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1
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Good morning, winner.
2
00:00:13,130 --> 00:00:14,963
Take a deep breath.
3
00:00:17,338 --> 00:00:18,422
Good.
4
00:00:18,505 --> 00:00:20,922
You're ready to dominate this day.
5
00:00:22,088 --> 00:00:24,588
You've worked harder than everyone,
6
00:00:24,672 --> 00:00:27,880
and that is why you're a champion.
7
00:00:28,380 --> 00:00:31,797
You understand that greatness
takes sacrifice.
8
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Visualize what you still want to achieve.
9
00:00:36,172 --> 00:00:38,755
Stand atop the mountain of your success
10
00:00:38,838 --> 00:00:41,463
and look down at everyone
11
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who's ever doubted you.
12
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Fuck those losers.
13
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Fuck them in their stupid fucking faces.
14
00:00:58,297 --> 00:01:00,005
Hey!
15
00:01:00,088 --> 00:01:01,588
- Oh!
- Oh!
16
00:01:01,672 --> 00:01:02,672
Oh, shit.
17
00:01:04,213 --> 00:01:05,588
Hold the phone!
18
00:01:06,005 --> 00:01:07,047
I'm comin'!
19
00:01:07,922 --> 00:01:09,630
Oh, shit.
20
00:01:09,713 --> 00:01:12,088
Whoo!
21
00:01:16,505 --> 00:01:18,505
- What?
- What? Excuse me.
22
00:01:19,130 --> 00:01:20,338
- Oh, oh.
- What?
23
00:01:20,422 --> 00:01:21,505
- Oh.
- What?
24
00:01:21,588 --> 00:01:22,588
- Hey.
- What?
25
00:01:22,672 --> 00:01:24,422
- Missed ya!
- I missed you.
26
00:01:25,047 --> 00:01:26,847
- I missed you so much.
- It's been one night.
27
00:01:29,255 --> 00:01:31,130
- Are we gonna go to school, or...
- No.
28
00:01:32,255 --> 00:01:33,255
I don't think we are.
29
00:01:33,297 --> 00:01:35,880
No, we're just gonna stay... here.
30
00:01:47,963 --> 00:01:49,672
- Move!
- Jeez!
31
00:01:55,630 --> 00:01:57,463
Are you...
32
00:01:57,547 --> 00:01:59,338
- Whoo!
- I swear to God.
33
00:01:59,922 --> 00:02:00,981
- Whoo!
- What are you doing?
34
00:02:01,005 --> 00:02:03,725
- Are you kidding me? Samantha!
- You couldn't have just gone around?
35
00:02:03,838 --> 00:02:06,838
Where was this energy
at my inauguration assembly, folks?
36
00:02:06,922 --> 00:02:07,755
True.
37
00:02:07,838 --> 00:02:11,463
I hope I never have
to see any of you ever again, okay?
38
00:02:11,547 --> 00:02:12,797
That's it. Signin' off.
39
00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:14,380
Go, Crocketts!
40
00:02:15,380 --> 00:02:16,380
Boom.
41
00:02:16,922 --> 00:02:19,422
- Principal Brown?
- Oh...
42
00:02:20,088 --> 00:02:22,255
Hi, Molly, Amy. What's shakin'?
43
00:02:22,338 --> 00:02:24,814
I want to make the transition
of next year's student government
44
00:02:24,838 --> 00:02:25,838
as seamless as possible,
45
00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:29,297
- so that when I'm up in New Haven...
- Yale. You can just say Yale, please.
46
00:02:29,380 --> 00:02:32,088
Well, our class's official policy
is to not discuss
47
00:02:32,172 --> 00:02:33,612
where anyone is attending next year.
48
00:02:33,672 --> 00:02:35,588
We don't want them to feel insecure.
49
00:02:35,672 --> 00:02:36,547
Very thoughtful.
50
00:02:36,630 --> 00:02:39,047
I need to go over the end of the year
budget numbers we have.
51
00:02:40,380 --> 00:02:41,380
Gosh.
52
00:02:41,922 --> 00:02:42,922
Really?
53
00:02:43,088 --> 00:02:44,088
Like, now?
54
00:02:44,630 --> 00:02:47,047
I mean, why don't you do it with Nick?
You know, please?
55
00:02:47,130 --> 00:02:49,090
I mean, he's... you know,
he's the vice president.
56
00:02:49,130 --> 00:02:50,130
Nick?
57
00:02:50,755 --> 00:02:52,422
Oh!
58
00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:55,338
We both know that Nick only ran for VP
because they plan the dances.
59
00:02:55,422 --> 00:02:56,588
That position is...
60
00:02:57,338 --> 00:02:59,422
It's basically a popularity contest.
He's useless.
61
00:02:59,505 --> 00:03:01,797
Ladies, it's the last day, you know?
62
00:03:02,463 --> 00:03:03,463
We did it, huh?
63
00:03:03,505 --> 00:03:05,005
We got you through high school.
64
00:03:05,088 --> 00:03:07,088
Can't we just graduate,
head off to college,
65
00:03:07,172 --> 00:03:09,755
you know,
celebrate this wonderful achievement?
66
00:03:09,838 --> 00:03:12,273
Let's get through the day
without anything horrible happening.
67
00:03:12,297 --> 00:03:14,977
Sorry, are you shutting the door on us?
Not subtle. We will persist!
68
00:03:16,338 --> 00:03:18,255
Nick's like the great equalizer.
69
00:03:19,338 --> 00:03:23,422
Delegates from every group of girls
are casting their ballots for his penis.
70
00:03:23,755 --> 00:03:25,422
Oh, Triple A takes the lead.
71
00:03:26,005 --> 00:03:27,422
Don't call her that.
72
00:03:27,505 --> 00:03:28,880
Everybody calls her that.
73
00:03:28,963 --> 00:03:31,323
She gave roadside assistance
to three senior guys last year.
74
00:03:31,630 --> 00:03:33,547
You hear them
getting degrading nicknames?
75
00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:35,255
They call Sam Ross "Dick Splinter."
76
00:03:35,588 --> 00:03:38,213
That's not derogatory,
it's a factual description.
77
00:03:38,713 --> 00:03:40,755
- 7:20.
- Under eight minutes?
78
00:03:40,838 --> 00:03:42,297
- You're joking!
- Aah!
79
00:03:42,380 --> 00:03:44,213
Oh, my God. 9:43.
80
00:03:44,297 --> 00:03:46,213
What am I gonna do
without you girls next year?
81
00:03:46,297 --> 00:03:48,097
Nobody around here
even attempts the Thursday.
82
00:03:48,172 --> 00:03:50,922
Well, Amy and I are gonna Skype
the puzzle every single week,
83
00:03:51,005 --> 00:03:52,731
- so we will send you our Sunday Times.
- Yep.
84
00:03:52,755 --> 00:03:54,915
You know what?
Why don't I just give you two my number?
85
00:03:54,963 --> 00:03:58,005
That way, you guys can call or text me
if you need anything.
86
00:03:58,422 --> 00:04:00,672
- Yeah! That would make our lives.
- Yeah. Cool.
87
00:04:00,755 --> 00:04:01,963
- We'd love that.
- Definitely.
88
00:04:02,047 --> 00:04:04,213
- I'll give you mine after.
- I'll share the contact.
89
00:04:04,297 --> 00:04:05,481
- I can give...
- I'll share it.
90
00:04:05,505 --> 00:04:08,380
Wait. Miss Fine, I thought there were
no cell phones allowed in class.
91
00:04:08,463 --> 00:04:10,963
- Or are there exceptions for ass-kissers?
- Hey.
92
00:04:11,463 --> 00:04:12,547
A dollar in the swear jar.
93
00:04:12,630 --> 00:04:15,380
I'm so sorry.
These shorts, they don't have pockets.
94
00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:18,297
- Okay, excuse me. Excuse me. Jesus Christ!
- Whoa, Triple A!
95
00:04:18,380 --> 00:04:19,380
Oh, my God.
96
00:04:19,422 --> 00:04:21,981
- No spatial awareness at this school.
- People just really don't.
97
00:04:22,005 --> 00:04:23,255
- Hey, Amy?
- It's her!
98
00:04:23,755 --> 00:04:24,588
Yeah?
99
00:04:24,672 --> 00:04:26,672
Did you just score
your teacher's phone number?
100
00:04:27,130 --> 00:04:28,130
Yeah.
101
00:04:28,172 --> 00:04:29,338
Nice.
102
00:04:32,713 --> 00:04:33,880
Hey, Miss Fine?
103
00:04:33,963 --> 00:04:35,588
You should come party with us tonight.
104
00:04:35,672 --> 00:04:38,880
Did you just ask Miss Fine
if she wants to party with you?
105
00:04:38,963 --> 00:04:41,314
You think she wants to watch you
get drunk and break things?
106
00:04:41,338 --> 00:04:44,380
Hold on. I was having a conversation
with her. You're not part of this.
107
00:04:44,463 --> 00:04:45,463
- I'm...
- Sit down, Theo.
108
00:04:45,505 --> 00:04:47,755
Yo, yo. What up, Miss Fine?
109
00:04:48,130 --> 00:04:50,172
Just a last day present
for my favorite teach.
110
00:04:50,255 --> 00:04:53,047
- Jared, you are not my student.
- I've heard great things.
111
00:04:53,130 --> 00:04:56,380
And, hey, everybody else
got their graduation gifts, right?
112
00:04:56,672 --> 00:04:57,672
Come on.
113
00:04:57,713 --> 00:04:59,838
Jare Bear coming at you
from all angles, right?
114
00:04:59,922 --> 00:05:01,148
- Nobody asked for that.
- Uhh...
115
00:05:01,172 --> 00:05:04,213
Big me, littler me,
little baby Jared at the bottom.
116
00:05:04,297 --> 00:05:06,463
Baby Jared says,
"Happy graduation, everybody!"
117
00:05:06,547 --> 00:05:09,713
Yeah, no one's gonna wear a shirt
with your face on it, Jared.
118
00:05:09,797 --> 00:05:11,463
Like, not even ironically.
119
00:05:11,547 --> 00:05:13,838
Okay, well, agree to disagree, 'cause...
120
00:05:13,922 --> 00:05:15,213
Jared, just go.
121
00:05:15,297 --> 00:05:17,547
I'm out of here. Wasn't even here.
See you, Molly.
122
00:05:18,047 --> 00:05:19,713
- Bye, Molly.
- I'll see ya.
123
00:05:19,797 --> 00:05:20,939
Bye, Molly.
124
00:05:20,963 --> 00:05:23,588
- Why does he always do that?
- Fair townspeople!
125
00:05:23,672 --> 00:05:25,172
Fair townspeople?
126
00:05:25,797 --> 00:05:27,255
Fair townspeople, I swear to God!
127
00:05:27,338 --> 00:05:30,088
- What?
- Mark thy calendars
128
00:05:30,172 --> 00:05:34,172
and make thy plans to attend
the drama department's summer program,
129
00:05:34,505 --> 00:05:36,922
Shakespeare in the Park... ing Lot.
130
00:05:37,963 --> 00:05:42,088
We will be performing the Bard's comedies
as modern tragedies
131
00:05:42,172 --> 00:05:44,213
outside Whole Foods across town.
132
00:05:44,297 --> 00:05:45,657
Well, it's actually funny. It's...
133
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:47,505
It's what we did in my summer program
134
00:05:47,588 --> 00:05:49,588
- last year in...
- Barcelona,
135
00:05:49,672 --> 00:05:51,463
when I lived in Barcelona.
136
00:05:51,547 --> 00:05:53,047
I will be directing,
137
00:05:53,505 --> 00:05:54,963
and Alan...
138
00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:58,047
may be starring, pending auditions.
139
00:05:58,547 --> 00:06:00,213
I don't audition.
140
00:06:00,838 --> 00:06:02,297
I'm offer only.
141
00:06:03,005 --> 00:06:05,922
This looks fun, but I'm not gonna...
I'm not gonna be here.
142
00:06:06,255 --> 00:06:08,005
Yeah, Amy's spending the summer
in Botswana,
143
00:06:08,088 --> 00:06:09,630
helping women make their own tampons.
144
00:06:09,713 --> 00:06:10,713
That's...
145
00:06:11,005 --> 00:06:11,838
gross.
146
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:14,630
Well, blood attracts lions.
I'm saving lives.
147
00:06:14,713 --> 00:06:18,422
Oh, okay. Well, that's actually noble.
I, too, have a fear of big cats.
148
00:06:18,505 --> 00:06:22,255
And I can't because I'm working
all summer, and also, I don't want to.
149
00:06:22,338 --> 00:06:23,255
You are a philistine.
150
00:06:23,338 --> 00:06:25,380
Why would you do theater
when you could do debate?
151
00:06:25,463 --> 00:06:27,922
Because some of us
enjoy working with others.
152
00:06:28,005 --> 00:06:29,547
And some of us know how to win.
153
00:06:29,630 --> 00:06:31,338
Nobody's winning in that outfit.
154
00:06:31,422 --> 00:06:33,262
Sit down, y'all.
We got work to do.
155
00:06:33,297 --> 00:06:35,088
- So, Molly...
- Mmm?
156
00:06:35,172 --> 00:06:36,812
- Why don't you start us off?
- Thank you.
157
00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:37,755
Kill it.
158
00:06:37,838 --> 00:06:40,463
All right, well, as you might recall
from my analysis yesterday,
159
00:06:40,547 --> 00:06:42,314
- we were talking about...
- It's our last day!
160
00:06:42,338 --> 00:06:44,273
- Let us live! God!
- ...submitting to authority...
161
00:06:44,297 --> 00:06:45,422
You've gotta open...
162
00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:48,380
You've gotta open your mouth
a little bit more, all right?
163
00:06:48,463 --> 00:06:50,343
- Yeah, okay, I gotcha, I gotcha.
- Okay, chips!
164
00:06:50,380 --> 00:06:52,273
- All right, this is it.
- I gotcha. Ready?
165
00:06:52,297 --> 00:06:54,564
- Dude, how am I supposed to get there?
- That was my bad.
166
00:06:54,588 --> 00:06:55,630
- Nick?
- You're wild.
167
00:06:55,713 --> 00:06:57,513
- Nick.
- Wait, just one sec. Just... come on.
168
00:06:57,588 --> 00:06:59,731
Nick, there's some student government
stuff to go over.
169
00:06:59,755 --> 00:07:00,995
Come on, man, aim for my mouth!
170
00:07:01,047 --> 00:07:03,439
We have to go over the end of year budget,
so if you could...
171
00:07:03,463 --> 00:07:06,255
Yeah, just, we're playin' this game
where I've gotta catch it with...
172
00:07:06,338 --> 00:07:08,458
It's complicated.
I'll... I'll hit you later, I guess.
173
00:07:08,505 --> 00:07:09,880
I'm sure it's complicated.
174
00:07:09,963 --> 00:07:10,797
Oh!
175
00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:14,922
I cannot believe I lasted an entire year
with Nick as my vice president.
176
00:07:15,297 --> 00:07:17,797
He's allergic to work.
All he wants to do is goof off.
177
00:07:17,880 --> 00:07:18,880
It's infuriating.
178
00:07:31,588 --> 00:07:32,838
Go talk to Ryan.
179
00:07:33,797 --> 00:07:34,963
What? No.
180
00:07:36,047 --> 00:07:38,463
Cool, cool, 'cause I'm...
I'm gonna go talk to Ryan.
181
00:07:38,547 --> 00:07:40,588
- 'Cause I have so much to say...
- No, no, no.
182
00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:45,838
- Yeah?
- Fine.
183
00:07:46,047 --> 00:07:47,672
Just... I'm going.
184
00:07:47,838 --> 00:07:49,422
- Just gonna...
- There she goes.
185
00:08:02,130 --> 00:08:03,981
- Oh, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
- Oh, dude.
186
00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:04,838
Amy.
187
00:08:04,922 --> 00:08:06,463
- It's all good.
- Here you go.
188
00:08:06,547 --> 00:08:07,713
Sharp elbows.
189
00:08:07,797 --> 00:08:09,713
Not as sharp as your... chin.
190
00:08:10,172 --> 00:08:11,172
What?
191
00:08:11,547 --> 00:08:13,880
Um... so isn't it crazy
that it's... it's the last day?
192
00:08:13,963 --> 00:08:15,963
I know, dude. I can barely believe it.
193
00:08:16,047 --> 00:08:17,672
Are you gonna come to Nick's tonight?
194
00:08:17,755 --> 00:08:19,755
His aunt went on a cruise ship
that broke down,
195
00:08:19,838 --> 00:08:21,588
so Nick's gonna throw a party
at her house.
196
00:08:21,672 --> 00:08:23,088
That's... that's awesome.
197
00:08:23,588 --> 00:08:24,713
It's... it's all right.
198
00:08:24,797 --> 00:08:27,463
They're, you know, they're stuck
on a boat shitting in buckets.
199
00:08:27,547 --> 00:08:29,005
Oh, that's not really what I meant.
200
00:08:29,547 --> 00:08:30,922
Oh, Jesus.
201
00:08:31,005 --> 00:08:32,805
- Come on, Tanner.
- All right, well...
202
00:08:33,338 --> 00:08:35,005
All right, I'll see you later.
203
00:08:35,380 --> 00:08:36,422
I'll just, um...
204
00:08:37,005 --> 00:08:38,255
Fuck. Fuck, fuck.
205
00:08:38,338 --> 00:08:40,058
- What are you doing? Go back.
- Fuck, fuck.
206
00:08:40,088 --> 00:08:41,728
No, that was bad. That was bad. I'm good.
207
00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:43,338
I don't even know if she's into girls.
208
00:08:43,422 --> 00:08:44,838
She wore a polo shirt to prom.
209
00:08:44,922 --> 00:08:47,297
Well, that's just her gender performance.
210
00:08:47,380 --> 00:08:49,060
It's different from
her sexual orientation.
211
00:08:49,130 --> 00:08:50,505
I'm sorry, but I don't get it.
212
00:08:50,588 --> 00:08:54,297
- Well, gender is a construct of...
- No. Thank you. That much I understand.
213
00:08:54,380 --> 00:08:56,588
It's just... it's a little bit shocking
214
00:08:56,672 --> 00:08:58,338
that... that you're into Ryan.
215
00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:01,422
First crush, the little white cat
from The Aristocats.
216
00:09:01,505 --> 00:09:03,130
You go from that to Avril Lavigne.
217
00:09:03,213 --> 00:09:05,297
It just... it's not...
it's not what I anticipated.
218
00:09:05,380 --> 00:09:06,880
I just like that she's...
219
00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:10,588
always in a good mood,
and she's got a really cute smile.
220
00:09:11,088 --> 00:09:13,797
She just seems like
she'd be a really fun person
221
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:15,797
to have sleepovers and lie around with.
222
00:09:15,880 --> 00:09:19,297
Excuse me, pardon me? I'm a fun person
to have sleepovers and lie around with.
223
00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:20,463
It's literally all we do.
224
00:09:20,547 --> 00:09:22,672
Well, with her, there'd be more...
225
00:09:24,213 --> 00:09:25,338
vagina involved.
226
00:09:25,838 --> 00:09:26,838
That's fair.
227
00:09:27,088 --> 00:09:28,713
She said Nick's having a party tonight.
228
00:09:28,797 --> 00:09:31,838
Of course he would.
He's so fucking stupid.
229
00:09:31,922 --> 00:09:34,797
Somebody always gets arrested
the night before graduation.
230
00:09:36,547 --> 00:09:39,588
Amy, do you know how many girls
are gonna be up your vagina
231
00:09:39,672 --> 00:09:40,981
at Columbia next year?
232
00:09:41,005 --> 00:09:43,047
Are you aware of it?
'Cause I'm aware of it.
233
00:09:43,130 --> 00:09:46,630
Every time I come to visit you, you're
just gonna be scissoring a different girl.
234
00:09:46,713 --> 00:09:47,797
Dude?
235
00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:49,172
Scissoring is not a thing.
236
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:51,880
- Don't knock it until you've tried it.
- It's not a thing.
237
00:09:51,963 --> 00:09:55,123
- I'm not knocking it. It's not a thing.
- Don't knock it until you've tried it.
238
00:10:02,130 --> 00:10:03,588
Here comes the one percent.
239
00:10:12,672 --> 00:10:14,297
That car belongs in a museum.
240
00:10:14,380 --> 00:10:16,630
What the fuck, Jared?
I said door-to-door.
241
00:10:16,713 --> 00:10:19,922
Museum of death,
'cause its smog is killing us all.
242
00:10:21,047 --> 00:10:23,130
- Fuck!
- You all right?
243
00:10:23,213 --> 00:10:25,838
They spend every minute together.
It's so weird.
244
00:10:25,922 --> 00:10:27,505
We spend every minute together.
245
00:10:27,588 --> 00:10:28,505
We are equals.
246
00:10:28,588 --> 00:10:30,963
Gigi just keeps Jared around
for when she needs a liver.
247
00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:33,356
- No, please don't get on my car.
- I'm fucking spent, Jared!
248
00:10:33,380 --> 00:10:35,314
- At least take the heels off.
- I'm fucking spent!
249
00:10:35,338 --> 00:10:37,731
- I just got it back from the shop.
- Okay, shh! I'm napping.
250
00:10:37,755 --> 00:10:41,547
Do you think it's true that his dad got
him a sex worker for his 14th birthday?
251
00:10:41,630 --> 00:10:44,047
It's too weird of a story to be made up.
252
00:10:44,130 --> 00:10:45,797
There's so many specifics.
253
00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:48,213
He sprained his ankle,
she had a hearing aid.
254
00:10:48,297 --> 00:10:49,422
What up, chicas?
255
00:10:49,505 --> 00:10:50,755
It's intolerable.
256
00:10:50,838 --> 00:10:51,958
You guys... you guys hungry?
257
00:10:52,005 --> 00:10:54,297
I got... I got some soup dumps.
258
00:10:54,380 --> 00:10:56,088
Keep it down out there!
259
00:10:56,172 --> 00:10:58,172
They're probably soggy now,
but they're great cold!
260
00:10:58,213 --> 00:10:59,231
- Good Lord.
- S'all right.
261
00:10:59,255 --> 00:11:01,439
I'm going to pee in your weird bathroom.
Watch my stuff.
262
00:11:01,463 --> 00:11:04,380
Until all of us can pee without genitals,
none of us can.
263
00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:07,005
These motherfuckers.
264
00:11:07,755 --> 00:11:08,755
"Your ugly" what?
265
00:11:09,547 --> 00:11:11,213
How did you graduate sixth grade?
266
00:11:11,297 --> 00:11:12,922
It's shocking to me.
267
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:15,172
So, okay, so, I win.
268
00:11:15,255 --> 00:11:17,380
- Marry the sex doll, okay?
- Right.
269
00:11:17,463 --> 00:11:19,189
- Fuck the soccer ball.
- Yep.
270
00:11:19,213 --> 00:11:20,547
And then, kill Molly.
271
00:11:20,630 --> 00:11:22,297
Dude, no!
272
00:11:22,380 --> 00:11:23,505
There's no other way, dude.
273
00:11:23,588 --> 00:11:25,380
Like, I can't fuck her,
you know, 'cause...
274
00:11:25,463 --> 00:11:27,505
when I'm scared, my dick can't get hard.
275
00:11:27,588 --> 00:11:29,755
And then, like, I can't marry her,
'cause, well,
276
00:11:29,838 --> 00:11:31,963
- I don't believe in the institution.
- Uh-huh.
277
00:11:32,047 --> 00:11:33,713
So I have to kill Molly.
278
00:11:33,797 --> 00:11:35,922
And I know it'll haunt me.
I'm a peaceful person.
279
00:11:36,005 --> 00:11:37,963
That's very true.
280
00:11:38,047 --> 00:11:40,047
Wait, are you guys talking
about Molly Davidson?
281
00:11:40,130 --> 00:11:40,963
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
282
00:11:41,047 --> 00:11:43,963
That girl is so weird.
She always acts like she's, like, 40.
283
00:11:44,047 --> 00:11:47,148
I wish she was fuckin' 40, man.
Women in their forties know themselves.
284
00:11:47,172 --> 00:11:50,047
Oh, she's cute,
you know, yeah, I give her that,
285
00:11:50,130 --> 00:11:53,463
but she'd probably make you quiz her
on her SAT analogies while you fuck her.
286
00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:57,005
Dude, no, her vagina is probably stuffed
with diplomas, how much do you wanna bet?
287
00:11:57,088 --> 00:11:59,047
That shit's like a filing cabinet
down there.
288
00:11:59,130 --> 00:12:01,838
Well, I've got no problem
with a filing cabinet.
289
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:04,880
I would make passionate sex
to Molly Davidson.
290
00:12:04,963 --> 00:12:06,005
Really?
291
00:12:06,088 --> 00:12:08,422
Yeah, I'd just put a bag
over her personality.
292
00:12:08,505 --> 00:12:10,172
- Yeah.
- That's it.
293
00:12:10,255 --> 00:12:13,463
Molly's like a butterface for personality,
a butter personality.
294
00:12:13,547 --> 00:12:15,255
Yeah!
295
00:12:16,338 --> 00:12:17,963
- It's so bad.
- Yeah.
296
00:12:18,047 --> 00:12:20,672
That's cool, man. What?
297
00:12:22,047 --> 00:12:23,047
Shit.
298
00:12:26,547 --> 00:12:27,547
Oh.
299
00:12:27,963 --> 00:12:30,130
Oh, please, do not stop on my account.
300
00:12:31,088 --> 00:12:34,463
Do you know what?
My vag is stuffed with diplomas.
301
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:37,505
Soon it's gonna be stuffed
with job offers,
302
00:12:37,588 --> 00:12:41,255
and glowing profiles,
and commendations from the governor.
303
00:12:41,338 --> 00:12:45,255
So, while you guys
were all studying AP hand jobs,
304
00:12:45,338 --> 00:12:47,505
I was kicking ass and busting curves.
305
00:12:47,588 --> 00:12:50,213
And I'm gonna continue to do that
at Yale next year.
306
00:12:50,297 --> 00:12:51,297
So...
307
00:12:52,088 --> 00:12:53,088
I like my choices,
308
00:12:53,130 --> 00:12:55,755
and wherever you three are next year,
I hope you do, too.
309
00:12:56,963 --> 00:12:58,088
I'm going to Yale, too.
310
00:13:01,172 --> 00:13:02,172
What?
311
00:13:02,213 --> 00:13:06,380
I'm incredible at hand jobs,
but I also got a 1560 on the SATs.
312
00:13:07,588 --> 00:13:08,672
No, you didn't.
313
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:10,005
I got in early.
314
00:13:10,088 --> 00:13:11,463
- To Yale?
- Uh-huh.
315
00:13:11,547 --> 00:13:12,713
- Mm-hm?
- Mm-hm.
316
00:13:12,797 --> 00:13:13,630
Mm-hm.
317
00:13:13,713 --> 00:13:16,088
Oh, um, Tanner,
where are you going to school?
318
00:13:16,672 --> 00:13:19,005
Uh, I'm... I'm playing soccer at Stanford.
319
00:13:19,088 --> 00:13:22,213
Stanford University?
What are you guys talking about? That's...
320
00:13:22,297 --> 00:13:25,005
- No, yes, Stanford.
- Mm-hm. Stanford University.
321
00:13:25,088 --> 00:13:27,130
Hey, I'm not going to college.
322
00:13:27,213 --> 00:13:29,297
I got recruited to go code for Google.
323
00:13:29,380 --> 00:13:31,130
I mean, it's not Apple,
324
00:13:31,213 --> 00:13:33,463
but the bennies are pretty tight, man,
325
00:13:33,547 --> 00:13:35,588
and it's mid six-figures,
so I'm not complainin'.
326
00:13:35,672 --> 00:13:37,392
- That's my boy.
- So proud of you. Amazing.
327
00:13:37,422 --> 00:13:39,713
You failed the seventh grade twice.
328
00:13:40,047 --> 00:13:41,047
Rule of threes.
329
00:13:43,672 --> 00:13:45,352
- You guys are serious?
- Mm-hm.
330
00:13:46,088 --> 00:13:49,547
Hey, um, I'm gonna pretend
like I don't know you next year.
331
00:13:50,005 --> 00:13:51,005
No offense.
332
00:13:51,797 --> 00:13:52,713
Hmm.
333
00:13:52,797 --> 00:13:54,880
This... this isn't possible.
334
00:13:54,963 --> 00:13:56,713
You guys don't even care about school.
335
00:13:57,963 --> 00:13:58,963
No.
336
00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:01,338
We just don't only care about school.
337
00:14:10,172 --> 00:14:11,255
Well, I'm... I'm done.
338
00:14:11,338 --> 00:14:13,314
After... After you. After you, man.
339
00:14:13,338 --> 00:14:14,338
Okay.
340
00:14:15,297 --> 00:14:17,297
Sorry, excuse me.
341
00:14:19,547 --> 00:14:24,255
You've worked harder
than everyone who's ever doubted you.
342
00:14:24,338 --> 00:14:27,422
You've worked harder.
343
00:14:27,505 --> 00:14:28,547
...doubted you.
344
00:14:37,672 --> 00:14:38,672
Hey.
345
00:14:38,922 --> 00:14:40,380
You okay?
346
00:14:40,463 --> 00:14:42,547
Nick, where are you going
to school next year?
347
00:14:42,630 --> 00:14:45,047
- I thought we weren't supposed to talk...
- Just tell me!
348
00:14:45,130 --> 00:14:46,797
Georgetown. Jesus.
349
00:14:48,422 --> 00:14:51,231
- Hope, where are you going next year?
- No, I couldn't be less interested
350
00:14:51,255 --> 00:14:53,380
in, like, whatever this is.
351
00:14:53,463 --> 00:14:55,797
Gigi, where the fuck
are you going to school next year?
352
00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,838
Don't judge me, it was my fifth choice.
353
00:14:58,213 --> 00:14:59,213
Harvard.
354
00:15:20,463 --> 00:15:22,547
Seniors rule!
355
00:16:15,755 --> 00:16:16,915
This is fucked!
356
00:16:17,213 --> 00:16:18,213
Okay.
357
00:16:18,630 --> 00:16:20,255
This is obviously not helping.
358
00:16:20,338 --> 00:16:24,213
We chose. We didn't party
because we wanted to focus on school
359
00:16:24,297 --> 00:16:25,797
and get into good colleges.
360
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:26,880
And it worked.
361
00:16:26,922 --> 00:16:29,088
But the irresponsible people who partied
362
00:16:29,172 --> 00:16:31,422
also got into those colleges,
they did both.
363
00:16:31,505 --> 00:16:32,338
So?
364
00:16:32,422 --> 00:16:33,713
So we messed up.
365
00:16:34,172 --> 00:16:35,922
We didn't have to choose. They did both.
366
00:16:36,005 --> 00:16:37,880
We are the only assholes who did one.
367
00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:40,880
Hey, we are not assholes, okay?
368
00:16:40,963 --> 00:16:41,838
Let's just...
369
00:16:41,922 --> 00:16:44,047
Come sit down, we'll cut the cake,
370
00:16:44,130 --> 00:16:45,297
look at the memory box,
371
00:16:45,380 --> 00:16:48,672
- celebrate the end...
- This is not a time to celebrate.
372
00:16:49,380 --> 00:16:50,838
We have to go to a party tonight.
373
00:16:51,547 --> 00:16:53,380
- What?
- Let's go to Nick's party.
374
00:16:53,463 --> 00:16:55,172
No... Are you kidding? No. No way.
375
00:16:55,255 --> 00:16:57,797
Amy, we only have one night left
376
00:16:57,880 --> 00:16:59,713
to have studied and partied
in high school.
377
00:16:59,797 --> 00:17:02,588
Otherwise, we're just gonna be the girls
that missed out.
378
00:17:02,672 --> 00:17:03,713
We haven't done anything.
379
00:17:03,797 --> 00:17:05,380
We haven't broken any rules.
380
00:17:05,463 --> 00:17:08,255
Okay, we've broken a lot of rules.
381
00:17:08,338 --> 00:17:09,922
One, we have fake IDs.
382
00:17:10,005 --> 00:17:12,963
Fake college IDs,
so we can get into their 24-hour library.
383
00:17:13,047 --> 00:17:15,880
Name one person whose life
was so much better
384
00:17:15,963 --> 00:17:17,923
- because they broke a couple of rules.
- Picasso.
385
00:17:17,963 --> 00:17:20,422
Yes, he broke art rules.
Name a person who broke a real one.
386
00:17:20,505 --> 00:17:21,713
- Rosa Parks.
- Name another.
387
00:17:21,797 --> 00:17:23,547
- Susan B. Anthony.
- Goddamn it.
388
00:17:23,630 --> 00:17:26,630
Amy, I'm so serious.
They think that we're robots.
389
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:30,047
They think all we care about is taking
a million APs, and getting into Yale,
390
00:17:30,130 --> 00:17:31,963
and editing Law Review at Georgetown,
391
00:17:32,047 --> 00:17:34,527
and clerking for a federal judge
between junior and senior year
392
00:17:34,588 --> 00:17:37,505
before eventually becoming
the youngest justice
393
00:17:37,588 --> 00:17:41,463
ever nominated
to the Supreme Court of the United States.
394
00:17:44,463 --> 00:17:45,463
In my case.
395
00:17:46,338 --> 00:17:47,338
You get the point.
396
00:17:47,755 --> 00:17:50,547
- Nobody knows that we are fun.
- We know.
397
00:17:50,630 --> 00:17:51,505
They need to know.
398
00:17:51,588 --> 00:17:52,422
Who's they?
399
00:17:52,505 --> 00:17:54,422
We are not one-dimensional.
400
00:17:54,505 --> 00:17:56,505
We are smart and fun.
401
00:17:57,547 --> 00:17:58,880
We have to do this.
402
00:17:58,963 --> 00:18:00,005
This is crazy.
403
00:18:00,088 --> 00:18:02,380
We graduate tomorrow.
404
00:18:02,463 --> 00:18:03,922
What if we get in trouble?
405
00:18:04,005 --> 00:18:06,005
You know that we are too smart for that.
406
00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:07,963
Plus, Ryan is gonna be there.
407
00:18:08,047 --> 00:18:11,505
She wanted you to come.
You're finally gonna make your moves.
408
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:13,255
No, she's not...
409
00:18:13,338 --> 00:18:15,731
You've been out for two years
and you've never kissed a girl.
410
00:18:15,755 --> 00:18:17,547
I want you to experience this.
411
00:18:18,005 --> 00:18:20,547
What will I be doing during that time,
you might ask?
412
00:18:20,630 --> 00:18:23,755
I'm going to experience
a seminal fun anecdote,
413
00:18:24,422 --> 00:18:26,922
and we are gonna change
our stories forever.
414
00:18:30,505 --> 00:18:32,145
We were gonna watch that Ken Burns thing.
415
00:18:32,172 --> 00:18:33,880
The Dust Bowl can wait, bitch!
416
00:18:34,255 --> 00:18:36,880
What took them four years,
we are doing in one night!
417
00:18:38,047 --> 00:18:39,255
Oh, Jesus!
418
00:18:49,755 --> 00:18:50,963
- No!
- No!
419
00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:52,338
- No. Not acceptable.
- Not okay.
420
00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:53,902
Who allowed you to be this beautiful?
421
00:18:53,963 --> 00:18:58,172
- Who allowed you to be this beautiful?
- Who allowed you to take my breath away?
422
00:18:58,255 --> 00:19:00,231
- Call the paramedics, call the police.
- Who... No.
423
00:19:00,255 --> 00:19:02,815
- 'Cause there has been an emergency.
- I can't look right at it.
424
00:19:04,255 --> 00:19:05,255
Not today!
425
00:19:06,255 --> 00:19:07,547
Grip escape move!
426
00:19:09,297 --> 00:19:11,047
Oh. Work.
427
00:19:11,130 --> 00:19:12,505
Get it? Tushy?
428
00:19:12,588 --> 00:19:13,672
Hand sanitizer.
429
00:19:13,755 --> 00:19:14,755
ChapStick.
430
00:19:14,838 --> 00:19:15,963
College IDs.
431
00:19:16,047 --> 00:19:19,172
Now, mace. Listen, it is very important
that you keep the safety...
432
00:19:19,255 --> 00:19:20,422
Oh!
433
00:19:20,505 --> 00:19:22,047
- Ah! Amy!
- The safety's not on!
434
00:19:22,130 --> 00:19:23,588
Don't touch your eyes!
435
00:19:23,672 --> 00:19:25,630
You have the same parts she does.
436
00:19:25,713 --> 00:19:28,463
You just take what you do to yourself,
flip it upside down.
437
00:19:28,547 --> 00:19:30,338
Well, I don't... I don't really...
438
00:19:30,422 --> 00:19:32,630
Just a down, but a flip.
439
00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:34,130
- I don't...
- A down flip.
440
00:19:34,213 --> 00:19:36,547
Well... what if I don't use my hands?
441
00:19:36,630 --> 00:19:39,255
You can make yourself come
using only your mind?
442
00:19:39,338 --> 00:19:41,255
- No.
- That's the one thing my mind can't do.
443
00:19:41,338 --> 00:19:44,797
No! Well, I use just... other stuff.
444
00:19:45,963 --> 00:19:47,172
- A book?
- No.
445
00:19:47,255 --> 00:19:49,338
Very Freudian,
but I'd worry about paper cuts.
446
00:19:49,422 --> 00:19:51,505
No. Can we just stop talking about this?
447
00:19:51,588 --> 00:19:54,047
- That little elephant?
- No! Stop!
448
00:19:54,130 --> 00:19:55,672
That weird crochet pig?
449
00:19:55,755 --> 00:19:57,314
My grandma gave me that
before she died!
450
00:19:57,338 --> 00:19:59,058
If you don't tell me what it is,
you know...
451
00:19:59,088 --> 00:20:01,005
It's the panda! It's the panda, okay?
452
00:20:01,088 --> 00:20:03,255
The panda. Whatever. Just...
453
00:20:04,338 --> 00:20:05,838
Can we just stop talking about this?
454
00:20:05,922 --> 00:20:08,338
Please, for the love of all things.
455
00:20:08,672 --> 00:20:09,712
Quick question.
456
00:20:10,338 --> 00:20:11,672
Just a quick Q.
457
00:20:11,755 --> 00:20:13,213
What happened to her eye?
458
00:20:14,922 --> 00:20:17,255
That fell off way before
anything happened between us.
459
00:20:17,338 --> 00:20:19,505
- Does she talk dirty to you?
- Mm-mm.
460
00:20:20,172 --> 00:20:22,672
- Tell you about how she's endangered?
- No!
461
00:20:23,380 --> 00:20:25,380
- Stop!
- Do pandas roar?
462
00:20:25,463 --> 00:20:28,213
- Stop!
- You sneaky little bitch.
463
00:20:28,297 --> 00:20:30,130
I can't believe you didn't tell me
464
00:20:30,213 --> 00:20:32,755
that you have been mounting
that tragic panda
465
00:20:32,838 --> 00:20:34,463
every single night!
466
00:20:34,547 --> 00:20:36,398
- Yeah.
- This is... Honestly, it's exhilarating.
467
00:20:36,422 --> 00:20:38,255
I thought I knew everything about you.
468
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:41,588
I think it's healthy for a relationship
to have secrets, and now we have one.
469
00:20:42,172 --> 00:20:44,255
Do I have a secret for you? Okay, yes.
470
00:20:44,338 --> 00:20:45,338
- Uh-huh.
- Yeah.
471
00:20:45,588 --> 00:20:47,880
- I once tried to masturbate...
- Mm.
472
00:20:48,213 --> 00:20:50,213
with an electric toothbrush.
473
00:20:51,005 --> 00:20:53,172
But I got a horrible UTI.
474
00:20:53,755 --> 00:20:54,672
Horrible.
475
00:20:54,755 --> 00:20:55,755
Like...
476
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:57,255
horrible.
477
00:20:57,547 --> 00:21:01,963
I wish that would have been a secret,
but you've mentioned it many, many times.
478
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:05,463
Hey. Hey!
479
00:21:06,005 --> 00:21:07,463
I need you to do the talking.
480
00:21:07,963 --> 00:21:10,172
Why don't you just tell them
we're going to a party?
481
00:21:10,380 --> 00:21:13,255
Because they'll ask too many questions.
They'll try to call Nick's aunt.
482
00:21:13,338 --> 00:21:15,838
I've never lied to my parents before.
483
00:21:15,922 --> 00:21:18,338
You know when I lie,
I just add too many details.
484
00:21:18,838 --> 00:21:22,630
Just make up a story, but don't say
we're having a date night or anything.
485
00:21:22,713 --> 00:21:24,963
Why? It's funny
your parents think we're boning.
486
00:21:25,047 --> 00:21:26,255
No, it's not,
487
00:21:26,338 --> 00:21:29,172
because you're not the one
who has to deal with their creepy smiles
488
00:21:29,255 --> 00:21:31,213
when I tell them
I'm meeting you at the library,
489
00:21:31,297 --> 00:21:33,630
when I'm actually
meeting you at the library.
490
00:21:33,713 --> 00:21:36,422
Honestly, it's surprising
that Doug and Charmaine are supportive,
491
00:21:36,505 --> 00:21:37,963
considering their whole Jesus thing.
492
00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:38,922
It's nice.
493
00:21:39,005 --> 00:21:40,672
- Charmaine, get to the safe room.
- Hey!
494
00:21:40,755 --> 00:21:42,356
- We're bein' robbed by supermodels.
- Hi!
495
00:21:42,380 --> 00:21:44,713
Aw, you girls look fabulous.
496
00:21:44,797 --> 00:21:46,797
- Oh...
- And smart, and also brave.
497
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:48,088
- Thank you.
- Yeah, thanks.
498
00:21:48,172 --> 00:21:49,212
- Aww!
- Are you guys cold?
499
00:21:49,255 --> 00:21:50,297
- Oh, no.
- A little nippy.
500
00:21:50,380 --> 00:21:52,547
I'll start a fire,
or I'll turn up the heat.
501
00:21:52,630 --> 00:21:54,755
Just get the jackets off.
Dinner's about ready.
502
00:21:54,838 --> 00:21:56,356
- Oh, you've gotta taste this.
- Well...
503
00:21:56,380 --> 00:21:58,713
- Yeah.
- I'm calling it "diplo-meatball."
504
00:21:59,963 --> 00:22:01,043
- Sure.
- Don't engage them.
505
00:22:01,088 --> 00:22:02,672
Oh, right, right, okay. Um...
506
00:22:02,755 --> 00:22:04,255
Char-Char, Dougsicles,
507
00:22:04,797 --> 00:22:08,297
would it be okay
if Amy stayed over at my house tonight?
508
00:22:11,255 --> 00:22:14,338
- The... the night before graduation?
- Yeah.
509
00:22:14,422 --> 00:22:16,922
You know, my mom can drive us
to the ceremony.
510
00:22:17,005 --> 00:22:20,880
We just want as much time together
as we can before she leaves for Africa.
511
00:22:21,338 --> 00:22:22,338
We made, uh...
512
00:22:23,255 --> 00:22:24,380
mushroom cap and gowns.
513
00:22:24,463 --> 00:22:27,255
- Yeah...
- We made special names for all this stuff.
514
00:22:27,338 --> 00:22:29,838
- Great deal of care was taken.
- Well...
515
00:22:29,922 --> 00:22:31,588
Every... I mean, look, uh...
516
00:22:32,047 --> 00:22:33,922
Chips and sal-so long, high school.
517
00:22:34,005 --> 00:22:35,685
You know, cheese and...
518
00:22:35,755 --> 00:22:39,797
sala-me being your dad
was the greatest honor of my life.
519
00:22:40,255 --> 00:22:41,838
You know, e-everything has a name.
520
00:22:41,922 --> 00:22:44,505
- O-love my baby girl. That's olives.
- Yeah.
521
00:22:44,588 --> 00:22:46,523
- Doug.
- Do you know what? We get it.
522
00:22:46,547 --> 00:22:47,880
- But...
- We get it.
523
00:22:48,505 --> 00:22:50,023
- Yes, yes, yes.
- We understand, okay?
524
00:22:50,047 --> 00:22:51,880
- What you two have...
- We do. I'm sorry.
525
00:22:51,963 --> 00:22:55,463
- What they have is very, very special.
- I'm sorry.
526
00:22:55,547 --> 00:22:56,713
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
527
00:22:56,797 --> 00:22:58,505
Oh! It really is.
528
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:02,005
It is. You know, they say
you never forget your first...
529
00:23:02,088 --> 00:23:03,088
Friend.
530
00:23:03,630 --> 00:23:05,922
- Special friend.
- Normal friend.
531
00:23:06,005 --> 00:23:08,422
- Yeah, my special friend.
- Mm. Yeah.
532
00:23:08,505 --> 00:23:11,255
I'm just so thankful
we get to spend the whole night together
533
00:23:11,338 --> 00:23:13,463
to really show each other
534
00:23:13,547 --> 00:23:16,047
- how much we care about each other.
- Ah. Oh!
535
00:23:16,130 --> 00:23:17,755
- That's great.
- Mmm, my girl.
536
00:23:17,838 --> 00:23:20,172
We'll probably just do
a Korean face mask.
537
00:23:20,255 --> 00:23:22,047
Well, I don't need to know all the words.
538
00:23:23,088 --> 00:23:24,547
- Okay.
- Go, go, go!
539
00:23:30,005 --> 00:23:31,547
Whoo-hoo! That's it!
540
00:23:31,630 --> 00:23:32,672
Oh, my God!
541
00:23:32,755 --> 00:23:35,088
Nick's auntie's house
is about to be popping.
542
00:23:35,172 --> 00:23:37,064
- Big ass party.
- Aunt Viv. Aunt Viv, I love you.
543
00:23:37,088 --> 00:23:39,172
Ten-four. That's for the boy.
544
00:23:39,755 --> 00:23:41,005
Whoop! Whoop!
545
00:23:41,088 --> 00:23:42,588
Ferris isn't trying to fall in love
546
00:23:42,672 --> 00:23:43,672
- on his day off.
- He is.
547
00:23:46,255 --> 00:23:48,172
- Oh, fuck!
- God.
548
00:23:48,547 --> 00:23:50,107
- Tanner ate a ghost pepper.
- Oh, my...
549
00:23:50,422 --> 00:23:52,380
He needs milk. Someone get him milk.
550
00:23:52,463 --> 00:23:55,088
- That's... that's not gonna help.
- Oh, fuck!
551
00:23:55,172 --> 00:23:57,172
- Oh, my...
- Oh!
552
00:23:57,255 --> 00:24:00,005
Oh, that's too much milk.
He.. he just had too much milk.
553
00:24:00,255 --> 00:24:03,255
Fuck! No one is answering.
554
00:24:03,505 --> 00:24:06,380
Somebody give me the address!
555
00:24:06,463 --> 00:24:09,130
We've never hung out
with any of these people
556
00:24:09,213 --> 00:24:11,005
outside of academic activities.
557
00:24:11,088 --> 00:24:13,755
They probably think we're calling
about school stuff.
558
00:24:14,338 --> 00:24:15,172
You're right.
559
00:24:15,255 --> 00:24:16,505
Can we just call a Lyft?
560
00:24:16,797 --> 00:24:18,713
We still don't know where we're going.
561
00:24:19,380 --> 00:24:22,422
Do you know a Lyft driver
that knows where Nick's aunt lives?
562
00:24:23,547 --> 00:24:24,547
I think I do.
563
00:24:27,088 --> 00:24:28,088
Who are you calling?
564
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:30,005
Don't worry about it, chica.
565
00:24:30,588 --> 00:24:31,588
What?
566
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:39,880
Jesus Christ.
567
00:24:39,922 --> 00:24:41,630
All aboard the SS Lit!
568
00:24:43,297 --> 00:24:44,297
As fuck!
569
00:24:45,297 --> 00:24:46,713
The SS Lit As Fuck.
570
00:24:47,213 --> 00:24:48,963
- No.
- I'm so glad you called.
571
00:24:49,047 --> 00:24:51,588
Sorry it took so long. Traffic was nerts.
572
00:24:52,255 --> 00:24:53,255
I'll co... I'll come...
573
00:24:53,338 --> 00:24:55,755
It's like Guy Fieri's wet dream.
574
00:24:55,838 --> 00:24:57,255
It's a means to an end.
575
00:24:59,047 --> 00:25:01,047
May I offer you the front,
mademoiselle?
576
00:25:01,130 --> 00:25:03,255
No? Goin' for the back? That's cool.
577
00:25:03,338 --> 00:25:05,738
Back's great too. Great air flow
back there. Get on in there.
578
00:25:05,797 --> 00:25:08,297
Okay. Time for some nights
we'll never remember
579
00:25:08,380 --> 00:25:10,088
with friends we'll never forget, huh?
580
00:25:10,172 --> 00:25:11,852
Jared, you know where the party is, right?
581
00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:13,005
Absofruitly, ladies.
582
00:25:13,088 --> 00:25:16,297
We are headed to the biggest, coolest
grad night party in town.
583
00:25:16,380 --> 00:25:17,797
Can I get a what-what?
584
00:25:18,297 --> 00:25:19,338
Jesus Christ.
585
00:25:19,422 --> 00:25:22,505
No? That's okay. Maybe later.
It's over on the west side, so...
586
00:25:22,963 --> 00:25:24,088
Get some tunes goin'.
587
00:25:24,172 --> 00:25:27,880
Random House Audio
presents Lean In... Women, Work
588
00:25:27,963 --> 00:25:29,172
- and the Will to Lead.- Okay.
589
00:25:29,463 --> 00:25:31,814
- By Sheryl Sandberg with Nell Scovell.
- That's embarrassing.
590
00:25:31,838 --> 00:25:35,047
I have this thing where I like to hear
the words of powerful women before I party
591
00:25:35,130 --> 00:25:38,005
to remind myself of the respect and awe
you ladies deserve.
592
00:25:38,088 --> 00:25:40,172
Internalizing the revolution.
593
00:25:40,463 --> 00:25:42,463
I got pregnant with my first child
in the summer...
594
00:25:42,547 --> 00:25:45,467
I'll get somethin' peppy going.
We'll get this party started, huh?
595
00:25:56,297 --> 00:25:57,547
Sorry about that.
596
00:25:57,630 --> 00:25:59,856
Jared, it's fine.
Isn't she your girlfriend or something?
597
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,422
What? No, she's...
598
00:26:02,547 --> 00:26:05,005
No girlfriend for me. I can't pick faves.
599
00:26:05,088 --> 00:26:08,130
Too many ladies wanna lock this down,
and they don't have the code.
600
00:26:08,213 --> 00:26:09,255
Two-eight-three-one.
601
00:26:09,463 --> 00:26:11,547
Well, that's my PIN number.
602
00:26:11,630 --> 00:26:12,505
Uh... but...
603
00:26:12,588 --> 00:26:14,963
Sorry, I'll just... What's up, Gig?
604
00:26:15,047 --> 00:26:16,880
Jared, where the fuck did you go?
605
00:26:16,963 --> 00:26:19,463
I left my tin of special things
in your car and I need it!
606
00:26:19,547 --> 00:26:21,213
Okay, all right. Jeez, Louise!
607
00:26:21,797 --> 00:26:25,255
Do I wanna know
what a tin of special things is?
608
00:26:28,547 --> 00:26:30,463
Oh, my God. This is drugs.
609
00:26:31,005 --> 00:26:32,297
- What?
- What?
610
00:26:32,380 --> 00:26:36,130
Hey, Jare.
Jared, we're just gonna hop out here.
611
00:26:36,213 --> 00:26:37,588
- Wait, what? Why?
- No.
612
00:26:37,672 --> 00:26:39,630
- She's kidding.
- No, I'm not.
613
00:26:39,713 --> 00:26:41,422
Our... Our friend, she just texted us.
614
00:26:41,505 --> 00:26:44,047
And she said she... she...
she hit a possum with her car.
615
00:26:44,130 --> 00:26:46,505
- No! You know what kind of possum?
- Yeah. It's bad.
616
00:26:46,588 --> 00:26:49,713
But the possum didn't die.
Its adrenaline and... and rage
617
00:26:49,797 --> 00:26:52,731
- just made it start chasing her...
- We are not hopping off. Keep driving.
618
00:26:52,755 --> 00:26:55,814
What about the po... Is she gonna be okay?
Wanna text her and see if she's okay?
619
00:26:55,838 --> 00:26:58,038
Enough about the possum!
Jared, you took Spanish, right?
620
00:26:58,088 --> 00:26:59,713
Ah, sí, sí, mi bonita mujer.
621
00:27:08,797 --> 00:27:09,837
I'm not gettin' any of it.
622
00:27:18,380 --> 00:27:19,380
Whoo!
623
00:27:19,505 --> 00:27:21,713
Came in a little hot there. That's my bad.
624
00:27:21,797 --> 00:27:24,213
- But we are here.
- What do we do? What do we do?
625
00:27:24,297 --> 00:27:26,713
- Don't move, don't inhale.
- All right.
626
00:27:28,130 --> 00:27:29,172
Oh, shit.
627
00:27:29,255 --> 00:27:31,672
There are drugs in my orifices.
628
00:27:31,755 --> 00:27:32,588
Drugs.
629
00:27:32,672 --> 00:27:33,672
Oh, no, that's...
630
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:35,713
It's not drugs.
That's just Gigi's vitamins.
631
00:27:37,088 --> 00:27:37,922
Her... her what?
632
00:27:38,005 --> 00:27:41,463
Yeah, you know, like vitamin D, B-12. Gigi
likes to crush them up and snort them.
633
00:27:41,547 --> 00:27:44,308
She says they work better that way.
We'll get you cleaned up on board.
634
00:27:45,130 --> 00:27:46,963
What? What do you mean, "on board"?
635
00:27:47,380 --> 00:27:50,297
Okay, now, you guys said
you wanted to go to the best party.
636
00:27:50,380 --> 00:27:53,338
So... I brought you to the best party.
637
00:27:53,422 --> 00:27:54,505
Which is my party!
638
00:27:55,088 --> 00:27:56,713
Prepare to get bashed!
639
00:27:58,297 --> 00:27:59,797
Not... Not in, like, a violent way.
640
00:27:59,880 --> 00:28:02,463
Completely consensual bashing.
I don't know if that was clear.
641
00:28:02,547 --> 00:28:04,067
"Prepared to get consensually bashed."
642
00:28:04,130 --> 00:28:05,838
I'll have 'em change it.
What do you think?
643
00:28:05,922 --> 00:28:07,797
You're serious, Jared? This is your party?
644
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:10,505
You don't wanna go
to Nick's lame house party. You don't.
645
00:28:10,588 --> 00:28:12,213
A boat is international waters, right?
646
00:28:12,297 --> 00:28:14,880
Maritime law.
Just come check it out for a little bit.
647
00:28:14,963 --> 00:28:16,005
It's sick.
648
00:28:16,088 --> 00:28:18,922
The catering company said it's
the coolest party they've ever been to.
649
00:28:19,005 --> 00:28:20,422
And I'll tell you somethin'.
650
00:28:21,255 --> 00:28:23,172
They worked Sasha Obama's sweet 16.
651
00:28:24,630 --> 00:28:26,630
- Up to you.
- What are we thinking?
652
00:28:27,213 --> 00:28:29,213
- We still don't have Nick's address.
- Mm.
653
00:28:29,547 --> 00:28:31,797
Someone on board might know where it is.
654
00:28:32,380 --> 00:28:35,130
And I'd like to meet someone
who met Sasha.
655
00:28:35,672 --> 00:28:37,672
Yeah, respect for Sasha. Okay.
656
00:28:37,755 --> 00:28:38,755
- Yeah?
- Mm-hm.
657
00:28:38,838 --> 00:28:39,838
Let's go.
658
00:28:40,297 --> 00:28:41,297
You guys excited?
659
00:28:45,380 --> 00:28:46,422
Welcome to the club!
660
00:28:46,505 --> 00:28:47,755
Oh, no.
661
00:28:47,838 --> 00:28:49,880
Cool, huh? We're on a boat.
What's up with that?
662
00:28:50,172 --> 00:28:51,588
There is not a soul here, Ames.
663
00:28:51,672 --> 00:28:52,547
Ice tiger.
664
00:28:52,630 --> 00:28:54,505
This is insane. You made gift bags?
665
00:28:55,297 --> 00:28:57,047
There is an iPad in here.
666
00:28:57,130 --> 00:29:00,713
Preloaded with photos of all of our best
high school memories, class of 2019.
667
00:29:00,797 --> 00:29:02,172
Say what? Champagne?
668
00:29:02,255 --> 00:29:04,505
There's a masseuse in the back,
male or female.
669
00:29:04,588 --> 00:29:06,630
Gambling behind the bar. Do you guys tan?
670
00:29:08,005 --> 00:29:09,797
I'm so happy you guys are here.
671
00:29:11,130 --> 00:29:13,505
- I knew you guys partied. Didn't I?
- You did, she said it.
672
00:29:13,588 --> 00:29:15,255
I told him. "Those guys seem quiet,
673
00:29:15,338 --> 00:29:18,058
but they're probably spending
every weekend at, like, a sex dungeon."
674
00:29:18,130 --> 00:29:20,755
- No.
- Here, try one of these strawberries.
675
00:29:20,838 --> 00:29:21,838
Okay.
676
00:29:22,130 --> 00:29:23,047
No.
677
00:29:23,130 --> 00:29:24,963
- No, no, no...
- Mmm...
678
00:29:25,047 --> 00:29:27,047
Mmm...
679
00:29:27,797 --> 00:29:29,797
- Ah.
- Mm. Mm-hmm.
680
00:29:30,922 --> 00:29:32,505
- Not bad.
- That's pretty good.
681
00:29:32,588 --> 00:29:33,588
Wait.
682
00:29:37,588 --> 00:29:40,838
Mmm...
683
00:29:40,922 --> 00:29:42,755
Oh, God, you taste like my vitamins.
684
00:29:42,838 --> 00:29:44,797
- Uh...
- I think I'm in love with you.
685
00:29:44,880 --> 00:29:45,922
I don't think you are.
686
00:29:46,005 --> 00:29:47,672
- You're coming with me.
- What?
687
00:29:47,755 --> 00:29:49,963
Dance party upstairs!
688
00:29:50,047 --> 00:29:51,630
Yeah! Whoo!
689
00:29:51,713 --> 00:29:53,130
- No, wait!
- Yes, yes, yes!
690
00:29:53,213 --> 00:29:55,463
Amy? Amy? Amy? Ame, we're not...
691
00:29:55,547 --> 00:29:58,005
Look what I found... with your name on it.
692
00:29:58,088 --> 00:29:59,213
Come on, too cool.
693
00:29:59,297 --> 00:30:01,047
How do you feel, huh? You look stoked.
694
00:30:01,130 --> 00:30:02,755
- Chicken spring roll?
- No, thank you.
695
00:30:03,922 --> 00:30:05,005
Oh, you, uh...
696
00:30:05,630 --> 00:30:06,713
Oh!
697
00:30:06,797 --> 00:30:07,797
You want?
698
00:30:08,172 --> 00:30:09,588
Oh, no thank you.
699
00:30:09,672 --> 00:30:11,088
Not a drug person.
700
00:30:11,172 --> 00:30:13,922
Not even pot?
I feel like it could help you relax.
701
00:30:14,088 --> 00:30:16,463
- Nope. Doesn't work for me.
- Huh.
702
00:30:16,547 --> 00:30:18,547
DJ Rod!
703
00:30:18,630 --> 00:30:20,797
What the fuck?
704
00:30:22,588 --> 00:30:24,463
Jared... stop.
705
00:30:25,047 --> 00:30:26,963
Jared, wrap...
706
00:30:27,047 --> 00:30:29,588
Take the helmet off! Take the helmet off!
707
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,630
This isn't working.
You can't buy people's affection.
708
00:30:36,797 --> 00:30:38,130
Um...
709
00:30:40,380 --> 00:30:43,547
No, I'm pretty sure you can.
710
00:30:43,630 --> 00:30:46,713
'Cause I've seen it a lot.
My parents did it.
711
00:30:47,630 --> 00:30:49,870
- Their parents did it.
- Just stop trying so hard, okay?
712
00:30:49,922 --> 00:30:51,380
People sense it, it turns them off.
713
00:30:51,463 --> 00:30:52,547
But you try hard.
714
00:30:53,755 --> 00:30:56,036
You try hard and everything.
That's what I like about you.
715
00:30:58,172 --> 00:31:00,088
- I didn't mean it like...
- I'm just gonna...
716
00:31:00,172 --> 00:31:01,880
- I meant more like...
- I'm gonna go.
717
00:31:01,963 --> 00:31:04,172
- Lamb meatball?
- Motherfucker! You're everywhere!
718
00:31:04,255 --> 00:31:08,088
One time I ate a legal pot brownie
when Model UN went to Amsterdam.
719
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:11,000
And as soon as I got high,
I just cried about the fact
720
00:31:11,047 --> 00:31:13,130
that one day my mom will die, so...
721
00:31:13,213 --> 00:31:15,172
- I had the exact same thing.
- Really?
722
00:31:15,255 --> 00:31:17,922
I lost my virginity
in what I thought was a park, but...
723
00:31:18,005 --> 00:31:21,255
it turned out to be a graveyard, and now
the ghost spirits live inside my eggs
724
00:31:21,338 --> 00:31:22,630
waiting to be reborn.
725
00:31:22,713 --> 00:31:23,797
That's not at all the same.
726
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:25,338
I always felt like we were similar.
727
00:31:25,422 --> 00:31:26,648
- God, I'm gonna miss you.
- Oof.
728
00:31:26,672 --> 00:31:28,005
Hey. You can't smoke up here.
729
00:31:28,088 --> 00:31:29,380
- Oh...
- What'd you say to her?
730
00:31:29,463 --> 00:31:31,547
- I said it to you, you can't smoke.
- Um...
731
00:31:31,630 --> 00:31:33,838
You do not speak to her that way.
732
00:31:33,922 --> 00:31:35,755
Is... Is the her me? 'Cause I'm fine.
733
00:31:35,838 --> 00:31:38,088
That is my best friend
in the fucking world!
734
00:31:38,172 --> 00:31:41,130
- We're not, she's not...
- We'll fucking fight you to the death!
735
00:31:41,213 --> 00:31:42,338
Oh!
736
00:31:42,422 --> 00:31:43,755
Okay, I'm calling security.
737
00:31:43,838 --> 00:31:47,130
- Amy, we need to get the fuck outta here...
- Oh, my God!
738
00:31:47,213 --> 00:31:49,797
- Light 'em up, Luanne! It's go time!
- Um...
739
00:31:50,422 --> 00:31:53,047
There's only one thing left to do. Jump.
740
00:31:53,130 --> 00:31:55,088
- No! Off the boat?
- Wait, what? No! No!
741
00:31:55,172 --> 00:31:56,212
- No, seriously...
- You...
742
00:31:56,672 --> 00:31:59,213
- What are you guys doin' up here?
- Swan dive into the future!
743
00:31:59,297 --> 00:32:00,547
Grip escape move!
744
00:32:00,630 --> 00:32:02,255
No, no, no!
745
00:32:02,338 --> 00:32:04,505
Gege? Gege?
746
00:32:04,588 --> 00:32:05,963
- Ooh!
- Holy fuck!
747
00:32:06,047 --> 00:32:07,255
Gege, are you okay?
748
00:32:07,338 --> 00:32:09,630
- She's okay. Bail, bail, bail, bail!
- Just bail.
749
00:32:14,047 --> 00:32:15,047
Jesus!
750
00:32:16,463 --> 00:32:17,672
Oh, my God!
751
00:32:17,755 --> 00:32:19,797
I am so sweaty!
752
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,672
Oh, my God!
753
00:32:21,963 --> 00:32:24,163
We need to figure something out
before we get to Nick's.
754
00:32:24,713 --> 00:32:26,672
- You still want to go to Nick's?
- You don't?
755
00:32:27,130 --> 00:32:29,088
Well, dude, we went to a party.
756
00:32:29,547 --> 00:32:30,838
We did it. Let's go home.
757
00:32:34,505 --> 00:32:36,463
- Amy...
- Don't do your lecture voice.
758
00:32:36,547 --> 00:32:38,338
That was not a party.
759
00:32:38,422 --> 00:32:40,255
Well, it definitely was a party.
760
00:32:40,338 --> 00:32:41,922
That was a detour.
761
00:32:42,005 --> 00:32:44,588
We are A-plus people,
762
00:32:44,672 --> 00:32:46,755
and we are going to an A-plus party.
763
00:32:46,838 --> 00:32:47,838
Like this.
764
00:32:52,838 --> 00:32:54,380
Oh, my God, Alan responded.
765
00:32:54,463 --> 00:32:56,713
We have the address!
Okay, I'm calling a Lyft.
766
00:32:57,047 --> 00:32:58,463
Oh, my score is...
767
00:32:58,880 --> 00:32:59,797
My score is very low.
768
00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:02,064
I'm much too abrasive with the drivers.
You should call.
769
00:33:02,088 --> 00:33:03,088
I'm gonna go home.
770
00:33:03,213 --> 00:33:06,547
But if you wanna go to Nick's,
you should really go. Seriously, go.
771
00:33:08,255 --> 00:33:09,255
Malala.
772
00:33:12,797 --> 00:33:13,797
Whoa.
773
00:33:14,213 --> 00:33:16,338
- I'm calling Malala.
- Wow.
774
00:33:16,422 --> 00:33:19,630
You know you only get,
like, one Malala a year?
775
00:33:19,713 --> 00:33:20,922
Yeah, I'm calling it.
776
00:33:21,422 --> 00:33:24,505
Full support, no questions asked,
you are coming with me.
777
00:33:24,588 --> 00:33:25,588
Hmm.
778
00:33:28,672 --> 00:33:29,672
Malala.
779
00:33:30,505 --> 00:33:31,505
All right.
780
00:33:32,672 --> 00:33:33,672
Malala.
781
00:33:36,088 --> 00:33:37,172
Oh!
782
00:33:37,255 --> 00:33:38,547
Oh!
783
00:33:39,422 --> 00:33:42,130
Um... okay. Jordan?
784
00:33:42,213 --> 00:33:43,755
Yeah, and you're Am...
785
00:33:46,797 --> 00:33:48,422
Shit.
786
00:33:56,255 --> 00:33:57,255
You know, I-I, um...
787
00:33:57,338 --> 00:34:00,588
this job's a good way to supplement
the, uh... the old income.
788
00:34:01,130 --> 00:34:03,255
You know, teachers' salaries today
and all, so...
789
00:34:03,338 --> 00:34:05,380
- It's terrible.
- Yeah, it's a disgrace.
790
00:34:05,463 --> 00:34:07,630
Meet new people
and see new parts of the city,
791
00:34:07,713 --> 00:34:08,922
and run into old friends.
792
00:34:10,172 --> 00:34:12,588
- Friends?
- Plus, I'm writin' a book now.
793
00:34:12,672 --> 00:34:13,505
Oh.
794
00:34:13,588 --> 00:34:15,398
- Yeah, yeah. I'm not just a principal.
- Cool.
795
00:34:15,422 --> 00:34:19,672
Nothing more exciting or daunting
than the blank page, you know?
796
00:34:19,755 --> 00:34:21,880
One book I'm thinkin' about doin'
is a book of quotes.
797
00:34:21,963 --> 00:34:25,588
Nothing more daunting or exciting
than the blank page.
798
00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:28,922
But, yeah, that's one idea. I'm thinkin'
about doin' a detective novel.
799
00:34:29,005 --> 00:34:30,963
Actually, you know what?
You two will love...
800
00:34:31,213 --> 00:34:34,213
Amy, you'll love this.
It's a, uh... a female detective.
801
00:34:34,297 --> 00:34:35,630
- Oh, really?
- A lady detective.
802
00:34:35,713 --> 00:34:37,193
- Yeah, how about that?
- Interesting.
803
00:34:37,422 --> 00:34:40,005
Yeah, she's, uh... And she's pregnant too.
Still workin'.
804
00:34:40,088 --> 00:34:43,338
And, uh, you know, the baby,
whenever she's, like, close to a clue,
805
00:34:43,422 --> 00:34:46,463
or, like, one of her hunches is,
like, uh, you know, close,
806
00:34:46,547 --> 00:34:47,588
the baby kicks,
807
00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:50,088
you know, and the harder it kicks,
the closer she is.
808
00:34:50,172 --> 00:34:51,838
And, uh, that's where I'm at right now.
809
00:34:51,922 --> 00:34:53,797
I... I... I don't know what to do
once, um...
810
00:34:54,213 --> 00:34:55,838
you know, when she, um, gives birth.
811
00:34:55,922 --> 00:34:57,130
- But, um...
- Hmm.
812
00:34:57,213 --> 00:34:59,922
Hey, you dumb son of a bitch!
813
00:35:00,297 --> 00:35:01,422
Choose a lane!
814
00:35:02,338 --> 00:35:03,172
That was nuts.
815
00:35:03,255 --> 00:35:05,189
Don't know what that was.
816
00:35:05,213 --> 00:35:06,213
Oh, this town.
817
00:35:06,755 --> 00:35:09,005
Ah, the angry people in this town...
818
00:35:11,588 --> 00:35:12,588
Yeah.
819
00:35:18,422 --> 00:35:19,297
Want some music maybe?
820
00:35:19,380 --> 00:35:20,713
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
821
00:35:20,797 --> 00:35:21,797
Genius.
822
00:35:25,505 --> 00:35:27,755
Dude, we're gonna get to Nick's so late.
823
00:35:27,838 --> 00:35:29,963
It's fine.
Everybody shows up to parties late.
824
00:35:30,047 --> 00:35:32,088
It's like, it's cooler to be late.
825
00:35:32,172 --> 00:35:33,880
We're gonna arrive right at the crest.
826
00:35:33,963 --> 00:35:35,880
Before you know it,
you'll be neck deep in Ryan.
827
00:35:36,172 --> 00:35:38,297
Neck deep in what direction?
828
00:35:38,380 --> 00:35:41,838
- You tell me.
- I don't know. I don't know anything.
829
00:35:41,922 --> 00:35:44,838
This is like your nightmare about
having to land a commercial airliner,
830
00:35:44,922 --> 00:35:46,713
but much, much worse.
831
00:35:47,922 --> 00:35:50,713
I mean, is it? Is it worse?
832
00:35:50,797 --> 00:35:51,880
Well, yeah.
833
00:35:51,963 --> 00:35:53,603
I had the lives of 100 people
in my hands.
834
00:35:53,630 --> 00:35:55,672
My crew was counting on me.
I was their Sully.
835
00:35:55,755 --> 00:35:58,588
- I'm really stressed about it.
- I-m... Okay, I know you are.
836
00:35:58,672 --> 00:36:00,088
If only there was just...
837
00:36:01,130 --> 00:36:03,130
a video of people hookin' up.
838
00:36:05,088 --> 00:36:06,963
Sorry, are you talking about porn?
839
00:36:07,047 --> 00:36:08,130
- All I'm saying...
- No.
840
00:36:08,213 --> 00:36:11,755
No one would know
if you watched one porn one time.
841
00:36:12,422 --> 00:36:13,755
Think of it as a documentary.
842
00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:16,422
Just a sexy documentary. It's a hot doc.
843
00:36:16,505 --> 00:36:19,172
All of those women
are European trafficking victims.
844
00:36:19,255 --> 00:36:21,898
Excuse me, ma'am, are you judging
other people's sexual preferences?
845
00:36:21,922 --> 00:36:24,922
- 'Cause you fuck a panda every night.
- "Fuck a panda..." So fucking funny!
846
00:36:25,005 --> 00:36:28,422
Are you about to say you're gonna judge me
for dabbling in pornography?
847
00:36:28,505 --> 00:36:31,547
- Thought you were a sex-positive feminist.
- Are you insane?
848
00:36:32,088 --> 00:36:34,338
Principal Brown is right there.
849
00:36:34,422 --> 00:36:36,588
- I have headphones.
- He's four feet away from us.
850
00:36:36,672 --> 00:36:38,547
I have headphones, madam.
851
00:36:39,963 --> 00:36:43,005
All right, but once we get a sense
of the mechanics,
852
00:36:43,088 --> 00:36:46,588
- I am shutting it off real quick.
- Of course.
853
00:36:48,338 --> 00:36:49,797
It's for educational purposes.
854
00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:52,588
Educational purposes.
855
00:37:00,755 --> 00:37:02,463
Plug in. Your phone's gonna die.
856
00:37:02,922 --> 00:37:04,322
Um...
857
00:37:07,630 --> 00:37:09,088
- Principal Brown?
- Oh.
858
00:37:09,172 --> 00:37:10,547
Principal Brown was my dad.
859
00:37:11,005 --> 00:37:12,148
- Uh...
- Just call me Jordan.
860
00:37:12,172 --> 00:37:13,047
Uh...
861
00:37:13,130 --> 00:37:14,630
No, thank you. Principal Brown?
862
00:37:14,713 --> 00:37:15,713
- Yes.
- I'm so...
863
00:37:15,755 --> 00:37:17,338
Uh, do you have a phone charger?
864
00:37:17,422 --> 00:37:18,963
- No, I don't.
- Oh.
865
00:37:19,047 --> 00:37:20,088
Got like 13.
866
00:37:20,172 --> 00:37:22,088
Yeah, here. Here you go. Catch.
867
00:37:24,547 --> 00:37:26,422
Didn't know you could do that
from that angle.
868
00:37:27,963 --> 00:37:29,505
Oh, wait, what did I miss?
869
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:31,439
- Go back, actually.
- Yeah, scroll back.
870
00:37:31,463 --> 00:37:33,588
- The part... Wait, start right there.
- Oh, there.
871
00:37:34,797 --> 00:37:37,637
If you guys want to listen to your music,
I can just plug it in up here.
872
00:37:37,672 --> 00:37:39,672
- No! No! No!
- No! No!
873
00:37:39,755 --> 00:37:41,213
No, fuck!
874
00:37:41,297 --> 00:37:43,963
That's fuckin' hot.
875
00:37:44,047 --> 00:37:45,922
Yes!
876
00:37:47,630 --> 00:37:49,505
Come on! Come on!
877
00:37:57,838 --> 00:37:58,838
Don't touch me.
878
00:38:01,547 --> 00:38:02,797
Was that Cardi B?
879
00:38:06,672 --> 00:38:09,130
- You... Oh, my God! You are the...
- I cannot believe it!
880
00:38:09,213 --> 00:38:11,130
- You are the devil!
- I'm gonna die!
881
00:38:11,213 --> 00:38:13,338
I'm literally gonna physically die!
882
00:38:13,422 --> 00:38:15,213
Oh, Jesus Christ.
883
00:38:17,713 --> 00:38:18,713
Come in.
884
00:38:20,005 --> 00:38:21,713
He's dead!
885
00:38:21,797 --> 00:38:23,172
What the fuck?
886
00:38:23,255 --> 00:38:24,547
He's dead!
887
00:38:25,130 --> 00:38:26,963
- Wh... Who's dead?
- My husband.
888
00:38:28,047 --> 00:38:29,338
He's been killed!
889
00:38:29,422 --> 00:38:32,047
Okay, Alan, you don't have
to do your entrance
890
00:38:32,130 --> 00:38:34,838
every time somebody arrives, okay?
891
00:38:36,672 --> 00:38:38,880
- What are you guys doing here?
- What is going on?
892
00:38:38,963 --> 00:38:41,172
It's a murder mystery party.
893
00:38:41,963 --> 00:38:44,963
- I've been planning it for months.
- Wait, this is your house? Alan?
894
00:38:45,297 --> 00:38:49,005
Alan, I was so clear in my text
we are looking for Nick's party.
895
00:38:49,088 --> 00:38:51,880
My husband, Robert,
was an esteemed Broadway director
896
00:38:51,963 --> 00:38:53,755
and the love of my life.
897
00:38:54,130 --> 00:38:55,672
And he's been killed.
898
00:38:56,213 --> 00:38:57,963
Like a dog in the street.
899
00:38:58,047 --> 00:39:00,713
- Was he stabbed?
- That sounds very tragic.
900
00:39:01,130 --> 00:39:03,630
But there's been a mistake.
We're looking for Nick's party.
901
00:39:03,713 --> 00:39:05,838
Do you have the address? We can't find it.
902
00:39:05,922 --> 00:39:07,422
I don't know a Nick.
903
00:39:08,172 --> 00:39:09,713
I only know sorrow...
904
00:39:10,588 --> 00:39:11,713
and grief.
905
00:39:11,797 --> 00:39:12,922
Okay, you're at a ten.
906
00:39:13,005 --> 00:39:14,463
I need you at a two.
907
00:39:17,088 --> 00:39:19,255
I have a wake to plan.
908
00:39:19,338 --> 00:39:21,463
Okay, well, if you guys are here,
909
00:39:21,547 --> 00:39:23,547
you might as well take
some of the extra characters
910
00:39:23,588 --> 00:39:25,922
- since two people decided not to show up.
- No...
911
00:39:26,172 --> 00:39:27,172
Okay.
912
00:39:29,463 --> 00:39:31,898
- Adorable farmer new to the city.
- We don't need characters.
913
00:39:31,922 --> 00:39:35,463
- We're not staying.
- Hideous barren orthodontist.
914
00:39:35,547 --> 00:39:36,672
Why am I barren?
915
00:39:36,755 --> 00:39:38,963
Am I here to farm
or have I given up that life?
916
00:39:39,047 --> 00:39:40,422
This just says "orthodontist."
917
00:39:40,505 --> 00:39:42,838
- Your backstories are in the packets.
- No, no.
918
00:39:42,922 --> 00:39:45,297
We are not staying.
We're going to Nick's party.
919
00:39:45,380 --> 00:39:46,672
- We can just stay for...
- No.
920
00:39:46,755 --> 00:39:49,213
- The one where someone ate a ghost pepper?
- Yes.
921
00:39:49,297 --> 00:39:52,380
Yeah, somebody here came from there,
I think. Maybe the mayor.
922
00:39:53,297 --> 00:39:55,588
Go! Immerse yourselves.
923
00:39:55,672 --> 00:39:58,463
Review your histories in the parlor.
924
00:39:58,963 --> 00:40:01,398
Okay, if your characters aren't married,
hands off each other.
925
00:40:01,422 --> 00:40:02,422
No!
926
00:40:03,963 --> 00:40:04,880
Oh.
927
00:40:04,963 --> 00:40:06,672
Do not go gently.
928
00:40:06,755 --> 00:40:07,755
Oh, she's really good.
929
00:40:08,463 --> 00:40:09,672
Oh, my God! You guys are here.
930
00:40:09,755 --> 00:40:11,189
- How'd you get here?
- What the fuck?
931
00:40:11,213 --> 00:40:12,338
How did you get here?
932
00:40:12,422 --> 00:40:13,422
And how are you dry?
933
00:40:13,797 --> 00:40:15,213
How are you dry?
934
00:40:15,297 --> 00:40:16,963
Aaron, I can see you breathing.
935
00:40:17,422 --> 00:40:19,297
Gigi? Mm. Dig deeper.
936
00:40:19,380 --> 00:40:20,755
- I don't know what...
- I don't...
937
00:40:20,838 --> 00:40:21,672
- She was like...
- Oh!
938
00:40:21,755 --> 00:40:22,797
I can't think about it.
939
00:40:23,130 --> 00:40:24,672
Oh, is it over?
940
00:40:24,755 --> 00:40:28,463
No! Stop! Mom, do not talk to the actors!
The house is mine till 11 p.m.
941
00:40:28,755 --> 00:40:31,588
Cindy, I swear to fucking God!
942
00:40:33,463 --> 00:40:36,422
- Jesus Christ! God.
- Gigi! What the fuck?
943
00:40:36,505 --> 00:40:38,047
Guys, the re-election is coming up
944
00:40:38,130 --> 00:40:40,088
and I need to know
if I have to buy your votes.
945
00:40:40,172 --> 00:40:41,422
Wait, are you the mayor?
946
00:40:41,505 --> 00:40:42,922
Do you know where Nick's party is?
947
00:40:43,005 --> 00:40:44,925
Of course I do.
I know where all the parties are.
948
00:40:44,963 --> 00:40:45,797
Where is it?
949
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:47,838
Come into my office, now.
950
00:40:47,922 --> 00:40:49,130
Okay, thank you.
951
00:40:49,630 --> 00:40:52,422
In, in, in. Go, go, go.
Come, come, come. Now, now, now!
952
00:40:54,213 --> 00:40:55,380
Okay.
953
00:40:56,380 --> 00:40:57,422
You can't tell anyone.
954
00:40:57,838 --> 00:40:58,838
We won't.
955
00:40:59,005 --> 00:41:00,047
Not even each other.
956
00:41:00,672 --> 00:41:01,672
Okay.
957
00:41:02,213 --> 00:41:03,588
Nick's party...
958
00:41:07,505 --> 00:41:08,505
is at...
959
00:41:09,463 --> 00:41:10,505
his aunt's house.
960
00:41:11,213 --> 00:41:12,963
We know it's at his au...
961
00:41:13,047 --> 00:41:15,755
Amy, I swear to God,
I need to get out of here.
962
00:41:15,838 --> 00:41:18,047
By the way, I am pretty impressed
963
00:41:18,130 --> 00:41:20,338
with how well you guys
are holding it together.
964
00:41:20,422 --> 00:41:22,047
You're doing fantastic.
965
00:41:22,380 --> 00:41:24,463
What do you mean?
966
00:41:24,547 --> 00:41:27,130
I thought the strawberries
would have hit by now.
967
00:41:27,213 --> 00:41:28,588
Why would strawberries hit?
968
00:41:28,672 --> 00:41:33,172
Because they were dipped
in an unbelievably potent drug.
969
00:41:33,255 --> 00:41:36,213
It's like ayahuasca, but Asian.
970
00:41:37,297 --> 00:41:38,838
Asian-huasca.
971
00:41:40,088 --> 00:41:41,208
I told you guys that, right?
972
00:41:41,255 --> 00:41:43,505
- No, no, no, no, no.
- I can't...
973
00:41:43,588 --> 00:41:46,297
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
974
00:41:48,630 --> 00:41:49,838
Pull me back in.
975
00:41:50,505 --> 00:41:51,963
Pull me back in.
976
00:41:55,422 --> 00:41:58,088
Oh, my mom has a scarf that color.
977
00:41:58,172 --> 00:41:59,172
Listen to me.
978
00:41:59,713 --> 00:42:00,713
We're gonna be fine.
979
00:42:00,963 --> 00:42:02,172
One time I threw up,
980
00:42:02,255 --> 00:42:05,630
and my mom caught it in her hands,
'cause she loves me.
981
00:42:05,713 --> 00:42:06,880
We are healthy,
982
00:42:07,130 --> 00:42:08,880
nubile, young women,
983
00:42:09,255 --> 00:42:11,213
and we just need to stay calm.
984
00:42:11,630 --> 00:42:12,880
We are gonna be...
985
00:42:33,463 --> 00:42:34,463
What?
986
00:42:34,755 --> 00:42:36,422
What the fuck?
987
00:42:37,172 --> 00:42:40,005
What the fuck? What is happening?
988
00:42:43,297 --> 00:42:44,963
Why do you look like that?
989
00:42:45,047 --> 00:42:47,088
Uh, Molly, y... you're a fucking doll.
990
00:42:47,172 --> 00:42:49,838
- No, you're a fucking doll.
- What?
991
00:42:50,713 --> 00:42:52,880
Ow! Fuck, that hurt.
992
00:42:52,963 --> 00:42:55,630
And my boobs are too heavy.
I have no core.
993
00:42:55,713 --> 00:42:57,297
Our legs don't bend.
994
00:42:57,380 --> 00:42:59,422
They're twice as long as our torsos.
995
00:42:59,505 --> 00:43:01,630
These proportions are insane!
996
00:43:01,713 --> 00:43:02,963
Where's my chub?
997
00:43:03,047 --> 00:43:04,505
Wait, where are you going?
998
00:43:05,047 --> 00:43:06,807
- This is crazy.
- Wait for me.
999
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:10,297
I have to see for myself.
1000
00:43:10,380 --> 00:43:12,463
Well, I've never done the splits
in my life.
1001
00:43:13,463 --> 00:43:14,713
Amy!
1002
00:43:15,547 --> 00:43:17,297
Help! Molly, help me!
1003
00:43:17,380 --> 00:43:19,547
Oh, my God! Don't look down, Amy, no!
1004
00:43:19,630 --> 00:43:21,005
I... I can't reach!
1005
00:43:21,463 --> 00:43:23,463
You have to put my heel in your hole.
1006
00:43:23,547 --> 00:43:25,880
- My heel...? Your heel in my what?
- Your hole!
1007
00:43:25,963 --> 00:43:28,422
- What hole?
- The corn hole!
1008
00:43:28,505 --> 00:43:29,880
Oh. Fuck!
1009
00:43:30,255 --> 00:43:31,255
Molly!
1010
00:43:34,130 --> 00:43:35,588
Oh, my God.
1011
00:43:35,672 --> 00:43:37,422
Um, what the fuck am I wearing?
1012
00:43:39,380 --> 00:43:40,380
Where's my vag?
1013
00:43:40,463 --> 00:43:41,880
Uh, Molly, I have no genitals.
1014
00:43:41,963 --> 00:43:44,005
How do I pee? How do I shit?
1015
00:43:44,088 --> 00:43:47,130
I mean, I don't even have nipples.
These are just mounds.
1016
00:43:47,338 --> 00:43:49,297
My whole body's like a fucking dolphin.
1017
00:43:49,713 --> 00:43:50,755
Just... just...
1018
00:43:51,380 --> 00:43:53,047
Perfect, round.
1019
00:43:53,463 --> 00:43:55,297
- Huge mounds.
- Uh, what?
1020
00:43:55,380 --> 00:43:57,338
Look at my body. I am beautiful.
1021
00:43:57,422 --> 00:43:59,182
No, don't get sucked in.
1022
00:43:59,213 --> 00:44:01,172
This is our nightmare, Amy.
1023
00:44:01,255 --> 00:44:03,630
I know this is unrealistic
and bad for women,
1024
00:44:03,713 --> 00:44:05,463
but... is it bad?
1025
00:44:05,547 --> 00:44:07,088
Because I feel pretty good.
1026
00:44:07,172 --> 00:44:08,713
I mean, this ass won't quit.
1027
00:44:08,797 --> 00:44:10,755
Amy, use your brain!
1028
00:44:10,838 --> 00:44:15,047
I don't need to use my brain.
I just need to be smooth and flexible.
1029
00:44:15,130 --> 00:44:17,005
Look at you, you bad bitch.
1030
00:44:17,797 --> 00:44:20,130
Okay, that's it, we have to wake up.
1031
00:44:20,213 --> 00:44:22,422
My, my, my. Mm.
1032
00:44:23,672 --> 00:44:26,963
I think I might, like,
actually stay here for a while.
1033
00:44:27,047 --> 00:44:29,380
No, I won't let you do this.
1034
00:44:29,713 --> 00:44:31,672
Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop!
1035
00:44:31,755 --> 00:44:34,088
You need to throw up.
1036
00:44:34,172 --> 00:44:37,088
Let me have this body!
1037
00:44:37,172 --> 00:44:40,297
Now that the amuse-bouche
of bacon-wrapped dates is over,
1038
00:44:40,380 --> 00:44:43,630
why don't we play a rousing round
of J'accuse!
1039
00:44:51,255 --> 00:44:53,005
Fuck you, George.
1040
00:44:54,547 --> 00:44:56,130
Who is she supposed to be?
1041
00:44:57,213 --> 00:44:58,630
The orthodontist.
1042
00:45:00,380 --> 00:45:01,838
We're okay.
1043
00:45:02,505 --> 00:45:03,505
We're okay.
1044
00:45:04,005 --> 00:45:05,130
We did it.
1045
00:45:05,213 --> 00:45:08,005
We went... we went to two parties,
we did drugs.
1046
00:45:08,963 --> 00:45:10,130
We can say we went out.
1047
00:45:11,088 --> 00:45:12,880
- Let's go home.
- What?
1048
00:45:12,963 --> 00:45:14,838
No, the plan is to go to Nick's.
1049
00:45:14,922 --> 00:45:16,922
We have to stick to the plan.
1050
00:45:18,088 --> 00:45:20,630
Dude, nothing has gone
according to plan tonight.
1051
00:45:20,713 --> 00:45:23,353
Which is why we have to stick to the plan.
Let's call another Lyft.
1052
00:45:23,380 --> 00:45:24,755
Why are you being so pushy?
1053
00:45:24,838 --> 00:45:27,630
Honestly, pushy is a compliment.
You know who else was pushy?
1054
00:45:27,713 --> 00:45:29,463
Diane Sawyer, Joan of Arc,
1055
00:45:29,547 --> 00:45:32,172
- Queen Noor of Jordan...
- I know where Queen Noor is from!
1056
00:45:32,255 --> 00:45:34,297
Once we get to Nick's,
all of this will be worth it.
1057
00:45:34,380 --> 00:45:37,255
Just forget about about Nick's!
No one will even tell us where it is.
1058
00:45:37,338 --> 00:45:39,130
Why are you being so obsessed
with his party?
1059
00:45:39,213 --> 00:45:41,422
- Because she loves him.
- Oh, my God.
1060
00:45:41,505 --> 00:45:44,255
Gigi, stop doing that!
1061
00:45:44,338 --> 00:45:46,172
- What did you say?
- Molly loves Nick.
1062
00:45:46,255 --> 00:45:48,463
Can you please stop
repeating that sentence?
1063
00:45:48,547 --> 00:45:49,963
Because it's not true.
1064
00:45:50,047 --> 00:45:51,505
- Molly hates Nick.
- Thank you.
1065
00:45:51,588 --> 00:45:54,255
She projects disgust
to cover up a deep desire.
1066
00:45:54,338 --> 00:45:56,713
No. No. N-O. Thanks.
1067
00:45:56,797 --> 00:45:59,477
Uh, you actually... You drugged us
and tried to throw us off a boat.
1068
00:45:59,505 --> 00:46:00,672
I did. I did.
1069
00:46:00,755 --> 00:46:02,838
So nothing you say is of any value to us.
1070
00:46:02,922 --> 00:46:04,797
So... Oh, you're...
1071
00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,400
Yeah, no, you can stop flipping me off
1072
00:46:06,463 --> 00:46:08,422
because you should flip off,
so shut the fuck up.
1073
00:46:08,505 --> 00:46:11,422
Madam Mayor, what are you doing out here?
1074
00:46:11,505 --> 00:46:13,047
George locked himself in the closet.
1075
00:46:13,130 --> 00:46:14,130
Fuck!
1076
00:46:14,297 --> 00:46:15,463
Dude.
1077
00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:16,880
No.
1078
00:46:19,838 --> 00:46:20,838
Dude?
1079
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:22,880
No.
1080
00:46:23,838 --> 00:46:24,880
I don't like him.
1081
00:46:25,963 --> 00:46:27,755
Yes, maybe he is...
1082
00:46:28,380 --> 00:46:31,297
classically, traditionally handsome
and weirdly charming,
1083
00:46:31,380 --> 00:46:34,880
and maybe my innate biology
registers him as an ideal mate,
1084
00:46:34,963 --> 00:46:38,255
and yes, maybe I occasionally fantasize
about him sweeping me off my feet.
1085
00:46:38,338 --> 00:46:41,297
And some weaker people
might call that a tiny crush,
1086
00:46:41,380 --> 00:46:43,380
but I can ignore it,
I can fight against it,
1087
00:46:43,463 --> 00:46:45,213
because we all have weird interests.
1088
00:46:45,297 --> 00:46:47,657
And the important thing is
that we just... we shove 'em down
1089
00:46:47,713 --> 00:46:49,380
and we never speak about them again.
1090
00:46:50,797 --> 00:46:52,672
You don't have to shove anything down.
1091
00:46:53,422 --> 00:46:54,588
Yeah.
1092
00:46:54,672 --> 00:46:58,297
Yeah. Yeah, I do,
because I can't like him.
1093
00:46:58,380 --> 00:47:02,130
Maybe my body can like him
but my mind knows that that's stupid,
1094
00:47:02,213 --> 00:47:03,880
because he's just... he's a jock,
1095
00:47:03,963 --> 00:47:06,003
and all he cares about
is being cool and having fun,
1096
00:47:06,047 --> 00:47:08,880
and he doesn't even look at girls
unless they look like Triple A.
1097
00:47:08,963 --> 00:47:11,880
And he definitely doesn't want me
because I'm a butter personality.
1098
00:47:13,338 --> 00:47:16,380
How dare you say that
about my best friend?
1099
00:47:16,463 --> 00:47:17,755
Amy, you fucking slapped me...
1100
00:47:17,838 --> 00:47:20,038
If you ever say anything like that
about yourself again,
1101
00:47:20,088 --> 00:47:22,963
I will fucking lay you out, okay?
1102
00:47:23,172 --> 00:47:24,963
You are the strongest, coolest,
1103
00:47:25,047 --> 00:47:27,047
smartest, most stunningly
gorgeous creature
1104
00:47:27,130 --> 00:47:29,172
this high school and this Earth
1105
00:47:29,255 --> 00:47:30,255
has ever seen.
1106
00:47:30,338 --> 00:47:34,838
And Nick Howland would be so fucking lucky
to be a footnote in your story.
1107
00:47:35,672 --> 00:47:36,880
So we're going to his party.
1108
00:47:36,963 --> 00:47:38,047
Are you serious?
1109
00:47:38,130 --> 00:47:39,297
I am dead serious.
1110
00:47:40,297 --> 00:47:42,713
If Nick's what you want,
then that's what you deserve.
1111
00:47:44,088 --> 00:47:47,172
How? How are we gonna find out
where the party is?
1112
00:47:47,755 --> 00:47:49,130
By doing what we do best.
1113
00:47:50,047 --> 00:47:51,713
Motherfuckin' homework.
1114
00:48:12,838 --> 00:48:14,731
- I will now be attempting...
- Wait. Look.
1115
00:48:14,755 --> 00:48:16,797
...15 pizza boxes.
1116
00:48:18,463 --> 00:48:21,672
How many orders that big do you think
Lido's could have filled tonight?
1117
00:48:22,797 --> 00:48:23,880
- Genius.
- Yeah.
1118
00:48:50,297 --> 00:48:53,047
Two half-cheese, half-sausage pizzas
1119
00:48:53,338 --> 00:48:56,130
are just one cheese and one sausage pizza,
1120
00:48:56,422 --> 00:48:58,005
you fucking morons.
1121
00:48:58,088 --> 00:48:59,088
Jesus.
1122
00:49:00,297 --> 00:49:01,297
Oh, God.
1123
00:49:09,797 --> 00:49:12,463
- Everybody down! 911! Stay down.
- Oh, my God! What the fuck?
1124
00:49:12,547 --> 00:49:14,005
Fuck! What the fuck is this?
1125
00:49:14,088 --> 00:49:16,338
- We ask the questions!
- Oh, my God.
1126
00:49:16,422 --> 00:49:18,422
Oh, shit, shit!
Is this some Manson family shit?
1127
00:49:18,505 --> 00:49:19,922
- What is this?
- No!
1128
00:49:20,338 --> 00:49:22,588
No! Everything is gonna be just fine!
1129
00:49:22,672 --> 00:49:26,172
You're just gonna give us the address to
where you delivered some pizzas tonight.
1130
00:49:28,422 --> 00:49:31,542
Oh, my God. Are you guys out of your
fucking mind? How old are you, by the way?
1131
00:49:31,588 --> 00:49:33,380
- Uh...
- Does not matter!
1132
00:49:33,463 --> 00:49:35,422
Okay, that voice did not
make you sound older.
1133
00:49:35,505 --> 00:49:37,088
So you're basically children,
1134
00:49:37,172 --> 00:49:39,547
and you just willingly got in the car
of a strange man.
1135
00:49:39,630 --> 00:49:41,005
Do you guys have a weapon?
1136
00:49:41,630 --> 00:49:42,630
Yes?
1137
00:49:42,755 --> 00:49:45,380
If we claim to have a weapon,
this might be a felony.
1138
00:49:45,880 --> 00:49:46,713
Fuck.
1139
00:49:46,797 --> 00:49:49,713
- Yes.
- Okay, so you're using your hair as a mask
1140
00:49:49,797 --> 00:49:51,672
and trying to rob someone with no weapon.
1141
00:49:51,755 --> 00:49:52,922
'Cause the funny thing is,
1142
00:49:53,005 --> 00:49:55,338
- I actually have a weapon.
- Fuck!
1143
00:49:55,422 --> 00:49:57,130
- Dear God, no! You have a gun?
- Fuck! No!
1144
00:49:57,213 --> 00:50:00,172
I keep that to protect myself
from bad people,
1145
00:50:00,255 --> 00:50:01,775
something you guys should think about.
1146
00:50:01,838 --> 00:50:05,338
Did the... did the possibility
of sexual assault ever enter your minds?
1147
00:50:06,172 --> 00:50:07,005
Not really.
1148
00:50:07,088 --> 00:50:08,797
Yeah, not really, I can tell.
1149
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:11,213
You were spendin' more time on,
like, the hair
1150
00:50:11,297 --> 00:50:13,505
and that... that whole part of it,
maybe, yeah.
1151
00:50:13,588 --> 00:50:16,213
'Cause... 'cause we're like...
right by the freeway.
1152
00:50:16,297 --> 00:50:19,005
I could have you across the state line
in, like, 40 minutes,
1153
00:50:19,088 --> 00:50:21,880
take you to some cabin,
hog tie your ankles,
1154
00:50:21,963 --> 00:50:23,880
leave you in a room
with, like, a saucer of milk
1155
00:50:23,963 --> 00:50:25,922
and videotape the whole thing
for a couple days.
1156
00:50:26,005 --> 00:50:27,088
- What?
- What?
1157
00:50:27,172 --> 00:50:28,088
- No.
- Think about that.
1158
00:50:28,172 --> 00:50:30,005
- What?
- No, I'm not gonna think about...
1159
00:50:30,088 --> 00:50:31,713
We just need you to give us the address
1160
00:50:31,797 --> 00:50:34,172
to where you delivered
this huge order tonight.
1161
00:50:35,588 --> 00:50:37,297
Oh, shit, that p...
1162
00:50:40,880 --> 00:50:42,672
Okay, you know what?
1163
00:50:43,755 --> 00:50:45,273
Let me give you the address.
1164
00:50:45,297 --> 00:50:46,547
I feel like if I don't...
1165
00:50:46,630 --> 00:50:48,439
...you guys are so stupid,
1166
00:50:48,463 --> 00:50:52,297
some dog walker's gonna find
your bodies tomorrow under some overpass.
1167
00:50:52,380 --> 00:50:54,088
- Okay.
- Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
1168
00:50:54,172 --> 00:50:56,064
- Don't show me your pass code!
- Oh, that's fair!
1169
00:50:56,088 --> 00:50:58,338
- Okay, sorry.
- That's the whole thing with pass codes.
1170
00:50:58,422 --> 00:50:59,880
I'm just copying the address.
1171
00:50:59,963 --> 00:51:02,005
That's your private information.
1172
00:51:02,088 --> 00:51:04,713
- Thank you!
- Thank you so much!
1173
00:51:04,797 --> 00:51:06,088
Oh, my God!
1174
00:51:06,172 --> 00:51:07,172
Um...
1175
00:51:07,422 --> 00:51:08,463
Quick Q.
1176
00:51:08,547 --> 00:51:11,922
Now that we're already in your car,
would you mind driving us there?
1177
00:51:13,630 --> 00:51:14,463
Yeah, why not?
1178
00:51:14,547 --> 00:51:16,338
- Oh, great!
- I'm being sarcastic!
1179
00:51:16,422 --> 00:51:17,981
- Get the fuck out of my car!
- Oh!
1180
00:51:18,005 --> 00:51:19,297
- Okay!
- Thank you so much!
1181
00:51:19,380 --> 00:51:21,880
Don't trust people. Oh, my God.
1182
00:51:23,255 --> 00:51:25,672
Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh, my God!
1183
00:51:25,755 --> 00:51:29,130
- Oh!
- You were incredible! You were so scary.
1184
00:51:29,213 --> 00:51:32,380
If you were a criminal, you'd be
the best fucking criminal in Los Angeles.
1185
00:51:32,463 --> 00:51:33,463
Aaah! Oh!
1186
00:51:33,547 --> 00:51:36,213
Okay. Great, let's call a chariot.
1187
00:51:39,130 --> 00:51:42,463
Fuck! I left my phone in his car!
1188
00:51:42,547 --> 00:51:44,630
Why did I have to use a visual aid?
1189
00:51:44,713 --> 00:51:45,922
- Wait!
- It's okay!
1190
00:51:46,005 --> 00:51:49,172
Amy, Amy, we will get it tomorrow.
It's fine. I'll use mine. I'll use mine.
1191
00:51:49,922 --> 00:51:52,380
I'm at two percent?
Why the fuck am I at two percent?
1192
00:51:52,463 --> 00:51:54,005
Why is my battery so low?
1193
00:51:54,547 --> 00:51:57,755
The porn. We streamed a lot of porn.
1194
00:51:58,172 --> 00:51:59,588
Just... Just... Just call a Lyft.
1195
00:51:59,672 --> 00:52:01,130
No, I can't call a Lyft,
1196
00:52:01,213 --> 00:52:04,922
because if my phone dies and the driver
can't contact us, we are fucked!
1197
00:52:05,422 --> 00:52:06,547
Unless...
1198
00:52:10,380 --> 00:52:12,020
- Pick up, pick up.
- Who are you calling?
1199
00:52:12,088 --> 00:52:14,755
Hi, it's Molly and Amy. We're
at Lido's Pizza on Victory Boulevard.
1200
00:52:14,838 --> 00:52:17,088
We are stranded.
Please pick us up, we need...
1201
00:52:19,505 --> 00:52:20,505
It died.
1202
00:52:24,880 --> 00:52:27,148
- We could hitchhike.
- Are you aching to be murdered?
1203
00:52:27,172 --> 00:52:29,380
Well, I'm just throwin' out
suggestions here.
1204
00:52:42,672 --> 00:52:43,797
You girls need a ride?
1205
00:52:47,172 --> 00:52:48,648
- Shotgun!
- I'll take the front!
1206
00:52:48,672 --> 00:52:50,380
So cool! Just gonna...
1207
00:52:50,630 --> 00:52:52,023
- Amy, what are you doing?
- No, I...
1208
00:52:52,047 --> 00:52:53,922
My... My legs are, like,
half an inch longer...
1209
00:52:54,005 --> 00:52:56,338
Okay, you know I get car sick, Amy.
What... Oh!
1210
00:52:56,422 --> 00:52:58,273
- Just let me go!
- You're embarrassing me.
1211
00:52:58,297 --> 00:52:59,898
- Stop...
- You're embarrassing me!
1212
00:52:59,922 --> 00:53:02,505
Thank you so much, Miss Fine.
You totally saved us.
1213
00:53:02,588 --> 00:53:05,338
Please. You two saved me
from re-watching Gilmore Girls.
1214
00:53:05,422 --> 00:53:07,422
I've seen it, like, 50 times.
1215
00:53:07,797 --> 00:53:10,505
Okay, wait, so what is this address
I'm taking you to?
1216
00:53:10,588 --> 00:53:12,422
It's, uh...
it's Nick Howland's aunt's house.
1217
00:53:12,505 --> 00:53:14,838
It's... It's... It's a party, technically.
1218
00:53:15,255 --> 00:53:18,213
You two want me to drive you
to an unsupervised house party?
1219
00:53:18,297 --> 00:53:19,838
Oh... well...
1220
00:53:19,922 --> 00:53:23,005
Good. I'm glad you guys are having
some fun before graduation. Uh!
1221
00:53:24,422 --> 00:53:25,255
Really?
1222
00:53:25,338 --> 00:53:28,880
Yes. Oh, my gosh, yes. I don't want
you guys to make the same mistake I did.
1223
00:53:29,213 --> 00:53:30,088
What do you mean?
1224
00:53:30,172 --> 00:53:32,047
I spent the majority of my 20s
1225
00:53:32,130 --> 00:53:34,963
overcompensating for the fact
that I never had fun in high school.
1226
00:53:35,047 --> 00:53:38,047
And, you know, the pendulum then swung
in a completely different direction.
1227
00:53:38,130 --> 00:53:39,422
I mean, I went crazy.
1228
00:53:39,505 --> 00:53:41,797
I had some really dark moments
there in my 20s,
1229
00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:44,088
like, some really dark moments.
1230
00:53:44,922 --> 00:53:47,880
Like, it was bad.
You know I'm banned from Jamba Juice?
1231
00:53:48,338 --> 00:53:51,213
Like, not a single Jamba Juice,
like every Jamba Juice.
1232
00:53:51,297 --> 00:53:52,630
That came down from corporate.
1233
00:53:52,713 --> 00:53:55,213
Do you know how many Jamba Juices
there are in this country?
1234
00:53:55,297 --> 00:53:56,588
Like, a bajillion.
1235
00:53:56,755 --> 00:53:58,922
It's a national chain, it's a sensation.
1236
00:53:59,005 --> 00:54:01,505
I cannot have another Mango-A-Go-Go
ever again.
1237
00:54:01,588 --> 00:54:03,463
But, look, I don't want that for you.
1238
00:54:03,547 --> 00:54:05,422
Okay? You still have a chance.
1239
00:54:05,505 --> 00:54:07,981
I want you two to go to this party,
and I want you to have fun.
1240
00:54:08,005 --> 00:54:10,088
Because tonight is your night.
1241
00:54:10,172 --> 00:54:11,047
- Yes! Yes!
- Yes!
1242
00:54:11,130 --> 00:54:11,963
Okay.
1243
00:54:12,047 --> 00:54:12,880
- Yes.
- Yes.
1244
00:54:12,963 --> 00:54:15,630
So, what are you two wearing?
1245
00:54:15,713 --> 00:54:17,005
Uh, we were thinking...
1246
00:54:17,088 --> 00:54:18,088
uh...
1247
00:54:18,713 --> 00:54:19,797
Well, just this...
1248
00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:21,630
this... this, uh... this look.
1249
00:54:21,713 --> 00:54:23,505
You do know you guys are matching, right?
1250
00:54:23,588 --> 00:54:26,922
We added this embellishment here.
1251
00:54:27,005 --> 00:54:30,255
Well, lucky for you two,
I'm a single woman livin' in Los Angeles,
1252
00:54:30,338 --> 00:54:32,713
so I got a lot of shit in this car.
1253
00:54:32,797 --> 00:54:34,838
Why don't y'all go through
some of those bags?
1254
00:54:34,922 --> 00:54:36,402
I'm sorry, we can touch your clothes?
1255
00:54:36,463 --> 00:54:38,255
Yes, please. Please, touch my clothes.
1256
00:54:38,338 --> 00:54:40,178
- Please get a change of clothes.
- This night!
1257
00:54:47,630 --> 00:54:48,838
- Um...
- Um...
1258
00:54:48,922 --> 00:54:49,922
- Oh...
- Mmm...
1259
00:54:50,005 --> 00:54:52,463
Mmm...
1260
00:54:52,547 --> 00:54:53,630
- I have no breath.
- What?
1261
00:54:53,713 --> 00:54:54,630
Excuse me?
1262
00:54:54,713 --> 00:54:56,523
- Sorry, what?
- I have nowhere to go with this.
1263
00:54:56,547 --> 00:54:58,630
- It's too perfect.
- You are literally glowing.
1264
00:54:58,713 --> 00:55:01,172
You've hit the level of perfection
and now I'm just...
1265
00:55:01,255 --> 00:55:03,314
- Be still my heart.
- You just came out of the water.
1266
00:55:03,338 --> 00:55:05,505
You're fresh from the water,
you're a mermaid here.
1267
00:55:05,588 --> 00:55:07,505
How are you so fucking shiny?
1268
00:55:07,588 --> 00:55:09,422
Can you fetch me an inhaler?
I can't breathe.
1269
00:55:09,505 --> 00:55:11,755
- Um, my eyes. Ow, ow!
- I'm physically unable...
1270
00:55:11,838 --> 00:55:14,047
Ow, my eyes hurt so bad
from your beauty.
1271
00:55:14,130 --> 00:55:15,650
- Um, exsqueeze me, ladies.
- Oh.
1272
00:55:15,713 --> 00:55:17,755
- Oh, sorry.
- There's a... a party to get to.
1273
00:55:19,088 --> 00:55:21,630
- All right.
- I will see you two inside, all right?
1274
00:55:21,713 --> 00:55:23,422
Just kidding. Imagine if I did, though.
1275
00:55:23,505 --> 00:55:25,398
- Just kidding.
- Imagine if I just went in.
1276
00:55:25,422 --> 00:55:26,338
That'd be weird, right?
1277
00:55:26,422 --> 00:55:28,130
That'd be so fun.
1278
00:55:28,213 --> 00:55:30,422
- Anyway, see y'all later.
- Okay, bye.
1279
00:55:38,130 --> 00:55:39,130
Phew.
1280
00:55:41,130 --> 00:55:42,213
Love you.
1281
00:55:42,297 --> 00:55:43,297
Love you.
1282
00:57:09,463 --> 00:57:11,255
- Whoa.
- Another?
1283
00:57:11,338 --> 00:57:12,963
- Here.
- Aaaah!
1284
00:57:14,005 --> 00:57:15,005
You good?
1285
00:57:15,422 --> 00:57:16,422
Yeah.
1286
00:57:17,297 --> 00:57:18,672
- Whoo!
- ¡El Presidente!
1287
00:57:18,755 --> 00:57:20,213
- And the protest lady!
- Whoo!
1288
00:57:20,630 --> 00:57:22,505
Welcome, my little turtledoves.
1289
00:57:22,880 --> 00:57:23,922
How are you?
1290
00:57:24,005 --> 00:57:26,505
Do you guys want to drink or smoke?
Nothing?
1291
00:57:26,963 --> 00:57:28,755
Let me know, okay? I'm your guy tonight.
1292
00:57:28,838 --> 00:57:30,463
I'll take care of you. You're the best.
1293
00:57:30,547 --> 00:57:32,130
You guys honestly freak me out.
1294
00:57:33,005 --> 00:57:35,713
But I'm gonna miss you guys.
Okay? It's all love.
1295
00:57:36,422 --> 00:57:40,005
Class of '19... for fuckin' ever! Whoo!
1296
00:57:42,297 --> 00:57:43,297
Um...
1297
00:57:43,422 --> 00:57:44,255
Ryan.
1298
00:57:44,380 --> 00:57:46,047
- Where? Where?
- Ryan, Ryan, Ryan.
1299
00:57:46,672 --> 00:57:47,547
Oh, God.
1300
00:57:47,630 --> 00:57:49,470
- She's glowing.
- Go get her.
1301
00:57:49,505 --> 00:57:50,505
Hug me.
1302
00:57:52,172 --> 00:57:53,332
- Okay. Get her.
- Phew. Okay.
1303
00:57:53,380 --> 00:57:54,672
Get her. Flick the bean!
1304
00:57:55,630 --> 00:57:57,672
Molly, here's to you, gorgeous.
1305
00:57:57,755 --> 00:57:59,422
- Thank you.
- Of course, of course.
1306
00:57:59,755 --> 00:58:02,422
Tanner, where's the rubbing alcohol?
There's nothing strong enough.
1307
00:58:02,505 --> 00:58:03,672
- No.
- Yep.
1308
00:58:03,755 --> 00:58:05,255
- No.
- I'm here.
1309
00:58:05,338 --> 00:58:06,338
How?
1310
00:58:06,588 --> 00:58:07,797
I'm gonna go downstairs.
1311
00:58:10,172 --> 00:58:11,213
Well...
1312
00:58:11,297 --> 00:58:12,297
Bye, Gigi.
1313
00:58:25,880 --> 00:58:28,713
- I'm so stoked you're here, dude.
- Thanks.
1314
00:58:29,422 --> 00:58:31,088
I've always wanted you to come out.
1315
00:58:31,172 --> 00:58:32,672
Oh, I-I am out.
1316
00:58:33,797 --> 00:58:35,713
I came out in the tenth grade.
1317
00:58:37,213 --> 00:58:40,963
No. I meant, like, come out
and hang out on the weekend.
1318
00:58:42,880 --> 00:58:44,838
Oh, right, that... Hang out.
1319
00:58:44,922 --> 00:58:47,505
- Yeah, that's... that's what I meant also.
- You know,
1320
00:58:47,588 --> 00:58:50,422
you need to have a little bit of fun
before you go to Africa.
1321
00:58:50,505 --> 00:58:51,922
You remembered I'm going to Africa?
1322
00:58:52,005 --> 00:58:54,505
Of course. Aren't you gonna go to,
like, Uganda or something?
1323
00:58:54,588 --> 00:58:57,297
Botswana. They'd kill me in Uganda.
1324
00:58:57,380 --> 00:58:58,213
Why?
1325
00:58:58,297 --> 00:59:00,588
'Cause that's country's
not really a fan of gay people.
1326
00:59:01,047 --> 00:59:02,672
Oh, shit, that's crazy.
1327
00:59:02,755 --> 00:59:04,672
Would you be afraid to go to Uganda...
1328
00:59:04,755 --> 00:59:07,172
- Karaoke in the guest room!
- Jesus!
1329
00:59:07,255 --> 00:59:09,463
God, I've missed you. Fuck.
1330
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:12,797
Do you wanna go do karaoke
in the guest room? I love that girl.
1331
00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:13,713
Yeah.
1332
00:59:13,797 --> 00:59:14,880
- Come on, let's go.
- Okay.
1333
00:59:20,088 --> 00:59:21,547
Uh, elbows.
1334
00:59:21,713 --> 00:59:23,338
Oh, fuck. Re-rack, please?
1335
00:59:23,713 --> 00:59:25,380
Holy shit!
1336
00:59:25,755 --> 00:59:27,297
Wait, Molly's here?
1337
00:59:27,380 --> 00:59:30,047
What a fuckin' compliment
to get Molly to roll.
1338
00:59:30,130 --> 00:59:31,838
Dude, are you actually here right now?
1339
00:59:31,922 --> 00:59:34,838
Is this some mirage?
Am I fucking losing my mind?
1340
00:59:34,922 --> 00:59:37,797
Or did I actually get President Molly
to come out on her weekend?
1341
00:59:37,880 --> 00:59:39,838
It's a purely ceremonial visit.
1342
00:59:39,922 --> 00:59:42,630
Okay, okay. Hey, why don't you sit here?
1343
00:59:42,713 --> 00:59:44,172
Yeah, right next to me, please.
1344
00:59:44,255 --> 00:59:45,797
Sit here and let's go.
1345
00:59:45,880 --> 00:59:48,963
I've been fuckin' waitin' for this
since, like, seventh grade.
1346
00:59:49,130 --> 00:59:50,547
- Please. It's for you.
- Oh.
1347
00:59:50,630 --> 00:59:52,088
This song goes out to my cast.
1348
01:00:03,213 --> 01:00:04,213
Shh.
1349
01:00:23,672 --> 01:00:24,797
Miss Fine.
1350
01:00:25,922 --> 01:00:26,922
Miss...
1351
01:00:27,422 --> 01:00:29,130
...Fine.
1352
01:00:29,505 --> 01:00:30,630
Señora Fine.
1353
01:00:32,755 --> 01:00:34,463
You ever made love to a Mexican?
1354
01:00:36,047 --> 01:00:38,547
Ooh, ooh, whoo!
1355
01:00:38,630 --> 01:00:39,880
Hey, listen, this pong
1356
01:00:39,963 --> 01:00:41,683
- is actually supposed to be my thing.
- Hm?
1357
01:00:41,713 --> 01:00:44,255
So if you could just tone it down
for my sake, my self-esteem...
1358
01:00:44,338 --> 01:00:46,547
No, I think you just have
to step up your game.
1359
01:00:46,630 --> 01:00:49,047
- Oh!
- You just have to rise to my level.
1360
01:00:49,130 --> 01:00:51,505
- It's not my fault.
- To her level.
1361
01:00:51,588 --> 01:00:54,880
It's crazy we haven't hung out
outside of school before, you know.
1362
01:00:54,963 --> 01:00:57,047
I used to think you were all work
and no play, but...
1363
01:00:58,005 --> 01:00:59,380
you're actually pretty fun.
1364
01:01:00,630 --> 01:01:01,505
I...
1365
01:01:01,588 --> 01:01:02,588
I am fun.
1366
01:01:05,130 --> 01:01:06,130
Okay.
1367
01:01:13,213 --> 01:01:14,213
Hi, Miss Fine.
1368
01:01:14,838 --> 01:01:15,838
Hi, Theo.
1369
01:01:37,922 --> 01:01:38,922
Whoo!
1370
01:01:57,297 --> 01:01:58,380
This is amazing.
1371
01:01:58,713 --> 01:01:59,797
You're amazing.
1372
01:02:01,047 --> 01:02:02,047
You're 20, right?
1373
01:02:02,755 --> 01:02:03,755
Yeah.
1374
01:02:07,713 --> 01:02:09,255
You've got a mic. You've gotta sing.
1375
01:02:09,338 --> 01:02:10,630
- No.
- Please.
1376
01:02:10,713 --> 01:02:12,963
- No.
- Come on. Please?
1377
01:02:13,338 --> 01:02:14,463
Do it for me. Come on, Amy.
1378
01:02:14,547 --> 01:02:16,005
For you, okay...
1379
01:02:36,338 --> 01:02:39,213
You can tell she's not supporting.
No breath control. But it's good.
1380
01:02:39,297 --> 01:02:41,297
- It's on pitch. Yeah.Yeah.
- I support you, okay?
1381
01:02:46,255 --> 01:02:49,130
Oh, my God! Oh!
1382
01:02:49,880 --> 01:02:51,047
- Ready?
- Mm-hmm.
1383
01:02:51,130 --> 01:02:52,130
Fuckin'...
1384
01:02:53,130 --> 01:02:55,047
Oh, God!
1385
01:02:55,588 --> 01:02:58,380
- Of course.
- Nick, you need more...
1386
01:02:58,463 --> 01:03:00,314
- Are you okay?
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1387
01:03:00,338 --> 01:03:01,630
You need more of an arc.
1388
01:03:02,088 --> 01:03:04,172
Like... no, too much flick. Like, hoo.
1389
01:03:04,255 --> 01:03:07,255
See, well, that's easy for you to say
when you're, like, three feet tall.
1390
01:03:07,338 --> 01:03:08,922
I'm lookin' straight down at it.
1391
01:03:09,297 --> 01:03:10,338
How tall are you?
1392
01:03:12,297 --> 01:03:13,297
Well...
1393
01:03:13,838 --> 01:03:15,297
How tall do you think I am?
1394
01:03:24,422 --> 01:03:26,088
Five-four?
1395
01:03:27,463 --> 01:03:29,297
My teammates usually aren't this mean.
1396
01:03:29,380 --> 01:03:31,340
Oh, no, no, no,
they're usually blonde and skinny,
1397
01:03:31,422 --> 01:03:33,838
- and they don't drink carbs.
- Uh... No, no way, okay?
1398
01:03:33,922 --> 01:03:35,297
I fuck with Hufflepuffs.
1399
01:03:36,338 --> 01:03:38,172
Hu... Hufflepuff, like Harry Potter?
1400
01:03:38,255 --> 01:03:39,255
Yeah.
1401
01:03:39,338 --> 01:03:41,172
I mean, what, are you, like a...
1402
01:03:42,838 --> 01:03:44,630
half-Slytherin, half...
1403
01:03:45,588 --> 01:03:46,922
Ravenclaw, yep?
1404
01:03:47,797 --> 01:03:49,838
That is exactly what I am.
1405
01:03:50,338 --> 01:03:51,505
Yeah, you are.
1406
01:03:54,463 --> 01:03:55,463
Oh, fuck.
1407
01:03:55,505 --> 01:03:58,606
Okay, see, I'm gonna go take care of them,
make sure they don't kill themselves.
1408
01:03:58,630 --> 01:04:00,189
- But you stay right here, yeah?
- Yeah.
1409
01:04:00,213 --> 01:04:02,505
Okay, don't move. I'll come back
in a moment. Don't move.
1410
01:04:02,588 --> 01:04:04,755
- I'm not gonna move.
- Don't move. Yeah?
1411
01:04:04,838 --> 01:04:08,172
- I feel like you're gonna move.
- No, I'm not... I'm not gonna move.
1412
01:04:08,255 --> 01:04:09,297
- Don't move.
- Okay.
1413
01:08:04,088 --> 01:08:06,488
Oh, my God, there you are.
How's it going? Did you find Ryan?
1414
01:08:06,547 --> 01:08:07,713
Did you guys go in the pool?
1415
01:08:07,797 --> 01:08:09,213
- What's going on?
- Molly...
1416
01:08:09,297 --> 01:08:12,017
Things are going so well over here,
like really, really, really well.
1417
01:08:12,047 --> 01:08:13,727
I'm being so mean to him,
but it's working.
1418
01:08:13,755 --> 01:08:15,898
We talked about Harry Potter.
He knows I'm a Slytherin.
1419
01:08:15,922 --> 01:08:17,856
- He seems to like it.
- I think we should go home.
1420
01:08:17,880 --> 01:08:19,922
Wait, what? No. Just... just dry off.
1421
01:08:20,005 --> 01:08:22,130
No, I think we need to leave.
Come on, let's go.
1422
01:08:22,213 --> 01:08:23,755
Are you nuts? No. He...
1423
01:08:23,838 --> 01:08:24,755
- Nick is fully...
- No.
1424
01:08:24,838 --> 01:08:26,172
He's fully flirting with me.
1425
01:08:26,255 --> 01:08:27,335
This actually might happen.
1426
01:08:27,380 --> 01:08:29,023
- Listen to me, this might happen.
- No, no.
1427
01:08:29,047 --> 01:08:31,130
Molly, please, I'm asking you,
let's just go, okay?
1428
01:08:31,213 --> 01:08:33,630
- Ame, just go find Ryan. It'll be great.
- Malala!
1429
01:08:35,005 --> 01:08:36,005
Amy, no.
1430
01:08:38,422 --> 01:08:39,963
- Are you kidding?
- No, I...
1431
01:08:40,047 --> 01:08:43,880
I've done whatever you wanted all night,
and I'm calling Malala, so come with me.
1432
01:08:43,963 --> 01:08:46,923
No, I'm not leaving just because
you're doing the thing that you always do.
1433
01:08:48,713 --> 01:08:50,130
What is that supposed to mean?
1434
01:08:50,213 --> 01:08:51,797
Just... You...
1435
01:08:52,297 --> 01:08:55,380
You talk a big game, and then you give up
just when things get uncomfortable.
1436
01:08:55,463 --> 01:08:58,338
Like you jumped in the pool, and now
you're sad that you're wet, like...
1437
01:08:58,422 --> 01:09:00,342
- That's bullshit, Moll, that's bullshit.
- No...
1438
01:09:00,380 --> 01:09:02,773
If I didn't drag you to do things,
you just wouldn't do them.
1439
01:09:02,797 --> 01:09:04,297
You... you... you don't drag me.
1440
01:09:04,380 --> 01:09:06,922
You force me to do
whatever you want to do.
1441
01:09:07,630 --> 01:09:08,672
What does that even mean?
1442
01:09:08,755 --> 01:09:11,838
You decide what we do and when we do it,
1443
01:09:11,922 --> 01:09:13,562
and then we always
have to do it together,
1444
01:09:13,588 --> 01:09:14,856
- all the time.
- I have to decide
1445
01:09:14,880 --> 01:09:16,588
because you literally decide nothing.
1446
01:09:16,672 --> 01:09:18,713
Like, I do all the heavy lifting
in our friendship.
1447
01:09:18,797 --> 01:09:21,172
- You never take charge.
- I take charge all the time!
1448
01:09:21,255 --> 01:09:22,713
You never take charge!
1449
01:09:22,797 --> 01:09:25,797
I always have to push you.
Without me, you wouldn't do anything.
1450
01:09:25,880 --> 01:09:29,380
- I'm going to Africa without you.
- Yeah, I encouraged your summer abroad.
1451
01:09:29,463 --> 01:09:31,547
I'm not going for the summer.
1452
01:09:32,172 --> 01:09:33,963
I'm going for the entire year.
1453
01:09:36,880 --> 01:09:37,880
What?
1454
01:09:40,213 --> 01:09:41,672
I'm taking a gap year.
1455
01:09:42,380 --> 01:09:44,338
I deferred Columbia until next fall.
1456
01:09:45,255 --> 01:09:46,422
When did you decide that?
1457
01:09:46,505 --> 01:09:47,505
When I applied.
1458
01:09:49,505 --> 01:09:52,047
In January? You've been lying to me
since January?
1459
01:09:52,130 --> 01:09:55,213
Yeah, because I knew if I told you,
you'd bully me into staying.
1460
01:09:55,297 --> 01:09:57,380
So all our schedules are gonna be off now.
1461
01:09:57,463 --> 01:09:58,838
We're not gonna graduate together,
1462
01:09:58,922 --> 01:10:00,682
not gonna go
on a post-college trip together,
1463
01:10:00,755 --> 01:10:02,922
we're not gonna move to DC together,
our whole plan...
1464
01:10:03,005 --> 01:10:04,505
That was your plan!
1465
01:10:04,588 --> 01:10:05,588
That was never my plan.
1466
01:10:05,630 --> 01:10:07,547
- It's always your plan!
- I can't believe you!
1467
01:10:07,630 --> 01:10:09,470
You think
that going to Africa makes you tough,
1468
01:10:09,505 --> 01:10:11,939
and you weren't even fucking brave enough
to tell me about it!
1469
01:10:11,963 --> 01:10:13,338
You're a fucking coward, Amy!
1470
01:10:13,422 --> 01:10:14,713
You're selfish and mean!
1471
01:10:14,797 --> 01:10:15,838
You're a bad friend!
1472
01:10:15,922 --> 01:10:17,463
You're a fucking bad friend...
1473
01:11:06,797 --> 01:11:07,797
What the fuck?
1474
01:11:10,172 --> 01:11:11,172
I locked that.
1475
01:11:16,463 --> 01:11:17,755
Well, I guess you didn't.
1476
01:11:18,838 --> 01:11:19,963
What's wrong with you?
1477
01:11:20,422 --> 01:11:21,505
Fight with your wife?
1478
01:11:21,588 --> 01:11:23,422
Can you please just...
1479
01:11:24,088 --> 01:11:25,088
leave me alone?
1480
01:11:25,130 --> 01:11:26,505
Why are you even at a party?
1481
01:11:26,880 --> 01:11:30,005
Shouldn't you be, like, marching
in some meaningless protest somewhere,
1482
01:11:30,088 --> 01:11:32,338
or, I don't know,
in your bed doing homework?
1483
01:11:32,880 --> 01:11:33,963
You don't even know me.
1484
01:11:34,047 --> 01:11:36,130
- Pretty sure I do.
- No.
1485
01:11:36,213 --> 01:11:38,963
You're just one of those people
who claims they're honest,
1486
01:11:39,047 --> 01:11:40,630
or calling people on their shit,
1487
01:11:40,713 --> 01:11:42,172
when you're really just mean.
1488
01:11:45,213 --> 01:11:46,213
Wow.
1489
01:11:48,005 --> 01:11:49,213
Wow, I take it back.
1490
01:11:53,880 --> 01:11:54,880
You...
1491
01:11:55,338 --> 01:11:56,630
are a badass...
1492
01:11:57,422 --> 01:11:59,088
who takes no prisoners...
1493
01:12:01,005 --> 01:12:04,380
and cries in the bathroom at parties.
1494
01:12:10,047 --> 01:12:11,422
Why are you so cruel?
1495
01:12:12,880 --> 01:12:14,547
I just don't like meek people.
1496
01:12:16,380 --> 01:12:17,380
And you?
1497
01:12:18,505 --> 01:12:21,505
You're like Molly's little sidekick bitch.
1498
01:12:21,588 --> 01:12:24,630
Well, you're just a basic hot girl
who's gonna peak in high school.
1499
01:12:54,630 --> 01:12:55,672
When'd you get here?
1500
01:12:57,047 --> 01:12:58,047
A while ago.
1501
01:12:58,797 --> 01:13:02,213
See Amy? She fucking freaked out on me.
I don't know what's wrong with her.
1502
01:13:02,297 --> 01:13:04,797
Do people really think
I had sex with a prostitute?
1503
01:13:07,755 --> 01:13:08,838
You didn't?
1504
01:13:09,172 --> 01:13:10,172
No.
1505
01:13:10,838 --> 01:13:12,213
Of course not. I haven't...
1506
01:13:14,172 --> 01:13:15,797
I haven't slept with anybody.
1507
01:13:19,755 --> 01:13:21,755
No one in this entire school
knows me at all.
1508
01:13:25,630 --> 01:13:26,463
Except Gigi.
1509
01:13:26,547 --> 01:13:29,172
I'm a golden starfish!
1510
01:13:31,588 --> 01:13:33,630
Gigi, the girl who jumped off your boat
1511
01:13:33,713 --> 01:13:36,130
and gave you a prison tat
while you were sleeping?
1512
01:13:36,213 --> 01:13:37,505
Oh, that wasn't about me.
1513
01:13:38,880 --> 01:13:41,380
She's a sad person, you know?
1514
01:13:41,755 --> 01:13:43,880
And yeah, she may be a little nuts, but...
1515
01:13:45,630 --> 01:13:47,755
she's the most loyal person I've ever met.
1516
01:13:48,422 --> 01:13:51,963
I mean, she once tried to shiv our mailman
because she thought he laughed at me.
1517
01:13:52,797 --> 01:13:55,088
Turns out, he wasn't...
he wasn't laughing at me at all.
1518
01:13:55,172 --> 01:13:56,797
He was just lookin' at a meme...
1519
01:13:57,255 --> 01:13:58,255
on his phone.
1520
01:13:58,422 --> 01:14:01,297
Plus, not everyone's lucky enough
to find someone like you and Amy.
1521
01:14:01,755 --> 01:14:04,255
I'm just doin' my best
so I can get out of here and...
1522
01:14:04,713 --> 01:14:07,297
find some people
who are into the same weird shit I'm into.
1523
01:14:08,630 --> 01:14:10,713
Not like sex stuff.
I mean, like, you know...
1524
01:14:12,213 --> 01:14:13,672
airplanes and musicals.
1525
01:14:14,130 --> 01:14:15,172
What?
1526
01:14:16,297 --> 01:14:18,047
I wanna design fuckin' airplanes.
1527
01:14:18,755 --> 01:14:21,797
Yeah, get rich off that, and then use
the cash to produce some new musicals.
1528
01:14:21,880 --> 01:14:24,000
Enough with the revivals already.
It's total bullshit.
1529
01:14:24,047 --> 01:14:25,922
Audiences deserve something original.
1530
01:14:26,130 --> 01:14:27,130
I think.
1531
01:14:28,172 --> 01:14:29,297
I don't know.
1532
01:14:29,922 --> 01:14:33,297
I should probably go make sure
that's not an actual dead man's float.
1533
01:14:37,005 --> 01:14:38,755
Well, see you at graduation, Molly.
1534
01:14:55,755 --> 01:14:57,547
Whoa.
1535
01:15:01,255 --> 01:15:02,463
- Um...
- Are you okay?
1536
01:15:02,755 --> 01:15:04,338
Yeah, sorry, I just, uh...
1537
01:15:05,338 --> 01:15:07,098
I just got a little dizzy
for a second there.
1538
01:15:07,130 --> 01:15:09,213
- Um...
- We can stop if you want.
1539
01:15:09,297 --> 01:15:11,463
No, we are not stopping.
1540
01:15:11,547 --> 01:15:12,588
Okay.
1541
01:15:27,005 --> 01:15:28,797
I'm sorry.
1542
01:15:30,047 --> 01:15:31,713
- Oh, oh! Oh.
- Are you okay?
1543
01:15:31,797 --> 01:15:33,130
- Yeah.
- Oh, my God.
1544
01:15:49,255 --> 01:15:50,880
I should probably take off...
1545
01:15:51,630 --> 01:15:52,630
mine too.
1546
01:15:52,838 --> 01:15:53,838
Yeah.
1547
01:16:04,463 --> 01:16:05,463
It's a nice dress.
1548
01:16:05,838 --> 01:16:07,963
It's all she had.
1549
01:16:09,630 --> 01:16:10,463
Miss Fine.
1550
01:16:10,547 --> 01:16:12,547
Oh, my God. Of course.
1551
01:16:38,630 --> 01:16:39,630
Um...
1552
01:16:40,130 --> 01:16:42,380
How... How... How is that for you?
1553
01:16:42,922 --> 01:16:44,547
Um, it's okay.
1554
01:16:45,505 --> 01:16:49,088
Is... Is there, like, another way
you would prefer, or, like, is this...
1555
01:16:49,172 --> 01:16:50,713
I ju... um...
1556
01:16:51,963 --> 01:16:54,203
I don't think that's the hole
you think it is.
1557
01:16:55,380 --> 01:16:56,547
- Oh, my God.
- No, it's okay.
1558
01:16:56,630 --> 01:16:59,172
- Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
- No, it's okay.
1559
01:16:59,255 --> 01:17:00,255
Oh, my God.
1560
01:17:00,338 --> 01:17:02,672
I just... I'm not used
to approaching it from that angle,
1561
01:17:02,755 --> 01:17:04,088
and my... my geometry was off...
1562
01:17:04,172 --> 01:17:06,505
- Seriously, don't worry about it.
- I'm sorry.
1563
01:17:17,130 --> 01:17:18,130
Mm...
1564
01:17:18,297 --> 01:17:20,713
- Wh...
- Are... are you good?
1565
01:17:22,588 --> 01:17:24,422
Aah! Oh, my God!
1566
01:17:24,505 --> 01:17:27,005
What the... what the fuck? Oh!
1567
01:17:27,380 --> 01:17:29,588
- I'm so sorry.
- What the fuck?
1568
01:17:29,672 --> 01:17:32,338
- Oh, my God, I'm so sorry!
- Eww!
1569
01:17:32,588 --> 01:17:33,505
Um...
1570
01:17:33,588 --> 01:17:34,588
Are... Are you okay?
1571
01:17:34,713 --> 01:17:35,922
Amy, just go.
1572
01:17:38,172 --> 01:17:39,172
Please go.
1573
01:17:40,547 --> 01:17:42,463
Oh, sh... Please fucking leave.
1574
01:17:42,547 --> 01:17:45,047
- Sorry, I'm going as fast as I can.
- Go!
1575
01:18:27,088 --> 01:18:28,672
Hey, have you guys seen Amy?
1576
01:18:28,755 --> 01:18:29,755
- No.
- No.
1577
01:18:33,505 --> 01:18:34,380
What the...
1578
01:18:34,463 --> 01:18:35,463
Wait.
1579
01:18:35,547 --> 01:18:37,505
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
1580
01:18:37,588 --> 01:18:39,963
Amy! Amy! Amy!
1581
01:18:40,338 --> 01:18:43,922
We're fucking sitting ducks. They're gonna
come in here, they're gonna find us.
1582
01:18:44,005 --> 01:18:45,380
Shut the fuck up, Rob.
1583
01:18:53,630 --> 01:18:55,047
I am not a coward.
1584
01:18:58,755 --> 01:18:59,797
All right, focus up.
1585
01:19:00,755 --> 01:19:03,380
Wait for my signal.
I'm gonna create a diversion.
1586
01:19:07,255 --> 01:19:08,255
What?
1587
01:19:09,547 --> 01:19:10,547
Hey!
1588
01:19:36,672 --> 01:19:37,672
No.
1589
01:19:38,922 --> 01:19:39,922
Really?
1590
01:20:07,088 --> 01:20:10,713
You know, this is why people say
I gave guys roadside assistance, right?
1591
01:20:12,338 --> 01:20:14,213
I gave them a ride home, that's all.
1592
01:20:19,213 --> 01:20:20,613
Okay, that's not true, I blew them.
1593
01:20:20,672 --> 01:20:23,512
But it's not like they ran out of gas
and I showed up to suck their dick
1594
01:20:23,547 --> 01:20:24,713
while they waited for help.
1595
01:20:24,797 --> 01:20:27,672
We hooked up in their car.
It makes sense to hook up in a car.
1596
01:20:27,755 --> 01:20:30,088
I'm not gonna, like,
suck a dick at my own home
1597
01:20:30,172 --> 01:20:32,297
where my father can walk in
at any moment.
1598
01:20:32,547 --> 01:20:35,172
Also, I wanna enjoy it. Fucking sue me.
1599
01:20:36,588 --> 01:20:37,922
That makes a lot of sense.
1600
01:20:46,213 --> 01:20:47,838
You know what the worst part is?
1601
01:20:49,255 --> 01:20:51,297
All the fucking girls call me that, too.
1602
01:20:54,463 --> 01:20:58,880
I knew, like, Ben and Max
and Dick Splinter would say stupid shit.
1603
01:21:03,505 --> 01:21:04,505
I just...
1604
01:21:04,838 --> 01:21:08,880
I didn't think the girls would, too.
1605
01:21:08,963 --> 01:21:10,338
Amy never called you that.
1606
01:21:13,713 --> 01:21:15,713
I'm sorry, I'm genuinely sorry.
1607
01:21:18,463 --> 01:21:21,630
Just, like, please don't call me Triple A
at Yale next year.
1608
01:21:21,713 --> 01:21:25,088
I just want people to know my real name.
1609
01:21:25,463 --> 01:21:26,505
Of course.
1610
01:21:27,505 --> 01:21:28,338
Annabel.
1611
01:21:28,422 --> 01:21:30,380
Fuck, dude, no, not right now.
1612
01:21:30,463 --> 01:21:31,797
I'm sorry. That was bad.
1613
01:21:31,880 --> 01:21:33,160
- That wasn't my best.
- Come on.
1614
01:21:33,213 --> 01:21:34,981
- Jesus Christ.
- That was embarrassing for me.
1615
01:21:35,005 --> 01:21:36,505
I'm sorry for that too.
1616
01:21:40,088 --> 01:21:41,880
Wait, where the fuck do you live?
1617
01:22:01,672 --> 01:22:02,712
[phone buzzes
1618
01:22:08,713 --> 01:22:10,172
Fuck!
1619
01:22:15,838 --> 01:22:16,838
What?
1620
01:22:21,755 --> 01:22:22,588
All right.
1621
01:22:22,672 --> 01:22:25,130
- Well, just so you know, I know my rights.
- Oh, my God.
1622
01:22:25,213 --> 01:22:27,880
There are more prisons than colleges
in the United States.
1623
01:22:27,963 --> 01:22:29,314
- Did you know that?
- You're right.
1624
01:22:29,338 --> 01:22:32,505
And it costs $71,000
to house an inmate in California.
1625
01:22:32,588 --> 01:22:34,028
That's more than Harvard.
1626
01:22:34,088 --> 01:22:35,880
- Yeah, really?
- Well, it seems excessive.
1627
01:22:35,963 --> 01:22:38,463
Shotgun. Just kidding. I don't have one.
1628
01:23:03,588 --> 01:23:06,308
Oh, I'm actually... I'm actually here
for someone else. I'm so sorry.
1629
01:23:06,380 --> 01:23:08,422
- My mistake. My mistake. My mistake.
- Oh, my God!
1630
01:23:09,755 --> 01:23:11,255
Fuck you, dude.
1631
01:23:11,338 --> 01:23:13,130
Dude, you're in full-on jail.
1632
01:23:15,005 --> 01:23:16,255
Yeah, I know.
1633
01:23:16,713 --> 01:23:18,088
I'm so sorry.
1634
01:23:19,047 --> 01:23:20,672
I mean, it's okay.
1635
01:23:20,755 --> 01:23:24,047
I'm gonna have to pay a fine
and go before the judge,
1636
01:23:24,130 --> 01:23:25,672
- but we both...
- No, I'm sorry.
1637
01:23:26,297 --> 01:23:28,297
Uh... I know women apologize too much,
1638
01:23:28,380 --> 01:23:30,340
but, in this case,
I have so much to be sorry for.
1639
01:23:30,380 --> 01:23:31,380
I was so selfish.
1640
01:23:31,463 --> 01:23:32,713
I... I was being a coward.
1641
01:23:32,797 --> 01:23:33,963
You called Malala.
1642
01:23:34,047 --> 01:23:35,505
I lied to you, Moll.
1643
01:23:35,588 --> 01:23:39,130
You were trying to save me from seeing
Nick rub his boner all up against Ryan.
1644
01:23:39,213 --> 01:23:41,005
Oh, my God, can you believe that,
by the way?
1645
01:23:41,088 --> 01:23:42,630
No. Honestly, no.
1646
01:23:42,713 --> 01:23:44,673
I would have guessed
that Nick hooked up with Theo
1647
01:23:44,755 --> 01:23:46,075
before I would have guessed Ryan.
1648
01:23:46,130 --> 01:23:48,713
Nick and Theo do have great chemistry.
1649
01:23:48,797 --> 01:23:50,505
Divine. I mean, it's palpable.
1650
01:23:53,297 --> 01:23:56,047
I'm sorry I'm so controlling.
1651
01:23:57,630 --> 01:24:00,213
I just can't imagine my life without you.
1652
01:24:03,922 --> 01:24:07,255
You are the motherfucker who got arrested
the night before graduation.
1653
01:24:07,338 --> 01:24:09,047
Oh, my God, graduation.
1654
01:24:09,130 --> 01:24:11,505
Molly, what... what time is it?
You have to go.
1655
01:24:11,588 --> 01:24:13,880
Yeah, why do you think I'm here?
You're coming with me.
1656
01:24:13,963 --> 01:24:15,880
Dude, no, I am screwed. I can't leave.
1657
01:24:15,963 --> 01:24:17,297
- You have to go.
- Amy...
1658
01:24:17,755 --> 01:24:19,505
I am not graduating without you.
1659
01:24:19,588 --> 01:24:23,713
So either I get arrested
and I join you in there or we go together.
1660
01:24:24,172 --> 01:24:25,172
How?
1661
01:24:27,838 --> 01:24:29,797
We're gonna trade some information.
1662
01:24:30,505 --> 01:24:32,422
Because we have seen this man.
1663
01:24:32,505 --> 01:24:33,505
What?
1664
01:24:33,963 --> 01:24:36,148
- Is that Jared's car?
- I'll explain later.
1665
01:24:36,172 --> 01:24:38,023
- Am I driving?
- Of course you're driving!
1666
01:24:38,047 --> 01:24:40,255
- Need this. Go!
- Oh, that was my fault!
1667
01:24:40,338 --> 01:24:42,630
Okay, Waze says 19 minutes.
We're doing it in seven.
1668
01:24:43,005 --> 01:24:44,005
Let's fuckin' do this.
1669
01:25:02,755 --> 01:25:04,047
Ah...
1670
01:25:04,130 --> 01:25:05,810
Hey, guys, let's go ahead and take a seat.
1671
01:25:07,630 --> 01:25:08,922
Stop!
1672
01:25:15,505 --> 01:25:16,505
Ooh.
1673
01:25:16,922 --> 01:25:17,922
Hey, Evelyn.
1674
01:25:18,797 --> 01:25:19,797
Um...
1675
01:25:20,172 --> 01:25:21,380
I just wanted to say...
1676
01:25:22,130 --> 01:25:23,797
Have a great summer.
1677
01:25:23,880 --> 01:25:26,005
That's what the kids are doin', right?
1678
01:25:26,255 --> 01:25:27,422
Have a great...
1679
01:25:28,297 --> 01:25:29,963
All right, cool.
1680
01:25:30,047 --> 01:25:31,713
Cool, cool, cool. Sickening.
1681
01:25:31,797 --> 01:25:33,130
Morning, my queen.
1682
01:25:33,672 --> 01:25:34,672
Hi.
1683
01:25:34,713 --> 01:25:36,630
So last night was amazing.
1684
01:25:37,213 --> 01:25:39,213
Can I see you again?
1685
01:25:42,713 --> 01:25:44,088
Mmm...
1686
01:25:44,172 --> 01:25:45,838
Good luck at Google next year, okay?
1687
01:25:45,922 --> 01:25:47,213
Okay.
1688
01:25:47,588 --> 01:25:48,588
Bye.
1689
01:25:49,505 --> 01:25:50,505
Bye.
1690
01:25:52,713 --> 01:25:54,088
Did you fuck Miss Fine?
1691
01:26:05,130 --> 01:26:06,797
Ha... Has anybody seen, uh, Molly?
1692
01:26:06,880 --> 01:26:09,963
'Cause we've gotta get started.
She kicks it off. Huh? Nobody?
1693
01:26:10,255 --> 01:26:12,380
'Cause I haven't seen her either
since yesterday
1694
01:26:12,463 --> 01:26:14,564
when we were at school, all of us,
at school together.
1695
01:26:14,588 --> 01:26:16,588
So, Molly warned me
she might be a little late
1696
01:26:16,672 --> 01:26:18,032
and tapped me to start her speech.
1697
01:26:18,088 --> 01:26:20,338
- Molly is gonna be late to graduation?
- Yeah.
1698
01:26:20,422 --> 01:26:22,297
- That doesn't sound like her.
- Right.
1699
01:26:22,380 --> 01:26:25,755
Well, uh, she also asked me
to remind you that... um...
1700
01:26:26,630 --> 01:26:27,463
um...
1701
01:26:27,547 --> 01:26:28,547
I got it, uh...
1702
01:26:28,922 --> 01:26:31,838
This sort of thing happens all the time
on the Senate floor.
1703
01:26:31,922 --> 01:26:33,922
And if a senator isn't present for a vote,
1704
01:26:34,005 --> 01:26:36,880
- a proxy can call for a motion...
- Okay. That does sound like her.
1705
01:26:36,963 --> 01:26:39,314
- ...for the vote to take place...
- I got it. Thanks, Jared.
1706
01:26:39,338 --> 01:26:40,606
- ...in her absence.
- Okay, so...
1707
01:26:40,630 --> 01:26:41,630
So she tapped you?
1708
01:26:41,713 --> 01:26:43,088
- Tapped me.
- Okay.
1709
01:26:43,922 --> 01:26:46,755
Yeah, fuck it, I approve, you're up.
You're gonna kick it off.
1710
01:26:47,088 --> 01:26:49,422
- Oh. Oh.
- Okay, there he goes.
1711
01:26:49,505 --> 01:26:51,672
- Yeah, yeah, Shantay, you stay, honey!
- Oh, Jared!
1712
01:26:51,755 --> 01:26:53,005
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
1713
01:26:54,172 --> 01:26:55,172
Look at you.
1714
01:27:04,380 --> 01:27:05,463
Good morning.
1715
01:27:05,547 --> 01:27:06,630
Good morning.
1716
01:27:09,380 --> 01:27:10,630
I'm Molly Davidson.
1717
01:27:10,880 --> 01:27:11,880
Ah...
1718
01:27:22,838 --> 01:27:24,338
I am a woman.
1719
01:27:24,422 --> 01:27:26,505
- I am a powerful woman.
- My boy!
1720
01:27:26,588 --> 01:27:30,672
And I'm ready to take the fists
of my femininity to the status quo.
1721
01:27:30,755 --> 01:27:32,880
Straight, white man,
1722
01:27:32,963 --> 01:27:35,088
your time is...
1723
01:27:35,172 --> 01:27:36,172
Okay.
1724
01:27:48,672 --> 01:27:52,838
Oh, my God, my car is fucked up.
1725
01:28:03,963 --> 01:28:06,588
All right, I'm gonna go take my seat.
I'm gonna go take my seat.
1726
01:28:06,672 --> 01:28:09,630
Come on. Come on! Look who made it!
1727
01:28:09,713 --> 01:28:11,088
Whoo!
1728
01:28:11,422 --> 01:28:13,088
- Amy!
- Amy!
1729
01:28:15,255 --> 01:28:17,505
Whooooo!
1730
01:28:43,088 --> 01:28:44,130
Thank you.
1731
01:28:50,422 --> 01:28:51,547
Okay.
1732
01:28:51,630 --> 01:28:54,005
Looks like Jared did a pretty good job.
1733
01:28:54,088 --> 01:28:55,255
Yes, he did.
1734
01:28:55,338 --> 01:28:56,588
Yes, he did.
1735
01:28:56,672 --> 01:28:58,130
- Whoo!
- Yeah!
1736
01:28:59,713 --> 01:29:00,713
I...
1737
01:29:04,588 --> 01:29:05,672
I was so...
1738
01:29:06,630 --> 01:29:08,005
scared of you.
1739
01:29:08,088 --> 01:29:10,755
I felt like I had to prove
that I was better than you.
1740
01:29:11,338 --> 01:29:12,338
But really...
1741
01:29:13,213 --> 01:29:15,422
I don't know any more than you guys.
1742
01:29:15,505 --> 01:29:19,172
All I know is that
we have a lot more to learn.
1743
01:29:23,838 --> 01:29:25,172
'Cause this part's over.
1744
01:29:26,463 --> 01:29:27,672
And that's so sad.
1745
01:29:29,005 --> 01:29:30,797
But it was great, wasn't it?
1746
01:29:33,213 --> 01:29:36,547
Things are never gonna be the same,
but... it was perfect.
1747
01:29:40,005 --> 01:29:42,047
And... And I may not have before, but...
1748
01:29:42,588 --> 01:29:43,922
I see you now.
1749
01:29:45,338 --> 01:29:47,463
And you're all pretty great.
1750
01:29:48,047 --> 01:29:50,630
Don't let college fuck it up.
1751
01:29:50,713 --> 01:29:51,547
Congratulations.
1752
01:29:51,630 --> 01:29:53,005
I... I see you.
1753
01:29:54,172 --> 01:29:57,213
Whooo! Whoo-whoo-whoo!
1754
01:30:00,005 --> 01:30:01,005
Yes!
1755
01:30:04,213 --> 01:30:06,255
Okay. Okay.
1756
01:30:07,380 --> 01:30:09,380
That went over,
1757
01:30:09,463 --> 01:30:11,630
but I will not be cutting down
my allotted time.
1758
01:30:11,713 --> 01:30:12,838
Gigi, hit the track.
1759
01:30:18,338 --> 01:30:19,898
- That's pretty good.
- Know what's good?
1760
01:30:19,922 --> 01:30:21,047
If you roll these...
1761
01:30:21,130 --> 01:30:22,770
- Hm?
- ...and then you'll have more room.
1762
01:30:22,797 --> 01:30:25,380
- Oh, probably not rolling them.
- Yeah, but...
1763
01:30:25,463 --> 01:30:27,838
- Well, why does it have to be...
- Oh! Look! Oh!
1764
01:30:27,922 --> 01:30:29,547
- God, you're bringing Lingling.
- Mm.
1765
01:30:29,630 --> 01:30:32,172
- Well...
- Oh, Lingling!
1766
01:30:32,255 --> 01:30:33,380
- Um...
- No.
1767
01:30:33,463 --> 01:30:35,713
- Please be good to my Amy.
- I've gotta pack up.
1768
01:30:35,797 --> 01:30:37,856
- Make her feel like she's not so lonely.
- Pack it up.
1769
01:30:37,880 --> 01:30:39,255
Make her feel good. Mm!
1770
01:30:39,338 --> 01:30:42,005
- Amy, make it stop.
- Gotta put that in the old suitcase.
1771
01:30:42,088 --> 01:30:44,297
Please don't put your face on the face.
1772
01:30:44,380 --> 01:30:45,380
Make it stop.
1773
01:30:45,422 --> 01:30:47,755
- On the head, on the neck.
- Not the nose.
1774
01:30:47,838 --> 01:30:48,963
- I got...
- Amy, there's...
1775
01:30:49,047 --> 01:30:50,088
Look who she's bringing.
1776
01:30:50,172 --> 01:30:51,047
Okay.
1777
01:30:51,130 --> 01:30:52,213
Lingling?
1778
01:30:52,297 --> 01:30:53,672
- No!
- Oh, let me get in there.
1779
01:30:53,755 --> 01:30:55,172
No, no...
1780
01:31:00,297 --> 01:31:01,297
Uh...
1781
01:31:01,380 --> 01:31:03,505
Amy, there's, uh, someone here to see you.
1782
01:31:03,797 --> 01:31:04,838
- Hm?
- Who?
1783
01:31:05,880 --> 01:31:06,880
What?
1784
01:31:07,922 --> 01:31:09,505
- Oh.
- Why is she here?
1785
01:31:09,588 --> 01:31:10,588
Excuse me.
1786
01:31:11,463 --> 01:31:13,922
Amy, why is she here?
1787
01:31:25,505 --> 01:31:26,505
Hey.
1788
01:31:26,588 --> 01:31:27,588
Hey.
1789
01:31:28,047 --> 01:31:30,213
I figured I'd bring back your clothes.
1790
01:31:30,463 --> 01:31:32,422
Oh. Thanks so much.
1791
01:31:33,255 --> 01:31:35,963
I don't...
I don't usually leave my underwear
1792
01:31:36,047 --> 01:31:37,380
in... in places that are...
1793
01:31:37,463 --> 01:31:39,088
that aren't my room.
1794
01:31:40,213 --> 01:31:41,213
Yeah, I figured.
1795
01:31:42,547 --> 01:31:43,588
So, um...
1796
01:31:45,255 --> 01:31:46,255
How... how...
1797
01:31:47,213 --> 01:31:49,005
Are... Are you... Are you okay?
1798
01:31:50,213 --> 01:31:51,213
Yeah, I'm fine.
1799
01:31:53,213 --> 01:31:54,380
Are you okay?
1800
01:31:54,797 --> 01:31:55,797
Yeah.
1801
01:31:56,922 --> 01:31:57,922
You know...
1802
01:31:58,297 --> 01:32:00,880
- prison kind of changes you, but, uh...
- Mmm.
1803
01:32:03,213 --> 01:32:04,255
I'm fine.
1804
01:32:04,338 --> 01:32:08,213
I'm sorry, I just... I really don't know
what I'm doing with all that stuff yet.
1805
01:32:08,297 --> 01:32:10,047
Well, for...
1806
01:32:10,672 --> 01:32:13,088
someone who has no idea
what they're doing...
1807
01:32:15,422 --> 01:32:17,005
you kind of know what you're doing.
1808
01:32:20,380 --> 01:32:21,380
That's a...
1809
01:32:22,547 --> 01:32:23,380
Aah.
1810
01:32:23,463 --> 01:32:25,255
Um, that's cool.
1811
01:32:26,755 --> 01:32:28,005
So, how... Uh...
1812
01:32:28,297 --> 01:32:30,630
How is your... How is...
How is your summer going?
1813
01:32:31,838 --> 01:32:35,255
I mean, wh... what are you doing for...
for the summertime?
1814
01:32:38,047 --> 01:32:40,047
I think I'm gonna backpack around
for a bit.
1815
01:32:41,047 --> 01:32:42,172
- Really?
- Yeah.
1816
01:32:42,255 --> 01:32:43,255
Where?
1817
01:32:44,047 --> 01:32:47,005
I don't know. Honestly, anywhere
I can find a couch to crash on.
1818
01:32:47,088 --> 01:32:49,880
I just... you know, I wanna see some stuff
before college.
1819
01:32:50,588 --> 01:32:52,047
That's... that's really cool.
1820
01:32:52,130 --> 01:32:54,588
Me too, that's...
that's why I'm taking a gap year.
1821
01:32:55,088 --> 01:32:56,088
Yeah?
1822
01:32:56,338 --> 01:32:57,338
Yeah.
1823
01:32:57,422 --> 01:32:58,255
Yeah.
1824
01:32:58,338 --> 01:32:59,588
All right, well...
1825
01:32:59,880 --> 01:33:01,088
have fun, nerd.
1826
01:33:09,672 --> 01:33:13,047
Um, well, if... if you ever end up in...
in Botswana...
1827
01:33:14,047 --> 01:33:16,005
you'd have a couch to crash on.
1828
01:33:16,297 --> 01:33:17,463
Okay.
1829
01:33:18,547 --> 01:33:22,213
Well, technically, it won't be my couch,
'cause I'll be staying with a family,
1830
01:33:22,297 --> 01:33:24,505
- but I'm sure they'll be cool with it.
- Okay.
1831
01:33:33,963 --> 01:33:34,963
Yes.
1832
01:33:35,547 --> 01:33:36,547
Yes.
1833
01:33:37,755 --> 01:33:38,922
Molly!
1834
01:33:39,005 --> 01:33:41,463
Amy, this thing drives like a cruise ship.
1835
01:33:42,213 --> 01:33:44,422
Well, it's yours now.
1836
01:33:44,505 --> 01:33:45,880
Take care of the old Volvo for me.
1837
01:33:45,963 --> 01:33:47,588
Oh, speaking of vulva,
1838
01:33:47,672 --> 01:33:49,588
remember when you missed Hope's,
1839
01:33:49,672 --> 01:33:51,547
and you just went straight
for that butt hole!
1840
01:33:51,630 --> 01:33:53,630
I said... I said, "once a day."
1841
01:33:53,713 --> 01:33:55,963
- Hey, I have to stock up.
- Once a day.
1842
01:33:56,047 --> 01:33:59,672
- You're gonna be on a flight for 28 hours.
- I said you could mention it once a day.
1843
01:33:59,755 --> 01:34:00,939
- So I have to stock up.
- Aah!
1844
01:34:00,963 --> 01:34:02,338
It's not my fault.
1845
01:34:12,713 --> 01:34:14,713
Yeah. It feels weird
to be on this side of the car.
1846
01:34:14,797 --> 01:34:17,380
It's like everything's... different.
1847
01:34:19,547 --> 01:34:21,755
Yeah, I can't believe
I'm not gonna see you tomorrow.
1848
01:34:22,380 --> 01:34:24,463
Call me on that weird
international flip phone, okay?
1849
01:34:24,547 --> 01:34:25,547
I will.
1850
01:34:26,588 --> 01:34:27,588
Okay.
1851
01:34:28,422 --> 01:34:29,630
- Bye. I love you.
- Bye.
1852
01:34:29,713 --> 01:34:30,963
Love you.
1853
01:34:32,422 --> 01:34:33,255
Bye.
1854
01:34:33,338 --> 01:34:35,797
- Go make those tampons, girl.
- I will. I...
1855
01:34:36,922 --> 01:34:38,505
- Bye.
- Bye.
1856
01:34:45,880 --> 01:34:47,213
Oh, gotta get that bag.
1857
01:34:47,297 --> 01:34:50,297
Yep. Yeah, it's... it's a long trip.
1858
01:34:50,380 --> 01:34:51,380
Go get 'em.
1859
01:34:53,047 --> 01:34:54,047
What's a year?
1860
01:34:55,755 --> 01:34:56,755
Okay.
1861
01:35:45,755 --> 01:35:47,838
- Oh, fuck!
- Fuck!
1862
01:35:47,922 --> 01:35:50,047
What the fuck is wrong with you?
1863
01:35:50,130 --> 01:35:52,672
I was going through a thing!
1864
01:35:52,755 --> 01:35:53,898
- You weren't... You're...
- Aah!
1865
01:35:53,922 --> 01:35:56,588
I was going through a whole fucking thing!
1866
01:35:56,672 --> 01:35:57,713
What the fuck?
1867
01:35:57,797 --> 01:36:00,422
- I can be the last one on the plane.
- What's wrong with you?
1868
01:36:00,505 --> 01:36:01,505
You wanna get pancakes?
1869
01:36:01,588 --> 01:36:04,047
Fuck, yeah, I do! Fuck, yeah!
130198
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