:08,839
even though his feet must
feel like blocks of ice.
581
00:39:18,748 --> 00:39:22,049
- Trick or treat!
- Trick or treat!
582
00:39:22,249 --> 00:39:23,220
Okay, I'm coming!
583
00:39:23,250 --> 00:39:24,848
- Anything for Halloween?
- Yes.
584
00:39:24,878 --> 00:39:26,648
I've got wonderful prizes for you!
585
00:39:27,648 --> 00:39:28,748
Toothpaste?
586
00:39:28,948 --> 00:39:29,988
- Toothpaste!
- All right.
587
00:39:31,949 --> 00:39:34,099
All right, it's magic toothpaste.
588
00:39:34,199 --> 00:39:35,949
- Mom...
- It's magic toothpaste.
589
00:39:36,007 --> 00:39:37,650
Bye. Hey, hey, wait, wait!
590
00:39:37,750 --> 00:39:39,930
Miss Kate, in the house.
591
00:39:40,690 --> 00:39:41,630
Come on, Mom.
592
00:39:41,660 --> 00:39:43,450
Put your goldfish lips in the house.
593
00:39:43,550 --> 00:39:44,650
Bye.
594
00:39:46,051 --> 00:39:48,931
- Okay.
- Come on, let's do it.
595
00:39:49,121 --> 00:39:52,121
Let's go, girls. Come on. Be Winner.
596
00:39:52,526 --> 00:39:55,328
- They're big.
- I know, I know.
597
00:39:58,252 --> 00:40:00,813
Okay. All right, team! Yeah!
598
00:40:04,753 --> 00:40:06,253
Come on. Good.
599
00:40:06,511 --> 00:40:09,003
Let's go, girls. Keep good.
600
00:40:09,054 --> 00:40:10,814
Swimmers' meet! Quiet, please!
601
00:40:12,554 --> 00:40:13,754
Swimmers, on the block.
602
00:40:16,254 --> 00:40:17,255
Take your marks.
603
00:40:24,556 --> 00:40:25,656
A regular Esther Williams.
604
00:40:25,756 --> 00:40:27,367
- What do I have?
- Mrs. Flax?
605
00:40:27,816 --> 00:40:29,655
Mrs. Flax? Coach Parker.
606
00:40:29,755 --> 00:40:31,935
So nice to meet you. Hi, Lou.
607
00:40:32,056 --> 00:40:34,656
I don't have to tell you
how proud we are of Kate.
608
00:40:34,742 --> 00:40:36,972
You know, I think she
has Olympic potential.
609
00:40:37,111 --> 00:40:39,356
- But I guess that doesn't surprise you.
- Not at all.
610
00:40:39,556 --> 00:40:41,479
- Does she get it from you?
- Not at all.
611
00:40:41,616 --> 00:40:43,857
- Nice job, dear.
- Thanks, coach.
612
00:40:45,457 --> 00:40:46,657
Hi, Mrs. Crain.
613
00:40:47,257 --> 00:40:49,018
- Bye, coach.
- Bye, dear.
614
00:40:52,008 --> 00:40:53,008
Lou, I don't know what to say.
615
00:40:53,038 --> 00:40:54,258
They're terrible.
616
00:40:54,458 --> 00:40:57,329
Hey, I said painting was my passion.
617
00:40:57,359 --> 00:40:59,099
I didn't say I was good, you know.
618
00:40:59,359 --> 00:41:01,319
Hey, girls, you got back me up here.
619
00:41:02,099 --> 00:41:04,819
Did either of you ever once
hear me say to your mother...
620
00:41:04,849 --> 00:41:05,873
that I had talent?
621
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:06,960
- No.
- No.
622
00:41:07,010 --> 00:41:09,010
I rest my case. Okay?
623
00:41:10,648 --> 00:41:13,941
Now, will you stop being a
pain-in-the-ass critic...
624
00:41:14,011 --> 00:41:15,331
and pose for me?
625
00:41:15,361 --> 00:41:17,240
Yes, but if you make me look
like that, you're a dead man.
626
00:41:17,270 --> 00:41:19,062
- Trust me.
- Right.
627
00:41:19,262 --> 00:41:21,162
Girls, follow me.
628
00:41:21,728 --> 00:41:23,162
Already I feel inspired.
629
00:41:26,062 --> 00:41:28,703
I'll show you where you're sleeping.
Ladies?
630
00:41:37,263 --> 00:41:37,933
Okay?
631
00:41:37,963 --> 00:41:38,963
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
632
00:41:39,113 --> 00:41:40,643
Forgive me if I don't linger, girls,
633
00:41:40,748 --> 00:41:42,824
But when the muse calls,
the artist has to jump.
634
00:41:43,464 --> 00:41:44,544
- Good night.
- Good night.
635
00:41:45,564 --> 00:41:47,564
- He's nutso.
- Ha.
636
00:42:03,066 --> 00:42:05,466
I did Sophie from memory.
637
00:42:05,566 --> 00:42:07,827
I've never worked with a live one before.
638
00:42:07,944 --> 00:42:09,878
Huh?
639
00:42:10,107 --> 00:42:11,267
Now this is fun.
640
00:42:12,267 --> 00:42:13,668
Don't you think this is fun?
641
00:42:17,156 --> 00:42:19,248
Oh, Cleo, baby...
642
00:42:19,468 --> 00:42:22,495
That is not very regal.
643
00:43:11,574 --> 00:43:13,873
Sometimes I feel like you're the child...
644
00:43:13,903 --> 00:43:15,254
and I'm the grown-up.
645
00:43:17,890 --> 00:43:20,484
I can't ever imagine being inside you.
646
00:43:23,696 --> 00:43:26,175
I can't imagine being anywhere
you'd let me hang around...
647
00:43:26,205 --> 00:43:28,176
for nine straight months.
648
00:43:51,578 --> 00:43:53,356
What's wrong with this picture?
649
00:43:53,478 --> 00:43:54,929
Compliments of Mrs. Landsky.
650
00:43:55,064 --> 00:43:57,779
It seems she's frozen Lou's
meals for the next decade.
651
00:43:58,265 --> 00:43:59,265
Good morning.
652
00:43:59,309 --> 00:44:01,259
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
653
00:44:01,669 --> 00:44:02,819
What a good morning.
654
00:44:02,849 --> 00:44:05,773
- This is for you.
- Thank you.
655
00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:07,310
How did you sleep, Charlotte?
656
00:44:07,410 --> 00:44:08,260
Did you weather the storm?
657
00:44:08,340 --> 00:44:09,840
Yeah. Fine, thanks.
658
00:44:15,721 --> 00:44:18,261
This is how you normally
eat breakfast together?
659
00:44:19,582 --> 00:44:20,092
Yeah.
660
00:44:20,122 --> 00:44:21,122
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
661
00:44:21,282 --> 00:44:22,962
Oh.
662
00:44:33,983 --> 00:44:37,284
The time is Autumn, 1621.
663
00:44:37,584 --> 00:44:40,608
The place is Plymouth Plantation:
664
00:44:40,781 --> 00:44:43,584
An English colony in Massachusetts.
665
00:44:44,052 --> 00:44:48,584
This is a harvest feast; a thanksgiving.
666
00:44:49,458 --> 00:44:50,685
To share the harvest,
667
00:44:50,785 --> 00:44:54,165
the Englishmen have invited
their friends, the Indians,
668
00:44:54,263 --> 00:44:56,128
Oh, God.
669
00:44:56,265 --> 00:44:59,136
For games and contests of skill.
670
00:44:59,286 --> 00:45:00,486
Oh, dear God.
671
00:45:03,140 --> 00:45:06,440
- What is it? Marsha?
- What happened?
672
00:45:06,667 --> 00:45:09,347
- The President's been shot!
- What?
673
00:45:10,447 --> 00:45:12,447
The President's been shot!
674
00:45:13,084 --> 00:45:16,486
- I can't believe that!
- Benny, turn that off!
675
00:45:18,488 --> 00:45:20,488
Listen. Listen.
676
00:45:21,349 --> 00:45:24,589
Governor Connally was shot
in the upper left chest.
677
00:45:24,689 --> 00:45:26,349
The first unconfirmed reports say...
678
00:45:26,449 --> 00:45:28,730
The President was hit in the head.
679
00:45:28,869 --> 00:45:30,599
That's an unconfirmed report
680
00:45:30,730 --> 00:45:32,290
that the President was hit in the head.
681
00:45:32,690 --> 00:45:34,465
The President's wife, Jackie
Kennedy, was not hurt.
682
00:45:34,495 --> 00:45:38,071
She walked into the hospital at
her husband's stretcher side.
683
00:45:38,213 --> 00:45:40,291
A Dallas newsman, Mel Couch,
684
00:45:40,391 --> 00:45:42,790
said he was riding behind the
President in the parade.
685
00:45:42,890 --> 00:45:44,490
He said, after the shots were fired,
686
00:45:44,540 --> 00:45:46,326
he happened to look up at
the fifth or sixth floor...
687
00:45:46,356 --> 00:45:48,351
of the Texas book depository.
688
00:45:48,691 --> 00:45:50,691
he said he saw the rifle
being pulled back in.
689
00:45:51,391 --> 00:45:52,672
I want my father.
690
00:45:52,762 --> 00:45:53,592
Please, god,
691
00:45:53,692 --> 00:45:54,972
I want to speak to my father.
692
00:45:58,092 --> 00:46:00,092
Tell us exactly what you saw, sir.
693
00:46:00,853 --> 00:46:03,869
He was coming down the street...
694
00:46:04,008 --> 00:46:06,568
and my five-year-old boy and myself...
695
00:46:06,710 --> 00:46:08,974
were by ourselves on the grass
there on Palmer street.
696
00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:11,674
I waved and the man... the man...
697
00:46:12,450 --> 00:46:14,974
It's all right, sir. You waved at him.
698
00:46:16,295 --> 00:46:18,522
As he was waving back, the shot rang out...
699
00:46:18,658 --> 00:46:20,057
and he slumped down in his seat...
700
00:46:20,193 --> 00:46:24,927
and his wife reached up toward
him as he was slumping down...
701
00:46:25,065 --> 00:46:27,795
and the second shot went off
and it just knocked him down.
702
00:46:27,896 --> 00:46:29,346
- Two shots?
- Two shots.
703
00:46:29,436 --> 00:46:30,512
Did you see the man, who did it?
704
00:46:30,542 --> 00:46:32,677
No, sir, I did not see the man. I...
705
00:46:32,977 --> 00:46:37,444
I'm sorry I can't help you more,
706
00:46:37,612 --> 00:46:39,376
but I... I won't forget it.
707
00:46:39,498 --> 00:46:40,348
Excuse me, Jack.
708
00:46:40,448 --> 00:46:42,978
Here is a flash from the
associated press, Dateline Dallas.
709
00:46:43,078 --> 00:46:45,297
Two priests who were with
President Kennedy...
710
00:46:45,397 --> 00:46:47,858
say he is dead of bullet wounds.
711
00:46:48,457 --> 00:46:50,358
There is no further confirmation,
712
00:46:50,458 --> 00:46:54,189
but this is what we have on a flash
basis from the associated press.
713
00:46:55,298 --> 00:46:57,425
The pair of men have just administered...
714
00:46:57,567 --> 00:47:00,399
the last rites of the catholic
church to President Kennedy.
715
00:47:00,799 --> 00:47:04,000
President Kennedy has been assassinated.
716
00:47:04,100 --> 00:47:07,800
It's official now. The President is dead.
717
00:47:08,112 --> 00:47:11,014
Women here in shock; some have fainted.
718
00:47:11,149 --> 00:47:13,981
Two secret service men standing
by the emergency room,
719
00:47:14,361 --> 00:47:17,180
tears streaming down their face.
720
00:47:17,322 --> 00:47:20,862
There's only one word to
describe the picture here,
721
00:47:20,982 --> 00:47:23,402
and that's grief, and much of it.
722
00:47:24,142 --> 00:47:25,982
As of just a few moments ago,
723
00:47:26,142 --> 00:47:29,703
the President of the United States is dead.
724
00:47:33,274 --> 00:47:35,804
It feels like there isn't
a single adult left...
725
00:47:35,904 --> 00:47:37,804
on the entire planet.
726
00:47:43,419 --> 00:47:45,943
Oh, God, what were you doing?
727
00:47:46,121 --> 00:47:47,984
How could you let this happen?
728
00:47:53,863 --> 00:47:55,365
I miss my father.
729
00:47:56,332 --> 00:47:58,686
I wonder if he's watching television.
730
00:47:59,306 --> 00:48:01,006
Maybe he's in the jungles of Brazil...
731
00:48:01,106 --> 00:48:02,686
and doesn't even know what's happened.
732
00:48:41,216 --> 00:48:44,512
The old man who did this job before me...
733
00:48:45,872 --> 00:48:47,412
He had Indian ways.
734
00:48:49,811 --> 00:48:51,811
He could stand so quiet,
735
00:48:52,762 --> 00:48:55,612
his heels together, like a little dancer.
736
00:49:00,270 --> 00:49:02,113
The world's gone crazy.
737
00:49:02,170 --> 00:49:06,107
I know. I know.
738
00:49:07,213 --> 00:49:08,374
I know.
739
00:49:59,019 --> 00:50:01,039
Our Father, who art in Heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
740
00:50:01,069 --> 00:50:01,879
Thy kingdom come,
741
00:50:01,909 --> 00:50:03,644
thy will be done on earth
as it is in heaven.
742
00:50:03,674 --> 00:50:04,620
Give us this day our daily bread...
743
00:50:04,650 --> 00:50:06,200
and forgive us our trespasses,
744
00:50:06,300 --> 00:50:07,553
as we forgive those who
trespass against us.
745
00:50:07,583 --> 00:50:09,140
And lead us not into temptation,
746
00:50:09,240 --> 00:50:10,761
but deliver us from evil. Amen.
747
00:50:11,450 --> 00:50:13,384
In 1990,
748
00:50:13,518 --> 00:50:17,010
the Age of Space will be
entering its second phase,
749
00:50:17,189 --> 00:50:20,318
and our hopes in it to preserve the peace,
750
00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:23,752
to make sure that in this great new sea,
751
00:50:23,930 --> 00:50:25,454
as on earth,
752
00:50:25,631 --> 00:50:28,328
The United States is second to none.
753
00:50:35,009 --> 00:50:37,034
Everyone's crying about the President.
754
00:50:37,178 --> 00:50:39,305
I've turned into a fallen woman overnight,
755
00:50:39,404 --> 00:50:40,404
and no one can tell.
756
00:50:40,448 --> 00:50:42,474
I've been as bad as I can be.
757
00:50:42,618 --> 00:50:44,415
I should be burned at the stake.
758
00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:52,826
Bless me, Father, for I have sinned,
759
00:50:52,963 --> 00:50:54,825
and in a holy place.
760
00:50:54,964 --> 00:50:55,964
I kissed him.
761
00:50:56,665 --> 00:50:57,926
I will starve myself...
762
00:50:58,026 --> 00:51:01,026
until I purge every sinful thought
about Joe Peretti from my soul.
763
00:51:11,927 --> 00:51:14,544
the sins of the saints never go unpunished.
764
00:51:14,628 --> 00:51:16,928
Joan of Arc got burned at the stake.
765
00:51:17,028 --> 00:51:19,088
Okay, so what are you
going to do to me, Lord?
766
00:51:19,625 --> 00:51:22,129
Flagellation? Mutilation?
767
00:51:22,795 --> 00:51:25,059
I bumped into Mr. Crain on the way,
768
00:51:25,165 --> 00:51:26,429
leaving Sammy's house.
769
00:51:26,729 --> 00:51:27,969
- That old witch woman?
- Yeah.
770
00:51:28,029 --> 00:51:29,080
Charlotte, dinner.
771
00:51:29,236 --> 00:51:30,890
Well, you think about it, get back to me.
772
00:51:31,372 --> 00:51:32,710
He's wanted a baby real bad.
773
00:51:34,375 --> 00:51:36,391
I guess he's trying one
of her love potions.
774
00:51:36,711 --> 00:51:38,171
Wish I had trouble conceiving.
775
00:51:38,531 --> 00:51:41,446
I can get pregnant if I hang my
clothes next to a man's suit.
776
00:51:41,631 --> 00:51:44,115
Oh, Lord, no. Anything but that.
777
00:51:54,565 --> 00:51:57,172
No more fasting. You're driving me crazy.
778
00:51:57,432 --> 00:51:59,799
I'm pregnant. Lord, how
could you do this to me?
779
00:52:00,304 --> 00:52:02,313
- How could you be so strict?
- Are you okay?
780
00:52:03,874 --> 00:52:06,502
All right, eat and get some rest,
781
00:52:06,677 --> 00:52:08,684
and we'll just talk about this tomorrow.
782
00:52:13,534 --> 00:52:15,355
Mary didn't even kiss Joseph...
783
00:52:15,385 --> 00:52:16,635
and look what happened to her.
784
00:52:17,335 --> 00:52:19,135
Oh, Lord, what have I done?
785
00:52:32,373 --> 00:52:33,697
Can I talk to you?
786
00:52:33,727 --> 00:52:35,017
Sure.
787
00:52:41,738 --> 00:52:42,738
Well?
788
00:52:53,039 --> 00:52:54,039
Hello?
789
00:52:55,040 --> 00:52:56,320
Is anybody there?
790
00:52:57,201 --> 00:52:59,439
Just give me a second. I'm trying, Mom.
791
00:52:59,736 --> 00:53:01,899
- What?
- I want to tell you.
792
00:53:02,019 --> 00:53:02,840
What?
793
00:53:02,940 --> 00:53:05,390
I may be pregnant with the
next Jewish-Italian Messiah.
794
00:53:05,490 --> 00:53:07,020
- What?
- Nothing.
795
00:53:09,146 --> 00:53:11,186
Charlotte, what in the hell
is the matter with you?
796
00:53:11,483 --> 00:53:14,501
What is happening in your brain
when you just sit there,
797
00:53:14,641 --> 00:53:16,241
not moving, not speaking?
798
00:53:16,401 --> 00:53:17,401
What?
799
00:53:19,642 --> 00:53:21,042
What? What?
800
00:53:24,842 --> 00:53:26,902
Dad, you're the only
person who can help,
801
00:53:26,932 --> 00:53:28,343
and you're never here.
802
00:53:28,743 --> 00:53:29,843
Where are you?
803
00:53:55,446 --> 00:53:56,571
Joe doesn't know where she is.
804
00:53:56,601 --> 00:53:57,907
We better get back.
805
00:53:58,327 --> 00:53:59,697
So, she's angry, that's okay.
806
00:53:59,797 --> 00:54:01,117
Blowing off steam... that's okay.
807
00:54:01,196 --> 00:54:03,096
But taking my car... that's not okay.
808
00:54:03,146 --> 00:54:04,847
That's going way too far.
809
00:54:05,347 --> 00:54:07,847
Did she ever talk to you about
anything bothering her?
810
00:54:07,947 --> 00:54:09,027
Lou, I'm her mother.
811
00:54:09,113 --> 00:54:10,246
If something bothers her,
812
00:54:10,276 --> 00:54:12,547
I'm the last person she's gonna talk to.
813
00:54:13,548 --> 00:54:14,647
She's a teenager, for Christ's sake.
814
00:54:14,677 --> 00:54:16,448
I'm amazed she talks at all.
815
00:54:17,356 --> 00:54:19,017
Where in the hell can she be?
816
00:54:19,188 --> 00:54:22,249
♪ Onward Christian soldiers ♪
817
00:54:22,909 --> 00:54:26,428
I want to lead a violent and exciting life!
818
00:55:33,457 --> 00:55:35,457
Excuse me, sir. I was out for a spin,
819
00:55:35,557 --> 00:55:37,157
and I seem to be having engine trouble.
820
00:55:37,957 --> 00:55:40,117
- Who is it?
- It's all right. It's just a young girl.
821
00:55:41,558 --> 00:55:43,758
I'm a shepherd who has lost my flock.
822
00:55:44,658 --> 00:55:46,629
Your folks know where you are?
823
00:55:46,659 --> 00:55:48,509
Oh, yeah, they know exactly where I am.
824
00:55:48,539 --> 00:55:51,059
Especially my dad. He's that kind of guy.
825
00:55:52,959 --> 00:55:55,420
Charlotte, you're talking
like a crazy person.
826
00:55:56,900 --> 00:55:58,360
Lou, I'm glad that you're here,
827
00:55:58,460 --> 00:56:00,040
but I don't need you to stay.
828
00:56:00,420 --> 00:56:01,800
I'll always be here for you.
829
00:56:02,661 --> 00:56:04,561
Okay, I won't always be here for you.
830
00:56:04,661 --> 00:56:05,661
Just sometimes,
831
00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:08,385
if I feel like it or I happen
to be in the neighborhood.
832
00:56:08,415 --> 00:56:09,410
Is that better?
833
00:56:09,510 --> 00:56:11,350
I know she's doing this
to turn my hair white.
834
00:56:11,416 --> 00:56:13,741
She's doing this because she has a problem,
835
00:56:13,841 --> 00:56:15,840
and she's probably too
frightened to talk to you.
836
00:56:15,870 --> 00:56:17,361
Why would she be frightened?
837
00:56:17,461 --> 00:56:20,522
Rachel, you can be a little abrasive!
838
00:56:20,622 --> 00:56:23,208
Shit, even I'm scared to
talk to you sometimes.
839
00:56:23,462 --> 00:56:26,203
She's a kid! Lighten up!
Don't ride her too hard!
840
00:56:26,283 --> 00:56:28,363
I don't need a lecture
on parenting from you!
841
00:56:28,663 --> 00:56:30,663
Okay, that's it. When
she comes, I'm leaving.
842
00:56:30,763 --> 00:56:32,803
And you wonder why she
runs away from problems?
843
00:56:32,903 --> 00:56:34,164
Will you listen to yourself?
844
00:56:34,242 --> 00:56:35,524
- Are we having a fight?
- Yeah!
845
00:56:35,610 --> 00:56:37,364
- Why?
- It relieves the tension!
846
00:56:37,445 --> 00:56:38,445
Yeah?
847
00:56:38,910 --> 00:56:41,035
Well...
848
00:56:41,065 --> 00:56:43,065
The Discotheques, which are nightclubs,
849
00:56:43,165 --> 00:56:44,935
have been very well-known...
850
00:56:44,965 --> 00:56:47,465
and popular now for years in
Europe and South America.
851
00:56:47,495 --> 00:56:49,890
Paris, for example, has about 100 of them.
852
00:56:50,026 --> 00:56:51,566
You're look at the Frug,
853
00:56:51,666 --> 00:56:54,346
a combination twist,
Patty-Cake and Hitchhike.
854
00:56:54,666 --> 00:56:55,346
That's Killer Joe,
855
00:56:55,465 --> 00:56:56,947
society's favorite dancing teacher.
856
00:56:57,047 --> 00:57:01,233
Killer Joe is also available, he
told us, as a party stimulator.
857
00:57:11,549 --> 00:57:13,415
- You like pancakes?
- Yeah.
858
00:57:14,808 --> 00:57:15,928
- Here you are.
- Thank you.
859
00:57:17,968 --> 00:57:19,528
A real, live father...
860
00:57:19,628 --> 00:57:22,349
living in the same house
as his wife and kids.
861
00:57:22,862 --> 00:57:24,749
They're perfect. This is like television.
862
00:57:25,729 --> 00:57:26,729
Thanks.
863
00:57:27,669 --> 00:57:28,930
Maybe they'll adopt me.
864
00:57:31,570 --> 00:57:32,670
Do you like bacon?
865
00:57:32,770 --> 00:57:34,770
Oh, yeah.
866
00:57:35,971 --> 00:57:37,071
- How about sausage?
- Mmm.
867
00:57:40,715 --> 00:57:44,342
- Toast?
- I love toast.
868
00:57:44,372 --> 00:57:45,372
Thanks.
869
00:57:45,772 --> 00:57:47,572
- What's your name?
- Sal.
870
00:57:48,072 --> 00:57:50,422
How could you lie to them?
They're being so nice to you.
871
00:57:51,473 --> 00:57:52,573
Sal what, dear?
872
00:57:53,373 --> 00:57:54,973
Val. Sal Val.
873
00:57:56,053 --> 00:57:57,053
Uh-oh.
874
00:57:57,153 --> 00:57:59,073
My parents, they love rhymes.
875
00:57:59,173 --> 00:58:01,413
We stay up late every night
trying to think of new ones.
876
00:58:01,574 --> 00:58:04,074
Me, Mom, Dad, Sis and my big brother...
877
00:58:04,624 --> 00:58:05,724
Al.
878
00:58:19,435 --> 00:58:20,475
Hello?
879
00:58:21,075 --> 00:58:22,082
Yeah.
880
00:58:23,726 --> 00:58:26,356
She's all right. She's in New Haven.
881
00:58:27,676 --> 00:58:29,676
Could you give me that
address again, please?
882
00:58:30,877 --> 00:58:32,567
When I was little, we lived in Brazil...
883
00:58:32,667 --> 00:58:34,437
and we owned this big diamond mine.
884
00:58:34,537 --> 00:58:37,057
My father would dance with me all the time.
885
00:58:37,144 --> 00:58:39,377
We would just dance and dance and dance...
886
00:58:39,407 --> 00:58:41,312
right in the middle of the jungle.
887
00:58:41,578 --> 00:58:42,549
Me and my sister...
888
00:58:42,579 --> 00:58:45,537
she has these beautiful, long
red curls, and she likes to...
889
00:58:45,567 --> 00:58:48,379
- wear this jeweled crown thing on her head.
- Excuse me.
890
00:58:49,091 --> 00:58:52,219
We would make this pear wine.
891
00:58:52,359 --> 00:58:55,580
We would take the bottles and
hang them from branches...
892
00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:58,361
and write on them with diamond dust.
893
00:58:58,480 --> 00:58:59,480
Charlotte?
894
00:59:12,982 --> 00:59:13,581
Bye.
895
00:59:13,681 --> 00:59:15,481
- Bye, dear.
- Bye.
896
00:59:15,581 --> 00:59:16,881
Bye, Val.
897
00:59:17,382 --> 00:59:19,482
- Bye.
- Bye.
898
00:59:19,532 --> 00:59:20,582
Bye, dear.
899
01:00:12,069 --> 01:00:14,789
Do you have the slightest idea
what you've just put me through?
900
01:00:16,755 --> 01:00:18,768
I thought you were kidnapped.
901
01:00:18,854 --> 01:00:20,789
I thought you were dead.
902
01:00:20,949 --> 01:00:22,948
I thought you were laying
by the road someplace,
903
01:00:22,978 --> 01:00:24,229
chopped into a million pieces.
904
01:00:24,289 --> 01:00:24,949
Go to your room!
905
01:00:25,049 --> 01:00:25,929
I can't talk to you right now.
906
01:00:26,029 --> 01:00:28,770
If I talk to you right now, I'll kill you.
907
01:00:38,813 --> 01:00:39,891
Okay.
908
01:00:42,416 --> 01:00:43,992
I've had a little scotch.
909
01:00:44,050 --> 01:00:45,952
I'm real calm.
910
01:00:47,452 --> 01:00:49,414
So, tell me, Charlotte...
911
01:00:50,192 --> 01:00:51,193
What's going on?
912
01:00:52,295 --> 01:00:53,713
You don't get it, Mom.
913
01:00:53,743 --> 01:00:55,593
I think I'm pregnant.
914
01:00:55,665 --> 01:00:57,073
It may be the Lord's child.
915
01:00:57,373 --> 01:00:58,653
Are you trying to make me crazy?
916
01:00:58,733 --> 01:00:59,954
You wouldn't understand.
917
01:01:00,437 --> 01:01:03,274
You don't believe in religion.
You don't believe in anything.
918
01:01:03,374 --> 01:01:04,694
Why were you running?
919
01:01:05,194 --> 01:01:06,835
Running away doesn't solve anything.
920
01:01:07,995 --> 01:01:09,995
I'm a grown-up. I don't run away.
921
01:01:10,095 --> 01:01:11,195
I move on.
922
01:01:11,395 --> 01:01:12,894
Look, if something is bothering you,
923
01:01:12,924 --> 01:01:14,645
tell me what it is. Maybe I can help you.
924
01:01:14,675 --> 01:01:16,246
How bad can it be?
925
01:01:18,795 --> 01:01:22,496
Look, I'm really tired. I just
want to go to sleep, okay?
926
01:01:30,597 --> 01:01:32,077
Let me tell you something, Charlotte.
927
01:01:32,557 --> 01:01:34,957
Sometimes being the mother really stinks.
928
01:01:35,077 --> 01:01:37,173
I don't always know what I'm doing.
929
01:01:37,297 --> 01:01:40,998
It's not like you and your sister
came with a book of instructions.
930
01:01:41,174 --> 01:01:43,498
If I can help you, tell me.
931
01:01:44,898 --> 01:01:45,998
I'll give it my best shot,
932
01:01:46,028 --> 01:01:49,699
but that's all I can do.
933
01:02:04,008 --> 01:02:05,081
Where's Charlotte?
934
01:02:05,177 --> 01:02:07,401
She's in her room, somewhere in mars.
935
01:02:08,001 --> 01:02:09,902
- What did she tell you?
- Nothing.
936
01:02:11,250 --> 01:02:12,410
Maybe her school counselor...
937
01:02:12,551 --> 01:02:14,644
What? Mrs. Crain? Are you kidding me?
938
01:02:14,786 --> 01:02:16,842
That woman couldn't find
her ass with both hands.
939
01:02:17,757 --> 01:02:20,083
Has she ever done anything
this strange before?
940
01:02:20,403 --> 01:02:23,502
She did get sent home from
school one time before...
941
01:02:23,602 --> 01:02:26,030
for licking chalk off a blackboard.
942
01:02:26,165 --> 01:02:28,083
God, her tongue was yellow for a week.
943
01:02:28,603 --> 01:02:29,843
What did she do that for?
944
01:02:29,936 --> 01:02:31,782
I don't know. She read in some book...
945
01:02:31,812 --> 01:02:34,204
that some saint had a vision
after licking a wall.
946
01:02:36,504 --> 01:02:38,503
- Mm-hmm.
- The teacher sent home a note that said...
947
01:02:38,533 --> 01:02:41,405
she thought charlotte had
psychological problems.
948
01:02:41,845 --> 01:02:43,605
- What did you do?
- We moved.
949
01:02:44,105 --> 01:02:45,105
Oh.
950
01:03:00,107 --> 01:03:01,707
- Hi.
- Hi.
951
01:03:04,708 --> 01:03:07,408
I heard you ran away. You okay?
952
01:03:07,848 --> 01:03:08,848
Yeah.
953
01:03:11,088 --> 01:03:12,409
You want to talk about it?
954
01:03:14,389 --> 01:03:16,469
It's kind of complicated.
955
01:03:18,390 --> 01:03:19,390
Okay.
956
01:03:20,593 --> 01:03:21,710
I was worried.
957
01:03:29,202 --> 01:03:31,810
Joe, tell me about your girlfriend.
958
01:03:33,139 --> 01:03:34,163
My girlfriend?
959
01:03:36,477 --> 01:03:37,791
There's nothing to tell.
960
01:03:39,280 --> 01:03:40,391
Did you love her?
961
01:03:41,515 --> 01:03:43,392
Yes, I did.
962
01:03:44,312 --> 01:03:45,512
But her family moved away,
963
01:03:45,612 --> 01:03:48,122
and I never got a chance to see her again.
964
01:03:50,212 --> 01:03:52,713
People in town talk as if
something happened between us,
965
01:03:52,895 --> 01:03:55,393
but it didn't.
966
01:04:00,437 --> 01:04:02,614
Joe, do you like babies?
967
01:04:02,974 --> 01:04:04,094
"Babies"?
968
01:04:04,794 --> 01:04:07,095
Sure. I love babies.
969
01:04:07,615 --> 01:04:10,115
Someday I hope to have
a whole bunch of them.
970
01:04:22,797 --> 01:04:24,797
Joan Ark?
971
01:04:32,817 --> 01:04:34,267
Hello. I'm Dr. Reynolds.
972
01:04:34,397 --> 01:04:36,168
How do you do? You know,
Actually, I just... -
973
01:04:36,198 --> 01:04:36,977
First time here?
974
01:04:37,144 --> 01:04:39,478
- Yeah, I just had a question.
- How's school?
975
01:04:40,048 --> 01:04:42,858
It's great. I wish we had it on weekends.
976
01:04:45,619 --> 01:04:46,849
How old are you, Joan?
977
01:04:46,955 --> 01:04:48,979
What? Uh... 18.
978
01:04:50,325 --> 01:04:51,619
Is everything okay?
979
01:04:51,819 --> 01:04:53,570
Is there anything inside me?
980
01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:58,100
Just get dressed and come into my office.
981
01:04:58,666 --> 01:05:01,001
Well, uh...
982
01:05:13,251 --> 01:05:14,251
Joan,
983
01:05:14,953 --> 01:05:17,863
has your mother ever
talked to you about sex?
984
01:05:18,157 --> 01:05:19,723
Please, God, I want to die.
985
01:05:21,483 --> 01:05:23,403
Yeah, all the time.
986
01:05:24,023 --> 01:05:26,524
So you know how babies are conceived?
987
01:05:29,302 --> 01:05:30,302
Oh, yeah.
988
01:05:31,304 --> 01:05:33,804
We talk about everything.
She's a wonderful mother.
989
01:05:35,724 --> 01:05:38,124
Then why did you think you were pregnant?
990
01:05:38,224 --> 01:05:39,484
You're still a virgin.
991
01:05:42,450 --> 01:05:44,865
I want to die now, right now.
992
01:05:50,346 --> 01:05:53,486
Okay, so it's crazy to think one
kiss could get you pregnant,
993
01:05:53,626 --> 01:05:54,826
But how would I know?
994
01:05:55,226 --> 01:05:56,527
What about the Virgin Mary?
995
01:05:56,627 --> 01:05:58,107
And look at St. Perpetua.
996
01:05:58,227 --> 01:06:00,986
She got transformed into a man and
then fought with the devil...
997
01:06:01,016 --> 01:06:03,728
and walked on his head.
Weird things happen.
998
01:06:06,028 --> 01:06:06,628
Hi.
999
01:06:06,728 --> 01:06:07,868
- Hi.
- Hi.
1000
01:06:08,988 --> 01:06:09,988
How are you?
1001
01:06:10,348 --> 01:06:11,869
Can you do me a favor?
1002
01:06:12,117 --> 01:06:14,642
I need to go to Boston on
this jerk errand for my boss.
1003
01:06:14,786 --> 01:06:16,529
Could you give the girls dinner?
1004
01:06:17,109 --> 01:06:19,890
Yes! I got a great pot
roast in the freezer...
1005
01:06:19,990 --> 01:06:21,830
that Sophia left. Sound good?
1006
01:06:21,990 --> 01:06:23,130
Anything that's hot...
1007
01:06:23,180 --> 01:06:25,290
and not shaped like a
star sounds good to me.
1008
01:06:25,398 --> 01:06:27,100
Very funny. You know what?
1009
01:06:27,201 --> 01:06:29,110
Your mouth is starting to
sound like your sister's,
1010
01:06:29,140 --> 01:06:30,811
and I'm not pleased.
1011
01:06:31,171 --> 01:06:33,799
The Crain's are having
a party for New Year.
1012
01:06:33,940 --> 01:06:35,465
- Did you get an invitation?
- Mm-hmm.
1013
01:06:35,591 --> 01:06:37,873
I'm going. Will you be there?
1014
01:06:37,991 --> 01:06:39,801
Lou, it's a goddamn costume party.
1015
01:06:39,831 --> 01:06:40,731
What do you think?
1016
01:06:40,811 --> 01:06:41,811
Go.
1017
01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:43,112
As what?
1018
01:06:43,432 --> 01:06:44,632
A goldfish.
1019
01:06:45,632 --> 01:06:46,732
You're a big help.
1020
01:06:50,693 --> 01:06:51,813
Charlotte?
1021
01:06:53,229 --> 01:06:55,493
As always, it was a pleasure.
1022
01:07:45,787 --> 01:07:48,439
- Where is everybody?
- In here!
1023
01:07:48,991 --> 01:07:51,119
Where's here? What is here?
1024
01:07:53,329 --> 01:07:54,889
Hey, you guys, what's going on in here?
1025
01:07:55,640 --> 01:07:57,140
My young friend, Esther Williams,
1026
01:07:57,240 --> 01:08:00,240
wanted to know what it would feel like
to sleep at the bottom of the ocean.
1027
01:08:00,270 --> 01:08:02,001
Her wish being my command,
1028
01:08:02,101 --> 01:08:03,021
presto!
1029
01:08:03,121 --> 01:08:04,421
Wall-to-wall ocean.
1030
01:08:04,875 --> 01:08:07,001
You're certifiable. You
know that, don't you?
1031
01:08:07,441 --> 01:08:08,412
If that's true,
1032
01:08:08,442 --> 01:08:10,322
I'm hanging around with the right family.
1033
01:08:10,422 --> 01:08:11,422
- Let's show her.
- Yeah.
1034
01:08:13,742 --> 01:08:15,122
- You want to do it?
- Yeah.
1035
01:08:17,690 --> 01:08:19,883
Oh, my gosh.
1036
01:08:20,860 --> 01:08:22,443
Oh, that is so neat.
1037
01:08:22,543 --> 01:08:24,043
It's beautiful.
1038
01:08:25,465 --> 01:08:27,345
How's that? Sitting on
the bottom of the ocean.
1039
01:08:27,401 --> 01:08:29,024
- Flying fish and everything.
- Yeah.
1040
01:08:29,124 --> 01:08:31,898
- Wow.
- It's good.-
1041
01:08:34,175 --> 01:08:35,472
- Dinner!
- Dinner!
1042
01:08:35,885 --> 01:08:37,704
Let's eat. I'm so hungry.
1043
01:08:56,547 --> 01:08:58,126
You did all of that in one evening...
1044
01:08:58,156 --> 01:08:59,297
and managed to cook dinner?
1045
01:08:59,397 --> 01:09:01,247
Charlotte we have to thank for the dinner.
1046
01:09:02,547 --> 01:09:05,008
A feast to put Sophia to shame.
1047
01:09:05,048 --> 01:09:06,508
Where did you learn how to do this?
1048
01:09:06,608 --> 01:09:08,008
Home Economics.
1049
01:09:09,188 --> 01:09:11,329
If the way to a man's heart
is through his stomach,
1050
01:09:11,429 --> 01:09:13,449
I guess there's hope for
you yet, Charlotte.
1051
01:09:13,749 --> 01:09:15,549
Personally, I've never
found that to be true.
1052
01:09:15,849 --> 01:09:17,649
- Mom.
- Yeah?
1053
01:09:18,049 --> 01:09:20,830
- What do men care about?
- Astroturf.
1054
01:09:21,150 --> 01:09:22,250
According to Lou,
1055
01:09:22,350 --> 01:09:23,429
it's going to ruin baseball,
1056
01:09:23,459 --> 01:09:25,830
not to mention the whole
civilized world we know it.
1057
01:09:26,010 --> 01:09:27,406
So if you ever want to have a boyfriend,
1058
01:09:27,436 --> 01:09:29,031
I suggest you start caring about it too.
1059
01:09:30,304 --> 01:09:31,731
- Mom?
- Yeah?
1060
01:09:31,831 --> 01:09:32,871
Why don't you marry Lou...
1061
01:09:32,951 --> 01:09:34,031
so he can be our Dad?
1062
01:09:34,131 --> 01:09:35,352
We already have one, Katie.
1063
01:09:35,402 --> 01:09:36,542
Well, I've never seen him,
1064
01:09:36,642 --> 01:09:38,611
and he wouldn't make me an ocean.
1065
01:09:38,812 --> 01:09:40,011
- Can we sleep over?
- No.
1066
01:09:40,151 --> 01:09:41,214
- Please?
- No!
1067
01:09:41,311 --> 01:09:43,092
- Please?
- All right, I'll think about it.
1068
01:09:49,852 --> 01:09:51,268
Actually, you're supposed
to have two forks.
1069
01:09:51,298 --> 01:09:52,513
Why do you need two?
1070
01:09:52,613 --> 01:09:55,613
You know what we did if we used the
wrong fork or spoon when I was a kid?
1071
01:09:55,713 --> 01:09:56,313
What?
1072
01:09:56,353 --> 01:09:58,561
We had to go stick them in the ground,
1073
01:09:58,654 --> 01:10:00,670
even if the ground was frozen solid.
1074
01:10:00,804 --> 01:10:03,134
We used to call it the hardware garden.
1075
01:10:03,234 --> 01:10:04,974
- Can you believe that?
- That's nothing.
1076
01:10:05,075 --> 01:10:06,530
A kid in school had an uncle who died...
1077
01:10:06,560 --> 01:10:08,755
and got burnt up and sprinkled in a garden.
1078
01:10:08,855 --> 01:10:09,855
That's nothing.
1079
01:10:09,981 --> 01:10:12,134
St. Margaret of Antioch, she
lived as a shepherdess...
1080
01:10:12,164 --> 01:10:14,436
and she got eaten by this
dragon, and it burst.
1081
01:10:14,616 --> 01:10:16,331
When I die, I want to be
sprinkled in the ocean.
1082
01:10:16,361 --> 01:10:18,296
I don't care if a whale eats me.
1083
01:10:18,390 --> 01:10:20,256
I can live inside a whale like Jonah,
1084
01:10:20,359 --> 01:10:21,679
- with the Angel Guard.
- Girls...
1085
01:10:21,795 --> 01:10:24,257
What if you got a whale doesn't
had a living room inside...
1086
01:10:24,357 --> 01:10:26,437
and you end up in someone's
tuna fish sandwich?
1087
01:10:26,499 --> 01:10:27,659
Who are these people?
1088
01:10:27,801 --> 01:10:29,993
Once a man came to dinner and took
his shirt off at the table...
1089
01:10:30,023 --> 01:10:31,798
like we were running a nudist colony.
1090
01:10:31,898 --> 01:10:32,565
Oh, I remember him.
1091
01:10:32,706 --> 01:10:34,933
He was the one who kept yanking
quarters out of your ears.
1092
01:10:34,963 --> 01:10:36,358
Why did he take his shirt off?
1093
01:10:36,758 --> 01:10:39,559
I think he didn't want to spill
his dinner on it or something.
1094
01:10:39,839 --> 01:10:41,039
Can pass over Cranberry Sauce?
1095
01:10:41,138 --> 01:10:43,558
- Who wants some chicken?
- What's happening here?
1096
01:10:44,518 --> 01:10:48,199
What usually happens when families sit
down to a civilized meal together.
1097
01:10:48,299 --> 01:10:49,299
They talk.
1098
01:10:49,379 --> 01:10:50,634
- Cranberry Sauce?
- Yes, please.
1099
01:10:50,664 --> 01:10:51,659
Who wants some chicken?
1100
01:10:51,759 --> 01:10:53,440
- I do.
- I'd love some!
1101
01:11:02,439 --> 01:11:03,439
Wait.
1102
01:11:03,874 --> 01:11:06,104
I never said you could do this.
1103
01:11:06,243 --> 01:11:08,712
- Do what?
- Let Kate get so attached.
1104
01:11:10,014 --> 01:11:11,462
That's so terrible?
1105
01:11:11,583 --> 01:11:12,862
Yeah, this is not your family.
1106
01:11:14,285 --> 01:11:16,463
If you want to get closer
to me, dial direct,
1107
01:11:16,523 --> 01:11:18,663
But don't do it through my kids.
1108
01:11:28,468 --> 01:11:30,263
Never in my life have I
wanted to hit a woman...
1109
01:11:30,293 --> 01:11:32,845
the way I want to hit you right now.
1110
01:11:41,717 --> 01:11:43,241
When you are wrong...
1111
01:11:43,385 --> 01:11:46,251
you are so wrong, it's scary.
1112
01:11:58,501 --> 01:11:59,501
Your whole life,
1113
01:11:59,636 --> 01:12:01,066
you never did something for no reason...
1114
01:12:01,096 --> 01:12:03,027
except to make somebody happy?
1115
01:12:03,274 --> 01:12:04,668
What is it you want from me?
1116
01:12:04,775 --> 01:12:06,568
A little trust would be nice!
1117
01:12:07,211 --> 01:12:10,468
And if you care about us,
would it kill you to show it?
1118
01:12:11,116 --> 01:12:12,515
What do you mean, "us"?
1119
01:12:13,218 --> 01:12:15,948
Since when did you and
my children become "us"?
1120
01:12:16,488 --> 01:12:18,388
You're just you, Lou. Okay?
1121
01:12:18,523 --> 01:12:20,570
Me and the girls... that's us.
1122
01:12:25,464 --> 01:12:27,471
I was talking about you and me.
1123
01:12:43,652 --> 01:12:46,152
Mom, if you don't come out soon,
it's gonna be new year's day!
1124
01:12:46,454 --> 01:12:47,574
You're gonna miss the party.
1125
01:12:47,655 --> 01:12:50,032
All right. I'm almost ready.
Here's a little something.
1126
01:12:50,426 --> 01:12:52,443
- Ooh, an arm.
- This year, Mom!
1127
01:12:52,473 --> 01:12:54,443
- Come on.
- All right, all right. Here's a little more.
1128
01:12:54,473 --> 01:12:55,473
All right. Are you ready?
1129
01:12:55,503 --> 01:12:56,513
- Come on!
- Come on, Mom!
1130
01:12:56,853 --> 01:12:59,574
All right. One, two, three! Here I am!
1131
01:13:00,454 --> 01:13:02,914
- You're a Mermaid!
- No, I'm a Lumberjack.
1132
01:13:03,034 --> 01:13:04,649
- I'm a Car Salesman.
- Your beautiful tail!
1133
01:13:04,679 --> 01:13:06,802
Thank you. what you think?
1134
01:13:06,944 --> 01:13:08,874
If I would have had this costume
when you guys were little,
1135
01:13:08,904 --> 01:13:11,855
I would have done my ironing
and all your diapers in it.
1136
01:13:16,688 --> 01:13:19,122
- Oh, my God! Wait a minute!
- Is this the Mermaid bus?
1137
01:13:20,676 --> 01:13:22,647
All right, I can tell
by my Mermaid watch...
1138
01:13:22,677 --> 01:13:24,456
it's time to get into my Mermaid car...
1139
01:13:24,486 --> 01:13:25,759
and hit the Mermaid road!
1140
01:13:25,898 --> 01:13:27,477
And get the Mermaid out of here.
1141
01:13:27,577 --> 01:13:28,602
All right. You get my Mermaid coat...
1142
01:13:28,632 --> 01:13:30,478
and you get my Mermaid keys.
1143
01:13:30,838 --> 01:13:31,838
Oh, my God.
1144
01:13:33,538 --> 01:13:35,638
Oh, I was hoping I would
be fresh for the party.
1145
01:13:37,279 --> 01:13:38,379
- Bye, Mom.
- Bye, Mom.
1146
01:13:39,039 --> 01:13:41,279
- Have fun. Bye!
- Good-bye!
1147
01:13:41,379 --> 01:13:42,779
- Have a good time!
- I will!
1148
01:13:42,879 --> 01:13:43,919
Bye, Miss Mermaid!
1149
01:13:44,019 --> 01:13:46,380
Good-bye, Miss junior Mermaids! I will!
1150
01:13:59,460 --> 01:14:01,461
- Hi, Mary. How are you?
- Hi, George.
1151
01:14:05,681 --> 01:14:06,432
Thank you.
1152
01:14:06,462 --> 01:14:08,922
Where's that handsome Hunk
of a husband of yours, huh?
1153
01:14:09,614 --> 01:14:11,042
Out front, talking baseball.
1154
01:14:12,350 --> 01:14:13,702
He just bet 20 bucks...
1155
01:14:13,732 --> 01:14:15,932
they couldn't name three
players that batted over .400.
1156
01:14:17,056 --> 01:14:19,684
Hey! Buzz! I'll be right back.
1157
01:14:20,726 --> 01:14:23,363
Ty Cobb, Joe Jackson, Nap Lajoie!
1158
01:14:23,463 --> 01:14:24,684
You owe me 20 bucks!
1159
01:14:26,132 --> 01:14:28,692
The last day ever of this year.
1160
01:14:30,136 --> 01:14:31,685
You want to make some resolutions?
1161
01:14:32,606 --> 01:14:34,733
What are resolutions?
1162
01:14:35,276 --> 01:14:36,985
They're sort of like wishes.
1163
01:14:37,678 --> 01:14:39,305
I wish I could swim forever.
1164
01:14:42,551 --> 01:14:44,546
I wish I had known Anne Frank.
1165
01:14:45,687 --> 01:14:48,647
And that I didn't lust after Joe so much.
1166
01:14:54,663 --> 01:14:56,987
Oh, put that right here.
Boy, can we use that.
1167
01:14:57,433 --> 01:15:00,073
Why don't you stick around and have
a drink? It's almost midnight.
1168
01:15:00,987 --> 01:15:01,987
Oh. Sorry.
1169
01:15:03,974 --> 01:15:05,737
- Hi, handsome.
- Hi, Carrie.
1170
01:15:05,909 --> 01:15:07,433
Nice Caretaker's costume.
1171
01:15:07,788 --> 01:15:08,788
Hi, Joe.
1172
01:15:08,888 --> 01:15:10,538
- Hi, Mrs. Flax. You look nice.
- Thanks.
1173
01:15:10,647 --> 01:15:11,649
- Mrs. Flax.
- Yeah?
1174
01:15:11,750 --> 01:15:14,241
- I think it's time you and I had a little dance.
- Okay.
1175
01:15:18,590 --> 01:15:20,170
Little Bo Peep.
1176
01:15:20,291 --> 01:15:22,230
- Honey, can you help us with these?
- Yes.
1177
01:15:25,898 --> 01:15:27,551
- All right, now spin me.
- Yeah, okay.
1178
01:15:28,491 --> 01:15:30,191
- Watch my tail.
- Yeah. I'm sorry.
1179
01:15:30,737 --> 01:15:33,433
I'm on pins and needles.
Did you win the $20?
1180
01:15:34,192 --> 01:15:36,992
What do you think? I'm
planning a pilgrimage.
1181
01:15:37,092 --> 01:15:38,742
- Lourdes?
- No, Cooperstown.
1182
01:15:39,447 --> 01:15:40,914
- Ask me why.
- No.
1183
01:15:41,048 --> 01:15:43,258
- I'm gonna tell you anyway.
- Yeah, I thought you would.
1184
01:15:43,288 --> 01:15:44,293
Yeah.
1185
01:15:45,788 --> 01:15:47,243
The baseball hall of fame.
1186
01:15:49,024 --> 01:15:50,654
Before I bite the dust,
1187
01:15:50,760 --> 01:15:52,994
there's three things that I want from life:
1188
01:15:53,094 --> 01:15:54,493
To touch Lou Gehrig's glove,
1189
01:15:56,473 --> 01:15:58,033
To be in Florida for Spring Training...
1190
01:15:59,054 --> 01:16:00,874
and to take you with me on both trips.
1191
01:16:01,371 --> 01:16:03,168
Two out of three, that's not bad.
1192
01:16:03,840 --> 01:16:05,775
All right, ask me in a couple of months.
1193
01:16:05,876 --> 01:16:07,234
- You mean if you're still here.
- Exactly.
1194
01:16:07,264 --> 01:16:08,671
Two minutes, everybody!
1195
01:16:08,913 --> 01:16:10,175
Get some champagne!
1196
01:16:10,714 --> 01:16:12,935
Turn up the TV!
1197
01:16:16,286 --> 01:16:18,336
Streamers? Does everybody
have a streamer?
1198
01:16:20,592 --> 01:16:22,177
What are we gonna do, Rachel?
1199
01:16:22,395 --> 01:16:24,527
- About what, Lou?
- This relationship.
1200
01:16:24,630 --> 01:16:27,497
- What's the matter with this relationship?
- It's stuck.
1201
01:16:27,800 --> 01:16:29,558
It has to move or it has to end.
1202
01:16:29,658 --> 01:16:31,178
It can't just stay the same.
1203
01:16:31,939 --> 01:16:34,498
You know, Lou, ultimatums don't
sit really well with me.
1204
01:16:35,178 --> 01:16:38,178
- Noisemakers?
- Thank you, Carrie.
1205
01:16:38,208 --> 01:16:40,045
- Lou?
- No, thank you.
1206
01:16:40,915 --> 01:16:43,249
What would you say if I
asked you to marry me?
1207
01:16:43,651 --> 01:16:45,255
First, I'd remind you that
you're still married,
1208
01:16:45,285 --> 01:16:48,654
and then I'd probably write...
from New Mexico.
1209
01:16:50,426 --> 01:16:51,560
Live with me.
1210
01:16:52,194 --> 01:16:53,194
No.
1211
01:16:54,561 --> 01:16:57,060
Ten, Nine, Eight,
1212
01:16:57,560 --> 01:16:58,757
Seven, Six,
1213
01:16:59,480 --> 01:17:01,181
Five, Four,
1214
01:17:01,269 --> 01:17:04,071
Three, Two, One!
1215
01:17:04,138 --> 01:17:08,443
Happy New Year 1964!
1216
01:17:28,704 --> 01:17:29,534
So far,
1217
01:17:29,636 --> 01:17:31,505
1964's a big drag.
1218
01:17:32,773 --> 01:17:34,245
Are you coming home with me?
1219
01:17:37,912 --> 01:17:39,278
Another night.
1220
01:17:41,486 --> 01:17:42,486
Happy New Year.
1221
01:17:51,525 --> 01:17:55,095
Happy New Year, everybody,
1222
01:17:55,163 --> 01:17:58,831
A Very Happy New Year.
1223
01:18:06,009 --> 01:18:07,488
- Hey, Joe!
- Yeah?
1224
01:18:07,518 --> 01:18:10,077
I think my car's dead.
1225
01:18:10,180 --> 01:18:11,180
You think so?
1226
01:18:15,253 --> 01:18:17,551
- Can you help me?
- Yeah, sure.
1227
01:18:18,570 --> 01:18:19,610
Good.
1228
01:18:39,547 --> 01:18:42,016
Thanks for the ride, Joe.
1229
01:18:42,150 --> 01:18:44,277
Sure. You bet.
1230
01:18:48,493 --> 01:18:50,390
Oh.
1231
01:18:56,966 --> 01:18:57,966
Sorry.
1232
01:18:59,515 --> 01:19:01,494
- Could you help me?
- Yeah.
1233
01:19:02,014 --> 01:19:03,614
I have trouble with this tail.
1234
01:19:06,810 --> 01:19:07,915
Happy New Year, Joe.
1235
01:19:18,223 --> 01:19:19,496
You kissed him?
1236
01:19:20,658 --> 01:19:22,897
You kissed him? How could you do that?
1237
01:19:23,562 --> 01:19:25,717
How could you let her kiss you?
1238
01:19:25,798 --> 01:19:26,717
Charlotte, for God's sake,
1239
01:19:26,747 --> 01:19:28,718
it was just a little New Year's Eve kiss.
1240
01:19:28,818 --> 01:19:30,958
- You don't believe in New Year's.
- I know.
1241
01:19:32,518 --> 01:19:34,706
Hey, what are you guys fighting about?
1242
01:19:34,741 --> 01:19:36,499
- Nothing.
- Everything.
1243
01:19:36,899 --> 01:19:39,699
Come on. Get back in the house before
you freeze your little butt off.
1244
01:19:40,248 --> 01:19:42,394
What's the matter with Charlotte?
Is she gonna run away again?
1245
01:19:42,424 --> 01:19:44,080
God willing. No, just kidding.
1246
01:19:44,580 --> 01:19:47,020
- Did you have a nice time?
- I had a lovely time, thank you.
1247
01:19:47,423 --> 01:19:49,663
Are you gonna stay out there
all night, Miss Poopy Face?
1248
01:19:51,326 --> 01:19:53,124
Why did you let her?
1249
01:19:53,263 --> 01:19:55,821
She kisses everybody. Don't you know that?
1250
01:19:55,899 --> 01:19:58,197
It doesn't mean you're special or anything.
1251
01:19:58,334 --> 01:20:01,222
It doesn't mean she likes
you or anything like that.
1252
01:20:02,582 --> 01:20:04,501
She doesn't like anybody!
1253
01:20:36,610 --> 01:20:39,671
Okay, Mom. You want to drive Lou away,
1254
01:20:39,848 --> 01:20:40,848
that's your business.
1255
01:20:41,649 --> 01:20:44,516
You want Joe... that's war.
1256
01:21:06,977 --> 01:21:09,028
Care to dance, Mrs. Flax?
1257
01:21:09,479 --> 01:21:11,641
Mrs. Polka Flax.
1258
01:21:15,153 --> 01:21:17,485
She's gonna kill you if you put those on.
1259
01:21:17,655 --> 01:21:19,214
Go back to your rocks, Kate.
1260
01:21:19,858 --> 01:21:20,858
Okay.
1261
01:21:30,136 --> 01:21:32,971
Act your age, not your shoe size.
1262
01:21:33,732 --> 01:21:34,732
Who's this?
1263
01:21:35,212 --> 01:21:37,232
"Know your colors, know your fabrics."
1264
01:21:37,311 --> 01:21:39,332
"That's what I tell all my little girls."
1265
01:21:45,420 --> 01:21:46,967
Katie, shall I tell you a secret?
1266
01:21:47,055 --> 01:21:48,055
Yeah.
1267
01:21:48,933 --> 01:21:50,934
I'm in love with Joe Peretti.
1268
01:21:51,160 --> 01:21:52,734
- Do you kiss each other?
- Yes.
1269
01:21:52,828 --> 01:21:54,934
- On the lips?
- Yes.
1270
01:21:55,094 --> 01:21:57,235
Like Superman and Lois Lane?
1271
01:21:57,366 --> 01:21:59,467
Well...
1272
01:21:59,670 --> 01:22:01,035
What's it like?
1273
01:22:01,635 --> 01:22:03,534
Sometimes when you kiss a person,
1274
01:22:03,564 --> 01:22:05,066
it's like nothing happens.
1275
01:22:05,096 --> 01:22:06,100
It's like you're kissing your hand...
1276
01:22:06,130 --> 01:22:08,336
or you're kissing yourself in the mirror,
1277
01:22:08,736 --> 01:22:10,873
But when it's someone you love...
1278
01:22:11,014 --> 01:22:12,736
I know. There's chemicals.
1279
01:22:12,976 --> 01:22:15,216
- You mean chemistry, Fish Head.
- Oh.
1280
01:22:15,820 --> 01:22:17,036
Okay. How do I look?
1281
01:22:17,088 --> 01:22:19,216
Like someone drew all over you.
1282
01:22:20,837 --> 01:22:21,737
Let's Celebrate.
1283
01:22:21,837 --> 01:22:22,837
Cool.
1284
01:22:33,139 --> 01:22:34,731
What are you doing?
1285
01:22:34,908 --> 01:22:37,901
Sucking out the pimentos.
They give me hernias.
1286
01:22:38,546 --> 01:22:40,099
You mean, hives, Fish Head.
1287
01:22:41,182 --> 01:22:42,979
Hit me, sergeant.
1288
01:22:43,718 --> 01:22:45,790
Okay, but you can only have one,
1289
01:22:45,887 --> 01:22:47,840
and you have to sip it. Okay?
1290
01:23:02,973 --> 01:23:04,602
Tell me about when I was born.
1291
01:23:05,909 --> 01:23:08,293
- Aren't you sick of hearing this story?
- No.
1292
01:23:09,981 --> 01:23:11,005
Okay.
1293
01:23:12,082 --> 01:23:15,951
You were born in a
hospital in Minneapolis...
1294
01:23:16,087 --> 01:23:18,055
on a cold Winter's day.
1295
01:23:18,590 --> 01:23:20,785
And when Mrs. Flax brought you home,
1296
01:23:20,925 --> 01:23:22,825
I pretended you were mine.
1297
01:23:23,496 --> 01:23:24,644
Where was Pop?
1298
01:23:26,632 --> 01:23:27,826
I don't know.
1299
01:23:37,511 --> 01:23:39,386
Come on, I'll show you the convent.
1300
01:23:51,894 --> 01:23:53,047
Finish the story.
1301
01:23:53,529 --> 01:23:54,948
Come on. I'll show you the tower.
1302
01:23:55,065 --> 01:23:56,108
You've never seen it.
1303
01:24:30,002 --> 01:24:33,461
- Look, there it is. Isn't it neat?
- Neat.
1304
01:24:34,007 --> 01:24:35,736
I want to go up. I'm gonna go up.
1305
01:24:35,876 --> 01:24:38,752
- Not me. I'll fall off.
- No, you won't.
1306
01:24:41,081 --> 01:24:43,277
How you gonna get up there in those shoes?
1307
01:24:43,418 --> 01:24:44,616
I'll manage.
1308
01:24:45,920 --> 01:24:47,253
I'm gonna go collect rocks.
1309
01:24:47,789 --> 01:24:50,534
Okay. I'll be right back,
so don't go anywhere.
1310
01:24:50,754 --> 01:24:51,754
- Okay.
- Okay, bye.
1311
01:26:47,456 --> 01:26:49,822
Oh, god, this is real.
1312
01:26:50,359 --> 01:26:51,724
This is really real.
1313
01:27:43,217 --> 01:27:43,808
Joseph! Come quick!
1314
01:27:43,952 --> 01:27:45,146
Get her inside.
1315
01:27:51,327 --> 01:27:52,327
Katie!
1316
01:27:55,097 --> 01:27:57,675
Look, Joseph, get an ambulance.
1317
01:27:59,267 --> 01:28:03,136
Oh, Katie! Katie! Oh, Katie!
1318
01:28:03,204 --> 01:28:05,973
Katie. Katie.
1319
01:28:06,041 --> 01:28:09,711
Katie, please don't die. Please don't die.
1320
01:28:38,579 --> 01:28:40,108
Joe, take Charlotte home,
1321
01:28:40,314 --> 01:28:42,111
we'll call when there's news.
1322
01:28:42,249 --> 01:28:43,249
Tell Lou.
1323
01:31:04,275 --> 01:31:06,743
Katydid...
1324
01:31:09,377 --> 01:31:13,315
You were born in a
hospital in Minneapolis...
1325
01:31:13,382 --> 01:31:15,818
on a cold Winter day.
1326
01:31:15,921 --> 01:31:18,014
I brought you home...
1327
01:31:18,190 --> 01:31:21,698
and Charlotte pretended that you were hers.
1328
01:31:22,094 --> 01:31:24,798
She even tried to make you call her Mom.
1329
01:31:27,659 --> 01:31:32,335
And we... we...
1330
01:31:32,402 --> 01:31:33,998
We tickled your ears,
1331
01:31:34,106 --> 01:31:36,399
and we watched you sleep...
1332
01:31:37,211 --> 01:31:40,375
and... the only thing that...
1333
01:31:42,279 --> 01:31:45,744
The only thing that we ever agreed on...
1334
01:31:45,887 --> 01:31:47,600
was that you were...
1335
01:31:47,787 --> 01:31:50,799
a wonderful child.
1336
01:32:32,139 --> 01:32:35,107
Charlotte? Charlotte?
1337
01:32:38,345 --> 01:32:39,778
She's gonna be all right.
1338
01:32:40,481 --> 01:32:43,678
They're keeping her in one
more night for observation.
1339
01:32:46,554 --> 01:32:48,987
Your mother's on her way home
to pick up some clothes.
1340
01:33:06,777 --> 01:33:07,777
She's okay.
1341
01:33:12,617 --> 01:33:13,710
She's okay.
1342
01:33:34,041 --> 01:33:35,353
You look different.
1343
01:33:38,244 --> 01:33:39,362
You look beautiful.
1344
01:33:49,691 --> 01:33:51,750
- Take care.
- You too.
1345
01:33:52,794 --> 01:33:55,194
- Okay. Bye.
- Bye.
1346
01:35:01,004 --> 01:35:03,004
If you're smart, you'll
just stay away from me.
1347
01:35:19,024 --> 01:35:20,024
I mean it.
1348
01:35:31,605 --> 01:35:33,626
You want to take the book?
1349
01:35:34,241 --> 01:35:36,232
What the hell were you thinking about?
1350
01:35:36,410 --> 01:35:37,476
She could have died!
1351
01:35:37,544 --> 01:35:40,480
Your sister, who you were supposed
to be watching, could have died!
1352
01:35:40,615 --> 01:35:42,026
What was she doing up there?
1353
01:35:42,076 --> 01:35:43,006
What the hell were you doing...
1354
01:35:43,050 --> 01:35:44,686
I know what you were doing up there.
1355
01:35:44,876 --> 01:35:47,877
The whole goddamn town knows
what you were doing up there.
1356
01:35:49,255 --> 01:35:51,356
Mom. Mom...
1357
01:35:51,424 --> 01:35:53,051
I'm warning you, I'm angry!
1358
01:35:53,161 --> 01:35:55,128
I'm crazy angry!
1359
01:35:58,000 --> 01:36:01,368
Don't walk away from me, Mom!
You're not gonna walk away from me!
1360
01:36:01,505 --> 01:36:04,879
I am not invisible! Talk to me!
1361
01:36:04,972 --> 01:36:07,507
Now!
1362
01:36:07,611 --> 01:36:09,310
Yes, I made a mistake!
1363
01:36:09,347 --> 01:36:11,690
Yes, I am really, really sorry!
1364
01:36:11,749 --> 01:36:15,207
It was a big mistake! I know that!
1365
01:36:15,386 --> 01:36:17,441
You make mistakes! You're
always screwing up,
1366
01:36:17,471 --> 01:36:18,811
and we're always paying for it!
1367
01:36:18,857 --> 01:36:21,931
Every time you get dumped! Every
time you dump on somebody!
1368
01:36:22,011 --> 01:36:23,131
And it's just...
1369
01:36:23,531 --> 01:36:25,832
it's not fair, Mom! It is not fair!
1370
01:36:29,536 --> 01:36:30,536
God!
1371
01:36:42,050 --> 01:36:44,693
I am sick and tired of being judged by you.
1372
01:36:44,793 --> 01:36:45,456
You're a kid!
1373
01:36:45,486 --> 01:36:46,632
Okay. When you become an adult,
1374
01:36:46,662 --> 01:36:48,233
you can live your life any way you want to!
1375
01:36:48,263 --> 01:36:49,034
But until then,
1376
01:36:49,064 --> 01:36:51,014
we're gonna live my life my way!
1377
01:36:55,130 --> 01:36:56,135
Start packing.
1378
01:36:57,633 --> 01:36:59,835
- No!
- I said pack!
1379
01:37:00,069 --> 01:37:00,975
This move is on you!
1380
01:37:01,070 --> 01:37:03,194
If lover boy doesn't like it,
that's too goddamn bad!
1381
01:37:03,224 --> 01:37:05,696
This is not about him!
This is about me, okay?
1382
01:37:05,809 --> 01:37:07,636
That's over! He is gone! He has left!
1383
01:37:07,686 --> 01:37:10,136
- Surprise, surprise!
- No, it's not like that!
1384
01:37:10,236 --> 01:37:13,697
Maybe your life works for you,
but it doesn't work for me,
1385
01:37:13,797 --> 01:37:15,172
- and I want to stay!
- And do what?
1386
01:37:15,202 --> 01:37:16,487
Finish High School!
1387
01:37:16,588 --> 01:37:18,837
Great start. What's your major? Town tramp?
1388
01:37:18,917 --> 01:37:21,018
No, Mom, the town already has one.
1389
01:37:56,565 --> 01:37:57,565
You know...
1390
01:37:58,701 --> 01:38:01,802
You're just one year younger
than I was when I had you.
1391
01:38:02,436 --> 01:38:04,202
If you hate my life so much,
1392
01:38:04,274 --> 01:38:07,743
why are you doing your damnedest
to make the same mistakes?
1393
01:38:16,321 --> 01:38:18,624
How do you feel about this guy?
1394
01:38:20,725 --> 01:38:22,545
I thought I loved him.
1395
01:38:22,705 --> 01:38:24,025
That sounds familiar.
1396
01:38:26,866 --> 01:38:29,706
And I thought you were gonna take him away.
1397
01:38:42,850 --> 01:38:44,247
Did you love my father?
1398
01:38:44,316 --> 01:38:47,486
Yeah, I did.
1399
01:38:52,027 --> 01:38:54,027
What was he like?
1400
01:38:57,208 --> 01:39:00,660
Oh, he was charming and...
1401
01:39:00,803 --> 01:39:02,599
He made me feel really special...
1402
01:39:02,706 --> 01:39:04,329
for about a minute and a half.
1403
01:39:05,375 --> 01:39:06,809
And then he was gone.
1404
01:39:10,314 --> 01:39:11,810
What did he look like?
1405
01:39:11,916 --> 01:39:13,650
He looked like you, only taller.
1406
01:39:15,753 --> 01:39:17,251
I don't have any pictures.
1407
01:39:17,356 --> 01:39:19,251
We took pictures at the wedding,
1408
01:39:19,331 --> 01:39:21,031
and they didn't come out.
1409
01:39:21,960 --> 01:39:24,652
I guess I should have known then.
1410
01:39:25,465 --> 01:39:27,302
He's never coming back, is he?
1411
01:39:27,352 --> 01:39:28,352
No.
1412
01:39:32,673 --> 01:39:34,233
Has he ever even seen me?
1413
01:39:34,341 --> 01:39:36,713
Yeah, he did once. You were about four.
1414
01:39:39,747 --> 01:39:41,274
He wanted us back?
1415
01:39:41,354 --> 01:39:42,494
No, he met some other woman,
1416
01:39:42,554 --> 01:39:44,714
and he wanted to get married.
1417
01:39:50,493 --> 01:39:52,654
How do you feel about Joe leaving?
1418
01:39:58,834 --> 01:39:59,834
It's fine.
1419
01:40:04,074 --> 01:40:08,156
I guess it's a little too late for
our Birds-and-Bees Talk, isn't it?
1420
01:40:12,517 --> 01:40:14,337
Mom...
1421
01:40:17,217 --> 01:40:19,838
Can we please stay?
1422
01:40:21,560 --> 01:40:22,828
I don't know, Charlotte.
1423
01:40:22,928 --> 01:40:25,458
There's gonna be so much talk.
This is such a small town.
1424
01:40:26,165 --> 01:40:27,859
You know, there's always talk.
1425
01:40:27,934 --> 01:40:30,059
It's just usually it's about you.
1426
01:40:31,719 --> 01:40:32,819
Sorry.
1427
01:40:40,145 --> 01:40:43,721
Just for a year. Just give it a year.
1428
01:40:45,652 --> 01:40:47,653
Okay?
1429
01:40:50,893 --> 01:40:52,258
I don't know.
1430
01:41:02,305 --> 01:41:05,342
Mrs. Flax promised she'd try and stay put.
1431
01:41:06,677 --> 01:41:08,723
I knew that would be a
hard one for her to keep.
1432
01:41:22,394 --> 01:41:25,105
But three months later, she
and Lou were still sparring.
1433
01:41:28,200 --> 01:41:29,966
He took us to the
baseball hall of fame;
1434
01:41:30,036 --> 01:41:31,469
his idea of heaven.
1435
01:41:31,605 --> 01:41:33,346
- Mom was kind of bored,
- Come here.
1436
01:41:33,773 --> 01:41:35,726
But we thought she hid it quite well.
1437
01:41:38,045 --> 01:41:41,267
This... this is Lou Gehrig's glove.
1438
01:41:41,682 --> 01:41:43,616
You see that?
1439
01:41:43,751 --> 01:41:45,743
Okay, you touched it. All right, guys.
1440
01:41:46,522 --> 01:41:48,045
- What's for lunch?
- I don't know.
1441
01:41:48,075 --> 01:41:49,046
Hey... Come on.
1442
01:41:58,433 --> 01:41:59,991
If they squeeze your toes,
1443
01:42:00,135 --> 01:42:03,049
chew them for a couple hours.
It softens them up real nice.
1444
01:42:03,473 --> 01:42:06,409
You don't believe me?
Eskimos do it all the time.
1445
01:42:06,643 --> 01:42:08,373
Their wives do it, yeah.
1446
01:42:08,512 --> 01:42:10,650
Would you do that for your
old man, chew his shoes?
1447
01:42:10,730 --> 01:42:12,130
- I don't think so. Bye-bye.
- Bye.
1448
01:42:15,352 --> 01:42:16,731
Hey, give me a break.
1449
01:42:17,289 --> 01:42:18,571
I'm a nice old man.
1450
01:42:18,671 --> 01:42:20,111
I'd watch it if I were you, Lou.
1451
01:42:20,625 --> 01:42:22,145
I might decide to move to a real city.
1452
01:42:23,028 --> 01:42:24,972
I hate all these trees and weather.
1453
01:42:26,352 --> 01:42:27,563
Ta-ta.
1454
01:42:28,000 --> 01:42:30,872
She won't admit it, but
they get along real well.
1455
01:42:32,239 --> 01:42:33,239
Yeah...
1456
01:42:34,341 --> 01:42:37,513
Trees and weather can
really get to a person.
1457
01:42:53,493 --> 01:42:55,929
Let me take these for you.
1458
01:42:56,066 --> 01:42:58,236
I got quite a reputation for a while.
1459
01:42:58,802 --> 01:43:01,175
Even Mary O’Brien was impressed.
1460
01:43:01,515 --> 01:43:02,451
It's not easy,
1461
01:43:02,504 --> 01:43:05,531
but I'm trying to keep
romance on the back burner.
1462
01:43:14,919 --> 01:43:17,377
Joe moved to California
and opened up a Nursery.
1463
01:43:17,888 --> 01:43:18,738
We still write.
1464
01:43:18,857 --> 01:43:22,691
He sends me funny postcards
with palm trees on them.
1465
01:43:35,509 --> 01:43:37,456
Greek Myths are my new passion.
1466
01:43:42,315 --> 01:43:43,649
Hi.
1467
01:43:47,689 --> 01:43:49,361
Charlotte, we're not Greek.
1468
01:43:53,162 --> 01:43:54,782
Kate's back in Olympic Form,
1469
01:43:55,865 --> 01:43:57,082
But, since the accident,
1470
01:43:57,166 --> 01:43:58,783
sometimes her hearing gets fuzzy.
1471
01:44:01,837 --> 01:44:04,742
I think I heard Mom say she'd be
making a main course tonight.
1472
01:44:11,363 --> 01:44:12,745
- Nah.
- Nah.
1473
01:46:33,637 --> 01:46:35,739
Hey, what are you doing
with that thing in here?
1474
01:46:35,807 --> 01:46:37,908
- Indoor Swimming?
- No way.
1475
01:46:37,975 --> 01:46:40,243
- Take it out of here.
- Mom.
1475
01:46:41,305 --> 01:46:47,159
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